#we should all definitely live blog and bring hundreds of people to attention of this fucking criminal accusation that has nothing to do w

[cantofworms]

.

#should I write a drblr manifesto ahaha I promise it’ll be super #reminiscent and thoughtful and praise filled ahaha #not at all bitter and angry and overwhelmed and #fucking disgusted at some the weird ass people ahahahahaha #hmmmmmmm should I do that should I should I bc it was an epic time right !!! so epic so fun !!!! sosooooooo girly blogger parasocial girl #girl love everyone’s so nice and kind and we’re all a big happy family pls guys we’re the best !!!! #we deserve to take back the tags we’re all soooooooo normal ahahahaa right !! #we should all definitely live blog and bring hundreds of people to attention of this fucking criminal accusation that has nothing to do w #us bc we know nothing at all like what do we have to lose we’re all secretly aware of eveything pertaining to American law and how libel #work and and and and and and OH you know what we should DEFINITELY DO is ask BLOGS what our moral stand point should be !!!!!!!!!!!! #pack it up guys hari said dream bad and she knows him so much she’s basically his pr manager ahahaha #so silly but actually this random Girl behind a screen w a blog dedicated to mcyt should for sure be giving us constant updates of shit that #can’t be proven with thousands of other forces at play that !! we have no control over !! and never did !! and never wil !!!!!! #ahahaha also VERYONE needs be talking about this and doom posting and throwing around serious terms cause it’s not a big deal ahahaha !!! #dtblr is only three girl bloggers in a trench coat nothing matters and while not influence OTHERS on their opinion in the matter !!! #who also don’t know Jack fucking shit !!!!!!! same as us !!!!!!!!!!!!!! #surely this will have no remaining impact at least not on myself which is all that matters :( #I miss the community sm :( I can’t believe literally everyone is still here just w slightly altered blogs :( #but at this was a wake up call for me ahahaha I’m stepping back I was soooooooo crazy back then ahaha #so happy I realized #my evil ways and I can only better from this situation now god bless #anyway now I will go on and continue to post sad memes on my Beand New Blog and missing and mourning things…… #hashtag sad hashtag girl #OH and also maybe repent my sins a little thro reblgoging someone’s else’s manifesto woopsy !!! ahaha #I don’t agree w %100 of op but this is how I’ve been feeling !!! #I definitely over reacted and contributed to a mass echo chameber of extreme anxiety and toxicity which will forever stain a large majority #of an alresdy massive fandom that’s constantly under hate !!!! oh well ahaha #at the end of the day things will never be the same….. did you hear me I SAID the community while NEVER come back #people are SMARTER now and wil CONTINIE to post their THOUGHTS because what we need more of is GIRL BLOGGERS OPINIONS because there’s NOT #enough to go around tag limit these r my thots if anyone cared ahaha ^_^

[natsukitakama]

What kind of Yandere Floch is ?

Could I please get Yandere Floch since I’m really curious what type of yandere would he be but with a fem s/o who isn’t member of yeagarits and she’s with Hange and others instead, wanted to stop Eren. She’s also afraid of Floch since she can sense something odd about him

Hey I’m that anon who request yandere Floch with a reader who isn’t a yeagarist, well just so you know they’re not dating but perhaps they are friends and the reader is type of person who’s not ready to be in relationship even if she has a crush and Floch is aware of that. you could reply this ask at the same day when you post this request

Hey it’s me again, the same anon who request yandere Floch, there’s something I want to add more is that the reader figure it out that eren was using and manipulate Floch and the reader was telling Floch that he’s being used so really curious what would he tell her. Once again reply this ask until this request is posted which I know you’ll take long but I’m fine with it since I’m patience

Author note : Hi there, first of all thank you for being so patient with me ! I hope you’ll enjoy your request. It’s like a HS of my what kind of Yandere are they with two part : part 1 and part 2, the only difference is this headcanon got context

Before we started, let me reminds you those relationships are TOXIC please be careful. No one should treat you the way they did in this headcanon, you’re precious and deserve someone who’ll be able to take care of you properly.

Warning : violence / Mention of stress / Toxic relationship and behavior / slight nsfw / mention of violence / Spoiler from season 4/manga if you didn't catch up with the manga you might be spoil so be careful

-->if you don’t feel confortable wit those kinds of things don’t read, I want you to feel good on my blog this is a happy place.

Masterlist

We’re going to start with the basic, during a long time you guys got a hate/love relationship

None of you knew if you hate each other or if you were too into each other, like you were always teasing each other, always trying to get on the other’s nerve.

It was kinda cute until it became an obsession for Floch.

He didn’t notice it though. Not at first, he thought that he was genuinely crushing on you. I mean you were pretty hot, you got a big mouth not afraid to tell whatever you had in mind, you were even bold enough to argue with Floch with that damn smirk of yours.

Before he could acknowledge it he was already in his kneel for you (not literally not now though).

But to you, you were just friends. With your life and what was going own outside of the wall you knew it wasn’t the right time to get in a relationship, so even though you were in love with Floch you decided that it wasn’t appropriate to start dating.

But Floch disagreed with you. It was already too late, he was into you. He wanted to be by your side, he was craving for your attention whether it would be by arguing with him, fighting (not in a bad way you know just teasing each other) or even romantic attention.

He wanted to get everything that you might give him.

And he was ready to do everything in order to get what he was craving for.

At first you didn’t mind it, you didn’t even notice how bad the situation was. I mean, you were in love with him and as you got to know him you realized that he went through a lot of things. You were aware that the Shinganshima’s event left a huge mark on his soul and now he was dealing with a trauma that might stay forever.

It pained you to see him sometimes struggling with his dream because he was always dreaming about the death of his friends, the way he almost dies and for nothing. Yeah they got Shinganshima back but now they needed to be strong in order to fight the whole word outside the wall.

He needed to be strong so he wouldn’t live this again, he needed to be strong so no one would be able to touch you. He knew at this point he became addict to you and you were the only who can maintain a sort of serenity around him.

So yeah when it came to Floch you weren’t exactly unbiased, you cared a lot about him, so you couldn’t manage to just straight up and tell him to let go.

And he knows it oh boy he knows and he is not afraid to use it against you.

Especially when it was time to choose your side, would you be a yeagerist or would you stay with Hange ?

He expects you to make the right choice ( aka follows him in case you were wonderin)

But it was more complicated than that, of course you were afraid. Since you’ve realized that your nightmare started because some people outside of the wall (who used to be your boundaries) decided that you were monster who needed to be killed because some of your ancestor made war against them. You weren’t a fool, you were aware that talking won’t be enough, it’s been decades since the outside hated you, but you weren’t ready to use such a powerful and dangerous power (aka the rumbling) against people without being a hundred percent sure there weren’t a way out.

So for now you decided to follow Hange much to Floch’s dismay

Not gonna lie he was ready, I mean he knew everything about you so of course he kinda expected you to not follow him easily (where’s the fun then ?)

Even if he expected you to confront him and not follow him already, he couldn’t help but feel disappointed. I mean why you wouldn’t follow him while all he was doing was fighting for a better word for both of you ? Why wouldn’t you agree with him when he was protecting his people ? Why would you disagree when he was obviously right

So yeah he felt bitterness against you, especially because since you’ve decided to join Hange’s side all you were doing was to confront him about his relationship with Eren. « He is obviously manipulating you ? » « Why are you following him ? I thought he was an ass ? » « We didn’t even try to talk to them how could you be so sure there is no other way ? »

Quickly you came to realize that you couldn’t change his mind which pains you, even though you weren’t ready to be in a relationship for now, you couldn’t help the feeling of emptiness each time you were thinking about him.

Yeah you were missing him, you missed the way you two used to tease each other, you missed his cocky smile each time he was showing off to own some of your precious praise.

But sometimes you swore this man was scaring you, the way his eyes was always on you no matter what (he could have been talking to some of his companion his eyes would remain on you)

Sometimes, you swore that he was following you even though you didn’t have any proof that he was doing it, you just felt it. He was here no matter where you were he was here looking at you from your usual spot to your training spot, you were even starting to think that he was here when you were showering or when you were sleeping.

This sensation was driving you crazy, everyone started to believe that you were a little bit paranoid (yes the man was always looking at you but he told you he was in love so it’s normal right ?)

The feeling became stronger after one of your last confrontation because his behavior (and himself) change brutally :

When you decided to follow Henge-San no matter what, you knew that it would affect your relationship with everyone especially the one you got with Floch. After all he decided to become a yeagarist and to betray everyone in order insure paradis’ safety. In his mind everything made sense, his trauma, all the things he had to go through was because of them, because some people behind the wall decided that paradis was the real danger and needed to be annihilated. What he couldn’t understand was why you hadn’t join him yet ? His goal was noble, he was doing everything to provide you safety. Why were you against him ? Why would you meddle into his plan ? At first, he thought you were playing hard just to amuse him, because you used to love teasing him and while he was enjoying a little opposition coming from you, now that he was about to betray everyone including his superior by changing them into titans he needed to have you by his side. He couldn’t wait anymore, the plan already begun so he needed to convince you to follow him.

That’s why you were here now, in jail behind the bar while Floch was looking at you a frown on his face. No, it was more than that, it was the face you made when you were about to scold your child from acting like a brat. He looked disappointed and quite angry, though you got some ideas why he might be angry you couldn’t however understand why he was so disappointed. After all, you told him that his plan was insane so why was he acting like this ? To be honest you should be the one being angry, he got the nerve to send some rookie from the survey corps find you to arrest you so they could bring you to your jail. You’ve been here since your last argument with Floch and it was like a week ago.

« You know I always knew you were a bad looser but I didn’t expect you to bring me into jail for not being cooperative. Don’t you think it’s a little bit excessive ? Like a LOT »

« Always sassy right Y/N »

« It’s not sassiness at this point it’s just being rational »

« Rational ? You are talking about being rational while being the one who claimed that my plan was full of shit ? »

« I didn’t really say that I just underlined the fact that we still got some cards to play before sending whatever Eren want to send »

« The rambling »

« Yeah whatever that’s not the point »

« It’s definitely the point »

« Absolutely not there is plenty of things to do before even consider sending them titans to kill a whole population »

« A WHOLE POPULATION ? Did you hear yourself y/n ? THEY kill us, THEY were the reason we don’t have a home anymore THEY are the reason so many people died and for what uh ? »

« Not because their government want us dead does it mean the people want our death most of them are probably innocent. There are other way Floch »

« There is no other way y/n the world has to be fix »

« Fix ? Now you are scarring me Floch »

« It doesn’t matter what you think y/n »

« May I ask you why ? »

« Because you’re not leaving this jail »

« I beg your pardon ? »

« Look, here you’re safe from both them and the yeagarist »

« I’m not afraid I’ll kick their ass »

« I won’t take the risk of losing you, so you’re going to stay here all you cute for me yeah ? I Wont be too long I need to work on a little problem then I would be back and you could yell at me as much as you want ok ? I’ll be back »

« No no no Floch look come back OI come back ! I’m not going to stay here you now I’ll find a way out »

« No you won’t nobodies know you’re here I told the yeagarist that you were dead. They won’t look for you, your friends believe you’re dead too. I’m the only person who knows where you are. But it’s okay, it was always about us right ? »

With that he just left your jail, without even a look, all he could was your scream but he didn’t care. The jail was hiding under the military court no one would even think about looking for you here. Besides the wall was thick enough so no one would hear you screaming, for now he decided that you will remain here until he was done saving paradis. But of course, he promised himself to take great care of you so don’t worry.

After this « incident » (aka his way to save you from the trouble outside according to him), his behavior change toward you. You noticed it, he became possessive and rather paranoid when it came to you.

So you might ask what kind of Yandere he is ?

Possessive : I mean he was already possessive before he became the Yandere that he now is, he just lost so many people that now he was afraid that you would be next. So yeah he always makes sure to have his hand on some part to your body mostly your hips or even better holding your hand, since you were attracted to him you let him do his things. But as he falls gradually into darkness, his touch which used to be light touch became more rough. Floch wasn’t holding you anymore he was grabbing you, as if to demonstrate to everyone that he owns you. It wasn’t a mark of affection, but a way for him to illustrate your affiliation to him (as if you were wearing a leash). Speaking of leash, he started to think about it when he notices way too many people was looking at you as if they didn’t understand that you belong to him. And when you two started to be intimate, he was more than ready to mark each inch of your body whether from his teeth, mouth or even from the way he is grabbing at your thigh. It quickly became a habit of him to ask who you belong to especially each time he was giving a rather hard slap from his hips or his hands (because if you think he wouldn’t spank you for being naughty or a brat you’re wrong he loves that) and even though at first you didn’t like the idea of moaning your belonging you quickly discover that it was better for you to just do as he said.

Paranoid : It might because of his trauma from the mission in Shinganshima or because he was more aware about the fact that everyone outside the wall want to erase paradis from the world but he was afraid to loose you. I mean since he joined the survey corps all he has do was losing someone, he lost Erwin, he lost his friends, he lost a part of his mind, he almost lost his life. There is no way he was about to lose you. So yeah as you may notice before, he started by locking you from the world in a jail under the military court after claiming to everyone who wanted to hear it that you were dead. One night he woke up after dreaming that one of the yeagarist would discover you in jail after bringing another prisoner, what if they unlock you ? So after multiple days in jail, without any light, he decided that he couldn’t let you here it was too dangerous, although he claimed to you that he did because he noticed your unhealthy body cause of the lack of light. But since he wasn’t sure if he could trust you enough, he took some handcuff with him so he could link you and him, which made him laugh cause it was as if he put a ring on you. That day he locked you into a house secluded from the world, meaning that you couldn’t reach any city without a horse, it was safe for him and for you and here he was sure no one would ever notice you.

Threatening : Of course, you wouldn’t let him do as he pleased, so some times you tried to kick his ass to steal his horse, or to climb into a tree to help you finding the closest city. You even tried to make him believe you kill yourself so he went completely crazy, screaming, crying so you could knock him you. Unfortunately it never works, and after your failed attempt to leave him he started to threaten you. At first he uses light poison, like he gave you a poison that he mixed on your meal or your drink without you noticing so you were ill during the whole day and you needed to wait like a good s/o that your lovely husband as he calls himself, so he could give you the medicine. Sometimes he even let you believe that he might give you something that will change you into titan like : Do you remember all your officer ? Yeah ? They all drink that famous spinal liquid that change everyone into titan, what if you drank it by accident mh ? Maybe when he gave you food he already mixes your drink with that poison ? Whether it was true or not no one will know, but it works you never attempt to leave him after that.

Violent : I hate to say it, but at some point when dark would entirely cover his mind, he would start being violent against you. Though he would never be something that could kill you, he wanted you to remember that you were living a peaceful live because of him, you were safe because of him. To him you got no reason of being such a brat to him, not when he was giving you everything you wanted. He took care of you, you had no right to be mad at him. So yeah sometimes he had to break your ankle, or maybe your leg so you won’t escape. Sometimes he would strangle you slightly just enough to knock you out. It barely happens because to act like this he needed to be really really angry, like loosing every common sense you know ? So it barely happens but it happens. Your body still have so marks as proof that you shouldn’t get on Floch’s nerve. Despite his physical violence, he tends to be quite violent with his word too so it wouldn’t be a surprise that you’ll break. The emotional amusement in addition with the physical violence would be enough to break anyone so you shouldn’t be ashamed. After all maybe he has been looking for this since the beginning ? Who knows ?

#Attack on titans #aot #aot floch #Shingeki no kyojin #snk #snk Floch #floch forster #Floch x reader #Floch Forster x reader #Yandere Floch x reader #attack on titans x reader #aot x reader #snk x reader #Shingeki no kyojin x reader #snk Floch x reader #aot Floch x reader

[stomp-that-ho-regard]

I typically don’t do asks (I've only ever gotten a few), but a recent one got my gears turning and I wanted to reply.

(This is a secondary blog, so I can’t answer asks in the usual way.)

Your post about the retcon is so fucking good, I wish every critter saw it and actually thought about how shitty it was done, but then their belief in the cast and show would probably start cracking.

Thank you for liking the retcon post. I’ve seen various people in the tags thank me for making that post and have said that it’s helped them ‘feel less insane’. None of us are insane. We are not delusional. We didn’t experience a mass hallucination. These things happened, and they’ve been thoroughly documented. Hundreds of hours of material over the course of three years.

The people who should read that post won’t ever see it because I have all those assholes blocked lol. If they did manage to find it somehow, I know they would just mock it, as they’re wont to do with any of our criticisms. They’re so far up CR’s ass, they’ve convinced themselves that a retcon didn’t happen. Even shoving the literal definition of the word in their faces wouldn’t wake them up.

It's just so fucking weird to see how the group is acting now, and I'm pretty sure we're never gonna get a Laura&Marisha episode picture and a TM episode with those 2 for the rest of the campaign. It feels like when a non-canon wlw ship gets big on a TV show and suddenly the actresses can't be seen or interact with each other anymore🙄 it's the same fucking pattern and like you, I thought I wouldn't have to deal with this on a d&d show.

I specifically want to address the “It feels like when a non-canon wlw ship gets big on a TV show and suddenly the actresses can't be seen or interact with each other anymore” because I’ve thought about that pattern too. (Not so much with Marisha/Laura ‘cause them being on TM together is already a rare combo. If they don’t appear much or at all going forward, I don’t think it’s because of this, though it really wouldn’t surprise me. But, I have been thinking about that specific pattern in regard to their characters.)

I can make a comparison between this situation and what happened with the show A/gent Carter and the way the ship Cart/inelli was handled.

I know that might sound weird, but stay with me here lol...

I want to make it clear that I’m not comparing the relationships at all. Cart/inelli did not have nearly the same amount of build-up and depth as Beaujester, (or quite frankly, their level of possibility.) What I am comparing is the creators over-the-top reactions to these characters being shipped so hard and the extreme measures they went to in order to ‘remedy’ that.

The ship included P/eggy Carter and A/ngie Martinelli. The show was set in New York. Angie was a waitress (who wanted to be an actress/be on Broadway) at the diner that Peggy frequented. They ended up talking quite a bit and became fairly close. That ended up kind of becoming the core relationship in the entire first season, and LOTS of people started shipping it.

At the time, no one was calling us crazy or delusional. At most it was, “This is ABC! They’re not gonna pair her with a woman!” and of course the obligatory “But Peggy’s not gay!”. But no one was calling us names or being generally cruel. And anyone who tried it was ignored because everyone else drowned them out. The ship became extremely popular on Tumblr and Twitter. Both actresses were very positive and supportive. They regularly liked/retweeted romantic Cart/inelli fanart on Twitter. Even one of the female writers on the show got behind it too. It was asked about frequently at conventions and no one booed or rolled their eyes. The questions were never dismissed or made into a joke. (Honestly, this was one of the better overall fandom experiences I’ve had on here.)

And all of us were super excited for S2. Not just because of all the support, but because they had ended S1 with Peggy and Angie moving in together. Peggy had purchased, either it was a really fancy apartment or house (my memory is fuzzy on this), and she literally asked Angie to stay with her. Needless to say, that fueled the flames even more.

But despite the actresses and at least one writer being on board, between S1 and S2, something shifted.

Clearly, the showrunner and/or the execs, took a look at all of this and deemed it a ‘problem’. When S2 finally came around, suddenly everything was different. Instead of both of them living together in New York, instead of it being an organic (I’m beginning to hate that word) continuation from where they left off, Peggy decided to move to Los Angeles to do work for some agency out there or something, and Angie stayed in New York. It’s never explained why. It’s never explained why a woman who so badly wanted to be an actress would NOT want to go to LA, where Hollywood is. LA was never mentioned in S1. There were no hints that Peggy might want to fly out to the West Coast at some point. She seemed perfectly happy in NY, basically setting up house with Angie.

And they didn’t even ease into the change. They just got rid of the character. The actress was bummed about it and Cart/inelli fans tried to put pressure on the showrunner/writers to bring Angie back, which the actress completely supported, but even that fell on deaf ears. So, Angie was simply no longer an entity on that show. Conveniently removed. All the excitement we had was crushed. And of course, the second that Peggy got out to LA, she suddenly had a very obvious male love interest. What a surprise.

The showrunner/writers were not subtle about what they thought about our ship and us. They made the most extreme, nonsensical writing decision in order to permanently separate these two characters. Because, hey, that’s the only way to get the shippers to STOP, right?

This was what I was reminded of when I started seeing the turn that post-hiatus CR was taking. It ended up being a weird combination of kneejerk erasure (BJ) and heavy-handed overcompensation (BY).

But of course, CR is not a TV show, it’s D&D. And they can’t force one of their PCs to just disappear, so what do they have to resort to? Not interacting.

We all know how severely neutered Beau and Jester’s general relationship has become. It’s clear to me that both Marisha and Laura felt they had to do that. They had to suddenly have their characters stay away from each other as much as possible so they could prioritize Fjord and Yasha, and speed-run into romances with them. They started acting as if either of them giving the other one ounce of affectionate attention (like they had been doing so often and so naturally before), would be breaking some sort of hidden ‘relationship code’. Almost like if they ever hugged again, the studio would go down in flames.

The very obvious fact that they went to these lengths, to me, proves two things...

One, it proves the retcon even more, because you can tell that the way they behaved with each other DID in fact change. The frequency of interactions and the way those interactions would play out. Whenever they interact now, it seems like they’re trying to keep it as short, thin, and almost comedic (to the point of goofiness, and not in a good way) as possible. Their engagement seems half-assed and dull. The sounds of their voices, their facial expressions... completely sanitized. Even all the physicality they had is gone; the touches, the hugs, the cuddling. Every single aspect is different and they absolutely did that intentionally. This had to happen because they needed to dupe the viewers into believing that despite overall interest waning, their threadbare connections to Fjord and Yasha are more important, and were always more important then their connection to each other, that we all watched them steadily build. (And watched them pick up steam from about ep70 onwards.)

And two, that whole intentional decision to cut themselves off from each other, proves to me that their interactions pre-hiatus were indeed tinged with ‘something extra’, that was more than just friendship. They both recognized it and that’s why they pulled back so hard. That’s why soft touches and hugs and cuddling are no longer ‘allowed’. That’s why quiet, heartfelt conversations are no longer ‘allowed’. Because if there was absolutely nothing there, if they didn’t see/feel any romantic chemistry simmering underneath, and it was all just platonic BFF stuff, why would they suppress their behavior so drastically?

I think that all of this really does cement what I said in my retcon post: That there are disingenuous patterns being used here that I’ve seen far too often in media. In A/gent Carter, it was a character separation, in CR it was a character dynamic separation. Both done on purpose, to make the shippers shut up, and to push a different plot.

One is scripted, the other is unscripted, but the situations feel disgustingly similar, don’t they?

#op #ask #long post #i feel like i'm just retreading old ground here #still cathartic though

[dessarious]

The Angel of Death Pt6

Inspired by this Story Starter by @someone-ev

AO3   Prologue   Beginning   Previous   Next

“You can summon Tikki if you put the earrings on.” Marinette frowned in thought. The creature already didn’t like her and given that she did have both the ring and earrings it might consider her using them as proof of her intentions. She wanted answers, real ones, not a combative Kwami trying to figure out an escape plan.

“Is there anyway to ask them to come out without doing that?” Nooroo blinked at her, obviously shocked at the courtesy. A bright smile appeared on their face a moment later.

“Yes! Of course I can do that. Do you want to just talk to Tikki or should I get Plagg too?” She cocked her head at him in contemplation. Were all Kwami this eager to please? Would Nooroo be if they didn’t seem to think she was their master?

“Plagg is the one in the ring?” Nooroo nodded. Basic interrogation tactics said to question them separately and see if their stories and answers matched. But this wasn’t an interrogation and she didn’t have a protocol for simply talking. Dealing with clients yes. Dealing with people trying to kill her yes. Talking absolutely not. “Ask them both?” Nooroo gave her another bright smile before seeming to dive into his broach.

With no idea how long it would take she grabbed a granola bar, a bottle of water, and her laptop out of her bags and settled on the bed to wait. That at least she knew how to do. She started scanning her email to see what contract she should accept next and was researching the different targets when a flash of light interrupted her. Nooroo was back, looking proud of himself, along with the red and black Kwami who both looked extremely annoyed.

“Use us or don’t Hawkmoth but I will not be forced to listen to whatever speach you have to make us understand your intentions.” The red Kwami finally looked up and froze with their mouth open. Obviously they’d had more to say but seeing her stunned it into silence.

“You’re not Hawkmoth.” The black Kwami made it sound like a question so she shook her head. Both of them turned to look at the items on the table and then each other. She wondered if they could communicate telepathically. “What do you want?” Blunt and to the point. She liked this one.

“Plagg! Be nice.” The red one, Tikki she reminded herself, scolded the other but they scoffed.

“We have no idea who she is or what she wants and I’m not even nice to humans I do like.” She really liked this one. Nooroo cleared their throat.

“She has questions about the wish.” Both the other’s glared at him for a moment.

“Nooroo, why would you tell her about that?” Tikki sounded exasperated and Nooroo flinched back.

“It’s not their fault.” All three turned their attention to her. She cleared her throat nervously, not sure how to proceed. “Hawkmoth claimed he could bring my parents back to life when he Akumatized me and I was asking Nooroo about it.” Tikki gasped and when she looked to the Kwami they seemed almost scared.

“You’re the one who defeated my holder.” She just nodded, not sure what response the creature was expecting. “And you must have defeated Plagg’s holder as well.” Another nod. “I’m sure Hawkmoth commanded you to deliver our Miraculous to him so how did you end up with all this?” The Kwami pointed to the objects on the table and she hesitated. Would telling them she was an assassin paid to kill Hawkmoth make the situation better or worse? Worse, definitely worse. Would lying to the creatures make the situation better or worse? Probably worse.

“I killed him.” Plagg and Tikki both looked too shocked to respond. The look they were giving her was similar to one Talia always had when she’d screwed up badly. She had the same reaction as always, she started babbling. “I didn’t know about you when I took the contract. I’ve never seen this type of magic before and I just thought it was a meta or normal magical artifacts until I saw you. I didn’t kill him for your powers.”

“Wait, back up. What contract?” Tikki still looked horrified but Plagg looked thoughtful and she addressed their question.

“The mayor hired me to kill Hawkmoth. I can show you the emails if you want.” Now they were all staring at her with varying levels of wariness, concern, and pity. She didn’t like being looked at like that, it woke her pride with a vengeance. “It’s what I do and I’m the best at it so it’s no surprise that he contacted me to handle things. He certainly chose better than whoever gave you to untrained and untried children.” She expected her words to bring fear or at least disgust, but they all just looked even more concerned.

“Oh you poor thing.” Tikki’s words were followed by all three Kwami coming at her before she could react. Plagg was on top of her head, and was he purring? The other two were on either side of her neck, cuddling into her. What the hell?

“How is this an appropriate response to finding out I’m an assassin?” The words just came out in her confusion and she swore she felt Plagg laugh. Tikki floated in front of her face, giving her a stern look.

“Because child assassins don’t choose their line of work and the fact that you’re so concerned for others being forced into a life of fighting tells me that, no matter how good you are at it, it isn’t what you want in life.” She felt tears at the back of her eyes and looked away from the Kwami as she forced them back. She wouldn’t cry and she wouldn’t dwell on things that couldn’t be changed.

“Will you answer my questions now?” She heard Tikki sigh before the Kwami settled on top of her computer. The other’s stayed where they were.

“What do you want to know?” The creature sounded wary and she knew that no matter what the Kwami would try to persuade her not to make a wish. That didn’t bode well given what Nooroo had told her.

“Nooroo said there would be consequences if you wished for someone to be alive. What kind of consequences?” Tikki’s expression was guarded and the Kwami was studying her before letting out a little huff.

“The Miraculous, specifically the Ladybug and Black Cat, are about balance. Any action must be balanced out. In the case of using our Miraculous to make a wish that balance is triggered suddenly and the repercussions are usually devastating and long lasting. The last time a wish was made the Inquisition was started.” Well that was worse than she’d expected.

“What was the wish?” Plagg’s purring stopped abruptly and she could see tears in Tikki’s eyes. The poor thing looked devastated and before she could think the action through, she picked up the Kwami and hugged them close. Plagg ended up answering.

“The woman was Tikki’s holder and despite being bound to the Kwami of Creation she was plagued by miscarriages. The mental toll it took on her was terrible and in desperation and rage she wished all her children alive and well. Creating six lives ended up costing hundreds of thousands of deaths. The balance had to be maintained not just to the number of lives but the potential good and bad each of them could create. It’s not just about one life, but how that life affects others and the world as a whole.”

Marinette sat in silence, thinking, while Tikki cried. Plagg has said potential good and bad not actual actions. It made her think that it didn’t matter what the person actually did in life but rather what they could have done depending on all their choices, actions, and situations. She was almost certain she knew the answer to her next question, but she could help but hope she was wrong.

“What about wishing someone had never been born? Would it have the same effect?” All three Kwami’s seemed to stop breathing. Great.

“Worse.” Tikki’s voice was quiet and solemn. She just sighed. Why could nothing be easy? Just once in her life she wanted something to go right.

“Who do you hate so much that you’d wish they never existed at all?” Plagg’s question caused her to frown in thought. Hate? She didn’t think about it that way but perhaps he was right to say so. After all didn’t you have to hate someone, at least a little, to believe the world would be better off without them?

“Myself.”

AO3  Prologue   Beginning   Previous     Next

Ko-Fi

Tag List

@kceedraws @theatreandcomicfreak @krispydefendorpolice @magic-miraculous @chocolatecatstheron @mooshoon @northernbluetongue @interobanginyourmom @rebecarojas07 @dast218 @abrx2002 @damianette-is-life @yin-390 @fontegagrilledcheese @bigpicklebananatree @tbehartoo @nobodyw8s4evr @linim2503 @ladybug-182 @marinettepotterandplagg @daminett4life @thethirdwheelfriend @corabeth11 @emotionalsupportginger @shizukiryuu @toodaloo-kangaroo @worlds-tiniest-spook-pastry @hauntedfreakdeputyhero @sassakitty @my-name-is-michell @multplelifes @sassydepression @danielslilangel @winter-gardenflower @animegirlweeb @romanoff-queen @nanakeid @paradoxal-occurance @theg0ddesspersephone @hinata3487 @irontimetravelflower @the-real-gingakid @heaven428 @peachedpocky @justafanwarrior @gentlemanoftimetravel @18-fandoms-unite-08 @kittycatwowmeow @pale-lady-dreamer @i-is-mysterious @captainartsypants @write-for-your-life2 @miss-mysterys-blog @schrodingers25

#maribat #marinette dupen chang #assassin Mari #kidnapped AU #plagg #tikki #nooroo

[warriorsredux]

RE: Feedback for the Redux.

(I wanted to give you really in-depth feedback. Unfortunately, it ended up being way longer than I anticipated. I figured it would be easier to send this as a submission rather than breaking it up into a million smaller asks. I hope that’s all right!)

Note: I put this under a readmore to save space, but I have read it all and thoroughly agree with it. Thank you so much for the feedback, man!

Before I get into the nitty-gritty, I want to briefly talk about my personal relationship with Warriors - not because I want to talk about myself necessarily, but because I want to provide some relevant context. You see, I was first introduced to these books in 2004, about when I was nine years old. You could argue, in some ways, that these books defined a large part of my childhood, and were extremely influential into my teenage years and early adulthood. When I wasn’t fantasizing about colonies of talking feral cats, I was gleefully writing fanfics and roleplaying online. Those were my first tentative forays into writing, and would ultimately set me on the path to refine and hone those skills in the years to come. I was obsessed with the mythology and lore of this world, with the sprawling cast of characters, with the steady publication of new entries into the series.

Now, kids tend to not have the best critical thinking skills. Which is why it took until my late teenage years to realize that my cherished books were really, really not that great. The mythology and lore that I’d praised were starved of any creativity, steeped in the cliches of the fantasy genre, and prone to collapsing under their own weight when subjected to even the smallest amount of scrutiny. The characters that I adored? They were blighted with similar cliches, lacking in any sort of growth or development or depth; sustained only by archetypes and whatever retcons the authors thought would sell the most books, either through hype, drama, or fanservice. Exacerbating all of this was the publisher’s insistence on milking the franchise for whatever profit nostalgia could still yield. They weren’t writing more books because they had new, interesting ideas they wanted to explore - they did it because this series was (and still is) fucking lucrative. As I thought about these things more critically, and became more informed on social issues, it became impossible to unsee the uglier aspects of the franchise - the ableism, the queerbaiting and lack of representation, the depiction of minors and adults (Dustpelt and Ferncloud, Thistleclaw and Spottedleaf) having romantic or sexual relationships, the blind nationalism and eugenics/persecution of minorities (non-Clanborn cats) and characters of mixed descent (half-Clan cats). People far more informed and far more eloquent than myself have discussed those issues in-depth elsewhere, but suffice to say, I was understandably upset by these things. No amount of nostalgia could blind me to those flaws.

And yet, for some reason, I never really stopped loving Warriors. Or put more accurately - I never stopped loving the potential of Warriors. That was the thing that I kept coming back to. The wasted potential of a series depicting the lives of feral cats, and their brutal struggle to survive in the wilderness, all the while deeply immersed in their own complex societies and cultures. It became painfully clear to me that the thing I loved about Warriors was the sandbox nature of the franchise, and all the ways fans were able to explore that untapped potential. With that realization now achieved, Warriors slipped into the back of my mind, accruing cobwebs as the years passed. Occasionally those dormant thoughts stirred whenever I saw a piece of fanart on my dashboard, or I passed a new release while browsing the local Barnes & Noble. Sometimes I even entertained the fleeting thought of writing AU fics again. But by and large, Warriors had been retired from my thoughts.

And then, in 2017, I found the Redux.

While writing this segment I had several false starts, in no small part because I didn’t know what to talk about first. It was like someone had gone through my thoughts with a steel-toothed comb, and took every disappointment, every what if, and turned it into a reality. Holy shit, look at this blog! Look at the meta commentary! Look at all of the worldbuilding! I could clearly see just how much passion and attention to detail was put into developing the plot and the characters. How many hundreds of hours went into correcting the broken genetics of the canon characters. Suddenly, the Clans had culture - real, living, breathing culture! There was a pantheon of deities and demigods. A deliberate intention behind the naming tradition beyond slapping two words together because they sounded pretty or made for a trite pun. This. This was the story Warriors should have been. This lone blog managed to conceive an original lore for the Clans, while further developing the canon plots beyond their base elements. What three authors failed to do, one person achieved on their own.

You made forgettable characters interesting. And you made interesting characters unforgettable.

I lived for every scrap of content you created - the asks, the deconstructions, the amendment posts, the art, even the fucking shitposts (because they were just genuinely wholesome and funny). The Redux wasn’t just a source of entertainment, either - it introduced me to the idea of writing an AU that was sustained by meta-analysis, and grounded in critical reception of the series’ flaws (both technical and social). Your work eventually inspired me to create my own Redux-style worldbuilding/AU blog for a series that has similar issues to canon Warriors.

The Redux deserves all the praise it gets, and you should be extremely proud of what you’ve accomplished. Even if the Third Arc wasn’t finished or the Fourth started, it was still a helluva ride, one that I’m so glad I got to participate in.

But, of course, you asked for feedback, so I can’t spend the entirety of this post throwing roses at your feet. So, onto the constructive feedback.

I think a lot of my thoughts are going to echo what other people have previously said, but for me, the biggest setbacks in the Redux were the following:

[1] Pacing. This is going to sound weird, but this isn’t a criticism of the Redux’s length. Rather, it’s more about how that time was spent. While I really like how you adjusted aspects of the Redux’s plot in order to still tangentially align with the books’, it sometimes felt like the chapters were there just to connect points A and B. I knew this was a retelling of the original series, so I already had a vague idea of what the general storybeats would be. What appealed to me was how the story would get to those points. Let me give you an example: in Arc 1, we’re told in chapter 10 that Murkpelt is roaming the territories, and poses a threat to the Clans. Immediately in chapter 11 we’re taken to the scene where Firepaw finds her while escorting Spottedleaf. We’re told about ThunderClan’s efforts to track her prior, and about the looming tension in the wake of this invisible threat. But that’s the thing - we’re told that by the narration in just a paragraph or two. We’re not shown what that looks like. The setup is supposed to be everyone being on edge, but Bluestar’s lounging by the stump when the scene begins. It’s a little dissonant, and it has the unfortunate problem of contradicting the narration. It would’ve been so cool to see a chapter or two where Firepaw’s still trying to immerse himself into Clan life, and his questions are met with terse answers or impatience. Undercut his (and the reader’s) learning with other characters being brusque with him, or short-tempered, or something. And then that could lead into Greypaw or Ravenpaw consoling him and explaining why the situation is so serious. Then Firepaw could ask something like, “Have there ever been instances like this before with rogues?” Which could organically lead to a conversation where Greypaw or Ravenpaw bring up relevant lore/worldbuilding. It’s little stuff like that which would’ve helped with immersion and pacing. I think it would have balanced the two out, by providing pseudo-downtime where the audience experiences the world as the characters do. (If that makes sense.) Or, to provide another example: we never get to see Tres Idiots mentoring Snowpaw. In chapters 5 and 6 of Arc 3, we see Raventhroat struggling to develop a signing system he can use with his apprentice; and then, after a few chapters he’s perfectly narrating the Bright-Eyed Crow to Snowpaw. I think that showing us scenes where the two were actually working out the kinks would have done more to develop Raventhroat’s character arc. He went from being a meek, timid apprentice to an eloquent warrior, and him becoming a mentor is supposed to be a definite part of that journey. It would’ve have been so cool to have plot-relevant scenes broken up by smaller ones where we watch Raventhroat gain confidence through each small success he makes with his apprentice. I’m not sure if I’m conveying exactly what I want to say, but I guess the TL;DR would be something like - I would’ve gladly welcomed either more chapters, or longer ones, if it meant we got more scenes like this.

[2] Utilization of the worldbuilding. You mentioned this already in response to another ask, but if you could go back and change anything, it would be incorporating more lore/adhering the Redux to its lore more strongly. Your worldbuilding is perhaps the strongest part of the Redux by far. You gave us a conlang, traditions, folk stories, Clan stereotypes - so much fascinating material - but it feels like its integration was based solely on whether or not it was relevant to the plot at hand. Unless there was a reason why it was brought up, then we’d never get to see a ThunderClan cat freaking out near a ShadowClan seer and refusing to approach them at a Gathering. Or listen to Mistfoot share a poem with Greystripe and Fireheart (after being goaded into it by Silverstream). Or watch as Redtail politely interrupts the elders and asks for their opinion on an important matter. Or listen to the Clan getting together after a loved one dies and share stories about their life. Or watch as Sandpaw/Dustpaw use their age and seniority over Firepaw to terrorize him with stories of Yrrun and Terror. On one hand, I absolutely understand why a lot of lore was relegated exclusively to the Amendment section - it’s important to strike a balance between what’s interesting versus what’s relevant. You don’t wanna just throw worldbuilding trivia at the audience apropos of nothing. On the other hand, I really wish I’d seen a much larger integration of your worldbuilding into the story, because it’s so fascinating and so god damn good.

[3] Utilization of the characters. One of the things you tweaked, that I absolutely loved, was choosing to introduce Silverpaw in Arc 1 at a Gathering. Not only does it create a realistic basis for her friendship with Tres Idiots, but it fixes the canon’s issue of her saving Greystripe out of nowhere and then developing a relationship on that alone. That was fucking great! Same thing with Rainpath - it was so awesome for Fireheart to get a friend in another Clan (ShadowClan, of all Clans). It broke the mold, and their interactions were just delightful. But outside of those examples, sometimes it kinda felt like the side characters didn’t really exist? I remember an old piece of writing advice, but I can’t recall who it’s attributed to: “Treat your side characters like they think they’re the main characters.” Because they absolutely are. I might be some passing stranger in another person’s life, barely a blip on their radar, but I have my own vibrant story. Everyone does. In the Redux, it sometimes felt like minor or side characters weren’t living their own lives outside of their interactions with Fireheart and his friends. Mousefur’s the most fluent speaker of Fang in ThunderClan? Cool. How did she learn that skill? Who taught her? Does she have a friend in WindClan who’s been teaching her new words at Gatherings, or whenever they happen to cross paths while on border patrols near Four Trees? Not only is that character trivia interesting, but it could provide foreshadowing/become relevant later on. When the Clans meet to discuss how to deal with the dogs in Arc 3, perhaps someone suggests having their most fluent Fang speakers act as interpreters/diplomats, and try to broker some sort of peace/understanding with the dogs. Things like that. Basically, it would’ve been nice if Fireheart’s life intersected more with the goings-on of his Clanmates, or if his own goals/agenda were sometimes inconvenienced by the goals/agenda of others.

I think those are my major criticisms. More integration of lore, a slower/steadier pace that accommodates showing over telling, and finding ways to have the personal lives of minor characters interact with the story. Maybe adding in some additional subplots that are congruent with the main plots, and occur simultaneously, in order to keep chapters busy. That sort of thing. I hope what I provided wasn’t overwhelming in any way, and ends up being useful for either the Redux or any of your other writing projects.

As an aside, thank you. For creating this humble niche community within an even larger fandom. For asking for feedback from your readers. For being someone who makes mistakes, but eventually endeavors to learn from them, and ultimately, become a better person. I know this sounds kinda sappy, but I really do mean it. <3

(For the record I wrote this at like five in the morning, so if there are any grammatical errors I’ll be kicking myself in the ass for those.)

#silvokrent #submission #i speak #kind of #textwall #readmore

[jane-fucking-seymour]

Dancing In The Dark

It had been years since Six the Musical went dark.

The queens had since moved on with their lives:

Catherine had finally gone back home. The oldest queen took the funds given to her by the Spanish government and settled back in her home from way back when, unrecognizable at first but eventually found to be familiar. She had intended to live alone, not wanting to influence anyone else’s decisions about the next chapter in their lives, but of course Maria refused to be anywhere else but her mistress’ side. Catherine Parr, somewhat surprisingly, joined her, and the trio settled down in a comfortable estate and started up their own non-profit to help combat illiteracy for womxn around the world.

Anne Boleyn had immediately approached Maggie to live with her in France, offering her a chance to start up a new type of performance art: livestreaming on Twitch and posting blogs on YouTube. The duo became wildly popular online, filming anything from travel blogs to personal monologues to wacky edits that went viral as soon as they were published. Anne also worked closely with women’s shelters to help women affected by domestic violence get back on their feet.

Surprisingly, Anne and Maggie were not alone in the neighborhood: right next door was Jane Seymour and Joan Muertas, with some of the most successful baking and craft videos on the internet. Jane had expressed an interest in leaving England altogether long before the show ended, and once it did, she jumped at the opportunity to go anywhere but there. Anne and Jane’s friendship had come a long way since the start, and now the two were constantly collaborating, constantly working together as much as possible, the unstoppable duo of the internet being able to support themselves, their ladies, and their shared need to support women’s shelters.

Anna of Cleves had, naturally, been one of the more adventurous queens post-show, taking Bessie with her on a trip around the world before they both settled down in Germany. Bessie became Anna’s executive assistant at her fashion company, which was dedicated to creating fashionable wardrobes for womxn of all shapes, sizes, and budgets. Their company grew to become one of the most successful brands in the world, and Anna found herself sitting on a throne of her own making.

This left the fifth queen, Katherine Howard, who had decided to do something surprising: not only to stay in London, but to work at the Tower of London, of all places. At first, the other queens objected, and all offered (some begged) Katherine to come with them elsewhere. Katherine, though, always felt a pull to her death place, always felt connected to it ever since she returned. She had decided that it was where she belonged, morbidly enough, and she strived to not only overcome her fears, but to help others do so as well. She told her story to the world as the most popular tour guide in the Tower and then campaigned to strengthen laws and regulations regarding sexual assault and child exploitation, helping children around the world to never be in the place she once was. She became a beacon of hope for many around the world, dedicating her life to the cause with the Tower of London now her home away from home.

This led to present day, where Katherine was getting ready for the biggest fundraising gala of the year: the Howard Banquet.

The Howard Banquet was named after Katherine herself, who would bring in hundreds of millions of dollars to be split amongst charities worldwide. It took up much of her attention for the past few months to plan the yearly event, with celebrities and the best of people invited to celebrate the importance of the charities involved and to help campaign for better and more accessible resources around the world. It was to be done at the Pavilion at the Tower of London, as it always was, as a nod to Katherine’s own history.

The red carpet was set out and Katherine was the first to enter the building, going through the press line and meeting with some board of directors. Her flowing dark pink dress was a highlight, and she smiled brightly as she explained it was made by Cleves Designs, per usual. As she continued into the venue, her friends from the Tower of London soon joined her, and the party started.

She was enjoying herself on the dance floor when she suddenly stops, feeling… weird. Something in the back of her head was telling her to look around, that something was there… and sure enough, there was.

A woman in a dark yellow and black dress walked through the outskirts of the dancing, and Katherine barely saw her. Her hair was up in her signature ponytail, though, curly locks bouncing as she tried to swiftly move through the crowd. Even with the darkened room and strobe lights, Katherine saw the girl look for her out of the corner of her eye, eyes widen, then try to move faster through the crowd, towards the open bar.

Target acquired.

Katherine instantly was on the move, going straight past everyone else, ignoring the questioning calls from her friends as she beelined straight to the accelerating person. Just before the girl turned a corner, Katherine was suddenly in front of her, narrowing her eyes.

“... Maria?”

Maria de Salinas was trying to look everywhere but Katherine at the moment, even though she was cornered. She looked to her left, and Katherine followed. She looked to her right, Katherine moved right into her eyeline. Finally, Maria simply decided to look at the corner, and Katherine actually wedged herself between the wall and Maria to get the girl to look at her. 

“Maria!!!” Katherine says, smiling brightly. “Come on, I know you can see me!”

Maria sighed, shaking her head, before she looked right at Katherine.

“Ohhh, Katherine!” She says, giving a small smile. “Fancy seeing you here!”

“Yeah-huh,” Katherine replies, raising an eyebrow and not at all hiding the smirk on her face. “In my own gala? That is named after me?”

Maria scrambles for an answer.

“Funny coincidence, eh?”

Katherine stares at her for a moment more before throwing herself into Maria’s arms. Maria laughs, holding her tightly, swinging her around before Katherine continues to talk, not letting go of Kat’s hands.

“Why are you here?!?” Katherine asks. “Did they ask you to perform? They didn’t tell me the singing list, that wasn’t my department this year, but-”

“Shh, Kat, no I’m not part of the band,” Maria replies. “I’m just here.”

Katherine tilts her head. “Alone?”

Maria blinks. “Yeah.”

Katherine narrows her eyes again. “No, you’re not.”

Maria raises an eyebrow. “Oh?”

“Yeah.”

“You callin’ me a liar, Kitty-Kat?”

“Where is she?”

“Dunno who you’re talking about, babes.”

Katherine is still not buying it.

“You’re never too far apart, she’s definitely here.”

“Who?”

“Catherine!”

“Don’t know anyone by that name, nope.”

“Wot?!?” Katherine asks, and Maria laughs loudly.

“Listen, even if I knew where they were-”

But Maria realizes her mistake too late.

“THEY?!?” Katherine yells, so loudly it’s clear over the music and everyone stares. “THEY are here?!?”

Maria definitely realizes that she had said too much, and she mock-zips up her lips and refuses to budge afterwards, winking at the girl before rushing off. Katherine tries to follow, but Maria is lost in the crowd.

Kat huffs, annoyed, but not deterred.

She knows that Maria was headed towards the tables, so she casually wanders over there, trying to look the least suspicious possible. She sees Maria lock eyes with her across the way, then heads back towards the bar…

… but that doesn’t make sense, considering the lady was going for a drink, she assumes for Catherine and Cathy. Maria is definitely leading her astray.

With a smirk, Katherine takes her phone out and texts Cathy:

[Text: Parr] I know you’re here.

Katherine scans the room, waiting to see if there’s anyone around that opens their phone. She looks around long enough to get a reply:

[Text: Parr] Not sure what you mean, babes.

Katherine scoffs at that; she’s definitely here. No way she’s not. 

She wanders around the table section, keeping a close eye on who is sitting and her surroundings: there’s not much rhyme or reason to the people around her, so she goes one by one, looking for anything 

There’s a person in a tux.

There’s the host of the evening.

There’s a guy with a service dog.

There’s eight women with their backs turned to her trying to avoid being caught.

There’s a group of women from the shelter.

There’s a family receiving an award tonight.

There’s-

Wait.

She goes back to the third from last group, narrowing her eyes once again. There’s a woman in a gorgeous dark yellow dress, similar to Maria’s but a bit more lavish, golden jewelry complimenting the outfit. There’s a woman in a long, green dress, sleeves included. There’s a third woman in a black and white jumpsuit. There’s a fourth woman in a maroon tux. There’s a fifth woman in a blue suit. And finally, there are three women in dresses similar to the one in green, the one in black and white, and the one in red.

And all of them are absolutely refusing to look in any direction.

Again, the girl makes a beeline towards her target, avoiding even Maria’s call. When she gets close, she can hear them talking.

“Do you think she saw us?” Asks the girl in blue.

“I doubt it, there’s so many people here,” the woman in yellow says.

“I don’t know, she already caught Maria, I bet she’s definitely looking for Catherine,” says the woman in red.

“Maybe we should huddle up around her?” the one in black and white asks. “Might be easier to hide you.”

Katherine steps up and gently pushes her way into the group.

“Yeah, that might work,” Katherine says, as calmly as possible. “Maybe you should just call Maria back, might work.”

“Good idea, Kit-” the green dress lady says, but then she gasps.

The collective scream from the queens and ladies in the circle is enough to shock everyone around them.

Katherine is instantly embraced by the queens, laughing as they all take turns saying hello. She can barely speak with how excited she is, bouncing on her toes as she talks excitedly.

“You’re all here?!?” she asks, bouncing more and more and more. “Why are you all here?!?”

“We were invited,” Jane replies with a massive grin. “By your foundation. It was supposed to be a surprise, but, well…” Jane shrugs.

Maria happens upon them then, sighing playfully before she gently puts a hand on Katherine’s shoulder, causing Katherine to moreso bounce faster but not as big as before in place.

“I’m sorry, I thought I could sneak past her,” Maria says with a chuckle. “She’s too good at this.”

“I just! It’s been forever since last, and I miss you all, and-!” Katherine says, right before she goes for another hug to the most close person - Maggie this time, who welcomes the affection. “I missed you all a lot.”

Jane gently brings her girl into another hug. “We all missed you, too. And it was great fun catching up with everyone.”

Katherine nods happily, smiling so widely her face hurts. 

The rest of the evening, Katherine is never far away from her queens and ladies, dancing the night away. Even during the performances and the awards and the speeches, Katherine is arm in arm with at least one queen, clearly showing how much she missed them.

Towards the end of the night, Katherine and the others are outside, taking a breather in the warm night air, the Tower of London now a comforting sight behind them. 

“So, when’s the next time you lot will be around my neck of the woods?” Katherine asks, sipping on a glass of wine.

“Well, actually-” Maria starts, but Joan picks up.

“Jane and I are here for the next week,” she replies.

“Oh! Would you look at that?” Bessie says, looking at her smirking queen. “We’re the same.”

“Snap,” Maggie replies. “Anne and I are here for that long, too.”

“And us!” Maria finally gets in. “Cathy, Catalina and I are hanging out for the week.”

Katherine’s jaw straight drops.

“You’re… you’re all here? For the week?”

When they nod… well, Katherine tears up.

“Oh, love, I’m sorry,” Anna says, grabbing a napkin to help Katherine dry her eyes. “Is that too much?”

Jane is immediately at her side, a hand on her girl’s back, but when Katherine looks up, she’s smiling. They’re happy tears.

“I just! It’s been forever, and now I have you lot for the full week!” Katherine says, laughing loudly. “I just… I love you guys, you know that right?”

“Awww, Kit!” Anne says, moving to hug her cousin. “It’s okay. We’re here for the next week. For whatever you want.”

Katherine smiles brightly, nodding happily.

“I think this’ll be the best week ever!”

#six the musical fanfiction #six the musical fanfic #six fanfic #six fanfiction #sixfic #katherine howard #maria #maria liw #bessie #bessie liw #joan #joan liw #maggie #maggie liw #catherine of aragon #anne boleyn #jane seymour #catherine parr #anna of cleves #anne of cleves #six the musical

[graphicabyss]

?人 NEWS

I wrote an enormous post, or rather an essay, concerning NEWS, Tegoshi, and everything that went through my mind in the past month. Honestly, it’s mostly my way of coping, getting it out of my system and sorting out my thoughts and feelings. But I decided to also post it here for those who might want to read.

It was a long time coming. The rumours were lurking around for years and a month ago they bloomed. And yet, the full realization is yet to dawn on me. When something devastating happens, our mind tends to shake off the pain by either exonerating the beloved person who hurt us, or blaming them and distancing away from them. It's really hard to stay objective. But I'll try.

Coming into this fandom, I prepared myself for disappointment. Once I was a TVXQ fan. You know, the 5-nin TVXQ that was going to be "together forever" and all that. So I wowed never to get that invested in a pop band. When NEWS came along, I tried not to get too attached. I knew it would hurt me, sooner of later. And for awhile, it worked. But, as years went by, I knew I lost the battle. We humans need to cling to something. Thus, nearly 7 years have passed.

To me, Tegoshi has always been a key component. He was the one that led me to NEWS. Or rather, how pretty he looked in a dress. Tegoshi always kept me interested. Sometimes he excited, sometimes he annoyed, but he was never ever boring. He was made of contradictions, both in words and in actions. Nothing ever adds up with him. He made me want to understand him but I could never quite grasp it. Thinking about it now, perhaps it was because he doesn't really understand himself either.

In these years, I had several crisis points where I considered leaving the fandom, all caused by something shitty Tegoshi said or did. But every time I bounced back. Of course, I didn't do it for him. I did it for myself. However, his selfishness has always been offset by his kindness. The last time was him crying at the end of Neverland tour and how sorry he looked. Till the end, I wanted to believe that his common sense and loyalty won't let him do something reckless and stupid. Yet, here we are. The interview he gave to Bunshun led me to believe that he would do the right thing. He said he would show his gratitude to JE and would definitely make his fans happy but now it's the furthest thing from the truth. The fandom is disappointed, confused, angry.

Some people say to get over it, that Tegoshi was meant to leave or some shit. But I think those people fundamentally misunderstand the heart of the problem. It's not that he left that infuriated the fandom. It's how and when he left. Most fans would support his decision to leave if the transition was done properly. He owed us that much. A proper apology. A proper gratitude. A proper farewell. The announcement had me in disbelief. I expected him to at least finish the contract, do the Story Tour, no matter how long it takes, and show the members, staff and the fans the respect they deserve. To cut it short feels like a violation. At the very least, we need a closure. The last goodbye. The last concert. The last something. He just left JE after 17 years like it was nothing.

More than anything, what he did seems so stupid. He had it so fucking good. He was always in the spotlight, both on stage and in TV shows. The other members did most of the offscreen work allowing him to shine. He was supported by endlessly patient members and staff. He had the freedom to choose and all the work he wanted for each of his passions - ItteQ, Soccer Earth, OpenRec. And he had fans that always supported him, no matter how many scandals he had.

What was so important that he had to give up on all the amazing benefits he had? To betray all this trust? And on top of it, at a time like this? When all world is going through so much shit? When the fans need moral support more than ever? What were the "dreams" that he talked about?

The ability to rant on Twitter? Making duckface selfies? Fucking around? Assembling a shitty rock band? Performing with strippers? Some kind of unique business opportunity? He talked for years about wanting to perform overseas or hosting fan events but right now these things are offlimit anyway. Why couldn't he at the very least explain his decision properly? Just that alone will definitely hurt his further career in the long run. The press-conference lasted 2 hours but it answered none of the questions that really mattered and there was no remorse. Though at this point, I can't trust anything he says anyway. He created his Twitter account the the evening it all went down and didn't bother explaining himself. He just jumped off the ship and let other people deal with the damage.

Even now, it all seems like some kind of bad dream. Then again, all of the 2020 does.

When I first saw "手越退社" trending on Twitter back in May I felt like I was spinning into a downward spiral, like all air was sucked out of me. And it wasn't the "oh, no! what will the band do?" I never went to a NEWS concert and never brought any merch. To me, it wasn't really the feelings of a fan whose band faces a crisis but rather that of an entrepreneur who invested too much money into one asset and watched it plummet.

Fandom stuff is a currency that can devalue in a blink of an eye. Its valuable as long as its core message is intact. This is why I can't stand people being petty over scans or videos. I share when I can knowing it will make someone happy because I know that tomorrow that someone might move on. When I stumble upon old closed journals with password-protected downloads they feel like ancient abandoned temples. The treasures in them turned to dust.

4nin NEWS were based on unity, the combination of 4 unique characters. Four components, each of them essential. Now that concept failed. It's like standing in front of a collapsed building. I try to assess the damage. How much of it can I salvage? Repurpose? How much is lost and needs to be cleaned up? Should I even bother?

What do I do with hundreds of live performances and TV shows, in HD, lovingly downloaded and stored?

What to make of thousands of scans, magazines, pamphlets, almost each image edited and sorted? Thousands more stored neatly in folders, waiting to be posted. Countless screens and gifs.

What of the member ai fanvideos that gained over 100k on Youtube bringing joy to so many people? I already got the first heartbroken comment saying "we won't ever see them like that again, will we?"

What to make of my unfinished stories? Honestly, it's one of the things I'm most proud in my entire life. Now their future is uncertain.

Do I take down the poster on my wall? The CDs on my shelf? Soon I will have to looks at my enormous stash and decide for each item. Things that once brought joy now cause pain.

NEWS weren't selling music, they were selling ideas and dreams. The cute band photos now cause hurt and anger. The uplifting songs about unity won't be convincing. All the concerts lost their charm.

Am I being too dramatic? Probably. Perhaps the issue itself may seem trivial to an outsider but our grief is real.

Tegoshi keeps saying he loves NEWS and adores the members. But to me, loving is doing everything you can to avoid hurting the ones you love. Perhaps he means it, but that love will never compare to the love he has for himself. Despite what he says, I doubt we'll even see them together again and I'm not even sure I want to. I knew apart from Koyashige, the members aren't really that close personally. Tegoshi is shallow and seeks popularity more than anything. I'm sure than now he'll hang out with even shadier characters than before. The members used to provide him with the much needed tough love. Now, with nothing and noone holding him back, he'll give in to his overblown ego.

I'm not sure how I feel about NEWS continuing as 3. I mean, I support their decision and that's probably what most fans want but to me, I don't know if it'll work out that well. They were already a band with a lot of luggage and now, just like in 2011, they are a band that induces pity. They would have to rearrange so much to try and fill this huge gaping hole. Not to mention they will struggle vocally. No songs, no choreography can be unaltered. It might be better to go on within the agency doing their own things. But then that would just mean Tegoshi was indispensable and all the work they put in will be wasted. The Story must be competed.

In the past week I went through various stages of grief. The anger was strong and so was disbelief. Now it's finally subsiding, giving way to acceptance. It won't come soon but I'll let all the emotions run their course. The fact is Tegoshi remains very entertaining and the temptation to keep following him and rant about him is strong. I probably wouldn't even fight it if he were to leave with at least a shred of dignity. But with the way things are, I refuse to support him in any way. And I will at least try to phase him out as much as I can as I realize that even my anger is playing into his hands as he wants nothing more than attention, good or bad. Instead, I'll try to focus on those who do deserve support.

I'm not yet sure how to proceed with the blog and everything else but I'll take my time and figure it out. The truth is Tegoshi was one of the two major things that have kept me here for so long. And no, the second reason is not Shige. It's the people. Out of all the fandoms I've been in over the years this one really felt like home. I met so many amazing people here, even though many of them have since moved on. I felt accepted and appreciated.

This week has been an emotional roller-coaster. But today I feel fine. I have a dozen reasons to be depressed. But I'm not miserable right now because of the fandom. I've had about 10 people write to me within several days. Some of them I haven't talked to in months, some I've never talked to before, and some from other fandoms. They reached out to share their thoughts and feelings, and I appreciate it so much. I felt less alone. I felt a sense of solidarity, a sisterhood. Many agreed with me and it was touching but even more touching were the people who didn't necessarily agree with me and still wanted to hear what I had to say.

Perhaps it's patronizing but I feel like right now the best I can do is stay connected and go through this together. If I can help others, through informing, making someone smile, or supporting emotionally, it's all worth it.

#musings

[wolfpawn]

I Hate You, I Love You, Chapter 165

Chapter Summary -Tom and Danielle go to Suffolk for their second anniversary as a couple. While there, Tom realises that Danielle has already gotten started on some of the wedding plans which results in them setting a date.

Previous Chapter

Rating - Mature (some chapters contain smut)

Triggers - references to Tom Hiddleston’s work with the #MeToo Movement. That chapter will be tagged accordingly.

authors Note - I have been working on this for the last 3 years, it is currently 180+ chapters long.  This will be updated daily, so long as I can get time to do so, obviously.

Copyright for the photo is the owners, not mine. All image rights belong to their owners

tags: @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog​ @jessibelle-nerdy-mum​ @nonsensicalobsessions​ @damalseer​ @hiddlesbitch1​ @winterisakiller​ @fairlightswiftly​ @salempoe​ @wolfsmom1​ @black-ninja-blade​

Danielle bit her lips together as she felt herself reach her peak, forcing herself to not grip Tom’s hair too tightly as he made her feel so good. She gasped as the final waves of her orgasm were joined by a kiss that was given to her core before Tom crawled over her body, smiling cheekily as he came face to face with her. “I love you,” She smiled, feeling worn from their activities. “As I love you, my beautiful Elle.” He leant down and kissed her, not overly surprised when she leant up and deepened the kiss. “You are well and truly back to form,” He smirked as he forced their lips apart for a moment.

“Three times since we got here, that’s not bad by any accounts,” Danielle agreed.

They had decided to spend their second anniversary in Suffolk, away from the crowds of London and spending time with Diana. Tom brought Danielle for a lovely meal in Manzoni’s, the restaurant that led to the awkward first kiss of theirs and afterwards, insisted on kissing her on the doorstep, though this time, the kiss did not end there and he ensured she had an incredibly pleasurable evening after. Of late, after recovering from her Ironman, Danielle’s libido seemed to go back to her pre-training and pre-maternal urge norm, much to hers and indeed Tom’s delight.

The next morning led to slight bouts of sloth on their behalf before amourous attentions once more, leading them to almost lunchtime before they forcibly extracted themselves from the bed.

They were drinking tea as their porridge cooked when Diana knocked on the back door and entered. “Finally up, I see.” “We are embracing the holiday feeling,” Tom smirked back, going to the pot of tea they had decided would be a better idea to make and poured her a cup.

“How was Manzoni’s?” “That new chef you mentioned was working, you’re right, it’s even better now, somehow,” Danielle commented from the cooker.

“He is good, isn’t he?” Diana smiled. “So, have you two started talking properly yet?” Tom chuckled at his mother. “Are you just here to badger us about it?” “The sooner you plan it, the sooner it is planned.”

“You sound like Danielle when she is talking about her safety stuff.” Tom eyed his fiance warily as he said that. She gave him a warning glance with a slight smirk with it.

“And?” “We have decided on Ireland, in Elle’s parish church from her childhood. She explained it holds a really important place in her family and it is small and quaint and away from prying eyes. It will be lovely, so it makes a lot of sense.”

“How small?” “The maximum capacity is about a hundred plus people, nothing extravagant,” Danielle explained. “Doing approximate numbers for the church part of things, we are looking at around thirty under capacity but that’s good because we know we’re forgetting a few people.”

“Right, names are important, have you a list started?” “No,” Tom looked awkwardly.

Danielle left the room for a moment before returning with the backpack she had received for her Ironman, taking out a notepad she had in it. “I have all of my side and friends done. I have started your side too, but I know there is an aunt or uncle somewhere missing because the numbers aren’t right and I would wager you have a friend from school you will think to invite.”

Tom looked at her shocked at the organisation she had clearly put into the page of names, making notes who they were and of any conflicts, some may have, mostly referencing her aunt Bernie. “I...I was going to say I’m surprised, but no, how could I be, this is you through and through.

Danielle laughed at him. “I also took note that we will have to arrange buses from the airports and spoke to the local B&B, they will book out the dates of our choosing for us, if we give them a date soon, so I also called the parish office and got the dates the church is free on the timeline we are looking at, so we have to arrange that. I think we will have to go over a week or two in advance to ready the last of everything and for the marriage course, of course. Though, I booked that and flights for January, that gives time for your other commitments, Ace Con and whatnot.” She explained.

Tom simply stared at her in shock. He had asked had she looked into one or two things, thinking that perhaps she would begin preparation, he had not thought for one second she would be so thorough so quickly. “I...I feel somewhat unprepared in all of this.” “Course, what course?” Diana asked curiously.

“In Ireland, I am not sure if it is the same here, if you want to marry in a Catholic Church, you have to do a marriage course with Accord, it’s like this religious church-related family service, so I booked that. It’s nothing really, just preparing you for down the road, times of trouble, if you want kids, the usual marriage stuff. It’s more a box-ticking exercise really, though if you haven’t talked about this stuff before now or you haven’t had bad patches, are you really ready for marriage?” Danielle questioned.

“I think they are becoming something here, not obligatory, mind.”

“Well, they are at home and with our schedules, I thought it a good idea to plan it for then.” “What is on the cards to say you are both busy for that?” Diana asked curiously, always eager to know what her children were doing workwise. “I have a few things I will be involved in, going a few places, nothing too long, quick stops around Europe,” Danielle informed her. “Usually three to five day things and paperwork in between. And a trip to the US for a meeting or two, obviously.”

Diana nodded, knowing that there would be some form of plan such as this already before looking to her son. “I am doing a stint in one of Harold Pinter’s plays in London, Betrayal, as the name suggests, it is not the most cheerful of work but an interesting piece,” He explained.

“And are you the betrayer or the betrayed?” She asked curiously.

“I play the poor betrayed husband,” Tom pouted as he spoke.

“So plenty of confused and angry fans after this,” Danielle joked.

“I am glad you enjoy my torture.” Danielle stuck her tongue out at him playfully, causing him to chuckle. “I guess we better book a date so while we have a chance.”

“I guess we should.” A thought occurred to Tom. “What about that B&B?” “What do you mean?” “Well, they will have the dates.”

“Tom, I warned you before, Irish people are not the least bit bothered by this sort of thing and there’s not a snowball’s chance in hell that a local run B&B from my hometown, with kids that went to school with me, who have used my dad’s vet practice since before I was born are going to give my wedding dates to some foreign shites trying to make money off us.”

“You are putting a lot of faith in people that you have not known really for at least a decade,” Tom warned, having had more than one person he thought he could trust show that his trust had been poorly placed in the past.

“It’s a way of life in Connemara and indeed most of the non-city areas of Ireland. You say nothing and deny all knowledge of other people’s business to non-locals, as I said it's a local family business and if they can't look after the locals, well, Ireland is the place that coined the phrase ‘boycott’. It's one thing to talk among ourselves but to outsiders, that's just not done.”

“So, you would threaten them?”

“Ironically, it would not be me or putting them as I don't live there anymore, it will be those local people that they call their friends, the local GAA people, the lads that went to the pub with my dad, the women that went to the dances with Mam. It’s just an unwritten rule you don't embarrass yourself or your family and you definitely do not bring a bad name to the parish. Whatever about the generation I'm from but my dad's generation, Mr O'Leary and his wife, they never would risk her name or insult their family in such a manner,” Danielle explained. “Sometimes the anonymity of the city has its advantages though, growing up we always knew what our neighbours were doing but at the same time we were always there for one another when it was needed.”

“Will they have a problem with those coming from England for it?” Tom asked.

“Why would they? We're bringing them paying customers, we’re not there to bother anyone. We don't automatically just decide to hate all British people, that's not an economically sound practice. We are just mildly suspicious as a default setting which is healthy really, all things considered.”

Tom knew before he even saw her face that Danielle was sticking out her tongue at her own playful comment. “Behave,” He warned her, his own playful smile evident. “What dates are available? The sooner I tell Luke the better.” Danielle went to the page where she had put all of the information the parish secretary has provided her with. Tom studied the dates as well as taking out his phone and checking the calendar and within 40 seconds, he placed an ‘X’ beside three of the dates.

“Are they the ones that are acceptable or are they ‘the never gonna happen’ dates?” Danielle asked curiously as she looked at the dates he had put the “x's” next to, all three were not dates that she could think of for particular reasons as being an issue.

“The latter.”

“Okay,  so we work off the rest.”

“What about you, are you available every one of these dates?” Tom asked, doubtful that Danielle could be free for the entirety of the summer.

“The ones I was not available for, which were two dates, I didn't even write down. One is the all branch AGM, and the other is my mother’s anniversary. I know she would want me to get married but I could probably pretty much guarantee that she would not appreciate me doing so on her anniversary.” “No, that goes without saying,” Tom agreed. He looked over the dates a little bit more, Danielle noticed that he checked his phone for a moment before putting an ‘X’ beside another date. As soon as she looked at it she realised which date it was, she laughed. Tom looked at her worried as to a reaction. Seeing her laugh, he decided to check verbally. “You don't mind?”

“Not at all. I don't think it bodes well to take one of your favourite days of sport in the year from you,” She laughed. “And it's the height of the GAA season, so I can guarantee there won't be a single pub, hotel bar or restaurant that will be showing that over whatever GAA fixture is on for the day.” She tussles hair as she spoke.

Tom took her hand and put it to his lips, kissing it gently at her respect for his favourite sports day. “If it was the only viable day?”

“You said it does not suit you and there are six other days that are free and available, it's a non-issue.” She looked at the dates again. “If we choose the date before that takes place, I would assume, unless we go on a honeymoon of six days, that does not suit either. So how about, this one?” She pointed to the weekend after the final. “That way you can watch it or go and we can be to Ireland after?” “But you said you want to come over a fortnight in advance?” “I’m sure you can slip away for a weekend.”

“No, it's too close and I'm not leaving everything to you.” Tom looked at the dates that came after if he was honest, he thought them too far away. So instead, he looked at the only other available date before. “How about the June date?” Danielle looked at the piece of paper for a moment. “That’s only eight months away. Jesus, that's a terrifying thought. Has it really been 3 months since you asked me?”

“Time flies when you're having fun.” Tom beamed. “If it's too close then that's fine.” “No, let's go with that one.” Tom looked up at her. “Elle, if you want to take time to think about it.” Danielle’s response was not to argue but to instead to take out her phone, scroll through the contacts and bring up the number she needed. “I think June to be the best.” She showed him the number she was about to ring and when he gave a small nod she pressed the call button.

It only took three minutes between the secretary answering the phone and Danielle pressing the end call button. “It’s official, we are booked for June.” Danielle looked at Tom, who seemed somewhat shocked. “Second thoughts already?” “No, I just...In eight months, we’ll be…” Tom could barely compute what was happening. After all his planning, with all his thoughts on it, there was a date set to legally marry Danielle. It was almost unfathomable. “I can’t believe we have a date set.” He rose to his feet and leant in and kissed her. “Eight months will be an incredibly long and yet short time.” “With work, with plays and meetings, sets and meet and greets, we won’t see it pass by. It is strange to think, but by the time we book a reception, hotels and whatnot, by the time Emma and Jack organise a passport for Lucy and everything, eight months is nothing.” Tom frowned. “I thought you don’t need a passport to go to Ireland. I used my driving licence one weekend to get into Dublin for High Rise.” “You don’t under the Common Travel Area and all that but come Brexit, who knows, they already applied, just in case.” “I guess we will all need to be sure.” Diana took note to check her own when she went back to her own house. She beamed proudly at having urged her son and her future daughter-in-law into actually setting a date. “I will leave you to eat and do a few things. Don’t forget to book a venue next.” She instructed as she left.

With quick goodbyes, Danielle started thinking. “I genuinely cannot think of too many. I suppose if you want to be fancy, there is always Kylemore Abbey?”

Tom Googled the place and his brows rose. “It’s beautiful.” “Of course it is, it’s in Connemara, we don’t do things by halves.” She smiled, looking at the picture in front of them of the building. “It is only from the 1860s but it is beautiful, nonetheless.” “And they take weddings?” “For the right price, they will be more than happy to facilitate whatever we ask. The question becomes, are we willing to pay such prices?” Tom suspected that there would be a chance that Danielle would have an issue with such things. He had considered how to approach it but now was the best time. “Elle, Darling, I m not sure how often you are planning on doing this but I am very much only considering the once so we will do this right.”

“I just don’t want to waste money.” “Is it wasting it for us to have a lovely wedding day?” “It’s one day, I don’t…” Danielle inhaled deeply. Her fiance was a renowned actor and she knew that came with more money than sense. “Just nothing too insane.” “Elle, don’t force yourself into budgets. We are not going to do anything mad, even the ring is a family heirloom, we are not extravagant spenders, so if the hotel costs a bit, then fine. I doubt you plan on some mad dress.”

Danielle scoffed, “Valentino, Darling,” She impersonated the accentuated Cruella De Vil accent as she spoke. “Just a hundred thousand.”

Tom chuckled and shook his head. “If you wanted.” Danielle stared at him in horror. “Are you insane?”

“I just want you to be happy.” “Tom, here and now, I m saying this. This whole thing is not going to come within an ass’s roar of that sort of money. No, not happening. I will call it off it does.” “Looks like I found the ‘Get out of Jail Free’ Card.” Tom jested, rushing out of her reach before she could nudge him in retaliation. When she went over to him, he pulled her in against him. “How did I manage to find you, a sensible, beautiful, intelligent woman like you?”

“A sacrifice to an old God or two, I think.”

“Very possible.” He leant down and kissed her, wanting her to feel how intensely he loved her from it.

Pictures of Kylemore Abbey for reference

#I Hate You I Love You #Chapter 165 #tom hiddleston fic #tom hiddleston #wolfpawn

[thecoleopterawithana]

Hello, I'm the last anon you answered to. I'm sorry if I came out as defensive because it wasn't my intention. In fact I've always thought that John was bisexual until I started questioning everything. ( I'm a bisexual guy myself and I'm perfectly happy with the way I am ! ) It's just that I feel like Yoko would just say whatever she wants on John to suit her agenda. John's sexuality had always been an interesting topic and dropping something like that would gaib her publicity this is why I --

I question the authenticity of her claims. She could have lied about it just to attract attention… And I’d be disappointed because John was in fact my idol and he gave me the strength to come out as bi to my family. But there’s so many anecdotes about him being homophobic that it just makes me sad and this is why I hardly doubt that he was a bisexual man…As for the Cynthia quote I heard her say something like “ John was afraid of homosexuality just like everyone ) in a video on Youtube –

I am very conflicted because I’ve watched videos of John ( interviews etc ) and many comments said that he was very skilled at manipulating people and wasn’t as honest as he appeared to be, which is why I doubt. John had always been the rebellious type and I started thinking that he was using the bisexuality topic to shock and make people talk about it which is disappointing. Was he dropping hints that he was bi to piss off people and make publicity ? This is what I believe : (There is also -

Something he said to Alaister Taylor where he said that he was trying to spread the rumor that he was gay or bi just for fun and he told him that he would never shag a man because just the thought of it turned him off… Yet he also told him that he adored Brian so much that he would have done anything with him ( he contradict himself here. ) So yeah I didn’t want to be rude. I apologize. I think I need reassurance. Could you please analyse everything I said if u don’t mind please ? : (

-

Anon 2

At the very least all these years later isn’t it circumstantially suggested that John had very private gay encounters, and was uncomfortable making them public, yet wanted to hint at them so he could deal with this matter int he future? He was protecting his privacy and his ego, and perhaps wasn’t yet ready to reveal either his encounters or mixed feelings of bisexuality. His encounters have been protected by those with whom he was involved, people thameant a lot to him, no?

-

Anon 3

hey! by any chance, do you have knowledge of the quotes where john said “sex with girls felt like a performance after the first time” and “i was never sexually attracted to women before yoko”? i am SURE i’ve seen the first one somewhere on tumblr, though the second one is more of a quote of a quote so i’m not sure if it’s real or not dfkdjk thanks, anyway!

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Anon 4

Hello! Is it true that John used to be very attracted to the drag scene in St Pauli ( I guess that was the town I read about ) and that basically the drag / gay scene made him feel comfortable and at home? Says a lot about him!

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@tbhmarjj

I adore you, thank u for this blog and ur beautiful mind. i doubt johns bisexuality at times tbh considering he went to great lengths for publicity and he wanted to be an LGBT ally, be cool and outspoken and as he himself said it was trendy to be bi. but then again he was obsessed with Paul in so many ways and he was the embodiment of John’s ideal man. beautiful, talented, intellectual. I’ll be patiently awaiting ur posts exploring Paul’s views on johns sexuality.Thank u

-

Hello again, anon! 

I want to begin by thanking you for getting back to me after I answered your ask and for clarifying where you were coming from when you wrote it. It really is quite hard to fully get the tone of a written message, especially one that is so short that you have no context to draw from to get the emotional meaning behind it. It really appeared to me when I read it that the concern was not who was saying it (Yoko) but about what was being said (John was bisexual). I can now see that was not the case and I appreciate that you’ve made that clear. 

I also hope you don’t mind, but I’ve taken the opportunity to include in this answer all of the other asks I’ve been receiving regarding John’s sexuality. It’s clearly a topic of great interest in this community. So I’ll be attempting to address all the points raised here. Again, this is nothing definitive; only my personal readings of the situation as I find it at the moment.

Before I do answer, though, I’d just like everyone to take a deep breath and a step back. Let’s try to examine this topic a bit more objectively. 

I understand that sex is kind of major in our society. Our notion of identity is tightly bound to our classified sexuality and gender. Sexual relationships (or amorous relationships) are seen as the epitome of human connection and the ideal everyone should be striving for. And people fundamentally want to be loved and not alone, so it makes sense that figuring out who is a potential companion (and if that companion is interested back) is such a big deal.

But despite these layers of meaning and societal pressures, we should keep in mind what sex represents, essentially, from an evolutionary point of view. 

For social animals who derive pleasure from sexual stimulation, sexual intercourse is – like all the other kinds of affection – a way to build connections. 

If you want to find examples in nature, just look at our ape cousins, the bonobos. The also called pygmy chimpanzee lives in a matriarchal society where sexual behaviour plays an essential role in strengthening social bonds, lowering tension and keeping the peace. Bonobos don’t discriminate between gender or age (except between mothers copulating with their own adult sons, so as to prevent cross-breeding). It’s the true “free love” society; evolution took “make love, not war” and ran with it. 

Our own culture seems more similar to that of bonobos’ northern neighbours, the common chimp. Their patriarchy is more conservative regarding sexual intercourse, which is mainly used for reproduction purposes, and their power structure is based around intricate political games, where males form alliances and try to get public support in order to overthrow the ruling party.

I find it endlessly curious to look at these two species, whose physical separation by the Congo river made them diverge so starkly in their social organization, and compare them to the struggle between these same two natures that we find in our own society. 

All this to say that, from a simply biological point of view, I have to agree with John and Yoko when they say that everyone must be bisexual. If sexual intercourse as a social behaviour is, inherently, all about establishing bonds and connections, the extent to which those connections are “allowed” to be built depends entirely on the hierarchal structure that same society is trying to preserve. In other words, what is classified as morally right or wrong is more reflective of the rules in place to keep that society working as it is, than it is of what is naturally present as a drive. 

If your brain is primed to seek pleasure and sexual intercourse brings you pleasure independently of the partner’s gender, then the partner’s gender should be inconsequential.

But unlike bonobos, humans are kind of touchy about touching. So there are other levels of information influencing behaviour. The processes of socialization – of internalizing the norms and ideologies of society – and enculturation – by which people learn the dynamics of their surrounding culture and acquire values and norms appropriate or necessary in that culture and worldviews – are as determinant as the genetic factors influencing behaviour. In fact, this added education can be so effective in curbing your “primal instincts”, that one might forget they have them in the first place. 

Thus, the concepts of gender identity and sexual orientation are a constantly shifting construct based on the various interactions between your genetic makeup and social influences. 

I just think that, in order to have this discussion, it’s important to separate the various levels of it and be clear about which we are referring to.

There is the basic evolutionary drive to seek pleasure and form connections.

There is the social education about that same drive and how it is allowed to manifest itself.

And integrating all these different signals and information – various potentials which manifested as attraction – there finally is a behaviour, a choice.

And finally, there’s the external point of view of other members of society looking in and trying to discern other people’s drives and how they relate to their choices (that’s us now). The problem is, we often throw our own drives and choices into the mix, especially with regards to something as personally defining as sexual orientation. 

So we have to make very clear in our minds what is the end goal here. Why are we interested in discussing this topic? Are we looking to discern as much of the truth as we can get it, objectively trying to understand these human beings? Or are we trying to confirm our own projections on them? And please, don’t take me wrong. All these are valid reasons to be interested in a subject. Often how it resonates with us, so personally, is vitally important to reaching a greater understanding about ourselves and learning how to communicate that to others. 

But in the same way a piece of music can make you have a transformative emotional experience that the artist didn’t necessarily go through, it’s important to remember that our own inner-life might be affecting how we examine others. Better be mindful of what we project, lest we think are finally seeing inside another person when in fact we are only looking at our own reflection. (And honestly, I believe getting to truly know ourselves in this processes can be a hundred times more valuable than knowing the other. By learning to recognize ourselves we can better understand other people and vice-versa.) 

So if it is important to you that John is bisexual, my honest opinion is that all the information can be read in a way that confirms it. We’ll hardly ever know for sure, and based on what we do know, that can certainly be the takeaway. 

But if we want to objectively examine John’s sexuality, we shouldn’t bring in a confirmation bias. Meaning that we should be emotionally detached from the outcome, as long as it is as close to the truth as we can get. But this is only where I’m coming from, and I’m a bit of a scientist. It’s totally fair if you’re not in it for the same reasons. Though again, working under the assumption that you want to know my stance on it, let’s proceed.

I understand your reservations regarding Yoko as an unreliable narrator. To analyse Yoko’s motivations would be an interesting topic, but one which I will not go in at the moment as I don’t feel sufficiently informed about Yoko as a person to give an extensive examination.  

But in my opinion, there is a whole lot of other information available from which to draw from other than Yoko’s statements. 

I also get your and @tbhmarjj‘s concerns about John’s declarations during the 70s. But it’s the same question I posed in the previous post: Was the “bisexual chic” fad of the 1970s merely a publicity stunt for those involved? Even if it was, did it make the experimentations undertaken any less true? Were they just faking it for the press or were they finally allowed to try and be open about it? 

Because I come from the biological background that places sex as a positive social interaction like any other, meaning that its purpose is to create bonds and the pleasure is our “reward” for doing it, I tend to believe that the behaviours were genuine. The drive there is real. As real as the internal constraints that would act on them as a result of societies shifting expectations and permissions. And this socialization is as determinant in the creation of sexual attraction as anything. So based on our definition of sexual orientation, all those bi rockstars of the 70s could have effectively stopped identifying as bi once the new social norm overrun their own internal drives and the previous less conservative status quo. That didn’t make them less bi when they were. 

It’s funny, but in terms of gender and sexuality, nothing is real so everything is. 

So yeah, I think that John could have been bisexual the second he felt he was. But because the social tide was likely to shift, it was better to also maintain a measure of deniability: it was just for show, it’s not serious, I was just taking the mickey out of you and you fell for it! Of course John was smart enough to leave space there to retract. He and Paul had mastered the art as communicators through song. They could claim them to mean everything and nothing as it suited them. As Anon 2 says, it’s a protective measure. 

So I think that at some point in time, John genuinely identified as bisexual. Now whether he acted on it or not is another questioned entirely. As Anon 2 points out, there are various circumstantial accounts, but these are always tougher to verify. 

I tend to believe Yoko when she says:

So did Lennon ever have sex with men?

“No, I don’t think so,” says Ono. “The beginning of the year he was killed, he said to me, ‘I could have done it, but I can’t because I just never found somebody that was that attractive.’ Both John and I were into attractiveness—you know—beauty.”

I ask what she makes of the people outside the building, the crowds still at Strawberry Fields.

Ono misunderstands, or mishears (or is simply focused on the last strand of our conversation), and continues to talk about sex.

“I don’t make anything out of it. When you’re not really interested in that sort of sex, you don’t think about it. Both John and I surprisingly were very passive people. Unless somebody made a thing out of it, if they made a move, I wouldn’t even think about it.”

— in Yoko Ono: I Still Fear John’s Killer by Tim Teeman for the Daily Beast (13 October 2015).

At least I believe he at least never “fully” did it, in the sense of full-blown anal sex. I think there might have been “milder” homosexual interactions, such as handjobs, that could be rationalized as not entirely gay (the thing with Brian in Spain being one of them.)

Regarding the drag scene in Hamburg Anon 4 was asking about, I agree that it also provides information about John. Though I think it’s mainly about his gender identity rather than his sexual orientation (though the two are invariably linked in the construct as well).

Here are some quotes about it:

With his four months’ greater experience, Sheridan was an ideal guide to the Reeperbahn’s more exotic diversions, like the Schwülen laden. Stu Sutcliffe later wrote home in amazement that the transvestites were ‘all harmless and very young’ and it was actually possible to speak to one ‘without shuddering’. Though raised amid the same homophobia as his companions, John seemed totally unshocked by St Pauli’s abundant drag scene; indeed, he often seemed actively to seek it out. ‘There was one particular club he used to like,’ Tony Sheridan remembers, ‘full of these big guys with hairy hands, deep voices—and breasts. But they used to make an effort to talk English. There was something about the place that seemed to make John feel at home.’

— In John Lennon: The Life by Philip Norman (2008).

And according to Horst Fascher (bouncer at the Indra Club and the Kaiserkeller):

It wasn’t just girls that were on offer to young english rockers. Monica’s Bar was Hamburg’s notorious transvestite club. For one or two English musicians, Monica’s was just another part of the Hamburg experience.

HORST FASCHER: One night Monica said, “Come, come and look. One of your boys is in the séparé.” “And who is it?” And she said, “One of the Beatles.” “Let me look”. She said, “Be careful. Look only sneaky-like.” But I did. I grabbed the curtain, pulled it aside and there was sitting John in… in a position with that girl, and you know. He felt really ashamed and I said, “John, don’t worry man. I did that all before.”

— In The Beatles Biggest Secrets. [Transcription is my own and I’m not too certain of it.]

Though there certainly might have been an aspect of sexual interest to it, I think John’s fascination with the drag scene was also the kinship with the queerness he felt inside himself; mainly in regards to him wanting to express his more sensitive side, which is coded as feminine in our society. So I think seeing men indulging in femininity and nonnormative behaviour resonated with him.

Also, I think it’s even more important to understand John’s relationship with sex in general, regardless of the partner. 

To that end, the quote mentioned by Anon 3 is of special relevance:

When I was a kid, I wanted to shag every attractive woman I saw. I used to dream that it would be great if you could just click your fingers and they would strip off and be ready for me. I would spend most of my teenager years fantasising about having this kind of power over women. The weird thing is, when the fantasies came true they were not nearly so much fun. One of my most frequent dreams was seducing two girls together, or even a mother and a daughter. That happened in Hamburg a couple of times and the first time it was sensational. The second time it got to feel like I was giving a performance. You know how when you make love to a woman that the moment you come, you get a buzz of relief and just for a moment you don’t need anyone or anything. The more women I had, the more the buzz would turn into a horrible feeling of rejection and revulsion at what I’d been doing. As soon as I’d been with a woman, I wanted to get the hell out.

— John Lennon to Alistair Taylor (Brian Epstein’s assistant), 1965. In his autobiography With the Beatles: A Stunning Insight by The Man who was with the Band Every Step of the Way (2003).

And another important passage is in reference to Janov’s Primal Scream Therapy:

Well, his thing is to feel the pain that’s accumulated inside you ever since your childhood. […] The worst pain is that of not being wanted, of realising your parents do not need you in the way you need them. When I was a child I experienced moments of not wanting to see the ugliness, not wanting to see not being wanted. This lack of love went into my eyes and into my mind. […] Most people channel their pain into God or masturbation or some dream of making it. […] But for me at any rate it was all part of dissolving the Godtrip or father-figure trip. Facing up to reality instead of always looking for some kind of heaven.

— John Lennon, interviewed by Robin Blackburn and Tariq Ali for Red Mole (8-22 March 1971). [I really can’t stop pointing to this quote as one of the most important in order to understand John Lennon.]

As he reiterates in ‘I Found Out’ (1970): Some of you sitting there with yer cock in yer hand / Don’t get you nowhere don’t make you a man

To me, John’s pursuit of sex is, like most things in his life, essentially about filling this black-hole of emotional pain. He internalized the lack of love from his parents, which went into his eyes and mind, until he himself believed he was unlovable. This lack of self-esteem translates into a lot of pain and the need for an external solution for that pain. 

The external solution is not wanting to feel so vulnerable any more. This can be achieved either by trying to seize control, by exerting it over others or having them look up to you (e.g. “fantasising about having this kind of power over women”; “some dream of making it”). Or it can be achieved by handing control over and being taken care of (e.g. “people channel their pain into God”, “I’ve seen religion from Jesus to Paul”.)

Sex as an activity can play into these various dynamics: it can be used to feel power over others, as John started out; it can be used as an escapist distraction, like a drug (e.g. “you get a buzz of relief and just for a moment you don’t need anyone or anything”); and it can be used as giving yourself over and being loved, looking to receive that which you can’t get from yourself. 

As time passed and the first two solutions stopped working, I think John focused on the third: sex in the context of an emotionally close relationship as the ultimate intimacy and proof that he was loved. And because he wanted to absolve himself of responsibility, to be taken care of, his partner needed to be someone on the other end, someone who had control. In our culture, this reads as a masculine figure (e.g. “father-figure trip”). 

This may be from a female, whose masculine qualities were what attracted John in the first place:

In this intense, intimate and revealing original cassette recording of a private conversation in 1969 between John Lennon and Yoko Ono, the couple speaks primarily about Yoko’s past relationships, her music and art, and their random views on sex, love, promiscuity, and homosexuality. […] [Lennon] adds that he had never met an attractive woman that had sexually aroused him to any great degree.

— Description of the 45-minute audiotape auctioned in 2009 by Alexander Autographs.

I used to say to him, ‘I think you’re a closet fag, you know.’ Because after we started to live together, John would say to me, ‘Do you know why I like you? Because you look like a bloke in drag. You’re like a mate.’

— Yoko Ono, interviewed for New York Magazine (25 May 1981).

Or the partner he was looking for could be found in the (often dominant) person he was most emotionally invested in his whole life. 

All I want is you / Everything has got to be just like you want it to

And in a society that establishes that the closest two people can be, the greatest intimacy they can share, the ultimate declaration of love is to live in a monogamous amorous relationship, is it any wonder that John felt he could only believe in their relationship if they were together like that? Is it any wonder that he would doubt Paul’s affections because Paul apparently wasn’t willing to express them like that? 

JOHN: It’s a plus, it’s not a minus. The plus is that your best friend, also, can hold you without… I mean, I’m not a homosexual, or we could have had a homosexual relationship and maybe that would have satisfied it, with working with other male artists. [faltering] An artist – it’s more – it’s much better to be working with another artist of the same energy, and that’s why there’s always been Beatles or Marx Brothers or men, together. Because it’s alright for them to work together or whatever it is. It’s the same except that we sleep together, you know? I mean, not counting love and all the things on the side, just as a working relationship with her, it has all the benefits of working with another male artist and all the joint inspiration, and then we can hold hands too, right?

SHEVEY: But Yoko is a very independent person. Isn’t it— [inaudible]

JOHN: Sure, and so were the men I worked with. The only difference is she’s female.

SHEVEY: But you didn’t find it difficult to make that transition?

JOHN: Oh yeah. I mean, it took me four years. I’m still not – I’m still only coming through it, you know.

— Interview with Sandra Shevey (June 1972).

I know I keep posting this quote, but I don’t think he can make it more obvious than that: it’s not about the sex. Or rather, the sex is not the primary thing. 

He didn’t push all those years because he was uncontrollably horny for Paul. John just wants a physical manifestation, a more tangible “proof”, of his emotional connections. He wants to be able to hold hands, be held and perhaps also have sex with his best friend; he needs those proofs of love through the means of physical affection because he won’t believe Paul’s love for him is there otherwise (or that it’s as great as John’s).

Would society normalizing other kinds of relationships – such as friendships – to be as important or on the same level as amorous (romantic/sexual) ones, have helped John and Paul? Most likely. 

Would society normalizing same-sex amorous relationships have helped John and Paul? Perhaps. (For this one we would have to look more closely at Paul’s needs and desires.)

All this to say that John’s idea of sexuality was extremely influenced by society, and in his case, the rule “amorous relationships are the normative ones” outweighed the “heterosexual relationships are the normative ones”. 

The conflict occurred when from Paul’s perspective, the priority of the rules was the other way around. I think Paul was ready to ignore society’s norm and live his life with his friendship with John as the most important relationship. But he also wanted a heterosexual one. (But more on that on a post of its own.)

For now, I hope I have more or less managed to express my thoughts on the matter of John’s sexuality. 

Thank you so much for reading through all that and for reaching out in the first place! I truly appreciate it!

#John Lennon #paul mccartney #yoko ono #the beatles #asks me why #I'm not a homosexual or we could have had a homosexual relationship #he could be a real soft sweetie #paul is a concept by which we measure our pain #touching is good #and when i touch you i feel happy inside #the person I actually picked as my partner #johnny #macca #alistair taylor #Brian Epstein #Tony Sheridan #Horst Fascher #meta #my stuff

[the-archlich]

Went back to read some of the old spotlights (thank you btw for all the amazing work you put in it’s the only way tumblr blog I’ve read consistently the past few years), in regards to Guanqiu Jian- how much validity do you think the points in the edict he made were against Sima Shi? For a long time military commander who served in countless battles, he would have had to know his rebellion was going to be a suicide pact without a massive army. Just seems like a terrible error of judgment.

Oh god. Old spotlights. Sorry about those. Y’all deserved better quality articles. But moving on...

On the one hand, it was a very political document, phrased very carefully. All of the criticism is leveled at Sima Shi specifically, sandwiched between effusive praise of other members of his family. It’s possible he hoped to convince Sima Shi’s own family to turn against him. Guanqiu Jian may have even been benevolent enough to spare the rest of the family if they did, although it’s hard to imagine any of the Sima would credit that.

Guanqiu Jian was probably thinking the same thing most rebels are. That when he raised his flag and started to march against the evil usurper, others would join him. But history (even his recent history) shows that’s too idealistic. Just look at how many people were content to sit back and let Dong Zhuo do whatever. Most people find it easier to live under a tyrant than fight one.

As for the accusations themselves:

Now Sima Shi, an official in the prime of his life, feigns ill health while he has no real disease, yet has strong troops under his command; he does not serve the sovereign as is proper to a subject. The court officials criticize him and men of principle jeer at him. It is something of which the whole Empire is aware. This is his first crime.

This, I think, is false. We know that Sima Shi did indeed have a major disease that required ocular surgery. And beyond that I don’t think his reluctance to personally lead armies is really a fault. But it was a marked contrast to his father, and no doubt it offended the soldiers.

In preparing to attack the rebels, Sima Yi would have grain for the army unhusked in large quantities and set definite dates for launching his attacks. Sima Shi, as a high official of the State, ought to eliminate the national calamity (i.e. Wu and Shu); as a son he ought to bring his father's work to completion. But he ceased mourning for his father, and had all his work stopped. As a subject, he is disloyal; as a son, he is unfilial. This is his second crime.

Again, I don’t think this one is a fair criticism. There was a long precedent for ending mourning rituals early, and aggressive campaigns against Wu and Shu were always a risky proposition. This is another charge that I think was intended mostly to alienate Sima Shi from the soldiers.

While the rebels withdrew to Dongguan, he mobilized the troops; the three (jiangjun with the word) zheng (in their titles) advanced simultaneously. But our troops were lost and our army defeated; the military preparations of many years went to ruin in one day, so that the rebels were induced to come. The Empire fell into disorder, the people suffered from death and injury, or wandered homeless. This is his third crime.

Here, Guanqiu Jian criticises Sima Shi for Wei’s losses in February 253; most notably the defeat at Lake Chao; and for Zhuge Ke’s retaliatory invasion. Guanqiu Jian himself fought on that campaign, and the losses at Lake Chao forced him to quit the field without achievement. This is actually a fair criticism. Others, notably Fu Jian, had objected to the campaign in the first place. As its architect, Sima Shi does deserve his share of the blame.

The rebels mobilized the entire forces of their State, and with five hundred thousand men, as they claimed, they advanced towards Shouchun intending to proceed to Luoyang. It happened that we and the taiyu Sima Fu proposed the strategy of blockading key positions without crossing arms, and returning to strengthen the defense of Xincheng. The generals and troops in Huainan rushed against spears and trampled drawn swords, defending their positions day and night. They were engaged in this strenuous work for a hundred days, the dead strewn on the ground. Since its very beginning, the Wei army has never suffered a more severe hardship than this. Yet Sima Shi has arbitrarily made no proposal to enfeoff and reward the heroes in this campaign. Power was in his hands, but he did not use it to record the merits of these men. This is his fourth crime.

Guanqiu Jian is referring to the defense against Zhuge Ke in 253. While Jin Shu says that Sima Shi took command of the overall campaign, SGZ seems to disagree. Guanqiu Jian himself names Sima Fu as the commander, which agrees with other accounts. Guanqiu Jian claims that Sima Shi didn’t grant due rewards to those who earned glory during that great battle. This accusation is likely true, although a closer look at Cao Mao’s annals probably could solve that question.

The late zhongshuling Li Feng and others, considering that Sima Shi did not act as is proper to a subject, wanted to denounce and expel him. Knowing of this, Sima Shi invited Li Feng to come to him, and that evening struck him dead, carried off the corpse and buried the coffin. Li Feng and his associates were high officials and in the confidence of the sovereign. Yet he applied brutal measures to him on his own authority, killing him without first having charged him with a crime. Sima Shi did not respect the authority of his sovereign. This is his fifth crime.

Guanqiu Jian criticizes Sima Shi for executing Li Feng and his conspirators without any sort of due process. It’s a fair criticism. While that group was planning to kill him and some action had to be taken against them, Wei had formal structures for such an event. Sima Shi bypassing them entirely is worthy of criticism.

Sima Yi used to express his admiration of the Prince of Qi and would say that he was worthy of being a sovereign; he thus fixed the relationship between sovereign and subject. Having served as guardian for fifteen years, he wanted to hand the power of government to the Prince of Qi: He inspected arsenals and ordered the bodyguards not to leave their posts without permission. Knowing well his own wickedness and iniquities, which secured blessing neither from the spirits nor from men, Sima Shi dethroned his sovereign under a false command from the Empress Dowager, charging him with crimes. Sima Fu, a paternal uncle of Sima Shi, is by nature good and filial; when he bade farewell to the Prince of Qi, he could not control his grief; and the multitudinous officials were all angry at Sima Shi. But Sima Shi was insensitive and did not pay attention to the cardinal principle governing the relationship between a subject and his sovereign. This is his sixth crime.

This one speaks for itself. Guanqiu Jian is denouncing Sima Shi’s removal of Cao Fang under a forged or forced command from the Dowager. That definitely happened. Even if the details are a bit muddled by contradictory sources, Sima Shi certainly used his power to remove an inconvenient sovereign. This is probably the most significant charge Guanqiu Jian could point at him, and arguably the only one that matters.

Then again, the late guanglu dafu Zhang Qi was innocent of any crime, yet he put him, his wife, and his children to death. Even the mother of the State, the Empress, was affected: he pressed the August Person to send her away. At that time, all were grieved and astonished, there being none that did not lament. Yet Sima Shi called it felicitous and rejoiced. This is his seventh crime.

This, too, is related to the conspiracy with Li Feng, Xiahou Xuan, etc. Seems a little sloppy of Guanqiu Jian to put it here.

Since the accession to the throne, Your Majesty, intelligent and martial, has applied his mind to all matters; he wanted to economize and make things simple. The Whole Empire, hearing of this, rejoiced. Yet Sima Shi would not improve and repent, nor practice the due obligations of a subject; instead of doing this, he levied troops and brought havoc to the palace, the feudal lords taking their own protective measures. At the beginning of Your Majesty's accession to the throne, he did not appear at Court to pay homage. When Your Majesty wanted to visit him at Sima Shi's home to inquire after his ailments, he refused to admit you, thus disobeying the laws of the land. This is his eight crime.

This is discourtesy to the emperor. Certainly a capital offense, though I don’t know if we have any evidence of it beyond Guanqiu Jian’s words. Of course, given the circumstances under which Chen Shou’s records were written, there is reason to be a little cautious about what he might have omitted.

Recently the lingjun Xu Yun had been appointed zhenbei jiangjun. Because he had made a gift of government property, Sima Shi impeached and punished him. It is true that he was merely banished, but he killed him by making him starve on the road. Hearing of this, the whole Empire grieved. This is his ninth crime.

Guanqiu Jian criticizes Sima Shi for his treatment of a respected official Xu Yun. This is all accurate. He committed a minor crime and was dismissed, which (indirectly, as Guanqiu Jian admits) led to his death.

The defense of the three quarters had become deficient, but he selected picked troops in large numbers to serve as his guards; the troops in the Wuying had become deficient, yet he would not supplement their number. Arms and weapons he took in quantities for his own barracks. The whole Empire knows of it and every one resents it; rumors course through the highways of the land, and the Empire is suspicious. This is his tenth crime.

Guanqiu Jian charges Sima Shi with building up his personal guard and resources while neglecting the needs of the state. However it should be noted that Guanqiu Jian speaks in terms of rumors and things “everyone knows” so this charge might not be authentic.

By profusely granting leaves of absence to the troops, he would win praise and make the four quarters empty of troops. He monopolizes power in order to exult his vicious intentions. He drafts men for the military agricultural colonies; he distributes rewards and obstructs the military work. He dares to disturb the ancient laws: he has the various feudal princes and dukes assemble in Ye, his intention being to kill them all. On one day he started a coup d'etat and dethroned his sovereign. Since Heaven does not help the wicked, it made his eyes swell, so that his attempts were frustrated. This is his eleventh crime.

In this last charge Guanqiu Jian says first that Sima Shi is taking measures to make himself popular with the army at the expense of its effectiveness and proper conduct. That’s probably accurate. It also reiterates the criticism for removing Cao Fang, which is certainly fair. However Guanqiu Jian also accuses him of planning to kill all the various members of the Cao clan in Ye, which doesn’t seem to have ever been on the table. That part is probably rumor or slander.

So all in all, I’d say that the charges are more accurate than not. Sima Shi was absolutely guilty of the most serious accusations, even if others aren’t quite so straightforward as Guanqiu Jian suggests.

[actuallylorelaigilmore]

All The Days Ahead, Chapter 8: All Of The Words We Said, We Can't Take Back

Mal x Simon, Firefly. Jayne POV. Also on AO3. Ch 1-7 on my blog.

Jayne makes a listening noise and keeps walking, half of his attention on the people around them. Why any reasonable fella would want to get married in the first place is beyond him. He definitely never expected it of Mal.

A month after Mal is officially cleared from bedrest, Serenity is docked on Persephone while the crew scatters to gather supplies. Mal and Jayne are in the garment district, with its open air market tables and loud overlapping conversations. 

It’s not wholly clear to Jayne why the captain ordered him to come along on this errand--he ain’t much for fashion, nor wedding decorations. Mal would be better off with one of the women. His best guess is that Simon’s the one behind it, a way to offer Mal protection when he’s still weak. But he can’t ask, can he? The doc still isn't his biggest fan. So guessin’ is all he has.

“We’re looking for beads first,” Mal tells him. “The prayer kind, though we won’t be doing any prayin’ at my wedding, I’ve already had words with the preacher about that.”

Jayne makes a listening noise and keeps walking, half of his attention on the people around them. Why any reasonable fella would want to get married in the first place is beyond him. He definitely never expected it of Mal.

In hindsight--heh, hindsight, that right there’s a pun, Jayne realizes--he probably shoulda known the captain was sly long before Simon came onboard. Mal always did enjoy dressin’ up like womenfolk on the job a little too much. 

“How long is this gonna take, anyway?” Jayne asks. “Never feels safe spending too much time on Badger’s planet. Askin’ to get pinched.”

“It’s not Badger’s planet!” Mal retorts. “He only lives here. But I take your point, seeing as he got me shot and all. Once we handle my list, we’ll head back to the ship.”

“Shouldn’t take more’n a few hours,” Mal adds. “Rest of the crew ought to be back by then too--no reason to linger.”

“Good. So, prayer beads. Any particular color?”

“Simon didn’t say.” Mal frowns. “I guess, whatever’s classic under these circumstances.”

“Red and gold then. Or the kind made from wood.”

Mal stops walking to stare at Jayne.

“What?”

“Nothin.’ You just confound expectations at times.”

He’s feelin’ twitchy, an itch between his shoulderblades that usually means they’re being watched. In this crowd, he can’t tell if it’s true. “Just keep yourself focused while we’re strolling, would you? Don’t need nobody gettin’ shot again.”

“Hey,” Mal protests. “Mykan wasn’t my fault--I wasn’t distracted. I was a highly focused professional, scoping out the area just like you and Zoe.”

“Yeah, well, all I know is, Zoe and I didn’t end up shot. Maybe you and the doc should stay off jobs until after your honeymoon,” Jayne suggests. “Too busy grappling with him lately. Never used to get shot.”

“I’ve been shot lots of times!” Mal reconsiders that line of defense. “Not the point. I don’t need to take myself off the job, Jayne. I’m all healed, my mind’s as sharp as ever. Don’t know where you got the idea that I’d be addled anyhow, just ‘cause Simon and I are together.”

“Come on, Mal. Ev’rybody knows goin’ sly can make you soft. Got to watch--”

Jayne isn’t finished with his warning before Mal’s got his hands around his neck. Despite their history, it still surprises Jayne whenever the captain goes for whip-quick violence...probably because he’s more of a pistol duel kind of man. Honorable even when he shouldn’t be. 

“Hey! What’d I say?” Jayne chokes out, starting to turn red. Mal’s not actually trying to kill him--the hold he’s got on Jayne is more of a threat than a real attack--but that won’t stop him from passing out if it goes on much longer.

“Do I look soft to you?” Mal asks, his voice fearsome in its restraint. 

Passersby aren’t paying them much mind, though Jayne can see a pair of men across the market eyeing them. They look like scalpers, not likely to intervene even if Mal does strangle him.

“No,” Jayne says, trying to shake his head. “Wasn’t what I meant, Mal. You’re takin’ it all wrong.”

“What about Simon?” Mal asks, his anger more evident now. “You’ve been at the end of one of his blades, you moonbrained hwen dan. Think he’s soft too?”

“No. Dammit, Mal, lemme go.”

Jayne shakes off the choking feeling, rubbing his throat as Mal steps back. “Dunno why you’re taking things so personal these days. I was just tryin’ to say you and Simon both oughta be careful. Either of you die, what’ll happen to the rest of us?”

“Well, whatever you think of me, or of Simon, keep it to yourself,” Mal says. “I got no interest in your opinions on my sexual proclivities, ‘specially when they make you sound like a backberth never set foot off the rim.”

“Ain’t like I insulted you,” he protests. “Just fact. You and the doctor are coupled up.”

“That we are. And if you like facts so much, here’s another: you talk like that again about me or Simon, it’ll be your turn for a hilarious gunshot wound.” 

Mal rolls his shoulders and stalks off through the crowd, ready to pick up what they came for.

“Really didn’t mean it that way,” Jayne insists as he follows Mal through the crowd. Captain sure was tetchy lately; must be them wedding jitters people talk about. 

After a few minutes of silent walking,  Jayne puts a hand on Mal’s shoulder. He isn’t surprised when Mal shrugs it off, but it succeeds in getting his attention, which is the goal.

“Behind your left,” Jayne says under his breath, and Mal tenses, starts walking again. 

“Table up ahead,” Mal answers, and Jayne understands the shorthand for ‘play at being shoppers and see what happens next.’ 

He joins Mal at the display of prayer beads, his hand casually resting above his gun. “Well, are these gonna work for you okay, do y’think? I don’t rightly know what a wedding needs, to be honest.”

Mal relaxes as soon as he lays eyes on the men walking toward them. Jayne keeps his hand where it is, though, just in case.

“Renshaw!” Mal reaches out and the two men clap each other on the back, friendly as you please. 

The skinny man beside Renshaw looks about as thrilled as Jayne feels at this development, his own hand inside his coat. Jayne nods in his direction and he tips the brim of his hat in return.

“Cain’t remember,” Renshaw says. “You met Stacey before? He’s new to my crew.”

“Don’t reckon I have. Pleasure,” Mal tells the silent man in front of him. 

“Same.”

Chatty fella. Jayne clears his throat.

“Right. Renshaw, this is Jayne. He’s on my crew--doubtful you’ve crossed paths before, I know you stick closer to the central planets these days.”

“Jayne.” Renshaw grins, his smile crooked. “You can let go of your gun, I suspect. We’re all friends here.”

“Are we? I ain’t in the market for friends.”

“Jayne’s a girl’s name,” Renshaw’s man says, and Jayne’s hand twitches near his pistol. Maybe it is better if he lets it go for now. 

“Well, I don’t know what to tell you. When my momma brought me out, Stacey was already taken.”

Renshaw decides to ignore them, and turns back to Mal. “What brings you to Persephone on this fine day, Reynolds? Didn’t you get shot on Mykan all recent-like?”

“Weren’t that recent,” he says with a shrug. “I’m up and about now, just doing some trading. Getting tied soon, and there’s all manner of particulars we need for that, as it happens.”

“Well, congratulations!” The leader of the rival crew claps his shoulder again. “Who’s the lucky lady?”

Jayne snorts. The man’s wrong twice; Simon ain’t a lady, and he also ain't much lucky, far as Jayne can tell.

“No such lady,” Mal replies, aiming a warning look Jayne’s way. “I’m marrying our crew doctor--he and I have been flying together for years now.”

“You’re kidding.” Renshaw looks between Mal and Jayne for the punchline, laughing when it didn’t come. “The fearsome Malcolm Reynolds, last man standing in Serenity Valley? Spreading on the sly? Well and I thought I’d seen everything the ‘verse had on offer by now.”

“You’re gonna want to find a new joke,” Jayne tells him. “This one ain’t funny.”

“Jayne, leave it,” Mal starts to say, before Renshaw cuts him off. 

“Son, you’re gonna want to stop giving me orders before Stacey here puts you in your place.”

“I’m right familiar with my place,” the mercenary says, as Mal looks on. “It’s exactly where I’m standin.’ You both might wanna reconsider your own locations though. You’re about three hundred rotations back in time, ain’t ya?”

“You’re telling me you fly with him, muscle like you?” Renshaw asks. “Knowin’ what he gets up to?”

“‘Course I do. Why wouldn’t I? He pays me.” It has always been that simple for Jayne, even if he sometimes also feels pangs of family and affection and home for the folks on Serenity. “I get paid, I got no problem. I’m here helpin’ him pick out wedding beads, ain’t I?”

“Well, I hope you know,” Renshaw warns, that crooked smile of his a sneer now. “Sly can be catching if you don’t put a stop to it. Next thing you know, it could be you tied to a--”

Mal expects the next word out of Renshaw’s mouth was to be insulting. He doesn’t have to hear it, though, because Jayne’s knuckles knock the words right out of Renshaw’s mouth--along with two teeth. 

Stacey reacts immediately, going for Jayne while Mal just sort of stands by, feeling useless under the circumstances. If he takes a punch to the wrong spot, he’ll bleed internally: Simon lectured him on that possibility multiple times before letting him out to shop today.

Jayne doesn’t give him long to mope, though. A gut punch doubles Stacey over, followed by an elbow slicing down to catch him behind his neck. He’s left sprawling across Renshaw, both men unconscious. Jayne cracks his knuckles and lets out a whistle, feeling cheerier after the excuse for a fight. 

Not much of a fight, only two men and all, over awfully fast...but still, made Persephone more fun for a minute there.

“Why are you staring?” He asks Mal, once he looks over and sees it.

“After all that kuh wu crazy you were spoutin’ earlier about me and Simon, it’s Renshaw’s words you take offense to? You dropped them both like it was your mama they insulted.”

“You know me, Mal!” Jayne protests. “Words ain’t my speciality. I’m always getting smacked for ‘em.”

“So your reasoning was, you should beat up Renshaw? In my honor?”

“‘Xactly.” Jayne nods. “Not like you could do it, not today. And you shouldn’t have to, anyhow. Get mussed up or bloodied while you trade for your wedding. You gotta look purty for your bridegroom, in’nt that right?”

Mal stares down at the men who are starting to stir, then back at Jayne, who seems as sincere as Jayne ever gets. 

“You really do confound expectations,” Mal says. “We should mosey along, I think, before they find their feet again.”

“What about your beads?” Jayne points to the table they were perusing before Renshaw joined them. “Those blue ones are nice.”

They’re painted wood, and the old woman selling them has a sweet smile. Mal decides that if Simon wanted a different color, he should have specified--the blue suits him just fine. 

“Yeah, pay for those and let’s go,” he agrees. “We have to find a ribbon next, fancy yellow one. Don’t suppose there’s a yellow ribbon table up ahead, do you?”

“Could be.” Jayne shrugs, handing him the beads and leading the way toward the center of the market. “What do you need a ribbon for, anyhow?”

“Simon’s got all kinds of ideas. I haven’t asked too many questions,” Mal admits, grinning when Jayne glances back. “Between him and Kaylee, I’m just doin’ as I’m told.”

“Does that make you the bride?” Jayne wonders aloud. “I keep meaning to ask.”

“Gonna shoot you,” Mal answers simply, and Jayne waits for him to catch up, so they’re walking side by side again.

“I retract the question.”

“Good.”

“Am I gonna need somethin’ fancy to wear?” Jayne asks. “‘Cause I’ve only got my...non-fancy clothing.”

“If you’re real worried you can ask Simon,” Mal says. “I’m guessing the women will dress up, because they want to. But I for one don’t care what you wear.”

They walk in friendlier silence after that, until Mal stops, aiming a knowing finger at Jayne. “As long as you’re wearing clothes.”

“That happened one time! And I was mighty hungover that day.” It’s not like he harmed nobody. No matter what ‘Nara said about mental pain and suffering. 

"Never let nothin' go," Jayne mutters under his breath on their way to a ribbon display, the rainbow of colors including a perfect yellow that Mal folds into his pocket.

“Two more treasure hunts and then we’re back to Serenity,” Mal tells him.

He’s glad to hear it. Jayne suspects the rest of their shopping trip is going to include a lot less punching, so he’d rather get it over with.

As Mal’s friend though, if he is that, it’s his job to be supportive. Right? 

So he tacks away from his real feelings and slings an arm over Mal’s shoulders. “Shiny. Just tell me what we’re looking for.”

#mal x simon #firefly #mal x simon fanfic #mal x simon fic #firefly fic #firefly fanfic #all the days ahead #my fic

[thrashton]

Soaring light (chapter 1)

thank you for your lovely comments and messages for the prologue!! here’s the first chapter!

Name: Soaring Light

Fandom: Skam france

Pairing: Lucas Lallemant/Eliott Demaury

Tags: assassin!au, falling in love, angst, hurt/comfort

Summary: Do not get attached, do not waste time, do not engage in any physical contact… The list of rules were long, but Lucas had never been the one to follow orders. In fact, he might have broken all of them in just a week, all because of the piercing blue eyes staring at him from the assignment in his hands, and the charming, mysterious boy they belonged to.

Chapter summary: Lucas tries to be very subtle as he online-stalks Eliott. It doesn’t go too well.

——--

(prologue can be found at the soaring-light tag at my blog, just click on the tag on this post. tumblr don't wanna show my post in the search tag if I put in links... and on ao3 with the username thetimeisnow)

CHAPTER ONE Why were storms a thing? Who invited storms? Lucas was going to find out and kick his ass. It was stupid, the rain covering his sight was stupid. The way he can’t see in front of the road he’s driving on was stupid.

The whole day was stupid.

Lucas had spent five hours trying find Eliott Demoury, but there was no one at his apartment, no one at his registered working place and no one at his two favorite coffee shops. He had googled his name and regretted it in a second, because dousins - no, hundreds - of model photos of the perfectly sculptured face and the piercing deep blue eyes stared back at him and Lucas had let his laptop fall close with a groan.

He can’t be attracted to his assignment to kill. Well, technically, he could. It wasn’t in the rules. The contract just said he wasn’t allowed any physical contact with his targets, mostly to hide all traces of DNA. And to make sure he didn’t get attached, which was another rule. Well fuck him, just the picture of this man got his knees weak.

Lucas hesitated a moment, then sent a text.

-

To: Manon D.

Change?

-

Change of contract, that meant. Manon would know that. In their work of line you had to keep yourself short and never, absolutely never, give out any information over the phone. Especially not their private phone. Lucas knew he’d most likely get his brains blown out if he said too much and he would never risk one of his closest friends and colleagues life as well. His phone buzzed. Manon, quick with a response as always.

-

From: Manon D.

No thanks, got my dream man ;)

-

To: Manon D.

Ugh. Fine. Drinks tonight?

-

From: Manon D.

That’s a yes, thanks. I’ll tell Mika and Emma. See you at 8?

-

To: Manon D.

Lol, sure. Bringing the boys if they’re up. See you, sunshine.

-

From: Manon D.

Dickhead.

-

Lucas rolled his eyes. His ever the lovely friend and colleague, Manon. They had worked in the same business for two years before they realised they were both carrying the same burden. They had been on the same funeral, a funeral for an older man whose two sons were the target of Manon, and his new wife was assigned to Lucas. He remembered it like it was yesterday as they stood gaping, staring at each other in the church when the priest did his thing.

A smile appeared on his lips at the memory. Back then, it had been the shock of his life but now it was a fun thing to remind him how small the world was. They were going to meet at their usual bar, and Lucas had actually seen a few pictures of the blue eyed God in just that bar when he googled his name, so maybe his luck would turn tonight. He could use that as an excuse to get pissed drunk.

Perfect. Just what he needed.

He parked his car exceptionally well considering the storm raging outside. It was only 6pm, but the sky was pitched black. He gave the car window a good, long stare before he forced himself to get the door open. The few meters from the car to the door of the building he lived in felt like a mile and his clothes was drenched in rain as he stumbled inside, muttering angrily to himself.

Stupid ass weather. He was going to kick its ass.

His older neighbour greeted him from the stairs and Lucas threw up his hand in a reply, he didn’t really feel like speaking until he was in comfortable, warm, dry clothes. And a beer in his hand. Maybe a joint between his lips. Ah. Perfect.

Pulling on his sweatpants like his life depended on it, he hurried towards his bed. Where the magic happens, as his best friend Yann dramatically put it when he visited Lucas new apartment for the first time. Well, where his hand happened. Or, another correction, where his hand was supposed to happen. But how no matter how much he tried, what type of porn he put on, he couldn’t get those stupid fucking blue eyes out of his head long enough to concentrate on jerking off, and there was no way he was going to pleasure himself thinking of his next assignment to kill.

Fucking hell.

Eliott really got the best of him. He needed to get rid of this guy fast, so he could get back to his normal routines, so his body could see some hot, big tits chick on his phone screen and think that’s hot! and not but it’s not him. How was this even possible? He hadn’t even met the guy!

In conclusion, his visit to the bed was unsuccessful. Lucas groaned loudly, burying his face in his pillow. He couldn’t wait to get drunk. A week from now Eliott would be dead and Lucas would be rich and he’d get the fuck out of Paris. He’d bring Yann, Basile and Arthur and they’d go to Amsterdam, or something. Find a nice penthouse apartment where they could throw the best parties in Netherlands, bring the best people and smoke a ridiculous amount of weed.

Lucas phone rang. He glanced over at the screen the name of his best friend staring back at him. Yann would know if he ignored him, that guy could read him like a book.

“Yep”, he answered as he put the phone to his ear.

“We going out tonight?”

“Uh-uh. Manon, Mika and Emma too.”

Yann went quiet for a moment. “Emma?”

“Dude. It was years ago, pull it together.” He gave out a light chuckle.

“Fine”, Yann sighed loudly, “only so you get get your lonely ass out there.”

Lucas laughed at him and got up to a sitting position on his bed. “Do you know a Eliott Demuary?” he asked. That wouldn’t hurt, Yann didn’t know he did for a living. Lucas wanted to tell him badly, but he wasn’t going to risk his best friend’s life only to have someone to talk murder with, that would be dumb. Yann wasn’t stupid though, and Lucas suspected he had a slight suspicion of what he did during his days; not that he’d ever tell him, or that Yann would ever get it confirmed.

“Of course”, Yann replied and Lucas almost choked on his own spit.

Okay. That wasn’t the answer he expected at all. It took a few moment for him to pull himself back together and hide the sudden excitement in his voice as he tried to sound as carefree as possible. “Aha”, he said and shrugged, “how’s that?”

“Why are you asking?” Yann was hesitating.

Fuck. Maybe he didn’t sound as carefree as he thought. “You know, just saw a picture of him.”

“Yeah, he went to our school…”

Lucas frowned. “What? No?”

He imagined Yann nodding from the other line. “Yeah, he did. Literature, I think, not sure. Don’t you remember, everyone was talking about him?”

Lucas did definitely not remember, because there was no way he could forget a face like that. “Are you for real?”

“Yeah!” Yann exclaimed, “are you? Ladies were fighting to get into his pants.”

“Shit.” How did he manage to miss this? Lucas shook his head, no, it didn’t matter. Now he had a way in to complete his assignment and he should be very happy for that since Eliott apparently didn’t want to be found. “Cool. Awesome. Nice. I mean, have you met him recently?”

Yann was silent for a moment. “Are you crushing on Demuary?”

Lucas gasped. “Excuse me? I am not!”

“I don’t blame you. He’s hot and- Oh, sorry, forgot you’re still hiding in the closet.”

Lucas pouted and wished Yann was standing in front of him so he could shove a middle finger up his face. Yann knew he was - or maybe was? He wasn’t really sure himself - gay. A little gay. Just a tiny little bit. Like, dick is nice and all and titties isn’t as nice. Which, in conclusion meant; a little gay. “Unfair”, he told him, “was just asking.”

He could hear Yann moving around. “Well, haven’t met him in a while but I’ve seen him in town a few times. Seriously Lu-Lu, you didn’t know he went to our school?”

“I didn’t, I swear! I wouldn’t forget a face like that. I mean, Yann, have you seen him?”

His best friend laughed. “Yeah, I have. How about you spend some time crying over a picture of Eliott and I come over with some beer?”

“Yeah, that’s fine.”

“Great. I’ll be over in 45.”

Lucas ended the call without saying good bye. He had no time to waste when he only had 45 minutes to google some more information about this mysterious man, who apparently went to their school. Did that mean Eliott knew who he was? No, that would be impossible. If he hadn’t seen Eliott, Eliott hadn’t seen him.

He found an instagram account. With a stupid fucking riddle to solve. It took Lucas longer than he chose to admit to figure out the name of Eliott’s second account, but when he did; it was absolutely worth it. A majority of his posts were black and white art. It looked like doodles but there was real talent behind it.

Too bad he was going to kill the guy, he would really want to hear the stories about the numerous posts of raccoons. A short video caught his attention; Eliott in a black hoodie, staring into the camera with his lips pressed together and his hair in a soft mess on his head. He zoomed slowly until there was nothing else than his left eye covering the screen. Lucas found himself sighing, feeling like an absolute jerk about having to end this, clearly well liked and talented young man’s life.

Most of Lucas’ targets were old men. Rapists, embezzlement criminals or other scandals more often than not involving money. He’d never really felt bad about killing them, a lot of them deserved to die. Lucas never stayed to see if his job was finished after poisoning his targets; he learned early on that it was way easier to get caught that way. Instead, he showed up a few days later, or watched the news if his target was someone famous or well-known.

But Eliott. He couldn’t believe this man had done anything to deserve to die. 50k was a lot of money and the higher the prize, the worse the crime. That’s how it usually went, anyways.

And in that moment, trying to pause the video just when Eliott zoomed in on his eyes, Lucas fucked up. He liked the video. Panicking, he yelped, a high pitched noise he’d be embarrassed to even try to describe, and got up from his bed fast enough to make his vision blur. As a first reaction his brain thought of the brilliant idea to throw the phone away from him to keep him from making more mistakes, but then he realised that shit, he need to unlike the video before Eliott noticed. He stumbled after the phone, tripping over a shirt on the floor and hit his toe in the foot of the bed at the same time. Ignoring the pain radiating through his body, he reached over the bed in panic and clicked on the red heard so fast and intensely that he accidentally disliked and liked it again.

Lucas wanted to scream. With an surprisingly steady hand, he finally managed to to unlike the video and sank down on the floor with a loud groan of disappointment. Shit. What the hell. Being subtle wasn’t his best personality trait, obviously.

Eliott had a lot of followers, someone liking his video wouldn’t matter, right? That was, of course, if his theory that Eliott didn’t know who he was, was correct. Lucas considered blocking him but quickly threw that idea aside; the video was worth seeing a few more times.

The doorbell rang. Yann. Had it been 45 minutes already? Apparently it had, because Yann was standing with a big grin and beer in both hands as Lucas opened the door, still sweaty and his heart beating like crazy in his chest.

“You look like you just ran a marathon. Which I know you wouldn’t.”

“Fuck you”, Lucas smirked at him, giving him a helping hand with the beer. “I accidentally liked one of Eliott Demaury’s posts on instagram. It was stressful.”

Yann let out a snort. “When he sees it, he’ll show up with flowers and a ring and propose right here, I’m calling it.”

“I unliked it. And liked it again. And then unliked it again.”

“Even I am slightly embarrassed for you now”, Yann laughed, “let’s drink to forget about it.”

Lucas smirk grew, it sounded like a good plan. Little did he know, forget about  it was the least he would do that night.

#skam france #skam france fanfic #lucas lallemant #eliott demaury #soaring light #elu #elu fanfic #elu fic #skam france fic #yayyyyyyy chapter one

[theyearoftheking]

Book 5: The Stand

Bloggers note: if you’re looking for a complete plot summary and a list of all the characters in this epic tome, this is not the blog post for you. Proceed with caution. 

Once upon a time, there was a precocious ten year-old, with divorced parents. One parent embraced her weirdness and didn’t pay attention to what books she was bringing home from the library; and the other parent was my dad... who constantly wondered (aloud) why I wasn’t like normal kids. 

Being of slightly above-average intelligence, I saw this as an affront, and did subtle things just to piss him off. Subtle things “normal” children probs wouldn’t do. The summer I was ten, my dad had picked up a paperback copy of The Stand, and was raving to me about how good it was. I remember he was fixated on people falling dead in their bowls of Chunky soup. 

“Sounds like a cool book, maybe I’ll read it,” I commented. 

“This isn’t a book for children. You still haven’t read that copy of The Hobbit I gave you.” 

Hold my beer, motherfucker. I’m here for it. And The Hobbit was boring af. I never got past all the singing. 

Just to piss him off, I read the book cover to cover, faster than he did. You know, like normal vindictive ten year-old girls do. I don’t have a lot of memories of my dad growing up, but I hold onto this one fast and tight, because I got mine in the end. I was like the Trashcan Man of the fifth grade set. Just with a worse haircut. See below. 

Needless to say, my comprehension of The Stand almost thirty years later is a little bigger, wider, and deeper. It’s also colored by other epic “Good vs. Evil” reads (sigh, yes... even Tolkien); and King’s other works (mostly The Dark Tower). While at times this was not an easy book to read, I’m glad I powered through it. Ultimately, I feel rewarded I didn’t give up on page 872 like I had initially wanted to. I’m also glad I didn’t go with my gut instinct of reading the original released in in 1978, and then later on the uncut edition that was released in 1990. One reading of The Stand per year is more than enough, thank you. And besides, there’s fun pictures along the way! I mean, if I’m being honest, the book is mostly pictures with just a few words here and there to break it up. I’m absolutely kidding. 

Let’s get into it, shall we?

First of all, I picked the worst fucking time to read this book. Coronavirus is probably going to kill the whole world, and I refuse to be one of the survivors like in The Stand. There’s not enough bourbon in Kentucky for me to survive that shit show. Additionally, my family is huge into board games, and we thought Pandemic might be a fun cooperative game to try. Spoiler: it’s awesome, we’re all hooked on it. I highly recommend it for your next game night. Maybe an End of the World/Pandemic theme?? You can all wear gloves and masks, eat shelf stable foods and bottled water, and play REM on repeat. Sounds... awesome. 

But I digress. The Stand is your ultimate post-apocalyptic good versus evil showdown. A government employee with Captain Trips (the world ending virus) goes AWOL from his base, and takes a frantic road trip across the country with his family, where he manages to contaminate everyone he comes in contact with. 

What is Captain Trips? Well, I’m so glad you asked! To hear a doctor explain it, “We’ve got a disease with several well-defined stages... but some people may skip a stage. Some people may backtrack a stage. Some people may do both. Some people stay in one stage for a relatively long time and others zoom though all four as if they were on a rocket-sled...” 

The virus spreads (like viruses do), until there’s less than 15,000 people left in the country (rough estimate). The people still alive start having two types of dreams; either scary nightmares about The Walking Man, or peaceful dreams about Mother Abigail. Again... good versus evil. Guess who is who. If you need clarification, let me give you this one little quote about Randall Flagg, courtesy of Mother Abigail, “He’s the purest evil left in the world. The rest of the bad is a little evil. Shoplifters and sexfiends and people who like to use their fists. But he’ll call them. He’s started already. He’s getting them together a lot faster than we are. Before he’s ready to make his move, I guess he’ll have a lot more. Not just the evil ones that are like him, but the weak ones... the lonely ones... and the ones that have left God out of their hearts.” 

And his followers?

“They were nice enough people and all, but there wasn’t much love in them. Because they were too busy being afraid. Love didn’t grow very well in a place where there was only fear, just as plants didn’t grow very well in a place where it was always dark.” 

Yeah. I’m just going to leave that there for you to read and digest. 

So, the remaining people from all over the country either ended up in Vegas with Flagg, or Boulder with Mother Abigail and The Free Zone; which is basically Bernie Sander’s Utopian dream. 

God damn it! I swore I wasn’t going to get political and compare Donald Trump to Randall Fla- 

Ok, so The Free Zone. Most of the people who come to Boulder, want to meet Mother Abigail Freemantle, the one hundred and eight year old black woman they’ve been dreaming about. She’s got a self-described case of the shine, and speaks stupid relevant truth to her followers, “I have harbored hate of the Lord in my heart. Every man or woman who loves Him, they hate Him too, because He’s a hard God, a jealous God, He Is, what He Is, and in this world He’s apt to repay service with pain while those who do evil ride over the roads in Cadillac cars. Even the joy of serving Him is a bitter joy. I do His will, but the human part o me has cursed Him in my heart.” 

I’m not religious, but that hit hard. And it shows you the clear difference between Randall Flagg, and Mother Abigail. 

Later on, Mother Abigail also hits us over the head, and explains to us why this book is titled, The Stand: “But he is in Las Vegas, and you must go there, and it is there that you will make your stand. You will go, and you will not falter, because you have the Everlasting Arm of the Lord God of Hosts to lean on. Yes. With God’s help you will stand.”

Spoiler: it doesn’t quite go according to her plan. Very few are left standing at the end.

 So, The Free Zone. People come together, dispose of dead bodies, get electricity turned back on again, clear the roads of abandoned cars, and form a de-facto government. While lots of characters come and go (die. They die.) throughout the book, there are a few mainstays in The Free Zone: Franny, Harold, Stu, Larry, Nick, Tom, Nadine, and Lucy. But again... good versus evil. While most of the residents of The Free Zone are good, Flagg is able to whisper in the ears of some members, mostly Harold and Nadine, who end up defecting and making the trip to Vegas. 

While socialist utopia is succeeding in Boulder, Flagg is ruling with fear of crucifixion in Vegas. His henchmen include Lloyd, and The Trashcan Man. Oh, Trashy... maybe one of King’s most iconic characters. He’s a bit of a firebug (understatement of the century), and really goes out in a blaze of glory (ha. Pun intended). 

In fact, the two heroes of this book are Trashcan Man, thanks to his epic nuclear disaster; and simple-minded Tom Cullen, who is able to infiltrate Flagg’s inner circle, and successfully make it out, rescuing Stu Redman, who is dying in the desert with a broken leg and a horrible infection along the way. Tom Cullen is the character you root for. But Trashy is the character you’re always curious about. He’s like that rebel guy you dated in high school for ten minutes, and now stalk on Facebook, because you want to see what shady shit he’s up to twenty years later. 

This is the biggest oversimplification I think I’ve ever written. The onus is on you to just pick up the damn book and read it yourself. Do it soon, because you might not have a lot of time left, what with Coronavirus breathing it’s death fumes down our necks. 

For those still keeping track, we have TWO Wisconsin references in The Stand. The first was on page five, set in a gas station in East Texas, “...had covered himself with glory as a quarterback of the regional high school team, had gone on to Texas A&M with an athletic scholarship, and had played for ten years with the Green Bay Packers...” 

I can’t help but feel Steve is a closeted Packers fan. He lives in Maine, so I know he’s contractually obligated to be a Patriots fan (gag), but come on... homeboy loves him some green and yellow. 

The second reference comes from our friend Trashcan Man, while trying to find a walking route of possible destruction. “He had planned to get over to the west side of Gary, near the confusion of interchanges leading various roads towards Chicago or Milwaukee...”

Question... does Gary, Indiana still smell in a post-apocalyptic world? Asking for a friend. 

We also start getting the Dark Tower references fast and heavy. I didn’t make note every time Steve referenced wolves, crows, or wheels; because we’d be up over a million references now. And Randall Flagg himself is straight out of The Tower. So that’s fun. And we have our first “ka” reference: “And it came to him with a dreamy, testicle-shriveling certainty that this was the dark man, his soul, his ka somehow projected into this rain-drenched, grinning crow that was looking at him...”

‘Tis ka, bitches. 

Total Wisconsin Mentions: 8

Dark Tower References: 4

Book Grade: A- 

Rebecca’s Definitive Ranking of Stephen King Books 

The Shining

The Stand

‘Salem’s Lot

Carrie 

Night Shift

Next up is The Dead Zone, which I must have watched a million times as a kid, because my mom was obsessed with it, but I’ve never actually read the book. So this should be fun! I mean... who doesn’t love reading a book and imagining Christopher Walken without his cowbell as the main character? 

Long Days and Pleasant Nights, Rebecca 

[tessatechaitea]

Scarab #3

Every time I see a Glenn Fabry cover, I assume I'm about to read about Jesse Custer.

I also know the term "misdirection"! Look at all the titties!

I wanted to say I knew the word "legerdemain" because it's way fancier but it wasn't as specific as I wanted to be. But I still wrote the previous sentence where I say wanted to write a different sentence so that you know the thing I wanted you to be impressed by in the first place. Meanwhile, Eleanor is still flying around in the Net having profound Vertigo thoughts. If you're speculating, "I bet she thinks about her first kiss and the first time she got her period and her father's funeral and the rain on her wedding day," I'm aghast. How'd you know?! Fucking clever of you, mate. Two new characters are introduced: Sidney Sometimes and his sidekick (not named! I'm not even sure "Sidney Sometimes" is the other guy's name). They're Fortean dudes publishing a Fortean magazine. But this one is heavy on the sex and mutilation and probably drugs. Sidney's upset that his alien rape story has fallen through and now has to decide if he should run the Manson interview this month or next month alongside the DIY surgery issue. I'm sure these characters will fit into the story later but for now they just seem like a one page dumping ground of John Smith's story ideas.

Sure, every teeaboo knows what a Clanger is now. But back in 1993, American audiences wouldn't know what the fuck this was about.

Speaking of teeaboos, I've got a new idea for a streaming service: I'm the only customer and I'm paying a single British person to upload all the shows I want to watch on a private YouTube channel. Come on, somebody! I need a reliable source for full episodes of Taskmaster! Marty is the guy watching some Clangers. He's still bitter that all the men drowned themselves without him. Imagine having self-esteem that low that you're hurt and angry that nobody invited you to the mass suicide? I guess he could also be affected by magic but I'd rather think he's got the same kinds of problems that I do. I mean that we all have.

See? He's Everyman!

Scarab arrives in Whitehaven, the town without any men (except for me. I mean Marty). He realizes something bad is happening in Whitehaven because, um, women are running things, I guess? Maybe his subconscious is reacting to an article he forgot he read about how hundreds of dead and bloated men washed up on the shores of nearby towns for weeks. It doesn't seem like the kind of thing you'd forget too readily but remember Scarab was a super old guy for the first two issues. Or maybe Louis is just a Comicsgater at heart. He walks into a town full of women and thinks, "What the fuck is wrong with this comic book I'm in?! Where are all the men? Fucking pandering bullshit!" It's also possible he senses the magic monster at the center of this mystery. But that's not as much fun to speculate about. Louis meets Marty who tells him how every woman in town is now four months pregnant and how the matriarch of the town is living with a monster. He's going to take his shotgun and put things right. I don't know how a shotgun does that but then I'm not a fucking cuckoo nutso whackjob who thinks every problem can be solved with physical violence. Scarab probably thinks there's a better answer too. I don't mean to suggest he doesn't also think physical violence will be the answer. This is still a comic book, for fucks sake! He'll probably just concentrate the violence on the monster while I assume Marty is just planning on going around shooting pregnant women. It turns out the god Pan is fucking everybody in town. He also drove all the men into the sea. But for some reason, he couldn't figure out how to deal with Marty because how do you get a guy with a broken leg to kill himself? It's impossible! The only flaw in an otherwise perfect plan! Unless Marty wasn't driven to suicide because Marty is trans. It's possible because later that night when Marty goes to shoot Pan in the face, something entirely different happens instead.

Marty was definitely fucked by Pan (raped? Probably! But who knows what happens when you get a whiff of a lustful goat god?!). But what is he trying to show Louis? That he's suddenly pregnant? Or, with his pants open like that, has he lost his cock?

Scarab #3 Rating: C. I'm super confused by this ending. Is the art just not sufficient to portray what Marty is upset about? Is he simply upset that he's all beaten and bloody due to being raped by Pan? Is he holding his pants that way because they were torn off during the violence or because he's trying to show Louis his genital region? Or is he holding his pants that way to show that he's suddenly pregnant? It's possible because the art could be suggesting a swollen stomach. Rarely do I find the art failing me in a comic book to this degree. I suppose the writing is also failing but I only think that's because this final image was supposed to portray whatever the dialogue was leaving out. The good thing is that I don't have to be confused for a full month because I've got the next issue waiting for me in my stack! Corrections: It was brought to my attention that The Phantom Stranger has more than ten fans. Although no proof was provided other than that The Phantom Stranger has gotten published in more than its initial series. I'm not sure that's enough proof though because I've purchased a lot of comic books about characters I didn't give a shit about and by writers I actively hated. But I will grant that the person providing me with this information was also a fan of The Phantom Stranger. So in my previous commentary, I should have said The Phantom Stranger had eleven fans.

#Scarab #Vertigo #DC Comics #DC #John Smith #Scot Eaton

[bangtantannie]

Here’s to 2019

Aren’t y’all just LOVIN all of the activity coming from me today?? aklfa Hal said if there aren’t reblogs let there be CONTENT! idk what i’m even saying omg ahdjshe ANYWAY!  2018... if I could sum it up this was the year of a new beginning. The end of 2017 was an absolute mess I don’t even wanna think about, and I’m pretty sure I was begging every divine figure out there for a better 2018. And,, well, I got it. 2018 will go down in my books as the year I started everything. I picked up a new hobby and got back into an old one, I got to try new things, learn new things - but most importantly, I started this blog and got to meet so so so many new people. So I wanted to say thank you, to every one that’s been with me down to the last hour of 2018 - all one hundred ninety six of you, whether you are a follower or a mutual. Down below are some people in particular that have had an impact on my life, simply because tumblr exists.

2018 was the year of a new beginning, here’s to 2019 being the year of making the best of what I have

Warning: I have quite the essay

@ultmay @ve1vetyoongi You guys were the first people that actually interacted with me on tumblr and I just, appreciate you guys so much. Like, if it weren’t you guys commenting on my first writing post my time as a writer on tumblr probably would’ve stopped with that post forever. I love you guys so so much, and we don’t get to talk often but i hope that you guys know I do think about you and hope you’re healthy, well, and happy! Don’t be afraid to message me if you ever need anything or if you just wanna talk about anything and everything! I hope 2019 treats you guys well! 

@carrotgguk, @officialjoon, @yoonchangi, @skippinginclouds, @namjoonieftw You guys,, I love you guys so much jfc. I met y’all at different times but damn, you all really do have a special place in my heart. Seeing your names pop up in any chat we’re in together makes me so happy, excited, and soft all at the same time it’s crazy! There have been so many times I literally laughed out loud at something you guys sent into a chat. Being able to rabbit with you and hear most of your voices (I know I haven’t heard everyone’s yet but I am ready and excited whenever the time comes) honestly makes my day. Sometimes I just, can’t believe you guys are really out there, living and EXISTING. I really hope I can meet y’all irl one day because imma hug the shit out of every one of you. I hope 2019 is the year that you all are living your best lives,, and if it isn’t well that’s okay! There are many years to come and I can only hope I’ll be there for them <333 (also, someone pls tell Roro this post exists if i haven’t told them already because i don’t have their JK FOUND YOU @chaotikia )

@sugadrop Tiff, you are probably the oldest friend I have if we’re talking in terms of meeting on kkt. Honestly, there’s just something about you that makes me just want you to be happy forever. And your happiness makes me so so happy. There isn’t much i can say that I haven’t told you already, so I’ll just say that I hope our friendship lasts a long time and I genuinely hope we have many years together. I love you so so much Tiff, but I think you already know that xD I hope 2019 is you being out there and living your best life :)

@namseoktual Cai, my cute ASS grandma I love you. I don’t tell you that often (and I should really start jfc) but damn,, I love having you in the chat. you’re so funny and your input and reactions are such a mood. I love how every time you pop into the chat we all immediately stop to give you the welcome and attention you deserve. All the times you were drunk and unleashing chaos on the chat were some g o o d times. You manage to come in at peak chaos times in the chat and then you just know just the thing to get everyone goin I LOVE IT. God I hope 2019 is a good year for you, you deserve it.

@tinyjhs Mae, my “soft” not so soft grandma. (yes i’m bringing it back) I love you, and I don’t think i tell you that enough these days. You are so crazy, but so so funny. I love hearing about your day and having meme battles. I also love being randomly blessed with your voice notes because you just felt like it. If you’re ever feeling down I will be there to attempt to cheer you up. You helped me through my sad boi days and dfakkjsa I appreciate you listening to my problems so so much. I am so so so lucky to be able to call you my friend. I hope 2091 gives you everything you’re looking for in the world.

@tatavangogh Monet, the “innocent” one. Seeing you play the innocent card in the midst of PEAK chaos in the chat makes my brain go awklfhlskhfa (and,, I hope you’re watching out for my attack). But I also love and appreciate the fact that you’re always so supportive and caring. I met you earlier than most of the deer squad, but I’m so glad that I got the chance to really get to KNOW you. Like, wow you are an amazing person that’s so sweet and funny. AND I love just how were greet each other by screaming our names first, then saying hi later xD I hope we’re friends for a long ass fuckin time.

@adoreyoongi Daddy Ranch, god l love seeing you all soft in the chat. And i love melting over yoongi pics with you. Seeing you only adding to the chaos that’s normal in our chat is honestly one of the best parts of my day sometimes. You come up with the most interesting, most creative things and I just wonder how you come up with it. I’ll always be there when you’re away at an absolutely ridiculous hour of the night because you were playing video games or you just felt some strange need to c l e a n. Please don’t ever change Rachel, I love you the way you are and I would fight anyone that tries to hurt you.

@crankybangtan Mads, the true deer of the squad. I love and your positivity. Not to mention your reactions to some of the C R A Z I E S T shit we talk about in the chat is equally relatable on a spiritual level and hilarious. Even tho we have a huge time difference, we still manage to catch each other because you’re awake at the crack of dawn while I’m awake at some unholy hour in the night,, and I’m glad but not glad we do what we do? I like talkin to you and the fact you actually gave me your netflix password (which I haven’t used yet idk why LMAO) astounds me. Here’s to a year of making sense of a chat full of crackheads. 

@mainaisikyunnhoon Ash, my wife, my twin, my favorite hooman. Without you, I don’t even know where i would be without you. For one, I definitely wouldn’t be talking to anyone because, well i’d probably be one of those people that just lurk in chats... too scared to say anything. Not to mention you’re always so funny, and you’re kind, and just so so wise! Like, god you have a way with words that reassures me so much and I know I can always go to you for anything. I could never thank you enough Ash. I hope you know I will always be there for you just as much as you already are there for me. Truly, thank you. I hope 2019 is filled with lots of love (from me especially) and just, nice, easy living. 

#here's to a new year #i hope y'all will still be with me for the next new year post #i realize this is the time for follow forever stuff but #as long as i follow you that's already a follow forever to me #hal's honesty hour #this is soft asf

[detectiveharmony]

Landing an Agent and Publisher

  Hi guys! My name is Rachel Rogers. I am currently working on what will be my first published work, Lost in the Breeze, a romantic suspense novel about a high school girl who becomes involved with a much older guy, and I’m here today to tell you a few things I’ve learned about the writing process.

  It seems like a lot of information isn’t made readily available to new authors, so I’m here to take whatever I learn and share it with you guys in the hope that it will be more easily accessible. With the advent of the Internet and YouTube, we have way more information at the touch of our fingertips than we ever thought possible, but sometimes it’s hard to know what to look for.   Today I’m talking about landing a publisher and an agent. Now, last week I published a post detailing the differences between self publishing and traditionally publishing. Anyone who has read that will know I am leaning more toward self publishing than traditionally publishing, but I have done a fair share of research about traditionally publishing. If you haven’t read the post, go check it out.     Recently I’ve been reading a work that’s a little older, but still has a ton of good advice. It’s called the Author’s Guide to Building an Online Platform by Stephanie Chandler. This was written before Facebook and Instagram and Twitter became huge, but her advice still brings good merit. Most of the information in this post will be based off the first few chapters of her work.

Step #1: Be original

  The concept of originality is horribly skewed. Obviously, 99% of people aren’t going to write something that is totally and completely original that has never been done before, but whatever you write, it needs to stand out. Take my book for example. The concept of forbidden love has been done again and again and certainly an age difference as the defining factor doesn’t make it original at all, but the fact that my characters are their own people, this is their story, and they’re living their own real lives—this sets it apart from other works that are like it. The fact that hundreds, if not thousands, of authors are writing within the same genre that you are makes it difficult to stand out, so let your story be its own, and let the characters who they need to be. And even if you don’t think there is anything unique about your story, talk it up. Don’t be afraid to talk about how awesome it is. Agents and publishers want to be confident in you, so you have to be confident in yourself.

Step #2: Understand the publishing business

  It makes sense that if you want to go into a field, you have to understand that field. In her book, Stephanie Chandler suggests going to writing conferences. There are hundreds of conferences and groups that go on around the world, and as I said before, with the advent of the Internet, the knowledge available is endless. Go to your local library and pick out books about publishing, search Google, join writing groups on Facebook, attend conferences, do whatever.  The more knowledge you have about the industry, the better you will be prepared when doors are open for you. If you don’t know anything about the industry, you may not know when an opportunity is staring you right in the face.

Step #3: Find an agent first

  If you’re traditionally publishing, you need to have an agent. Most publishing houses and all big publishing houses require an agent in order to submit a manuscript. There are several websites online where you can make contacts with agents. A couple of these are aar-online.org and anotherrealm.com/prededitors/pubagent.htm. Most agents only cover certain genres however, so before you make contact with an agent, be sure that agent covers your genre. You should be able to find this information on their websites. With each of these agents, they’ll have submission guidelines on their websites as well, which you should read carefully, and once you find one you’re interested in, you’ll need to write a query letter, and if they are impressed with what they see, they’ll invite you to send sample chapters.

 #4: The query letter and proposal

Query letters are like resumes you can submit to agents. That being said, you want to make sure your query letter is as perfect as it can be. Don’t make it too long, though. Agents and publishers are busy people, and you only have a few moments to capture their time, so whatever you write, be sure it’s your best work. If your query letter isn’t well written or you haven’t convinced them your work is a hundred times better than the competition out there, they’re not going to accept you. You need to convey how great your book is, how it’s going to stand out from the rest, what audience it’s for and why you’re the best person to write the book. Once your query letter gets accepted, the next step is the proposal. Stephanie Chandler outlines these critical things your proposal should have: 1. Book Overview This is written to entice the reader, and should be two to five pages long 2. Market Analysis Explain who is going to read this book and why. Indicate any statistics that support your claim. 3. Competitive Analysis List at lest five competing books and how your book is different or better. 4. Marketing plan Provide a detailed plan for how you will market the book. If you have a high-traffic website, you can list that, or if you are really popular on any given social media, you can list that as well. Agents get really irritated if you indicate you haven’t done any marketing for the book yet, or you will when the book comes out. Marketing needs to happen way before the book comes out. In Jenna Moreci’s class on marketing on Skillshare, she says, starting out, an author needs 3 basic things: an author website, a mailing list, and a blog. 5. Author biography As any resume type, you don’t want to make this your life history, but a comprehensive list of your skills, achievements, and experiences as it relates to the book. If you can’t think of anything to write here, take a pen and paper and write down every great achievement you have made with writing. I did this once for a job, and they hired me on the spot. 6. Chapter outline A detailed list of chapters as well as a summary of each chapter will be needed here 7. Sample chapters Most agents will require two or three sample chapters. Make sure they’re your best work and whatever they read first grabs their attention immediately. It seems like a lot of work, but anything in life that is worth it will be. Remember that nothing is going to happen overnight, and you should take time to prepare before you start contacting agents and editors.

 #5 Building an author platform.

  Since the market is so flooded with authors everywhere who want to be published, most publishers will only accept those who already have a following as proof that they can sell books to the public. Which means if you have put in zero effort marketing your book, and didn’t plan to because you thought once you got a book deal your publisher would do everything for you, you would be horribly mistaken. If you go on Facebook and look at writing groups, some of these groups have over fifty-thousand members. Those are all people writing things and most hope to be published one day. If you want to land a publishing deal, writing an amazing book isn’t good enough. As idealistic as that is, you’re going to have to put in some real work learning how to be a business person if you want to succeed.   So that’s all I got for you today. I actually had a lot of fun researching and writing this. As I said, Stephanie Chandler’s book is older, but it is definitely worth the read. I found it at my local library, but I’m sure you could find it off Amazon or somewhere if it isn’t in your local library. Thank you guys so much for reading! I’ll be back next Monday with another blog post, so be sure to look out for it. See y’all later. Bye!

#writerblr #writer #write #writing #bookbuzz #amwriting #publisher #agent #publishing #reading #novel #novelist #writing help #writing advice