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SVTFOE Oneshot: Princess Con part 1

During 3.9.1

“Okay, you need to hold still. One more second. It needs to be perfect.”

Star was bussing around Marco in the back of the carriage, coating him with make-up with the efficiency of a professional team. Ponyhead was sulking to the side, sending searing looks Marco’s way now and then. When Star was done, Marco looked amazing.

“How do I look?”

Star then lifted a mirror for him.

“Super pretty!”

Marco then gasped. “Oh, no.”

“What’s the matter? You don’t like it?”

Marco carefully placed his hands on his face to avoid messing up Star’s hard work.

“No, I know I look amazing, it’s just…”

He then growled in annoyance at himself. “I can’t go to Princess-con like this! I’ve got to come clean!”

Ponyhead chose that moment to float over and shove herself into Marco’s face, but being careful not to mess up Star’s work of art that was resting on the Earth-turds face.

“You should! You never should have been on the ballot for Princess of the Year in the first place! I am obviously one of the two best princesses ever and this is the first year I can enter the Teenage princess championship. You only got on because you staged one measly armed rebellion and sold some toys!”

“Hay, I also helped to convince the authorities to shut the school down and sent letters detailing the violations of human rights that I experienced there to each kingdom to help ensure that what happened would never happen again! Also, I can’t believe they have me in the running for Princess of the Year either. I never entered the contest in the first place!”

Star inserted her arms between her two best friends to separate them. “Hay guys, let's keep the fighting to a minimum today, ok? This is Marco’s big moment, and I don’t want anything to ruin it for him.” She then turned to Marco. “If you want to come clean about this, go ahead. I’ll support you either way.”

Marco smiled at her. “Thanks, Star.”

She then turned to Ponyhead. “Pony, I am sorry that you didn’t get into the finalist for the Teenage Princess of the Year. However, that is not an acceptable reason to be mad at Marco. Be happy that someone you know is getting the award and try to support him. OK?”

Ponyhead glanced down from Star’s stare before sighing dramatically.

“Fine, I’ll play nice. But if he gets kicked out for not being a real princess then I call dibs on his slot.”

He then reached into his dress and pulled out a letter. It read

The carriage then slammed to a stop, sending Marco tumbling out of his seat. Ponyhead then shoved her face out the window as she began to yell at the goat.

“Hay, goat, just because you’re invisible doesn’t mean I can’t hurt you! Oh, we’re here.”

The door opened to reveal a massive convention hall designed to look like a castle. crowds of adoring fans lined a red carpet leading to the entrance where a large banner hung over the door.

Princess Con! A celebration and exhibition of everything a princess wants, needs, or aspires to be!

“Finally, the respect and treatment I deserve.” Ponyhead then floated out with Star helping Marco get his dress through the door.

“Hay Pony-fans, here’s Ponyhead!”

Everyone looked at her in confusion before gasping in shock and delight.

“Look! It’s Princess Turdina!”

At that, all of the princesses began screaming and waving from the other side of the fences lining the walkway. Marco just stood still in fear at his legion of adoring fans as he was stuck in the doorframe of the carriage.

“Ok, I can’t do this. Just push me back in please Star, my poofy dress is stuck.”

Star shot him a small grin before Marco sighed in defeat.

“Star, I am having a princess problem. Can you help me?”

“Ok, stand up straight, arms forward, and exhale.”

After following the instructions, Marco ended up outside of the safety of the carriage.

“I asked to get INTO the carriage Star! Why did you get me out of it?”

Star just shot him a smile. “We came all this way for the convention, and all of the princesses here came just as far to see you. The least you can do is walk down the red carpet for them.

Princess Arms then popped out of the crowd wearing a sash that said “con coordinator.” She then turned to bow to Marco. “Princess Turdina! It is truly an honor.”

“No, wait, you don’t have to-“

“Hay, you saved me from St. Olgas, bowing to you is the least I can do.”

She then grabbed both his arms with all four of hers and began to drag him down the red carpet to the delight of Star and the anger of Ponyhead.

“I can’t wait to show you around your very first Princess-Con!”

“Oh! It is on!”

When they got to the doors, Arms prepared to dramatically throw them open despite another princess using them not one minute earlier.

“Welcome to Utopia!”

Armes threw open the doors, revealing the scene behind them. hundreds of booths covered the floor, with thousands of princesses wandering between them. Everything was themed around royalty, girls, and ESPECIALLY princesses.

The booths themselves were about everything from make-up to styles of ruling to autograph stations for several popular princesses and queens. In the distance, four booths arranged in a circle like pie slices could be seen with massive lines stretching to the walls.

“Wow! That’s a lot of princesses!”

Arms just smiled at him. “Hay, this is a gathering of every princess from every dimension with access to Heckapoo’s scissors in the multiverse! Given that most dimensions have more than one princess, it adds up fast.”

Marco nodded at that before taking a big breath. “Ok, where is my booth?”

Armes was about to lead them through the booths when a mob descended on them again.

“Princess Turdina!”

“Sign my poster!”

“Sign my cat!”

“Sign my face!”

“Ok, move along, don’t crowd her!”

Star looked at the massive crowd in front of them and at how slowly they were going before she lit up with an idea.

“Hay Marco, Want to take the shortcut to the booth?”

As soon as Marco was done pushing off the princess trying to stick her tongue down his though he immediately turned to Star and started doing a bobblehead impression.

“Yes, please!”

Star nodded before holding out her wand.

“Super Sparkle Cloudy!”

With a flash of pink light, the group found themselves on the back of a sentient pink cloud that then carried them into the air above the mob of rabid fangirls.

“Come Back!”

“Where are you going?”

“Sign my underwear!”

Marco then shivered in terror before scooting into the middle of the cloud. As Star gave him a comforting pat on the shoulder, Arms shot him an apologetic look.

“Sorry about that. Some of those fans can get a little crazy and possessive. I get why, you did save lots of us from St. Olgas and inspired us to be more than just breeding stock. But that doesn’t mean you have to marry one of them.”

Marco then paled at that. “Please tell me that’s just an example and that there isn’t a princess down there who wants to propose to me?”

Star looked over the edge to count the dozens of people with some version of “Marry Me Princess Turdina” on their outfits.

“No, there isn’t one princess down there that wants to marry you.”

“IT’S HALF OF THEM!”

“Ponyhead!”

“How can that many people want to shack up with Earth-Turd when I am single and ready to mingle right here!”

Arms and Star shot her a look while Marco buried his head into his hands.

“Feel free to convince them to marry you Pony. I am not remotely interested.”

Arms then pointed out where Marco was going to be set up, one of the 4 central booths he had seen earlier.

As Cloudy floated down, Marco gave Star a pleading look.

“I will do whatever you want if you stay and protect me from my rabid fans.”

“Deal.” She then held up her wand once more.

“Fan Girl Forcefield!”

With that, the entire table was covered by a large, transparent, pink bubble with a single closed door at the start of the line. As Marco sat down, Arms began to explain how things work.

“For meets like this, each person can have one item signed, one picture taken, and up to one minute of conversation. You can say as much or as little as you want, but PLEASE try to be civil to them.”

Marco nodded at that, then turned to the hoard with a hint of fear.

“Don’t worry Earth-Turd, I’ll set up a booth right outside your booth and they will be so invested in me that they will all forget that you even exist.”

Ponyhead then proceeded to float over to the front door and threw it open.

“HAY PARTY PRINCESSES! Who wants to hang with the one and only Ponyhead?”

The line of princesses just shot her a blank look before turning back towards the door and resumed clamoring at it like nothing had changed.

At that, Ponyhead shot them all a death glare. “Oh! So that’s the way it is, hun? Well, who needs you? I am my own fan club!”

She then floated off into the crowd with only Marco and Star noticing.

“Star?”

She just shook her head. “She just needs some time to herself. Besides, someone needs to make sure you leave here in one piece.”

Marco shot her a small smile before taking a deep breath.

“Star, let the first one in please.”

Star then nodded before opening a small panel at the top of the door that barely fit her face.

“OK, ladies. Time for the first visit with Princess Turdina.”

At that, the whole line exploded in enthusiasm.

“HOWEVER! There are some ground rules. Number 1, I am the bodyguard, and as such have full authority to decide who gets in and when they leave the bubble.”

“Number two! Everyone gets up to one signed item, one picture taken, and a one-minute conversation with Princess Turdina. You can ask whatever you want, but just because you ask doesn’t mean you will get an answer. If you make her too uncomfortable, I will kick you out. Got It?

Several of the princesses began to complain loudly, but others just nodded.

“Ok, so let's let the little one in a Turdina dress in first.”

At that, Star opened the door and let in the little girl and her mom to see Marco.

“Hello Pincess Turdina! Can you sign my poster?”

Marco smiled and gently took it from the mini-Marco. “Who should I make it out to?”

“Please write “to Susay, ‘It’s not criminal to be an individual!” From Princess Turdina.”

As Marco proceeded to write that down, he tried to decide to do some small talk.

“So, are you enjoying your time at Princess Con?”

Susay proceeded to nod her head so fast Marco was worried it would fall off.

“Yes! I get to meet my favorite princess of all time! You!”

Marco blushed at the praise directed at him.

“Really? Why?”

The little girl smiled at him with eyes filled with wonder.

“You saved all those people from the bad lady! You helped all their parents to see that sending them to those kinds of schools is a bad idea. And after all of that, you kept convincing everyone that you don’t need to be a cookie-cutter princess, that “it’s not criminal to be an induvial!’”

Marco’s smile began to grow as he finished signing the poster and handed it back to her.

“Here you go, and thanks for the pick-me-up speech.”

Susay then grinned like the Chesser Cat and began to hug the poster tightly before the two headed out the door. Star then let in the next princess, a fish-like humanoid who immediately rushed over to Marco and tried to both embrace and kiss him.

“STAR! HELP!”

“Get off him!”

This chapter and its at least two follow-up chapters were born from a realization that 3.9.1 wouldn’t have happened in my universe due to the princesses getting taken home. The convention then emerged from thinking about what would pull so many princesses from different kingdoms together that Marco would have a reason to go as well.

Along the way it changed from “Marco gets a swollen head and decides to do the right thing at the end” to having two plots “Marco battles with insecurities and whether or not he should reveal himself” and “Ponyhead is jealous about Marco being loved by the masses while she isn’t.”

Expect a lot of Ponyhead bashing next chapter. To build someone up, you need to tear them down.

HOWEVER!

To celebrate May the 4th and the new Bill Cipher book this July, I will be doing Star Wars fanfiction this May and Gravity Falls fanfiction this June though August. Due to this, we won’t be seeing updates here until September.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

I decided for my New Year's Resolution to do one fanfic chapter a week for all of 2024. Who knows how long I will be able to keep this up, but next week's fanfic chapter is up on my Patreon. This is also being posted on Fanfic.com, AO3, and Tumbler.

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/user?u=10132890

Fanfic.com: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14051718/1/luz-appreciation-week-2022-from-1228248

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/52823413/chapters/133608991

Tumbler: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/brianedner

I am also doing fanfic info dumps, think wiki articles that go one episode at a time with some compilations at the end on certain topics that are sorted by episode.

Fanfic info dumps here: https://www.deviantart.com/1228248/gallery

#svtfoe #svtfoe marco diaz #svtfoe marco #svtfoe star butterfly #svtfoe star #ponyhead #svtfoe ponyhead #star vs the forces of evil #princesses

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