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#*start tearing up while someone is discussing changes in national presence strategy*
artemisbarnowl · 11 months
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Ive never really regretted a decision before, still haven't. There was no other option for me at the time and it was the best I could do under the circumstances. Even if i wished it turned out different. This is the first time I've made a decision that I didnt actually WANT though. I hate hate hate it and I really hate how i seem to have severed from the me that made the decision in the first place. I know where she was coming from but I can't feel the way i did when I made the decision. I just feel so sad instead! Why is it like this (i made it this way). Why do I have to have less when i wasnt getting enough before. I dont want to cut myself off from potential and the rest of my life but i do want to go back to before (when i was sad in a familar way). Before doesn't exist and it can't ever again and every week i bargain with myself and make the same decision again and again and i hate it every time and its not getting any easier
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cryoculus · 5 years
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How about a soulmate au, maybe the first words one. With ushijima and maybe the words were really weird like "wow I like your balls".
Part Two →
» Word Count: 3,703 words
Note: This was re-written on 07-15-2019 but no major changes were made in the overall plot (⌒ω⌒) This work is also cross-posted on AO3 and it’d mean a lot if you left your feedback on this post or in the link!
*** 
Naturally, Tendou laughed in his face the first time Ushijima showed him.
“Wakatoshi-kun,” he breathed, wiping a tear from his eye, “you better find your soulmate soon so I can tape record the whole thing!”
Ushijima frowned, eyes drifting back to the words marked on the underside of his left index finger. Contrary to popular belief, Shiratorizawa’s ace did have a sense of humor, albeit minimal. He wasn’t so oblivious that he wouldn’t notice if some phrases connoted an underlying meaning to them.
But was, ‘Man. I really like your balls,’ something anyone would say in a regular conversation?
The words written in elegant handwriting on Tendou’s wrist were simple and didn’t leave a lot to ponder on. ‘Hi, I’m the normal guy.’ Couldn’t he have been bestowed with less suggestive first words from his soulmate, as well?
“Maybe you’re going to a brothel in the future,” Tendou offered when he noticed his captain’s obvious distress. “The miracle boy Ushijima Wakatoshi, the unmovable ace, actually seeking pleasurable release. Hmm, but that’s  still a ways away if you ask me.”
The ace knitted his brows together at the middle blocker’s assumption. Ushijima had more tact than that. One would never catch him dead anywhere near a red light district. But he supposed Tendou only meant it as a jest.
“When you get ideas dropping by Kabukicho or somethin’, tell me, okay~”
…Or not. 
***
“Niiyama Girls’ High?” Ushijima echoed.
Coach Washijou merely huffed. “I’ll be away this Sunday when they arrive for the joint practice. Try to learn what you can from their play style. I trust your judgement in seeing what is fit to take note of and apply with our own strategy.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Are a girls’ volleyball club’s tactics truly applicable for us, coach?”
“Don’t underestimate them women, Wakatoshi,” the old man chided. “They’re more graceful than you meaty idiots. More elegant with their plays, too. Have I made myself clear?”
Ushijima could only nod reluctantly. 
***
“I heard the girls from Niiyama are called Queens,” Tendou drawled as he tossed a volleyball into Shirabu’s direction. The young setter caught it swiftly, wedging it under his arm.
“Tendou-san, we’re not finished inflating them yet,” Shirabu sighed.
The middle blocker stuck his tongue out. “How many do we even need? There’s tons piled up in the ball cart already.”
“Tendou, refrain from jeopardizing Shirabu’s responsibilities,” Ushijima spoke flatly as he finished the rest of his warm-up, throwing a cautionary gaze in his direction which the redhead pointedly ignored.
“Wakatoshi-kun is so uptight,” Tendou sneered. “Eh? Is it because a bunch of girls are coming over? Is Wakatoshi-kun flustered all of a sudden?”
“I am simply carrying on Coach Washijou’s request of keeping things orderly in his absence.”
“Hmph,” he simpered. “I just wanna have fun with some cuties, Wakatoshi-kun.”
Ushijima dismissed Tendou’s reasoning to crack his fingers. The crunch of the cartilage beneath his skin was a satisfying pop in his ears, and it eases the cricks that have formed in his joints, eliciting a soft sigh of satisfaction from him. 
“Everyone, listen up please,” Coach Saitou emerged from the gym’s entrance, clapping his hands loudly to garner everyone’s attention. “Niiyama’s already here. Compose yourselves and finish up with your respective warm-ups. We’re going to have a practice match.”
Semi wrinkled his nose. “Coach, isn’t there a bit of an imbalance?”
Coach Saitou smiled. “You’ll know in a minute, Semi-kun.”
As most of his teammates discussed trivial matters among themselves, Ushijima leaned against a wall to bask in his own silence. He was not one to question direct orders from Washijou himself, but this particular joint practice left him with some questions that he’d like to be enlightened with.
If he was feeling it, Washijou would go as far as to invite Mujinazaka so Ushijima could go toe to toe against Kiryu. Why he suddenly took interest in the powerhouse all-female volleyball club of Niiyama was beyond his comprehension. Men and women’s volleyball were separated for a good reason, after all. 
His train of thought was derailed when Goshiki let out an unhindered gasp and Hayato chided the young ace for ‘being so obvious’. The captain shifted his field of view, expression poised as usual, while their guests filed inside the gymnasium one by one. 
The girls of Niiyama High’s volleyball club all had one thing in common: short hair. It made sense. Sure, many professional players he’s seen wore their hair in taut ponytails and bangs bound by headbands. But it’s known to be much easier to play when their hair didn’t grow longer than the napes of their necks. When they managed to settle inside, the rest of Shiratorizawa’s players fell silent, scrutinizing the visitors clad in red and white uniforms.
“We’re the Niiyama girls’ volleyball club,” a light-haired player wearing the jersey marked with the number one proclaimed; a bow swiftly followed her introduction. “Thank you for inviting us.”
“Thank you for inviting us!” the rest of them resounded.
Noticing that his teammates were stunned into silence by the mere presence of the other team in their gym, Ushijima cleared his throat, walking over to them.
“Greetings should be returned with the same vigor,” he reminded.
His words seemingly impelled boys to compose themselves the next second, each one lining up properly in front of their guests.
“Let’s have a good game!”
Ushijima could hear Coach Saitou snickering from where he stood, and even he could see why the coach was finding this quite humorous. It seemed Tendou and Reon were the only ones apart from himself that remained unfazed by the arrival of such unlikely guests. 
As the girls began their own respective warm-ups, Ushijima rounded up his own teammates to minimize the chances of someone making a fool out of himself. Though Shiratorizawa has a reputation that suggested that it housed the most sophisticated students, that didn’t seem like the case when taking the volleyball team into consideration. Outside of a game, most of them tend to be swayed by the strangest things, and Ushijima was certain that being in the same space as a group of girls in the same age group was one of those things.
“Coach Washijou really is the devil,” Reon chortled as he walked over to Ushijima’s side. “Did he really want a one-sided match for us that badly?”
Upon hearing the wing spiker’s words, Ushijima’s mouth downturned into a grimace. He could very much remember the warning in Washijou’s voice when he told him not to underestimate these girls. They were a constant participant at nationals after all. But, still, it didn’t make sense why they would even agree to a practice match against Shiratorizawa, knowing the circumstances.
“Can I have everyone’s attention?” a woman, presumably Niiyama’s coach, called out from the side of the court. All the people in the room halted their ministrations at once. “Since the manpower of each team is obviously disproportionate,” she began, “we’ll be handing out draw-lots to determine who goes on white and black teams respectively.”
So that was how they were going to address the issue that’s been plaguing Ushijima for days. He affixed a thoughtful gaze on the plastic cup in the woman’s hands. It seemed fair, but the idea didn’t completely sit well with him.
“But only those in the starting lineup will be participating in the practice match,” Saitou supplied with a hint of remorse. 
“It’s alright, coach,” Semi assured. “It’s quite fun to see something different every once in a while.” 
The players on each team’s starting roster came forward when called to draw their colored sticks. Ushijima eyed Niiyama’s members with calculative curiosity. Each of them wore a calm and collected demeanor that rivalled his own, as if the idea of going up against one of Miyagi’s powerhouse schools didn’t even faze them at the slightest. But his gaze was particularly drawn to one of the girls that wore the number three jersey. There was a confident spark in your eye that Ushijima only saw in opponents who were certain of their victory. 
When it was his turn to draw his lot, Ushijima got a white stick. 
“Aww, I’m gonna have to play against Wakatoshi-kun?” Tendou groaned, holding up a black stick in disdain. “I can totally beat him, but his spikes can induce fractures, coach!”
Ushijima managed to overhear you complain to your captain, who seemed to draw a white lot as well. “Mei-chan, going up against two captains is hardly fair!”
“I’m sure you all can manage,” Saitou insisted. “We made sure the number of boys and girls on the team is equal. Liberos will also be playing full-time to even out the numbers. But do another rotation when they’re in the setting and serving positions. Now then, please go to your respective sides on-court and introduce yourselves!”
*** 
If Ushijima were to describe the practice match with one word, it would be…interesting. 
The first set had extended up to the thirties, and the ace was already sweating profusely despite it still being early in the game. A noticeable crease was embedded in Ushijima’s brow as he caught his breath, wiping away a sheen from his sweat-stricken skin. He’s conditioned himself to have stamina like no other, but the power he’s forced to use just to get past the opposing blockers was draining him far more quickly than he anticipated.
“Shiratorizawa’s got a monster blocker, yeah?” Niiyama’s captain and one of his team’s middle blockers, Haruno Mei inquired. 
He stared at her, considering her words. “Are you perhaps talking about Tendou?”
“Yeah. The red-haired guy,” she affirmed, keeping her gaze straight. “Well, let’s say that we’ve got our own monster blocker, too.” 
He could have interpreted that as Haruno talking about herself, but he knew what his temporary teammate meant by her words. Just on the opposite side of the net, you were discussing something with Tendou with interest sparking your eyes. When you caught the ace staring, a smirk stretched across your lips.
Ushijima narrowed his gaze. Tendou was already a troublesome middle blocker on his own. He was one of the few that could actually stop Ushijima when he’s already set a momentum for himself. But that’s only because Tendou knew of his habits on-court. You, though? You’ve shut him down in one set more times than any of his rivals have in his entire career despite not having prior knowledge about his style.
“(Name) is a little timid when blocking alone,” Haruno supplied further. “But when she’s paired up with another seasoned middle blocker, they’d be a double threat. I’m sure you’ve heard about Niiyama’s Gemini blocker, right?” 
No, he really hadn’t heard of the title, but it suggested exactly what Ushijima had been observing since the match started. Whenever you and Tendou rotated together in the front, the ace felt as if he wasn’t just being stuffed by one Guess Monster, but two. 
When the game resumed at the referee’s signal, Ushijima unknowingly set a goal for himself.
He was going to crush you.
***
“We gave you quite the run for your money, didn’t we, Wakatoshi-kun?” Tendou slung an arm over Ushijima’s shoulder. “You looked plenty mad back there~”
As usual, Ushijima ignored Tendou’s taunts while he picked up a lone volleyball on the floor. After the practice match—with his team as its victors—everyone was provided ample time for free practice. 
“Ah, that one chick on my team was a real demon, too,” the middle blocker continued, despite his captain’s obvious indifference. “You’d love to have her on your team, Wakatoshi-kun. She’s just like a second me!” 
Ushijima spared him an unreadable look, but he found himself frowning at the redhead’s proclamation. It seemed that he wasn’t the only one who noticed how similar your blocking style was to Tendou’s. But Ushijima didn’t particularly feel the need to articulate his concern.
“I do not believe anyone could be as…lively as you are, Tendou,” is what he told him instead.
Tendou barked out an amused laugh. “Of course not! Even Eita-kun told me I’m like a monster on steroids. I meant the way she played. Her guesses were as good as mine. It’s like we’re meant to be~” 
Once the words left his teammate’s lips, an uncomfortable sensation seized the ace in the preceding moment. Brows knitting together, Ushijima placed a palm over his chest, trying to check for any irregularities in his heartbeat, but everything seemed to be fine. 
He recalled the brief conversation he had with Haruno. Niiyama’s captain implied that you had a peculiar talent for drawing out the best of your fellow blockers’ abilities. It made Ushijima wonder if you truly were a second Guess Monster or simply a genius who could conform with your teammates’ play styles at an exorbitant rate. 
In the middle of his careful contemplation, Tendou offered to play catch with him, and Ushijima was about to accept until—
“Man, I really like your balls.”
Hearing those words aloud made every muscle in Ushijima’s body go frigid. His fingers felt cold, and goosebumps erupted on the flesh of his arms. He could see Tendou freezing up from where he stood in his peripheral vision, too. It was no fluke that he heard the words he was destined to hear right now, in the middle of a joint practice. That only meant…
He turned around. You met his olive-eyed stare with playful amusement. 
“I’ve been meaning to convince Mei-chan to change up our volleyballs to Mikasa ones,” you sighed, twirling one of the balls in your hand. “Molten is just out of trend, you know?”
For once, the captain didn’t know how to act accordingly. His mouth felt dry, like his tongue turned into sand, rendering him unable to make a sound. His fists clenched tightly at his sides, blunt nails digging into his skin in an attempt to calm himself. Thankfully, Ushijima had a talent for retaining his composed demeanor under duress, which made you entirely oblivious to the shift in his countenance.
“Thank you,” he imparted, voice schooled into neutrality. “Our second years made sure to inflate them with the recommended air pressure.”
“They’re in good hands, huh?” You grinned. 
“Oh, Wakatoshi-kun is also in good hands, (Name)-chan,” Tendou snickered, earning him a glare from his usually stoic captain. But the middle blocker didn’t even bat an eyelash at his captain’s reaction. 
“By the way, sorry about earlier. It was just a practice match but I poured everything into it. It probably doesn’t matter since you guys won, right?” You scratched the back of your head, cheeks tinged with a warm color that Ushijima, though he loath to admit, almost found endearing. 
“It is only proper to give everything you have in whatever task given. Any effort given at one’s best will never be pointless.” He chose his words carefully, not wanting to let any semblance of discomposure slip from his mouth. 
You nodded, mouth hung in awe. “Such a straightforward guy you are, huh?”
“Not always,” Tendou coughed and at that point, Ushijima was already contemplating on spiking him in the face to make his chatty teammate shut up for once. 
When the idea popped into his head, Ushijima gulped the next second. It wasn’t like him to think violence upon others, regardless of how much they grated on his nerves. With that, he could almost hear the words his father had told him about soulmates just before he had to leave for another country.
“There’ll come a day when you’ll meet the person who’s going to utter these words to you,” his father had said, tracing his fingers over the strange words on his son’s much tinier ones. “When that day comes, your heart will go into overdrive. You’ll act in ways you never have before. It’ll be like a hurricane tore through your whole being—your soul.”
Those words had been theatrical at best, and dreadful at worst. Ushijima was a bright boy for his age when he was imparted with them, and the first reaction that was excited from him was cold skepticism. 
If that’s true then why are you leaving me and mother behind?
He’d wanted to ask Takashi that one question, but he knew that his father would only leave him with some vague answer and a pat on the head. He never was a straightforward man when it came to things that didn’t include volleyball—always opting to talk in riddles and insisting that Ushijima would ‘know when the time is right’. 
Ever since his father left Japan, Ushijima had always despised the concept of soulmates; it didn’t guarantee happiness or satisfaction. The deity responsible for such a thing simply lumped in random people together even if there was no compatibility whatsoever. 
His parents were a clear example of that and the last thing he’d want to do is to engage himself in something that would do more harm than good to him and his emotional well-being. 
But once today’s joint practice came to an end, he simply couldn’t help it. The way his heart fluttered like a hummingbird’s wings when you stopped to wave your hand at him in farewell was accompanied by an unfamiliar sensation that spread across his entire being. It felt…it felt soothing. 
“Wakatoshi.”
The sound of Reon’s voice yanked him back to his senses. Ushijima blinked, realizing that he’d been standing by the gym’s entrance ever since Niiyama’s players departed, quite lost in thought. 
Unlike Tendou, Reon was better at reading people, even Ushijima—placid and stoic Ushijima—himself. When the wing spiker cast him a knowing look with those thoughtful eyes of his, the captain felt like Reon was picking him apart with a single gaze.
“Is there anything you want off your chest?” was his icebreaker.
Ushijima considered his words, contemplating whether or not the thoughts plaguing his mind were worthy of a discussion. It was but a trivial little thing. He’s faced dozens of discrepancies before that were much more troublesome in nature. Eliciting a sound that sounded like a sigh, but not quite, Ushijima went back inside the gym with the intent of assisting with tonight’s clean-up.
“Nothing at all.” 
***
“Wakatoshi-kun, you’re no fun,” Tendou huffed as he shut the door to their shared room, immediately climbing up the ladder to the top bunk. 
Ushijima eyed him from where he stood, shrugging off his jacket to hang on the hook behind the door. His expression morphed into subtle curiosity because this was the first time he’s talked to Ushijima since practice ended. Tendou had been giving him the cold shoulder throughout dinner, and he wasn’t being discreet about it either. 
Deciding to see where this will go, he took a more neutral approach. “You’ve told me such numerous times already, Tendou.”
“You know what I mean.” He merely frowned. 
For the past three years, Tendou had these sporadic mood swings from time to time and Ushijima had gotten used to them. However, no matter how long they’ve been sharing this room together, the ace never seemed to understand the pattern in his temper. But for some reason, Ushijima subconsciously knew that, this time,  Tendou’s irritation wasn’t entirely baseless. 
When the captain said nothing in response, Tendou clicked his tongue, hopping across the bedrail to land gracefully on the carpeted floor. 
The middle blocker grunted, placing his hands on his hips in an accusatory gesture. “Why didn’t you tell her she’s your soulmate? You a pussy or something?”
Looking over the fact that his heart lurched in his ribcage at the reminder, Ushijima managed to say, “(Surname) did not seem to react strongly to me when I spoke to her. The possibility of her not being my ‘soulmate’, as you put it, is still there, Tendou.”
He clicked his tongue again with more vigor. “That’s ‘cause the first words you told her were, ‘thank you’. How many times does a person hear that from strangers? A whole fuckin’ lot, Wakatoshi-kun.” He graced his dialogue with exaggerated movements from his hands that seemed oddly fitting. “Meanwhile, you’re here with the same exact words she hit you up with tattooed on your fuckin’ hand, and you’re turning a blind eye? Is Wakatoshi-kun a dumbass?” 
The snark in Tendou’s seething rage complemented his words in a strange way. They were enough to catch Ushijima off guard, since Tendou was someone that never lost his twisted glee unless an opponent on-court was besting him. But they were not playing volleyball, and no one was besting him at all.
Or was there?
Tendou fisted Ushijima’s shirt and brought his face closer to his. Carmine eyes bore into his own with an emotion he isn’t familiar with. 
“I’ve been dying to meet who mine is, did you know that?” Tendou whispered airily. “I’m always searching for ‘the normal guy’. But who the fuck is just gonna tell that to my face? You met your own match today, but chose to ignore it? It—it fuckin’ pisses me off, Wakatoshi-kun.”
Ushijima exhaled, refusing to let Tendou’s rash words faze him in any way. He acknowledged his teammate’s strong feelings about the whole soulmate matter, but telling you still wasn’t his decision to make. Not when Ushijima still had his thoughts all over the place. 
“Go to sleep, Tendou.” Ushijima pried his grip off his shirt. “Spring Interhigh Playoffs begin tomorrow. You best forget about this and get some rest.”
Tendou’s glare never let up as he scoffed, making his way to the door. “I’m going to hit some serves in the gym. Don’t follow me.” 
“It was not my intention to.” 
His roommate responded by slamming the door behind him with more force than what was necessary. Almost immediately after, Ushijima could hear Semi barking about the noise in the hall, to which Tendou replied with a muffled, “Fuck off, Semisemi.” 
The captain sighed, sitting on his bottom bunk bed to quell the apprehension rooting itself under his skin. To an extent, Tendou had been right about him being ‘a pussy’. But it’s not as if it mattered. There was no need for him to rush things, nor did Ushijima wish to.
He would tell you in his own time.  
***
Part Two →
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man-i-dont-know · 6 years
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BNHA Chapter 164: Thoughts and Spoilers
I’m late, again. I think this just has become my schedule at this point so... oh well. Let’s get into it.
I wanna start by saying that I am super excited for this arc because at first glance it seems fairly low stakes and in general “relaxing,” in comparison to the last arc anyway. It seems like it will be fun and more informative than emotional. On that note, the first page is Inasa (I hope that is his name, I’ve forgotten) telling Todoroki that They will become the best of buds whether he wants to or not and Bakugou does not seem to like the buddy-buddy atmosphere that’s going on. Then we see that government worker who looks like no one told him that sleep existed, and I think he has become my favorite minor character. “Recently I’ve become afraid of sleeping” is the best way to introduce yourself.
Flaming Garbage Bag, All Might and Present Mic then try to find a seat and Flaming Fart shouts out to Todoroki, who is immediately irritated and I can’t blame him. Wish Todoroki just flipped him off without looking at him but I suppose that would have been a bit out of character. Inasa is kinda pissed too, and I am interested in Inasa’s character greatly, I wanna see how he develops and I want to know more about him. All Might’s presence seems to excite the students and I am glad that he still has that affect on people, it shows that he did a fantastic job when he was a hero, as the symbol of peace.
The eleventh student (not as many as I thought) is introduced and it is Camie, and it seems that this is the real Camie. This is horrifying to me, because it shows that the League of Villains can kidnap people and reintroduce them into society without ever realizing that they were missing. This is scary because it suggests that the League has more connections than we know of at the moment, because none of the known members have any ability that can cause such a lapse of memory. It also means that they can manipulate people directly without any threat of revealing any sensitive information about themselves. They have truly developed into something very dangerous. They are worse than I had guessed last post (I thought Camie might be there to see if we can gain any leads or root out any traitors,  which still might be the case, but not in the way I predicted). Camie as a character is goofy or “bubbly,” but the fact that the League was able to target someone so specifically means they have close tabs on many students, which just emphasizes their strength and intelligence-gathering skills. The good thing is the fact that we realized that we had a problem (thank you Deku) and we are taking steps to gather info on our side as well.
Gang Orca is back and he is mad fresh, he is a sharp dressed man and he also has the crazy eyes and, to me, he has one of the coolest character designs in the series. Addressing the students, he takes up a drill sergeant type personality, which really fits the fact that he was rewarded “most villainous looking hero” title, when he was first introduced. Calling all the students feces, Bakugou tries to talk back then gets tossed, Todoroki says that feces can be useful as fertilizer then gets tossed, and Inasa starts to say something and gets tossed too. Comedy gold right there.
Now we start to learn what this make up exam will consist of, a battle of the “heart.” Since all the students passed the first trial, they have proven themselves competent in a fight, but they failed the second section, which was dealing with victims. Which leads to the big dramatic reveal. Gang Orca is screaming about saving people, trusting the heroes and respecting the victims, the very essence of heroic work. This dramatic speech given at a scream gives way to an opening door, to reveal...... elementary school kids. Truly the most dangerous of foes. The teacher looks to be on the verge of tears and she looks like she needs a hug and a blanket, but if she deals with these kids all day than I get it.
The students retaking the test seem underwhelmed, I’d say Bakugou has a fantastic reaction face, but Bakugou tends to have a face like that for anything. Bad vibes hit me when I learned that the children go to a school called “Precious Brats,” paints a perfect picture of what these students are like. Bakugou makes a kid cry in less than 30 seconds and another starts beating on him for it, which sounds about right. Another kid with a side part takes the “I’m much to smart to fall for anything you say” strategy, and something I noticed: Bakugou has a really hard time with people who have side part styles like that, and those characters tend to have a specific personality. Best Jeanist, Monoma, that one meat grinder kid and now this child. Side parts are a warning sign in this series for Bakugou (makes me curious if Horikoshi knew someone with that hairstyle and had a bad impression of them).
Todoroki is dubbed Five Peepee Man (why is the guy with no hero name getting the most nick names? Hand Crusher and Five Peepee Man, I hope it becomes a running gag that Todoroki just gets loaded with a slew of random nonsense nicknames over time), then is tackled by the kids and he seems genuinely concerned. Inasa is just getting punched, and he is just taking it cause he is still brooding over Fire Fart. Camie seems like she would do fine, but Gang Orca seems to disagree, this might just be because she is too bubbly and a victim might not put their hope in her. Also, the tiny girls think Camie is a “hussy” (man haven’t heard that term in ages), so she will have a hard time getting them to like her. (side note: a kid stole from Bakugou and Bakugou is ready to deck a kid)
Gang Orca leaves Inasa, Bakugou, Todoroki, and Camie to “win over” the kids while everyone else goes to a seminar/lecture. I think this is a brilliant way to have them retake this exam. Since they failed in their conduct, it makes sense that they are going to stress conduct with children like this. This test is so perfect for these four for a range of reasons. Tododroki is either socially inept or sassy, and the fact that I can’t tell which makes it hard to trust him (if I was an outside victim that did not know him). Inasa is so overwhelming positive and loud that he might alienate the civilians he is helping, though I am more worried about his burning hate that he has for Fire ‘Stache, if he can get that passionate about a look in the eye, his people skills are pretty weak too. Camie seems to relate to a very small social group, and might put other people off. Her communication with other heroes might be hindered by her speech patterns as well, even her classmate considers her clueless, which isn’t a quality you’d want a hero to have. And Bakugou... is Bakugou.
We saw so much violence in the last arc that we kinda forgot that there are other aspects to being a hero, and I am elated that we get to explore those aspects more, because those are my favorite conversational topics. How to conduct yourself is a topic I love because I love stories and characters that are leaders somehow, and leaders always have some kind of specific conduct that makes them good and effective leaders. It has been a while since I read this, but Ender’s Game discussed this, as well as Overlord (which is a favorite of mine and I’m thrilled for season two) and these things are amazing to think about. Bakugou, unsurprisingly, does not like this test. I love the touch that the word “despair” hangs over his head, not “anger” or “irritated,” he genuinely fears this test because it was almost made to counter his personality and he will have to put much more effort into it than any of the other students with him.
Present Mic has a panic attack cause he literally can not sit through something that does not have a running commentary, tells “Mighty Boy” that he has to do something and hijacks a microphone from Mr. “I fear sleep,” who puts up minimal effort to stop Mic and boom, now there is commentary. Inasa is being used as gym equipment, Todoroki is being pummeled, Bakugou is trying to fight children, and the girl kids are giving Camie the cold shoulder.
Now Endeavor and All Might start to have the conversation that Endeavor wanted. Crime rates have gone up 3% in a month and Endeavor feels something missing, he wants to know what he is missing. He wants to know what it means to be the symbol of peace. Frankly, I am stunned by this. Hobo Trash Fire Man genuinely seeks out advice from someone he hated, he wants to know what he is doing wrong, he does not feel that things are working as they did anymore, and he does not know what that is. Ironically, this unease is exactly the problem. Unknowingly, Endeavor basked in All Might’s peace, which allowed to act so poorly and competitively, no he is under more scrutiny for his actions despite not changing anything, not just because he is number one now, but because the social climate has changed. Endeavor has to move more carefully now and that “something” he heard breaking was security, which is what lead him to All Might, he is seeing if All Might can provide any security even in his thin state. The whole action of asking for help is exactly what is missing, no one knows who they can turn to.
Horikoshi is brilliant, not only because the asking for help is ironic, but  also because the asking for help, the introspection takes place in an arc that focuses on the students looking into themselves and providing support for the kids around them. I can see All Might doing two things next chapter: a heartfelt speech, or telling Endeavor to observe the students because they are doing exactly what he is looking for, providing support. The only difference, the Symbol of Peace never takes breaks from this supportive position, and they give support to the whole of the nation. More than scare the villains and criminals of the world, the Symbol of Peace gives the public confidence in their own well-being. If it was about fear, Endeavor would have done that ages ago, in terms of cases solved, criminals would have preferred to encounter All Might rather than Endeavor, but in reality, it was switched. Endeavor did not have the same weight that All Might’s name had, because when the criminal is confronted with All Might, his name and his support would have demoralized the villain and encouraged the civilians, where Endeavor’s presence would demoralize everyone.
Well that is everything, I do want to make one last comment about the last couple chapters. This is not a new observation, but All Might has started wearing clothes that fit him, which makes him look sharply dressed, but to me it is depressing. He wore loose clothes so he could transform whenever he needed to, but he realizes now that he doesn’t need to transform, or, more accurately, can’t. He is no longer who he was and he has accepted this, he has accepted the transition of his work over to others, more specifically, to Deku (can you believe that this whole arc seems to be devoid of the protagonist? I like that approach). Well, that is kinda an under developed idea at the moment but I wanted to put it out there before I forgot.
Thank you for reading, I hope your holiday season is going well or tolerable or great or whichever. I hope you have a great day.
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hsews · 6 years
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ABC’s Asia Pacific Newsroom
Posted June 24, 2018 05:51:55
Photo: Almas Nizamidin, an Australian citizen, urges the Australian government to help save his detained wife and mother in West China. (ABC News)
Last year, when Almas Nizamidin returned to Urumqi — the capital city of China’s far-west region of Xinjiang — he was on a mission to find his wife who had been taken from her home by several plain-clothes policemen under no official charge.
Key points:
There are increasing reports that Uighurs are being sent to “re-education camps”
Uighurs are reportedly forced to denounce Islam and pledge loyalty to Beijing
Many say they live in fear of being targeted in Australia
Beijing maintains that it has no comment or does not know about the reports
The 27-year-old construction worker from Adelaide, who became an Australian citizen in 2014 after leaving China in 2009, flew back immediately after hearing the news of his wife, only to find the city he grew up in completely unrecognisable.
Photo: Bordered by eight countries including the former Soviet Central Asian republics, Xinjiang is China’s largest province. (Supplied: Google Maps)
“It looked like an occupation,” he said,
“There were lines of tanks on the streets, and a police blockhouse every 100 metres where police officers scan people’s IDs and the contents of their phones,” he said.
When his wife Buzainafu Abudourexiti was taken away in March 2017 — initially for “re-education” but later sentenced to seven years in prison — she was 25 years old and two months pregnant.
Mr Nizamidin said her crime was said to be “religious extremism”, because she used to undertake Islamic studies in the Middle East.
The young couple are Uighurs, a Turkic-speaking ethnic minority in Xinjiang province, the nominally Uighur Autonomous Region. Most Uighurs are Muslim, and Islam is an important part of the Uighur culture, which resembles Central Asian cultures rather than traditional Chinese culture.
But now, under Beijing’s sweeping “re-education campaign” targeting the Uighurs and their religion, the Uighur culture and identity are in danger of being wiped out, rights groups and experts say.
‘Talk to Almas, he has lost everything’
Photo: A banner at a mosque that reads “Love the party, Love the country” in Kashgar, Xinijang last November. (AP: Ng Han Guan, File)
Since last spring, at least several hundred thousand and possibly more than 1 million ethnic minorities — mostly Uighur — in Xinjiang have been interned in mass detention facilities, according to a series of recent commissions and reports.
“[The detention campaign is] the largest mass incarceration of a minority population in the world today,” a United States commission on China said back in April.
Australia is home to a tight-knit Uighur community of an estimated 600 families, with a combined population of over 3,000 people. Most Uighurs live in Adelaide, with other Muslim minorities who have also been targets of the crackdown.
The ABC interviewed about 20 Uighur individuals from different walks of life in Australia — workers, businessmen, university students, housewives, as well as activists in exile.
Almost all of them have family members or friends currently detained in China, but many refused to speak on the record, worrying their words could embroil family members still living in China.
“Talk to Almas, he has lost everything, so he can talk,” one Uighur man told the ABC in Melbourne.
The ABC sought comment from various Chinese authorities multiple times about the treatment of Uighurs but has not received any comment, however, China’s Foreign Ministry recently told reporters it “had not heard” of the situation while maintaining that Beijing protects the rights of foreigners.
Chinese socialism entering ‘new era’ with mass detention
Photo: Mr Nizamidin shows a picture of him and his now detained wife. (ABC News)
The detainees of the “re-education camps”, roughly 10 per cent of the whole Uighur population in the region, are reportedly forced to chant slogans, watch propaganda videos, denounce their religion and pledge loyalty to the communist party in overcrowded cells.
Photo: People cross a street in the old town in Kashgar, an oasis city in Xinjiang. (Reuters: Thomas Peter)
The Chinese crackdown on Uighurs started in the 1990s, when ethnic frictions flared amid calls for independence of the Uighur people of Xinjiang province.
The long term goal of the Chinese government in Xinjiang has been to alleviate tensions, and beliefs were that efforts to improve the economy would help, James Millward, a historian at Georgetown University told the ABC.
Over the past three decades, the economy of the region has improved, so has transportation and communications to other parts of Central Asia, but the interethnic relations between Uighurs and the majority Han have vastly deteriorated.
There has long been repression of religious freedoms and reports of ongoing discrimination against Uighur people, but the recent reports of a shift to mass detention coincides with the claim that Chinese socialism is entering a “new era”, David Brophy, a senior lecturer in modern Chinese history at the University of Sydney said.
“The presence of a large, discontented minority simply doesn’t fit the official vision of a nation uniting to realise what Xi Jinping calls the ‘Chinese Dream’,” Dr Brophy said.
‘We have raised these concerns with China’: DFAT
Photo: A screen shows Chinese President Xi Jinping in Hotan in western China’s Xinjiang region. (AP: Ng Han Guan, File)
The Chinese Government has regularly cited outside influences namely religious extremism and separatism as a justification for its Uighur crackdown.
Photo: Mr Nizamidin with his wife and mother at Urumqi airport on 15 March 2017. Mr Nizamidin said this was the last time he saw his wife. (Supplied: Almas Nizamidin)
It is true that some Uighurs have found their way into the ranks of Islamist militias in Syria and Iraq, believing that by obtaining military training and international jihadist solidarity, they’ll be able to one day take the fight back to Xinjiang.
“But China maintains a choke hold on Xinjiang’s entry and exit points, and this strategy is no threat to Beijing’s rule — certainly not one that could justify today’s crackdown,” Dr Brophy said.
A Human Rights Watch report said efforts to snuff out the “outside influences” and “religious extremism”— recently enabled by high-tech mass surveillance technologies — have developed into a campaign far broader and much more arbitrary against anyone suspected of political disloyalty, which in Xinjiang could mean any Uighur, particularly those who express, even peacefully, their religious or cultural identity.
In today’s Xinjiang, growing a beard, praying regularly, or contacting people overseas can all lead to one being sentenced to prison or sent to the so-called “re-education camps” to undergo “thought transformation through education”.
“In Xinjiang, it is a massive crime to be Uighur, to be an ethnic minority,” Mr Nizamidin said, “people, like lambs waiting to be killed, have lost hope.”
Some elements of the “re-education camps” resemble China’s Cultural Revolution, as the campaign uses coercive means to try to change people’s attitudes, Professor Millward added.
“Such ethnic and religious targeting of an entire ethnic group and the use of mass incarcerations reflect some very dark historical precedents,” he said.
The Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade said “Australia is concerned about the growing number of reports of mistreatment of Uighurs in Xinjiang”.
“We have raised these concerns with China,” DFAT said.
Uighurs living in fear and trauma in Australia
Photo: Abdul-Salam Alim, a religious leader of the Uyghur community in Adelaide, told stories of his family being torn by the crackdowns, as his in-law listened and wept quietly. (ABC News)
Discussion of the situation in Xinjiang brings up fear and still-raw emotions. Some interviewees burst into tears at the mention of the issue.
“At home I don’t allow these talks to open up in the house, I just try to change the subject,” said Abdul-Salam Alim, a 45-year-old Uighur man and a religious teacher at Garden College, a Muslim community school in Adelaide.
“Because I know if I talk, someone will start [getting emotional] … they lose it,” Mr Alim said.
Mr Alim’s wife has five siblings who live in the Xinjiang city of Hotan. According to Mr Alim, every adult of the five families except for one has been detained or imprisoned, and this leaves 21 children in the care of the only one woman who’s free in the whole family
As Mr Alim spoke, his mother-in-law — the grandmother of the alleged 21 children — sat and listened, quietly weeping.
Photo: Students from ethnic minorities give the Communist Party’s young pioneer’s salute to their teacher (R) at a primary school in Xinjiang in 2012. (Reuters)
Later when asked how she had felt about the situation back home, Mr Alim’s mother-in-law said through an interpreter that she hadn’t spoken to any of her children — except for the daughter in Australia — for nearly 18 months.
“I can’t imagine how the minor kids are surviving without parental care,” she said.
In August 2017, an Australian man who is a Uighur was arrested on his arrival in China’s Chengdu airport, and was subsequently detained for more than 20 days without charge, sources told the ABC.
DFAT confirmed that they provided assistance to a man who matches the description, but were unable to provide further information due to privacy obligations, according to a spokesperson.
‘Beijing, is this what you mean by unity?’
Photo: Security personnel keep watch in a street in Kashgar in March 2017. (Reuters: Thomas Peter)
Another Uighur man with Australian citizenship, who asked to be referred to as “Sam”, described to the ABC how he was assaulted by more than a dozen police officers when he showed his Australian passport at a checkpoint in Urumqi in 2016.
One officer said to him “you think you are Australian?”, and shoved the passport in his face, Sam said.
“I was pushing and saying ‘what are you doing?’ I said [to the officer] ‘you could not do that’.
“Then more than 15 of them came and started bashing me.
“The next thing I could remember I was in the hospital.”
Elminur grew up in Xinjiang’s Ghulja and came here in 2009. The 20-year-old student asked that her last name be held as she still has family in China — she said she remembers being told in school not to practice prayers.
“Growing up I was scared of praying,” she said, “when I first came here I was hesitant to join religious rituals.”
Photo: One Uighur, Omir Bekali, discussed the pains he endured in the camps with AP last month. (AP: Ng Han Guan, file)
A Uighur high school student, who came to Adelaide from Ghulja three years ago, recounted memories of Ramadan in Xinjiang, when students at her school were asked to sign a contract and promise not to fast or go to mosques.
Photo: The 17-year-old student speaking in front of the Chinese embassy during a protest this March. (Supplied)
In March, during a protest in Canberra, the student, 17, made a powerful speech in front of the Chinese embassy.
“Chinese government, you have said you want unity of different ethnic groups,” she said.
“You have said you want all ethnic groups to embrace each other like a ‘pomegranate’,
“Then you started your re-education camps in Xinjiang … where you detain hundreds of thousands Muslim minorities.
“Is this what you mean by unity of ethnic groups?”
Uighurs feel at a loss as hopes for coexistence fades
Photo: Uighur Muslim Omir Bekalic (centre) prepares to pray at a mosque in Almaty, Kazakhstan.
Far away from checkpoints and detention camps, the Uighur community in Australia has carved out a space for themselves where they proudly celebrate and preserve the Uighur culture, and also freely discuss politics — to some extent.
For many of them, it used to be unimaginable to criticise the Chinese government or call for independence from China.
Photo: Young Uyghur women at Wandana Mosque say they feel fortunate to be able to practice their religion in Australia. (ABC News)
But as the crackdown at home turns their homeland into what may resemble a police state, many Uighurs say peaceful coexistence of Han Chinese and Uighurs under Chinese rule is no longer plausible long-term.
Activists openly campaign for an independent state of East Turkestan, and are torn by the consequences that their family members in China are targets of the crackdown.
Many in the Uighur community in Australia told the ABC they feel hopeless, helpless, and unable to trust anyone.
The ABC has contacted the Chinese embassy in Canberra, the Chinese Foreign Ministry, and various authorities in China for comment but all attempts have gone unanswered.
Gallery: Foreign Correspondent visits Xinjiang
Topics:
unrest-conflict-and-war,
government-and-politics,
religion-and-beliefs,
human-rights,
islam,
china,
australia
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