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#BUT YEA THE TALKS WENT WELL
killjoy-prince · 2 months
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House M.D. but it's when a character says the name of the episode
#house md#prince's talk tag#flashing#repitition#so as i was watching this show i noticed they'd say the episode title in the episode#so i wanted to see how many times they did it#the people on livejournal who made transcripts of the episodes are my saviors and without them this would of been so much harder to do#thank you all for your service and i hope wherever you all are you're having a great day#sometimes they would use a variation of the word like in the episode poison they would say 'poisoned' or 'poisoning'#i did not include those instances#there was an instance in 'merry little christmas' where they do play the song in the show#but since ella fitzgerald was not a character in the show i did not include it#where as in the episode 'joy to the world' the students are singing it in the concert so i did include that#i apologize for the tonal whiplash when you get to that part but it did make me laugh#one of the times kutner says 'locked in' is overshadowed by the POTW's voice over but i assure you he says it and thats why its in there#out of the main characters from the one who said the title the most to least are#House > Foreman > Wilson > Chase > Cuddy > Adams > Cameron and Taub > Kutner > Thirteen and Park#this took a bit to do lolol its probably been done already but i wanted my own#there is a chance im missing some on technicalities but idc. im fine with this#there are two more i wanna do but with a character saying another character's name but ill do that some other time#EDIT: When I was making this video I was unaware that the Pilot episode went by two names: 'Pilot' and 'Everybody Lies'#Basically everywhere I looked the first episode was only referred to by 'Pilot'#which I found weird bc i remember seeing somewhere that the last episode was paired with the first episode in terms of title#but i couldn't find hard proof so I decided to leave it out at the time#well i checked again last night and yea the pilot IS also called Everybody Lies so I updated the video#I also think it goes well with the fact that House does say 'Everybody Dies' in the finale so another reason to fix it#AND he says it without Wilson while he and Wilson say the title of the pilot sooooo yea hehehehehe
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meamiiikiii · 8 days
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i will not elaborate further beyond the original notes i had:
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these are the type of thoughts i have while eating breakfast ASDASD
#isat spoilers#isat act 6 spoilers#isat act 6 secret encounter spoilers#isaloop#in my mind this is isaloop even if u cannot see isa he is there metaphorically off screen u see#seperated from prev cuz it did not distinctly fit the sentimental vibes this is infinitely sillier to me ASFASDA#well that and i kept messing with the way i was coloring it lmao#...okay maybe i will elaborate a bit more in tags ASFASFAS#the thought process was to divvy up the most identifiable wearable items from each party member onto siffrin and loop#these items needed to be reasonably removable ofc#they were also not going to be related to their customs (no bonding earrings for example)#the original plan was to give siffrin miras shawl bonnies hat isas belt and odiles glasses#then i was like ehhhh actually idk if the dangling gem bit is like a custom thing or not since it could be???#so i switched up to odiles coat and miras gloves and rest remained#realized midway thru YOU WOULDNT BE ABLE TO SEE MIRAS GLOVES THAT WELL???#so i gave siffrin the rope belt from mira instead#as for loop the plan was always to give them miras bow and bonnies bracelet#i revisited just the glasses part for odile briefly then thought a lil more and went#i do not think odile would chuck her glasses#hence the book since i dont think i couldve reasonably removed anything else from her#the pants#the pants.#in terms of identifiability to me the striped pants are fun and striking#hence the immediate next thought in the original notes ASFASDAS#however i do not think isa would just??? chuck his pants like that???? esp in context with the rest of the party?????#but in my minds eye this was a little bit funny so yea ASDASDSA#OKAY. tag talk over it is nap time ASFAS
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crumbleclub · 10 months
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They can talk, in death. Evan has questions. He wants to understand; he needs to know the whole story in order to process and heal. He needs to know why Mike was the way that he was to understand that it wasn't Evan's fault; and he wants to know what happened after he died, what it was like.
Michael wants to answer him. He wants to help; he's obligated to help, after everything he's done to Evan. He prepares his story, opens his mouth to speak...
And nothing comes out.
In which Michael threw himself to the wayside when he decided to save them, so much so that he isn't ready to talk about his own trauma after he dies.
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gxlden-angels · 1 year
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I hate going to Christian-based hospitals. There's a bible verse slide show on the screens that other places usually have medical information graphics and resources on and I just got asked "Do you have a source of peace in your life?" like babygirl I'm here for neurological pain my source of peace is Lidocaine 4% and a heating pad
#The nurse was definitely lgbt because he came back and asked me for my pronouns when I know good and well that's not in the system here#We talked about his cool ass crocs and he was like 'yea I know they're weird questions but I'm required to ask'#Cause they're all like 'do you have a source of peace and joy' and 'do you have a spiritual reason not to partake in any medications here?'#which is nice in concept like wanting to avoid pork-based or gelatin-based products#and things like that#but when it's paired with all of the bible verses and 'extending the healing ministry of christ' being the hospital's slogan#well.....#all of the screens are verses about joy as if this isn't one of the most miserable places to be#they're unfortunately one of the few places in my area tho that treat CFS/ME 😔✌️#It's probably very nice for older people here fighting for their lives#and I understand/respect that#but I've got a therapy appointment after this and I'm gonna go Off#I just realized how tense I got about this Im actively trying to relax my body#my blood pressure was 140/93 sitting and 148/91 standing#which is Not Good#this entire hospital sets off my fight or flight#they're infamously known in my area not to treat transgender patients with respect#both as a community thing and from people talking to me individually#I went on a long tangent about my gender but it was just rambling lol#anyways be gay do crime don't go to christian based hospitals if you can help it#ex christian#religious trauma
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sneakyspades · 5 months
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smiles. grimaces
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vvanessaives · 2 years
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i was tagged by @indorilnerevarine and @denerims to take this quiz and by @florbelles @risingsh0t​ @arklay​ to do this quiz too for some of my ocs so i practically decided to put both together into a single post. thank you so much to everyone!! <3
tagging: feeling a little self conscious of tagging people so whoever wants to do any of these two or both just go ahead and say i tagged you!!
— OCS AS GREEK GODS
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HECATE
double, double toil and trouble. yeah you don't really get much facetime in the myths but you're literally the god of magic and dogs so stay winning. mysterious goth energy, does she really do complete dark rituals or is that just her vibe. no one knows and you're not telling
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HERMES
you literally were born and then invented mischeif. like you were a newborn and you immidiately inbented theivery and then lying. go you. you are the living embodiment of chaotic neutral. Yes people are so annoyed by you sometimes, but you are so unbelievably charming that you get away with everything. who doesn't love a charming rogue
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ARTEMIS
i mean this in the kindest way possible, you give off huge autistic lesbian vibes. oh you're living in the isolated wilderness? hmm. only with women? yes uh huh. if we're following myths as metaphors you have literal trans egg cracking energy so doubly good for you.
                          ─────────────────────────
— OCS CORE
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SILENT ADMISSIONIN
tarot, the fool is numbered 0 – the number of unlimited potential. as the protagonist, he is ever present and therefore needs no number as well as no introduction. the world revolves around you in ways that i can't begin to describe, though you'd shrug it off if i were to begin to explain. i need you to know that time is running out. if you want to get this done, you need to start now. sloth is your greatest enemy in this world, and you can only run so far from the opposition when you start with such a disadvantage. keep your head high, yeah? the kid you were is still in there somewhere. you need to show him that it was worth it.
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CAUTERIZING RAGE
the house has burned around you, and you’re the only one left standing. is it gratifying to be the survivor? fear and anger are weapons in your capable hands, used only to serve your agenda of fighting back when deemed necessary. you're a powerful person, built from the ashes of your despair and your family's mistakes. with time, you'll bloom into someone softer, like the full blossoms that grow each spring and wither away with the leaves in fall. they won't disappear if you take your eyes off of them. you're enough.
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ANIMAL INTUITION
loyalty is the saint you pray to. if you ever were stabbed in the back by your beloved, you'd probably apologize. to your enemies, you're fierce. to your allies, even fiercer. you cultivate a thick inner circle built on promises and devotion, fit only for the best of the best. it's impossible for most to even begin to dissect the type of person you are, owing to your unbreakable emotional walls and confusing philosophies. dream careers? body guard, movie star, unwitting pawn. don't let people get the best of that loyalty.
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FRACTURED GLASS
no amount of orchestrated class is ever going to hide the fact that you’re doomed to be alone. you’re a puppet, you’re a weapon, but most importantly? you’re a fraud. your facade isn’t malicious, but that doesn’t change a thing. everything in your life is in your control now, and you chose to let yourself become stiff and distant. you’re guilty of everything you blame yourself for, and your misfortune is the fault of nobody but yourself. your selfish nature forges you into a man-made monster, so quick to blame and so desperate to escape consequence. i hope that you can become someone you’re proud of soon.
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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...
#the thing abt me is that if u complement me in an academic context i will melt#me walking into every interview: fuck this school. i dont wanna go there. im sad. on one is gonna want me. i can hardly function. fuck this#me walking out of every interview: fuck. the project is cool and they said nice things abt me 😭#fuck. the guy from the lab i interviewed with basically said if u wanna be here i can make it happen. i like ur style and i think ur a#super good candidate 😭 and he quoted my wanky writing bc i got a bit flowery and idealistic lol#and hes on the admissions committee so he was like: yea i can support u if u want just let me kno#and fucking hell the project is cool. but the thing is i think id have to be less of a sad sac bc i think he expects a lot and is hands off#but it is a big institution with a lot of creative ppl and theyre good abt supporting interdisciplinary work#so like the opportunities there would be pretty fucking great i think. hhhhhh god. theres no way i could take the uk one now#fuck. wtf am i gonna do abt that? do i bow out now before ive committed so they have a shot with another person#or is it too late for that bc they already put my name forward to the committee#god dammit. this was the one i was supposed to b like yea no shot am i getting this. and now im like fucking considering it like#the opportunities.... but id have to live in new jersey... it would b closer to home i guess. id b back on east coast time#and i could work with Yellowstone organisms. and i bet the classes r pretty fucking rad education wise#god. decisions. im gonna play Choices by the Hoosiers like a million times#thats what i did wjen i was deciding to go for undergrad. and then i didnt even decide. i was just like... well i dont wanna go to the#place all my classmates r going. i will go 3hrs away. then 12hrs by plane for my masters#fuck. at least it went well. everyone was nice and the 2nd guy i talked to was like:#even if u dont go here. email me if u end up working with zinc and i can help. and i was like 😭#i got a bit rambly with him but whatever he was 15min late so we're even lol#i was way too nervous. but it was ok. but also i dont understand wtf other incoming phd students r like??#like they say im a good candidate and ive got good background and im like ??? what sort of losers r u looking at if u think im good?#i just think maybe what i wanna do is unique and very specific so im like not trying to do just anything. i have standards lol#and apparently im more coherent than i give myself credit for. i talk good sometimes and i have enthusiasm when i dont feel like im dying#god. i was not expecting this. i dont belong at a school working with tech startups like wtf. i come from a place of slightly trash#universities lol. well my undergrad uni wasnt so bad... well i mean the city is the butt of a lot of ohio related jokes tho. im looking at#u klinger. fucking mean streets of toledo. whatever the school im at now is worse. couldnt even keep my boss here smh#anyway what the fuck. and i got a lotta writing done today what the fuck#me being competent???? unheard of. god. imagine if i had my shit together. i could kill god. algae and other scientists would fear me#unrelated
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lavenoon · 1 year
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(I was gonna start this with a scream, and then realized I am, uh, very hyped for these chapters knowing full well it was Sun suffering times kjfhdkgh)
Ok, ok, so first Sunset!
I was laughing so much at the fact that Sun is already so competitive on the caretaking side of things XD Since his love language is acts of service, it's so freaking funny that he's like "Mealtime is my territory, back off partner" in a lighthearted manner kdjhfk And then offering to make breakfast for them, this competitive goof XD
(Sidenote: The worry at the commitment issues dksjhgkjfdhg I could practically hear him worrying about that possibly meaning that dating wouldn't be in table after all (well actually my first thought was marriage but then remembered oh yeah, they aren't even dating yet kdhgkjfdh))
But ahhh, as soon as he mentioned breakfast I knew he wouldn't be back for it. Robin just looking at the clock in worry knowing something must be wrong.
Ohh, and the little reflection about them not really being intimidated of Dawn, but being scared that him taking pride in being a good agent would make him disapprove of them (cough cough, hide reverse AU under the rug, don't let canon Robin in this point of the timeline see how that goes regarding that specifically because uuuuuh, yeah XD, there was an adjustment period in that one)
And ahhhhh I know Moon gives them grief for it later, but I found it so touching that they DID eat something, thinking about how Sun wouldn't want them to work on an empty stomach ;o;, getting better at taking care of themselves because of the people that care about them!!
And gosh, River! I find her so interesting, because she genuinely seems to care for the agents, not just as workers but as people, even though in her position she probably has to be really careful about it. This time there is no option to turn a blind eye, or dance around the subject though. Whether she was implying that getting fired was a very real possibility or not, she did want Dawn to come back to be able to hear about it, better than not having him return at all even if they did.
And omg, Abra Fez is quite harsh. Not to say The Agency TM isn't but they really roughed him up. Ha, the pep talk comment got a chuckle out of me though XD He keeps calm and was sure he would get out on his own, even if he was nervous, which is expected given he is a star agent! (My morbid curiosity makes me wonder if Moon was awake to see the moment they tore his ray off, or if that was what woke him up maybe, since keeping his composure might have been a bit harder on that one gkldhgkl) And awww, Sun. Even when he is the one being rescued, he worries about not letting the backup get hurt. I assume he feels responsible for them, since even if he was taken by surprise, it must sting that he got caught at all.
And gkdfjhgkjh poor Robin must have been so distraught as they searched all the rooms for him, and the reunion was touching, but also I laugh at how you switched the roles compared to the comic you made because Sun was the one swooning, and Moon was like "focus, lover boy". But you know, Sun had a rough day, he can simp as a treat XD
And aaaahhh, when they get back! River really is putting herself on the line for this one, even though she's trying hard to stick by the rules. I imagine it must be a tough decision either way because in a way, when this gets to the higher ups, she would also be questioned on why she didn't separate them at once and instead let this go on. Seems she really has a soft spot for Robin, hehe. And Sun commenting how he needs to learn from them, because it's true! He might be the smooth talker, but Robin is the one that has been at this place for long, so they know how much they can push and how to deal with River too!
After, what caught my attention the most was Moon though. Sun was trying to deflect, maybe automatically because he's on edge from everything, going for banter about how Moon wants to be with Robin now, but Moon is having none of it. He knows what Sun went through, and he's being very direct about him getting a break. It's just... so sweet of him? We've seen them banter over their worries before, but the fact that he was so direct about this got to me dfkñgjhfkj
Hehe, the comment about getting Robin to take care of themselves being the hard part though X3 But ahhh, y/n really needs those days off, since it's obvious such a risky event so close to the last one has shaken them up a lot. Moon is on caring duty tonight.
And maybe Sun will try to make up for the missed breakfast the next day as well haha
All around, awesome couple of chapters Luce! <3
I just realized I can still start answering in the morning, even if I won't have time to finish
So without further ado, let's get into it!
Spoilers for Sunset and Nacreous Cloud under the cut, though if you've read Chaotik's ask it's already too late gfdhsj
It was also a little time for scary agent Dawn, so he got a little bit of revenge for the hurt! Grab and squeeze <3
Sun: I actually cook for you, you know? I don't just slap some cold ingredients together - Y/N: Sun, honey, I'll have a light dinner (sandwiches) and you can spoil me for breakfast, it's not a competition I promise Sun: That breakfast is going to be so good (and then it wasn't </3)
It's not even that he feels territorial about it, a good bunch of it is just him joking around and teasing Moon behind his back! But there is that crumb of fishing for reassurance - "You still like what I make you, right? This isn't going to replace that because it's easier?" And Y/N, in love with two idiots and unaware, so readily replies "I'll eat anything you two make for me whyever would I not"
(The worry is also the thought "Wait, are you not actually oblivious, just pretending to be because you're scared? Do we have to change tactics?" meanwhile Y/N is like "Wait why did I say that he'll think I'm scared of relationships! ... Why is it important that he doesn't think that." and then neither of them actually analyses it more because they get distracted <3)
I had a lot of fun with that whiplash - the joking and soft promises to Y/N alone, waiting, knowing something is wrong... Had to do it, you know? <3
And yeah, definitely! We all know that what we approve and disapprove of is biased - that one person that could say "I like soup!" and we go "Yeah I bet you fucking do" - so Sun now looks at little dangly charms on bloody batons and thinks "ahw they're so adorable" meanwhile in Reverse AU (and oof, Hatchling!) Dawn is just mentally picking it up with two fingers and flinging it far away from him </3 That's how it is sometimes, and so their anxiety isn't quite unfounded! And they think so, too, making it worse
Moon gives them grief for it, but when they get home and quietly explain that they simply couldn't eat more, he softens, too. It's easy for him to only focus on nutrition and the lack of it, because he's never had anxiety twist his stomach into knots and nausea making swallowing anything impossible. They tried, because they didn't want their boys to worry (and because yes, the loved ones override is strong in Robin - something I admittedly projected, but also felt like it would resonate!)
River is my blorbo from my brain fr - I never planned to make her that much of a presence, now I'm so so close to making a ref sheet for her. If I get to work on the Glamrocks, I might just make a reference for her, too gfhdjs She's been a supervisor for a good while - and she's always been Robin's supervisor. She watched a greenhorn agent first butt heads with the established work force (and with her, too - baby Robin didn't have the fear that everyone else had for the "if you have her full attention, you're fucked" supervisor) and then harden at the continued rejection. Rise the ranks, complete missions, and yeah, it's not like they're friends and River felt that need to intervene at the isolation. But when Dusk (and Dawn) show up, and the former starts working with Robin, she sees them warm up to the newbie. By the time Sun moves in with Robin she's already aware that Dusk is a good influence, and together they tackle missions that no one else would dare to complete. They have a few bumps, where they distract each other more than they focus, but all in all? River looks away, and decides to let things play out. She keeps testing them, just a little - fishing questions, until the breaking point in First Aid, when she wonders just how little these three share (she assumed they would find out much sooner), and gives Robin the information they're missing. It's intentional. She still has to follow protocol - Simon Says is not a merciful employer. But she has enough credibility within the agency that her plan can work - so when there's no hiding anymore, she helps her idiot trio. She doesn't want to be involved much more, she's not a mentor - but she cares, and she sees these three care for each other, so so much, and so she helps them in the way she can. Pretty sure if Dawn hadn't taken the lead, she would have suggested the three take the fall, but stay in town - "Let's talk again in a month, after Simon sees what kind of bullshit firing you would invite." She'd frame it as a unpaid leave being sort of its own punishment, so after that they'd be fine. She didn't need to, obviously, they found another workaround - but she's on their side, more than the elusive and distant big boss
The rays sure are sensitive (: I do think Moon woke up with the very sudden, very uncomfortable pain from the dislocated shoulder though. That happens before the ray, when Dawn first got overwhelmed, so he's been there for the entire interrogation, including the very cowardly "Okay, dodging the one still functional taser hand, let's make this hurt" ray ripping. Until then Dawn tried smooth talking (threatening) his way out of the situation, but after that they, uh. They kinda activated the mule kicks, oops. But even so, yeah, Dawn is a star agent for a reason - he would have gotten out on his own, too. It would have taken a bit longer, and wouldn't have been as easy, but he stayed calm and has good motivation. As impressed as he is with the quick reinforcement, he immediately feels responsible - those are agents (as he assumes plural) who are only in danger because of him, and now that he can prevent it, why would he let anything happen to them? Especially if it's just ground support, who doesn't see action as often!
(And then it's just one, feral in their concern neighbor, and he has to process that a little. Oops <3)
Fez is harsh, because they caught a hostile agent in their new (attempted) branch office, someone with a lot of info on their rival agency. They don't hold back - but Dawn doesn't either. He didn't just go down with the first hit obviously, and there's a reason they decided to keep him as immobile as they can. It's the rougher side of their job, and one I haven't touched much before, but it was fun to explore!
So I explained some of River's reasoning already - but yeah, once the even higher ups hear? She'll definitely receive some scrutiny, even if she gives her full reasoning. They did good work together, none of them seemed to realize, and separating them after the address change would have been obvious, too (see Zugunruhe, lmao. River was not the higher up who greenlighted that transfer in that timeline). So that's why she has to be more careful with the cover up, and get some results to also use in her argument.
And yeah, Sun is very used to his own scripts, but he doesn't know River like Robin does! Because Robin spent a lot of time testing the limits (more or less unintentionally), something Dawn never dared and Dusk never cared to do. Gotta sprinkle in some of that senior agent and newbie dynamic still! (Though Dawn and Dusk are pretty established at this point, too)
Moon... Moon was stuck the entire time, during a time when he should be out, and then even later for that talk with River because he's just not good at that kind of stuff, and he has a lot of pent up frustration. He felt useless, barely a backseat driver, stuck in that uncomfortable situation, all while his routine would demand he do something, because it's his time. So when Sun is deflecting Moon has no patience for it. He had to watch, without being able to intervene, for most of it all - he was awake before the switch time because of the pain Sun endured. By the time they're out and safe and got to keep their jobs it's around 2AM, maybe - and he's been up for around half a day already. he felt all those seconds tick by, too. He's feeling restless, and not in the mood to entertain bullshit. Too much pent up concern, and both Sun and Robin get the brunt of it.
I also just... I really wanted some Moon time, after these chapters were very Sun centric. That's how it is sometimes, yes, sometimes one boy gets more attention than the other. But for something so major in the timeline he couldn't be uninvolved, even though that sucked for him (sorry Moon </3)
And yeah, they're all taking that time off, and it'll be some funny "No you just cared on me, now I get to fret" switcheroo as they're all pretty rattled and need to feel in control again. Lots of cuddles that still don't clue Y/N in, but it's fine, we know they'll get there, soon! <3
They definitely get that breakfast though, you know it <3
And ahh, I'm so glad you enjoyed it!! I had so much fun writing it (especially once the dam broke on Saturday - before that, words were kind of hard, though also honestly still fun), and I was very hyped for all these little things - explain how HQ finds out about the identity reveal, set up the introduction for the Glamrocks, Simon says namedrop, and exploring that post reveal pre confession dynamic between the idiot trio! I'm really happy with the reception so far, glad it's hitting well <3
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pussy-ache · 9 months
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i always end up in weird convos with strangers
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vodkaing · 11 months
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sorry for talking about consumption habits and trends i just think its interesting how peoples relationships with media and its messages develop </3
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cowboycunt · 1 year
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well thank fuck
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galariangengar · 11 months
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💭
#I hate constantly being scared and afraid of the people who used to bully me on middle/high school#I hate still feeling this way as an adult and not seeing them for several years now#this also goes for so called ‘friends’ who treated me like shit and gaslit me and tried to make me seem like the bad guy#since I reactivated and been using TikTok for the past like week or so#it’s been finding former ‘friends’ and recommending them to me and it’s been lowkey triggering me tbh#like today it suggested that one guy I knew in middle school and reconnected freshman yr of college but made me REALLY uncomfortable#and also this one girl from high school was was a cunt/bragged about being rich & ‘daddy’s girl’/etc etc#then I got a notification that she looked at my page/ it freaked me out#I blocked the guy/that girl and blocked another girl that used to be my ‘best friend’ in middle/high school#i also put my account on private for now and turned off setting for suggesting contacts and stuff like that#i honestly should find and block people I went to school with and shitty friends if they pop on again on TikTok#… I think when my parents leave next weekend/ I should talk with my two best friends about a lot of things that happened recently#and be honest about how I’ve been feeling/well not completely honest cuz I don’t want to worry them but yea…#I hate that I honestly can’t access or afford help for my mental health#or hell even just fucking talk to someone about everything without a session costing a fucking arm and a leg#jazz uses curse! 💜
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keeps-ache · 1 year
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i've been singing the same 9 words from a song all day. spinning in circles babyyy
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distantwave · 1 year
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#really think I actually need to find a psychiatrist one of these days#not to quote my shitty roomie but I really don’t have to live like this#I am. doing not as bad as I have at other points. but I am definitely not doing great I would say#like I mean things are fine at the moment. but there’s definitely the edge of a precipice kinda feeling to it#like I do really enjoy my job that’s a really good thing for me actually and I finally found a place to live so that’s excellent but#I do REALLY think I need to get help before I move out. which realistically isn’t going to happen bc it’s less than a month away#but uh. I am. not going to do well on my own admittedly. sure I was practically living on my own the last few months in the last place#just bc no one would speak to me. but there were still other people in the house. I think my potential for getting really bad again is#perhaps going to be alarmingly high if I’m on my own without a roommate or a therapist/physiatrist to figure shit out#I don’t want it to take away how excited I am to live at my new place but I genuinely should not be on my own. like practically I’m fine#it’s mentally I won’t do well with it I think#on a totally different note tho if I did ever end up getting diagnosed with what I think I’ve got going on it opens up a ton of#diners drive ins and dives jokes for me lmaoo#so that’s something I guess lol. but yea anyways idk what to do really. am bad at bridging what I can bring up to people and what I can’t#as that is literally one of the defining reasons my relationship with her fucking crashed and burned. so idk when/what/how much I can#talk about things anymore. went from telling no one anything and it completely ruining my closest friendship. to telling her everything and#it ALSO ruining our friendship. so my grasp of what’s appropriate is evidently nonexistent ya know. but I do need to talk to someone bc#I am perhaps doing less than optimal ya know? and I don’t really want to go back to my last therapist I feel like it’s been too long#don’t know what my plan of action is here but this was slightly cathartic at least
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glitternsparkles · 2 years
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went to a party and all my college friends were there and all of them were so excited to see me and their energy was so amazing i didn't realize how much i missed them . feeling so Loved and Seen and Wanted like this is love this is love this is love like life is so great again actually
#im so happy man#im so so so so so so fucking happy#life is literally so good and i love my friends and life is just so good. it is so good.#like they made me feel so loved and seen and valued and i felt like i coukd be myself again after 2 months of not seeing them#and one of the people there we got to talking and they wanted sushi so i was like do u wanna go get some#but kroger was closed so he decided he just wanted waffle house so we just spontaneously drove to waffle house#and we got everyone food and went through one of those questionnaires to get to know each other better to pass the time#and we got to talking and we're so similar#and then before we went back in we were like we shoulf make out so we tried but he was bad at kissing#like he said he was rly shy to get intimate but he wanted to make out w me bc im hot but he was shy so he was holding back#so then i was like oh we dont have to and then i gave him a lil peck and we went back in and gave good to everyone#and then i left and i blasted my most personal playlist on the way homr w the windows down#and just thought about how good life is and its so good im so grateful to be alive right now#and im so grateful for having friends like this#and also hes a few months younger than me😈😈😈😈😈 im a cougar core#but yea older me would have been so embarassrd bc the kiss was Not going well but now i just brushed it off#like it's a bad kiss . it's not big deal#and he kept overthinking and i was trying to like comfort him but yea he was so shy it was cute#but i wanted to kiss someone at this party and i did ! manifestation core#anyways life is so good right noe and i love being unconditionally loved and everything is so good and i love myself so much#like i need to keep these people close to me bc they make me feel so fucking hapoy man#dear god#life is good life is great everything is so amazing and cool and awesome#:)#and also he was so hot lowkey like his face structure is so unique and he dresses so fucking cool but hes so shy and#overthinks everything like his personality does NOT match his looks but hes cute . hehe
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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 years
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#had my 1st meeting with a potential adviser for a phd project#i think it went well. he was excited thst i was interested in the specific papers i listed my my email#and his lab does some super cool stuff. and he seems like a nice guy#so thats all exciting. i think the lab is only like a few degrees away from being an outstanding pick#ugh but its so close tho. like biochem and Evolutionary genertic stuff. id probably do a degree in ecology and evolution#and the department is evolutionary genetics focused. which sounds crazy cool. like i dont wanna hang with agriculture ppl. bring me the#Evolutionary biologists. plus they have some nasa ties and a big astrobiology guy is coming back to the department#and if i go. id prob get to do some work at [redacted] national park! which is an even bigger deal than the work ive done at [redacted]#national park! it would be a big change tho. more cold and snowy than the literal desert#so like im def gonna apply. and hopefully get in and hopefully visit. and we'll see what happens#im still looking at my options but this one seems pretty damn good to me#fingers crossed 🤞 i suppose#unrelated#god. it really seems like the lab is a good fit tho. like when i talk to Ecologists im like haha yea im not an ecologist#bc they wanna look for broad patterns in a big system. and im like nah fuck that. i wanna kno how this specific thing works#which i think is more his labs vibe and is why im currently not having fun with the stuff i do rn#ah we'll see where i find myself in a year#i would prob still be equally far from home tho lol. just at higher lattitude
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