#I’m just so genuinely exhausted

[watchyourbuck]

Wip Wednesday | A.R.C.A.N.E.3

(snippet from upcoming chapter 4)

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Eddie woke up to water being thrown on his face. He gasped for air and spat out what had gone inside his mouth, then opened his eyes, moving frantically, but he couldn’t see. Blindfolded.

“Stay put, Voider,” ordered a man in a rough voice.

Eddie’s senses were heightened. He struggled against the restrains on his hands and feet, but the knots were tight. Camp of Voiders, he thought.

The man moved around the room, his steps resonating against the walls. This couldn’t be on the surface. He was underground. Somewhere underground.

Buck.

“Where is he?” Eddie asked, trying to force his wrists apart. “Where is he!”

Read on ao3

tagged by @spotsandsocks @honestlydarkprincess @hoodie-buck @jesuisici33 @exhuastedpigeon @wikiangela @disasterbuckdiaz @diazsdimples & @tizniz I haven’t been able to read your works yet but I will asap! Thank you for your love & patience 🥺🩷

tagging in return @lover-of-mine @wildlife4life @tsunamibuckley @loserdiaz @puppyboybuckley @sunshinediaz @spagheddiediaz @theotherbuckley @kitteneddiediaz @steadfastsaturnsrings @honestlyeddie @evanbegins @eddiiediaz @eddiebabygirldiaz @eddie---diaz @devirnis @bigfootsmom @smilingbuckley @hippolotamus @daffi-990 @your-catfish-friend @911-on-abc @monsterrae1 @thewolvesof1998 @bucksbackwardcap @cal-daisies-and-briars @nmcggg @urfactual & @giddyupbuck ✨ (let me know if you wished to be removed!)

#wip wednesday #we’re all gonna pretend I haven’t been missing from these tag games for like a month now #I’m just so genuinely exhausted #the bar exam is taking every piece of me #I’m incapable rn #but I write when I can #and I’m going through my tbr list but I’m also a slow reader so bare with me #buddie #911 fox #911 #911 tv show #eddie diaz #evan buckley #evan buck buckley #buck x eddie #buck and eddie #911 abc #buddie fic #buddie fanfic #buddie fanfiction #buddie wip

[shorthaltsjester]

free my complex female character, she did the same thing as complex male characters but the fandom takes Any analysis of her actions/choices/motivations that doesn’t strip her of all of her agency in bad faith and claims that only misogynists would dare to critique the things that they’ve noticed in her character because she’s a woman, completely ignoring the over-presence of discourse about similarly traited male characters in their fandom.

#exhausted by people categorizing CRITIQUE. not even genuine hate just literally basic analysis of imogen’s character #as a) hate at all but b) misogynistic simply because… they assume the person like caleb and percy uncritically like #i love imogen and i love her because she’s riddled with complexity that gives reason for her to be unlikeable #the shit ashton says makes me want to tear out my hair and i could write analysis on why but they’re still one of my favourite characters #i enjoy caleb but watching him infuriated me because of his self interest which is a coherent trait of his but is a tiring one #similarly with percy of love his pretentious Smartest In The Room shit but sometimes it meant he treated others more poorly than necessary #but i’m not unpacking all of that just so i have some fandom mandated right to say that i think there’s an aspect of a female character #that is imperfect in the human sense #because like. i will continue to call imogen’s self interested until the world burns and the moon shatters. because she is. #the only reason her choice to do good is compelling at all is because the choice to do otherwise is so tangible #it isn’t a Mistake or Fault that she’s self interested. it’s by design #like. she reaches towards the storm in curiosity in her sleep. but then she fights back when she’s awake #that’s it #that’s the dynamic. that’s what’s compelling #but no ur right fandom. let’s instead all agree that imogen is actually just intrinsically good #and take away all agency and complexity and humanity from her #and instead slap a sticker of Morally Good and enjoy the caricature of her where she’s made to fit into the imagine of #the latest aesthetic ad for diarrhoea medication #imogen temult #critical role #inspired as always by dumbass twitter posts that i’m subjected to because of school n work #the worst part is i do like the laudna n imogen dynamic in the stagnancy where it is but so much of that fandom is so clear in their erosion #of both characters actuality to suit the picture of Ship Tropes #like fuckin. so much of imogen’s fanart in imodna making her fat which as a fat person great love to see it #not so much when it’s clearly to make her short n stout against laundas tall n lanky. #anyway

[quins-makeshift-menagerie]

Gentle reminder that my kofi link is in my pinned post. While The Other Q’s ER trip won’t financially destroy us it’s still going to be a big hit on top of having to get some major repairs done on the car before winter hits

#I #genuinely hate doing this #I wanted to open commissions instead #so people would at least get something in return that feels worth it #but i haven’t been mentally in the right spot to take those for months and this isn’t helping #at this point doing anything more than silly doodles to try and keep my spirits up feels exhausting #just gotta #hope things will be okay with Q and the car and everything else #sorry I’m just not doing so hot either #I’m still dealing with withdrawals from stopping my medication and now I’m getting a cold from sleep deprivation again #fun times #I’m so tired

[lagosbratzdoll]

I find it odd and by odd I mean racist that ever since that stupid show cast the Dragon Twins as Black girls, there's been an uptick in Jace/Sara content/shipping.

Before the dumpster fire started, reasonable people agreed that Sara Snow was not real, but now you cannot go five minutes in Jace or Baela’s tag without seeing someone wish they'd include Sara Snow in the show.

They say it'll deepen Jace’s character and make him “interesting”, whatever that means. The problem with this assertion is that Jace is already plenty interesting, he led the war councils while his mother grieved, and he recruited the blacks' most important allies. Allies who remained steadfast even after his mother's and his own demise.

Furthermore, Jace has existing relationships in his life that the show could explore to delve into his connection with bastardy. Three of whom are canonically Black, by the way.

So, the question arises: what unique perspective or insight can Sara Snow provide to Jace's struggle with his bastard status that Nettles, Addam, and Alyn cannot?

#i was going to leave it alone because i’m tired of talking about antiBlackness in general but i saw a post that annoyed me in Baela’s tag. #this fandom is so racist #it is genuinely exhausting that i cannot even scroll a characters tag in peace #it is telling that most of y’all skip all the canonical Black bastards to attach yourselves onto a white character whose in world existence #is debated #how would reducing baela to the other woman in her own relationship help her character? #would that not just repeat the disgusting precedent that the show runners set with laena #why can’t she be loved and cherished and missed and treated with tenderness #house of the dragon #baela targaryen #jace velaryon #nettles #addam velaryon #alyn velaryon #sara snow #had to get that out of my system #back to ignoring asoiaf discourse as best i can

[algrenion]

I feel really cruel because all of my friends online are always asking me how I am and what’s up and I’m just sort of sitting here rotting and pretending I’m invisible.

#I wanna joke about it. but I’m genuinely just so sorry honestly like #I’m just so tired #it’s exhausting to even say hello most days #I hardly talk to anyone anymore irl or online #I blame uni… but if we’re being real I’m just really not well hhh

[mochiwrites]

blegh

#delete later #this is me just yelling into the void for a moment #but god I think I need to look into doing smth about my meds #:))) been on a steady mental health decline since at LEAST august #and it’s only gotten worse since the new year started cries #I’m trying to do homework and I can’t even focus on it #struggling so bad #but I don’t. trust anyone to actually talk and I’ve been pulling closer to myself #so I just bury myself in school and writing and distractions (there aren’t many) #I don’t know I think I’m tired #really tired of how things have been #how alone I feel #life has genuinely felt exhausting lately #all of my relationships feel so superficial with the exception of like. a small few #I want deeper connections but lately I feel like I’m just not built for friendship #it really feels like I’m just not supposed to have friends because I’m not a good one or I’m not a good person and I just Exist #in loneliness #and that hurts SO bad #can it please get better already #please #between online and irl I am at my limit T-T #ANYWAYS. back to being productive and doing stuff

[wmnylander]

looking at the leafs fanbase & realising that most people have never watched a team sport before becoming a leafs fan and finally realising that’s why people act the way they do.

#morgan rielly i am side-eyeing you #this isn’t a shot it’s just mind boggling to me how some people genuinely do not believe this comes down to being a business #at the end of the day. #the fact the core have lasted as long as they have without the success to back it up would NEVER happen in any other sport/team #but because it’s happening in toronto & most people don’t know how team sports on a broad scale works #this is just seen as normal. its not lol. #most executives give you a window of like maybe 3 years max to try and get a championship once you have good players & if it doesn’t happen #someone or multiple people get traded like thats just how it works #i think people overreact because its toronto but people overreact because they’re exhausted theyve put up with almost a decade of this core #with literally nothing but 1 singular playoff round to show for it #so forgive people for reading into it #i’ve been here over 12 months only and i’m concerned i cannot imagine what it’s like for seasoned leafs fans

[sentientsky]

in my mind, we’re all just hanging out in a giant sandbox, digging holes and making sandcastles and parallel playing and just generally being weird and silly (affectionate) together

#i might be overtired. just a little #words r hard. u get what I mean #our brains r talking to one another. I’m not high I swear. #did someone already make a post like this??? i genuinely can’t remember for the life of me. if they did lmk so I can credit properly lol #not good omens #but also yes??? #good fucking night. for real this time lol #if u guys see me on here in less than 7 hrs. just like. tell me to go away or something lol #u can tell I’m exhausted bc i use the term lol one million thousand billion trillion times

[lumiereandcogsworth]

all The Crown fans love to do here is complain about The Crown and how inaccurate The Crown is and how disappointing The Crown is. maybe you should stop watching The Crown and just leave it alone. have you considered that it is not required of you to watch The Crown? do you know that you do not have to engage with The Crown?

#perhaps i should just unfollow the tag lmao #i’m just genuinely so exhausted. no fandom has ever been more whiney or irritating #‘oh no the historical drama is inaccurate’ yeah no shit dumbass. they want views ! not accuracy ! #literally every post in the tag these days is just spouting off how inaccurate and bad the recent seasons have been and i’m TIRED OF IT #i’m just in general sick of negativity in the tag of the thing one is being negative about #don’t you have anything better to do with your time than shit on things? that’s what the bathroom is for #the crown #lyd says things

[adashofniallandasprinkleoflunacy]

talking to leyla? does that mean we're getting more ysijwa eventually??

PLSKSMSKSK I talk with leyla all the time, just cause we haven’t updated the fic in a while doesn’t mean we stopped being friends 😭 we were friends before ysijwa was even a thought 😭 ���😭

#I miss writing more than anything though #like it genuinely makes me sad bc it was one of my favorite hobbies and the fact that nowadays I’m so exhausted and burnt out that I’ll #open a doc to write and will literally just stare at the page blankly waiting for the motivation I used to have to just magically come back #if i think abt it too much I’ll end up in a straitjacket 💀 #I miss my characters and the feeling of posting something new and just providing you guys with content like I used to #sOMEBODY SEDATE MEEEEEEE

[coldbug]

really feeling bogged down by the horrid death shamble of late stage capitalism ( ´_ゝ`) brb throwing my phone into the lake

#genuinely not being online as much would help my mental state lol #everything just continues to get worse and worse huh. sucks to be an old enough adult now to think back a decade ago #being a teenager. and. everything was just actually so much better and more hopeful feeling? #what the fuck. i’m exhausted

[spoofyleaf]

MK doesn’t want to be a hero to save the world, he just want to have fun and keep his friends safe. In this essay I will-

#I genuinely feel like now that he realized what being a hero is #he doesn’t actually /want/ to be a hero #like rn he’s only doing ‘world saving hero stuff’ bc either it’s to keep his friends safe or bc he feels obligated to #he blames himself for everything even when it wasn’t anything to do with him. so he’ll do what he can to fix his ‘mistakes’ #he just wants to go on silly adventures #not have the literal universe rest in his hands #it’s 5am I’m tired and I’m gonna go to bed #but have this fun thought #like okay yea he wants to be a hero and help people #but it’s more fun to think this way me thinks #idk I’m exhausted and ramblin #Spoofy rambles

[politemagic]

after today i feel the need to crawl into a hole and not come out for three to five business days.

#the anxiety might be winning tonight gang #actually so wild to me that i can have nothing but positive interactions all day yet still find ways to twist them #it’s actually exhausting to make everyone in the world hate you so much. why can i not just accept that MAYBE im tolerable? #i’m trying so hard to just push through it but it’s so hard to tell if people are being genuine #especially via text. and ESPECIALLY ppl i don’t know in real life. it’s hard enough irl it’s a nightmare online #(can we believe it took 23 years for someone to think i might be autistic?) #em’s ponderings

[wantbytaemin]

good god.. been dealing with THINGS. very many of them

#i worked from home this whole week and only went in today and it was expectedly super exhausting and not productive #but i also worked the whole weekend too and i am so totally spent like burnt out emotionally and on every other level LMAO. anyway #i came home to roommate and she was like oh I was hoping you’d want to go for a walk and i was like listen my love i am not in shape to #even breathe-in breathe-out right now without falling apart and she was like ok got it! and went for the walk herself and she brought back #my favorite sour candies and my favorite watermelon cider and . oh my god get this i’ve been meaning to replace the battery on my AirTag i #keep in my car bc I always park it where the fuck ever and forget #and she actually got me the AirTag as a bday gift but i digress. anyway i always forget which battery i need and she went and bought it for #me and said this is to ‘refill your battery hehe’ and i’ve also . been told some other things like borderline incredible things (positive) #(not by her but well. someone else. shan’t say it and such) #and it’s just sooooo much all at once i feel like i’m exploding i need to decompress for one thousand years #like this is mostly positive trust me i just have not been shown love for so direly insanely long and now im receiving it in a genuine way #and idk how to even deal with it or how to express my gratefulness like how do you. how do you begin to give all of that back im dizzy

[godblooded]

man i wish i didn’t… feel horribly inconsequential and hollow.

#ooc. o kaptain. #[i’m just… beyond exhausted and I have no spoons left for anyone or anything. I haven’t eaten since like. 2. I have been meaning to smoke #the same joint and I… just still have it next to me. I’m just overthinking everything rn because the adhdepression is wicked bad rn. I’ll be #fine honestly I’m just… I don’t know. I feel like I could disappear and it genuinely wouldn’t matter. I absolutely fucking despise this #feeling. I hate randomly tearing up for no good goddamn reason. tomorrow is treatment day for my aunt and it’s SUPER early in the morning so #I’m gonna go crash. love you guys. 💖] #negative / #cancer mention / #medical mention /