#actually u know what this guy need to get pegged by a queen

[hijackalx]

FEMALE BG3 COMPANIONS TURN ONS/KINKS +18

MALE BG3 COMPANIONS

NON-COMPANIONS/NON-ORIGIN COMPANIONS

SHADOWHEART

HARD DOM

ISN’T THIS OBVIOUS i feel like she's so into being the dominant one regardless of whether she's on top or bottom. like dominatrix vibes for real. and she can be really mean too, like step on u/spit on u/whip u type of mean 😹😹 (me next) something about u being at her command is just sooo hot. she loves that you’ll do anything for her

WAXPLAY

i think she'd want this done to u AND her. like she's the type to pour it down ur chest or neck while she's riding u. i can't decide if she'd like to use colorful candles or all black candles 🤔 dark purple would be sexy actually. she likes how u flinch when it touches u. BUT she also likes how it feels on herself (that's probably how she gets off seeing it happen to u cuz she knows how good it feels 🤤). might tease u by pouring it on herself and making u watch

LEATHER/LATEX

yeah like full BDSM gear and all that lol. i think she would like the full body latex suits i dont actually know what they're called (shocker i know) but think velma in the one live action scooby doo movie LMAO

DOUBLE PENETRATION

i feel like she would be into either being tag-teamed herself or tag-teaming u with a strap lol. but also it doesn't have to involve another person it could be u riding a toy while also sucking off her strap and vice versa. i think if ur the one getting fucked she'd want another dom person to join because she gets off on seeing u be submissive

BODY WORSHIP

she would 100% want u to treat her like the princess she is. praise her body/figure and tell her how much u love it. leave kisses all over, maybe fuck in front of a mirror so u can actually show her how much u love her body. she’d probably do the same for u just a bit more nasty LMAO like the shit she says will be intense

LAE'ZEL

PETPLAY

OKAY this one i had dragonborns in mind lol but also it could work for anybody. like u guys can't tell me she wouldn't be into collaring/leashing u and having u do as she asks. will call u things like "pet" or "pup"

BRAT TAMING

now i know everybody thinks that SHE would be the one taming U but i honestly think it's the other way around OOP. like i think she likes when someone takes charge and pushes her around.... like she's just dying for somebody to come by and force her to take down that hard exterior of hers. u just have to prove urself to her first is all

BONDAGE

once she trusts u she will want u to tie her up. maybe would be into shibari? like i mean intense bondage. full body. she'll call u out on some pussy shit if u hold back and go easy on her 😹 she definitely wants it to hurt too and to be able to see marks/bruises left behind from it after

SIZE DIFFERENCE

if anyone is a size queen it's lae'zel LMAO. but this also plays into the whole brat taming/proving urself thing like if ur big and physically intimidating then she's more likely to respect u. she just likes the pain from trying to make u fit too though. and the accomplished feeling afterwards lol

PRAISE

i see her as somebody who is lowkey insecure. like she needs constant validation otherwise she feels like she's not doing good enough. so let her hear u !!!! let her know how good she's doing and how good she feels. tell her that she's beautiful and that ur proud of her. literally anything just don't be dead silent she will get up and walk away 💀

KARLACH

PEGGING

she wears the strap ALMOST exclusively. sometimes she'll make exceptions but most of the time she just prefers to be the one doing the fucking. this goes for AMAB and AFAB obviously. she loves the way it feels to be able to make u feel good and fuck u to the point of cumming. i don't really think it's a control thing she just likes to please u (and she usually has too much energy to bottom lol)

SIZE DIFFERENCE

LOVVVESSSS how big she is compared to u. like it makes her feel so strong and capable. particularly interested in how big her hands are compared to urs and also how easy it is to balance u on her thigh. she'll want to pick u up and fuck u, it's one of her favorite positions. she just loves how easy it is to manhandle u in general

MOMMY DOM

i think this would start out as a joke and then snowball into an actual kink of hers lol. she's usually a soft dom when it comes to this. as in lots of praise and saying stuff like "cum for momma baby". i don't really see her being a hard dom (maybe on special occasions?)

LINGERIE

if u dress up in lingerie for her she will actually LOSE IT. like it makes u look so dainty and sexy at the same time. she loves the ones that have the thigh garters because she likes to play with them. i think she really likes the feeling of the lace but also adores the fluffy ones too

EDGING

she likes this done to the both of u. i feel like she'll try to prolong the sex for as long as she can or maybe tease u/get u horny in public and leave u like that for soooo long, that way when u guys finally fuck it's like EXPLOSIVE from being so pent up lmao. BUT she also likes when u do it to her too. i can see this being especially exciting for her because she's so raring to go all the time 😹 it's like a fun little challenge

MALE BG3 COMPANIONS

NON-COMPANIONS/NON-ORIGIN COMPANIONS

#bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #karlach x reader #karlach headcanons #shadowheart #shadowheart x reader #lae’zel #lae’zel x reader #shadowheart headcanons #lae’zel headcanons #my headcanons

[shenanigans-and-imagines]

Nsfw alphabet (all of it) for Loki? Also, l love ur star wars ocs 💕

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

He praises you to high heaven after sex.  His words come low and soft as he cleans up you telling you, in so many different way, how perfect you are.  His silver tongue doesn’t stumble once.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

He loves your neck.  It’s so easy to tease you with just a simple brush of his lips against that particular part of your skin. An open canvas for him bite and mark as he wishes.  And it’s the perfect fit for his hand to squeeze as he fucks you.

As for himself, he likes his hands. He knows you appreciate the length and dexterity of his fingers.  Not to mention it’s where most of his true power resides.  They are magic hands, after all. ;)

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He leaves such a mess when he cums.  He loves cumming all over your skin; stomach, back, face, tits, it doesn’t matter.  It’s his way of marking you. He’ll even take his fingers like a brush and paint it all over your body.

Even when he cums inside you, he still manages to leave his mark. He’ll spread you open, watching in fascination as a mix of your cum and his own drip down your inner thigh.  He likes to take his fingers then, and spread is down your skin before licking it with his tongue.  He’s a complete slut when it comes to cum.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He doesn’t have many to be honest.  He’s very open about what he wants with you.  After a thousands years or so, you learn that there’s no shame in sharing with someone you trust.

But, there have been a few instances he’s has to keep himself from moaning “mommy”.  He’s not sure where it came from and that’s one kink he’s does not want to explore.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Thor might be more bombastic, but Loki has perfected the art of whispering into an ear and making the hearer weak at the knees. So yes, he’s been around the block a few times with a variety of partners.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

It really depends on his mood.

If he’s in a dominating mood then he loves taking you from behind, your back pressed against his chest and his hand clasped around your throat.

If he wants to be dominated, then please tie his wrists to the bedpost and ride his face. He wants your cum.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He runs the gambit from emotional and intense to a sexy, but fun romp in the hay. There are moments he can’t help, but make a joke or a smug comment at your expense. It keeps things unpredictable.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He actually keeps up a pretty close shaved down there. Not that there was much there in the first place. Perhaps the first hint he wasn’t Asgardian.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

As I said before, he runs a wide range of emotions when you’re fucking.

But, when he is in the mood or his emotions become too overwhelming, he can be extremely intimate. Sometimes it’s praises as he makes love to you, wondering how he could be so lucky. Other times it’s desperate and pleading, clinging to your body and begging you not to leave.

And then there are days he just wants to have a bit of fun.

You’re never too sure what you’re going to get on an given day.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Not as often as you’d think. If he’s in the mood, he prides himself on being able to find a partner to satisfy him. Using his own hand feels childish and a little embarrassing. So, he won’t do it unless he’s really desperate.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

God, it would be easy to lists the stuff he isn’t into.

First and foremost, he’s 110% a switch. Yes he’s got mad Big Dick Daddy Dom energy when he wants to and there are a number of fantasies he has that involve tying you up and using you as his personal fuck toy.

But if you’re telling me this same disaster theater nerd twink doesn’t also allow his partners to peg him on the reg, then you are dead wrong.

That all being said, I’d also like to add exhibitionism to the list. There are times you swear he wants to get caught when he fucks you against the bookshelves in the library, or in the gardens or even against the one of the pillars in the palace. If it weren’t for his illusions, you might have.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

The most common place is your bedroom. That’s where you can pull out all the stops and really take your time.

But as I said above, he does take a certain thrill out of almost being caught. If he were being honest, he’s say the library was near the top of his favorite places to fuck.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Assertiveness is certainly top of the list. Knowing that you want him and no one else, combined with your confidence can lead him pleading at your feet.

Jealousy is also a motivator. If he sees another man trying to move in on you, that’s his cue to pull you into the nearest empty room and fuck you senseless. Alternatively, if he sees you getting jealous of someone hitting on him, then he’ll pull you aside and show you in every way he can that he is yours.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Infanalization, or really any age play where either of you is expected to act like a child. It’s insulting to him for one thing, since he can take some sexual humiliation, but he draws the line at not being at least considered a man.

As for you, he wants to be with an adult plain and simple. He finds it tedious and insipid otherwise.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Again, split right down the middle. There are nights that all he wants to do is tie your wrists to the bed posts as he buries himself between your legs, making you cum and cum again on his tongue until you can’t move.

Other times, he wants to pull your hair and fuck your face, making you take every inch of him before cumming down your throat.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Leans more towards the fast and rough, averaging at about 65% of the time. But for the other 35%, he takes his sweet time.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Yes and please. Preferably during a ball or some other formal event where he fucks you in an empty corridor before eventually rejoining the party like nothing happened.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

All the time. He’ll trying anything once.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He’s usually good for one to three rounds. But those rounds can last anywhere from 15 minutes a piece or a full hour depending on why you’re doing. So, stamina is never an issue.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

A whole trunk full. Like I said, he’ll try anything once.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

All the god damn time. If a party is particularly dull, he’ll spend the whole night teasing you. It’s a game to see how fast he can make you break.

There have been times he’s teased you right to the edge only to leave you tied to the bed and aching for hours before finishing the job.

And don’t even get me started on him trying to make you jealous of purpose. He’s such a drama queen.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He can be quiet if he really needs to be. If you’re having sex in a semi-public space he at least has the sense to keep it to himself; grunting and whispering dirty words against your skin.

When you’re in private however, all bets are off. He runs his mouth, he moans, he growls, and he curses like it’s going out of style.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He can talk a big game with one night stands, but his favorite kind of sex is with a consistent partner. He wants to be desired, but more than that, he wants to be chosen and chosen consistently. Having one person there every day choosing to be with him is everything.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Not an overly thick or heavy cock, but certainly longer than average and it’s width proportional to his size. A nice, pretty seven inch dick.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

It’s strange, but when it’s just him and one night stands, his sex drive isn’t insane. He’s not going to get a head ache if he doesn’t have sex and dry spells don’t bother him as much.

But when he’s actually in a relationship, his sex drive is off the charts. I think he ultimately like the idea of someone wanting and choosing him consistently. It’s one of his biggest turn ons. So, you guys are having sex at least every other night.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

It takes him a while to doze off. He likes to make sure you comfortable and clean. He’ll massage your muscles if you need it and talk the night away. He doesn’t want to miss a moment if he can help it.

#loki #loki x reader #loki odinson #loki odinson x reader #marvel #mcu #marvel imagine #mcu imagine #lemon

[despiteherself]

somewhat spoiler-y thoughts under the cut. don’t keep reading if you don’t want to see stuff about httyd3

okay. so overall i actually enjoyed httyd3 (surprising; i know). i do have lots and lots of complaints but the stuff i liked was exciting and interesting enough that i sort of just blacked out the bad stuff. and i’m going to love picking that stuff apart bc boy was there some cringy shit. especially if you don’t like hiccstrid, their scenes with actual relationship talk were awkward and wooden and god. the ending was SO :/ 

actual spoilers from here on out. you’ve been warned. 

grimmel was a lot more compelling as a villain. they sort of gave him a backstory thing and it kind of ruined it a bit for me bc it was basically “i killed a night fury as a boy and my village loved me for it so i killed all of them” but idk something about it was lacking and i was like. oh. did you guys not care enough to flesh this one out. actually, writing it down it sounds way better motivation than when he actually said it even tho it’s basically the same thing.

the deathgrippers were being controlled! grimmel was using their venom to mind control them, so any “alpha talk” didn’t get through to them and they did exactly what grimmel wanted. 

and hiccup didn’t give a shit lol. these dragons were constantly being drugged via needles in their head/neck and being forced to hunt and attack and carry grimmel around and hiccup didn’t even feel a little bit sorry for them or express any pain. the whole movie was kinda “wow ppl don’t deserve dragons we need to save them” but he didn’t express any empathy for dragons being used? not many were shown in this movie to be used, and even less that hiccup saw, but idk the whole “let the things you love go!” didn’t congeal well. 

further more, he made several terrible decisions for the entirety of berk, including running away to find the hidden world, which they had no proof even existed and absolutely kept walking exactly into everything grimmel wanted, but when ruff did it (after she was “captured” and let go she flies straight back the place they’ve settled leading grimmel back to new berk) it felt like it was being played as a WAY worse thing. like she was an idiot for doing it, and it was just! hiccup. every decision you’ve made has been panicked and blind and made your position worse and worse. 

gobber, valka and eret all get a little screen time, and they all play the naysayer stoick part? like “hiccup this is dangerous” and hiccup completely ignores them. them: hiccup we have advice hiccup: ok cool im not listening and i don’t want to hear it. they don’t even get to really explain their points of view ??????? 

valka’s other stuff is “oh we might have been followed leaving berk” and then her being all “astrid do u still love and believe in my son?????” what “he’ll listen to u” uhm ??? and no one else i get? ?/ they literally do not talk except about hiccup

gobber’s scene where he tells hiccup to marry astrid is so weird and awkward and only tuffnut yelling “oh no not the m word!” had anything that made it better. noah fence but astrid was all “that’s weird and awkward of you” and tells hiccup she thinks they’re “not ready for marriage” and the idea is silly and it 100% sounds like she’s not interested in him at all. and he’s obviously super invested and he’s all “haha maybe you can have snotlout” she makes “jokes” about snotlout being into valka. it was.... 

also. he ONLY mentioned snotlout when saying there’s other guys and idk. it ..... idk now i think about it it maybe feels the “joke” is kinda who would want snotlout which :/ but i guess means tuff and fishlegs are valid suitors? i don’t know 

hiccup in the whole was pretty weak tbh. like he didn’t stand out for me and most of his plot felt like it had a bunch of good ideas but they struggled putting it together. it’s like when u see a fic and u love the general idea but the execution is not how u would, and they go on and it’s like. i really really wouldn’t have 

they weirdly anthropomorphise toothless and then also. have him act like a dog and i found it disconcerting 

the light fury is genuinely super blobby and ugly and i cna’t believe they made me watch SO much of “uwuw sexy seductress” content and toothless being a complete airhead who licks a rock to “practice” for it. was weird and i was uncomfortable. 

also astrid is all “wow toothless has a girlfriend its so cute !!!!!!!” and they watch him watch other dragons doing mating dances and hiccup is like ‘i never pegged you for a romantic, like never” like get a fuckign hint !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! she never kisses you on the cheek. astrid expressing sentiment cause she thinks something is romantic but never for your relationship is telling you A LOT about it 

honestly. they don’t do anything to make me convinced in ANY WAY that astrid is actually into him and wants to marry him for real. at their wedding she is SO wooden and when they kiss hiccup brings his hand up but astrid is just STANDING there,,, and they look so blank. it’s so. 

also. i was right astrid was mostly just a prop for hiccup’s story and she barely interacts with anyone that isn’t hiccup or valka, and when it’s valka it’s about hiccup. 

aside from toothless, and a little bit of stormfly, the gang’s dragons are mostly just. in the background and don’t really have anything to do with anything

behind everything there were this warlords, i didn’t pick up names and apparently they were the ones who were funding drago or whatever? and they call grimmel in bc he cares about killing night furies and are hoping that it’ll mean they get all the dragons. it was kinda. i sort of liked the idea but i felt it was shoved in, and they just mentioned drago to make it seem like it was planned when they came out of nowhere. and idk not planned at all. like an idea that was good but they didn’t edit everything to make sure it fit. a lot of stuff felt kind retcon-y like apparently stoick was “obsessed with finding the hidden world” and he even mentions in a flash back that it’s not the nest they’re looking for in httyd1 so it’s so weird like. and there was this ~journals~ stoick had about it and it’s just! they never ever mentioned this before gfhsdfjhdfgjdfgfdg guys. that’s so fucking messy and kinda annoying. in the grand scheme this retconning isn’t too much, but it’s enough that it’s like. none of this was planned and i can tell and instead of making it match up you just bluster through like “actually this always happened” as if u think i’m a dumbass who will just blindly believe whatever you tell me instead of a long time fan with a personal involvement.i know some of u read my blog,,, come on   

i didn’t cry at all like lol. i had fun but i wasn’t emotional. 

no characters die don’t worry

ruff was PERFECT and everything she did was wnoderful and i LOVE her so much! she got to speak A LOT and she’s all “it’s so tough being this hot” i love you girl, and she’s over eret and is like “wow he missed out” and talks about snotlout and fishlegs which was :///// but the guys don’t do the whole fighting over her thing so that’s! and she’s like “i guess fishlegs but he’s a nerd” and at the end he cries at the wedding and she’s like “wow i guess the sensitive guy wins” so a lot of her stuff was kinda about men ://// but herself was PERFECT and she boops grimmel’s face with the bobble ends of her hair pretending they’re a zippleback. she makes jokes about why is grimmel’s face so long, and her’s is long but WOW does that take the cake. and she says “astrid round face” it was so !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! she’s so good i love her 

rupple does a good job with tuff. the voice difference was noticeable and i kept thinking about it but i think he did well. tuff gets a bunch of speaking parts and he’s super involved with the whole wedding concept and he’s like “haha wow hiccy, a DOES NOT WANT to get married 2 u LOL. which is #tru cause like. she’s a viking warrior queen and you’re well you. you need to shape up. also. be more like me” which i will TAKE i cannot believe tuffstrid is REAL. also now im about 80% convinced hiccup and astrid took a break to see other ppl and tuffstrid fucked. tuff and astrid don’t really interact except for when they leave ruff behind but they KEEP on doing this whole, vibe thing that makes them seem like they’re good friends. like. tuff thinking he knows what astrids want or admires and he actually goes and all his advice/pep talk is like half leg jokes but it’s all good????? tuff has ear piercings, they’re SO on point they look so good, and he’s got rings all over his fingers i love this kid so much he’s so great. he calls his braid his beard and whenever anyone looks a little sad he like, shoves their face into his braid to comfort them.

also tuff says there’s no edge of the world cause actually it’s round like the sun and the moon and stars, even tho stars are dumb. 

i was right fishlegs’ first sentence is basically them all going “wow a nerd” akdshgfkdjghfg. he doesn’t get as much screen time as the others, and most of it is focused on fishmeat, who is ADORABLE and PERFECT. that big moose dragon meets fishmeat at the start and they become bffs and he defends his lil buddy

snotlout’s also not as much screen time, and most of it is him following valka around and being impressed with her and wanting her to say nice things about him. the rest is him getting caught on his cape. valka says nice stuff about eret cause he’s actually good at this planning stuff (except one bit thats played for jokes where snotlout is like “we should spilt up cause *good reasons*” and then eret is like “we should spilt up cause i feel like it” and valka’s all “i trust your instincts!!!!”. it was weird bc it was the only really good tactical decision snotlout made and it gets ignored) and he keeps getting his ego pumped up when he takes what valka says wrong - like she’s being polite, or there’s double meanings and he takes it like he’s good but all he did was get caught on a cage and hung there until hookfang picked him up - and at the end she says “eret maybe brawn, but you’re the brains” and snotlout feels validated again but he doesn’t really deserve it? like idk i wish she said something meaningful. it’s not kind to make someone feel like they’re good at something they’re not. you should encourage him when he’s doing well. 

eret is just kinda. around. doing things. and being like, snotlout’s “rival” for valka’s attention and eret is like. what are you on about lmao

also. i’ve seen some out of context spoilers and they mentioned something being gay but i don’t know where that’s from? snotlout kinda says some great things about eret but it’s a real squint and gobber says eret has the body of a norse god but then he says he does as well and then puts a crick in back when he’s stretching so it’s very clearly a joke and it’s definitely like ‘he’s fat and old and dirty its funny cause he thinks he’s attractive” rather than anything else

hmmMMmmMMMMM god ive forgotten what i’ve talked about and what i haven’t im sure i have more to say but this is already super long os. you can ask me questions if u like. send me an im or something 

#httyd3 spoilers #httyd 3 spoilers #hidden world spoilers #spoilers #httyd3 #dot post

[mxadrian779]

It really sucks when you find out someone you thought was a friend (or at least a good acquaintance) is actually a pretty trashy person.

Okay, let me build up the backstory. Almost seven years ago, I created a niche political page. I tended it alone for about a year before enlisting the help of a second admin. In comes this guy we'll call Richard. Richard and I got along decently. We shared a lot of thoughts and identities. I thought he helped me with the page considerably. He helped tend the page with me for about two years or so. We chatted a lot, and I really liked him. Then things start getting weird between us. Richard seems to start getting weird. There's stuff going on in his life, divorce and whatnot. I get a notice that the page we had was scheduled to be deleted within seven days. I loved my page; I certainly didn't schedule it for deletion. I ask Richard, who swears he didn't and blames his ex-husband, whom he insists must have hacked his account. I don't know who to believe, although I am certainly more suspicious of Richard than of his ex. I remove the deletion schedule, and bump Richard's page access down—basically, I took away his power and control over my page. Things are okay, kind of. The stuff Richard posts to the page is half decent and half questionable. Then he posts a swastika picture, a meme comparison of some current figure to a past Nazi figure with a swastika flag in the background. I wasn't aware of the post at the time; I was busy with school. I only heard of it when my stalker elsewhere online started circulating news of that post (my stalker watches every one of my online pages and presences) and calling me antisemitic—because of something I didn't post and wasn't even aware was posted! I immediately track down that post and remove it, and talk to Richard about it. He claims innocence and dodges the matter. I don't remember what else went on between us, but I certainly remember him being vague and dodgy about it, even after I told him what a shitty thing that was, and told him to at least consider the image that post projects. He didn't care.

(edit: looking back at my messages to him and finding a host of other problems that happened at once. I wanted to address them but he just ignored me. Transphobia, the swastika post, and he'd made some crude sexual posts, as well.)

 Now, I don't remember the exact timeline of events, but this was coming to a head about two years ago, when I was coming out of my transphobia. Richard had made a few transphobic posts on the page over its lifetime, which I didn't protest then. But then I started to see its shittiness and started deleting it all. I tried to open a discussion about it with him, like, “hey, what's up with this stuff?” kind of thing. Richard ignored me. A little later, I removed him from the page completely, which he didn't protest or maybe even notice. Richard was no longer an admin, but I spent the next few months cleaning up his messes and remaking the tone of the page. I tried to track down his old crappy posts and delete them. I know there must be many more, but they're buried beyond reach. I made it clear on the page that we are no longer to be transphobic, and that we are to be welcoming instead of mocking. I ran solo for a long time, afraid to enlist another admin and another Richard.

 A few years ago, before anything went sour, Richard decided we should have a group counterpart, which he created and added me as an admin. I was hardly active with it, though, more focused on the page part. I was last in the group three years ago—my last post. The group fell inactive and I stopped caring about it, especially when I started seeing what a richard Richard was.

Recently, this group came back to the fore when one of the other people Richard enlisted as an admin came back and started poking around. He took issue with what I had posted three years ago, and flew into all these weird accusations about it. He questioned my integrity and my identity, and said I shouldn't be an admin there. He especially didn't like when I told him I was transgender (he said something derogatory about me being a woman or something, so I countered). I private messaged Richard, and said, “What's going on with the group (i.e., this asshole)?” He replied that he'll handle it. I wish I took record of exactly what was said in the group by the other guy, but that wasn't on my mind. I'll finish this off with the transcript of our messages.

>me

>>him

 >Okay, what's going on with the group?

 >>I have no idea. [he] messaged me about your post im reading it now. But i dont particularly see anything controversial

 >It's so old xD I don't get the sudden action and the “I don't think you should be an admin”

 >>Think he just wants my attention...:P

Ill tend to him

I didnt know your not a woman

 >I'm female, but I don't identify as a woman.

 >>K well.. he says and I agree thats [accusation]

 >No, it isn't.

 >>And I was having such a pleasent day... haha

Drama queening over a dead group

 >Did

Did you just ban me?

 >>No y

 >I think [the other guy] removed me.

I can't access or even FIND the group.

 >>Dont worry about it. Were chatting ill take care of u in a min

And dont talk to him... shes just in a mood. This a mans job

 >? [I have no idea which of those was intended for me]

 >>Sigh... just let the men talk thats all you gotta do. RN

 >Uh, okay then, I'll let the penises talk.

 >>Lol

>> […]

>>Ok weve decided to reinvent the group and its gonna be male exclusive

 >Why??

 >>Because its a dead group anyway and if we reinvent it we can just say its been here for years. Also engage gay men in intellectual discussion and dialouge

Which isnt something woman are not typically interested in anyway

 >Only cismen are interested in intellectual discussion? Wow, seriously dude?

 >>Yeah actually. Its true. But ill let you know if theres something interesting going on in it :)

 >No, it actually isn't, and I didn't have you pegged as a sexist turd. Don't bother. I'm not interested in whatever Grindr knockoff you're going to turn the group into.

I can't believe you're doing this. We used to be a team. You wouldn't even have had the platform without me and the page, and you're just going to turn around and betray me like this?

 >>Its a dead group hun. Buisness comes first... also didnt need page platform for anything. Actually thats what killed it imo

Also no its not grinder. Its for intellectual dialouge and discussion.

We smoke cigars and drink brandy like men. And its a beaitiful thing

 And that's that. Richard is gone. I feel betrayed, but I don't know what I'm entitled to feel when I wasn't that close with him for the last few years anyway. He was married to a man and for all intents and purposes, he bills himself as gay, but he recently had a very strong and public relationship with a woman and got close to her son. Apparently that relationship is no more, and he still calls himself gay. Meanwhile, his page is full of questionable things. I haven't been keeping track of him, but he had recently started cropping up on my feed again. One of his posts said something to the effect of “the country went to crap when we gave women and minorities the vote” and it's just like WOW ARE YOU KIDDING ME. How was I EVER friends with this dude??

#dead friendship #racist #misogynist #sexist #transphobia #transphobe #betrayal #wtf was i thinking #rant #vent

[celebritytgcaptions]

Requests (5/15/17)

I haven’t been answering requests for a while because I’ve been busy with school and other stuff, but things have quieted down so here are the requests I’ve been getting (and they’re A LOT). So if you sent me a request in the past week or two and you haven’t seen me to respond to it odds are it’s listed below. Thanks for being patient! <3

Anonymous said:

Can you do one with Jessica Chastain, where a high school guy gets turned into his biggest enemies mother, and has to be a motherly figure to him or stay her forever? And he also soon figures out he has a new big dicked husband to please too?

Sure thing!

Anonymous said:

Sorry bad English. Can do cap with Michelle Rodriguez?

No need to be sorry. And I can totally do one with Michelle Rodriguez for you. :)

@kittystclare​ said:

I know I still have a request coming, but I'd like to make another request if I can. I quite enjoyed your Miley Cyrus cap the other day and would like to request one with her. Basically, a guy named Britt wants to be a singer, but is made over by his friend Melanie into a female pop star, Kitty St. Clare. She also uses some hypnosis to make sure Kitty is extra provocative both on and off stage using overt sexuality. Thanks!

I’m glad you liked the other Miley one I posted. I can 100% do this for you, Kitty. ;)

Anonymous said:

Hey can you do one where a guy tells his wife that he only got with her so she could be his trophy. So she turns him into Kate Upton, and he becomes the trophy wife of a unattractive man. And he can't do anything about it no matter how much he tries and dislikes it.

You bet!

Anonymous said:

hi could you create caption where guy named adam come to amy adams house and he please her if she transform him into herself and she answer him okay i do it for you

I got you, honey. :)

Anonymous said:

hello can you please create caption where kaya scodelario meet 20 year old Homeless named joe and say him i can change your life and Homeless had a question how you can change my live? said Homeless and Kaya answer him its very simple i transform you into herself what do you say ? and Homeless answer her yes that was my dream to be you the next day he was his dream woman Kaya Scodelario and now his life was more better then before

I’m not really comfortable including an issue like homelessness in one of my captions. I can do one with Kaya Scodelario that’s pretty close to this, but I’m not going to include the homeless aspect. Sorry if that disappoints you. :(

Anonymous said:

Could you do something where a boy gets turned into an obedient clone of Beyonce for disrespecting the Queen B. So he has to join the Bey Hive

Oooo! I like this! You got it, sugar. ;)

Anonymous said:

Can you do a caption where a young stud is robbed of his youth and masculinity through hormones and surgery to be an eccentric older lady using Glenn Close as Cruella De Ville please?

Huh. I’ve never gotten a request like this before but I don’t see why not. I can make this for you. :)

Anonymous said:

Can you make a caption where a huge and buff 7 foot tall wrestler is needed to be taken down a peg, so to try to teach him a lesson, he is turned into Alexa Bliss? She's an adorable wrestler who's just over 5 feet tall.

Sure thing! :)

Anonymous said:

Can you do one where a guy is always calling his little sister a slut, so his sisters best friend curses him into her body... And she tells him if he acts like her, pretends to enjoy it, and has sex as her, he'll turn back... And after he does all this, she tells him that all that actually makes it permanent, and he freaks out

Hey I just requested the trapped in sisters body one... And forgot to ask if you could use Chloe Grace Moretz. You don't have to reply to this, that's my bad

No bad at all. I can totally make this for you! I kinda luv this idea. :D

Anonymous said:

Can you do a story on a guy named Elias who is confronted by Drag Queens and becomes Queen Latifah?

I think I can do this? I usually try to avoid actual drag queens and transwomen in my caps because I don’t want to be disrespectful, but I think I can write this in a way where it will be respectful. So I can type this up for you, sure. :)

Anonymous said:

Wouldnt mind something with Rebecca Black. Possibly someone's still teasing her about her Friday video after all these years, and she decides to make him the star of a new video that will make hers seem amazing

I had to google Rebecca Black to make sure she was 18+ and she is so yes I can make this for you! :)

Anonymous said:

Have u ever thought about doing a caption where a guy attempts to confront some dude who slept with his fiance but it ends up with the man slept with the fiance turning the first guy into his ideal busty mistress that decides to keep as his sex slave?

I have't thought of it but this sounds amazing so I’ll totally write this for you! :D

Anonymous said:

Could you do a caption where a boy is turned into a selena gomez doll (Use the pic of her in the doll dress please from WoWP) by a neighbor girl. He gets punished and needs to work on his sissy lisp

YES! OMG! I have had a GIF of this forEVA and I never came up with a story for it. So yes! Yes! Yes! I will like TOTALLY do this for you! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

Anonymous said:

I love your Caps. Could you do a cap with Miranda Cosgrove and Jenette McCurdy

Totally! :)

Anonymous said:

Could you do a Rachel Keller Cap

Anonymous said:

Can you do a Mary Elizabeth Winstead

Anonymous said:

Plz do a Felicia Day caption xx

Yes to Rachel Keller, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, AND Felicia Day!

Anonymous said:

Can I request a caption where a boy wanted so badly to be Demi Lovato's replica sissy, and she agreed. Though now he's living it he wants to be free, but Demi just finds her pouting sissy to be that much more adorable?

Ooo, fun! Totally I can make this for you. :)

Anonymous said:

can you do a story about a brilliant prof who cruelly fails a student and gets turned into a super slow witted fat titted thirty year old with a ton of learning disabilities whose blowing her GED tutor

I don’t think I’ll include the learning disabilities (because that’s like a real thing people struggle with, you know?) but the rest of it sounds amazing so I’ll totes do it for ya! :D

There are two messages I got that I’m going to answer separately so if you sent those keep an eye out for them within the hour. Thanks for being patient everyone! I love you all! <3 <3 <3

#Request #Not a Caption #Jessica Chastain #Michelle Rodriguez #Kate Upton #Miley Cyrus #Amy Adams #Kaya Scodelario #Beyonce #Glenn Close #Alexa Bliss #Chloe Grace Moretz #Queen Latifah #Rebecca Black #Selena Gomez #Rachel Keller #Mary Elizabeth Winstead #Felicia Day #Miranda Cosgrove #Jennette McCurdy #Demi Lovato

[adriennescomingbacktolife]

(IV)

“So why me?” Adrienne paused, introductions over, now it was time for business. She put the TracFone on speaker and set it down on the coffee table, next to a red RC car. The toy and slightly cracked iPad had been returned to her by some sly fox. Reclining back on the couch, she considered her words carefully as she fiddled with the wrapper of a watermelon Jolly Rancher. As promised, the tarot card reader delivered. Those two small moments that night, removed from cameras, helped her not to think about what eventually did happen. But honestly, she didn’t get the same personable feelings from Matt Knox. He seemed ornery and sometimes rude. It perplexed her that he spoke out like he did. “You could have had your pick of anyone. Silvio. Willis. Anyone else.” “I need a reason now? Because you’ll hurt them as bad as I will, kid. Sure he probably annoyed those two, but he flat out insulted you.” “I’m used to it.” She appreciated his vote of confidence but her anger towards Lab Rat King amounted to little. She had ran at him with all of these thoughts of taking him down a peg or two and well, the boot shaped bruise on her neck told a different story. So here’s this Alex Winter being as deplorable as possible and she’s going to hurt him? Like injure his pride even? What a pipe dream. “It’s a nice thought. I’ll do my best, Matt. But you were right, it’s like he knew. Like he knew what buttons to press...” Trailing off, she changed the subject quickly. “In a general sense, you know.” “Yeah. General.” A pause, Knox exhaled on his end. “Fuck him in the neck. He shot off at the mouth, and kept shooting off. His own partner is irritated with him. We play this right, this is fish in a barrel. And we both get what we want." This man’s swagger was something Adrienne could definitely use more of. She could do without the swearing but that was just her. But yeah, the attitude, there was a difference. Like watching him get back into the ring, it seemed like he never left. Admitted ring rust or not, he was quite formidable. He hit hard and he spoke bluntly. Despite the glum start to her career, it seemed like people were taking notice. She had made some assumptions about that attention. Including Matt Knox. Something prodded her to stop internalizing this. Take a risk. Take a leap, so to speak. “So this is my first tag match. I know the rules well enough. And right now, I think we have an advantage. I don’t see Alex and Steve remaining cohesive as a unit. However, I’d be remiss if I didn’t just say this.” Take a big leap, Adrienne. “So I know you’ve got daughters in the sport. I’m not one of them. And I’m not a kid. Technically, I am a rookie. And maybe this sounds like a broken record but I’ve been in the business since I was nineteen years old. So I’m your peer. Your tag partner, Matt.” ”Of course you are, Mrs. Levi. But you also have only gotten active in the ring… what, a week before I returned? The week of? There is a chasm between us as far as experience. Far greater than the chasm of talent, and the one of grit. I wouldn’t have asked for this match if I thought I’d need to carry you through it.” And well, there it was. Matt had a point. She’d been pretty relieved. Years of offering her opinion and rarely receiving a sensible reply had left her gunshy. “Alright. Cool.” So then there’s the matter of capitalism being rather cruel sometimes. New month and her wallet was already coughing mothballs. “I’ll be honest. I don’t have the resources some of you have. I’ve seen personal rings set up. I’ve seen where some of you have the means to just up and move-” She stopped, sensing an interruption. “Listen, if you can get back to Baltimore, go to the Marriott by the Harbor. Rooms 201 and 204, check both, ask for Bert. Tell him I said rent you a room through the next Chaos. It isn’t charity, but we can NOT go into this without at least kind of training as a unit.” Adrienne didn’t expect anything to be handed her but her brain swarmed with what was to her an astronomical cost. “Now, I gotta go break up a child fighting ring in the desert at a wrestling festival. I’ll see you soon.” “What?” He had already hung up. If you can get back to Baltimore. He made that sound easy. Done fiddling with the wrapper, Adrienne popped the Jolly Rancher into her mouth. Her mother was out of the question. She had left nearly a dozen text messages. Despite not being a fan, Angie had watched. And she was beyond angry about what transpired. Her texts were delivered in all caps. All of them accusational in nature. Or absolute frightened concern. But the last one was curiously subdued. Time stamped moments after Adrienne set down the microphone and limped away. wow love u, ade Love you too mom Convincing her mother to lend a few hundred bucks to get to Baltimore to meet a man-- well, Adrienne would never finish the request. In the small hallway before the front door, her white Fuji Absolute leaned against the wall. Her only mode of transportation. In something that only evoked embarrassment, she had never learned how to drive. Danny was cool with that, of course. Katy from work, former work, had always offered to buy it. After the miscarriage, Adrienne didn’t feel like correcting her Mother at that time, Katy got real interested in fitness. She always said the bike was being wasted in A to B use. Probably. It was another present from Danny. “Time to walk more, I guess.” She retrieved her personal phone. U still want the bike? Just moments passed. Yeah. 250 200. Meet in middle? 225 Sure. Drop it by Kaplan? Meet u in lot Just days after returning, she swung back around to Baltimore. As promised, there was a room in her name at the Marriott at Camden Yards. A note from Bert told her to take an Uber to a warehouse nearby. She entered from one of the side doors. The shelves were stacked high with canned goods but there was also a huge clearing as she stepped forward. Smack dab in the middle, there was a full blown wrestling ring set up. Some guy in a light jacket and a beanie was tightening the turnbuckles with a wrench. He looked up as Levi’s sneakers squeaked on the concrete. He had light blue eyes, kind looking despite a gruff exterior. “Bert?” With an exerted effort, he gave the wrench one more twist. Shaking the top rope, he was satisfied. Adrienne kept her distance as he finally acknowledged her presence. “Yeah, you Mrs. L?” “Adrienne.” Bert rolled out of the ring. “Come closer, echo’s a bitch in here.” Stepping just a few feet closer, she clutched the strap of her gym bag. “Knox’ll join us later.” “You’re his trainer?” “No, I mean, yeah. Long story. So where you learn at?” He seemed to start denying that but he got this smile on his face, like he was saying something facetious in nature. Adrienne hadn’t heard of a trainer who was possibly younger than the trainee but maybe Bert was a prodigy. “Down where I live. Redd Thunder.” She shook her head, that was his ring name. He’d been a decade removed from active competition. That friend of Danny’s who she drained her savings for. “Greg Berkowitz.” “Who?” Bert chuckled, “Sorry, so you want the truth, Adrienne?” Adrienne nodded slowly, she knew what was coming. “Imagine you paid a pretty penny and it's sad ‘cause you can’t even run the ropes right. Knox saw it right as rain when he watched your tapes. That’s all taught though. Everything else you’re doing? It’s like some raw instinct shit. That big ass jump to the outside? Took some huge balls.” “Thanks, I guess.” “Don’t thank me yet. Matt and uh, I have less than two weeks to retrain you on the basics. Otherwise, the two dipshits are going to eat you alive. That means less money. For all of us. That love of the sport gibberish doesn’t mean anything if you can’t eat.” That resonated with her. A month more of this and she’d have no choice but to crawl back to Kaplan. If they would even have her. “So what do I do?” “Bathroom’s in the back. Go get changed.” Bert gestured wildly behind him to a singular restroom at then end of a short hallway. “We’re going to start over. Later we’ll get you in front of a real rig. Have you give them a piece of your mind.” This was a stark contrast. The last three times viewers had seen Adrienne Levi, it’d been her filming herself. That term was to be used loosely. First, audiences were treated to the grainy camera of the iPhone 5 - or was it 6? She couldn’t remember. It had been another one of his gifts. Second, the videos were vertically shot. Third, if one liked the shaky camera movement of the Blair Witch Project, Adrienne was their girl. Instead, here she was, in full view. Dressed in a sleeveless black shirt that in bold red font proclaimed her the Queen of the Simps, black nondescript tights, and her beat up used pair of black wrestling boots. Adrienne was in front of a black backdrop splashed with the logo of her employer. “This one?” She pointed, just to the side of her. Someone off camera directed her attention to the camera that was actually on. “Oh, you. Sorry, I’ve never seen so much equipment set up before. Just for me to chat with you all.” Adrienne smiled quaintly. For the moment, she just stood there, shuffling her feet. She eyed something to her right. “May I? Been on my feet this whole day. I mean, this isn’t formal, right?” Walking off screen, she returned with a steel folding chair. Snapping it open, she placed it backwards and sat. Straddling the frame, she rested her elbows on the back of the chair. Mat burn was prevalent. “That’s better.” Now what was she going to say? Her mind has been swarming with all of the events of the last week. The obvious was her encounter with the Lab Rat King. His vicious ways had filled her nightmares that last few nights but truthfully, she preferred that monster over others that would traipse about in her subconscious. This sudden partnership with Matt Knox perhaps.Things had been more clear after their first real conversation. And finally, there was Steve Matthews and Alex Winter - two diametrically opposed newcomers who would serve as her opposition. “So forgive me, I got a little emotional on Monday night.” The boot shaped bruise on her neck was a startling reminder of why she may have been. “There are a lot of adages I’ve heard lately about my less than stellar start here at Carnage Wrestling. Not going to bother with them. You get the gist. I’ve just gotta keep trying, right?” She tapped fingers on the chair, pausing to allow that question to be affirmed. “I’ll say this, I was really wrong about some folks here. You’ve gotta understand something. Any competitor worth their salt doesn’t want to hear that their failure was like … a good try. That’s where I decided to put this into perspective. Other than losing to someone in my debut that lacked any conviction to back up her powerful proclamations, I’ve squared off with world class athletes…” She frowned. “... and a seemingly invincible foe. But here I am. Ready for more.” And then returned to a more neutral calculating expression. “I appreciate the compliments. I want to pay it forward.” Adrienne held one finger up. “Matt Knox. I think I would have like a little notice before you issued this challenge. But I get it. You and I have something in common and it’s not a good thing. Zero wins between us. Here’s the thing. You’re smart. You know what it takes to win. And having lost it all, you know how just bad it can get. Fighting with you prior, I trust you as my partner.” A second finger. “Steve Matthews. You’re Carnage’s Ace, despite never appearing prior. And you’re The Technical Master. A cursory look tells me you’ve accomplished a whole lot in your storied career. You’re as advertised in the ring. But with accolades like yours, it makes me wonder why you’re not just facing Amber Ryan in your debut, championship on the line and everything. Instead, you desperately accept an open challenge to cozy up with an individual who you can’t even stand.” She smiled, maybe relaying just a spark of sarcasm. “You’re pretty confident in your abilities but one thing I know about the art of tag team wrestling is that you’re only as good as your partner. Judging by your interactions with Alex, you think this is all about you. And I’m not reaching when I say that Alex Winter doesn’t believe much in this fragile alliance.” Adrienne held those two fingers there in an inadvertent peace sign. She shook her head, looking maybe a little disappointed. “Gosh, I apologize, Steve. I’m supposed to be complimentary towards you and well, I guess I’m not. You speak emphatically about how serious you take this business and that’s kind of cool. But other than that?” She shrugged her shoulders, then resting her chin on her forearms. “I don’t know. For all of that blustering about how you don’t advocate for your partner’s actions, you sure are complicit. It speaks negatively to your character. Like you’re unable to decide if being a good human is okay. Your companion doesn’t believe that so while you’re threatening to betray him, you’re still not explicitly condemning him. It makes you kind of … and I’m sorry, weak.” Sitting up, Adrienne raised a third finger. “Alex Winter. You paid me a compliment.” She’d been thinking about Alex Winter a lot lately. Through mere Twitter exchanges and one brief video, he had sure made an impact. Adrienne was sure he would consider that he was living rent free in her mind. That wasn’t the case. Rent was due and the price was something this party animal could never comprehend. “And so maybe I should have just smiled and batted my eyes.” And she did, displaying a strange flash of attitude as her expression then steeled. “I promised this to even you. Like your partner, you’re pretty impressive in the ring. And so perhaps when you throw out cliches that you can walk the walk - maybe you can.” Alex Winter had spent a lot of his career overseas in Japan. And now he was here to test his mettle in the states with over a decade of experience. Maybe Danny and him partied together. Probably not. Danny Levi was …. was not like Alex Winter. “But back to your compliment. I didn’t take it as one based on your reputation, more on that in a moment. Your response was to get pretty defensive. And so it makes a girl like me wonder, did you really mean to make me feel good? Because instead you just made some assessment of my attractiveness. Instead of seeing Adrienne Levi the person, you just saw my face, my body, my whatever. Imagine if you had said: Hey, you had a great match! After all, we share the same profession.” Awkwardly, she stood up. In fact, she nearly fell backwards in the chair. Would have made for a good visual as she is trying to address someone looking for any weakness in her. “You got real defensive because this sort of thing affects your reputation. You ever wonder why I chose to not view what you said favorably? You registered on Twitter very late into June. It took you just one day to solicit a woman to show you her … can I curse on here?” She looked around. “I’d rather not but look, in relation to a woman asking people to wear masks for what is obviously going on in the world, you turned the subject sexual in nature. On the same day, you responded to another woman’s picture.” Adrienne considered the content, tapping her chin. “Now when you made your advance, she said no, you persisted with some video of you pantomiming a sexual act. I don’t know how to tell you this, Alex, but if that is your technique - there is no wonder why you’ve been rebuked so many times lately.” She twisted the chair around, now sitting it in as nature intended. “And then it all kind of devolved. Slander, you claim. The problem is that it isn’t really that far-fetched to believe these sorts of things about you. It’s an easy correlation to assume that when someone says effectively they don’t respect women, that they’re a misogynist? It’s totally feasible that a misogynist also thinks less about minority populations because sometimes their struggles intersect. Now, you’re right. Just because you’re a misogynist who sexually harrasses women on the internet doesn’t mean you’re guilty of being a rapist. It does however make you very guilty of contributing to rape culture.” Pausing for effect, she crossed one leg over the other. “I don’t know a lot but Alex, it’s been an eye opening year for me and I’ve learned alot about myself as a person and that I could have fought instead of hiding ...but I’m not ...I’m not going to hide from people like you anymore.” Sighing, Adrienne looked upwards before returning her gaze towards the camera. “This is more than I wanted to talk and you know what stinks? This match could have had a different narrative. Matt Knox, my partner, he’s a former world champion but do you know what’s cooler than that? He’s overcoming some very public issues to return to the sport he loves. And you two? You guys are excellent professional wrestlers. Instead it’s about Alex Winter backpedaling after his atrocious suggestion that I should be leashed, muzzled, and doped up because I dared to call him out for his unwanted compliment. It’s about Steve Matthews being spineless. It’s about whether those two can even get along. Well, you know, I’d like to think there will be a better ending to a story that is told all too often.” Standing up, she felt something unfamiliar. Danny called it his machismo. But it felt like swelling in her heart. Her voice raised above the little chirp she was known for. “What is it about you two? Steve, those that standby and watch the injustices get no reprieve. And Alex, you’re a relic of the bygone past. And you don’t seem to be paying attention to what’s happening around here. Just last month, I watched Kyra Johnson prove she is Ultraviolence. And Amber Ryan is the Ironwoman. Then there’s Catalina Cortes, she’s a champion too. And Poppy. And Jenova! I’m sure I’m missing a few and I’m super sorry about that because you’re all amazing. They’re also all counterpoints to your ignorance. And then there’s me. I’m nobody special. But with Matt Knox, we’re going to end you before you even begin.” The camera lingered even though she had finished her piece. “That’s all. Nothing much else to say. You can turn--” The feed cut.

#roleplay