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thesherrinfordfacility · 9 months

Text

✨ episode 1/2 - running commentary✨

- ok so im slightly disappointed that it's the eps i watched in the screening BUT IM DETERMINED TO LOVE IT ANYWAY SO WE REMAIN OPTIMISTIC AND WE MOVE~~

- angel crowley is so young and innocent my poor boy he's been through so much

- like now im watching it, it feels like putting it in a cinema was a Bad Choice and maybe that's why I didn't like it??? it feels way more authentic and cosy on tv

- im sorry but crowley sounds like such an old man in the park scene, "frozen peas... it's good for them too🙂"

- seriously this is so much more palatable on tv format i can't get over it

- OH MAGGIE I LOVE YOU

- aziraphale god bless ur little cotton socks

- god crowley's legs got me SWEATIN

- ugh crowleys hand in the cafe is so FRUITY

- lmao "purely selfish action" aziraphale is so self aware and I love it

- no im sorry but goob is the fucking star of the show you cannot change my mind but dialogue and delivery wise he is currently CARRYING

- Dartmoor mention had me creasing, that's literally on my doorstep

- aziraphale's bitchy ass face then he sits down in the backroom honestly watered my crops and healed nature

- okay im sorry but the dialogue is still a little off for me I won't lie💀

- beelzebub's accent is just 😘👌 perfect, but equally feel like they'd be perfect in a production of oliver

- god believe me i feel for nina but... I... do not like her, and they are NOT suited for each other at all

- I LEARNT MY PASSION IN THE GOOD OLD FASHIONED SCHOOL OF LOVER BOYS

- that dance is so low effort I'm sorry it should have been the macarena or cha cha slide

- crowley's bow tho is so hot he's so graceful he looks like a swan

- and yeah the refs to the other years that aziraphale did the dance is GIVING ME HEART PALPITATIONS ugh

- he and goob are like cats on a hot tin roof like IMMEDIATE hissing vibes

- lmao ok so that episode does end there then... such a weird ending im sorry but yeah let's fully retract the alternate episode theory (but @prime you need to hire me for s3 just a thought bc 👀)

- anyway ep2 I'm sorry but the angelic herald speech thing is cute and funny but also so cringe hmmm

- gabriel is lord farquaad ugh

- I HAVE TO REMEMBER THIS IS A COMEDY UGH but i miss the slightly serious undertones in s1 sob god I hope they come back later on

- UGH THE TURTLENECK🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵

- shax is mommy I don't make the rules

- I noted it in the screening but angel wings for earrings, Maggie????

- nice job on the lie aziraphale well done once again making excellent choices you're so smart and valid (utter moron)

- "SOUNDS A BIT UNLIKELY" LMAO GET FUCKED CROWLEY

- oh goob you really are going through it my bby I love u

- crowley's face after may god forgive you KILLS ME this scene is honestly the stand out one in both ep1 and ep2 if you ask me

- TY TY TY god bless u but you also make me so uncomfortable

- jobs youngest kid truly gives me life

- lmao the fact that aziraphale does actually recognise when crowley tempts him is hilarious tho bc he just conveniently disregards it by the bench scene in s1 hmmm character development or character regression WHO KNOWS

- ok no I'm sorry but the mukbang scene is so unnecessary and uncomfortable

- "whack the kids" honestly the best line of this scene imo, but upon reflection and rewatching it, crowley's demeanour is rather heartbreaking whilst he's reclined getting ratted

- FRANCES FRANCES FRANCES ✨💓

- 'but just to be able to ask the question' UGH CROWLEY STOP

- lmao shoemaking and obstetrics what a combo god bless

- THEY CAN ARRIVE AT ANY SIZE lmao and Michael is too sharp for their own good... but I do hate that gabriel is utterly inept, he came across as cruel and calculating if a little ignorant in s1 but not this comedically stupid

- "yes I bloody am" TY MY LOVE

- Michael sheen and David Tennant deserve nominations for the children swap scene alone, imo the strongest bit of acting in the ep im sorry 'you have my word as an angel' KILL ME

- why is nina obsessed with crowley, like I get it babes but also why

- THEY ARE SO MARRIED MT PARTNER AND I ARGUE OVER THE CAR ALWAYS "our car" LMAO 💀💀💀

- ✨✨✨IT WAS A NICE DAY, ALL THE DAYS HAD BEEN NICE✨✨✨

- ok the rock scene is so much more emotional on tv, so much better

OKAY RIGHT EP3 LETS HAVE ITTTTT

#good omens #good omens season 2 #go2 commentary #good omens spoilers #good omens 2 spoilers #not a shitpost but its good omens babyyyy #edit: it unnerves me that neil liked this cesspit of inner monologue but similarly the man's a madlad and cannot be contained #go off i guess

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hetaari · 5 months

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one of my favorite hetalia writers (you lol) is into vocaloid too?????? Bruh???? Do you have any bedroom or fashion headcanons for the cryptons???

ough this is long overdue I'm so sorry,,,,, I don't want this to get too long so I'll post fashion headcanons here and make bedroom headcanons a separate poast

Miku

huge fan of floral print

she has lots of those cute brightly colored sundresses

so obviously spring/summer is where she peaks clothing wise

she wears skirts and tights even when it’s cold out but she does have her limits. If it’s seriously painfully cold and she has no choice but to be outside she will absolutely abandon being fashionable for the sake of not freezing to death

that being said. she does frequently make the mistake of underestimating how cold it gets. "it cant be that cold," she says, clueless. and every time, she suffers the consequences

Occasionally borrows stuff from Luka

Rin

like Miku, she also peaks during spring/summer fashion wise

shes more of a shorts person, though. shorts and graphic tees

her skirts generally tend to be on the shorter side

lots of tank tops and camisoles

Also she’s got quite a bit of pastel colors in her wardrobe

but tbh she 'borrows' (50/50 chance of her having asked) stuff from Miku

she doesn't suffer as much in the cold as Miku does, even though she wears short skirts and tights in cold weather as well (better tolerance for the cold, really)

Len

slightly better at dressing for cold/mild weather tbh

thats not to say that his warm weather wardrobe is bad or anything, its just a bit plain bc he doesn’t care that much, specifically in summer when he’s focused more on not boiling to death

He’s pretty much at his best in fall and mid-late spring

He does more light colors when it’s warm and more dark colors when it’s cold

He has a lot of hoodies, jackets, and cardigans

he unironically wears cargo shorts/pants; a tactical advantage over bags, he says

once late fall/winter hits. ooh boy you best believe he's gonna be 'stealing' Kaito's sweaters constantly (bigger = more warmth is the logic he’s going by)

Luka

Her sense of style is a bit more on the modest side tbh

She doesn’t go for anything overly flashy

Her wardrobe's got a lot of muted colors in general, though she does also have brightly colored things like sundresses and stuff

yes she wears skirts when its cold but she generally wears long skirts anyway so it's not too weird

she generally avoids things with hoods unless she's desperate

she has a lot of. long flowy clothing. skirts, dresses, cardigans, you name it

also a lot of linen stuff and sunhats

and she only wears trench coats or peacoats, she doesn't like zippers very much

Meiko

World's biggest crop top stan

Also a fan of denim (but like, nothing outrageous)

plenty of tube tops

i think she'd have a collection of sunglasses

she doesn't tolerate cold too well, so when its winter, she'd be wearing one of them big ass coats with the fur on the hood

and maybe some timbs or something. she's a real boots gal

a lot of reds, oranges, yellows, and browns

like len, she also steals kaito's sweaters

unlike len, though, she usually asks for them and returns them without a fuss

Kaito

Ngl he kinda dresses like someone's father when the weather is warm

button ups, khakis, polo shirts, the works

hell, he's even worn cargo shorts. and hes got watches. that's just how Dad he gets

he doesn't do socks and sandals, at least

once it gets cold, that's when he really starts dressing

lots of blues, black, white and gray

Constant victim of his sweaters getting stolen, namely by Len and occasionally Meiko (at least Meiko just gives them back, Len pesters him to say 'fuck' before returning them)

also once warmer weather hits he takes a bit of time to get used to having his neck exposed; he just feels really weird without his scarf or something at least partially obscuring his neck, especially when he's in public

#hetaari speaks #ask #vocaloid #hatsune miku #kagamine rin #kagamine len #megurine luka #meiko vocaloid #kaito vocaloid

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letstalkaboutfandomsbaby · 2 years

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Ok but ur post about chubby chaser!Ukai Keishin is so valid bestie

Like he's a creep with it too. Always wanting to hold the chub and trying to climb into your skin (like yo chill). He pulls all the stops to just get a taste. And you know he eats it like heon have no home trainin

BABY I'M SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG FOR ME TO GET TO!! My brain has been all over the place ever since my coworker quit and I've been taking on more hours ✌😔 I got way too carried away with this, forgive me sksksk

CW: chubby fem reader, smut, not beta read bc i'm a monster sksksk

Keishin is a goddamn menace when it comes to chubby gals

And it's like?? A shock? Like nobody expects this former athlete star to turn into a fucking dog whenever a curvy girl shows up

Lemme back up a bit and explain sksksk

Keishin was fairly popular in high school and college, especially after the dyed hair and piercings

He was always seen as a cool, chill dude, and he ended up being confessed to a fair amount of times

He was able to date everyone he was interested in, and he was pretty content for a while

Until he saw a curvy girl for the first time

So Japan isn't really known for it's chubby population

It's just not as common, yk?

Bc of this, Keishin didn't really interact with chubby women his age

Most overweight ppl were older and reminded him of his parents, so he was never attracted to them

I imagine the first time he sees a chubby woman is when he's on a date with a random girl

They went to an arcade and the two of them were having a good time

Keishin went off to get some more coins and stopped dead in his tracks when he saw a gorgeous curvy woman leaning over a pinball machine, wearing tight jeans and a crop top

He could see everything, every curve, every roll, every bit of pudge squishing against her clothes, threatening to burst

She wasn't alone; she was with some other girls who were cheering her on, so he didn't really have a chance to approach her, but the image of her body was ingrained in his brain

He didn't realize he was staring until he felt drool run down his chin jesus fucking christ dude get a napkin good lord

He didn't go on a second date with the girl he was with; he knew he would never be able to go back to the average skinny girls he had dated in the past

OK BUT LISTEN, HE WENT HOME RIGHT AFTER THE DATE AND LOOKED UP PORN WITH CHUBBY BEAUTIES AND JERKED OFF LIKE 3 TIMES

He is straight up obsessed from that day forward

And the chubby chaser is born sksksksk

Problem now is that he's attracted to a body type that not many ppl have

So he suffers for a while

He meets chubby reader later on and is whipped from the moment he sees them

He's willing to do anything, i mean anything, to get with you

You're an absolute goddess in his eyes and he's ready to worship at your temple aodjkajdls

ANYWAYS

Yk how Keishin seems cool and ppl headcanon him as being "daddy" material and being super smooth and sexy and blah blah blah

Ok well they're wrong sksksk

Keishin is a dweeb and cant flirt even if his life depended on it

He's a big nerd deep down and is not smooth in any way when he's around his crush

So get ready to watch him blush and stutter and stumble and fuck up bc he's so focused on you that he can't do anything right while you're around

He'll drop boxes, fall out of his chair when he tries to lean back, his hand will slip off the counter and he'll fall

He's just so down bad that he's a mess

You've only seen him like this so u assume that's how he always is and don't notice the weird behavior

But his friends do 👀

Enter wingmen Takinoue and Shimida

They have a much easier time talking to you while Ukai's over here about to throw up bc you're wearing a goddamn sundress and he can't take it

They get to know you and the three of you become good acquaintances Keishin feels so left out and he's so distraught yall skskks

The two of them think you and Keishin would make a great couple, so they essentially set yall up sksksk

They ask a bunch of questions beforehand (what kind of guy are you into, what are your fav hobbies, are you interested in dating someone, etc)

Tbh you're wondering if they're trying to have some kind of poly relationship with you bc they just won't leave the topic of dating alone

But then one day you walk into Ukai's store and the two of them are there, basically arguing with Keishin

Takinoue: "Y/N! See, she's here, so let's ask her—"

Keishin: "Wait, don't—"

Shimida: "Hey, Y/N, what do you think of Kei? Be honest: would you go out with him?"

K: "Stop—"

T: "We know he's a total dweeb, but he's pretty cool, right?"

K: "Please—"

S: "He's got a stable job, he takes care of his parents, he's great with kids."

K: "Don't—"

T: "Plus he's been crushing on—"

Ukai hits Takinoue in the back of the head before he can finish, making the second man yell

T: "Dude, what the hell?!"

K: "Just shut up already!"

Poor dumb Kei is as red as a tomato 🥺💕

He's such a cutie pie when he acts like this and you just can't help yourself

"Yes... i would go out with him 👉👈"

T: 😯

S: 😯

K: 😳 "...Really? 🥺"

Omg he's so cute jesus christ

Timeskip: yall go on a date (it's literally so cute, yall went to a movie and ate dinner at a little foodstand and walked around and talked after and you gave him a lil kiss on the cheek and he got this big goofy dumbass grin and he was all blushy and AAAAAAAAAA JUST WANNA MARRY HIM) and soon enough you make it official and start dating 😊💕

Honestly such a sweet boyfriend 🥺💕

He works a lot, but he does his best to spend weekend evenings with you, just hanging out and watching movies and cuddling up on the couch

He'll always bring you your favorite snacks from his shop

You always tell him that he doesn't have to, but he insists

I mean, you're his girlfriend! He's gonna take care of you 🙄

He's such a simp tbh

You could be slouched on the couch in sweatpants and a t-shirt eating chips and he's all "💕💕💕 my queen 💕💕💕"

You're literally the prettiest woman he's ever seen and that's never gonna change

He's alsooooo super obsessed with your curvy body 🥴

Better clear your schedule bc he's gonna spend as much of his possible freetime manhandling your chubbiness

He was very respectful of your boundaries in the beginning, and once he got consent he was ALL OVER YOU

And he still is skskks

He is so obsessed with your ass good lord

Rubbing it, squeezing it, smacking it, biting it

Hell, he'll use it as a pillow if he's in the mood

It doesn't matter how big it is: he wants it in his hands asap

Next favorite place is your tits

They are just so soft and squishy and just looking at them gets him hard

He likes all the stretch marks on them 💕

Traces over them before he takes your nipple in his mouth, moaning while he sucks it

Begged you to let him titty-fuck and he was overjoyed when you allowed it

Thrusting between those pretty titties before cumming all over your cute round face?

There's nothin better

Well... maybe one thing

The part of your body he loves the most is definitely your pussy (obviously)

He will BEG you to sit on his face, like he NEEDS it!!

"he eats it like heon have no home trainin" SHUT UP ALSGAKSFJKSDFJ ISTFG I'M SCREAMINGGGGGG, THAT'S LITERALLY THE FUNNIEST THING I'VE EVER READ, NOTHING WILL TOP IT

No no no, but you said it perfectly

*insert "do you eat pussy like that" meme here*

Im talkin slobberin, slurpin, suckin, moanin like a goddamn WHORE while he eats the kitty

He's always loved eating ppl out, but everyone else's is like chopped liver compared to the beef wellington that is your chubby pussy aldhaldjls

He legit DEVOURS you any chance he gets, like he practically unhinges his jaw and engulfs your pussy

He'll hold you down for an hour, getting drunk off of the taste of you, turning to putty in between your legs

LORD AND DONT GET ME STARTED ON WHEN HE FUCKS YOU—

Mans can never hold back his moans when he slips into you, like he gets so loud to the point where the neighbors hafta hit your wall to warn ya to quiet down

Keishin cant help it tho!! Your pussy is so plump and soft and his dick throbs every time he catches a glimpse of your pussy lips dragging against his cock

You make him so hot and he can't help but thrust into you like a fucking virgin during his first time

Keishin literally worships his chubby girlfriend, treating them like the queen they are and doing everything they ask

You want him to be rough? He'll do it without question. You want him to beg?? He's already on his knees. Want him tied up in the corner while you fuck his friends? I mean, he'll be dying on the inside the whole time but if that's what you really want—

I think you get the point sksksk

Keishin is so over the moon in love with you that he's willing to work three jobs the rest of his life to support you

He'll work 4am to 11pm every single day if it means you're happy

Tbh he's such a simp sksksk like he acts like he doesn't care but the minute you call he's like "what's up babe? How way your day? Need anything? Want me to pick up dinner?" LIKE SKDHLAJDKS JUST SHAMELESS

Idk yall, i just think Keishin loves chubby girls and would treat them the way they deserve to be treated 🤷‍♀️

#ask #keishin ukai #smut #chubby reader #fem reader #i am so sorry this took so long #put it in my drafts and forgot about it akskskks #☀️ asks

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dallonm-archive · 3 years

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[image description: a cropped image of a pink sky. on the right hand side is a bunch of darker pink clouds. Just left of the centre is a full moon. In the centre, in a white serif font reads "writing update" /end id]

july writing update

Hi friends! This writing update is me pretending I did Camp Nano and didn't kinda give up a week in! I had a proper goal and everything, but a lot of things got in the way that I'm not gonna talk about here because I already ranted about it in another update I'm drafting rn. Lets just say it's Disability Pride Month and being not neurotypical or able bodied in writing communities and their inherent focus on productivity is Hard.

But I did get some writing done and wanted to do a little Camp wrap up post regardless. And I'm doing it now because I'm cancelling the last week of July for some rest/self care and I do not want to think about writing for that time and if I write a tumblr post about July Nano being over my brain will think it's actually over <3 I will probably do updates like these for most months tho! Depends on how much I write lol! This one is not too long (by my standards) and has some Revelations, Revelations, Life Cycle of Massive Stars, Nocturne for the Holy and a new wip idea 👁️

excerpts under the cut!

general taglist ; ask to be + or - ; i only have one! ; @childhoodlovers @svpphicwrites @abiandwriting @kowlazovdi @avi-why @ryns-ramblings @kitblogsthings @bijouxs @bookphobe @moonhungers @alicewestwater @bookpacking @shaelinwrites @onlyganymede @theelectricfactory @write-like-babs @oceancold @sidhewrites @wolf-oak @oasis-of-you @coffeeandcalligraphy @cecilsstorycorner @howdywrites @keira-is-writing @flip-phones @piyawrites @avakrahn @goose-books @finch-goes-write @ziyin @aphaimaniis @isherwoodj @laughtracksonata

I'm also editing this in to say I only just realised that July is my writeblr birthday month and that is very weird to me! A year and a couple days ago I impulsively turned an old blog into a place to document writing for me and ended up meeting people who now mean the world to me and my writing blossoming in a way I never thought it would. And the funny part is it doesn't feel like it's been a year, ever since I joined it's just felt like life has Always been this way and I cannot fathom that it hasn't. I'm sappy bc it's 4am lol but ultimately the friends I made (you know who you are) and the community I found is what retaught me the value of writing and helped me unlearn toxic ideas and whilst the last year was tough I wish I could tell July 2020 Dallon (who did not realise he was Dallon yet </3) what July 2021 would look like.

revelations, revelations ;

Oh the absolute state of affairs with this book rn. Nothing bad but I don't know when I'm gonna update y'all because sometimes I do not know where to start when talking about this wip lol! Currently on a break with it (but also my thesis work is on late 20th century queer lit/history rn so am ever really free of RR? <3) but had a lot of fun with it at the end of June/start of July. Anyway here's Dorothy finally revealing more of herself to me after a year. Dorothy as a character is like, I truly believe she is capable of killing a man but the story she is in just does not allow that so I am trying to grow her unhinged side a little bit in other ways bc I know she has it in her but I also really cannot deal with the plot repercussions of her actually killing a man! I'm sorry Dotty but this'll have to do!

(cw for groping/a man being creepy as hell, death/funeral mention, drug mention, drowning imagery kinda)

There’s too much to tell Felix. That his sister lives on the fringe of Castro and has attended three funerals since September; that it’s January 11th and she’s already attended one this year. That his sister drives through sunsets and imagines parties: the amber dusk, warm mosaic tiles, platters of Greek salad skewers and shrimp tostadas, and sometimes Jolie joins her and they share a blunt on the hill. That his sister bought an aquamarine body-length dress for six bucks in a thrift store sale bin, so when her and Jolie broke up for the second time, she waltzed into a sunset party, locked arms with a CEO’s son and gave him a fake number and plucked strawberries out of champagne and blended so well nobody noticed when she left. That during the summer of ’83, his sister walked a neighbour’s Golden Retriever on Wednesdays, and on the sixth Wednesday he gave her a wad of tens with one hand and palmed the back of her neck with the other, so she walked his dog to the beach and stole another hundred from his wallet. That his sister bombed an interview for a Nursing school and didn’t get home until night and missed their monthly call, and Jolie heard the phone ring and didn’t take a message, so his sister snuck into the CEO’s son’s villa and floated in the centre of their heated pool like a cloud. A pause, a breath, an Opheliean threat.

life cycle of massive stars ;

Switched to LCOMS this month because I was burnt out with RR and it made such the difference! I really love working on two novels at once because it keeps me consistently creative but also both of these books are so different so its always refreshing to bounce back into one from another. I have a whole update in the drafts rn for this so keeping this part brief but still love this book, still the best thing that has ever happened to me, me and this book will have a glorious summer wedding etc etc. These excerpts are from chapters that summarise the first semester of each character's first year and have to say it. has been Very Fun to get into the mindset of Freshers Melodrama. Here's Junie having a crisis and an unhealthy relationship with her hetero flatmate :( (alcohol cw for both excerpts)

In October you are drinking double espresso and trying to breathe normally in lectures and you are trying to figure out your favourite colour because Fleur asked and you stumbled out an answer (Purple, I think. Violet? Lavender? Indigo?) and it didn’t match hers (I like yellow. I like sunlight). You buy mugs from IKEA to paint you paint cats and fireworks and constellations and moon phases and daisies. You try to scratch paint stains off your desk. You do laundry at 2am. In October you colour code your notes with pastel highlighters. You go to the library at 3am. You paint your nails sunlight and hate it. You finish an essay that’s due in December. You knock on Fleur’s door at 8am so she makes her 9am. You wear off the shoulder tops and you let a girl dab glitter on your collarbones and you are watching Fleur kiss a boy from the neighbouring hall. You bite your sunlight nails. You break the handle off your IKEA constellation mug. You leave your keys in a lecture hall and stand at the reception for forty minutes waiting for them to realise that the keys on the desk have the moon chain you mentioned - or, you are waiting to say it yourself. You are watching the rain trail down your window. In October you get a halo headband tangled in your hair you are sipping a vampire themed cocktail that tastes like acetone you rip your heels off and you go home early and do laundry at 2am and you are waiting for the courage to tell Fleur you don’t like clubbing - or, you are waiting for her to ask where you are. In October you are many things / a good student a dancer a painter an angel a big sister an alarm clock you are nocturnal and a lucid dreamer and confused about your sexuality / and it’s still October but it’s not because it’s November now and you are still Junie but not because you don’t know who Junie is. It’s November, it’s September October November December. It’s 2016 2017 2018 2019. You are fragments and you don’t know if you are a kaleidoscope or shattered glass.

And here's first year Tomas being like I Moved Countries For University And All I Got Was Homesickness And A Crush On My Flatmate And Resurging Autistic Symptoms And This Lousy T Shirt (cw: vomit mention, injection mention, parental death mention)

Kristen is seven months younger and five inches taller than you. He’s the last flatmate you met and the only one you talk to beyond kitchen greetings and passive aggressive texts about dirty dishes. He is too quiet and too loud and not the type of person you befriend. The first night, he lost Ring of Fire and downed the concoction of Echo Falls, Dark Fruits, Jack Daniels and coke, vodka and lemonade alongside a cigarette and said he’d let God figure out the rest. He held your hair back when you threw up amaretto and held onto your knee when you first self-injected testosterone. He taught you Yorkshire dialect and you pretended to understand the Yorkshire dialect. He told you he got diagnosed at four and you told him you didn’t get past the first assessment but sometimes you flick the bathroom light on and it’s fire: the orange on the orange towel is louder, the white on the white tiles are louder, the colours and light and sink and showerhead are prickly and all you can do is blink and breathe until it fizzles out. You reminded him to take his meds and asked if you were weak for wanting to drop out and hop on the first Eurostar to Rotterdam. He reminded you to take off your binder and asked if he was robotic for not grieving his mother. You spent inky nights on the kitchen floor, counting the dead flies in the lights and scooping crumbly coconut ice cream out of a maker you got for half price in TK Maxx. You spent dusk-dusted afternoons at the global street food markets, at the vegan markets. Spent student loans on raspberry lemonade in recycled cups, veggie burgers in beetroot buns, got him hooked on poffertjes and advocaat and could’ve cried when the vendor spoke to you in Dutch. Sometimes you didn’t buy anything. Just liked hovering at stalls ambered with fairy lights, writing down Etsy stores on your notes app; just liked Kristen’s impulse to trek forty minutes into the city for a market he didn’t know existed until five minutes before; just liked how he always invited only you, cancelling your other plans last minute, the feeling of being ambushed; just liked how he stopped to take photos of dogs and the sunset; just liked how he looked haloed under lampposts waiting for Ubers, golden on golden.

This is also nearing creative nonfiction because Sheffield truly is a haven for just. vegan markets and cafes lol! I experimented with veganism there and never struggled to find something and at this point I call myself a fake vegan because it's too easy to be vegan in Sheffield and too difficult to be vegan in my actual hometown. And the global street food markets!!! SO GOOD! I miss pre pandemic days

nocturne for the holy ;

Giving her a little shout out because she does exist actually! I've figured out a really good system for working on two novels at a time, so my plan is maybe to start properly on this after I finish either RR or LCOMS. Idk I got 3 novels to pick from haha oops! I did do some free drafting back in April though and found it recently and I Like It! And I edited it so it counts as Something I Did This Month :) Also have decided that I loathe this working title <3 Okay see you with an update for this novel in like a year, sorry for the absolute zero context for this excerpt hehe

The morning I was due back, I hadn’t yet decided that this would be my last visit. I wandered between rooms like an overstayed guest, like I didn’t know which crockery lived in which cabinet and which bedroom had the best view of the overlapped hills. Dad would wake for his run in an hour, plastered to his twenty-year-old routine. Mum would pretend to be asleep until breakfast. Until then, it was myself and the house, hazed by sleepy sunrise. Downstairs. The peeling paisley wallpaper in the lounge, the lilies in the middle of the kitchen table, the vases of candy floss pink peonies wilting on every windowsill, the desolate double swing-set in the garden. The mist-clogged mornings. I stood outside in my dressing-gown until my fingertips felt numb. Upstairs. The sage coloured bathroom. The bathtub I’d laze in with my clothes on and no water because it was the quietest room in the house. The dusty dance trophies on the top of my wardrobe. Wine-flushed Jeanette in my teenage bedroom. The stale grey mum painted my teenage bedroom after I moved out. Minus their room, I stalked the layout of the house three times before settling back into bed - teenage Nora’s bed. Nora who cared for peonies and pushed her brother on the swing set and flung her ceramic ballerina at the wall and jogged with her father and collected wine bottles and acorns and kisses from girls who were supposed to visit for dance practice. Before I left, I’d have cycled each room another three times. And in every room he was there, hovered in the corner like black mould.

love this update bc it's like i've got my third person, my second person, my first person! collecting all the POVs like chaos emeralds :)

eulogy for our burnings ;

-looks away-

girl help I did it AGAIN!!!! Apparently Camp Nano is just the perfect time for me to get novel ideas. I made this post specifically to talk a bit about this because I have no idea when I'll draft it but it's certainly not soon. This is not me trying to doubt my own skill but I feel like I am not in the place I'd like to be as a writer to tackle this project with the zest it needs, however I am v excited by the prospect of it! Don't know how I feel about the working title bc I'm like "that doesn't sound right but I don't know enough about this wip to dispute it" but the only purpose my working titles serve is to sound pretty lol! But here's the tea:

1991, UK.

2nd person present + past. Very flexible form. I can't decipher how yet but I'm feeling interviews, newspaper articles, receipts, grocery store lists weaved with actual narrative, that kinda vibe.

Best summary is we follow our nameless narrator, a stealth trans man, as he becomes unhealthily obsessed with a man who "hires" him to photograph the buildings he burns

Very,,, isolated? Minimal settings, minimal characters, minimal prose etc. Almost claustrophobic

There's basically only two characters and they are probably the most morally deplorable, indefensible characters I've created which just means most of you are gonna LOVE this /lh I do too I do too

Only comp title I can give is it has the vibes/tone of Boy Parts by Eliza Clark (just with none of the nsfw content lol if you've read the book you know what I'm talking about) (also that book is great for morally deplorable women protagonists but omg look up the content warnings because it caught me off guard! enjoyed it tho gave it 4 stars)

The pinterest board is the best visualisation of the Vibes also follow me on pinterest lol

And that's all I've got today! A bigger Life Cycle of Massive Stars update coming in the next few weeks. Might do a proper intro post for Eulogy For Our Burnings but idk!!! It's a surprise :) Thank you for reading this far!

#also i have LOTS to catch up on so if u tagged me in anything im gonna do a big queue of rb's soon!#promise im not ignoring anybody!#just barely functioning <3 #atlastracking #writing update #revelations revelations #life cycle of massive stars #nocturne for the holy #eulogy for our burnings

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cattles-bians · 3 years

Text

exes au part 12

post directory

obsetress: don’t ask why i had this thought because i couldn’t tell you but

obsetress: jamie wakes up in the middle of the night one night and is like “i... had a dream. about vi”

obsetress: and dani’s like “ok baby” and just nuzzles deeper into her pillow and jamie’s like

obsetress: “no, dani, a... a dream”

obsetress: and dani’s like “oh. oh” and is immediately wide awake and bright eyed

obsetress: and is like “was it any good?” and jamie is just. already flushed so red and flushed deeper and dani just hums

em: sighs wistfully

em: i also love that something compels jamie to tell dani Immediately

em: oh the perils of begrudgingly being friends w ur gfs ex

em: jamies like um. no see i can see all these different things my brain mashed together and WHY i had this dream and danis like ok but that wasn’t my question....

obsetress: jamie finally throws up her hands “of course it was”

em: jamie: And You Can’t Tell Vi She’ll Be Insufferable

obsetress: dani, very plainly, at brunch the next morning: so vi

obsetress: jamie looks like she’s going to have a heart attack and dani lets her sweat and then just smiles sweetly “i like those sunglasses. are they new?”

em: jamie what’s the problem (nothin. indigestion)

obsetress: dani very smug n thinks she’s very funny

obsetress: (she is a little funny)

em: one of jamies many ‘oh that’s why they dated’ moments

obsetress: “fookin sick, the both of ya”

em: idk why you had this thought but i’m GREATLY amused

obsetress: skskksksks right

obsetress: jamie explaining her dream to dani in great detail afterwards

obsetress: dani sitting there nodding and hmming “oh that sounds like her. no, she wouldn’t do that. now THAT she would be very good at, you’d like it”

em: i need a moment

em: jamie thinks the dark hides her massive fucken blush but it Doesn’t

em: dani can feel her heating up

obsetress: jamie “i don’t ask you to do this” dani “you’re not stopping me”

em: dani critiquing jamies sex dream is such a fucken funny concept sjdhdkhdkdhdkc

obsetress: RIGHT

obsetress: i’m dying

em: dani: oh no that’s OOC

obsetress: she wouldn’t have a riding crop jamie, it’s 2021, not 16—

em: jamie: it’s a wet dream do u really think it’s gonna have beta readers and a three act structure

em: dani hums

obsetress: dani: well did you enjoy it

obsetress: jamie: i— dani: did you?

obsetress: jamie mumbling yeah

em: jamies like i’m gonna interrogate dani next time, see how she feels- but she forgets dani is incapable of feeling shame

obsetress: like dani wouldn’t just launch into a ramble

---

em: viola

obsetress: fuck

obsetress: yeah

obsetress: to jamie, specifically,

em: to jamie specifically andhdjhdjd

em: once again ironic jamvi has turned, in my brain, into ‘yes and....’ jamvi

—-

obsetress:

obsetress: jamie sending this to viola n vi's like

obsetress: she doesn't get it because she's convinced her taste is immaculate

---

em: anyway this is ooc even for exes au but i keep thinking abt like. jamie tryna crack how old viola is (she cant be 34 im 30 it doesnt make sense) and going through her fb timeline like. 'aha! motivational quotes. gotta be late 30s' and danis either like

em: danis either like 'you have a notebook where you write down all the quotes you like baby' OR shes like haha ok thats fair (posts another motivational quote on her fb)

obsetress: god i love that so much

obsetress: both of those dani responses are

obsetress: honestly porque no los dos if we're already going ooc

obsetress: i do think the first bit "gotta crack it she can't be 34 i'm 30 it doesn't make sense" is in character fwiw

em: obviously i was inspired by ur post in the milf channel abt viola always saying shes 35

em: big brain

—-

obsetress: this is literally just. exes au rebecca

obsetress: down to the caption

obsetress: vi and rebecca patiently staging like full photoshoots for each other every time one of them wants a pic otp: i'm not high maintenance, you're just low effort

---

em: bold 2 say that we don’t think about jamie and vi tho

em: gotta keep some sorta. presentation of respectability

em: they absolutely couldn’t date tho

obsetress: lmao ikr

obsetress: yeah no they'd kill each other

obsetress: now just thinking of silly circumstances and um

obsetress: rebecca's out of town and dani's flying back from some iowa thing jamie couldn't get away for to go with

obsetress: and viola's like "oh, just stay at ours, it's closer and i'll get you a car"

obsetress: and just like

obsetress: imagining the two of them cohabitating at vi's for a night

em: jamie sneaking around at night tryna find the bathroom and runs straight into vi in a face mask and a dangerously low dressing gown Again

obsetress: the parallels to canon

obsetress: im giggling

obsetress: walks straight into her path

em: opens a door. sees something she doesn’t want to see. immediately turns and walks away

em: god the face mask would make her look like the lady in the lake

obsetress: yeah

obsetress: vi wants to go out to dinner, jamie's just like "i'm already getting up early to go to the airport, can't we just have an easy night in"

em: what did i say before. that thing abt if ur friends w damie you will inevitably walk in on them

obsetress: god yeah

em: flip of that.

obsetress: oh GOD

em: god they would argue about dinner

em: bicker about EVERYTHING

em: dani and rebecca both make the married couple joke

em: jamie goes pale

obsetress: wait sorry i just went back to tahirahs insta post and like

obsetress: katie parker commented and was like "i love these shots of you" and she was like "thanks luv " and i'm like

obsetress: why does this....... still track........... with exes au...............

em: perdy is always a little too flirty w vis paramours

obsetress: always! except dani for whatever reason

obsetress: she's just scared of dani

em: Please

obsetress: rebecca's like "i don't see what the problem is. she can do what she wants, but you trust me, don't you?" "of course i trust you" rebecca shrugs "that's it then, isn't it?"

obsetress: anyway vi huffs n crosses her arms n pouts a little bit and is like "well i don't want her to"

obsetress: rebecca is endeared and uses the opportunity to her advantage like the top leaning switch she is

em: dani rebecca parallels: always dtf

obsetress: perdi and vi fighting and vi's like "are you even gay? or do you just want what i have?" and perdi is like "does it matter?"

em: are you even gay perdi nahdkdhdkdhd

em: perdi is like you KNOW about jamie and viola crinkles her nose bc she forgot about that and she’s starting to respect jamie as a person

obsetress: djflakdkfjldkadjLDJFLSKDFJLSDKFJx

obsetress: i screeched

em: viola: you only MET jamie because i hired her for landscaping you fucking-

obsetress: just thinking about perdita watching jamie working on some property sweating in a tank top and Deciding

em: bringing out some lemonade etc

em: haha you look parched

obsetress: smiling widely, turning on the charm

obsetress: jamie is very attractive and very swoonworthy, but perdita 100% only goes for it because she refuses to let viola have one (1) thing

obsetress: and that extends to lesbianism

em: viola's like no this is normal right. siblings competing. rivalries etc and danis like uh i’m an only child and jamies like uh i raised my brother

em: they don’t know how to tell her sure it happens but it’s also extremely fucken weird vi

obsetress: jamie: you have to tell her dani: why do i have to tell her jamie: you tell her everything dani: i don't tell her–– ok, i tell her most things. i'm not sure i want to tell her this though jamie: why not dani: she's not... she's not gonna like it jamie: So You Might Be A People Pleaser,

em: jamie: i can’t tell her. she’s only just forgotten the perdi thing. what if she remembers i’ve

em: in depth character study of viola and perdi’s fucked up rivalry

em: violas like goddamn it do i have to fuck jamie to get even

obsetress: i––

em: she decides against it

em: jamie is none the wiser

obsetress: she Considers it tho

em: jamie would die on the spot if she knew

obsetress: weighs the pros and cons

obsetress: the best part is like

obsetress: this is all post-danvi and pre-damie right so when dani n jamie see rebecca and vi at that video store

obsetress: viola's like wait.

obsetress: wait

obsetress: dani ending up with the hot gardener her sister fucked because she has bizarre jealousy and possession issues is really just the cherry on top of a shit sundae

em: the funniest part of all our very tangled lore is like

em: none of it contradicts bc it’s even funnier when it’s Extremely Ugly And Messy

em: because lesbians are just... like that

---

obsetress: exes au au where viola did fuck jamie, the video rental shop scene is 100 times more awkward

em: don’t think about it don’t think about it dont

em: i am thinking about it

em: jamie has to deal with having been railed by all three of them instead of just the two

em: it feels very uneven to her bc rebeccas a doll, dani, u don’t understand, and ur only running into one ex,

obsetress: talk about the mortifying ordeal of being known

obsetress: "wait, that's your ex?" "yeah" "dani" "what" "dani" "what" jamie's voice is hushed but a lil pitchy and a lot panicky "i think i fucked your ex" "you think?" "i fucked your ex" "you fucked her or she fucked you? because i'm sorry, baby, but i really don't think––"

em: sorry, baby, but i really don’t think-

em: SCREAMED

obsetress: that might be my fave lil bit i've ever written adlfkjasdklf

em: dani being a little too interested in jamie getting railed is like. everything to me

obsetress: jamie's already big blushing

em: a little secret between hannah obsetress and em cowlesbian but i am So thinking abt it

em: patreon exclusive exes au au

[em edit: you can imagine how long this lasted]

obsetress: no one is happy about this situation except dani, who is delighted

em: after, jamie's like. what did u mean by u don’t think that...

em: puffs out her chest

em: i could have-

em: danis like yeah but i know u didn’t did u

obsetress: dani clayton ilu

em: danis like um

em: completely unprompted bc dani ‘finishes a conversation 5 hours later’ is really funny to me

em: danis like i did tho

em: jamies like can you DROP IT

em: she’s SMUG

em: she’s so pleased w herself

obsetress: in bed with the lights off jamie's pulling the sheets up and closing her eyes afterthought

obsetress: just a happy lil hum and an "i did, though"

obsetress: and jamie knows IMMEDIATELY what she's talking about

em: dani never lets jamie live it down

obsetress: never!

obsetress: they'll be washing dishes one day "hey baby?" "hmm" "you slept with a landlord"

em: oh um. flipping the whole ‘experienced jamie virginal dani’ trope everyone loves but

em: i love the idea of dani being like hey jamie did u ever- and jamies like (grumbles) does it matter

em: dani is mentally applying a gold star to her chart

obsetress: ksdljfskdfjlsdjflksdjaf

obsetress: the gold star

em: at this point dani is absolute just tryna tease jamie so she’s like oh well when- and jamies like ok i get it

em: jamie Pretends not to be a little interested

obsetress: meanwhile vi and rebecca very matter of factly swapped stories the first day they Realized

obsetress: vibecca swapping stories and their stories complimenting each other so well that they're like well. hmm

obsetress: glad those two found each other

em: two praise kinks u say

em: ok sorry one more thought i’m thinking abt like

em: jamie staying over (idk if this is before or during damie) and viola and perdi are having yet another spat on the phone and violas like

em: no you ALWAYS do this, whatever you think you’re doing with rebecca-‘ and she barely hears some muffled sorta ‘oh, sorry, remember jamie-

em: and jamies doing the maths. hmm

em: jamies like actually i refuse to examine this further. self care

em: brings it up with dani later and dani LOSES her shit laughing

em: haha jamie you got willoughby’ed

obsetress: SCREAMS

obsetress: you got willoughby'd

obsetress: how does one get willoughbyd asking for a friend

em: yeah same asking for a friend

obsetress: dani, gigglesnorting: wait, you hooked up with... with perdi?

obsetress: (dani hates perdita because viola hates perdita and it is a deep seated hatred she refuses to unlearn)

obsetress: a loyalty strange and enduring, despite it all

em: to be fair perdi is the Worst

em: all of these characters i love to make sympathetic and then perdi is where i draw the line akdhdkhd

em: it’s funnier if she’s awful

em: like a viola that never gets therapy

obsetress: lldjfkaskldfj god same

obsetress: it's too good

em: danis like wait hold on. lemme get a pen

em: makes a silly little chart

em: if the fandom tries to make jamie into a shane the l word character i will simply take that and make jamie mortified abt her uh. well! a pretty girl is nice to her and she forgets how to behave

em: jamie's like oh sure like u don’t have embarrassing flings- and danis like yeah but i don’t interact w them on a daily basis jamie

em: also i didn’t fuck perdi

obsetress: skskskflsdflks

obsetress: "you did fuck perdi though, right? because that just be embarrassing, jamie, if she had been the one who..."

em: skgsdjhdkdhdk

em: jamie grumbles something abt pillow princesses and dani like

em: CLAPS her hands in glee

obsetress: jlsdjflkJSDFKJSDFJ

obsetress: GOD

obsetress: she's immediately pulling out her phone to text vi

em: jamies like why would u message her sister that u freak n danis like oh no theyre very open with each other it’s uh. hmm. anyway

#this is one of my faves won’t lie hfydyst #featuring perdita who is. just #a terrible little delight gshdjfjv #idk what to say about this one except um. i’m sorry #and i hope u can still look me in the eye despite #being a grotty little multishipper #the dani jamie viola rebecca exes au #longggg one

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theumbrellaacademytickle · 5 years

Text

Little Klaus (1)

In which Klaus is somehow deaged and the siblings take advantage of this. Also Ben's alive BC fuck you he ain't dead in my books.

When Klaus woke up he didn't notice anything different. He didn't feel different, look different or act different.

So why is it that when he went downstairs to line up for lunch (as usual) there were five strange adults in the living room?

This lead Klaus to where he was now, backed against the door he entered by and staring at the adults, who seemed to be staring at him.

"W-who are you people?" He said, cursing himself mentally for stuttering over the first word, "What are you doing here?"

"Is anyone else seeing a baby Klaus?" The Asian man muttered, eyes flicking disbelievingly between the other adults and Klaus's own.

Klaus stepped back again, "H-how do you know my name?! Where's my siblings!?" Panic had begun to rise in his chest, and he slowly started to open the door behind him, inch by agonizing inch.

"What are we supposed to do?" A man clad in leather asked, ignoring Klaus's questions, "He clearly has no clue what's going on!"

"Klaus," a smaller woman asked, getting down onto her knees (not that it was necessary, Klaus was sure he wasn't that much shorter than her), "we aren't here to hurt you, I promise. Can you tell me what year it is?"

Green eyes flicking from each adult with panic, he answered hesitantly, "2001, why?"

A rush of hushed whispers filled the room at his answer, but Klaus had finally opened the door to an amount he could slip out of and he wasn't planning on overstaying his welcome. The 12 year old flew out of the room, taking off his clunky shoes as he ran (they were slowing him down) and running barefooted throughout the mansion.

"Come on," he muttered, panicked tears pricking at his eyes, "the others have to be somewhere!"

Hearing the yells of the adults behind him only made him panic more, and he ran over the polished wooden floors, skidding and slipping as he went but never once staying in the same place for a second. As he was heading towards the bedrooms (he was sure if his siblings were anywhere they'd be there, heading down for breakfast) he ran straight into Five. The two collided and fell to the ground, rubbing their heads before clocking each existence. Five's brow furrowed in confusion before Klaus grabbed him and shoved him into the ex-junkies room, and he shoved a chair against the door in a pitiful attempt at a barricade. Still confused, Five spoke up.

"Klaus?"

Klaus's face crumpled, and he flung himself at the 13 year old (who to be frank didn't look much different at 12). "Five," he breathed out in a panicked voice, "I-I can't find the others! Diego and Vanya, even Luther is missing! And dad isn't anywhere to be found! All I found were five adults downstairs, and I don't know who they are. I'm so glad you're ok!" His eyes had filled with tears and he buried his face into Five's neck.

"Klaus," Five asked gently, putting his arms awkwardly around the pre-teen, "W-what year is it?"

"2001, but what does it have to do with anything?"

***le time skip before this gets super long***

"So, let me get this straight," Klaus stated, "The year is 2019, these people are obviously our siblings judging by the tattoos and what I'm assuming is Vanya's lack of one, and you are in the body of a 13 year old because you travelled forward in time to prevent the apocalypse and it did some weird doolally kinda space stuff and left you like that?"

Raising his eyebrows at the choice of words, Five simply said, "Yes."

"Huh. Ok. Then why am I twelve instead of..." He paused to count on his fingers, "30? Holy hell!" His eyes widened comically, "You guys are really really old!"

Laughing gently, Ben responded, "We don't know Klaus."

"I should assume that it's something to do with the space-time continuum being messed up," Five murmured absently to himself, "but with the timeline being as fragile as it is right now I am exceedingly reluctant to mess about with it some more."

"Wait," Klaus cried, "Are you saying that I'm gonna be stuck as the youngest sibling now??!!"

"Oh, this is priceless!" Diego crowed, a large grin on his face, "Who'd have thought large beansprout Klaus would end up being the baby?"

"Oi!" The pre-teen shouted, pouting, "I'm not a baby at all!"

"You sure look like one," the leather clad man teased, and Allison huffed out a laugh, thwacking him on the head.

"Behave, you idiot," she admonished, "it's gotta be scary being stuck in that situation. It could just as easily be you."

"So," Five started, "if Klaus is going to be stuck like this for the moment, unless it doesn't wear off in which case it's permanent, I think we should try and let him get to know us and start to live a normal life."

"TRUTH OR DARE!" Klaus screamed in excitement, already running to the living room to plop himself on a couch, "SCHNELL SCHNELL!"

***another time skip Yeet***

Eventually everyone was sat in the living room (Five and Luther may have needed a little bit of coaching to get them there) and Klaus grinned widely in glee.

"Youngest to oldest, so me then Five, then in numerical order we can go Vanya, Ben, Allison, Diego and Luther!" He crowed in excitement, before turning to Five (who was quietly drinking his coffee).

"Five, truth or dare?"

Thinking for a moment, Five responded, "Dare."

"I dare you..." Klaus pondered, before pouting cutely, "I can't think of anything."

Ben leaned over and whispered into his ear, and Klaus perked up significantly, "I dare you to sit in Allison's lap for the rest of the game!"

Unable to stay mad at the seance's adorable excitement, Five grumbled good-naturedly as Allison pulled him into her lap. Five quickly turned to Ben, eager to get the attention off himself.

"Ben, truth or dare?"

"I'm gonna be boring and go with truth."

"You never know what music's on the radio now, so I have to ask, what is it that you're always listening to in your headphones?"

Laughing shyly, Ben answered, "It's... It's Kpop. Korean pop. I don't know how I got into it, I think big you introduced me to it Klaus," he laughed, getting the youngest's attention.

"Really, who's my favourite groups?"

"Well, you thirst over Jungkook from BTS," Ben teased, watching Klaus turn crimson, "but your favourite groups at the moment are BLACKPINK and Hellovenus."

"Can you show me them after we're done?"

"Sure." Ben turned to Vanya, "I think Five just wanted to ask me that question and forgot the order haha, so Vanya truth or dare?"

"Hmm... Dare."

"I dare you to pick an outfit out of big Klaus's wardrobe and wear it all day!"

Laughing incredulously, Vanya made her way to Klaus's bedroom. 5 minutes later, she came down in a pair of tight leather shorts, mesh top with a loose crop top (with the word GAY in pink on black) over the top of it, and a bright pink feather boa. "Look at this madness!" She laughed in delight, shimmying over to Klaus who was giggling non-stop. She took the feather boa off and hooked it around his skinny torso, and Klaus burst into belly laughter as she shimmied it closer towards her.

"Vanya," he laughed, "Stop it! It tickles!!"

"Oh does it really?" She smiled, "Couldn't tell, truly!"

While trying to escape the feather boa, Klaus hadn't noticed Diego sneaking up behind him and lifting him up.

"You seriously thought we'd forget how ticklish little you was? Shame on you Klaus!" The leather clad man laughed as Klaus kicked his bare feet.

"No, please don't tickle me!" He giggled nervously as Vanya stepped towards him, wiggling her fingers menacingly.

"Sorry, what's that? I couldn't make it out between the giggles," she teased, and as Klaus opened his mouth to speak again she started tickling his armpits.

Klaus instantly began giggling, kicking his legs in the air in a weak protest against the tickling. He had always been weak and frail against his siblings, the slightly too skinny one, the one who was sensitive. His protesting was half hearted as his mouth spewed out bubbly giggles.

"Nohohoho fair! Vanyahahahaha plehehehehease!!!"

"It has been too long since we tickled him," Allison laughed, Five still on her lap. The teen was looking at the scene in front of him, a rare fond smile on his face.

"Why don't you join in?" Diego laughed, "Luther take the baby from me."

At Allison's squeal of delight, Luther grabbed the kid by the wrists, sitting the underweight preteen across his lap (image BC this is a strange thing to describe???)

He grabbed the boys skinny wrists and carefully lifted them over his head, pinning them with one large hand against the couch. Knowing he was completely exposed, Klaus just laid there, bursting out into squeaky giggles as Allison went straight for his sides.

"So cute~~" The woman cooed as Klaus helplessly kicked his little feet, struggling to pull down his arms.

"Allisohohohon!! Stahahahahap!"

"Oh no, sweetheart, we're only just beginning!" She grinned, and lifted his shirt up. Klaus began to giggle apprehensively, chanting no's under his breath.

"Oh yes," Allison grinned teasingly, "I remember squeaky toy Klaus, don't the rest of you?"

A manicured nail poked the inside of Klaus's bellybutton, and he let out a squeak. His face flushed red at the adoring coos from his siblings, but he didn't have time to retaliate because Allison lightly scribbled her fingers across his flat stomach, causing him to burst once more into giggly laughter. Eventually, when the woman was done and Luther let him go, Klaus curled up in her lap, giggling cutely as she lightly rubbed his stomach.

"That feel good, Klaus?"

A sleepy nod confirmed her statement, and Allison grinned widely.

"There's not long left, baby, wanna see the game through?"

The final three finally took their turn. Allison had chosen truth, and was told to pick the current cutest UA member (Klaus was an easy win), Luther chose dare and was dared to hang upside down on the railing reciting the entirety of Eminem's Rap God while Klaus was dared to have his bellybutton (his well-known weakest spot) tickled for five minutes non stop. However, at the end of the game, with a giggly little baby Klaus still snuggling into her lap ready to fall asleep, Allison was excited to see how long this would last.

#the umbrella academy #ticklish klaus #tickler allison #tickler vanya #accomplice luther #accomplice diego #ben is alive #five is cute #little klaus #happy klaus #klaus gets love #klaus is adorable #klaus is the leeiest lee to ever lee

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phynali · 6 years

Note

hey! just saw your post on nb aesthetic esp your tags abt you having long "non-visibly-queer" hair & idk if you remember this or not but I do bc it was super helpful/positive for me to see it - I sent you an ask awhile ago abt you being queer&genderqueer and talking abt your husband/you guys being happy and see you say this is p much the same feeling - I'm p sure I’m nb?but also ppl have said I’m obvs not bc (among other things) I have long hair not a “queer” haircut so I must be fake & (1/2)

(2/2) sometimes I feel like I am fake but so seeing that post in general was nice but also seeing your comment was rly, rly, rly nice & I can’t really articulate how ! it was to see you say that you’ve got long hair too and are still nb & it feels weird to thank you for just talking about your existence? but. it really is incredibly helpful to see that so - thank you.

hey

thanks for sending this message. it was actually really affirming for me? just the reminder that i’m not alone with feelings like this.

i’m so sorry that people have tried to tell you that you’re not not nb because you don’t have the right ~aesthetic~. it’s honestly such bullshit. there is no one ‘right’ way to “look” nonbinary. you can dress in skirts and dresses and do your makeup up to the nines with long flowing hair and still identify as nonbinary, as a woman, or as a man. presentation =/= identity. same with the opposite. you can crop your hair short and wear men’s cut clothes and zero makeup and still identify as nonbinary, as a man, or as a woman. the clothes on our backs and the cuts of our hair don’t define who we are inside.

and heck, i admire the people with awesome haircuts that are protypically or aggressively queer. i love those styles, i really do. i even envy them sometimes, and part of me definitely has daydreamed about getting a cut like that more than once. but there’s a level of visibility that comes along with it (and i’m self-conscious to begin with) and because i am married (to a man), most people who’ve met me will probably not even pick up on the message about my identity anyway. so who am i getting the cut for? myself? or strangers on the internet to put the rubber stamp of approval next to my gender identity?

and i struggle with the hair thing in part because i’ve tried to do the short hair and it looked like crap (i.e., it made me look younger and childish at a time when i was aiming for the opposite, and most stylists i went to for short haircuts weren’t giving me a queer look so much as giving me a short haircut that was ‘in’ at the time but distinctly for women?). i also hate the upkeep on short hair because it grows so fast and no way am i willing to go for a cut more often than i do now. kudos to all the people out there who can upkeep short hair.

i also grew up with my father and older brother having long hair for most of my childhood, and my mother shaved all her hair off one year and then had short hair for about 5 years, so i don’t inherently associate short hair = masculine and long hair = feminine. i’m actually typically attracted to long hair on guys? and them having long hair doesn’t detract from their masculinity, so i try not to let myself get too worried about my own long hair.

anyway, all this is to say that i recently realized i’ve got insecurities about the length of my hair with respect to my gender identity, maybe because the past few years have been the first time in my life where i actually like my hair and don’t want to change it, but that means accepting and dealing with any hang-ups i have about it as it is now. it fits how i want to see myself, even if the rest of the world makes their own misguided assumptions about me because of it.

but back to you.

if someone ever tries to tell you that you aren’t nonbinary (esp. over something as ridiculous as the length of your hair), they’re an asshole, full stop. they don’t know your gender identity better than you. and if they purport to tell you they know your gender and you don’t, they’re an asshole, and nbphobic (exorsexist? idk the right terms, honestly).

it’s happened to me. more than once. but this one time in particular, i came out as genderqueer to a friend (an ex) and the first words out of his mouth, honestly just an automatic knee-jerk reaction so fast, were “no. you’re not.” and i just. i was flabbergasted. because how dare this dude dare tell me what i am and am not? as if he knows my gender identity better than i do? so i said “yes. i am.” and he shifted uncomfortably in his seat and i said i always had been and finally found the word to describe it and he said “okay” and that was that.

other people don’t know your experiences better than you. other people don’t get to pick your labels for you. i’ve had people try to tell me i should id has genderfluid instead of genderqueer and i just… rolled my eyes. like no, thanks for trying to fit me into a term that makes you more comfortable, but i’ll define my identity as i experience it.

you’re not fake. you don’t have to look or act a certain way to know that you’re nonbinary.

i have days where i struggle with wondering if i’m faking it still, even though i’ve been defining my identity this way for over 6 years now, literally ever since the first time i discovered words for nonbinary identities and had that lightbulb moment of “oh. that’s it. that’s what i’ve been missing my entire life.” i struggle even though i look back and know my whole life till now, this is who i am. it fluctuates and varies a bit, yeah, but this is my truth. it’s always been my truth. even if the rest of the world has missed it (and honestly, not all of them did miss it, they just didn’t have language for it either, and a lot of people just want to put their heads in the sand when it comes to this stuff).

and i don’t bind and some days i wish i did. i’m a coward and i’m scared to buy a binder, but i secretly really want one. i don’t have a short or obviously queer haircut and i feel like the world will think i’m hiding and not queer enough when really i just happen to like my current style. i’m short as fuck and my voice is high like a chipmunk. so if anyone looks at or talks to me, they code me as a woman and there’s honestly nothing short of taking hormones i can ever do to change that, based on my body-type and characteristics. and that’s just part of my reality.

so i’m working on being satisfied with knowing my own self. with talking to friends and family when i feel comfortable enough to, and making sure they understand my identity and respect it. with living my gender identity and actualizing my masculinity in ways that feel affirming to me instead of ways that make me feel like i’m silly or trying too hard.

and that’s my general advice here: do what makes you feel right and good. do the things that make you feel like you fit in your own skin, if you can. affirm yourself that your experiences are valid. that your truth is real. doubt is normal, and it’s okay, and i experience it too. but your truth is your own, and everyone else can get bent.

#nonbinary #genderqueer #about me #personal post #i could talk about being nonbinary for days on end #figuring out my identity in the absence of having words to describe it in my teens?#was a mess.#so no matter how feminine i present now #people can pry my language and gender identity from my cold dead hands #gender #whoops i rambled #Anonymous #replies

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