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#best Bobby EVAH
thaliawashere · 9 months
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lahikmajoe · 4 years
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Stealing from little baby Jesus
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This is only a baby elf, but he looks malleable enough — Jesus should be even better
So is he coming, or isn’t he? Kids around the world, well the Christian &/or western world I should say, are wondering if & hoping that St. Nick makes an appearance tonight. Even in northern Germany, the little ones are waiting for the Weihnachtsmann (Christmas man, literally).
He purportedly comes early…
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keiths3dart · 3 years
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Max in The Black Lodge: a Life is Strange / Twin Peaks Crossover.
Part 3.
The thing most casual viewers don't realise about Chloe Price is just how vulnerable she is. For years she's projected this rebellious, 'Hella Gay, Fuck You’ attitude. Drink, drugs, sex, familial discord, flunking school, limited social circle, Chloe embraced the lot. Every self destructive impulse leapt upon with gusto.
It was all a front, Chloe's big secret was the fact that she's a sweet, funny, loving, and decent girl living to be loved. Whose father was taken from her. Whose best friend moved away and indeed moved on. Whose first love cheated on her (and with a man of all things!), then left. Who basically circled the emotional wagons and held the world at bay with a snarl and a defiant middle finger. Her demeanour, borne of feelings of abandonment and loneliness becoming a self fulfilling and self sustaining state of permanent friction and conflict in her life.
Well that was until Max came back into it. Until Max saved it. Numerous times. At a horrendous hidden psychological cost Max had still to face the bill for. Until Max peeled back the layers of hurt Chloe had padded her bruised heart with, letting the real Chloe shine back through, something Chloe had never allowed to happen, not since Rachel. Maybe not even with Rachel, maybe she'd even played up those traits since it seemed to be received positively by the volatile blonde.
And now Chloe finds herself in a remote woodland clearing looking down at Max's shoulder bag, abandoned on the ground next to the final forlorn dying embers of a small campfire.
She knows exactly how it feels.
Chloe was drained of everything, she felt like an empty shell just standing there in the clearing, unable to think. Her every fibre felt like it was plummeting into an infinitely dark abyss, dragging her thoughts with her.
Max had gone again. The love she had let back into her heart felt like it had been torn straight out of her chest. She felt so, just So. Fucking. Alone. Again.
As Chloe stood in the clearing trembling in dismay, Deputy Bobby Briggs scouted around the fringes of the clearing, looking for any signs of where Max had exited the clearing and what direction she had gone. His companion, the big Nez-Pence tribesman Deputy Hawk was poking about in the fire. His weathered face was grave.
Hawk was concerned. He knew this clearing. This place was known in his tribal legend, this had been the destination Agent Dale Cooper uncovered in his investigations into the greater mysteries unearthed by the Laura Palmer case. Cooper had disappeared at this very spot and had later returned. Different. Then, abruptly, he had left and no-one knew where. Even his superiors at the FBI had no idea. They'd been in Twin Peaks several years ago asking questions about Cooper, Gordon Cole and the other one, that insufferable little shit Albert Rosenthal.
Hawk looked at his partner with sadness. Poor Bobby, his father Major Briggs had disappeared too a few years later. Again on this very spot. Bobby continued to comb the perimeter but Hawk knew he would not find an exit trail. The darkening shadow on his heart told him that Max too had departed this earth for… The Other Place. Whatever the hell that was. The question was, would Max return like Cooper had? Or would her friend Chloe have to live with the loss and uncertainty of Max remaining missing. Hawk had seen how it had affected Bobby, and Bobby had not had the best of relations with his father. Hawk looked to Chloe now, his experienced eye could see she was on the verge of emotional collapse. Perhaps she too felt that sinking dread that seeped from the very ground of this supernatural place.
This was going to be a difficult conversation. Hawk knew he needed to talk to Chloe. Needed to say Something at least. But all his years of police experience couldn't provide more than a number of carefully nuanced platitudes he knew Chloe would see through in a second. Then go in to complete meltdown.
What could he do though? The truth of the matter, absolutely preposterous though it seemed was: that her friend Max had been taken from this place to, some other world/reality/dimension by persons/beings unknown for the purposes of fuck only knows and may / may not return at some undisclosed point in the future and may / may not be a barking mad murderous psychopath when they do.
“Fuck that” thought Hawk and Opted instead to use the hollow platitudes from the Crisis Response Management course Harry had sent him on when he made Deputy Chief.
“Chloe…” he began before he sensed something. A change in the air like static electricity or…
The whole of space and time exploded at once, spinning off in an infinite number of directions at once, the whole of creation in one spiralling maelstrom of light, sound, and sensation. Right in front of deputy Hawk.
But it was the sudden knee to the face that took the big man down.
Max was feeling dreamy, she'd lost herself in the soporific rhythm of the gentle shuffle beat for a moment. Or had it been hours?
This thought brought Max back to her senses. Her environment had been acting on her like a drug, lowering her alertness, subtly sedating her mind.
“That Food-Eater Jefferson must love it in here” Max thought venomously.
Almost on cue, like he'd been summoned by the very thought of his name, the head of Mark Jefferson turned to face Max.
“OLLEH XAM!” he said in that eerie style the inhabitants of this room used.
Max felt like recoiling from that gaze. Bad memories. But Max had grown to be made of sterner stuff. She would NOT let that scumbag have power over her. So she held the gaze, pouring all of her rage and loathing into that gaze. A gaze that would have reduced Chloe to ashes, would have sent Chuck Norris fleeing in panic to the florist to get something to apologize with, fell in vain upon the impassive face of Mark Jefferson as he now began to rise from his seat.
“I DLUOC ERUTPAC UOY NI A TNEMOM” he intoned, framing Max with his hands, like an imaginary camera.
Max had heard this particular speech before, and she began to edge away from Jefferson and the little man who now sat next to him, watching the whole exchange with amusement.
Suddenly the air was rend by a piercing scream. Max span round to see Rachel Amber, leaning forward in her chair, her face contorted in rage letting out this ungodly screech.
It stopped Mark Jefferson in his tracks.
“ON! OUY T’NOD TEG OT EVAH REH.” Rachel's voice sounded harsh and bitter and Max watched on as Rachel thrust forward her right hand towards a suddenly terrified Jefferson.
“”ESAELP, ON” he whined.
“ERIF! KLAW HTIW EM!” Rachel spat, as Jefferson, chair and all was consumed by a pillar of fire.
The little Man began to laugh and clap his hands again.
That was it for Max. Wherever she was, it was time to leave. And Rachel was coming with her.
“Rachel, let's get out of here” she said, grabbing Rachel by the arm.
Rachel looked up at her uncertainly.
“EREHT SI ON YAW TUO” the little man said solemnly.
“Mm m Max?” It was Rachel. Her voice hesitant but normal.
“Come on, we need to get back to Chloe” Max urged, pulling the bewildered blonde to her feet.
“Chloe? Yes. Chloe. Must get back to Chloe” Rachel mumbled, still appearing dazed and lost. Like someone abruptly woken from a very deep sleep.
“EREHT SI ON YAW TUO” the little man repeated. He looked to the two girls, a look of almost pity in his big eyes. “M’I YRROS”.
But still they ran. Through red draped, tile floored corridor after red draped, tile floored corridor. Every single one the same, every single one emerging back into the same room. The little man still sat. Watching on sadly.
Eventually Max collapsed to her knees in defeat. The little man was right. There was no way out. She was stuck here. Forever. Never to see her Chloe again. She wished she'd never come to this place. She'd managed to find Rachel only to share her fate. She wished she'd never… A desperate idea came to Max, she'd kept items with her when she'd rewound before, would it work with a human being? Was there any other option?
“Rachel, hold me tight and don't let go”.
“Jesus Max, is now the time?”
“You know what I mean” Max said, grabbing Rachel around the waist. “Now to rewind as far as possible, and please God get us both back to the woods and Chloe" Max thought as she reached forward to channel her strange power.
Suddenly, the little man jumped up in alarm, his eyes wide with fear.
“T’NOD ESU TAHT EREH!!!” He cried almost hysterically but it was too late.
Max had never thought there could be pain like the pain she felt. Searing up her arm and into her chest. And her head, her head felt like molten metal was being poured into it. Max was almost delirious with pain, everything was a strobing kaleidoscope of colour, she could no longer see the red Room. She couldn't see when she was going and she couldn't stop. But she could feel the weight of Rachel clutching at her, until the moment it all went black. The moment Max couldn't feel Rachel anymore. The moment Max couldn't feel anything anymore. There was only the black.
And then not even that.
The sudden change in the air had brought Chloe back to her senses. She looked up just in time to see it. The thing she could never describe. The thing deputy Hawk would never forget.
And then the two bodies came, flung out of the light as though they'd been spat out like used chewing gum. Rachel Amber and Max Caulfield. Rachel's knee catching the poor deputy chief square in the face knocking him down. Rachel was awake and trying to get up, holding her knee in pain.
Max lay still in a crumpled pile, like a discarded marionette.
Chloe didn't know what to do. She was so shocked by a succession of things that had just happened she just stood there wide eyed with shock.
Deputy Briggs had been caught unsighted by the whole thing, having been scanning the ground for traces of footprints. Suddenly the ground was lit as bright as day and there was a sharp crack followed by some dull thuds. He span round, automatically drawing his service revolver.
Rachel hit the ground in a heap, her knee throbbing having struck something on the way down. She felt like hammered shit and could barely adapt to the gloom after so long in the Red Room. She could just make out the fuzzy outline of Max lying in front of her and made to crawl towards her.
Max lay in a foetal position, her breathing was shallow, her chest barely moving, eyes closed. She might almost be asleep.
Hawk raised himself up into a sitting position, the right side of his face beginning to swell after the impact with Rachel's knee but the reason Hawk's head was spinning was due to the intense visions he'd seen when the gateway between worlds opened in front of him.
Chloe could see Rachel leaning over Max and it galvanized her into action. She dropped to her knees beside her two friends, joining Rachel in checking on the inert Max.
“Max? Max?” Chloe quavered, gently shaking her to no avail.
“She's breathing” Rachel was able to confirm.
No response from Max, she remained unconscious though reassuringly still alive. Rachel rolled to her side and tried to clear her head. Her vision was still fuzzy.
Chloe knelt, Max's head cradled in her lap, gently stroking her face. Tears dropped from her cheek and splashed onto Max's face. Chloe wiped them away with concern
“Shit, sorry Max”.
Bobby had holstered his weapon and checked on Hawk, the big man seemed a bit shook up but otherwise ok. Now he had to take charge of the situation, it looked like one of the girls was hurt. They'd need to get back out of the woods quickly. Time was of the essence, and the hospital in Twin Peaks was a long hike and a bumpy ride away.
“We need to get her back to town” he said, placing a hand on Chloe's shoulder. “Are you ok? Can you walk?” He added towards Rachel.
Rachel simply nodded in affirmative and unsteadily began to get to her feet. Bobby moved to help Chloe with Max.
“No, leave her. I've got her” Chloe sobbed, recoiling from Bobby.
Deputy Hawk had made it to his feet and was on the radio to the sheriff. An ambulance had been summoned and would meet them at the road end.
Chloe lifted Max out of the nest of pine needles. She felt so light, so fragile. How could something so fundamentally central to her life feel so insubstantial in her arms?
And thus the procession made their way down from the Ghost wood. Bobby took the lead followed by the still woozy Hawk. Chloe came next with Max and Rachel Amber brought up the rear, her head rapidly clearing, now just feeling bone tired.
“Don't worry my love, everything is going to be fine” Chloe cooed to the unconscious Max.
Behind them, a strange flicker danced in the eyes of Rachel for a moment before it was gone.
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laufire · 3 years
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SPN (I am sorry, I have to xDD)
How are you not tired of hearing me talk about SPN. Hoooow xDD.
Anyway, for the meme’s purpose: I’m caught up with exactly where I left the show the first time around, aka the s4 finale.
the first character I ever fell in love with: Ruby, hands down. I already knew she was a demon going in (3x01 was my first episode ever), but even if I hadn’t I would’ve fallen for her with the reveal in 3x02. She remains my fave and one of the greatest characters in the entire show, IMO. The best of those sons of bitches!
a character that I used to love/like, but now do not: hmm, n/a for now I guess? Beyond my back and forth with everything Dean Winchester I guess xDD
a ship that I used to love/like, but now do not: same?
my ultimate favourite character™: Ruby, although Castiel has a lot going for him and he could have an edge later on.
prettiest character: I’m going with Bela Talbot, although there are countless beautiful characters (women) in this show. But like. The way they styled her especially?? She was in SIX EPISODE, sometimes in as little as just one (1) scene?? But they went ALL OUT. Honorable mention  to young!John Winchester. He had NO RIGHT to be so stupidly pretty. He was Dick Grayson pretty!! Dick Grayson!! It’s horrible xD
my most hated character: Dean. Our relationship is Complicated(TM) (he’s a Schrödinger fave lol), but he’s particularly irksome in s4 so (MUST he be Right All The Time, even when he’s being a massive piece of shit?? Tell me again how it’s okay for your brother to die during detox because “at least he dies human!!” you walking waste).
my OTP: Samruby forevah and evah. I have a pretty nice shipping armada with this show already, and as you can personally attest I could probably ship Castiel with a rock xD, but Samruby has a very special place in my heart. It was very formative.
my NOTP: there are some ships that I sort-of-hate because of Dean’s involvement but I have to admit they don’t leave me ~unaffected smh xD. Ask me again about those in a few seasons. At this moment, I’d say John/Mary, because I find the whole Cupid-made-them-do-it-but-their-endgame-is-still-together incredibly offputting.
favourite episode: arrrrgh this one is so difficult. The top candidates are 3x03 (Bela’s intro), 3x12 (Ruby’s GLORIOUS “I told you so” *-*) 4x09-10 (they kinda go together. Sexy Samruby flashbacks, Anna’s intro, Deanruby reluctant in-laws nonsense, Anna/Castiel(/Dean) shenanigans...), and 4x16 (gr10 Castiel and Anna/Castiel moments, perfect Samruby, Dean at his most entertaining...).
saddest death: Ruby’s is more frustrating than sad (she could’ve been such a good addition to later plots ugh. Not to mention, I’m still pissed Dean is the one who had the killshot. Ruby, Sam, and myself all deserved for the one who stabbed her to be Sam ¬¬. Hell, based on how they talked about it in 15x13, I’m clearly not the only one who feels this way lol).
favourite season: hmm... s4 has a lot of frustrating things but I did devour it eagerly, so xD. For now, s4. s3 is really close too, but I keep going back to how awful I felt after “Ghostfacers”, so.
least favourite season: s4 in a way too xDD. IDK, tbh I can’t pick a “least” fave, they all had that... greatness marinated in bigotry and hypocritical protagonist-centered morality aftertaste xDD
a character that everyone else in the fandom loves, but I hate: the hate part of my love-hate relationship with Dean goes here, I GUESS. And huh, saying “hate” would be a stretch because I did like his appearances, but I get the feeling the fandom’s hardon for Gabriel, of all the freaking angels, is going to annoy me at some point.
my ‘you’re a piece of trash, but you’re still a fave’ fave: Dean lol. And also Chuck aka God. Like, where else I’m going to get such a chaotic canonically bisexual, Big Bad Christian God that’s also a metaphor for writers xDD. And if I’m honest, most of my SPN faves/characters should go here. Who isn’t a piece of trash sometimes in this show, really.
my ‘beautiful cinnamon roll who deserves better than this’ fave: given the morality curve on this show, at this point BELA is the better fit lmfao. Jack will probably go here too.
my ‘this ship is wrong, nasty, and makes me want to cleanse my soul, but I still love it’ ship: if I feel no shame about Samruby, I don’t see how I’d feel it for anything else lol. I look forward to shipping Castiel and Lucifer, for one :P
my ‘they’re kind of cute, and I lowkey ship them, but I’m not too invested’ ship: hmm... Bobby/Rufus? The ex-married vibes they give off are A Lot, and I haven’t even seen them interact in a proper scene xDD. Out of all the ships I’m into they’re the only one that SO FAR could be said to be “lowkey”, everything else is “GIVE IT TO ME NOW” or “I don’t want to be into this, but I am. Dammit” xDD.
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