#but a lot of us are seeing our own experiences in those of indigenous and colonized peoples everywhere and fighting for what's right | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jewishvitya · 2 months

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hei. i enjoy your blogs, i hope you could clear something up for me., i just saw someone claim to be "zionist as in i believe jewish people have the right to self determination in their indigenous homeland",, ive actually seen the claim that jewish ppl are indigenous to israel and are somehow denied that identity as a form of anti semitism and erasure of jewish experience multiple times.. and it always confused me so much cuz like israel was set up as this nationalist project in 1948, before the region was a mess mostly under the rule of the ottomans, but the palestinian culture and ppl were always there. how can someone be indigenous to a region if they werent there before? is there any truth to the claim or is it just co-opting leftist language again?

its so evil how the state of israel could jist completely legitimize itself by co-opting jewish culture and pretending like being in support of it is a fundamental part of jewishness :(

Thank you!! I'm glad you do.

I can try, but I'm not sure how good I'll be at explaining this. Maybe someone else can add to this. If I repeat things I said before, I apologize.

That is a definition of zionism used by many zionists who lean politically to the left. I don't subscribe to these softer definitions of zionism because saying it's just "the right to Jewish self determination in our ancestral homeland" ignores that in practice over the last century the next words are "to the exclusion of others." I define zionism through its practical outcome - which is what we did to Palestinians.

Jewish people originate here. Our religious laws and practices (many of which are regularly disregarded by Israel and by settlers when they do things like destroying olive trees and water sources) are tied to this specific land. There are holidays and religious rituals that are either fundamentally changed or can't be practiced at all if we're anywhere else in the world. Culturally most branches of Judaism maintained this connection throughout our history. And we didn't leave willingly. An empire expelled us from the place that was our land. When the point of indigeniety comes up, this is why. You'll see arguments like - when does indigeniety expire? How many generations until you no longer have a claim to the ancestral homeland you were driven away from?

So this is the cultural context for Judaism. This is something that I also can't really ignore. I can't pretend I don't care about this land and the connection we always had to it.

That said, I still see this as using leftist terminology inappropriately.

To talk about Israel, a lot of us talk about colonialism, and specifically settler colonialism. I lived in the West Bank settlements so to me this really resonates. The argument I get at that point is that an indigenous group can't colonize their own land.

And this is why I'm saying it's a misuse of terminology. We're using that label to absolve ourselves. As if the word "indigenous" is a stamp of approval we get to apply to our actions while we repeat the violence of colonizing forces in history.

Ethnic cleansing, occupation, building settlements - and now also genocide. The tools we use resonate with indigenous people all over the world, because they suffered through similar kinds of oppression. Always with differences and different contexts, these things are never 1:1, but there's a reason indigenous groups around the world are in solidarity with Palestinians. I shared about a video from a Korean person talking about how colonialism by Japan broke the thread of their history - old buildings that had to be rebuilt instead of being preserved, historical cultural practices and art forms being lost or changed due to the loss of artisans. These are things Israel is doing now.

So to me, this is using the word "landback" and "liberation" for a violent takeover of land from an indigenous group. You mentioned the Ottomans - Palestine has been conquered over and over throughout history. Those regimes, sure, fighting them off can be liberatory, if the intent isn't to become the conquerors in their place. But there's nothing to liberate from Palestinians, because they're not colonizing anything. They belong in this land.

I'm really angry that so many of us try to deny the Palestinians their own connection. They have roots here, a long and rich history shaped by life in the land. While we destroy so much and say our claim is so strong we get to kill or drive them away for it.

#riki babbles

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ailani-reillata · 4 months

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Ailani’s Story and the Indigenous Experience

Since it’s Ailani’s second anniversary tomorrow, I really wanted to take some time to discuss some of the themes and ideas behind her story.

I have a lot of things I want to discuss, but in this post, I want to talk about Ailani’s story as seen through an Indigenous lens. Later, I want to discuss the very specific Kānaka Maoli themes in her story, but right now, I want to cover the overall theme of Indigenous identity and how it applies to the story I’m telling.

A lot of the issues/things I will be discussing in this post impact other communities as well, but as an Indigenous person discussing my Indigenous character, I’ll be mainly referring to these things through an Indigenous lens and perspective.

I’ve talked endlessly about how Ailani’s story is a love letter to grief and a story of mental health, but it’s also always been a cultural outlet for me. Every aspect of her life has multiple meanings and metaphors, but right now, I want to talk about my Indigenous perspective and how that impacted the story I wrote.

Ailani’s story begins before she is born. It begins on Mandalore, her Father’s homeworld. Shortly after her parents get married, the planet is thrown into Civil War due to Republic interference and clan infighting. Ailani’s Father and his clan are forcibly removed from Mandalore after the Republic and the Jedi Order assist the New Mandalorian clan and help install a new government. Her Father is then separated by the fragmented remains of his clan and moves to Naboo. His wife insists that he will have a better life there and have better opportunities. But he is alone and isolated. No one around speaks his language, no one eats the same kind of food or wears the same kind of clothes. He is entirely alone culturally. Until Ailani is born, he is the only Mandalorian for light years.

This story of forcible displacement, cultural isolation, and government interference shapes Ailani’s entire life, and this story is also very well known to many Indigenous communities. It’s a story I lived, and it’s a story my kūpuna lived. Many in kūpuna in my family were personally displaced by the fall of the Hawaiian Kingdom and the transition into statehood. People were removed from their homes, people were transported to other islands or even the mainland. The world was changed.

Ailani is born into a galaxy where her culture is all but lost to her family. The minerals and metals in Naboo aren’t the same, so her Father can’t practice his religion, which involves metalworking and craftsmanship. The plants and fruits aren’t the same, so he slowly forgets how to cook the meals he grew up on because he can’t find substitutes. Therefore, Ailani grows up not knowing much of her history and heritage because these things have been stolen from her Father, so he can’t pass them on to her. She speaks Mando’a in her youth, and she learned traditional hunting and gathering, but there is still a massive lack.

And even those things are later taken from her.

For Ailani is sent to live with the Jedi “for her own good.”

The Mother insists that she and The Father cannot provide for Ailani as she needs. The Mother insists that it’s time to move on. The Mother insists that times are changing. And Ailani is sent to live at a faraway school for her own good.

This is a story many of our kūpuna know. This is a story from my grandfather’s life. And this is a story he used to tell me. Like Ailani, my grandfather was sent away so he could learn other ways. His parents thought it was best for him to forget them. Like Ailani, my grandfather only got to see his parents once after he was sent away. Like Ailani, his parents died before he got the opportunity to really know them again.

The Jedi don’t explicitly discourage Ailani from pursuing cultural connection, but again, the isolation of her situation robs her of any opportunity to try. She doesn’t know any other Mandalorians. She doesn’t know anyone who speaks the same version of Mando’a that her Father did. She can read books and practice alone, but she misses out on so much because her culture is community-focused, and she is entirely alone.

And most importantly, she is a Jedi now.

And the Jedi are part of the reason her Father was removed from Mandalore in the first place. She feels like both victim and executioner. The harder she conforms to Jedi ways, the more guilty she feels about abandoning Mandalorian practices. Yet, at the same time, she feels cast out whenever she engages in Mandalorian practices, because no one else understands them. She is too Mandalorian to be Jedi and too Jedi to be Mandalorian.

This is also a story my grandfather told me. He spoke of the “modern world” and how desperately he wished to return to the old ways. He missed fishing and slow sunrises and waves full of sea turtles.

But my grandfather also told me that he needed to eat. And he felt that the price of food was forgetting the old ways and adopting the new ones. He said once that all modern things we know were bought with blood money. He told me to never forget where I was from. He made me promise.

Sometimes, I think this story is for him too.

#This is so long but it’s also so very important to me #My life and my existence and the existence of my people has shaped this story #I’ve had this idea for months and now just felt like the perfect time to discuss it #I also have another unfinished draft about the specific Hawaiian themes seen in her story with tourism impacts but I’ll finish that later #ailani réillata

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dungeonofthedragon · 11 days

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Ttrpg Recs: my bookshelf!

I don't have that many games in physical form. But inspired by the lovely Dael Kingsmill's recent video, I want to do a little post about the ones I do own.

Animal Adventures by Steamforged Games

Animal Adventures is a third party setting for 5th edition Dungeons and Dragons. I picked up Secrets of Gullet Cove on clearance, and it's full of fun adventure hooks for a younger audience than usual for 5E. However, a member of my dnd group wants to run this at some stage, so it has a wider appeal among fans of cute critter rpgs too.

It's fairly easy to incorporate ideas from this book into your home games. A guest in my Strixhaven campaign wanted to play a character who had been transformed into a cat. The cat stats from this book fit right in with the other characters, who were all created using official 5E materials.

Fate Accelerated by Evil Hat

The first rpg I ever purchased! It's simple, streamlined, and flexible enough to run in any setting you can imagine. We'd planned to play 'card games in space' at one stage (after watching too much yu-gi-oh), and the system works as well for that as it does for urban fantasy, pirates, or magic schools. You can access the rules of this game for free at the link in the heading.

The main issue I ran into with Fate is that it uses a specialised set of dice called Fudge dice- but as long as you have a device that can download a dice app, you're good to go!

Girl By Moonlight by Evil Hat

I backed this one on Kickstarter. It's not the easiest book to navigate but, gosh, it's just so beautiful and the game is a great time once you get the hang of it! I ended up ordering five copies, because a bunch of my friends wanted the game too and Expensive International Shipping is more manageable if you split it. Tragic magical girls from the creators of Thirsty Sword Lesbians? It is just as excellent as I'd hoped.

Just the other week we played At the Brink of the Abyss using the core book and relevant one-session playkit. Transcendence is a great mechanic- players get to describe their character's unique transformation and feel powerful with the addition of new abilities! Our Midnight Quill was running around invisible for half the game. Raven's mother was knocked out with a well-flung shoe. It was very fun and very silly.

Girl By Moonlight is a Forged in the Dark game. If you're familiar with Blades in the Dark, Brinkwood, Court of Blades, or my own simplified fitd game Voidwalkers, the system is easily picked up.

Lex Arcana by Quality Games

Lex Arcana is an interesting one. It has a fascinating premise: a Roman empire that never fell, in a low-magic setting. I had a lot of fun running this as a short adventure for my classics-buff brother's birthday last year. However, the group agreed that it would be difficult to play this one long term.

This has nothing to do with the rules system, which has an enjoyable amount of crunch for those who like their games that way, but enough abstraction that running it was not a complete nightmare for a more narratively inclined GM such as myself. Rather, it was difficult for us to get past the fact that so many of its adventure modules involve you preventing indigenous populations from breaking away from the empire, often casting their spiritual views in a negative light.

I had an idea for a campaign called 'Enemies of the Empire', which involves the party having to go up against it, but we'll see if it ever comes to fruition.

Tales of Xadia by Fandom Tabletop

I love the Cortex system. I love systems that use dice pools, and my first experience with that was the Tales of Xadia playtest. I couldn't afford the full version when it released, and so I was very excited when I received it for my birthday last year in glorious hardcover!

Tales of Xadia is set in the world of the Dragon Prince (even if you're not into ttrpgs, the book is excellent for additional lore nuggets. For a year or more it was our best resource for what earthblood elves might look like.) It's a world of high magic, mages and assassins and bold warriors, imperious dragons and reclusive elves. And it's totally classless- score one for the fans of classless systems!

#tales of xadia #cortex rpg #girl by moonlight #forged in the dark #animal adventures #dungeons and dragons #lex arcana #fate rpg #fate accelerated

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vulturevanity · 1 year

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Like, it was bad, y'all

I've been revisiting FiM because a friend decided to check it out (after she realized it was a significant part of my personality and wanted in on it), and by god, did they do a racism. And then another one. And then another one. And then-- you get the idea.

And I'm not talking about the weird ways in which they tackled the subject of racism itself, most notably on the later seasons. Setting aside awkward lessons in "be nice to those who look and act different from you", gen 4 is loaded with racist caricatures, cultural appropriation, tone-deaf storylines of conflict between natives and colonizers and a heap of other elements that, later on, the writers seemed to realize were, hmm!, not so great!, and therefore quietly phased out of the show without ever addressing them in a sensible way. Things that go as far back as episode 5.

It's late and I don't have the brain power to tackle all of these right now but I just want to list some of the things I'm deeply umcomfortable with in the show that I can recall right now:

Zecora as a character AND as the only zebra we see in the show for all of 9 seasons. Simultaneously the Token Black side character, the Magical N**** stereotype and the fact that she's described in the show as an "exotic" outsider. (You know, later on they had an Egyptian-coded character appear in the show. She was a pony. I never got why they didn't use that opportunity to fix The Zecora Problem)

The Buffalo episode. Speciically the fact that settlers took their sacred land and they were told to just "learn to share" and it was ok because the settlers gave them pies about it

That scene where Pinkie Pie dresses as a stereotype of Rroma people (which spawned a very popular arc in a parody that had her saying and singing the G-slur in multiple songs.)

The imperialism in The Crystal Empire (not king Sombra, the fact that after they defeated them, rather than letting a Crystal Pony rule the empire, they put Cadence, who is from Equestria, on the throne)

After deposing Chrysalis, the one changeling put in charge was the one the ponies had a good relation with (something that happens with startling frequency between the US and cartain parts of the Middle East)

The uncomfortable power dynamics between the pony races (especially the Hearthswarming Eve backstory)

The W*NDIGOS

And that's just off the top of my head. That's just what I can remember at 1 am while frantically typing in the dark.

The fandom's white supremacy problem suddenly isn't all that surprising when you realize how BAD things were in the show. It's not like it was doing much against that kind of bigotry.

And for the record, I'm not trying to "cancel" FiM. I still love this show with all my heart; it's really important to me, and it's still a good show that, in a way, kick-started the 2010s cartoon renaissance. We owe a lot to it. But that's exactly why I'm so upset by it's failings as a show that defined itself by its morals on friendship and standing together against hadship. To see the glaring blind spots on a show created by a white woman, with a writing room full of mostly white people, who despite having good intentions really did not know what they were doing sometimes. It hurts me as a fan of colour, and it hurts black and indigenous fans most of all but not exclusively.

Hopefully, now speaking a as someone aiming to be in the animation industry, we can use this as a learning experience, so we grow to be more critical of our own work, and maybe our own shortcomings won't be offensive or hurtful towards any demographic we may want to represent.

#mlp #mlp:fim #my little pony #my little pony: friendship is magic #mlp gen 4 #racism

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xxlovelynovaxx · 8 months

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the person who coined "kinetic" (autistic voices: cheshire cat) is antiblack & pro-cop and shouts down other people with adhd & the auDHD community who do not want to call themselves "kinetic." /not mad /info

av/cheshire cat is notorious for sending harassment brigades after people and has even sent harassment after one of our mixed black & indigenous mutuals on x/twitter.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/FqNcCjpXwAEzspq?format=jpg&name=large

https://twitter.com/IsabellaScar2/status/1630939933060808709

"kinetic" is also inaccurate to a lot of people's experiences and so is "amism." not all of us are "in movement" and it sounds just as bad as reducing us to just being hyperactive.

please consider not boosting this type of language. /not mad /genuine

In the nicest way possible, I don't give a shit about who coined a term if the term itself isn't harmful. Eighty percent of the official names of my disorders, disabilities, and neurodivergencies were coined by violent ableists who actively harmed their patients and clients.

I also did not see "kinetic" mentioned in the post at all. I saw "movement", but that's a word, not a term at all.

I'm not reducing anyone's experiences by boosting a term that fits me for other people who like it to use. With such a wide spectrum like that of ADHD, quite honestly, it's unlikely to find an umbrella term that will fit everyone. Not everyone is "in movement". Not everyone is "hyperactive". VERY FEW people are "attention deficit", because one of the primary features of ADHD is an inability to DIRECT our very INTENSE attention. A "deficit" only appears in the sense of not being able to find a subject of interest with a low executive functioning barrier and high dopamine return sometimes.

And at the end of the day, a demedicalized term that doesn't fit everybody but recognizes our experiences as not inherently* disordered is still a better term than something that pathologizes a misinformed malicious misunderstanding of what our neurotype actually is. And it can be simply a stepping stone that cedes to a better umbrella term if one is found (at which point it can even be retained as a sublabel).

*My own amism is disordered. I'm not saying it can't ever be, just that it isn't inherently so.

So no, I will not consider not boosting language that some people find helpful, unrelated to a similar neutral term coined by a bigoted creator, just because it doesn't fit everyone. I'm answering you directly rather than just blocking in the hopes that you're actually truly saying this in good faith, but I would advise that if you want to argue further with me to just block me instead as I won't change my mind.

I'd also advise you to seriously think about your reasoning behind never using a label that someone harmful came up with. Clearly, since you're having to tell people who coined "kinetic", the coiner is receiving neither attention/a platform nor money to further their bigoted goals from the vast majority of people who use the term, and CERTAINLY not from people who use an unrelated term that happens to have a similar meaning. What harm does a term like that do, other than not being a perfect fit for every person on the planet that has ADHD?

This isn't a JK/R situation. The term isn't helping them subjugate marginalized people. Sure, they themselves should absolutely be termed on their social media and should be ignored by the larger community in general, except perhaps by people well-versed in deradicalization and rehabilitative justice tactics.

You seem to mean well, but what you're saying is neither effective at actually fighting the real harm that person has done, nor addressing any inherent harm in the term I reblogged. I don't think you've done anything wrong, I just hope that you'll consider that language like this is not itself inherently harmful and that policing usage of it by those who are marginalized or allies (or both) based on the coiner being a piece of shit is not itself useful and even potentially harmful.

#yes it is possible that this person is just concern trolling but I'm trying to be better about not believing the worst of people #it's equally likely that they're just neurodivergent with strongly held opinions and are doing their best to be a good person #I'd rather believe it's the second one

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laserlesbians · 6 days

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scarlet, pomegranate, jam, and poppy for both azel and janna. also kissing u sloppy.

Ok let's see what I can do here - I'm gonna organize this first by color, then by character. Also EEEEEEE I GET TO TALK ABOUT MY GIRLS!!!!!! Scarlet: How do they grieve? Azel: Azel is typically very private and restrained in her grief. She hasn't had many occasions on which she needed to deal with major griefs in her life, and given her position at the FIO it feels unsafe to express anything like that now, to anyone other than maybe one person... She processes it, eventually, but only as well or as completely as someone can when keeping it exclusively inside their own head. Which is to say, not very. Janna: Badly. The story of how Janna grieves is arguably what sets up the entire story of Bitter Tide. Janna grieves privately, but in public. She drinks, she fights, she works herself (and her targets) to death, she tries to avoid the feelings as much as she can and find anything else to fill that void inside of her. Pomegranate: Which myth would they relate to most? Azel: I think she'd find the Odyssey uncomfortably familiar. A straightforward, if unpleasant and dangerous, journey turning into a long and traumatic debacle taking you far, far from home, from anywhere you ever meant to go, and returning you home eventually changed in ways you cannot begin to understand. Janna: Oh, this one is too easy. Orpheus. I'm pretty sure that ever since she killed Azel, she's been looking over her shoulder in more ways than one, and regretting it every single time. She just couldn't stop herself... Jam: Can they cook? Azel: Yes! She's actually pretty good - this is something that comes up in act 2 of Bitter Tide, albeit briefly. She's used to the particular constraints that come of living on a fairly recently terraformed world, where water especially is a limited resource, so meat is rare and crops that don't require a lot of water are abundant. She took to the idiosyncrasies of Spacer cooking pretty well, though, during her time on Sivas! Janna: Yes, but she's not great. It's not quite bachelor food, but it's nothing that she'd want to serve a guest. Survival cooking, in a place where a lot of people buy the majority of their food prepared from vendors on their local concourse. Think medieval European urban or modern Chinese street food - often the primary meals for the working class, cheap, nutritious, tasty, and fast. Poppy: Do they believe in a god? Azel: Not really. There's a dozen sizable religions scattered across Anqa Group space, many of which would be recognizable to our current sensibilities - Islam has survived the last 1400 years, there's no reason it wouldn't survive the next 1400! Besides, Bitter Tide is only like 500-1000 years out or so. But, there's also plenty of agnostics and atheists in plenty of places. Azel is one of those, it's just never really been relevant to her. Janna: Kind of. Sivas and the rest of the system share an indigenous majority religion that I have thus far declined to give a name to. It pulls from some old Earth religions, neighboring systems' faiths, and some unique elements to the system. There's a pantheon of deities I haven't bothered to hash out yet - just no need so far - and also the planets themselves are seen as divine entities with their own deity-like representations. Stations and large ships have their own tutelary deities, and smaller ships or shuttles might have a protective spirit of the void that they call on during a rough passage. Janna herself isn't particularly religious, but Sivas is, if not a religious hegemony per se, at least a place where faith forms one of the dominant frameworks within which citizens theorize about their own experiences. When Janna feels bad, she's much more likely to go to a priest than a counselor. So yes, she believes passively in the same gods as almost everyone else in her system, but she doesn't have a particularly strong personal practice of that faith. OC ASK GAME - RED

#bitter tide

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belamuse · 1 month

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Lately, the energy has been heavy. On the wheel of the natural year, Imbolc marks the midway point between the Longest Night and the Spring Equinox (when day and night are exactly equal). It’s usually the time we start feeling a little more upbeat and active for the first time in a new calendar year, although translated from Old Irish it means ‘in the belly’. Because it isn’t until Ostara - the Spring Equinox around 6 to 8 weeks later - that we experience our full awakening into the new year. And this year, it has felt like this last violent stretch of winter has been crushing us with wave after wave, keeping us from making it to the surface to get a full breath of air.

I used to never talk about energies like this, let alone publicly, for fear of being called weird or crazy. But if you’ve been following me, you’ll know that such blocks don’t have power over me any longer. This took quite a lot of shadow work, deconstruction, inner child healing, and most of all, decolonization work - in which I am a for-ever student of Black and Indigenous women. It also took an immense amount of shedding.

Shedding expectations.

Shedding false personas.

Shedding false friendships.

Shedding excess.

Shedding entitlement.

Shedding judgment.

Shedding my inner oppressor.

Shedding egoic goals.

Shedding actual things.

Just two and a half years ago, I was still in the middle of this process. Or maybe just at the beginning. Or maybe both. "It's so inauthentic" said a new acquaintance about my new homepage - with which I wanted to position myself as a spiritual teacher & coach - as us white women all did during the pandemic. My immediate thought was "You've known me for all of a month, how can you possibly know what's authentic to me?!" I got really angry (I'm a Manifestormy not-self-theme is rage) but still took her criticism. She went on, "You're too smiley. Why do you smile so much if you want to talk about the darkness in our psyches?" I was just learning to overcome people pleasing and perfectionism, and going through several major life changes, and waking up to how this fucked up world of capitalism was exploiting me, so overwhelmed was my default state already. The added anger just threw me for a loop. I started questioning my goals, my plans, everything.

Just two and a half years ago, I was still in the middle of this process. Or maybe just at the beginning. Or maybe both. "It's so inauthentic" said a new acquaintance about my new homepage - with which I wanted to position myself as a spiritual teacher & coach - as us white women all did during the pandemic. My immediate thought was "You've known me for all of a month, how can you possibly know what's authentic to me?!" I got really angry (I'm a Manifestor - my not-self-theme is rage) but still took her criticism. She went on, "You're too smiley. Why do you smile so much if you want to talk about the darkness in our psyches?" I was just learning to overcome people pleasing and perfectionism, and going through several major life changes, and waking up to how this fucked up world of capitalism was exploiting me, so overwhelmed was my default state already. The added anger just threw me for a loop. I started questioning my goals, my plans, everything.

You see, I was in a brand-new relationship - learning to navigate the conscious union of two independent, strong-willed, Pluto-dominant Manifestors is not easy. We had just moved in together, he leaving his separate apartments and previous life in the city behind for a new small-town life with a new puppy in a rural, quite protestant part of the country. We wanted to be closer to his family and be able to visit his 90 year old grandmother. On top of that as if all of those changes aren't rough enough yet - we didn't know anyone in this town, and we weren't going to meet anyone at work either, because we had decided to start our own thing together: bootstrapping a company and developing a menstrual health app, among other projects. And all of this in the middle of a global pandemic with multiple active restrictions.

We had met at our previous city job. Nothing fancy, but a classic online brand with urgency dripping from every email, way too few employees for the mountain of ambitious projects in the backlog, exploitation evident in their hush-hush attitudes towards salary negotiations, and blatant misogyny and anger management issues in every single meeting. It was very millennial, with after-hour-beers and a free in-house bar. And also, it was a living hell of constant hyper vigilance around the all-male team of bosses paired with nonstop stress. In one infamous 1-on-1 meeting between my partner (a software engineer and architect) and our CEO, he was asked what he really wanted to do with his career. To this he replied "Grow trees and walk my dog." This sparked our infuriated CEO to yell, "Don't be cynical! I'm serious." So was my partner. He was done with the conversation at that point, however, which really threw our CEO over the edge. The meeting was over promptly.

I can't begin to describe the mix of sensations I was experiencing during the process of completely overthrowing our entire lives. Fear, most of all. Excitement. Shame at our audacity to believe that we could do it. Relief. Gratitude for the ability to make such changes. Stressed at the money situation regardless. Depressed to be leaving my frankly amazing life and friends. Anxious. Lonely. Overwhelmed. Skeptical. Selfish. Optimistic. You get the picture... It's not much different from how people describe their "spiritual awakenings" and in a way, it was a major initiation. One that is by no means done yet, but one that taught us how to jump our shadows-referencing a German proverb that quite intrigues me.

Almost three years later, I can say it was the best decision we could have made and I am so supremely optimistic about where we're headed. Not because everything's a full success in terms of its capitalist definition yet, or because it was the easiest thing we ever did. But because it put us on a path of intense ego deaths, shadow integration, and ultimately, authenticity.

Stripping away our limiting beliefs around what's possible in this life, defying cultural norms of how it's always been done and how everyone else is doing it, questioning everything we thought we needed and discovering we need way less, building a new (way of) life in which the goal is true freedom from power structures and time constraints...

In short, we discovered what #maincharacterenergy means: Self responsibility. Becoming the main character in your own life is about authorship and authority. Well, and authenticity.

Gabor Maté says the worst aspect of trauma is the disconnection from our Selves. Our core human needs are attachment and authenticity. He adds, "Your true Self never went away. Nobody's damaged goods. Nobody's broken."

So, what is authenticity?

Modern psychologists generally still debate whether "people actually possess an innate self and need to uncover it, or whether the true self is flexible and determined by the choices people make throughout their lives." (Psychology Today) They also don't seem to agree on a definition of authenticity, yet although this framework has been proposed:

1. Self-awareness: Knowledge of and trust in one's own motives, emotions, preferences, and abilities.

2. Unbiased processing: Clarity in evaluating your strengths and your weaknesses without denial or blame.

3. Behavior: Acting in ways congruent with your own values and needs, even at the risk of criticism or rejection.

4. Relational orientation: Close relationships, which inherently require openness and honesty.

This seems to assume that there is an objective measure of authenticity - and is probably what my acquaintance was referring to when she gave me feedback about my website. I'll admit, it's a little too complicated and clinical for my taste.

As if authenticity was a judgment that another could make about you. As if they had a certain image of a persona that you've presented to them for long enough which now somehow grants them permission to criticize you.

What if authenticity wasn't a yardstick anyone gets to beat me with (including myself)?

What if instead, authenticity became a practice?

A daily a constant practice of answering the question "What's true for me right now?".

And what if we dared to meet each other in this mentality, too? "Oh, this is true for you right now?! How fascinating. Tell me more."

Believe each other.

Believe your Self.

True intelligence is knowing where you are and where you are going.

Read that again.

Both as humans and as humanity, we have to constantly look harder and deconstruct more to really see where we are. We (in the West) have been lied to about where we are for a long fucking time.

Then, we have to find our actual soul path (guess what, it's not a career) to know where we're going.

This is what I call authenticity.

Truth is the only way.

Authenticity might be the hardest thing we can practice. And it is merely the first step towards a better life, a liberated world, true peace. Because once we've found our authenticity, we can work on authority (over ourselves) and authorship (of our new story), as well.

'In the belly' as in gestation, yes, but also as in 'we have stuffed ourselves too full of privilege' and now it's time for a purge. So maybe, this Lent - if you observe - we should focus our energy on shedding excess: patriarchy's 'power over and against', capitalism's 'hustle and grind', colonialism's 'us versus them'....

How do we author new worlds?

By embodying what we wish to see in these worlds.

How do we embody that?

By reshaping our conditioning and pulling our newly learned information down into our bodies. By living in alignment with our authentic Self - our essence - our soul. That's the only thing we have any authority over, being in that kind of alignment. "My higher Self" is not a millionaire version of myself - my higher Self is my most human Self. My most alive Self. My most loving Self.

That means I must author new worlds that are free for all in which all are free.

My spiritual teacher recently said "Let your essence take the wheel, shove your personality into the passenger's seat." And damn, my essence wants a liberated humanity and a mass reckoning with healing. Just as she wants freedom and healing for herself. As within, so without.

And then there's this Rumi quote that seems to have become my life's motto:

"forget safety. live where you fear to live. destroy your reputation. be notorious."

In this tiny protestant town, where no one truly knows me, but everyone has an opinion about me, I have succeeded at being notorious. And I have never felt more authentic in my life. And, sidenote, my partner grows trees and makes bonsai.

Stay tuned for part 2, in which I'm inviting you to create your own practice of authenticity.

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humanitiesgonedigital · 1 month

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#3: AI Considerations

As we advance in our digital world, the emergence of Artificial Intelligence (AI) has become quite prevalent in today’s society. As with everything that becomes more and more mainstream in today’s society, discussion and controversy becomes apparent. I like to think I’m fairly aware of discussions around AI use, I haven’t necessarily used AI other than in a class or two in college. However, as a writing consultant at my campus’s writing center, I’ve encountered essays that have been completely written using AI assistance. It’s fairly easy to point out AI writing (especially when a student forgets to omit the source of AI assistance at the bottom of the paper, indicating that they haven’t read over the essay for errors/edits) because of most AI programs’ use of Standard English, fluff words that don’t tie any coherent ideas together, and the passive sentences that are typical of writing services that follow the most basic grammatical structures and rules to make it sound like something is being said; there is hardly any real substance to what is being displayed when it comes to AI-generated writing, in my experience of seeing papers that have used AI.

The most common AI program I’ve heard of is ChatGPT, and I even have a friend that uses it quite often for fun. It seems to provide lots of interesting writing depending on the question being asked, and gives a lot of ideas to how sentences can be structured, or how words can be utilized, or even how diverse words can typically be. In that sense, I think AI can be super helpful with generating ideas that one can build off of. The idea of a program being able to give examples of templates and structure is enticing, and I can even see AI programs providing assistance for those words that are on the tip of your tongue but you just can’t quite get ahold of. However, AI still follows heavy bias, and in a perfect world where AI wouldn’t follow some sort of bias (which it never will, if we’re being honest, because bias is inherent), then AI would still be lacking in the possibilities outside of what already exists unless it’s programmed to come up with completely unfamiliar intelligence — and in that case, what would happen then?

If AI is to become more practical, I’d suggest that it only be used to generate ideas rather than whole concepts, projects, or transformative works. It can prompt one’s own mind, but it would be up to the user on how to use it, and people often don’t know how to use information presented to them entirely. If it’s to become practical for anyone, it must take into account different and diverse voices, not just majority groups and what they decide to put online for AI to access. Michelle Lee Brown, Hēmi Whaanga, and Jason Edward Lewis bring up great points in “Relation-Oriented AI” where indigenous groups lack a voice in the creation and utilization of AI.[1] If we are to advance with AI, it should be with as many voices and perspectives as possible: those who don’t use digital resources as often or at all; those who consum digital content in non-uniform ways; those who’s opinion on AI or otherwise don’t voice their interjections on the internet; those in minority groups; those who lack digital resources. This is to say, though digital content is a large part of the world today, it is not used equally by everyone, nor is it equitable to all people and how it is used, but if it’s to be this new innovative resource, then it should be a resource to whomever it becomes available to.

[1] Michelle Lee Brown, Hēmi Whaanga, and Jason Edward Lewis, "Relation-Oriented AI: Why Indigenous Protocols Matter for the Digital Humanities," Debates in the Digital Humanities, ch. 4.

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#digital humanities #academia #artificial intelligence #blogging

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sufferbuddies · 3 months

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Not my post or comments -

Sometimes I sit down and I remember all the people I told my weaknesses too. Forces me to remember how each and every one of them used those secret weaknesses against me, because they were pisst off. Yes karma is real. You could call it God. Or the universe. All the same shit. Christians praise Jesus. Muslims praise Allah. Natives and their holy spirit. Buddhist and enlightenment. It is all the same shit.

3,6,9. What the fuck?

I have developed a great deal of trust issues due to a lot of these people, betraying me. It makes it hard to want to tell anyone anything. Then I just think back to that movie 8 mile. When Eminem says " what you gonna tell these people bout me now?" And I start writing.

If I tell everyone my wrongs. They could hate me. If they knew I was a liar, a thief, an aggressor, once upon a time. A drunk, an addict, and a cheat. If they knew i was a sex addict, or just how far i would go into the rabbit hole to get my way. If they knew how much money I owed.

Maybe they won't though. Maybe I can show them a different perspective. The one people don't want to see because they are to busy hiding behind their two-way mirror of judgement.

I know why I am alone.

Nobody wants me, nobody can handle me.

All because I partied so fucking hard...not my fault though, been like that ever since I was a baby. Came out of my mom, slapping titties and motor boaten.

I am a master at self-sabotage, but why? Sometimes people sabotage themselves through ideas, and actions. The universe won't let you fail. You decide when you fail. Sometimes you have to be alone to see all the good right in front of you. Detaching from others is a way to see God in you from God's eyes. Then you can see God in others eyes. Now replace God with universe. Or Allah. Or Jesus. Or Chuck Norris. Or Ra. Or Yourself.

Now, if you will excuse me I have got to figure out where the number 5 even came from.

Comment

I directly relate to the betrayal and trust being used exclusively to harm me.

I also directly understand the isolation.

I think it is forced on a person by the abuse of trust. First this is tiresome and lonesome, and after incredible journeys of will and faith the isolation is found to be the badge of great honor, and thereafter it will be reflected on as a blessing that was misunderstood during much of the painful experience of it.

The goodwill a person shows will generally be a method by which you are tested spiritually and ethically.

You can start to anticipate the "punishment" you face for being genuinely interested in others well being.

That is when the universe is measuring your degree of selfishness behind the acts of goodwill.

As for some, seeming acts of goodwill are used only for the feeding of their own ego. The glorification of self is a dangerous side effect of false goodwill.

Therefore we must illustrate our sacrifice we endure correspondent to the generosity we have for others, by making personal concessions of comfort and excess.

We find after arduous investment of selfless displays of true good intention, that we are rewarded with deeper aspects of the inherent spiritual growth that surpasses and transcends the short term physical gratification that comes from the attainment of pleasure.

To suffer is a blessing. It will be the metric of true growth that will result for us.

5 came from the number of digits on our limbs. The Mayan numeric system was superior to our own, the base 10. The Mayans had developed the integers they base their understanding of numerics on, by looking at the humans body and seeing the same structure in al things. 5 is fundamental and the human number.

We are referred to as the 5 finger beings by certain American indigenous cultures which are some of the oldest known traditions.

I don't know, but I get a feeling that we are on the right path when we are on the right path.

#suffering #path #kundalini #answers #numbers

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interculturalchaos · 5 months

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Worldview in Mexico

We have previously discussed rather general information about Mexico, detailing the culture around gender expectations in urban and rural areas. While these social norms can tell us a lot about the country, understanding the worldview of most Mexicans can only add to a better understanding of their culture. Worldview refers to how people comprehend their purpose and place in this world and how they interpret reality. The dominant worldview in Mexico is religious in nature with most of the population practicing Christianity. In fact, according to the 2020 Mexican government census, about 78% of the population identifies as Roman Catholic (Government Reports). This means that the worldview is homogeneous as being Catholic or Christian in general is significantly shared by citizens in this country.

Catholics believe in one God who is the Holy Trinity composed of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. They attend mass every Sunday and receive the Eucharist which is the living Body of Christ. Catholics value mercy, love, piety, service, hope, and forgiveness of sins. Although the same religion with the same beliefs, Catholicism is the United States is much different from Catholicism in Mexico. Our textbook discusses how, in the U.S., spiritual individuality and finding your own peace of mind is stressed more in this individualistic society. In collectivistic Mexico, community and family are at the core of religious practices. Perhaps the biggest difference in Mexican Catholics is their devotion to the Virgin of Guadalupe. There have been many spiritual apparitions but perhaps the most popular one is the legend of Juan Diego seeing Our Lady of Guadalupe resulting in an image that has since been said to have performed miracles (Mexican Religion). Over the years, the Virgin of Guadalupe has taken on a Native American identity and given natives a personal stake in this once foreign religion. The Virgin’s legacy is now deeply engrained in Mexican culture and festivals.

With so many practicing Catholics, one might assume that Mexico experiences little religious conflicts and in doing so you would be incorrect (as most generalizations are!). Mexico’s constitution gives every citizen the right to religious freedom and to practice acts of worship. However, local authorities and state officials are hesitant to enforce this law as they exercise their biases. Many citizens suffer the impunity of others if they do not participate in religious activities held by the majority of that area. Most of the racial discrimination targets indigenous communities where religious uniformity is encouraged. A hypothetical example of this- although similar cases have been recorded- is someone with traditionally indigenous beliefs living in a Catholic-majority area and refusing to celebrate with them resulting in illegal fines, threats, displacement, or even cutting off their power and water (CSW Report). There are even cases where children are not allowed to attend school if their family practices a different religion. There is absolutely conflict between those who adhere to the dominant worldview and others in the culture who have opposing beliefs as religious minorities are pressured to conform very often. Many Mexicans fail to distinguish between religious and cultural celebrations and reject the idea that someone from Mexico would not want to participate in them. In fact, on average, “56.6% of Mexican adults agree only a little or not at all that people should be able to practice ‘non-Mexican’ traditions or customs” (CSW Report). Sadly, these beliefs bleed into politics, education systems, and other parts of society and have negative social and emotional impacts on minorities.

Religious violence and discrimination should be understood in its cultural context to understand it but not to excuse it. All of this information contributes to our understanding of the worldviews of people in Mexico. The more we learn and discover will only enrich our experiences and interactions with Mexicans. Personally, I am finding that America and Mexico are a lot more similar than I previously thought. I hope you’ll stick with me as we continue to grow in knowledge of this country!

#mexico #worldview #catholic #religion

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tru-design-leader · 6 months

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Visual Diary 9-b

Breaking Cultural Parameters in Design

Core shared values and ideals are what is the foundation on which different cultures stand. Those standards, and behaviors of groups indigenous to different parts of the world, or even more local, different quadrants of your city, are what fuse a group of people's identities with one another. Though those parameters should be honored for the shaping of our diverse culture, we sometimes break those parameters when trying to create a cross-cultural design or a fusion of more than one culture to bridge gaps of understanding and existence on a large scale. One reason designers may break cultural parameters is when they want to introduce or combine cultures to create a new product. You see this a lot in the gastronomy industry.

"Fusion Gastronomy is a relatively modern term and used properly it describes the thoughtful combination of often widely differing ethnic or regional ingredients, styles, or techniques to craft new interpretations or even invent wholly new dishes." ~Exquisit Tastes Magazine

Food and menu designers experiment with ingredients from various regions of the world to great culinary relationships between cultures. Some cultures, at least the elders of the cultures, may choose to not stray from the traditional preparation of food dishes. This is a way to ensure the history of the culture never fades. What I have found interesting is that many chefs, of any particular ethnic and geographic culture, often break culinary cultural parameters to create new dishes or categories of cuisine and as they become more experienced chefs, they reach back into their own culture for guidance and inspiration. This pathway, many times, leads to a new appreciation and exploration of one's own culture. Designers in other fields tend to follow that same pathway of cross-cultural design then focusing on a deeper level of understanding of the parameters of their own cultures and why those parameters exist. Overall, I love that rules are put in place for cultural whys and designers have opportunities to expand (or break) the parameters to create something new and potentially create new parameters. To me, the expansion of cultural parameters through the generations deepens how fully you can share what's important to a group of people, environment, or geographic region.

#design storytelling #design leadership #human centered design #expanding design parameters #design parameters #cultural design

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jmenvs3000f23 · 7 months

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Science is like a bestie that fills you in on all the gossip; You don't neeeed the drama, but it sure is hard to stop once you've started 🌱🌳(U5)

With this week’s topic being nature interpretation through science, I couuuuuuld talk about the pros and cons and try to discuss this from an unbiased perspective, but that would be doing an extreme disservice to my passion which has made me the person I am today. (me 💏 science)

But! I will start off by saying it’s obvious we don’t need science to describe or navigate the wonders found throughout the natural world and any inconsideration or disapproval of traditional knowledge is arrogant and silly. For example, the first people to travel to islands like Samoa, Tonga, or Hawaii doing so with only the stars and patterns of the wind and sea. Many years later we now know that the ocean floors’ topography influences wave patterns, but one can assume with them living and breathing that ocean they knew that long before science did; feeling the ocean and eventually coming to know it, using their lived experiences in ways we likely can’t even fathom. While of course this is an extreme case, one didn’t need to take part in one of the most triumphant feats in human history to recognize the patterns in the nature around them and make them useful. Another example of this would be the many years spent by various indigenous people around the world, observing the diets of sick animals, taking part in it, healing, and discovering what science would now describe as “medicinal plants.”

Now here’s where I think a lot of science-in-natures importance comes from: in Canada, like in many developed countries, we aren't living as immersed in the natural world as people once did. We’re spending more time surrounded by 4 walls than green, and we’re distanced from the land and animals that were once the teachers shaping our knowledge. As a result, I think we’re missing out on a lot of the intricate details, the interconnectedness, and the hidden stories we would have been exposed to and would have understood. While human advancement is jolly good and swell and all that I will be honest with you…..I have wanted to live in the jungle or something of the sort since I was like 5. I think there is immense importance in growing up alongside the natural world (not necessarily the jungle, I just have a dream ok ) with many lessons to be learned through experience but when that’s not possible, science can be a close replacement.

Having a home for shelter and knowing grocery stores were a thing, before science I would’ve just appreciated a tree for its aesthetics, its fragrance, the shade it provides or the good-tasting fruit it bears but with science? I see it as a mother, nurturing animals in its branches, and countless more microogranisms in its roots. It’s a producer of oxygen and a vital carbon storer mitigating climate change. It heals the soil and holds it in place, and it can even make energy with just the suns light. Sure I’d see the squirrels and birds making nests in the trees throughout my life and make that shelter connection on my own, but the rest of those things would probably remain a mystery to me if someone didn’t make it a point of adding natural history to school education (and that is crazy!!!!!!!)

#i love u science #nature interpretation #envs 3000 #nature #lets go science lets go *clap clap*

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outletmilk-blog · 1 year

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Why Some Forms of Knowledge are Privileged

One of my biggest and most freeing learnings this year has been that we think we 'know' and is 'truth' is actually just shared agreement amongst most of us. It's not stable, it's going to change - and a lot of the things we take as 'truth' is actually just privileged in this time and space. In fact it's changing now and will continue to do so for ever and eternity.

Okay, yeah...what? Think about it this way. Gravity was not a thing for humans 300-years ago. In fact, earth didn't move at all - it was flat and stationary (some of us still believe this.) What did move was the universe around us, and those twinkly things up there? They were bible verses or something. Regardless, God put them there. But until Galileo and Newton's apple fell off this tree, this was reality. Earth didn't move and stars and planets were God's realm - and if you said otherwise you'd be laughed at or whatever else they did to punish people in the 1600s.

I guess what I'm trying to illustrate is that we really don't know shit. We're constantly learning new things which inform how we construct and understand our own reality. Unfortunately somewhere along this path this meant that 'science' which has always conveyed itself as being the key to ultimate truth, became the dominant form of knowledge in Aotearoa and many other cultures.

Don't get me wrong, science has a lot of value - it's created vaccines that's saved millions and meant that psychological treatment has evolved from drilling holes into people's skulls (I wish I was joking.) Unfortunately though, this idea of science prevailing as the one ultimate form of knowledge has come at the cost of alternative forms of knowledge. Science exists in black and white. You test a hypotheses, it's true or false. So if science is the truth then every other form of knowledge that is not based on the same principles is "false."

It's also not a coincidence that science in the traditional sense is a Western concept. What comes to be regarded as truth in society can be seen as what the majority or dominant group believes and agrees upon. We see this in almost every colonised country with indigenous knowledge constructed as primitive or incorrect through systematic devaluing by settlers (that's another story, but look at how Māori have been portrayed in history books throughout time.)

People will often dismiss these alternative forms of knowing as not being 'evidence based' or not having the 'facts to back it up.' But even this conceptualisation shows that we have internalised knowledge as only being able to be proved by science. Aboriginal's used the Kakadu plum as a successful form of oral medicine for hundreds of years, not because they had tested it for it's high vitamin C content in a lab but because from the Aboriginal world-view bush-fruit symbolised health and vitality. Not only that but this fruit, and every other living thing in the world is "family" and has a place and role.

Similarly a Māori world-view has it's own laws of tapu. Hearing voices in Pakeha culture is seen as a disorder, but throughout Māori history hearing voices can be a normal part of the human experience. With acknowledgement of the close link between the physical and spirit world, these voices are often conceptualised as the voices of spirits or ancestors. Again, a Western knowledge base has similarly found that 3-5% of people hear voices. That's a lot higher than the diagnosed rate of schizophrenia or psychosis though (1%.) So can you hear voices and have them not be distressing? cross-culturally it appears so. But if we assume all voice hearing is a sign of illness, is that creating disorder where there is none?

While I'm not asking you to join the next flat-earthers meet-up, what I am asking you to do is consider why you may think what you personally believe is true. Some of us might believe aliens aren't real, but if those big-ass green motherfuckers turned up on your door-step your opinion might be changed. Knowledge is fluid and changing. Some people due to religion, culture or even damn interest may operate from a different knowledge base from you.

As usual it comes back to acknowledgement and respect. But it's important to be aware that simply because you have internalised one form of Western knowledge, this does not give you the right to devalue others.

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avatarwarriordreamwalkers · 1 year

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We all don’t have to look far to see in the news, humanity is a very violent species. The 1st outlet of violence is on the outside, internally directed outwards with no bulwark stopping its expression. We get war, mass shootings, Suicide bombings, the list goes on and on.

But the 2nd outlet of violence has the opportunity to be redemptive and transformative. It is internally directed outwards on the page or canvas as art. It allows the creator to process their demons in a dimension of the imagination where they have complete control, and thus can prevail, using their expression in films, theater, visual art, music and even sharing their internal battle through books.

And often times these “warrior dream-walkers” come out of their internal journey transformed, no longer a puppet of the violent thoughts that once dominated their mind. One might even say they have come closer to an Avatar consciousness, piloting their own body on a heroes journey, the way we might control an Avatar in a video game, no longer dominated by fear, but liberated by an experience where we connect to our higher self that is consciousness itself. I see filmmakers as warrior dream-walkers, facilitating an Avatar consciousness, helping others face the same demons they did, and potentially rise from them triumphant as a new human. This is the hope I see in the arts. 🎭

Sure, Avatar the film is violent, and there are a lot of films that are even worse! But this is the case with art throughout all of human history. Even the moral guidebook of great religions is filled with violent stories, where God exacts vengeance on the humans who wronged him.

I see Avatar as a means for our world culture to exercise demons of its past, in the form of lamenting the horror of our story and how disappointing our world has been for so many over the centuries. Avatar is Cameron’s vehicle for imagining a better world. The story of the Tulkun is the story of our whales. And the story of the Na’vi is the story of indigenous peoples everywhere. But what if we lived in a world where whales could fight back and didn’t passively let humans slaughter them centuries for their oil? Or what if the indigenous could mount a defense against the imperialists and win! What a spectacle that would be, for bows and arrows to defeat tanks and gunships, and imagine how gratifying it would feel for those traumatized by the story of native american genocide, or someone who loves nature and wants to see our world fight back against corporate greed destroying the environment for the sake of profit.

This is the power and value I see in art. Sure, there are people who don’t get it. One may use an example of a young boy who shoots up a movie theater screening of Batman. Some may argue “Batman and other movies incite violence and this is proof!” But what if this young man had the bulwark of art in his life, to help him exercise his demons before they played him like a puppet. That’s where my idea for “Temples of Light” comes in.

Movie theaters are like a universal temple spread across every continent and nation, with stories that transcend borders and barriers of all kinds, drawing diverse masses into theater temples for a profoundly sacred experience, transcending human differences bound to race, class, religion, sexual orientation, gender discrimination and nationality. What if this global entity in a sleeping state, could awaken and even strengthen through the power of fellowship, making the audience feel they are part of a new family that truly sees them; a place where we can exercise demons, and dreams can be made more powerful than nightmares.

This is the fellowship and tribe I long for, but doesn’t yet exist. Because I don’t see anyone trying to create this, I have to do what I can to imagine that it’s real, hoping to turn my dreams to reality.

🎥✨📽️✨🌟✨✌🏽👁🌍👁

I talk about all this in my Avatar video from last year, https://youtu.be/SfrhQrz4Vg4 and hope to continue the conversation soon in my Avatar 2 video.

#avatar #avatar2 #james cameron #jamescameron #pandora #navi #thewayofthewater #worldspirit

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marissapaul · 1 year

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final project and reflection

so i really enjoyed this project. i was quite anxious for it at the beginning for a number of reasons, but as i got going i came to love and appreciate it. as a trans person i don't like audio projects or talking out loud as that is one of the ways in which i show up that can be othering. i don't necessarily have dysphoria about my voice, in fact i quite like it, but there is always a worry in the back of my mind that my voice doesn't match what people might be expecting when they see my name. but as i got going i really got into the groove of talking, or at least as much of a groove as i can get into as someone who far prefers writing over talking. nonetheless, i had a really great experience with this. the other thing i was anxious about is that i don't have a ton of experience analyzing and critically engaging with art. i'm still new to that aspect of life, i got some practice with it in undergrad and again in the latina feminisms minimester class where i reflected on an art exhibition called "mapa wiya (your map's not needed)" which is an aboriginal art piece that was on display at the menil in houston where i saw it.

this is the title piece of the exhibition and i like it a lot. the exhibition is all about land back and reclaiming indigenous modes of knowledge. it rejects the artificially created borders and lines that colonizers drew up and gets back to indigenous understandings of geography, space, and of living. but beyond that, i didn't have much experience with this, and coming from a world where i was taught that you were either born with the "art gene" or you weren't and that it was just an intrinsic talent and not something that artists spend years and decades meticulously honing. but through dra. sotomayor's classes i have come to deconstruct that way of thinking, in fact i consider myself an artist now, i consider my thesis to be art, i consider my very amateur paintings to be art, i now see art as the ways in which i communicate with the world. throughout my years on this earth i have collected words and frameworks and lenses through which i have come to understand the universe and my place in it and i view the things i create as art that shares those lessons that i have learned with others.

so as i started this project i entered with that mindset, but i was having trouble sifting through the artists and their art to find something that really resonated with me and that i could speak on with the lessons of this semester and i eventually discovered renee stout's "when 6 was 9" exhibition and i fell in love. the exhibition is all about imagining the otherwise, especially when the physical world we live in and reality we endure is too much, she is telling us to turn to the imagination. and she isn't just asking us to imagine, she's asking us to bring about that imagination in our own lives, and i think that is really powerful. we have seen time and again this semester how the spiritual systems we have been learning about are based in the here and now realities of their practitioners and that is what renee is offering up in this exhibition. though the focus is imagination, it is through imagination that she is leading us towards liberation and towards actualizing that world that we imagine, a world post-capitalism, imperialism, racism.

i really got into a groove towards the back half, i am not always the most clear speaker, i much prefer writing as i have spent far more time honing my writing voice than my speaking voice - for reasons mentioned above - but i enjoyed this. my throat is a little dry from talking more than i have in quite a while, but i am happy with what i have shared with the class and the world should they happen upon this link. this exhibition will absolutely remain in my mind as i go forward in life and in my academic journey in much the same way that mapa wiya has stuck with me for the past three years. i am beyond thankful for this opportunity to explore academic conversations in new and exciting ways that i definitely don't get to engage with in my history classes. i ended my latina feminisms blog with the missive, "let us go forth and create" and i am happy to report that i have. since that time i have written all three chapters of my thesis, i have gone on to paint a number of things including this super awesome mickey mouse painting that i'm proud of that i'll show below. so i suppose i don't have as clear a missive this time, but i would say lead with love, empathy, and imagination.

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