heyy uh, i mistook your boyfriend for a bone and buried him in the backyard. yeah, youre gonna have to go find and dig him up, sorry.
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I feel personally wronged by the fact my body language is so limited. No pointy ears to flatten. No tail to wag. No hackles to raise. No sharp teeth to bare.
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Kinda nonhuman because mental illness, kinda nonhuman because not being properly socialized as a kid, kinda nonhuman because queer, kinda nonhuman because angry at humanity, kinda nonhuman because longing for the unconditional love of a pet and it’s master, and kinda nonhuman because secret sixth thing.
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"not looking at someone when they're talking to you is rude"
okkaaayy welll i cocked my imaginary ears in your direction to communicate that i was listening so whose fault is it really
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shout out to boys who are also dogs
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"on the internet nobody knows you're a dog" wrong!!!!!! i told everybody
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why are you getting mad at me for chewing your shoes...? i'm literally transgender
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puts my massive paw on top of u
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my girlfriend told me we're going to the park, but this looks weirdly like the vet's office? haha crazy right
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you call it "being the mom of the friend group" i call it "livestock dog behavior"
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