#due to personal reasons i believe?

[just-browsing1222]

Reasons to "travel in time":

Watch Queen live.

Watch The Mechanisms live (like a lot)

Get The Mechanisms to write a Midas song

Stop atrocities.

Witness early internet.

Popular media prophet.

See all the stars from Earth.

Stonehenge but 5,000 years ago.

Early humans communities.

Crafts.

#disclaimer: due to my stance on time and our perception of it I fully believe that travelling “through time” is entirely impossible #i am #unfortunately #a “I could have done things differently” person #stuck in the past or something #time travel #reasons to time travel #time #the mechanisms #mention

[jinstronaut]

this is also why i stopped using my tracked tag for a while tbh

#and i might do it again bc its just #a reminder that no one rly cares abt what i do / who i am etc #which might sound over dramatic idk how else to describe it tho its just hollow #it feels very much like a Chore and a Task and if i dont reblog things fast enough from my tag #people get very angry and/or upset with me even tho theres just #so much content and i have 0 time so everything gets queued no matter what #like this whole experience feels like a chore lmao #and it never ever used to #but now theres so much animosity if i dont behave / interact with things Properly #or whatever the make believe rules are idk #this dash can just be so negative like have we all truly descended into madness during this hiatus #bc like i get it ive been up and down and all around too but ive never been straight up MEAN to anyone in this community #and i never want to either so this entire situation thats been bubbling for months just feels like shit #bc what the fuck changed and how do we get back to where we were #i never ever ever ever felt this way before like idk the middle of last year #but ever since like last fall its just been idk. Bad #once again im sorry if ive ever done anything to upset anyone but my silence / absence doesnt mean i dont care #ive just been Incredibly busy due to some real life changes that are out of my control #i might not have energy to answer everything but i do Read everything and it does make me smile #and i save messages that are kind in my heart so i can be reminded of the root of what this blog is supposed to be #a space for something im very passionate about and previously had nowhere else to express said passion #so like idk if we all like the same things why does this weird feeling of competition linger over us lmao #why do all ccs have to fight???? each other???? when we all love and do the same things???? #i have nothing against anyone personally but what i Do take issue with is the way that ive been doing this since 2021 and im fully just #ignored and shoved aside by so many people for reasons i fully dont know or understand #so yeah idk this is a novel i just woke up from a spontaneous nap bc im so exhausted i can only stay awake for 3 hours at a time #but yeah anyways idk ! #be nice its so easy ! #tbd

[canary-song]

Sometimes I think about all these spiderpeople meeting eachother for the first time in ITSV only to come home, alone again, isolated for however long it took to be involved again in the multiverse. You return to familiarity, a place you understand, but it's different now, there's something missing.

Briefly you felt so truly at home and understood, only to lose that. In the rush of chasing safety, you let go - now you're left wondering what exactly it is you let go of.

#blogcat: transmissions #spiderverse #itsv #mainly. #atsv #by proxy #ATSV actually *is* the reason I was thinking about this though. Miles and Gwen were desperate to reunite obv due to personal situations and- #emotions yeah. but you better bet I believe the rest of the cast felt a bit like that too though

[8rujaa]

to anyone dealing with ptsd, has there been anything that has helped relieve some of the symptoms?

#im emotionally stuck due to the constant reliving of what happened #i get these weirdly intense flashbacks where i can remember the how the fabric of the couch looked like up close #and how they felt. and how everything looked. the way the colored lights hit the room a certain way #i think i did myself a disservice by thinking i was soooo in love that i didn’t want to forget any details lmao #now i can remember everything like a photograph and sometimes i find myself back in my old apartment and the fear floods my chest #and i can’t breathe and my stomach starts turning it’s terrible. i really felt like i was in hell #i stopped smoking ouid 3 weeks ago bc whenever these flashbacks would happen the high would make them HD and it would send me into a loop #but now i think weed was the thing keeping me above water… it’s been a rough 3 weeks. but before i start smoking again #i wanted to ask if anyone found something else that made it a little easier #it’s been months since our break up and i really want to move on. i’ve tried to meet other people but i’m terrified of men #and i find myself unable to connect with anyone… #i’ve been physically better which i am so grateful for because being unhealthy was my biggest reason i was so depressed #i’ve been doing therapy but i talk about the same thing with her every week. i’m tired of it #i think i’m still in disbelief that they did that to me. i never thought they’d be capable of hurting someone so badly. #i can’t get over the fact that he r***** me for months while i was disabled and pretended not to know what he was doing was bad #i realized he knew when he tried to make it look like i was crazy. that made me really sad. i think i was hoping he was clueless so #i could still believe he was a good person… or at least the man i fell in love with. i was willing to forgive him once he apologized… #when he tried to make it seem like i was going insane the blindfold came off and i saw him for who he really was #like no wonder i was so scared of u dude… no wonder i kept having panic attacks anytime we were together and i couldn’t sleep next to u #i’ve been afraid to admit that shit broke me as a person. i don’t think i’ll ever be the same. i can’t function. #plus knowing i stayed for her bc i was worried for her and didn’t want her to experience the same thing without someone there bc i realized #how good he was at gaslighting and lying. only to find out she was waiting for an excuse to get rid of me… she wanted me gone… #i went thru all that for nothing… #and i still don’t understand why each time i tried to leave for my own good- to get medical help and support they begged me to stay!!! why #brain vomit

[itspileofgoodthings]

that viral tweet about clothes looking dead on Taylor made me sooooooo angry tbh. the writer can meet me in the pit.

#it made me so angry for a hundred reasons #But mostly because it missed the truth in its own lie #and the truth is that —in the BEST way —Taylor always looks like herself #and always looks …… kind of wholesome and straightforward #in her own words she is neither edgy sexy or cool #not inherently #she can make the vigilante shit outfit (and dance tbh) seem businesslike after a while #but that’s not —as the writer believes —due to a lack of personality but an excess of it!!!! #and the girl is not sexy in the way of packaged pop stars. she has no slinky oozing charm #she is straight as an arrow and completely vibrant and completely a girl’s girl #she is also a dork!!!!! #(a good thing) #This is why I think about the rep tour version of Dress all the time 😭 #the softness 😭😭😭 the colors 😭😭😭 the joy the humor the fun😭😭😭😭😭 #I’ve never seen an explicitly physical love story (which dress is) told with those qualities #like. Revolutionary tbh #but yeah. Taylor no matter what she’s wearing remains herself and the truest parts of her shine through no matter what

[roseofcards90]

What the fuck does “chronically online misogyny take” even mean 😭😭 why did this person call my message that when I just pointed out that female characters get treated more like shit than their male counterparts do in media

#not you calling it that when it’s so apparent #that she gets portrayed as more of the bad parent than he does #I’m so fucking confused??? #I’m not the one who’s boiling down a real life disorder to “I just don’t want kids anymore and I’m suddenly disinterested in being a parent” #I am the last person when it comes to believing they left because they were shitty literally all my aus and hcs involve them both together #and happy while the reason why they were gone was due to the disc pokemon #the whole fucking point of their dynamic and the ship is that they’re both equals?? What’s the point if you only treat one of them like shit #and your au isn’t canon I cannot believe you would refute me saying canon facts about the character with your au where you make her shitty #my posts

[soldsouls]

When Gale mentions he once summoned a magma mephit in his youth, says he was lovely and they still keep in touch, I imagine Luci just giving him the weirdest side look, the kind you could not possibly miss. You might assume he's thinking something nasty, but it's largely disbelief and "that's fckn weird". His own experience with mortals has been more in-line with Shovel's: starved, ignored, beaten, tossed around, all-in-all treated like an animal or worse than one. After all, imps and quasits and other such beings are generally considered "not people". He can't quite believe Gale feels differently.

#OOC / HOLLY. #starvation tw #abuse tw #I grant you mephits aren't fiends but the point stands #there are many among the magically inclined who treat familiars like crap #honestly Luci doesn't even consider himself a 'person' because he's an imp #and tis generally only elves / humans / dwarves / etc who are categorized as 'people' #not that he considers himself less than mind you. it doesn't bother him to not fall into the 'people' category #neither do archdevils. neither do angels. neither do gods. y'know? #the key point is the way you get treated when someone doesn't consider you a person #he's extremely shocked and mistrustful when other party members approach him like a person #moreso for the magically inclined like Gale or ppl with history with devils like Wyll and Karlach #at best he considers it a misguided reaction due to him appearing elven [if he LOOKED like an imp would they still treat him this way?] #or false politeness as so many adopt for manipulation #it would take a significant event to get him to believe it's genuine #he thinks he's clear on what his place is in the party and that it depends on him staying useful enough + just shy of overly irritating #[irritating to some degree is fine but there's a reason he won't antagonize Minthara for example #he thinks they'd all smash his head in without an ounce of regret if he pushes the wrong buttons #he's acutely aware some have far less tolerance than others [again Minthara] — that's his opinion on the matter anyway #whether it's true is up to whoever writes them of course]

[idiaa-shroxd]

YOUR WRITING IS SO PRETTY I COULD EAT IT. YOU CHARACTERIZE THE CHARACTERS SO WELL TOO!!!

thank you so much!! ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ happy you think my writing is very pretty!! and also makes me happy you think my characterization was correct.

when writing for characters always take a bit of extra time to ensure they sound good? thinking about having an actual conversation with them for a minute and what they’d do! ♧ personally a big fan of viginettes since that reveals a lot of a character more than mainstory.

Σ('◉⌓◉’) mini (huge) rant within the tags of the way of my process to understand a character!!

#i’ve been trying to work on characterization with trey for example because in the main story he is relatively nice #but within his viginettes he’s a bit more than that like a slightly smug teaser than boy next door. #the characters tend to have complexity rather than one dimension traits people tend to stick by #which isn’t a bad thing but to start writing it could help kick you off but majority of the time your characters do have many emotions to #aspirations- such as vil being mean BUT that coming with subtle charm of care- he does not derive pleasure from purposefully degrading other #he firmly believes he can see the beauty in everyone if they try and he attempts to get others to apply themselves so they can be pretty #he does not go around like ew you’re ugly go away unless you have a negative attitude like leona who purposefully does not put any effort #but sometimes his pursuit for beauty can go out of hand like with epel or neige but his dorm ssr perfectly illustrates he knows what he does #he does not always explain himself with having epel do heavy lifting which only helps epel improve but he would not tell him this directly #there are other characters i can rant about the way i write. such as sebek being a malleus fanboy #but that was not a central part of his personality to warrant every fic just mentioning malleus each sentence #the best way to learn how to write for him would be looking at his viginette or his event story without tsunotarou!! he is quite a wonderful #-ly designed character but gets overlooked due to his ‘louder’ part of his personality. but he genuinely has captivated me as a character #the best examples for eng players would be during harveston- when he was extremely passionate about what he did with a soft side for his #plush!! he’s a big softie. he’s just very confused because his grandfather openly hates humans. he acknowledges marja and complimented her #he’s not hating humans for no reason but because it was taught to him. he’s trying his best to be what he is but you can tell he is not too #prideful that he would refuse to acknowledge marja just for being a human. in fact in his viginette he HELPS humans with their lumber #though that is technically due to him being confident he can do so compared to a human thanks to being a guard for Malleus but he is quite #happy to be complimented!!-. he is a character with more depth: ceremony viginette next #he tells yuu to just let him handle things since he’s stronger which shows he’s also blunt and says things without thinking about others at #times. but people are MISSING out on fics with sebek yuu and tea bonding over tsunotarou because he has no hostility to those who like #tsunotarou. he is happy to teach!! his other viginette think pe??: lilia tricks him into eating steak with yogurt iirc and he does honestly #it’s disgusting but he trusts lilia and 100% believe the old fae. THE POTENTIAL. authors need to use that?? just lilia messing with him or #how he can sometimes be so gullible you can get him to trust you mixed together with how attached he was to squirrel plush #he’s actually such a cute character. #there’s also Kalim who KNOWS there are bad people. he is not innocent as he knows there are bad people that want him gone #his least favorite food is curry because Jamil got sick for a week after taste testing his food. #Kalim just chooses. he wants to believe the kindness of the world not due to purity but due to the fact he does not want to live in constant #fear. which in itself already makes him more than one dimension. he may seem carefree but there’s room to play with when describing him??… #questions of styx.

[angsttronaut]

Both Reddit and Tumblr frequently have absolutely bizarre takes, but at least Tumblr usually has at least some people pointing out a take is accursed if it gets enough notes.

#brought to you by seeing the 300th pro eugenics believing in overpopulation take with dozens of comments agreeing with it on reddit #please avert your eyes right now if you don't want to see a silly lil rant #other things i have seen this past week (i swear reddit has been worse than usual for some reason as of late): #everyone in us red states deserves to suffer and die #everyone who has children is fundamentally evil due to the state of this world #someone who does not instantly leave their abuser is spineless regardless of how difficult or dangerous it may be to leave #rural communities should not exist #giving someone a handmade gift for christmas is inherently bad #various dreadful takes in r/ireland i have blocked out for the sake of my immortal soul #long acrylics bad ...in a subreddit devoted to nails and nail art in general (they weren't even especially long imho!) #general ableism #personal #going to unsub from quite a few subreddits as you can probably tell from this foot long list lmao #but tragically i keep on being punched in the spleen by bad posts from r/ireland semi often because it can be the best place to look up #specific shit

[umilily]

the poll on hated subjects in school made me remember the single most unhinged class i ever had, which was my last politics lesson in 10th grade. everyone (first and foremost our teacher) was screaming and insulting each other. people were crying and some just deadass left out of protest in the middle of it. it was absolutely surreal.

#lily talks #it's been a while but iirc the whole thing happened bc of a discussion about israel #which in light of recent events feels incredibly ironic #i do not say this lightly but the woman teaching the class had ISSUES #certainly on a personal level #but also it was actually harrowing to witness this person using her postion (teaching politics and ethics) for no other reason than to forc #her own political believes onto as many kids as possible #and if anyone dared to disagree (which of course little me did first thing when she took over the class in 8th grade) she not only gave us #bad grades for the entire 3 years we had her class (of coruse with no good reasoning even just to pretend) #but also dubbed all of them nazis or sexist or any other wildly problematic thing you could imagine #even if and in most cases especially when it had absolutely nothing to do with the topic at hand #naturally everyone present quickly developed a rather sarcastic and grim sense of humor when dealing with this person #like 'what crime will i be accused of this week? find out after the break' #my personal highlight still was the time i was supposed to describe a very low-res black and white picture with a woman and #a lot of boxes full of fresh produce #which i phrased as such but then made the mistake of adding that i (due to the quality) could not make out where this was taken #which was my teachers cue to spend the next 5 minutes reprimanding me bc apparently 'THIS WOMAN HAS HER OWN STORE!' (good for her) #and by not mentioning that i was being misogynistic #so there. now you know it. i am a horrible person who uses the medium of overhead transparencies to spread misogyny. #anyway- #the truly entertaining thing was the guy who had to do the same with the next picture which was some dude selling kebab #for some reason the teacher liked him even though he constantly made fun of her #i don't know if she just didn't get it? #so he came up with the fanciest most over the top proper officialese for saying 'kebab guy' #naturally she sang the highest praises #moral of the story: when in doubt call the kebab vendor of your trust 'Fachkraft für Rollfleisch-Management'

[seagullcharmer]

you can tell the brainrot is real...... (watching old danandphilgames videos) (specifically the first keep talking and nobody explodes) (imagining dale and bob playing it) (even though they're from. 1972 and obviously the game did not exist yet) (and they would both likely have ww2 childhood trauma so bombs are not really a good idea here) (anyway)

#libra.txt #anyway. i think very fondly abt dale&bob #even though there is no reason for them to actually be friends #since they only interact with each other in canon because of laura's death #and their only 'interactions' are not what would have Actually happened! #(cube escape: theatre being inside of dale's mind)(and the scene in the white door being bob dreaming) #(therefore neither are reliable accounts of their personal interactions) #like technically the only time they interact outside of mind shenanigans is the very brief bit in case 23 chapter 2 #when dale looks through the window and sees bob in the holding cell + bob becoming corrupted #like yeah bob comes up to the window and smashes it #but he and dale don't /technically/ interact #anyway all of this to say that i believe they were childhood friends but dale completely forgot abt it #(partly due to [gestures at childhood trauma both canon and implied] and partly due to just growing up and forgetting stuff) #(like i completely forgot one girl i did a play with in 5th grade and then we went to the same high school and she's still miffed) #meanwhile bob is miffed that dale forgot. and also bob's going thru it bc he's now the lead suspect in laura's death #if you're still reading this: hi i forgot where i was going

[thornedswan]

I don't get how...people don't comprehend that I don't wanna do T because of my own reasons and worries

#tae.txt #Like...it's complicated mainly because I am 100% scared of surgery and my main dysphoria comes from my chest #like the MAJORITY of it is from my chest and anything else I am just personally terrified with undergoing because my body is already shit #as is kfhdjdhdjej and I'm also sad because I likely wont even be able to reduce chest/remove etc due to my intense fear of surgery #the last time i went under anesthesia was terrifying for me :D djagkegsksgs #so yes I am sad that there is a likelihood that i wont remove these things!!! but it is what it is because I am absolutely terrified #so I really don't get why people are so angry for those who choose not to do T for their own personal reasons and worries... #the only thing I firmly believe is that people should do what feels most comfortable to them— so long as they are able to feel good in #themselves whichever route they take with or without T because in the end it's their body and if you wont respect me without T then?? #anyway trans ranting end #this fellow is tired. I only want to feel as comfortable as I can even if everything else disagrees

[katnissgirlsmakedo]

decided to just be a bad person and ghost my group. sorry. well it's not ghosting when i already told them what i was doing and that i didn't want to do this stupid thing tonight. those were my first and final words peace and love i will contact you when i have written and submitted this stupid fucking essay on fascism and gender. like not to be horrible but i cannot deal with them today i'm beyond over that cunt sorry for using that word. but she's acting like a high schooler that only cares about getting an A. you are an adult can you chill with the academic pressure.

#can't believe they're still making me write essays. writing essasy should be illegal after a person turns 20 #beth.txt #she like. very much has a vibe of only wanting to pass the class and do well grade wise. and she doesn't actually care about what we're doi #we are supposed to be making a short film girl why do you only care about grades #yeah ok you could argue that i'm the one that doesn't care because i'm not doing the assignment #but i don't need to be making a moodboard ass presentation four days before it's due #i know what the vibe for the film is. i know what i want it to look like. very Dude Just Trust Me #this girl does not trust me it's insane. and when have i ever given her a reason to believe i can't do my shit. never. i've done everything #i wrote the fucking thing. literally just trust me #whatever. have to start an essay. and eventually eat something ig

[forgaeven1]

perhaps i'd be more articulate the next time i'll write this down, but just know this - my portrayal of neville will always love hermione quite whole-heartedly. i wish i have the brain capacity to describe just how much hermione means to neville, but let's just say it encapsulates beyond even a romantic notion; it's everything. loving, respecting, being around hermione simply to enjoy her company is purely a selfless act that brings immense satisfaction and enjoyment for him. again, his actions [for any hermione portrayals] may came out incredibly romantic, although please be forewarned that this is in no way of me pushing for a ship — for i, too, much rather build a dynamic than forcing one — but simply the way i've interpreted his mannerisms when it came to the witch. i hope this may clear some things up!

#but also : nev is pretty chaste and sweet 2 herm #bc in a way he puts her on a pedestal and all he wants is to comfort her. please her. ease her. etc #like he loves her so much that that's all he wants to do #but if he WERE romantically interested in her... then herm would probs realise nev... have his rough edges #like i'll talk abt THAT another day #but yes. he's sorta lowkey glorifying her which meant #he does hide SOME aspects of himself as to... i suppose. not taint the perception he believes she has of him #on the contrary - in that aspect; he might've been more honest with luna and ginny about #like how he curses easily when he drinks. and yeah. around gin he likes drinking #he..... does search for sex to cope....... but again. i'll talk abt THIS another day #he can be a BIG shameless flirt #he's grown a lot confident after the war - but with herm he tames a lot of that personality down #he puts that away rather; he wants to prioritise herm. #and i wonder why.. #perhaps due to how long they'd gotten separated during the war ? or maybe he just didnt want to disappoint her for some reason ? #hmm.... curious. curiouser. #neville. #neville; information.

[seilon]

kinda wild how you can have almost every aspect of your life deeply intertwined with someone else for years and then have all of that thrown in your face when that person decides none of it meant anything and, in fact, was toxic and purge-worthy

#hahahaha it’s been a bad day #and I am spiraling and all around not having a good time #I keep looking at the bulletin board in my room that used to make me so happy to look at because of all the good memories on it and the #reminder of there being people who care about me and now it just sorta. does the opposite #most of it just makes me feel. dread. #he’s in almost every picture and 80% of the people in the pictures in general I don’t talk to anymore for one reason or another #mostly people who just drifted away because I’m absolutely terrible at staying in touch with people #like not in a quirky way. like actually actively ruins relationships for no reason level bas #but some of them are people who purposefully don’t talk to me anymore #found out recently about one of these people. it’s someone I’d been friends with for like 15 years. purposefully blocked me #I believe because of whatever bullshit my ex has told her. she never asked me about anything so whatever she knows is #heavily biased and probably warped #because I don’t have anyone advocating for me. lol #even my close friends- the extremely few I have- are ‘neutral’ on it. which. im gonna be honest hurts me quite a bit. I have no one who #truly condemns him for the way he’s handled (lack thereof) all this and bolstered all my trust issues in the process and has made me #constantly critical of my own intentions because I can never trust that what I do or say is manipulative or ‘unhealthy’ anymore and I don’t #think I’m an all around good person on top of that because of my low empathy and all that and etc etc etc. it’s really fucked me up #but yeah anyway. yeah. they’re still on good terms with him more or less (though not as close as I am but that’s partly just due to me being #physically close rather than in another city). and it honestly hurts me that they could actively be centrists here #like I. just. really don’t trust anyone anymore. how the fuck could I #uh. anyway. im not sure if i want to take the board down all together or just take off almost all the photos on it #not sure what’s more depressing #cause they’re both pretty bad lol. almost all my major good memories from the past five years have included my ex so they’re basically all #tainted and unpleasant to look back on now. really just wasted five years of my life for this #another reason I’m constantly contemplating my own intentions these days is because I have a lot of thoughts and urges that I’d never do but #that are. related to purposefully hurting others or myself physically or emotionally or both. like. every part of me wants to deck my ex in #the face but obviously I’d never do that. but even just the compulsion feels like a justification of his narrative/view of me as a person #like haha maybe I am a shitty toxic abusive manipulative bastard. maybe I do just deserve to be alone where I can’t hurt or think about #hurting anyone. it’d definitely be better all-around if I didn’t fucking exist. burden lifted. but you know. #not sure how im like this but also egotistical and self centered but alas here we are. anyway I’ll delete this soon sorry

[navree]

well damn now i REALLY wanna write that sansa v arya au huh

#personal #in my defense the tudors was like little amélie's very first historical obsession #i entered historical interest basically by becoming a hardcore mary i stan #so i know a LOT about all of these people #and honestly i maintain that beyond northern independence being stupid politically #there's no way the northern succession won't get messy as hell like dance of dragons level messy #jon is robb's named heir. bran is the legitimate heir due to westerosi law. rickon has been living in the north the most. #sansa's got the vale at her back and littlefinger's machinations. arya's clearly fondly remembered and already has people rallied to her. #(even tho they're not actually to her) #and all three of them are probably gonna have really solid reasons for believing They should be in charge #along with different factions supporting each one #(again that's why i think northern independence is messy because the most logical way out of this is just bringing the north back) #(not to mention that again it's just a stupid idea) #but point is now i wanna write that mess through an elizabeth v mary lens