#going a lot slower obv

[florida3exclamationpoints]

I don't usually get mad when I'm driving but uuuuuuhghgduegehebjebr

#ill get frustrated. bc people are scary. but not mad #my dive to work is mostly a 2 lane highway #until it opens up to 3 lanes for the exit i get off #the 3rd lane last about a mile #i get over as soon as it opens #ok. so i get over. and this big work truck gets over right in front of me #going a lot slower obv #i have to slam on the brakes but i dont wanna risk trying to pass him and missing the exit so i just deal with it #we are going 10 under for a mile before my exit 😐 but its whatever #until!!! RIGHT BEFORE it exits #the truck. GETS BACK OVER IN THE MIDDLE LANE #HE DIDN'T HAVE TO GET OFF #EXCUSE ME???????? #there were SO MANY signs that say EXIT ONLY this is an EXIT #and he thought oh it would be fun to go super slow right there :) dont need to get off tho :) #HELLO????? #omg i got so ticked off akdhsjdndj #im good now tho 😘✌️ thx for letting me rant 😘✌️

[yeah-this-is-my-username]

it's almost midnight and I NEED to talk about lovejoy with someone please I WILL EXPLODE !!!!!!!!!! ramblings in tags ^_^

#theyve come so so far and i am so so very proud of them i am going to cryyyyyyyy #my boys my boys all of them are such creative pple and they deserve the world and then the universe !!!!!!! #lovejoy also have such a unique sound its like !!!!!!!!! the genre they play can get to be very similar with other music very quickly #but they just find a way to make it work !!!!!!!!! they have such a uniqueness that most musicians dont and its incredible how the universe #just made these four ppl meet at the best time for them to form a banger and be successful !!!!!!!!! like obv is there werent a pandemic #theyd still be equally as successful but i think maybe its be slower ? idk bc a lot of wilburs audience migrated to lvjy #and while im not saying wilburs fame made the band it definitely helped boost them soooo much !!!!!!!!!!!!! #theyd still grow big bc their music is good !!!!!!!!!! you dont get that with a lot of ccs turned musicians #its arrgrhhhhhhhgggg man i love lvjy #something about their music itches my brain and makes me incredibly incredibly happy all the time !!!!!!!!! #and i wanna talk about how all of them are so creative as well #i mean we see it obvious with ash and wilbur . ash with his vlogs and wilbur with his stories but joe and mark really are so talented too #mark with his phenomenal drumming skills . like !!!!!!!!!! hes insane on the drums !!!!!!!!! so so good theres no one else like him man #and joe !!!!!!!!! he helps with lyrics and really really good riffs and he doesnt get enough appreciation !!!!!!! honestly #okay okay i think im done now if anyone read all this way ty for listening ^_^ now go listen to lovejoy !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #and im still up to chat if anyone wants to :D

[muldermuse]

this is kind of a ramble so bear with me:

thinking about sending two sinners!gator into an absolute tailspin when he shows up to your house to see everything in boxes and your clothes packed up in a few suitcases by the door

he’s like ????? WHAT IS GOING ON WHERE ARE YOU GOING???? and just casually saying “skipping town” and going to kiss him and he’s like ??????

i can only imagine the catharsis of telling him that “there’s nothing in fargo for me, most of the town hates me and the ones who don’t just wanna fuck me, you’re probably gonna marry glenda which will only make everyone hate me even more if they find out i’m the other woman. So I want to live somewhere else. I’m not happy here.” and he obv freaks out

and maybe you’re just going to stay at a friends house while your place gets painted, but maybe leaving was on your mind (it’s easier to sell a house with fresh paint👀), and maybe you wanted to see how serious he was about coming with you…but none of that is any of his business…

i’m usually not an angst girlie but i’m on my period and it’s probably a safer bet to be melodramatic and pick a fight with a fictional man than one i actually know 😭😭

ok this ask made me feral, i felt so ANGSTY writing it

thank u so much for sending it through angel <3

18+ only!! Angst below the cut!! Gator is mean and reader is maybe meaner. They're both terrible people. He calls her a whore, she calls him a lot of mean names. Mentions of smut but no actual smut.

Maybe, this is super far in the future for the two sinners fic or maybe it is not canon. who knows!!! not me!!!

You’re not sure how he found out. You’ve quietly handed your notice in at work and said goodbye to the few in this shitty town you care about. Jenson, Jax and Steve have been ghosted (but you know that they’d all come back with a simple ‘you up?’ text). You weren’t going to tell Gator you were leaving- he didn’t deserve a goodbye. You’d planned to go for 3 months as your place was going to get renovated in that time (you’d been saving up for years to make it more of a home). So, you thought that the months away would be an opportunity to become a new person. A better person. Someone who didn’t fuck pathetic Sheriffs. If anyone looked in; they’d think you were going forever. You’d decided that as soon as you left, you’d block Gator and when (or if) you returned, you’d avoid him like the plague.

The U-HAUL parked in your drive probably gave it away. Or when Glenda saw you filling up your truck and made a snide comment about what you were doing. Or maybe it was when you fucked him 2 days ago he made a passing comment about how empty your home looked. Since then, the entire hall area is covered in boxes filled with your possessions. You try not to let it depress you that your whole life has been packed up in a matter of days. You need a fresh start, you’re moving in with a friend a few towns over and you can be whoever you want to be for a few months. No one there has to know that you’ve been fucking a loser in a relationship for the best part of 2 years. You know it’s him as soon as he knocks on the door, no one knocks as loud as him and other people wait to be invited in. Gator lets himself in as you’re checking your backpack one final time.

“The fuck is all this shit?” He kicks a box that’s in his way and you’re thankful you don’t hear a shatter. “Saw the U-Haul and uh- Glenda saw you fillin’ up. Plannin’ a trip or somethin’?”. He tries to sound unbothered but you know him better than that.

You don’t look at him when you tell him, “Yeah, I’m leaving”. You tell yourself that it’s because you’re checking your backpack but really it’s because you can feel the adrenaline pumping through your veins and you’re trying to compose yourself before you lose your shit.

“The fuck did you jus’ fuckin’ say?”

“Sorry, I’ll say it slower because you’re a fuckin’ idiot. I am leaving”. You draw out the last three words and stare at him. You can hear your heart thumping in your ears as you try to read the expression on his face. It’s a mix of anger, confusion, and sadness. A soft kiss his pressed to his cheek as you walk into the dining room to check your toiletries box. That’s the only pleasantry you’ll exchange with him today- or maybe ever again.

His boots stomp behind you as he follows you in. “Well, where are you goin’?”

“I’ll tell you when I’m there, Gator. Now you can fuck off back to Glenda and play fuckin’ happy families for the rest of your life”.

“Well- why are you leavin’? You’ve never mentioned this before”. His voice breaks as he speaks, either a sign he’s getting choked up or he’s getting really angry.

You can feel the anger rattling in your chest and the sound of your heartbeat in your ears becomes overwhelming. “Why am I going? Gator, everyone in this town fuckin’ hates me or thinks that I’m a total whore because of your fuckin’ bitch of a girlfriend. Who- by the way, you’re goin’ to marry because you’re too fuckin’ chickenshit to upset your crazy daddy…” You slam your hands on the table and take a quick breath, “Gator- I fuckin’ hate it here, I’m miserable and I can’t do it any longer- it’s killin’ me”.

He’s stood opposite you and fuck, does he look mad. He doesn’t move for a minute but then shoves your boxes off the table and kicks them when they hit the floor. After a few seconds, he kicks them again with more force and slams his hands on the table.

“Yeah, real fuckin’ mature Gator, breaking my shit beca-“

“What about this? What about us?” His voice is more muted than you’ve ever heard it. His breath is shuddering gasps. You’re unsure why it enrages you.

You laugh cruelly, “What us? What the fuck are you talking about? Gator, you have a fuckin’ girlfriend who you’re going to marry.”

“Yeah but when has that stopped you- huh? You can’t put this all on me. You’re jus’ as bad as me.”

He moves to stand in front of you. The energy in the room is charged, usually, when it feels like this between the pair of you, it would end in some angry sex where you’re both trying to dominate the other person but you both know that isn’t going to happen today. 

“You’re movin’ away to be a fuckin’ whore somewhere else... or because you’re jealous of Glenda. She gets all of me and you jus’ get the fuckin’ scraps”. His smile is wicked and his eyes look darker than you’ve ever seen them.

You take a step closer to him, “I couldn’t think of anything fucking worse than havin’ all of you. You’re a pathetic fuckin’ daddy’s boy who’s never won anythin’ in his life”. You get close enough to whisper in his ear, “you’re a fuckin’ loser, Gator.”

You hate how much you want to fuck him in this moment and by the red bloom that’s creeping up his neck; you know he feels the same.

He leaves your home silently. He kicks another box on his way out and you finally hear a shatter. His tyres spin as his car races off your front lawn. 

You should block his number and know that that is the end of this awful affair. 

But you both know that it isn’t.

#gator tillman fanfic #gator tillman #gator tillman smut #gator tillman angst #gator tillman fic #gator x reader #gator tillman x fem!reader #gator tillman x reader #gator tillman x you #gator tillman x f!reader #fargofx #fargo s5 #fargo season 5 #fargo fx #fargo #fargoedit #joe keery x reader #joe keery smut #joe keery #joe keery angst #two sinners works

[nian-7]

hey! i see ur reqs are open, may i req pjsk boys (separate) taking fem reader to prom? like obvs established relationship, but like them reacting to her dress, the actual experience itself, and all that fun stuff. if you have to, you can make it gn reader! have a good day :)

sure, this sounds super cute! enjoy!

Akito, Tsukasa, Toya, Rui x fem!reader

✧taking their gf (you!) to prom

✧fluff

-Honestly, he's only going because you asked him. He wasn't really all that interested in it and wasn't planning on asking you to go until you showed an interest in it.

-He tries his best to be gentlemanly and formal but you just end up laughing a little at his attempts. He kisses your hand when he picks you up at your house and would rather get there when you finish rather than waiting for you to finish getting ready.

-Akito holds your hand for 90% of the night. The only times he lets go is when you decide to go dance with your friends or are eating. He doesn't really want to leave your side just because he's not particularly a fan of this whole thing. He wants you to enjoy yourself though!

-Terrible slow dancer honestly. Even though it's at such a slower pace than what he normally does, he can't help but mess up. He's a bit nervous and so he's almost stepped on your foot more than once.

-The most you'll get out of him for a compliment is "Nice dress." or "I like your makeup/hair". He's trying to save himself from the embarrassment of having thought how pretty you are and how much it's made him feel all fuzzy inside.

-It's such a blast with Tsukasa. You both have so much fun. Whenever a popular song comes on, he'll take you to dance with him to it. Genuinely you both have the best time and it's an overall super fun experience.

-He talks to your parents while you finish getting ready and you're honestly not sure if you should feel embarrassed or happy that they get along but you can't help but over hear your parents saying something embarrassing about you..

-Both him and Saki went with you to pick out your dress and his suit for the night. Even though you can't say that they were much help because each one you tried on, you got lots of compliments and encouragement from the two. It ended up being a hard decision since Tsukasa agreed on liking nearly every single one.

-Matches his tie with whatever color dress you've picked. He takes so many pictures of the two of you as well. A lot of them are just silly ones but there's a few actual ones sprinkled in.

-He would like to take you out to dinner before the actual dance starts. It's a bit more special when it's just the two of you together at a restaurant rather than sitting with a bunch of other people at prom to eat dinner.

-He's such a gentleman. He meets you at your house before you both go and sits patiently while you finish getting ready. He is in no hurry at all and honestly, he'd be lying if he said he wasn't nervous about the whole experience.

-100% matched his suit with your dress. He would like the dress itself to be a surprise but he also wanted to match with you so you both had to decide on a color to go with. Toya is truly okay with whatever colors you pick but, he'd likely go for a blue and black color scheme.

-At a loss for words when you come out of your room when you've finished. All he can do is clear his throat once he feels like he's stared too long and made it awkward. He's never been to such a formal event before so it's a first for him seeing you in such a formal outfit.

-Toya will slow dance with you when the right song comes on. He's surprisingly good at it and it makes you think he practiced before that night (he probably did..). A bit hesitant with his hands but he'll ease up and rest them on your lower back.

-He's the perfect date for prom in all. He makes it such a great experience for you without even trying. Toya just has a great time because you're there, he doesn't particularly care about the music or the food or anything as much as he does for you that night.

-Again, Rui wouldn't really be all that big on prom or very interested in it unless you showed an interest. He'll ask you to prom only if you show that you are interested in it.

-He took a picture of the two of you at prom and then you noticed later in the night that he actually had made it his lockscreen. He thought it was a good picture so he just decided to make it his lockscreen for his phone!

-Super chill about the whole thing. Yes, he's having fun with you, he just doesn't particularly have an interest in most of the activities. He'll follow you around, dancing with you if you ask him to or participate in any of the activities they have.

-He sure as hell flustered you quite a few times during the night. Whether it be with a kiss or his words, he truly did it unintentionally the first few times!

-Rui doesn't mind if you want to go hang out with your friends for a bit during prom, he'll wander till he finds Nene or Tsukasa (if they're even there) and chat with them till you come and find him again.

please do not repost any of my work without my permission, thank you for reading.

#x reader #fluff #nian-anon #akito x reader #akito shinonome x reader #akito shinonome #toya aoyagi x reader #toya aoyagi #toya x reader #rui kamishiro x reader #rui kamishiro #rui x reader #tsukasa tenma x reader #tsukasa x reader #tsukasa tenma #project sekai x reader #project sekai #female reader #fem reader

[bcolfanfic]

Sorry if you've received this like 20 times (got the circle of doom) - if you're accepting nsfw anons, how'd the youngvets boys first time go down? ;)

haha dw, tumblr is a lil shit sometimes!

doing a lil minimal research, during their time in africa (i'm still going back and forth with what base theyre at but for this lets go with air base 201) their housing would prob be these little things. it almost feels too easy to make them roommates lol, so i'm going w/ gale being with blakely and bucky being with demarco.

they're obv pretty glued at the hip at this point even when they've only kissed and haven't slept together yet. spend a lot of time in the other one's CHU when they're able to but. they don't really know blakely or demarco very well yet so they try to be discreet about What's Really Going On.

then maybe one day demarco comes back from the gym sooner than they thought he would. doesn't like- walk in on them making out or something but. they're close enough that it's obvious they aren't just close talking as buddies. it's okay though bc longer hc for another time short, demarco is obv a chill dude. even if he makes em both wanna die a little when he starts telling them every waking time he's going to be out of the CHU for a little lmfao. comes up to bucky when they're leaving dinner like hey (: i'm gonna go to the gym (: for an hour and fifteen minutes and 30 seconds (: takes me ten minutes to walk there (: probably gonna take it slower walking back. so add 15 (: smacks his shoulder when he's going all red faced.

anddd at long last since they're less jumpy about everything they do get a lil more heated than normal when they're making out, one thing leads to another etc etc. bucky has been with ppl across genders but gale hasn't so i think he very much takes the lead- and tops that first time + the first couple times after. lovesss seeing gale all flushed and squirmy under him, likes being able to manhandle him a little to get his leg around his hip etc etc.

but my larger hc for this au is that bucky is a bottom sooo we gotta get there somehow LOL. i think that while gale for sure doesn't *dislike* bucky fucking him silly (at all!)- he does kinda have a post-sex realization one night that he thinks he'd 'get more out of it' or whatever if he was on top. doesn't mind being out of control when it comes to bucky, but *in general* prefers being the one in control. just the way he's wired. for a lot of reasons.

and god he's soo nervous bringing it up to bucky. thinks he's not gonna be into it and reject him and then they're never gonna sleep together again and everything is gonna get weird. ends up getting so nervous he just blurts it out one night when they're gettin' hot and heavy with the making out. face all red and won't look at bucky when he's waiting for his response.

butttt he can rest assured knowing he was all worried for nothing bc bucky is veryyyy down. was fine "taking over" bc he was the more experienced one and thought that's just what gale wanted but. more than happy to get fucked into next week by his boy and that big pretty dick of his :p

#young vets au #clegan #buckbucky

[drawlody]

Wip of my Overlord!Adam n Sinner!Adam designs:D

Update: Now Overlord!Adam is more chimera-ish, I saw an idea bout him staying at a cathedral n wanna use it so bad damnnn. Sinner!Adam I decided agaisnt the wings n opt for a tail, would be funny if he was to sneak stuff with his tail n shit

Why 2? Cause i cant decied if having the mask morph into his face or just regular human face is cooler :DDDDD

Overlord: is not at the hotel, is doing relativecally fine through hell, he will get redeem albeit slower n more fucked up. Im thinking bout ripping off half the wings so he cant fly but can still use them to appear larger (plz i hold on this idea for 4y already i want to use it so bad). I'll give him some tattoos representing Eve n the kids cause DADAM IS THE BEST ADAM (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ) also should i give him a tail hmmmmm???

Sinner: is at the hotel redeeming n is miserable, yes that is a skirt i saw that idea in 2 fics n it havent leave my mind once, it would be the closest thing he got to a robe, was thinking bout like a garderner apron but it look off so leather jacket it is. Off-coloured wings or no wings? On one hand having him curl up crying but unable to wrap himself in the wings is a delightfully painful ass image i would love to use but i also feel like without the wings it feel like its missing smth (cause technically it is ¯\_(ツ)_/¯) maybe really small wings??? like enough to lift him off ground but not enough to fly around n be use as a blanky how r we feeling bout that hmmm. Also idk if ya can tell but he only got 1 horn, cause he ripped off one:DDDDD

A lot of these design choice is the result of the 400+ adamsapple fics i read which btw update slow as hell today man i cant go an entire day with only one 2k word chap man plzzzzzzz (if ya want those fics do tell me ill try to find the ones im talking bout here)

Fun fact: i learn to draw chubby people specifically for this man (((o(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)o))) like i wanna learn eventually but never really comfortable stepping out of my comfort zone. That is until this fucker came along n i will hate myself if i draw him as a twink

(as much as i love twinks this aint the char for that)

Plz go ahead n tell me bout ya own interpertation of Adam designs in hell:D!!! Like what hc r ya using here? i saw many go with robes, many go with the rocker vibe which obvs love that , litterally using that for mine (*✧×✧*) one even go full whore mode n i gotta say ✨slay✨

I'll go through each design choices once i finished the thingy so watch out for that :DDD

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel adam #adam the first man #character design #headcanon #adamsapple #wip

[fbj723]

what if,,,, hypothetically speaking,, i do a frame by frame analysis of the nocti v nigel cg,,, ahahaahaaaa,,,,,,

I AM GONNA PUT THIS HERE NOW THERE ARE SPOILERS FOR SANDS OF WRATH AND, OBVIOUSLY, SPOILERS FOR THE CG

i do recommend watching the cg first before reading all this since i will mention a lot about nocti and nigel's movements using timestamps for the vid since my storage hates me and i can't really properly add multiple clips 💔

!! LINK TO CG ANIMATION HERE !!

I WILL ALSO BE USING MTL FOR ALL THE DIALOGUE SO I'M VERY SORRY IN ADVANCED IF THE DIALOGUE IS INCORRECT TO WHAT IT ACTUALLY IS

from the get-go i will mention that before nocti entered this fight, skk had a m.i.n.d link with nocti. and since skk is poisoned, nocti is gonna feel the same over the time

aside from him coughing up vital fluid at 0:39, you can really see the poison start getting to him when he fights. starting from 0:14 you see nocti's movements getting slower and slower which becomes more obvious when you see him throw less punches/kicks and his reaction time worsening, allowing nigel to easily counterattack

callback to his last fight with nigel shown at the beginning of the chapter

ER05-01

i would also love to point out how nigel is such a good foil for nocti. from the opposing color schemes to their behavior. nigel having a black color scheme to fit with the whole idea that he is an assassin hiding in the shadows (which is an often recurrence of him throughout the story by either him watching nocti in the distance or showing up unexpectedly). black can also be associated with power and death, connecting to the fact that nigel carries such a strong poison to where there's no known cure, which allows nigel to easily control others to his bidding and/or make them suffer. as opposed to nocti having a white/vibrant red color scheme to fit how bold or loud he is. red can be associated with anger and white can be associated with purity/innocence so it fits with his personality too (since nocti is often left in the dark of a lot of situations back when he was in the purifying force)

ER05-08

around 0:46 - 0:57, 1:05, 1:18 - 1:33

essentially any part where nocti is heavily breathing

ER05-01 structure that this narrator is mentioning is nocti

this is probably leaning more into hc territory, but i think out of all the playable constructs we've met, nocti feels the most "human." he eats, drinks, sleeps, has breathing patterns that the narrator loves to point out, basically does a lot of human practices that constructs don't need to necessarily do, but he does it out of habit. he even believed at one point that constructs can get sick (obv they can't)

dialogue at 0:27

nigel: "you are still the same as before" nigel: "everything covered by anger" nocti: "nigel!!!!!" nigel: "you always thought my poison could only be attached to weapons, right?" nigel: "never doubted what i said"

callbacks to the last fight nocti had with nigel. when nocti was at his lowest, that's when nigel finally spoke. nigel alludes to nocti's naivety again, making nocti finally realize the poison wasn't contained in a separate attachment/weapon, rather nigel is the poison itself

ER05-12 nocti telling skk where the poison might be (remember at this time he still didn't know how nigel injects the poison, he just knows nigel has the ability to do so)

ER05-08 nigel pointing out nocti's naivety

the realization of where the poison's actually located, after the dialogue at 0:27

the location of the poison is more obvious in the reference sheet of nigel (since the ref removes the cloak he's wearing) (link to tweet about nigel that includes this ref)

callback to when nocti and skk first began to plan how to track down nigel after the rediscovery of nigel's poison

ER05-12

callback to him saying "leave everything to me" shown in the previous image.

the light in nocti's hands in the animation is skk (figuratively, not literally ofc LOL), having faith in him that he WILL beat nigel and will give him their all to help. though honestly, all he ever really needed was someone to trust him unconditionally

2:15 - end

"give that bastard a taste of our true wrath"

"partner"

the peak embracement of nocti and skk's partnership. this was the missing piece that he needed to finally beat nigel.

ever since the beginning of this chapter nocti has implicity or explicitly stated (whether it be through his first encounters with skk or in flashbacks of his hubris being in the purifying force/early days of cerberus) he prefers to work alone and leave it at that. he thought it'd benefit everyone if he didn't rope people into his mess, and he fully believed finding and confronting nigel again is something only he should burden

ER05-06 nocti and skk took turns asking for context of what's been going on

skk, cerberus, and the people of new oakley however say otherwise.

skk, in their words, "took a gamble" and just had a gut feeling to stick around and help him and even be down to consider him as a partner

ER05-05

ER05-06

it should probably be noted that skk saying they believe him "just because" carries a lot more weight than at first glance. having someone believe him without him really needing to prove himself with evidence makes nocti appreciate skk a lot more than when he first encountered them in EX05 or at the beginning of this chapter, showing that skk isn't like everyone else he's met and perhaps has a chance to be friends or more with them

ER05-11 first instance of nocti calling them partner

ER05-11 nocti "subtly" correcting vann with referring to skk as his partner

these screenshots can keep going on and on but you get the idea LOL they call each other partners from ER05-11 onwards.

21 and vera believe cerberus isn't complete without him

ER05-15 despite nocti technically being considered as a part of the purifying force at this time, vera and 21 will always believe he truly belongs in cerberus

and the people of new oakley see him as a brother/friend they could rely on and share a drink with

ER05-09 after nocti saves new oakley he gains a lot of respect from the people in town and they all decided to celebrate nocti's win

for most of his life he was practically feared or looked down upon by the people he was with 'cause of his loud and reckless demeanor, and to finally have that revelation that he IS wanted, needed, LOVED even, that people are able to put their trust and faith in him, that allows him to be the best version of himself he could ever ask for

am i looking too deep into this? probably

there's probably a lot of bias from that whole analysis i just love nocti ok—

i do wish we can see more of his backstory. he's one of the few that actively hide it (with the addition of vera not revealing it out of some respect for him), and i just wanna do a deep dive of how he became the way he is today. he's also one of the older constructs given his frame id (BPO-03), makes me wonder how or why he became a construct in the first place-

anyways, that's my rant for the month, ty for reading if you made it this far lol

have some love and a cookie you deserve it ❤🍪

#GODDAMN its been a while since ive done a deepdive like this #honestly i cooked this up out of pure boredom while i was in class and honestly idk if any of this made sense #just let me scream into the void abt nocti ok i love him WAY too much #fbj rambles #pgr #punishing gray raven #pgr noctis #战双帕弥什 #パニグレ

[abigail]

nooooo I’m so scared of my postman actually. like.. ok someone tell me if I’m being insane or if you’d be a bit freaked out too

ok so.. I moved into my new place in late spring time and since living there I’ve had a few different posties but recently this past like.. idk month or two I’ve mainly just had this one guy, I’d say he’s around 40-50 y/o.. at first he was just idk. normal lol ?? like didn’t say much just got on with his job etc. after a few times he’d start just.. commenting on stuff I guess ? like I’d answer the door in my pyjamas and he’d be like ‘oh hehe sorry for waking you up’ and idk.. ur a post man surely you’re greeted at the door of lots of people in pyjamas ??? (especially because it was like 8am on a saturday idk anyway). he then started saying my name a lot which.. he obviously knows from my mail, but he’d say ‘abi’ and I never get post with my nickname delivered so he just decided himself to use my nickname (which I find odd because.. personally I don’t really use a nickname for someone unless they tell me it’s their name or I hear other people using it or obvs if we’re close etc but maybe that’s just me !!)

then the other week I answered the door and he.. paused to hand over my mail.. to tell me he saw me by the charity shop in the main area of the town I live, I just said oh yeah they have good stuff sometimes and he just then asked if I work there ??? I said no … so he asked if I work around there.. I said no I work ‘in the city’ (the town I live in is like wedged in between two cities and I didn’t specify which one) and he just quietly repeated ‘in the city’ back to himself while handing me my mail ???? I told this to my friends and they agreed it was weird behaviour btw

so anyway.. with it being this time of year I’ve ordered more stuff online than usual because I’ve been buying christmas gifts and I’ve had a few friends mail me gifts for me so I’ve had to answer the door to him more frequently and idk each time he has something to say … like recently he said “oh that one looks interesting what’s in that” with a little smirky face and I’m like oh .. uh.. it’s a gift ????? like.. idk it’s just a bit weird considering the previous stuff ??? or is it just me ???

but yeah what caused me to write this is what just happened.. I’m waiting at the bus stop into the city and I see the post van drive past but then slow down.. it takes me a second to think oh shit is it him so I awkwardly turn to look away and then the van reverses back to the stop even slower until the window is in line with where I’m stood so I have no choice but to notice.. he shouts ‘abi’ and then asks what I want to do with this parcel he’s got in the back.. I’m like ??? uh.. my partner is home rn until midday or something ????? because well.. they are. and like he must know I have a partner because he would’ve seen their name on the mail he delivers and he probably has had my partner answer the door to him a few times too so idk why wouldn’t he think that like ???? and for him to recognise me while I’m at the bus stop and stuff ????? idk man it made me feel so yucky !!! anyway he asks then if I’m heading to work … I say yeah (so now he knows which city I work in ough) and he’s like hmm. ok see you soon and then does a full u turn to where I live .. I assume to deliver my mail but like.. surely he’s got a route he’s meant to follow like he was originally going in the opposite direction ???

yeah idk.. I might just be overthinking it like he’s probably harmless he just seems like some guy but considering it all and it’s the fact he obviously knows where I live because he’s my postie just makes me feel so…. idk. it creeps me out tbh like the vibes are off lmao

edit to add - also consider the fact the area I live in isn’t tiny like.. it’s not a city or whatever but there’s lots of houses and sure he’ll only be doing mail for one section of the town (I assume) but stillll he’ll be seeing so many people daily why is he always recognising me like. I’m not even wearing an outfit that makes me stand out today how did he instantly spot me.. ALSO the second I posted this I got an email saying my parcel was delivered so yeah he literally did do a u turn to my house to deliver my mail rather than do his normal route uhuhhhhhhhh…….. like thanks but ??? why am I getting special treatment lol

#long post under the cut lol sorry #also half way through I realised my phone kept autocorrecting parcel to pascal 😭 and I can’t be bothered to go back and edit it so sorry #a

[spicesweet]

Helloo, im looking for advice and your blog seems like a safe place but feel free to ignore if that's too much/out of your depth

So I never got diagnosed with an ed but I did ballet in my formative tears (4yo til 11) and as such I started 'caring' about my weight/stature very early (recently found journal entries from when I was 6 and I was measuring my waist every night). When I had my first smartphone I obv downloaded every 'health' app I could find (lifesum, movesum, whatever, I probably had it at one point), but after hs I got into a bad depressive episode but one of the upside is that I decided to eat what felt good and not just focus on random cals. Recently I decided to get back in shape and well, let's say that it started innocently but I ended with myfitnesspal back on my phone. And like. I'm trying again but just, how do you do it? Bc even when I wasn't counting cals I still categorised every meal into good or bad, I always planned what I was going to eat and like, is there a way to not center my life around food?

Sorry for the rant but I'm just so frustrated and sad with myself

Sending you love 💞

first of all, thank you so much for trusting me with this. this is in fact a safe space, and I'm glad it shows ♡

your message actually tugged at my heartstrings, because I relate to this so much! in one way or another, since I was a kid, I've orbited around food more than any other topic. even now, when I'm doing better than ever, I'm healthy and strong and honestly the closest I've ever been to my ideal, dream body, food is still something I'll spend a lot of time thinking about. disordered eating behaviors are hard to move on from exactly because food is central to our lives! it's the most basic need any animal has, regardless of what "food" means to that animal, and we're no different.

for me, I was tired. I spent my entire life loathing myself, feeling disgust and hatred that consumed me and at the same time paralyzed me, caused me to be unable to change. but life kept happening, and eventually I was in a completely new circumstance that allowed me to very slowly change my relationship with food. I have no shame in admitting that I don't know if it would've happened if I didn't have my man with me, because he made me want to do better, be better and healthier so I could stand proud next to him. I didn't want him to date a sick girl who would only have limitations to present him. but I do believe it would've happened eventually, just slower, maybe.

but to answer your actual question, how I do it, I think it's sort of like battling an addiction. you can't really ever take your foot off the pedal, relax and just think that if you get a little better, it'll be forever and you'll never have to worry about it coming back. I think having an eating disorder in your teens is so much harder because everything is impulsive, immediate, instant, including our expectations. now that I'm past that, I can understand that being extreme and hardcore doesn't last, but smaller actions add up. my commitment to myself and my health is a forever deal, and at the same time, I'm only concerned about today. I think my disordered eating behaviors are an addiction for me, because as much as I know how harmful they are, I also do find comfort in them. they do serve me, in lots of way, like addictive substances do. so I don't ever let my guard down around them, and I each day I wake up focused on keeping them away for the day. I don't bother with tomorrows and yesterdays, only today, only the next time.

and don't get me wrong: I still plan my meals ahead, I still get guilty often, I still regret eating this and that often. it's not a perfect system, and I think accepting and understanding that is also a part of the reason why I've been healthier. I'm not looking for a perfect lifestyle or a perfect relationship with food, but rather a sustainable one, and there's no room for obsession, self-loathing, impulsiveness and nonchalantry when it comes to sustainability. there's a lot of planning, watching out, discipline and understanding instead.

I think that if you identify disordered eating behaviors in your story, I think it's okay to understand that it is and will probably always be a big piece of your life, and even more okay that you'll have to treat this topic with special attention. I can't tell you how this special attention will go because that's literally a self-discovery problem, but it's about finding out what purpose the behaviors are serving and then finding a way to replace them with sustainable, flexible and accessible ones. you just need to investigate what these mean to you. to me, it means mainly a lot of reading about health and a lot of cooking and learning about nutrition and a lot of hours on top of a treadmill. eventually, if you're patient with yourself, embracing low moments but not giving up, not rushing your process, not expecting immediate results, I know you'll eventually find your healthy. ⁠♡

#loveletters #advice

[amygdalae]

you appeared on my dash with a bloodborne url so can i ask you how to defeat the orphan of kos

havent fought the orphan in awhile so im a lil rusty on specific tips but heres what i got:

dont give up! keep trying, i know it may seem unneccessary to say it but with bloodborne bosses its the most important part.

i recommend taking the fight out onto the water--its flatter than the beach and its easier to avoid his lightning attacks out there

He's weaker to physical and blood damage than elemental damage types, however any buff items like fire paper still add a lil damage and are therefore useful

focus first on observing his attack patterns to get your dodge timing down, thatll make it easier to know when you have an opening to do damage. also some of his attacks are easier to dodge depending on the direction you dodge in relative to him

faster weapons are generally a better idea, you'll need a lot of mobility and stamina. slower weapons still work of course but you'd have to play it a bit more patient and careful with those

it's all about the push and pull, try to close the distance if he backs too far away and try to overall stick to his left (your right) side. play bold but dont get greedy.

when he does his big jumping attack u can just run forward under it and youll be right in range for a backstab after he lands. backstabs and parries are very helpful--a lot of his attacks can be parried.

if you find yourself succumbing to despair or struggling with his attack timing, putting on some fun dance-able music you like can be a good motivator and help figure out timing. (obvs the game music is the best fit for the boss fight and putting on other music might make the experience less authentic, but if youre at your wits end a funny little morale boost can go a long way)

#hopefully some of this is helpful! good luck!

[chubbletea]

railroad wrath and it’s connection to the individual members of the phantom express

big rant/analysis incoming so beware

so for the first part (representing blind specter) there are lots of trumpets after the buildup and it sounds very upbeat but also keeps it's spooky vibe. since specter's entrance animation has them jumping out of the caboose and attempting to scare cuphead and mugman, I believe it suggests specter likes to wait to kind of jumpscare ppl which describes their entrance animation pretty well

specter's buildup/riff being slower + the trumpet representing train whistle at the start could mean the train was just starting up when cuphead and mugman got there

next riff! it gets a bit more intense (the riff get more intense/more detail as the song progresses)

this next part represents t-bone/the conductor (obv) is a little slow and less energetic. however, there is a big burst of trumpets/saxophone before it goes back to being slower. I think this would mean the conductor tends to handle things a bit more passively and calmly but he's easier to break which can cause him to be a bit more brash or perhaps even physically violent

this next riff is even MORE intense. it represents the lollipop ghouls and them being literally connected to the head of the train (pistons).

there is little buildup to the start of their part of the song and it doesn't last for very long, possibly representing how each ghoul has little hp and is quick & easy to defeat. it does have a short burst of trumpet however, then it gets slower to it's transition to the head of the train's part which starts with intense trumpet followed by cello shortly after

there isn't another riff to represent the head of the train, but there are many things that could suggest things abt him. the song kind of gets wavy in terms of being more or less intense/loud. I kind of see it as the song hinting towards "ooh the big boss oooohh you made him mad" WHICH I LIKE TO PUT TOWARDS MY FOUND FAMILY HC WITH HIM BEING THE DAD. BUT WE'RE STICKING TO CANON FOR NOW. there is an instrument (unsure what it is) that seems to represent a woman screaming, which I think could be connected to his inspiration yokai (oboroguruma?) which was first created by a lady being upset bc she lost a carriage fight over a nice parking space. I think the song slowing down a bit for the ending buildup represents the train getting ready to crash and it repeating the same thing after but louder and with more trumpets represents him fighting back to keep the train going

#phantom express #blind specter #the conductor #lollipop ghouls #blaze brothers #the head of the train #head of the train #cuphead #cuphead don't deal with the devil #🎮.txt

[neotrances]

omg your beyonce posting... she rlly is so great.... what would you rec if you wanna get started with her music???

ok gonna put this under a read more and also gonna try to condense this as much as possible bc her musician career spans actual decades like she’s been at this before i was even born but if you wanted to start getting into her music i obv recc the classics

i’m starting with the classics bc these are the most popular ones obv and a lot of her biggest songs are “feel good music” stuff you’d play to just dance to and usually for large groups, after im gonna work my way back to her pre solo debut !

starting with, LOVE ON TOP

this one is so fun and is from her “4” album released in 2011, two other songs that are a must see from this album are “countdown” and “dance for you”

following these, a must is her “Bday” album released in 2006, while i like all her albums to me personally bday has the MOST timeless hits in it

i posted a clip from “get me bodied” but i think this one should be watched first,

and following this “deja vu”

“ring the alarm” and “freakum dress” and “green light”

are my favorites from this album but ofcourse the entire album is a MUST, this album was actually partially inspired by her role in the movie “dreamgirls” (a movie that is a must see that she performed in) this album is heavily based in funk and hip hop, most of her music or rather singing style is heavily influenced by southern black culture and old school r&b, and jazz!

her 2016 “lemonade” album speaks for itself, this one you absolutely need to watch in order from beginning to end with the mvs bc it is quite literally a movie made with just music and her original poetry

now back to her solo debut album ! released in 2003 her “dangerously in love” album made history with cementing beyonce as a stand alone singer, this album skyrocketed her to be one of the most marketable black singers in the game… EVER, while beyoncé was already a icon in black households and the black community bc of her participation in destiny’s child her solo debut resulted in a massive shift in the music industry toward black artistry and music in more “mainstream” (white) spaces, im gonna avoid going into detail of her long history in the music field bc this is simply for you to see some of her greatest work so i’ll spare the lesson!

anyways nowww onto destiny’s child, beyonce was essentially the leader in this girl group made up of her, kelly rowland, and michelle williams, the group formed around the 1990s, while all the girls in this group were incredibly talented, beyonces drive and slightly obsessive work ethic helped the group truly explode jn the music world, there was actually a fourth member in destiny’s child but i will spare the details and just say…she could not keep up with the other girls and there were rumors of fights between the group bc of this fourth member not singing as well as the others…..anyways ! the 2004 album “destiny fulfilled” is a must see, hit after hit !

“is she the reason” is my favorite from this album

and even though “lose my breath” and “soldier” were more popular (and for good reason both amazing songs) “is she the reason” just really shows off her voice beautifully, i really prefer the songs where you can hear her voice raw, while i love party songs her voice is way better appreciated in songs that are a bit slower and let her really go full out, another song on that album that shows this off is “girl” she leads most of the song beautifully

the 2001 album “survivor” is another really strong album from her girl group days, “the story of beauty” is a really important song to me, tw for csa but the song revolves around sexual abuse being hidden / ignored within the black community and is a ode to victims who grow up damaged because of it

these are just a few reccs but if you want any specific concerts or other picks of my fav songs lmk! her career has wayyyyy too much content to be reduced to just this and she’s one of my favorite artist ever so feel free to ask anything else ^_^ also with all the songs i reccd i HEAVILY recc watching the music videos with these, the music is good enough in its own but the videos are all iconic ! also thanks for the ask!!

#yonce #✉️

[melrosing]

Favorite POVs/books in order?

books is easy:

A Feast for Crows bc of my severe Jaime/Brienne/Cersei bias obvs. Their POVs are like half this entire book if not more. GRRM wrote this book for me specifically

A Storm of Swords because firstly GRRM is killing it here with Jaime’s POVs but also just what’s not to like about ASOS. it’s got it all

A Clash of Kings I think old acok gets neglected even more so than AFFC these days honestly but I like it a lot. I think a lot of characters really come into their own here, esp Tyrion and Catelyn, and Sansa most of all. Plus I’m living for the KL a drama and also hello Brienne! And of course a shout out to Jaime’s salty bastard man monologue

A Game of Thrones - I love the slow build and the calm before the storm of it all and just the DREAD you get as a re-reader I am Walter white screaming from inside the car

A Dance With Dragons - no shade because ADWD has so much going for it like the climax of Dany’s arc + the intro of Joncon’s POV + Bran’s chapters in this volume are some of my faves buuut yeah I do find many of ADWD’s chapters slower going. I keep meaning to try out a combined order to break some of ADWD's acts up a bit with AFFC's but I can't lie I just really the binge of J/B/C in AFFC soooo

POVs in this order (though if I were to do by each book it would probably vary a little, and also the order I like the POVs isn't really the order I like the characters themselves necessarily... except the top three obvs):

Jaime Brienne Cersei Sansa Bran Catelyn Arya Dany Theon Tyrion Arianne Ned Jon Sam Asha Joncon Davos Aeron Quentyn Areo Victarion Melisandre Barristan Arys

#ask

[sumbier0]

would you rather fight twenty normal sized chickens or a twenty-chicken-sized one. (in case u get picky that would be a six feet tall chicken, according to my calculations, considering each chicken was one feet tall ((simplified for obv reasons)), and also considering the chicken´s shape, we would have half-a-cube, slightly chubbier on the sides, so we´d assume it would have this shape->

O OOO OOOOO

Now, here we can see 9 chickens, but, if we escaled the chicken, it would still be chubby, meaning not only his height but also his width would be altered. Therefore, we can duplicate the previously mentioned structure to get our anatomically sized chicken. And the remaining chicken will be where the legs would be.)

(in case you get pickier, a normal chicken would go at 9 mph, while, the huge chicken, being bigger, would be slower. Probably at 3mph or something, I am not sure.)

(another factor to consider is the chicken´s peck. a normal chicken peck is of around 7 N, while the huge chicken´s would be much bigger. doing some research, i came to the conclusion that the huge chicken´s peck force would be of around 200 N, similar to the snapping turtle´s, since, considering the size n everthing, they have similar beak/mouth ((no teeth, alike structure)), therefore it´d make sense if they had alike force. keep in mind that the chicken´s beak was not adapted for biting, so its force would be slightly lower, cuz its mussles n such wouldnt be as strong as the snapping turtle's. therefore, i would say that the huge chicken's bite force would be of around 100 N)

anyway who would u fight

Twenty normal sized chickens I will simply first round them up in one place and get rid of them one by one. Big chicken would easily harm me and I bet I wouldnt have even much of a chance to touch it

Also wow you out a lot of wfgort into the big chicken [awesome]

#askb

[hereforyourdispleasure]

I love Dani so much I'm sorry you've had like 1 scene queen. Anyway random information about Dani I've come up with at 2am

-born 1910s, joined Commission in late 1930s

-lesbian, got engaged to a guy for convenience but obviously skipped town to work for Comms

-American, w/ slight country accent (contemplated transatlantic but she's too 💪 for that)

-specialised in field work, did a lot of personal errand running for higher ups too

-very big on the idea of revolution, and either completely altering Comms or taking it down

-above point is kind of why she was given Darian to train. She was getting a lot of information and starting to properly organise things, but then boom you got a child to train (which ended up just making Darian carry on her plans but-)

-also big on the idea of trying to maintain a normal life- not relying on briefcases where possible, doing lots of stuff outside of work

-taught Darian how to fly aircraft, with him getting his license either briefly before she died or when he was back from the Reality Project incident at 21 (haven't fully decided yet)

-very proud owner of a collection of old revolvers, would've collected motorbikes too if she had a permanent living condition

-got Darian into older music (not that he wasn't already, considering he's a 60s kid, but obv he wasn't into the slower songs Dani was) mainly Doris Day, and Jack Hylton (mentioned in a post ages ago)

-definitely where Darian got a lot of his sense of humour from. She's the same style of sarcastic little shit who makes fun of authority. But she didn't go as all in considering she didn't generally want her life on the line

-mentioned at the Liraz death, but basically flat out refused to hand Darian over to be employed in the Reality Project, this went on for quite a bit with her having to try and juggle keeping Handler away, keeping her already at risk career, and raising a kid. Which all boiled down to a threat being sent to Darian, to kill Dani, but Dani intercepting it and getting the job done herself (obv there wasn't really any other way out, I just cba to explain it all 💔)

-which all went to shit though because Darian ended up being dragged in anyway YAYYYYY

#Plus she's so pretty I can't lie #She is astonishing #Those faceclaims? Dayum #dani talk

[theloveinc]

thoughts on “i’m glad my mom died” by JM (it being the first memoir I’ve ever read). I wanted to do a more formal analysis but then I got about halfway through and my thoughts became a lot more disorganized… so here are some bullet points

Overall, a very engaging + interesting read. I wouldn’t necessarily call it funny or “witty” so much as… ironic, or spoken with an odd, knowing voice. But it was really good and I fully recommend it to a wide audience

I actually liked the way this was presented, but in the chapters detailing her childhood, McCurdy spoke w/ a very adult voice despite it being from the perspective of her as a six year-old. I thought this (very smartly) touched upon how children being abused are forced to grow up way too early at the same time it showed how she didn’t understand this until recently. Great narration because of it

Much of the detailing of her abuse read as such, too… forcing you, as the reader, to analyze situation as young McCurdy “went” through it (it was present tense). I thought this was both… good and bad, as I understood things easily but could see how someone more unfamiliar with psychology or abuse might lose some of the nuance in how it wasn’t fed to you

Similarly… I also thought the book could’ve been… twice as long. She definitely skipped over a lot of the action, instead focusing more on the buildups + supporting details of situations rather than the go throughs and ends to them (such as what it was like to film iCarly), which I thought was fine despite how I also would’ve happily sat through even more if was provided

She did talk about her relationship with Miranda Cosgrove and Ariana Grande… but somewhat briefly. Cosgrove more so, Nathan Cress literally once. And Grande was criticized but in a very self reflective way (“I was jealous”). The rest of iCarly though? Not at all. But Dan Schneider (“The Creator”) was mentioned throughout… kind of

I also think… McCurdy’s life was absolute TORTURE. Hands down. But the media put way too much emphasis on her mother giving her full body exams til she was 17 and the like. That was like, literally one (2.5 page) chapter and one sentence worth of material. There were other parts equally as gripping and odd (like the fact that her older brother was sometimes forced to shower with her, too)

It took me a pretty long time to get through, though. Approx. 305 pages and it took me……… seven and a half hours in total? When something less… interesting (for lack of a better word) would’ve maybe taken me four (and I have pretty average if not. Slower-ish reading speed)

But I also had nothing to do today… so I can’t really comment on how long it would take in increments given… I really pushed myself to read it all in one sitting. There were def parts where I thought, “oh okay, I could take a break here and wouldn’t pick it up immediately”

I’m trying to think what else… the book is split into two main parts, “before” which is before her mom’s death and focuses on her early acting career, and “after,” on her struggle with EDs, addiction, dating and recovery. Obvs the topics switched, so I can’t fairly say which part I enjoyed more… but the end had many surprises and was a lot faster paced

And though there were some parts that lost me OR were mentioned but deliberately kept sparse (her brothers, her sex life, her interest in writing)… I thought it was overall an excellent read. Especially for former fans of iCarly!!!

#I had a bad day today :( #so I just read all my problems away #I never know how long it should take me to get thru something #but I feel like this went slow #super fascinating tho and her mom was a real … nutcase #idk #caitie blabs