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eddiexfreakxmunson · 2 years

Text

Title: Confession

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Reader

Genre: fluff, angst if you squint at the end

Word count: 2,033

TW: smoking, drugs (marijuana), cussing

"Do you think there's anyone up there?"

You stared up at the dark night sky, stars twinkling above you, the damp grass no doubt leaving stains on your shirt below you.

Eddie coughed, blowing smoke into the air above him. "Fuck, is this shit that strong?" he joked, passing the joint back to you as you rolled your eyes.

"Shut up. I'm serious." you huffed, silent for a beat as you took a drag, smoke filling your lungs before you exhaled through your nose, the stinging feeling bringing a certain sense of familiar comfort. "I'm not asking if God is real or anything, just.." you trailed off with a sigh, shaking your head. "Forget it. It was stupid."

Eddie shifted beside you, lifting himself onto one elbow as he rolled onto his side to face you, staring at you through the dark. "No, come on, I wanna know," he coaxed, big brown eyes wide as he pouted.

You sighed, squashing down the butterflies that awoke in your stomach when he looked at you like that. "Sometimes, I just wonder if there's someone up there watching. Wishing we'd just enjoy the ride and not worry about the future so much," you admitted, the words sounding silly now that you were saying them out loud.

Eddie was quiet, reaching over to gently take back his joint, pressing it between his lips and taking a deep breath before replying. "Is this because I said I couldn't wait to get out of this town?" he asked finally, smoke falling from his lips as he spoke.

You shook your head, your gaze fixated on the stars above you, mentally tracing constellations you'd spent the better half of the last two years finding and memorizing with Eddie.

"Not really. Well, kinda," you admitted finally. "I just- I don't know. Things just seem alright this year. Like, whatever happens, will turn out okay, yknow? It hasn't felt like that in a while. I guess I just thought you were feeling the same way." you pressed, picking up a blade of grass and twisting it around your fingers.

Silence settled between the two of you as he inhaled again before passing the joint back, and you hated the way the brush of his fingertips against yours felt like electricity shooting through your system.

"I'm not saying it's bad to want to leave." You broke the silence again, nervousness making your tongue looser. "I just don't get why everyone has to complicate things. I like the way things have been lately. It's been peaceful. Chill. Why make things harder than they have to be?" you rambled, pausing only to inhale again, your head fuzzy. "I mean, life is gonna kick the shit out of us eventually; why rush towards that?"

"Jesus Christ, I forget how chatty you get when you're high," Eddie interrupted with a quiet chuckle, hand encircling yours to pull the joint towards himself, his lips brushing your fingers as he inhaled deeply before gently taking it from you.

You watched, eyelids significantly heavier than they'd been a moment ago, kicking yourself for how entranced you were with how his mouth moved when he exhaled into the air, watching the smoke swirl above him before it disappeared.

"I like hanging out with you too, yknow," he admitted quietly, studying the embers flickering on the joint as he spoke, lifting one arm to rest beneath his curls. "It's not you that I'm eager to leave behind."

You swallowed thickly, turning to face him, waiting for him to continue. He tilted his head towards you slightly, his gaze softening when it met you, and you didn't miss the way his eyes dropped down to your lips before flicking back up.

You knew this dance too well. There had always been this tension between the two of you. One of you would take a chance and hint at their feelings, and the other would pretend they had no clue what you meant, more willing to be ignorant than admit there might be something worth exploring. More often than not, you found it was you taking that chance and him pretending he had no clue what you might mean.

But tonight felt different. Eddie had never really been one to be exceptionally forward; the closest you'd gotten was when he'd watched you sneak out of the bathroom with one of the basketball players on Prom night, swiping a napkin over your chin to wipe away your smeared lipstick. You'd watched his face crumple from across the hall when your gaze met his. He'd certainly never looked at you the way he did now. At least not when you could see.

He leaned towards you, fingertips brushing over your skin as he moved your hair out of your face, his thumb smoothing over your cheek, lingering longer than any friend should have. Your heart sped up as he visibly swallowed, closing the distance some more, and you swore time slowed down. After four long years of dancing around one another, you would finally know if there was something between you and Eddie and what those pretty lips felt like against your own.

And then he pulled away. He shook his head slightly, sitting up and waving the end of the joint in your direction. "You wanna finish this off?" he offered, avoiding your gaze.

You could feel your heart sink, and your bottom lip trembled for a moment before you sucked in a breath, shaking your head. You would not cry in front of Eddie Munson over not being kissed. You weren't a child.

He nodded, taking one last drag before putting out the remnants of the joint on the bottom of his shoe, focused on making sure no embers were left.

Silence settled over the two of you again as he leaned back once more, and you could feel his gaze burning into you as you stared straight up, pretending to be immersed in star-gazing.

"I meant what I said. I'm gonna miss this," Eddie murmured, quiet enough that you almost didn't hear. Your gaze flicked towards his momentarily before it returned to the stars. You weren't trying to ice him out, but you could only take so much false hope from him before you had to start protecting yourself.

"I'm gonna miss you," Eddie spoke again, his voice firmer this time, and you glanced over in surprise, his own gaze now focused on the stars. You bit your lip, reaching out a hand to brush over his, hesitating for a moment.

He took advantage of your pause, intertwining his fingers with yours and giving a gentle squeeze, his eyes fluttering closed.

You followed suit, letting yourself pretend for just a moment that you weren't simply holding your best friend's hand like you had so many times before, but rather, it was more than that. There was no harm in pretending, right?

Except that there was. Cause when Eddie finally pulled away, and he would pull away, he'd give you that stupid, beautiful grin and make some stupid joke that would cut you to your core, and you'd have to laugh it off as if the mere sight of him didn't make your pulse race. You could feel tears springing in the back of your eyes, and you furrowed your brow, willing them away.

"Hey," you peeled your eyes open at Eddie's quiet words, surprised to see him staring at you intently, something new and unreadable burning in his doe eyes as he searched your face.

"Fuck it," he muttered, and then he was rolling over, careful to keep his hand intertwined with yours as the other landed on your hip as he hovered above you. You barely had time to think before his mouth met yours softly, his curls falling down around his face as he kissed you.

You reacted on instinct, relief crashing over you at the feeling of his body draped over you, his soft lips molded over yours. You reached up to grip the rough denim of his jacket, holding him close as his thumb rubbed soothing circles on your hip. You'd been close to him before, knew exactly what cologne he used, but this was different. He smelled like ash and smoke but also worn leather and wood beneath it all, and you found yourself thinking that, just maybe, that was what home smelled like.

He was the first to pull away, cheeks flushed and chest rising and falling rapidly. "I'm sorry, I had to know at least once, pretty girl, couldn't just-" he began, moving to sit up and away from you.

He stopped short when you reached up, cupping his cheek in your palm, eyes wide as you propped yourself up onto your elbow to kiss him again, firmer this time but just as slow. His mouth quirked up into a smile against yours as he leaned into it, his hand leaving your waist to cup the back of your neck.

He angled your head to kiss you deeper, his tongue swiping over your bottom lip, silently asking for permission. You granted it happily, lips parting to allow him access as his tongue swiped against yours, nails scratching against your scalp.

You hummed into his mouth but flattened your palms against his chest, pushing him away just enough to press your forehead into his, the need for air forcing you away from him.

"Shit," he cursed, chuckling softly, and you glanced up, worry flooding your veins as he cupped your face, running his thumb over your bottom lip as he spoke. "Never gonna be able to stop kissing you now, princess," he admitted, a sheepish smile gracing his features.

You breathed a sigh of relief, pressing a kiss to his jaw. "Sounds good to me, Munson," you laughed softly, heart feeling like it would jump out of your chest at any second, warmth filling your veins as he settled down next to you, tugging you into his side and re-intertwining your fingers, his rings pressing into your skin.

"Can't believe I waited four years to do that," he laughed softly, his chest rumbling beneath your hands. "I'm a fucking idiot, aren't I?"

You snorted, hooking a leg over his waist, hiding your smile when his other hand automatically fell to it, rubbing more circles against your skin. "Yeah, kinda," you teased, giggling when he clutched his heart dramatically with his hand still intertwined with yours.

"You wound me, m'lady." he feigned hurt, a grin breaking out over his face when you craned your neck back to press another sweet kiss against his mouth, his gaze warm when you pulled away.

"I could definitely get used to that," he hummed happily, settling his cheek against the top of your head as you both stared up at the stars once more. You hummed in agreement, a comfortable quiet settling over the two of you, and you found your eyes drifting closed.

"Does this mean I can hold your hand in school now? This wasn't just some high makeout, right?" he asked suddenly, and you became acutely aware of his heart hammering in his chest beneath your cheek. You twisted to look up at him, smiling reassuredly.

"You can hold my hand whenever you want, Munson. I didn't need to be high for you to kiss me," you assured, bringing his knuckles up to your mouth and pressing a soft kiss to it. Relief flooded his features, and he let out a deep breath, nodding slightly.

"Come over after your shift at work tomorrow?" he asked, and you nodded, pressing closer to his side and missing the wide grin that split his face as he watched you, arms tightening around you. "I've gotta meet with Chrissy Cunningham for a deal, but after that, I'm all yours." he pressed a kiss to the top of your head as he finished, and you hummed in agreement, his warmth coaxing you to sleep.

You smiled softly as his fingers rubbed over your skin, eyes fluttering shut.

It didn't matter what came next. Cause right now, Eddie was here with you. And maybe that's all you needed. Everything else would work itself out, right?

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