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#gordon agrippa
worldtreeason · 4 months ago
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Okay we've had "Finral is Yami's taxi" but have you heard of:
Zora being the Black Bulls' vermin exterminator, putting up traps around the hideout for rats and shit
Asta being the anti magic dude who has to clean up the traps around the hideout that clearly have been placed there with the intention of trapping a human (thanks Zora), half of which he accidentally steps in
Vanessa using her thread magic to make Yami clothes when he didn't do his laundry and nobody else did his laundry for him
Yami sending Grey disguised as him to boring meetings and mundane tasks he's too lazy to attend
Yami putting an egg in a pan and being like "turn on the stove" and it's just Magna setting his arms on fire
Letting Charmy cook him food
Noelle being in charge of flushing the toilet with her water magic if it's ever broken
Henry shifting the building around so Yami doesn't have to walk that far from one room to the other
Gordon talking him to sleep because it's so quiet and he can't hear what he's saying anyway but he's a soothing ASMR
Gauche making mirrors for Yami when he's shaving
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the-black-bulls · 3 months ago
Conversation
Noelle: Apparently, the 'bad vibes' I've been feeling are actually 'severe psychological distress'.
The Black Bulls: Mood.
Asta: What does this mean?
Nacht: Well it mea—
Nero: Trauma.
Henry: Anxiety.
Grey: Panic.
Finral: Stress.
Magna: Insecurity.
Gordon: Loneliness.
Vanessa: Emptiness.
Luck: Meltdown.
Gauche: Breakdown.
Zora: Depression.
Noelle: ... and more, really.
Yami: In other words, this squad.
Nacht: What's wrong with you people?
Asta: Wait, what about Charmy?
Charmy: I'm the therapist here, Asta.
Nacht: Excuse me?!
Yami: She eats people though.
Nacht: EXCUSE ME?!
Charmy: Shut up and let's start your first therapy session, Mr. Vice Captain. I have food and cotton and five years of experience, you can't be worse than Gauche or Luck.
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zenon-zogratis · 3 years ago
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Black Bulls squad members
Charmy, Luck, Vanessa: *looks like a cinnamon roll but could actually kill you*
Magna, Gordon, and Grey: *looks like they could kill you but is actually a cinnamon roll*
Finral, Henry, Noelle, and Asta: *looks like a cinnamon roll and is a cinnamon roll*
Gauche, Zora, and Yami: *looks like they could kill you and will kill you*
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iluvluvnutella · 2 years ago
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the rest after searching a cure for Asta! 😆
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the-black-bulls · 6 months ago
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Asta: It’s Christmas time, you know what that means!
Nero: Seasonal depression?
Noelle: The happiness I haven’t felt for 15 years?
Luck: The sweet release of blood and death?
Zora: Another year to prove Santa doesn't exist?
Magna: The fact that I will only get coal from Santa?
Gordon: My annual reminder that I'm creepy and lonely?
Grey: Getting drunk on my own while crying in the bathtub?
Finral: Collapsing on the kitchen floor from pure exhaustion?
Charmy: Everyone trying to kill each other at the dinner table?
Gauche: Time to get revenge on the fuckers who ruined my life?
Vanessa: Time to share our tragic memories and laugh at them?
Henry: I... don’t know... this is my first time celebrating Christmas.
Asta: 
Asta: 
Asta: 
Yami: He was actually going to say “ugly Christmas sweater competition” but you know what?
Yami: You’re going to therapy, all of you, now.
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blackbullsquadquotes · a year ago
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Julius: All magic knights, gather for a meeting.
Finral: I’ve sprained my ankle.
Kahono: I’ve lost my voice.
Mimosa: I’ve hurt my hand.
Klaus: I’m seeing double.
Vanessa: I’ve got a hangover.
Gordon: I’ve got an earache.
Kiato: I cut my finger.
Luck: There’s a power cut.
Sekke: My car broke down.
Charmy: The kitchen’s flooded.
Gauche: My sister’s been kidnapped.
Leopold: The army’s closed off the street.
Mereoleona: My house has blown down.
Lily: The vestry’s on fire.
Walter: Our captain was struck by lightning.
Noelle: My brother’s gone crazy.
Yami: I’m just staying in all day.
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