Holy shit guys so many times the Firbolg looks directly at Fitzroy and is just like, you are the closest bond I have, I trust you implicitly even when I cant trust my own mind
And Fitzroy who is by this point deep into his paranoia and makes an art of keeping people at arms length in the first place offers Master Firbolg this unwavering trust despite the fact that mere minutes before he didn't know if the feeling was at all mutual
Sorry they got me feeling insane
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fitzroy “yeah, just had a weird premonition of the future. you proposed to me and that was weird. I didn’t mean to bring that up. anyway can I meet your dad. no not like that I need him for my army” maplecourt
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physically im here but mentally im still in the era when maplekeene was popular
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When one of the gang refers to The Firbolg with they or it pronouns my gender starts rattling like a dog in a kennel who just heard your keys in the lock
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a love letter to my favorite YA lit:
I'm relistening to the Beka Cooper audio books again (a yearly tradition at this point) and every time I hear the opening line of Mastiff, "We buried Holborn today," it takes me back to opening the e-book on my Nook the day it was released in my freshman year of high school and reading that line while sitting on the bleachers waiting for PE to start. I remember flipping back to the previous page to make sure this was the first chapter, thinking I'd never even heard of Holborn. I opened the Bloodhound e-book to compare the dates of her entries and realized the time skip was nearly two years, and got so excited to see what happened to Beka while we weren't with her. We walked the track that overcast day of PE in 2011 and I barely looked up from my Nook, so engrossed was I in Beka's story
that was the first Tamora Pierce book release I waited on; I found her books in probably 2009 and had read most of them by the summer of 2011. I pre-ordered Mastiff so it would be on my Nook as soon as it came out, but I was a freshman in high school and wasn't supposed to stay up till midnight, so I had to wait until the day to read it. it was nearly 13 years (and half my life ago) but here I am, still re-reading and re-listening to the Tamora Pierce books that got me through being a teenager. I remember sitting in my high school's library rereading their copy of Wild Magic over my lunch break to pass the time; drunk crying on the floor of my friend's dorm at a character's death in Terrier my freshman year of college (even though I'd read it 3 or 4 times at that point I always forgot); waiting in the lobby of the technology building of my college campus for my class to start with Spy's Guide on my lap after its release; sitting in my advisor's office in grad school flipping through Mastiff and Page and Lioness Rampant for quotes to include in my thesis; rereading Briar's book at the height of the pandemic. I have a tattoo of Lighting on my arm and a (very rough and needs to be redone) tattoo of Pounce/Faithful on my calf and I genuinely don't think a day has gone by in over a decade where I haven't thought about Tamora Pierce books
the world of Tortall (and Emelan, to a lesser extent) has shaped me, and although this is an attempt to pin it down, I will never be able to explain how much these books mean to me. I know that I may love other series and worlds (I'm currently reading some Terry Pratchett, for example), but they will never make an impact on me in the same way that Tortall and all its various characters has, and that's fine by me
and yet, through all of it, I will never, ever be ready for The Thing We Don't Talk About in Mastiff, not now at a dozen rereads and not in another 13 years
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Fitzroy when Chaos approaches him and tells him to tap into his chaotic side: “sorry dude, I’m not interested in hurting people, I’m a good guy. find a new puppet bc I am OUT”
Fitzroy, not even ten minutes later: rips off a dude’s hand without hesitation, threatens to do the same to any of the centaurs if they cross him, intimidates the now-handless dude into confessing his entire plot to the centaur camp by waving his severed hand in front of him
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i was being a little wishy washy about doing a taz grad relisten but i ordered 3 mystery pins from mcelroy merch and i got them today and two of them are taz grad pins…..this is a sign
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