#have a ramble about izzy (again)

[kijosakka]

Thoughts. okay so the total drama drama drama drama island special is interesting mainly bc of team e-scope but im going to take a moment here to ramble about his dynamic with other people here,,

(oh and i didn't have anywhere really to slot it into the other post or segue into it here but dodgebrawl as a Moment demonstrates how [this AU] noah can play the social game, just in a very very different way than how it's normally seen.

he knows what he's doing is going to bother his team and incentivize them to vote, i'd say in this au he even plays up the cockiness and makes veiled personal slights against specific people

(mainly those who would be annoyed enough to vote him off, see: heather, justin, leshawna, cody/trent to some extent if he said smth about gwen? < and gwen herself in that scenario. and to another extent beth, since hes playing up his outright mean traits, which would make lindsay vote with her. i dont think he would do anything specific to/with owen or izzy, since he may see izzy as too volatile and owen too genuine)

in the opposite way of whats expected, sure, but it is a social play. he can pick apart what these people are and what they show and push at it to achieve his own ends (and maybe its even some sort of way for him to regain control in this fundamentally uncontrollable situation he's found himself in; he can be the punishment in foucalt's imagining, to a much smaller degree))

so his teammates,,, do not like him tbh. his flagrant display during dodgeball and everyone being pissed at him after the fact is true in this AU, just coming with different motivations. even after the fact when the frustration of everyone fizzles out, hes still majorly offputting because of his detachedness, and deliberately makes his shown traits very unpalatable to experience in person combined with that.

the only two exceptions are izzy and owen respectively: owens mostly coming from a place of genuineness and im going to say while he wouldnt be able to verbalize it, in some manner owen would clock noahs behavior as a defense mechanism. maybe in the sense of 'hes just scared to open up to people!!' or something similar, but he definitely has a lot more faith that noah really isnt that cold and flat.

[*]izzy feels much the same -- except maybe it comes off more to her as strategic. izzy can act, and might recognize that in noah. if you wanted to you could write this in as to why she was eager to swap teams in the first episode, but it wouldnt change that he does get eliminated and thats all she sees of him until the special -- which, her intrigue in his lacking and the fact that it apparently wasnt strategic to get him further in the game, could help explain why she picks him in the team-up.

[*i have soooo much to say about izzy in this au actually. but ill save it for a diff post]

and speaking of the team-up: team e-scope!!!! :0

my au my rules eva and izzy became really good friends on the playa; izzy isn't afraid of eva (and curbing her anger before it reaches a boiling point) and eva is physically adept enough to restrain izzy from Shenanigans that might be a little Much. but eva doesnt really?? know anything about noah?? but izzy insists on teaming with him for the special (and unbeknownst to her noah wasnt even planning to participate initially) so he must be some level of Not Too Bad if izzy wants anything to do with him that doesnt seem to be related to tormenting the guy

and she thinks hes Fine. apathetic and detached and unpalatable (but then again, everyone in their little trio really is to some degree), but can kind of understand izzys intrigue: hes still A Guy, hes just hidden behind 20 layers of non-substance that are so offputting from the first meeting it makes people steer clear of him.

now with tddddi comes two other pertinent details: the justin line, and the Thing With Duncan.

i personally thing noahs 'he's the anti-me' line is really funny in the context of canon but if you squint it kinda works here? wherein justin is non-speaking yet flaunts himself to be the center of attention and clearly shows intent and capacity to scheme (underdeveloped or no, see: awakeathon), whereas noah speaks a lot yet lets himself fade into the background, showing vague hints of the capacity to scheme but no intention or palpable ambition behind it.

^ am i reaching? maybe. the other option here is noah somehow has seen him in-person before on a modeling or red carpet kind of gig and dislikes him on principle because of it/its a jab at it (smth smth they are both opposite ends of the same industry? justin is the face of it in a manner where noah stays behind the scenes and out of sight)

and the thing with duncan,, hear me out here okay noah does his whole song and dance, goes up to him and patronizes him, and duncan retaliates. however, he curses like a sailor and in noah's head has ruined the footage, therefore instead of further retaliating and potentially invoking actual physical harm he just. doesnt react. at all. duncan looks up at him and hes just dead-eyed staring down at him -- and then he leaves.

^ the scene has been ruined, and everyone else is doing so much that theres no reason to play it up any more. duncan and him arent plot important like how heather and lindsay were, theres no reason for the crew to painstakingly edit his swearing out. they just wont let it reach the final cut. duncan is understandably very confused by this, but at that point noah was already gone to find eva and izzy again (< this is when the cast having a running bet that noahs and android becomes Not a Joke)

but life goes on!!! and in the worlds worst comedy of errors (for noah), izzy ends up dragging him along into the lake, thereby leaving him as a confirmed member of the next season.

^ noah is so angry at this. popping blood vessels. he argues with chris endlessly, straight frothing at the mouth at only having two days of real reprieve before he has to deal with the Same Shit again. and chris gets this, to some degree, but also knows that if theres no explanation for noahs non-appearance to hand the producers, theyll be pissed (since all things considered, noahs pretty damn popular among the fans)

luckily for him, courtney just filed a lawsuit against the show!! and since chris is busy running said show, the producers do not want to deal with it and are willing to hand off the case to anyone else -- hence, chris officially signs noah on as his PA, and noah takes over the court settlements and whatnot.

< though i do imagine the producers would see it as a 'get out of the show' scheme, and thereby push way harder for his involvement in WT as a result

but noah does get a break!!! for now, at least.

#formal thanks to ophe for the cast having a running joke about him being an android #that was Not my idea #before-bed rambling. again #wrote this post eating a sleeve of saltines it was an Experience #soooooo much to say about izzy and her dynamic with noah. sososososo much #is the justin thing reaching? yeah probably idc #character analysis #total drama #td noah #dramaturgyAU #if someone wants to takw this idea and run go ahead im begging someone to share my fascination for the concept of panopticon

[arsenicflame]

when will someone pick izzy up bridal style and spin him around? hm?

#it Would upset his tummy but i think he deserves a little holding. as a treat #to be cradled. and spun around with joy #(honestly to me i see this only working as bellhands i dont think izzy would let anyone else get away with it- maybe ed but. thin thin ice- #and i see izzy being too stressed about eds knee to get to unbridled laughter. so sam . hes just appeared; for the first time in a long #time. he sees izzy [they have a little reunion (depending on ~circumstances~ that could just be yelling affectionately at each other like #hey i haven't seen u in a year- or if its after faking his death i see sam getting punched. just a little) they get to kiss a bit etc etc] #then sam just. sweeps him up in his arms. izzy yells in shock and demands sam puts him down but sam just. holds him tighter and #spins him around in pure joy. and izzy laughs #(this; more than anything shocks the crew. they thought the rest of it was shocking- sam bellamy likes izzy???? theyre married??? #people think positively about this man they all hate???? wtf wtf. izzy punched sam and got away with it?? the prince of pirates????? #but then izzy is laughing. and theyre astounded. they didn't think he was capable of that. maybe they never knew him at all) #djjdhdhdj ive been. thinking about this. A LOT. today so here #have a ramble about izzy (again) #if izzy not for cradling like lover; why small? #nyxtalks #ofmd #israel hands #izzy hands #bellhands #sam bellamy #i think i went off enough in the tags to quantify those fjdjnd

[peridots-pixiwolf]

[Start ID. A drawing of @mieczmaszyna 's character Izzy. In the words of its creator, Izzy is a humanoid robot with a white chassis, oval head, black headset, square green glasses, claws, and a tail resembling a cable plug. Ai wears a cowboy hat, vest decorated by a star and bottle cap, pants with tassels, spurred boots, and a red bandanna. He's viewed from the side, kicking up one leg and holding both arms out in front of itself to shoot finger guns, looking excited and rather jaunty. The background is a dull yellow-green, muddied by the warm reddish tone of the drawing, and in paler green are the words "BANG BANG!!" by ais arms. End ID]

robot cowboy!!!

#peridots-art #bots #others' ocs #izzy #mieczmaszyna #gotta admit doing all the shading here was. very fun. insert medic hoo noise #i don't know if people usually read these but @ the intended recipient of this post! if you are!! #i remember first liking your art a year ago (actually only about a week off now lol) when it crossed my dash for the first (/only) time #and then found it again whilst enjoying the funky robot dudes (yesm/p03) and their respective games and I fell in Love with your style #i also was always enthused by the number of my fixations that you also liked! fnv! insc! ultkll! tf2 and hylics which i've never played! #and then there's hk which has been my most prominent special interest for close to two years so. safe to say that was. AWESOME to see #ALSO ALSO!! i think we may be like. mutuals-in-law*2?? #by which i mean one of my two closest friends on this site (holly) is mutuals with a cool artist (sodapop) #who i learned by accident that you've sent asks to before. either way it's cool :] #reserving the caption 'robot cowboys my beloved' for the future cause there are too many! victor and p03 and my own guy atoya and now this? #it is a wonderful problem. anyway i'm also looking at P3RI and realizing how many traits they and izzy share by accident lol #think. that should be all the tags (see: incoherent rambling). really like your stuff and have been meaning to draw something for you for #a while just got nervous 👍

[girlbossblackbeard]

S2 TRAILER ANALYSIS WITH 1 BILLION SCREENSHOTS

obligatory warning that this post is gonna be SOOOOOOOOOOOOO foolishly long and rambling with all my silly little theories and thoughts and if you ALSO have silly little theories and thoughts you should ABSOLUTELY share them here please!!!! we can clown so much harder when our cacophonous honking harmonizes!!!!!!!

NOW ONTO THE POST (putting it under a read more so tumblr doesn't literally explode):

-the revenge looks BUSTED AF: i don't know if this is from general disrepair when ed is in his kraken era or if she was in a battle but her sails are all dirty in the opening shot of the trailer, and later we see stede on her deck with tattered sails and ropes everywhere, AND i'm like 99% sure that the shot of buttons ziplining from one ship to another is him going from the Chinese warfleet ship to the revenge, which i'm guessing is essentially stuck bc the sails are so torn they would never be able to catch the wind strongly enough to move her. I also wonder if the shot of roach shooting a canon at something is him shooting a canon at her since we had all those allusions to her exploding from samba, vico, and david on twitter all those months ago

-stede's earring: he DOES NOT HAVE THE EARRING when we see him lying on the deck next to roach and sighing dramatically nor does he have it during his conversation with Olu about stede dumping him, but he DOES have the earring in later shots like the beach english fight and when he's talking about being a failure his whole life which means WE WILL GET TO SEE STEDE GET HIS EAR PIERCED!!!!!!!!!! we'll get to see him make the decision to look even hotter and who knows who does the piercing for him idk!!!!!! @sluterastede had a dastardly beautiful thought in her brain about ed giving stede the piercing and stede making groaning noises and izzy once again thinking they're flapping their jacks right there on the deck in front of god and everybody!!!!!

-stede is spilling his heart out ("i let him down. i should've just told him how i feel") to susan on her ship (you can tell it's her by the long hair)

-interesting that there's a drawing of a donkey next to ed's wanted poster considering s1 had the line "a rich donkey is still a donkey". also i can't really read what the surrounding posters say other than "WANTED 20 GUINEAS". is this in the republic of pirates?

-stede says "i will find him" meaning ed may be actively avoiding stede at the beginning of the season???? (or the basic laws of travel physics have finally caught up to them)

-"look, captain, you know blackbeard's gonna murder you" i just think it's interesting that Olu is referring to him as blackbeard again even though ed told everyone in his pink robe era to call him ed. like it makes sense that he'd say blackbeard considering ed is on a rampage but it just made my brain wheels start spinning

-the Kraken crew are eating cake :)

-ed is holding a torch while letting the storm rain down on him: i don't think the laugh we hear is his because i don't think his mouth is even open during that slow-mo shot

-STEDE with a TEAR in his EYE as he says "i think i hurt him pretty bad"

-ed sobbing on the floor while the little bride cake topper is next to his head

-ed choking on the weed smoke i'm ACTUALLY crying, but also: where the fuck is ed when he's sitting in the chair smoking??? i thought it was on deck at first bc above his head is really dark and it looks like the lanterns we see on the deck of the revenge but there's a chandelier too?? it might be whatever shop Anne Bonny and her friend "you two know each other?" run bc behind ed in that chair is just a bunch of random furniture and a chandelier like we see when ed and stede are at the market. in fact, i think ed is smoking with Anne Bonny because I think that's her hand in the corner of that shot:

-"no more booze, no more drugs, and no more _____" not sure what the end of that sentence could be but we know that the "stede" that was put in there is NOT what he actually says!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-"you two know each other?" now hold on a sec because it kinda sounds like stede met Anne Bonny and Co. separately from Ed/before that market scene (maybe in the teaser clip of Anne on Stede's lap??) WHAT IF WE GET THE AITA SCENARIO WHERE ED AND STEDE TELL PEOPLE ABOUT THEIR VERSION OF EVENTS AND NO ONE REALIZES THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT EACH OTHER UNTIL THAT MOMENT BC THEY'RE BOTH SO BIASED ABOUT ONE ANOTHER

-the evil guy definitely got his nose sliced off by Jackie. good for her :D I also don't think the evil guy is Hornigold, i'm still holding onto my theory that the man in the white rags we saw in the teaser and this trailer is hornigold's "ghost" that ed needs to contend with to find his inner peace or whatever a la stede with nigel's "ghost". but i DO think the evil guy is the rich prince dude from that leaked audition tape from rhys's friend. if memory serves, the guy wants to buy his way into the pirate lifestyle but he's pompous and entitled which makes him reckless. based off the production stills we also got today, he still had a nose when he went into Spanish Jackie's...but i don't think he leaves with one. so because he gets butthurt over invading a space that was NOT meant for him and faces the consequences of purposely disobeying their customs, he defects to the english navy and goes on a rampage against all piracy, very MRA energy :/ also, later izzy says to him "you don't know the first thing about piracy" which would further support that this guy just tried to buy his way in

-izzy gets an honest-to-god pegleg but he doesn't start the season off with it because we see him in several shots with both legs, like the wedding raid and swordfighting stede on the beach. unsure if he loses it due to infection from the toe situation or if he gets shot in the knee like i've seen some posts talk about, but @sluterastede mentioned that one of the leaked audition tapes for archie included dialogue about an amputation so maybe that character has to uh. Get Her Roach On

-as i mentioned before with the teaser analysis, izzy is clearly training stede for something and now im guessing it's the english but like we kinda knew that !

-olu is in a bar fight??

-THE "ED GETS CAUGHT IN A BUCKET ON A ROPE DURING THE STORM AND GOES OVERBOARD" THEORY IS OUT. THE "ED TIES HIMSELF TO A MF BIG ASS ROCK AND JUMPS OFF A GOD DAMN CLIFF TO GO ON SOME SOUL-SEARCHING JOURNEY UNDER THE SEA" THEORY IS IN. and what the FUCK is the rag man doing with ed up on that cliff hello?????? if my theory is correct and that is in fact hornigold's ghost or whatever, what advice or harmful shit is he saying that makes ed do that?????????????????????? but do note the large rock with the rope around it in the first pic

-the revenge crew is blowing up SOMETHING on the side of a building. maybe to cause a distraction or gain access inside the building? is it the side of Spanish Jackie's?? also hiiiiiiii lucius <3

-"our entire escape relies on this" i'm just assuming they're trying to escape from the english bc that seems to be the Big Bad of the season??

-not plot related but during the rope swinging training session izzy slaps stede on the ass and makes this face (sir??????):

>he also has his pegleg here so their mentorship may ramp up after izzy is out of commission for hand-to-hand combat. maybe izzy was supposed to have a larger fighting role alongside ed in defeating the english but once he became incapacitated he realized he would need to train someone else up for the job so ed would be sufficiently protected. but it also had to be someone izzy knew would be willing to die for ed to save his life if it came to that, just like izzy would

-"i've been a failure my whole life. it's not so bad once you get used to it" is stede talking to ed here? is that ed's hair in the corner of the frame??

>side note: as mentioned above, stede also has his earring by this point!!

-"you're going through that 'if i was a regular dude' phase" first of all, SPANISH JACKIE AND EDWARD TEACH BEST FRIENDS TRUTHERS RISE UP. second, why would ed be considered a regular dude now?? how did he lose his reputation? did he willingly give it up or was it taken from him? is this permanent or just temporary? or did he fake his own death with the cliff and the rock thing so he could retire and live a more normal life?? the swede doesn't seem scared of him at all in the final clip from the trailer, straight up asking him if he's poor and going "back to basics". of course, that could just be a power trip from being one of Jackie's newest husbands (or at least her waitstaff)

-possibly totally minor/just a continuity error thing, but: ed has a red ring. we saw it in s1 as he picks up the rather fine cashmere and we see it as ed dramatically drapes himself across the ship's helm with his head on his hand. we do not see it in the scene where he's smoking (see above) or the scene where he's talking to the rabbit. now, if you'll allow me a little bit of clownery for a moment, red has been explicitly coded in this show to be a symbol of love/the heart, especially as it pertains to edward like his red silk scarf as a metaphor for his heart in s1. what if. what if he. gave the red ring (his heart) to. SomeOne. because.....................because his heart belongs to st--[GUNSHOTS]

-olu, jim, and archie with garlic around their necks and making a cross with their fingers - clearly they think someone is a vampire on the ship. @sluterastede proposed it could be izzy, especially if he's on the brink of death due to an infection and frenchie managed to spread his superstitions to other people on the ship!

-THIS FUCKIN GUY. WHO ARE YOU??? it seems like he kidnaps stede and his crew and throws a party on the ship and drugs the drinks which is why everyone is kinda tripping/laughing in some parts. but then everyone gets tied down (stede to the mast, wee john's hands get squished, olu and roach's heads get squished, and jim and archie's feet get secured to the ship's railing i think??). also that wide shot is definitely the rando dude hitting some shrill high note at the same moment the revenge crew cry out in pain from all the squishing (except maybe jim and archie - they might just be laughing at the others bc they're badasses and this pain is nothing). also don't know what the guy is looking at when we first see him but im thinking maybe it's a wanted poster of stede and he's looking at the description of the gentleman pirate to confirm it's the dude right in front of him/that he's captured?? also i think roach is wearing flowers from the drug party in his apron when he fires that canon, so maybe he's tripping too and shoots a canon?? i need a prayer circle for the revenge's safety at this time

-stede has a bullet hole???????????????? did ed fucking shoot him in the heart?????????????????????????? he also notably does NOT have the earring in this scene but he does have the sexy stiddies (blue) shirt like we see in the other shot where he DOES have the earring. maybe this weirdo dude pierces stede's ear bc he thinks stede needs to look more piratey?? or stede gets absolutely sloshed (or drugged) and gets his ear pierced idk !!! maybe jim does it bc they're effortlessly cool and has a bunch of ear piercings!!!

-idk if this is a coincidence or not but i'm pretty sure stede in his training scenes with izzy is wearing the clothes he wore in that final shot of s1 as he rows to find the crew on the island (white linen shirt, dark pants, brown belt and boots). so either costume changes are happening later in the season, they're reusing outfits like normal people do, or the training montage happens extremely early on in the season

-so originally with the teaser trailer i thought ed falling in the water was followed by the shot of ed coming out of the water on the beach. i don't know if i fully believe that anymore because ed is NOT wearing his jacket on the cliff (see above), but he IS wearing it as he comes up out of the water, so either it's two different events and ed just spends a lot of time in the water this season or he puts his jacket on before jumping off the cliff

-ed his holding his right side as he slashes that dude on the beach so he definitely got hurt in battle but i hope it's not him getting stabbed bc ur supposed to cleverly take the sword on the left where all the unimportant bits are :(((

-I VERY STRONGLY BELIEVE that the person in the scene where stede turns around and shoots his gun into the air and everyone else on deck suddenly draws their weapons against that person is our boy lucius!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he's wearing a beret?????????? @sluterastede proposed that lucius got picked up by the english navy after getting thrown overboard and that's why we see him in the english navy garb (which we later see frenchie in too?? i believe an infiltration fuckery is afoot). also the fact that the shot immediately after this one is of Black Pete doing a happy little fist pump which i'm choosing to interpret as a cute little easter egg symbolizing Pete gets reunited with his love. i also also also believe lucius is in the shot of buttons about to zipline from one ship to the other. i missed him :')

-okay i know i said in an earlier post that stede running across the beach was romantic but i changed my mind and i think izzy is just making stede do cardio as part of his training lol. his outfit matches the one he's wearing when swordfighting izzy in that earlier wideshot and i think he even still has the scarf belt and the full beard in both scenes (explained at the end of this post via production stills) so maybe they have an honest to god training montage that takes course over several days and we get an incredible 80s powerballad to play on top of it while stede thinks of ed to motivate him or whatever. david jenkins hire me to help write season 3 i have ideas

-i think jim is behind stede as he breaks into the weirdly religious room we saw in the teaser when stede punches that guy??

-ed is pretty bloodied in the shot of stede leaning over him and saying VERY worriedly "ed????" so my theory is that ed got hurt in battle or he was taken captive by the Chinese warfleet and stede was worried he was grievously injured. however, once ed comes to and realizes who's kneeling over him, he gets pissed and headbutts stede because he's still mad at him for breaking his heart, and maybe his hands are restrained/his body is too weak so he can't push stede away. or maybe they had to begrudgingly work together on some mission and stede fucked it up and ed got hurt so he's mad about that idk!! ALSO HE'S WEARING THE CRAVAT HELLO

-ed in buttons's shirt looking so PEACEFUL what the HELL. obviously it's from the same general time as him being in Spanish Jackie's when she's talking to him about being a regular dude and later when the swede asks him if he's poor addkjfajdfhlkefh i fucking love this show and its writing so much. but ed says "no, i'm just trying something different man >:/" so i wonder if this is ed at the end of s2 or if this is more towards the middle as he's still in the thick of his healing journey. maybe buttons teaches ed about meditation and/or the tai chi he practiced with the Chinese warfleet crew??

-the BTS production still of ed with his "trust no one" tattoo also features what i believe is the treasure chest we see jim carrying off the ship in the shot where fang is smashing two dudes' heads together!

-i also think the BTS production still of stede with the beard is early on in ep 1 because he has a full beard (that im hoping someone on the revenge bullies him into shaving off to the scruff we see in the rest of the promo materials) and ALSO because he's wearing a long red scarf around his waist, which we never see again in any of the other promo material - except, however, around his neck as a makeshift cravat:

>it's the same exact material and everything! my guess is he gets his ass handed to him in a fight (maybe against izzy??) and his scarf belt gets destroyed, so he repurposes the shredded fabric into his necktie

-there's literal gold bars in the background of this production still lmao the kraken crew got BUSY during ed's goth era

>speaking of, the fucking hair dye dripping down izzy's forehead in this production still:

*sad clown noises*

in conclusion:

WE'RE BACK BABEYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

anyway that's my second dissertation on less than 2 minutes of content that turned out to be quite literally 6 pages long :)

#ofmd #our flag means death #blackbonnet #gentlebeard #edward teach #stede bonnet #ofmd s2 #ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd season 2 #ofmd s2 trailer #izzy hands #the swede #spanish jackie #jim jimenez #oluwande boodhari #wee john feeney #ofmd spoilers #i don't know what i need to be evaluated for but it's SOMETHING and it's PREVALENT #i spent a collective 5 hours making this post what the whole actual fuck

[amuseoffyre]

Well, mythical creature. Anything to say for yourself? Fuuuuuuuuuck yooooooou.

Bear with me because this may get rambly, but I find it fascinating that Izzy chooses to pick a fight with the figurehead on the ship. Given the history of figureheads as both identifying markers on a vessel and talismans to keep their crews' safe, I got thinking about the fact that for Izzy, Blackbeard is a figurehead.

Literally and figuratively, Blackbeard's identity looms large. Ed said it himself: he doesn't even need to be on the ship. People recognise the flag and the vessel and that's enough.

When the crew 'kill' Ed, Izzy is the one to keep his body on the ship. Which means that Izzy is the one to cover his head, leaving only his body visible. Only then, after Ed turns out to be alive again, Izzy goes and hides with the figurehead and - significantly - picks a fight with it.

Did Ed ever tell Izzy "I'm the kraken" (ie. a mythical creature)? Who knows. But even if he didn't tell him, Izzy said way back in 1x04, "I was honoured to work for the legendary Blackbeard". Blackbeard who is a legend and a ghost and a mad demon pyrate. A mythical creature, if you will.

For Izzy, he really seems to be redirecting all the rage he didn't/couldn't direct at Ed towards the unicorn. The subtext in the first scene between him and Stede at the bow is... uh. Quite telling.

Stede: He's seen better days, hasn't he? Izzy: At least he's still got both legs. Stede: Yes! Oh, he can't hear you. He's got no head. You've got a head, though, which you should look after.

Given that "losing your head" was another euphemism for insanity and Ed said himself "they think I'm a bit crazy" and Izzy described him as "going mad", Izzy really does seem to be projecting everything on to the figurehead who lost its head.

And then, in a drunken rage, he hacks the legs off the unicorn, dragging them along and throwing them down in front of the crew, declaring "There! It's done! Maybe next time he'll think twice about doing his fucking job".

We know that this is a triggering sentence for him. We saw it in episode 1 when he tries to bring the crew to order, and the memory of hearing it from Blackbeard - knowing he's expendable and not as valued or trusted or safe as he believed himself to be - led to him having his breakdown in front of the crew.

For him to bring this back up again, this open wound that led to the meeting with Blackbeard that then led to the confrontation and the shooting that cost him his leg, all ties in together with the unicorn.

Initially, I didn't twig why he was doing it beyond grief and misery and being drunk off his tits, but then in episode 5, it clicked. Specifically because of this exchange:

Izzy: Flipping the tables on Blackbeard didn't quite numb the pain? Lucius: Maybe we try what he did to you next. Izzy: What who did to me? Lucius: Blackbeard. Because he... chopped off your leg.

Which is what Izzy was doing in episode 4: trying what Blackbeard did to him by hacking the legs of the unicorn. Only it didn't help... until it did when the crew took a piece of the damage he had done and made something new from it to support him. (Hello, I am rolling around in the symbolism 🥰)

What I also find especially compelling is that he recognises that Lucius is trying to process his trauma the same way as he did: by doing unto others what was done unto him. Only Lucius does it by pushing actual Blackbeard overboard while Izzy takes his frustrations out on a myffic wooden pony.

#ofmd s2 #ofmd #ofmd meta #izzy hands

[ladyluscinia]

"What if it weren't like that?"

...or I'd like to propose a different theory of what's going on in Edward's head.

Going into the S2 finale, I feel like there's once again a huge consensus that Edward and piracy are an unsustainable mix, and he has to quit. Specifically after 2x07 he knows for sure, 100% that he wants to quit, and he's pulling away from Stede because he doesn't know how to communicate that certainty to him.

There's a very established meta framework backing up this belief. It's not new, just everyone pointing and saying "look! - the show is affirming us" at the same time. And it does make a lot of points about foundational trauma, the violence of the lifestyle, etc. I don't need to break it down for you. If you're seeing this post then you've seen the arguments before.

The thing is... I'm not actually sold on this read.

Edward is a complicated guy and I love to try and peel back his layers, and I'm not sure that retirement is truly his endgame. And maybe more importantly... I'm not sure retirement endgame is quite the thematic crescendo it's being presented as.

So let's talk a bit about Edward, particularly in 2x06 and 2x07.

---

Edward's Ongoing Depression Spiral

The thing about backsliding - and the Kraken was a pretty monumental backslide - is that even if you gain a lot of ground afterward, you still might not be much further than where you started.

Edward believing change is possible with Button's 2x04 guidance + his & Stede's conversation about taking it slow at the end of 2x05 are both huge steps for a guy that was openly suicidal at the beginning of the season. However, in the grand scheme of things, he's pretty much cycled back to the dilemma he was facing in S1 - continuing life as it was is intolerable, but he doesn't actually have a solid idea of what he wants. "Stede" is not a real, actionable answer.

In S1, this caused him to run recklessly into extremes of vulnerability with Stede because Stede was doing something different. He tried to metaphorically cut loose his entire history - as a pirate, as Blackbeard, as Edward Teach - and become a new "Ed" with no baggage, who was free to live an endless vacation honeymoon with his new boyfriend. And when the consequences of their own actions came crashing back in - an abandoned Izzy, Spanish Jackie, and Chauncey Badminton - Edward's desperate actions to save Stede turned into over-commitment to a guy he barely knows, a reckless plan to run halfway around the world to escape himself, and then a truly disastrous downturn when that blew up in his face.

Wherever you go, there you are - except Edward hates that guy. Edward's only concrete want so far for the new direction of his life is the one thing that's impossible - to not be Edward Teach.

So now, back to contemplating the same unknown future he was trying to chase in S1, the Kraken Era has given Edward new perspective, for better and worse. (I'm gonna link my rambling BlackHands / Kraken Era thoughts from 2x01 - 2x03 just because.) He's learned caution and is dipping his toes in self-reflection - Stede's love alone is not enough to save him, and his self-loathing has been acknowledged. Reckless pursuit of change without growth was doomed - an important lesson both Stede and Edward have started to learn.

Unfortunately, growth requires looking backwards, and if Edward was already disinclined to that due to killing his dad, he's struggling so much worse now that he's got months of fresh atrocities that he absolutely did not need to commit.

---

Drowning in Guilt

Edward's core trauma that he flashes to constantly goes back to killing his dad that night - something notably not associated with piracy. That guilt is the root of his self-loathing, but Edward is a rather troubled grown man with guilt aplenty, especially after the first two episodes of S2.

In 2x05 Edward starts with a CEO scripted non-apology firmly recategorizing all of his Kraken actions as "whatever that nasty dark stuff was that brought us here... it's in the past", and then his discussion with Stede does not involve too much reflection on why this probation is necessary and drops this gem:

"Oh fuck no. Apologizing? Nah. Didn't apologize for jack shit."

However - demonstrating self awareness / growth - he's also clearly projecting guilt and a desire (that's almost too big to look at) to apologize to Izzy for everything, and then he honestly talks with Fang (who he's known for 20 years!) about how he can not be understandably mad at him, after Fang pushes back on Edward's toxic rewriting of Knife Parade. He even learns to sit with himself!

All of which makes the start of 2x06 so layered.

We open with Edward sitting with himself, looking out over the ocean and stewing in guilt - in order: his dad, the storm, Izzy's toe, shooting Izzy, driving the crew to mutiny - and then the conversation that Edward was haunted by all last episode comes to him. He's back in his leathers - playacting the penitent with the onesie and cat bell got old after a day, and he had never truly linked his probation rules with any of his earnest feelings of remorse. Just a necessary performance to appease the crew.

Now he's himself again, as uncomfortable in his own skin as ever, and Edward Teach apologizes for Izzy's leg. He isn't being demanded to apologize by Izzy (no matter how much he may deserve it). Izzy is fully prepared to pretend it never happened despite the evidence of his body. But Edward wants to - needs to for the babiest step toward his own peace of mind - and so he does.

And then he flees from one guilt and accidentally stumbles into another. Stede has so helpfully pulled all Edward's Kraken treasure into one place, and Edward lampshades it:

"Excellent. A reminder of all my guilt. A guilt room."

Now, Stede has a decent idea here. His "poison into positivity" bit is not bad (and it echoes the language Izzy and Edward used - though I think it's a tossup whether Stede heard about that or if the parallel is purely on a Doylist level). It definitely lifts Edward's mood for the day and pulls him out of his guilt spiral for a bit.

Until it comes back so much worse.

Ned Low. Oh fuck the implications of Ned Low.

So here's the thing. People have rightly observed that Edward broke Ned's record intentionally during Kraken Era. In fact, since he makes the comment about "We got a record to break" after the wedding boat aka the last ship he takes, and Ned isn't coming after him for a tie, presumably he set the new record and then proceeded to break it over and over again. Just to rub it in. Just to really piss the sadist off.

And if Edward's attempt to take the whole ship and crew down with a storm at his lowest point was bad, what he was courting by baiting Ned before the season even started was worse. This is a man who would have tortured everyone on the breakup boat to death when he caught up to them, and Edward was passively planning on letting him do it.

Edward knows this.

Poison into positivity just became "oh shit I forgot I'm the most poisonous thing any of these people have ever run into," and he's just getting started. It's hard to shove it down and brush it off and pretend it was no big deal when Stede starts getting the hot poker to the chest.

He doesn't want to kill Ned because he's not worth the poison, but the poison is already here.

When Stede kills Ned, Edward has already spiraled. He's already got a whole narrative in his head about how this is all his fault, how this is his poison, his guilt, his Kraken surfacing to ruin Stede too.

"I'm not a good person, Stede. That's why I don't have any friends," Edward chokes out.

"It all boils down to this - You're afraid you're unlovable," snarls Hornigold's ghost in the gravy basket.

"I hate myself," Edward realizes.

"Don't do it, Stede. Killing in cold blood" - like I did - "you can't come back from that" - like I haven't.

Edward's guilt is projecting all over this scene. He's made some baby steps toward seeing Stede as a flawed person vs mythical mermaid whose love can save him, but the idealization is still coloring both their views. Stede still hasn't told Edward about any of his childhood traumas or deep seated insecurities, and Edward has continuously avoided putting together that Stede is fucked up as well. He's convinced himself that killing Ned Low is a great tragedy that will permanently scar Stede's previously unblemished goodness in a way that is all Edward's fault, and he's sticking to it despite how completely it does not apply.

Reality has never been much good at breaking through his self-loathing before.

Izzy tries to warn him to give Stede a minute, but Edward doesn't listen. And while there's a good amount of concerned boyfriend in that act, I also suspect there's more than a little self-harm. Edward's spiraling about what he's wrought. He shows up at Stede's door already paralleling this to killing his dad. Of course he wants to be in the blast radius.

Apparently, having sex about it.

---

"Bye-Bye" Blackbeard, See You Again Soon

Last season, when Edward's ignoring his past went poorly, he tried to metaphorically bundle Blackbeard and all his traumas up and cast them into the sea. He was "Edward Teach Born-on-a-Beach," and then "No-Beard" who found folding stuff in prison fun, and then he's kissing Stede and getting excited about picking new, cool names for China, because:

"Our old lives would be gone. Dead. Never were."

Edward, babygirl, that is not how that works.

Now, he's actively backsliding down a guilt spiral, just had ill-advised sex a day after the "take it slow" talk that he's already regretting, and he gets up in the morning, pulls on another goddamn robe, and goes to literally bundle Blackbeard up and cast him into the sea.

Babe you already tried this.

I don't think it's a coincidence that disposing of his leathers signals Edward is back to reckless change instead of intentional change. He tries to make breakfast in bed despite never having ever made breakfast before and explains his twine as a panicked decision. The idealization of Stede is back in force - he chooses now to tell him about the mermaid vision - "fantastic," he describes him - and thanks him for saving his life. (Once again, in times of trouble, Edward is the one offering up rosy imaginations for their relationship that swallow him whole and Stede is shoving his recent childhood trauma flashbacks down to be Normal™.)

In the Republic, Edward does avoid becoming straight up jealous of all Stede's positive infamy, but he's also doing his hardcore all or nothing thing again - this time running away from himself toward a grubby, poor, "nobody" version of Ed (or do we think he's gonna try "Jeff" again?). Jackie calls his attention to how his new life direction (as of 6 hours ago) is not necessarily aligned with Stede's, and - rather than doing something as crazy as talking - he mutters "shit" and heads to the docks where Izzy finds him.

For a guy who felt "Fucking great" throwing away his leathers, Edward sounds kind of sarcastic, even if I'm sure he's feeling just as light as he was on that Naval Academy beach. But Izzy - going through his own shit but still trying to be supportive - opened this conversation with a joke about Stede and I suspect thinks they are talking about putting the "Edward retiring to be with Stede" plan back on the table. (Edward could clear this up, but he's still not communicating his emotions to Izzy.) So Izzy encourages him:

"Maybe you should listen to it."

Edward's face falls, he looks back down at the fishing boat, and apparently gets himself a new job. He just needs to go dump his boyfriend about it. They're simply incompatible, you see?

Edward's a fisherman now. He's gonna sit with himself until he finds a better guy in there, just like Fang taught him. (Don't blame Fang for this 😆 he just wanted Edward to stop talking!)

Now there's a lot going on in the breakup scene, but I want to talk about one statement Edward makes (keeping in mind he's already spiraled all the way into his new fisherman identity):

"I don't even know who I am! Alright, I know I don't want to be a pirate, but you..."

Because, see - I don't think the second part of that is necessarily true.

It's not that Edward doesn't want to be "a pirate". That's what he's using as shorthand (and a way to strongly delineate his new career from Stede: "Fishermen and pirates - they're nothing alike.").

What he's not saying is, once again, I know I don't want to be Edward Teach.

And, babygirl, I love you... but too fucking bad.

---

Better Piracy as a Theme

There's a lot of meta around about how Edward views piracy as a kind of enforced toxic masculinity. How his traumas are woven so thoroughly into his Blackbeard career that the thought of continuing as a pirate is killing him. He has to retire. It's the only way he'll truly be happy as "just Edward."

And I question that framing.

Like... Edward clearly has trauma tied up in piracy. His time on Hornigold's ship appears to have defined his (and Calico's Jack's) fairly fucked up approach to casual violence. His time as Blackbeard has enabled his poor impulses, and he is absolutely sick of piracy as he's experienced it the first time we meet him. That's not in question.

But while leaving is one solution, I think change is another.

In the OFMD universe, piracy is not a stand-in for toxic masculinity. Stede, an outsider, describes it as a "culture of abuse" in the first episode, but it's the culture of piracy where we see openly gay relationships, polyamory, freedom of expression in clothing and presentation, the oppressed having power... to treat piracy as inherently toxic is to deny that the culture of piracy is what gave life to Calypso's Birthday party. Our main characters are pirates.

There is a lot of violence and most pirates are very troubled people, but it's not piracy's fault. That's getting the cause and effect reversed. The "problem" with piracy and pirate culture is that the people coming into it and building this community are already traumatized.

As Edward points out to Stede:

"It's usually something like that. It's often family-based stuff."

(Also the problem might be the pirate Captains, lol. I mean, if you start listing the major drivers and enablers of toxic culture... Hornigold, Ned Low, Calico Jack, Blackbeard. Fortunate, then, that the crew of the Revenge is demonstrating that piracy can also be about workers' unions and supporting each other against your shitty boss while operating in a thriving community. He can play nice or get out.)

Oluwande tells us from the start that people don't choose to be pirates - they get forced into it by terrible circumstances in a terrible society. Piracy is the community that accepts the outcasts, but it can't magically fix them. They have to do that themselves, which our crew is showing can be done.

Stede did not swan in with all the answers, but he gave his crew the space and all the confused-yet-well-meant support they needed to strengthen their own bonds and community. Oluwande and Frenchie especially have been really stepping up in leadership positions. Like, the whole plot of 2x05 was showing they have successfully formed a union and that they will operate as a united front against their captains if need arises. It's so good!

They are living that better culture that Stede wanted so bad, and it's not just our crew.

Piracy influenced by the Revenge crew has been shown as helpful and even desirable to chase.

Hellcat Maggie and the rest of Low's crew don't sail off to get new jobs - they are resuming piracy but this time talking about profit sharing. Anne and Mary, our oh so aggressive BlackBonnet mirrors, retired from piracy together like Edward was dreaming of in 1x09, and what "fixes" them is burning it all down and returning to piracy (rejecting Mary's fears) with their love at the forefront of their minds.

Edward wants to leave piracy behind forever because he has depression and hates himself, but the biggest thing he hates himself for isn't even a thing he did as a pirate. He's pushing back on his Hornigold trauma from the moment we meet him - in fact, I have a whole other meta idea I need to pull together after the season about how he has potentially thought he was doing "soft piracy" in spite of Hornigold this whole time - but the guilt he feels about killing his dad is still too big for him to even look at. And that won't go away even if he could cut 20+ years of Blackbeard out of his chest.

He's bored. He was stagnating. He needs to address that knot of self-loathing before it successfully drowns him.

Maybe people are right and he could be the one pirate to find peace operating a bed and breakfast? Maybe he'll follow in Jackie's footsteps and stay connected to the community by running a gay bar or something?

But I also think, maybe, he has a community surrounding him, a home and love on the sea, and a career with plenty of aspects he did enjoy - sailing, fuckeries, luxuries, creative problem solving - and he might just need to join everyone in striving for a better culture?

And step one would be realizing that wherever he goes, he's still Edward Teach, and he's got to stop running from that fact.

#our flag means death #ofmd s2 #ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd meta #my meta #blackbeard ofmd #edward teach #character arcs #ofmd piracy #ofmd 2x06 #ofmd 2x07 #really wanted to get this one out before the finale because i imagine it's going to either support my theory or cut its legs out #and if it's the former i want the opportunity to be smug 😘 #ladyluscinia

[bougiebutchbinch]

on a happier note

today my brain is buzzing with the idea of Ed getting incredibly hyperfixated on fishing and Izzy and Stede listening to him ramble for literal hours

Stede is sitting there with starry eyes, nodding along, doing his utmost to match Ed's enthusiasm! He's... a tiny bit tired of the topic, truth be told, but he loves how much Ed loves to talk! He can't keep all these facts about different flounder species straight in his head, but he adores how passionate Ed gets. Even if he's zoned out slightly, he's just enjoying the companionship and the vibes!

Izzy, in contrast, abruptly stands up and strides for the door because - fuck, it's been an hour. "Someone's gotta go run the ship. I'd better go make sure we don't run aground (again)."

Ed cuts off his spiel, eyes all sparkly and sad. He mumbles "Okay, mate. Sure, whatever," but it's sooooo obvious he wants Izzy to stay.

Izzy is kinda surprised - he figured Bonnet's eager nodding and encouragement was far more engaging to Ed than his quiet concentration. But there's no denying the hurt expression on Ed's face, and - fuck, Izzy's trying to do better.

They both are.

So, Izzy grumbles, rolls his eyes, and says "OKAY you can come with me and keep talking about your fucking fish. You too, Bonnet."

Ed leaps up, all boundless energy. Stede is quick to follow.

The result is Izzy stomping around the deck checking everyone's work while his captain's tumble after him like excitable puppies, Ed still explaining that he thinks the Sargasso Sea eels are actually the European ones, and they just swim a ridiculously long way to enjoy the clear blue water, because honestly, who wouldn't?

Although Izzy's obviously paying attention to his job and making sure shit's running smoothly, every so often he asks a really pertinent question that shows he's been absorbing literally everything Ed says and thinking critically about it, too. Ed lights up like... well, a lighthouse, and goes off on another spiel - while Stede smiles at both of them fondly and the crew giggles behind cupped hands~

By the end of the week, Ed's is sinking into the post-hyperfixation blues, where The Thing He Loved is no longer producing the same dopamine rush. But his boyfriends are there to pamper him and wrap him in blankets and make sure he knows that even when he's sad and gloomy, Izzy's gonna protect him and Stede's gonna give him affection (and even vice versa, in their own ways).

Izzy's head is now full of somewhat useless fish facts. He wouldn't have it any other way.

#steddyhands #izzy hands #gentlebeard #ed babygirl teach #stede bonnet #blackbonnet #ed teach #israel hands #dizzy izzy #ofmd stede #ofmd izzy #blackhannet

[dragon-kazansky]

Spirit of the sea

Izzy Hands x Reader (GN)

SEASON 2 CONTENT AHEAD!!!

Blackbeard rules the sea. Despite wanting his captain back, Izzy realises his mistake. Protecting the crew is his concern. Protecting you is his life mission. Stede's return brings hope, but there's a lot of work to be done before this crew becomes a family.

{Masterlist}

{Previous Chapter} - {Next Chapter}

Warnings: Spoilers. Stede!!!! Mutiny. Izzy needs help.

Chapter Twelve - Captain, oh Captain

♡♡♡

Edward's body was taken below deck into the small room Izzy had been occupying after he had been shot. No one had the heart to actually toss the body overboard. Not yet anyway. Everything was still so fresh.

Izzy was given a peg leg made from some of the furniture onboard. It isn't the most stable thing, though possibly more stable than anyone's sanity right now. It was enough to get him around with the help of a mop made into a crutch. At least he could get around a little.

However, supplies on the ship were at an all time low, and after having survived the storm, The Revenge had definitely seen better days. This ship was going nowhere.

For lunch, a seagull.

Savage, you know, but food was food when stranded at sea.

Izzy hadn't said much. After killing Edward, you had held onto him with all your might. Fang had helped move him to somewhere he could sit, while Frenchie, Jim, and Archie worked on the leg situation. You had held Izzy's hand, not leaving him at all. You pull him into your body, letting his head rest under your chin as you held him to you. Izzy said nothing. He did nothing. He just let you cradle him.

He had lost a piece of himself.

Now you all sit in what was the captain's quarters, munching on a dead bird. How the mighty have fallen. You eyed Izzy in your peripheral vision as he downed more rum. He had been clutching a bottle most of the night.

You said nothing. He had every right to be upset.

As the crew eat, the door opens with a small squeak. You raise your eyes to see. The crew all turn and look too.

Right there before your eyes is a man you didn't think you'd see again.

Stede Bonnet.

♡♡♡

The crew of The Revenge is taken aboard The Red Flag. They're given soup and blankets.

Catching up with the others felt like a relief after not seeing them in so long. But seeing Lucius made you feel more than just content. When he saw you he looked like he had seen a ghost, but he hugged you happily.

He looked you over, seeing the state you were in, and you took one good look at him and knew he had been through some shit too.

Neither of you spoke about what happened to either of you, but you could appreciate the mutual understanding you shared.

You were just glad he wasn't actually dead like Ed had said he was.

After catching up with the crew, you managed to sit down to enjoy your soup.

"I just don't understand." Stede, though glad to see the rest of his crew, has his questions. "Where's Ed?"

You glance up from your soup to catch the eyes of Jim and Archie. It's awkward.

"There's no good way to say this, Stede." Jim says. "But-"

Jim is interrupted by Archie who connects the dots with Stede's name.

"Is this Stede? Like, Stede-Stede."

"What does that mean? Stede-Stede?" He asks, looking at Archie.

"Nothing. I just thought you'd be, ya know, taller, muscly, you know?"

You look down at you soup and find you don't have the stomach for more. You put the bowl down. Izzy watches you from where he is leaning against the mast.

"You okay?" He asks quietly.

You gaze up at him, a little startled to have been caught in a moment of weakness. "Yeah... fine."

"Why are you saying that?" Stede asks, bringing your attention back to the other conversation.

"Just the way people-- This is good soup, isn't it?" Archie rambles.

"Yeah, it's very, very good soup." Fang agrees.

"Why can't I get a straight answer from any of you?" Stede asks, looking at each of the group.

"Bonnet." Izzy hobbled his way over. "Good to see you."

"Piss off, Izzy. I don't want to hear from you."

"Frenchie?" Stede asks, looking at the man.

"Yeah?"

"Where is Ed?"

You all look at Frenchie.

"He retired."

Everyone looks at each other, nodding.

"Why are you all looking at each other?" Stede is confused.

"When you get old, if you don't wanna work anymore, you can just give up, I guess." Frenchie said, trying to make his point.

"Yeah, I know what retirement is."

"Yeah, that's where he went." Archie's says.

Everyone nods.

"What about my painting? Why is it all stabbed up?" Stede asks.

"That was me," Izzy tells him.

Stede sighs and walks off to look out at The Revenge.

Izzy turns back around to you to see you haven't moved from where you had sat. There's a distant look in your eye. He hobbles over to you, standing right in front of you. You blink and look up.

"We have to tell him," Izzy says.

You turn and look at Stede.

"I know..."

♡♡♡

That night after Ed stated a relationship was forbidden between you and him, Izzy's world had turned cold. He had only you only for a few mere hours before you were taken from him, and he was punished for threatening Ed. The days that followed had been some of the most miserable days of Izzy's life.

Your warmth was gone from his life and he hated every second of it. Looking at you from across the room wasn't enough. He had to hold you, feel you, give you the love that burned inside of him for you.

Still, no matter what, Izzy would take every punishment if it meant you were safe and out of harms way. That's what love does to a man. It protects the people that matter.

♡♡♡

Back aboard The Revenge, Stede was taking a closer look around his old ship. So much had happened to it since he left. In this quarters, knives stuck out of every surface, his furniture broken and misplaced. There was no life in this ship any more.

You helped Izzy inside. He only got so much support from the old mop and his makeshift leg. He couldn't get very far. In his other he clutched his beloved rum bottle, which he refused to part from right now.

"Don't cry, Bonnet."

Stede turns around to see you both there.

"We just redecorated."

"I don't mind, actually," Stede says. "I think the knives really help bring the place together."

"What'd you do with him?" Stede asks, after moving further away. "I know he wouldn't have left by choice."

"I know you think you understand him." Izzy stares at Stede.

"He was either gonna watch the world burn or die trying. So, which is it?"

"Alright, Bonnet." Izzy pulls away from your arms and hobbles across the floor, closing some distance between him and Stede. You don't move. "Have it your way. He went mad. He tortured the crew. He took my fuckin' leg 'cause I dared to mention your fuckin' name. He was a wild dog and we dealt with him like one."

"You sent him to doggy heaven," Stede whispers.

"No, I could never do that." Izzy said. "We deserted him on a beach left nature to do the rest. More than he would have done for us. You and me did this to him. And we cannot let this crew suffer any more for our mistakes."

Izzy glances over his shoulder at you and you feel your heart twinge at his meaning.

"Why would they suffer?" Stede asks.

"If your captain sense mutiny, she'll kill us all," Izzy explains. "That's pirate code."

You find yourself walking over to Izzy and reaching for his hand. He takes it with ease, turning his attention to you. You give him warmth when there is none.

♡♡♡

The feeling of your body pressed against his as the storm raged on around you, it was like life had been put back into him. All he could feel was your arms around him. He held you with one arm, wanting to treasure this moment. After everything he had endured to keep you safe, he knew it was all worth it for this feeling. The feeling of you alive and warm and in his arms.

♡♡♡

Blackbeard's body was discovered under the deck of The Revenge. The crew were promptly arrested for it. Yeah, mutiny.

Izzy was sitting down nearest to the bars. You were sat on the floor by his leg, resting your head gently on the thigh of his missing leg. Izzy had stretched his peg leg out enough for you to get comfy.

"I mean, clearly, it was him or you." Lucius says, leaning against the bars of the cell. "Sucks you guys are probably gonna be executed tomorrow."

"Eh, nah. We've been livin' second-to-second for a while now." Frenchie tell him, leaning back against the wall he is sat against. "It's actually kinda nice to have a deadline."

Stede walks in quietly. You raise your eyes to look at him. He must have seen the body by now. Izzy turns his head to look at him

"Go on, Bonnet. Give me your worst," Izzy tries to get him to bite.

Stede just shakes the bars before leaving again.

You turn your head to hide your face in Izzy's thigh. Unaware that Izzy is blinking back tears behind you.

At least you'll die knowing what Izzy's love felt like, even if it hadn't lasted very long.

Izzy looks down at you. His heart yarns to just... scoop you up in his arms and hold you. You're free from the Kraken, but at the cost of execution tomorrow. Izzy wanted to give you so much more.

So much more.

♡♡♡

Izzy's personal cell was his cabin after you were no longer allowed in it. His bed felt wrong to sleep in, his pillow no longer comfortable. Sometimes he felt like the walls were suffocating him. He began to hate this room.

Izzy had lost you once before. Last time he thought you were dead. Those 6 years without you were some of the loneliest years of his life. Yet, this is worse. This time he knows where you are and he can't reach out to hold you.

This was a game to Blackbeard. A very sick game.

♡♡♡

You're not sure how much time has passed before Stede comes running in again. He looks almost excited. You lift your head to watch him as he passes towels to Wee John, asking him to take them.

Stede then unlocks the cell.

"What's going on?" You ask.

Stede smiles. "We're taking back The Revenge."

"Yes, Stedey-boy!" Frenchie grins.

"Stay low and meet me at the bow." Stede instructs.

"Love a last-minute escape." Frenchie is all giddy.

As the crew file out of the cell, you get up off the floor and turn to Izzy, helping him up. He looks at you. You offer him a small smile.

Maybe not all hope is lost after all.

Stede instructs Wee John to get the a new wheel. Realistically, there is only one way to go about that.

The rest of the crew follow Stede up onto deck, after making sure any crew up there has been dealt with. Everyone moves quietly as they cross the deck. Izzy leans on you for support, Fang just behind you both incase he needs to step in and help you.

You look right across at the Revenge.

Stede hands Pete the crossbow which will shoot a line across to the other ship. It needs to be ana accurate shot as there are no second chances here.

You had no idea Pete could use a crossbow.

"We've only got one shot." Stede explains. "That's on you, Black Pete."

"Me? Why me?"

"You've always said you got perfect aim."

"I never said that."

"You say that all the time," Roach says to him.

"You said it today," Lucius points out.

"Come on. The entire escape relies on this," Stede states.

"Fine, I'll do it. Jesus." Pete takes the crossbow. Everyone goes quiet.

He takes aim.

He focuses.

"Just breathe into it-" Buttons says. Fang, Izzy, and yourself all turn to hush the man.

More seconds tick by.

"Nope, I can't do it," Pete says, lowering the crossbow.

You roll your eyes as the crew groans. Izzy gives you a nudge and then nods at this crossbow. You stare at him and shake your head quietly. He nods again. You sigh and let Fang take hold of Izzy as you march over to where Pete is.

"Give that here." You take the crossbow from him and nudge him out of the way. You hold the crossbow up and aim. You take a deep breath and fire. The line sinks right into the mast with perfect aim.

You pass the crossbow back and look at Pete, unimpressed. Lucius looks very impressed.

One by one the crew zipline across to The Revenge. Wee John breaks the wheel from The Red Flag to use for The Revenge.

You help Izzy onto the zipline, where Fang will catch him on the other side. You go after Izzy, Fang also helping you.

Soon enough everyone is across and the wheel is put in place.

"Frenchie, you get started on the riggin'. Roach, come here and brace the yard." Buttons starts giving out orders.

Zheng is now aware her prisoners have escaped. She stands on deck of her ship looking across at you all. Jim cuts the line so they can't zipline across.

The Revenge starts to sail away.

You stand at the railing smiling. Now that was an escape.

Izzy approaches Stede. "I just wanted to thank you for-" Stede walks away, not letting him finish. Izzy stands there quietly. 'Not leaving me behind.'

You turn to see him. You leave the railing and walk towards Izzy. He looks up when you approach. He says nothing. His eyes glisten. You say nothing as you reach out and wrap your arms around him. Izzy falls into your chest.

You're both here. You're both safe.

You both get to live to fight another day.

You can't ask for much more than that.

♡♡♡

Izzy's body fills with warmth. You're back in his arms again. His heart calms. He's far from okay, but you're here now. You're keeping his demons at bay.

He can't ask for much more than that.

♡♡♡

@grippleback-galaxy - @askmarinaandothers - @godlikegallagher - @for-fuck-sake-im-alive - @whiskeyswriting - @lxsm2 - @bloody-bunni666 - @the-chocoholic-writer - @bugbugboy - @callmemana - @the-shenny-of-azkaban - @cool-ontherun-world - @outer-space-beech - @ahewi24 - @grace585 - @innertimemachinegirl - @dmitrytherat - @emilynissangtr -

#spirit of the sea #izzy hands x reader #ofmd season 2 #ofmd #ofmd s2 #ofmd spoilers #dragon writes

[katemartinismywife]

just wanna be yours - k.c

☺︎ kamilla cardoso ☺︎

"Kamilla you can't keep showing up uninvited" Sydney scolded closing the door behind the girl. "Why? You're aren't going to have anyone over so" Kamilla shrugged pulling the girl in for a hug and a forehead kiss.

"If you missed me you could have just said that" Sydney smirked pulling the girl onto the couch with her. "What are you watching?" Kamilla asks kissing her neck and looking at the television. "I was watching Grey's Anatomy before someone interrupted me."

"You love me" Kamilla teased poking her lips out for a kiss. "Nuh-uh, I don't know where your lips have been" Sydney gently pushes her head away and presses play on her show.

"Why are you crying mami?" Kamilla softly asks wiping off Sydney's tears. "Because Denny Duquette died all because of stupid Izzie" Sydney cried turning off the tv. "You're so dramatic" Kamilla laughed kissing the side of her head.

"No, I'm not... Denny and I had a connection" Sydney mumbled wiping her tears and huffing. "My poor baby" Kamilla spoke placing kisses all over her face.

Sydney groans after Kamilla's phone goes off for the tenth time she's been here. "Mila please answer your phone, I know you hear it going off," Sydney tells her as Kamilla groans knowing exactly who it is.

Sydney looks out of the corner of her eye seeing Kamilla text someone named "Camryn💗". Sydney's heart breaks a little, but not as much as it did the first time. She honestly doesn't know why she keeps accepting Mila's stupid apologies knowing it was going to happen again.

"I think it is time for you to leave Kamilla" Sydney clears her throat and stands up passing Mila her shoes. "What? Why? What's wrong?"

"I'm not doing this again. I can't. It is the same thing every time Kamilla" Sydney rambles pushing off Mila who was trying to reach for her. "Leave Kamilla, please. Run back to Camryn like you always do. I'm not doing this anymore"

"Baby no, I promise you it is nothing like that"

"Get out"

"Baby please" Kamilla begged walking to the door with Syd behind her holding in her tears. "No Kamilla, I am never enough for you. So forget about me. Forget how much I love you and care for you. Forget everything, because it clearly means nothing to you"

"Syd that's not true. Let me explain"

"I don't want to hear it Mila. You know what even if it isn't what it clearly is then this is your fault. You made me like this. You made us like this. Bye Kamilla" Sydney rambles slamming the door in her face.

"Fuck! Sydney open the door!"

"Please baby"

#wcbb #oc #wlw #kamilla cardoso #south carolina gamecocks #gamecocks #south carolina

[goldfishontheceiling]

wait imagine this

sometime between island and s2 ep27 of action, (probably on his time at playa de losers), ezekiel gets his grubby little farmer boy hands on the internet.

specifically, youtube.

now this motherfucker is absolutely mindblown because "oh wow! people post stuff here and people watch it!!!"

long story short, he makes a youtube channel.

and calls it therealEzekielMiller

(i swear this isn't an advertisement [as far as i know] the channel doesn't exsit)

so. it doesn't do too well. my guy has like the shittest camera quality and doesn't even know how to change his pfp.

also, all his titles sound like clickbait. like imagine seeing this title as your scrolling.

(REAL) SNEAK PEAKS AT PLAYA DE LOSERS!!! (Courtney freakout!?!?) 😨😨😨

yeah...

however, no matter how grainy and pixelated the footage is, it soon becomes important.

because that's some of the last footage of him.

we all know what happened to zeke in world tour. and if you for some reason don't, please don't look it up if you haven't seen it yet. watch the show. (now ill admit that's advertising).

so, ezekiel's feral, he goes missing, and this youtube channel is throughly investigated to try and find any potentially helpful footage.

the most they found was courtney freaking out. and izzy taking the camera like 5 times. pretty much everything else was about this "brilliant invention" called harmonica rap.

but anyway, a bit after RR, they finally find ezekiel.

and he immediately gets sent to a hospital because HOLY SHIT IS HE GREEN???

the doctors conclude that zeke should eventually be able to return to (almost) completely sanity. so, while he goes through this longggg healing process, the media hears his story.

and that old youtube channel? yeah it EXPLODED

and what does ezekiel do with this new found fanbase?

he gets scared and avoids the internet.

i mean can you blame him??? he went from having NO FANS to HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS, and the only memories he has are blurry ones where he's green and growling at people.

but he couldn't avoid it forever.

and for the first time in over 7 years, ezekiel posts another video.

and it BLOWS UP

THE WHOLE CHANNEL DOES

but deep down our boy ezekiel is still a sheltered farm boy. he had to google how to change his youtube pfp.

so just imagine this scrawy, slightly green, teenager/early adult in front of a camera, rambling nonsense and throwing "yo" or "eh" into pretty much every sentence.

just IMAGINE THAT

"get ready with me to get a rabies shot"

"guys what does lol mean?"

"storytime: i went feral in a cargo hold"

"reading my old rap songs"

"riding a horse after 7 years"

"what does gay mean?"

"get ready with me to see my ma and pa again"

anyway yeah in conclusion give farm boy internet access.

#shitpost #might turn this into an au if I get bored #or if people like this #td ezekiel #ezekiel td #total drama ezekiel #ezekiel total drama #ezekiel miller #give farm boy internet access #idk what im doing #idk what else to tag

[izzysillyhandsy]

Ed and Izzy: Cleaning up the mess

As of the end of Ep7, Ed has left Stede and his whole life behind because "he doesn't even know who he is". And I'd like to suggest in this rambling essay that Ed's journey to self-knowledge and self-love can't properly begin before he's come to terms with what happened with Izzy.

Although Ed has steadily been trying to make amends, at the start of Ep6 he's still feeling unsettled and guilty as hell about the terrible things he did (was capable of!): killing his dad, condemning his whole crew to certain death, Izzy's toe, shooting Izzy, being "killed" by Jim and the crew with Izzy looking on...

There's a surprising amount of Izzy in Ed's flashback (I was honestly surprised the toe cutting made it in - somehow the whole discussion around "Izzy deserving it" made me think Ed thought so as well? But of course he doesn't think that. Izzy does.)

And while Ed's central conflict is his underlying self-hatred and self-doubt, there still is a daily reminder of all of his worst tendencies and (still very recent) acts right under his nose.

I think I got all the poison out of my system...

...or not. The indestructible fucker's still here.

Izzy is Ed’s walking and talking guilt room and no amount of deflecting, story-telling or sugarcoating can turn that poison into positivity.

Stede, I love you for your sometimes naive, sweet outlook on life (and Ed does too), but Ed and Izzy, that’s years and years of love and devotion, resentment and hate, building each other up and tearing each other down. They’ve just come out of the absolute worst breakup in history, with so many things unsaid and unknown they’d need the whole of S3 to talk it through.

Stede applying his motivational poster line to Izzy of all people is a little bit tone deaf, especially because it happens right while Izzy’s singing a bittersweet love song about/to Ed.

Which he continues, in French, while Ed and Stede are having sex for the first time so that's definitely not helping. I wonder how good Ed's French is, but it is honestly almost comical to imagine Ed cheating on Iz making love to his new boyfriend while his ex is singing his heart out about „It's only him for me, and me for him, for life - he told me, he swore to me, for life“.

So Izzy's still here. Izzy is still visibly hurting, physically (your fault!!) and mentally (your fault as well in so many ways). And you're already over it and having fun with your new boyfriend? Of course not.

Whatever they were/are to each other specifically, Ed and Izzy were as good as married. They spent almost every day together for decades. Izzy let himself be maimed and hurt over and over again out of love and loyalty. And Ed feels very, very guilty about it. Even if this guilt is not the first thing constantly on Ed's mind, it's certainly there in the background, simmering.

On the other hand, Izzy is the one who kept Ed stationary - they had a good, secure (for pirates anyway) life together, why risk change? I don't think Izzy had noticed (or wanted to notice) how bad it'd gotten for Ed for a long time. So there's also a lot of resentment there from Ed's side, all tied up with Izzy.

It's a very complicated mess and I think that all this is at least part of the reason for Ed's confusion and need to... just go.

But that's not all, by far.

History repeating itself...

...maybe this seems a bit familiar?

We don't know a lot of Ed&Izzy's backstory (apart from: it's a long one!), but I think it's (almost) canon that it is Izzy's job to make sure Ed is content and safe and, most importantly, to kill for Ed.

And even though their relationship (whatever it was) probably didn't start out as tender and sweet as Ed/Stede, I think they started out much more carefree and happy, possibly excited and adventurous. Until their lifestyle took a toll on both of them - Izzy as Ed's killer and constant protector and Ed as Blackbeard, who Ed started to resent more and more. In the end, all that was left were two broken people in a codependent relationship.

Now it seems like gentle, sweet Stede is slowly turning into Izzy 2.0 - swearing (as far as I remember, Stede almost never said fuck in S1), becoming a "real pirate", and worst of all, killing for Ed even though Ed almost begged him not to (seems familiar?).

Plus, this is happening when Ed, still freshly traumatized from his stint as pirate extreme wants nothing to do with violence in general and piracy specifically. Least of all he wants Stede damaged (or izzyfied).

Stede seemed like a way out of pirating, a chance for a loving, fulfilling relationship. Maybe even a way out of his relationship with Izzy, who I think Ed (subconsciously?) blames for the destructive path his life had taken.

Now he isn't so sure anymore if Stede actually wants this.

Talk it through...

...eventually, maybe. Hopefully.

Of course, not every obstacle Ed has to face, every step on the road to self-love and happiness is about Izzy. Vice versa, Izzy is much more than his relationship with Ed, and he has his own problems independent from him.

But this "marriage" with Izzy was Ed’s longest and most important relationship, and also the last relationship before Stede. The way their relationship became restrictive, damaging and unescapable in the end was both their faults. It'd be quite natural if Ed was a bit cautious with that kind of history. Am I a person who always ends up like this? How did we fuck up this badly? Is there a way out?

Most importantly though, a lot of Ed’s guilt and self-doubt is wrapped up in Izzy - if you're capable of doing that (and that, and that) to the person you love - what else are you capable of?

In conclusion, Ed and Izzy need real closure, one way or the other. Before that happens, Ed won't be happy on any way he chooses, and certainly not in his relationship with Stede.

At the moment, they're not talking, really. It's incredibly sweet though, the way they make these little concessions towards the other (Izzy doing much more than Ed, as per usual). They're almost shy, asking for advice, giving reassurance and understanding, and sharing bottles, smiles and looks.

Will they get a long heart-to-heart in the finale? Of course not, there's not enough time. I think we might get a symbolic moment though.

Ed already knows Izzy loves him. Izzy really doesn't know (on top of everything else, poor kid). The only thing he got from Ed was the "Sorry 'bout your leg", even the latch got a bit more.

Izzy needs to hear that too. "It's not your fault you're broken. You didn't break you. Just trying to do your job, weren't you?"

(btw, I love that Ed is softly blowing onto the latch here, while Izzy is doing the same to his little shark <3)

It's also possible Izzy will get his "I loved you, best I could" in person. Hopefully not exactly in those words. But, for both of them, this will be a start to open proper communication (which might happen offscreen between seasons).

And when we get S3, Ed will be (more) prepared to embark on his journey to happiness, with or without Izzy by his side.

#ofmd #ofmd s2 spoilers #edward teach #izzy hands #ofmd meta #Ed's got this Izzy-shaped rucksack on his back #it's not all about Izzy as a person it's what Izzy stands for #this was just from Ed's perspective - Izzy's also in dire need of something more #TALK boys

[childoftheineffabledivorce]

I cannot express how quickly my feelings about Izzy shifted. I rewatched season 1 and am now on season 2 again. Watching season 1 I saw him in such a different light. The man he knew and potentially (definitely, in my opinion) has loved for years was becoming a stranger to him. It was more than him disliking Stede. He saw the transition from Blackbeard to Ed as his Captain losing himself instead of finding a way to express another part of himself.

And maybe I’m looking too deeply into it but if Blackbeard was rejecting his old way of doing things, he was rejecting Izzy too. Because Izzy was an embodiment of his old life and behaviours. That was all Izzy knew. HE wasn’t being transformed by love and care. HE wasn’t having someone see a new side of him. He was standing on the outside looking in while his Captain transformed and left him behind.

Then Stede is gone. He leaves Ed. Abandons him and none of them have any insight into why. Izzy is proven right in his mind, Blackbeard never should have given up who he was. How could he know that encouraging him to go back to who he was would go the way it did? Ed was broken, and a return to his status as Captain was Izzy’s attempt at a solution.

This is a bit of a ramble so I’m not sure if it’s completely coherent but I think it says a lot that when Izzy started receiving the kind of love the crew has for each other, when that thing he couldn’t understand and was constantly on the outside of was directed at him, he changed. He saw it’s value. He fucking whimpered (still kills me) when he was held.

That man was never actually a villain. He was just lost.

(Also 100% convinced he had a kink for Ed being mean to him until it went too far and no one can change my mind. Did you see the way he cupped his face when Ed choked him against the wall? Exactly.)

#ofmd #our flag means death #izzy hands apologist #what a wild ride it’s been #ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd s2 #ofmd spoilers #izzy hands #ofmd season 2 #is this a meta post? I don’t fully know what that means

[godasfarasyoureconcerned]

the word “poison” in e6 is very particular. there’s a lot of words stede could have used to describe the atmosphere on the ship, and many words less loaded against ed than “poison.” this is so obviously him using the word that izzy used for it. the word that ed latched onto and circled in on when asking his crew how they felt. the one that got a gun pointed in their faces and lost izzy his leg. it’s no coincidence that stede used this word— he wants to hit that emotional point and show ed that he can turn it into something else

the obvious question is: who told stede about the use of this word in particular, enough for him to stress it to ed later? was it ed himself? was it izzy? the crew? god

i can imagine ed sheepishly explaining to stede that izzy had come into his room complaining about the poisoned atmosphere, and that ed wanted to know if the rest of the crew agreed, so he went out to ask them, casually throwing in the fact that he had his gun in hand the whole time. explaining that izzy challenged him again in front of the whole crew as if he didn’t know what that means in pirate code

i can imagine izzy telling the same story, begrudging for different reasons than ed is. him explaining that he finally told ed that the atmosphere was poisoned— he sailed with blackbeard for years but it was never that terribly incessant or incessantly terrible. him explaining that ed asked each of the crew if they thought so and then put the gun to his own head and started to ramble and he looked really fucking close to— so izzy stepped in and told him it’s all because of his feelings for— well, stede knows what happened then

i can imagine the crew explaining that they told izzy that tossing the treasure is stupid before he got all choked up, and then suddenly he was breaking down worse than fang. them saying he told them he’d try and talk to blackbeard about the loot. him disappearing after pulling himself together, and the next time they saw him, he was chasing after a pissed-off blackbeard. them saying blackbeard pointed his gun at each of them before himself, and that he seriously seemed like he was going to end it until izzy told him the ship was poisoned because of his feelings for stede. saying ed shot him instantly and told frenchie to finish the job, and that when he found out they kept him alive he was angry enough to sail them into a storm

thinking about stede getting a combination of these stories. about him realizing that all three stories are likely amended for comfort. ed is probably brushing off some of his.. scarier moments. izzy’s probably leaving out the worst, most humiliating details. the crew clearly don’t know what either of them said in the confidence of his quarters

stede obviously knows that izzy told him that he loved him, he says as much in e7 to izzy himself. that raises similar questions: did ed tell him that? did izzy? how does stede know izzy told ed that he loves him? it Wasn’t News to him, so which one of them told him? both? he get different versions of that story too? did ed say “fucker went ‘we’ve worked together for years’ and ‘i.. have love for you’ before he fuckin challenged me in front of the whole crew. what the fuck am i supposed to do with that” like it was so obviously too little too late? did izzy say “i asked him ‘what am i to you’ which seemed fair since he was asking for another toe. told him i had love for him. he shot me not five minutes later” oh my god WHAT does stede KNOW

#ofmd s2 spoilers #mine #izzy hands #edward teach #stede bonnet #blackhands #blackbonnet #ofmd #our flag means death #ofmd meta

[lee-lucius]

A New Kind of Affection

Summary: Izzy Hands accidentally reveals how touch-starved he is to Stede, who is more than happy to help.

Word Count: 2,765

Happy Holidays and Happy New Year @aaaxolotl I was your Secret Santa! This was super fun to get to make, and I hope you enjoy! 💙

He still wasn't quite sure how Stede had dragged him into any of this. 

It hadn't been long, only a week or two, since Stede called him into his room, oddly similar to tonight. He'd asked for them to dine together, and well, Izzy didn't see much of a reason not to indulge his captain in his strange request.

They met in Stede's room for a surprisingly pleasant dinner, though Izzy felt unsurprisingly underdressed compared to his host's garish outfits, and he was well aware his table manners left much to be desired, but neither of those had been quite necessary for a pirate's life, and Stede didn't seem to mind, not when he was seemingly so enthralled by the company. 

Through Izzy teaching him how to fight, they'd grown fairly comfortable with each other, building up a rapport that was considerably less antagonistic than it had been before. They fell back into it over dinner with ease, perhaps more amiable than they'd ever been, and Izzy found himself even laughing at a few of Stede's jokes, though he hid it behind a strategic cough or two.

Neither of them realized, or cared, just how much they were drinking until they were stumbling around the room, hiccuping around their laughter, for once a genuine smile on Izzy's face.

Memories of that night were fuzzy, and what happened next wasn't entirely clear, but he crumbled under Stede's inquisitive gaze, his warm smile, his soft whispers, and he'd admitted something he shouldn't have.

Something he'd hoped that they'd both forget come morning, even when Stede squeezed his hand before he left, promising something about him being more included, more appreciated, before Izzy stumbled back to his own quarters, flushed from more than just the booze. 

He wished he hadn't admitted it. His jealousy when he watched his crewmates, or his captains, and saw the easy air around them, the casual touches and comfort; something about them made envy stir in his chest, thinking about the kind of relationship he hadn't let himself have for years, or maybe ever when he really thought about it.

Now, on The Revenge, it seemed more of a possibility than it ever had before. After breaking down, being vulnerable, Izzy was welcomed; something had shifted; whether it was in him or his surroundings, he didn't know, but it was a good change, no matter how uncomfortable it had been.

His relationship with the crew was different now. Friendly, because he'd finally allowed himself to be open to their friendship, and the change was more gratifying than he ever would've thought.

It was the most relaxed, most relieved Izzy had been in a long time, but he still wanted more, even if he felt he didn't deserve it.

He never would've pursued it ordinarily, admitted it to anyone besides himself, if his drunken self hadn't betrayed him entirely.

But that change, the change Stede brought on, was a good change too.

When they'd met again the next morning, Izzy more pissy than usual with his aching head, he thought Stede may have forgotten it based on his aimless ramblings filled with pleasantries that Izzy had to bite his tongue to sit through. 

Stede asked him again to meet him later in his room, and Izzy agreed; he hadn't expected what happened. 

He supposed it would be like the previous night, a pleasant conversation, perhaps a shared meal, a drink or two, though certainly not as much as they'd indulged it before.

And it had started that way. There was something about Stede, something that used to make Izzy's skin crawl, his anger, his annoyance overpowering everything else he felt about it, but now it only filled him with warmth, an easy, familiar feeling that allowed him to unwind. That must've been why he didn't suspect anything, certainly not when he and Stede shared a drink, casually picking at a tray of assorted snacks he'd prepared.

Maybe he should've; when Stede sat next to him this time, instead of sitting across from on the other side of his long table. It could still be ignored whenever they bumped shoulders or when one of them shifted slightly, their knees accidentally touching, or when they both reached forward at the same time, hands colliding for the briefest second before Izzy pulled back.

Until their food was finished, abs the conversation lulled, a not uncomfortable silence enveloping them as they nursed their drinks, and Stede, seeming to muster all of his courage, leaned into him, curling into Izzy's side and resting his glass on his shoulder with a content sigh.

Izzy stiffened, and his muscles didn't relax again for a long time, but they both kept the silence, and Stede didn't move.

His breath was steady, ghosting against Izzy's cheek and leaving a faint trace of Stede's wine, fruity and rich. While his hair was soft, delicate strands brushing against and tickling his ear, but he couldn't be bothered at the proximity, at his hair that was too lovely and soft and clean to ever belong to a pirate, yet here Stede was. Izzy wondered if it was Stede's pulse or his own that he felt, drumming violently against his skin, wondered if it mattered.

Not long afterwards, Izzy excused himself, and they parted ways; this time, he had no excuse for his blush.

-

He didn't know why Stede kept inviting him, or why he kept coming.

It wasn't something he was familiar with. His family had never been awfully affectionate. And as he got older, as he became a pirate, the opportunities became fewer and fewer.

Most contact came during a fight, in the form of a sword or gun or swinging fist, where the only pleasure that could be found came from the adrenaline coursing through his body, the satisfaction of winning, of surviving. There were few other means that arose on a ship aside from boyish tussling, accidentally knocking shoulders with his crewmates, or the rare moments of intimacy when he let someone else, let Ed, tend to his wounds after a particularly bad fight.

But Stede Bonnet came along with his eccentric, unpirate-like ideals and continued to confuse Izzy the same way he had since the first day he met. Bringing that unnecessary frivolity with him and introducing everyone to lavish comforts they didn't want to forgo. 

That, he supposed, was why he continued to join Stede; he didn't want to give it up just yet.

Which was why he was sitting on his couch, thumbing through a book from Stede's library, which was still a horrible idea, even if it made for interesting entertainment, with Stede next to him, hand holding Izzy's as he thumbed through his own novel.

It was one of the more relaxing ways he'd spent an evening in quite awhile, or it would've been, if there wasn't one thing nagging him, making his mouth twitch as the uncomfortable feeling spread. "Stop that?"

"What?"

"The hand," he murmured, gesturing with his neck as he struggled to insert his bookmark with only one hand.

"Oh," he let go, a slight frown tugging at his face as he leaned away a touch. "Sorry."

"Not you. Just tickled a bit."

Stede paused, the smile returning with a playful twist, "You're ticklish?"

He grunted, eyeing him warily. "Guess so. Never really been before."

"I've gotten into a few good-natured scuffles in my time. It can be quite fun!"

"You like it?" He couldn't help asking, surprised at the sudden admission. 

"Well, I've certainly always enjoyed it."

Izzy huffed out a laugh. He supposed it wasn't that surprising; Stede always had been odd, and it was just like him to like that kind of thing, something so strangely cute.

Leaning back, his eyes raked over Stede, cautiously debating in his head. It was clear as day that Stede was comfortable with him; the only limiting factor seemed to be Izzy's own hesitance, his lack of familiarity with the casual touches Stede so readily gave. He was being quite open about his fondness for tickling, almost suspiciously so. And while Izzy had never even dreamed of tickling someone before, had never even been the one to initiate contact between him and Stede in a non-violent manner, he supposed that here, now, wouldn't be a bad time to start.

"Let's see it then," he shifted, angling his body as he leaned closer to Stede, searching his eyes for any tinge of desire, of excitement.

"Go right ahead!"

His smile grew, eyes brightening at the prospect, but there was an undercurrent of shyness there, weighing down his cheerful expression, matching Izzy's own nerves. 

Slowly, he reached his hand out, touch and hesitant as he dragged in along Stede's arm, grazing his silken shirt. While Izzy had never been tickled directly, he'd experienced it plenty of times through accidental touches brushing against his own sensitive spots, so he had a fair idea where Stede would be ticklish; he just didn't know how much he could handle, yet.

Keeping his touch light, Izzy placed a hand in his stomach, unable to help a smile at his small gasp, and gently dug his fingers in, scratching at him through the cloth. 

At his deep breath, Izzy's eyes flitted back up to Stede's face, taking in his widening smile, perhaps brighter than he'd ever seen it before, as a giggle erupted from his lips, more pushing through in a steady stream of laughter as Izzy brought his other hand up to squeeze Stede's sides.

"Pretty sensitive, aren't you, Bonnet?"

"I suhuhppohose!" He huffed out, hands clenching and unclenching in his lap, trying to stay still for Izzy.

"I wonder where else…" he hummed, fingers dragging up towards his ribs, lightly pinching the crevices as Stede huffed. He was less ticklish there, but it was worth it to see the way his eyes crinkled, squeezing shut with a whine at Izzy's relentless pokes and prods to the area.

He continued exploring, marveling at how his armpits made Stede shoot his arms down, his resolve not to impede Izzy crumbling at the overwhelming sensations, while his neck made him scrunch up, looking oddly reminiscent of a turtle. Even his ears were ticklish, and quite sensitive to gentle scratches and traces, even more so when Izzy blew gentle puffs of air on them, making him squeal.

But his knees were probably his favorite spot. If only for the fact that when he squeezed it, the most adorably obnoxious snort burst from Stede, forcing him to bury his face in Izzy's shoulder in shame, while the other desperately tried and succeeded to produce the noise again. 

Gentle tickling seemed to get to him worse, if the way he shrieked when Izzy's nails glided against the backs of knees were anything to go off of. Even if it only produced quieter giggles compared to the full-bellied laughter Izzy knew he could force, it was better for watching Stede, seeing the miniscule changes in his expression, in his voice, and for allowing Stede to focus on Izzy's occasional teasing.

"Still having fun, Bonnet?" 

"Of… cohohuhurse!" He exclaimed, a tired sheen to his eye at how long it'd been, but his joy was much more prominent. 

Izzy opened his mouth but quickly snapped it shut, head swiveling around at the sound of the door opening,only to find Ed standing there, a confused grin hanging on his face.

"Is this what you two are always doing in here?" He laughed, stepping inside and shutting the door behind him.

"Ed!" Stede breathed out, face brightening again at the sight of his as he sat up straight, trying to smooth out his clothes, his hair, all while keeping his eyes locked on his partner.

Izzy stood up, taking a step away from Stede as his gaze flickered between the two. Would Ed mind him touching Stede like this? Stede had said it was fine, but he wouldn't want to overstep more than he already had, wouldn't want to take anything more from Ed.

"Well come on, mate," Ed faced Izzy, smile shifting into something devious as he walked closer, "why stop now?"

"You… don't mind?" He couldn't help asking, still not sure how he fit into a situation like this.

"Stede, you mind?"

"Nahat at all… I was just showing Izzy how fun tickling could be. He was much better than I would've thought!"

"Is that so?" Ed smiled, walking past Izzy to sit down next to Stede. "Think he's shown you enough yet, Iz?"

"Not quite. I think he still has a bit more to show us," he sat down on the other side of Stede, accepting Ed's acceptance of his role there. If it didn't bother Ed, then he wouldn't let it bother him anymore, even if he was sure everything between them wasn't exactly resolved yet.

Stede laughed nervously, glancing between them, "What else is it you want to see?"

"Mostly…" Ed hummed, grabbing one of his arms to wrench it above his head, waiting for Stede's nod of approval before digging into his underarm, "to see you laugh your ass off."

"Ehehehed!" He cackled, helplessly flailing, and Izzy took that as his cue, bringing his hands back down to squeeze at his thighs and knees.

If Ed wanted to push him, he could do that. And, judging from looking at them, Izzy guessed this wasn't the first time something like this had transpired between Ed and Stede. He only wondered if Stede had realized how awfully ticklish Ed was too, a secret Izzy had long since learned and guarded, but didn't seem inappropriate to reveal later, after they'd finished with Stede.

"Ihihizzy!"

"C'mon Stede, you keep saying our names like that. Just spit it out. What's on your mind?" Ed cooed, lightening up on his tickling to give him a moment to breathe.

"Ihihit's a lohot," he panted, grinning from ear to ear, "buhut it's fuhuhun."

"'Course it is. We're just getting started," Ed purred, delighting in how Stede's flush grew at his words, heart skipping a beat.

Izzy watched Ed kiss Stede's forehead, an uncomfortable pang shooting through him, until Ed turned back to him with a grin and wink, and together they resumed tickling Ed to bits.

-

"Good time, love?" Ed smiled afterwards, helping Stede to his bed.

"Yes, it was all quite lovely," he sighed dreamily, pulling him into a quick kiss. "But I do like it more when you're the one under me."

Ed reddened at that, laughing away his nerves as he glanced back at Izzy, who was awkwardly trailing towards the door.

"Where are you going, mate?"

"I thought it was time to excuse myself," he cleared his throat, averting his eyes. 

"No, no. Come here," Stede beckoned, and Izzy supposed he never really could say no to him that easily, certainly not now, so he swallowed and stepped closer and closer until he was standing by Stede's bedside.

Stede took a breath, reaching out for him, cupping his face, bringing his own closer, as he whispered, "May I?"

Izzy's eyes flickered to Ed's face, seeing only a smile and the slightest nod, not a hint of jealousy or resentment to be found. And so, he allowed himself to once again indulge in the luxuries that came along with Stede Bonnet, closing the distance between them to capture his lips in a gentle kiss.

Stede beamed at him when they pulled back, and he could only wonder if his face was as hot as it felt, practically petrified until Ed grabbed his hand, tugging him forward. "Come on, Iz. Get comfortable," he said, shrugging off his own leather jacket and slipping off his boots before he slid into bed beside Stede.

Even Stede's large bed was a bit cramped with the three of them, but Izzy thought it may have just been the best sleep he'd ever had. 

It was only affirmed by what he considered the best morning of his life as he woke up in the early hours, watching the sun stream in through Stede's windows, illuminating the two beside him that made it all feel so divine.

A faint breeze blew in, the cold weather penetrating the peace of their haven as he curled further into bed, into Ed and Stede, suddenly reminded on what day it was. As he stared at them, he could only smile, feeling at peace. He didn't know what the future would hold, but as long as he had them, he could feel secure and welcome the new year, whatever it brought.

#my writing #squealing santa 2k23 #tickling #tickle fic #ofmd #ofmd tickle #stede bonnet #ed teach #izzy hands #blackbeard #blackbonnet #gentlebeard #steddyhands #lee!stede #ler!izzy #ler!ed

[itsclydebitches]

Okay, so as the canon recedes from memory and fandom jokes take hold — la de da the world turns — I’ve seen an influx of takes that have steadily moved away from “Izzy’s tragic because this whole debacle is technically his fault (going after Stede’s hostages)” and “Izzy is sympathetic in part because he’s so bad at villain-ing” straight into serious claims of, “Wow, Izzy is just totally incompetent, huh?”

No, no, no, Izzy is terrifyingly competent.

We as a fandom need to remember our meta roots; one of the very first things ever acknowledged in the community: this is a character who has suddenly been thrust into a new genre.

For me, it’s basically the storytelling version of the “Who would win, Goku or Saitama?” question. The answer has nothing to do with power, skill, or competence and everything to do with what would be funny, because Saitama exists in a universe where, unless it’s more entertaining for him to lose, he automatically wins — always, forever, it’s the default state. That doesn’t make Goku, a guy with the power of the gods in his own universe, incompetent by any stretch of the imagination. It just means he’s suddenly been hog-tied by the rules of a new reality.

Izzy is the Goku to Stede’s Saitama.

Izzy scopes out Stede’s marooned crew (because he didn’t remember to have someone steer the boat), buys the hostages he lost, and homoerotically skillfully cuts up his shirt with hard-earned sword skills. Stede wins when Pete throws a rock.

Izzy corners Stede in the duel before he’s even realized they’ve started, hits him across the face, disarms him, and skewers him to the mast by successfully stabbing him. Stede wins because the handle of Izzy’s sword broke and there’s supposedly nothing important on the left side of the body.

Izzy is a complete asshole about chores because in his ‘real world’ a lack of munitions, or barnacles on the ship’s side, leads to death. Or at least lost raids (which they also need to afford basic supplies). Stede exists in the world where you can walk off stab wounds, find an oasis of oranges at your assassin’s church, and row straight to your lost crew without a need for anything like supplies, rest, or a map.

Pre-Stede Izzy successfully intimidates Fang, gets him to obey his commands ( “Fang!” *hiss*), and Fang admits that complaining about the abuse wouldn’t do any good. Post-Stede Fang, Lucius, Pete, Wee John, etc. can’t be intimidated because they know that here, such threats are meaningless.

Izzy manages to wrangle together Calico Jack, Spanish Jackie, and the British — three very different parties with beef against each other and him — all in an effort to get Stede executed. Stede survives because Ed pulls out a trump card that we learned about [checks notes] right now.

Stede beats Izzy again and again and again because Stede is working under the rules of the Romantic Comedy. Is it funny if Stede were to win a duel through absurd means? Yes? Then that’s what happens. Would Izzy winning here interfere with the romance between Ed and Stede? Yes? Then that can’t happen. It’s as simple as that. Unless we circle away from the stages of Epiphany (Stede’s talk with Mary) and Resolution (heading back to Ed for the presumed reunion) and Izzy becomes a more serious Obstacle to their love, everything he attempts is doomed from the get-go. Even if he were to be written as a more serious threat to the romance, the comedy inevitably obliterates any real chance he’d have. Unless OFMD doesn’t just pull lightly from other genres as it has in season one, but takes a hard turn into something new... Izzy is fighting a losing battle. He’s Goku powering up to fucking super saiyan and then being understandably confused when Stede manages to trip over his own feet, starting a Loony Toon-esque domino fall that somehow ends with Izzy K.O.’ed. How did this happen? Fuck if he knows. The logic he’s worked under all his life says it’s impossible and yet... here he lies.

Honestly, I ramble because competence is SUCH an important part of Izzy’s character. Competence is what’s allowed him to survive into his 50′s (unless he’s really 16 lol), help build the Blackbeard legend, and gain the kind of respect that has the crew (initially) jumping at his command. Izzy knows that he’s competent. His entire, prickly personality is built on being competent, particularly when competence is used as a defense mechanism. (No need to grapple with feelings when he can just kill someone.) More importantly, he knows that, under ordinary circumstances, not being competent gets you killed. He’s watching Ed trade in protective leather for lace shirts, fill up on marmalade, turn sword training into a flirting session, admire model ships instead of formulating plans — all these things that should, according to the rules Izzy has spent his entire life living by, get them all killed. We know Stede wouldn’t survive a day in the world of “real” pirates, where Izzy originally hails from. Izzy knows it too. We know Stede survives anyway because this is a rom-com and he’s the lead. But Izzy doesn’t know what genre he’s in; certainly not that the genre has changed — and fuck, if the rules of the universe changed once before, who’s to say they won’t suddenly change again? What if he wakes up one day on a frilly ship, with a useless crew, a domesticated Blackbeard, and the world is a horrifying mess of cruelty and violence again? They’d be screwed. He’s running around bitching about plans, munitions, ship speed, killing pets, formal duels, and yes, avoiding “namby-pamby” soft things because dammit of course those things matter. They always have. Yes everyone needs specific duties because otherwise the ship falls apart and they all die. What do you mean the ship isn’t falling apart while everyone eats marmalade and has gay sex? That’s not possible.

Imagine you were a crazy competent member of society according to current social norms. Maybe you’re highly educated, have a six-figure job, are meeting all the expectations for a family, you’re considered conventionally attractive, you eat well, go to the gym every day, have impressive hobbies, give to charity on the regular, maintain a thriving friend group — in every way that your peers might judge your worth within this specific social circle, you are killing it. Then you wake up one random morning and, as Badminton puts it, you’ve entered Backwards Land. People suddenly laugh at your well-balanced lunch because pff, what do you mean you’re not just eating a bucket of candy like the rest of us? Certain public displays that would have been unthinkable 24 hours ago are suddenly occurring on every street corner. You walk in to a promotion meeting with a detailed report on why your work of the last 30 years is worth recognition. The new hire suggests they have a face-paint party instead of running the company and your boss is like, “Well damn if that isn’t the best suggestion anyone’s ever given me. You’re promoted!”

What?

Izzy is fascinating in part because he’s a HYPER-COMPETENT individual who took to his toxic, violent, homophobic, highly repressed society like a duck to water, only to find one day that the rules of the universe had changed (for the better) but whoops, nothing he’s good at suddenly has a foothold anymore. You’re an expert at running a ship? Ships are just a backdrop to romance and it doesn’t matter if there’s, you know, ammunition, or whatever. Supplies — like oranges — only matter if they’re forwarding relationships. You’re an expert swordsman? Yeah, good luck winning a rigged fight where literally anything goes provided it’s funny enough (and you, as a tightly-strung rule follower, are not funny). Your entire identity is built around intimidating and executing people? The queer polycule thinks your threats are hilarious and if you strand people on a desert island their lighthouse captain will just row to them in a single scene; the guy tossed overboard will just climb into the walls and sustain himself on paper or something. You’re Alice in Wonderland except you don’t remember falling down the hole. The fact that Lucius’ cut off finger is used for a moment of (wonderfully gross) humor and he’s totally fine when he wakes up, whereas Izzy’s severed toe is more straightforwardly horrific and requires a cane, just highlight that they’re living in different genres. For Lucius, a severed finger is a moment of comedy (Dutch fuckery) and romance (Pete whittling him a replacement). For Izzy, a severed toe is a moment of devotion to a toxic relationship (eating it on Blackbeard’s command) and a #SeriousInjury that he literally can’t walk off. Izzy’s got the worst of both worlds at the moment: governed by his original, gritty genre and unable to circumvent or reap the rewards of the rom-com.

Which only leaves the question of whether Izzy will remain the tragic figure — but still very humorous for the viewer — who is either killed or permanently exiled due to his inability to adapt? Or will he grudgingly (oh so grudgingly) turn himself over to this new set of rules? I’m personally hoping for the latter BUT with moments here and there where the gritty drama bleeds into the rom-com; moments where things suddenly do become legitimately perilous and Izzy’s honed skills once again become necessary for survival. Like Ed who moves from the poetry-loving Edward into the murderous Kraken, Izzy has the potential to move between and/or straddle genres in some pretty entertaining ways.

#OFMD #Our Flag Means Death #Izzy Hands

[ladyluscinia]

Oh and since I am already rambling about Izzy's leg and "redemption arcs" tonight - I don't think I commented on this before because no one I'd been talking to about the season has this mindset, but I just want to acknowledge for the record that the idea Izzy went through a successful "redemption arc" is lowkey ridiculous?

Like *I* do not have issues with it because I don't think he did anything he really needed to be redeemed from with the crew. He was mostly an antagonist due to situational reasons and the situation changed, ergo now he's their friend. Minimal characterization-based hurdles involved. The only place he needed to actually talk through some healing and accountability was with Edward, and that's complicated by a) how I am actually criticizing that as unsatisfying, and b) the story tipped the balance of "harms that need to be addressed" so heavily toward Edward that it feels mostly pointless to bring up Izzy anyway. Broadly? Izzy's cool, and he bonded with the crew.

But for people who actually still think Izzy left S1 needing to be held accountable for crimes or overcome some internalized biases he had...? Um. That didn't actually happen on-screen. My guy pretty much got tortured a whole bunch and then given some community support. He's expressing pretty much the same values in 2x01 as he is in 2x06, minus maybe some self-worth (provided by the community support). If you think this a departure from his 1x10 characterization, then all the "redemption arc" growth happened between seasons in a timeskip and as a direct result of being tortured?

Which sounds the opposite of satisfying?

I mean, again, I think the only important realization he makes between 1x10 and 2x01 is "Kraken Era = Bad" and maybe reluctantly accepting "shit Bonnet wasn't just a fling", neither of which is groundbreaking enough he needs to have them on screen, and that his S2 arc is about breaking up with Edward / that self-worth which we do see. But if I thought it was a redemption arc about growth from S1 I would have notes.

#our flag means death #ofmd s2 #ofmd critical #this is mostly just funny to me. like people thinking he went through an offscreen la croix version of theon greyjoy's arc??? #and it somehow made him a better person??? (also on a serious note how *punitive*) #like if you entered the season thinking he was an evil little man and left it loving him i don't think it was because of an arc #i think either you don't really question framing - s1 izzy sucked because stede pov said he sucked and s2 izzy is framed better #or you picked up the s1 evil izzy meta position without really integrating it into your read of the show and casually dropped it in s2 #when the show did not linger on his supposed multitude of bigoted crimes like the writers of that meta position said it would #izzy hands ofmd #ofmd meta #ladyluscinia