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#i don't like this feeling
teapotart · 1 year
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My best drawing from February
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vampirepuppygirl · 3 months
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I need to get more hormones, I'm almost out of spiro, totally out of estradiol and progesterone, and I feel gross
But I can't afford the blood draws anymore because my insurance doesn't pay for them and they're like $500
And I only have a month's supply of spiro left and I don't know what to do
I've considered going diy but I don't know what's safe and I know my *dose* but all the diy resources I've seen get murdered before I have the chance to use them and ugh
I don't like feeling desperate
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juststayquiete · 9 months
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*slaps Alex* IM GONNA GIVE HIM SO MUCH TRAUMA OF MY OWN🥶🥶🥶
But actually reading into the theme and being like OH kinda pisses me off honestly!!!!
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My imposter syndrome is really feeling stronger than ever and I think it's because my academic year is quickly sailing towards an end before a short break and then another year.
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phantasmagoratory · 2 years
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feel like shittt again
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gerritcole-coded · 2 years
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you know what if Benny gets vaxxed I'll like him. I'll still think he's a bit stupid (because he didn't get vaxxed for so long)
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tsunderedoctor · 2 years
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I feel sick...
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vamprisms · 26 days
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i feel like a lot of the 'i hate kids' crowd would be more tolerant if they understood that due to a kid's limited experience of the world that 4 hour flight might just be the longest they've ever had to sit still for or that trapped finger might literally be the most pain they've ever felt in their short life or they might not have ever seen a person with pink hair ever so of course they want to touch it or nobody's told them yet that they can't run around the museum and they only just learned cheetahs are the fastest animals so of course they want to put that to the test. how were they supposed to know etc etc.
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taffywabbit · 4 months
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they should invent a new type of "staying in bed for 2-3 hours after you wake up repeatedly opening and closing apps on your phone" where it makes you feel awesome and energized and emotionally fulfilled
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 1 month
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The math just adds up!
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ace-and-ranty · 7 months
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I gotta say, one of the greatest achievements of my 20s was that I learned (mostly) to differentiate between:
"I truly do not want to go" and
"I'm just feeling the Demand Avoidance, and I will like it once I get there."
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hollowboobtheory · 6 days
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really? another album? didn't she just make one??
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roninkairi · 11 months
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You can only reblog this today.*
*PLEASE READ THE TAGS
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inkskinned · 9 months
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because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.
you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.
you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.
don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.
if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.
you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:
how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!
aren't you happy yet?
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kozzax · 1 month
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It's times like these, when Grian refers to snails as molluscs and gastropods, that I remember he has a degree in marine biology. In retrospect this makes the fishing arc funnier I think.
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sallowcorvid · 2 months
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Jealousy jealousy
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