#i find it incredibly cold. even if the benefits are real (even if it’s a FWB kinda thing)

[seasurfacefullofclouds1]

.

#don’t post anon #I heard that but then I really couldn’t believe it #but I guess it’s true?? #it’s hilarious tho! #personally I don’t really care but #I think he’s just so short of actual normal-people-friends #that he clings to industry people as if the friendships are real #but you can see he goes through them like water … and has since he’s been isolated in his solo era #all of them use him just as he uses them #i find it incredibly cold. even if the benefits are real (even if it’s a FWB kinda thing) #I don’t want to guess what his day-to-day life is like but #I suppose to have fame and wealth like the Kardashians was worth it all

[oftenwantedafton]

Moody and Gray - William Afton x Female Reader

Chapter 1

Rating - Explicit

Warnings - no sexual content in this chapter

Also available on AO3

You really hate your job as a waitress at Freddy Fazbear’s Pizzeria.

The pay is lousy, your income largely reliant on tips from adult customers that are rude, their children ruder still. Between the noise of the arcade and the music blasting in the background you end up going home with a headache more often than not. You could happily go without so much as seeing a slice of pizza for the rest of your life.

So why don’t you quit?

Well the answer to that is up one flight of steel stairs to an office that overlooks the entire restaurant. His restaurant: the owner, William Afton.

See, there’s something about him that you just can’t shake free from your mind. Sure, you’ve always had a bit of a thing for older guys, and he’s got a good decade and a half on you easily. But it’s more than that. Messy dark hair and high cheekbones, aquiline nose and piercing pale gray eyes. Not classically handsome in the sense of the word, but compelling all the same. Like a vampire or…yes. That was exactly what he reminded you most of. A real life modern day version of Dracula.

The funny thing about your boss is, he doesn’t seem to like the job much either. He distances himself from the clientele as much as possible. You know he’s married and he has kids, but damned if you’ve ever seen them. Hell, he doesn’t even bother wearing a wedding ring. He spends most of his time either fiddling with the animatronics in one of the back rooms, or brooding in his office, tucked away in that crow’s nest kind of space lined with windows, the blinds sometimes closed, and what does he even do in there when they are?

On this particular shitty work day you’ve just had some brat accidentally/on purpose dump an entire glass of fruit punch on your work shirt. Of course the company shirts are white. You ask one of your coworkers where you can get another one, and wouldn’t you know it, they’re fresh out in the employee locker area, the most recent new hire getting the last one, apparently. As if anyone ever even sees the kitchen staff.

“Maybe ask Afton,” the woman suggests, gathering a stack of dirty dishes to return to the kitchen.

Ask Afton. Well sure, you could do that. No big deal. You’ve never spoken to him personally. It was beneath him to hire waitstaff, apparently. But yes. You can.

You climb the steel steps and knock on the door, glancing out across the dining room, a kaleidoscope of colors rioting below. It really was a spectacular view, even if you didn’t care much for the scenery.

You can hear a muffled voice inside and try the door handle, finding it unlocked.

The owner is seated at his desk, phone in hand. Great, you were interrupting him.

He beckons for you to come inside, continuing his conversation as you shut the door and step forward.

“Yes, we offer a good benefits package. We don’t have on site childcare yet, but that is something we’re looking to add in the future for both staff and visitors.”

Good benefits your ass. Trying to get a vacation was like pulling teeth. And God help you if you got sick and needed some time off. It had been made clear during orientation you were expected to come to work, plain and simple. As if serving pizza and ice cream to children was as essential as, say, being a healthcare worker. It was beyond absurd.

Your attention wavers, and you step to the row of windows. The stage curtains part. It’s time for another round of songs performed by the animatronics. The drink that had soaked your shirt front was cold and it’s unpleasantly plastered to your skin. You shiver and shuffle your feet, hoping the phone call will end soon.

“Great, we look forward to seeing you soon.” At last. You turn and see your boss rising to his feet. He’s incredibly tall, lanky. The man is all lines and angles.

“Can I help you with something?”

God, that British accent. It’s another one of your weaknesses. Not the cockney type, but this smooth mellow tone that strokes silkily along your skin. You blink and recover. “Yes, sorry to bother you. Someone spilled something on my shirt and we’re out of them downstairs. Maybe you have a spare here?”

His eyes flicker down to your chest, where a good deal of the red liquid has seeped in, lingering perhaps a bit longer than was warranted. “I see. Well, let’s have a look, shall we?”

It’s cold in his office, you realize then. Not just because of your damp clothing, but there’s actual air conditioning running. It’s the middle of winter. You wonder how he stands it.

William rummages through a cardboard box set in the back of the office and withdraws a folded shirt. “What size?”

In truth, you’d never liked the fit of yours, choosing a size down.

“Hmm. Well, this will have to do.” Two sizes down. You frown. “You can manage for the rest of the shift with that, surely. I have an order for more coming in soon.” He shuts the box swiftly and you wonder for a moment if he isn’t lying about the sizes available.

But to what end?

“Ok, well thanks, I appreciate it.” You turn as if to leave.

“Wait a moment.”

He joins you at the window and presses a switch. The blinds slide closed.

Huh. Fancy, you think, your brain not catching up to what is happening.

“I imagine you’re eager to be out of that shirt. I’m sure it’s unpleasant. I’ll of course be a gentleman and turn around.”

“Oh, no, I can change in the restroom, it’s fine.”

“No, I really must insist. It wouldn’t do for our customers to see staff looking so…unkempt. Against company policy and all that.” He grins, the teeth flashing at you looking incredibly sharp. God, he really did look like a vampire. He turns around as promised, though. The back of his purple vest has a thin gold buckle at the waist. You turn around for good measure and pull the stained shirt over your head, hurriedly trying to tug the new one on. Your bra’s partially soaked but screw it, you’ll just have to cope.

Yeah, it was definitely too small.

You’re still struggling to get it over your tits when you feel the hands at your back, feverish hands that linger before attempting to assist you.

“Well this really is a bit snug on you, isn’t it?” He chuckles softly and the sound does something, making your insides twist and curl.

His hands are at your front now and there is no pretense when those long fingers of his take a great deal longer dragging across your white satin clad breasts as the rest of the shirt is wrenched into place and you turn to face him.

“There we are. Now you’re presentable.” Another smile. He’s still standing close to you. You can feel the heat wafting from him. Like standing in front of a fireplace.

“Thanks,” you mutter awkwardly, not sure of what else to say.

“My pleasure.”

A little hum of amusement punctuates this last statement and then he hits the switch to open the blinds again.

You can feel his eyes on you all the way down the stairs, his silhouette unmistakable through the slats covering the windows.

You’ve finally gotten your employer’s attention.

#william afton x reader #william afton x you #william afton #fnaf fanfic

[prettyinpurplelights]

AWKWARD

something quick i wrote while listening to awkward by sza

“You’ve got to stop throwing yourself across the field like a newborn pup Ky.” You tap at the open skin across his left shin with a wet gauze and he winces slightly. “This is barely a graze, you could’ve sorted this out yourself.”

“I needed an excuse to see you. You’re not answering my calls anymore.”

“You can’t be calling your physio at 3am.”

“I can’t call my friend at 3am?”

“Do you call all your friends at 3am to fuck!?” You raise your voice, exasperated. Exhausted of his questions.

It had been 2 weeks since you’d ended things with him and he’d refused to let it go. You and Kylian had met by chance at a bar when he’d gone out with Neymar for drinks, one thing had led to another and you’d found yourself under him in his king sized bed at his apartment in the city he stayed at whenever he went out with his teammates. You’d just moved from London, fresh out of med school with a job at one of the most prestigious clubs in the world. Or so you’d heard, you didn’t know anything about or follow football very much, your aim was to move to the US and work with NBA athletes but your mentor at the hospital had recommended this job for you since you’d mentioned your interest in sports science and the pay was great, the experience would be unbelievable and in Paris of all places. You couldn’t say no. So imagine your surprise when you showed up to work the following week to be introduced to the team and your colleagues before the new season was supposed to start to find the incredibly handsome man with even more incredible fingers standing in front of you, jaw slack in shock also. You’d both decided things couldn’t go any further, to keep things professional but the sexual tension between you two overflowed and some sort of friends with benefits arrangement ensued. Just that, sex, whenever either of you needed it. For months, Kylian had showed up at your door at the most random hours of the day, becoming routine for the both of you, something you both enjoyed. It was casual and fun and light and you had no idea when the lines got blurred and it got messy and so so awkward.

“Kylian please-“

You were interrupted by Achraf bursting through the door, the sound of laughter dying on his lips.

“Y/N, you wouldn’t believe Kylian out there training today. It’s like he was playing in one of your high heels, constantly tripping over his feet.”

“I can tell,” you laugh nervously, pointing to the various grazes covering his right leg.

“Dude what’s gotten into you?” Achraf squeezes Kylian’s shoulders and raises his eyebrow. “It’s like you just learned how to use your legs.”

“I dunno bro, guess I’m just a bit out of it.”

“Well get back into it. We’re facing Real tonight and you know how important this game is. I’d be damned if those fuckers beat us again.”

“Yeah…yeah got it.” Kylian replied absentmindedly, his eyes on you intensely. You were praying Achraf didn’t notice but he was too busy rummaging through Kylian’s bag.

“Where are your keys Ky? It’s so cold outside man, I hate Europe sometimes.”

“Side pocket.”

“Aha!” Achraf pulls the keys out with a smile. “You almost done with him doc?”

“Yeah, you both can-“ You start, but Kylian interrupts your sentence with his own answer before you can finish.

“5 minutes.”

“Aight cool,” If Achraf can sense the tension in the room, he is doing a great job of pretending it doesn’t exist. “I’ll warm the car up and wait for you Kyky.” He waves to you as he leaves. “See you tonight Y/N!”

“Bye!” You call back with as much enthusiasm as you can muster before turning to pack your stuff up to leave.

“You can’t ignore me forever Y/N.” Kylian steps towards you and takes your wrist so you have no choice but to turn to face him.

“Yes I can. This thing,” you wave your hand in the space between the two of you. “It’s over Ky. God it wasn’t even supposed to go this far. I have job to do first, before anything else.”

“How was I supposed to know I’d fall for you Y/N?”

“We decided neither of us were going to.” You hissed, pulling your hand away from his. “We decided this, together, me and you, it was supposed to be just sex. No feelings Kylian, just. sex. How can we mix feelings in with all of this? I am your physio first, I’m here to take care of you-“

“Let me take care of you Y/N.”

“A relationship cannot work Kylian. I’ve been here 3 months. The tabloids get even a scent of us being together, they’ll connect dots that don’t exist and somehow assume I slept with you to get this job. You don’t understand what it’s like Kylian, they’ll tear me apart, I worked too hard for this. Any feelings you have for me, anything I have for you-“

“You have feelings for me?”

Shit. Your mouth was moving a mile a minute you didn’t even realise you may or may not have exposed yourself.

“I didn’t-“

“Y/N do you love me too?” Kylian looks at you with hopeful eyes, the dimple in his left cheek slowly growing deeper as his smile widens, taking your silence as the answer he is looking for. “You love me.”

“I-“

“You love me Y/N. Say it.”

“Kylian, I can’t love you.” Your eyes begin to water and you hate yourself for being so sensitive. “You can’t love me. You can love anybody-“

“You aren’t anybody to me Y/N.” He lifts his hand to your cheeks and rubs the skin softly. “I want to be with you Y/N. Beyond the fucking, beyond the 2am booty calls and quickies in my car behind the stadium. I want to take you out, I want to hold your hand, I want to stay the night and wake up next to you. I want to belong to only you and you me. I know I made it awkward telling you I loved you when I did but I’m sorry I can’t hide how I feel anymore. This more than a friendship, more than sex, I’m in love with you. And I know you feel the same.”

You dip your head. “It won’t work.” You whisper.

“Says who?” He whispers back, dipping his head to your level so his lips meet yours in a sweet kiss. You want to pull back, everything is telling you to pull back, kissing him now will definitely let him know how you feel, it’s all too much, too soon, but you can’t help but hold onto his neck, deepening the kiss as his hands grasp desperately on your tshirt, biting at your bottom lip. You sigh and open up for him, his tongue meeting yours as your bodies press impossibly close against each other.

“Let me love you Y/N.” He says into your mouth. “Please, let me love you.” You pull back and rest your forehead against his, both your chests heaving as though you’d played a full 90 minute game.

“I’m scared Ky. I can’t lose my career, I love you, I do. But I’m scared.”

“Open your eyes baby.” You didn’t even realise they were shut. You peel them open slowing to find Kylian’s eyes boring into yours lovingly. “I got you. Always. That won’t happen.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.” He smiles, reaching for your lips with his again. And for the first time in the two weeks since you ended things with him, you felt completely happy again.

This could work. It will work. You had Kylian, it would be okay.

——-

Remember to drop me an ask if you have a prompt x

#football fanfic #mbappe fic #mbappe #kylian mbappe fluff #kylian mbappe fanfic #kylian mbappe #kylian mbappe fic #kylian mbappe x you #kylian mbappe x reader #mbappe x reader #footballer x reader #mbappe fanfic #mbappe imagine #kylian mbappe imagine #football imagine

[eatmangoesnekkid]

I accidentally deleted your question—but my best feature, if I read your question properly, is that I don’t take too many things too seriously. I try not to live so much in my head and fully live and play more in my body no matter what may be going on and know that I am safe and held in my experience. Constantly living in the exhaustive tasks of thinking, analyzing, and processing create a level of 'noise' within the female body that inhibits it from achieving deep regenerative rest, the quality of rest that I center in my everyday life. We craft high-quality rest in our lives, when and when the clouds of grief or loss sneak in out of nowhere, our bodies instinctively know that they are capable of restoring, rejuvenating, and regenerating. Everything I do in life, I do it for our foremothers who did not have the time, rest, peace, or space to receive these higher teachings of how to thrive in a female body because they were too busy trying to survive.

My heart tends to stay lighter than most. I am always jumping, twirling, and sassy-ing, and finding new openings and depth in my body instead of deferring to my head for solutions. Having that feature is an ongoing love story, I find! I see life as transient and fleeting so I am often aware of my own impending death (that sounds so morbid and terrible to read in words, but it's true).

Five percent of our conscious mind influences and directs our daily life, but 95 percent of our unconscious influences and directs our day-to-day actions and creates our reality. In other words, we must begin to believe at the unconscious level that we deserve the very best in this lifetime--a beautiful healthy body or a great love affair-and naturally and instinctively begin to birth it. If we have a womb (or energetically womb if surgically removed), we have even greater birthing power.

...a positive perception about whatever you are going through life is incredibly regenerative and impactful...rebuilding your subconscious mind is key.

I unconsciously tend to ground myself in the truth that one day I'm going to die, which allows things roll off my shoulders easier and gifts my body with more LIFE. I am sincere in my desire to enjoy my time while I’m on this earth plane in this physical vessel no matter what.

I am a lila woman therefore I tend to fuck a lot…."make love with life," is what I'm talking about...giggles! :)

We have to wake up from the amnesia we have fallen into and remember what it means to be female upon the earth and what our purpose is: to make love with life. I am always "making love," doing what makes me feel fully alive in my tissues. And when you live a life of "lovemaking" --bringing the energy of love into nearly everything you do, then everyone and everything benefit.

We have to be deliberate in divinely planting seeds of joy into our everyday lives because a life that's growing and elevating will also have challenges and tons of things to check off the to-do list. Therefore, if I’m cooking, I’m usually having a good time and finding something to laugh about while doing so. If I am making love in a bed, I’m in it with all my vulnerable heart and soul for the life and breath of me. If I'm about to jump into a cold pool --which helps to relieve any inflammation in the body and stimulate the vagus nerve, I do so while leading with love and deep breathing way into gratitude for the regenerative moment and I dare not complain. If I'm biking in the cold rain to dance class, I start singing my favorite song at the moment out loud. If I’m pole dancing—the same mathematics apply. I’m the one moaning on the pole to usurp greater strength in a difficult moment. I perceive myself in all my experiences, in love, as love, transmutation as a lived experience. Because we are here to do amazing things and have aims and objectives in life, but we are also here to feel really delicious in our bodies and lives while reaching them in real time and get our bodies luscious and well

....God is in the present moment.

Not taking the present moment in front of us for granted gives birth to a fluid matrix of limitless possibilities. Some people feel very comfortable and safe listing all the ways and reasons they are limited. But you can create a warm beautiful container that allows you to regenerate and create new narratives which by definitation makes you limitless. All that childlike excitement that awakens and creates more tingles and internal space and lubrication as a result of you feeling like more is possible beyond your current experience will help you to break through the brittle and cold, the mental fog and body fatigue, and the frustrations and lack.

the more you hate your body, the more your body becomes a thing to hate...in order words, energy impacts matter, how you think matters and become matter.

I have not always been the way I am. I grew up pretty left-brain and always in my head calculating and have degrees in accounting and science. Something major shifted in my tissues when I had my kundalini awakening in a forest almost 17 years ago while alone. I l do believe it was a kind of mother wit or deeply cervical mother's love...I'm still trying to find the proper descriptive words. After that moment, I became more lighthearted, an old soul and youthful spirit emerged greater than I had ever known myself to be. After that surreal experience in the forest, even though I was still climbing my way out of struggle and lack frequencies, I would play and twirl and get back into my body and experience sweetness and bliss no matter what foolishness I was going through--the heart of a child/lighthearted energy. An orgasmic frequency. A great death a great love story. Sincerely living with a higher frequency beyond what my life was actually reflected in my life instigated my quantum leap. I saw the scarcity around me an initiations and not permanent fixed states. I always knew one day I would transcend. It's like Donna Summer said something to the effect of "when you have something great, it's only a matter of time." I would going through the craziest times but had an attitude where I refused to wait to enjoy my life--what was in front of me, and would be hula hooping and giggling to release any stuck energy from my heart and belly. That's the spirit I felt in me while working 55 hours per week at a job I hated most days and in a relationship that was imploding. There are sacred times in life where life is just hard and you have to do what needs to be done while still discovering pleasurable ways to adore life as it is and where it is going.

More than "woman" I sense myself as a fairy woman—Priestess, Temple and Wisdom Keeper, Seer, and Medicine woman from the Lover-Warrior template and Mother lineage I channel and translate from. I'm deeply rootsy with dirt on the bottoms of my feet which builds immunity and a self-cultivated larger capacity, as devotee to Kundalini, the Shakti fire, that deep cervical love. I participate in life through my own body and I am not hijacked by the limitations of my mind or this world. I certainly have proud unifying moments where I weep and howl alongside the rest of the world in kinship and what’s also true is that I’m not of this world like one of my divine mentors "Sun Ra" spoke and am unwilling to miss out on the here and now most days.

...your warmth of love is essential...warmth = love....and heat is always essential for repair and regeneration. and there is no time and space...everything is possible.

I let the world’s wickedness ignite my fire and heart and discover the wickedness living in me lurking in the shadows that needs to be integrated. I drop timelines and tend to the ancient-future projections. These are some my best features. Life is my mirror. I hope I answered your question right —your words were beautiful! Poetic! Great writer....I was so stunned by your language that I hit the wrong button. Thank you Anonymous! 💜 —India

[vivianquill]

Zedaph was ever so fascinated with the mer that Impulse had found washed up on the beach near their house. How couldn't he be? Science knew more about space then the depths of the ocean, after all. It almost wasn't surprising to find out that merpeople were real.

It might have been a touch of medical malpractice to hop him up on painkillers meant for dolphins, but it wasn't like Zedaph had any painkillers for merpeople lying around, and with the sheer amount of lacerations and the broken wrist and the bruised and possibly broken ribs, he had to give the mer something or it would have most definitely been medical malpractice. And extremely cruel.

Zedaph might be a bit of an unethical scientist, but he wasn't cruel.

The first time he saw the mer, it had been when Skizz had torn him away from his lab down to one of the smaller rehab rooms that was normally reserved for overflow patients because of how out of the way it normally was. Skizz hadn't said much more that there was a 'really hurt animal' and that he'd need a rescue kit and how was Zedaph supposed to say no? It had been too quick for him to realize that there really should have been a team already on this cause technically Zedaph was off duty right now, but sometimes more than one animal came in, especially when the storms had been bad.

Impulse had been waist deep in the pool, bloody water lapping up over the tiles. For a moment, Zedaph hadn't been able to see the other figure in the water with Impulse, and his body had flushed cold with the thought of all that blood belonging to Impulse--

And then he saw the tail fluke break the surface. Impulse had a hold on the thing in a catch pole, keeping it submerged and away from himself as it struggled. That wasn't good. It might hurt itself, or Impulse.

Zed dropped to his knees at the edge of the pool, opening up the medical kit, "Impulse, what happened? Are you hurt anywhere?"

"No, no, it's just the--" Impulse cut off as the mer thrashed again, drawing Zedaph's eyes.

He had to pause for the precious moments it took him to look at what was in front of him. To really look. It was hard to see in the reddish water, almost impossible to tell where the scarlet of blood ended and where the ruby of scales began. But-- he could see the eyes as red as fire coral, full of what could only be fear, and the torn up gills working overtime along it's neck and chest. He could see the blond hair, matted with seaweed and sand, and--

"I found him washed up, all tangled in a fishing net. He's cut up in a lot of places and I think his right wrist is broken. I-- You can fix it, right?"

"I-- yeah. Maybe." Zedaph shook himself, "We need to stop the bleeding first. Skizz, can you help Impulse wrangle?"

Zed sorted through the thankfully well organized box of supplies, pulling out a suture set and waterproof bandages and-- after a moment-- a dose of painkillers. He'd thankfully grabbed a dolphin kit, and the merperson looked to be about the size of one. Zedaph didn't know if he was a conscious breather like one either, so dolphin meds it was. Until Zed knew more about him, at least.

It was a very tense job, sewing up the worst of the cuts in the merperson's skin and sticking bandages over the rest of the cuts and splinting his wrist. Zedaph would do a much more thorough examination of him once the painkillers kicked in and they'd all had a long moment to calm down and once the worst of the danger was passed.

Zedaph also wanted to wait and let the water clear of blood, for everyone's benefit. He knew some marine creatures got more aggressive if there was blood in the water. And all that muck in the water couldn't be helping the creature's ability to breathe. But Impulse had said he'd been able to breathe air too? Even though he had gills.

Again, this would require more observation to figure out.

The third time Zedaph had to do an examination of the mercreature, the three of them were there-- Impulse, Skizz, and himself. He was incredibly grateful for that fact-- and for Skizz's reflexes-- When the mer lunged at them with a snap and almost took a couple of Zedaph's fingers off. The only thing that'd stopped a bloody end for Zedaph's hand was a catch pole shoved between the mer and his tasty tasty flesh.

Zedaph had inspected the bite mark later. He'd seen the other one that the mer had mangled, but it was another thing entirely to see it happen right in front of him. The pole was made of stuff strong enough to survive a crocodile's bite, and yet--

Lets just say that it wasn't reusable after that examination.

Fascinating indeed.

#zedaph #tangotek #team zits #team zits au #viviwrites #emberfish au #dont mind me #this one is pretty early in the timeline #but i simply couldn't help myself #merman au #medical care #injury tw #stitches tw #miscommunication #language barrier

[animehouse-moe]

GUND-ARM: A Ray Of Hope

So, definitely a lot going on with the episode, but I've got to start off with the little promotional video they did for the new company. Incredibly cute and actually impressive how well they animated it. The tine of green around Aerial from the green screen. The slight desync between Aerial and Suletta. The off-key singing, the background noise from animals. There's a lot of effort put into making the quality of the video seem low, which is pretty impressive in a way.

A quick interlude before the meat of the episode however, featuring Suletta and her mother. I do feel really bad for Suletta, because she just wants to feel safe and loved, rather than discerning the truth from her mother's words.

But unfortunately Prospera and Suletta are on different wavelengths, as is evident in Prospera's comment about people attacking Gundams.

There really is something that feels sinister to Prospera's words. She's taking Suletta's passion and desire for love from her mother and twisting it to the benefit of her plot, which is hard to experience when viewers get to see it as that rather than how Suletta is processing it.

As a side note I feel like that's something they've done really well. Typically it can be hard to understand things from the perspective of a character when you see them as something else entirely, but I feel like GWitch has done a really solid job with that, though I can't quite put my finger on why.

Anyways, the real content of the episode starts as Shaddiq begins his attempt to schmooze the girls to get in on GUND-ARM, and overall I think it's a compelling piece to the story that works. Sure, it's already happened twice in different capacities, but Miorine is Delling's daughter, and Suletta has the best and potentially only "accepted" Gundam currently. It's a gold mine that everyone wants a piece of.

What I find interesting though is he's the first with agency out of all the contenders. He goes against his adoptive father's ideals and provides a fresh angle in the contention of Gundams in this world.

And I mean, it both fits his character and works. He's been passive the entire time we've known him as character, letting everyone else do the heavy lifting. And at the same time, trying to seize Aeriel through direct means has proven to fail countless times, so Shaddiq is certainly finding himself on the right track.

I do enjoy this final scene with Shaddiq though, as once more he allows others to do the work for him. He has an interesting emotion lingering on his face though. It's a bit hard to put into words, but to me it feels almost like rumination. He's definitely deep in thought because he doesn't move the cup anywhere, and casting his eyes downward make it feel like a more negative thought process. He talked about a prior business affair with Miorine when they were younger, so it could be that he's lamenting over what could have been since she denied his involvement. Regardless, it's a nice touch, and presents an interesting tidbit, all the girls have strongly isolated personalities. The smug "you get what you deserve", the empathetic "I feel bad for her", the enthuastic "don't worry we'll cheer her up!", and the cold and calculated business personality.

The other bit from this episode was the politics of the Earth house. I really, really enjoy the different perspectives and worldviews that this small little group possess. They've all been exposed to varying influences and challenges, so they all come out with different opinions and ideas. Yeah, they definitely have overlap, but at the same time, an Earthian that doesn't want to stand out and is somewhat placative to Spacians is in direct opposition to another Earthian on the same issue. It's not a black and white image made by these characters, nor is it really even that gray. There's lots of approaches and understandings that sell the politics and ideals of the world incredibly well. Given how some series handle the concepts of racism/xenophobia/etc, The Witch From Mercury really is proving to provide a great measuring stick for other storytellers.

I just really love it as an emotional piece to the story. It shows how prejudice and war has fractured communities and peoples, without getting into traumatizing or terrible actions to prove it. It's a rare case of words speaking just as loud as actions, and I think it works great for kids that are trying to lead a normal life at school. They're not trying to delve deep into painful memories, but rather make the most of the present and provide change.

All that said, I'm really curious to see where this next episode takes us. There's potential for Prospera and Bel to play more active roles since they're under Suletta and Miorine now, but that all depends on the outcome from the changes Shaddiq made now.

#the witch from mercury #g witch #gundam the witch from mercury #suletta mercury #witch from mercury #gundam suisei no majo #mobile suit gundam #gundam

[monstersdownthepath]

Lord of Vengeance and Cold: Kostchtchie, the Deathless Frost

CR 26

Chaotic Evil Huge Outsider

Bestiary 4, pg. 48-49

Let's clear up the most important bit first: There's actually two official pronunciations for this repugnant Demon Lord's name, so use whichever one you see fit: KOSH-chuh-chai, or kosh-TIK-ti-kai. I prefer the first, as it's closer to his real-world folkloric inspiration in Koschei the Deathless, with whom he shares far more than just a name. Unlike his real-world inspiration, though, Kostchtchie (which I'll be shortening to Kostch from now on) actually DID eventually run afoul of Baba Yaga, and what happened is likely to surprise no one. Already a powerful and feared warlord, Kostch had conquered every enemy he had ever faced except the looming specter of death, and demanded that Baba Yaga make him immortal. Rather than slaying him outright for his impolite request, refusing him service, or transforming him into an unliving yet unaging material, the Queen of Witches was for some reason moved to grant him his request... but, as these stories go, not in the way he wanted.

She tore apart his soul, twisted his body, and broke his mind. Being turned into a statue would have, perhaps, been more merciful.

Portions of his soul were sealed inside of a torc which, while sustaining him like a lich's reliquary, could also be used to command him. The body he was proud of became infused with the essence of the Abyss to turn him into the demonic brute Baba Yaga saw him as. When these torments concluded, she left him to pick up the shattered remains of his ego. Given that she immediately discarded the Torc for someone else to find, granted him demonic resilience and might, and fermented his hatred for giants into a hatred for humanity and turned him from a warlord into a force of nature, it's difficult to say if Baba Yaga did any of this to punish him, or as part of a plan to punish everyone else for allowing such a man to exist. Perhaps, like many of her more eccentric actions, she did it on a whim, or perhaps she did it as part of a plan for the future. Kostch doesn't care one way or another; all he desires now is vengeance, and achieving this vengeance requires nothing less than the destruction of Baba Yaga and everything she's ever created... along with every single other powerful woman in existence out of pure misogynistic spite.

Fun fact: Kostch is such a raging woman-hater that it actually grants him mechanical benefit. He has Favored Enemy, granting him +4 to a suite of checks and rolls against humans (not Humanoids! specifically humans) and Giants, but this bonus is doubled to +8 against women. It's more than a little funny (in a miserable sort of way) to me that he's so pathetically hate-filled because a woman 'dared to best him,' and I have much more to say on the subject--some of which involves pointing out the size of his arms and the jokes I could make on it--but to go further with the joke would take away from Kostch's legitimately threatening kit. So, let's take a look...

Kostch calling himself "Deathless" is not an empty boast. Unlike pretty much every other Outsider in existence, Kostch did not actually die, nor has he once been slain during his ascension to the rank of Demon Lord. He was transformed into a demonic shape by Baba Yaga, and fled to the Abyss willingly to fill the cracks in his body and mind with its essence, going from human to mutant to demon without his soul fleeing its corporeal vessel even once. He retains his (heavily twisted) human appearance, a perfect memory of his life from before, and all the skills he once had, and all of these worry other demons, because if he could do it, maybe more people could. While he's incredibly young for a Demon Lord at only 2500 years old, others are nonetheless wary of him because he ascended to his Lord rank so quickly, and because of his relatively short tenure, very few are aware of the full extents of his power or what tricks he may yet be hiding from them.

"Frost" isn't an exaggeration of his talents either (please keep all 'best served cold' jokes to yourself). Though he has no means to penetrate Cold Resistance or Immunity, he has no real need due to the quality of his frost spells: At-will Cone of Cold to blast a 60ft area with 15d6 Cold damage whenever he wishes, a 3/day Polar Ray to shoot a single target for 25d6 Cold damage and some paltry Dex drain, and most dangerously Polar Midnight 1/day to engulf an area in freezing, murderous darkness. That last one is why he has no reason or need to pierce Cold resistance; if he did, he couldn't drop that spell into his own space and punish anyone who tried to stand and Full-Attack him while safe from the majority of the spell's effects. Anyone who doesn't move at all on their turn while they're inside Polar Midnight is instantly, unavoidably frozen over, trapped in a layer of ice until someone frees them (as they're rendered helpless). Since Kostch has a permanent Freedom of Movement and can Greater Teleport at will as a spell-like ability, he has no issue freeing himself if he ends up hoist by his own petard in the spell's area... or he can avoid it entirely and just take a move action each round while keeping up his DPS via Greater Vital Strike.

Even creatures immune to Cold can still be trapped by Polar Midnight's freezing effect, or his 1/day Mass Icy Prison, a spell that can potentially paralyze or entangle an entire party at once. Even if one succeeds the save, they're still entangled and taking 26 Cold damage every round until something scrapes the ice from them. Once a victim is frozen over or, hell, even when they're perfectly fine and not really inconvenienced by his magic, Kostch enters the fray to do what he REALLY wants: Hit you over and over again with a really, really big hammer. Sorcery is fine and all, it can be convenient when someone won't hold still, and his endless supply of thrown boulders (2d8+13) are alright for buzzing annoyances at a range, but Kostch began his life as a warlord beating people to death with a hunk of iron on a stick, and by god has he gotten really good at it over the years.

This is no mere hunk of iron, though, this is a +5 Adamantine Icy Burst Warhammer sized for a Huge creature and wielded by a creature with a 15ft space and reach. It weighs well over a ton and appropriately hits like a car upwards to four times a round, every blow dealing 3d6+24 +1d6 Cold damage (+4 vs humans and Giants, +8 vs women)... Or, rather, 3d6+40, since Kostch's lore block states he more or less ALWAYS uses his Power Attack, taking a meager -8 penalty to his stacked attack rolls in favor of more damage, which works well with his warhammer's x3 damage if it critically strikes. If he can't Full-Attack, he can use Greater Vital Strike to throw out a single devastating swing for 12d6+40 +1d6 Cold damage! Given that he can wield that intimidating weapon in just one hand, his other hand is open to weave in a single slam each round for 1d8+19 damage, but we'll get to why that's much better than it looks in just a moment.

It should be said that Kostch has a particularly jarring ability: Vengeful Strike. Once per round, he can AoO any creature that hits him in melee. It's a very simple ability that nonetheless allows him to keep piling on damage even outside of his turn, akin to the Legendary Actions of 5e! Compared to most Demon Lords, Kostch's statblock is rather plain, but some of the abilities he DOES have are doozies with multiple moving parts. The first is Crushing Blow, something he can use once a round with his hammer. It's one of those abilities he must declare before he rolls his attack and is wasted if he misses, but given that he's got a +53 (usually +45 due to Power Attack) to the first attack roll he makes with it a round, he's unlikely to miss anything but the most ridiculously buffed Heavy Armor + Tower Shield Enjoyer. Upon hitting with the Crushing Blow, the attack ignores both hardness and DR AND he gets to make a free trip attempt (+52) versus the victim at no risk to himself and without any restrictions based on size. A victim crushed by the blow also has to make a DC 44 Fortitude save or be stunned for 1 round and staggered for 1d4 more, but even if they succeed they're staggered, which can severely cut down on their ability to fight back or escape him. A major problem, because like most Demon Lords he's only vulnerable to a scant handful of attacks (DR 20/Cold Iron, Epic, and Good, and 30 Regeneration only shut down by deific or Mythic sources), attacks you really want to be able to throw out multiple of every round. There's no per-day limit to his Crushing Blow and no immunity clause built in if you succeed your save, so he can just keep using it round after round to stun and stagger so long as he keeps hitting successfully.

The second and objectively the way funnier important ability in his kit is Clutch Foe, which he can use as part of the Grab attached to his slam attack. When he uses just one hand to grapple a Medium or smaller target, he can choose to lift that creature off their feet and hold them in his grip. This has the side-effect of making his grapple easier to escape, imposing a -20 penalty to his grapple checks... which means it goes from +56 to +36, giving him a decent chance to keep hold of most martial characters and almost certainly lets him clutch casters. Each round as a swift action, Kostch can then choose one of three options: Crush his foe, dealing his slam damage plus an extra 1d8+28 damage; throw his foe in any direction he wants (which is treated as a bull rush, a maneuver he gets +54 to); or the last and most hysterical option: wielding his victim as an improvised weapon. A Medium creature wielded in this manner deals 3d6+19 (weapon sized for a Huge creature + his Str mod) damage to anything it hits, and the victim themselves takes half that damage back, doubling the number of creatures being harmed every time Kostch swings around his new Club of Screaming Pain.

If you think it's unlikely he'll be able to hold onto someone long enough to use them as a bludgeon, remember that he has more than a few ways to render someone helpless via icy entanglement... And also Power Word Stun. Or he can just teleport or Time Stop and walk to the weakest person in the party and grab them like a squeaky toy. I appreciate that he has Catch Off-Guard to make sure he's not penalized for attacking with an improvised wizard, but if I were to improve his kit, I'd give him the Two-Weapon Fighting line to allow him iterative attacks with a grappled foe. I just think it'd be funny.

You can read more about him here.

#Monster Spotlight #CR 26 and up #Lords of Sin Month #Pathfinder #dungeons and dragons

[anjaelle]

White Light | Part II

Characters: Ghost!ATJ + Black Female!Reader Rating: T+ (For language. Again...pretty tame so far) Word Count: 2.8K Summary: You've learned three very important things: 1) Ghosts are apparently real. 2) They can touch you if they're determined enough. 3) They will live with you for months and not pay rent, but reap all the benefits. A/N: Thanks for everyone that read part one. It would be super encouraging if people who read my story actually reblogged/commented on it, as it's hard to gauge what I could improve on or add more of without feedback.

[PART I] | [PART III] | [Masterlist]

--

The year was 2002.

He'd just moved to the city from England, eager to make his mark in the US with his band, Crimson Zombie. It was a shit name, admittedly--they had a plan to work on it. They'd heard from friends of friends that there was a bubbling underground music scene, and a couple of pretty damn good venues with well-known patrons. They were a group of four incredibly over-eager Uni dropouts who jumped first and asked questions later. The housing market wasn't too bad, considering the fact that everyone was trying to get the hell out of the downtown area after 2001. They had to couch surf for a couple of weeks before finding a space they could all live in on a budget. It wasn't much, but it was something.

He wasn't the lead of the band, a fact he was perfectly content with. He preferred standing in the back with his bass guitar, getting lost in the noise of the crowd and the melody without the pressure of looking perfect while he did it. That responsibility was left to his best mate Gavin, who had the looks, charisma, and talent as the frontman to make the band memorable in a sea of guitar playing white guys.

It took six months for them to gain a small following. And as they transitioned into the new year, they began getting a ton of attention they hadn't expected. Maybe it was the novelty of their Britishness. Maybe they were finding their sound. By the winter of 2003, they were well on their way to signing with an indie label and finally releasing a record.

That's when he met Talia.

Aaron was genuinely surprised when she initially approached him at a gig, since Gavin was usually the one women flocked to, the other guys were way more outgoing, and Aaron was more reserved. She was fresh out of college and working at a coffee shop, but making art on the side. The band tapped her to design their EP covers and merch, and then gave her a cut of the profits. Aaron and Talia grew closer after a few late nights of brainstorming and no-strings-attached fucking. He was beginning to catch feelings, and began to notice the growing animosity Gavin had towards their relationship.

"You don't fall for the groupies," he once said over a bottle of Jameson, "You're fucking mad if you think you'll survive touring. She'll cheat on you the minute your back is turned."

Aaron defended her which led to a shouting match. Gavin didn't speak to him for over a week, but he didn't care. He just knew that he loved her.

It was an unseasonably warm night in March when he plucked up the courage to finally ask Talia to be his girlfriend. They'd just finished an opening set at a sold out show, and were celebrating in their apartment with booze and some assorted party favors the other band mates called in. Ordinarily, Aaron would be right alongside them. But that night, he'd been nervously chain smoking out the living room window as he waited for her to come to the party after her shift at the shop.

He remembered Gavin giving him the cold shoulder all night, and snorting every last bag of coke off of their coffee table well into the evening. He remembered their band mates telling him to slow down before he OD'd. Aaron could hear them arguing from the kitchen, but he kept his eyes trained on Talia's silhouette crossing the street to their apartment building. The arguing moved into the living room. Aaron was about to call down to her from the window. There was a shout, a shove, immense pain in his head.

And then he died.

-x-

"JESUS FUCK!" You screamed, jumping out of bed and rushing to the door. With shaking hands, you managed to pull your front door open and scream out into the hallway, "SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME!"

Then you ran out, clad only in your pajamas and a pair of fuzzy socks.

He sat frozen on the bed, completely unsure of what to do or say to right the situation. From your perspective, a random man just showed up in your apartment and started touching your hair. Admittedly, he was being creepy. He couldn't blame you for being afraid. But he didn't know how to tell you that you were about to look absolutely insane for your accusation. When he came back to his senses, he found himself cradling the hand that touched you. Like it was sacred. It might as well have been.

In your haste to escape the danger of a dead guy, you left your front door wide open. For a moment he contemplated closing it--if he had the strength to anyway. But then he decided that it'd be better to just leave it alone in case you returned.

And you did! Eventually. It took several minutes for you to come back with your neighbors and the building's security guard in tow. He felt immediate guilt when confusion crossed everyone's face, as they peeked around the corner and saw no one there. But you stared right at him with fear etched onto your features. You parted your lips to speak, but nothing came out but a slow shuddering breath.

"They can't see me," he admitted, holding up his hands in an attempt at reassurance, "They can't hear me. It's just you...for some reason."

"No, no, no this can't be fucking happening." He heard you mutter to yourself, holding your head in your hands and turning your back to him. Your neighbors flurried around you to ask you questions about whether you wanted to file a report, and what the perp looked like. Several minutes of babbling passed, and you disappeared into the hallway again, closing the door tightly behind you without passing another glance his way.

It was odd. For the most part he couldn't really recognize anyone, and he was hit with the realization that everyone he knew from the building probably moved away. The feeling of the world moving on without him was still something he had trouble accepting.

Despite the initial shock of being seen, Aaron decided to play it cool. He felt around for his one loose cig that never seemed to disappear, no matter how many times he smoked it. He couldn't taste or smell a goddamn thing, but the fact that he died with one last cigarette in his pocket gave him an ounce of hollow comfort.

"Okay," he sighed to himself, propping his chin in his hand and tucking his cigarette behind his ear, "So...assuming she doesn't immediately move out, I need to figure out a way to explain this to her."

He snorted. He could barely explain this phenomenon to himself, let alone a living woman he's been mildly enamored with for months. He became hyper aware of the fact that the tingling in his hand disappeared after you left, and he wasn't sure if he missed you because of it. Or maybe he just missed you because he could finally talk to you and had so many questions to ask.

In fact, this was the first time he'd spoken to anyone. He instinctively grabbed the phantom cigarette and lit it with the phantom lighter, choosing to enjoy the illusion of relief it brought him.

Would you smell it? You smoked, too, but only rarely. And never cigs. Could you smell his smoke this whole time?

If you could, he decided he was a massive dick.

It was approaching dawn when you returned, and his heart leapt into his throat. Like he was an eager dog awaiting his owner.

Disgusting.

He had to remind himself that he knew you, but you knew nothing about him. Instead, he remained silent, choosing to stand close to the living room window far across the room. Your eyes met, and he noticed that you didn't look so afraid anymore. Instead, he noticed the exhaustion. He had to fight the impulse to voice his concern.

"You don't look so good," he plainly said, scratching the back of his head, anxiously.

You licked your lips and squinted at him, shutting the door behind you.

"You and I need to talk."

You explained to him that you spent hours speaking to your grandmother to make sense of things. You weren't a stranger to the supernatural--your family was full of spiritually sensitive people. But you were convinced that it skipped you. That you wouldn't ever have to deal with the craziness that seemed to follow every woman in your family. Yet here you were, sitting at your dining room table across from a guy who died in your apartment. Despite the slightly nervous nature of his demeanor, you were surprised at the level of calm you were both exuding.

He tucked his cigarette between his teeth and you clocked how unnaturally bright it was, and how slow it burned. You could faintly smell it. But it smelled like someone was smoking in a room down the hall, not right across from you.

You took a deep breath and he licked his lips.

"Ok...what do you wanna know?" He asked, resting his chin on the table.

You didn't expect him to seem so real. So human.

"Do you know you're dead?" You asked. It was a dumb ass question, but he smiled patiently at you and shrugged.

"Yeah. I kinda figured that when I couldn't leave out of the front door anymore. For like a few years."

You swallowed hard at the intensity of his eyes on you and looked down at your hands.

"Have you been watching me this whole time?"

There was a pregnant pause and he hummed to himself.

"I didn't...mean to," he admitted, "But, as you can see, there's not much room in here to avoid you."

"Avoid me?"

He shook his head, "I wasn't trying to get in your way. I was just...here. Can't really be helped, you know? What was I supposed to do?"

You considered this for a moment, then thought back on the conversation that you had with your grandmother a few hours before.

"Why are you still here? Why didn't you move on to the other side?"

He shrugged again, choosing to ruffle his curls in thought. "Fuck if I know. I might be dead but I don't know anything about death and spirits and shit. I was just...a guy. I had a band. I hate being stuck here--or, I used to anyway," his eyes flickered to you for a moment before focusing on the table again, "I just thought I was being punished or something."

The entire time you spoke to him, you had your cell phone on the table recording the conversation. You hoped that it was catching his voice as well as yours, but it was an absolute shot in the dark.

"Punished for what?" You gently pushed.

"Beats me. I was pretty boring when I was alive." His eyes glanced up at you again, but he didn't look away. Instead a slow smile pulled at the corner of his mouth and you felt your face warm up.

"What?"

"Nothing," he chuckled, "It's just nice to have someone to talk to."

You didn't even think about that: How lonely the last few decades must have been before you moved in. How much he missed before he even hit 30. How angry he must have been about his situation.

You sighed deeply, "Do you know what year it is?"

"2022." He stated, plainly. You were surprised.

"How do you know?"

He motioned to the window, referencing a billboard propped on the roof of a building across the street. At the moment, it had a fading image of a thin, blonde woman modeling a pair of very expensive pink stilettos, with a bottle of perfume propped on the heel.

"The time and date are at the bottom," he explained, "I think that's the only thing that's been stopping me from going mad. That, and being able to see life happen outside on the street. That's about it."

You sat in that for a moment, allowing you both to indulge in the comfort of new company and much needed silence. You kept noticing him stealing glances at you, like he was studying your face. You briefly wondered how often he did that before you noticed him.

"Why were you touching me? HOW were you touching me?" You suddenly questioned. He blinked rapidly like he was being pulled out of his own deep thoughts, and you could swear that you saw a blush creep along his cheeks. He cleared his throat.

"It--I...didn't, like--I wasn't really TRYING to touch you. Like, I-I thought...I don't know what the fuck I thought, really."

You blinked at him, but couldn't help the chiding grin that formed on your face by how flustered you seemed to make him, "You know I find that hard to believe, right?"

He blushed a deeper red and rubbed the back of his head again, "I've never been able to do that before. Bloody fuckin' hell, I'm sorry. I promise I wasn't...I'm not a creep. I swear I'm not. I just--fuck me."

You quirked a brow at him, but remained silent as his wide blue eyes seemed to exude a mild panic. He deserved it, since he apparently watched you for months without you knowing. Though you understood that some of it couldn't really be helped, you still wanted to make him squirm a bit.

You should've been madder. Maybe. But taking into account how sweet and anxious he was made you a little more lenient.

It took a moment for him to catch on to the fact that you weren't that angry, and he squinted at you, which made you giggle.

"Are you fucking with me?" He asked with a slight sigh of relief.

You scrunched up your nose at him.

"A smidge. But you and I both know that you deserve it."

As the conversation progressed, the sun began to peek through your window, letting you know that you'd been speaking for hours. Of course, you were exhausted. He obviously didn't need sleep. But concern crossed his features as you rubbed your tired eyes.

"You should get some rest," he said, propping his chin in his hand to watch you carefully, "You've had a long day."

Though you shook your head, you yawned, earning a laugh from Aaron.

"I think you're in denial," he said, standing from the dining room table, "C'mon. Get to bed. I'll be here when you wake up, obviously." He crossed his arms over his chest, and you were suddenly aware of how muscular he was. Or maybe your sleep deprived mind was playing tricks on you. Either way, you blinked your tired eyes slowly at him and pursed your lips.

"Fine, you win, I'll take my ass to bed."

As you dragged your feet across your living room, and collapsed face first into your pillow, a thought occurred to you which had you prop yourself up on your elbows to speak to him.

"I just realized that I asked you 1000 questions, but I never really gave you the chance to ask me anything." You yawned again and rested your head on your folded arms, "You get one question from me before I pass out for good."

At first, you thought he'd reject the offer. He seemed reluctant to ask of anything from you. But then he shoved his hands in his pockets and stared at the ceiling for a moment, thinking of what to say.

"Can you look up something for me on your cell phone?"

He sat beside you on the bed--an eerie experience, considering you couldn't really FEEL him there, though he looked just as real as a normal, living person. As Aaron peeked over your shoulder at your phone screen, his eyes widened in wonder.

"Well shit, that's--wow," he ran his fingers through his hair, "So you just touch the screen part? Like, there's no buttons? At all?"

"Not really."

He whistled, "This is like some Space Odyssey shit."

You were charmed by his enthusiasm and made a note of his nerdiness for a later date.

You typed the name out in google.

As the results showed up, you watched from the corner of your eye as Aaron's jaw worked. A few pictures popped up of the man he knew on stage singing to a massive crowd in Leeds, on a red carpet beside a beautiful, pregnant dark haired woman with sleeve tattoos, and a portrait of him from when he was a teenager.

Gavin Kensington Roth was an English singer-songwriter, producer, and musician who was the lead singer of the band MARCOS.

Born: May 8, 1980 Died: December 31, 2018 Children: Daisy Kensington Roth, Lola Kensington Roth, Brody Kensington Roth Spouse: Natalia "Talia" Jade Kensington Roth (2004-2018)

Before you could finish reading the results, Aaron shot up from the bed, and disappeared into the void.

#jaelle writes #aaron taylor johnson #atj x black!reader #aaron taylor johnson x reader #aaron taylor johnson x black!reader

[the-whumpening]

The Caged Tiger | Part 6

Prev | Masterpost | Next

CW: captivity, referenced torture (sleep deprivation, starvation, forced to fight), dehumanization

-

Nightmares plague Ash for . . . days? Weeks? Time has truly become meaningless to him. A cycle of sick images swim through his mind each night—if it can even be called that—which wake him in a cold sweat. He is run ragged most days, sparring uselessly against Owen; every time he seems to have an upper hand, Owen outsmarts him, outpaces him, outmaneuvers him. With his friends, taking Owen down was almost easy, but alone, even with the benefit of his hybrid form . . . it gets more difficult each time.

Ozmund tries every cruelty at his disposal to elicit the results he wants. Some nights, Ash isn’t allowed to sleep at all; instead, he’s forced to push his body to its limits, exercising until his muscles give way beneath him. On other weeks, he’s given only pale vegetable broth to sustain himself—a punishment, he assumes, perhaps to make him angry enough to fight harder. Even his contact with Faye, the only kind face he’s seen in months, is lessened. Though after she’d bristled with disgust at his tiger form, it almost hurts worse to see her than not. Most days, he sits alone in the dark until Ozmund or Owen drag him to the sparring arena once again. Hsa, too, seems to have disappeared, leaving him utterly alone.

After one particularly rough day of fighting, Ash readily collapses into fitful sleep. But when he awakes, something feels off. The dank, stale air of the dungeon is replaced with a gentle breeze, the crisp scent of pine and earth carried along on the wind. Ash blinks against the bright light. Why’s it so bright? What’s going on? As his senses tune back in to the world around him, he realizes he’s not in his cell anymore.

The heavy weight of the collar around his neck is gone; cool air tickles his throat and soothes the tender skin. Beneath him, the dewy grass caresses his sore, naked body. He scrambles to his feet—no chains, no manacles, no binding magic—and digs his toes into the soft, damp soil. For the first time in what feels like months, he breathes in deeply, his chest expanding to its full limit without restraint. Although his eyes struggle to adjust to the intense sunlight, he glances around himself: lush green trees surround him in every direction, and by his feet, he finds his beloved spear. He snatches it from the ground, clutching it to his chest for a moment like a treasured friend. Am I . . . free? Is this real? Looking at his hands, the burn scars around his wrists are still there. If this was a dream, then surely . . .

“So you’re finally awake, huh?”

His stomach drops low in his gut. Ash spins to face the voice, positioning the spear to protect himself. Owen approaches through the trees, hands held aloft as if calming a wild animal.

"Easy there, big fella. No need to get . . . stabby. I'm here to make a deal."

Suspicious, Ash lowers his spear only partly.

"Close enough, I guess," Owen shrugs. "Listen, this is what you wanted, right? Freedom? One last go with me, and you can have it—"

At the word—freedom—Ash's heart leaps up into his throat. It's too good to be true . . . Why would Owen help me? Why would they let me go?

"—As long as you can catch me. If you do, tear me to shreds, burn my body; do whatever it takes. This whole 'living forever' thing is getting pretty old. Destroy me beyond repair, and maybe I won't come back this time. Then you can go home, or back to your friends, whatever floats your boat. Ozmund will never be the wiser—and we both get what we want."

Of course there would be a catch. Nothing is ever straightforward with Owen. Try as he might, though, Ash can't find a loophole Owen could exploit. And after seeing how little Ozmund values Owen beyond his incredibly hearty constitution, Ash is inclined to believe him. Or perhaps his desperation has simply reached its peak.

Ash clears his throat, his voice raspy from disuse. "And what if I fail?"

"Then we both go back to our miserable lives being lab rats. Look, take it or leave it; it's up to you. And before you think of running off without keeping your end of the bargain, you should know that you can't get out of here without this." He holds up a small silver ring. "Think of it like a magic key—without this ring, you'll be locked in this forest forever."

As much as Ash is distrustful of Owen, he can't deny the appeal of the offer. All he has to do is rely on his instincts—be the hunter he was born to be—and he can finally be free. All his suffering wouldn't be in vain: he's stayed alive long enough to find a way out! Even if the tiny skeptical voice in his head screams in protest . . . he has to try.

"Deal."

After giving Owen a brief headstart, Ash pulls in a deep, cleansing breath. His scent is faint, but easily identifiable—Ash quickly picks up the trail and begins his pursuit. Never has a hunt held such high stakes for him; even living off the land and hunting to survive, he's never felt such intense desperation. I can’t let him get away. I can’t fail this time. Come on, Ash, you can do this.

He stalks the path of boot prints Owen left in the damp earth. Memories ripple through his skin, a searing nostalgic ache; every hunt with Kane, every playful chase with Evius, he can feel it all like the sunlight dappling through the trees. Although the forest is unfamiliar to him, the elements themselves feel like old friends—the towering trees and the prickling grass beneath his feet are companions he’s always known. With that confidence, emboldened by that comfort, he lets his fear roll off of him.

The stretch of his muscles is satisfying and liberating as he leaps into the branches above. Like his tiger ancestors, he prowls the canopy, noting every rustling leaf and snapping twig on the forest floor below. He is calm, collected; his rage has no place here. Not yet, anyway. Not until I find him . . .

As the sun rises higher in the sky, Owen’s scent begins to fade. Just as Ash thinks he’s lost the trail, a voice calls out from deeper in the woods.

“Help! Ash!”

Is that . . . Mouse?!

#whump #whump writing #dnd whump #male whumpee #male whumper #the caged tiger #whumpblr #rublewriting

[denimbex1986]

'It’s always a great year for me when it’s announced that David Tennant is returning to the theatre and especially to Shakespeare and last night I was lucky enough to have a front row seat to the final preview of the new Donmar production of Macbeth.

In recent years, there’s been more of a tendency to find a new way to tell some of these age-old stories and Max Webster’s latest production of the Scottish play has chosen to incorporate a binaural stereo experience for its audience, through the use of headphones, to create a “3D soundscape”.

I admit, I was sceptical about this and not quite sure whether it would work...I was unsure whether it was something that would benefit a full company of actors in such a small space as the 250 seat Donmar. Yet, overall, I enjoyed the experience last night and the positives of the headphones do outweigh the negatives for me...

The mood of a production of Macbeth is key for me and I’ve had mixed experiences of it over the years, but what I loved about this one was the eeriness that is able to be created in that small theatre space and that is certainly aided by the headphones allowing the actors to truly whisper to one another...

...from my front row seat, the raised platform on the central stage meant you were looking up (although not uncomfortably so), which at times had me feeling like I was eavesdropping/lurking; present at moments I shouldn’t be.

Macbeth is a fairly short play and so I liked the choice not to have an interval and instead keep the pace moving...

The company of actors here is very good indeed. There’s a lovely relationship between Cal Macaninch’s Banquo and his son, Rona Morison’s Lady Macduff is compelling in her pivotal moments, Noof Ousellam’s Macduff comes in to his own as we reach the play’s conclusion and I really loved Ros Watt as Malcolm, bringing an empathy in scenes with characters in need of that, but also still projecting a strong leader, ready to take on Macbeth for the Scottish throne...

...Cush Jumbo is fantastic in this role. She gets the balance right between scheming power player and a woman also struggling with her own ghosts and loss and has a convincing connection with Tennant’s Macbeth, no doubt aided by them having worked with each other previously.

Of course, for any Lady Macbeth, there’s one scene the audience is waiting for and I really liked the approach to the “mad” scene in this production. I do still find the set-up of it, within the play itself, frustrating (and the 2021 Almeida production remains the only one that has provided much needed context for why she seems to go from cold and clinical to emotionally fractured so suddenly), but the performance from Cumbo was one of the best I’ve seen. It’s not over the top, there’s no dramatics. It’s a very understated depiction of someone who has become emotionally unmoored and seems lost in their own world of loss and guilt. I found her to be quite haunting.

And then of course, there is David Tennant. This is the 6th Shakespeare play I’ve seen him in and for me, there’s just no other actor like him when it comes to bringing these ancient texts to life for a contemporary audience. The language doesn’t change, but he has a way of embodying these roles and breathing life in to them, that you just get it. Even if you don’t understand every turn of phrase, you understand the person, their motivations and their turmoil. He brings Shakespeare to life in a simply magical way and this production is just another example of that.

Tennant’s Macbeth is so many things in a short space of time. He’s incredibly charismatic, charming, funny, vulnerable, ruthless, sexy (yes, I said it) and animalistic. It’s a real powerhouse of a performance and being so close to him in moments was a real thrill. Before Macbeth is crowned, he lies down, prostrate on the stage, head turned to the side and it meant he was staring straight at me, which was certainly intense! You can feel how at home he is on that stage and he commands every moment, from intense fights, to whispered monologues in moments of vulnerability. It’s thrilling to experience.

I’ve seen some Macbeths where it’s portrayed much more that the driving force behind their fiendish deeds is Lady Macbeth, with her husband almost caught up in it before he realises it, which I never really believe. Yet in Webster’s production, Tennant’s Macbeth is all-in almost immediately. You can see the thought of that level of power thrills him and when he sees Malcolm early on and voices (in whispered voice to us) about the need to step over him, it’s clear what he wants. The backing of his wife merely emboldens him and even when he says they should not proceed, I didn’t really believe he was serious, which isn’t always the case with this play.

As is the case with every Shakespeare play I’ve seen him in thus far, it’s often some of the subtle choices Tennant makes that I love. On the discovery of the slain King, as Jumbo’s Lady Macbeth collapses with emotion, Tennant’s Macbeth gave her such a subtle, but clear signal through the simple tilt of the head and a raised eyebrow, which seemed to say, reign it in a bit. I couldn’t see her face to gauge her response, but it was just one moment I really liked.

There’s also the choice he makes to take of the crown and drop it on the table next to him, before he starts arranging the murders of those he sees as a threat to him. I appreciated the sense that Macbeth was not King in that moment, but the soldier, planning battle tactics instead and perhaps a part of him didn’t want to be doing such things as King too.

Then there were two scenes that really wowed me. Macbeth’s monologue in Act 5 Scene 5 was breath-taking to watch. Alone, on the castle wall, looking out, in reflective mood and with the ability to not worry about needing to project his voice, we really hear Macbeth contemplating life and the emotional depth Tennant brought out of those words, some a mere breath of a whisper, was spellbinding – “Life’s but a walking shadow; a poor player, That struts and frets his hour upon the stage, And then is no more: it is a tale Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, Signifying nothing.” Just a magical moment. It might have even brought a tear to my eye.

The other is the culmination of the play, as Macbeth begins his final battle, taking on other soldiers, some played by others in the ensemble, others we have to imagine, before coming face to face with Macduff. This is when Tennant really lets loose. He’s like a man possessed, as we see the violent ferociousness of Macbeth the soldier. The way he moved around the stage with such primal confidence was very exciting to witness, especially in such an intimate setting as the Donmar stage.

I also loved his choices in that final confrontation with Macduff; the way he taunts him, refusing to surrender and goading him and I could see this being a part of the production that might vary night to night, depending on Tennant’s mood, as it felt very instinctive, which again is part of the gift he has a stage actor. I admit, part of me was rooting for Macbeth! That’s a first!

So, overall, I was thoroughly captivated by this production, far more than I’ve experienced at some other stagings over the years. I appreciate the director and creative team wanting to stage something a bit different through the incorporation of the headphones and soundscape and in large part, it really worked for me.

... this is another superb theatre outing for David Tennant. Anyone who has seen him on stage knows how special an experience it is and this is no different. He’s truly one of the very best actors and when it comes to Shakespeare, there’s no one who does it better in my opinion. It’s truly where he belongs and I feel privileged every time I have the opportunity to see it.'

#David Tennant #Cush Jumbo #Max Webster #Donmar Warehouse #Macbeth #Cal Macaninch #Rona Morison #Ros Watt #Noof Ousellam

[dairy-farmer]

Hi, this might be kind of a dumb question, but would you ever write about sasuke as tim drake again? Ever since I read "heroes come back," I've been pondering what Sasuke's relationship with the batfam would be, especially after dropping the "I've learnt my lesson about following strange men who offer me things in exchange for my body" line. And how your Sasuke!Tim lines up with the Tim you write about and in what ways that changes his relationships, and in what ways it doesn't.

not a dumb question at all!!!!! i have a fondness for all my fics including this one which i consider to be one of the most 'out there' concepts simply because of the whole crossover mashup haha!!

unfortunately i don't have any real or concrete plans about a continuation but there is a big door open for lots of possibilities that i never put down!!! simply because i couldn't find a way to incorporate them.

i do feel like sasuke's relationship is a lot like canon tim's- in that it's very unique in the nature of it.

by the time that sasuke aka "tim" comes into their lives he's had about a decade to really grind down and process A LOT of the trauma he carried over from his last life. (tim's therapists know that tim is traumatized from the events he witnessed as a child and they know that healing is slow but tim also presents with a lot of neuroses- anxiety, antisocial tendencies, paranoia, ptsd. sasuke's issues run deep and i think they pick up on it). sasuke, for the most part, died untreated from a lot of what he suffered and endured. in fact, it's the reason for his death because he never truly allowed himself to open up and let others in. when he's reborn and realizes he's on his own it's sort of the kick in the ass he's always needed to begin the journey to get better (along with the fact that the world he's in now has the facilities to help treat someone like him, i imagine that bruce has been petitioning for better mental health safety nets (especially ones for children) for a long time and sasuke is one of the many people to now benefit from it). sasuke in this verse truly does want to heal and get better and his relationships reflect that.

his relationship with the bats isn't quite strained, there's no coldness between them. but it took a while to get to the familiarity level of comfort. sasuke first respects them and their work and comes to genuinely love and care for them second. but it's his decade of work that ultimately helps him let them in and bond with them as a family through that also takes a while it's what allows him to be 'friendly' enough to befriend young justice. sasuke isn't good at things like socializing or interpersonal things but that's okay because batman isn't either and dick is more than willing to bare the burden of carrying on a conversation with his new little brother. but i feel like their road definitely is a long one because sasuke comes to them incredibly independent.

sasuke has still maintained his internalized maturity as an adult even though he has the mental processing and reactions of a teenager. sasuke is someone who was only ever responsible for himself and when in a team he was always the commander or the one directly under the commander. he definitely is set in his ways like an old man (read: like bruce lol). and while he admired the work bruce did he also had a...bit of a hard time adapting to it. ninja, i believe, kind of have an honor code when it comes to civilians. like only the worst kind of ninja throw their weight around with civilians and sasuke, who is still recovering from poor self-image and self-hatred, wouldn't really feel comfortable doing it. hence him adapting 'civilian' styles of fighting when dealing with most people, fighting like how he'd see farmers in disputes or bar owners would with drunks. the bats see that as him not really wanting to hurt people- until the opponent is someone clearly trained or a threat well then the gloves come off.

sasuke is definitely not fighting at the level he did before though. mainly because of differences in his body's muscle-skeletal structure but also there's no chakra present in the world. sasuke could be thrown through a wall as a genin and yeah it would hurt but he'd live. if that happened to him as robin he'd just die. his bones would break, organs would rupture- chakra provided a kind of padding to protect from hits but also help him hit harder. sasuke also notes how his perception is slower. the closest that a 'normal' person has to ninja perception is deadshot- like that's the level that the lowest ranking genin was at. so sasuke is definitely experiencing a big power descale. as a result he'd rely really heavily on techniques he's mastered, espionage, trap laying, etc. like tim, he's definitely not the strongest or fastest on the team- he has to plan ahead and outsmart many of his opponents, pulling trump cards and tricks. i had this idea that never ended up in the fic about the family catching tim constantly working at a kind of 'signature move' where he'd throw batarangs and then try to change their trajectory while they were still in the air- a trick notably developed by itachi that i believe sasuke had once asked him to teach him (?) but he never did. so sasuke is reverse engineering it as a kind of homage to his brother, eventually, he's successful and it becomes sort of quirk about his fighting style that's recognizable along with his bostaff.

among the bats sasuke is a very quiet and patient person, that anger that he'd had all his past life has more or less simmered down (which is why his 'rivalry' with damian isn't met with mutual aggression and more annoyance from his end when damian gets mouthy). which is different from tim who you can see on occasion has bouts of anger. he's also remarkably forgiving because he's developed more empathy for people- something that tim also had.

sasuke also has a policy of never referring to wanted people by their 'monikers' slash villain names. on one hand, because one of his therapists had told them that it just reinforces then delusions of grandeur many villains have but also i imagine it's mostly a cultural reason. as a ninja only specific people got monikers and it was never for a good reason (usually it meant they had killed a lot of people or because of some bad notable trait about them ). ex. the white fang, sharingan kakashi, friend killer kakashi, the legendary sucker, the yellow flash. using someone's moniker means you know them solely by reputation and are lending them a degree of respect by acknowledging that the other person is well known. sasuke does not want to offer that kind of respect, inadvertent or not. i imagine it really annoys some of the rogues. especially joker and deathstroke (i had a funny scene where sasuke was going to refer to harley and poison ivy as dr. quinzel and dr. isley and then joker as just 'jack' but i never managed to find a way to work it in).

for deathstroke it just irritates him because he feels like he's fighting one of joey's little league friends because sasuke keeps referring to him as mr. wilson. for other rogues they all kind of pause the first time it happens a few of them even freak out because they realize that sasuke knows their secret identity. sasuke's family all just accept that it's a weird little quirk of his

ultimatly i think that sasuke has a pretty good relationship with his family, not really any better or worse than canon tim's but it's one that sasuke never really managed to have before which is the biggest change for him.

but that doesn't mean he shares every part of himself with his family. sasuke at first thought that maybe one of the many magical, psychic, or telepathic people would be able to sense he doesn't belong, that he's not "from" their universe. it was a quiet sort of fear he had because he'd grown to love this life. but he gets reassured that he belongs because no one detects anything off about him. once while he was alone with martian manhunter he'd asked him to read his mind and tell him what he was thinking of. sasuke tried showing him his old life, his old home, his family but martian manhunter had just told him that he wasn't thinking of anything. it's like the tradeoff of being in this new life was that his old one was no longer congruent with reality.

i definitely feel like sasuke struggles with that for awhile. that he's the only one that can continue to remember or mourn that world. so he tries his best to bring in and incorporate parts of that past to his new life. using recipes kakashi taught him to soothe his summons, using moves rock lee taught him, tracking techniques he'd seen kiba use, herbal medicines that sakura had developed, etc.

but despite all the healing that sasuke experienced i feel like there's a few things that cause him real distress. one of those is orochimaru. i don't fully agree with how naruto ended with regard to orochimaru, out of all characters i don't believe he deserved a redemption arc. sasuke's time with him in this verse was a lot darker than it was in naruto. his line of "i've learnt my lesson about following strange men who offer me things in exchange for my body" was definitely a thinly veiled admission of what he'd endured under orochimaru. that is that sasuke endured an unspoken sexual abuse or coercion under orochimaru. maybe orochimaru rewarded sasuke the same way he did many other officers by letting him (read: making him) engage in sexual relations because orochimaru views people the same way he does lab rats (the viewing people as lab rats is also why sasuke despises scarecrow because he reminds him too much of orochimaru's experimental nature) and that meant that his rewards for performing well were limited to food and copulation opportunities. there's this really great sasuke time travel fic that i highly recommmend that goes more into the sexual abuse trauma sasuke endured under orochimaru because it's a take that i've only ever seen one other time and it was that fic.

jason definitely does worry and deliberate over telling someone but sasuke had told him he was getting better. ultimately he decides to tell bruce about it and sasuke i think would hit a bit of a rough patch because this wasn't something he'd ever brought up in therapy or truly processed- hence his big reaction over the fear gas when "orochimaru" appeared. it's this that catalyzes sasuke confessing what occurred over the year he went looking for bruce and also about what had happened to him with orochimaru though sasuke refuses to acknowledge his name because sasuke doesn't want orochimaru to have the dignity of also existing in this new world.

ultimately i think sasuke settles in more. he has the realization about his sexuality he never had in his old life and basically just lives a fulfilling with his family that he finally let in. beyond this i'm afraid i don't really have much more inspiration but thank you so much for your interest!! i'm happy you enjoyed my weird little fic about sasuke being reborn as tim!!!

#anonymous #asks #answered asks

[mermaidsirennikita]

You have any recommendations where the hero hates everyone except her? 💕 Historical’s included if any.

Hmm...

Managed by Kristen Callihan. An all-time favorite contemporary romance. Hero is the uptight, strict manager of a rock band. He does love the guys as they're his longtime friends, but he's very snappy and standoffishness by nature. He hires the heroine as the band's photographer/social media manager, but he has insomnia and can only sleep when she's in the bed with him. So they become platonic nap partners. Naturally. Has a particularly incredible scene when he jacks off while smelling her dirty underwear and dodging her question from the other side of the door, before handwashing said underwear and hiding them underneath his mattress.

Hotel of Secrets by Diana Biller. Historical. The hero is less about hating people and more about being an extreme loner who doesn't want to get close to people. He's an American spy on a case, the heroine is this social butterfly who's trying to save this Viennese hotel her family has owned for generations. He saves her life, like, thrice. Also, he's a big ol' virgin and she is... not. SO good.

The Truth About Cads and Dukes by Elisa Braden. Historical. Again, he's more standoffish and he does love his siblings, just is exceptionally bad at expressing his feelings. The hero marries the heroine after his brother ruins her (in a non-sexual manner) and it's really largely your standard marriage of convenience book, but done very well with an excellent love confession. Heroine is plus size, which is nice. Maybe my favorite Rescued from Ruin book? I really like all the times his lust cannot be contained and he just tackles her.

How to Marry a Marquess by Stacy Reid. Historical. BIG this vibe. The hero is kind of ostracized by society because he claimed his illegitimate daughter and is raising her without shame. He's very FUCK ALL Y'ALL about it, but the heroine, who is this very proper miss type, is his longtime friend and he adores her. She's been in love with him for forever, but he doesn't think she can deal with being an outcast so he won't make a move. Which is why she asks him for lessons in seducing some TOTALLY RANDOM GUY she's FOR SURE IN LOVE WITH. Very hot, and leads to some fabulous angst towards the end.

What I Did for a Duke by Julie Anne Long. Historical. Super this. Hero is a jaded snappish duke pushing 40 who finds a local rake in bed with his fiance. He decides to exact revenge by seducing said rake's innocent, virginal sister (who's like, half his age). She's super smart, so she catches on immediately, but she wants her friend who she's into to make a move, so she kind of allows him to court her... But then he becomes genuinely fond of her and it gets real.

After Dark with the Duke by Julie Anne Long. Begins as light ETL, becomes more like this. 40-something war hero duke is staying at the same boarding house as 20-something scandalous opera singer while he's writing his memoirs. She bugs him, he offends her, in penance he offers to teach her Italian to help with her singing, and they develop a very sweet friendship that quickly shifts into major sexual tension.

Marrying Winterborne by Lisa Kleypas. Historical. Rhys Winterborne definitely has like, FRIENDS, but he's also kind of super grumpy and sort of socially awkward, lol. He adores Helen and would move heaven and earth for her, even if he's bad at giving flowers. Benefits from reading Cold-Hearted Rake first, as they begin as a secondary romance in that one. People will tell you Chasing Cassandra is this even more, and I guess it is, but... Idk, maybe I should reread that one because it didn't super do it for me, and I think Tom Severin would've been better off with a different heroine.

Dreaming of You by Lisa Kleypas. Historical. I think this absolutely counts, lol. Like, does Derek have one friend who isn't under his employ? Yes. But they're not as tight by the time the book begins because reasons, and he meets Sara Fielding when she shoots some guy to save him, and while he tries to be grumpy to her, he's quickly like "I've known Sara Fielding for five minutes and if anything happens to her I'll kill everyone in this room including myself".

My Darling Duke by Stacy Reid. Historical. Heroine pretends she's being courted by a recluse duke in order to help her sisters find husbands, but then recluse duke shows up in society for the first time in years to be like "and exactly what is happening rn". He's a recluse because he was super injured years back and is now a wheelchair user; he's very bitter about his disability. He makes the heroine continue the charade for a minute for his own reasons, but falls for her. I really liked how this book explored sexual dysfunction and like, having sex in a way that isn't the standard romance novel HE TOOK HER CONQUERINGLY manner.

Sworn to the Shadow God by Ruby Dixon. Fantasy. Gamer girl gets teleported to this fantasy world and becomes the sorta servant to the literal God of Death. Everyone hates him so he hates everyone. It's honestly very funny and sweet. He has this thing going on with him wherein he can't like... tell the truth... so everything he says is the opposite of what he means. This girl gives him head fairly on in the book and he's like "YOU'RE TERRIBLE AT THAT" (translation: you're great at that) during, and I think she bites his dick? He has a lot to work through after that. She thinks he hates her, but he actually adores her.

The Taming of a Highlander by Elisa Braden. Historical. Another, "he technically loves his family" guy. The hero was considered the golden boy of the family, but he was tortured and lost an eye after being wrongfully imprisoned for months, so he's not doing great. The heroine catches him attacking one of the people responsible for what happened to him, so she offers to marry him to keep from having to testify against him.

Shadowheart by Laura Kinsale. Historical. Hero is a total villain and persona non grata throughout Italy; heroine does initially dislike him, but quickly falls in love and she's like his treasured possession. Soft noncon in the beginning. The sex scenes are otherwise are super great, very femdom.

#romance novel blogging #book recs

[wordsofahoneybee]

ORGANIC HAUNTINGS FREE TO A GOOD HOME

PART I: GHOSTS AND GOD

Ghosts as a concept fascinate me. Humans are obsessed with the idea that, even after you die, there is something of you left behind. I don’t believe in ghosts, personally. It makes more sense to me that humans are so good at recognizing other people, that somewhere along the way we started finding them even when they aren’t really there. If we were being scientific, we’d call that a false positive. Like seeing faces in rocks and Jesus in burnt toast, we see the people we miss in creaking floorboards and flickering lights. I have friends that do believe in ghosts and have stories of seeing them, though, and I’m not about to call them liars. I have respect for what I don’t understand and cannot prove, and does it matter if they're real when they affect us just the same? I possess a sort of cognitive dissonance on the subject of ghosts in that respect. Ghosts aren’t real, but I believe my best friend when she tells me she and her father both saw the same shadowy old man hovering over their beds at night. 

Similar to ghosts, I also don’t believe in God. Except in a sort of abstract way that only someone raised by an ex-Catholic mother can. Meaning that God, if He does exist, is a right bastard and I tell Him this regularly. But mostly I don’t believe in God. Instead, I have my own off-brand flavor of spirituality; a delightful mix of optimistic nihilism and bastardized shintoism. This is a very pretentious way of saying nothing matters, so why the fuck wouldn’t we choose kindness? I think that life leaves something behind and that the something left behind deserves acknowledgement, even though I definitely do not believe in ghosts.

I wish ghosts were real (and that I believed in them). I think generally life would be much cooler if sometimes people decided to stick around after beefing it, but at 15% opacity. I also think my grief would be easier to hold if I believed my loved ones persisted After. Or maybe not. I’ve woken in the night more than once in a fit, hoping only that they aren’t cold. I’m not sure that logic or reasoning are effective weapons against mourning, but I would certainly give it a good effort. I would also obviously use the existence of ghosts to become a necromancer which would be --quite frankly-- fucking rad, and possibly have the added benefit of solving the cold problem. If God were real, I would put together a PowerPoint presentation and petition for Him to make ghosts real as well. Pros: Carrie Fisher and Betty White could potentially still be hanging out. Cons: my evil dead hamster could come back to kill me.

PART II: HAUNTINGS AND HORROR

I do believe in hauntings. I think of them as separate from ghosts, which I know is unusual. What’s also unusual is that I don’t believe hauntings require death. There are two kinds of hauntings in my mind: ones that are funny, and ones that are memories. The funny ones are mostly a joke; another way of acknowledging a liminal space in a cheeky wink-nudge way. Denny’s parking lots at 3am and abandoned farm houses are haunted, mostly because I think that would be hilarious, but also because they’re the kind of places you expect to be haunted. I think placebo hauntings still count, after all, ghosts aren’t real. The second kind of haunting is more genuine than this. I’ve found that there are some places that have been full of people or life for so long that they start to feel alive themselves. Childhood homes, old churches, historic sites; so much life has passed through that I find it hard to believe that it doesn’t have some kind of memory. It should not come as a surprise to learn that I am incredibly sentimental. I'm the kind of person that says hello to the ocean and greets the birds on my deck each morning. I often keep items I do not need or even want because throwing them away feels unkind. Like something alive within them will take offense at my abandoning them. It’s a childish belief, and in my mind, not so different from believing that the dead can haunt us. Which might make me a hypocrite, but I never claimed to be otherwise.

If ghosts were real, I think there are a couple of changes we would need to make as a culture on how we view them. Horror movies and ghost busting ‘reality’ shows give spirits a horrible rap. Don’t even get me started on Ouija boards. To this day I do not understand how a piece of cardboard branded by Hasbro could inspire so much fear in my friends. That being said, I know my horror movie plots and I’m not about to go tempting fate. 

I love the vibe of edgy horror and gothic chic as much as the next My Chemical Romance fan; I just don’t think graveyards and ghosts deserve to be labeled as something scary. Rot is disturbing, yes, and zombies set off a primal fear of disease and rabies that makes evolutionary sense, but graveyards are just a resting place for people we loved and ghosts are just people who didn’t get the memo that the party’s over and they need to go home. Popular ghost lore insists that spirits remain due to some unfinished business or strong emotion, but I refuse to believe that if our emotions are strong enough to hold us back from true death, only anger achieves it. I know of people who believe their passed family members stay and watch over them; a haunting made of love. That’s not scary, that’s your Great Grandma Gladys sticking around to slam the cupboards a bit.

We didn’t always think of ghosts and graveyards as scary, and plenty of cultures still don’t. In the early 20th century, Americans treated graveyards like public parks. People would spend afternoons on the grass among the dead in a cheerful affair, picnicking and generally having a good time. I for one believe we should bring this back, and not just because I view Mary Shelley as my personal hero. It’s been pointed out to me that cemeteries, for the most part, are public spaces, if people so chose they could go picnic there. My point is, when was the last time you saw families gathered on the ceiling of the dead for anything other than tragedy or a holiday? Ability is not in question, rather cultural willingness. 

I don't believe in an afterlife, but I do worry still that death might be lonely. Thinking about this for too long makes me feel silly, considering how greatly the dead outnumber the living, but as I said before, logic doesn’t work on grief. I do know, though, that the idea of sitting in a plot six feet under, preoccupied only with being forgotten scares me. 

PART III: LOVE AND THE UNIVERSE

Light travels at 186,282 miles per second through the vacuum of space. It takes over four years for the light from Proxima Centauri, our closest neighbor, to reach us here on Earth. If for some reason, Proxima Centauri ever went out, it would take over four years for us to notice. For those four years, we would look up at the night sky and see a star that doesn't exist anymore. So, perhaps under certain circumstances, I do believe in ghosts.

"We are made of star stuff" to quote the late Carl Sagan. Billions upon billions of years ago, the first stars died in rapturous, scintillating fashion and their supernova corpses created the foundations of life. I am a firm believer in the romanticization of decay. If only for my own sake and peace of mind, I must believe there is something beautiful about the hunger of rot. Like passing down the name of a loved one, our bodies pass down their flesh to the earth.

When you bury a body, it creates a nutrient bloom; an overabundance of minerals causing a concentrated explosion of plant life. Death becomes another kind of life. This, I think, is why I’ve latched so tightly onto the idea of haunting as a kind of love. I want to think of ghosts as what happens to the leftover love we never got to give away, the parts that are scared of being alone; light from a long-dead star. I am a poet, though, and I think most things are about love in some roundabout way. 

So, really, what I mean when I say something is haunted is that there is love left behind. I mean that tombs are a kind of memory. They are I love you, I hope you rest well. They are I hope whatever comes After is kind. 

They are grass that grows that slightest bit greener, life persisting in the only way it knows how.

#prose essay #prose #poetry #ORGANIC HAUNTINGS

[branzinos]

like the writing on Neighbours was never Good, it's a soap, but why is the writing on the new Neighbours so Bad???? none of it feels compelling it's just like things keep happening and none of them have any weight at all. I know there's a timeskip (...why? just to explain Nell? the finale already had explanations for most of the cast moving away?? everyone moving away was the whole CRUX of the finale? why did they have to make a huge hole in the timeline?) and all so they don't have the benefit of being able to lean on plot threads that were already there so heavily, but they should have started with the existing cast and then built it up instead of flinging everything at us at once.

It's not comfortable to watch at all and isn't that the point of a soap? The familiarity? Like I needed a few episodes to process that that's suppose to be Nell, for one. They keep flinging plot threads at the wall but none of it feels like it has any weight. It almost feels like it's all written by AI. even Karl and Susan's relationship doesn't feel like it makes any sense - the dialogue in the scene where he finds the box felt SO off, like it's a cold read - I still don't really understand WHY she's impulse buying, because she doesn't seem to actually get any pleasure out of the shopping or receiving packages which is... the whole point of shopping addiction as a coping method, surely? None of the new "mysteries" are intriguing because I have no investment in these charas or anyone surrounding them. The Therese and Toadie stuff is incredibly out of pocket in particular and we're supposed to mindlessly just accept it, despite them being in two of the most overhyped couples in the old show? And they introduce a new mixed race lesbian couple and somehow make me not care about them whatsoever??? Which is an incredible feat because I'm me and I'll always go where the gays are - but they feel like they're there to tick a box but have no personality?? You could replace them with a cardboard cut out. They've only tried to make us care about one of the boys and I simplyyy do not. I don't even remember any of their names! The only chara that has felt real so far is Haz and his dog and his kindness to everyone and that's mostly down to the actor feeling very warm I think, rather than the writing. And the less said about stunt casting mischa b*rton the better, because she looks so out of place even though she's trying the best with what paper thin material she has. LOOKS incredible though, especially towering a full foot over the rest of the cast, lol.

Everything feels so empty, like they're just farming cliffhangers. Are they doing this so they can bin it and keep the license for the old episodes but SEEM like they tried?? Still look like the big hero company who saved the "beloved show", like a million other shows that get "saved" then quickly canned? I know it's only been one week of episodes but I fully don't feel like this is even the same show. Incredible skill to make me feel like I don't know characters that I've followed for like 20 years.

#i know literally none of yall care about this but its just. its bad. its not gonna last long in its current state. #neighbourstv

[bfxenon]

Convince Your Boss to Send You to MozCon 2023 [Plus Bonus Letter Template!]

MozCon is returning in-person to Seattle August 7-8, 2023 and this year, we’re excited to bring the Future of Search to our stage. 

From networking with peers, hearing from industry leaders, and making new connections that can help grow your business or career, conferences offer so many benefits to attendees. You know that. Your peers know that. But how do you persuade the powers-that-be (aka your boss) that sending you is beneficial for your business? 

Don’t worry, we’ve got a plan. (And if you want to skip ahead to the letter template, here it is!)

Get the Template

How to make the case

Business competition is fiercer than ever. Only those who are able to shift tactics with the changing tides of marketing will be able to come out on top. And that’s exactly what MozCon is going to help you do. 

Covering everything a growing marketer needs (SEO, content, strategy, growth), MozCon delivers top-notch talks from hand-selected speakers over two days in August. 

There's so much in store for you this year. Here’s just a sampling of what you can expect at this year’s MozCon:

Speakers and content

Our speakers are real practitioners and industry leaders. We work with them to ensure they deliver the best content and insights to the stage to set you up for a year of success. No sales pitches or talking heads here!

Networking

You work hard taking notes, learning new insights, and digesting all of that knowledge — that’s why we think you deserve a little fun. It's your chance to decompress with fellow attendees and make new friends in the industry. We host exciting evening networking events that add to the value you'll get from your day of education. Plus, our Birds of a Feather lunch tables allow you to connect with like-minded peers who share similar interests.

High-quality videos to share with your team

About a month or so after the conference, we release professionally edited videos of every presentation at the conference. Many of our ticket types include free access! Your colleagues won’t get to partake in the real-time experience(the #FOMO is real), but they will get a chance to learn everything you did. 

Great food on site 

We know that conference food isn’t typically worth mentioning, but MozCon is notorious for its cornucopia of tasty offerings.  

You can expect two meals a day and loads of snacks from local Seattle vendors — in the past we’ve featured a smorgasbord from the likes of Trophy cupcakes, KuKuRuZa popcorn, Starbucks’ Seattle Reserve cold brew.

Discounts for current customers 

Moz Pro, Moz Local, API, and STAT customers save big on their ticket cost, and there are discounts for groups of 10+ as well, so make sure to take advantage of savings where you can!

But of course, don’t take our word for it! There are some incredible resources available at your fingertips that tout the benefits of attending conferences:

2022 was my first MozCon! It was a great experience where I got to listen to thought leaders and peers on their individual approaches. The event spoiled us with awesome swag and great speakers while creating a safe space to facilitate deep discussions.

-Ray Martinez, Director of SEO - Archer Education

As a small business owner, attending MozCon was a big leap of faith for me (and a big investment!) I was so delighted to find there was a place for me at MozCon. The speakers were excellent- true experts who shared what doesn't work as compellingly as what DOES. My fellow attendees were accessible, kind, and generous with their knowledge. Most importantly, I left with a list of clear tangible strategies for growing my business this year. I learned so much- and I'm so glad I went.

-Marguerite  Tacoma Real Estate Agent  MoveToTacoma.com

There are lots of conferences that marketing and SEO professionals can attend. MozCon provides extreme value through its high-quality speakers, entertaining events, delicious meals and snacks, and networking opportunities. If you had to choose just one conference to attend, you won't go wrong choosing MozCon.

 - Jarrod Galm, SEO Manager, Wealth Enhancement Group

I came to MozCon expecting a handful of great takeaways and maybe some new SEO techniques. Instead, I was blown away multiple times over, made great connections, and I'm sharing a deck of takeaways with my team.

- Carly Johansen, Content Marketing Manager, Oregon State University Ecampus

MozCon 2022 was fantastic! Every session I attended was jam-packed full of actionable insights from speakers who really know their stuff. I left feeling invigorated, inspired and excited to put the things I'd learned into action

-Eloise West,  Senior Digital Marketing Strategist, Designzillas

This is my second in-person event (I went in 2019) and fourth overall. This is still a great conference even having more experience, and I noticed I pick up different things each time as my experience grows and I hear things in different ways. The networking opportunities are also invaluable, especially as I'm an in-house SEO with no team. I've learned a ton and have really grown as an SEO and heavily attribute a lot of that to MozCon. 

-Lauren Huffman, SEO Manager, Lulu and Georgia

Need a little more to get your boss on board? Check out some videos from years past to get a taste for the caliber of our speakers. 

Buy ticket, save money, get competitive marketing insights. Everyone wins!

MozCon is one unforgettable experience that lives and grows with you beyond just the days you spend attending the conference. And there's no time like the present to pitch MozCon to your boss. If they're still stuck on the "why", let them know about our subscriber or group pricing tiers — you’ll save hundreds of dollars when you do. Just think of all the Keurigs you could get for that communal kitchen! 

Be sure to grab the letter template and make your case the easy way!

Get the Template

[lakelandseo]

Convince Your Boss to Send You to MozCon 2023 [Plus Bonus Letter Template!]

MozCon is returning in-person to Seattle August 7-8, 2023 and this year, we’re excited to bring the Future of Search to our stage. 

From networking with peers, hearing from industry leaders, and making new connections that can help grow your business or career, conferences offer so many benefits to attendees. You know that. Your peers know that. But how do you persuade the powers-that-be (aka your boss) that sending you is beneficial for your business? 

Don’t worry, we’ve got a plan. (And if you want to skip ahead to the letter template, here it is!)

Get the Template

How to make the case

Business competition is fiercer than ever. Only those who are able to shift tactics with the changing tides of marketing will be able to come out on top. And that’s exactly what MozCon is going to help you do. 

Covering everything a growing marketer needs (SEO, content, strategy, growth), MozCon delivers top-notch talks from hand-selected speakers over two days in August. 

There's so much in store for you this year. Here’s just a sampling of what you can expect at this year’s MozCon:

Speakers and content

Our speakers are real practitioners and industry leaders. We work with them to ensure they deliver the best content and insights to the stage to set you up for a year of success. No sales pitches or talking heads here!

Networking

You work hard taking notes, learning new insights, and digesting all of that knowledge — that’s why we think you deserve a little fun. It's your chance to decompress with fellow attendees and make new friends in the industry. We host exciting evening networking events that add to the value you'll get from your day of education. Plus, our Birds of a Feather lunch tables allow you to connect with like-minded peers who share similar interests.

High-quality videos to share with your team

About a month or so after the conference, we release professionally edited videos of every presentation at the conference. Many of our ticket types include free access! Your colleagues won’t get to partake in the real-time experience(the #FOMO is real), but they will get a chance to learn everything you did. 

Great food on site 

We know that conference food isn’t typically worth mentioning, but MozCon is notorious for its cornucopia of tasty offerings.  

You can expect two meals a day and loads of snacks from local Seattle vendors — in the past we’ve featured a smorgasbord from the likes of Trophy cupcakes, KuKuRuZa popcorn, Starbucks’ Seattle Reserve cold brew.

Discounts for current customers 

Moz Pro, Moz Local, API, and STAT customers save big on their ticket cost, and there are discounts for groups of 10+ as well, so make sure to take advantage of savings where you can!

But of course, don’t take our word for it! There are some incredible resources available at your fingertips that tout the benefits of attending conferences:

2022 was my first MozCon! It was a great experience where I got to listen to thought leaders and peers on their individual approaches. The event spoiled us with awesome swag and great speakers while creating a safe space to facilitate deep discussions.

-Ray Martinez, Director of SEO - Archer Education

As a small business owner, attending MozCon was a big leap of faith for me (and a big investment!) I was so delighted to find there was a place for me at MozCon. The speakers were excellent- true experts who shared what doesn't work as compellingly as what DOES. My fellow attendees were accessible, kind, and generous with their knowledge. Most importantly, I left with a list of clear tangible strategies for growing my business this year. I learned so much- and I'm so glad I went.

-Marguerite  Tacoma Real Estate Agent  MoveToTacoma.com

There are lots of conferences that marketing and SEO professionals can attend. MozCon provides extreme value through its high-quality speakers, entertaining events, delicious meals and snacks, and networking opportunities. If you had to choose just one conference to attend, you won't go wrong choosing MozCon.

 - Jarrod Galm, SEO Manager, Wealth Enhancement Group

I came to MozCon expecting a handful of great takeaways and maybe some new SEO techniques. Instead, I was blown away multiple times over, made great connections, and I'm sharing a deck of takeaways with my team.

- Carly Johansen, Content Marketing Manager, Oregon State University Ecampus

MozCon 2022 was fantastic! Every session I attended was jam-packed full of actionable insights from speakers who really know their stuff. I left feeling invigorated, inspired and excited to put the things I'd learned into action

-Eloise West,  Senior Digital Marketing Strategist, Designzillas

This is my second in-person event (I went in 2019) and fourth overall. This is still a great conference even having more experience, and I noticed I pick up different things each time as my experience grows and I hear things in different ways. The networking opportunities are also invaluable, especially as I'm an in-house SEO with no team. I've learned a ton and have really grown as an SEO and heavily attribute a lot of that to MozCon. 

-Lauren Huffman, SEO Manager, Lulu and Georgia

Need a little more to get your boss on board? Check out some videos from years past to get a taste for the caliber of our speakers. 

Buy ticket, save money, get competitive marketing insights. Everyone wins!

MozCon is one unforgettable experience that lives and grows with you beyond just the days you spend attending the conference. And there's no time like the present to pitch MozCon to your boss. If they're still stuck on the "why", let them know about our subscriber or group pricing tiers — you’ll save hundreds of dollars when you do. Just think of all the Keurigs you could get for that communal kitchen! 

Be sure to grab the letter template and make your case the easy way!

Get the Template