#i got a fine today LOL

[killjpeg-reblogs]

I'm kinda freaking out that im a failing adult just from social standpoint. Im so fucking unpleasant to have around

#txt #the uncomfortably silent person. #which shouldnt be bad #but i dont rly want to talk to people more than needed #i guess ive gained a lot of social skills ever since ive moved out and went to therapy #but ig it didnt rly fix the actual problem i have and it's connecting with people #despite everything if you want that you do have to initiate it #but i dont want to. i dont have energy to. i dont care to #after getting this job ive just been uncomfortable more around people for no other reason than that im not like them #idk. it takes me time to process things people say to me sometimes out of the blue. or ask something. #i fail to be able to word my own thoughts and social anxiety keeps kicking me in the guts #i got a fine today LOL #i like my job i just wish i didnt have to interact with anyone and also i knew for certain who to go to for help #this shit isnt even completely my fault. still fucking sucks #i hate the fucking uncertainty and mess the organization is #im tired #sometimes i feel like i just need to completely isolatr myself #i dont want to go to college. i dont want to work. i dont want any of this

[unproduciblesmackdown]

always enjoyed the Chess Set In The Foreground perspective framing used here

now also noting like, huh, a chess set in a general store just visited by marigold competitors who killed one of their guys and are now on the way back from their rendezvous point w/suppliers

#and now to take a big sip of ''nothing suggests lackadaisy ft. people stuck / things repeating / death begetting death'' #not like i suppose we're going to be hit with ''& then mordecai and viktor sat down at the defiance field office for every passing gangster #played chess and then went and properly slaughtered the lackadaisy crew and arbogasts at the funeral home / barn w/car-sized holes'' #good reminder though that Viktor Is Now Active....left off with elsa managing to give him a phonecall; for good measure #lackadaisy #i have no lengthy Mitzi Mordecai Murder Mystery Musings posts for today (b/c not enough fresh musing insights) but no prommies #epiphanies are on their own schedule #quite the chess piece arrangement seen there too lol. can't tell if there's any Classic Configuration in the game b/w viktor & mordecai #not a chesshead and never was lol strategy games??? who's that #or i'll play them but not strategically. invented Flick Chess for indoor recess in elementary school #you flick a piece across the board and whatever you knock off the board = you took those pieces lmfao #though not like that has Zero strategy. thinking of my day enjoying tiddlywinks research #imagine my delight revisiting all this material like oh yeah the little pic of freckle tiddlywinking #let's squop; boys #i'm also supposing that chess sets? checkers sets? and etc. would be common general store features; like phone usage....real general.... #but like; what; are we expecting this Not to bring a response from marigold lol #got the nervous twitch but they're like ''ah it's fine. cost of doing business''

[knifebaby3000]

midautumn

#artists on tumblr #art #oc #my art #tz #tian #zhu #was so convinced i was getting this done for yday the 29th and then i BARELY got it done today #not sure how i feel abt colors but rly like it otherwise!!! cheers they are gay married and in love and i love them etc etc #''not sure how i feel abt colors'' it's bc it looks diff on every single screen i own [ clown noises ] #SAID I WASN'T GOING TO EDIT LOL IF U SAW THE ORIG... THAT ONE'S FINE BUT THIS ONE'S BETTER????? #changed my mind abt the floating torsos + tian's fade was a little too low + i short-changed zhu's hair #this is the comp i wanted to do anyway. i'm so funny

[buwheal]

Hey, Spamton!

Just wondering about something.... what's your relationship with the Addisons?

#He's specifically talking to these few anons btw lol #you guys are fine #[you've got mail!] #spamton #spamton g spamton #deltarune #deltarune chapter 2 #gif #ask22 #3/3 #last one today lol goodnight #thats SEVEN asks done today!!! and most are animated!!! eeyipes!!! #i was having fun though!! gotta love it when i get a good drawing streak on

[lunarharp]

Very important conferences.

#witch hat tag #orufrey #some real serious discussions goin on in this atelier today. dont u doubt it. #agott is the only one who has ever thought about this because she is a 12 year old lesbian and UMM..FRIEND? LIKE FRIEND? IS THAT..LEGAL??? #this is all i drew today because silly things like this take hours lol. at least it's practice for poses -_- #i got the pattern of the girls' dresses wrong but i couldn't be bothered to change halfway through. #don't worry if you're like what is the naakiwan downs. is that name even mentioned in the main manga #ANYWAY i KEEP thinking about what if it's actually banned for professors and watchful eyes to date like that would make a lot of sense. #like maybe it should be banned. SO??? are they just low-key Aware of what the deal is and they're just Putting their feelings aside #until graduation??? take my tassel as an unspoken reminder of how i feel?? living together trial period?? this feels like it's truly it #When we're free to be together........ Sensei loves homophobia parallels without there actually being homophobia #Let's invent reasons why men cant be together. Ummm well whatever. i'm screaming in my head but it's fine. #this will probably form the theme of my orufrey for a while. i've thought of this before but for some reason today it's big for me. #i guess the tassels might not specifically be a part of that since they exchanged them before tower of books #and qifrey made his mysterious decision to be a teacher after that and..well whatever. I need more of backstory and just..everything? #But i also don't mind when vinanna interrupts my wishes with just a chapter of just being really dreamy? I love witch hat?

[icewindandboringhorror]

Some (late) holiday photos of the boye~!

#cats #holiday #OUGHH....... barely could even get these edited and posted... my mysterious sickness flare up has been sooo bad the past few #days.. I didn't even go to the usual obligatory family christmas I was supposed to attend (!!! health issue/medical mention in tags below) #My stomach issues basically put me in a constant state of uncontrollable shivering/body shaking + nausea + sometimes rapid heart #rate. and when it happens at night that makes it like.. nearly impossible to sleep when you're violently shaking + you can feel your heart #so strong + you keep having to run to the bathroom every 5 minute to cough and gag #and throw up and so on and so forth. etc. So I went like 40 hours without any sleep almost for christmas eve and all of christmas day #last night I finally got maybe 2 hours of sleep in between the nausea and shaking and stuff. and then today I was able to get a few #hours of sleep in the afternoon. Today I tried taking an anxiety mediciation a doctor gave me in case it was anxiety related (it's apparent #ly used to relax people and works in the moment. rather than like Anxiety Mediciation that you have to take for weeks to see any effect #because I think this isn't actually acting on your brain chemistry it's judt like..a mild sedative or something.) but all that did was make #me dizzy and sweaty lol. I;m glad I slept a little but I'm just still frustrated that I don't feel normal. I started having these #'episodes' (with the stomach issues + shaking + heartrate + nausea etc.) like at the end of october. And usually it will happen for like a #few hours at a time. or i'll lose sleep one day and then be fine the next. but this has been like nearly 3 days of feeling weird. so is #getting kind of annoying... It's funny too because I was so so productive like.. literally the few days before. I was feeling much better #and I was working on my game and blah blah. But then.. random issue flare up out of nowhere of course.. yaayy.... happy holidays to meee lo #I did at least see two random ducks outside of my window in the yard area for christmas. and havent seen them since. So it's like.. hrmm.. #pacing around my room nauseous and shakings and etc. but at least... hello.. two little ducks placed there just for me :3c #Now I get anxiety every night which I'm sure doesn't help/could exacerbate whatever underlying genuinely physical issues exist. But after #like 2 nights of 'I spend the night sleepless and incredibly uncomfortable just sitting in the dark sick' then bedtime is like.. dread... #I even was trying slapping myself in the face in desperation to see if somehow that could shock my body out of whatever the hell it was #doing lol.. up at 3am holding ice cubes in my hand and hitting myself in the head and crying from exhaustion and thowing up.. literally #ridiculous cartoon character feeling... AAANYWAY!!! At least I have baby boy pictures. and I have lots of doctors appointments so hopefully #whatever the issue is can be sorted out at some point. I don't know much about ibs but hopefully maybe something like that that I could pos #ibly take medication for and not something more seirous or anything. Maybe there's a food I'm secretly intolerant to or whatever. #And I did at least post a sims holday video actually timed for the holidays so that's something. I havent been productive really latrely #though obviously.. I can't even play games or small tasks when in that state since I'm just SO physically uncomfortable. Nausea and heart #stuff are THE hardest physical sensations to ignore.. BUT yeah... hoping I shall sleep at all tonight. hopeing to get like 3 productive #things done.. at some point... at least SOMETHING... lol..... *** *** ***

[why-the-heck-not]

19.12.23, tuesday

0.5h of coding lol

wasn’t having the best day so decided to finally watch the barbie-movie (it’s on hbo rn) bc figured that could cheer me up

but bc the universe loves a good timing, on the grocery store trip after, some dudes came to me like ”which one of us would u fuck?” and that annoyed me way more than it should’ve. Like cmon, it’s 10pm at a grocery store; if you’re not cottage cheese or olive oil get tf out of my face

just a short evening walk bc it was windy and I was annoyed

#also the barbie-movie; it was fine #not my favorite but I didn’t think it’d be bc I don’t rly usually go for that genre #also at this point the hype had got to me so my expectations were very unfair #the set tho; it looked so good #I love how I planned that I’d be a machine now this week so could actually not stress during christmas but it’s looking out to be like one #of the most unproductive days I’ve had all autumn lol #i’m thinking if I should just call it and start the holidays now and just idk catch up on some of the days in between christmas & new years #and I do have 8 days after new years before other courses start #but idk if I do thay I might not rly be able to chill during christmas #like rn I’m thinking if I should bring my laptop with me just in case I could squeeze a couple hours here & there during the few days #which is not the thing to do obviously; like it’s 5 days I can be apart from my laptop for 5 days #but it feels like with the amount of stuff I’ve gotten done I rly couldn’t afford a 5 day break rn #idk I’ll figure it out I won’t bring a laptop just to haunt me #(I’m bad at fully relaxing; there’s always the ’’u could be doing something productive tho’’-voice) #(which I don’t listen but then I just get nothing done and also never rly relax which is good super good) #(can u tell im still annoyed at everything rn lol sorry for the tag rant) #december 2023 #2023 #today

[expelliarmus]

#mine #doctor who #dwedit #matt smith #jenna louise coleman #flashing gif #the colouring is again slightly different in each gif lol #the doctor: this is fine #clara: NO IT'S NOT #so today i tried to buy sdcc tickets and i managed to get in right when all the badges sold out u____u #i will try again in november with the open registration but.... BIG SIGH #and then i went to vote in the civic election #and then i got some jabs in my arms #and i had some starbucks with my friend and then later i got some bubble tea with my family #it was a very busy day!!!!!

[coquelicoq]

i am such a clown. decided to make stickers for my siblings even though i have ZERO design skills or knowledge of any programs that allow you to rotate text except for powerpoint. so i made them in powerpoint. (this took, mmmm, maybe 6-8 hours btw.) then had to find a website that would print and mail these stickers to me. no i don't want 50 stickers. i want one circle sticker and one rectangle sticker. oh that's not an option anybody wants to give me? okay then i guess i will buy 16 circle stickers (the least offered) and 50 rectangle stickers (the least offered. why not 16 also? a mystery). one of the designs is for my sibling's band, so if they like it theoretically they could use the stickers as merch or something lol. but i'm not holding my breath, on account of the aforementioned lack of design skills. i get away with a lot among my family because they're all so willing to react to my questionable creations with aww look, she Tried! but that probably doesn't work for strangers who are fans of my sibling's band. so i guess they will just have 49 extra stickers that they can idk stick to streetlight poles or something. not my problem.

#i originally designed them on graph paper. with like a compass and everything #i learned something new today!! apparently you can curve a text box around a circle!!!!!! that saved me some time #this all came about because my sister was telling me how sad she was that she lost her water bottle because it had a sticker on it #that she had gotten from her travels. and i was like awesome i'll just make her a new one #girl what! you don't know how to do that!!! CLOWNNNNNN #also i don't actually know what the original sticker looked like lol which is probably for the best so i can't 1) plagiarize #or 2) compare my shoddy workmanship to that of an actual professional #i thought about commissioning an actual graphic designer to do this but i quickly got overwhelmed with logistics #and it's so close to christmas i didn't really want to deal with the timeline issue #i really should have done this three months ago but of course i procrastinated #anyway. the website kept being like are you SURE you positioned that image correctly? #and i was like nope! but i don't know what else to do so let's just try it and see what happens :) #it looked fine in the preview. living on the edge over here. the extreme sport of sticker designing

[mitiafrapp]

Eepy time 💤

#fanart #holotempus #lottyart #holostars #tempus hq #hq mascots #vesties #magmites #cultare #axelotl #ive been so sleepy today #even tho i got 7 hours of sleep #but i was more fine yesterday when i got 3 lol

[phoenixiancrystallist]

Do you ever have fanfic epiphanies at work? Me neither. Have a screenshot :)

:)

#Forspoken #Forspoken spoilers #in Tanta we trust #in Tanta we trust spoilers #itwt #itwt spoilers #Forspoken fanfic #WIPpets (WIP snippets) #this is fine :) #still haven't figured out what causes Rheddah to betray Athia and send a sassy nuke after them but meh that's a future!Bobbi problem lol #everything from ''Idea:'' down got typed out less than an hour into my shift lol #today's gonna be a good day :) #all productive and shit :) #I can tell :) :) :)

[caramelmochacrow]

happy birthday to arisa and happy (belated) birthday to yukina!! (im sorry yukina...)

#crow's scribbles #bang dream #bandori #yukina minato #arisa ichigaya #i just realized both of them are looking to the right lol #that was an accident! #the outfit of arisa is from my kasumi one but i added the star hair pins bc those are a bday gift from kasumi :) #yukina's outfit is from lisa and the whole thing is supposed to match w lisa haha #p obvious but kasu.ari and yuki.lisa is implied but not enough for me to tag it so yeah! #im sorry i forgot to post yukina's.... i got distracted bc of how nervous i was for school today (i had a lot of things to do) so it slippe #buuut at least i drew something! which is good! #i would've made arisa's match w kasumi's as well (kasumi looking at arisa as she took care of bonsai) but i didn't have enough time.... #still glad w the finished product tho! #now watch me go plan other bday art and a halloween drawing (maybe) #idk if i have time now tbh.... but if i dont do one then it's fine!

[hauntedselves]

i start a new job (my first "real", full time job) in the new year, and while financially (and employability-ly) im excited, im really dreading it. and ive built it up so much in my mind that just thinking about it triggers an anxiety spiral. really i know its just gonna be. awkward, difficult, maybe embarrassing. but not the end of the world.

my new medication (sertraline / zoloft) is finally at a point where the majority of the day, im not anxious. still anxious at times, it hasnt been a magic bullet, but a lot better. adjusting to it and coming off escitalopram was awful though.

the past 2 nights ive been very anxious, almost panic attack -like. not sure if thats a med issue or something else.

i had an alright holiday period, there was of course some triggering going on (unavoidable around my stepdad, and my mum tries to micromanage it so much that it makes it worse) but overall it was ok. i hope everyone also had an at least ok holiday! (and if you didn't, im sorry & its over now!)

#dogpost #personal #hs' anxiety #i also got my helix pierced today which is cool. not nearly as painful (or as long lasting) as IM HRT lol so it was fine #i had to shop for some nice clothes for work though which as a short fat autistic trans man is awful as always. took me 3 hours to find - #- pants that fit me. and i still have to get them hemmed

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#ive had much fun booping with yall today :-] #i wish i had the time to boop everyone back #idk y it stands out to me the ppl with strang3r things icons. actually i do kno. its bc one person with an eddie icon booped me a lot of #times lol. but im a lowkey st3ddie shipper and im just sitter here silently like. hm i see yall with steve and eddie icons #and anyone with a terror icon has me twirling my hair bc i just want ppl in that fandom to like me for my obnoxious jammy posts lol #and to my beloved ppl who regularly like my stuff but we aren't mutials for whatever reason 🖤 #idk its just been a nice day lol. its nice outside and i was jsut grading all day. the days just seem longer now that its light so late #wish i had time to draw more than scribbles but alas ive got way too much to do this week :-P #ive gotta meet my boss Tomorrow and i havent even looked at the thing i was supposed to work on. and i have to choose a paper by Wednesday #for lab meeting. ugh. whatever. itll be fun. itll be fine. genuinely i feel good in a way that i thought was impossible a year ago #unrelated

[babacontainsmultitudes]

Blasting my psyonic beam at whoever's in range to explain how the Tenacious D covers of "Wicked Game" and "I think I love you" sound how closeson feels. To me. Unrelated, I'm not usually all that into zombie apocalypse AUs but I think Darryl and Glenn would be so fucking funny in that context and my mind keeps going back to it. Send post.

#I JUST KEEP THINKING ABOUT CLOSESON TODAY LOL IDK THEY'RE JUST SO CUTE #Oh in the zombie au Darryl totally rescues Glenn when they first meet btw #And Glenn is kinda pathetic but occasionally has good ideas and sings in a way that makes Darryl very flustered #Just imagine Darryl slinging Glenn over his shoulder and running from the zombos #As Glenn nonchalantly compliments how strong he is #and Darryl's face turns a deep shade of red but no. Gotta focus. #Darryl is looking for Grant and probably Carol also- they got separated #Glenn is hypothetically looking for Nick as well but heh he's a smart kid he's probably fine #[Cut to Nick Grant and Carol together and absolutely whooping zombie ass] #darryl wilson #glenn close #closeson

[silenthillbunni]

🏫🍃🌥️

#oooof... sleep was rough bc my face was super itchy. all of a sudden i got rashes in my face yesterday ?!?!? i have NEVER gotten that wtffff #hopefully it's just temporary nd will go away. it's still a tiny bit itchy but not as bad as yesterday :o #istg my life is a JOKE!!!! a joke!!!! rashes?!? what? maybe stress nd anxiety?? idk it's wild tho i cant deal w this #so i couldnt really fall asleep but i rested for a few hours #then i got up. took my dog out. had oatmeal. called the surgeron clinic. #and like... i told them abt my weight and they said im underweight?! and that my bmi is 18.9 and u need to have 19.... #i told her that i cant gain weight bc i cant eat anything. that i cant have more fat than i already do bc then it hurts too much #she said she'll talk to the anesthesia doctors and call me later. she hasnt called yet #i rlly hope they understand the situation?? and that i can still have my surgery bc what else am i supposed to do??? #ughhhh why cant anything ever just be easy and smooth for me?? #i am sooooo tired of all these hardships piling on top of eo #then i walked to school.. took me an hour and im spent now bc im so weak nd malnutrioned skskskks #and im in class... it's a long one. still more than an hour left :'( my head hurts #ugh i just wanna be fine for once in my life #but yeah im like 75% thru all the hard things i need to do today #just need to finish class nd then walk home nd then hopefully get a call back and then i can relax (as much as i can lol) #i hope the itching goes down (still wtf is my body doing? i have no patience for it anymore) nd i hope im not too underweight for surgery om