#i just don't think it should be anyone's first experience of the trace memory story lmao

[n7punk]

for all the None people who follow me and care about Trace Memory/Another Code (spoiler free I promise): if you're interested in the remaster, I recommend you only get it if you're getting it for the sequel that was never released in America. they changed a lot in Trace Memory (Another Code 1) and this isn't a "new is bad" thing (usually I prefer remasters), this is a "they cut puzzles, 'streamlined' the game, and reworked/removed the best scene in the entire game" kind of thing. the game undoubtedly looks better, but it's also missing some of the hand-drawn art that really added to its story. there are some improvements (the new voice acting is cool to have, especially having it be optional, and the way they implemented the autoplay feature for that is clever. there are some improved scenes they could rework with the benefit of 3D graphics and voice acting), but I don't think it should be your first Trace Memory experience.

if you can't get your hands on the DS line and an emulator isn't working for the puzzles (something I can see - some of them did actually need to be cut just for being janky or more difficult than they needed to be) and this is the only way you can ever experience the first game, I recommend it over not playing the game, I'm just saying it's not the original. from what I can tell they normed the style of the first game with the second, so it's brighter and all the dialogue and non-flashback cutscenes are rendered in game, which loses some of the impact of the stylistic comic panels. I never thought I'd prefer flat art to rendered cut scenes but in a game like this the hand-drawn, kinda gritty art did a LOT and the brightly-rendered 3D models just don't lend themselves to the mystery of all these people's deaths. I am excited to play the second game since, changes or not, this is the only way to experience it in America (like I said, I still recommend Another Code: Recollection if it's the only way you can experience Trace Memory), but I would say the remaster is mostly worth buying for the sequel if you like the original game.

#might do a more in depth post later #definitely wanted to keep this free of any spoiler since i Love the story #also can i just say. my understanding is that it was always known as 'another code' in japan #so they changed it from trace memory to the 'real' name in the remaster #but the problem with that is languages differ and i bet people calling it 'the another' sounds less fucking dumb in japanese #because calling something 'the trace' worked a lot better in the original #like just. this is literally the opening cutscene when you boot up the game before even the starting menu so no spoilers #'dual another system' sounds WAY weirder than 'dual trace system' #this is a very minor gripe #i was genuinely excited the whole way through to be playing the game again and it is fun #i just don't think it should be anyone's first experience of the trace memory story lmao #words and things #trace memory #another code #another code: recollection

[astro-rain]

delicate; b.barnes

chapter six - “lake, the sequel”

delicate masterlist

word count: 1.7k

synopsis: reader seeks out bucky after his dramatic exit and they find themselves earnestly conversing... back at the lake

pairings: bucky barnes x fem!reader

[A/N]: this story is available on my wattpad as a bucky x OC fic @ / typicaldaze :)

He didn't like this feeling. No, he didn't like this feeling at all. He hated it, in fact. It was betrayal, bodily betrayal. He just could not sit in that room any longer or he would've peeled his skin off. His lungs felt as if they were bound with barbed wire and the state of his stomach had him worried he was going to throw up. Most of all he felt guilty. How could he have just stormed out of the room like that? She was going to hate him now. How could he let this happen?

He was thinking this over whilst sitting at the lake, hands in the grass, trying to distract the physical body from the mental cacophony he had just endured. He had somehow found his way there after leaving Y/N. These extremely unpleasant sensations were unfamiliar. Was he sick? Could he have been drugged? He was so confused. Bucky realized he seemed to be confused most of the time. Following that realization, he became mildly pissed off.

The super soldier stared out at the lake. It was a calm day, the water tranquil and clear. It was a stark contrast against his stress. He leaned forward and looked into the water at his reflection.

"Damn," he said out loud.

Is that really what I look like now?

His eyes traced over the long shaggy hair, dark under eyes, and the subtle but noticeable worry lines. This sight reminded him of when he broke the mirror at his old place in Bucharest. Now he remembered why. God, he looked as fucked up as he was. He leaned back and tossed a stone at where his reflection had been.

A deep sigh left his lungs, which were now conveniently working properly.

"Fuckers," he muttered, referring to the mercurial organs.

He had spent nearly two years alone in Bucharest, and he had grown accustomed to living in this new body. He was always on edge, that much he could tell. However, he was never too introspective; he never thought about his feelings or his behavior. All he was focused on was surviving. When there is more to life than survival, that's when things get complicated... not that they weren't complicated before. God, he was running in circles inside his own mind. His scarred and ruined and manipulated mind that resided in this body that was used as a tool for destruction and violence and death-

"Hey."

His head whipped around, startled out of his thought frenzy. Always on edge. Mentally, he shook his head in disappointment.

"Oh! (Y/N)!"

He stood up immediately. "Listen, I'm so sorry about before, I don't know what-"

"It's okay," she said quickly, holding up her hands. "Bucky, you do not need to apologize, everything is totally fine."

He was taken aback. Words didn't seem to work.

"I'm not mad if that's what you were thinking," she said.

"You're not?"

"No, of course not. If anything I was worried."

"I- Worried?"

"Yes, you were clearly in distress, and that room was the last place you wanted to be. I'm glad you found your way back here because you look much better now," (Y/N) explained with earnest eyes.

She could tell he was freaked out? She probably thinks he's insane.

"Yeah, I... I think I'm better now."

He was far from okay, but definitely better than before.

The psychologist sat down next to where he was standing. He didn't move, but looked down at her.

"I don't think it'd be wise to leave you alone here considering you're supposed to be in a session with me right now and you can't go anywhere without an escort. It would most likely lead to suspicion and then trouble you don't need. I'm going to stay with you. We can continue the session if you'd like, but if not we can just sit."

She said this all while looking straight forward at the water.

In all honesty he wasn't sure what to say, so he settled with a breathy, "Okay," before sitting down next to her.

"I'm getting the vibe that this is more of a just sit situation..."

"Yeah... I think I'm all therapy-ed out for today," Bucky said in a meek attempt at a joke.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw a wide smile. He then realized that she didn't know he could see it, and that's why this smile seemed different. Most differents in Bucky's life hadn't been outstandingly pleasant. But this was a welcome different. This was a good different. It was genuine and unbridled. That was the most open he'd ever seen her.

Every now and then he forgot that he was a literal trained super spy. He may not have any PhD's, but he had his own way of reading behavior, cues, and subtleties. Perhaps he'd make an effort to be more observant. Perhaps he wanted to learn a little more about what else was behind this new different.

A few beats of comfortable silence passed before he heard the word again.

"Hey," (Y/N) started softly. "I'm sorry if I went a little too far today. I know I said our first session wouldn't be much, but I realize I was pushing too far."

"Oh, it's okay," Bucky replied, looking down at the grass between his knees. "I think it's more my fault anyway. It's not like the questions were super intense."

He let out a loaded sigh. "I don't know what's wrong with me."

"Bucky it's really okay. If it's anyone's fault it's mine. This whole process is supposed to be based on your comfort levels and at your own pace. And there's nothing wrong with you. Your reaction was completely normal given the circumstances."

Bucky wasn't terribly familiar with reassurance. He turned his head, looking at her dead on. She was so genuine, like she knew all of what she was saying was the all encompassing truth.

Echoes of different combinations of "there's nothing wrong with you" and "completely normal" and "your own pace" flitted around inside him until they melted into a feeling he hadn't felt in so long: hope. It was horrifying... yet it gave him a kind of relief he didn't know he could feel.

The super soldier then realized that (Y/N) was looking right back at him dead on. He was about to stumble through some sort of apology for staring or thankful expression for her kindness, but he noticed that she didn't look like she was necessarily waiting for a response. She was just... looking.

Bucky tried to say something, anything. But he just couldn't seem to pull his eyes away. In this brief moment, he felt crystallized. His conscious, logical brain was somewhere far away, hypnotized by the stillness of the moment. It was only a few seconds, but somehow felt longer. These very few seconds of mental sedation were soon over.

Speak, idiot.

He snapped back to reality, suddenly finding himself inspecting at the grass below him.

"Thank you."

"Of course," she replied without missing a beat. Her tone of voice was water soft.

"(Y/N), do you... do you know what happened with me earlier?" he asked, cautiously. "Like, what was wrong- I mean, not wrong but why I-"

He sighed frustratingly, cutting himself off.

Her face was patient, but she was waiting for a description of something he didn't know how to describe.

"I know I said we were done for today, but I-I don't know how to explain it, and I want to know what it is," he confessed.

"I think you had an anxiety attack."

Anxiety? That couldn't be right. There's no way that could've been from being nervous.

"What?" he asked incredulously.

"Anxiety. It seemed as though you were experiencing high amounts of anxiety. Most people get nervous at times, but those tiny amounts are normal. But, some other people are a lot more nervous a lot more of the time. Sometimes, these peoples' anxiety can get particularly high and be so overwhelming that their body kinda takes over, and they can experience really uncomfortable physical symptoms, and this can turn into an anxiety attack."

"I thought I was... sick or... or drugged or something."

"Well, I'm almost certain you weren't drugged, and I'm pretty sure you can't even get sick."

"Oh."

He honestly didn't know what to say.

"Bucky," she looked straight at him again and he almost felt himself slipping. "In terms of psychology, a lot has progressed since the 40's. I'm not sure how anxiety was presented or studied then, but there's really a lot more to it than people think. And honestly, given your situation, it would be strange if you didn't develop an anxiety disorder."

Anxiety disorder?

"Anxiety disorder? I have that?"

"Well, again, I think we have to do more work to confirm, but that's what it seems like."

"I thought you said I had PTSD?"

"I do. I think you have both."

Christ.

"Wow, I'm a whole sack 'a problems, aren't I?" he chuckled, giving up on trying to internally oppose his short comings.

"You're not a problem, Buck. You had to deal with a whole sack of problems, though," she smiled.

The nickname didn't miss his radar. Was that the first time she's called him that? He ignored how he liked it.

"That's for damn sure."

They conversed for a while after that, and didn't seem to notice how late it was until the sun began to set. The ending day's reflection on the water created an aura so relaxing Bucky didn't want to move. But alas, reality calls.

(Y/N) stood up. "If you're not back soon, they'll start looking for you. We should probably get going."

Bucky stood up, too, following her request.

"I'll walk you back to your quarters," she offered.

And so they went, conversation continuing naturally, as if they were old friends. Bucky found it strange that someone he knew so little was so easy to talk to. He brushed it off as some inherent therapist quality.

He still found her hard to read although he knew her more with each passing word between them.

Despite all of this, the walk back, with cool air, a melting sky, and languid steps, was the best thing he had experienced since coming out of cryo. His memory may be spotty, and his mind may be rough, but this, this he was sure of.

#bucky barnes #bucky fanfic #bucky headcanon #marvel #steve rogers #bucky reader insert #marvel fanfiction #bucky blurb #bucky drabble #bucky fic #james bucky barnes #james buchanan bucky barnes #james buchanan barnes #bucky x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky x you #bucky x female reader #captain america fanfiction #marvel fanfic rec

[psychologeek-blog1]

A to Z of Human Emotions

Let’s do a quick test: list every emotion you can recall without searching anywhere or asking anyone.

You ready? Go.

I’ll wait.

…

How many words did you come up with? 4? 8? 10? More than that?

Every day, you experience a wide range of emotions you aren’t even aware of (yes, even as an adult). Recognizing different types of emotions and facial expressions build up your emotional intelligence which is the key skill you need to thrive in the world.

(GIF by JosepBernaus on Dribbble)

In this post, I’ll give you an A to Z of of emotion vocabularies. You’ll find some of words from different cultures and languages (some of which are taken from Tiffany Watt Smith’s The Book of Human Emotions). Instead of trusting your memory, I recommend you to save this post to come back to it from time to time to increase your emotional awareness.

Now without further delay, here’s the list of human emotions and feelings arranged in the alphabetical order:

A

Acedia or sometimes called accidie, is an emotion that has no real equivalent today. It was a short-lived but disastrous emotional crisis, usually striking between 11 a.m. and 4 p.m. Its first signs were listlessness and irritability, but it didn’t take long to turn into desolation and despair.

B

Bafflement is a condition when someone faced too many options, particularly those poorly arranged in a disorderly heap, make it hard to follow, or know which direction we should proceed, leaving us feeling frustrated, or angry, even bilious, but most of all exhausted by a surfeit of information that creates a sense of blockage, and precipitates a feeling of existential angst for the random purposelessness of things.

C

Cheesed off is a form of irritation feeling; often described as being ‘browned off’. The expression ‘cheesed off’ can be traced back to the nineteenth century, used by the pilots comparing themselves to rusting engines. The reason why it became so popular among airmen remains a mystery. Some say it’s because cheese turns brown under a grill. Others, because cheese on toast was obsessively eaten while waiting, and the men were, quite literally, fed up with it.

D

Dismay is a feeling of horror and paralysis. It flattens us; it might make us cover our eyes. The term descended from desmaier–Old French, came to describe a feeling; in other European languages, desmaier morphed into words for falling unconscious; in Spanish, desmayo is a swoon; in Portuguese, desmaio is a fainting fit.

E

Envy is a desire to have the material possessions and advantages of others. It’s the sickness that comes on hearing another’s happy sigh, the ache of contemplating their success. As adults, we mostly feel it as a secret vice. It’s there behind the rictus grin that celebrates other people’s successes.

F

Fago is the pity felt for someone in need, which compels us to care for them, but it is also haunted by a strong sense that one day we will lose them. Fago comes in those moments when our love for others, and their need for us, feels so unexpectedly overwhelming—and life so very fragile and temporary—that we well up.

G

Gladsomeness describes the appearance of a glittering, shining thing. This meaning still lingers in the expressions “glad rags” or “glad eye”—the twinkle that attracts a lover. In the fourteenth century, gladsum, or gladsomenesse, began to be used to describe a brightening of the soul too, a sparky, bouncing feeling, which today we might be more likely to call joy.

H

Hesitant (rooted from Latin word, haesitant), is a condition when you’re slow to act or proceed (as from fear, indecision, or unwillingness). If you are hesitant, you do not do something immediately or quickly because you are nervous or not certain. 

I

If you are inquisitive that means you love to inquire; you're always asking questions. You are eager to know a lot about people or things, sometimes in a way that annoys people. 

J

Jealousy involves the fear of losing a person or their affections to someone else. It is triangular: me (the victim), you (the traitor) and the other (the thief). Such treacheries are all the more painful for the feeling of having been discarded. It is this threat that makes jealousy so inflammatory—and intimacy such a risk.

K

Keen came from the Old English word, cene, that translates to ‘bold and brave’ and while the spelling is now really different, the sounds are similar. If you are keen on doing something, you are very interested, eager, or wanting to do that thing very much.

L

Lenient means tolerant or relaxed, and is usually used when we’re talking about someone’s attitude toward discipline. If you're not overly strict, and you show tolerance and mercy when someone does something wrong, then you're being lenient.

M

Malu, roots from Bahasa Indonesia, is the sudden experience of feeling constricted, inferior and awkward around people of higher status than us. You might be experiencing malu if you clam up before your partner’s parents, or a conversation with a former headmistress leaves you staring at the floor and sweating.

N

The word neglect comes from the Latin verb, neglegere, which means ‘disregarded’. Neglect is worse than ignoring something. It's ignoring it, failing to care for it, and probably harming it in the process.

O

When something isn't fair, or offends you, it often results in your feeling outraged. When you're outraged, you're furious. When you're outraged, you're furious. You might be outraged over the rude treatment you get at a fancy, expensive restaurant.

P

Pathos is a quality that stirs emotions (especially pity or sorrow). A song with a lot of pathos hits you right in the heart. When someone tells a story about people suffering that makes you feel for them, that's pathos.

R

Came from an old French word meaning ‘carried away’, rapture is a feeling of emotional ecstasy so magical it's almost as if you've been transported to some other world. It's happiness so extreme that you just about float to heaven, complete with big goofy grin plastered to your face.

S

Serenity came from the Latin, serenus, meaning ‘calm or peaceful’, plus the English suffix -ity, meaning ‘quality or state of’. Serenity used to describe a state when your mind is still and perfectly calm.

T

Triumph came from the Latin, triumphus, which means an ‘achievement, success, procession for a victorious general or admiral’. It'll make you pump your fist and yell "Hurrah!"

U

Uneasy describes an uncomfortable feeling. You might feel socially uneasy when dining with your girlfriend's parents if they don't like you very much. Your stomach may also feel uneasy at that same dinner and gurgle in an embarrassing way.

V

If you spend all day admiring yourself in reflective surfaces — mirrors, pools of water, the backs of spoons — people may think you are conceited, or vain.

W

The German word Wanderlust describes a kind of longing for movement that runs as deep in the human psyche as love or fear. It’s the desire, as old as human life itself, to see what lies beyond the next mountain, or outside the boundaries of the village—and may leave us with the gnawing feeling that life only makes sense if we are traveling in some direction or another.

Y

A yearning is a strong desire. If you have a yearning to travel in Maldives, it means that you dream about it and intensely hope that one day you'll end up there.

Z

Zeal is dedication or enthusiasm for something. If you have zeal, you're willing, energized, and motivated. If you have passion for something, you have zeal, which is kind of a mix of eagerness and energy and devotion.

That’s all, folks! Isn’t it amazing how many of these emotions we already felt but didn’t know there was a word of it?

If you keep expanding your emotional vocabulary, you’ll be much more comfortable when dealing with your negative emotions and much quicker to appreaciate the positive emotions.

How many new words did you learn today from the list of emotions? Share this post with your friends with one new word you learned today.