#idek wtf is angst lmao
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Our Own Choices
Chapter 9
"So how'd you know I was on that gunship? I was specifically extra stealthy that time," I ask Rex as we jump off the vehicle that Crosshair was driving as we arrive back at the base. I put on my helmet.
"You've done it 19 times, kid. I know when you've clipped yourself to the outside of the gunship just by the sound of it," Rex replies, not bothering to look at me. He's not even bothering to scold me for coming here without his permission. I think he's just tired of me, he does have a job to do as a captain as well.
But why should I listen to him anymore? Even though he's technically my superior in the GAR, I don't need him anymore. I'm biologically 20, I can handle myself. But clearly he doesn't think so, considering how he usually doesn't let me on missions anyways. He says the reason that he grounded me was because he didn't want me getting myself killed out in the battlefield because of my impulsiveness.
"But there was no sound-" I protest as the bad batch walk past me, and I stare at them as they walk to their ship.
They're really cool. They don't fit in here, just like me.
Rex nudges me in the side, I take it as a sign to go to the ship as well. Rex says he talked to General Skywalker and he says that he'll have to wait for the council to approve of the mission to Skako Minor to get Echo. I'm surprised that he lets me come along on this mission. I guess he knows that there's no stopping me when it comes to saving my brothers.
As I head into the ship, I receive looks from the batch.
"What?" I ask.
Tech looks back to his datapad, Wrecker goes to lift the gonk droid in the back of the ship, Hunter just sits there staring at me, and Crosshair is checking his rifle. I take off my helmet and lean against a wall, staring at Wrecker and the poor gonk droid, and then to toothpick boi.
Gotta admit, their armor is really cool. Crosshair's got that belt thingy with a bunch of places to store ammo, almost like my own. And then he's got that bar thingy on his left shoulder armor, probably for his rifle or something. Hunter has a random bandana for the dog shit on his head, with a small skull on it. Wrecker's helmet would scare the absolute shit outta me if I saw that first thing in the morning. Tech's helmet is cool, at least it hides his receding hairline. Whatever. At least now I'm not the only one with dark-colored armor.
Anyways, Rex and General Skywalker board the ship soon enough and we set off for Skako Minor. Tech's flying the ship, while General Skywalker checks out Crosshair's rifle and Wrecker's still lifting poor Gonky.
"So, how many missions has your team been on, Sergeant?" General Skywalker asks Shithair as he passes Crosshair's rifle back to him.
"Honestly sir, I've lost count. All the action sorta blurs together," Hunter replies, and that felt like a big "skill issue lmao" smack in the face.
"I know you work with Cody sometimes, but who do you guys report to?" Rex asks.
"Hm, good question," Hunter says, crossing his arms. "Can't say I've got an answer."
And then I'm reminded of that "good question" Shrek meme that I saw on the holonet a few days before I came to Anaxes, and I try to keep a straight face.
Wrecker, who's still lifting Gonky, chews on a big ass chicken drumstick which I think was kept in the ship's storage area for days. Then, the ship suddenly shakes.
"We are approaching Skako Minor," Tech reports. "It looks to be a difficult landing."
So we strap in and Wrecker gently sets Gonky down, before going to the co-pilot's seat with Tech. The ship shakes a bit until we land on the ground, and we stand up and head towards Tech and Wrecker.
"Rex, what do we know about this place?" General Skywalker asks, Rex standing next to him. Toothpick boi and I stand behind them as I play with my knife, because I'm just kinda bored and need something to do with my hands.
"On this part of Skako, there's a race of locals, the Poletecs. All we know is they're very primitive," Rex replies.
"Primitive is being kind," Tech says. "My intel says the Poletecs worship flying reptiles."
Suddenly, one of those flying reptile thingies land on the front window of the ship, cracking it slightly. I look out, sheathing my knife into my wrist compartment.
"Oh! What the heck was that?" Wrecker looks out the same time as I do.
"It's one of those reptiles," Tech says.
"I want that thing off my ship," Hunter says, sounding really annoyed, before moving to get off the ship.
"Hold on! Hold on! Don't just run out there," Rex tries to warn them but we all run out anyways because which one of us even follows orders?
We see the Poletec and a flying reptile thing jumping on the ship. General Skywalker ignites his lightsaber and Wrecker points his blaster at it, and I'm tempted to do the same.
"Hey! Get off of there!" Wrecker shouts.
"Hey, calm down. We needa talk to them," General Skywalker says.
"Why?" Hunter asks.
"The General's right," Rex says, and then I hear some more flying reptiles in the distance, and I spin around to look at them, blaster and sword drawn. General Skywalker pushes Rex out of the way so that Rex doesn't get clawed to death by the reptiles. We all point our blasters towards them, unsure of whether to shoot or not.
Suddenly, the flying reptile and the Poletec on the ship swoop down and grab General Skywalker. He's caught off guard, dropping his lightsaber, and I throw my knife at the reptile before it can get too far away. It hits the reptile in the chest, but not deep enough to be a lethal shot, although I can hear it screeching as it flies away. Rex fires his pistol at the reptile but none of the shots hit.
"I have a thermal reading," Tech says. "Point two five east, elevation 175." His visor is lowered.
"Relax. I'll handle this," Crosshair says, before attaching a grappling hook to his rifle and using Tech's shoulder as support (we'll never get to see this again this is so sad), shooting it at the reptile. It hits and Hunter attaches the cable to himself.
"What are you doing?" Rex asks.
"Going for a ride." And then Hunter's lifted off his feet, flying into the air.
I just stare at Crosshair, eyes widened. Holy shit that was fucking cool. Bro really has to be so pro at sniping.
And then I think of my own sniping skills which are slightly decent at best and suddenly I'm filled with a slight jealousy of his skills. Like bro he gets to be badass and do all those fucking trick shots and I'm stuck here throwing knives.
Shut up.
"Tech, I'm with the General. Hone in on my signal," I hear Hunter say through the comms. Tech and the rest of us head back to the ship and do so, before heading to Hunter's location. We land on a ridge near what looks like the Poletec village and run down to Hunter, who's near the edge, looking across at the village.
"That creature still has a hold of the General," Hunter says.
Rex zooms in on the village, and I do the same, seeing the General getting pinned under one of those reptiles' claws. "We're going in, but remember what the General said. No casualties, disarm only," Rex says.
"We're on it, Captain," Hunter says. "Wrecker, Crosshair, rockslide."
The rest of us slide down the ridge to the village as Wrecker and Crosshair push a really big rock down the ridge, and we run behind it as it knocks down some tall but not-so-advanced structures, using the dust as cover.
We shoot at the weapons that the Poletecs are holding, disarming them. I throw a few knives at their weapons, they all hit their target and disarm them.
We run to the place where General Skywalker is, and I see some electrified thing hit the claw that's holding General Skywalker, probably shot by Crosshair, and the reptile jumps back, letting General Skywalker dodge the rock that's rolling towards him. We all point our blasters at the Poletecs in case they try to do anything.
The Poletec that Hunter's pointing his blaster at speaks some alien language, and Hunter asks Tech to translate what he's saying.
Tech steps forward, presses a few buttons on that control panel on his wrist, and moves his visor down above his eyes. "He says he does not want our war on his planet. That is why he took our leader."
The rest of us still point our blasters at the Poletecs.
Can we just hold them at gun/knifepoint and just get them to give us whatever info we want?
"We didn't bring the war here. It was Wat Tambor and the Separatists," General Skywalker says.
Tech translates what General Skywalker said into the alien language, something that both Crosshair and I find kinda funny as I'm tryna hold in my laughter as we all lower our blasters. Definitely gotta roast Tech for that.
"Tell him we apologize for what's happened," Rex says. "But tell him the enemy is holding one of our men prisoner in Purkoll. As soon as we rescue him, we'll leave his planet for good."
Tech translates what Rex said into the alien language again, and I try my best to keep a straight face. This is just too funny.
As Tech and the Poletecs talk some more and agree about sending scouts and stuff to help find the city, I run to the reptile that I threw my knife into and rip it out. It's wedged kinda deep in there, and when I pull it out, it's covered in red blood, dripping onto the floor. The reptile screeches and tries to attack me, but I shoot it with a stun blaster a few times and it's knocked out. The other Poletecs move to attack me, but then Rex and Tech help to calm them all down.
"Woah woah woah, calm down, she's just tryna get her weapons, no need to panic," Rex says, and Tech helps translate it. The other Poletecs calm down when what I think is their leader nods at them.
I pull my other knives out from the weapons that I threw them at and head back to the others.
"Nice going," Crosshair knocks his shoulder into mine as we set off with the other scouts, the sarcasm in his voice is obvious. I cross my arms as I follow behind him. "Thanks."
We follow the scouts quite a bit of distance and find ourselves on a really high cliff. The Poletec scouts point at what looks like Purkoll in the distance before walking down the direction we just came up in.
"Hope nobody's scared of heights," General Skywalker says. I try not to let it show, although sometimes heights get on my nerves.
Hunter and Crosshair look at Wrecker.
"Well I'm not scared of nothing. I just...When I'm up real high, I got a problem with gravity," Wrecker says.
"That's being scared of heights, Wrecker. You're real smart," I roll my eyes under my helmet, standing next to Rex.
"Speaking of problems," Tech, who's standing behind Wrecker, speaks up. "I am no longer picking up Echo's signal."
"I...I don't understand," Rex says. "You said it was coming from this city." He points towards Purkoll.
"I can only speculate, but it is possible there's a latency issue with the frequency caused by all these atmospheric disturbances."
"Or, maybe they sent the signal to lure us into a trap," Hunter suggests. "And maybe your friend's actually dead." He folds his arms. "Well, I can't be the only one thinking of that."
"Every mission could be a trap," Rex and I say at the same time, and I glare at him, falling silent. "This one is no different," Rex continues. "I'm telling you that signal is being sent by Echo himself! He's alive!" I nudge Rex in the side. "Be realistic, Captain. There's not really a high chance that that's gonna happen."
"I think you're letting your personal feelings get in the way because you left him for dead at the Citadel," Crosshair says, and I clench my fist around one of my knives, which is sheathed in my belt right now. That eagerness to punch him in the face out of pure anger, it's strong, but I resist it. Not really the logical thing to do right now.
"I had no choice, you hear me?!" Rex, unlike me, isn't doing much of a good job hiding his anger.
"Oh, I don't blame you. I would've left him for dead too. Besides, he's just another reg."
I'm breathing heavily under my helmet, one hand gripped on the hilt of my knife, the other with my nails digging so hard into my skin, even though my glove, it leaves marks. Even though Crosshair is directing his words towards Rex, it's having an effect on me as well.
And then Rex punches Crosshair in the face/helmet, knocking him to the ground.
"Yoooo Rex, just chill!" I try to get him to calm down, but he's not stopping. I pull out my pistol and point it to Crosshair's head as Wrecker picks Rex up by the back of his armor. "I called first dibs."
"Hey! Why don't you pick on someone not your size?" Wrecker throws Rex to the ground, who almost instantly gets up, walking up real close to Wrecker. "You'll be a whole lot smaller when I'm through with you."
My pistol is still pointed to Crosshair's head, my finger resting on the trigger, my other hand drawing my knife and pressing it under his helmet and to his neck, I'm breathing heavily, all sense of logic gone, it's the same feeling when Fox killed Fives. And it's strong.
"That's enough!" General Skywalker puts a hand on Rex and Wrecker's shoulders, pushing them away from each other before Wrecker beats Rex to clone mush, and then he pushes me and Crosshair apart before I can get any more blood on my knife.
"Sergeant, take your men and scout the area for a tower entrance. I want to talk to my troopers alone," General Skywalker orders, sounding slightly fierce.
Rex and I stay behind as the batch walk away. Toothpick bitch glances back at us for a moment, before looking away.
"Rex, Aris, I hate to say it, but...you have to prepare yourself for the possibility that Echo is dead, and this is all a Separatist trick," General Skywalker puts a hand on our shoulders.
"Sir, I have watched so many of my brothers fall during this war, and I try not to hang on to any one of them," Rex says, taking off his helmet. "But that changed when I heard that Separatist transmission. It was no algorithm. That was Echo's voice. I know it."
"And if there's any chance that Echo, my brother, is still out there, alive, we have to take it," I add on, taking off my helmet as well.
"I hope you're right," General Skywalker says. "But if, for some reason, you're wrong..."
"Then I'll deal with it," Rex and I say at the same time.
And I've learned to deal with it on my own. No "Dad" to comfort me or help me. That's what I did with Fives. And if I have to do it again with Echo, I will.
All I'll need to do is constantly wipe the blood off my knives, and make sure no one sees the wounds on my arms.
#the bad batch#the bad batch crosshair#tbb#tbb crosshair#tbb hunter#tbb wrecker#tbb tech#the bad batch hunter#the bad batch tech#the bad batch wrecker#the clone wars#the clone wars season 7#tcw s7#skako minor#echo#the bad batch echo#tbb echo#ECHOS ALIVE#ct-1409#ct-7567#angst i assume#idek wtf is angst lmao#female clone#female clone oc
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okay so like i was gonna just start on this tonight and get the general ideas down and finish this when i was Awake and Functioning but then i started rambling so uhhh jazz handss
take me describing the diff energies ur fics give off, i am sorry if this is uncomprehensible fjwaewf (is that even a word?? incomprehensible? ye-)
through a glass divine: DEFFFF rainy day vibes, the au feels very Elegant to me even though glass!wilbur himself is very much not, when I read glass I get the same vibes as being in a car /pos, it's comforting but can get intense at times, sometimes with no warning. like one minute your head is against the glass (heh, pun unintended lol), and ur looking out at the streetlamps, the next the breaks are SLAMMED and u get whacked against the seatbelt lmfaoooo (this is all /pos !! i love the angst lol)
world forgetting: FOGGG, that's the first thought that pops into my head, things are unclear first and it's a little eerie but there's also something comforting about it (i will use this word a lot bc . well ur writing is comforting hehehe), the first half of wf was very exciting, it reminded me of when i used to have my mcu marathons, edge of my seat, shoving popcorn into my face, and just glee, the first few chapters with wf especially with the combat made me so fucking giddy lmfaooo i had so much fun reading it, the second half was a lot more calm and melancholy, it was defff sitting on the couch while it rains outside vibes, like MM the hurt comfort?? give me a blanket and a pillow to squeeze bc hot damnn
stars and their children: stars man . hooweeee, this fic was binging a 12 season show vibes, you invest a lot into it and wow the emotional damage?? for real. this fic was late night rants at sleepovers, theorizing n coming up with silly conspiracy theories (i think this was when i really started reading the asks, so for me it has a lot of those vibes tied to it), when i read stars… i feel a lot of Awe. it feels big, it feels important, it also feels like im reading a very fancy novel from a very big library, like i feel like i've stepped into a massive multi-tiered library and plucked my favourite book from its shelf, i can imagine the hardcover being absolutely gorgeous, it gives me the same vibes as getting assigned a book to read in class and having your mind blown /pos from it, like "damn i understand why they make us read this bc wow"
(fun fact i have ur ao3 page bookmarked on my toolbar lmaoooo)
honey and tangerines: well . this one just gives me island and coastal vibes lolll u described them very well, but okay from a reading perspective? besides indie movie lmao. i'd say… hanging out with a friend you haven't seen in a while. it's familiar, it's bittersweet, it's thrilling. honey and tangerines gives me the vibes of doing something youve been wanting to for awhile but were always too scared to. pushing your boundaries. it's all those classic "finally living life vibes", staying out till 3 am, finally getting around to decorating your room, going on a roadtrip. when i read honey and tangerines, it feels like i'm experiencing life. all the prev fics either feel like novels or movies, but hats feels like life
what the water gave me: ngl when i read this i just feel such pure emotion that i cry like idek how to explain it man. it's so all encompassing /pos it does give me staying up late in my room with fairy lights vibes though, dunno why. just gives off that same warm energy
A DUSTY TOMB OMGGOJEAWE i need to reread that
anyways
a dusty tomb: straight off the bat, playing dnd. dnd is so much fun and i have so many happy memories from it and a dusty tomb defff gives off those vibes, chaos, freeing, family. it also gives off the vibe of finding a piece of old writing in a buried notebook and reading it and going "wtf?? when did i write this this is amazing" maybe that's just bc it feels like u read my mind writing it lmao it's perfect i adore it so much and i have reread it an unholy amount of times, i just get the vibes of sitting criss cross on the floor and reading it, it's not necessarily a comfy position but it's enjoyable nonetheless, just a happy moment for oneself, it feels like giving yourself a treat, self care, all of that good stufff
no time confounds me: def feels like watching a tv show /pos, it def feels like smth i'd put on w my stepmom or my birth mom and just absolutely fucking Vibe to it bro, that fic is suchhh a vibe, i'd sink into my couch and get HOOKED, it also ofc brings w it all the vibes of just where i live LMAO, and the motorcycling reminds me of my dad <333 i miss motorcycling with him dawggg it's so much fun, but yeahhh. all the vibes described in the fic just make me want to go out for a hike in a forest lmao, i love it. also hot chocolate. this fic is defff drinking hot chocolate vibes
nocturnal animals: ooohh this one is defff late night vibes, working late on hw and looking out ur window and just taking a moment to appreciate the stars n stuff, also windy day vibes, this def feels like a novel my friend would shove at me to read and i'd be like "brooo i dont even LIKE vampires" and theyd be like "no bro just trust me" and then i'd be really bored one day so i'd pick it up and then get addicted . and then in this hypothetical series that has like a billion books i'd go to the library and borrow them all and binge them in a week lmfao, i love this fic sm ngl, i would proudly display this fic on my bookshelf (well i mean, i would literally display all of ur fics on my bookshelf KING i would have a shelf dedicated to ur fics 100%)
okay… i think those are all the main fics, there're a couple more that i've read but i am . getting really really reallyyy tired and idek if any of this is comphrensible lmfaooo 😭 😭 😭
i hope u enjoyed bee <333 tldr: i love ur writing and i have core memories attached to all of these fics and they are all special to me in their own way <33
ohhhh these are so cool to read icy (sorry it took me so long to respond I've been so busy lately)
lmao love all the drama in glass being compared to a car braking super suddenly. rainy car drives is definitely not the vibe I think it has in my head but that's super sweet to imagine :)
comparing stars to a Big Fancy Book makes me so happy thank you so much. I have this absolutely gorgeous fancy version of Dune with a stunning cover and I always imagine something kind of similar as the 'cover' for stars in my head so i love that you imagine that too
in contrast you and i feel the exact same about honey and tangerines. it's definitely that kind of bittersweet reconciling friendship vibe. saying it feels like life means so much thank you <33 thats exactly what I was going for
to me what the water gave me feels like swimming in a warm tropical ocean at night which might be a bit on the nose but yeah that's what I think of. but fairy lights in a room sounds so nice I love that
awww I love that idea for dusty tomb. just rereading something nostalgic and wonderful and feeling so comforted by it. that makes me smile a lot to imagine :)
hot chocolate and watching a tv show YEAHHHH you get it that's exactly what i was going for from no time confounds me. also that's so funny that you mention motorcycling with your dad bc that's where my descriptions of riding motorcycles comes from. my dad always used to pick me up from school on his motorcycle when I was a little kid, it was so much fun
oooo windy day for nocturnal animals is interesting but I love it. also god you saying it feels like a series with dozens of books reminds me of this vampire series i read in middle school that had like 10 books it's absolutely nothing like nocturnal animals but now I'm having a nostalgia trip thinking about it lol
thank you icy this was so sweet to read :)
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bby pls it’s a crime to put “trash” and any of ur fics in the same sentence 😞💗 i finally had time to read it andddd ‼️‼️ honest feelings it was intriguing and omg i felt so bad for yn cuz hee own family was the one hurting her the most her mom was a poor excuse of a human. a waste of resources in the world 👹 and like wtf how could u look at hee and be like “meh imma js use him and then leave” I WOULD SLAP MYSELF OKAY? like what’s wrong with the mom 🫥
the whoep storyline was like soooo good aaaaaa they things they did behind the mom’s heehhehehe so hot. but when hee “broke it off” omgg my heart broke for them. not them both hiding the fact that they were hurting sigh the angst hit hard BUT IT WAS THE RIGHT AMOUNT CUZ WE GOT TO SEE JEALOUS STEPDADDY HEE AHAHAHHA he’s so possessive i love like imagine being called “my princess” “my girl” and he fucking claimed her pussy and her whole being essentially ‼️ (toxic behavior for irl men but it’s hee soooo we can turn a blind eye heheheh) and i loveeee how u made yn pretend like that disgusting bully was actually her bf js to make hee jealous ehehehhehhe they’re so silly i love them
however…there were some parts i feel like u could’ve elaborated or written more? BUT THATS JS CUZ I WANT TO READ MORE OF UR AMAZING WRITING 😣🫶🏻
oh and also one last thing (sorry) when hee said he had cameras all over the house so that they have evidence of the abuse and stuff 👀 so…he basically also has footage of yn and him fucking…all over the house…in all sorts of positions 👀 AAAAAAAA I SQUEALED IDEK IF THATS TRUE BUT IF IT IS IDK THATS KINDA HOT
Ok i’m done for now i js wanted to express how much i liked it 😞🫶🏻‼️💗
ily muah pls take care of urself 💞
Why do I lowkey like the mom tho? Lmao 😂 I mean she’s a bitch of course but the way she treated hee was like ?? I think I went overboard 😭 especially with the whole “you’re not her real dad” her to toxicity was off the charts
But then hee is kinda stupid for staying with her for so long but the poor man was so in love and just wanted his little family to stay together even if she was treating him like less than trash and giving him zero attention 😞
And same I had to take out so many parts cause the dots just weren’t connecting I still think I could have done a bit more of a backstory but by the time I tried I was too far into the story so I just had to go with it and do the best I could
The first sex scene was so so different from the initial one but I think the one I used was better
That being said though y/n has been through the mud ☹️ and the part where hee broke things off that’s what I wanted to go into more detail about but i couldn’t word it better to save my life (real) and I still can’t even describe it 😐
But overall I’m glad everyone seemed to enjoy it I’m just a little bit disappointed with this one 🫤
Thanks for the feedback I really do appreciate it you’re one of a kind 💙 hope you have a good day today!!!!
Btw yes them fucking is on camera too 🫣
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#I'mNotChangingTheirStoryI'mNotChangingTheirStoryI'mNot--
Doitdoitdoitdoitdoit- *shot*
OK LOL DON'T DO THAT. Actually, I say that but I honestly love this idea a lot and it'd make Keith's reaction to Pico's sudden break up with him even more heartbreaking in retrospect.
After all, the friend you thought was dead this entire time suddenly shows up alive again after all of these years. Pico not knowing him can easily be handwaved as the ginger not having kept up with his old childhood friend's life (partly because he was more focused on making sure his family was okay and somewhat because he might've not trusted himself to not try to reconnect with his old friend perhaps? Who knows! You decide~!); Keith most likely hadn't had his transition back then so he still looked like a girl and went by his old name so makes sense Pico wouldn't recognize him. As for Keith not bringing it up, perhaps he wasn't fully sure this cranky ginger was the same friend he had known all those years ago. It'd make sense he'd refrain from informing Pico until he was absolutely certain.
Also this scenario would give more pain to Otis because in this verse Keith and his family would've kept in touch with Pico's family right? True there might be some unintentional distancing from those on the ginger's side but I imagine that's more in response to all of the shit that happened. ANYWAY back to Otis, imagine his reaction if Keith were to call him up soon after his first encounter with Pico to inform him. Perhaps Otis would confirm albeit not outright that perhaps it IS Pico (because let's be honest he wouldn't have the heart to fully lie to Keith there so make sense he'd hint at it). Maybe this bit doesn't happen but still something to think about! After all, just imagine the extra douse of angst here~
Oooooh. Consider Pico's reaction when he learns who Keith is too! I don't know if Keith will reveal who he is at some point or if he refrains for whatever reason (perhaps some part of him is worried about being accepted?? Maybe he still was hesitant for some reason??? IDEK). Since Pico later becomes convince Keith is a figment of his messed-up mind, it's very possible he would end up believing Keith isn't his old childhood friend. I can see him faltering for a moment, wanting to believe Keith is actually really and perhaps even almost giving into that hopeful side, only to shove it aside because of those stated reasons you gave before on why the breakup even happened.
Now imagine him, unlike before, mentioning a bit of Keith to Darnell and Nene, telling them about this supposed illusion of their old pal. Now imagine Darnell's and Nene's reactions later upon learning that the supposed illusion wasn't actually some figment of Pico's messed-up mind but ACTUALLY REAL. Now, not to say they wouldn't be understanding, but let's be real a part of them would still be like "Pico wtf".
Also please consider Grammy's reaction to seeing Pico again after he got reconciled with Keith and got together with him and Amelia. I dunno about you but I can't unsee her being accepting of him but also giving him a good smack with a slipper. Okay that last bit is probably ooc but wanted to mention because it was stuck in my head lmao
ANYWAY WOW THIS GOT VERY LONG LOL. SORRY ABOUT THAT.
As much as I'd love you to make this a part of their canon, I know you've already established quite a bit of stuff here already and I know all too well how frustrating it can be to go back to change stuff up. So don't worry about it okay? You can just make this like a one-shot thing or just something fun to ramble and imagine about.
I would love to make this an official thing, but I feel like I would have to change just enough stuff that it'd bug me, which friggin sucks. I also don't know if Keith would want to be with Pico again if this was canon, because to lose him a SECOND time would hurt. A bad part of his brain might make him believe that Pico was hiding from him with ill intention or something, so to have Pico yell and hold a gun to him that he's some fake illusion? That'll hurt
"Twice.. twice you're leaving me, and it doesn't make any sense!"
It's a great backstory, but it might have to be saved for another person's version of BF and Pico
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i need to go to sleep but i keep thinking Sad Sawyer Thoughts
#and idek how to properly express my sad sawyer thoughts theyre kinda just a jumbled mess of melancholy feelings rn#idk im thinking about how nubbins is definitely a childhood nickname#he was presumably a small kid..#anyway i just. been thinking about how thats the name that drayton used to refer to his corpse#and thinking about them as kids :/#thinking about how drayton is like. obviously hes a Phreak but hes also the most mentally stable and normal of all of them#hes not like chop. he hasnt wrapped himself up in a bubble pretending that his brother is fine.#he raised that kid#i keep thinking about how it must break his heart to see his little brother like that. especially right after it happened.#im sorry im just so sad rn wtf#kinda wanna write some sad ass angst lmao#bug.txt
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you did it! you got me upset with hobi,
DO NOT DISRESPECT MY BBY GIRL PETAL EVER AGAIN OK SIR HOSEOK? THANKS
duuuuude, one thing is the lies, another thing is wHY the liesss, BUT! does he have any idea what we felt the whole time after the conversation with peaches until he came home??
i swear that drabble got me some real flashbacks, why are men like thisssss,
it's the middle of the night and i want to rant about my ex, everytime i remember this i go feral,
ONCE UPON A TIME my ex and i were searching for a movie on his laptop, idek how we ended up on fb and i wanted to search for something there so i went to the little fb search bar and when i clicked it a list of his last searches was displayed and the first line was some girl's profile, and i swear i'm not the jealous type.. not in a toxic exaggerated way, i'm pretty chill and i hate confrontation so i don't like to make a big deal out of things, specially when i don't know the whole story
still, like a reflex, my innocent and curious ass asked "who is she?" i didn't even really care tbh it was whatever, BUT you know what he said?... he said NOTHING, he didn't answer me, Liv!
HE OPTED TO IGNORE THE QUESTION, there was no way in hell he didn't hear me, it was dead silence at night, so i stayed calm and waited a couple seconds but he just kept scrolling...
wtf ??
he literally ignored me and then "let's go downstairs and watch netflix on the living room" he said and im like "fine"... shocked
man... i was fuming, i was MAD, sad and making up the worst scenarios in my head... OBVIOUSLY!
like half hour went by and i was just sitting there while he was trying to make conversation but i was gonna make him suffer just like i was,
until he was like "stooop..." very whiny and dumBly trying to hug me, HAHA stay down bitch!
so i went like "stop what?", so cold lmao
then he started explaining that she was just some girl he remembered from church that has his same birthday or something so he looked her up, so stupid
so i went "WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST SAID THATTTT!!!!!!"
God! i wanted to slap him so hard, honestly, he was like "I LITERALLY HAVE NO IDEA, MY MIND WENT BLANK, I DON'T KNOW"
and im like "YOU DON'T FUCKING SAY! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT I WAS THINKING THIS WHOLE TIME, YOU IDIOT????"
of course he started beggin for forgiveness and i sent him to the store to bring me snacks
this is a stupid story bc the whole thing was idiotic and the more i thinkg about it someone else probably wouldn't've believe him but i did bc i know him
he's still my friend and i love him with all my heart but sometimes he's just so stupid!! like... his explanation actually made sense for him!
men...
not comparing my ex to hobi, LOL
but just like... petal, my sweetheart... -i FEEL YOU, those minutes/hours must've been HELL and im sorry but yes... we need time... and snacks
that don't mean we love you any less but the hurting is a bitch and we need to let her have a process
my rant ends here👌🏻
im ready for more angst, liv, keep them coming, i love uuu
Omg Lydia is coming in SWINGING for Petal!!! As you should! Hobi, you didn't mean to hurt your girl but you did :( No but exactly, like even though it was a misunderstanding LITERALLY WHAT ELSE WAS PETAL SUPPOSED TO THINK DURING THAT TIME???? Of course her brain went straight to "he's cheating on me" like ?!
Oh gosh your story about your ex :/ dude. just communicate that from the start!! Like honestly there are some toxic jealous people out there and he was so lucky that you just have a normal, natural amount of jealousy bc someone else would have blown up at him in that moment. Just be honest with your partners!!! Why don't men understand this?! I'm sorry you had to have that awful sick feeling even for a little bit :(
Lol I will definitely keep the angst coming soon! Gotta give Peaches her angsty moments <3
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are you ready? okay: 💜💛💗💪🔊👏👑💚(obviously because you're scottish and i know you guys are hella gorgeous and hella talented, it's really unfair - but it's a trade-off for your fantastic talent so i endure it. xoxo)
i want to make sure you’re happy; i just think you’re cute!; i want to give you a hug!; id fight someone if they talked shit about you; im really glad i started following you!; everything you say is great wtf…; your blog aesthetic is lovely!; im a little jealous of you
(i am jack harkness, diving at you, aka the doctor)
OKAY FIRST OF ALL, shuddup with the lil green heart okay.
SECOND OF ALL, I’m glad we made it through the teen wolf days and now we’re here lmao.
You are wonderfully sarcastic and funny and your talent knows no bounds. Idek how we started following each other in the first place but I’m glad we did.
YA CUTE LORD OF ANGST
ask game: send me emojis
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what are the things you like and dislike about the '97 anime and the films?
ty for asking, i’m just gonna write a few long lists lol
97 anime likes:
the animation, including the like, yk the more detailed stills they pan over in place of action or to punctuate important moments, i love it
the gorgeous backgrounds
most of the colour choices. red eclipse, femto’s blue eyes, casca’s skintone, griffith’s mauve clothes, etc.
how close it is to the manga. like, it’s a solid adaption just by virtue of making very few changes.
so like, most of it really, because i like the manga
special mention to the entire lead up to the eclipse from griffith’s reality break to the sacrifice tho, because i think that was all pretty damn perfect. it’s the most important scene and they did it right.
actually also shout out to casca’s flashback to griffith and the dead kid, gennon, the river scene, all that. another difficult v emotional sequence that they nailed imo.
griffith thinking about how he “loves” guts during the monologue
skipped most of the griffith/charlotte sex scene iirc which i approve of
the glimpse of black swordsman guts in ep 1. it’s not perfect but it’s way better than the ovas starting w/ 15 yr old guts
the opening and closing themes. fucking love both songs ngl
also the opening monologue. never get tired of hearing it
the score
the portrayal of griffith was honestly pretty solid imo. i have very few issues there. and lbr that’s important lol
97 anime dislikes:
not a big fan of griffith or guts’ character designs.
just about everything that isn’t identical to the manga is a change for the worse
turned griffith’s scratch marks into that giant unexplained scar
adding extra scenes where casca is secretly impressed with guts’ skills in battle in an attempt to build up their relationship better, which instead just made casca look unfair for still being a dick to him for 3 years and made guts stupidly gary stu-ish
obviously the straightforwardly romantic portrayal of guts and casca’s relationship
through several seemingly minor changes (eg, skipping guts’ night of self-doubt after he leaves, giving guts’ stay with godo its own half-episode, making guts inviting casca along super romantic rather than the incredibly casual and assholish way he does it in the manga, etc) it makes Guts’ dream seem legitimately noble and worthwhile, with none of the like… implicit critique the manga has. like honestly it completely fucks up what i consider one of the central themes of the story lol
the pre eclipse stuff also fails to sell guts’ sense of regret - through things like playing guts’ theme while judeau is telling guts to leave, not repeating guts’ statement of regret after casca tells him to leave again, the tone remains consistently in favour of guts’ dream. wrong and bad.
like it really reads like the suggested tragedy is that guts doesn’t get the chance to ditch griffith with judeau and take off with casca and the raiders lol
also fucks it up by never directly mentioning guts’ csa trauma
also fucks it up by losing guts’ self-destructive single-minded urge to fight monsters that we saw thru the wyald stuff. i’m not gonna say that losing wyald was a bad decision, but they should’ve at least moved erika suggesting that guts just wants to fight zodd again to the fucking waterfall scene in question, which they portrayed completely sans zodd discussion, completely sans implication of the self-destructiveness of guts’ dream
like in the manga he nearly gets killed by the falling logs and just laughs it off like a dumbass while erika is concerned and suggests that guts is driven by something irrational and not actually a ~noble~ dream, ie, wanting to fight zodd again (ie, going deeper, his csa trauma), while in the anime we get a 2nd scene where he successfully slices through the logs as a super basic symbol of growth and a narrative pat on guts’ back that shouldn’t be there!
honestly just fucking everything about the portrayal of guts’ dream lol it just takes it at face value in a way the manga consistently never did and always undermined and critiqued, and it bugs the hell out of me.
guts is just drawn in a way that makes him look angry way too often and he often feels ooc to me bc of it. like he lacks a lot of the warmth he has in the manga imo
showing that griffith is awake when guts says “i’ll stay too” even tho in the manga those words are placed over a panel of him asleep for a reason like, ffs
lots of other random nitpicky details that only i give a fuck about because my opinions and feelings about the story are too strong lol. like not showing griffith’s face when he asks if guts thinks he’s cruel
oh huge one: moving the scene where the torturer rips off griffith’s behelit from about a day after he was imprisoned to right before his rescue. completely trivializes griffith’s torture because it still looks like he’s been in there for a day at most
why on earth did it end where it ended????????????? who’s bright idea was that? the perfect ending is skull knight riding tf out with guts and casca and femto not killing them, but then they also cut out skull knight’s first appearance so idfk man.
oh some downplaying of griffguts, like i can’t complain too much about this because it was still p homoerotic, but things like omitting guts assuming griffith wants to fuck him right before their first duel. boo.
ultimately at the end of the day as much as i do genuinely like the anime, it’s not telling quite the same story the manga was - the story it’s telling is more boring and basic. but because it sticks so close to the manga the good story still shines through? it just means there’s inconsistent tone choices and stuff, like the aforementioned grievances.
it’s like, they kept casca’s diatribe at guts line for line while she’s screaming that griffith needed him and a man can’t live on dreams alone, but they don’t extend that train of thought to guts going off to pursue his dream, while the manga does.
anyway despite that giant list of dislikes i still think the anime is pretty fantastic overall. i just also like, blame it for a lot of wrong fandom takes lol.
movie likes:
character designs! honestly imo everyone looked pretty great.
they played up the homoeroticism and i appreciate that
illustrating griffith being torn between guts and his dream through that lovely moment when he catches guts when he nearly falls off the stairs right before he catches charlotte, and in a more romantically suggestive way
the whole scene where griffith shows up at charlotte’s window thoroughly improved on the manga, so hats off there. loved how completely out of it he was to the point where he barely realized where he was and immediately turned to leave when charlotte was like ‘woah dude wtf,’ love that charlotte was the one to ask him to stay and then physically move his hand back to her tit, love how emphatically griffith was thinking about guts during that sex scene, etc. like it’s still not perfect, but it is a vast improvement.
griffith showing up in person after the hundred man fight was a nice touch
it was cool that they got a lot of the same english vas from the anime dub back, and they all did a gr8 job. like it’s a pretty good dub imo.
i liked that they moved ‘the crystalization of your last tear shed’ to after guts’ post-eclipse breakdown
compared to the anime at least gtsca was more low-key and chill rather than dramatically romantic. still don’t want it there, and still not as… unromantic as the manga, but i’ll take what i can get
the animation during griffith’s transformation into femto, yk that whole sequence, was cool
slan’s english voice was super sexy
ummmmm i feel like they conveyed the whole dreams are stupid theme, and guts’ decision to leave being a mistake, better than the anime? like i got the sense that the ova ppl recognized that was a theme, at least. i’d have to watch them again to really be sure of that tho
movie dislikes:
GRIFFITH’S. NARRATIVE.
like holy fuck they completely destroyed his character lmao
i cannot believe
no backstory! no tombstone of flame! no ‘do you think i’m cruel?’ THAT WAS THE REASON HE MADE THE SACRIFICE FFS HOW DO YOU SKIP IT????
no dead kid angst, gennon only in vague implication, no self harm - oh no wait we saw self inflicted scratches, they were just completely contextless and meaningless to the point where we could assume charlotte’s nails made them
no torture chamber monologue
no guts monologue in the tavern either for that matter
no rooftop scene
again barely the implication of guts’ childhood trauma, both the sexual abuse and the general parental abuse. one vague flashbacky nightmare doesn’t cut it, it’s the cornerstone of the story
like i get it, it’s a movie trilogy, you have to cut some things, but goddamn, cut out gtsca. trim the hundred man fight. add 20 minutes to the first ova and take the insanely long rape scene out of the third. trim down the whole eclipse sequence. don’t cut out like… the story. like they cut out SO MANY emotionally relevant scenes and kept so many much less relevant scenes, idek.
and like let’s be real here, they turned griffith from an immensely interesting and complex character into a 1 dimensional dude who is torn between a vaguely evil ambition and being in vaguely evil love with guts, just for the sake of streamlining the least interesting aspects of the story
they don’t even try to pretend otherwise lol, look at his fucking hilarious evil smile here
also while i’m looking at it, in general i think they failed at the whole eclipse sequence. looks, lighting, colour, build up of tension… there are a few minor improvements here and there (eg casca’s point of view shot of femto, femto telekinesising guts back a la the black swordsman arc which emphasizes his failure to act when he escapes), but overall it doesn’t work for me at all. like imo the anime has the exact same highs and lows as the manga, but while the ova avoids some lows it never reaches those highs.
they also had griffith overhear guts saying he wants to stay. i really don’t get why this happened twice lol, like… ok his face is kind of shadowed here but he’s still very clearly asleep? this is an important detail, guts’ interrupted words are even on that very panel, so why would you go out of your way to show that he’s awake and listening at that point.
the pacing sucked. 3rd movie was too long, 1st was too short, and they skipped waaaaaay too many significant scenes that should’ve been there as emotional beats
honestly the movies are pretty, they’re nicely fanservicey in ways, they capture some good subtleties and nuances at times, but they’re a husk of the story
oh did i mention the music during the eclipse rape? incredible.
also i am actually generally positive about the movies too despite what it seems like here lmao. i’ve watched them all like, 3 or more times and i find them v enjoyable.
i just have a way easier time listing nitpicky flaws than positives honestly. the flaws stand out to me, the virtues pass me by because i’m just enjoying them and not dwelling on them
and lbr here at the end of the day no adaption will ever really satisfy me unless i somehow find several million dollars lying around and make my own lol. and that would probably be a flop anyway.
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It's a blushing luka. My life is complete
Omg so loveable omg im gg cry hes so shy i cant ????? I feel like i would just scare him off if i were to meet him irl bc im so boisterous (did i spell that correctly LMAO) and loud lol im just like fenrir i think but like the angst version of him, probably
TOTALLY HAHAHA A GOOD DANCER THAT GETS HIS BEST BUDDY FENRIR TO TEACH HIM HOW TO DANCE HAHAHA omg im choking.
HAHAHA IM LITERALLY LAUGHING OUT LOUD LOL OBVIOUSLY RAY IS THE TOP AND FENRIR IS THE BOT LOL OK SORRY EXCUSE ME FOR EVER SAYING THAT HAHAHAH OMFG im ugh omg LOL. ok hahahah anw i love this event omg i dont know if its because i keep pausing but compared to the main story, i feel that each part of the event story is longer ??? mhm ideks but i thoroughly enjoy playing it lol it's like i get to know a bit more about the characters in the otoge that i'd never have known more about if not for the side event. Bc their routes haven't been released yet. So yeah i really appreciate this opportunity to know each of the ikerev men better bc they r all such precious human beans i love them omg sighs
I almost forgotten that fenrir and luka r nobles and im so shook & amazed abt it i mean seriously you never would have expected it at first glance. It's so amazing & fascinating, this story plot.
Omg same, ikerev mc. I feel the same conflict as u do. WHICH IS WHY VS EVENTS R JUST SO HEARTBREAKING BC U DITCH THE OTHER KDOJAIWJWKW OMG
Wtf seth u r so drunk and u always sound like ur on crack but when it boils down to it, ur so serious. AND I LOVE THAT SIDE OF U SO MUCH I JUST CANT. I WANT TO SQUISH U AND FIND OUT ABOUT UR DARKEST SIDES. in fact im so interested to play ur route omg ;; also oliver omg i want to know why oliver shrunk and become this tiny kid so desperately as well omg
I still love the pink in fenrir's hair and eyes lmao he gives me the delinquent vibes aND I'M LOVING IT I TELL U i've never loved rebellious vibes more than ever until i met godspeed
I chose the sweet ending although i could go for ray's premium ending bcs luka LOL I'M JUST REALLY INTERESTED omg /slapped
Same thoughts, same sentiments -- ikerev mc 😒😒😒 i don't think ray deserves this but ok fine omg
LOL YA TOTALLY, MC HHAHAHA WHY U GOTTA BE SO NAIVE HAHAHAHHAHA
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ZOINKS for the ask meme
ty mon cher amie~
ask me: FANDOM EDITION
under the cut because i ended up rambling a lot
Z - Just ramble about something fan-related, go go go
um fan related like… a fan theory? cuz ok. ok. i got this, i love theories. i know it’s a popular theory that maxwell and/or bertrand are involved with the traitor thing and!! as much as i don’t want to believe it… i honestly think the idea has merit (and angst. let us think of the glorious angst.)
like shit i’ve been replaying trr and wtf i’ve just had these doubts in my mind like. why is drake implying that maxwell’s sketchy in chapter 2. why is maxwell so nice to mc even?? is he really that friendly? Is he just desperate? is it an act that became real??? WE BARELY TALKED IN THE INTRO CHAPTER WHY ARE YOU SUDDENLY BRINGING ME TO YOUR PARADISE OF A COUNTRY, BOY
(Idek what i’m saying anymore my brain left the building sometime between 10 am and 1 pm)
O - Choose a song at random, which OTP does it remind you of
what’s it gonna by shura. hmm. i initially associated this song with a ship from another fandom, aka mc/black magic from the heroes rise trilogy, but… maaaybe mc/maxwell?
because the whole “I’m on my own/You’re at the beach/Hundreds of miles away” line reminds me of that scene in the beach party where maxwell’s off on his own while mc swims with hana and drake. (let’s say that the “hundreds of miles” are a metaphorical distance ok)
and the whole song has this whole… ambivalent, torpe kind of longing? where the singer has feelings for someone, but they don’t want to admit their feelings. it’s like they really want to be with this person, but they expect their crush to turn them down (”if you let me down, let me down slow”)
from there it’s easy to imagine maxwell having a crush on mc and not confessing because of the whole ‘sponsoring her’ thing + i believe he’s insecure and doesn’t think mc will actually reciprocate his feelings and/or choose him over liam and/or the other LIs
I - Has tumblr caused you to stop liking any fandoms, if so, which and why
lmao the l.ord of the flies fandom. i got into an argument about how people were portraying this one character as snow white (even though canon has stated his skin to be “swarthy” or dark skinned) because of a popular artist’s depiction of him. and this artist had done that, saying it’s to “differentiate said character from the other small dark skinned boy” which in itself is racist because it’s assuming that all poc look alike
and long story short, the person i was arguing with started spreading shit in the main tags which got everyone’s attention; the fandom was divided about it since they stuck with the white-washed version of the character for so long. and then anons started bullying RPers who chose white face claims… my friends in the fandom were very divided on it, and i just left cuz it was getting toxic so yeah.
N - Your favorite fanfiction or fan author
…lol it’s also you HAHAHA it’s always such a boon to read about your ocs and their antics i love them i love the way you write it’s so poetic and beautiful without becoming purple prose
K - How do you feel about the other people in your current fandom
i love you guys! i admire your creativity and talent and y’all are so interesting!! and i wish i could talk to you more without being so awkward AHHA i’m sorrrrry
S - Show us an example of your personal head canon
maxwell is pansexual, though he rarely has (romantic) crushes that last past a few days.
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tagged by: @julieandem
tagging: @formidablesana @evakshalla @dagfordag if u guys want to
coke or pepsi: coke (katie said pepsi and im never speaking to her again)
disney or dreamworks: disney man wtf
coffee or tea: TEA
books or movies: i’m a lit student so i should probably say books
windows or mac: that’s tough. i have a mac but i use windows on it too lmao bc they’re just better at some stuff. although os is safer i think
dc or marvel: is this like mcu vs dceu or marvel comics vs dc comics tho? doesn’t matter the answer is marvel to both bitch
xbox or playstation: i’m not a gamer so idk hah (i have a ps1 tho i used to play formula 1 on it i was horrible)
dragon age or mass effect: what
night owl or early riser: night owl anD early riser bc i hate myself
cards or chess: i know how to play uno and blackjack
chocolate or vanilla: chocolate
vans or converse: vanS
lavellan, trevelyan, cadash, or adaar: i had to google this
fluff or angst: i’m always a slut for angST
beach or forest: forest probably? idk but beach if im in cyprus bc if it’s a forest in cyprus then there’s pine trees which make me nauseous.
dogs or cats: aggressively dogs
clear skies or rain: rain
cooking or eating out: cooking (hehe eating out hehe) (im a 12 year old)
spicy food or mild food: GIMME ALL THE SPICE
halloween/samhain or solstice/yule/christmas: halloween if i celebrated it but i guess christmas bc presents and food yaknow?
would you rather forever be a little too cold or a little too hot: too cold, heat can suck my ass (this is what katie wrote and i feel like it’s appropriate)
if you could have a superpower, what would it be: mind control (also what katie wrote. again, appropriate bc fuck yes)
animation or live action: live action unless it’s disney.
paragon or renegade: im slowly realising this was made for gamers, and i am not one
baths or showers: showers but for like 50 minutes yaknow?
team cap or team ironman: stop. no. i was aggressively team cap until i watch cacw (like 100 times) stOP HURTING TONY. STOP HURTING BUCKY. JUST STOP.
fantasy or sci-fi: sci-fi owns this ass
do you have three or four favourite quotes? if so, what are they: this is vvv hard and idk so i’ll just give the first one that comes to mind
“the first rule of poetry is honest, the second is fuck you” - alice notley
also the entirety of allen ginsberg’s howl
i also fucked up the numbering. sorry.
youtube or netflix: can’t choose. nope. (youtube IS free tho)
harry potter or percy jackson: harry potter (check that url)
when you feel accomplished: being productive and getting shit done. getting good grades.
star wars or star trek: as my dad puts it “i like star wars but i understand star trek more”.
paperback books or hardback books: this is hard. there’s connotations that come with choosing paperback bc that’s what you call shitty porn books you find at the supermarket. but as a lit student, paperback is cheaper.
horror or rom-com: literally neither oh my god both give me nightmares
to live in a world without literature or music: i have no answer to this atrocity of a question
pastel colours or dark colours: for what? for clothes? dark. for room painting? pastel. for make up? nudes. (send noodz)
tv shows or movies: tv shows bih
city or countryside: city
if any other zodiac sign could describe you, what would it be: idek how libra describes me
if you could only listen to one album for the rest of your life what would it be: fuck this. no idk.
cinema or theatre: theatre
if you could be any fictional character’s best friend, who’d you be: god i feel like all my favorite characters are whiny shits. (again, what katie wrote and i relate) but i guess gansey would be a good best friend or ron weasley
smiling or smirking: i can’t smirk i look like a creep so smiling
are you an ‘all or nothing’ type or are you more consistent: im nothing. that’s it.
playlists or your whole library on shuffle: playlists
traveling or staying at home: traveling although what i do is stay home and use that google maps view thing. i once did for the town im living in right now instead of actually going outside. (it was for actual reasons im not that sad, but it’s really funny without context)
if you could have a meal with three people, alive and dead, who would you choose: oh shit. michael jackson, audrey hepburn and malcolm x
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