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qiutls · 10 months

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TNGDH 012

After the two fought, the miracle value rose to 8%, perhaps because I changed the course of the original plot.

This is quite expensive for just one performance of painting. Although, because of this act Kyle called for a veterinarian the day after.

'Your magical beast is quite cute, Your Highness....'

There was one problem, the doctor that came seemed to know nothing about magical beasts and could only say the sentence above.

But it was to be expected, how could a doctor who only examines rodents have any idea on what's wrong with a magical beast. I think it's even more amazing that there are veterinarians in this world.

'Was my acting too real...'

At this rate, if I really sneeze, the whole castle of Blake might be sent into a frenzy. The future of the North is bleak...

Kyle seemed to not want to leave my side, yet he didn't have a choice since it was a busy time and he needed to look over the preparations. It's not easy to be in charge of a territory. Still, seeing that the affairs are being finalized, he seems to be pretty good at his job as a lord.

Eventually he left the study to check the dinner preparation during the afternoon. He looked quite commendable today, so I'll let him kiss up to 5 times.

Thanks to him being busy, I also have some free time. As soon as I confirmed that he has moved far away from the study, I quickly used the skill and became human.

[ Good luck! (ෆ`꒳´ෆ) ]

"So you're saying your name is... Shu?"

I'm doomed.

I'm tired of saying 'I'm doomed', but I have no other words for this situation.

Right now, I'm roughly dressed in different pieces of clothing which I found in other laundry rooms along the path from the maid's laundry. I managed to find an attendant's uniform.

And although it didn't fit, I was lucky to find leather boots clean shirts and pants.

Thanks to the nice situation, I felt a little elated thinking my luck has finally turned around, that is until I ran into Sen at the hallway.

"Well, yes, I guess-"

Sen frowned as I spoke indifferently.

"Where in the world would you find someone who says, 'I guess' when asked about their name."

Where you ask? It's here in this world. Since you wouldn't believe that my name is 'Cashew Nut,' I could only say 'Shu.'

I don't have any other name prepared, if I said my real name which probably doesn't exist in this world, you would think I'm strange.

So, I could only say that my name is 'Shu'. It's taken from Cashew Nut, although it's not a good name, I took it from the name the Grand Duke sincerely bestowed upon me.

The quick-witted Sen immediately recognized that I was wearing someone else's clothes. It's because of this shirt that's suspiciously large on my frame.

"Did you steal these clothes? Are you perhaps the infamous, companionship pervert-"

"I'm not!"

Of course, it's me, but I can't admit it!

What do you mean companionship pervert, I'm just a companion okay? When I shouted in reply, Sen grumbled and said,

"If it's not you, then why are you yelling?"

Luckily, she was as kind as she was clever. Instead of accusing me, she decided to listen to my explanation.

Thanks to this, I was forced to come up with a sob story of my past on the spot. I stammered and told her how my family was killed by demonic beasts when I was young and how I had nothing to wear now since I outgrew my old clothes. I also told her I couldn't remember the name my family gave me, so I gave a name to myself, thinking it was an appropriate name for me.

..... Come to think of it. It was not far from the truth, when I was young, my parents did indeed die, due to a car accident. And I was poor and unable to buy clothes.

"I see. It is indeed common for refugees to enter the estate or the castle during the festival. That's why His Highness prepares a lot of food during this period. A lot of orphans like you stumble around here."

Sen looked at me with a complex expression and said,

"I also lost my family, so I came here all the way to the North, just like you, I don't have anyone left."

She seemed to have felt sorry for me.

After our conversation, Sen disappeared for a while then brought back a few clothes. She said it was clothes usually worn by servants. It was simple and clean, and it was easy to move my body wearing it.

Thanks to Sen, my situation actually became better, so I gave the stolen clothes back to her.

"Shu, it seems that we are hiring more servants because there's not enough workers in the castle these days. Why don't you apply? You can stay at the castle, and you won't have to steal clothes like this anymore."

"I won't steal. Really, please believe me. I'm also embarrassed by my actions."

I can't believe I have to look for a job here as well. It's really hard to make ends meet. Everything was free when I was just a hamster. Ah, maybe because I paid it with my human rights.

I asked in a faint voice.

"But there's going to be an interview, right?"

"Of course, they don't just blindly pick. And working here in the castle is much more sought out than you think!"

"Is that so? How many rounds will the application process have?"

Sen looked at me blankly as if I asked a weird question.

"Hmm? How many what?"

"It's nothing..."

That's right, this isn't even a company. There might not be enough spots as well, so I need to do my best to get picked.

After that, I stuck with Sen as she gave me a tour of the castle. I earnestly memorized the layout of the Blake Castle and at the same time, eavesdropped on servants passing by in case I hear any rumors, I learned the way to the study, I found out about a passageway used by servants only, and discovered rooms that were not being used.

Thanks to this, I also found a good place to hide my clothes. It was the most fulfilling 30 minutes I've spent since I've transmigrated.

"Can I leave you for a bit? I need to give these documents to His Highness, he asked to strengthen the security, so I made a new timetable for the soldiers patrolling."

"Oh that, His Highness said he was going to return to the study, he must almost be there by now, it's fine we can take our time."

W-what? His Highness is returning to the study? Already?!

I stood stiffly on the spot.

It hasn't even been long after 30 minutes as a human, this plan is ruined again. If this continues, it's easier to count the moments in life that's not ruined.

"So that's everything about the East Tower, now let's look at the Central Area where the banquet hall is found... Huh? Shu! Where are you going?!"

"Sorry, I forgot about something I needed to do! I'll look around the banquet hall next time!"

Right now, the problem isn't that I can't look around the banquet hall. If I'm not back in the hamster house in 3 seconds I'm afraid the Blake castle will be turned inside out again.

I quickly stuffed my clothes in the unused storage room and closed it from the inside. I need to hurry and go back and pretend like nothings amiss...

As soon as the white light wrapped around my body, I suddenly felt uneasy. I had an instinctive intuition that I shouldn't release the skill without thinking.

'Hey system, can I specify a location inside the hamster house?'

[ Of course! ]

'Then... please put me in the most out of sight. Where was it again? The place where I piled up the sawdust to make the ground soft? It's around the corner of the first floor.'

The white light slowly wrapped around my body again and as it flashed the surroundings turned brown. It seems I arrived safely as expected...

Then someone suddenly grabbed my body.

― Squeak! [ What the?! ]

"Cashew Nut."

His voice was several times lower than usual. Even when Belial was here, I don't think his voice sounded this gloomy.

Kyle's eyes fell on me, and my body trembled reflexively. H-hey! Wait a minute, what's wrong with you? Let's talk, just t-talk it out. Of course, you don't understand what I'm saying but-

'.... Why does it feel like your eyes are a bit off.'

No, not just a bit, I meant a lot.

"I thought you disappeared."

I did disappear, but I was going to come back, it's just you came back before me!

I rolled my eyes and glanced at his hands, the tendons on his wrists, turned black and blue, as if he was preventing himself from exerting too much force on his hands.

Seeing the sawdust stuck between his fingers, he must've been searching the floor of the house when he saw I wasn't at the usual spot with the feeding bowl and toys.

Thump. Thump.

A heartbeat that seemed quite fast could be felt from the palm of his hand.

Why are you so nervous. I'm just a magical beast found in the wild. If you act like this, people will think you love me more than you love your own life.

"Cashew Nut, please don't scare me like that again."

I heard him sigh.

Kyle looked at me with complicated eyes and gently stroked my head. His hand that was holding me was shaking, yet the hand that swept through my fur was so gentle and stable.

"Am I ridiculous for liking you this much? I don't know if the rest of the world thinks like Belial. But from the first moment I held you in my hands, I was determined to give you all the love I have. Isn't it natural to cherish you with all my might since I decided that you'll be my companion."

Why are you speaking such touching words.

I stopped twisting in his grasp and stretched out my paw to touch his palm.

'You really must've been worried.'

That's right, I suddenly disappeared just a few days ago while you were washing up. For me, I was just turning into human to look around the castle, but for you it must have been shocking to find that I've gone.

I felt sorry towards Kyle. But I can't help it, I need to go out... Okay then, I'll adjust my schedule, how about going out when you're sleeping? Alright, let's do it like that.

Kyle put his lips briefly on my forehead and said affectionately.

"I want to make you the happiest magical beast in the whole world."

What a commendable remark. It's this hamster's luck to be picked by you. It's indeed convenient to live when your owner is a kind human.

"And if ever someone kidnaps you, he will not have the luxury of being buried in one place."

I take back what I said about you being kind. This owner is a bit strange. Please, don't be to obsessed with hamsters!

"Tomorrow afternoon, the vet will come again to examine you, Cashew Nut. It still bothers me that you fainted out of nowhere. Maybe you're too skinny.... I'll bring you a lot of special snacks tomorrow morning. For now, here, Sen brought you a beef snack."

Wow! Beef... Alright I'll let you slide even if you're too overbearing. Korean beef.... Ah, there's no Korean beef here. Northern beef, come to me~

By the way, you make me eat until I'm full every breakfast, lunch and dinner, but you think I'm skinny? Just because you can hold me with one hand doesn't mean I'm skinny!

Back in my old world, I was originally a glutton. I ate a lot and ate more freely once I got here. I guess I brought that habit with me here.

'Is the hamster constitution, the same as human constitution?'

Of course I don't know, I've never lived as a hamster before. Excuse me, does anyone know what's the average weight for a hamster?

"But it's alright, since you're still cute."

To Kyle, I seemed to be the definition of the most perfect specimen in this whole universe.

'This hamster otaku.....'

Hmph, still I felt a bit happy today, so I'll let it slide and call you a kind owner.

T/N:

everyone tysm for the notes and follow! it's really nice to see the number of readers grow! also please don't forget to support the author by buying the raws! it's linked at the novel masterpage :)

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#tngdh

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cometcon · 7 months

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I did it. I wrote fanfic for Helluva Boss. It's consuming my mind. XD

So I was looking through the Striker tag on here for more of my favourite bastard snakey boi and found this really neat artwork. :D

And it's a really interesting concept and the artwork is so well done and they've kept just enough of Striker's sinister energy in the images that my brain just wouldn't leave me alone about it. And it got me thinking: Redeemed Striker cuddling up to Moxxie for warmth is definitely cute and even I love it (and I'm aromantic as fuck XD ). But would it be possible to write something with the same basic concept, just making it a different scenario to involve my first impression of Striker instead, without having to redeem and develop Striker first? Can I have my cake and eat it too? XD

I've changed my mind since I first posted this so here's the freshly edited new introductory waffle:

I want to flesh this out a little and write it as a whole oneshot partnered with my Blitz/Striker fic which is also set during Harvest Moon and maybe ending along the lines of the events in the canon episode, but in the meantime my brain churned out about 800 words for the specific prompt. I think I'm leaning for the fic being about Moxxie's perspective of Striker arriving at the farm. Moxxie dislikes him immediately and since Striker is an egotistical supremacist piece of shit he just doubles down on the dickwad behaviour, but keeps it subtle enough for Blitz and Millie to do their usual thing of overlooking Moxxie's concerns about things they don't see as a problem/threat/red flag (I promise I'm not hating on them; I love their characters but also sometimes it does seem like a fair bit of the shit Moxxie gets dragged into could have been avoided if they'd listened to him. XD Though then we wouldn't have the show so again, not complaining, just playing with it. Don't kill me lol.) And Moxxie understandably gets sick of Striker's shit and they begin a tit for tat resulting in Moxxie shooting Striker's window 'by accident' and then 'forgetting' to fix it. XD And since they're all sleeping in the farm house, Striker chooses to escalate with a cruel and unusual punishment...

Behold, my first ever attempt at dark fluff. XD

----------------------------------

The sound of the door opening and soft light spilling across the room made Moxxie's eyelids flicker, a low growl of annoyance building in his chest.

Millie had a bad habit of laughing off their boss' infuriating behaviour, finding it amusing. Cute, even. Moxxie vehemently disagreed, yet his complaints typically fell on deaf ears, so he usually just endured. But these night-time visits were reaching the absolute line and Moxxie had had enough. He didn't care what his wife said, he was going to fucking murder Blitz if he took even one more step toward-

His back tensed in surprise as the covers lifted, the mattress behind him sinking beneath Blitz's weight. The night had finally come. He'd suspected his boss would escalate, but the fact it was really happening took its sweet time trickling through his outraged mind. Moxxie's vicious attempt to slam his elbow into the licentious imp's gut was too slow and easily thwarted as a large hand latched onto his arm, halting its trajectory.

"Blitz, I swear to fucking Satan, I will claw your eyes out of your skull and feed them to Luna! Get off me," he hissed quietly, hoping not to wake his snoring wife. She might just tell him to move over and give Blitz more space before falling asleep again anyway.

Before he could do much else however, a long, clammy, lithe body that was decidedly not Blitz pressed into him, strong arms wrapping around his much smaller form and pulling him closer. His heartbeat accelerated and a bolt of fear shot down his spine.

"Shouldn't make threats you can't follow up on, rodent."

Striker's breath wafted over Moxxie's ear in a gentle caress. He shuddered, tugging uselessly at the unyielding grip trapping him against the assassin as he felt Striker curl further, moulding himself into every part of Moxxie he could reach. Moxxie's tail twitched, caught between them and unable to find a gap to escape.

"What the fuck?"

It should have been a shout, but his throat was tense with fright, the words emerging in an embarrassingly pathetic whimper. One hand searched for Millie, desperately praying he could wake her before they were both slaughtered in their sleep.

"Quit wriggling," Striker rumbled, fingers lacing through Moxxie's to draw the hand back into his chest.

"Why are you in here? Get out."

Moxxie still couldn't manage more than a choked whisper, but the fact there seemed to be no intention of actually harming him allowed a rising indignation to take fear's place. He tried kicking, though that only served to annoy Striker, who immediately enveloped the flailing legs between his own. It was like being stuck in a patch of quicksand; the more Moxxie struggled, the deeper he sank.

"Someone hasn't fixed the wall in my room yet. It's cold."

That long, spiked tail snaked across Moxxie's shivering skin, coiling around their tangled limbs and draping itself over his abdomen. The quiet rattle as the tip continued upward and settled by his face sent a chill through him and he squeezed his eyes shut.

"That doesn't mean you get to- mmph!"

His final, barely audible attempt at protest was swiftly cut off by Striker's free hand covering his mouth.

"Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh," came the deceptively soft admonishment, arms and tail constricting in a painful warning. Moxxie groaned and went limp, hoping it would be enough to appease, the understanding he really was at his captor's mercy sinking to the base of his stomach like a concrete brick on the ocean floor. Striker chuckled and thankfully granted him the ability to draw breath after a moment, though he remained tightly entwined with the trembling little body in his clutches, chin resting in mock affection atop Moxxie's head as he murmured, "Good boy. Go back to sleep."

This was just another one of Striker's games, he told himself. If he stayed very still and didn't cause a fuss, his tormentor would get bored and leave.

Any minute now.

The dark outline of Millie's senseless form under the blanket was silhouetted against the window, her peaceful snores the only sound stirring the atmosphere. Striker's breathing had slowed too, apparently content to stay snuggled against him, leaching his warmth and sanity alike.

Well, fuck.

When several minutes had passed without any further threat, Moxxie forced himself to relax. There was nothing he could do anyway. If Striker wanted him dead he would be already. Staying alert all night would play right into the other's aims, showing him the intimidation tactics were working the second he saw his victim's tired eyes and frazzled demeanour the next morning.

Moxxie refused to let him win that easily.

He listened for Millie, his breaths steadying as he timed them to match hers and held the image of her beautiful beaming grin in his mind. Striker was bound to slip up eventually and when he did, Moxxie would be prepared for him. A new thought of slicing the trecherous demon's throat with his own knife flashed through Moxxie's head and he smiled, playing it slowly on loop until he managed to drift off again.

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cyberneticlagomorph · 10 months

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Gnomish country is... different to say the least.

You feel like a giant stomping through the diligently maintained paths and cobblestone (p... pebblestone??) streets.

The road to the Gnomish Embassy is wide at least... or wide for a gnome. Its the size of a city sidewalk at best, no Tallfolk vehicles allowed for safety, though they assured you that mobility aids such as wheelchairs don't count as vehicles and are fine so long as they get a heads up first.

Gnome country is like... if all those movies about sapient mice living parallel but nearly identical lives to their human counterparts in the walls and floors of their human's homes had a baby with zootopia and let it be raised by some steampunk Dwarven madman.

Most of Gnome Country is underground, tucked away in burrows and tree hollows and the tangled arms of plant roots, and while you are perfectly willing to make yourself small enough to fit the Gnomes insisted that you meet the Queen on Tallfolk terms.

The Gnomish Embassy is inside a fairly large hawthorn tree with a natural hollow at its base that has been converted into a number of human sized rooms with human sized furniture. It's kinda cute to watch the gnomes bustle around, scampering on all four limbs like mice, the points of their caps bobbing along.

...you wonder if it's racist to call them cute.

You are led to a plain room with wooden furniture carved with impossibly tiny scenes and a multitude of little ladders and ledges for the gnomes to use.

In a plush armchair across the room is a woman all dressed in black armor. Thorns sprout from her neck like spikes on a collar, her skin is milk white and shiny like porcelain.

No... not LIKE porcelain, it is porcelain. You can see the thin seams along her jaw that allow for complex articulation. Her body is ball jointed elsewhere, made of some kind of polished black metal that gleams red in the right lighting.

Her eyes are the all encompassing dark only found rodents, her delicate fingers end in sharp red claws, and her tail lays coiled in her lap like a snake. Rootlike and branching, each tip ends in a blooming rose or a tightly closed bud, its length is spangled with thorns of every size, mirroring the ones growing from her neck and shoulders.

The queen has no hair, not even a wig or a pointed cap like her subordinates, just complex swirling roses comprised of Gnomish text written in blood red ink on her bare head.

"Sit." Her voice echoes, and you realize that the room is shaped in such a way that sounds carry better. Like an opera house or a theater.

You sit, carefully and curl your own tail into your lap.

The gnome queen blinks the way puppets and dolls blink, it makes you uneasy.

You open your own mouth to speak but are silenced by a cold look, the porcelain plates of the queen's face grinding together as they move almost as smooth as flesh.

Almost.

Your discomfort must have shown on your face because she smiles then, just a little, and it is a terrible smile.

"Does this form displease you, dear princeling?"

#ic #action post

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firstginger · 2 years

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Hello!

Firstly I just wanted to tell you I love the daemon quiz and it's been awesome sending it to all the people in my dnd group to see what they get. I sent them the pokemon quiz a while back and that was a blast too.

Secondly, i was wondering if I could mabey get some form suggestions? If you still do them, if not that's totally fine no worries :)

I'm in a bit of an odd pickle. I'm an INFP, I bond closely with small groups of people and (the pickle part) I protect them FEROCIOUSLY. I lack the classic infp avoidance and passivity due to some very rough life experiences. Because of this a lot of infp forms don't really seem to fit, but I'm not quite sure what to do about it otherwise. If it helps at all, I'm chaotic good with a 548 tritype. any suggestions your willing to give would be amazing. Thank you so much again for sharing your work through your quizzes!

ahh thank you so much for the compliment, i love hearing what friend groups and families get! :) i'm just a sucker for imagining my friends vibing with their daemons...

oh a great question! a lot of INFP forms do tend to get delegated to the dreamy poet stereotype (rabbits, doves, etc), when honestly INFPs with their Fi leading the way are some of the most ride-or-die friends there are. they have such a strong, deep sense of self that i think a lot of interpretations tend to focus on their desire to achieve inner harmony -- but this is not necessarily at the expense of retreating entirely from external stimuli. Fi is an internal process, but it's wrong to think that it's not equally as involved in upholding an INFP's principles (you are acting in an egregious way by hurting my friends so i will tell you off) as it is creating them (these are my values and i surround myself in people who respect and agree with those values). so in summary i would definitely expect an INFP 5 to be curious and selectively sensation-seeking, as well as stubborn and protective... particularly detached from the imaginative INFP stereotype because what if it's wrong, what if it's purposeless, what if it's not productive.

i'm wondering if some wild canids or scavengers might be a good fit for you. jackals and coyotes seem a little too harmonious, so my first thought was something along the lines of the new guinea singing dog, which TDF has a beautiful write-up on here. they're internal and standoffish people who view new people with a wary eye, though are incredibly protective over their own space, friends, and ideas. i think they may lean into a sort of paranoia about loss: i can see an 8 tritype come through with their sense of confident and competitiveness, combined with a need to be in charge of themselves and avoid control. i think they also pair a chaotic nature with the more "lawful" stereotype of the 5 together well. they're active, curious, and opportunistic, but also closed-off, watchful, and possessive. they are Fi: self-focused and willing to move on from situations and people who aren't good for them, but dutiful towards the people and things to which they have made a conscious commitment.

chaos, introversion, and possessiveness also reminds me of rodents! what's pretty cool is that porcupines are a pretty varied group: old and new world porcupines are actually pretty distantly related and are an example of convergent evolution! their spines are completely different; the new world porcupines have the characteristic barbs, while the old world don't. anyway, i think a species of socially tolerant porcupine might fit, like the brazilian porcupine which lives in small tight-knit groups and has an almost entirely arboreal lifestyle. they're generally easy-going and keep to themselves, confident enough to be independent when needed, but also fiercely self-assured and protective when need be. they're also known to greet and say goodbye to other porcupines in their group which i think is just a cute fact. old world porcupines tend to be more socially tolerant; the crested porcupine is tight-bonding and loyal, but also highly defensive when pushed. they're adaptable and open-minded, if not quite stubborn -- they also have the most delightful sense of curiosity, and are known to collect bones and bring them back to their dens. the indian crested also seems worth looking into, or if you enjoy unique animals, the brush-tailed porcupine is an option. they're fairly social and generous, protective and resilient, inventive but habitual. if you're not vibing with porcupines at all, other rodents you might consider are the cape ground squirrel (very devoted to friends/family, routine-oriented and diligent, like to stay busy and be competitive, protective and fierce when their loved ones are threatened... but might be too social for you), the muskrat (introverted but socially tolerant, generally non-confrontational and keeps to themselves but very assertive when pushed, judgmental and habitual, impulsive when following their heart, perfectionists and hate being wrong, though not at all group-oriented or dependent on others), or especially the maned rat (has a strong sense of self but is also tightly bonded to loved ones, protective and observant of their loved ones' feelings, curious but habitual, emotional and emotive but not necessarily talkative, private but aggressive when bothered).

and finally i'll tentatively suggest the mediterranean water shrew. they're a socially tolerant shrew species that lives near bodies of water. like all shrews, the mediterranean water shrew is a highly particular individual who tends to take a while before they accept new people into their inner circle, but once they do they're agreeable "us vs them" sorts of friends. they're rather possessive of their sense of security and suspicious about others, they may just be more curmudgeonly than actually hostile or judgmental -- however they certainly are competitive and distinct. i would generally categorize them as INTPs just due to how they're not particularly altruistic which might not work for you. they value self-sufficiency and drive, and they tend to not get involved in other people's business. the eurasian water shrew has a bit more bite -- more confident and domineering and hierarchical.

hope this helps! :)

#personal #daemonism #form finding #hdm

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normal-thoughts-official · 2 years

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Top five animals

Oh god how the hell am I supposed to pick between animals. They are all so great and important and I love so many of them for so many different reasons

Okay, I'll give this a shot. I'm sorry other animals

5. Tigers

I used to be obsessed with tigers as a kid, and I do mean obsessed. I had a little binder covered in tiger pics that I'd fill with other tiger pics and articles on tigers and basically anything else I could find on tingers. They aren't particularly unique creatures biology-wise but goddamn if I didn't love those bastards. They are so unique and cool. The hype has died down tho and nowadays I barely remember any tiger facts, but I still see a tiger and go omg look a tiger!!!! The fondness is definitely there so they deserve to be on this list

4. Capybaras

Or as I like to call them

ID: An YouTube video titled "We Found Giant Hamsters On The Streets Of Brazil". The thumbnail is a picture of a capybara on the sidewalk, with a huge red arrow pointing to it and saying, "what is that?". Capybaras are about a human knee's tall rodents with dense brown fur. End ID

There is nothing not to like about capybaras. They are the world's largest living rodent, which is an absolutely crazy thing to be. "Mom I want to be the world's largest rodent!" Timmy what's wrong with you. Yet there they are

And like you'd expect the world's largest rodent to be some kind of Australian nightmare, like a Godzilla rat that eats cables and wrecks the city or whatever, but they are such chill animals. In my uni there is a large river that runs along campus and there are always capybaras just chilling there. One of my friends even petted one of them. I don't think I've ever even seen one of them moving at all. Ideal life

Like look at these guys

ID: Close-up of a capybara's face. They are staring ahead of them. Their head is rectangular and they have very small features, with two nostrils, a tiny mouth, and small eyes that seem narrowed. Their expression is blank. End ID

They said 🗿 [moai emoji]

But also they're so cute

ID: A capybara with two baby capybaras. The baby capybaras look exactly like the adult capybara, except instead of being barrel-shaped, their body is almost perfectly round. End ID

I once saw a capy with three babies and one of them was just on the top of the adult capy's head. Both of them were just chilling, everyone completely immobile. Love those guys. I literally live in The Country Of Capys and I see them all the time and they never get any less amazing. 100000/10 another amazing South American creation

Even their names are cute! Capybara is cute, and presumably comes from Capivara which is the Brazilian word for them. And in Spanish they're called carpincho!! Adorable. Presumably all names in other languages come from these since capys are native only to South America. In short I love them

Bonus: they have a bird guy. Izzy, why don't we have a bird guy?

ID: A capybara, looking exceptionally bored, with a screaming bird resting on top of their head. End ID

Stan capys

3. Eels

Look. At. These. Guys

ID: Four close-ups of eels' faces. They are large snake-like sea creatures with round eyes on either side of their head and a large mouth that's usually open. When seen from the side, their open mouths and unfocused eyes make them look as if they are confused. When seen from the front, their extremely large and round eyes, thin face and open mouth make them look completely shocked. End ID

They look so stupid ❤️

They can also be extremely colorful and beautiful but mostly I just love how dumb they look. Also they are like snakes except from the sea which makes them a billion times cooler. Also I remember going to a talk on them once where they mentioned that eels are some of the most feared creatures for deep divers because they tend to attack their oxygen tubes thinking they are other eels, which can break the tube and lead to uh, unfortunate results. R.I.P those divers but that's so funny

I also have a sorta soft spot for them because when I was a kid I went to the TAMAR project which is a project in Brazil dedicated to sealife conservation, particularly turtles but not just. And they had a gift shop with an eel plushie and I fell in love with that lil guy. Unfortunately it was too expensive as gift shops usually are so I didn't get one but To This Day I think about it. I never found it again either. Eel plushie wherever you are I still love you

2. Planarians

Those bitches are literally called Flat Fucks in scientific lingo so you know they are an absolute hit. And look. At. Them!

ID: A planarian. They are a small tube-shaped but extremely flat creature with no limbs. Their head is slightly triangular with two small and extremely close to each other eyes on top of their head, facing up. They are sand-colored with a grainy brown pattern. End ID

This is what a friend looks like. No, scratch that, this is what happiness looks like. These dudes are happiness incarnate and I'd do anything for them, especially the Tricladidas

"Wah wah but some of them are parasites" good for them! Get that food dearies. I love you

And also they are so cool like they can regenerate no matter what you do to them and they can be found pretty much anywhere except on air! You've got terrestrial planarians, sea planarians, planarians inside the intestines of like every animal that possess one. They are such a successful group and they do nothing except be FLAT FUCKS with VERY TINY EYES ["flat fucks" with "very tiny eyes", in caps]. Fucking iconic

I unfortunately can never find out the name of this particular species that has the triangular head and stuff, there are other planarians that are different. However I will also give a shoutout to them (and other flatworms) because they are very beautiful and colorful and I stan them also.

ID: Three sea flatworms. The first one looks like a slug, with most of their body being neon green with a thin black stripe right on the middle. Around their body they have what looks like a full-body flap in black with neon orange edges. They also have two antennae-looking orange appendages on their head.

The second one also looks like a slug but they are flatter, with a black body with neon pink edges, and two triangle-shaped appendages on top of their head that are orange

The third one has the thinnest body of them all, paper-thin, and their whole body looks maleable and foldable. They are sand-colored with thin black oval patterns, one inside the other, and white edges. End ID

But they are still not as funny as the first guy. Sorry, love you, keep on rockin', but that one right there is my fave

(PS: Although they look like them, those are not sea slugs! Sea slugs are mollusks and these guys are flatworms, or Platyhelminthes. Isn't that cool? I love that. Completely different phyllums and they look almost the same)

1. Trilobites

Can I pick an extinct animal? You never specified so I will. Hehe look at them

ID: A trilobite fossil. They are oval-shaped animals with their body divided in several thin stripes that go up and down three times in a circular shape. End ID

I have always loved them and I will always love them and I have no reason for it. Just. Look at them! They bring me so much joy. They look like a stim toy or a foot self-massager or something. Unparalleled character design. And they could get so huge! Up to 72cm long which is longer than a capybara is tall. They are also flat fucks so maybe I have a thing for them. But that is the coolest exoeskeleton design ever and I'm so sad that they were extinct. They were doing so well! They dominated the seas for quite some time. IDK what happened to them but R.I.P trilobites, always in my heart

And that ends this post! Sorry it's so much longer than you probably expected. If anyone wants more rambling, feel free to ask me for my top 5 anything

#this got long sorry #long post #animals #capybaras #flatworms #planarians #since i talk in quite a bit of length about them #described #ask #mauvecatfic #ask game

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rpmemesbyarat · 3 years

Conversation

RP Meme from Oliver & Company

Now, it's always once upon a time in New York City.

It's a big old bad old tough old town.

Let me have one, please.

Right away, you're making time and making friends

If they pick you out, you're on your way.

Get out there and go and try.

Why does nightfall find you feelin' so alone?

Dreaming is still how the strong survive

Keep your dream alive.

Got to look out and open your eyes,

You're in the fast lane

What's the matter with you? I said get outta here.

I don't eat cats. It's too much fur.

I've been watching you, and I think you're in serious need of some professional guidance.

I'm an expert at these things.

All you gotta do is learn some moves.

This city's got a beat.

When are we gonna get those hot dogs?

I hate to break it to ya, but the dynamic duo is now the dynamic uno.

Our partnership is herewith dissolved.

You're not being fair!

Fairs are for tourists, kid.

Consider it a free lesson in street savoir faire

Hey, wait! I helped you get those! Half of those are mine!

Why should I worry? Why should I care?

I got street savoir faire

You can wear the crown!

Everything goes.

Everything fits.

They love me at the Chelsea, they adore me at the Ritz!

Stop that racket! I'm trying to watch this show.

Shut up, you little rodent.

Come on, let's watch some boxing. I wanna see some action

You think this place is big enough?

What we need is some good quality stuff

Oh, shredded leather.

You insulted my pride! That means death!

It was your turn to get the food today!

You remain our preeminent benefactor.

It was tough. Only I could have done it.

I love a story with food in it.

Enter the opposition.

Gang war! Gang war! Watch out! Here comes a gang war!

Take cover!

It's just a cat.

I followed this dog.

He's lying! He's lying! He's lying! He's lying!

Oh, boy! Dog pile!

Don't let me down!

What do you got?

Let's see what you got.

I was just on my way out.

Actually, I've got something much better than money.

Some luxury items that should make a considerable dent in my debt to you.

Oh, my! You waxed your car, didn't you? Did they use the buffer on it, because I can see myself.

I don't think you grasp the severity of the situation.

Now, I lent you money and I don't see it.

People like you get hurt.

I can't figure out why you'd rather hang around a dump like this when you could be living uptown with a class act like myself.

Isn't it rather dangerous to use one's entire vocabulary in a single sentence?

You bad, man.

Hey, you got something to say to me, fat boy?

Why don't you pick on someone your own size?

Oh, I'm having a bad day!

I like cats. I like to eat 'em.

Your master's calling.

Come on and say it to my face!

How am I ever gonna come up with all that money?

It's hopeless.

That took a lot of guts.

All right. Time for bed. We've got a big day tomorrow.

We've got two days to do or die.

You got a lot to learn. And if you don't learn, you don't eat!

But if you're tough, and always use your head, you'll be right at home, on the street.

When you got talent, everything is free.

You're gonna see how the best survive.

These are streets of gold.

You'll take the town, and you'll take it with style.

You're in charge of electronics.

Hey, but what about me? What do I do?

Ready? Go!

What have I done? Poor thing.

You oughta be ashamed of yourself!

Run along, little fellow. Go on, now. Shoo.

Be a lookout.

I only got one more wire, okay?

Oh, you poor kitty. Here. Let me help you.

Where's the kid?

We can't just take in a stray off the street.

Don't worry, kitty. I'll take care of you.

Your public awaits.

Girl, we've got work to do

Pass me the paint and glue.

Perfect isn't easy

When one knows the world is watching, one does what one must.

See how the breeding shows

Sometimes it's too much for even me!

But when all the world says "Yes", then, who am I to say "no"?

Don't ask a mutt to strut like a showgirl

Perfection becomes me, ne c'est pas?

I'm beauty unleashed!

So classic and classy

They're barking up the wrong tree!

I have your hearts, and you have my pity

Pretty is nice, but still it's just pretty!

I wouldn't go in there if I were you.

What is the meaning of this?

I guess I'll have to handle this myself.

And do you have any idea whose home this is?

Isn't he cute?

What in Heaven's name are we waiting for?

Alas, our beleaguered benefactor bearing the brunt of our futile endeavours.

Cool it!

Our mission begins at daybreak.

I don't hear any practicing.

Oh, you wanna practice too!

We two can be good company.

You and me, just wait and see.

I'll handle that ruffian.

Body slam! Body slam! Oh, come on, you fool! Hit him! Hit him!

Come back here!

Huh, this place looks pretty nice. I mean, how bad off could it be here?

Chagall. Matisse. These are all masterpieces.

Hey, man, if this is torture, chain me to the wall.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Calm down.

Don't come any closer! I knew this would happen one day.

It's not you I'm after.

Not good enough for you?

I mean, do you even know who I am?

GET AWAY FROM ME, YOU LITTLE BUG-EYED CREEP!

Something's not quite right here.

Shh. Quick. Before he comes back. Follow me.

I mean, let's just forget the whole thing.

No, no, you can't do that! You don't understand. The poor dear's so traumatized.

What is going on here?

Hurry. Use the fire escape.

Ooh, I could've danced all night! I could've danced all night!

You were very good.

I was rather good, wasn't I?

You okay, kid?

I have another home now. And someone who loves me.

You're in the gang.

I just wanna go back.

You wanna leave? Fine! There's the door.

You lighten up!

Oh, it's hopeless.

Looks like you're doing all right for yourself

So that's where you've been!

Feel it. That's it. Very good.

This is an airtight plan

I'll even toss in a little extra for your patience.

It's my final offer. Take it or leave it.

I said, push!

No, you don't kill 'im yet.

Did we bring something green and wrinkly to make me happy?

I'm getting your money tonight! It's coming tonight!

Hey, I think there's hope for you yet.

Yeah, you're starting to think big.

It's creepy down here.

I drew a perfectly good map.

A child could read that map.

I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I was framed!

This is a tough neighborhood. You'd better go home.

I came to find my kitty.

You brought a piggy bank.

What kind of a person would steal a poor little kitty?

I'm so scared. I don't know what to do.

I found a little lost kitten.

No! No, wait! You can't do this!

Keep your mouth shut.

Stop! Stop! Time out!

There's gotta be some way in.

Peasants.

Well, it's nice to see that one of you has some manners.

After you, my little croissant

And remember, quiet.

Oh! I broke a nail.

Oh, balderdash.

Freeze!

I don't think you really appreciate the situation. Somebody could get hurt.

You smell that?

It's party time!

Where are those dogs?

I thought I'd never see you again.

What's the occasion? Come to rescue your little friend?

All right! What a woman!

Heigh-ho, heigh-ho, it's off to work we go

This has all been very entertaining. But the party is over.

Hey, man, you're ugly!

Aah! Save me!

Hey, get off my back, woman! I'm driving!

All right, anybody want some cake?

Murder him! Twist his arm!

The gifts were great.

We'll start with a bath.

You know, you're not so bad for a bug-eyed little creep.

You come back here this minute!

Tell me why should I care

What a delightful scoundrel.

#rp memes #rp meme #rp starters #roleplay memes #roleplay starters #roleplay meme #oliver and company

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