#it really shouldn't be difficult

[hella1975]

id like it to be known that i wholeheartedly support abortion. i support abortion for the person whose pregnancy has become too dangerous to come to term. i support abortion for the victim of rape. i support abortion for those who don't have the financial means to have a child. i support abortion for those underage. i support abortion for someone middle-aged with a stable family and finances and loving partner who quite simply does not want a child. i support abortion for people who sleep around. i support abortion for someone who thought they wanted a child but changed their mind. i support abortion in all its infinitely different situations. if it comes to me picking between a bunch of cells that look like fish eggs and an actual living breathing person with a name and future then babe we're having caviar

#fun fact! 9/10 abortions happen before 12 weeks #and over half happen in the first 8 weeks #at 12 weeks your fetus (bc it's not even a baby yet if u want to be technical) is the size of a lime. a fucking lime #i wasnt going to make a post about this bc i dont like bringing politics onto tumblr #bc after how jaded i got with covid and now Everythign Else i wanted a site that could be safe from real world shit #and also it's very tiring that an American Issue suddenly becomes Everyone's Issue and it can be quite frustrating #when that energy isn't met for literally any other country. and i didnt want to contribute to the en masse posting about roe v wade atm #for those two reasons (at least on tumblr. im not actually spiteful about this and obviously really care about the topic. it's just tiring) #but it's come to my attention that somehow i have pro-lifers in these parts #and i want to make it very fucking clear that i dont want them here #me and this blog are completely wholeheartedly pro-choice in any form it may show itself as #because i have enough critical thinking skills to know two basic facts #1) that people have ALWAYS had abortions. the only thing that's changed is the safety in which they're carried out #you will NEVER get rid of them you will only ever endanger the people and women you're trying so hard to 'protect' #and 2) i have never heard of a single person that was happy to get an abortion. not one. it's not a fun experience #it's incredibly hard and traumatic but oftentimes necessary for whatever personal reason specific to that person #stop fucking making laws about other people's bodies #it really shouldn't be difficult

[clockwork-carstairs]

i have to say seeing how popular jem is now, knowing he hasn't always been, is SO reassuring and relieving. not because other characters aren't great or have good values, but because it means jem's standout qualities – things like kindness, compassion, gentleness, being thoughtful – are being appreciated and seen as more important and that's SUCH a good thing. especially knowing ya's history of pushing forward the toxic-cocky-mysterious bad boy agenda… we're finally putting qualities like kindness above that, which is a really positive step forward. i know it's more nuanced than this, and tsc's characters are far more nuanced (jem's sole trait isn't being kind, for instance) but he wasn't always appreciated this much and as a longtime jem fan i truly love to see it. i grew up reading books where the mc always went for the mysterious bad boy character – ruder, testy, provocative – and often these characters were more popular because being kind was seen as 'boring' or meant you could only ever be in the friendzone. jem was one of the first characters i read who had this really horrible backstory, but throughout everything was genuinely just kind. it's really wonderful to see so many people appreciating that :)

#like yes let's keep normalising healthy relationships and kindness yk? #the way tessa fell for jem because he was so compassionate towards her and always listened to her and made her feel great about herself - #like that's the message! #this isn't saying other stories aren't important or interesting #but i'm saying that love interests who are just kind + good are rare and often overlooked in ya and i'm really proud of how much apprecia- #tion jem is getting now #bec a lot of people reading these books will be young and impressionable and like when i was growing up i thought love was meant to be - #rocky and difficult based on the books i read…but no it shouldn't have to be that way #and jem came along and proved that a relationship based on friendship and intimacy can be equally passionate #and he slayed sooooo hard for that #ok i'm done lmao #jem carstairs #tsc #the infernal devices #tid #james carstairs #tessa gray #meta ? #idk #ya

[existencebringsonlypain]

I may have posted about this before, but I don't understand the whole proshipper/anti debate. As far as I understand, I'm on the side of proshippers (i think fiction is fiction and doesn't have to reflect reality. because it's fiction.), but what I don't get is why there's such a clear defined binary, and why there's such animosity between the two. It's just a difference in opinion, like any other, isn't it? I understand that either group can "take it too far" (though i dont really get how proshippers could be TOO okay with problematic ships). but i really think either viewpoint is fine to a degree, they both have logic behind them, and it's just a matter of preference, isn't it?

#what i think i'm getting about why proshippers dislike antis so much is the restrictiveness? #but i dont. i doubt antis really want. like. any problematic relationship to either be eradicated or punished. #i'm willing to guess it's closer to “i don't want relationships that have issues + the narrative doesn't provide anything to challenge them #for me i think that's just kinda uninteresting storytelling but it shouldn't be BANNED. yk. #the idea of fiction is getting to see the world from another perspective. #and some perspectives are fucked up. that's just a fact. in fact it's often more fun to read fiction from someone who's “morally wrong” #because you get to see how they tie themself into knots to justify their actions. #but i completely get why someone might not like that. sometimes it's difficult to read a story where the pov is an asshole. #so just don't read it! it doesn't have to be a big deal! i dont get it #existenceunrelateds #antis #proship #proshipper #antiship #antishipper #proshippers please interact #antis please interact #i want group discussion!

[taichissu]

here's a friendly reminder that if english is your second language it's not "to be expected" or "the bare minimum"; it's actually so impressive and so much work to learn another language, let yourself be proud of it

#i don't see this attitude with any other language; only english #why is someone who speaks german or french seen as more of an intellectual than me even though we both went through the same journey? #learning another language is difficult and shouldn't be something we just expect of people just bc it's such a widespread language #notice how one of the first phrases you learn in a foreign language is 'do you speak english' even when english isn't your first language #it really makes you think

[sheryl-lee]

"gifs = art" could you please elaborate on that besides the skill that goes into it?

🫥 i have no idea why people are looking to me to explain something that has been repeated by many gifmakers and content creators for *years* and should be common sense anyways but...

beyond the skill that goes into gifmaking (the time it takes, the practice required, etc.) the different colorings, typography, blending and other proccesses that some gifmakers use in their creations absolutely can and should be considered an artform. look no further than the gorgeous gifsets some of my very talented mutuals have made:

@yenvengerberg becca's colorful sets are art as far as i'm concerned! like just look at this. she transforms the media she gifs and makes it look completely unreal in terms of sheer beauty and creativity.

@sith-maul one of the best creators on this site. nik is just so so talented. everything she creates is so stunning; you can't look at a set like this, for example, and tell me that it isn't art.

@hoe-biwan again, everything that flo posts is beyond incredible. i don't even watch star wars and i still silently nod my head and gape in awe when one of her sw sets is on my dash. just scroll through the comic book-inspired sets flo's made!!! that's art <3

@buffysummers ok alexandra is such a talented creator and a HUGE inspiration for me when i started giffing years ago. her eye for coloring and scene picking is out of this world! this is a recent set of hers that i particularly adore.

these are just a few examples, but if you scroll through my own blog or the various edit tags for fandoms, you would see more of what i'm talking about. there are so many talented gifmakers and editors on this site who take time out of their busy lives to create for us, and it breaks my heart when their work is discredited or disregarded or underappreciated. for their work to be invalidated and not considered art when it very much is? not only is it rude, it further demotivates creators from contributing to the site and makes them feel like nothing they create is good enough - believe me, i know that feeling all too well.

i've made extremely detailed and color-specific sets before like these, and it took me 3-4 WEEKS. EACH. i'm not exaggerating in the slightest. and since posting them, they've already been reposted here on tumblr and on other sites like pinterest, twitter, instagram, etc. if you even have like a shred of empathy you can understand why that would anger and upset me.

i don't know why people assume that gifmakers copy and paste the same 5 settings on their gifs, export them, and call it a day - it's not that simple at all. so much more goes into making gifs, and the majority of people on this site continue to laugh in our faces, steal the edits we spent so much time and energy on, belittle our work and claim that it isn't art (and friendly reminder! we do this free of charge and ask for nothing in return beyond clicking the reblog button, and so many of you can't even do that much). i shouldn't have to sit here and validate any of that - the creations should speak for themselves. you consider fanvids, fanart and graphics "art" - so why not gifs, which make up the majority of the edits on this site and, in theory, help foster/sustain discussion and fandom?

reposters all run up and down claiming that gifmaking "isn't that difficult" with zero experience... yet if they tried it themselves, they would know that's so far from the truth. and they DO know that deep down, or they wouldn't steal our gifs from us in the first place if gifs were that easy to make 💀

#i really shouldn't have to be saying this in 2023... like ur on tumblr djfdjkdfjk where gifs make up so much of the creations posted here #all we ask for is some respect and to support us when our edits get stolen... what isn't clicking here. #use your brains and don't be a dick! why is that so difficult to comprehend #💌 answered 💌

[cornflowershade]

The way Boston visibly loses his confidence in the second half of ep 12 and never gets it back. Idk how that made me feel but it made me feel some way.

actually you know what it’s not lack of confidence exactly it’s. It's UNCERTAINTY (with a bit of guilt and hurt feelings mixed in.)

he’s left with questions. he's uncomfortable. he's at the end of one thing and the start of the next... he's had some self reflection. he's had some honest conversations with nick. he's offered to be better for his friends—or try to be. he's gone through the process of feeling awful about how he ruins things and treats people: unlike everyone else. it's a sad moment, but he is, essentially, at the beginning of a journey about growth? (echoed by Nick, who leaves in order to find himself again—to love himself and think more deeply about his choices.)

the whole ofts gang has been THROUGH it. lord knows Boston has been THROUGH it. and now he’s feeling the weight—and recognizing the weight— while everyone goes on to confidently ruin their lives again. (hi mix :D)

anyway I hope Ton and Nick succeed in moving forward.

#boston ofts #nickboston #only friends meta #only friends the series #nick ofts #ofts #after this consideration i think it's an emotionally difficult but INTERESTING ending. depressing to watch but hopeful in a way? for Ton #what really is left to annoy me is nick saying boston shouldn't be with anyone. i mean nick tried in that convo but that wasn't the thing. #i wish we had more confirmation that Ton knows this isn't true—that he just needs someone who fits. maybe that'll be part of what he learns #mine

[army-of-bee-assassins]

there's this thing my tumblr app does sometimes that i like to call getting stuck in a time loop, where i will be scrolling for a very long time on my dash and eventually i guess the app just fucking gives up on loading the older posts that i have reached and instead just seamlessly loads the newest posts, the ones that would be at the top of my dash if i were to refresh. and i don't always notice until i get to the "you've caught up" banner that comes right before the posts i had first started on. so despite being miles deep in my dash, i'm right where i first began. and i have to scroll scroll scroll so fucking far through all these same posts again to actually get it back to where the error occured, where this time it correctly loads the older posts that i haven't seen yet.

anyway it used to just happen every so often but recently it's been happening more and more (twice so far today) and it's really fucking annoying. i'm curious if anyone else has experienced this.

#i think it really mostly happens when i've been scrolling for a long time which like fair i probably shouldn't do that #but i follow few enough people that i like to always “catch up” to where i was the last time i opened the app #and this bug really makes that fucking difficult sometimes #j.txt

[sun-marie]

What I really think media with ensemble casts, especially those in a traveling group of some kind, are missing are big, blow-out arguments between the group. Especially when there's a conflict of interests, I am such a sucker for when two or more characters disagree so strongly that they realize very little is actually holding them together as a group, and wonder if it's time to go their separate ways.

I feel like a lot of video games, specifically, just kind of assume once the traveling band is "complete", it's forced to stay together until the player expressly permits it, but I don't really find that very compelling and a lot of times it feels more like they're relying on some kind of immediately strong bond that hasn't really been earned. Which is a shame, because in my opinion one of the best ways to strengthen that bond is to have the characters disagree and argue. Maybe they realize they're only being superficially held together and so they temporarily split up, only to then realize how much they've come to care for the others in the group. Then they reunite, make-up, formulate a plan to go forward, and boom, the group bond is that much stronger. Or maybe they don't even split up, and maybe they never learn to like each other, but they decide whatever cause their working toward is more important. Something else, bigger than them, is holding them together.

It just feels like a lot of potential is going to waste to just skip straight to the intense found family bond, without earning it.

#there are exceptions of course #like I thought it was clever how bg3 did it where the group didn't necessarily intend to be traveling together this long #and then once they learned about the tadpoles and the artifact it turns out it's either stay together or die #but a disagreement between them every once and a while instead of assuming they're all insta-besties couldn't hurt #and DA2 kinda circumvents this by Hawke not really going anywhere #so if Fenris isn't having a good time with Anders he can just like stay home and vice versa #but games like Octopath Traveler 2 would really benefit from some stronger disagreements #like my first playthrough Castti's ch. 4 and Osvald's ch. 5 lined up right next to each other #and like vague ot2 spoilers #but what I would give to see them hash it out #over whether to save thousands of people Castti doesn't know potentially at the cost of saving one person Osvald cares a great deal for #or vice versa #especially with how hardened Osvald's become it would have been soooo juicy #i get that would've been difficult to implement and that's probably more the job of fanfic #but that's just an example of what I mean #idk I just think more creators shouldn't be afraid to have their characters seriously argue with each other #because not every disagreement is a dealbreaker and can in fact strengthen their bonds #and like not every game cast needs to be found family! but if you want that found family effect you have to show them arguing like a family #poe1 is a good example of a group that travel together and don't necessarily have this tight bond #they just feel like good friends (mostly) #i had other examples that I can't think of now and may add later #I feel like I was going somewhere with this but yeah it's just something I've been thinking about #let characters fight sometimes. conflict is what makes stories good #edit: FE: 3 Houses was the other example I was thinking of! #like things get pretty dire in the Blue Lions route and Dimitri has some pretty questionable moments #but with the exception of like Felix hardly anyone calls him out on it they just kind of go along with it #and lo and behold Felix is one of my favorite 3H characters and his friendship with Dimitri is extremely compelling #bc their friendship was tested and survived #marie speaks

[pinktinselmonstrosity]

alright i have a mild dilemna that i need advice on

on my course we have to post these weekly self-reflection things responding to the themes of the week's class and some questions about it. i posted last week's and yesterday the course convenor replied to it in a way that implies i was wrong (in my SELF reflection) and just generally misunderstands my point/takes it in bad faith. i've shown these posts to others on the course and they agree that my original post adressed the things her reply asks about and that she has misinterpreted me, in quite a "cheeky" way

my issue now is: do i reply and try to explain myself better? or is it better to just let it go?

i don't want to dig myself in deeper if she's really opposed to my viewpoint, but at the same time i do feel like i answered the questions thoroughly in the first place and the things she's accusing me of aren't fair

#to be clear we were working on issues of identity this week #and we visited a specific gallery in the national museum of scotland and in our reflection we had to talk about how it reflected identity #and i talked about how all of my scottish friends loved it and it was really effective in provoking nostalgia in them #but that as a non-scottish person i wasn't able to access a lot of the exhibits because they assumed prior knowledge #and i said (or at least i thought i made clear) that i think it's good to have a gallery focusing on scottish identity #but that for a museum which aims to ''show scotland to the world'' this gallery doesn't do a very good job #and i finished by saying that i understand issues of identity are difficult and i don't have an answer for how they should be negotiated #these were just MY observations and feelings (which. again. is what i thought the SELF reflection was for) #and one of the other non-scottish students (a chinese girl) replied and said that she agreed #and that she even tried going on a guided tour of the gallery but she still couldn't really learn anything from it #and the course convenor (who btw is not scottish either so. take from that what u will) replies saying that #the gallery actually isn't MEANT for international visitors it's only meant for scottish people #and ''why can't scottish people have somewhere to express their identity in THEIR national museum?'' #which. first of all were all points i made in my post #and second of all - if that gallery isn't meant for international visitors to be able to understand then WHY DID YOU ASK US TO GO THERE #WHAT DID YOU EXPECT US TO SAY??? bear in mind i'd say at least 60% of people on the course aren't scottish #anyway yeah. i wasn't trying to say that scottish people shouldn't be able to express their identity #and i thought i made that clear in the post but obviously not? #but the people i asked about it are all scottish and they all said they thought what i said was fine #and in fact they agreed with a lot of my points!! #ugh i just don't know what to do #bc my instinct is to defend myself and that if i just re-explain then she'll get what i'm saying #but maybe that's not sensible? especially bc i was pretty clear the first time #🧃

[roseofcards90]

I wish I could tell if people still care or not 😭

#it's becoming difficult for me to really tell ngl #idk anymore my life is my own all my thoughts are plagued but I already decided I myself shouldn't care either lol so #I keep thinking back to that one time on my friend's birthday where I genuinely felt like I was gonna die 😭 like the pain was that bad #and like it seems silly when I look back on it now but like idk in that moment at least I could see that people cared about me #do I have to end up like that again for some semblance of understanding that the people I know love me? #because otherwise all I get is uncertainty criticism or both lmao it's like do I have to be in physical pain for you to be concerned? #since you can't understand my mental pain? #idk I'm just saying things now I feel like #my posts

[lucky-clover-gazette]

bitches be like "oh i'm good now" no idiot you're crying again

#i'm doing this to myself btw #sorry just venting #i know i shouldn't #just going through a lot of emotional lows and highs and it's really fucking difficult to do it alone

[isfjmel-phleg]

I have been working on the wretched paper for nearly an hour and have only about 300 words and emotional exhaustion to show for it. Better than nothing, but it shouldn't be this hard.

#random personal stuff #it's not even a really difficult part either #less analysis more describing things #and I know this book! forwards and backwards! #it shouldn't be difficult to piece together what I already know perfectly well #about characters who are old friends and whom I feel like I know as well as if they were real #maybe tomorrow will be better although I doubt I'll have a lot of time #but I really need to get moving on this

[yasashiiku]

Odd things in Shou's room. #1

Shou's room doesn't look anything out of your regular teenager, stray clothes, posters on the walls, gaming consoles and unorganized school books, with a touch of his hobbies here and there, painter tools, sketch books, large canvas frames, drawings on papers sticking out from between school notes and manga magazines, but never any art on the walls. A quick in and out wouldn't give you an impression of anything out of ordinary, but once one makes their place in Shou's life, once he allows them in, they get to notice relics he isn't exactly proud of, marks that Claw left, ironically.

Under his bed and out of sight, there is a bunch of notebooks, old worns out colorful notebooks, completely filled with notes collected from his last three years of work with Claw, his job as his father's "errands boy" paid off in the form of rich intel that he made sure to jot down to remember. His job technically involved keep an eye on the various Claw divisions, and since he was planning to tear down the whole thing to the ground, he made sure to get valuable information with each visit, ie; location of the bases, names of their scars and their division leaders, their powers, their sponsors, from where do they get supplies and where do they keep them, their various connections to businesses, contractors, black market dealers, and even state employees who were paid to look the other way while Claw did their things, and many many other things that even Claw's boss wasn't aware of.

The notes are difficult to make sense of for anyone who isn't Shou, scribbles in his terrible handwriting and 40% inaccurate kanji, there's no date of eneries to organize anything unless it's specifically important, and everything is rather ordered by themes and events related to each piece of information. There are also personal notes accumulated by times, alongside newspapers snippets for evidence and sacred files he got his hands on and attached them to the notebook accordingly. On the margins, doodles can be found, of his first hamster, of Fukuda, then Ootsuki, and then all three of them as Higashio joined on the latest of his notes. There are drawings from nature as well, miserable seagulls from a stormy day he spent at the beach, careful rabbits from a snowy day he spent on the mountains, the amount of personal art is actually embarrassing to him, he isn't comfortable showing his notes to anyone.

When Claw was dismantled and the government went on a spree of scoping up targets and victims, Shou spent the night before his interrogation with government agents in organizing his notes as much as he can, going through everything from start to finish, adding more details as he remembered, and highlighting what he recognized as anything the government would deem useful. After making sure his precious notes were ready, thoughtful and determined and tired, he started making a list of names, jotting down as many as he remembered, leaving it for a while because he was suffering meltdowns because holy shit a lot was happening, then coming back with more and more names, it didn't take long for the list to accommodate several papers.

These were the names of everyone who has stumbled into Claw by accident, or were kidnapped by force, anyone who wanted out and couldn't just simply leave, people just like himself, who would have happily helped annihilating Claw if they had a chance. Like his lackeys who actually helped, or brainwashed children like Mukai, or older people whom he knows had good intentions but little to no say in anything, acquaintances from whom he learnt miserable stories, people who wanted to live their lives and wake up from the Nightmare that was life with Claw. People who certainly didn't deserve to be put in jail after Claw was over.

Despite being repeatedly told that his interrogation wasn't one for negotiating, Shou refused to speak a word of anything valuable unless every single person in his list is confirmed to left alone and safe, the agents claimed such a thing wasn't plausible, and Shou wasn't having it, a lot of things weren't going his way lately, he certainly didn't have patience for yet another situation he can't control. He put his notebooks on the table, and after making sure the government became aware of how they really need such information (he made an example by giving them everything he knows about one of the divisions), he threatened to burn everything right then and there and claimed that they'd have to torture him if they wish to get anything, if they can defeat him at first, that is.

Shou might have failed to actively take down his dad, but that didn't stop him from doing everything in his power to save whoever he knew was innocent, at the end the government had no choice but to accept the trade, with the condition that Shou would be available to help identifying people, which he gladly agreed to.

#Odd things in Shou's room. #he's just a good kid ok #with responsibility that really really shouldn't have been his in the first place #and it's so??? difficult but he still doesn't run away from his problems #shou is genuinely good intentioned even tho he doesn't look or sound like it 90% of the time #but can u blame him Toichiro is his dad #⤷ ᯽･ﾟ: 鈴木将 | headcanon. #long post /

[forecast-rain]

anyways, moving on from past reblogs, made a character bingo! I don't remember what you did with these tbh? try to get a bingo of recognition or smth? hm. I wonder how easy it is to get a bingo for this board lmao...

since I'm not exactly confident in how I drew some of these characters, the names and fandoms of all characters under the cut!

#cloud posts #I tried to align it so the most Favorite favorites were in the middle while any Not As Favorites were more on the outer edges #I don't think I succeeded the most with this but lmao #I'm pretty sure none of this is really obscure... #so shouldn't be too difficult to get a bingo ? #ask game #I guess lol

[givemewallywestorgivemedeath]

your tags on parenting make me super emotional <3 that's exactly the kind of parent I want to be one day

Thanks! I feel the same way honestly. I have a lot of opinions about parenting and I can't say that I will be the perfect parent because that doesn't exist. I can't even say that my hypothetical future kid/kids will be perfect because children don't grow in a vacuum. I can only control what I do and say and try to be the best version of myself and hope for the best.

#i often hear people say that involved parenting is too difficult to be realistic or that modeling behavior is too hard #and yeah. yeah it is. it is one of the most difficult things a person can do. but who the fuck has a kid thinking it'll be easy? #kids are hard work and commitment. they should never be something done on a whim. you should never half ass raising a kid #and not to say that people should be perfect all the time or that people shouldn't have 'me' time #its just that i genuinely don't understand people who shove their kid into as many activities as possible to get away from them #or put all their hopes and dreams and expectations on them. if it's so easy and attainable to live up to your expectations as a parent #then do it first. you want your kid to have straight A's? great. show me your report card at that age #im just... kids are just people. and they just want to hang out with their parents and receive love and attention #and anyway ive lost my point im just very passionate about this topic #very passionate #when im older and financially stable I want to foster teenagers i think. i want to be there for them and model healthy adult behavior #and help them make that transition. i want to be that person for them. because everyone needs help and love and family #and honestly? my parents fostered kids my entire life. THEY MODELED THAT BEHAVIOR #i understand that family is not a given. i understand that family is above all else forged. and that applies to everyone #not just found family or fostering. if you don't know your bio child then can you really call yourself family? #family is *forged* regardless of the context. and if it isn't? if you skip that step with your bio kids? well thats a major fucking issue #anyway nothing but respect for my parents who bought groceries for my foster sister when she was out of care. FOR MONTHS #nothing but respect for my parents who took me with them to give my foster sister their old stroller when she needed it #nothing but respect for my parents who take in my old foster brother every weekend to 'babysit' because they know he isnt in a loving house #nothing but respect for my parents who adopted my siblings without a word when they asked #honestly they are why i am who i am today. i was a kid with adhd and learning disabilities who hated school #and now I'm an honors student and getting my doctorate. because they did the academia with me #and im not saying they did my schoolwork. im saying that they assigned books to read over the summer and we would read them as a family #and we would discuss the literary concepts and themes together as a family. i love dissecting media! and thats because of my parents! #it was a family activity! same goes for science and art and music #and coding and history ect ect #anyway im going off on a tangent but basically what im saying is that my parents didn't ship me off to camp every summer #we just did things as a family together. i remember the time and bonding with them. and i modeled that behavior #and not to brag but i think I turned out alright #anyway tangent over!

[give-soup-please]

(me, preparing an important presentation on queer issues): ah, yes, doing this will make my favorite fictional characters so proud of me >:)

Me, cont: yes, they will indeed be proud of me for standing in front of an audience and talking, despite the fact that they do not exist, cannot see me, and do not know of my existence. making fictional characters proud of me is something that is both normal to want and possible to achieve...

(does anyone else do this?)

#personal #like... i'm doing something difficult #and pretending that they're going to be proud of me if i pull it off helps #if i manage to pull off what i'm trying to pull off it will be huge #even if the audience is limited #i'm half debating advertising it to get some extra publicity #sending the zoom link by which people would be able to watch me #but... hmm... #my topic is a little controversial #it's about the intersection of the queer and christian community #and how christians should learn to be more chill with LGBT+ folk #and... how christians and LGBT+ people shouldn't be enemies #but instead focus on the real villains of the world- white supremacists and nazis #this will be incredibly difficult to handle with sensitivity and grace #and i'm really scared of doing it for a lot of reasons #putting a few different kinds of potential targets on my back to deliver an important message #but if i do it..... and do it well... #i'm sure the fictional characters i adore would be so proud of me despite the fact that they don't exist #and cannot see me or know who i am