#its the level of concentration

[in-a-slanted-outhouse]

Aidan trying his hardest to put mascara on is one of the best things I’ve seen all week

#its the level of concentration #he was listening so attentatively as his friend explained #it was really sweet #found all this off a clip on instagram #the eighth photo is when he got it in his eye #the video isnt even that long #the best bit has gotta be when his friend says ‘you look beautifullll’ and he does a lil smile #and goes ‘this is so weirdddd’ #he looked pretty content though #louie says shit #aidan gallagher

[mewtwo24]

I finally finished reading the fourth volume of svsss in full, and thing is--the first time through I only read the bingqiu content because I was ravenous for more of their happy ending.

Turns out that was a perilous mistake.

Because I started reading the airplane extras. And I swear to god. MXTX is trying to kill me

What do you MEAN demon lord Binghe was sitting on his big fucking throne. All stoic and forbidding. Surrounded by his demon generals who don't know shit about human courtship. Asking them what he should do, fully demoralized by constant rejections from sqq, only to have airplane tell him to act more pathetic and needy. Which is already hysterically funny and insane, UNTIL LBH'S RESPONSE IS THIS, KILLING ME INSTANTLY:

LUO BINGHE. WHY DOES HE SAY IT LIKE: "I already tried that, didn't work--nothing works :/ not mean, not maidenly, not housewife, not spicy, not capable disciple. Is doubling down on clingy really all it will take? What's a born hater with only one love in his life to do????"

The dichotomy of him sitting there like 'how can I reach the unfathomable depths of shizun's heart?' A HEART HE'S ALREADY WON OVER, MIND and then in the Holy Mausoleum solving the puzzle without blinking and being like 'oh yeah you just have to hit the acupoints, no sweat.' Literally the comedy writes itself I'm so--

How am I supposed to be normal about this. MXTX understands the juicy quintessential queer joy of a person with the world's power at their fingertips wishing only for love. Willing to do anything to earn that love, when unbeknownst to them it's already been freely given. Totally not screaming and yelling and clawing at the walls

And that's not even touching airplane's uproarious account of events. The way he's like 'lol what's next, lbh and sqq are best friends now? smfh' only to see lbh TACKLE SQQ LOVINGLY. FOR SQQ TO BE BASHFUL ABOUT IT BUT SO SO FOND OF THE LITTLE SCAMP. This when we've been experiencing sqq's constant inner monologue of 'I'm so cool and so dignified about my role, truly the epitome of propriety and poser-level fortitude.' Meanwhile, in their universe:

Airplane constantly flaming???? Sqq and lbh in his observations????? His absolute bewilderment and confusion????? Legendary. No notes every single second of this shit was hilarious.

Airplane's comment that sqq + older adolescent lbh traveling together was just watching a couple in their honeymoon phase. OR the fact that lbh is exceedingly petty and refuses to share their food in the wake of airplane's interruption of their time together, until sqq relents sheepishly and insists airplane eat what's left (ONLY AFTER PLACATING LBH WITH MORE FOOD FROM HIS PLATE, SOBBING)

Watching airplane salivate over Mobei-Jun and acting like that's totally normal behavior. Finding out mbj and airplane got together first. Finding out sqq encouraged airplane. LIKE THIS. WHILE HE IS STILL IN DENIAL ABOUT HIS OWN FEELINGS:

Mobei-jun clearly thinking their arrangement is a forever thing, heartbroken his human abandoned him with all the hapless fury of a scorned wife swept away by false promises of fidelity. Airplane writing demons to be the type to beat up their crush lovingly and still unable to connect the dots about mbj's feelings. Mbj letting him go and respecting his wishes, only relenting when there's indication airplane was poorly processing his own feelings and didn't actually want to leave. Mbj caring for him and listening to him as soon as airplane voices what he needs directly and with clarity. None of these gays are functional and it's everything to me

Unrelated, but I physically can't hold this information in anymore:

I'm still reeling from younger lbh having his sexual awakening from the image of sqq wrapped in the immortal binding cables. Condemn me as you like he was so, so real for that.

And no I will not be taking any comments about how luo bingge couldn't bear to see luo binghe cherished in ways he never got to have and all the haunting implications of that. I will also not be taking any comments about luo binghe's instinct to look for sqq in that alternate universe, only to be shaken to the very core to be unable to find his shizun anywhere. The unspeakable and latent horror of his relentless mind likely piecing together what happened, but unable to say it; to suspect what is true, and live with the harrowing confusion of his double's actions. To blame himself, to assume that he had let his anger get the better of him in that world and result in unspeakable folly...

I also refuse to talk about how heartrending it is to hear Tianlang-jun weakly say "In the end, I really can't bring myself to hate humans." The implication that the foolishness of that hope and bright-eyed fondness--the very thing that put him through such unspeakable agony--couldn't be beaten out of him entirely. To discover that his faith in Su Xiyan hadn't been misplaced, to the contrary: his beloved hadn't scorned him at all, but rather fought to the miserable end to protect the fruition of their genuine feelings of love when she couldn't protect tlj or herself.

How MXTX has sqq deliberately draw parallels between their situation and that of ygy+sj and tlj+sx; desperately wishing it might not be too late for them. The concept of breaking cycles of abuse and harm pervasive throughout the newly devised story, how it evolves for the better only when love takes the place of power, pride, and domination. How the moment sqq chooses vulnerability instead of saving face, the genre shifts to the so-called "cringe" girly genre where most if not every character is more fulfilled, more true to themselves. How the "male-oriented" former genre was aimlessly sensationalized and sexualized, how it was a sustained performance of aspirational toxic masculinity. How men objectify other men without end. All of the unspoken gendered implications that come with that.

Anyways. Going to go put my head in a sandbox and try to process everything I just witnessed because even a second reading is not enough to find a modicum of closure.

#svsss #bingqiu #moshang #i swear to god this series is just 'gay man who doesn't know shit inflicting his delusional reality on everyone else and inciting chaos' #and literally it's slapstick levels of hilarious every single time; mxtx never change #also i fully agree that we did not get NEARLY enough mobei-jun and sqh/airplane content #the amount of mental illness to mental illness communication going on there was astonishing #mobei-jun being afraid of his uncle and bringing sqh because that's the only person he trusts fully (WAILING NOISES) #sqh having a tantrum but running away because for the first time he was honest about his needs + his dissatisfaction with catering to other #how that reflects his narrative compulsions and how he felt forced to warp more creative story paths for the sake of survival as a writer #how sqq's restoration of much of his original intent--as well as mobei-jun's acceptance of his needs--helps airplane begin to heal #how his happiness begins; how just like sqq he wanders in such confusion and denial before he's forced to realize what truly matters to him #SHREK VOICE: STORIES HAVE. L A Y E R S #it feels like modern day shakespeare and when i say that i don't mean it in a hollow elevating sense i mean it more like #mxtx just hits that perfect balance of poignance but also hilarious concentric circles of botched communication and brainworms #okay but real talk for a minute? .........;-; #the way lbh constantly struggles with such a crushing feeling that he'll be abandoned over any little mishap/thing/problem #really hit me where it hurts??? if only because its so clearly an anxiety that stems from original goods' upbringing #the way it becomes even more heartrending when you think back to all the sect leaders clamoring that he should have been killed as an infan #that he should have been aborted as a fetus--insisting right in front of him that his birth was a mistake and a disgrace #over having demon blood in his veins. like my god that scene is so viscerally upsetting i struggle to read it #the way its so easy to see the demons as a manifestation of otherness in precipitated form #how both sqq and sqh are influenced by human rhetoric without evening meaning to--assuming the worst against their better judgment #how both sqq and sqh both struggle with their own otherness in different ways and only find solace when they begin to accept who they are #how their lovers (lbh and mbj respectively) both are willing to navigate those confusing waters with them #how both demons love them as they are--accept them as they are despite how difficult forgiveness of perceived betrayal is for them #ty mxtx for changing my brain chemistry #as i get older i have such a fondness for the messiness of thematic queer self-discovery and growth into self-acceptance #that and how youth can so easily be defined by perfectionistic self-harm and the violence of repression

[quixoticanarchy]

Because my latest accidental interest is chemical weapons, and because all my interests end up infected with a Tolkien angle, I present to you this: the Nazgûl attacks as interpreted as a form of chemical warfare.

This lines up well both with the Nazgûl ability to inflict fear on a mass scale and with the impacts of the Black Breath. People don't necessarily know what they're facing or what's happening to them, but both the experience and even the threat of it are terrifying. It also allows the obvious evocation of WWI gas warfare, though not, say, accompanied by the physical effects of chlorine or mustard. The Black Breath has both psychological and physiological effects which require medical treatment, and this description I think could be applied essentially unchanged to instances of chemical warfare:

At length even the stout-hearted would fling themselves to the ground as the hidden menace passed over them, or they would stand, letting their weapons fall from nerveless hands while into their minds a blackness came, and they thought no more of war, but only of hiding and of crawling, and of death.

I also think it would be fun if athelas (which treats the Black Breath) was a member of the nightshade family (which includes sources of natural atropine, which can treat the effects of exposure to certain chemical agents). This would put the Black Breath in the second generation of chemical agents, maybe a type of organophosphate nerve gas

#nerve gas while not actually used in wwii did carry a lot of weight just via the fear/threat of its use #since you don't get all the physical burning/asphyxiation/blindness symptoms of wwi agents i suggest the black breath is either #a ''riot control'' level incapacitant or a military weapon level nerve gas. at such concentrations that it doesnt kill instantly per se #tolkien #lotr #nazgûl #chemical warfare #skravler

[wizardnuke]

i love dnd..i love playing heavy utility/support/backfield and i love having three to six attacks in a turn and an insane ac. at heart im a support player ill get my hands on whatever we're missing in a group

#looks at a druid a fighter and a bard fighter. okay cleric time. #i LOVE playing cleric turns out. #though abjuration wizard is still super super fun its a different flavor of support #it's not buffs it's 'i am going to transfer literally all that damage to myself and war caster style succeed my witchbolt concentration' #doing insane amounts of damage while taking damage (+ with temp hp and then just a lot of hp. im taking the tough feat as soon as possible) #aabria iyengar was right these abjuration wizards are craaaazy. but war domain clerics also fuck hard #my abj wiz is very much an experiment in 'what if someone who is not at all suited to this life tries to adapt as well as she can' #the point is that she isn't a cleric. do u understand. she's not a cleric and that's the point it's the. hbbbgbfhb. she's out here #functioning as a combat medic on some aasimar features + healing kits/potions + arcane ward. Look At Me #i also really enjoy playing nonreligious characters in these worlds where deities 100% exist not in a 'fuck the gods' way but in #a way somewhere between 'i'm all i need' and 'i called and no one answered' and 'may or may not go on an insane power hungry spiral and #try to get a touch of godhood' which is in part very due to my own agnostic and people-loving heart and 'haha what if i icarused this girl' #a resentful caution towards gods an immense respect towards religious companions and 'when your god isn't here to help. i will be' #anyway REACTION arcane ward you don't take damage im fine. next turn reaction shield ward's back up. the thing is. #she will drive her hp down. the ward isn't much like it goes past that temp hp. it's 14hp that shit goes down and carries to her hp #but it never drops. any leveled spell puts hp back into the ward. a 1st lvl shield puts it at 2hp and she can use it again #she is not suited for these conditions but my god it is fun to watch. i care her. #i explained that subclass feature to a player that's not in that campaign and said. like. yeah she can take damage. when her ward drops to #0 it carries to her. any leveled abj spell puts it back up. and she can use it and drive her hp down again. #do u understand what i am explaining to u! do you get it! she is and has always been a punching bag! #she was a very valuable asset to the army and the group she was drafted! into. because when she's there. people just don't fucking go down #aside from her. aside from her. AAAAH. she's so cool. she is very smart i am still riding the high of critting every turn w witchbolt and #reacting to ward a party member against a crit that would have dropped him by taking the hit herself. and she didn't break concentration #badass

[everymadara]

Chapter 601

#naruto #madara #madara uchiha #uchiha madara #edo tensei #ninja breaking bad #+ naruto #see that's the thing. if the weapon could do that on its own why didn't Obito use it more often. #It's definitely 90% Madara pouring his own chakra into it #Which must be a fucking lot if he can repel a concentrated miniature Bijuu Bomb #I mean it's not so surprising we know he has enough chakra to level mountains but like. wow. #A huge chunk of Madara's superiority complex is deserved I fear #edit: the databook really only says that it repels jutsu through wind chakra and not the limit to what jutsu this can be done for #So I assume it depends on the user's chakra

[satuurnos]

assignment due at 11:59 almost done . now onto a presentation I have not made yet that I must record and submit by 8 am

#i HATE online classes it literally was not my choice its all my uni offers for specific upper level classes for my concentration #and the stupid program they use does not work for my 'out of sight out of mind' bc the professor posts stuff in discussion forums and it #gets lost in the other notifications and bc its not an assigment it doesnt have a due date . and i was like la la la la la all weekend like #ooooo i have nothing to do BITCH i had a whole presentation i could've had done by now 😭😭😭😭😭😭 #i hate post covid school

[mail-me-a-snail]

5, 8, 9, and 15 :o)

5. What's their moral compass like?

vance often ops to act with the least amount of harm he can do in mind. arasaka training still runs deep; he plots every little situation out so he can judge what can and cannot be taken out of the equation. he will never target bystanders, esp if theyr'e kids.

that being said, anyone else is fair game if they stand in his way <3

8. Do they feel glee at the sight of blood?

he certainly gets a thrill when it's splattered across the ground or on the wall and it catches the light in just the right way. like i said, though, he won't go out of his way to ensure the most chaotic and bloody outcome.

if trauma team shows up to some warehouse out in northside to find nothing but viscera and blood scattered around the place...well, that's just how the situation fell in vance's favor! he had no hand in causing the firefight that tore this place to shreds, no sir...

9. What do they regret the most?

not being able to meet johnny before all this relic shit happened. maybe it's dumb of him to think he might've been someone other than an arasaka agent in the 2000's, but he really. really would've liked to just be johnny's at a point in the latter's life when they would've been at their happiest. when they had had nothing to worry about.

when the music was good and vance was somebody that'd fit into johnny's memories, as easy if he were really there in the first place.

15. How do they kill? Do they try to minimize suffering?

it depends! he'll stick a knife between someone's eyes instead of slitting their throat if that'll kill them faster. he'll tweak their systems with his quickhacks here and there, nothing major, maybe a cyberware malfunction to distract them and nudge them out of his way.

but in active combat situations?

he's going for everyone's neural implants and he won't stop until their heads burst. he's a very aggressive netrunner; he'll dig his claws into people's chrome before tearing them up at the seams, little by little, for as much RAM as it takes until they're smoking right before they flatline.

#asks #vance #one of vance's party tricks is making a small group of people's neural implants pop. its hard. and its not something he can do often #he can only do it to maybe four people at a time #but he has to Really concentrate #bc he will be picking apart four different people with varying levels of ICE and other protective blockers #at the SAME TIME.

[pristine-starlight]

Struggling so much to remember what the fuck i did read during elementary school, especially in lower grades

I remember what my sister read?? And also a bunch of individual books i read around that time Probably

But aside from that idk. 80s scifi? Pulpy paperbacks about legionaires?? That second one sounds especially bad but i Specifically remember being in 5th grade and trying to cope with being made to watch fuckin Fatelessness by reading Rejtő under the desk

#kata's chatter #if i said the magic schoolbus books thatd be unfair i think bc like #it was the Show that shaped my childhood on a major level #the books we had bc of it and they werent. the best #they were alright and i did love them they just v clearly werent translated by the same team #which made for some odd bits #anyway realising that the grand majority of stuff i read/got read by parents as a kid was hungarian #so this really says nothing to anyone but me #also before anyone takes things the wrong way: #the problem with fatelessness was that i was fuckin 12 and its a graphic movie about concentration camps

[moodr1ng]

i think theres probably something interesting going on regarding the relationship between.. how accessible a form of media is to create at a professional level for an average individual or small group (eg: writing at a professional level is comparatively very accessible, making a movie at a professional level is comparatively inaccessible) vs which forms of media are currently dominating whats considered mainstream and which forms appear to not be valued as much anymore. but any conclusion i draw upon would only be anecdotal so its whatever

#like i think literature has become more and more devalued #but also stuff like the booktok fad has made it rise again so i cant point to numbers to say that #but also.. you know.. idk it doesnt feel like any of that has the cultural impact of movies for example #i am generally talking abt 'accessible' in the sense of financially permissible #obvs access overall to art is limited by many more factors #im just talking about like. can some average person afford to create this realistically. #anyway it FEELS to me like culturally we are moving towards artistic relevance and cultural power being #being given to forms of media which only people who have or are given massive funding can participate in #and in which there is basically no independent market of the same quality/level #while not highly valuing forms of art where its very very easy to find any random person producing it independently #and that feels like a concentration of media power and cultural imagination into the hands of the rich #which isnt rly a hot take we know this ofc. but it feels like we further advance into it w time

[minarcana]

#i got writng done on my fate blog at least but like #i rly wanna write here except i cant concentrate #bc the apartment like down the compex and one over from mine #is playing ASTONISHINGLY LOUD LATIN DANCE BEATS #and while they ARE bangers. it is 1:35 AM and theyve been doing this since like. 9 or 10? #and its not My music so i cant concentrate and write to it but if i play My music its Dual Inputs #i cannot stress enough: theyre not my neighbours. theyre in a separate building. Its Really Loud Dance Beats #please @ god i just want to write elfs #at least im almost done leveling rdm so i can get all the job quests in shb but my god

[girlblocker]

btw being banned from high impact exercises really sucks for me bc like. jumping on mini trampoline or on floor is my #1 coping skill . it is everything to me i usually do it multiple times per day and now i cant do it at all or i might fracture my leg (if i didnt already fracture it)

#i havent done it since monday and its like. i can feel my concentration failing #and im fidgeting more but in ways i dont like #like im picking at my fingernails so much :( #and i cant watch anime or listen to music bc that like. elevates my energy level i guess? and makes me want to jump

[thisgodwontforgiveyou]

well i watched deutschland by rammstein

#lot of things to be said but the best summary is that its germans doing wolfenstein new order to germany #complete with the concentration camp level

[wizardnuke]

whoever told me that abjuration wizards suck were lying to my faceeee see this subclass is so cool. i guess if someone likes playing glass cannon wizards it's a shit class but this girl i've got is. well she is tormenting my dm is what she's doing. good class

#what you're gonna do is hit level six okay and you're gonna #cast mage armor on yourself and in addition to that since it's an abjuration spell you're gonna add arcane ward (temp hp) #and at lvl6 you can use a reaction to direct any damage an ally takes within 30 feet of you onto your arcane ward and you're gonna #cast shield when you need to (Careful tho. only one reaction per round. redirect damage Or shield) and since shield is also an abjuration #spell you're gonna take the level you cast it at and double it. and put that into your arcane ward's hp. any abjuration spell puts hp #back into the ward. MEANWHILE you're concentrating on witch bolt. and you're not even risking con saves because you Aren't Getting Hit #so you are essentially nullifying damage that others take (if your ward hp depletes you take the remaining damage and can't cast it again) #while frying people alive every turn forever and ever until they die or go out of range. bless this bizarre combat medic wizard build #i don't have the numbers but i know a'velle took a good half of the fight's damage on her own and only lost 2hp in the fight #one day i decided that i wanted to play a combat medic wizard. and then i was like. wow this is not useful. and then level 6 hit #miss girl was standing there crit-frying a crocodile alive while waiving damage over to her ward and boosting its hp with bonus actions #gotta say. the fight was two crocs and a couple of little guys. miss girl dropped both of the crocs #NOO WAIT THE WARD DOESN'T DROP AT 0HP I JUST HAVE TO CAST ANOTHER ABJURATION SPELL. WOAG

[healthproduct95]

NeuroActiv6 Supplements - Health

#Focus and a Natural Energy Boost: My Experience with NeuroActiv6 SupplementsSharper #I've always been interested in natural ways to support my brain health and cognitive function. That's why I decided to try NeuroActiv6 supp #a natural berry-flavoured drink mix. After using it for a few months now #I'm impressed with the positive impact it's had on my focus #energy levels #and overall well-being. #Natural Ingredients for Brainpower #One of the things that drew me to NeuroActiv6 was its focus on natural ingredients. The formula includes a blend of powerful extracts like #Citicoline #and Coffee Fruit Extract. These ingredients are known for their potential benefits in improving memory #enhancing focus #and supporting brain health. #For example #Ashwagandha is an adaptogenic herb that has been traditionally used in Ayurvedic medicine to promote relaxation and reduce stress. Citicoli #on the other hand #contains natural antioxidants and may support cognitive function without the jitters associated with caffeine. #A Convenient and Delicious Way to Boost Brainpower #NeuroActiv6 comes in a powdered form that easily mixes into water or your favourite juice. The berry flavour is refreshing and pleasant #making it a joy to consume every day. The single-serving packets are also incredibly convenient #allowing me to easily take them with me on the go #whether I'm at work #the gym #or travelling. #Improved Focus and Mental Clarity #Since incorporating NeuroActiv6 into my daily routine #I've noticed a significant improvement in my focus and mental clarity. I find it easier to concentrate on tasks for longer periods without #where I need to be able to process information quickly and efficiently. #Increased Energy Levels and Reduced Stress #Beyond the cognitive benefits #I've also experienced a boost in my energy levels. The natural ingredients in NeuroActiv6 seem to give me a sustained energy lift througho

[geraskier]

caprice is now a level 6 bard/level 2 monk, with the helldusk gloves that add necrotic damage on unarmed attacks (along with a chance to inflict bleeding), as well as boots that give lightning charge upon dashing, and the jolty vest thing that shocks melee attackers using lightning charges. still dual-wielding hand crossbows for long range combat, and i took the dual wielding perk that increases AC. im dying a lot less partially bc ive learned how to better economize combat actions also.

gave karlach the dual wielding perk to increase her AC, and conversely am having lae'zel use two-handed weapons this time. kinda evens things out that way too, cause lae'zel has the extra action skill so she doesn't really need the offhand weapon attack. astarion kicks ass with the shrieking sword and the AOE saving throw penalty is extemely useful for bard spells.

(side note: the intimidation bonus from the durge origin pairs very well with performance/deception/persuasion bard bonuses.)

OH. something i noticed: caprice can't melee dual-wield with anything larger than shortswords, scimitars, or daggers. i suspect this is connected to being "small" instead of "medium" sized, as astarion does not have this problem and he has the same strength score (8). i don't care either way bc of my focus on unarmed strikes but that's still interesting.

#i still dont really see the utility of a lot of the spells that prompt saving throws and require concentration. #theres so many points of failure and the enemies youd want to immobilize the most #are the ones most resistant to charisma checks wisdom checks etc #also losing an action turn can destroy your party if theres a lot of enemies #tashas hideous laughter is good cause its not limited by enemy type the way hold person and hold beast are #altho i think it requires an intelligence of 5 or above. #newt needs a text post tag #newt plays bg3 #at some point in the future i might redo a shiv playthru just to refine his druid battle style #i think i relied a bit too heavily on melee attacks with shiv instead of utilizing cantrips. #even with the circle of spore health buff he did not have the hp to constantly smack enemies with a quarterstaff #maybe i could have taken a lower charisma score and gotten higher wisdom earlier? #dont think multiclassing would have been the way to go for shiv #edit: level 2 monks get a movement speed bonus which is GREAT cause deep gnomes #have a starting movement speed of 7.5m and theres better uses for misty step clothing items

[lizisshortforlizard]

I went to write for the first time in aaaaaaages and of course ao3 has an error message

Cue aneurysm that I’d lost my account, that I’d lost an entire almost completed chapter of LD

I need to stop not saving my stuff elsewhere

#i also need to stop having chapters only a sentence or two away from completion and then hiding from them for weeks #my concentration levels have gone weird again #its been a rough 3 months