#just like 'ack. my baby is still learning. he's dumb.'

[miizpah]

mine | sakusa kiyoomi

anon asks : listen to this!!! being sakusa bimbo wife, ur so fucking beautiful that whenever ur both at social events for vball, there’s always someone coming up and hitting on u. mr sakusa doesn’t like that ::))) and he can’t wait to get home to punish his wife silly and leave marks that will defo show everyone that she’s taken :):):):)

post timeskip ‼️

tw. degrading, consensual roughhousing, a bit of manipulation.

author note : i am simp for sakusa !! this ask for me hyperventilating into orbit. girl, y/n a little too brave in this one, like miss girl gon ahead and sit down we all know who dom here. and not how there’s only a small part of smut in this, yo, i’m sorry it’s not longer but my motivation for this fic went whoosh. and not me being in the middle of changing up my theme 🙄 and struggling at that.

“Omi-”

One second you had been nodding along to a conversation being held by one of the team’s older PRs, the next second you were being guided away by your husband’s tight grip, your wrist exploding in dull pain as all you could do was follow after him. Praying you don’t trip over your satin gown.

You didn’t understand what exactly caused him to snap, he was always respectful and polite when attending events such as these. They were public appearances the entirety of MSBY had to attend, and he was already tittering on the edge becuase of the sheer number of people and crowds. But, he’d never left an event early, and he never blatantly disrespectful to a staff on his team.

The underground parking lot was empty as you both entered, in search for his car. “How dare you let his filthy hands touch you?”

It made sense then, your mind wandering back to the entire conversation. You had been sipping on a glass of wine with Atsumu and Shouyo by your sides, since Kiyoomi tended to stay away from the crowds, you were the one who would mingle around in his stead. Atsumu had promised to keep an eye on you, like always, and by extension, Shouyo gladly tagged along.

Now, you began to understand the glare Atsumu was giving the PR, and the worried looks Shouyo casted over his shoulders. Now, it made complete and total sense. The man had been flirting with you. You hadn’t notice, your mind was a bit clogged up with Kiyoomi and the way his suit fit him too perfectly, you hadn’t even noticed when he had touched your shoulder.

You barely had enough time to register your surroundings before your harshly pressed against his sleek black car, his hand around your throat and his eyes dangerous. The mere look sent bouts of pleasure and fear coiling around your body, and you only tighten your thighs around the knee pressed between you.

“Omi, you’re hurting me,” You whimper softly, pathetically, tears prickling at your eyes.

“I asked you a question, dumb bitch. I expect an answer.” He spat, eyes glaring angrily into yours. His grip tighten a bit, just enough to tease your airway.

“I’m sorry, Omi! I didn’t realize it, I promise!” You cry, hands coming up and grabbing at his arm. He didn’t move for a moment, eyes boring into your watery ones.

He sighed under his mask, loosen his grip. “Hm, you’re right, my little wife never realizes it.” His hand removes from your throat and cards through your hair softly, he kisses your forehead through his mask. “This is why I have to protect you, too dumb and pretty for your own good. You know that, right?”

“Only for you, Omi.” You mutter, wet eyes staring up at him with a doe like express. “Only pretty and dumb for you.”

He smirked, though unseen. “Yes, you are. Come, let’s get you into the car.”

“Ack! Eight, ‘m sorry Omi.” You whimper, trying to keep as still as possible as Kiyoomi rubs almost lovingly at your burning ass cheek. If you’d thought you were getting away for being a little dumb bitch and not noticing that filthy man’s hand on you, you were wrong. Kiyoomi was clear when it came to you, his beautiful ditzy wife, that no one was allowed to touch you. Not unless he’s permitted it.

“N-Nine! ‘m sorry Omi,” your hands clench the bedsheets in a tight grip, eyes squeezing close as the harsh pain spread around your bottom.

“Ah! Ten, ‘m sorry Omi.” You cried out, happy to finally be done with this punishment. You just wanted to shower, take off your makeup, comb through your hair, and sleep. But the moment you both had entered the house, he’d chased you down the hallway and sprayed you over his knees, bunching your expensive satin dress up to your waist and dealt his punishment.

You stood then, dress falling around your bare ass and legs. You couldn’t walk away, not when Kiyoomi’s large hand yanked you forward. “Did I tell you to stand, hm?”

“I wanna shower,” you whine, trying to pull your arm free. But, he only rose a brow at you. The way he looked at you, as if he knew that you didn’t want to shower, sparked a small amount of anger in your veins. And as a serious as you could, you shot him a nasty glare. “Let me go, Kiyoomi. I want to shower.”

“Watch your tone, angel.”

“Not unless you let me go.”

“Oh? Baby trying to argue?”

You huff in annoyance, trying to yanking your arm his tight grip. “Let me go, Sakusa!” You yell angrily, arm finally breaking free and you walked away then, mumbling angrily to yourself.

If there was one thing you’ve never learned when being with Kiyoomi, is to never turn your back on him when fighting. Not only is he going to get angry, but it will lead to some pretty hard fucking, and your ability to walk tomorrow is gone. But, you never learn, you’re a bit dumb, it’s okay. You both get what you want in the end.

You didn’t have enough time to prepare yourself before you find yourself against the bedroom wall, his large hand entangled in your hair, exposing your neck to the wall. “Who do you think you’re talking too, Y/N?”

“I’m talking to Sakusa Kiyoomi, who else?” Brave? No. Smart mouthing? Yes. Is that a good idea? No. Ten out ten would recommend if you’re looking for good sex. But, right now, you were not looking for good sex, right now, you wanted to shower, you wanted to sleep.

“Your mouth is going to get you into some trouble, baby.” His breath was warm against your ear, and you struggled to hold in the shiver of pleasure. “I’m going to ask you again, and you better answer me correctly. Who do you think you’re talking to?”

You swallow, eyes flickering up and meeting his. The defiance in your eyes were clear. “You.”

He chuckled, “my silly little wife.” He backed away, turning you around then. “I can see that you’re not in the playing mood, right now.”

You stare at him in momentary confusion, this was a new reaction. “W-what?”

He looked at you, “what?”

“But, s-sex?”

“You want to shower, no?”

Yes, you wanted to shower. You wanted sleep. Not sex. That’s what your brain wanted of course, your body wanted Kiyoomi. “No...?”

“No?” His smirk widen almost cruelly. “Too bad, I’m not fucking you after that disgusting man touched you.”

“Omi?!”

“What happened to Sakusa?”

“I-I... No, touch me, please!”

He shook his head, backing away and sitting on the bed. “Sorry, I’m not touching you until you shower.”

Why were you complaining? You wanted this. You wanted to shower, not have sex. Why were you practically begging him to fuck you?

Huffing, you nod firmly. “Fine, I’m showering. And we’re not having sex for a month!”

“Ditzy wife.”

“Two months!”

Obviously, Kiyoomi was a man that knew how to get his way. It always his way or the highway. That had been the biggest deal breaker when you first met the man. He was too... much for you. Too clean, too big, and too mean for someone like you. Admittedly, you weren’t the smartest person in the word, you passed high school but wasn’t smart enough to get into college, but that was okay.

Your mother always said that you should be grateful that you were beautiful, you could find yourself a rich man and be taken cared of. That had been exactly what you did, you ound a man, who was rich, who was handsome, and you thought yourself clever enough to play him. You had been wrong. God, he was mean, so mean, and cruel, but he had emotions, and it was rare to see them, but they were there, and he was taking care of you.

It didn’t take long for you to actually fall in love with the man. And him, loving you. Your family hated him, though. He was a famous, professional athletic. Your parents didn’t believe that to be a good enough job. Your mother wanted you to find a rich, old ceo old to marry, cause lord knows you’ll only ever work at a restaurant or club if you had to fend for yourself, that way when he died, and everything was left in your name, you would be rich, and a ceo.

Even you knew it didn’t work that way. You didn’t care that they didn’t like Kiyoomi, you loved him, and he accepted you, as you accepted him, and that was all that mattered.

But, as you said. Kiyoomi was a man who knew how to get what he wanted.

And, right now, he wanted his dumb little wife folded in a mating press as he fucked into you mercilessly. Your mouth stuffed with his fingers, and your legs shaking as the pleasure rack through your body.

Your moans were muffled, and Kiyoomi stared at you in amusement and lust. “My ditzy wife looks so pretty with my fingers done your throat, and your cunt stuffed full of my cock.” He pushed his fingers down further, and you choke, hands gripping at his biceps in a death grip.

He pulled his fingers away, holding your mouth open before leaning down and spitting directly inside your mouth. “Hold it there, whore. You swallow and you’ll get punished.”

His arms formed pillars around you, his cock dragging against your gummy, fluttering walls in quick strokes. “You’re mine, my wife, my whore. No one else’s, you hear me?” You could only nod, eyes fluttering close. “No one is allowed to touch you, fuck your messy little holes but me, got it?” Your moan is muffled.

“Swallow,” he demanded, and you did as told, swallowing and opening your mouth so he could see. “Good girl,” he hummed, quickening his pace.

Your body was covered in marks, ones that had did the moment he jumped into the shower with you. He left them on your neck, your breasts, your tummy, and thighs, he’d even bitten into your wrist. He didn’t plan to stop until all of your limbs had at least two marks on them.

“Ah, ah, ah, ah!” You moan, hands moving to his back and nails scratching shallowly at his skin. “Omi!” With each thrust, you could feel your stomach tightening and your walls fluttering. The pleasure coursed throughout your body rapidly, his warm breath against your cheek causing shivers.

“C-cumming!” You announce sharply, nails digging into his back as your thighs tense. “P-pull out, I’ll make — ngh! — make a mess!”

Kiyoomi didn’t listen, leaning back and hooking his hands underneath your thighs. His eyes zeroed in on your sopping cunt, watching the way you stretch around him. Your warnings about making a mess went through one ear and out there other.

Your moans grew louder, head turning into the pillows to muffle them. You try to close your legs, anything to minimize the forthcoming of your squirting release. But, Kiyoomi’s hand were strong and he held your legs open as you release over him.

Immediately, you feel a sense of dread forcing your high away. Your mouth formed the words, but your throat gave away when a hard pressure was placed there. Opening your eyes, you were met with Kiyoomi’s dark ones, looking at you as if you were the best damn meal he’d ever had.

He pressed a kiss to your cheek, then your lips before uttering, “keep still, angel, I’m doing this again.”

note — i hate this, i hate this, i hate this, i hate this. i’m literally in the middle of trying to change my theme and writing style and i’m throwing up?? pls, anon, don’t hate me, i tried with this. it’s not a long piece of smut bc i didn’t know if u wanted it, :(

#sakusa kiyoomi #sakusa smut #haikyuu smut #haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #✨.requests. #🌚.dirty #sakusa #tw.degradation #tw.manipulation

[peanut-the-goalie]

@heyitssmiller​ newchapternewchapternewchapter

Black, you’re going to make us late

said like an old married couple

“Alright, alright. Coming. Here.” He handed Remus the cup of tea after he’d locked up the apartment and waited for him to take a sip expectantly, all eager gray eyes and puppy-like enthusiasm. Remus let that smile he was holding back slip through the cracks as he brought the cup to his lips. He took a sip, keeping his face carefully neutral.

this section like this paragraph and the next 2 - 3. THIS IS WHY I LOVE YOUR WRITING, I CAN’T NOT READ WITHOUT GRINNING

“Hmm?” He demanded, causing Remus to laugh. “What does hmm mean?”

“It means your tea is shit but I didn’t want to hurt your feelings.”

not me making heart eyes at the screen nope

“Please don’t drink anymore of this, holy shit.” Sirius took the lid off and dumped the contents into a nearby trashcan as they walked quickly in order to escape the bitterly cold morning.

I would advise not to dump liquids into the trash can, but we don't wanna kill the plants do we?

“That’s pretty hard to do when it’s a hot liquid. I’m kind of impressed.”

I want to attempt this now. I want Remus Lupin to be proud of me pls

“Well, I didn’t get my morning tea.” Remus replied, holding the door open for Sirius

sassy remus snarky remus my favourite remus

They hadn’t even shrugged off their coats before Logan was approaching them, a stiff expression on his face.

“We need to talk.”

nonono what what? hnnn are we making leo suffer through this whole story or smth?

Logan didn’t even answer, he just started walking

quiet Logan is the most concerning logan

“I’m requesting a transfer.”

Remus blinked, surprised at the suddenness of the statement. “I’m sorry, what?”

“Is this about that kiss you planted on O’Hara?” Sirius asked with a teasing grin. Logan’s expression shifted from blank to pained in half a second

1) Lo Lo Lo baby noooo

2) frick off sirius

Logan squeezed his eyes shut and exhaled sharply through nose. He seemed more worried about leaving his partners exposed than his transfer being denied. A thought made its way to the forefront of Remus’ mind, making him consider a different angle to why Logan was so upset.

ever loving protective lo

The Snakes were proven to be brutal and merciless and not afraid to start fights. Or finish them. Logan’s partners had never experienced something like that, and there was no way they’d be prepared if one of their missions went south.

what the fuck miller. crY

Leo laughed softly. “Alright there, Finn?” He blinked. “What year is it?”

I love finn

Logan couldn’t help but think he was beautiful even without a lot of rest. His hair was all disheveled, eyes big and sleepy, and voice all low and rough. It would take a hell of a lot to make Finn O’Hara not beautiful.

pining

But first: sleep.

yes sleep first always (i say as im planning on staying but for...more hours ew math)

Make my wish come true, baby all I want for Christmas is you!

Even the Christmas music was mocking him now. That was just perfect. Now if they added the word two to the end of that lyric, it would be spot-on.

mean music

A dark, cold room with only two beds, Logan noticed after he switched on the light.

ohmygodtherewasonlyonetwobeds

I’m just thinking about the unlucky one who has to sleep alone :(

How had this become his life?

The universe loves you, deal with it

“How are my sleeves still too short?”

SLEEVES ARE TALL PEOPLE WORST ENEMIES ack

ALSO LOGAN I JUST.. AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH

“Fight me.” Logan said heatedly, turning to glare at Finn. He stopped short and his gaze turned soft as he watched the redhead adjusting his tie in the mirror, all gorgeous lines and focused face. His tongue stuck out slightly as he tightened the knot of his tie and tried to straighten it.

It was still crooked.

SAY IT WITH ME, PIN-ING

“Your tie’s still crooked.” He said, reaching up to tug at the article of clothing.

Idk whether to yell or say awwwwwwwwwwwww

since the last op.

i’ve just realized op meant operation smh

But Finn was a conman. He literally fooled people for a living. Who was to say that Logan wasn’t just the next mark on a long list?

finn if you fuck with their emotions istg—

Finn sucked in a quick breath beside him. “Oh, Nutty, no.”

this made me smiLE

Finn closed the distance between him and Leo and reached up to ruffle his hair. Leo attempted to swat his hand away with an offended noise. “Harzy, do you know how long it took me to get my hair to look like that?”

Finn: I just wanted to touch his hair okay?

“She taught me how to dance by having me stand on her feet, so I actually learned how to follow before I learned to lead.”

im love. im love im love im love

Finn just pulled him closer, tilting his head up slightly to look at those soft eyes. “Try me, Knut.”

rgjhrflkuhko;iyh

Singing off-key was something Finn never thought he would find endearing, but – well. This was Leo Knut. Pretty much everything he did was endearing

miller aaaaah

Logan moved his gaze away to look at Leo, who was dancing with Regulus. They were pressed closely together, talking quietly. Leo looked completely in his element, which surprised Logan just a little. The normal, jittery movements of a pickpocket were replaced with the graceful, assured motions of a practiced dancer. He made it look as easy as breathing.

wait aw reggie and leo dancing because yayay canon friends change my mind

“Nice grab. I almost didn’t catch it.”

no. damn it reg

“Don’t play dumb. Just give it back and tell me who you’re working for. I promise I won’t kill you, but – well. I’m a Snake, and I do have a reputation to withhold.”

REGULUS, NO

Regulus froze, shoulders tensing. After a long stretch of silence he whispered, voice pained, “He’s alive?”

Remus looked over at the man in question as they listened in and watched his face absolutely crumble. “Reg.”

SAIJFDKHSD;F

June was great – nice, beautiful, whip-smart, and way too good to be messing around with people like the Snakes.

june june june june

A tall, broad man with cold eyes and a feral smile looked back at them

Grayback, it’s grayback isn’t it? fuck you

Sirius wasn’t even listening in anymore as sat next to Remus, forcefully prying Remus’ hand away from where it was gripping his shoulder too tightly and lacing their fingers together while Remus struggled to breathe.

I hate Grayback

Who knew a hug could be so complicated?

I mean they are though. I had my personal space so violated yesterday because my friends kept hugging me and they know I hate hugs unless i initiate them like a weirdo and i didn’t know what to dooo

“Finn, did you just say y’all?” Logan couldn’t see him, but he could hear the delighted smile in Leo’s voice.

Miller is rubbing us on all of us and i love it

The night only got worse when he looked over to the newcomer to face eerie, yellow eyes.

he remind me of a basilisk. Didn’t I name him tinkerbell? Im never going to see tinkerbell normally again, scary lil fairy

[perfecttimeseleven]

PERFECT TIMES ELEVEN EP. 5 TRANSCRIPT

ACT ONE

SCENE NINE

REMINGTON

I can’t believe Jay eats pizza with a fork. I man, I can’t believe we seriously just ate the HP-delivered pizza, either — but there’s just a lot to process here.

(DAISY takes another bite of her slice.)

DAISY

Free pizza’s free pizza, my dude.

REMINGTON

Cheers to that.

(REMINGTON raises her glass of lemonade and clinks it against DAISY’s glass of juice. JAY, feeling a little apologetic, hesitantly raises her glass of milk towards DAISY’s glass, but DAISY puts her glass down, making a face at JAY.)

DAISY

Milk-drinkers need to be oppressed.

JAY

(sipping from her glass of milk, before putting it down)

Our bones are stronger than yours.

DAISY

Hey, uhh, guess what? You’re a cuck.

REMINGTON

(changing the subject)

Um, so you all didn’t find anything outside?

DR. MORELLO

The man you claim to have seen —

REMINGTON

The man I most definitely saw.

DR. MORELLO

— seems to have vanished without a trace.

(pauses)

But now that we’re aware this hypothetical man —

REMINGTON

This very real man —

DR. MORELLO

— knows of our — your whereabouts, we must remain incredibly vigilant.

REMINGTON

Well, is there anything you can tell me about the, ah, bad people? You see, I can’t help but worry a little about...well, anyone going after my life.

DR. MORELLO

All you need to know about the threat is how to keep yourself safe.

DAISY

The classic “keep your doors and windows locked, stay off your phone, don’t talk to strangers who say they’ve stabbed pizza guys” kinda deal.

REMINGTON

Okay, but —

DR. MORELLO

Now, Remington, I’ve been talking with Jay.

REMINGTON

Uh —

DR. MORELLO

She’s already agreed to this, but...essentially, I think it would be beneficial, tomorrow morning, to try to recreate the possession incident from today. Under close guidance, of course. It’s in all ways extraordinary, and I think this soulmate bond holds a lot of mystery and possibility. Tomorrow’s a big day. Accordingly, I want you both to get some sleep as soon as possible. Meaning, now.

REMINGTON

What —

DAISY

Wait, c’mon! I still need to show Remy embarrassing videos of Jay on my phone!

JAY

(splutters, almost choking on her pizza)

The what?

DR. MORELLO

Daisy, go show Remington to her room.

DAISY

Ugh, fine.

(DAISY and REMINGTON get up and exit.)

DR. MORELLO

Take the plates, Daisy.

(DAISY enters.)

DAISY

Ugh, fine.

(DAISY picks up her plate and REMINGTON’s plate, before exiting.)

DR. MORELLO

Jay...

JAY

You’ve gotta be kidding.

(pauses)

Me, too?

DR. MORELLO

Yes.

(With a dramatic rolling of her eyes, JAY grudgingly picks up her plate and exits. DR. MORELLO picks up the now-empty pizza box and his own plate, before exiting the other way.)

ACT ONE

SCENE TEN

REMINGTON

Okay, why the fuck are there so many Jay Mazziottas on Instagram?

(scrolls a bit more)

I give up.

(tosses the phone onto the carpet)

Goodnight!

(then, to herself)

Goodnight!

(REMINGTON puts her phone on the table and turns off the lamp, before crawling into her blankets and falling asleep. Cricket chirps, birdsong, and noises of traffic fill the air. REMINGTON bolts upright in her bed.)

REMINGTON

(looking around)

The fuck kinda dream is this?

HP

Hello, Remington Long!

(REMINGTON turns around, seeing HP)

REMINGTON

(initially shocked)

Ack!

(hopping off the bed)

Hey, sexy printer man! I’m in my jammies!

HP

I see! I am not a fan of the Jeff man on your shirt. Dinosaur man.

REMINGTON

You don’t like Jeff Goldblum? The fuck is wrong with this dream?

(looking around)

Whatever. Uh, I don’t know why we’re in Central Park but let’s not question my subconscious. There’s a bed here and we both know where this dream is going to go so come down here and let’s just get to it.

HP

What?

REMINGTON

(to self)

Shit, are my lucid dream powers not working? Do I need to eat more almonds?

HP

Silly Remington, I am not a figment of your imagination!

REMINGTON

You see, that’s exactly what a figment of my imagination would say.

HP

I’m here to finish our little chit-chat from earlier. Chit-chat fun times. Okay?

REMINGTON

Uh, I’m not supposed to talk to you, figment of imagination or otherwise, all righty? “Perfectionist” is a slur or something, and you’ve stabbed a pizza man, and…yeah. So if this dream isn’t going in the, uh, desirable direction, I’m not too interested. I’m gonna wake up now.

HP

You can’t.

REMINGTON

Watch me!

HP

Silly Remington, I am really here. Don’t you understand that?

(REMINGTON pauses.)

REMINGTON

Well, shit.

(pauses)

Did you make us appear in Central Park too?

HP

No, no, silly, that’s your imagination. As is that scantily clad person in your dream who has been trying to get our attention —

REMINGTON

Is that Jay?

DREAM JAY

(waving)

Yoo-hoo, hot stuff!

REMINGTON

No, no, don’t go —

HP

I’m just crashing your regularly scheduled dream; that’s a thing I can do. And a thing you can too.

REMINGTON

First, huge invasion of my privacy. Wait, what? I can — ?

HP

You can do all sorts of fun shit if you put your mind to it, baby! That’s why Dr. Morello’s scared of you. He wants to lock you up in his cottage forever like his other pets so you never learn shit.

REMINGTON

Okay, but what’s “shit?” And, uh, make this quick.

(furtively looks offstage for DREAM JAY)

I have dream business to attend to.

HP

Anything you put your mind to. You’re an Eleven, Remington. We’re “high numbers”.

(gestures dramatically)

With the imprints of more lifetimes, more history, more knowledge, and more potential.

(There’s a pause. HP freezes in his dramatic gesture, waiting for a response.)

REMINGTON

You’re gonna have to dumb this down a lot more for me, buddy.

HP

Ahh, let’s say every Perfectionist has a little tear in the wall in the back of their mind, okay? And what’s behind that is shiny cool stuff. Well, for high numbers, the tears are wider and more fragile. To get to the shiny cool stuff, you just have to break the wall entirely!

REMINGTON

Uhh, okay. And how do you do that?

HP

You stay away from the kind of old artifacts that keep your voices out.

REMINGTON

You mean, you’ve got no accessory on? You’re just living 24/7 with your voices? Damn. No wonder you’re a little out of it.

HP

Yes! They’re here now, actually. They’re just staying quiet until I need some fancy backing vocals.

REMINGTON

Some what?

HP

Is that bracelet the accessory you use?

REMINGTON

Uh, yeah.

(HP grabs REMINGTON’s wrist, lifting it up and gazing at it. He hisses at the bracelet.)

REMINGTON

You good?

(HP lets go of REMINGTON, suddenly backing up. 9. Welcome to Your Mind.)

HP

THAT THING KILLS THE VOICES, AND ALONG WITH THEM, EVERYTHING ELSE!

IT TRAINS YOUR BRAIN TO MORPH INTO A BUNCH OF JAIL CELLS.

BUT, OF COURSE, THAT BRACELET ISN’T SOMETHING YOU’VE QUESTIONED! OOOH,

BUT IT’S DOING WHAT HIPPIE MOTHERS THINK ANTIDEPRESSANTS DO!

YOU’RE NO ORDINARY HUMAN! YOU’RE A PERFECTIONIST!

SO FORGET ALL THE BULLSHIT YOU’VE BEEN FED BY YOUR LITTLE THERAPIST!

IF YOU OPEN UP TO YOUR SOUL AND DITCH THAT NASTY AND TRAGIC

BRACELET, YOU’LL FIND YOU’VE GOT A TYPE OF ALMOST…MAGIC!

Just like what you thought HP stood for.

(in a terrible fake British accent, with hand motions)

“Harry Potter.”

(suddenly loud)

Yer a wizard, bitch! Ha!

WELCOME TO YOUR MIND, REMINGTON LONG!

JUST GIVE A SHOUT! KNOCK ON THE DOOR! RING THE LITTLE BELL — “DING DONG!”

CAN’T WAIT FOR YOU TO SEE WHAT LIES INSIDE!

CAN’T WAIT FOR YOU TO SEE WHAT LIES THEY HIDE!

OH, WELCOME, WELCOME, WELCOME TO YOUR MIND.

CENTURIES OF LIFETIMES IN THERE! ON THAT, WE CAN AGREE,

BUT MILLENNIUMS OF KNOWLEDGE IS WHAT YOU DON’T YET SEE!

WOULDN’T YOU LIKE TO LEARN TO SET FIRES WITH JUST ONE THOUGHT

(motioning behind him as a tree bursts into flame)

OR TO HOP FROM DREAM TO DREAM? Like now! I’m in your head! Ha!

HP/HP’S VOICES

AREN’T YOU PISSED

HP

THAT NO ONE TELLS YOU ANYTHING AT ALL?

IT’S BECAUSE, WITH A SNAP OF YOUR FINGERS, THEY’LL ALL FALL

AT YOUR KNEES! AND THEY’LL BEG, “OH, PLEASE, LET ME GO!”

YOU’LL LEARN IT’S FUN AS SHIT WHEN YOU CAN JUST TELL ‘EM “NO.”

WELCOME TO YOUR MIND, REMINGTON LONG!

SURE, THE VOICES HURT AT FIRST, BUT “WHAT DOESN’T KILL YOU”…MAKES YOU STRONG!

CAN’T WAIT FOR YOU TO MEET ALL OF YOU!

‘CAUSE WHEN YOU’RE LIKE US, IT’S THE THING TO DO!

OH, WELCOME, WELCOME, WELCOME TO YOUR MIND!

(The ground below HP’s feet starts rising up into the air until he’s a few feet above the ground.)

HP’S VOICES

WELCOME TO YOUR MIND!

HP

STUPID HUMANS CONTROL NOTHING IN THEIR LIVES,

THOUGH THEY MIGHT TRY TO BY BUYING SOME GUNS OR SOME KNIVES.

YOU’VE SPENT YOUR WHOLE LIFE FEELING LIKE A PAWN.

I’VE BEEN THERE TOO, BUT NOW, THIS FEELING IS GONE!

WE’RE MORE THAN HUMAN, SO WHY NOT EMBRACE OUR POWER?

INFLICT THE PAIN YOU FEEL! MAKE THIS YOUR FINEST HOUR!

WHEN YOU’RE IN CONTROL, THERE’S NO VIRTUE OR SIN!

GOD ISN’T REAL, BUT IF HE WAS, WE COULD FIGHT HIM. AND WIN!

(A tree near HP explodes. There’s a chittering noise and a squirrel comes sailing out of the debris. HP catches it with one hand.)

HP

OH, LOOK AT THIS! A SQUIRREL! I CAN MAKE IT EXPLODE!

(throws the squirrel upwards and it explodes in mid-air)

BABY, YOU’VE GOT NO CLUE ALL THE POWER THAT’S STOWED

IN YOUR MIND! YOU WILL FIND WONDER!

(making a bolt of lightning appear behind him, accompanied by a crash of thunder)

LIGHTNING! THUNDER!

TAKE CONTROL AND TAKE A STROLL DOWN YOUR TRUE DESTINED ROAD!

I FIND MOST PROBLEMS TEND TO DISAPPEAR

WHEN I SET THEM ON FIRE!

(making his hands light up with flames)

SO TRY THAT, MY DEAR!

THE PEOPLE AND THE ANIMALS INSIDE YOUR HEAD

CAN AND WILL TEACH YOU EVERYTHING THE WEAKLINGS DREAD!

(jumps down to the ground)

WELCOME TO YOUR MIND, REMINGTON LONG!

WHEN YOU CAN’T TELL GOOD FROM BAD, THAN CAN YOU REALLY DO ANY WRONG?

WELCOME TO YOUR MIND!

WELCOME TO YOUR MIND!

WELCOME TO YOUR MIND, REMINGTON LONG!

HP

Interested? Meet me here.

(HP gives REMINGTON a small piece of paper.)

Until then…try it out!

(HP reaches both hands towards REMINGTON’s wrist.)

REMINGTON

Wait —

(It’s too late. HP’s removed her bracelet and is now holding it in one hand.)

ACT ONE

SCENE ELEVEN

REMINGTON’S VOICES

HARVEST, OCEAN, CREATE, CHANGE, FIGHT, ART, FAMILY, FREEDOM, JOYCE, TRADITION, BIRDS.

(HP runs off, dropping REMINGTON’s bracelet discreetly onto her bed. He exits.)

REMINGTON

(thinking HP took her bracelet)

Shit! Shit! Bitch, you took my bracelet!

REMINGTON’S VOICES

HARVEST, OCEAN, CREATE, CHANGE, FIGHT, ART, FAMILY, FREEDOM, JOYCE, TRADITION, BIRDS.

HARVEST, OCEAN, CREATE, CHANGE, FIGHT, ART, FAMILY, FREEDOM, JOYCE…JOYCE…JOYCE…

REMINGTON

No. No. Not Clara! No!

(Around REMINGTON and his bed, the set starts changing again.)

REMINGTON’S VOICES

JOYCE…JOYCE…JOYCE…JOYCE…JOYCE…

(REMINGTON’s surroundings have faded into the all-too-familiar living room. It’s dimly lit in warm yellow light. DR. MORELLO’s sitting on the couch, alone and typing on a computer he’s rested on his lap.)

REMINGTON

Hey! Dr. Morello!

(DR. MORELLO doesn’t react.)

REMINGTON

Dr. Morello? Can you hear me? Guess not. Huh.

(REMINGTON moves away from DR. MORELLO, inspecting the room. JAY enters.)

REMINGTON

Oh, yeah. Jaaaay! About time!

(REMINGTON approaches her, but JAY doesn’t acknowledge her presence. In fact, she walks right past her.)

REMINGTON

Jay! No! Pay attention to me!

DR. MORELLO

(closing his laptop)

Jay. Couldn’t sleep?

JAY

Nope.

REMINGTON

Uh, hello?

(JAY sits on the couch.)

JAY

This…soulmate thing.

REMINGTON

Oh, shit, they’re gonna talk about me.

JAY

I…don’t know how…

DR. MORELLO

(chuckling)

The girl physically repulses you? That’s understandable.

REMINGTON

Hey! Asshole!

(JAY pauses, standing up. She walks towards the TV.)

JAY

As much as I wish that were it...

(picking up the cover of the Just Dance 3 disc and looking at it)

it’s…leaning towards the opposite, actually.

REMINGTON

Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! It’s a good dream!

JAY

(turning back to face DR. MORELLO)

D’you think this…this all...

(JAY lifts up the disc cover silently. DR. MORELLO exhales.)

DR. MORELLO

(solemnly)

Will be another Mark situation? Jay, what happened back then was not…and never will be…your fault. The only one blaming you for that day is you.

JAY

Who’s blaming myself? I…I don’t blame myself. I blame him.

(tightening her grip on the disc cover, fingers digging into the plastic)

Fucking hate his guts!

REMINGTON

(whispered, to self)

Not the Just Dance 3 disc cover!

(There’s a loud crack of plastic. JAY’s broken the disc cover in her fist. DR. MORELLO sighs and gets up. Slowly, he takes the broken disc cover away from her and sets it down gently next to the TV. Meanwhile, REMINGTON’s making her way around her bed to edge in closer to the conversation.)

DR. MORELLO

Calm down, Jay. Go to bed.

JAY

I’m…it just all feels too familiar. Me. Her. An Eleven.

REMINGTON

(noticing her bracelet on the bed)

Oh my god, is that my bracelet? Thank God.

JAY

I don’t know if I —

#transcript #px11 #perfect times eleven #ep 5 #Remington long #honorary perfectionist #Rupert morello #jay mazziotta #daisy noxx #musical #musicals #podcast #podcasts

[forestsstories]

Diaper Debacle

               Josh did not agree to babysit his elder sister’s one year old daughter, but regardless of that at five p.m. on a Saturday both he and his new husband Derek found themselves accepting a diaper bag and a list of instructions. Derek was already reading by the time Josh swung the door closed, due to being in tech support both men were avid fans of instructions when it came to difficult tasks. And if you have ever babysat a one year old you will know that it is, indeed, a difficult task. “I thought you told her no?” Derek gently chided his blonde lover and kissed his nose as he handed him the list. Josh released a sigh he’d been holding in as he relinquished the baby in order to read. “I did. Three times. She told me I need to have a relationship with my niece, which I might understand if she was even a person yet, but she has no cognitive memory at this stage of development. This is just her wanting a night off to go dancing or… whatever women do.” He scoffed.

“Ah, but research suggests that while they have no memory of events from infanthood they do remember feelings. They remember how particular people made them feel, whether that is safe and loved or uncomfortable. You should have a relationship with your niece. I just don’t see why it has to be on a Saturday night.” The little girl cooed and reached for Derek’s long dangling earring as he countered Josh’s points. “Whatever, the baby is here now… let the fun begin.”

               Josh regretted this flippant attitude mere minutes later when a distinctive scent met his nostrils. “Oh no. No, no, no, no, no. This is your niece, I’m not on diaper detail.” Josh grinned as Derek held the baby out to him as if she were a bomb. “But darling it will be good practice! How hard could it be? We’ll do it together. It’ll be just like fixing a computer.” If you have any practice at both activities you will probably know that babies are nothing like computers, even if both tend to break down for seemingly no reason. Josh however, did not know this, but it would not take long before he learned.

               “Okay, we need a diaper, powder, three wet wipes, organic only, a trash can, and… where is the baby?” Josh looked up from his list of materials to find Derek tiptoeing from the room. “Uh-uh, you’re doing this. Now lay the baby on the towel.”

“On its back or its stomach?” Josh frowned as he perused his sisters written instructions.

“It doesn’t explicitly say, I don’t think it matters. Maybe on its front because I think they sleep on their backs.” Derek nodded.

“That makes sense.” Josh spent a few more minutes fussing over their equipment list while Derek tried to keep a very fussy little girl from crawling off the top of the dresser. “Okay, we’re ready.” Josh grinned triumphantly as he gazed at his well-organized tabletop, Derek simply rolled his eyes as he was still struggling with the fussing baby. “Okay, what’s the first step?”  Josh scanned the page of instructions. “Remove old diaper… that should be easy.” As his fingers tugged on the flaps, attempting to tug the diaper off like a pair of underwear the baby wriggled causing the front to fall open. It would have been comical if it wasn’t followed by a wailing baby as watery feces coated the towel she was laying on. Both men immediately grimaced. “Well… one of us is going to have to clean that up.”

               After a quick clean up job and an impromptu bath for the baby in the sink (which resulted in sopping wet counters and clothing) it was time to tackle the diaper again. Derek cradled the baby in a towel as Josh once again prepared the top of the dresser for the task. “Okay, lay her on the towel… maybe on her back this time.” Carefully Derek laid her down, smiling as she was no longer fussing or shrieking. Babies can be quite charming when they’re smiling, and this one had a particularly cute dimple on her right cheek. “Okay.” He asked. “What’s the next task?” Josh’s face was hidden behind the instruction manual. His voice was slightly muffled. “Is she dry?”

“No.” Derek snarked. “I just spent twenty minutes rubbing her with a towel so she’d still be wet.”

“I’m sorry babe but it’s written right here. Check if she’s dry. If she is she doesn’t need a new diaper.”

“Well that just doesn’t make any sense. What does her skin moisture level have to do with it?”

“I don’t know but it’s right here look!” The baby stared curiously at the two men who were inexplicably fussing over a piece of paper. “Look, whatever, we already threw the old one out so skip ahead. “

“But you can’t skip steps Derek!” Derek sighed exasperatedly.

“But we can’t let her go without a diaper.”

“Well the instructions say…”

“But she could pee on the rug if she doesn’t have a diaper. And I love that rug, it’s gorgeous.”

“I mean, good point.” Josh finally conceded. “So, new diaper then. Right, insert the diaper under her bottom, oh under! So I suppose she did need to be laid on her back all along!”

“Mmm. That should have been specified, we should add an addendum for future diaper changers.” Derek slid the diaper under her. “What ne-eeext??” his thought was interrupted by a tiny fist which grabbed hold of his tie, followed by a tiny giggle when his voice got high and squeaky as she pulled on it. “This is Italian silk! Good baby… Just let it go… Come on now… a little help please?” Josh scanned the paper frantically. “There’s nothing here for what to do if the baby seizes your clothing! How do you get her to let go?!” The baby giggled more as both men’s voices reached new levels of squeaky. Finally the end of the tie touched the bottom of her foot and she let go to shriek in laughter as it tickled. A moments relief was had. A moment’s.

               “I think you’re using too much powder!”

“Well it doesn’t say how much to use!!”

“Yes but I’m pretty sure if the baby starts coughing from the smoke, it’s too much!” They were onto the next step now and a thick coat of powder coated the poor child’s behind as she coughed.

“This isn’t smoke, smoke is only present if there’s fire, this is more like… a cloud.”

“Clouds are only present where there’s water.”

“Well that’s true, but then what is it?” If the child had been old enough to sigh I imagine it would have, as it was it started crying instead. “Great, now she’s crying.” Derek lifted her off the dresser and held her to his chest, cooing at her. “Is your uncle a dumbass? Yes he is. Yes he is.” He rocked gently back and forth while she quieted. Josh snickered. “What?!” Derek’s brow furrowed as he took in the smirk.

“I may be a dumb ass but you’re the one who’s getting baby powder all over your Italian silk tie.”

               The shriek that escaped Derek could only be heard by dogs. It is a miracle the babies eardrums were not damaged and she wasn’t flung from his hands. “T-take her! Ack! I have to change, good god why did you let me do that?” As he fled the room both uncle and niece giggled.

“Well, maybe you’re not so bad… come on.” Josh said “let’s get this diaper on you.”

End of part one

#baby blues #funny #short story #writing #creative writing #comedy #funny baby story #shortstorysunday #short story sunday

[throwingideasatthewall]

The Clone Wars    Senate Murders

          (Season 2 Episode 15)

Ack      ....  So     are     we    going     to    address     the     guy      that    got     killed?      . .      Oh      This   is a new one       . . .         Oh       No       . . .        The        Bab        ies        -      Will       Only    Pro     Long

  Oh good

 [I was worried      I was going to have to pull out  The old   “Amidala kills children,”      Thing,]

   Any way,      That’s            Good        I like        babies not getting         hurt,         [Cute things in      general]    

      Oof           That’s           Not-

     [pretty sure       that’s the            point]

       Whelp

Well I have teased       Amidala pretty       unmercifully,      Regarding       That        Episode,        I do    still give her       a bit of slack          (Age    appropriate)       Because she still    has a chance to        un-feck the situation      [In the       story]

 Least we know    it      isn’t her getting   poison      ed this time,

 Oh,   never     mind,

That actually    did   apparently   help     (slightly)     (in the   unaccountable)        (Slightly           less       toxicity          in         air)

     Smooth

      Hold             Up           Wait,          Wasn’t              Ready           (Sus             Pect-           Ing-       Animation           That       smooth,

      I          think that was      Sa-        tine          -            Good         ref      (erence)          Picking       up        right       where       he      left        off  

   C-3PO

   Nice

  Whelp

-Windows        -

   Okay,        Minor        Issue?

  ?

  Oh it’s a whole bunch of them

   That’s nice-

      Senator            Stonk

“what will the public think   if I don’t want to make child soldiers,?”

     -Boomer

    (Probably)

   “But he wants to know    how very sorry he is,”

    Haha

      That   is the correct tone

  “Sorry-”

   Sorry doesn’t get you anything

   It’s an attempt to control the     narr-     ative

And    nothing else

 (If you screw up just      fix the problem     don’t keep dragging the tox,”

   Votes

  That’s nice

This is a very non-toxic         healthy tea

  (I know he’s kind of assuming authority          here

    But they   seem to be pretty close friends-

   Who are covered under the friend-      ship rules

“ A.k.a. not doing it to a random stranger who doesn’t like it,”

 Good rule

Oh God      It’s        

THAT

fucker..  

   ?

With the line about   convincing     other people of good?

I-

 Nope-

Note; this isn’t an official X

 It’s just a show my venomous   hatred of this guy..

And the episode he   Spawned    from

 Which was the first one to     earn a strike from me...

For normalizing    abuse...

With that in mind I give this episode the benefit of the     doubt...

  Even with that     concerning opening line

  So I will acknowledge I am slightly doubtful

 [not quite   putting on the   SWAT gear,    maybe just     a bat]

With that-     in mind- let’s continue...

... .

Mistakes       ...     

Em-     That at least counts as   one tox

Bring up the previous   things you did wrong     does not fix it

It’s guilt tripping

And an attempt to get the other party to validate   your toxicity

Dude’s      Towing..

Just after a joke   about how sorry doesn’t do anything

I hope the writers can see the irony in that

(Utilize          It)

  Peace         -         Dick

  Ah

   Hey-

[Repeat generations/friends can be friends with older     members,      just      Weird,]         -        Any       ,Way-

  Aight

  Ni’     gh    t’

 Ah- did they skip over to it or they   going?

“exciting isn’t quite the word   I would use,”

Toxic,     authority assuming,     enabling,

Authority assume     is not ok  regardless of what generation you   are

[Dude’s going to be a Traitor,        Isn’t he?

  They focused on him

  Might be actually a good bit of tension    if he didn’t      (Former   Separatist)

Terri-fying

Yeah surrounded by a bunch of toxic boomers   who will   feel free.    To be as doubting       distrustful.    negative     and overall unhelpful

As you allow

And they feel like pushing the   boundary...

Mind

Or-     gana

Dick move

It’s her     personal opinion       -      and it ain’t   tox?

People can have   dislikes

Not like she called you an   Overinvolved boomer       —        or held you to any   accountability       (Yet)          ...    

 Who order-

[This is getting really     tox

and I don’t trust the   writers           ✖️ Just   putting      it     over        there         in       case      I need it           .....

 Hm

 You

 ..  [Grooming        isn’t cool

 Self deprecation       isn’t either]

  Aight

  Hm

 Also there’s a process you need to go to to speak?

Money doesn’t   matter -

Killing    -      and     hatred      but       the   pacifistic        bitch        vilified

*Spoken   in  complement

She kicked     ASS   last episode

*sorry   for the vulgarity       I’m excited      . .       Also,    so is this     Padme’s episode.

 Cause        Neat.

 Good

 But are votes   casted by     clapping?

(I’m not sure)

 Okay

  Whelp

That’s     either a bad guy       or damn good red   herring

I’m intrigued

Also, whatever happened to     Clovis?

Like,      he still a        senator?

He get   kicked?

Uhm

Dude,

 False   appreciation

Also yeah     what was with that dude       earlier?

[Uncle what’s his name apologize to him for Padme’s comment despite Uncle what’s his name being the one who made it, implying dude took a serious issue with it,]

Also,   Oo, is this working of the previous quote about the line between friends and foes being blurred.

              [I like                  consistency]

So it has to be one of those guys,

The ones in the   room with her,

I’m putting a guess on   Senator-

 The one uncle       what’s- his-name         apologized to

      That guy

[Or it could be that guy that]

No actually he’s probably   abstain        ed for that reason

Sorry      I’m getting ahead          -     But it does say     “Murder,”

   And        I      am    curious        .     Really   going   over       -         Also    why   is that guy   bowing?

[Tran-slation?]

Right        .        obvious     villain       .

 Also   light bullshit..

There’s no-   way guy could’ve made it over there

The thing is still in session

We saw him less than a    minute ago

 And she just came in directly

[He’d be         halfway down the hallway]

For likely scope

Yeah, this dude is totally a     Red     Herring       -        He’s    way    too    over     the     top       ...    I’m putting my bets      On that human Senator          Guy           .       CHILD SOLDIERS      ARE BAD!       [sorry I just   felt the need to say that,]

  Okay,    Uncle-what’s his name-

Other person

 That guy-

  Drink      -ing!

  Nice

  Vi-ctory

   Oh, this looks like a problem

    Child groomers          In-       corporate-

    Off

Second Red herring!

(It’s that guy   and I’m sticking with        it)

  Private

  Yeah,  like how did he even get into the room without a key card?

  I know Amidala’s a senator and      by that,               A public      servant,         But you figure if they’re bringing out the    alcohol, they’d shut the door

   -Declare      off hours

  -For the celeb     ration-

 Separatist      Con        Spiracy-

   She has a     point-

   You did a     hundred percent enable his behavior

    (No argument            there)

      Pro- separatist

Ah, uncle back stabber there would contradict you

   Not sure if you’re the same species

But,       you do know about his bullshit,

Don’t assume accountability       free snarking             Territory           (They’re all enablers so I’m not even going to bother with the math,      About who screwed up more,          All the   elders   here are held to the same standard,       About,

 Uncle Backstabber a little more

   *Since I know what he did,

Account

From the most bastard,       of the group,

Who’s the next Red herring?

It’s that dude     I swear      Soon

Yeah child soldiering is a bitch

As is enabling

But she has no idea what’s going to happen     being the past.

Dick,    whelp,

Poor       Frita       (I think)

He’s going       he’s going to get roped into this too     isn’t he?

      “ We you must be doing something right,”

Nah,  enabling abusers  never a good idea

   But then again there’s no rules for dealing with trauma individuals because they aren’t supposed to be any

   How long that takes and what it entails

   Is down to who ever is        asserting accountability     (Excluding      the actual accountability, cutting      Them off)

That’s unnegotiable

(And it can’t involve   death)

Too.     harsh-

No you haven’t-

Well, yeah

But that’s     accessory at best     ... Ono you’ve done a wonderful job

No he hasn’t

Don’t coddle   the abuser

 He’s screwed up pretty consistently

 Pretty sure       it’s more than five

And was leading to let the future get     hecked         ...

 Very       Likely

He wasn’t hurt

The other lady   spent a lot more time defending

She should get the ‘don’t listen to them’

If anything just    ‘reflect the bitch’          (Neutral)          Aight    

     Too          Late!

      Can someone stop      playing the sad music?

      This isn’t sad

     And you can’t make me       sympathize for the abuser

   (I- don’t trust this     writer)

    That Dude sus

    Aight

  Faker-

He’s dying you        dumb ass

(Having a      heart attack       probably

  All the stress            of denial)

   Whelp

Call!

 Please

 Whelp

 -Oh wait      bitch is dead?

Uhm.

DING DONG THE WITCH IS DEAD  the WICKED WITCH IS DEAD!    

 (I know that seems really harsh-           ��But dude- deserved it

And I never have to deal with that character        anymore!

So,

 Al-      right       the      funeral;

 Um,

DING DONG THE WITCH IS DEAD  the WICKED WITCH IS DEAD!

 (I’m sorry I really hated that      character-)

* In reality      the loss of life is a very serious thing and      I don’t mean to make light of it

 But no one is required      to feel sad about their abusers-         Nor toxic individuals        Nor anyone else        Yes the loss of life is a     serious thing           But it should not             And could not         control a person’s life

I’ve always played accountability    over death          Or death   penalty           ...

“...was is a flawed man,”

  He tried to sell someone into   slavery...

  The fact that Amidala was an adult           and could get out of the situation           Doesn’t forgive        how terrible that situation was.

    Un-healthy           And        Wrong

   “Own    mistakes”

 And he tried to guilt trip everyone       into giving him validation

    Specifically           Amidala

      Every        occasion

    [Also      flawed          Some          one        breaking            the           code           once             or           twice,           (Under            five)            Is        flawed,

       This         dude          tox,  

       He should’ve been sentenced     to      accountability along time ago

    For trying to make the world      a generally terrible place for someone

    Multiple times-

  That’s not okay

   [and he clearly         didn’t learn his lesson]

    [Note; whether a person “learned their lesson” or not,            Is irrelevant

   [They already    knew the rules before]

But he never compromised his principles-

    HaHAha,

    What?

That’s because   dude didn’t have any principles

He broke them long before,

Also why the frick does Master Yoda care?

Dude    was          a      politic,

 The     Fuck,

He engaging this propaganda?

Why?

Why does he care about any of this.

Why does   ANY     one

[Satine, alright, hermen got murdered and she might be looking for evidence on who-done-it   That’s fair

?

Oh says it’s an everyone event

That makes sense

Guessing the Jedi are required   to come or else the branded as that asshole

Fair

 Eyes

Aight

What-      ever-

   ?

Why the guard?

Like cultural customs

Aren’t honor guards          for veterans      (And possibly extremely         high positions,      Like         Chancellor?

As technical commander of the army?

Like,      Explain?

That guy-

 Sus

 Very       Sus-

   Pas-         sed

    I’d say      to find his killer

     But yeah I can’t really   blame anyone for not    caring that much     about that dude

   Specifically      Amidala

(Though     accountability law..

   D

   Frita is honestly my favorite        character

   I don’t know       why.

     Possibly his relation to the           chancellor and how      he still a good natured guy,

     Aight

     Yeah     he was a dick,

Hope those aren’t memories     [also        totally the        Kamooin               B-            Right?

                    [Like                         I’m totally still after                          Dude, ]

But she’s   the only one that     touched the bottle]

That we saw?

Dude did suggest it

      Still        heavily          sussing              him                .          No           Face               .              Also       is that his wife?

     (Don’t think it was         ever established)

     I-

    Mentor

     ?

   How old is this person?

I’m gonna assume     adult

 So.

He toxically asserted   authority over me.

Or wrong choice of words and they meant like     “best friend”

 Cause that’s kind of     tox,

Me?

  - -

  This is     getting       Hella          tox

    You’re       a      person

    Yeah you might miss him   and that’s totally fine

     But-

You’re still a person completely able to   self determine.

   ‘ take his place,’

   Oh no

   Oh no

   Shit

   Just what she needs         overinvolvement 

   Right

   Not        threatening at all    

    Oh         Red           .         We        never       see      them      enter            .         Right            .            Well this turned from a private party     to a    Conference

   I thought he was just calling    to offer condolences.

   Questions.

Oh,    Did you not tell the loud ones what happened to their loved one?

  (Like normally I’m all for no one should      witness anyone else’s death          Or that news be public

   But this is assumed authority.         And that stuff is pretty normal

     Regardless       of how terrible.       Senator Fa

This guy seems like a drip

[Guessing that’s the reason why       Amidala is going to end up taking charge,]

Because      the Chancellor     hired a sham detector    Whelp

   Dick way to put it

  True, the protocol for murder          isn’t cutting and clear

   Dragging random people into it, isn’t

   You see it          you’re        immediately accountable,

      (Only by view of the body,          Not by word of mouth)

Because this kind of approach is super          in-effective,

  Whelp        Great

  Also there were thousands of       senators in that building that could screw up the thing

Only five

(I’ll give the        murder        mystery            It’s             Dues,           And           let it          continue,             But       (im-probabilit-           ies is not a good thing)

        Might              Want                    To                  Avoid

(Also     if that’s the     qualification;       I’m sussing         Amidala,          Dude      was                 a           dick           to          her)

    THOUGH              I’M STILL-         SUSS      -ING           DUDE       IN           Blue?     dude with the    beard

   That      one.

   Build-ing    <—-    He          Sus

   Him

—-

 Ha!

Here

Hey   that was almost emotion,      Nice

(also, dang how frequent are   murders?

Him

<—-

  He          Sus

   He didn’t take a seat         like everyone else

   [Also, it was purple    Dude wearing purple     that’s who I’m talking about]

Also are you going to introduce him as the     detective ?

‘cause you’re kind of   screwing with these people

Not   telling them what’s going on

Answering in vague Snark

Him.    ...

For no reason

Considering he was an uncountable toxic frick who allowed it lots of people to get hurt-

  I’m       mad,

 A ight

Right..

 And

Okay, He’s got a point

Immediate accountability     is the case murder     for good reason

Surprised they didn’t start       this right after the     murder

When it happened

Dude- [i’m not going to criticize       the spatial awareness]

Him

<—-

 Right         there

  Murder

A good point since     they really haven’t explained anything?

   Okay,         Right

Or anyone     stealthy

  Though yeah I guess    politicians

  [just don’t like the        generalization]

   Someone good        With he rbs..

  Okay.

  Neat.

  Insult.

Poor.   Frita

  He didn’t deserve     this,

(Well yeah he’s an enabler,)

But       He’s the least toxic..

[Also poor Frita,       Always       getting sucked into these mysteries

   He’s the shaggy        of this damn group

   [Likes food          and hanging out with people,          Gets dragged into      bullshit,

 Rip

Insulting     the whole damn room             .....            This character is                 obnoxious

            But in a fun way

             The narr              -atives-            clearly having fun

Ono        yeah       he   was    an   open   dick

  [Seriously they’re treating him    like-]

  ?

 No it couldn’t possibly be because he was an       ex separatist,

Open book         Case,

Con-troversial

 Politicians      arguing over basic human decency

   And common sense

    ‘Do we really.. Ok        that’s enough politic jokes

   The movie started it         so I had to finish it.

  Now on with.

      Dude drunk

     Dick

  “ I’m        totally-”

 Um, this is     delicious corruption

How long until     Amidala figures what’s going on?

  Whelp

He just     left?

   He really is a       quack

    Did you find him         on       fakedetectives.com?

     Palpatine?

    Crud

    Okay,

    That guy,

    Target

   Good

  Aight

Also it’s that guy     Authority ass-     umer sus,

  No       No,

Good plan

Ono

  Good      plan

  Evil.

  Aight

    .

  Good

In-vestigation

   Yes-       Good

    Let’s           Do           It           ...

    It’s that guy

    Him

He     -a dick

Also not to claim authority over   him

Not, not to be     cu-     rious-    -

No-pe

Authority   figures     don’t 

 He was an ass

Also yeah just     put   all the possible suspects in the room      -         That       Guy

Uhm

Ty-pho

Agana!

  That       fricker

   Onu          looked         at him         before         his death                 -             He came back last       to the party-

       He was the first             to suggest opening the drinks             -              Also the thing with the detective       and him just trying to get over as quickly as possible

        He sus,  

Aight,   

Right,       -       Don’t - get stabbed

Um-

Aight

Wha-

 Ha, such a red         herring-

 Okay-

Oh, Red herring        Co-nference

  Didn’t notice the     snake lady          (Kamoin)     Empty     Chair       -        Also     they know each other?

  Good,        evil for them,

  Fair

 Aight

Also yeah the         boomers here didn’t do it       -         More     likely someone from the Present     Gen.. . 

Theory

That      Guy..

Guy’s like damn

Like just give her your time and your place and       your alibi.

Whelp,       Aight

So I’m pretty sure if I had paid attention to the     bottles,        That wouldn’t have   matched up       ...

Yeah he was a separatist

              DAMN

    Like I saw the hand on the dock            But I thought it was an assassin        or team up

                But  

                 DAMN

                               I feel                                   verified

              Until it played music                       victory music                         Over the arrest                       of a distressed                        and less toxic                            person

*While   painting      the      toxic     person           as a        saint

                  Which I cannot                          condone

         As such;

                  it earns my most                             regretful                              strike;

Official;

   For attempting to     excuse a toxic       person’s          actions

* I want to emphasize that this is not ok, a person does not get off for un- accountable actions, simply by apologizing, never mind the fact          - that it is an attempt    to guilt-trip       Invalidate          And      Gas-    light               The       Recipient,       But also should not apply to someone that has repeatedly attempt to Gaslight, guilt trip and sell a person into slavery;         (Crossing more than five accounts)

[never mind the selectivi       ty of what it is applied        “Ano” getting away         With slavery, be        -cause he        Was “So-      rry,” gun        held to      (-near)        his       Back      While      Lolo       doesn’t     just   mummer      sorry)

         That once you commit harm              against another person.. it can                not be taken back, the victim       owes you no sympathy, no    right to their emotions, and        certainly, no un      accountability-       Forgive      Ness-      From what you have done.

   You must live with what you have        commit

   Regard        Less

[lindafrancois]

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

“Why is my eye twitching?!”

It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.

It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.

And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:

“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.

“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!

“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”

They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.

Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!

Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.

What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. To salsa music. While setting off fireworks.

The days where this happens are shitty.

And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.

I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!

I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.

And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.

At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”

I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.

In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:

“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.

Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.

These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.

And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!

#1) GET AN EARLY WIN

For me, the best early win? Making my bed.

When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.

I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.

Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.

WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.

Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”

Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!

If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!

#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX

At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.

Wait, that came out wrong.

Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”

But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.

And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.

Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:

So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.

Oh, and the big one:

I floss.

Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”

RIP Mitch.

But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”

I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.

That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.

WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.

Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.

#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO

I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.

Mostly hate.

Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.

So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.

It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.

So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:

WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.

Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.

#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL

When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.

Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.

Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.

So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?

Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:

10 push-ups

10 lunges

10-minute walk

I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”

This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.

WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.

Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.

If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.

#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING

There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.

It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.

I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:

Busy is a choice.

It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.

And then I do three things:

Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.

Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.

Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.

Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.

Progress and momentum for the win!

Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”

Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”

As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.

WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.

And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.

No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.

It took 2 freakin’ minutes.

This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!

#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!

The past: I can’t change it!

The future: It hasn’t happened yet!

Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.

This is suboptimal.

So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”

(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)

Cool? Cool.

5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.

I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.

But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.

WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.

#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE

Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:

I consumed more than I created.

For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.

The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.

So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.

I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:

Television

Video games

Social media

Outrage news stories

Takeout

Books

In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.

If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.

I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.

JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.

And that means less consumption, more production and creation!

Writing and creating content, like this article

Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)

Cooking my own meal at home

Creating art, doodling, drawing

Creating conversation with friends

WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!

#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT

When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.

It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”

And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!

So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:

I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.

I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).

I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.

I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!

I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.

I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”

We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide to Mental Health, and if this is something you’re interested in please consider it!

Note: if you really struggle with depression/anxiety, speaking with a mental health professional could be a game-changing experience. Please do so as soon as you can!

WHY THIS WORKS: I used to be afraid to ask for help, assuming I had to know all the answers on my own. Or that people relied on me to be the happy-go-lucky person and I wasn’t allowed to be unhappy or stressed. And then I grew up.

Now I have no problem asking for help, saying “I don’t know” even if it makes me feel foolish, and I get to a solution MUCH faster!

I know with everything being online these days, it’s easy to spend a lot of time being friendly but not having actual deep conversations with people. This is something I have to work really hard on, as I’d much rather sit at home alone with a book all day and avoid people.

And yet, in most instances, when I’m with friends or loved ones, my day gets much better as a result. And thus, I prioritize saying YES. (Just not too much, so we don’t overload Future Steve.)

Overwhelmed? Do these 8 Things

Okay! This is my 8-step kickstart kickass strategy to dealing with overwhelm and anxiety.

Feel free to hijack these 8 things and the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, take these steps to get unstuck and back on track:

Get an early win

Quick hygiene fix

Watch a 5-minute motivational video

Do the 10-10-10 Protocol

Do the Very Next Thing

Breathe, idiot!

Consume less, produce more

Ask for help

Break this list in case of emergency! Write these down, print it out, design your own checklist and share it with me so I can add it here to the post, whatever you want to do!

You can do this!

I’d love to hear from you: how do you manage overwhelm, and what are the steps you take to get out of that mental quicksand?!

Leave a comment below!

-Steve

PS: This week’s Rebel Hero: Nick T: rocking his new NF Battle Gear!

I can only assume he worked out so hard and flexed so perfectly that he blew the sleeves right off of it 🙂 Nick has been a super supportive member of our community for years and I’m damn glad he’s here.

Want to be the next Rebel Hero? Take a photo of you doing something epic in your NF battle gear, tag us on Instagram with #NerdFitness #battlegear, or email us at [email protected]!

PHOTO SOURCES: All amazing LEGO photos are from Black Zack, whose photos are here on Flickr.

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck. published first on https://dietariouspage.tumblr.com/

[almajonesnjna]

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

“Why is my eye twitching?!”

It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.

It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.

And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:

“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.

“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!

“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”

They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.

Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!

Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.

What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. Out of rhythm. While setting off fireworks.

The days where this happens are shitty.

And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.

I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!

I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.

And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.

At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”

I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.

In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:

“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.

Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.

These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.

And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!

#1) GET AN EARLY WIN

For me, the best early win? Making my bed.

When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.

I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.

Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.

WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.

Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”

Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!

If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!

#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX

At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.

Wait, that came out wrong.

Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”

But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.

And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.

Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:

So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.

Oh, and the big one:

I floss.

Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”

RIP Mitch.

But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”

I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.

That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.

WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.

Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.

#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO

I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.

Mostly hate.

Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.

So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.

It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.

So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:

WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.

Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.

#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL

When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.

Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.

Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.

So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?

Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:

10 push-ups

10 lunges

10-minute walk

I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”

This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.

WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.

Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.

If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.

#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING

There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.

It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.

I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:

Busy is a choice.

It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.

And then I do three things:

Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.

Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.

Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.

Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.

Progress and momentum for the win!

Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”

Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”

As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.

WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.

And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.

No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.

It took 2 freakin’ minutes.

This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!

#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!

The past: I can’t change it!

The future: It hasn’t happened yet!

Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.

This is suboptimal.

So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”

(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)

Cool? Cool.

5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.

I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.

But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.

WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.

#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE

Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:

I consumed more than I created.

For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.

The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.

So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.

I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:

Television

Video games

Social media

Outrage news stories

Takeout

Books

In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.

If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.

I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.

JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.

And that means less consumption, more production and creation!

Writing and creating content, like this article

Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)

Cooking my own meal at home

Creating art, doodling, drawing

Creating conversation with friends

WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!

#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT

When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.

It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”

And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!

So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:

I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.

I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).

I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.

I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!

I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.

I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”

We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide..

https://ift.tt/2GBwV7u

#Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

[joshuabradleyn]

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

“Why is my eye twitching?!”

It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.

It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.

And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:

“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.

“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!

“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”

They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.

Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!

Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.

What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. Out of rhythm. While setting off fireworks.

The days where this happens are shitty.

And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.

I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!

I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.

And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.

At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”

I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.

In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:

“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.

Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.

These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.

And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!

#1) GET AN EARLY WIN

For me, the best early win? Making my bed.

When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.

I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.

Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.

WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.

Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”

Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!

If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!

#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX

At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.

Wait, that came out wrong.

Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”

But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.

And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.

Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:

So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.

Oh, and the big one:

I floss.

Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”

RIP Mitch.

But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”

I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.

That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.

WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.

Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.

#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO

I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.

Mostly hate.

Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.

So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.

It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.

So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:

WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.

Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.

#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL

When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.

Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.

Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.

So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?

Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:

10 push-ups

10 lunges

10-minute walk

I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”

This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.

WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.

Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.

If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.

#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING

There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.

It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.

I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:

Busy is a choice.

It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.

And then I do three things:

Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.

Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.

Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.

Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.

Progress and momentum for the win!

Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”

Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”

As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.

WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.

And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.

No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.

It took 2 freakin’ minutes.

This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!

#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!

The past: I can’t change it!

The future: It hasn’t happened yet!

Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.

This is suboptimal.

So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”

(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)

Cool? Cool.

5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.

I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.

But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.

WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.

#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE

Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:

I consumed more than I created.

For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.

The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.

So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.

I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:

Television

Video games

Social media

Outrage news stories

Takeout

Books

In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.

If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.

I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.

JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.

And that means less consumption, more production and creation!

Writing and creating content, like this article

Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)

Cooking my own meal at home

Creating art, doodling, drawing

Creating conversation with friends

WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!

#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT

When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.

It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”

And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!

So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:

I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.

I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).

I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.

I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!

I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.

I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”

We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide..

https://ift.tt/2GBwV7u

#Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

[johnclapperne]

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

“Why is my eye twitching?!”

It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.

It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.

And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:

“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.

“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!

“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”

They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.

Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!

Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.

What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. Out of rhythm. While setting off fireworks.

The days where this happens are shitty.

And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.

I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!

I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.

And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.

At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”

I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.

In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:

“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.

Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.

These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.

And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!

#1) GET AN EARLY WIN

For me, the best early win? Making my bed.

When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.

I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.

Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.

WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.

Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”

Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!

If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!

#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX

At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.

Wait, that came out wrong.

Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”

But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.

And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.

Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:

So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.

Oh, and the big one:

I floss.

Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”

RIP Mitch.

But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”

I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.

That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.

WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.

Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.

#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO

I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.

Mostly hate.

Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.

So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.

It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.

So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:

WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.

Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.

#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL

When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.

Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.

Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.

So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?

Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:

10 push-ups

10 lunges

10-minute walk

I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”

This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.

WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.

Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.

If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.

#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING

There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.

It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.

I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:

Busy is a choice.

It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.

And then I do three things:

Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.

Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.

Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.

Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.

Progress and momentum for the win!

Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”

Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”

As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.

WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.

And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.

No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.

It took 2 freakin’ minutes.

This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!

#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!

The past: I can’t change it!

The future: It hasn’t happened yet!

Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.

This is suboptimal.

So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”

(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)

Cool? Cool.

5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.

I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.

But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.

WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.

#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE

Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:

I consumed more than I created.

For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.

The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.

So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.

I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:

Television

Video games

Social media

Outrage news stories

Takeout

Books

In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.

If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.

I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.

JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.

And that means less consumption, more production and creation!

Writing and creating content, like this article

Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)

Cooking my own meal at home

Creating art, doodling, drawing

Creating conversation with friends

WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!

#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT

When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.

It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”

And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!

So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:

I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.

I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).

I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.

I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!

I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.

I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”

We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide..

https://ift.tt/2GBwV7u

#Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

[albertcaldwellne]

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

“Why is my eye twitching?!”

It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.

It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.

And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:

“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.

“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!

“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”

They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.

Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!

Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.

What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. Out of rhythm. While setting off fireworks.

The days where this happens are shitty.

And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.

I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!

I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.

And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.

At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”

I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.

In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:

“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.

Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.

These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.

And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!

#1) GET AN EARLY WIN

For me, the best early win? Making my bed.

When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.

I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.

Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.

WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.

Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”

Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!

If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!

#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX

At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.

Wait, that came out wrong.

Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”

But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.

And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.

Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:

So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.

Oh, and the big one:

I floss.

Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”

RIP Mitch.

But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”

I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.

That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.

WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.

Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.

#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO

I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.

Mostly hate.

Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.

So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.

It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.

So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:

WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.

Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.

#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL

When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.

Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.

Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.

So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?

Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:

10 push-ups

10 lunges

10-minute walk

I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”

This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.

WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.

Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.

If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.

#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING

There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.

It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.

I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:

Busy is a choice.

It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.

And then I do three things:

Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.

Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.

Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.

Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.

Progress and momentum for the win!

Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”

Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”

As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.

WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.

And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.

No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.

It took 2 freakin’ minutes.

This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!

#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!

The past: I can’t change it!

The future: It hasn’t happened yet!

Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.

This is suboptimal.

So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”

(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)

Cool? Cool.

5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.

I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.

But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.

WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.

#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE

Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:

I consumed more than I created.

For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.

The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.

So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.

I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:

Television

Video games

Social media

Outrage news stories

Takeout

Books

In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.

If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.

I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.

JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.

And that means less consumption, more production and creation!

Writing and creating content, like this article

Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)

Cooking my own meal at home

Creating art, doodling, drawing

Creating conversation with friends

WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!

#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT

When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.

It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”

And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!

So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:

I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.

I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).

I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.

I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!

I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.

I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”

We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide..

https://ift.tt/2GBwV7u

#Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

[kiaradnoblesus]

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

“Why is my eye twitching?!”

It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.

It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.

And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:

“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.

“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!

“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”

They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.

Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!

Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.

What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. To salsa music. While setting off fireworks.

The days where this happens are shitty.

And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.

I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!

I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.

And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.

At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”

I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.

In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:

“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.

Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.

These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.

And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!

#1) GET AN EARLY WIN

For me, the best early win? Making my bed.

When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.

I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.

Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.

WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.

Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”

Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!

If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!

#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX

At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.

Wait, that came out wrong.

Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”

But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.

And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.

Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:

So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.

Oh, and the big one:

I floss.

Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”

RIP Mitch.

But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”

I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.

That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.

WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.

Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.

#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO

I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.

Mostly hate.

Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.

So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.

It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.

So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:

WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.

Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.

#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL

When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.

Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.

Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.

So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?

Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:

10 push-ups

10 lunges

10-minute walk

I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”

This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.

WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.

Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.

If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.

#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING

There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.

It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.

I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:

Busy is a choice.

It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.

And then I do three things:

Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.

Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.

Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.

Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.

Progress and momentum for the win!

Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”

Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”

As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.

WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.

And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.

No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.

It took 2 freakin’ minutes.

This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!

#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!

The past: I can’t change it!

The future: It hasn’t happened yet!

Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.

This is suboptimal.

So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”

(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)

Cool? Cool.

5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.

I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.

But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.

WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.

#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE

Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:

I consumed more than I created.

For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.

The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.

So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.

I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:

Television

Video games

Social media

Outrage news stories

Takeout

Books

In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.

If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.

I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.

JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.

And that means less consumption, more production and creation!

Writing and creating content, like this article

Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)

Cooking my own meal at home

Creating art, doodling, drawing

Creating conversation with friends

WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!

#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT

When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.

It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”

And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!

So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:

I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.

I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).

I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.

I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!

I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.

I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”

We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide to Mental Health, and if this is something you’re interested in please consider it!

Note: if you really struggle with depression/anxiety, speaking with a mental health professional could be a game-changing experience. Please do so as soon as you can!

WHY THIS WORKS: I used to be afraid to ask for help, assuming I had to know all the answers on my own. Or that people relied on me to be the happy-go-lucky person and I wasn’t allowed to be unhappy or stressed. And then I grew up.

Now I have no problem asking for help, saying “I don’t know” even if it makes me feel foolish, and I get to a solution MUCH faster!

I know with everything being online these days, it’s easy to spend a lot of time being friendly but not having actual deep conversations with people. This is something I have to work really hard on, as I’d much rather sit at home alone with a book all day and avoid people.

And yet, in most instances, when I’m with friends or loved ones, my day gets much better as a result. And thus, I prioritize saying YES. (Just not too much, so we don’t overload Future Steve.)

Overwhelmed? Do these 8 Things

Okay! This is my 8-step kickstart kickass strategy to dealing with overwhelm and anxiety.

Feel free to hijack these 8 things and the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, take these steps to get unstuck and back on track:

Get an early win

Quick hygiene fix

Watch a 5-minute motivational video

Do the 10-10-10 Protocol

Do the Very Next Thing

Breathe, idiot!

Consume less, produce more

Ask for help

Break this list in case of emergency! Write these down, print it out, design your own checklist and share it with me so I can add it here to the post, whatever you want to do!

You can do this!

I’d love to hear from you: how do you manage overwhelm, and what are the steps you take to get out of that mental quicksand?!

Leave a comment below!

-Steve

PS: This week’s Rebel Hero: Nick T: rocking his new NF Battle Gear!

I can only assume he worked out so hard and flexed so perfectly that he blew the sleeves right off of it 🙂 Nick has been a super supportive member of our community for years and I’m damn glad he’s here.

Want to be the next Rebel Hero? Take a photo of you doing something epic in your NF battle gear, tag us on Instagram with #NerdFitness #battlegear, or email us at [email protected]!

PHOTO SOURCES: All amazing LEGO photos are from Black Zack, whose photos are here on Flickr.

from Fitness News By James https://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/overwhelmed-anxious-how-to-get-unstuck/

[fitnetpro]

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

“Why is my eye twitching?!”

It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.

It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.

And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:

“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.

“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!

“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”

They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.

Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!

Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.

What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. Out of rhythm. While setting off fireworks.

The days where this happens are shitty.

And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.

I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!

I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.

And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.

At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”

I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.

In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:

“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.

Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.

These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.

And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!

#1) GET AN EARLY WIN

For me, the best early win? Making my bed.

When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.

I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.

Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.

WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.

Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”

Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!

If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!

#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX

At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.

Wait, that came out wrong.

Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”

But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.

And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.

Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:

So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.

Oh, and the big one:

I floss.

Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”

RIP Mitch.

But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”

I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.

That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.

WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.

Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.

#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO

I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.

Mostly hate.

Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.

So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.

It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.

So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:

WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.

Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.

#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL

When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.

Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.

Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.

So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?

Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:

10 push-ups

10 lunges

10-minute walk

I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”

This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.

WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.

Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.

If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.

#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING

There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.

It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.

I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:

Busy is a choice.

It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.

And then I do three things:

Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.

Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.

Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.

Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.

Progress and momentum for the win!

Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”

Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”

As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.

WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.

And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.

No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.

It took 2 freakin’ minutes.

This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!

#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!

The past: I can’t change it!

The future: It hasn’t happened yet!

Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.

This is suboptimal.

So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”

(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)

Cool? Cool.

5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.

I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.

But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.

WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.

#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE

Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:

I consumed more than I created.

For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.

The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.

So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.

I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:

Television

Video games

Social media

Outrage news stories

Takeout

Books

In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.

If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.

I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.

JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.

And that means less consumption, more production and creation!

Writing and creating content, like this article

Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)

Cooking my own meal at home

Creating art, doodling, drawing

Creating conversation with friends

WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!

#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT

When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.

It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”

And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!

So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:

I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.

I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).

I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.

I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!

I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.

I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”

We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide to Mental Health, and if this is something you’re interested in please consider it!

Note: if you really struggle with depression/anxiety, speaking with a mental health professional could be a game-changing experience. Please do so as soon as you can!

WHY THIS WORKS: I used to be afraid to ask for help, assuming I had to know all the answers on my own. Or that people relied on me to be the happy-go-lucky person and I wasn’t allowed to be unhappy or stressed. And then I grew up.

Now I have no problem asking for help, saying “I don’t know” even if it makes me feel foolish, and I get to a solution MUCH faster!

I know with everything being online these days, it’s easy to spend a lot of time being friendly but not having actual deep conversations with people. This is something I have to work really hard on, as I’d much rather sit at home alone with a book all day and avoid people.

And yet, in most instances, when I’m with friends or loved ones, my day gets much better as a result. And thus, I prioritize saying YES. (Just not too much, so we don’t overload Future Steve.)

Overwhelmed? Do these 8 Things

Okay! This is my 8-step kickstart kickass strategy to dealing with overwhelm and anxiety.

Feel free to hijack these 8 things and the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, take these steps to get unstuck and back on track:

Get an early win

Quick hygiene fix

Watch a 5-minute motivational video

Do the 10-10-10 Protocol

Do the Very Next Thing

Breathe, idiot!

Consume less, produce more

Ask for help

Break this list in case of emergency! Write these down, print it out, design your own checklist and share it with me so I can add it here to the post, whatever you want to do!

You can do this!

I’d love to hear from you: how do you manage overwhelm, and what are the steps you take to get out of that mental quicksand?!

Leave a comment below!

-Steve

PS: This week’s Rebel Hero: Nick T: rocking his new NF Battle Gear!

I can only assume he worked out so hard and flexed so perfectly that he blew the sleeves right off of it 🙂 Nick has been a super supportive member of our community for years and I’m damn glad he’s here.

Want to be the next Rebel Hero? Take a photo of you doing something epic in your NF battle gear, tag us on Instagram with #NerdFitness #battlegear, or email us at [email protected]!

PHOTO SOURCES: All amazing LEGO photos are from Black Zack, whose photos are here on Flickr.

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck. published first on http://fitnetpro.tumblr.com/

[lindafrancois]

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

“Why is my eye twitching?!”

It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.

It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.

And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:

“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.

“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!

“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”

They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.

Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!

Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.

What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. To salsa music. While setting off fireworks.

The days where this happens are shitty.

And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.

I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!

I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.

And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.

At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”

I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.

In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:

“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.

Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.

These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.

And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!

#1) GET AN EARLY WIN

For me, the best early win? Making my bed.

When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.

I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.

Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.

WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.

Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”

Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!

If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!

#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX

At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.

Wait, that came out wrong.

Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”

But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.

And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.

Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:

So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.

Oh, and the big one:

I floss.

Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”

RIP Mitch.

But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”

I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.

That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.

WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.

Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.

#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO

I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.

Mostly hate.

Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.

So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.

It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.

So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:

WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.

Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.

#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL

When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.

Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.

Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.

So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?

Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:

10 push-ups

10 lunges

10-minute walk

I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”

This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.

WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.

Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.

If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.

#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING

There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.

It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.

I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:

Busy is a choice.

It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.

And then I do three things:

Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.

Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.

Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.

Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.

Progress and momentum for the win!

Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”

Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”

As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.

WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.

And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.

No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.

It took 2 freakin’ minutes.

This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!

#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!

The past: I can’t change it!

The future: It hasn’t happened yet!

Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.

This is suboptimal.

So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”

(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)

Cool? Cool.

5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.

I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.

But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.

WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.

#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE

Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:

I consumed more than I created.

For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.

The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.

So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.

I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:

Television

Video games

Social media

Outrage news stories

Takeout

Books

In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.

If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.

I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.

JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.

And that means less consumption, more production and creation!

Writing and creating content, like this article

Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)

Cooking my own meal at home

Creating art, doodling, drawing

Creating conversation with friends

WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!

#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT

When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.

It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”

And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!

So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:

I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.

I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).

I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.

I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!

I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.

I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”

We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide to Mental Health, and if this is something you’re interested in please consider it!

Note: if you really struggle with depression/anxiety, speaking with a mental health professional could be a game-changing experience. Please do so as soon as you can!

WHY THIS WORKS: I used to be afraid to ask for help, assuming I had to know all the answers on my own. Or that people relied on me to be the happy-go-lucky person and I wasn’t allowed to be unhappy or stressed. And then I grew up.

Now I have no problem asking for help, saying “I don’t know” even if it makes me feel foolish, and I get to a solution MUCH faster!

I know with everything being online these days, it’s easy to spend a lot of time being friendly but not having actual deep conversations with people. This is something I have to work really hard on, as I’d much rather sit at home alone with a book all day and avoid people.

And yet, in most instances, when I’m with friends or loved ones, my day gets much better as a result. And thus, I prioritize saying YES. (Just not too much, so we don’t overload Future Steve.)

Overwhelmed? Do these 8 Things

Okay! This is my 8-step kickstart kickass strategy to dealing with overwhelm and anxiety.

Feel free to hijack these 8 things and the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, take these steps to get unstuck and back on track:

Get an early win

Quick hygiene fix

Watch a 5-minute motivational video

Do the 10-10-10 Protocol

Do the Very Next Thing

Breathe, idiot!

Consume less, produce more

Ask for help

Break this list in case of emergency! Write these down, print it out, design your own checklist and share it with me so I can add it here to the post, whatever you want to do!

You can do this!

I’d love to hear from you: how do you manage overwhelm, and what are the steps you take to get out of that mental quicksand?!

Leave a comment below!

-Steve

PS: This week’s Rebel Hero: Nick T: rocking his new NF Battle Gear!

I can only assume he worked out so hard and flexed so perfectly that he blew the sleeves right off of it 🙂 Nick has been a super supportive member of our community for years and I’m damn glad he’s here.

Want to be the next Rebel Hero? Take a photo of you doing something epic in your NF battle gear, tag us on Instagram with #NerdFitness #battlegear, or email us at [email protected]!

PHOTO SOURCES: All amazing LEGO photos are from Black Zack, whose photos are here on Flickr.

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck. published first on https://dietariouspage.tumblr.com/