#late night ramble

[phoenix-arts7]

Feeling a bit lonely tonight.

Just saying this now: I may be introverted and a bit guarded, but I don't want to be unapproachable. If anyone is genuinely willing to be friendly, I'll welcome a "Hello".

Preferably not in DMs though. That's reserved for people I feel I know well enough.

#idk might delete this later #phoenix chatter #late night ramble

[give-soup-please]

having given good omens a rewatch in preparation for season 2, i've been doing some thinking. and i caught something this time around that i haven't noticed on previous watches. (keep in mind, i'm basing this info on the tv series because i'm in the middle of re-reading the book as well, and i'm not all the way through it yet)

most main characters had a theme about defiance or defying expectations. not just our beloved angel and demon.

crowley and aziraphale are obvious about this, they directly defied heaven and hell's orders in order to save the world. they broke away from heaven and hell and began to be on their own side.

and we have to talk about adam as well. defying satan, choosing to save the earth, choosing his friends over his heritage. he's told directly by gabriel and beelzebub to start the war, and he outright refuses. pretty obvious defiance there.

but i also noticed that anathema burned the next set of prophecies. this is after newt says 'you don't want to be a descendant your whole life do you?' or something to that effect. the prophecies seemed to be a burden to her more than a joy, seeing as her entire life had essentially been planned out for her. and so she ends up defying the idea of predetermined fate for her own lineage. she sets herself free in this way.

i noticed that newt wound up being romantically involved with someone who is technically his enemy, because he ended up with a witch. it's noted that newt's and anathema's ancestors were enemies, and that newt's ancestor burned anathema's ancestor at the stake. so newt defied expectations by romantically pursuing anathema, despite the generational feud. (if i can call it that.)

Shadwell too, who spent the majority of life being a pretty hateful guy, ended up romantically involved with madame tracy, despite the vitriol he had for her. and he goes against the teachings of his own army in order to do that.

madame tracy decides to give up offering her services, and chooses to be with shadwell. to me, it seemed to me that she wasn't happy with her career path, and found it somewhat irritating on occasion if her expressions were anything to go by. she chose her own happiness over pursuing a career that didn't really seem that fulfilling. i think i can make an argument here that she defied shadwell's expectations to keep going just the way she was pre-apocalypse. but the main point here is that she did something extremely difficult. happiness can be a hard choice to make, and a complicated one. but she did it, and she seemed pretty glad by the time the episode was over.

so what can we learn from these characters about free will, making choices, and the act of defiance?

aziraphale and crowley can teach us that we are not bound by strict moral laws, that morality itself can be relative, and that if two options suck, try and look for a third option or a way out. essentially, we get to choose our own side.

adam can teach us that we are not bound by our genetics and can make the choice to be better than our parents. we can choose to separate ourselves out from bad family members. just because our parents were bad, doesn't mean we have to be as well.

anathema can teach us that we don't have to be bound by tradition and what our ancestors did. we have the choice to abandon the worldview and throw off the shackles of expectation and predestination. we can break the mold, if we want to.

newt can teach us the same lesson there, i think. with the added addition that love has an ability to overcome certain barriers.

shadwell can teach us that it is possible to make a choice to let go of hatred and bigotry. (though, let's be real. that guy has a longgggg way to go. still, he can be credited for having a decent start) and with less hatred in his heart, he's got a better chance at being well rounded.

and madame tracy can teach us that it's never too late to pursue happiness.

it's late, i don't know how much sense this is all making. but i can't help but notice that good omens is a lot of things to a lot of people. and during my rewatch, i saw that there was a lot of focus on defying expectations, making better choices for yourself and others, and pretty clear themes on free will.

choices, choices, it's all about the choices we make and how they define us.

and as someone who has struggled with defying harmful narratives, who has parents who are not good people, as someone who has wrestled with ancestral expectations, who has struggled to cast off internalized hatred due to things that are not in my control, who is trying so hard to make choices that will lead to happiness...

good omens is an exceptionally meaningful work.

and tonight, as i'm in an overthinking and overanalyzing mood, i feel like i'm so close to grasping something important here about myself. about what it means to be human. there's something here about choosing your own path that i'm just on the edge of understanding.

an epiphany just on the tip of my tongue.

how apples are worth eating, and the cost of free will might have been worth everything that came after, sure.

but something more personal as well. something about how we can be more than what we're told to be.

i'm actually getting a headache trying to parse everything out. (yes, really)

these characters, all from wildly different backgrounds, with different experiences and traumas, all making the same choice in different ways. the choices that work for them.

hard choices, difficult choices, but ones that lead to joy, to safety, to love...

bravery, courage, doing your best when the chips are down and the world is ending (or at least, when it feels that way)

i'm trying to put all this information together in a way that makes senes, because i feel like i'm on the edge of something groundbreaking in a personal way.

if i figure it out, i'll let you guys know.

#good omens #aziraphale #crowley #anathema #newt #madame tracy #analysis #late night ramble

[beefosaur]

absolutely batshit insane au i came up with in which the way that john and arthur end up getting separated is because detective noel dies in some action and john ends up being able to. take over his body/form. as a love letter of respect and remembrance towards him. the other only person who ever acknowledged him as his own identity.

of course this event is equally beautiful as it is extremely traumatizing to the both of them.

LEMME KNOW IF I SHOULD DRAW IT!😜😜

#late night ramble #i may be the number one noel fan i dont think anyone gives af like i do😭 #malevolent #au #? #malevolent podcast

[chirpsythismorning]

Fixations in fandom are valid.

Yes they can be unhealthy, just like too much of anything in life can be unhealthy.

But just like in life, you can’t control other ppl and force them like/unlike things bc of your own preferences and fixations.

What bothers me so much about the whole ‘all bylers care about is byler argument’ is that while… yes. Who tf cares?

The whole point of the ‘will they’ ‘won’t they’ trope is that it’s known for engaging viewers more than most storylines are able to, and it also tends to keep fans engaged for long periods of time. And it’s because they’re literally designed to keep you guessing and anticipating what comes next.

If romance isn’t your thing, fine. If gay ppl on your screen isn’t your thing, whatever. It is what it is. It’s not like we want to spend our time fixating on the stuff you like either.

Regardless of whether or not you ship byler, that still doesn’t mean you have to be insufferably incapable from analyzing their scenes and the show in general whatsoever?

Like the subreddit literally deletes/blocks posts that mention Will and Mike romantically at all, with the sole argument that there’s already similar posts to it.

But like be fr there are hundreds upon THOUSANDS of posts humoring the same old theories and shit takes, and yet they have no problem letting those constantly circulate on a regular basis.

But when it comes to byler, one post is enough! Two? Three? More than three?? Oh no. Now that just won’t do! This is too much we’re tired of talking about this! Can we talk about something else? ANYTHING else.

Idc if there have been 100 byler posts inquired on that sub over the last year, bc I can guarantee you, x that by 100 and that’s how many times ppl in that tag have posted stuff like ‘hot take but I hate Erica.’

Believe it or not, a majority of the ppl on there run-off of one brain cell and said brain cell is not the least bit impressive. Most of the time all they have is tired ignorant takes that only require ppl with basic critical thinking skills to unpack as crap right from the jump.

Seriously those mods are awful and the way they dictate what does and doesn’t stay posted on the sub is a fucking joke.

Idc if you like byler or not. If you’re so convinced it’s all reaching, actually look at the all evidence instead of censoring it followed by calling us delusional.

Bc while we may be annoying for obsessing over anything and everything, y’all are the ones not even willing to look at any of it. And as a result you’re soon gonna find out you misinterpreted everything because of your bitterness. Bc you were too close-minded to look behind the curtain at all.

#byler #late night ramble

[chainmail-butch]

Building a political machine in the United States is a daunting and frankly terrifying concept.

I just finished reading Elaine Brown's A Taste Of Power (which I highly recommend), and I'm moving on the autobiography of Black Panther Field Marshal DC Cox, which I'd rather not name at the moment.

Revolutionary Suicide and A Taste of Power together present a very clear picture of what the party looked like and how it operated in the public sphere, I hope that DC Cox will help me understand the more militant Underground.

I've been looking to these books for instruction. How they succeeded, how they failed, how the peculiarities of their time affected the decisions they made.

I study these books to find the answer that every US leftist struggles with: what is to be done?

In conjunction with the history of the Panthers, I've been reading Lenin. I've been distributing food. I've been attending rallies and protests. I've been talking to leftists who've been on the scene since the 60s, and I've been talking to leftists who were baptized in tear gas in the Seattle riots of 2021.

I'm learning. I'm watching what we do. I'm reading what we've done. And I'm trying to make sense of it all. My conclusion, so far, is that the American Left is a shambles. It's a disappointment.

We lack the will for decisive action because we're scared. No one says it, but we're terrified. The Red Scare and the NSA loom large in my mind. The FBI terrifies me. We whisper the word revolution because we know that we're surrounded by endless wiretaps. All listening. All recording. All looking for buzzwords and collating lists of names and locations. All in the name of Freedom. We whisper the word revolution, we hush each other, we stand and leave words unspoken. Because we're afraid.

Facing down the juggernaut that is the United States. Understanding its myriad cruelties and its endless violence has kept me awake at night for months.

I don't want to die. I don't want to see my life destroyed. I've fought so hard and for so long just to enjoy being alive, and I'm really not ready to give it up in a suicidal quest. An impossible war.

But I don't know what else to do. People freeze and starve in the streets. The police rape and murder in every community. Our leaders are abetting a transgender genocide while simultaneously reinstituting child labor.

The US rattles its saber and millions of lives shudder.

This beast cannot be allowed to persist. This nation cannot be allowed to destroy the world in the endless imperial quest for growth.

The only struggle is class struggle. The only war is class war.

And I am so incredibly afraid.

#late night ramble #archive

[nightbatthecat]

Late night post, but here we go: I never realized I’d be VERY interested in collecting physical fanzines! Digital Fanzines are cool and all, but there’s something special about holding physical fan works, and it’s a great feeling! I hope someday that I myself could join a fanzine, but alas, I have yet to unlock that achievement- 😅

#late night ramble #fanzines #physical media #i wanna join a fanzine one day #but my skills are still under leveled

[mad-raptorzzz]

Two random things:

I want to make a guardians of ga'hoole OC that's a Raven who joins the guardians and becomes a navigator and coiler. She gets some push back initially but the guardians are pretty chill and open so they accept her.

I really want to re read Darkstalker Legends

#late night ramble

[seer918]

I genuinely love stories of two people who reincarnate and keep finding each other, or one immortal always managing to come across the reincarnation of the friend, lover etc (just...so long as they don’t get creepy with it, of course)

And then there’s Good Omens, where two unaging (or at the very least, very very slow aging) beings who essentially reinvent themselves to fit in with the humans to varying degrees constantly managing to bump into each other from the begining and hopefully the end of humanity

Personally I like to think that around the time of the Blitz, Crowley started to actively track down Az (sorry Angel, your name has too many vowels for my ape brain to deal with) because while humans always had a capacity to be right bastards before, during war and especially this war and onwards they were being particularly clever about it and the old snake just knew the naive nephilim (couldn’t resist the probably lore inaccurate alliteration) was bound to get caught up in one conspiracy.

#Good Omens #late night ramble #tropes #reincarnation

[itspupppycat]

I just added like 2.5 gb of cc to my cas save folder. I’m so excited to play around with stuff I downloaded like several months ago. The folder is now almost 13 gb and I know that’s not a lot in the grand scheme of the mods folders but that’s almost the same save as the Langleys mod folder so… Mind you the cas save is only cas cc no other mods besides essentials and no other category of cc. It’s so awesome having it like this because I get to play around with my sim style and try new things without worrying about if it fits the sims vibe. I don’t know why I care about that stuff but I do so I roll with it lol.

#late night ramble #it’s a high puppycat #it’s a puppycat ramble #black simblr #black simmer #simblr #the sims 4 #I just spent so long looking through my recently downloaded cc to make sure I added everything from the last month #but I don’t think I’ve opened this save since like august or something wild like that #I get to test out some default eyes that were updated and hopefully work properly #oh maybe I can put all my non default eyes back in if they fixed the issue #cause why were all the swatches showing up on the sim as blue eyes 😒😒 #I’m not trying to put all my sims in blue contacts cause that’s how it looked #it was wild but if they fixed it I’ll be stoked cause I really liked the texture from the previews #sorry for the extra tag ramble 🫣

[phoenix-arts7]

Why is it always 3am when my brain decides to fill with cool ideas. You had the entire day to come up with this shit. What the fuck, brain

#I call it the magic hour #late night ramble #art #ideas #writing

[tragedyinblue]

BBU Community Days, #7

@bbu-on-the-side

{Day 7: Details} What's a detail of BBU worldbuilding you always wanted to dive into? Do it now and ramble a bit!

CW just in case: Mentions of things related to death

It's late and I'm tired so this is gonna be a ramble for sure. Since my story focuses on a Caregiver designation Pet for an elderly person, I've been looking into/pondering two topics:

First, the process (if any) for inheriting Pets when their master/mistress dies: does WRU offer re-training services upon the transfer of a Pet to next-of-kin or whoever the original owner designates in their will? Does that service include the Drip? That's probably up to the new owner, but what would be the situations where you'd want to wipe the previous owner from memory? Were they too good to the Pet for the new one's liking? Or the opposite, where the new caretaker thinks that it's a mercy to remove the memories, not knowing that the Drip is physically and mentally painful (and of course WRU won't tell them it is)?

Second, the responsibilities and legal obligations/of a Pet around an owner's end-of-life events. For example, suppose an owner doesn't have a DNR on file but commands their Pet to let them die? Or maybe they do have a DNR but decide in their final moments that they actually want to live? What are the legal consequences of that? Like, maybe you could shoehorn the first two laws of robotics here (1. don't hurt or allow a human to be hurt & 2. obey an order unless it conflicts with #1), but there have definitely been stories of Pets being ordered to hurt people, so the laws would really only fit specific scenarios. And maybe that's okay? Maybe Caregiver pets are required to follow those laws? Still pondering it obviously, but this is where I'm at.

#bbu #bbu community #bbucd #late night ramble #day7

[anxious-symbols]

I don't understand how I can be depressed and touch starved and horny all at the same time

I want to die but I want to be fucked hard but I want to be gently cuddled and kissed also

maybe I just wanna be of use to someone lol

I'd like to be kidnapped and taken away and kept by someone who would care for me please

nobody who wants me is close enough to actually take me though.. if they really even want me lol

mmmnh

(it's late and I can't sleep)

#late night ramble #ignore this lol

[66sharkteeth]

I saw your post on twitter and I just wanted to say that I love your work, City of Blank has been my favourite webcomic for years now and I'm super excited for the last season. Thank you so much for what you do 💜

i prefer to reply to things like this late when nobody's online but just wanted to say thank you!! i made sure to post that tweet late as well when less people would see it, but i'm still crying like a baby over the responses from the people who did see it

while on this note, just to further address this-

I'm aware I've just been an absolute downer for a while now to the point i feel like it's become my personality and I think I just wanted to finally put it out there that like, yes, i am struggling with some form of problem, I'm aware, and I want to start more officially addressing it. i really don't wanna be that sad mopey artist. i just wanna be proud and happy of what i create like everyone else. i think some kind of existential crises around CoB ending has made things even worse lately, but i really hope that now that i've addressed there's a problem that i can start to get past it.

i feel like i'll have to just pretend to be happy and confident for a while, but i hope that can eventually kind of trick my brain into believing that's the truth, same way it's tricked me into believing my work has no value for so long

#late night ramble #i'll shut up w/ this stuff after tonight but i did wanna take the time to respond to some of the kind messages #but i didn't wanna embarrass myself w/ another post like this on twitter haha #this place is better for these kind of thoughts and rambles because there's such a smaller group

[karunava]

late night brain has triggered. the adhd meds are on full swing now. thinking about blaseball umpires. what if. they each represent a different quadrant. so. each effect is representative of an old beta quadrant at the end of it all.

blue. incinerations. the hall yearns. it is a menace we know, but people have fallen from its grasp before. we have the return of those who were once gone. will they return again? will a familiar menace simply lose our favorite names into crowds upon crowds of dead, pleading with the coldest color for them back?

white. alternates. the desert beckons. what will it find, one may ask, except broken enigmas of a person's soul and different stats that may have once been? what does it seek to extract? tides shift. mountains crack. play ball. pick up the pieces, scream at them, they will not change for you nor any other Fan nor mortal nor blaseball non-official. only the Universe may restore them.

yellow. can't lose. curses. the vault looms. lootcrates, are you there? are you watching the pride and joy of what you have created? will you look upon the abomination of sorrow you have birthed and dub it comedy? they are gilded in gold just as you once called for. do you call for it once more? will they be enshrined in an unmoving strangulation once all is said and done?

red. knight shifts. the fire's call is for all hours, all workers, all that may appear in its hallowed halls and homes and histories. the red claws and beckons to escape itself. it beckons on the verge of its supernova, its blackened awakening into another force of destruction. it must be stopped. play must continue for now. the fire calls for all hours. it does not care who must replace the ones that are called - only that they come to their shifts and remain until the work is done. the debt has been refinanced. it must remain so until paid.

what if the colors correspond to something painfully familiar, yet so far away?

#i may have gone overboard #but i think this is fun to think about #blaseball #late night ramble

[feelings-fleeted]

if you can't handle me at my best, then you don't deserve me at my worst

#desiblr #late night ramble #anxiety #just cptsd things

[fellis-world]

Guess one thing I love the most about gw2 is the fact that love doesn't know boundaries. No matter which race or gender you won't find a npc in this game who finds it weird that a charr loves a human or a norn loves a sylvari. Its normal. Its accepted. Its just love. And I think thats beautiful

#late night ramble #when felli gets tired #this happens #bear with me #but my point stands. #and i go to sleep now