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#looks more like spree to me
moeblob · 3 months
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Harvey telling the farmer it's their time for the annual check up before knowing them for a year is always funny to me. But the fact I keep drawing Asmodeus♡ with a big mouth and fangs made me read the dialogue more like "that's scary, please stop" rather than "okay onto the next part".
Anyway, I have never drawn Harvey before so please enjoy my attempt. (gives him a lil gray. as a treat. to me. the gray is for me.)
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obsob · 2 years
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wizard that makes u nonbinary
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cyanide-latte · 13 hours
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Gonna be reblogging a lot of moots' stuff and putting "tag later" on it as a reminder to myself.
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ackee · 1 year
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where have all the (NORMAL. NORMAL!!!) furry breakcore artists gone
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leatherbookmark · 10 months
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hopping around different blogs is fun.
a post on blog 1: i find it a little weird that -- don't get me wrong, the barbie movie looks great with all the doll-like details, i bet the actors had great fun and i'd like to see it myself, but -- people are getting excited about marketing of this movie. they're acting as though mattel's 3985* deals with 837* different companies are something new, exciting and creative instead of... 3985 deals with 837 companies spanning many different areas! this movie is a commercial for a doll! isn't this kinda weird?
*numbers made up
a post on blog 2: i don't think any sane adult doesn't realize that this is a toy commercial! it's rather obvious.
a post on blog 3: boo hoo 'the barbie movie is capitalist propaganda' i don't give a SHIT marx won't fuck you. did you do this for transformers too? do you think only stupid girls who like pink need the reminder?
like, oooooh! things are happening!
#shrimp thoughts#earlier today i got into a bit of an essay reading spree (as much as my brain allowed me lol)#and it got me thinking about like... associating oneself with products/aesthetics/companies as a way of self-creation#this is me. i love [fashion brand] you won't catch me without my k*nken and here is my room in which you can see posters of [movies]#it's very... human to get excited about things and feel it more the more others get excited because. community building#at the same time i've noticed it myself that it's so much easier to label yourself a [thing] girl than to like... Look Into Yourself#who am i? what defines me? these questions are difficult because how do i know that? with what means do i obtain this knowledge?#should i create myself as i want or should i observe myself with the eyes of others instead? ...let me just say i like plants and overalls#and i feel like when someone says something you perceive as a critique of the identity slash community you associate yourself with#it's... hurtful? but at the same time. hm. i don't know actually#like chances are these posts are talking about completely different things and not vaguing each other or even similar posts#maybe posts that blog 3 vagues really were obnoxiously condescending! who knows! that being said DESPITE being a small-brained#shrimp who would honestly love to win soooo many moneys and just do whatever i want all day instead of being an Independant and Competent#Expert In My Field (this sounds scary and stressing). i still would like to avoid falling into the 'just let me ENJOY things and don't try#to make me hate femininity because it's not working! pink and shopping can be empowering' hole.#idk!! i listen to k/pop and am part magpie. i can't quite pose myself as like anti-capitalist intellectual#but i do want to achieve at least a small brain! someday!! and boy do i hope my brain energy days don't end before the books arrive;;#2am thoughts. wonder if my mother goes to sleep earlier than at 4am today because its getting annoying
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vigilskeep · 1 year
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do you guys prefer me using my queue system or rbing random sprees of content
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orcelito · 11 months
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Honestly manga Midvalley and trigun 98 Midvalley are basically two different characters
Yea I wanna punch manga Midvalley constantly, but I also find him interesting & a compelling character. The times I've seen 98 Midvalley he just looks so sleazy lmao it makes me REALLY wanna punch him
Tough choices
#speculation nation#thinking about how i have midvalley with a significant role in my fic#& hes currently the character with the most scenes aside from vash bc of it#i have him based Solely on the manga characterization. bc i like him in the manga actually#but then i see 98 midvalley mostly acting as an accessory to Legato's murder sprees via sax solos#& it's like. where's the Realism? the Grumpiness! the utter hatred of his circumstances & fear of the higher powers?!?!?!#manga Midvalley is FASCINATING to me bc he's just like Wolfwood in a way.#caught between these two insane angels' brotherly dispute & hating EVERY second of it#but while Wolfwood rolls with the situation quite well (in large part bc he ends up aligned with Vash & we all know hes a sweetheart)#Midvalley decides he cant handle this anymore and rebels even though he knows it will crash and burn#better to try to live on his own terms than bow to that fucking angel for one more second#even though he knows it will probably kill him. and then it does.#that's fascinating to me!!!! but 98 midvalley feels so 90s anime villain hdkshfjdn#and i just Cant believe they gave him bitches. Midvalley??? with Women??? oh come on just look at him#that man's the kind of gay that refuses to flirt and then wonders why he doesnt get any action#he thinks he's BETTER than dating apps. and then he privately bemoans how alone he is#that or he just doesnt care about romance or sex at All. i could see that too lmfao#bottom line is. Midvalley does not get bitches. he DOESNT. thats just my humble opinion at least.#wow this turned into a ramble. may or may not be prompted by me writing him again. i just have many thoughts about him#trigun spoilers/
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somelazyassartist · 2 years
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Wait there are people unironically attracted to Kurt from Spree. Are you telling me there are also people unironically attracted to Patrick Bateman too
#i guess it's not like the worst thing it just sorta caught me off guard lmao#like PLEASE don't get me wrong#i LOVE a fucked up man covered in blood#but like..... they're parody characters lmao#they're meant to satirize these types of guys doing anything to be their view of 'perfect' but in doing so are pathetic for it#Kurtz ramping his content from regular stuff to illegal stuff to murder in order to try to get social media popularity#but in turn becoming more and more pathetic and desperate for attention and getting clumsier with his work because of it#and Patrick Bateman obsessively trying to become The Perfect Guy™ and fitting in with high society to an unhealthy degree#but who turns into a whiny crybaby brat whenever he doesn't get his way and who can't handle any slight ounce of criticism#like... their motivations are their downfalls#they're a parody of themselves the more they try to succeed the more pathetic and cringe they're supposed to be seen like#like. they're a joke. they're meant as a joke#they're their own downfall and they're whiny babies and i love making fun of how stupid they are#so looking up spree and seeing like 15 posts of reader x fanfiction about the whiny baby loser murderer lmao#again there's nothing wrong with it necessarily whatever floats your boat they're fictional whatever idc#not here for morality discourse or anything lmao#i just think it's kinda interesting and a little funny to see people interpret satire characters in that way#literally just think it's interesting from like an interpretation standpoint this isn't a judgment lmao
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greaseonmymouth · 1 year
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went through my marked for later list on ao3 to whittle it down as it’s been 5 years since I last just cleared the history knowing I would never get around to reading all 19 pages anyway, but I didn’t want to do that this time because I have just added a bunch of fics to it and anyway I had 14 pages and now I have 8 and I’m not sure that made any difference actually
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sunblasted · 1 year
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Lmaoooo my brother just walked in on me murdering a bunch of villagers in fable 3 to upgrade a weapon and got super horrified and was like ‘I would simply not use that weapon.’ Its fable, rapid morality changes is the name of the game babeeeeeey
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contradictivs · 2 years
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gonna out ryder as a slasher fucker tbh
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neganium · 1 month
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When the number of fics for your obscure fandom ticks up by one but when you go and check you can't see anything new, and so you just know it was by one of the people you blocked, most of whom were in some way or description absolutely fucking nasty more often than they were not 🙃
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illusioninfnty · 7 months
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day 15 ; keeping quiet
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↠ billy loomis x reader x stu macher
fandom: scream word count: 3.9k warnings: nsfw 18+, gf!billy and stu, DUBCON, semi-public sex, homoerotic undertones, mentions of gore, cheating, degradation, dirty talk, thigh fucking, double penetration, knife play if you squint, gagging, unprotected sex, creampies, cumplay, cum eating, fingering, my stu bias definitely shows sorry guys
kinktober m.list || read on ao3
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You weren’t really much of a party person, and all of your friends were aware of that. It was why none of them gave much resistance to the idea of you slipping away.
Stu’s house was insanely crowded, more than his usual parties. It was obviously because of the recent killing spree by the mysterious masked killer who had yet to be caught. Your general anxiety in loud spaces mixed with that of the unknown killer running around had you even more paranoid.
“Be careful!” Sidney calls out and Tatum waves as you make your way up the staircase. You send a small smile back as you weave your way through drunk teenagers stumbling all around, looking for more drinks.
You’ve been in Stu’s house plenty of times, having been friends with him for years at this point. You make a beeline straight for his bedroom, hoping that no one was in there hooking up so you could have a quiet place to decompress. 
You knock loudly on his door, pressing your ear against it as the loud music and teens make it hard to hear inside. There’s no answer to your knowledge, and you slowly peek your head in.
No one is in the room, and you breathe a sigh of relief. You shut the door behind you and plop down on Stu’s bed, laying yourself out in a heap of exhaustion.
A bang from somewhere inside the room startles you, making you jump up from your seat. You notice that Stu’s closet door is slightly ajar, and figure that something inside fell down. You make your way over, the closet creaking as you open it.
A gasp leaves your lips and you step back after seeing what it was that fell.
It was one of the ghostface masks. 
You slowly back away, eyes wide in disbelief with what you were seeing. No. It wasn’t possible, right? Stu couldn’t have been the killer; it made no sense. You bend down and cautiously pick up the mask.
It looks like your average store-bought cheap costume accessory. You inspect it closer, but bring a hand up to your mouth and almost drop the mask when you see what’s stained on it.
Small flecks of blood, all spattered across the edges.
The sound of the door creaking has you throwing the mask back into the closet and slamming the door, chest heaving as you pretend as though you weren’t searching through it.
In walks Stu, his trademark grin spread wide across his face. 
“Now what are you doing in here?” he teases suggestively and wiggles his eyebrows. He closes the door and leans against it.
But clearly you’re not very good at hiding your emotions, because the smile instantly drops from Stu’s face. “Have you been…snooping in my things?”
You bite your lip and can feel your heart drop in your chest. “What? No! I just came in here to rest.” Your voice sounds incredibly shaking and you know there’s no way he’s buying it.
Stu’s eyes narrow, and he stalks closer to you. You back away in return, but his long strides make it difficult to put distance between the two of you. “I think you’re lying to me.”
He utters out your name in a warning tone. At this point, you know, he knows you know, and you know he knows you know that he’s the Ghostface killer. You make a feeble attempt to duck past Stu and make a run for it, but he grabs your arm and pulls you against his chest, completely restraining you.
You try your best at escaping. You pound on his chest, wiggle in his grip, and even try biting him. That fails miserably and Stu slaps his large palm against your mouth, preventing you from screaming for help.
He drags you over to the bed, and you start to kick your heels against his legs. You aren’t sure what he’s capable of anymore. Is this the moment you die? Is Stu going to kill you? You let out a choked sob underneath his palm, clawing at his hand but to no avail.
You push back against him with all of the force of your body, yet Stu remains solid. “Be quiet,” he mutters in your ear. 
And then you feel it. On your backside, you can feel Stu getting hard. You whimper in fear, and your body goes limp. But he clearly notices that you could feel it, and he chuckles darkly.
“Got me excited with all that struggling, babe.” He shamelessly rubs himself against you, his erection fully hard beneath his pants now.
Despite the terror that you feel in that moment, you couldn’t help but moan silently.
You would be lying if you said you never thought of hooking up with your friend. Stu was hot, he was funny, and if Tatum was a reliable source, he also had a huge dick.
If fucking Stu could save you from death, you would gladly let him use you however he wished.
You quickly concoct a plan in your head—a lame one, but a plan—to seduce Stu in an attempt to hopefully convince him not to kill you afterwards.
Before you can even attempt to put your plan into action, the bedroom door creaks open. “Shit,” you hear Stu mutter under his breath. Both you and him turn together, and in walks Billy, sauntering as he usually does.
He pauses and raises an eyebrow as he surveys the position you and Stu are in.
“Did I interrupt something?” Billy smirks, his eyes going dark. You look up through your eyelashes at Stu, who presses you closer to him, as if warning you not to signal for help. He shakes his head at Billy.
“She knows, man.”
Your body goes completely rigid in Stu’s grip. A chill runs down your spine.
Billy was involved in this Ghostface shit too? Well, that actually surprised you less than Stu. Billy was kind of a horror junkie in secret, even rivaling Randy, and he always had this strange look in his eye whenever he thought no one was looking.
His eyes narrow and his jaw clenches. “Oh?” 
The tone in his voice is sinister, much different than what you’ve heard from him before.
He strides over, pulling out a knife from his pocket and holding it out towards you.
You shriek, but it comes out all muffled. You try to tilt your head away from where Billy points the knife to your chin, but Stu keeps his hand solid, forcing your head forward.
He clicks his tongue at you, teasing you for your failed attempts to escape.
“I really didn’t want to kill you now, sweetheart, but I don’t have much of a choice, do I?”
Tears gather in your eyes, threatening to fall. You still helplessly struggle against Stu’s grip, choking back sobs. You so desperately want Stu to release his hand, want to beg the two of them to keep you alive. You’re two seconds away from sounding like you belong in a bad porno that the boys rent from the video store where the woman says please! I’ll do anything!
But you don’t need to do any of that. Because before Billy starts slicing and dicing and stabbing at you, he backs away and looks Stu up and down. He then barks out a laugh.
“What, did chasing her around get you all stiff?”
Stu grins cheekily and grinds his erection up against your butt. You let out a surprised moan under his palm, grabbing onto his forearm. “You know I’ve always wanted to fuck her, man.”
Billy eyes shift between you and Stu, before pausing on you. A smirk slowly grows across his features until it morphs into a toothy grin. You can see the way his cock begins to twitch in his jeans and your heart sinks into your stomach.
“I’m not going to let you fuck her alone tonight.”
As if Stu was waiting this whole time for Billy’s approval, the hand that was restricting your mouth moves off and down to his jeans. Before you can even think about opening your mouth, Billy brings the knife back up your face, right under your chin forcing you to keep your mouth closed and head tilted up to meet his eyes.
“If you say a word I’ll cut your throat open and stick my cock in it.” He imitates the motion of slicing the knife across your throat. 
You swallow harshly and can’t control the way you tremble under Stu’s hold. But the depraved part of you has your core throbbing, at the carnal lust that fills his eyes, so desperately wanting them both to get to fucking you sooner rather than later. 
Scoffing in his face, you try your best to put up a calm front. “Are you guys all bark and no bite? All I hear is talking but no action.”
“Oh you’ll be getting action soon, baby.” You can feel Stu’s erect cock rubbing against your backside and the way that his arousal stains your shirt. His hand holds it at the base as he guides it between your legs, slowly fucking you between your thighs. You look down to see the bulging red tip of his cock leaking beads of precum as it penetrates the plush skin of your legs with every thrust.
Billy takes his knife and slices your skirt right down the middle, the two pieces falling to shreds at your feet.
“Yeah, there it is!” Stu yells as his long fingers poke and prod at your pussy through your underwear until it soaks the fabric through. “All nice and wet for us now.”
He moves the material to the side of your puffy lips and without so much as a warning sticks his cock right inside.
“Oh fuck,” you moan out as quietly as you can with the intense pleasure. It slides in easily with how wet you’ve gotten over the past couple of minutes. You arch your back into Stu as his long cock bullies its way inside of you. “Fuck, fuck, fuck—”
Stu begins thrusting immediately, the sounds of your skin slapping together being the loudest thing in the room.
“Such a dirty little slut,” Stu’s voice teases, laughter evident in his tone. His arm around your waist holds you up as he pounds into you at lightning speed, bouncing you up and down his cock. Your feet lift off the ground ever-so-slightly as he pulls you up. “But I guess I’m kind of a slut to. Always wanted to fuck you like this.”
Through your lust-filled haze, you can see Billy stroking himself through his boxers, jeans already unzipped and pulled down. He stares at both you and Stu and where the two of you connect. 
“You gonna join man?” Stu lifts you up under your thighs. The action lifts your feet up in the air and exposes your pussy directly in Billy’s line of view. Stu pulls his cock out enough so just the head remains inside, and starts fingering around your lips.
You gasp at the sensation, your arms gripping his own and your walls clenching down desperately onto him. Stu’s fingers make a v shape and pull your lips open wide. “There’s plenty of room for you in here.” 
“N-no!” You sob out, clawing at Stu and kicking your legs. The implication is not subtle at all, and the fear has you clenching even tighter onto him. There was no way that you could fit both of them in your pussy. Stu’s cock is already thick and fills you completely; you don’t think you could take another one without breaking.
Billy continues to palm himself above his underwear, the head of his cock poking out from the elastic band. “Fuck yeah, now your speaking my language!”
“No! Billy!” You shake your head wildly, tears threatening to fall from your swollen eyes. “Stop! It won’t fit!”
He rolls his eyes and takes his hard cock out of his boxers, pumping it with a few solid strokes. “Stop complaining.” 
“He’ll make it fit,” Stu giggles from behind you.
A strangled sound leaves your lips, a mix between a choke and a sob. You’re powerless in Stu’s hold as he moves your limbs every which way he pleases. He never lets up in his thrusts, his stamina completely insatiable, and it doesn’t feel like he’s stopping any time soon.
You have no choice but to lay helpless as Billy guides his cock into your wet hole, pushing against Stu’s. The stretch from the two of their massive lengths is painful, and you bite the outside of your hand as an attempt to soften your cries.
“Fuck,” Billy moans, slotting himself fully inside of you. His eyes squeeze shut and his head is thrown back in pleasure. Your hands press against his chest to stabilize yourself. 
Your eyes roll back as you start moaning audibly, his cock stuffing you full alongside Stu’s. 
“None of that.” Billy slaps a hand over your mouth and digs his fingers into your cheek. “If any one of those sleazebags outside hears those moans I’ll have to kill them and fuck you over their dead body.”
His voice is deep, gravely, and completely serious—you believe him in his entirety. You nod rapidly under his hold. You don’t want the death of anyone to be on your hands, no matter how annoying they are.
“Good. Now stay quiet.”
Billy and Stu take turns fucking themselves up into you. They give you any chance for a break, when one pulls their length almost completely out, the other shoves it in. They take turns pounding themselves into you. Your walls clench hard around them, being stretched to the brim. It takes all your power not to cry out from the pain and pleasure, but the fear from Billy’s unpredictably overpowers all other emotions. 
Billy seems to be caught up in the haze of his own arousal, fingers digging in the skin of your hips as he thrusts his cock in and out of you rhythmically. He groans. “Forgot what it’s like to fuck a tight, wet hole. Sidney still hasn’t put out yet.”
Your body instantly freezes at Billy’s words. In the midst of all the chaos that involved finding out that two of your friends were active serial killers, both of them have been wanting to fuck you, and both of them actually proceeding to fuck you, you were ashamed to admit that you completely forgot about your the rest of your friends downstairs. Sidney and Tatum, two of your closest friends, were partying just below you and were blissfully unaware that you were in fact not resting from the partying, but instead getting your hole absolutely destroyed by their boyfriends just a couple hundred feet away.
The reality of your situation comes back to you and the dread starts to sink in. Instinctively, you begin thrashing your body all around, causing as much commotion as you can. Your nails end up scratching Stu on his arm. “Ow!” he whines out, but it’s a cross between a whimper and a turned on moan. He bites your neck in retaliation. “I like ‘em feisty, you know. Really gets my dick goin’.”
Billy, on the other hand, doesn’t take your failed act of defiance so lightly. His hand reaches up and squeezes your cheeks as he pulls your face close to him, not letting up with the pistoning of his hips.
“Not. A. Word.” Every syllable is spoken individually, heavily gritted out through clenched teeth. At that moment, an array of muffled voices is heard right outside the bedroom door. Billy and you turn to the source of the noise at the same time. Billy turns back to you first. “You know what happens if they walk in,” he trails off darkly, and out of the corner of your eye you can see the glint of his knife as it rests on the side table, within an arm's reach from him. If he wanted to, he could easily slip himself out of you and kill the unsuspecting partygoers within mere seconds.
He buries himself back inside of you as you say that, the two of their cocks fighting for their spots inside of your restrictive walls. Billy and Stu moan in unison at the feeling, both of you gripping onto them and the way they feel pressed up against each other.
As hopeless as your situation may seem in the end, you try to make due with what you have and not let the guilt consume you. There’s nothing you can do about it now unless you want multiple people to wind up dead. It’s fairly easy to erase your mind of anything other than the two guys currently surrounding you, whose relentless thrusts make your vision go white and limbs go numb.
Stu attaches himself onto your neck, no doubt leaving a trail of hickeys that’ll last for days. You lean your head back into him, giving him more access to the area. His long tongue licks all around the area, sending shivers down your spine.
His mouth eventually makes its way up to your own and Stu covers it, kissing you with great fervor. His tongue slides into your mouth, swirling it around with your own tongue. The kiss is sloppy and uncoordinated, but it feels perfectly like him. It’s intimate as he massages your tongue and brings his hand up to cup your jaw. In that single moment, you can pretend like your new revelation didn’t exist and that this is just a sensual moment between you and your friend, who’s kissing you like his life depends on it.
But that’s not the case, as Billy brings you back to reality once again. He spanks your ass which has you gasping into Stu’s mouth and your eyes opening wide.
Spit dribbles out the side of your mouth as Stu finally lets up, moaning into your jaw. He gives your neck a big kiss before sucking another hickey into it. “I can be romantic sometimes,” he whispers teasingly into your ear, causing you to shiver.
Billy and Stu pound into you, even harder than before if possible, their hips snapping up against your body.
You know that your orgasm is fast approaching, the various simulations making you feel desperate for a release.
“Please, please, please, please,” your voice is hoarse as you whisper out in a breathy tone to keep as quiet as possible.
“Yeah? You want our cum inside of you?” Billy coaxes you, but you can tell that he’s just as close to reaching his peak as you are given the uneven rhythm of his ruts, pushing slightly against the pattern he had set with Stu.
You nod your head as much as you can, your vision going blurry with the speed you move it. You can feel Billy’s cock throb furiously in you and it's enough to make you reach your own orgasm before him, clapping a hand over your mouth as to not alert your presence to anyone outside.
Billy’s orgasm follows your own soon after, with a strangled moan leaving his lips as his hot cum releases all inside you. The mix of your two juices allows for easier movement within your walls, and after he’s done climaxing Billy slides out of you with ease.
But Stu is nowhere near stopping.
With the result of your’s and Billy’s releases aiding him, Stu ruts himself even further into you. He manhandles you so that instead of your previous position of being twisted in the air as Stu stands behind you, he throws you down on top of the bed and climbs on top of you, humping into you from behind with a newfound vigor.
“Finally get you to myself for a bit,” Stu grits out of his teeth as his hips piston at an immeasurable speed.
You can’t speak at this point, completely cockdrunk from the brunt of the thrusts you’re taking. Stu’s broad body completely engulfs your form as he pounds you into the bedsheets. Your eyes roll into the back of your head, and your tongue lolls out of your mouth, only low whimpers and droll being produced from it.
You can hear the squelching of your pussy, the result of Billy’s cum and your juices, as Stu pounds his cock as far as it reaches. You can feel the release escape the sides of your pussy lips with the brunt of Stu’s thrusts and you can’t help but whine softly as some of the warmth and fullness from the cum leaves your body.
Stu’s hand runs through your hair until he grabs it at the base. He pushes your head down completely into the bed, using much more pressure than what was needed. The force of it causes your ass to arch further into him as he presses his front fully against your back, curving his form as if morphing to the shape of your hunched and fucked out form.
“Now that’s a nice view,” he groans out, one hand at the root of your hair and the other pawing at your ass.
Animalistic grunts leave Stu’s mouth and you can feel as he reaches the cusp of his orgasm. Curses leave his lips as he finally cums, pushing himself inside you as deep as he can and hitting parts never reached before. You can feel the jets of his hot release inside of you as it comes out in huge, thick spurts.
When Stu finally leaves your walls, the mix of all three of your orgasms comes flowing out, making you moan at the loss of the fullness from all three of you.
“C’mon now, push it all outta you,” Billy’s voice calls out from across the room, speaking up from his previous silent observer role as he recovered from his own peak.
You obey, squeezing as much as you can with your weak body. You can feel globs of cum escape your entrance, cooling as it runs down your thighs and onto the sheets below you.
You flinch as you feel Stu’s fingers scoop some out of you, and the smacking of his lips indicates he tasted it. You moan, only able to picture what the scene looks like.
“Oh? You want some?” Stu’s fingers hastily appear in front of you. The fingers from his other hand pull your mouth open and he shoves the cum covered ones inside, making you gag instantly. He rams them in and out of your mouth, barely giving you any time to properly suck on the cum. Flecks of the fluid fly out of your mouth along with your own saliva. Tears fall without a warning, your gag reflex working overtime.
Stu’s fingers fuck your mouth until all of the cum is virtually gone from them. When he finally pulls them out, your body completely collapses. It trembles furiously from all the overstimulation, unable to hold itself up.
Stu gives you a big wet kiss on your cheek and slaps his now-limp cock onto your bare ass. You can only whimper in response, your body too heavy to move any part of it right now. Your vision is blurry, but through it you manage to make out Billy, with his sweaty complexion and rumpled clothes back on his body, talking down to you.
“You stay put until we can get everyone to piss off. We’ll be back for round two.”
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bipediam · 10 months
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slttygeto · 6 months
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note: reader knows a bit of french, very self indulgent.
teacher and twin girls dad! suguru who doesn’t watch his mouth around his 11 month old twin girls and ends up saying a curse word. you’re out on a little much needed shopping spree and told him you’ll be back in a bit, but now he wishes to just flee the country because he knows he’s in trouble.
“fuhck!” one of his baby girls repeats after him and all color is drained from his face.
“no no baby-“
“fuck fuck-“ the other twin joins her sister and suguru has to hold his head in his hands as he watches the chaos unfold before him. he needs them to learn another word, or find a word similar to the curse word to avoid getting in trouble with you—oh! he knows what to do.
fuck is similar to a french word you taught him…phoque…the animal, yeah! yeah you’d totally buy that!
“i’m back!” you announce as you open the door and the sound of your babies squealing and crying as they try to crawl towards you makes your heart swell.
“oh pretty girls, did you miss me? I thought you loved papa!” you pick both of them up with so much ease—11 months of learning how to do things when suguru wasn’t around truly paid off.
“hi baby,” suguru emerges from the kitchen with an apron around his waist and you giggle at how small it is before pecking his lips.
“hey there, you look so attractive,” you tease your husband and he rolls his eyes as he tries to take one of your baby girls from you, but she clings onto you and your jaw slightly drops.
“this is new! yesterday you refused to come to me,” you tease your little girl before pecking her check—not without doing the same to your other baby girl of course.
“dada fuhck!”
suguru watches as your smile drops and your head whips toward him and he cannot believe that he shivers at your stare. your husband has seen every side of you, but becoming a mother has definitely made you 10 times scarier (and more attractive).
“what?”
“oh you know, I turned on the TV and there was this french channel that had a documentary about animals and stuff—“
“you don’t even understand french.” shit, you weren’t buying it.
“but you do! and apparently, our girls got that from you—“
“suguru.” you say sternly and he slowly starts to accept his faith.
“chat!” “meoww,” the little interaction between your twin girls is unexpected. the random french coming out of their mouths makes you a bit confused, but suguru doesn’t care—it seems like you’re buying his story.
“that’s…cat in french—okay, but out of every animal they chose to say seal?” you sigh a little and suguru kisses your forehead.
“it’s okay, we can teach them other words like… bonjour?”
“hm, might as well do it.”
thank god you believed his bullshit of a story.
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2023: all works belong to @ slttygeto. do not repost my works on any other platofrm.
—💭 if you like this, leave me a tip!
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ham1lton · 28 days
Text
i fell for you.
pairing: lando norris × reader (no faceclaim).
warnings + summary: nothing!! just lando going on his prince charming looking spree after a trolley hit and run.
author's note: thanks for the request! hope i did it justice lol. i’m currently on a long bus journey home so let me know if you have any more requests. i have exhausted my spotify playlists 😔💔
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liked by yourbffsuser, bff2user and 34 others.
yourusername: GUESS WHO JUST PASSED HER TEST 😍😍😍😍 took my girls out to eat like the true sugar daddy that i am.
bff2user: thanks for the food!!! 🤤😍
-> yourusername: ur welcome bbg 😘💍
yourbffsuser: ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP
-> yourusername: YASSSSSSSSSS
-> bff2user: girl come get on a ft call with us!!
-> yourbffsuser: she can do us one better… she can DRIVE to us now.
-> yourusername: BOOOOOOOO!! i can’t!! i’m supposed to be taking my little brother grocery shopping. my parents are in work till late today.
-> bff2user: BOOOOO!! call us afterwards!!!
-> yourusername: I WILL 😍😘‼️💕
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liked by yourbffsuser, bff2user and 40 others.
yourusername: i like to think i’m halfway decent at this photography shit.
yourbffsuser: WHOS THAT??
-> yourusername: it’s you guys? duh 🙄
-> yourbffsuser: bffr 😒 you know what i mean.
bff2user: we look so good in the first pic!! don’t we yourbffsuser?
-> yourbffsuser: WHAT ABOUT THE MAN IN PIC 2!!
-> yourbffsuser: WHOLE ASS MAN ON MY TL NO WARNING NO APOLOGY NO NOTICE NO NOTHIN!!
-> yourbffsuser: SHES SOFT LAUNCHING!!
-> yourbffsuser: although…. you’re so right. we’re both so cute 😍
-> bff2user: exactly we are 😘😍
landonorris: when you said you’d post me i wasn’t expecting just my torso…. don’t worry pookie, my side hoes aren’t following you. no need to hide me. 😘
-> danielricciardo: yes tf we are.
-> yourusername: JAIL FOR BOTH OF YOU! 😭
-> yourbffsuser: THIS IS UR MAN? 😭
-> landonorris: yass 😘😍
-> yourbffsuser: god… the men you put on this earth to provide and protect are using kissy emojis on the internet. 😔
2K notes · View notes