#my last entry was from my birthday 3 months ago

[the-clari-net]

i wrote in my journal last night.

i filled out two pages

#personal #this is my fall season #my last entry was from my birthday 3 months ago

[sophietv]

It's not about kaylor but I really want to know about the song all too well. Who is it about? I think Jake G was PR. And the lyrics doesn't fit the Taymily narrative either. This song and the relationship seems very important to her. It hurt her badly. I am asking you because you always make very informative and reliable post that makes sense and closest to the truth.

Also who is Dear John about? Is it really John Mayer? Her only straight relationship I believe in is Joe Jonas.

Hi!

Thank you sooo much for saying that! It means a lot. I really can't claim that my theories are always 1000% right, but I do make a lot of research before posting, and try to cross check everything.

2. I must admit that when you asked the question, I did not have real solid theories or evidence to give you. I was even bending toward telling you that the song might be about Lizz since the timestamp of the song on Spotiy is 5:27 = Lizz birthday.

3. Considering that Taylor wrote this during Speak Now Era and that Lizz was present during that Era, well it doesn't fit the narrative of the song being about a relationship that has ended some time ago. And also, it would have been really weird to write this song during rehearsal where Lizz was present, if it was about her...

But thanks to you! I did a lot of research to try and find evidences (I read all the timelines but I'm not that well verse in what came before Kaylor and Swiftgron).

I asked what my groupchat thought about this.

Re-read the Taymily Masterpost (X)

Read and watched Taymily interviews

And now! I can say with more confidence, that I'm pretty sure this song is about Emily Poe, her fiddle player that worked with her from 2006-2008.

Now. Here's the evidences:

First. As pointed out by my group chat, the song does not seem to fit Tayliz dynamic. It seems to be talking about a complicated relationship with someone older.

As by the lyrics "you said if we were closer in age, maybe it would have been fine"

So first thing I did is look back as to when it was written.

Here's a piece of interview I found:

Thanks to this post: (X)

We know that she wrote it during her reheasal in 2011.

Because here's when David Cook started working with her:

And here's the date of his first show in the Phillipines:

February 2011....

Then, I did a little digging on what was going on with Emily at the time:

And oh does it get interesting!!

Here's an Emily's interview I found (X)

And here's what she was doign in February 2011!!! (I'm excited of the evidence I've found, does it show lol) :

"Two thousand eleven was a big year for me. I became engaged in February, graduated law school in May, took the bar in July, and Eli and I were married in November.”

What did Taylor said?: "I was feeling terrible about what was going on in my personal life"

What if she just learned about Emily's engagement???

And to make it even more interesting. Here's a journal entry with the first lyrics of All Too Well:

Confirming that it was written in 2011.

This is inchteresting.

But it gets better!

Because, before last year, Emily's Pinterest was public. And on her wedding board, she did save a picture with a red scarf....

It's not Emily, it's just a picture that she had saved in her Pinterest. Thanks to Kate for giving me this!

But what if the red scarf was really just to tie the song to Jake???

Here's another interesting thing I've found in the Taymily timeline:

This letter is from the video she made to Emily when she left, with everyone having "I love you Emily" signs.

It says:

“Emily– I feel as if our relationship has been taken to the next level over the past few months and with much contemplation I decided I would bestow upon you one of my most prized possession: my flamingo bandana. This is a 3rd generation family heirloom and i suggest you frame it. I think it will look perfect in your apartment with the cat pillows. Enjoy”

Inchteresting....is the red scarf a bandana??

Also. We know that All Too Well was really significant for Taylor and that for a long time, she was not able to sing it without crying...

So it's about a relationship that had a big impact on her life.

Very recently. Like in June, Taylor performed the song Breathe as a surprise song and very clearly cried during that performance.

The next day, we learned that the day before the show, Emily did this post on Facebook:

Breathe was heavily rumored to be about Emily back when Fearless came out. But Colbie confirmed it with Fealess Taylor's Version in an interview when she said that it was about something that was going on with one of Taylor's band membre.

So yeah... this would make way more sense being about Emily and having Taylor be emotional singing it for a long time.

Than the song being about a relationship that lasted 3 months.

Of course I can't know for sure for all her relationships...

But most of them I believe was PR. Like the one she had with Jake.

Thanks for the question! It was really interesting doing all those research!

ADDITION!! : It just hit me but! The line "And you call me up again just to break me like a promise"

Fits perfectly with Emily calling her to tell her about the engagement! omg...

SECOND ADDITION: This morning when I woke up, I thought about two things that points to Emily!

1. Taylor turned 21 in 2010, 2 months before writing All Too Well.

"And you call me later and say sorry I didn't make it and I say I'm sorry too" from The Moment I Knew

to two months later:

"And you called me up again just to break me like a promise"

2. The night Taylor sang Breathe and looked devastated after Emily's Facebook post. She also sang All Too Well looking REALLY MAD.

People have all noted it.

Look: (X)

This solidifies even more that All Too Well is about Emily for me...

#gaylor #lgbetty #gaylor twitter #gaylor swift #gaylor theory #taymily #anon ask

[takearisk-xo]

idk guys things are just weird

this is going to be a very chaotic and disorganized Personal Post (sorry in advance)

i know this is silly and i don't owe anyone anything, but i genuinely feel so sad that i don't have anything to contribute or post today on harry's birthday.

something is up with my writing and i can't quite put my finger on it.. harry and ginny are being...very soft and not in a way that is in-character or plot driven. things are just off. all my plans i have in my head are literally flying out the window everytime i sit down to write and i don't trust if it is the right decision for the story or just some weird mood i'm in that's manifesting in a really out of character tone on the page.

i suppose it could be a couple different things. i haven't met with my therapist in two weeks so my brain could just be overloaded with other crap that i need to process and or decompress before my writing thoughts feel organized again.

my husband has been massively stressed out because of many different things going on in his life separate from our family and so i've been going a little over the top trying to be there for him.

our daughter hasn't been sleeping all that well and she's been fighting a virus/cold for going on about two weeks that i think we are finally on the tail end of.

work for me is bleh. i don't enjoy what i'm doing right now. we are in one of those cycles that is all reporting and data entry and retention analysis and its so boring and just not at all what fulfills me from this position. however in the same vein, the semester is right around the corner so it's also the last push to make sure everything is ready to go for when students return to campus.

i killed a spider today which is like a very big deal for me. i am deathly afraid of spiders and my good friends can attest that when confronted with one i dissolve into a lot of screaming and sweating and general panic. so i def think i am experiencing the aftermath of an adrenaline rush even though that was like five hours ago.

all of this is to say, i think i need a break from wips. specifically already gone and the entire the path from you universe. i feel like this past month has just been me forcing something that doesn't need to be forced. i think if i take a step back from both stories, and quit putting so much pressure on myself, my head will clear and things will start falling into place.

this week is @corneliaavenue-ao3's ficfest! and i hope this will be a really good way to bring to life some of these soft moments that keep trying to knock down the door and also keep me in the habit of writing. i don't want to put a timeline on it and somehow set an expectation for myself or anyone else but i'm guessing you can expect a two/three week longer hiatus for those two stories, and you can probably expect a fair amount of random one shots and/or drabbles from me in the meantime.

i'm sorry if this is disappointing, i can promise it is just as disappointing for me. i miss having a clear head and the words flowing effortlessly. i hope someday i get that back, but for now, i'm going to hope a little time away from those plots helps settle the static that lives inside my head.

as always, thanks for reading and understanding <3

#personal #tldr: expect a two or three week longer break on the wips #my brain just isn't cooperating right now #and i need to take a step back #but you can expect and enjoy some fun randomness in the meantime

[rainedragon]

I usually post Lolibrary content on the site's facebook page, and not my personal Tumblr, but this is a little more personal. This is my 5,000th Lolibrary entry. Lolibrary celebrated it's 13th birthday last month, and as of right this second we have 84,951 published entries.

I did the math a couple days ago for a post on the FB or twitter, and for lolibrary as a whole, it comes out to something wild like 17 entries per day. And that is 'counting' the fairly long time around 2018 when we couldn't make entries at all.

I'm not the biggest contributor to lolibrary. That is Onlyeasy, who entered more than 1/5th of the content on lolibrary and recently has retired from being an active senior lolibrarian. Followed by our late founder, Amethystcitrine. Amy entered more than 1/10th of the content currently on lolibrary. Lately, I was thinking 'I should record some videos on how to add measurements' because that seems to trip up a lot of new contributors. And, I keep thinking about the videos she made, which makes me really miss being able to talk to her about lolibrary.

The 3rd biggest contributor to lolibrary is theladymienshao (9.22%) who currently enters Baby/Pirates, and then Sucre-Dolls (6.94%) who enters Angelic Pretty. I am so impressed by the constant updates of the new items, because I've never been able to do that.

The person with the next most entries is azuki-mikan (pita-tenshi), again, absolutely fantastic, azuki-mikan has made 7.3% of the entries.

And then me, I'm 6th with 5.88% of the entries. So, I'm definitely not the most active when it comes to entering items. I do some other things with lolibrary, like I make most of the Facebook and Twitter posts (which is why they are very inconsistent). I also count up when an indie brand goes over the minimum threshold for tag, and the minimum threshold for being promoted to a brand, and then recently I've been manually moving the entries across for those too. I also did a lot of the manual checking on the shoe entries when we imported those in recently, and like all the other senior lolibrarians who are active, I do some of the pending submission approvals. And of course, I do some degree of book research & scanning with my magazine & catalog collection, some degree of item identification, etc. I also spend a lot of my time adding images to existing partial listings to flesh them out. But there are other people who do other tasks that aren't entering items too. Like Sage-Blossom who does a ton of corrections & tag clean up work, for example. And our development team who do the coding, and one of our other admins who handles all of the legal and financial pieces so we can pay our bills and maintain our status as a non-profit. And then there are a lot more very active contributors too! I think one of my favorite things about lolibrary is that it is a community project and it is made up of lots of people doing lots of different things. I think also that's one of the reasons that lolibrary has had the longevity it has had. And through it, I've met a lot of wonderful people who I absolutely think the world of. So, I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm very glad that lolibrary exists, and I hope it continues on for many years to come. <3

#Lolibrary #personal #p.s. if you want to make lolibrary entries #send me a chat for a discord invite #unless you already are in our discord #in which case #you are a cool person #also shout out to sucre-dolls who pulled the stats on top contributors #I recalculated some of them #but I used that list as a base

[charlottehuff]

As you guys know (by "you guys" I mean the two people who read my post) due recent life events (read: small mental breakdown and new T. Swift album) I have made the terrible decision to start talking to my ex-situationship again (well technically we were never not talking, we just talked way way way less than we did before).

And here I compiled a list of funny and/or ironic things about this whole situation:

We still have a Spotify fusion playlist from when we went on the car, and because our music tastes are so different, there are usually only a couple songs that belong to the both of us. So yesterday I check and the only song in common was New Rules by Dua Lipa, which is just hilariously iconic

When we were "together" I tried to get him to listen to Folklore and Evermore cause he likes that kind of indie music sometimes and I thought it would be could to enjoy them together. He never did. But this past week I have been raging on so much about Tay Tay, that I mentioned again he might like some songs and he asked for 3 recommendations to give it a try. This man not only admitted he quite liked them but proceeded to give me individual analysis of each of them and talk about what they meant and that stuff. THE AUDACITY TO DO THAT NOW!!!

One of the songs was Tolerate it, which is casually one of the songs I listened to and cried to on repeat back in November when we broke up. He did not make the connection to our very one-sided effort relationship.

Today I got him to listen to The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived, and before listening he made the following joke "A song name after me haha". He was making a joke about his dick. But for different reasons he could not be more right.

He also had the audacity to like it and quote back to me one of my favourite lyrics in it.

I have now made a playlist with all the ones I think he might enjoy and honestly the amount of them that I have cried with because of him is ironically high

A few days ago he made a memory muscle mistake and called me Sweetie, and then I didn't respond and he profoundly apologised and like, I just completely changed the subject cause how do you answer that?

He also forgot my birthday last month and I am still kinda salty about that even tho we were barely talking but like... He could have remembered... (That one's on me, I'm aware)

Anyway, here is today's public diary entry cause why the hell not, what's the worst that could happen? This goes viral? Hell no!

If you've made it this far, thank you. But also... Why?

#situationships #ex #i might destroy my mental stability but I will do it with joy and laughter #tay tay #taylor swift

[pixelated-stories]

This work has been copy-pasted straight from ao3! If you would like to read it there, click here, otherwise, I hope you enjoy it!!!!!

Pokémon: Heart of Gold Edition

(A Dave and Bambi x Pokémon crossover fanfic thingie)

First | Prev | Next

CHAPTER 1: SPECIAL PRESENT

>Enter a command here

>help

admin grant, texts, characters, vault, pkmn

>texts

1-16, pkmn 1-???

>pkmn texts 1

Processing….

> Log entry #1 - Date: 6-12-2X15 - Location: Dave's House

 A few months after the festival, in the middle of Fort Geraldson...

There was a big blue house, with gates all around the sides and the backyard. Out of the many residents, 3 were the most notable: Dave, a twenty-six-year-old ex-algebra teacher, who is in a wheelchair because he lost his legs below the knees in an accident.

Dave’s adopted son, Tristan, a newly turned ten-year-old with weirdly shaped eyes and hair that is the word "hair" spelled out on top of his head.

Last but not least Bambi, a short-tempered, stubborn, stupid, but genuine and honest farmer, he has a Brazilian accent as he speaks Portuguese but he speaks in broken English around Dave, Tristan, and their friends, he has two floating hands with no arms, he sits at two feet tall, and is thirty-six years old

They were celebrating a special day, for the special boy known as Tristan. His birthday had been recent, and the way he chose to celebrate was with some of his friends, namely Spike, Playrobot, and Ruby Man. They were all outside having fun while playing tag, the sounds of their laughter (and Spike's playful insults) could be heard from inside the house, filling Dave's heart with warmth, it's been a few months since his last… incident, specifically, the one that happened at Tristan's 9th birthday.

1 year ago…

Dave wheeled to the open front door to shout, "Kids! Come on in, it's almost time!" The group stopped playing and immediately raced to the door.

Before they entered, Samuel, Dave's green alien friend stood in the way, holding a finger up, "No running, you kids could fall and get very hurt, we don't want that to happen to the birthday boy or any of his friends, okay?" He told them monotonously.

The group of kids, which consisted of Tristan, Spike, Diamond Man, and Playrobot sighed, but they all nodded with an "Okaaaay…" 

Sam nodded with a smile, stepping aside to let them enter. They were chatting at the table, speculating about what type of presents Tristan would get. Dave was in another room, so the details of their conversation were fuzzy, but he could remember that they were hyper.

After a few minutes, Dave got ready, came out, and wheeled towards the table while holding the cake out, its lit candles were shaped like the number 9, the kids quieted themselves as Dave took in a breath and began singing

.

.

.

"Happy Birthday-" He didn't notice it because he had his eyes closed, but Dave had been teleported somewhere, in the middle of his singing, so when he opened his eyes, he saw that he was in an entirely different, yet horrifyingly familiar place, "To… you?" 

He looked around, his vision was filled with 3D geometrical shapes floating aimlessly, that nightmarish grayish-red sky. He was in the dreaded 3D realm, a place he wanted to forget. He shakily looked up at the sky, and saw a symbol in the shape of a lizard-like eye…

--

His flashbacks were cut off when someone spoke to him with a familiar Brazilian accent "Yo Dave, are you alright?" The person asked.

Dave jolted in his wheelchair, looking beside him, it was just Bambi, "Oh my god, you scared the digits out of me, Bambi," Dave said, sighing with relief that it was Bambi.

"Ah. Sorry Dave, but you were staring at wall, and you look sad," Bambi told him in his broken English.

Dave chuckled, putting on a half-genuine smile, Bambi's too gullible to tell the difference between a real one and a fake one anyway.

"Yeah, I'm just tired, been working real hard on Tristan's presents, and hiding them. He always tries to sneak his presents before Christmas, or his birthday." Dave crossed his arms.

Last year, he had gotten 10 presents for Tristan's 9th birthday, but the rascal stole them all the day before. Thankfully, Tristan didn't open any of the presents, and despite the stress it caused, it was fun, teaching him that he reeeeaallly needs to work on tuning his wheelchair. 

"But other than being nervous that Tristan won't like these gifts, I'm fine. How are things holding up for you?" Dave asked, “Are you going to bring anything?”

Bambi nodded rapidly, "Yeah! I bringing my quiche!" he announced. Dave almost gasped, but he did a "pog" face instead, due to Bambi's quiche being famous, at least in this friend group.

Bambi's. Quiche. Is. THE best thing in the world, Dave swears it is.

He was unsure if that was okay to bring to a birthday party though, Dave asked this out loud, to which Bambi simply answered; "Well, 1. People like my quiche, even though I don't like it much, and 2. Your stomach is bad at sweets, I remember you tell me that." Ah, he did, Dave blushed a little, it was a little embarrassing that Bambi just– said it with no hesitation, but he was right.

"Awww, thanks Bambi, you didn't have to, I appreciate it," Dave said with an actual genuine smile.

Bambi smiled back, his hands on his hips, "No problem, Dave. Well, I going to go back to waiting for quiche be done, I bet you have many birthday thing to do, bye Dave!" He waved, and Dave waved back before Bambi turned and left.

Dave smiled for a bit longer before it slipped to a slight frown, he hoped that the incident wouldn’t happen again, and if it does, he hoped it won’t be in front of Tristan. He doesn't know if he’d drag Tristan to the 3D realm with him again. God, that… that thing in his dreams turned out to be real. He still remembers what it looked like, it was some corrupted reflection of him, only its skin was black, its 'clothes' were inverted to be red instead of his blue, and instead of regular eyes, all it had was 1 (one) lizard-like eye. He doesn't know why, but seeing it in person for the first time sent the worst chills down his spine.

Dave shook his head, he didn't need to linger on it, he needed to keep those memories locked away for the safety of his child, and hopefully keep him away from that horrible prophecy.

He sighed, leaning back in his wheelchair, 'Man, who knew that the consequences for trying to get rid of this world-destroying curse would be this bad.' He thought bitterly, a laugh escaping his lips for a second before he stopped, sagging down further, "That… wasn't funny." He laughed again, he couldn't help it, his situation would make anyone else insane, the only reason he has a drop of sanity left is his son…

'That's right, I shouldn't be so down right now, I have my son’s birthday to take care of.' 

Dave was reinvigorated with the determination to keep his child safe and happy. After all, making sure Tristan knew he was loved is what this special present is for.

–

The sun had almost set, and the kids were playing Mario Kart inside, Dave was watching over them from the kitchen, and Diamond Man was watching behind the couch. The last lap ended with Tristan in 1st place, despite Playrobot being the best (Tristan 2nd best). Spike stood up and pointed at Playrobot, "You let Tristan win, didn't you?" His accusation didn’t have any actual bite.

"Tristan won through skill and luck," She denied with a smile. 

Spike crossed his arms with a pout, "Don't give me that shi-" He suddenly felt dread crawl up his spine, feeling the gaze of a father deep in his soul making him freeze, "Uh- uh lie, I mean lie." He corrected with sweat dripping down his forehead. He caught himself before he swore, and felt the pressure go away immediately, man, adults are scary.

"Why are you complaining about letting people win when you were dead last?" Tristan interjected, a neutral expression on his face.

Spike let out a 'ghk' sound, a hint of red fading in his cheeks, "That's beside the point, nerd, the bot let you win 'cause you're the birthday boy!" Spike exclaimed. 

"Or because you suck," D-Man's loud voice cut in with a smirk.

"That's it-" Spike stood up, giving chase with a furious expression, "I'll *show you* who sucks!" Spike yelled.

Diamond Man ran away from Spike effortlessly, being tall and lanky has its advantages, such as being able to run really fast, "C'mon dude, you've never ever caught me in tag, how are you gonna get me-"

"Kids!" Dave's call made them stop, "It's tiiime!~"

"CAAAAAKE!!!!" And they all rushed in.

"Whoever's last is the rotten egg!" said Spike. Dave shook his head with a smile, kids, am I right?

–

(Playrobot is last, she was forced to wear the rotten egg hat :pensive:)

Dave prepared himself before entering the kitchen from the closet with the cake in hand, the wick on the number 10-shaped candle lit. Putting on his best smile, the kids waited in silence, man he's so nervous- good nervous, but nervous. He's been taking care of Tristan nearly since he was born, and to still have him with him for birthdays is enough to almost break him down into tears. He took a shaky breath, setting the cake down to wipe the tears welling up. Once he was ready, he picked the cake back up and turned the lights off.

"Happy birthday to you~" Dave softly sang as he entered the room, revealing the cake for everyone to see. It was a pretty big cake, decorated with soft gold-colored frosting, swirls of red frosting framed the edges, a giant gold heart sitting just left of the center, a candle shaped like the number 1 lay flat beside it, and red icing written out to say 'Happy Birthday Tristan'.

(DRAWN BY @mintyfreshartist)

It was safe to say that this cake was decorated with the utmost care in the entire world. "Happy birthday to you!~" Dave repeated, wheeling closer to the table at a slow pace, he could practically feel his heart swell 18459308495034 times bigger than before!!!

"Happy birthday dear my sooooonnn~" He placed the cake on the table as he ended the note.

"Happy birthday to yooooouuuu~" Dave repeated one final time, a big, stupid smile on his face. Tristan stared in awe at the cake, his heart speeding up as he could just- just- feel the love poured into this birthday specifically. 

Tristan felt himself being nudged, he looked to his side, and looked up to Spike smiling softly, "Come on nerd, make your wish already." He whispered. Tristan nodded and looked back to the cake, closing his eyes, thinking up his wish…

'Thank you, to whoever heard my wish last year, dad's been so much happier than the last few birthdays, he also seems less tired, and although he’s busy building something, he doesn't appear to overwork himself anymore… also don't tell anyone I said that.' Tristan opened his eyes, taking in a deep breath. 'This year though, whatever he was building, he wouldn’t let me see, he always said it was a surprise for later, but it would be soon. Anyways, I'm grateful for having such an awesome dad, awesome friends, and an awesome life, there's nothing better I could wish for.' Tristan blew out all the candles, signaling he was done with his wish of sorts.

Dave plucked all the candles from the cake, setting them aside, and he cut Tristan a slice of cake, while Bambi arrived a little late. It was evident that his quiche was fresh from the oven, as it was still steaming hot. Tristan thanked Bambi for making it, and that he was glad Bambi was here with more food. Cake and quiche for a birthday, at least it was a good quiche, Bambi appreciated all of the praise he got from it. 

Dave ate half a plate of the quiche, god knows how his stomach would react if he took only two tiny bites of cake, so he didn't serve himself any. He left the kitchen to get Tristan's presents. There were 4 this time around instead of 10, but what he got was:

A Giratina plush

Super Smash Bros Ultimate

Pokémon Scarlet

And a drone (He loves drones)

All the things a young boy could wish for.

Tristan was super happy about the gifts he got, hugging his dad so hard he almost popped, all that sappy stuff.

–

> Location: The 3D Realm - [̶̡̺̬̟̯̺͎̯͗͋̉D̸̢̦̱̞͒̿̋̈́̾A̷͈̎̈́͆T̴̛͖͇Ã̸̛̦̦͈̿̊̃͛̽ ̴̨̨̤̤͙͎͌͋͒̑Ë̶̢̡̹͉̩͎̮́̀X̵̢͖̪̙͓̉P̴̢̦͑̋̿̄̎̆̕U̵̱̺͑̉̃̏N̵͙̲̹͈̞̞͒̿͋̒́̄̂͜ͅG̶̮͕̈́̑E̸̳̯͕̐͌̒̿̆̀D̵͔̖̖͉̈́̌̋̂̓́͝͝]̶̭͙̫̄'̶̠̗̗̙̞͚̠̽̀͊̋̊̂͝s̴̩̱̲͙͖͆͒̆́̓̐̀͛ ̴̺͈͈̀̌̇̓ chunk - <INTERMISSION>

[̶̡̺̬̟̯̺͎̯͗͋̉D̸̢̦̱̞͒̿̋̈́̾A̷͈̎̈́͆T̴̛͖͇Ã̸̛̦̦͈̿̊̃͛̽ ̴̨̨̤̤͙͎͌͋͒̑Ë̶̢̡̹͉̩͎̮́̀X̵̢͖̪̙͓̉P̴̢̦͑̋̿̄̎̆̕U̵̱̺͑̉̃̏N̵͙̲̹͈̞̞͒̿͋̒́̄̂͜ͅG̶̮͕̈́̑E̸̳̯͕̐͌̒̿̆̀D̵͔̖̖͉̈́̌̋̂̓́͝͝]̶̭͙̫̄ was floating around the area he had claimed, the area around her had a grayish-red hue, surrounded by floating geometric cubes, he had minions shaped like T̶̡̞̪̠̞̣̍̔H̴̢̛̠̏̎̃̆͠Ẻ̵̛̼̻͈̹̜̣̱̂ ̶͉͊͒̆͠L̶͈̤͖͉̫̼̦̫̈́͊͒̒̅Ọ̷̱̜̱̘̬͂̈́̚R̵̭͕͌̉̏̏̆̿D̶̰̮̫̪̗͋̈̐͜, Bambi, small, adorable, weak, but strong in numbers. 

After their inspiration, they were dubbed “Bambi minions.” She had a wicked grin on his face 24/7, spreading wide enough to go from one hypothetical ear to the next, skin as black as the night sky, and what appeared to be her clothes, were blood red, consisting of cones and cylinders. To top it all off, she had an unusual eye, a lizard-like eye. Though he was always plotting his next move, he felt… Different today, like something major was happening, and before she knew it, she whispered out [HAPPY BIRTHDAY, GOLDEN NUSIANCE]

–

> Location: Dave's house - Time: 9:51 PM

It was time for everyone visiting Dave's House to leave, they were tired from playing all day, and cleaning up their mess, they wanted to go back home to sleep, and as they all left Dave called Tristan to the living room, figuring it was to tell Tristan to get ready to go to bed and stuff, he went there.

"Son, you know that project I've been working on and didn't let you see what I was working on?" Dave asked with his hands behind his back. 

Tristan raised an eyebrow, tilting his head a little, "Yeah, why?" Why was Dave bringing this up now? 

"Well… I've finished it, and I was planning on saving it for your 10th birthday!" Dave said, feeling warm inside when Tristan gasped excitedly, his face lighting up with a big smile. 

"REALLY!?" He almost squeaked in disbelief. 

Dave nodded, showing Tristan his hands. It was a square pyramid the size of an orange in one hand, a big remote in the other, "I call this one the ‘Inter-Universal Dislocator’, or IUD, I may change it to something else in the future, but using a few my special powers, we can go to any world we want!" Dave explained, Tristan lit up at the mention of "Any world we want.” Dave went on to continue "Exce-"

"CAN WE GO TO THE POKÉMON UNIVERSE!?!?!?" Tristan nearly screeched the boy was damn near vibrating with energy from excitement.

Dave chuckled at his son's energy, but… as much as Dave liked Pokémon (He and Tristan went Pokémon Go-ing together sometimes), he was, unfortunately going to have to tell Tristan that it was just fiction, and a world like that doesn't exist… If he had the heart to. 

Dave instead decided to indulge Tristan just this once, "Hmm… Okay! We can try it out!" Dave placed the Pyramid away from any objects, and his remote turned into a keyboard. "Alright Tristan, stay back!" Dave warned, and Tristan listened. Dave began to type.

"I'M GONNA GO GET SOME STUFF IN A BAG BE RIGHT BACK," Tristan ran off to his room to do what he said.

Dave chuckled, wishing he could be as excited as Tristan. He began typing...

> awaiting command

>open portal from ███,███ to ███,███

Dave was expecting it to fail when he hit enter…

>command processing

Awaiting power to begin creating the portal

What?

Did- was- was this real? Dave gripped the two handles and began using his powers with slow control.

>Absorbing power…

10%

'No way this was actually working,' Dave denied, but he pressed on, watching the percent increase…

20%

50%

90%

100%

>Power requirement completed, creating portal.

Dave stopped immediately, 5 minutes of pure concentration was exhausting, he needed to take a breather. It was shortly after that when space distorted the area in front of them contorting it into a spiral, time around them gripped the swirl of space, and ripped it into a hole, opening a blue portal above the pyramid, everything behind it seemed like there wasn't a scratch thankfully but… 'Holy polynomial, it worked? It WORKED!? Is- Is Pokémon a real universe? What? I-'

Dave's existential crisis was cut off by Tristan, "WOAH, DAD THIS IS SUCH A COOL PRESENT!!" He tackled Dave into a hug, almost knocking him off his wheelchair, "I LOVE YOU SO MUCH DAD, YOU'RE THE COOLEST!!!"

"Tristan, wait!" Ah- tangent, the words left his mouth too late, Tristan ran off, bag in hand.

No matter, it was time to see if this is real or not. Dave wheeled up to the portal, using the springs he built in his wheelchair to let him jump into the portal.

–

> Location: The Pokemon World - Region: Sinnoh, Route unknown

A portal opened up in the middle of the forest, and out stepped two humans, Tristan, and Dave. Dave immediately placed a 2nd pyramid below the manifested portal to ensure stabilization. As he took in his surroundings, he could hardly believe his eyes.

Dave saw Pokémon, real Pokémon in-person.

–

> Location: Dave's house

Bambi was still hanging around Dave's house, he passed out in Tristan's room and only woke up due to a loud noise somewhere else. He was all pissy that his nap was interrupted, rubbing his eyes, and grumbling in Portuguese. He found it strange that no one was around, not even the owner or his son. So Bambi wandered the house, calling for anybody until he stumbled into the living room, eyes finding the still-active portal.

"What… The fuck?" Bambi murmured to himself, approaching the portal, "Did Dave make this?" He said before he stepped too close and got sucked into the portal. 

He was midway into transportation when he saw something on the other side, Dave and Tristan! He was almost there before Dave shut the portal behind them, trapping Bambi in the middle of transport.

A sudden, unexplained terror struck through Bambi's heart, his hands glowed white, rainbow flames coating his hand, instinctively making a slicing motion in the air, a long, thin shockwave flew from the motion a short distance before it dissipated, a portal tore itself into existence right before him, perfect for him to fall through.

Where he'd end up would be completely different from where Dave and Tristan were…

> Location: Hoenn.

End of Log Entry #1

First | Prev | Next

#dave and bambi #pokemon #my writing #I am NOT tagging every character #Sorry pokemon fandom if you come across this #i recommend reading the ao3 version it has better formatting and grnmmdmcfmmg #I'M STILL HYPER ABOUT THE CAKE AAAA I LOVE IT #Dave is NOT okay PLEASE give him hugs #Also please leave criticism either here or in ao3 comments grhdjkfgm

[thatwouldbee-enough]

Another December Prompt

@til-true sent this one as a reply <3

lams x family

Went with some bendies for this one <333

---

“Merry Christmas!” 

His family’s house is decorated more than it ever was growing up, and John can only attribute that to Jemmy and Polly, the last of his siblings to still be living at home. Both of his youngest siblings had never lacked in holiday spirit, and it shows now in the garland wrapped all the way down the bannister of the grand staircase in the entry way, the wreaths covering not only the front door, but also the windows, the way the outside of the house is perfectly lined in soft yellow Christmas lights. 

Speak of the devils, both of them appear not a minute after he calls out into the house, along with several of his nieces scampering in close behind. Eli and Ellie immediately make a break for it, chasing after their cousins as they disappear into another room before John or Alex have a chance to take off their coats. 

Frances huffs a sigh, shrugging off her own new coat. She’s been growing like a weed over the last year. John is just glad that with the whole crop of children his sister seems to be creating, he at least has someone to pawn off all the clothes she’s outgrown onto. 

Martha herself hurries into the entryway a moment later, looking decidedly stressed as she calls back into the kitchen at another one of her kids, warning them not to eat any of just-out-of-the-oven cookies. 

They all hug and say hello, even Alex, though he hangs back a little and waits until John’s family comes to him. It’s certainly an improvement from the first years they did this at least. 

Martha wraps their daughter in a big hug, earning a grumble from Frances, but she smiles and hugs her aunt back. 

“Hey kiddo. How’s it going?”

“You just saw me two weeks ago,” she mutters, squirming out of the hug.

“That’s the Christmas spirit.” Martha beams as Francis rolls her eyes and allows Polly to pull her aside to catch up, the two girls being, somewhat ridiculously, closer in age that most of Frances’s cousins are to her. “She’s getting so big,” she says to John, once Frances and Polly have retreated into some other room. 

“I know. She’s already competing at level 10.”

“...not everything needs to be measured in gymnastics standards, you know.”

Alex laughs while John throws his sister an unamused look. “Well excuse me, but you would too if you were in the gym with her every day of the week.”

“When your newborn pops out,” Alex interjects, “I’m going to start referring to it as a level 0.” 

Martha laughs, shaking her head good naturedly. 

Henry finally rounds the corner a moment later, a new cane steadying his steps. “Sorry,” he says, “Davie was showing me the new remote control car that Santa brought him.”

“Santa spent way too much on things that will probably be broken in a couple of weeks,” Martha muttered under her breath. 

“Dad,” John greeted, pulling him into an awkward hug, ovelry careful not to upset his balance, “Merry Christmas.” 

“Merry Christmas, Henry,” Alex echoed, opting for a polite nod and a smile. 

“Merry Christmas, boys.” He craned his neck, looking about the entryway. “Where are my grandkids?”

“You’re getting too slow for them,” Martha chuckled. “God knows where they all got off to. Probably tearing your house apart as we speak.”

“They certainly better not be,” Henry said sternly, though he couldn’t help but smile. “Well, come on in, then. We have some appetizers set out. Drinks in the fridge.” 

“I picked up some IPAs on the way back from school.”

John turned towards his little brother, eying the can in his hand. “There’s no way you’re old enough to drink.”

“I turned twenty-one last month! You knew that!” 

John raised his brows. “I knew you had a birthday. No way it was your twenty-first.”

“Swear to God.”

“You are making me feel ridiculously old right now.”

“You feel old?” Henry chuckled. 

“Okay, fair point.” 

They all followed Henry into the living room where an array of appetizer trays had been set out on the coffee table, John taking a the loveseat with Alex as they all gathered around, the television set to one of those fake fireplace streams. 

“So, how are the kids?”

“They’re good. Ellie and Eli are doing well in kindergarten, according to their teacher.”

“If you ignore the fact that Eli is apparently biting the other kids,” Alex added, “and Ellie has picked up some not so nice words from one of the other little heathens at school and won’t stop repeating them.”

John rubs a tired hand over his face, and Henry laughs. “They sound more like they could be your sister’s children than yours.”

Martha scoffs, picking a carrot from one of the trays. “Rude.”

Ignoring her, Henry continues, “And Frances?”

“She’s doing great. I was worried with all of the time she spends on gymnastics we’d have to worry more about her grades but–”

“She’s a perfectionist,” Alex finished for him, hint of exasperation in his voice. Ironic, all things considered. “She stresses herself out over her grades before we ever get the chance.”

“Well I’m glad she’s doing well,” Henry told them with a fond smile. “When’s the next meet?”

“Not until after the holidays. Second week of January.” John taps the screen of his phone, already pulling the information up. “I’ll send you the event info.” 

“Thank you.”

—

Later, once the Christmas ham is out of the oven and everyone’s plates are piled with deliciously fattening foods, John glances down the table, then over to the kids table, tacked on at the end. It’s hard to believe how much their family has grown, how much things have changed, over the last several years. If someone had asked him all those years ago, he would have never imagined the holidays could feel like this. Would never have thought Alex would be welcomed in so completely. Never could have imagined having kids of their own, never mind all of the nieces and nephews running around. Seeing Martha’s kids playing with their own always felt a little strange. Like, how did they get here? John and his sister were just kids themselves not too long ago. 

And the biggest surprise, all these years later, was the change the years seemed to instill in his father. With each new grandchild, he seemed to grow more and more indulgent. John almost wants to laugh, watching him now. Part of him thinks it’s not fair. It would almost be easier, knowing Henry’s stubborn discipline was some immutable trait rather than something that would fade with time and growing sentimentality. 

But that hardly mattered when he watched him with the kids after dinner, passing out presents to every single one of them and glowing with pride. 

Perhaps it wasn’t fair, but that didn’t stop it from being good now. 

And as he leaned against Alex’s shoulder, watching Frances open up a brand new journal with a big smile on her face, he couldn’t help but be perfectly content with the world and the family they had grown into. 

---

On AO3 here :)

#lams #bendy boys #bendies 💜 #john laurens #alexander hamilton #john laurens/alexander hamilton #fanfiction #gymnastics au #christmas fic #my writing

[kaleidodreams]

I posted 9,166 times in 2022

54 posts created (1%)

9,112 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@sailor-moon-rei

@moonlightsdreaming

@miyakuli

@story-kat

@lou-is-lurking

I tagged 298 of my posts in 2022

#sailor moon - 47 posts

#question - 44 posts

#yuri!!! on ice fanfiction - 38 posts

#yuri!!! on ice - 37 posts

#fanfiction - 35 posts

#sailor moon fanfiction - 35 posts

#questions - 26 posts

#heavenly pearl - 19 posts

#reblogging for otabek's birthday - 14 posts

#recs - 13 posts

Longest Tag: 108 characters

#which is actually pretty fun because my mom got the idea to nickname me meg from jo's sister in little women

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

For my second fic for Sailor Moon Rare Pair Week, I wrote a Reinako fic!

Summary:  When Minako spends the night with Rei at Hikawa, secrets are revealed and confessions are made. (FF.net)

11 notes - Posted March 28, 2022

#4

So...this story originally began as an entry I wrote for the @smquickies2022 event a few months ago. The challenge was to write a sexy fic in a thousand words or less, which I managed to do...but I wasn’t particularly fond of the result, to be honest. The entry ended up focusing almost entirely on the sex to the exclusion of everything else, so I decided to expand the story for Smutember using the Day 16 prompt of “Something New” for the original @smutember event. It can also fit under the Week 3 prompts of “First Times” and “Friends With Benefits” of Sailor Moon Smutember, hosted by @floraone. (It wasn’t Setsuna’s first threesome, but it was Usagi’s and Mamoru’s.) 

Anyway, I’ve also included the original smquickies entry (Theme: Lace) as a bonus chapter for posterity, but there’s really no reason to read it if you’ve already read this chapter...unless you really are just interested in reading the smut part. In that case...have fun!

Summary:   Looking for something new to spice up their sex life after a thousand years of marriage, Neo-Queen Serenity and King Endymion invite their good friend Setsuna into their bed for a memorable night together. (FF.net)

13 notes - Posted September 16, 2022

#3

Get To Know

Thanks for the tag, @lou-is-lurking!

Rules: tag 9 people you want to get to know/catch up with

Last movie at home: I watched Hotel Transylvania 2 last night and will probably watch the third one later tonight.

Favorite color: Black (But I also love purple, blue, and deep red!)

Last song: “Oh, Holy Night” - Mariah Carey (Hey, it’s the eleventh day of Christmas -- don’t judge!)

Sweet, savory, or spicy: Hmm, it’s tough to decide between sweet or savory... Right now, I’m leaning savory.

Currently reading: Manga-wise, Knight of the Ice, Bakuman, Wotakoi: Love Is Hard For Otaku, and the last volume of Takane & Hana. As for fanfiction, the multiparts I’ve been actively reading lately are Beneath Your Beautiful (YOI) by EmHunter and Bunnycube, The Runner-Up (SM) by @daikon1, and Puppeteer (SM) by @floraone.

Currently working on: Final edits on my last two stories for YOI Rare Pair Week (Leo/Otabek and Minako/Celestino), a Chibi-Usa/Helios fic for @sailormoonrarepairweek, and a Victuuri fic for the YOI 18+ Discord server’s 2022 Winter Olympxxx event. Oh, and my YOI Big Bang.

Don’t feel obligated if you don’t want to, but tagging: @lilliebellfanfics, @quicksilverblue, @danni-bunny, @vchanny-og, @artimas, @teamvanessacloud, @venuscrescent, @moonlightusa, and @tinacentury.

13 notes - Posted January 5, 2022

#2

Here’s a cute Victuuri story I wrote for the 2021 Yuri!!! on Ice Big Bang! The artwork was drawn by the talented dreamin.lilo, who can be found on Instagram. Check out the story to see the other two adorable pieces of artwork!

Summary:  “Well, I’ve been thinking… Don’t you think it’s time we had a baby?”

Now that the two of them have officially retired from competitive skating, Yuuri is blindsided when his husband Viktor makes known his desire for a baby. He never even considered the idea of fatherhood before, but when Yuuko calls him last minute, desperate for someone to look after the ten-year-old triplets so she and Takeshi can celebrate their wedding anniversary, they’re given the opportunity for some first-hand experience taking care of children. (FF.net)

21 notes - Posted March 24, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Here's the first story I wrote for @sailormoonrarepairweek, featuring my all-time OTP, Chibi-Usa/Helios!

Summary: Helios has the ring in his pocket and a great speech prepared, but his plans for the perfect proposal keep falling through during his big anniversary date with Serenity. (FF.net)

23 notes - Posted March 27, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

[megan-loves-surveys]

#24.

Last time you went on a rollercoaster: Last year when I went to Armageddon with my boyfriend, they had rides there and we went on the coaster.

Whose birthday is next, out of all the people you know? My boyfriend's, he's in May.

Would you eat a live cockroach if it made you a millionaire? Depends how much of a millionaire, lol.

Who do you think about most? My boyfriend and Jon Moxley xD

Do you have embarrassing parents? Not really, my parents are cool. Especially my Mum, all my friends love her haha.

Are you any good at writing? I like to think so.

What’s something that really matters to you? Music.

Do you prefer bar or liquid soap? Liquid.

Do you have high or low self esteem levels? In between.

Do you like mint or orange flavored chocolate? Orange is great, mint not so much.

How often do you get spots? Like, pimples? I get the occasional one, I'm clear probably like 90% of the time these days.

Do you prefer instrumental songs or ones with lyrics? Both! I love video game music, which is instrumental, but I love lyrics too of course.

Do you carry a bag around with you often? What does it look like? Yep, it's a green handbag, I got it like a month ago. It's so cool.

Name one of your favorite memories. So many to pick from, but I'll go with the entire trip to Orlando for Wrestlemania 33 cos the resort we stayed in was amazing (it had the nicest pool I've ever seen), we went to the WWE Performance Center (the tours to there are rare and expensive to get tickets to), I met a bunch of wrestlers (including Mox, my fave <3), we sat second row at Mania itself, we also had amazing tickets for all the other shows (including front row for Smackdown!), we did a bunch of tourist stuff and the weather was gorgeous. An all round perfect holiday.

Have you ever had braces? Do you need them? No.

Are you a subscriber to any magazines? Which? No. I used to subscribe to WWE Magazine but they stopped making it.

What is something you want but can’t afford to buy? All the Converse I want xD

Do you usually eat wheat bread or white bread, or are you gluten-free? Wheat.

Which lost friend do you most wish you could be friends with again? None if you mean 'lost' as in friends I just stopped talking to, but if you mean in general, then Zoe cos she passed away.

Do you think you would be happier if you had more money? Definitely.

What is something currently on your wishlist from Etsy? -

Is there a Target near you? We don't have it in NZ.

Which is closest to you: Target, Walmart, Kmart, or Meijer? We only have Kmart of those.

Who do you go to when you’re lonely? Or what do you do when you’re lonely? Depends.

What do you dislike about the house you live in? The complex next door is full of annoying people, the neighbours right next to us in there have 3 kids and they're loud little shits lol.

Have you ever been clubbing? Did you have fun? Yep, it's fun.

Have you ever volunteered? Yes. I've done data entry for a few charities in the past and that.

What holidays do you celebrate? Christmas & Easter.

Do you have a best friend? How long have you known them? Yep, I've known her since high school.

How often do you take selfies? It depends, sometimes loads, sometimes not that much.

What was your favorite way to spend a summer day as a kid? Playing outside, riding my bike with these girls who lived down the street from me etc.

Do you have any uncommon interests or hobbies? Depends what you consider unusual.

Have you ever drank so much that you passed out? No.

What is your favorite way to eat rice? (white, steamed, fried, brown, sweetened…) I love cheesy rice and rice with curry.

What’s your favorite horror movie? The Ring.

Have you ever had to have a tooth cut out? Yes.

What video games did you play when you were growing up? All the old school DOS games cos I'm a 90s kid - Doom, Wolfenstein 3D, Secret Agent, Crystal Caves, Commander Keen etc. All the platform games!

What pet names do you use for your friends/loved ones? I call my boyfriend babe and baby xD

What’s your favourite Disney movie? None.

Do you prefer regular or diet soft drinks? I only drink Coke Zero Sugar, so I guess the diet ones lol.

Have you ever met someone in person who you first met on the internet? Do you have plans to do that anytime soon? Yep, loads of times.

Are you a fan of garlic bread? Hell yes, gimme garlic bread.

Have you ever wanted to be vegetarian or vegan? No.

What is your boss’s (or school principal’s) name? His name's Oliver.

Do you like eggnog? I've never had it.

Do you know anyone with celiac disease? No.

Are you and your best friend complete opposites? In a lot of ways, yes. But in other ways, we're similar.

If you were to write a novel, what would it be about? A murder mystery or something.

Are you currently pretending to be someone’s friend? No.

Have you ever had a serious issue involving your eyes? My eyesight just sucks, especially my left eye, it's super blurry. Last time I got my eyes tested, they said my left eye got a tiny bit better... but my right eye got worse! SMH :/

Do you have sensitive teeth? Sorta.

What are your views on our current president? -

What is your biggest responsibility in your household? Paying bills.

Who did you last worry about and why? Myself tbh lol.

When was the last time you ate/drank something gross just to be polite? I can't do this. Depending how well I know the person, I'll just tell them I can't eat it and take what I can eat and have that. Otherwise I'll just say I'm not hungry and eat later.

Do you have a mouse for your laptop? (Assuming you have a laptop) Yep, a wireless one. It's a bit broken though, the middle scroll wheel doesn't click that well anymore.

What was your high school mascot? Lion.

What was your first job? Data entry.

Do you remember your first time? Yep.

Favourite home-cooked meal growing up? Bacon & egg pie.

What is something you don’t have any natural talent for? Maths and anything musical lol.

How do you feel about your body? It's pretty good, just need to lose my belly fat.

What are three things you like that are blue? My hair, water and denim.

What is one sad song that you enjoy listening to? Oh, there's loads.

Do you like butterflies? Love them.

Do you prefer to read fiction or non-fiction? Both.

If you have a significant other, what is his/her name? Will.

Have you ever had to use a wheelchair? Yep, when I broke my femur.

Have you ever been pulled over by a cop? No.

What are three things you would change about your body if you could? Flat stomach, longer thicker hair and feet 1 size bigger.

Who was the last person who gave you a hug? My boyfriend.

Have you ever questioned your gender? No.

What is your favorite thing to do in the snow? -

Have you ever swam in the ocean? Yes.

What were three of your favorite things to do at recess as a kid? Pretend to be popstars with my friends, play cards and just hang around and chat.

What is one thing you’ve gotten for free on your birthday? Starbucks xD

Have you ever been to Tennessee, USA? No.

What are some things that fascinate you? Geography, glitches, scams/scammers and true crime.

What did you last remember dreaming about? Hmm, not sure.

What did you last watch on TV? Big Bang Theory last night during dinner.

What is one of your toxic traits? I procrastinate.

Have you ever found a skeleton while outside? No.

Do you like meatball subs? Never had one.

What is your favorite smell on earth? Fresh bread.

If you have a sib, do you call him/her “brother” or “sister” sometimes? -

Did you ever collect stickers? I did and I still have them all! I had one particular book that I never used the stickers in them, I just collected them cos they were pretty ones. The rest I used on all sorts of shit lol.

Have you been baptized in any religious tradition? No.

Do you love the smell of sunblock? No, it smells weird.

What was the last upsetting thing that happened to you? Some bitch at work was talking down to me and treating me like shit cos we were having computer issues (the fucking reception computer strikes again...) and I couldn't check on her case for her. She basically said I was worthless cos I was "just the reception girl" and insinuated I slept with my boss to get my job. I was getting so annoyed at her and was about to snap when one of my coworkers who is super protective of everyone in the office rescued me and told the woman to fuck off.

What was the last thing you ordered from Starbucks? I got a mocha java chip frappe from there yesterday.

Do you trust your doctor? I don't have a regular doctor, when I go to the clinic I just see whoever is available.

Do you ever question if your mother loves you? Never, I know she loves me more than anything <3

What is missing in your life? Travel. I miss it.

What is your favorite type of Lunchables? Never had them.

What is the worst medication side effect you’ve ever had? Diarrhea and a bad rash. Ew.

What is your favorite thing to order at Taco Bell? I've only eaten there once or twice.

What church do you go to? -

Do you take risks often? Depends.

The last time you ate leftovers, what was it that you were eating? Pasta bake, I always have it for dinner then eat the rest the next day, I just warm it up in the microwave at work lol.

What was the last flavor of ice cream you ate? Chocolate.

What is your favorite song at the moment? Girls Aloud - Disco Bunny

What is one thing you have too much of? Hmm.

What type of fruit do you eat the most? Kiwifruit probably.

Would you rather eat strawberries or watermelon? I like both, but more strawberries.

Do you prefer hamburgers or hot dogs? The burgers.

How far away do you live from the place where you were born? I live in the same city as I was born.

If you buried a time capsule, what would you put in it? Hmm.

Describe your clothing style in three words: Wrestling, short and comfy.

What’s something you want to do more often? Travel.

Who is your favorite YouTuber? Call Me Kevin. He's hilarious, plays all sorts of games and he seems like he'd be the nicest person to know.

Do you believe in soulmates? Yes.

What band or artist do you think is overrated? I think Beyoncé is quite talented, but man her fans act like she's god.

What’s something untrue that you believed for a long time? Dunno.

Did you skateboard when you were younger? No.

Have you ever won a contest? Oh, loads. I have a knack for winning things lol. The biggest I've won is a trip to Los Angeles to attend WWE Summerslam where we got flights, a fancy hotel, tickets to the PPV and tickets to a meet and greet event. It fucking ruled. Then there was the time I won the top prize at a stand at a fair where you chose envelopes with numbers in it and my number was for a gigantic hamper xD I've also won smaller things like CDs, DVDs, posters, expensive earphones, plushies, giftcards and the like. The last thing was a 6 month subscription to a magazine website from the McDonalds Monopoly game, it was worth like 100 bucks lol.

What’s something weird you’ve eaten? Dunno.

Who is someone you would like to get to know better? Wrestlers xD

When’s that last time you saw snow? 2015 when I was in the USA, it was all piled up on the sides of the roads in Boston.

Who are the 3 people you love the most? My parents and my boyfriend.

Last person you slept in the same bed with? My boyfriend.

Have you recently been sick? No.

Would you marry someone if they were unable to have sex? I don't want to get married...

Does heartbreak really feel as bad as it sounds? Sure.

Last reason you went to the ER? I got hit by a car and broke my shoulder.

What facial cleanser do you use? I use one for acne on occasion, but only if it gets bad which doesn't happen much.

Have you ever cheated on the significant other that you have now? Noooooo.

Do your parents like your boyfriend/girlfriend? Yep. My Mum was a bit iffy on him at first cos she thought he was too old for me, but he's super charming and won her over quick, she loves him now xD My Dad liked him pretty much instantly.

What was the last fruit or vegetable you chopped/sliced up? Dunno.

Does the last person whose house you were at like anyone? Me lol.

Do you tend to talk on the phone a lot? No, only at work haha. My boyfriend and friends mostly text me or message me online lol.

What turns you on the most? Oh, loads of things.

Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex? Yep.

Have you ever suspected anyone of cheating on you? I knew they did, one of my friends saw them and immediately told me.

Ever get caught doing something naughty with your boyfriend/girlfriend? Yep xD One of his friends walked in on us, we all just died laughing.

Do you use q-tips to clean your ears? No.

Have you ever swam with dolphins? No.

If you/your gf became pregnant accidentally, would you consider abortion? Without a doubt. I don't want kids and I don't want to be pregnant.

What was the last candy you ate? Haribo.

Do you like zombie movies? They're fine.

What’s the grossest/worst thing you’ve ever seen in a public restroom? Blood everywhere.

Have you ever volunteered in a hospital? If not, would you ever want to? No.

How do you feel about runny egg yolks? The best! Hard egg yolk is so disappointing.

Have you ever hidden a relationship from your family? Yes, my first boyfriend cos I was 14 and wasn't allowed to date yet lol.

Who was the worst friend you ever had? Hmm.

When was the last time you made plans with someone? What are you going to do with that person? My Mum and I made plans to go to the Easter Show, then my boyfriend said he'd tag along as well lol.

Are you close to your extended family? Do you wish you were closer? No.

While on the road, do you play any road games? Sure.

Have you ever picked apples before? No.

Are you scared of semi-trucks? Especially when you’re driving next to one? Dunno tbh.

Do you have a fence? No, we have a stone wall around the back and side of our house, and the front is part of a gigantic open carpark in our complex.

If you have any pets, do you talk to them in a baby voice? I don't have pets, but I talk to every cat I see like that xD

Who was the last person to comfort you? My boyfriend.

Do you think that in the end, everything will fall into place? Who knows.

What was the last thing you swallowed? Water.

Do you like cats? Cats are my favourite animal, I love them so much <3

On a scale of one to ten how much do looks matter to you? 5 or 6.

What are you listening to? Little Mix - Notice

What’s the closest pink object to you? A hairtie.

Are you afraid of thunderstorms? Not at all.

Do you need a boyfriend/girlfriend to be happy? No, but I am happier with my boyfriend lol.

How much effort did you put into your last relationship? Last one, not that much. Current one, a lot.

Do you have impulse control? Sometimes I don't lol, I think when I'm out I wanna get fast food and I can't resist.

Would you do anything on a dare? Not anything.

#survey #surveys #personal survey #random survey

[jess-oh]

what do i title this

Hello, journal!

I dont think I've actually ever reread an entry until today. A part of me was always so afraid of the shame I'd feel of who I used to be. I haven't written here in a while since I realize I kept trying to think my way out of everything which caused a severe disconnect between my heart and my mind but my therapist, Sophia Ou, encouraged me to journal again to process my thoughts but to instead focus on how I feel instead so I'm here to give it a go!

Current update on where I'm at in life. I still live in Chicago on Buena Ave in Buena Park. I started going to Planet Fitness a couple months ago and am still trying to figure out a good schedule between traditional workouts and climbing. I have a new schedule for this week and I feel pretty good about it. It consists of waking up at 6:30am Monday through Thursday where I workout before work Monday through Wednesday, climb after work Wednesday, climb before on Thursday, and after service on Sunday. I'm slowly becoming entirely too busy again. I do really enjoy serving youth group but Cara has been pushing for us, me and Khalid, to be more involved and dedicate more time to the ministry/greater church recently. I already am so busy and have been enjoying having no social plans scheduled during the week. I do my best to give her space to speak and share her ideas but sometimes it's hard to interject and communicate my thoughts and concerns. There's also some semblance of guilt that quietly goes along with it. Who am I to disagree with her stance as it relates to matters of the church when I, myself, am not all right, with God? I just really need to carve out time in my schedule to dedicate to him again. I remember around this time, last year, I was super dedicated to doing daily QTs as I was losing my mind over the potential opportunity of moving to a new city for a Google Fellowship. I have built so much of my life in Chicago and giving that all up for 6 months shook me to my very core. I don't think I was mentally prepared to take that risk then but so much has changed now. I'm not that close with Sophie and Thor anymore, I've been at a new church post Lakeview for a while now, and have generally grown as a person. I hangout with Earl and Gongjoo a lot more now, which has been great, especially getting to play with Ellia! Her first birthday was only a couple months ago! I love her so much!

If the opportunity for a new job arose today, I would still feel hesitant to take it but I feel a lot more prepared now. Thank you for knowing what I needed at that time, God.

Currently, I'm a graphic designer at Freeosk. I've technically been here for 3 years since my hire date but my full time Freeoskiversary is on June 1st. I recently started looking into UX Design and while there is still much research to do before fully making the career jump, I actually feel pretty good about pursuing this path. Even the thought of being able to research and gather data made me feel excited for some internal work on a Freeosk project recently. I need to work on my fear of public speaking and be more comfortable with presenting but I think this feels like a good idea.

God, I pray for guidance as I attempt to navigate my next steps from here. I'm not sure what you have planned for my life and I know I so often rely only on my shoulders but I definitely want to make sure I'm right by you first before actually making any life changing decisions moving forward. I don't yet know what the future holds but I am excited to found out. For once, I am excited for life and what it can bring. I am no longer so afraid of the pain but I am bright-eyed for a brighter future. Please let this future come.

I had a series of unfortunate events happen recently(e.g. scraped car door pretty bad and had to pay 2k for repairs, 2 credit cards and $100 cash stolen from wallet, my dad got laid off and still hasnt found a job in 2 months, my relationship with my sister got tense because of my disproval of her boyfriend, i realized i outgrew my friendship with sophie, and i havent been right with God lately). I've been doing my best to just keep my head held up high and push through but it has admittedly been hard and discouraging. Not yet depressing discouraging but definitely a challenge, nonetheless.

Thank you for all that you have done and will do for my life, God.

I pray this all in your name,

Amen.

#long time no see

[coreytravelogue]

Strait of Georgia, BC, Canada - November 11, 2023

Today I am off to Victoria one more time this year, I should already be there but a storm hit which kept me from going but so far so good.

This may very well be the last time I go to Victoria, probably not but I got to start being prepared for that likelihood if I am able to find a way to Newfoundland as doubtful as it is starting to seem for me unless I quit my job.

Today is my last day of being 38 years old. My goodness what a fucking fight I have had this year of my life. Fighting airlines, fighting COVID-19, fighting my employer, fighting depression, inflation, alcoholism, burn out and all sorts of shit fuckery.

My week off was to try and have a mental break from it all before I burned out and while it did help I still feel angry and tired about things.

Victoria is and remains a place where I can just escape even for a short while and feel at home. It is too bad I can’t bring it with me. I can only hope that I can find that in Newfoundland.

I guess this entry is more about reflecting on year 38. I feel like it was another wasted year but to be honest like last year I don’t know how I could have done more without going broke.

Newfoundland in December followed by Calgary in February and Toronto in April. Calgary wound up being more fun than I expected, I would definitely go back there again if I could. The beer was great, hospitality was great too. Wish I could have seen a Flames game but oh well.

Toronto had levels of stress but of the 3-4 times I have been to Toronto I think this last time was my favourite time. Got to Jayne hat a lot of statues, pretty sure there are even more I missed. Got to see my very first Leafs game and basketball game.

After that I guess is when it got boring. Flights have been just too fucking expensive, I was planning on traveling somewhere in out of Canada in October but with all the shit fuckery with Flair Air and every other air line this year I just settled with Edmonton only to try and clear out my credit with this Flair Air fuckers.

It was still great to see my friend and my cousin even if it was only for a day and evening.

I wanted to go to Victoria this birthday because for the longest time, I have only spent my birthday in Vancouver, prior to COVID and even when it was starting to calm I always planned on going somewhere but something always kept me being money usually. Victoria is the cheapest trip I could have and it is one I know I will enjoy.

I know I will be covering this stuff again a month from now when or if I go to Newfoundland. I am starting to have my doubts. I can’t help but think about next year especially as it will be the last year of my 30s. I will leave the reflection of the last of my 30s for another time and probably my more personal diary but I can’t help but feel I need to make it count the same way I did in 2014 when I went to Europe and started this blog to document it.

I can’t afford to quit my job and go on another 2.5 month trek like 10 years ago but I do want to go somewhere big and be there for a long time. I am hoping that I will be in Newfoundland before I do it so I can commit all of my stocked up leave time to go to Japan. If I am still in Vancouver I will have to split it all again.

I mean if I was fired then well fuck it I will just go to a Japan for 2.5 months or however long I want, move to Newfoundland and figure something out after.

There is a lot of uncertainty right now, I hate uncertainty but I think I am going to have to live with uncertainty with the rest of my life. It is just going to change.

Just pisses me off because I would like to start setting plans far in advance because that is the kind of person I am, while I can be and am to a degree impulsive I do also like to think ahead. Life think looking ahead but leaving room for implusion is as much of a balance as I can have with life.

I just got to try and push harder with going to Newfoundland than before but it is only getting harder. However that will be for another time, this weekend it is French Toast and eggs Benny at a John’s Place, beer and food at The Drake, fun with friends if they are around, turn 39 and just have my last mental break before I have the next couple of weeks of surviving work till or if I can go to a Newfoundland. Then 2024 begins and hope it is less of stupid fight as year 38 and 2023 was. One can only strive to make it so.

Shazbot nanu nanu

#Spotify

[lilowl]

Love how I use tumblr so sporadically and then just come and dump a whole journal entry.

I stop and take a moment. Everything I was wishing and praying for a year ago- I hustled (hard) and finally Im starting to get it. The peace, stability, financial independence and self confidence. I was weeping this time last year, in such a low place- thinking I'd never to experience feeling "solid" and "safe" on my own.

And I keep showing up for myself and put in the hours to do it. Even when I don't feel like it, I make myself. I go to therapy 3 times a week (2 of those times are groups- which I've gotten a lot out of) and have really stepped up at work. My side hustle is picking up interested to the point where I can be choosy about which clients I want to take on/which ones I want to refer out. I've really been enjoying my job and it's been such a huge blessing 🐾🤍

Sure there are still hurdles. Turns out when you start to feel safe, a lot of your deepest and darkest demons you push down during survival mode get a chance to come to the surface. That started occurring a couple months ago as I was reaching my sober birthday. Now I need to address how much sexual harassment/ assault I experienced, with the realization that most of it was tied to drug abuse. I repressed so much shit that's coming to the light. I know I'll feel better once I start to let some of this pain out and go, but I find the process excruciatingly painful along the way. It gives me the ick and a big part of all of this has been how much I've shamed/judged myself for situations I had no control over. I have this programmed narrative that comes from the things I heard around me growing up- and I'm realizing those aren't truly my opinions. They don't align with my values at all. And I have to let these old judgements go.

Tex and Bagels are snoozing softly in either side of me as I type. I miss Pizza and I was happy to have been able to follow thru in my promise to Mamie that he always had a home with me if need be. None of my family thought he'd live very long when I took him, because he starved himself for a week refusing to leave Mamie's side on her deathbed. I'm glad I was able to keep him comfortable for his last years. His bonding with Bagels was really sweet. And he always seemed to know when I was missing my Gma and he'd come find me to cuddle 💕

Tex must be dreaming because his paws started to twitch and he just lightly growled in his sleep 😋

#thoughts

[andiska]

KTY_309 4EVA, GG4EVA

This tumblr post entry is 3 years 1 month after my last one, and this is about an event I attended 3 months ago. An event that made me go way back to the first time I liked this girl-group, and especially this one small cute little person. She's 2 years older than me, but I do want to put her in my pocket.

It all started around May-June 2023 when I saw information on Twittter (yes, I'm never going to call it 'X' though) that my bb is going on tour, which my half-ass country got listed in. There was rumor on dates and venue capacity, when it was officially announced turns out different date and venue capacity from the rumor. I was very worried if I didn't get ticket for Jakarta Taengcon, I even determined to save money to go to Bangkok to catch the tour.

And on June 30th, my sister helped me to war on the tickets. And I got the ticket! I got a lot of consideration but because I reaaaaally want to go, so I went. And it was the best decision I've ever made, and to think I will very regret it if I didn't go. The concert was very very very good. We can see that, even after few months I'm still thinking and talking about the concert and even cried myself out everytime I see KTY on social media.

Their last activity as a group was on August 2022 which they released a full album on their 15th anniversary, for the sake of the fans. It was truly my only ups in 2022, so I enjoyed it very much. Other than being fatherless, which I didn't enjoyed it that much.

And before 2022, it was 2017. Their last year being active, and which 3 from 8 was out from SM, between 2017 to 2022 it was just normal fangirling mood because fans were kind of both pessimist and optimist to see another group activity. That is until I went to Taengcon...

Yup, that's me. 10 years apart. Wearing my own designed t-shirt for the concert 😅

I mean, look at her 😳🥵

The concert was very emotional for both KTY and all fans, from the first time she come up on stage we can really see and feel how she's very nervous. And went along the way until the end we can see her very playful, flirty 😳, and happy to interacts with the fans. And we had our fan events which one of them is a banner said

"태연 마음 = 소원 마음"

meaning Taeyeon's Heart = Sone's Heart.

Which KTY herself agreed on it 👍🏼

And now all my feelings from before adult life has come to the surface once again, and we're both #YATEAM so here we are.

I was so happy to see her happy at the concert, doing the best thing that she love very much. And with the deadly wavy black hair, just O M G it feels like my birthday that day.

I'm going to meet her again soon, I know I will, I know I am.

[martinezmicah]

20221201 | Year-End Beginnings

Content warning: This post contains topics involving mental health and sexual assault.

It’s never too late to start anew this year. I guess?

It's kind of weird that this seemed like a short year yet a lot of things happened. It was a year of fruitfulness, kind of.

I got my first job as an online data entry contributor and researcher. It was a remote job, and I am good at it. However, i felt like I wanted to try having a job in government research or the food industry. Of course I applied for jobs. I had multiple interviews. I never really got rejection letters but having no updates on the application just meant they didn't push through with me.

I really wish they still sent out letters to all who applied, and for people like me who has been through multiple screenings, I wish they had an honest feedback about my application and credentials.

I did become a Project Assistant for a technology business incubator at a state university in March. These kinds of jobs are on a contract basis and we were not exactly employees of the university. I had the job for around 3 months. I didn't renew my contract. I felt my mental health declining before I decided to hand in my resignation. I don't think it was really a resignation since my contract was up anyway.

I went back home and kept my data entry job. I was being paid a bit higher here anyways and when I'm at home, I wouldn't have to worry about rent, food, and transportation.

My work schedule is also a flexible, so I can do some extra work when I still have extra time during the week.

At the end of July, I joined the 13th National Youth Parliament. I was one of the delegates from our city, as being the Secretary General of the first youth parliament. I made new friends whom I still keep in touch with until now.

In August, just a few days after the NYP, I also participated in the ASEAN Youth Forum's SEAYouth Festival 2022. It was a fun learning experience and it was just amazing hearing from different youth leaders across ASEAN. I was also surprised when I was awarded Best Delegate from the Philippines for my participation, granted I wasn't able to join through speaking since I was also volunteering then, but I did type in my suggestions and proposals in chat and through email. It was a really awesome experience and it's just inspiring how these different voices from different nations are coming together for the betterment of the ASEAN Youth.

I have been working productively on my job, but I was still having doubts about my abilities. I also felt like I am not doing enough when my peers are going on 5-year work anniversaries or going abroad for graduate studies and such.

I have been volunteering at church more. I found a sense of belongingness there. They know what I have been through, my depression and anxiety, how I had to go to counseling and drink my meds. Some of them know how I was sexually assaulted by someone I used to trust when I was in college.

And yet, despite these, I didn't hear any judgment from them. They helped me recover. They made me feel welcome and warm and fuzzy. They celebrate with me even in small wins. They cry with me when appropriate.

I have been active in the music ministry again. I even shared my story to the youth leaders in a university last November. Oh, right! I also turned 26 last November.

Among other things, I wished for a lifetime partner on my birthday. I have had feelings for this person and I am still actively praying for him. But I need to guard my heart, more so now that I hear he's also ready to pursue someone. It's just, I know I should have said something then, but I didn't wanna sound needy or too upfront.

I am still gonna pray for a beautiful love story. One that I won't be afraid to show the world. One that I can write over and over and still not get tired after a million years.

But I do hope it's you. I pray to God that it would be you.

It's the last month of the year. A while ago, I went to the Worship Night at church. I led the worship. I led a prayer for the campus ministry. Oh, right, I am going to lead the group for our scholars at Real Life and I am excited to be meeting them this weekend again for our first official mentoring session. I was thinking of sharing my college testimony as well.

Anyway, tonight we just decided to go have dinner at McDonald's rather than go home earlier. After the meal, we played a bunch of mobile table top games, ending it with the classic Chain Reaction game. I didn't win, but it was fun. We shared a tricycle home, and it took us around 30 minutes to actually go home since we lived in different parts of the city but we had to ask the driver to start with the person who lived the farthest from the city proper.

It was a lot of fun, even though it took some time away from what was supposed to be my work time. But it's fine. I still have the rest of the weekend to do the work.

It's getting late. I'm sure by this time, you're probably sleeping peacefully. You have an early morning tomorrow.

I hope I see you on the weekends.

#personal #daily #2022

[medusas--cascade]

tim and i found again last night. i know the last entry i had was our last big fight. but this one is a bit different. just haven’t had the time to write down my thoughts here because i swithced jobs, had to adjust to that. i also started to go out more, mostly because sally visited and i spent i think about 3 different days with her. she was staying in makati which is fairly near me so it was a bit easy for me to keep visiting her. renz also came back for a while and he spent an afternoon together. 

things were ok for a while with tim. i went to his birthday party and we were really happy. we got to see each other, spend time with each other, and he go to introduce me to other people important in his life like other family friends and his HS friends. 

then afterwards, we were talking about having a threesome. and he brought up what if it were with julia, which of course was so offputting for me. they’re incredibly close and i always noticed their relationship bordered on the inappropriate. i thought maybe they really are just close friends. but it still hurt me to know he’d consider that with his friend, who recently just broke up with his other friend, which makes things more fucked up. i had to really think if i was just being close-minded, but it really doesn’t make sense for a three way to happen wherein 2 people are incredibly close and have a close relationship yet i dont. he was stupid in that way. we’ve been fighting over this. 

but last night it got even worse. i read his messages with her and even on his birthday, he stayed up late to talk to her. maybe that’s a little bit on me because i pretended to be asleep because i didn’t know what to do for his birthday. but seeing that made me realize that maybe i really wasn’t enough for him and maybe he’d wanna be with her instead. he never got to be with her because it was only this year a few months ago that she broke up with her long-term boyfriend. so i figured maybe he’d want to be with her instead. 

however, last may, i pointed out how there were so many instances wherein he knew i was sad. he knew i needed him. yet he wasn’t doing anything. i find it so unfair that he could extend to much kindness and time to be there for someone like her but not for me. he told me it’s because he was running away from our problems. this was really bad for me. i find it so unfair. he tells me he’ll make it up to me and i know he’s sorry. but i don’t know what to make of it.