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50shadesofmittens · 4 years

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Princess Bride AU

Last list of ideas I finally put down through conversations with the wonderful @coaxionunlimited

The Princess Bride AU

And Oh GOD this one isn’t even all the details, nor is it in any order so much as a bunch of ideas slapped together

To start I cannot imagine it any way except with Cato Sicarius as Vizzini- more versatile roles include Magnus as Buttercup, CG as Westley and Tzeentch as Humperdink

And yes Cato Sicarius as Vizzini is indeed more important than the roles of our main leads

Part of what makes this idea so much fun is that CG has to find unique creative ways to overcome all the challenges Westley faces- he can’t exactly find a poison that Sicarius’ OP-ness won’t be immune to if he’s also going to be immune

Yes, even promethium-based alcohol won’t cut it

I feel like the only way to beat Sicarius is to do something similar to what Westley did by letting Sicarius’ enthusiasm get him killed

Somehow leading him into a trap

My best guess so far is CG brings up that he once defeated a literal god in contest of Vostroyan-whatever and uses misspoken words to trick Sicarius into thinking the goal of the game is to get to Ultramar- Sicarius would them go to ultramar ASAP before the card game even starts

And Sicarius somehow warps himself there and is this unaware that the challenge hasn’t started, a full galaxy away from where CG and Magnus (in the Box still of course) were left behind

(Alternatively, the deception can be unintentional, as CG genuinely thought that the best way to respond to Sicarius’ long list of achievements was to list a few of his own achievements, which prompted Sicarius to demand to know HOW CG bested a god so he could prove himself by doing the same, and then Sicarius jumped to his own conclusions and portaled to Ultramar while CG was still trying to explain Vostroyan-whatever)

Then Sicarius would probably go brag about winning the contest, which would lead to Calgar learning and being pissed off that Sicarius forgot to bring the Primarch along

By which time CG and Magnus are well into the forest of death if not captured/recaptured by Tzeentch

Despite these roles I imagine Tzeentch as the one screeching Inconcievable! When CG turns out to be alive (again) after torture-death

Instead of a wheelbarrow being what gets them into the castle/into Tzeentch’s realm’s inner sanctum, it’s a camel

This is in a reference to the scene when Westley is just revived when he’s coming up with a plan to get into the castle. First he says it’s impossible, then when he finds out they have access to a wheelbarrow he has a plan (the wheelbarrow being the critical piece), ie this scene: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XeO3jMZphhs

Once Magnus realizes it was CG who he just pushed down a ravine/banished to another dimension/etc he just says “oh shit” before jumping in after

In reference to the ravine/recognition scene https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rzO-sv0mtZ4

My version of the rescue would have less CG lying and more him having found a really really really good psyker scrambler/blocker and being shocked that it works well enough to confuse Magnus, not realizing that Magnus doesn't know who he is until after some hilarious miscommunication

Honestly? I keep seeing Vulcan as Fezzik and Corvus as Inigo

Just based on their personalities

The bit where Inigo gets all drunk and depressed and shouting for his ex-employer to come find him and beating the guards sent to harass him senseless like I can 100% imagine Corvus doing just that

Also Fezzik’s General love of rhymes, and his all around gentle kindness while still not being Soft but also being huge is very Vulcan

And when Fezzik is tending to Inigo by dumbing him in water, imagine Vulcan bringing out a few buckets of lava and Corvus flings himself away screaming “I’m up! I’m up!”

Yes this means Sicarius acted like he was the boss when traveling with two Primarchs because you KNOW he would

Which makes Fucking Horus the six fingered man (who killed Corvus’ father)

And Vulcan's father, but Corvus is the one who’s laser-focused on revenge and has the whole speech planned out

Also in the style of the book (the Princess Bride was a book before it was a movie), I want to go through all the people who were the most beautiful human in the galaxy before Magnus and what happened to them to make them lose their status

In order: the Emperor (died), Sanguinius (died too), Fulgrim (too much drugs & partying with Slaanesh), ANGRON (got daemonified), and a handful of random humans whose lifespans were mortal and thus have died over the centuries naturally

Also I don’t want to spoil the Princess Bride for anyone, but the method Westley uses to defeat Humperdink is very similar to the one I see CG using to finally get Tzeentch off his and Magnus’ backs

Also for Miracle Max I cant help but envision Cegoratch as Max and Ephrael Stern as Max’s wife

That pairing changes the entire tone of all their scenes, but it’s hilarious in its own way so I want to do it

For reference on miracle max and his wife: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d4ftmOI5NnI

Stern is completely deadpan in her delivery. “I smelled deception, so I came out to see if some of the wretches of the fallen sorcerous legion required more destruction to their dust-coated wretches and annoying hats in order to flee. But I see it’s just my husband, making an ass of himself again. Though not unexpected, such a sight is still disappointing.”

*Nervous laughter* “Ah, all guests are reminded that it is none of their business what-”

“One cannot be a guest when one has wed the owner of the property.”

And later when Corvus asks how Stern can be a warrior of the Emperor when she’s married to a Xeno, she first gives a long speech on what she’s learned about various Xenos races and a full explanation of her reasoning behind thinking that miscegenation is in fact furthering the emperor’s will. When Corvus asks for clarity on her marrying a Xeno God she replies:

“HERETIC! I have done no such thing.”

“But you just said that you two were-”

“The only being I will ever acknowledge as a God is the one and only Emperor of Mankind. As recent reports from the Emperor himself dictate, he is a Manemperor, not a god. Therefore, I am an atheist.”

“But... then... what else do you call your husband? What is he, if not a god?”

“A librarian.”

“He’s bringing back the dead!”

“A librarian with a diverse skill-set. Albeit, one that unfortunately excludes the conception of decent punchlines.”

*Note that Stern started attacking Corvus for that accusation after the first ‘HERETIC’ so there’s also fighting hijinks throughout this dialogue*

Now I have a new crack pairing and it’s Ephrael/Cegoratch

Oh and Magnus does find some Primarch-level poison made from Perturabo’s geneseed, which he’s fiddling with when CG makes his dramatic entrance (in reference to the scene where Buttercup is about to stab herself on her wedding night before Westley interrupts)

Granted Magnus’ motives are less loss of true love and more despair after Tzeentch has destroyed any chance of him getting free, and recognizing that any hope he has of getting free is just giving Tzeentch more ways to control him

I feel that the gatekeeper who Fezzik, Inigo and Westley intimidate while storming the castle could be Karstodes. IDK why he’s on team Chaos now, I just love his style of badly trying to lie

Whatever the equivalent of the Rodent of Unusual Size is, Magnus is the one who kills it

#fic ideas #princess bride au #Mittens #crack pairings #help I have a new crack pairing what do #tts

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burtlederp · 4 years

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⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐!!!! for ask game

Okay I'll be honest!!! I do not understand what a 'director's cut' is!! But I will give you a buncha fun facts about my characters because they haven't come up yet!!

Valerie is colorblind, monochromatic

Risa thinks at speeds inconcievable by a human mind. Knowing the inherent bias humans and other creatures have towards things that don't seem alive, she has a special body language software. So instead of answering things immediately as soon as she has an answer, she might pause and pretend to think about it for a moment, or might correct something she said in order to emphasize a point, or even actual body language things like folding her arms, tapping a foot, angling her antennae in a certain way. It's all for show babyyyy

One of those iffy, kinda-abusive rules Risa had with Elias was "If you're going to do anything, you're going to do it well." At some point it got to the point where he stopped doing things he usually liked to do or just did out of habit, because she meant this rule. She caught him singing along to a song once, and BAM he had to practice singing daily. Started doodling once while he was doing an assignment for her? Art lessons. Dancing to a song? Guess what, boy, you're gonna learn how to ACTUALLY DANCE. He gained a lot of new skills that way, but it wasn't always very enjoyable. Kinda killed a lot of things for him.

Risa's android body's power source is a god of intelligence she trapped in a jar with a very powerful glyph. All of her power sources are captured gods.

The scar over Jackson's nose is not only from the multiple times it's been broken, it's from the multiple surgeries he's had to fix it.

Samson has a degree in English and Etymology and has published two books. He really dislikes the first one he published, which was a discourse on Atlas Shrugged and he really wishes it would disappear, and the second was a book on the languages and cultures of realms that he's visited. He is significantly happier with the second book and wishes it had done better in the market.

Anton, by normal human's standards, is a reckonable opponent. Anton by his old tribes' standards is not. Compared to others in his native lands, he is a bit weaker and quite a bit thinner than most, which led to him being at the bottom of the pecking order.

There! Buncha fun facts :3 sorry if there's some particular stuff you wanted to know or something, just respond to this post and I'll give you some info!! :>

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shalehairballs · 7 years

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Oct 4: Underwater

I took the night off yesterday, so I’ll be posting two today. This one is of Daekie’s Sailor Juliet / Lily-Rose Epilor. I chose her because she’s this disaffected youth that neither actualizes herself nor puts great stock in how her departure might affect others. And for that, I find her fascinating to explore on a psychological level -- how does this pattern of thought affect her? How would she react in a life-or-death situation?

So I chose to portray her in mirrorwalking, which is described as heavy on underwater connotations. Underwater as a prompt feels highly sensory / heavy on imagery to me, so I wanted to explore this theme without thought-verbs, and use a character that would not have a focal emotional response to potentially drowning.

Underwater

The mirror spread around her, cool and thick, vast beyond the edges of her fingertips. She felt the currents envelop her, guide her on a path unseen to even herself. Her hair lilted and bounced around her face in the semi-gravity. The tug was strong; forward it took her, against all other option. The endless mirror world broadened, gave sight of itself through the ambient and implacable light. Here, she floated within a space inconcievably broad.

Juliet accepted it. She tasted no oxygen on the air, nor did she fight for its presence. This world drew her into a space so foreign, so indomitable, so pristine that she saw no reason to resist. She may disappear here — the current captured her already — but that thought mattered little. The waves spread her thin and pressed her ever further. Swimming back demanded far more power than her bone-thin arms could produce. She simply touched the mirror once, and by that action alone, submitted her life to it.

She read about drowning once before. She read how the victims thrash and fight irresistibly, how trickles of water irritate the lungs, how they spasm into coughing and inhaling and ultimately cause their own deaths. Maybe that was her fate, floating further into the mirror. Maybe somewhere, deep in these invisible oceans, she would find its countless victims. Other little girls naïve enough to touch the mirror. Other children too thin and wan to struggle against the current. She held her breath fiercely now, but no end drew near her. The current pushed her further into the smoky, limitless white. Her lungs writhed with struggle, burned with the need for air. Carbon dioxide clouded her lungs.

Whether she died or not mattered little, she told herself. Her acquaintances would carry on. The Court would press on. Her departure would be that of a prick, a sting, a gentle scratch on the emotions of others. They would count her as practice for a real death, a preparation for real grief. She could give them that, if only through her own life.

But Juliet long left herself now, floating in the endless never. She watched scenes of her fellow senshi simply accepting her loss, perhaps discovering it even, alongside the countless others. She was only a basic senshi, after all - nothing so great and powerful as an eternal lost to this great white. She saw her parents cry tears for the daughter she was meant to be, the idea of Lily-Rose Epilor left to never realize. She saw herself grow still in the not-waters. The mirror pushed her ever forward,

and she breathed.

The air tasted stagnant, yet her lungs gulped at it greedily. Her perceptions changed just slightly — heavy current now felt like gusting air, and the weightlessness of her skirts, her hair, her limbs each came from the lack of gravity absent water. 'Underwater' was a lie manufactured by her own mind as a betrayer. Did she want herself to die, then? Would it matter if she did?

A stark frame realized itself out of the haze. Still foggy, it offered a slightly brighter stretch of white in its reflection. The rays pierced out into the smoke-stricken realm of between, cutting through wefts of hair and the sheer overlay that engulfed her. She found no need to reach for it - the current still pushed her ever forward - and she surrendered herself to its whem when she was once again pushed through the plane.

She emerged on the other side, whole and untouched by water. She examined her smooth palms. Touched her fine skirts. Around her, great oak trees rose up around a plain, wall-length mirror. Underbrush grew high, wild and untamed. Around her, the sounds of nature stirred and trembled in the twilight. Nothing changed but her surroundings.

Lily-Rose Epilor - Sailor Juliet - still existed in life. She felt neither here nor there about it.

#inktober #inktober2017 #writing #moonshop

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