#still fucking tells me the bullshit tho and I’m TIRED. bro I’m DONE.

[extreme-technicality]

.

#dni im just venting #can spring hurry its ass up???? I’m TIRED of being tired and hollow all day every day #winter reminds me Constantly of how I can’t visualize a future for myself and how I’m Big Mad at my parents for fucking up me n my brothers #and how I’m terrified my friends like each other more than they like me EVEN FUCKING THO I’ll have like hours-long convos with them #like all of what my shit brain chemistry is telling me is demonstrably false but like???????? #still fucking tells me the bullshit tho and I’m TIRED. bro I’m DONE. #I’m OVER IT. #but am I capable of not doing that on my own??? lmao absolutely tf not who do u take me for #anyway boutta get myself food and gonna rewatch treasure planet again #I’m so sorry I just reread this and realized I shifted between two different things with absolutely ZERO warning so allow me to elaborate: #the shit my brain tells me about my friends and the idea that I don’t have a future are both demonstrably false #the anger at my parents? valid and justified. not to air out our dirty laundry or anything bUT my parents were Not Prepared for children and #in point of fact they see kids as things to be controlled and not People #and I’m Big Mad about that #As I Should Be #thinking my friends don’t like me/will abandon me and thinking that I don’t have a future to plan for? #Incorrect. False. Brain Why Are You Like This. We’ve Talked About This.

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

hi I'm back again. Anyways; as always you don't have to answer if you don't wish! How do you think the residents would react to a young Pureblood MC? (I'm talking about young like a minor.) With that Gen Z in a nutshell personality. Obviously no romantic feelings, just in your opinion how do you think they'd react? all of my questions are just "coincidentally" oddly specific aren't they, totally

Oh shit whaddup I love the idea of Gen Z MC!!! Young pureblood it is, here we go! I’m going to be moving from the assumption that they’re like Comte/Leo; very sympathetic to humanity and sometimes have existential crises (trauma babeyyyyyyyyy). As such, I’ll also be assuming she’s not super close to her family given she rejects the larger vampiric hierarchy/superiority paradigm, memes and modernity, all that jazz

I hope this fits the bill! c:

Under a cut bc is a lonnnnnnng boi~ Click after Napo to see everyone else’s! No explicit triggers that I’m aware of, but if anybody sees anything I missed feel free to let me know

Comte’s reaction:

Absolute baby, he has decided this is his grandchild--no he will not change his mind or take constructive criticism. Get’s ESPECIALLY concerned when he starts to see signs of that “nothing in life matters 😎” nihilism, but doesn’t pester them about it or becomes naggy. Growing up he had similar issues with the prospect of eternal life surrounded by creatures with a mortal lifespan, so he doesn’t judge. He’s more like nah we all hit that vibe, let’s see if we can get their mind off it c: I feel like Gen Z really understand and appreciate the importance of culture and art, so I feel like they would bond a ton over trips to museums/plays/concerts! Invites them to tea time if he ever sees them particularly silent (ah yes, repression) or particularly tired, and does his best to ensure their safety without being intrusive (has briefed the men to escort/accompany her as needed, though Sebas usually does it).

If he sees fangs out around baby he will thrash the shit out of the perpetrator--unless it’s an accident. No excuses. That’s a child. Doesn’t give a FUCK if they’re another pureblood even with all the arranged marriage bullshit. He said what he said. (Remember that biting between vampires or vampire + human relations is considered something that’s only done between intimate partners, so he is having none of that for a minor)

Leonardo’s reaction:

Also certified granddad, but he’s the one that enables shenanigans and is just like “oh worm” when it comes to the existential dread (it’s a Tuesday). At first though Leo is basically that meme like: (Stupidman = Leo, Maddie = MC)

Not all purebloods are necessarily dangerous, but most are either incredibly indifferent to the plight of others (especially humans) or actively range from like playing social mind games to being sociopathic murderers/etc. the list goes on. As such, Leonardo is suspicious to no end until he sees that the kid really doesn’t have any ill will in her. She jokes with Sebas (they quote vines on the daily) and works with him normally; even when Leo asks Sebas he’s just “????? bro she’s just my kouhai, thanks for worrying tho”. One day he’s tasked with escorting her to grab groceries and assorted things for the mansion, and she freezes in place before bolting across the street. Turns out she saw a kid trip in the road and fall, and a carriage was moving fast from the other side--it likely wasn’t going to be able to stop. She scoops up the kid and holds them close, and when the parents try to thank her profusely she just seems more uncomfortable with the praise than triumphant. She didn’t want the kid to get hurt. If she could do something about it, it was as simple as that.

From that point on they’re hella chill and hang out together, usually just bonding in silence. If they’re an artist, he’ll offer them pointers and technique manuals--will help however he can. If not, they’ll just be reading together in the library now and again. If she falls asleep, he’ll tuck her in and watch over her (cue red eye meme when the door opens, but then it’s just Vincent so he c:). He’ll often pay close attention to her eating habits to make sure nothing’s amiss with her health since she’s still a growing pureblood. If she struggles with what she is a lot (given she’s sympathetic to human beings) he’ll synchronize his Rouge drinking with hers to make sure she doesn’t starve herself ;-;. Even if she’s just forgetful about drinking/eating, he’ll do what he can to make her life easier (that’s how he shows his affection uwu)

He will, of course, also tease her about being a baby until she kicks him in the shin while Comte sighs and tells him to knock it off with a smack upside the head

Napoleon’s reaction:

Not granddad energy, but you better believe he’s in a weird territory between sheer admiration and “I am your older brother now, eat your vegetables” “But I don’t even need vegetables” “Eat your vegetables and I’ll take you to a crepe shop” “............deal” 

Basically it’s unlikely MC is super close to her siblings or even has any (pureblood children are a rare feat) so she’s like......wary, but then she just ???? this is.....kinda nice? Just having somebody that cares in a chill way, but still fully encourages her to throw men across the street if they’re hurting women/children (high fives her every time). He’ll often invite her to the swordplay lessons with the kids alongside Isaac’s teaching; she’s free to join in the learning, or honestly just hang out with people closer to her age (he’s v concerned about her having friends that she can relate to and talk to freely). 

Protective in a subtle way, like Leonardo. Escorts her places and helps her carry groceries without fail when Sebas is running other errands. She becomes his crepe shop cover buddy whenever he has an intense hankering for sweets: “wanna go to that crepe shop around the corner” “you’re just too chicken to go alone, fool” “do you want crepes or not nunuche” “............BOKBOKBOK” “aight that’s it **gives her a noogie**” (they go anyway and have a marvelous time rating the crepes from best to worst, they got a whole list goin’) 

Glares Arthur down if he so much as LOOKS in her direction

Mozart’s reaction:

Mozart is just the “what is with this sassy, lost child?” meme. Doesn’t dislike them, but they are just not remotely threatened by his haughty disdain by any extension. And he HATES IT. The MC is always just “Okay, boomer” and he just ?????? He doesn’t know what it means but it’s openly dismissive, so he mad.

Like idk if y’all know this meme, but it’s the same energy as:

It’s only when he notices she’s always punctual and careful with his requests that he starts to warm up. For example, she makes him a mocha by combining the way he likes his coffee and hot cocoa to perfection when he falls asleep at his piano. (She feels bad for him after Comte explains because--though he’s got a stick up his butt--he’s clearly distressed in his new surroundings ;-; Plus, the kind of perfectionism Mozart exudes is an extension of internalized shame, and when she begins to see that she really shifts her approach.) As such, he begins to soften to her presence. He begins to see that she isn’t indifferent to his existence, it’s more that she sees no need for intimidation and believes admiration is earned (basic respect isn’t a privilege, it’s a right). When he figures that out, he stops being so barbed and terse--starts to relax. Offers to let her stay and listen to his pieces if she wants, and she’s honestly touched given his clear struggle with vulnerability. Cuddles with Schelm at the window as he plays, and they become good friends. 

As a result, Mozart becomes fiercely protective despite her sturdier nature as a pureblood and has hissed venom at Arthur about the fact that she is off fucking limits. Doesn’t leave her alone in the same room as the other men unless it’s with Jeanne or Comte; he don’t trust like that.

Arthur’s reaction:

Sweating a lot at the sudden collection of baleful eyes sticking to his back everywhere he goes, but figures he brought it on himself to an extent. That being said, he can’t really get a word in edgewise given she just walks away when he tries to engage in conversation or compliment her.

Tough nut to crack this one, but he doesn’t let it discourage him. The only way she’ll give him the time of day is to play chess--and she kicks his ass soundly every single time. He’s fascinated by her extensive analytic ability, but she keeps silent about her strategies and thinking. Dazai and Theo always love to watch him get his ass handed to him, but he considers it a really interesting experience; it gives him insight into her mind, no matter how much she tries to hide. Patient, efficient, brutal--this kid has seen some shit, probably.

It’s after that point he just concedes she probably won’t let him in, though it doesn’t diminish his curiosity about the future; and perhaps traces of dread. What does the future look like for both her and Sebastian to be that stoic and aloof? It worries him...

Vincent’s reaction:

Vincent is v v impressed by her sense of self, and honestly sees a lot of Theo in her. She’s a little more reticent than Theo, but she has this same commitment to protecting the vulnerable and penetrating through the lies/shitty convictions of others. She is not a person who bends easily, but even so there’s a quiet kind of gentleness to her: she always chats to him v calmly, asks if he needs anything and is doing okay, doesn’t get impatient when he drops things or forgets his apron for the laundry. I think he would respond very positively to her presence, even if it wasn’t intentional. He just brightens up like a little sun and asks her out to picnics for fun; he has no greater intention than enjoying her smile and silly antics (he doesn’t always understand the references, but the way she executes it with so much dry wit--like Theo--makes him laugh). He just feels the warmth of family/familiarity around her ;~;

Ironically, they’re both exceedingly concerned for the other because they’re too self-sacrificing jkashlgdks like this is 100% a case of “I can’t let a young lady risk getting hurt” “Vincent I’m literally indestructible please just let me do this” “But it still hurts” “But I don’t want you to scar--” (This conversation extends so long that the author felt it would be more beneficial to add an etc. here). 

He admires her and trusts in her abilities more due to the nature of her maturity, treats her like a cherished friend and sometimes younger sibling (not condescending but very indulgent; gives her the last of his sweets for example, or pats her on the head when she’s feeling gloomy--more of a wholesome puts her first). But make no mistake, he will throw hands in milliseconds if she gets ganged up on or can’t handle a threat--he just lets her handle most things bc she’s capable~

Isaac’s reaction:

Torn. Because on the one hand, she’s very serious and conscientious about her work--doesn’t want to inconvenience or trouble anyone--and he relates to that heavy.

HOWEVER.

She’s also got insanely chaotic energy when the mood strikes, so when Dazai starts doing his random shitfuckery you better believe MC is upping the ante. (I’m talking AH. ENSLAVED MOISTURE. levels). So Isaac essentially oscillates between thankful for her fortitude to bashing his head against a table for every second he knows her.

In all seriousness though, I would see Isaac as being pretty concerned. Like Vincent, they’re both self-sacrificing to a fault--and he doesn’t want that for her, especially given how young she is. Often tells her not to overdo it or to ask for help if she looks overwhelmed, though it’s not condemning; he says it softly with a neutral look on his face. (He considers it a Certified Mood^TM). He just wants to give back all the care she puts into helping around the house. He doesn’t feel right watching a kid work so hard without reminding her that she should find time to have fun and live for herself too. There will be plenty of time when she’s older to get serious.

He has a fairly easy time interacting with her because of his experience with kids; he takes her seriously (when she’s not clowning) and treats her autonomy with respect. If anything, she’s probably the protective one. She knows he’s an aberrant so she pays laser attention to when he’s suffering and brings him Rouge (not scared because she’s stronger than him and not human lmao, and she sees no need to put Sebastian at risk). When that uni pres pesters him, she goes cold and angry and asks the man to step off when she sees him start to downspiral. They’re essentially on equal footing (he has more life experience, she has more bodily strength/confidence). They're just chill and kind with each other (babies of the mansion, beloved by all).

Theodorus' reaction:

Because he is a manchild, he will be chill/generally indifferent until Vincent starts being indulgent with her (bro-con). He won't be violent or anything like that, but he will pout a storm and try to verbally shoo her away. Because she's a woman, intelligent, and likely a feminist--this will become hilarious because she will not remotely take him seriously. She will just ignore him or roast him in seconds before moving on with her day. Otherwise he doesn't care much because he doesn't have time to play babysitter (unless there's no one else to help).

At the most, he'll make sure she's safe and use the excuse that Vincent would be upset if he did anything less. If she likes/loves dogs and plays with King while she's there, he'll soften up and thank her for taking care of him. If she makes hella pancakes, he'll be the proudest about it--ruffling her hair. If she protects Vincent in any capacity, he'll be torn between jealous, grateful and impressed; he likes a kid that can hold their own and take responsibility within their abilities.

So their relationship is v much like a chill uncle with their niece; fond, but not necessarily super close or spend a ton of time together. He has his priorities, but he won't be an asshat (mostly).

Jeanne's reaction:

Jeanne is confused on so many levels. He doesn't dislike her spunk he's just staggered by her level of sheer reckless, righteous rage. (And he's a bit wary in the face of another pureblood as a potential enemy) but after a bit more time around her he relaxes. She's fairly simple to understand when you get to know her; cares about others to a fault, existential dread, overworks herself. Stays watchful, but he just treats her like the younger kids that Napoleon brings by the weapons shop when they need armor for practice. It can get a little funny because he’ll just be like “uhhhh uh kids like sweet stuff right? Here have some of the macaroons somebody brought by earlier, I don’t like ‘em that much anyway.” And she just “??? Thanks???” He doesn’t mind being around her, just doesn’t really know what to say so they often fall into comfortable silence after exchanging small talk. She likes that he isn’t complicated; what you see is what you get with Jeanne. It’s nice not to have to keep her guard up every second of the day,

When he sees her feeling particularly down, he’ll take her to that little field of white lilies behind the mansion during a full moon night. The silver light seems to make the petals emit an ethereal glow, and she makes him a flower crown in thanks. He listens kindly if she wants to talk, and if she doesn’t--that’s okay too; he’ll just give her a head pat.

Honestly he finds a lot of relief in the fact that she's a pureblood, because he feels less nervous about her being fragile or her getting fatally hurt when he’s not around. Will still be very gentle with her and protect her when she’s in proximity

Mission Status: Fucking Wholesome

Dazai’s reaction:

Big brother time? It’s big brother time!!!! He instantly makes it his subtle mission to look after her, though he’s v lowkey abt it. She takes one look at this depressed mofo climbing in through the window and just goes “aw yeah, this guy FUCKS” and they become besties at a glance. They basically make a game out of who can be the most absurd whenever they’re in the same room. Comte and Leo find it utterly hilarious, Napoleon is digging a grave for Isaac in the backyard (we all know his heart won’t be able to take it. Mozart is probably next. A moment of silence for our fallen.)

I just imagine them like that one post (@/acoolguy):

Dazai: You ever have to shake your leg because there’s a rock in it? MC: That’s your bones Dazai: Every day I learn some more

He’ll always share treats with her and brings her along for walks if she’s feeling wanderlust; he knows how hard it can be, how restless the heart becomes so far from home. He does his best to distract her with their ongoing jokes, but one day it starts raining very suddenly while they’re out. He rushes her under the nearest tree with broad, broad leaves and settles his haori/overcoat over her head. He looks incredibly serious as he looks to the sky--almost glowering at the dark clouds gathering, He doesn’t look at all like his usual fun-loving self in that split second, even though he’s back to his good-natured chirping “Guess we’ll just have to wait out the downpour. MC, are you cold? I should have been more careful.” She shakes her head and shares the coat with him, holding it out insistently until he relents. Their hands brush and she notices they’re freezing, but she doesn’t say anything. She seems to sense he has a lot on his mind, and leans her shoulder against his. The silence feels fragile; she doesn’t want to risk shattering it--shattering him. It is often said that it is an act of great courage to wipe away someone’s tears. But it can also be an act of great gentleness to turn away, to pretend one cannot see them fall (whether visible or not).

One day, after MC returns to her own time, Dazai returns to his room to find two shadows hanging from his window. Though a little crude--they’ve obviously been made by a beginner--it’s clear what they are. Rain ghosts. (Sebastian later explains it was MC’s wish that he have them, and Dazai only smiles very, very gently in response.)

Shakespeare’s reaction:

MC gets one look at him and knows something’s off. She can’t quite tell what it is, but he doesn’t feel like the rest of the family. She can sense something behind him, something lurking; but she can’t quite place it. (Comte has mentioned before that purebloods can sense each other, so I imagine MC knows right off the bat he isn’t a normal sired vampire--she just doesn’t know enough to identify exactly what it is.)

That being said, she is sus. He keeps talking like some kind of weird ass court jester/fae, and she hated his work when she had to do it for school (only enjoyed the Hamlet memes because, let’s be real, that shit is uproarious). When he tries to coax her to see Vlad with him, she says “'Sblood, do you think I am easier to be played on than a pipe? Call me what instrument you will, though you can fret me, yet you cannot play upon me.” And he just freezes in place before he starts laughing. Considers their battle of wills well-played, and warns her not to go out alone--doesn’t bother her again. Though sometimes enjoys listening to her conversations with others for good roast material. (No he is not taking notes, no this new chara is just fire and feral for no good reason--nothing to do with MC)

Sebastian’s reaction:

The l o r e, MC. Give him the forbidden pureblood lore. Will be incredibly curious and ask about what vampires are like outside of the mansion, for science of course. If he senses discomfort though his questions will die down completely--it’s not his intention to make her uncomfortable. He’s just curious! 

Despite his stoicism he’s actually a very, very understanding and warm person.  Will listen to any teenage jadedness or hopelessness with fond patience, recalling the days he was similar. He’ll offer what advice he can. He’s not one to be preachy, but if he sees someone at a loss, he’ll offer what he thinks might be a productive direction for them. Given her removal from her home and parents--even though she’s already well into high school--he’ll sympathize deeply with her position. Will be a firm but gentle guardian (hello Mansion Mom #2), offers her candy every time she does a chore exceptionally well or offers assistance without prompting. She’s sus and takes it reluctantly at first, but after she tries one in private secretly loves them. Sebas is just silently “you like krabby patties don’t you, squidward”. If she’s honest, she’s comforted by the sense of normalcy and care he gives, the harmless joking and easy respect for others (unless otherwise provoked).

When she finds out about his hobby considers him to be a Fucking Nerd^TM and wants to shove him into a locker, but in reality is endeared by how much he genuinely cares about the men. She thinks it’s a harmless fascination, and she senses the oddest...ephemerality about him. Because of this, she becomes pretty protective; he’s a human and he’s too nice for his own good. While she identifies in one sense, she worries in another. Pureblood are sturdy, but humans can’t necessarily sustain that kind of constant self-giving for long...

Also bc my tag game too strong adding it here: #i love the prospect of pureblood MC trying to bring Sebas and Napo together #MC: bruh i got this #Sebas, full of gay panic: wait, MC nO--

Meme tl;dr in the tags also for your enjoyment! I’m sorry this one took a little longer than most to finish!

#asks #ikevamp #ikemen vampire #ikevamp headcanons #ikevamp napoleon #ikevamp mozart #ikevamp leonardo #ikevamp leo #ikevamp arthur #ikevamp vincent #ikevamp isaac #ikevamp theo #ikevamp jeanne #ikevamp jean #ikevamp dazai #ikevamp comte #ikevamp saint germain #ikevamp shakespeare #ikevamp sebastian #gen z pureblood mc #i had a lot of fun writing this! I hope this met your expectations friend! c: #comte and leo: uwu grandparents #mozart: okay BOOMER #napo: HAHAHA shithead siblings i love it #arthur and shakes: wouldn't you like to know weather boy. 'where are your parents??' (parts one and two) #vincent and isaac: BRUH S A M E S I E S #theo: **meme voice** 'is there anything worse than a rapist?' BOOM 'a child.' 'N O!' #jeanne: endearing but out of touch uncle while dazai is WOOOOO LET'S DRINK BLEACH uncle #sebastian: ah yes ty for the modicum of brain cells and competence that also shatters gender norms my good bi bitch #**Gilligan's cut to MC and Dazai wearing sunglasses and matching hats that read 'i put the (me) in disappointment'**

[jrueships]

What wips do you have rn 👀 elaborate pspspspsp

Too many wips.. thats what I have rn.. too many...

WJBFJEBF so the ones I'm most focusing on rn is the spiderman! Donovan/royce au!! So far I wrote the whole exposition and I'm working on the 'enticing incident' LMFAO it's upgraded from my last summary so I have more to write because I'm insane but yeah! It's the one I want done the most but I'm also gonna go on a trip with my buds to this place without wifi for like? Four days so 😭 I might have to finish it there and wait forever until I can post it! And I'm still unsure about the ending!!! THE STRUGGLE

a shorter fic I have in mind still is the russell waiting for kd at a table for two but he never shows up fic! I just really like writing russell widjsbf but not much action happens there! Many just dialogue and a lot of pg fashion/life roasting from Russell's inner dialogue. He's very judgemental of people who give off douchebag frat bro vibes but can't help but feel intrigued by them JABFJWB oh and he makes fun of pg simping for gold diggers

The fics I have written partly but put back in the burner are my donovan/jaylen fic, marcus/giannis, pg/kawhi jealousy fic, pg/kawhi sm*t fic, pg/kawhi space au, and john/trae patroclus and Achilles au! Mainly because they're super long and I get nervous about writing them too much and wasting all my muse on one thing, so I get scared and back off 😭 but I'll tell u the basic summary of them!!

💙 donovan/jaylen fic is based off the idea of donovan going grocery shopping and getting all mad at the thought of the clippers LMFAO. Basically he's at a grocery store getting flowers for his sports medicine doctor for always putting up with his bullshit (never wanting to sit down and relax so he can actually heal. Playing through the pain). But as he shops, he keeps finding the simplest shit that reminds him of the clippers. Like he sees a claw machine and thinks about Kawhi and how collected that guy is, just chillin in the upper stands, while his team is facing a possible defeat. Donny gets all frustrated because like?? He can't just do that? Just sit back and chill while his team is playing without him? Donny HAS to help, has to GET OUT THERE!! kawhi Doesn't... but kawhi is the one who won a championship. And donovan starts doubting his leadership skills and if he's really good for his team.. if he let them down by being Too pushy and Too in their faces.

+ and then when he's getting a cute card to go with the flowers, he spots one that says "you're the man!!" And he thinks about terance Mann and his great game against them, how proud pg, basically his mentor, was of him. And it makes donovan think about his loss and how he couldn't get that same pride out of Dwyane Wade.

Overall, everything makes him feel useless af and he almost kicks a shelf out of anger. But he calms himself down and goes back to the flowers because he actually only got this little dinky green plant still struggling to bloom? He got it for himself because he felt bad for it LMAO but he still needs to get flowers for his sports medicine doctor. He's goes back to the flower section and who does he see? JAYLEN BROWN all gussied up in his depression fit LMFAO.. but they both are. Jaylen and him try to joke but they're both tired and awkward so it sucks IABDKSBD they basically just ask what the other is doing there. Jaylen is just traveling rn because he got nothin else to do IWBDKS but he bought Deuce a souvenir gift! And he asks Donovan if he can help him put it in his trunk (but really he doesn't need donovan's help. He can pick the toy up himself. He just knows that Donovan is too stubborn to accept help when he needs it but he'll always try helping others out! So he wants donny to think he's helping jaylen but in reality jaylen is trying to help HIm because at the car he invites Donovan to go meet up at a hotel with him where they kiss and have sad *** to make themselves feel better WKBFKSBX) that's basically it!!!! I have literally everything written but the *** scene they're literally my weakness.. I love the emotions they make but I hate.. describing the actions it takes to make them?? Idk I just feel cheesy writing it? It's very tedious and boring to actually crank my brain for a synonym to 'moan' because I'm tired of using that word but it's the only word that really applies to that situation without sounding weird, yknow?? Just very tedious

💙💙💙 OK so marcus/giannis idk bro like... it's just taking so long IWBKENF idk what to say except giannis makes a ton of small jokes at marcus

💙💙 OK so pg/kawhi jealousy fic... BASICALLY the plot is LeBron hosts some big rich guy party for the NBA because I need a reason to write all these people that live far apart interacting together OKAY??? But anyways it takes place after 2020 lakers winning the championship! Pg convince the clippers to come or else they'll look bad for being the only team not coming and they media will have a field day with them, so the clippers join the party. Basically everyone who later team up in 2021 are talking to eachother LMFAO like James hardon+kyrie+kd are talking while russell westbrook and beal are bonding over dance moves with a jealous John wall pouting in the corner. Obligatory Marcus and giannis interactions because I can. Kyle and demar are laughing together. It's all goood until LeBron waltzes over with his weird ass feet and starts talking to kawhi. Hes being all Handsome and Strong and lowkey flexing his win. Its starting to make pg suspicious so he keeps intruding upon the conversation. His inner dialogue is basically a ton of lebron hate KABFKWB. LeBron sometimes comments back to pg but ends up kinda tuning him outta the conversation and sly dissing him to kawhi like "how does it feel talking to someone who doesn't hit the side of the backboard lol"

Pg is starting to get nervous because he's trying to compete against LEBRON over who's the better teammate for kawhi.. and with his current playoff history.. he's not gonna win. He keeps trying to get kawhi out of the conversation, but lebron keeps drawing him back in and pg ends up giving up or he risks looking like an overbearing girlfriend.. So he slinks off in hopes of distracting himself. Originally, pg thought KAWHI would be the one standing all alone awkwardly in the room with no one to talk to, but it's slowly becoming HIM who's the lonely one LMFAO. He tries joining in bradley and Russ's conversation because HEY!! Everybody leaves russ! Russ must be SUUUPER lonely and DESPERATE for someone to talk to him‼ especially when his old ex durant is out there plotting with his two hydra heads!! paul thought, anyways, but finds out russ is actually having the time of his life clowning around with beal !! That just makes pg even more envious and he walks away with zero satisfaction of feeling superior JABDJSB he tries talking to John wall like "this party fuckin sucks bro" but John kinda barks at him and pg gives up. He tries talking to marcus and giannis but that was a mistake because the two smartiest smartasses in the room start roasting him together so he's shunned back to pretending like he's getting 700 thirsty women in his dms, AKA pretending like he got a text on his phone while he leans alone on a wall LMFAO. After glancing up periodically (and casually) to see if kawhi is still talking to lebron, he later gives up on playing popular and goes to hide in the bathroom like a fucking loser WHDJBFJEBD in summary he kinda broods and steams about how much he hates lebron and how he's 'so much better than him' and he's just thinking of petty insults against him to try and convince the kawhi in his mind not to leave him for lebron. He gets really mad and punches a mirror, but thank God lebron is playing bass boosted music so no one at the party hears it.

But, demar ends up knocking on the door. He needs to shit. So pg is like.. what do I do with this broken mirror and my bleeding hand.. so he tries to keep demar out and they banter and eventually demar notices its kinda weird for pg to be huddled up in the bathroom instead of partying.. he must be getting high or smthin. So he's like "that's fucking stupid. He can go get high in one of lebrons 700 rooms. Why The bathroom." So he just opens the door LANKDN and sees The Scene.

At first he's like "are u paying for that.." to which pg responds with "uhhh. I tripped and hit my head on it" (while clutching a bleeding fist) but then he realizes OHHH pg must be ... OH is he.. no.. he can't be limp wristed... blah blah they end up bonding over their funny situations: demar being jealous of kawhi and feeling like kyle thinks he sucks because of him. Pg being jealous of lebron and feeling like kawhi thinks he sucks because of him. Blah blah it's a bittersweet ending pg becomes a little less of a jerk blah blah I haven't finished it because I'm stupid and WEAK

💙💙💙💙 pg/kawhi space au is just too long I have to be in the mood to write it or I end up dismissing good details I could have included if i wasn't in such a burnt out mind!

💙💙💙 pg/kawhi sm*t fic I gotta be in the mood to detail the h*rny right 😭😭

💙💙💙 john/trae patroclus and Achilles is mainly just an idea but with no plot!

But yeah!!! Those are SOME of my wips!! This post is really long tho so I'll just shout out those!!!@ thank u for the interest tho that's so cute 😭😭😭 it helps me write more when I have a plot lined up to look off of and remember ideas so this is really helpful to me too!!! I'll be shocked if u read this far tbh!! But anyways THANK U ALWAYS FOR THE ASKS, ANON!!!!!

#ted asks #this one is so long #ted drabbles

[literaphobe]

Im so sorry...is your sister a minor

yeah she’s 17. i really don’t blame her it just sucks. anyway i think i needed to work through this but its also way too long so 

lol like that was supposed to be my birthday gift but it has now become a romantic getaway for a man and his gf (who is 18 years younger than him) and my sister and one of her friends. at like. one of the most expensive hotels in the country. the same man who guilted me into giving private tutoring to 8 students at a time while i was a student because he apparently is super poor and has no money and no job. (i started tutoring for extra money and to just. have a job. because he has also given me shit about that before too. if i don’t have a job i’m like a useless baby child who he can never trust to be responsible for her own life. turns out that was just a load of bullshit to trap me. and yeah i was teaching 8-9 students at some point and i think i was like telling him hey i don’t know if this is a good idea. its a little crazy. and he was like no u should keep doing it. its money u should just earn it. we aren’t doing great financially and at some point we might need ur help paying for ur sister’s tutoring classes. and so i did and it hurt me SO much last semester. + covid but also. it was tutoring mostly lmao) 

anyway i just. the thought of everything made me cry a lot in the shower lol. like that. quiet cry where u are sobbing uncontrollably but u have to mute it as much as possible so that ur mother who’s washing dishes in the kitchen doesn’t hear it

today we had some ikea furniture delivered. and i was assembling it. and my mom told me “when we were married i was always the one putting together the IKEA furniture. ur dad would always get frustrated and give up” and then in the shower i realized that’s exactly how my dad treats me lmao. i am.... his ikea furniture

so like. i can actually trace the most recent incident of abuse i faced from him back to when. i allowed him to “help” me with my university degree transfer issues. u know. because i couldn’t do the coding degree he pressured me into doing. and wanted to do something else (i could’ve gone to my uni open house w my friends. who ended up entering the arts faculty. and i WANTED to do psychology in the arts faculty too. but my dad and his gf were there. and they just. told me if i did that i would have no future and no job prospects when i graduated. which is SO fucking funny because both of them individually. their grades were super fucking shit and they were never good enough to get into the school that i did. so they had no fucking business telling me what i should or shouldn’t do. but i didn’t know that because they lied to me. my dad lied to me about so many things to scare me into thinking i couldn’t do anything. and at this point in my life. they were still monitoring my internet usage. and there were restrictions set on my phone. mere. months. before i was meant to be a university student. even getting restrictions off my phone was a big fight i had to have. i bought my own laptop with money i made from this f&b job because i knew if i waited for them to get one for me i would be waiting forever. and i was just so fucking scared of them so i got a. ‘practical’ degree. and then slid off my adhd meds because even that felt like part of the trap they kept me in for years) 

i decided i wanted to do linguistics and become a linguistics major but my school wasn’t letting me. and it had been a year. so i let him and my mom get involved. which i had SUCH a bad feeling about. an awful awful bad feeling. i was right lmao. i should’ve known his involvement wouldn’t have done shit and would also. set me up for yet another Major Traumatic Incident. which i have spent the entirety of 2020 trying to avoid. do you know how stressful and tiring it feels to just like. every moment around ur own father is u just trying to walk on eggshells praying and hoping that nothing bad will happen. i tried so hard and it fell apart in the end anyway. he couldn’t fix this problem so he took it out on me

my school essentially texted us back saying “we get a shit load of transfer requests every year, even from students from other schools. ur grades from the classes u took aren’t good enough to justify a transfer” and like they were right. i had been off my meds. various things in life had happened. my commute situation wasn’t helping matters either (to and from was 2 hours each) and it has just. not been great. grandad passed away like 2 weeks ago or something at that point. which. may have been an underlying cause for the situation. or maybe he was always going to blow up at me and get violent and crazy. idk

anyway. i guess u could say it is ‘my fault’ for cutting off contact w my father n not speaking to him. but also. he threatened to throw me into a mental institute. and also. violently refused to let me leave the house so he could keep yelling at me. he physically would not let me. i yelled at him to just let me go but he implied that he would actually hurt me if i tried to get past him again. and he said all sorts of shit like he can be crazy too and he can be crazier than me which is something he’s said before. what triggered me to leave was. ok so in the beginning he was giving me the same thing he has yelled at me about over the years. i am super super fucking smart but i waste it all away on purpose and refuse to get my shit together and that’s somehow a personal attack on him. i can’t remember most of it by now. but anyway. i was tearing up and keeping absolutely quiet just waiting for it to be over so i could leave and go to another room. but then he started to. yell at me for crying. its so fucking ironic and weird because in a separate previous incident i was complaining about my school and how much it all was. and i was barely raising my voice but he was like woah woah stop being so emotional!!! as if he doesn’t regularly scream and shout and punch walls or whatever the fuck over the SMALLEST bullshit. anyway. he started to scold me for crying. and then he said ‘if you go out in the future and get a job are you going to cry like this too when ur boss scolds you? or are you acting like this because i’m family and you think its okay?’ as if. i have never had a job. as if i have never had to deal with a boss. bro i swear to fucking god. i am dead to most things now because of him. he can’t do shit. but. in the moment i found this so ridiculous and just SO fucking stupid that i left. i had had enough. i started laughing and i walked out and went to grab my bag so i could go. i didn’t. get very far obviously. and when my dad started threatening me i genuinely thought i was going to die. he was so angry and deranged that i thought he was going to murder me. my heart was going just. so so so fast. even tho i was just standing there. and i told him he was terrifying me (to which he said “GOOD”) and i just NEEDED to get out of this situation and get some space (to which he said “NO” repeatedly). he refused to admit that he would use actual violence to prevent me from leaving the house. he told me he would NEVER let me leave. which was fucking ridiculous. i stay at his house. 2 days out of the fucking week. he literally shoved me backwards so hard when i was trying to leave and he wanted to stop me. he also refused to admit that he used violence or was planning to use violence. i tried to point out this flaw in his logic to him. i said ur going to hurt me. he said no. i said ok then if ur not going to hurt me then let me walk past you and leave the house. he also said no again. and then our cousins rang the door at some point. so then he started to come to his senses. he was like. ‘the reason i don’t want to let you leave is because i’m afraid you’ll hurt yourself.’ which was so fucking stupid. i have NEVER threatened to hurt myself in front of him. i have never shared ANY thoughts of self harm in front of him. he’s the one who would get into massive fights w his dad and threaten to jump out of the window in anger (and i don’t even mean when he was younger. he would fight with his 93 year old dad. fucking stupid bitch). i made this clear to him that i was never ever planning on hurting myself. and then he said fine and let me leave. meaning i had to answer the door to my cousins in tears while he got to walk back to his room and lock himself in

he also. at some point during this argument, told me there would be consequences to me leaving. i guess i know those consequences now lmao. and like. i went home to my moms house. my cousins walked me there. i still haven’t told them. idk if my dad told them. my dad texted me to gaslight me. said that when he said he was going to put me in a mental hospital he meant it as a friendly suggestion because of ‘the state i was in’. and that it ‘wasn’t meant as a threat’ and like. oof. healthy suggestions aren’t meant to be yelled. anyway. i might be texting him. just to inform him about developments and to like. i guess set boundaries maybe. idk. i can’t carry on like this. i hate him and am terrified of him but. cutting him out of my life is basically inviting ostracism from his side of the family. and it’s putting so much stress on me. so. lol

#ask

[ayellowcurtain]

Spare us some LuKes?

Some soft LuKes fic?

Lucas’ worst nightmare turned into reality and ruined the best relationship he ever had with someone. He’s not a people’s person, but Kes was his person, his best friend. A selfish, wild spirit that would never settle for a monogamic relationship and Lucas should have known better. 

They wanted two very different things and that ruined their friendship. They went from being basically together every hour of every day to just hanging out for a few hours at parties on the weekends. Lucas misses Kes, misses their friendship, but that’s probably broken to the point of no repair. 

But Lucas doesn’t regret standing his ground for once. He was tired of being just a secret, late at night, underneath the covers. Sure, it was good to live in their bubble, but it gets to a point where having to stay inside, just the two of you, so you can kiss the guy you like gets annoying. 

Lucas drunkenly asked Kes to let them be boyfriends already and it took Kes by surprise, but he knew his answer, he said right away, “I can’t, Luc. I’m sorry.” 

He’ll never forget those words and the face Kes did while saying it. Like it would be painful to be public with Lucas. 

So they went their separate ways. Lucas is still lost, trying to figure out a life without Kes constantly around. They were best friend since they were kids, so it’s hard to be alone now. Obviously Jayden would hang out more with Kes, they’re both outgoing guys, different than Lucas. 

He cried, sobbed about Kes more times than he’ll ever be willing to admit. Sometimes he almost called Kes and agreed to staying hidden again, but he never did. At least he managed to save some of his pride and self-love.

There’s nothing to do at home, he walks around with no intent of doing or going anywhere. It’s just that he actually has absolutely nothing to do. He made every single homework he had to do for the next few weeks, read the books he needed to read. And now there’s nothing. He tried very hard to keep himself busy as much time as possible and even then he had time to kill. 

Kes was still living his life, obviously, not even missing Lucas. He threw himself back on his bed, grabbing his phone and opening his photos. One of the last ones is of Kes, of course. 

It was the last time they had sex at Kes’ place. His bedroom was way too hot afterward, they were sweaty and their lips sore from kissing so much, so Kes got up and opened the two doors that led to the backyard. 

Lucas watched from the bed as he looked up to the sun, streching himself before putting some shorts on. He’s the hottest guy ever, but in that moment, Lucas almost exploded from how turned on he felt just because Kes existed and was his for a few hours a day. 

So he rolled to lie on his stomach and grabbed his phone, taking the picture, Kes looking at him and smiling, his shorts so low it was almost obscene. 

“Come back to bed now...” Lucas asked nicely and Kes obeyed for once, teasing Lucas about how he could get things he wanted if he asked that nicely every once in a while. 

Lucas didn’t care to answer to him that day, too busy pulling him down for a kiss, but he thinks about it now. He thinks he asked nicely about being together for good. 

He was drunk and when Lucas is drunk, he lets his coolness aside and becomes a needy mess, especially when around Kes. That’s why he tries very hard not to get that drunk often. Because he feels stupid being this drunk in love that thinks Kes would ever give him a fucking shot. 

Lucas looks at the picture one more time and closes afterward, moving on to instagram. There are no new photos or stories from Kes, but Jayden just posted a picture of him and Kes that Lucas never saw. Maybe it’s a new one, after their fight. 

when @kes_senova was still alive, out of his house. would love for you to pick up your phone sometimes, bro, I miss youuuuu 

And Lucas almost drops his phone when he receives a message as he’s zooming in on the picture, on Kes’ not too happy face. 

from Kes: I miss you so much

Lucas looks around, feeling like he might have done something that Kes could see that he was stalking him. He sent two texts so Lucas clicks on the notification to see the rest. 

I’m sorry for being a constant fuck up 

He reads the messages a few times, Kes is still online and Lucas hopes he’s there, also looking at his phone, anxiously waiting. 

to Kes: I miss you too 

Sorry 

for not being what you expect of me 

Kes starts typing right away and it feels like it doesn’t take a second until Lucas gets an answer.

from Kes: stop 

You know that’s bullshit 

I’m just fucking confused, Luc

but it doesn’t mean I want anything to change between us, even tho it already did

and I fucking hate it so much 

Lucas is about to text back when Kes’ number and photo appears on his screen, waiting for him to accept or decline the phone call. He looks at it, panicking a little, but he misses him too much and so he accepts the call before Kes can give up. 

He exhales loudly on the other side and Lucas waits, hating how he can tell Kes is also struggling just by the way that he sighs and says, almost whispers afterward, “Can I come to your place? We need to figure this out. I can’t go another day without talking to you like we used to. Kissing you like we used to...”

“Kes...” Lucas misses him, but he’s not wiling to change his rules. They can be best friends again, of course, but if there are kisses and hidden nights on Kes’ plans, nights that nobody can know, Lucas is out. 

“Look, we’ll figure it out, ok? Tonight! And if you don’t want me back, it’s okay. But let me try, Luc...” 

He sounds like he means it and Lucas feels like he might be losing his mind without seeing Kes. 

“Okay...you can come.” 

#skam nl #lucas van der heijden #kes de beus #lukes #skamnl #lets just put Lucas with everyone since skamnl won't give us his season!

[gins-potter]

Chicago PD 8x12 Thoughts

I feel like this case is going to be interesting

Which is kind of morbid I guess

Hailey still be looking cute in her blue jacket tho

Wait what he never even picked them up?

And this is why I don’t trust ride share apps (I know this makes me sound like a boomer but I’m terrified of getting into the wrong car)

This victim having the same name as me gives me the heebie jeebies

Wow that shot of Voight’s silhouette was really nice

The OC shows have really been branching out with their cinematography lately and I love it

Oh shit

I find it... interesting that they’re choosing to tell this story about a bad guy getting off because of the increased scrutiny on police tactics but like if the original officers/detectives investigating had done it the right way Caleb never would have gotten out 🤷🏻‍♀️

... she’s a hell of a cop who used excessive force?? Idk about where this episode is going

Well shit, there’s another one

Why do I feel like Voight is gonna lose it soon?

I feel like it’s an interesting conversation they’re trying to have but idk i don’t know if it’s landing - maybe I’m just too tired or something

Ah come on Hailey

Those two women would still be alive if the fucking original cop had done her job the right way 🙄

Honestly I don’t get why they’re coddling this chick, no she didn’t do what she had to do to make the city safe, she broke the rules and fucked over the case, why didn’t she just wait for a warrant?

God I love badass Kim

Oh my god it’s a tattoo I thought that guy had an actual bug on his face 😬

Is Voight about to go all PD s1 on his ass?

Come on Jay step in and say something

Oh nah do not bring Adam into your fucking shady shit

Fuck off Hailey

ADAM WALK THE FUCK OUT OF THERE

Oh for fuck’s sake

This feels like one massive step back for the show

They really have learnt fucking nothing, huh?

Ohhhhhh well alright

Maybe they have

Well shit Voight

Like I get how frustrating and horrible it must be for them to know who the perp is and not being able to make the case but like you can’t justify crossing the line when that same justification is used for police brutality against innocent people

Bro don’t do it

Okay but even if he does reach for the gun, Voight knows it’s got no bullets? So 🤷🏻‍♀️

So this chick showed up and potentially screwed up the case again? Do these people not learn?

See exactly my point, she shows up and potentially screws up the case again and Voight has to lie to save it

I feel like they’re trying to make me feel sorry for this chick but I just really don’t. Sorry but you’re a cop, you gotta be held to a high standard.

Final thoughts:

Idk this episode just wasn’t it for me

I feel like it was really a step back for the show regarding police brutality after what has been a really solid season

The case was actually interesting but it was all the bullshit going on around it that I wasn’t a fan of

#oc spoilers #one chicago #Chicago pd

[writeinmysoul]

I feel the need to state that this isn’t an attack on tony but an attack on extreme tony stans and y’all reasonings.

Disclaimer before y’all dumbasses get in my comments and say stupid shit about my opinions on tony. I genuinely like tony stark. He’s a really great hero and he’s flawed but good. And he tries. He tries so hard. But he’s still so flawed, but that���s part of why he’s such a good hero, because sometimes, he’s the most relatable and human out of most of them, and y’all assholes seem too forget that.

I just realized how fucking much I hate tony stans like. It took me a second to realize why tho since I actually do like tony stark. But I realize, I’m really just extreme anti tony Stan narratives. At least half the time, people act like tony was never wrong and could do no wrong. Even tho part of the reason people even like him is because of his fuck ups and want to do better or right. Because he was real and had his struggles and it’s so easy to sympathize with him and such. And yet, tony stans will still sit there and act like he has literally never done any wrong. He’s done a shit ton of wrong in his life, which is part of the reason he’s constantly wanting to do better and work harder and help more people. Like it’s literally a whole fucking part of what makes him who he fucking is. Then you’ll sit there and act like Ultron wasn’t 100% his fault. I’m so fucking sick of hearing the whole, “no one listened to him. He said what was coming and no one cared. Blah. Blah. Fucking blah.” Bitch, I can’t listen to someone who ain’t fucking talking to me. He deliberately created Ultron behind his team’s back when he hadn’t even talked to them about what was to come until he royally fucked up after the fact. But everyone pretends that the reason they weren’t ready for thanos is because no one listened to him. Shut tf up. Like.

And the whole accords thing. Like. It’s straight bullshit. And tony was on his shit when he thought they were a good idea. And like, a huge motivating factor for it is his guilt, cause from iron man 1-3, it is extremely fucking unlikely he would’ve fucking signed it then. Probably not even after the first avengers. And who’s to really say if he would’ve signed it if it wasn’t for the fucking mom that confronted him. And like, i understand his intentions in both age of Ultron and I’m civil war. And his intentions were good and I get it. But like, you still massively fucked up. And what pisses me off about him in civil war is that, they don’t need to be held accountable for the battle of New York cause that was strictly the government’s fault. No one else’s. Age of Ultron? Strictly Tony’s and partially Bruce’s fucking fault. So why does the whole team need to be punished for him not talking to his fucking team? Civil war? Both Steve and Tony’s cause neither of them would sit the fuck down and actually fucking compromise. Steve was too fucking stubborn and tony was too fucking blinded by arrogance and guilt and naïveté. “Do it now or it’ll be done to us later.” That shit. wow. Like, bro, it’s already being fucking done to you. You have no real other options. Sign or stop. That’s not a real choice bro. Wtf. And in what world do you think that’s a good argument to sign?nah. Fuck you. For a genius, you’re dumb asf. Like. And what really pisses me off is the fact that like, we still know he’s still going to blatantly fucking ignore most of the rules. You got peter on your side right, but you know he doesn’t want to tell his aunt who he is, so you clearly must’ve not told him all the accords would’ve said if he still fought. Cause the accords would’ve wanted his identity too. So we know that when the time came, Tony would push to let peter keep his identity secret when they tried to force peter to identify himself. And we know the government would do it cause they did it in the defenders and agents of shield. Right. So tony was gonna ignore that rule for peter or he was gonna force peter to reveal himself which is fucked on both ends.

Then, he ignored the accords when he went to Steve in Siberia and wanted it off record so he wouldn’t have to be held accountable like the others would’ve if they came back. So fuck out of here. And we know, tony doesn’t follow fucking rules. The only people he was willing to listen to half the time was pepper and Steve. And that wasn’t always either. He was sure as hell not going to follow every rule laid out even tho he’s the reason it got as far as it did. And what really really pisses me off, and I really didn’t think about this til now, is the fact that like, he wouldn’t trust his own fucking suits in the hands of the government. But he’s willing to trust his teammates’ lives and missions in the hands of the government? Really? Gonna trust Bruce’s life in the hands of secretary Ross who has been wanting to experiment on Bruce and get his hands on him? Wanna trust your teammates’ lives in the hands of the people who repeatedly lie to you and have their own agendas that they will no doubt invoke onto the team? Man. Like, fuck the team, they’re not the only people who are affected by this. You’re affecting hundreds if not more, heroes fucking lives just because you’re fucking feeling guilty for your own fucking creation even tho you’re not gonna follow the rules you fucking signed.

And what pisses me off about most of these tony stans that all wanna fucking get behind the accords is, y’all call team cap fans dumbasses and shit. But like, you’re the ones stupid enough to trust a government that has proven themselves faulty in every fucking mcu movie. And you know goddamn well that if they had a president such as trump and his cabinet, how fucking fucked every single one of them would be. Especially once Sam took over the mantle as captain America. So fucking tell me again why you’re dumb enough to fucking trust the accords? Fuck y’all. That shit ain’t going to do anything but more harm than good. And when people refuse to sign and refuse to fight, where tf will you be when there’s no more heroes. Fucking dead. Which is why they’ll fucking fight even if they don’t sign. Which then, they’re risking both their lives and their freedoms for your dumbasses. Fuck you. There’s a lot more I could say. But I’m tired of typing on my phone.

Sidenote, Steve Rogers may be my fave, but he’s not why I made this post. At least, not the sole reason, part of why was an “anti Steve” tagged post that was saying “you’re either team iron man or team dumbass.” And I’ve made a lot of posts like this before, even without factoring in Steve, but it irritates me when people act like Steve was the only fuck up. And i see some dumbass posts about why Steves team was bad or whatever. And some of the arguments, esp any single one includes Bucky are so beyond idiocy. I can rant about Steve’s stupid ass decisions too. Lying to tony about his parents? Really Steve? Really you fucking asshole? What really pissed me off with Steve is smashing Tony’s chest plate in, I have never been more pissed at my fave. And not compromising. Tony didn’t compromise, but neither did fucking Steve. And it was ridiculous and on both their heads that it got as far as it did. Steve is only seeing things in black and white, and it isn’t always like that. But neither or tony was trying to see down the middle. It was a whole fucking mess.

Also, this doesn’t change the way I feel about anti Tony’s. Y’all dumb as shit too. Like, your arguments and opinions are worse than extreme tony stans. Like, you just really want to hate on him for the dumbest things and act like he hasn’t grown or changed and I can shoot every single one of your arguments down but you’re dumb and won’t listen like, so fuck out of here. Y’all will say anything to try to prove tony is oh so bad, and yet, you don’t even acknowledge the shit that’s worn acknowledging in point out actual supported flaws, such as shit I mentioned. So stfu and sit tf down.

Anti Steve’s? Y’all can sick my dick or my clit, but your opinions are also fucking irrelevant, and I will fight you. Really tho, I would fight any mcu hero anti. Like, none of them deserve to be absolutely hated. I understand just not caring much about a character one way or another, but then y’all will hate any fucking character for the dumbest reasons and it pisses me off. I will defend every single fucking mcu hero, but I will also call them out for the shit that they did. Like. You can like a hero or anyone really, and acknowledge fault or flaws. But y’all just ain’t got common sense. So leave me alone. Like. Fuck outta here. Anyway. I’m done for real, goodnight. I would turn off comments if I knew how to, but I don’t so whatever.

#tony stark #steve rogers #civil war #age of ultron #captain america civil war #avengers age of ultron

[howaboutfondue]

Answer 1-32 for the ask thing ;p

Hey guys look, my gf think she’s a smart ass and i won’t answer them all ;)

It took me a while but time to do it baby!!!

SORRY NOT SORRY FOR THE LONG POST Y’ALL!!!

1) Describe them in 3 words

dumbass, cute, small ;p

2) Their favourite style of clothing

retro, although she’s a lazy ass so just wears hoodies all the time :// looks really good in her mom’s shirt tho ;p

3) What mannerisms do they have?

oh boy where do i even start… hhh that thing she does whenever she sees something cute or funny and she just screams. Like i be sitting there, chilling, telling her abt something and then i suddenly hear a screech in my ears and i look at the screen and she’s just playing with her cat. adorable. also the way she looks at me sometimes when she thinks im “””cute”” or whatever :// she’s just hhhh so so heckin cute and making me blush ;;;; or whenever we’re being Soft and she just curls into a ball under the blankets and looks like the cutest tiny person on this planet ahhhhh cutie!! or whenever she blows a kiss unexpectedly >.> asshole, or- djkfgh honestly there’s just too many

4) Do they play an instrument?

she keeps playing games with my heart~ ;((

bc she lives on the other side of the planet

5) How did you meet/become introduced to them?

through a jse sleepover discord server kdfjgh since the very beginning i wanted to talk to her, idk why, she just seemed like such a radical bro fam

boy was i wrong :// tsk tsk….. jk bby love u :* ur still lame tho ;p

6) Favourite thing they’ve ever said/texted/messaged?

hooo boy i honestly don’t know, she says so many sweet things ;;;; well, when she’s not being an asshole that is :///

7) What do you like doing with them?

;))))))))

well talking is pretty much all we can do so ksdjfgh uhhh i guess talking abt what we’ll do once we meet or sharing cursed memes

8) Their favourite colour

blue 💙………….. or is it purple fuck-

9) Do they keep up to date on pop culture?

…… i had to make her watch shrek a couple weeks ago bc she’s never seen it…. i’d say that’s a no.

10) Sweetest thing they’ve done for you?

uhhhhh exist??? talk to me???? be my lovely gf??? ://

11) Have you dreamed about them?

oh boy have i….

12) Have they dreamed about you? (if you know)

yes she has, i haunt her in her dreams

13) Can they dance?

proooobably not tbh, although i can’t be sure unless i see it right? ;)

14) What does hugging them feel like?

wish i fucking knew fam

15) Your favourite thing about them?

lkdfjghfkdskjfghfkdsjfdkfjgh do you really expect me to name just one thing mate. Ok but the first thing that comes to my mind iiiis probably how she’s everything i’ve ever wished for??? like…. literally dskfjgh and i never expected that from her! like yeah we were good friends and all but i never expected her to be this amazing. Truly the best gf :*

16) Their favourite thing about you?

idk, probably how hot, smart, sexy and intimidating i am ;p 

17) Best memory of you together?

the night i asked her if she wants to be my girlfriend ^^

18) What are they like when they’re tired?

soft!!!! hella soft and sweet and i wish i could cuddle with her and sleep together uwu

19) Could you imagine growing old together with them?

well like she said, we’re each other’s first and we’re ldr, it’s kinda hard to tell ^^;;;

20) Could they imagine growing old together with you?

see for yourself

21) What would an ideal date with them be?

honestly i’ll take anything at this point-

but ideal? hmm…… probably going out somewhere nice or oh! walking around my town, showing her around, seeing her all excited cutieee and THEN going somewhere nice and hohohehe who knows what’s next ;) and yeah djkfgh although sneaking out somewhere in the middle of the night would be great too….. and well, there’s something more but we’re gonna keep it soft ^^

22) Are they competitive?

she keeps saying she’s gonna beat my ass in mario kart and sorry, although i highly doubt it :/// even tho i’ve never played either i’m still gonna destroy her

23) What do you do together?

text and face time. yup. that’s all we can do skdfjg sometimes we watch sth on rabbit together, and once we played some knock-off emoji edition Uno and i kept beating her ass ;pp

24) Which smells remind you of them?

the smell of bullshit :///

25) Do they remind you of any music?

hehe we have playlists for eachother ^^

also fingers in his ass

26) Could you tell them your biggest secret?

already have~

27) Could they tell you their biggest secret?

already has~

28) How do you greet each other?

either by being like “uwu hewwo can we tawk towday or awe you busy? ówò” or by sending a bad meme/joke and calling each other fuckers

29) What makes you blush that they do?

whenever she’s being sweet and cute and looking at me Like That and is like “i love u sm ur my gf!” like excuse me did i fucking ask >.> love u too tho

30) What makes them blush that you do?

those sick dabs

31) Would you say you love them?

absolutely yes!!!!!! love you baby!!!!!! so much!!! muah!! :*

32) Would they say they love you? 

of course i mean who wouldn’t come the fuck on im the best there is out there try to disagree with me and i’ll fucking use your piece of shit face as a doormat

but for real no lol she like hates me bro 

#love you baby :* #have a fun read <3 #and sorry it took so long ;; #LONG POST #sorry yall but i just gotta gush abt my gf ya know #gf ask #best ask :*

[allofthisnonsenseplease]

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 That's actually kind of a fun idea :oo reaper and 76 having no prior history

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 What would cause them to start interacting, tho? And what would they be fighting for? If they weren't in SEP & Overwatch together, the fall of OW leaves them no bitter enmity. oooh...what if Reaper was with Talon all along, Jack was with Overwatch, shit i was gonna say they got interested in each other but didn't realize, but that wouldn't work until post fall

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 Yeah I was thinking like Jack doing his thing in overwatch the whole time and gabe being in Talon the whole time And not crossing paths until post fall I mean they knew OF each other before that But didn't interact until after

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 right, right. but if they met each other with just their regular personas, and, like, i dunno, started bitching about the state of the world today and what's it all come to and they have grumpy old men feeding birds in the park dates before they find out that one is Reaper and the other is Soldier 76

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 ahahaha awwwwww gabe figures out who jack is pretty quickly just based on context clues and the fact that jack gives a total of zero fucks

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 finds out he's 76, you mean? 'cause i always feel like once he hits that point, he gives a lot of fucks about not being recognized as strike commander morrison. not that he's any good at hiding it. XD

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 YEAH 76 not sc i feel like in this version of events gabe wouldn't know jack's face well enough to identify him as the former sc awww they'd be so cute tho, just sitting on a park bench together, jack grumbling at the birds but still feeding them anyway gabe shaking his head, utterly amused, and pointing out that the bread crumbs jack's been giving them are terrible for the ducks that have been coming around jack just replies with a  grumpy "fuck them"

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 XD Jack, you bastard! What if, despite Talon, Gabe is still somehow more idealistic than Jack? Like, he thinks the path to making the world a better place lies in siding with this group at least for a while, but Jack just thinks everything has gone to shit and there's barely any point.

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 awwww QoQ their light conversation about the birds suddenly seems to be a big metaphor for much darker things

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 whoopsy daisy! XD

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 gabe counters jack's nihilistic attitude towards the birds (and apparently everything else) with some optimism and jack just kinda gives him a sideways glance asks in his grumbly coarse way, "what well-meaning conman fed you such convincing bullshit?" gabe wonders, silently, why someone who has been beaten down this much by the world is still fighting for it

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 Maybe he realizes that Jack isn't--he's not part of a group fighting for something bigger, he's working on his own and largely protecting small communities from gangs that move in. The thought makes him laugh, because it seems like, deep down, maybe Jack isn't quite so different...it's just the scale of what they see in front of them. ((like, i typed all that up assuming that Gabe is offing threats while in Talon and trying to do good while using them--possibly with the goal of getting rid of Talon itself once he's done))

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 qoq and then the time finally comes when one of gabe's missions for talon involves innocents as collateral damage and soldier 76 shows up

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 IN THE NAME OF THE MOON, HE'LL--no sorry wrong series

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 LOLLLLLL gabriel doesn't want to fight him so he tries to reason the big picture and all

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 NOPE

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 but jack morrison is done with big pictures

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 this is the core argument for the season i just finished fyi

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 omg what a coincidence

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 lol anyways Reaper being all 'You can't be so naive! Things aren't black and white, and there's no way to move forward without sacrifices.' Jack is just FUCK YOUR SACRIFICES EVERYTHING SUCKS ALREADY DON'T GO MAKING IT WORSE

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 jack will take your ideals and KICK THEM IN THE GODDAMN FACE BEFORE BURNING THEM he wrestles gabe to the ground and snarls that he will die before he lets fucking talon harm a single hair on a child's head and gabriel should be fighting for his life but he kind of falls a little in love right then and there

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 d'awww are we playing this serious, or does Gabe arch suggestively beneath him and tell Jack that if he wants to save anyone he's gonna have to come up with one hell of a distraction?

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 omgggggg jack freezes, caught between his total of two emotions he's been too spiteful to be thirsty the past several years

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 OH GOD GABE/REAPER HAS IT ALL

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 LOL jack doesn't give in - not yet, anyway, not this time - but gabe can see that he wants to he can work with that

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 JACK BEING A THIRSTY FUCK

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 for now, gabe's willing to count jack's several seconds of indecision as a victory

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 lol He tells Jack he'll concede this time since Jack's reaction was so intriguing. Jack can HEAR him smirking, and it pisses him off.

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 especially because goddammit that's attractive,,, FUCK,,, he's just a little too slow with his next punch. gabe is already wisping away

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 hahaha what if, back on the bench later on, Jack REALLY AWKWARDLY propositions Gabe and claims it's 'cause he needs to take the edge off. XD

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 omggggg JACK YOU USELESS HORNY MOTHERFUCKER too lazy to rub one out himself, has to fuckin proposition his bro dude

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 like, he doesn't even really mean to, he just opens his big stupid mouth and the words fall out all over each other

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 XDDDDDD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 hey, handling it himself just isn't the same. XD

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 XDDD gabe hates that when he tries to say no because terrible idea all that comes out is a snarky "your place or mine?"

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 XD

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 "or," he amends, patting the bench, "if you don't care about having an audience..."

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 i'm still trying to come up with what Jack would say, and so far the best vote is 'What are you doing tonight? I need to get wrecked in the worst way.' orz i guess this is still him giving zero fucks XD

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 omg jackieeeee bee gabe starts accidentally going on a snarky ramble bc he's,, actually kinda nervous and jack just gets tired of the bullshit and smooches his face

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 !! ^^ smooches him good, pulls back just a bit and cups him thru his jeans and asks, voice low 'you interested or not?' AND SUDDENLY THE TABLES HAVE BEEN TURNED XD

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 gabriel, all starstruck, breathes a "y-yeah" and lets jack drag him off the bench gabriel assumes jack takes him back to his safe house, but it's admittedly kind of a blur given that all he could look at the entire time was jack's ass

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 it's like watching a real, live lego man, he thinks

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 AHAHAHA am i really this fucking hyped to wreck that stupid rectangle? goddammit i really REALLY AM

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 X'D they balance each other out so well this time XD

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 XDDDD gabe wakes up out of his trance when he's suddenly lying in jack's bed with a ripped as all hell grump on top of him

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 c'mon Gabe, get with the program!! Wake up and give him something to remember next time you come on to him in your goth persona!

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 LOLLLL fondle the boobs man just DO IT

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 Gabe makes Jack VERY happy that he asked

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 especially when things inevitably get rough and jack is Very pleasantly surprised that gabe can keep up more than keep up, really not many people can hold him down so easily if he weren't so out of his mind from it, he might think it strange another thing he didn't think through due to his intense Thirst........ he just brought a relative stranger back to his safe house smart move jack

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 lol OH WELL IT'S ONLY GABE WHAT'S THE WORST THAT COULD HAPPEN ((Reaper waiting there for him the next night with a rose clipped int he mouth of his mask))

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 LOLLLL GABE!!!

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 XD

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 you motherfucker XDDDD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 nah, nah. then the game would be over too soon altho, if 76 shows up next time and is all 'haha you thought i'd go for you, but I got my kicks elsewhere thanks, so fuck off with your noise' I kinda feel like he'd want some sort of petty revenge

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 omgggggg YOU FOOL YOU PLAYED YOURSELF my favorite phrase is relevant once again XDDDD maybe he shows off his most Sexy (tm) assets while being like "oh so you really want none of this ???" reaper: spawns one (1) tentacle 76: throws down his gun, immediately surrenders

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 X''''''D JACK NO YOU TOOK STEPS TO PREVENT THIS

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 he cannot resist the Tentacle tho it is jack's ultimate weakness gabe finds out about this by accident, of course

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 At the park next time, Gabe casually asks if Jack needs him again, thinking smugly that of course he does. But Jack is just. 'Listen. Last time isn't gonna cut it. I need you to fuck me up, understand??' Jack's way of asking to be saved from himself lol

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 OMG AKJNDFKADNFADF gabe is a little taken aback but is like YES SIR jack fists his collar and his eyes are kinda wild and scary and gabe is way too into it and he snarls "i don't think you get it. i need you to fuck me up. are we clear?"

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 XD get it gabe!

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 this is when gabe finds out that jack is into some Shit but oh god gabe miscalculated. jack is sleeping with him to avoid sleeping with.... him. also he really wants to see how wild jack would get if he brought out the tentacles for real. but he can't do that. yet.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 XD But wait. What if Jack tells Gabe 'Sorry, but you just don't have the right equipment to give me what I need.' and Gabe is just 'exCUSE ME???'

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 KJSNFASKDJFN "YOU'RE GONNA HATE ME FOR THIS BUT I HOPE IT'S NOT ENOUGH TO MAKE YOU NOT WANNA FUCK ME ANYMORE BUT--" omg gabe feeling weirdly gratified when he's fooling around w 76 as reaper but 76 says his name, not knowing it's him

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 omgomg XD Jaaaaack.... wanting Gabe but needing those tentacles....u bad thing

firesonic152 - 08/04/2017 emotionally needs gabe but the rest of him just wants to get wrecked enough to forget everything that's ever happened to him omg ahhh but this whole time gabe didn't know he was sc!! he just knows jack has a chip on his shoulder for some reason

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/04/2017 ahhh you're right what if...with the needs of his body being met, Jack slowly starts to open up to Gabe? Particularly after they've been together. It's never as rough as with Reaper, Gabe will draw things out to make him beg or cry, and Jack always ends up feeling a different sort of exhausted wrapped up in Gabe's arms afterward. (idc if Gabe does know about Jack--Gabe's a cuddler! XD)

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 okay, i LITERALLY just laid down to go to bed, but i pulled my computer back out to send you this before i forget it. What if the Strike Commander position really was just a figurehead? Like, if Jack had far less power than he's made out to hold? Like, the UN is in charge of what missions are accepted, how many personnel are approved to go, what weapons they can have, how long they can fight before they're recalled and it's writen off. Jack is basically the middle man, there to handle small problems that crop up and relay orders from the top and to be a fall guy, but, really, he isn't supposed to do anything without their approval. okay night night <3

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 yeah no wonder Jack is filled with hatred LOL As they're cuddling one night, Jack admits quietly, "I used to be someone important." He laughs without humor. "Least, they let me think I was."

How would Gabe react to finding out Jack was sc :thinking: probably sympathetically, given Jack's previous rambles/rants about how his job was a shitshow and he was pretty useless in a lot of cases but I want drama so hmmmmmm

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 What if gabe had a shot at joining SEP, but the last available slot was given to this Jack Morrison asshole who later became SC? Also, I guess Gabe doesn't know Jack's last name, apparently? XD

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 omg!!!! LOL yeah Jack probably wouldn't give it up so easily He's shitty at stealth, not stupid...... actually wait he is kinda dumb BUT HE HAS..... some...... common sense??????

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 XD just a smidge. we wouldn't want to get carried away.

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 .... self loathing, that's what he has doesn't wanna be attached to that name anymore there we go XDD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 lol perfect.

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 Jack lets something slip and Gabe finally puts it together Gabe sits upright and stares. "Wait. You're Jack.... Morrison? Like...." Jack waits for the inevitable vitriol, tense and looking away. "The Jack Morrison who took my SEP slot?" This was not the accusation Jack was expecting. His head turns to stare at Gabe "What?"

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 XD SUCK IT JACK YOU DID EVERYTHING WRONG AND THEN SOME!!

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 LOLLL "You stole my shot at fame and glory!" Gabe accuses, a hint of a grin pulling on his lips, unable to keep up the charade. "Fuck you, man."

Jack shifts uneasily, caught between Gabe's good natured reaction and his reflex to use anything and everything as fuel for his self loathing

"For what it's worth, it was a pretty shitty gig," he finally offers.

"A year of potentially lethal injections and near-fatal side effects, then a short stint actually helping during the crisis, and then just..." He visibly wilts. "Years... Decades, actually, of being a puppet."

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 jack. jaaaaaaaaaaaaaack. stop. enough.

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 He loves to party that jack Always throwing pity parties for himself

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 lol

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 I can't find a party hat emoji :((

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 huh. lame.

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 Well there's these :tada::tada::tada::tada::confetti_ball::confetti_ball::confetti_ball: Close enough Oh here's the drama(??). Now that Gabe knows the full extent of Jack's identity, he Definitely cannot reveal his own

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 :tada: :disappointed_relieved: :birthday:

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 LOL

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 there. a pity party.

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 Perfect

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 why does that change things? he already knew Jack was 76 and kinda burnt out on the big fight while still having some trace of his ideals left.

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 Tru :thinking: Maybe just the fact that like. Before this Gabe didn't really consider 76 an enemy of Talon specifically and more just a general hazard to look out for. But the strike commander was absolutely an enemy of Talon, and that's a dangerous position to be in. If anyone else in Talon found out Jack Morrison is still alive, it'd be bad news for Jack

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 You think he'd try to talk Jack out of seeing Reaper?

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 omg Maybe he just casually like... "So if you were strike commander you fought against Talon right....?" That Gabriel, smooth as silk

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 lol 'and...this other guy...the well-equipped one...isn't he with Talon?'

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 LOL NICE Gbe ... What happened phone *GABE Jack sends Gabe a sharp sideways glance, keen enough to realize Gabe has an ulterior motive with this line of questioning but too dumb (lbr) to figure out what it is

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 maybe he thinks it's just good old fashioned jealousy? XD

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 LOL yeah he would

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 or would that be a stretch, given his low self-worth?

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 he has zero sense of self worth in terms of his value as a person but he still has a realistic sense of his worth in bed XDD Probably thinks Gabe is jealous as a bed partner, not anything more

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 oh. that would be funny if it wasn't so sad.

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 :)) "Are you..." Gabe hesitates, trying to remember how much he's supposed to know question did Jack fuck reaper yet I forget XDD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 yeah. tentacles.

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 >||3c

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 like, i don't think Reaper went full on tentacles--at least not  the first time--but Jack had tentacles and ran back to Gabe in the hopes that getting Fucked Up would keep him from wanting the tentacles. Spoiler alert: it Did Not.

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 LOLLL LITTLE DOES HE KNOW Gabe bringing up reaper is digging up some unwanted desires for Jack so he cuts off the conversation with a meaningfully heated kiss "I slept with him once," Jack admits breathily when he pulls away, staring at Gabe's mouth. "It was fun but..." god damn was it fun "I'm lying in bed with you right now aren't I?"

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 Jack, that's not exactly...I mean, kudos for not lying, but... XD

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 he's baiting :eyes: Simultaneously assuring Gabe that he has his attention while also leaving open the possibility of someone else stealing him away so that Gabe is incited to do what he can to get rid of that as an option

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 Smarter than he looks. =/ XD

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 Only when it comes to thirst LOL :heart: Gabriel hates that even though his rival in this situation is himself, Jack's gambit still works He bears down on top of Jack, pressing Jack's back into the mattress as he kisses him Covering Jack's body with his own. A possessive move. Jack doesn't bother hiding his satisfaction. Man so if Jack didn't have Gabriel during that whole stretch of time from sep to end of overwatch... He never had any significant romantic relationships At least I can't imagine he would have had any success in that area? Just a whole lot of meaningless hookups when he could manage it AHAHA God he's gonna suck at this Gabriel probably had a few crushes and things but not anything terribly significant either

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 Oh, dear. Jack is at even MORE of a disadvantage than usual.

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 Gabe asks him on a date and he combusts

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 Jack: You want...what? [cannot process. does not compute] Jack:...WHY???

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 LOLLL Jack: date... like........ sex but with rose petals on the bed??? Gabe: no like I want to take you to a nice restaurant Jack, struggling: to......... to do some kind of semi-public thing or Gabe: Gabe: looks at the camera

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 X'''''''''''D Jack: but...i'm already sleeping with you. you don't have to...uhh...earn it.

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 dkakdkakxka at which point Gabe realizes this is a deep dark pit he's uncovered

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 OH ONLY JUST NOW REALIZING IS HE? Gabe starts actually feeling bad for Jack oh shit. what if it translates into Reaper being more gentle, too? And Jack is just: ???????????i came for tentacles?? not sweetness???? haha unintended double entendre

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 LOLL djakcjakczlx Gabe is in too deep - said Jack never >||3c

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 pffffffffffffffft X'''''''''''''''''''''D

firesonic152 - 08/05/2017 ghhhhhh what if gabe asking jack out on a proper date freaks jack out a little bit so he does a quick calculation and decides taking his chances with reaper is better than risking further romantic advances at the moment and starts avoiding gabriel in favor of reaper (AGAIN, LITTLE DOES HE KNOW LOL)

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/05/2017 omg omgomg And he's like, well, at least I don't have to worry about the bloodthirsty mercenary expecting anything but a quick fuck from me. Except, instead of examining his life choices, he just blindly follows Reaper out of the end of a firefight and into a nearby safehouse...which happens to be stocked with an easily reheated, nice homemade meal, a bottle of wine, and some flickering LED candles in the bedroom.

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 LOL JACK U FOOL!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD GET FUCKED UP YOU THOUGHT!!!!!!

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/06/2017 well, he can, but with a nice meal and some romantic lighting. XD

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 XDDD jack walks in, sees the romantic setup, and has to do more mental math tentacles.... versus romance............ give him a moment, he's not very good at math

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/06/2017 XD COME ON JACK YOU KNOW THOSE TENTACLES ARE WORTH IT

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 AHAHAHA

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/06/2017 jeezus. it's only the romance that's dubcon. XD

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 XDDDDD GABE JUST WANTS TO TREAT U RIGHT JACKIE JESUS jack jokes, only a tiny bit of discomfort in his voice, that he hopes the big bad reaper hasn't gone and fallen for a worn down old soldier. reaper doesn't deny it.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/06/2017 oh. my. god. ;_; dude. not cool. upsetting.

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 :kissing_heart:

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/06/2017 don't you kissy face me

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 :kissing_closed_eyes:

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/06/2017 LOOK HERE what does Jack do next while that silence is growing longer and more fraught with meaning?

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 laugh nervously and try to goad reaper into throwing him into a wall?

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/06/2017 think he'd get pissed? I mean, as angry and full of spite and self-loathing as this Jack is, when confronte with something he doesn't like, anger or violence seem likely modes of rejection.

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 absolutely yeahhh gabe is a stealthy dude he just likes birds man anyway jack of course gets pissed at the show of affection from reaper of all people and gabriel's heart hurts jack wants to start a fight, wants to get fucked up, but gabriel doesn't think he can do it anymore

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/06/2017 oh lord. is it the big reveal? !!!! wait wait! what if Jack started an argument with him and took off, then went to go find Gabe. Rather than let Jack bait him into another fight, Gabe goes along with it and gives Jack what he wants, but pulls out his Reaper-y tentacle powers while they're in the middle of things in the hopes that Jack will be too overwhelmed and needy to run straightaway.

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 :OOO!!! risque

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/06/2017 As soon as Jack realizes what's going on, he roars at Gabe to stop, and of course Gabe does. He lets Jack rail at him for a moment until Jack's anger turns inward, and he bitterly says that he should have noticed, should have picked up on all the little hints. He covers his eyes with his arm and mutters that Gabe smelled like him, but he hadn't wanted to think.... He asks 'Why?' and his voice is a broken croak. Was it all a ruse? Has he been tricked? To what end? Gabe learned he was Strike Commander, but nothing's come of that information, so WHY?? He jumps when Gabe reaches out to stroke his cheek.

'Nothing I've done with you has been false,' Gabe says.

Jack groans. He hasn't moved from beneath Gabe, but he can't be comfortable, and he's still hard.

'Do you want me to continue?' Gabe asks. When Jack only nods, grimacing, he holds back. 'Say it clearly for me.'

'Just fuck me for God's sake!'

Gabe is gentle. So very, very gentle, but aside from that, he gives Jack everything he asks for, everything he demands in his breathless cries.

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 kjfnakdfjakjnfkjsdnfadf b o ys afterwards, jack just watches gabe for awhile. it's searching, a little on the intense side. gabriel finally asks what jack's doing, and jack shrugs, looks away self-consciously. "was just wondering," he says. his voice is thick. he clears his throat and continues, "if you'd been in sep with me. just wondering what our lives would be like."

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/06/2017 fffffffffffff

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 LITTLE!!! DOES HE KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/06/2017 Gabe, reaching out to take his hand and kiss his knuckles: I'd've had more time to make you happy.

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 MELTING GABRIEL MARRY ME jack manages to not recoil and is a little taken aback by the warmth in his chest

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/06/2017 he's bothered to think that he might be starting to want that. particularly since he doesn't think it's going to last, or that it might not even be real. he gathers his things and leaves, needing to think. To his slight surprise, Reaper and Gabe--he still can't quite think of them as the same person--give him his space. He sees Reaper during fights, but Reaper never approaches him, actually takes out an enemy or two that had been aiming for Jack. He avoids the park where he met Gabe, but when he passes by the safe house--not planning to go in, it was just where he ended up wandering--there are flowers left on the doorstep.

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 CLUTCHES CHEST after so many years of being gutted by governments and media and every organization under the sun, is it really okay for him to give gabriel a hollowed out shell?

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/06/2017 ; ; so when he's ready--and he doesn't feel ready, but he misses the way Gabriel touched him and spoke to him and, damn it all, just the way Gabriel looked at him--he goes back to where it started--the park bench. He waits. It takes a while, of course. He's been avoiding Gabe for days, but eventually, Gabe comes strolling down the path. He manages to not show surprise at the sight of Jack there, but maybe in the way he sighs quietly when he sits down, the way his shoulders lots their tension, the way he leans forward, elbows braced on his knees...maybe somewhere in all of that Jack can believe that Gabriel is relieved to see him.

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 QOQ there are so many things jack wants to say, so many caveats about how he's got nothing left to offer gabe but he wants to try anyway, about how he doesn't know what he's doing (and if he's being honest, he's scared) but he's starting to think maybe that's okay, about how he has so many regrets but if this was the path he had to take to find gabe then it's all been worth it, and a million other self-deprecating and grateful things. but it's too much all at once. maybe he'll get around to them one at a time later. for now he just manages a quiet "sorry," and then "i want to try. if... if you still want to."

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/06/2017 'Even though I'm the Reaper?' It's only barely a question. Jack hesitates, then nods. 'Haven't quite forgiven you for hiding that. You've known about me for a while. Can't promise I won't try to take a little revenge next time we meet on opposing sides.' He's more relieved than he'll ever admit when Gabe chuckles at that. 'Fair enough.'

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 YAYYY HAPPY ENDING although gabe still works for talon awks

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/06/2017 lol they'll work it out. or kill each other. either way.

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 the real jack morrison would never pass up a chance to die

SuspiciousPopsicle - 08/06/2017 lol Gabe will give him many small deaths

firesonic152 - 08/06/2017 >||3c

#cornfuck and the reaper #R76 plot ideas #contains both tentacles and some feelsy garbage

[stress-bob]

HERE WE GO

Ok. Worked out, cleaned my room, paid credit card payment, paid rent, posted my probably-wont-make-progress-but-maybe progress picture, and smoked a bowl. My body is ready.

So I was talking about what happened around the time Dea and I broke up recently with a friend, and made me think that it’s been awhile since i’ve sorted through it. Figured why not put as much as I can remember down ~a year and a half later.

Buckle up buttercup,This gonna be looooooooong.

My order of things might be a little muddled, there was a lot going on at the same time.

So let’s back up to before we actually broke up!

For about a year prior I was getting real stressed out about my job. I was in a customer service position working for her Dad actually. He owned a Diesel shop, and had a Company owner in Italy who he was buddies with. Marco (italy guy), asked him to set up a place in the US to service his customer base.

I was going to college at the time, and decided I didn’t want to pass up a really interesting opportunity. I’m mostly glad I did. Anyway, I dropped out to work full time here and ended up making some good money. Most of what I did was answer phone calls and help people solve issues (99.9% of the time they caused) . At some point we started going to trade shows, and that was super super fun. I would fly out, set up a pop up tent and the whole shebang.

I was also sent to Mexico two different times for something similar. Except this one, it was with our distributor who was huge. They took their top 100 dealers on a “land cruise” (used to be an actual one, but they do resorts now), and about 25 manufacturers would pay ~20k to fund and attend this. During 3 of the 6 days, the 100 dealers would be set up at tables or 5. Basically think of speed dating. We’d each go around and give a 30 minute pitch about our product to these guys, answer questions, etc. I believe it was 4-5 hours each of the 3 days. You’d think an introvert like me would have a hard time with that, but it was actually a BLAST.

So what was the issue with the job?

Two big things. Dea’s dad (Rip), and a co worker of mine. I worked with a buddy of mine Adam, and he was fantastic. But we had this other co worker who was an old hick from Idaho (buddy of Rip’s) who was to handle our forum and some online stuff. For most of the time I worked with him it was fine. At some point he got really nasty. We had our own forum going on, and a buddy of his helped set it up for us. There were a lot of stupid things that happened surrounding that.

So eventually he’s outright hurling insults at me basically daily on the private side of this form (for a WHILE), and Rip wouldn’t do shit about it. On top of that, Rip had his own shitshow of a shop to run on top of it, and he’s old and tired. But he wouldn’t really give us the autonomy we needed so we could prioritize and get things done with what we had. We can’t be expected to try to learn fucking SEO while answering calls, updating the website, doing sales etc etc infinity fucking etc. Too much do be done with two people, and it was all expected to be done.

Eventually I was donezos, sent him a longwinded 2000 word email about exactly what I had problems with and why i was leaving (prob still have it).

So during the culmination of my work bullshit, that’s when Dea and I’s problems are starting to come to a crossroad. To be completely fair with myself, this was a long time coming. Tbh not sure exactly how long, but it probably should have been over before this went down.

We’ve always had communication problems. I think fundamentally we just don’t understand each-other well. Sure we both could have pointed out a lot of habits and what each would have done in certain situations, things we liked. But that’s not really the type of understanding i’m talking about.

The first time I realized something might happen is when she asked me about how I felt about polyamory. It’s something I had thought about before, because other women are definitely attractive. But with how long we’d been together, I knew it would bring up a lot of really jealous feelings that wouldn’t be pretty. So when she asked, I answered pretty matter-of-factly that it wasn’t going to work for me.

Looking back she was watching a lot of shows about poly life around this time, fun tidbit.

I wouldn’t say this answer upset her necessarily....but she was clearly idk, put off? Maybe disappointed.

IIRC she eventually asked again, and my answer remained the same. I think this was what spurred the discussion of “I don’t know if this what I want”. I did know what I wanted. She didn’t. What else can I do but wait until she does figure it out? I’m not that type of person that’s going to try and influence her. I could have tried to convince her she would be happy if she stayed or some bullshit. I loved her, and if not being with me is the way it needs to be? Them’s the breaks. I was also so SO tired emotionally. I had nothing left to give at that point.

So she breaks up with me. I think I left to walk to 7-11 at this point, because I needed a break. I don’t actually remember that well. I wasn’t around her right then, regardless. Maybe we were in our room when we broke up. Anyway Not that long after she breaks up with me(5 mins, half hour?), she’s crying and didn’t want to break up.

And of course I didn’t either. That lasted about a month, and she does it for real. Now here’s where the fun stuff started!

Sometime before or shortly after this I found out my Mom has an autoimmune disease that will kill her sooner or later. It’s very possible this is what her contributed to her mom dying when I was 8. So scary stuff yeah?

I quit my job, because FUCK that noise. It was too much.

I stayed living in the same house, but different room. Big mistake. I trusted her ability to communicate too much. Not that mine was stellar (we’ll get into this).

My parents divorce. Which hey, go be happy Mom! Again, sorry Dad, them’s the breaks. Happened to me to not even a month prior. But no, they both decided to be giant shitters. I think my Mom definitely did worse things to him, and to the family. He definitely said some nasty shit too though.

My mom decides to encourage my dad to go visit some family in Ohio (maybe he was thinking about it already? he reconnected with them recently at this point). By the time he comes back, she has a “friend” staying in the house. I feel like she said he was just staying for a while. Well my dad aint dumb, and this is the guy that has been in love with my mom forever, apparently.

She lied to the family a bunch, introduced my sisters kid to Frank even though she SPECIFICALLY told her not to. Her fucking kid’s grandparents split up. Shes like 7 for fucks sake. My sister was LIVID. Like didn’t let my mom see her granddaughter for many months livid. It’s hard to get that trust back. On top of lying to my sister plenty etc etc.  I don’t even want to get into frank right now.

I also had about 9 grand saved up at this point, and decided to not work for awhile and take care of my mental state. I literally could not work anymore after the breakup, and my parents bullshit. Another side note, but a root canal decided to cost me $1500 out of pocket a few months in. Probably like $2k total with the other stuff. Great timing, life. I think I was doing a “staycation” for like, 8 months? ish?

So here I was, jobless (had $$ tho tbf), freshly broken up with, super fucking depressed, stuck in the middle of my parents bullshit when i don’t even have enough for myself (and i’m a grown ass fucking adult too)[[, and just generally lost. Really really lost.

I just remembered. Something that made me pretty angry at the time (guess what leads to resentment?). Very shortly after we broke up, Jordan (the good friend he is), decides to try and set up a guys night for me at john’s house (jordan lived with karis at this point). Of course the bros say “hell yeah!” as they are wonderful. We invite Dex too, because why not?

The time rolls around, Jordan can’t go. Dex does show up at some point. Here’s what happened: Dea was really hurt because people were all getting together to make me feel better, i guess? I don’t remember the wording but....i think she felt like nobody was being her friend in that moment I guess? It was her home alone. And for context we got together every saturday for years pretty much, so I do kinda get it. She was also actually pretty mad at Dex because he showed up. She didn’t invite ANYBODY to do anything. So Jordan had to stay with Karis to comfort her, basically.

Like dude. YOU broke up with me. I get it was also really hard for you too, but put the shoe on the other foot for a goddamned second and consider how I felt in all this. Also consider I didn’t set any of this up. Also consider that you didn’t tell anybody that you needed a friend. I did. Don’t get mad at us for this, fuck.

Here’s where the “this-is-why-i-shoulda-moved-out” happens.

Let me say this up front. I expected Dea to bring back dates. This was definitely part of the deal of still living there. I get it. And I did figure she will be comfortable finding someone sooner, given the poly thing.

She brought someone over about 2 months after we broke up, and had mentioned nothing about this.

Now how this played out, was the night before she says “Hey i’m gonna have a friend over tomorrow”. I just say ok. Didn’t really matter because I didn’t have anywhere I could just go on moments notice like that. Coupla days to figure it out woulda been nice, thanks.

Turns out, it’s a dude that been over before. He was Taylors husband (they were poly before they split) who was at our holloween party like half a year before. To top it off, I got to hear the wonderful sounds of them having sex down the hall. Fucking thanks for that. Happened twice too.

You just shut down yeah? Or maybe that’s just me. How am I supposed to feel 2 months after breaking up a 9 year, third of my fucking life relationship, and within 2 months you’re banging a dude while i’m like 2 rooms over AND CAN HEAR YOU. And a dude that’s been over before for the cherry. FUCK man. I still get a little animated about that one.

Those were the big things. A great way to wrap up the whole burrito though? Dex and I were both given 1 months notice to leave from Rip. MY understanding of the local law was that 2 months is required if you’ve been month to month for more than 1 year (6 years...). He didn’t care, or knew I wouldn’t lawyer up. Whatever. The last and final fuck you was the day I went to get the rest of my shit. BEFORE the time on the notice, the locks were changed. Here I am, at 8 in the morning with a U haul we rented, and we can’t get in the house to get my stuff. What. The. Flying. Fuck.

I sure as shit wasn’t going to talk to Dea at ALL at this point, so I called him and he came down. And he sat there the entire time waiting for us and doing bills. Jesus fuck dude. Like, you think i’m gonna murder your daughter or something ffs?

I think I got most of it. I’ve got some stuff with my current living situation, but it’s really peanuts compared to everything else. I‘m also like, idk fairly happy right now too in general so. I’ve grown a lot, and that gives me some comfort.

[goodsnowah-blog]

2 / 22 / 2018

Yeah man I guess Faith and I are better than we have been. Shits not what it used to be but I still love her and that’s all I care about. She doesn’t seem happy when she’s with me but she just denies it. Whatever. Honestly if she dumped me all of a sudden I’d probably just kill myself. Like not to be weird bc it won’t happen but I literally would have nothing left for me to go on For so I wouldn’t see a reason to continue. The only Reason I haven’t yet is because I don’t want to leave her w all the rent payment due every month. Even though I’m barely able to pay that. I smoke a lot of weed and can’t fuckin work rn bc my client made up some bullshit about me not doing me job properly so I’m suspended rn. It blows because I kinda have to pay rent and shit in order to survive. I think I’m gonna bitch out my boss for this though. I’m hoping it all goes smoothly.

Faith just got out the bathroom. Currently playing is : “Heart Don’t Stand A Chance” by Anderson.Paak and it’s a good song. She’s sitting a crossed the living room now. I’m sitting here tying. Acting fucked up so that I’m not required to converse. I just get sad and don’t like talking to people about it.

Idk why I can’t talk about when I get sad tho. It’s a weird concept. I’ll tell anyone anything about me other than my emotions.

I don’t like that I’m like this.

I tried telling my mom about my emotions today. She just yelled at me instead. Seems pretty fuckin typical. Yell at snowah for some shit he may have done (probs not but accepting that my mom isn’t perfect is beyond her capabilities) because that seems like a good idea. Why fuckn not.

I still don’t talk with my sister. She gave Riley, my bulldog, back to my father.

Fuck that bitch.

She stopped being family the day she told me that.

People don’t take me seriously I think.

I always told folks growing up that if they kept wronging me that I’d just cut them out of my life

They keep acting surprised when it happens.

Happens to be family members 9/10 times.

I literally do not like any family members of mine.

Wouldn’t have contact with my mom/stepdad at this point had they not felt bad for fuckn neglecting me all throughout my childhood n bought me a car as a way of saying sorry.

Buying a car is easier than saying sorry

“Hey sorry we deliberately Made you feel like garbage for 5+ years we were too busy loving Molly and Addie”

Signing a check is a lot easier.

I’d probably do the same tbh.

Regardless it’s been a terrible day.

I’m suspended from work after doing my job correctly.

My mom yelled at me for having feelings that she didn’t like

I don’t speak with Addie (we used to be best friends)

I don’t speak with my father because FUCK THAT GUY

I don’t really talk to Gary much. It’s just a bit weird still

Molly is like 14 at this point. She can’t handle adult shit. She’s sooooooooooooooo innocent.

Both the Bros live In group homes.

Idk what family is.

All I hope is that in the future I don’t have one.

I just want to be by myself honestly. Then if I fuckin kill my self nobody will care.

That’s all I want. Just an excuse to do it.

It’s not fun existing. I just want to be done.

I think that’s why I try to sleep so much. It’s as close to death as I can get without doing it.

I’m just tired though.

I’m gonna try to sleep now.