#the result will either be the tastiest thing in the world | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jikjinz · 8 months

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★﹐this is overdose ．﹗﹑

anonymous asked: Can you please do treasure legal line overstimulating their s/o unintentionally kind off something?

cw: treasure legal line x fem!reader (separate); overstimulation (f!receiving), oral sex (f!receiving), squirting kind-of?, fingering, tit play/nipple play, unprotected p-in-v sex (yall better wrap it up), aftercare mentioned; lmk if i missed any

a/n: back on my bullshit to drop a bomb and disappear. this is like a year late request so im sorry in advance but ig better late than never lol. enjoy <3 and btw this is little to no proof-read so yall dont see eventual typos or grammatical mistakes.

CHOI HYUNSUK 💭ˎˊ˗

it happened by accident

but when he noticed, his brain caught an error, a big one

keeps on going either way because you’re so gorgeous this way and he’s unable to stop

no thoughts in your brain right now, as your head is full of fuzzy pleasure and hyunsuk. that’s all you can think of and when you feel his tongue yet again on your clit you’re losing it.

hyunsuk is as well in his world… kind-of?? because his world right now consists of the most scrumptious meal he’s ever had. your pussy. and he loves the background music consisting of your moans, screams, and random blabbers you say occasionally. yet the moment your thighs shake and the most overpowering orgasm hits you while providing him the tastiest thing ever, hyunsuk finally comes back to reality. and as you try to calm yourself by breathing steadily, hyunsuk looks at your with his dreamy gaze, his lower face covered in his spit and your juices.

because you’re the best thing that he got blessed with and he hopes to keep you by his side until you two get old.

💭ˎˊ˗ PARK JIHOON

probably it was his goal

which he achieved

grins like a stupid idiot (which he is) at your fucked up state because it’s him, it’s park jihoon who got you to such point and no. one. else. ego boost 100

“jihoon, please, please, please jihoon-”

“please what, pretty baby?”

“make me cum already, stuff me with your-”

jihoon only chuckles like a jackass, staring back at you with that cute smile of his. you whine again, trying to hump yourself on his hand that’s between your legs. he’s rubbing your clit for some time now, ocassionally picking up on his pace and then harshly stopping. jihoon also is toying with your cute tits and those nice nipples of yours, driving you even more insane, causing you to think only about him, his actions, his hand, his length…

jihoon grabs your chin with his other hand and kisses you hastily, a perfect disguise for his fingers sliding in past your folds, causing you to moan right into the kiss and cumming immediately, too intensively for your senses to bear. jihoon, satisfied with the results, lets you to ride it all out on his fingers. and as you look at him with that half-lidded eyes and soft smile, he’s about to melt.

because you are the only one who makes his heart flutter in such indescribable ways.

KANEMOTO YOSHINORI 💭ˎˊ˗

once he did it, got so addicted to the result immediately

sent himself into the oblivion btw as well

stunned and amazed by the abilities of your hot body; would like to try this again

your body is on autopilot now, chasing that so much wanted pleasant high. mind went on a break, leaving your instinct to continue and all you got in your head right now was yoshi making wonders inside you.

“does it- ah! feel- good?” yoshi asks, his mind slowly ascending as well. the sight of your fucked out mind, your whitening knuckles from gripping the sheets so tightly… it’s all too much for him as well.

“uh- uh-huh!” that’s all he gets in response from you but that’s all he needs. and so yoshi continues, though he can’t do it for too long himself. he’s sure you’ve already milked him dry, yet you’re still going… until he feels something warm on his lower parts. smashed back to reality, yoshi smiles reassuringly, caressing your skin with his hand.

“you did so well, darling. i love you.”

because no matter how many times he’ll say it, it’s never gonna be enough and these words can’t cover the whole amount of his love for you.

💭ˎˊ˗ KIM JUNKYU

gets worried the moment he notices your fucked-out face

tries to check up on you but when you tell him to go on

his insides do flips at the sight of the results of his actions

you’re a moaning mess, eyes rolling back to see your brain, tongue out with no strength to keep it tense.

holy fuck, what is happening to you?

“keep going! don’t- stop!”

and as junkyu hears your trembling words, there’s a sheepish smile on his face. the fact that your head is empty already, only lust and the overwhelming pleasure junkyu provides with his actions is getting to his head, slowly, but it does. he still cannot believe that he does you so good and his confidence grows with each louder scream, each rougher scratch of your nails on his shoulders, and each plea of your to make you cum for the nth time. and as he’s whispering ‘i love you’ over and over into your neck, he really means it.

because no one ever got him so confident in himself as you do.

YOON JAEHYUK 💭ˎˊ˗

is in awe of the view in front of him

will stop if you want but that’s not enough for him

is the type to overstimulate you on purspose because it’s hot when you do it

jaehyuk can’t help but stare with wide open eyes and salivating mouth at your still spasming pussy.

“i’d love to see it more often, baby,” he says with that dumb boyish smile. right now, jaehyuk looks like a little child amazed by a new toy. he’s still staring at your entrance, in awe, trying not to hump himself between your thighs. finally, he looks at your face and gets close, so he can kiss the living shit out of you. you are just too good for him and he would give you the world if you’d ask. and he’ll start with a comforting bath, warm bathrobe, and lots of kisses and cuddles.

because he loves you so much and he knows you love him the same amount. but he still loves you a bit more than that.

💭ˎˊ˗ HAMADA ASAHI

did you so good for so long you squirted for the first time ever

blurted out some stupid bullshit because he loved that so much

will try to make you squirt again in the future (next time you get intimate)

“now that was hot as fuck.”

asahi stares at your soaked pussy and the wet stains on the sheets, in awe of your abilities. and as you squirm, trying to run away from his stare in embarassment, his heart swells inside his guts.

“darling, i love that you did it, it was incredibly hot and i wish to see you do such things more. it made me even more horny right now to be frank.”

you are able to only stare at him for a second, then chuckle at his honest words. as he sees your body slowly relax with each laugh, he smiles as well.

because he loved how you made his heart flutter with your smile and he would do anything to see you smile all the time.

KIM DOYOUNG 💭ˎˊ˗

another idiot who gets an ego boost

but is incredibly lost at what is going on with you

stops the moment you start crying out his name, does not understand the mixed signals of your words and body

“ah-! too- too much-!”

the moment doyoung hears these words, he stops his movements. indeed, he got lost in the pleasure the moment he slid inside, yet it seemed at first you were enjoying it as well. he has no idea what is happening to you but carefully watches your body, your each move, as he slowly tries to understand what do you mean.

“are you- are you okay, princess?”

the concern in his voice brings your senses back a bit and as you notice his worried stare, you try to say something coherent, though your fried brain can’t find right words.

“so good it’s- too much.”

what?

he is still looking at you and he still monitors your reactions but can’t help this cheeky smile. as he proceeds to finally get your words to his head, doyoung can’t help but kiss you.

because he did you so good it’s too much, all of it by accident, which only adds to his confidence.

|| trsr-mlist || main-mlist || reblogs & feedback appreciated !!!

taglist: @mashiluvs @yedamies-blackswan @ahncosette

@ jikjinz / @ ness-iness 2023, do not copy, translate or repost without permission!!!

#choi hyunsuk #fics: treasure #hyunsuk smut #treasure smut #treasure smut headcanons #jihoon smut #doyoung smut #doyoung

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would-this-pokemon-be-a-friend · 4 months

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Would A Delibird Make A Good Pet?

For no particular reason, it’s time to cover delibird! A delibird would indeed make a good pet, though caring for one would come with some interesting quirks.

At nearly three feet tall, delibirds are certainly taller than I assumed, but they’re certainly not too large to fit in most homes. While, due to their resemblance to real-world penguins, one may worry about how well delibirds can handle warmer climates, have no fear: this species prefers cooler climates but is able to withstand the weather of locations as warm as the Alola Region (Sun)! One thing to keep in mind is that a delibird would most likely prefer to rest somewhere up high. Wild delibirds build their nests at the edge of sharp cliffs (Silver), indicating a surprising skill in either flight or climbing.

Delibirds have been known to get along great with humans, which isn’t surprising given their happy-go-lucky attitude and generosity. You see, this pokémon loves to share their food with humans and other pokémon, especially those in need (Diamond/Pearl/Platinum). There’s even tales of a delibird using their food storage to help a famous explorer reach the top of Mount Everest (Ruby/Sapphire)! This is a result of natural instinct: wild delibirds spend a lot of their time gathering food to carry back to their young in their bag-like tails (Silver). Delibirds aren’t picky about their food as they are omnivorous (Ultra Sun), which should make it easier to find the best way to feed them.

Their scavenging behavior won’t be without its difficulties, however. Delibirds are said to always be scrounging for food to share (Moon), so don’t be surprised when anything your delibird can reach that they think is food disappears into the folds of their tail, be it actually edible or not! You must also be prepared to graciously accept gifts that may not be the tastiest to you, like bug pokémon that they find outside (Ultra Sun). Just as you would need to keep your food away from a curious child, dog, or cat, you would need to make sure your delibird doesn’t get their hands on anything dangerous or precious. On the bright side, unless they’ve already eaten your missing item, you’ll always know where they’re hiding it!

Delibirds aren’t very dangerous at all. They can only naturally learn two moves: Present and Drill Peck. Drill Peck might hurt, sure, but given the species’ small beaks it would be far from lethal. Present, on the other hand, depends on what your delibird has managed to get their hands on. In a pinch, wild delibirds defend themselves by lobbing whatever they’re carrying at enemies to fend them off (Crystal). If a pet delibird tried to use Present to attack, what they’d be able to throw is entirely dependent on what they’re able to find. Not to victim-blame, but it’d kinda be on you. Thankfully, delibirds seem to only be violent if attacked (Crystal), so the chances of ending up in this situation are low.

Delibirds are small-ish, kind-hearted, nonviolent pokémon with a quirky lifestyle that may delight or annoy, depending on who you are. Overall, however, I’d wager that they’d make pretty good pets.

#pokémon #pokemon #delibird #pkmn irl #pr-a

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manychocolatefactories · 3 years

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CatCF Milk Chocolate: Part 2, the Wonders of Wonka

WONKA

For this Wonka, I wanted to go much more into the idea of wonders, fantasy, magic. Excentric, talkative, liking jokes and everything imaginative, very kind to children, he wanted his factory to be a world of pure imagination, a fantasy turned real. He is the kind of person that will literally want to "defy gravity".

I imagine this Wonka to basically be a sort of much more goofy and funny Walt Disney. Willy Wonka also hints throughout the story at his really large family scattered everywhere in the world - a family apparently made of other characters from Roald Dahl's stories (for exemple one of his cousin or uncle is the magician from James and the Giant Peach).

FACTORY

I imagine the Factory, from far away, to actually look like more a magical castle than a real factory. Think of Disneyland's iconic castle ; or the castle of the Mad King Ludwig, the Nuschwanstein Castle - but with a bit more chimneys and metal.

# The Candied Orchard. I think for this variation of the room, I will turn this area into more of a greenhouse type of room, but where Wonka works and study how to create hybrid of plants that will produce candies and treats instead of fruits and berries - such as candied apple trees, and other trees producing candied fruits. The Chocolate River is here as an irrigation system - in order to encourage the trees to produce candies, Wonka gives them chocolate instead of water.

This is where both Miranda Grope and Augustus Gloop meet their demises. Miranda, against Wonka's interdictions, decides to jump in the river and swim in it (just like in Dahl's original work), while Augustus actually tries to gulp down all of the river on his own ( this strange bet resulted from Marvin's mockery and insults at the "big cow being able to drink it all up" being interpreted by the Gloop family as a compliment - and the Gloop parents encourage their son to prove that he is the "biggest and the best" by drinking down all of the river). Of course, Augustus falls in the river, just like Miranda. Augustus doesn't know how to swim, and Miranda maliciously tries to drown him - but they get both sucked up by the pipes. Well... Miranda gets taken by the pipe to the candy making room, and Wonka reassures its parents that usually there's a net to catch impurities. As for Augustus, he gets stuck midway through the pipe, and the pipe ends up exploding due to how big the boy is. He falls down into the river once more - but his weight and height causes a huge wave to crash on the shores, splashing the guests with chocolate.

EDIT: To save the boy, the Loompas (and Wonka) decide to use their new invasions - the Barshmalloy! A marshmallow-buoy! Basically it looks like a regular marshmallow but when put in a great amount of liquid it turns into an enormous "buoy" like thing that will help you float (and you can eat if you need food). It was originally an invention Wonka prepared to help people strained at sea or lost in rivers.

But of course, greedy Augustus, despite drowning, hasn't lost his gluttony and seeing the marshmallow eats it. Which has the strange effect of... turning him into a giant, puffy, marshmallow-boy (think the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man from Ghostbusters). He still floats and can be saved, though the Loompas have to take him away because he can't follow the tour in such state.

# Given the disaster of the Candied Orchard, Wonka decides to stop by a much safer room (after everyone cleaned up a bit) - the Halloween Room. Kids notice that we are not Halloween yet, but Wonka brushes it aside - it is always Halloween if we want to, just like it is always Christmas or Easter.

No demise here, only a fun scene - Wonka has the kids trying one of his new product, an Hallowee candy that will temporarily turn the kid into a monster. Like that, no need to buy a fancy costume to scare your neighbours, just pop one of these treats into your mouth! And the "costume" will be perfectly adapted to who you are.

Veruca's flesh rots as she becomes a zombie. Violet skin covers in fur as she grows wolf ears and fangs, becoming a werewolf. Herpes Trout's skin becomes green and he grows tusks and a boar's snout as he becomes an orc. Clarence turn into a skeleton (though as people point out there isn't much difference to his usual self). As for Charlie I actually don't know exactly... I thought of him becoming an elf, growing long pointy ears and gaining a sort of beauty.

It doesn't last long, but it is quite fun.

# The Kitchen. It is where Wonka makes his candies, and it looks like a gigantic, fantastical kitchen. Of couse, this is where Violet Glockenberry meets her demise - when she snatches and chews on the "Three Course Gum Meal". As I said previously, no blueberry inflation in my versions - here the demise is based on the "baked potatoes" of the meal. As she chews, Violet sees brown scabs appearing on her skin. They grow and grow, covering her entire body, trapping her into a thick carapace - at the end, she becomes entirely trapped in a giant potato, with only her face being visible. Unable to move or do anything, she can just shout as she is rolled around and taken to the "Peeling Room" to be peeled.

# The hallways. It may seem strange to see them listed in the places of importance, but it is where Veruca Salt meets her demise. You see, she picked up some trash or junk that was in a bin of the Factory, probably because it looked a lot like a product that is recently advertised a lot on television - and despite Wonka's insistance that it is not said product, but merely something resembling it, she refuses to let go of it. As a result, she is taken away by the squirrels, thinking of her as trash.

Oh yes, because I decided to re-imagine the squirrels as actually the "cleaning squad" of the Factory, roaming the building getting rid of all dirt or trash not thrown into a specific bin. They then take it away to the furnace to be burned...

# The Room of HEALTH. The Room of Homeopathic and Edible Answers to Laments That are (frankly) quite Harsh. A new room Wonka recently created in answer to people complaining about the "unhealtiness" of his candies. As a result, you find in there, stored before selling (because it is a storage room, but presented like a museum and a cave, a mix of the two) products that go from licorice that whitens the teeth or cavity-filling caramels to nougat that cleans your skin of acne. This is where, obviously, Clarence Crump meets his demise.

Hearing about this wonderful chocolate that will make you super-healthy because it contains all the vitamins existing in the world, from A to Z, Clarence stuffs himself with it - not hearing Wonka's warning that it is hyper-concentrated and will make you over-wealthy. Clarence doesn't mind being "over-healthy"... until he becomes obese, chalk-white-skinned and grows bull horns. Well, he isn't really obese - it is actually an excess of vitamins, that happens to look a lot like an excess of fat in the body.

The only way to get rid of an excess of vitamins or an over-healthiness is either to ruin your health, either to do a lot of sports and exercise... and while Clarence absolutely hates doing sports, his parents will never allow him to ruin his health. So... to the gymnasium!

The demise is especially ironic because he ends up looking like a "big fat cow" as Herpes Trout points out - and before, Marvin frequently insulted the other kids for being freakish "cows" (with special mentions for Augustus, the "bloated fat cow" and Violet, "the freaky bodybuilder cow"). Hence why he turns into a fat, black-and-white boy with horns.

# The Television Room. Pretty much identical to the original one. The variation comes on the focus here - the point being rather on the difference between reality and fiction. I'll explain: Herpes Trout wants to get into the television to enter its world of hyper-violence and be "cool" like Rambo and other destructive soldier-like antiheroes. Trouble is, when locked inside, he realizes that war is actually no cool game and no joke, and is left heavily traumatized. (And, just like in the original, he gets pulled out and stretched thin in the Taffy room, making a stark opposite to his bulky and muscular original shape).

OOMPA-LOOMPA

I think in this version they will basically looke like Santa's elves. Little pointy eared lutins. I honestly don't have much more ideas for now Xp

ENDING

Charlie doesn't outright becomes the new Factory owner, but it is a promise Wonka makes to the young kid - since he is the only one able to understand the magic and fantasy of the place, he will take Wonka's place one day, when Wonka decide to "go on a great journey to where man never went" (even though, as Wonka says, he might come back one day, with new ingredients, candies and recipes from these places "man never went"). While waiting for this day, Charlie wins the incredible prize of a lifetime supply of candy as well as material and financial support - plus, he is allowed to visit the Factory any time he likes.

The Gloops returned home, Augustus still a marshmallow-boy. The Loompas and Wonka, despite all their efforts, couldn't find how to return him back to normal since no one had ever swallowed a Barshmalloy before. But the Gloops parent don't mind, because now he is "the biggest and tastiest" of the boys around, so not everything is lost.

However, Augustus hasn't been seen or heard ever since he came back to his natal country... Some say he roasted in the dry hot desert. Others claim he couldn't resist the temptation and ended up devouring himself whole. No one really knows the truth.

Violet Glockenberry, after being "peeled", was left with a very soft and sensitive skin, which prevented her from continuing her rash and violent ways. She was forced to live in a soft, conditioned, safe evironment, with only the sweetest things. Unable to do much, she took her frustration on Wonka's lifetime of candy, and now is an overweight, spoiled woman always shouting and screaming for the best quality and what will not "hurt her skin". She actually ended up growing back a tough, regular skin, but she still plays along the role of the "delicate flower" because she grew used to her being the focus of attention.

Veruca Salt, due to her time in the junk and trash of the Factory, became a new type of guinea pig - one for testing diseases and sicknesses in labs. She accumulated so many molds, parasites and other infections in Wonka's dump that she became immune to all sicknesses, basically a sort of living petri dish where sicknesses grow and diseases spread without her being really affected by it.

Clarence Crump... He left the Factory slim again, but still with his horn bulls - as a result his mother tried to hide it by putting her handbag over his head, but the wind blew it away as they left, leading to a public humiliation. Humiliated, he left the fashion industry, abandonned all fame, and became a farmer on the countryside - raising cows. Because his experience actually left him very close to cows, that he thinks as his "only friends" in this world.

As I mentionned, Herpes Trout was left traumatized by the violence he escaped from in the television, and stretched into a tall and very thin boy. Herpes left his family to join a hippie and peaceful community, now spending in time relaxing, meditating and trying to find his "harmony with nature" in places far away from human activity and human noise. He also refuses to go any new technology ever. Computer, television, radio, don't even speak to him about it.

No one knows what happened to Miranda Grope, since she wasn't seen ever again. Some say she got turned into a batch of Wonka's sweets, and others say that it was good riddance - at least now, she can be sweet to people.

#charlie and the chocolate factory #catcf #milk chocolate #augustus gloop #veruca salt #violet beauregarde #mike teavee #charlie bucket #clarence crump #miranda grope

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fatphrodite · 5 years

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you’re not an advice blog or anything but i just like the vibe you give off so maybe you’ll understand my problem? i’m a fat girl who feels like i’m not “correctly” fat, you know? like, my face is fat and my hands are chubby and our bodies are similar but you’re just a million times more beautiful than i am. do you ever feel that way, or do you know what i mean? my body just naturally IS this way and i don’t know how to feel better about it.

I wish I could respond to asks like this with something obvious and concise that could fit on a bumper sticker, but I feel compelled to touch on the weird messy tangled super tangential psychology which results in these kind of feelings, maybe in an attempt to help people who feel this way also get to the root causes and deconstruct them. I want to be thorough and wholly understood, and candid about my own experience! but i’ll spare mobile users by putting everything under a cut.

i rarely feel the sensation of seeing someone who looks like me, thinking theyre beautiful, while thinking i am not, anymore, and that has a lot to do with rewiring my brain over the years. instead i see someone who looks like me and I think theyre hot then my brain’s response is “if (theyreHot) {me=Hot;}" BEEP BOOP

I do still sometimes feel “incorrectly” fat because...…. im covered in old stretchmarks, my boobs sag, my belly sags, even my arms sag, im riddled with cellulite, my face is chubby and I have a double chin. the feeling of being “incorrectly” fat is absolutely the result of a definite beauty standard even in spaces that have an alternative ideal to our overall society’s beauty standard. we’ve all been poisoned aight, standards are being reinforced everywhere, like even the actual chunky/fat plus size models, who aren't just straight-sized models with padding, don't have double chins. even though youd be hard pressed to find an average person their size without one. popular plus sized Instagram models have the “acceptable” amount of cellulite, do NOT have fat faces, tend to be the “acceptable” hour glass shape naturally and/or get liposuction to be “idealized plus size” in the body and in the face. so how do you accept your body when youre unconsciously consuming constant reinforcement that it has “flaws” and have consumed that reinforcement for decades?

I think the answer is going to vary from person to person, and for me it varies even moment to moment. There are moments where the only way to cease those thoughts is remembering that this vessel DOES NOT EXIST for visual consumption, it DOES EXIST for piloting me thru Disney world + experiencing the tastiest of foods, and as long as I can do that, nothing else matters. which is you know, objectively true, but I also do very much have a strong desire to FEEL pretty, to FEEL acceptable, to FIT IN THE BEAUTY STANDARD, because of so many years of being punched down and made to feel inherently ugly/unacceptable. It’s hard to feel pretty and accepted not only because mainstream society sees your body as inherently ugly, but also you simultaneously feel like youre not even ideal in the realm where youre “supposed” to be ideal (such as fat admiration communities).

So these are the things which continue to help me accept myself, my perceived “flaws”, and feel good about myself --

: focusing on surrounding myself with imagery of beautiful fat people who share the traits that fall outside of the existing plus size beauty standard. I intentionally avoid reblogging too many irl plus sized people with thin faces, super perky rounded fat, smooth hourglass shapes, minimal cellulite, flat tummies, because I don't want to reinforce those toxic ideals for my followers OR my own subconscious. as a side note, I also enjoy makeup and makeup videos and I gravitate towards makeup youtubers with rounder faces and plus sized bodies, like smokey glow and rawbeautykristi, like damn i can be glamorous with a beat face AND have a double chin! it also helps that theyre both entertaining AF to watch and listen to.

: involving myself in an FA/fat positive community. whether that's posting pictures of myself or dating or otherwise engaging with people in the community. as ive said before you should not hinge self esteem on other peoples opinions of you, but when you believe you as a whole or some trait you have is inherently ugly or unacceptable, having verifiable proof to the contrary, in the form of other peoples opinions, can aid in rewiring your brain to think more positively about yourself. I personally can assure everytime *I* see a double chin or chubby hands (among several other specific traits) it makes my heart flutter because of the cuteness. no matter what shape, fat distribution, whatever your vessel exists in, there are hundreds and thousands of people who will genuinely, wholeheartedly remind you how lovely it is, and many more out there who look like you who want to be able to see themselves represented as a figure of beauty (if that at all makes sense). Parts of me that were once difficult to accept or I used to overly-criticize have become either things that no longer even cross my mind or things that are specifically viewed as attractive/positive traits because of community involvement. and on that note, straight up I would never date like, a normie, and by that I mean someone who doesn't love fat bodies. special, positive, loving attention towards the parts you've been conditioned to think are wrong or conditioned to be ashamed of, is healing. I could not be with someone who liked/was attracted to me despite my body.

: therapy. this solution may not apply to you at ALL or you may not realize that it applies to you. it depends on the degree to which you struggle with self image. you might not even know you have something like body dysmorphic disorder (which will cause things like hyperfocus on perceived traits) or you might not realize youre committing self harm (mentally bullying yourself, scrolling through Instagram/social media to torture yourself, starving yourself/overexercise, obsessive mirror checking and self-criticizing, among other behavior). the things ive already said can also aid you in stopping these types of self harm (personal experience: unfollowing/blocking any social media that i used to torture myself, fat positive/FA communities helped me to stop exercising myself to death, wg/eating kinks helped with eating disorders) and i know there are quite a few other people who have healed from doing similar things.

something specific id like to note about my experience with therapy and the concept of self acceptance. a piece of advice given out by a LOT of fat bloggers to aid self confidence is “fake it til you make it” right. and that's also like, a version of a real thing I learned in real therapy. shutting out negative thoughts and replacing them with a contrary, positive mantra until your brain rewires, until you believe it. its a tool you can use in accepting the parts you struggle to accept, and beyond the neutral implication of that, glorifying them. the human brain has an interesting reaction to repetition. the more you repeat something the more you believe it. whether that's something negative or something positive. its a lesson to keep in mind even if therapy isn't something you want or need.

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toho-literature · 4 years

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Curiosities of Lotus Asia - Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Illusionary Bird

Marisa visited Kourindou carrying one of the beautiful crested ibises that had been increasing in number in Gensokyo lately. After catching it near Hakurei Shrine, Marisa was planning to cook it and eat it with Reimu. In the now lively Kourindou, the owner Rinnosuke was immersed in thought about the reason for the increase in the ibises...

Chapter 2 of an original story based on the Touhou series!

Illusionary Bird

“Hey, Kourin! What's up? Today's our routine hot pot day!”

She shouted as she threw open the door. As far as I'm concerned, today's Animal Protection Day.

“Oh, it's you, Marisa? What's the meaning of coming here and claiming this to be a 'hot pot day'?”

Marisa showed me what she had in her right hand, and there it was, a limp, red-and-white lump...

Some way from the Human Village in Gensokyo is the Forest of Magic, and close by this forest is my shop, Kourindou. In other words, it's halfway between where the humans live and where the youkai are. I thought that I could do business with both humans and youkai in this location, but the truth is that I almost never have clients of either kind. Well, it gets lively at times, but...

“Isn't that a crested ibis? What happened?”

“Yeah, I caught it by the shrine. Reimu's preparin' stuff for the hot pot, so she'll be late.”

“And why did you decide to meet at my place? You never even asked.”

“What are you talkin' about? This'll make a great meal! Sure, he looks a bit worse for the wear, but...”

The crested ibis. More and more of these birds have been appearing in Gensokyo every year. Wherever they become roused, the sky would become dyed in their colors. Yet their meat tastes good, despite their shabby appearances. The hot pot too, would end up dyed in that ibis color, almost a scarlet red. Not a nice way to put it, but it'd look like a human hot pot made by a vampire.

“Well, I guess it's fine, but why hot pot, all of a sudden?”

“Isn't it obvious? Cold days are all about hot pots.”

Marisa continued to chatter while barging into the kitchen. "Well, I just found 'im by chance, but he was pretty lively until a while ago."

Gensokyo is, quite literally, a place where illusionary creatures dwell. At some point, the people in the outside world wrote off “illusionary creatures” as nothing more than “fantasy creatures”. But, of course, illusionary creatures and fantasy creatures are very different. A fantasy creature is just another name for a delusion, misinterpretation or misunderstanding. On the other hand, an illusionary creature is one that can only be found in Gensokyo. It goes without saying, then, that both Marisa and I are also illusionary creatures.

However, the reason behind the sudden proliferation of crested ibises is something I don't understand. Could it be that they have become “illusionary birds”? That would be unthinkable in the outside world I knew, but then again, too much time has elapsed since then. As much as I try to imagine the outside world from limited literature and old memories, it would amount to nothing more than imaginations. An imagination plagued by imaginations is no more than a fantasy. For imaginations, I rank them in the order of Fantasy, Delusion, Prediction, the Virtual, and Illusion.

“Sorry for the wait! Marisa is here, too, right?”

“...I wasn't waiting. How could I when you girls showed up so suddenly?”

“Well, of course we came suddenly. But you should be waiting at all times. Isn't this a shop and everything?”

Reimu came just as Marisa said. She was carrying several bags with her. Ingredients for the hot pot, I guess.

“Hey, Reimu! Took ya long enough! Let's get this hot pot cookin'.”

Marisa had her arm outstretched, with a feeling of “C'mon, hand it over!” to it.

“I brought everything, yes.”

“Huh? This is red miso. Who told you to bring red miso?”

“I didn't need to be told. Red miso is the obvious choice for ibis broth!”

“Hey, hey! The hot pot is already red enough, so we should make it with white miso. Putting red miso in red broth? Are ya some kind of Communist?"

“It's not like you aren't going to eat because of the color. Since ibis meat is red to begin with, it shouldn't bother you, right? And why white miso? This isn't the Genpei War.”

The two of them went on about food coloring, but I wasn't listening. Regardless, Marisa was holding the ibis, and every time she gave it a squeeze, the ibis would squawk. It was kind of weird, like the ibis was supporting her. I'm sure Marisa was doing that on purpose.

"Don't red pickles go with tonkotsu? Wouldja put it in miso ramen?"

"And doesn't fukujinzuke go with curry? But knowing you, you'd probably throw it in cream stew.”

“Having somethin' red in the middle of somethin' white is the sign of a Japanese soul!”

“I'm already red and white enough. And what part of you has a Japanese soul, Marisa? Do you even know what 'Wabi-sabi' is?”

“I don't think ya know yerself, Reimu.”

“Of course I don't.”

“Anyway, we're not makin' a hot pot like that.”

“Wasn't it you who came up with the hot pot idea? We can't eat this ibis raw.”

“So is that how it is? Alright then, let's just divide it now.”

“Decide it?”

“Yeah, that'll work, too. Wanna go?”

In the end, it seems like they decided to settle the matter in a shooting duel, without so much as asking for my advice (even though they came to my shop uninvited). The rules were: 1-on-1 with Spellcard Rules. If Reimu won, the hot pot would be done her way; if Marisa won, she'd apparently make her go buy white miso. Never mind that I had white miso in my place, they seemed to be enjoying themselves, so I just let them be. Speaking of which, I actually know the tastiest way to cook a crested ibis...

“Marisa, what do I always tell you?”

“If you're gonna fight, then go outside, right?”

“More importantly, could you divide the bird up for Marisa, Mr. Rinnosuke?”

Their objectives seem to have changed already. Whatever the result is, I guess they'll happily eat it however I cook it. I could go as far as to think they arranged this scenario from the beginning, since it always follows the same pattern. Those two are frequently dueling to decide the most insignificant things. On top of that, they've been using attacks with lots of projectiles. It's extremely bright, and hard on the eyes.

Their duels are always a study in contrast. Against the gung-ho Marisa, Reimu – either on purpose or naturally – fights in a more laid-back style. The duels mostly go Reimu's way, but Marisa doesn't always lose. It's just that Marisa attacks with all her skill and might against Reimu, who looks just like she was made of air; it's like trying to pound a nail into dust. In any way, when looking at Reimu, she gives off a feeling that she is not quite from our own world. Anything more than that is something one cannot quite grasp.

“Hey, that's dangerous! What if it had hit me, Marisa!? Geez...”

“Aw, c'mon! Why didn't it hit?”

“Your bullets swerve to avoid me on their own. How nice of them!”

“They're flyin' straight...”

Since I could hear their voices, I went to see how things were going. Reimu looked like she would practically teleport at times. And her bullets would fly guided in impossible directions. It was kind of unfair.

Well then, this nice, round ibis looks really tasty; I've never seen one like it before. Speaking of which, Marisa said something that bothered me...

“Sorry for the wait, we've just made a decision.”

“Yes, you always make me wait like this. I already made the hot pot. With red miso, as expected.”

“Grrr... You already prepared the hot pot? What would ya do if I had won, Kourin?”

“I would have had you eat an ibis cooked in the tastiest way.”

The Hakurei Shrine is located in the edge of Gensokyo. And by edge, that doesn't mean only in the physical sense. There is the border between the outside world and Gensokyo. Because of that, the Hakurei Shrine is not an entirely “illusionary place”. And Marisa said she caught the ibis by the Shrine. It may be that this ibis is indeed from the outside world. So it would seem that crested ibises are not Illusionary Birds yet. I feel somewhat relieved.

#i wonder if animals that go extinct here appear in gensokyo...#also how does marisa know what communism is #touhou cola #curiosities of lotus asia #touhou #touhou project #project shrine maiden

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jeremystrele · 4 years

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A Day In The Life Of Fred’s Head Chef, Danielle Alvarez

A Day In The Life

by Amelia Barnes

Danielle’s day begins at home. Photo – Alisha Gore for The Design Files.

Every day she has at least 30 minutes of quiet time to herself over coffee. Photo – Alisha Gore for The Design Files.

Breakfast is always changing, but sometimes it’s fried eggs with chilli sauce. Photo – Alisha Gore for The Design Files.

Danielle gets to work at 8.30am or 1pm depending on the day. Photo – Alisha Gore for The Design Files.

The first task is generally a briefing with the chefs to discuss any menu changes for the day, what the staff meal is, and any important announcements. Left: Photo – courtesy of Merivale Group. Right: Photo – Alisha Gore for The Design Files.

Typical afternoon tasks are meetings, prepping food in the kitchen, and sitting down with staff for the family meal. Left: Photo – Alisha Gore for The Design Files. Right: Photo – courtesy of Merivale Group.

Danielle Alvarez has always been interested in cooking, but she never imagined it would become her job, let alone in a restaurant on the other side of the world.

The Florida native initially studied art history, before switching to professional cooking. Her first cooking job was an internship at three Michelin star restaurant, The French Laundry, in the Napa Valley, followed by a stint in San Francisco, where she began defining the type of chef she wanted to be. ‘I was very interested in the small farms and the incredible tasting organic produce that finds its way into so many kitchens in San Francisco,’ she says.

Danielle went on to spend four years at the renowned Chez Panisse in Berkeley, before a holiday to Australia changed everything. ‘It was actually on that first trip that I just had that feeling that I needed to come back here,’ she says. ‘I sent a message to an Aussie friend… Turns out Merivale had reached out to him to ask if he knew of any chefs that would want to come over and lead a project in Paddington they had imagined. It felt like it was destiny knocking.’ Danielle flew back to Australia, interviewed for the job, and the rest is history.

Since opening in 2016 with Danielle as head chef, Fred’s has gone on to become one of Sydney’s most acclaimed modern restaurants.

You will also soon be able to try Danielle’s recipes at home via her upcoming debut cookbook, Always Add Lemon. The acclaimed chef says readers can expect lots of fruits, vegetables, handmade pastas, and pastries in the book, all of which adhere to her philosophy of simple food. ‘Simple doesn’t mean fast in my book, but it’s not complicated,’ she says. ‘They are dishes you can entertain with or make for simple family home meals. It’s the food I (and hopefully you) want to eat. It’s seasonal and it’s nourishing for the heart and soul.’

Find out how this inspiring woman gets it done!

FIRST THING

I wake up between 7 and 8am every day, usually naturally, but I always set an alarm in case. Then I make coffee.

I’m great in the mornings, sometimes I think I should have been a baker! I did work the breakfast shift in California for about a year. The 5am wake ups were pretty tough, but it was so nice to leave work when it was still sunny out. I often went straight to bed but it was nice to feel like I could do something if I wanted to!

Every day I take at least 30 minutes of quiet time completely for myself. Thankfully my partner Dan wakes up later than me so I’m always guaranteed this alone time. I spend this time working out any conflicts I’ve been having either with a person or a dish, and I visualise what I want outcomes to be. I do this entirely in my head while staring out the window drinking coffee.

I am someone that needs this – I cannot recharge and clear my head in the company of others. I need this solitude to work my stuff and my ideas out.

MORNING

For breakfast I change it up. Sometimes it’s fried eggs with chilli sauce, or it’s oat porridge with walnuts and honey. When it’s hot in the summer, I like to make an oat, frozen banana, and peanut butter smoothie which is filling but gives me lots of energy.

I drive to work and start at either 8.30am or 1pm depending on the day. The first task is generally a briefing with the chefs to discuss any menu changes for the day, what the staff meal is, and any important announcements.

After that it could be another meeting with the wider group management team, responding to emails, or getting right into the kitchen because there is a new dish coming on and I need to make it/write a recipe or tweak something that wasn’t right from the night before. No two days are alike in a restaurant and I love that.

LUNCH TIME

Lunch is not a thing for me. If I’m not serving lunch, I’m starting my day right around lunch time, so I’ll usually have breakfast and then the ‘family meal’ with the restaurant’s team at 4pm for dinner. I’ve really been on the chefs about serving nutrient dense foods and not just making pasta for the family meal but it’s tough. Sometimes pasta is just the easiest, tastiest option!

AFTERNOON

Typical afternoon tasks for me are meetings and prepping food in the kitchen. It’s honestly the most frantic time of the day, especially between 4 and 5pm.

I generally feel energised in the afternoon. I only ever start to feel tired around 9 or 10pm.

EVENING

I finish work at either 6pm or 11.30pm depending on the day. To unwind, I have a glass of wine and sit in silence.

LAST THING

Switching off can be tough when I finish work at 11:30pm. Often I’m thinking about the service and things that went wrong, so to quiet my mind, often the best thing is to just go to sleep. Luckily, once I’m tired, I only need to hit the pillow and I’m asleep.

I need at least seven hours sleep to be at my best – anything less and I’m just not myself – but eight plus hours is ideal.

The interiors at Fred’s are as beautiful as the food! Photo – Alisha Gore for The Design Files.

Since opening in 2016, Paddington restaurant Fred’s has consistently commanded rave reviews for its farm-to-table cooking centred around an open kitchen. Photo – courtesy of Merivale Group.

What are some of the main influences on your cooking?

European cooking for sure: French, Italian, Spanish. But after having spent some time in Australia, I find myself using a few more Asian ingredients. I like everything to feel very fresh and of what it is. Often, I don’t do more than use a little lemon, oil or butter and salt on something, but it’s the way you do this which can make all the difference.

How do you manage the stress of leading a busy, acclaimed kitchen?

Stress management is tough. I don’t have it figured out. Sometimes I feel very in control, and other times, it gets the best of me. Things I do know, though, are that to keep a steady head you have to be healthy physically and mentally. This for me means exercise, sleep, hydration, healthy foods, and enough time away from the kitchen to recharge after a big week. I don’t often get all those things right all at once but I’m old enough now to know what I should be doing. I’m getting better with every passing year, I feel.

Right now I’m listening to, watching, and reading…

Reading: Dark Emu by Bruce Pascoe

Watching: Fargo (the TV series) on Netflix

Listening to: Jazz. It’s always jazz or classical at my house when I’m cooking, sometimes Sinatra.

A philosophy I live and work by is…

Be the person you want to meet in the world.

Something I’ve learned the hard way is…

It doesn’t have to be hard. I tend to jump into things without much thought or planning and this always results in a bit of chaos, which I have come to realise I enjoy, but it’s not a good leadership strategy. People around you want to feel like you’re in control and they want to know there is a strategy at play. So, take the time to plan things out and prepare. Things will feel a lot easier if you’ve put the thought and time into planning the details.

Danielle’s upcoming cookbook Always Add Lemon is available to pre-order now!

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topfygad · 4 years

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The Mauritius Hot List: Top Things To Do In Mauritius

From exploring the colourful capital, paddle boarding and cooking traditional food, to sampling the island’s top rums, checking out the natural wonders and relaxing on paradise beaches, there are plenty of amazing things to do in Mauritius!

I’ve just returned from a mock-honeymoon! No, I’m not getting hitched anytime soon, but the trip I went on felt like one of those incredible paradise getaways that are saved for the most special of life events. Mauritius was as dreamy as the photos I’d seen before I went. The sand was soft and white, the sea was clear and turquoise, and the people were warm and welcoming.

View from the lobby at Heritage Le Telfair, Mauritius

Over the course of a week we enjoyed breakfast on the beach, walks at sunset, waterfall hikes, sunset yoga, and very tasty meals – from street food to gourmet delicacies. It turns out there are SOOOOO many things to do in Mauritius.

We split our time between Heritage Le Telfair – a gorgeous 5* luxury resort in the south of the island, and going on adventures. With just a week on the island, here are a few things you absolutely cannot miss!

Breakfast on the beach at Heritage Le Telfair, Mauritius

Things To Do In Mauritius: Get Out On The Water

The best way to get into the island spirit is to venture out in the water, and in Mauritius there are plenty of fun activities to try out (depending on how brave you are!) As there’s a reef protecting a lot of the beaches, you won’t find any big waves until you go a little way from the shore. Along some parts of the reef (particularly in the south where we were based) you’ll find a long row of kite surfers catching some serious height!

Wakeboarding and water skiing are also popular, but my favourite activity was stand up paddle boarding. I find it really relaxing, and with the water lovely and warm, falling in didn’t seem so bad either! At Heritage Le Telfair you could try out plenty of other activities including sailing, kayaking and snorkelling. Plus, on our final day we hopped on board a glass bottom boat and were lucky enough to see plenty of tropical fish and a very cute turtle!

Stand up paddle boarding at Heritage Le Telfair, Mauritius

Turtle spotting from our glass bottom boat tour at Heritage Le Telfair, Mauritius

Things To Do In Mauritius: Visit Port Louis

To really get to know Mauritius, take a trip to its vibrant capital Port Louis. You’ll see the locals picking up their shopping, going to work, kids heading to school, insane amounts of traffic, colourful port areas and more! Compared to the rest of the island, it’s not particularly ‘pretty’ but it is real, and for me, this is all part of the travel experience.

A highlight was exploring the food market on a Saturday morning. It had a real buzz as vendors sold fresh coconuts, limes, Asian vegetables and tea. I loved seeing all the exotic produce on offer, including the famous tea man who had a tea to help every ailment, from heart palpitations to cellulite!

Port Louis, Mauritius

Bicycle in Port Louis, Mauritius

Tea for sale in Port Louis Market, Mauritius

Things To Do In Mauritius: Head Off On A Food Tour

What a surprise – one of my top things to do in Mauritius involves eating! Mauritian cuisine is an incredible melting pot of Indian and Chinese cultures, and some of the tastiest meals are found on the streets. Street food is cheap, delicious and certainly shouldn’t be overlooked. To find out the best places to try, we headed off on a Taste Buddies food tour.

It was a great way to really get to grips not only with the culture and the cuisine, but learn about the people who’ve set up their food stalls in the city. Each had an interesting story and it gave the food more meaning once we knew the stories behind it. It felt like one of the best non-touristy things to do in Mauritius. Over the course of a few hours, tour guide Nic introduced us to farata (Mauritian roti filled with vegetables), coconut water, sugar cane juice, dholl puri (yellow split pea wrap), peanuts, fried vegetable dumplings, and sticky rice with peanut salt. I’d definitely recommend it as a way of exploring Port Louis.

Port Louis, Mauritius

Port Louis Market, Mauritius

Things To Do In Mauritius: Practice Your Swing

I’d never really imagined playing golf on holiday, not unless it was of the crazy golf variety, but when we had a chance to play on one of the top championship golf courses in the world, I decided to give it a swing! I took a golf induction at Heritage Golf Course (soon to be hosting the AfrAsia Open) and learned about technique and posture while hitting a few balls on the driving range. It was surprisingly fun, although I’ve still got a lot to learn.

Golf induction at Heritage Le Telfair, Mauritius

Things To Do In Mauritius: Explore The Waterfalls

Everyone knows Mauritius for its pristine beaches, but it’s got a wild side too! Hike up into the forests and nature reserves and you’ll find rivers, rapids and the odd waterfall too. This one was up in Chamarel, close to the intriguing phenomenon the Seven Coloured Earth. Definitely one of my top things to do in Mauritius!

Enjoying our visit to Chamarel Waterfall, Mauritius

Things To Do In Mauritius: Marvel At The Seven Coloured Earth

Well, what a crazy sight! The Seven Coloured Earth in Chamarel is a natural phenomenon where the colours have evolved with weather conditions and soil composition. As a result the dune-like earth is coloured red, brown, violet, green, blue, purple and yellow. It’s something you HAVE to see if you’re visiting the island.

Seven Coloured Earths, Chamarel, Mauritius

Things To Do In Mauritius: Sample The Island’s Rum

During our time in Mauritius, we spotted fields full of sugar cane. Similar to the Caribbean islands, Mauritius also has a good reputation for its rum production. Tucked away in the mountains on the south side of the island is the Rhumerie de Chamarel – one of the island’s newest distilleries. They make high quality rums, with a mix of flavours, some incorporating the island’s abundant spices. As well as picking up a few bottles, you can tour the distillery and sample some of their collection.

Chamarel Rum

Things To Do In Mauritius: Take A Cooking Class

As a total foodie, I was over the moon to have the chance not only to eat my way around the island, but to cook some traditional dishes too! We donned chefs hats and aprons, and learned from the pros at Heritage Le Telfair. We kicked off by making a tasty palm heart salad served with smoked marlin.

Then, after enjoying so many great curries on the island, I was excited to cook up my own chicken and prawn curry. The spice blend was so tasty, and we added quite a bit of chilli to get it to a really great spice level. For dessert, it was back into the kitchen to fry some bananas with a big splash of island rum. While it was fun to learn some new recipes, it was even more special to listen to what the Mauritian chefs had to tell us about the island’s unique cuisine, their backgrounds and their fave dishes.

Mauritian Cooking Class, Heritage Le Telfair

Smoked marlin and palm heart salad I made at Heritage Le Telfair, Mauritius

Curry I made at my cooking class at Heritage Le Telfair, Mauritius

Things To Do In Mauritius: Relax

…well this is Mauritius after all! Many people visit on holiday and spend half their time at the beach and then rest by the pool, and there’s nothing wrong with that! The beaches are beautiful, with soft white sand, palm trees and tropical waters. With a reef protecting a lot of the beaches, the water is calm, perfect for swimming, snorkelling or just floating around.

Strolling along the beach at Heritage Le Telfair, Mauritius

Pool views at Heritage Le Telfair Mauritius

Thanks to Heritage Resorts for hosting me on this trip. I hope you’ve enjoyed hearing about my top things to do in Mauritius. As always, opinions are my own.

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allenmendezsr · 4 years

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Simon's Simple Hydroponics Plans Giant Ebook

New Post has been published on https://autotraffixpro.app/allenmendezsr/simons-simple-hydroponics-plans-giant-ebook/

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cosmeticnews · 4 years

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10 Best Coconut Oil For Hair Growth And Skin Reviews Majority of the coconut oil products back then sold as edible oils. Today coconut oil has countless options. Beauty and MAKEUP companies use coconut oil as one of the major ingredients in some of the best products coconut oil is healthy, nourishing, it moisturises and highly nutritious. You can use coconut oil as an ingredient for your favourite recipes, use it in baking, or use it as a body care product for your HAIR and SKIN. We will note down the benefits of coconut oil as we proceed. The product comes in different forms. You will find, refined or unrefined coconut oil, organic and non-organic, virgin and extra-virgin. Coconut oil also comes in either a glass jar or a plastic container. Because of the many varieties of coconut oil products in the market, many people have a daunting task deciding on which one to buy for their body care needs. If you do not know what brand of the coconut oil to choose for your body care needs, do not worry because we will help you buy only the best. Our top pick of the best coconut oil has quality products that offer versatility at very affordable prices. All the products are available at Amazon. See also: [su_note note_color="#f7fde5"] 10 Best Essential Oil Diffuser Reviews Best Vitamins & Supplement for Faster Hair Growth Best Oil For Hair Growth Reviews [/su_note] Our Top Picks Of the Best Virgin Coconut Oil Brand #1 Viva Naturals Organic Virgin Coconut Oil [amazon box="B00DS842HS" grid="1"] Made from fresh coconuts grown in the volcanic soils of Philippines, Viva Naturals Coconut Oil has great potency with quality compounds that support skin, hair, and immunity. Every jar of the coconut oil contains the purest form preserves nutrients of unrefined, organic, and cold-pressed oil. This helps to preserve MCTs, and give the skin a silky texture the oil has the pleasant tropical aroma of the coconut. For people watching their weight, the oil has MCTs for weight management; the ingredient helps the body to burn up adipose tissue by increasing the efficiency of the body’s metabolism. With every coconut serving, you feed your body with strong and potent compounds for weight management. Viva Naturals Organic Coconut Oil is also a Natural Fungus Fighter. The coconut oil properties help to fight fungal infections like yeast and candida while at the same time promoting and improving the digestive system and skin texture, tone and health. You can choose to consume the oil in its either liquid form or solid form. It is free from bleach, pesticides, Trans fats and hexanes. #2 Carrington Farms Unrefined, Cold Pressed, Gluten Free, Virgin Coconut Oil [amazon box="B00CPZPYLS" grid="1"] The good thing about purchasing the above product is that with every purchase you make, you give back to the community. The Carrington care program helps to feed kids and they do so from proceeds from their products. Carrington sources its organic products in Philippine and believes that being part of the community, it is only fair to appreciate the community by giving back. With that said, the 54-ounce organic, unrefined, cold pressed, gluten free, virgin coconut oil starts with only the pristine coconuts from the Philippines. The oil is light, has a clean taste and incredibly versatile. You can use the coconut oil to sauté your vegetables, add to smoothies, in baking and it is great nurturing oil for the hair and skin. Its nutrient density is potent with every jar of the oil containing MCTs and other quality nutrients. The oil has unparalleled standards and adheres only to the highest standards and grade testing. Before the oil gets to you, it goes through filtering four times. The coconut oil is free from chemicals like hexane and the packaging is BPA free. You can use the oil for your body and skin and for cooking. #3 Garden of Life Organic Raw Extra Virgin Coconut Oil [amazon box="B06VZ3SRGD" grid="1"] Garden of life organic raw extra virgin coconut oil is one of the healthiest dietary oils in the world. You can use the versatile product for your cooking recipes and for the wellbeing of your body, skin and hair. It has a natural coconut flavor and aroma and an amazing taste. The oil is free from Trans fats and any artificial chemicals. It contains medium fatty acids such as lauric acid. The virgin coconut oil does not go through any hydrogenation, bleaching or refinement during its processing. Raw coconut is shredded and cold pressed then fermented to come up with the great tasting aromatic oil. #4 Island Fresh Superior Organic Coconut Oil [amazon box="B00Y8HZS1W" grid="1"] The above is another coconut oil product that offers quality versatility. You can use the oil for different purposes like weight management, cooking, for your smoothies, soups as a night cream, as a natural sunscreen, as a protective eye cream, for your hair and skin and as a treatment conditioner. The oil supports the body’s metabolism as well as improving the mental focus. For athletes and gym enthusiasts, the oil enhances endurance. If you want your hair to grow, thicken and look healthy, use the coconut oil as a conditioning treatment by applying it to the hair roots. Use this weekly and you will be having smooth, soft and beautiful tresses within a short time. The oil is non-GMO and clinically certified. #5 Nutiva Organic All-Natural Cold Press Extraction Coconut Oil [amazon box="B000GAT6NG" grid="1"] Nutiva’s All-Natural Cold Press Extraction Coconut Oil has a rich nutrient density and it is naturally extracted. The oil is pure, light lasting and has rich oil nutrients containing 63% medium chain triglycerides and 50% lauric acid. It contains no hexane, heat or dangerous and harmful chemicals. The oil is an ideal addition to vegetarian, vegan, raw, whole food, paleo, ketogenic, and gluten-free diets. It is also a great product to use for health and beauty. With its rich natural moisturizing and deep conditioning properties, the oil is a good body care regimen for every part of your body including the hair. USDA certified and non-GMO, all the ingredients are organic from finest and fresh organic virgin coconuts. The packaging of the oil is BPA free. #6 Anjou Unrefined Organic Coconut Oil [amazon box="B016B3EEA6" grid="1"] Packed in an improved bottle, the new Anjou coconut oil is as good as it can get. The 100% organic and natural oil is diet friendly and has many nutritional benefits. The beautiful bottle not only looks good from the outside but the beauty of the oil is immensely nourishing. The oil also offers versatility as it has multiple uses. You can use for your everyday cooking of non-fattening diet recipes, you can use it as an alternative to butter and other vegetable oils and you can use as a beauty and body care regimen for the whole body. It is great for hair as a conditioning treatment, moisturizer and for nourishment. If you are looking for the perfect organic makeup remover, Anjou will give you great services. For even better results, mix your Anjou coconut oil with Anjou essential oils. With this mixture, you can enjoy the most relaxing massages and the tastiest aromatherapy recipes. The cold pressed coconut oil is non-GMO, USDA certified, free of hexane, bleach and Trans fat. #7 Jarrow Formulas Organic Coconut Softgels [amazon box="B003B6VI60" grid="1"] The above extra virgin coconut oil is rich in nutrients and it is a great source of healthy and nutritious MCTs. The 100% cold pressed oil is solvent free and has multiple purposes. You can use the oil for cooking, baking and as a body, skin and hair care product. It does not contain wheat, soybeans, gluten, eggs, dairy products, peanuts or fish. The product does not use any chemical solvents during its production and it contains no artificial dyes or toxic ingredients. Besides MCTs, the oil contains lauric acid and caprylic acid. #8 Artisana Organic Raw Coconut Butter [amazon box="B012Q04O6M" grid="1"] Artisana’s coconut butter is not just oil but flesh of the coconut. It has the full coconut aroma and taste and come with all the benefits you can get from coconut. It melts in the mouth and has no added ingredients besides the rich organic coconut. The main ingredient operas in the product as raw and does not go through the roasting, toasting or baking process. Certified clean, the oil is USDA certified, non-GMO, vegan, gluten free and a KSA Kosher. #9 Simply Goodfats Creamy MCT Vanilla Coconut Swirl [amazon box="B07KQW6BBQ" grid="1"] Simply Goodfats creamy vanilla swirl is a rich non-dairy creamer used mainly in beverages. It contains MCTS that work to improve the brain and the entire body. Made from fresh coconuts, the creamy vanilla goodness also works as weight management product; it burns up excess fat, fires up the brain cells, calms your daily cravings and sparks up the body’s metabolism. It also makes that morning cup of your favorite beverage taste better. You can use the creamer on either hot or cold beverages. The creamer is also great for smoothies, teas and shakes. #10 Snappy Popcorn Coloured Coconut Oil Gallon [amazon box="B07MQV87BD" grid="1"] For popcorn that tastes like movie theatre tasting popcorn, use snappy popping oil. The oil gives your popcorn a great buttery flavor. Coloured with beta-carotene, the coconut butter is a favorite for many movie theatres. The cream is a solid consistency and it saves the agony of having to deal with dripping liquid oil. The coconut combines with flavacol to make the most nutritious tasty popcorn cream you will find. It does not contain any artificial chemicals or flavors. Benefits of coconut oil-Is Coconut Oil Good For Hair? Coconut oil is one of the most versatile products in the world and a product you find in every home. Many people use the oil for various uses. Coconut oil has many benefits that range from health to adding taste and aroma to foods. Below are some of the coconut oil benefits. Medicinal properties Coconut oil contains saturated fats that help to provide the brain and body with energy. The fats also help to raise the levels of HDL cholesterol in the blood. This helps to minuses heart diseases, the fats in the coconut oil known as MCTs go straight to the liver where they turn into ketones and offer fast energy to the whole body. Weight management Coconut oil does not contain unsaturated fats that aid in gaining weight. The saturated fats in coconut oil help to burn extra fat in the body providing you with a weight you can easily manage. The MCTs help to curb unnecessary cravings and still leave you feeling full. The oil reduces your hunger making you eat less which in turn improves the burning of fat from the body. Kills harmful pathogens Coconut oil contains lauric acid which when digested forms monolaurin. Monolaurin and lauric acid combine to kill harmful pathogens like viruses, fungi and bacteria in the body. Some of the best-known bacteria that these substances kill are yeast, candida, staphylococcus and several others Protects the hair, skin and dental health Coconut oil is very versatile and you can enjoy its benefits in other areas besides food smoothies and cakes. Many companies that make quality beauty and hair products use coconut oil as one of their main organic ingredients. Coconut oil moisturizes dry skin making you feel hydrated throughout the day. With a less dry skin, symptoms like eczema are less common. For people with damaged hair, coconut oil reverses the damage to give thicker, healthier, Smoother and softer hair. It also acts as a sunscreen to protect the hair from damage by the suns UV rays. Boosts brain function Coconut oil boosts brain functions especially in patients that have Alzheimer’s disease. People with Alzheimer’s suffer dementia mainly because of the malfunction in their brains. Coconut oil contains ketones, which help to reduce the symptoms and increase the functions of the brain cells. Though the studies are still on going, there is enough evidence in many patients that have gotten better after including coconut oil in their medical regimen. Used as an aphrodisiac Coconut oil adds flavor to the sex life. It smells great, tastes good and has wonderful moisturizing effects. You can use it for massage or many other different ways to liven up things in the bedroom. Helps to build muscles MCTs contained in coconut oil can also help to build body muscles. If you want to keep that body looking fit, try adding some coconut oil to your healthy shakes and smoothies before and after a workout. You will not only add more energy into your system, but you will see the muscles start popping out. The oil enhances stamina and gives you the strength to work out more and for longer periods. Improves digestion The oil helps to improve digestion by aiding the body to absorb calcium, fat-soluble vitamins and magnesium. Take the coconut oil together with omega 3 fatty acids and you will have a great digestion mechanism. Balances hormones Both men and women suffer many problems die to hormone disruption. The disruption can cause problems like skin dryness, breakouts, mood swings, and menopause and period pains among many others. Coconut oil contains lauric acid which helps with maintain the hormonal balance in the body. The fat in the acid is especially good for women going through menopause because it controls the estrogen levels. Great for dental health Toothpaste was not always there and before its invention. People swished oil around their mouths to clean their teeth as well as cleanse the whole mouth. The MCTs contained in coconut oil helps to keep the mouth free from bacteria thus reducing the risk of gum diseases. Even if you use toothpaste daily, some experts recommend that you try coconut oil pulling at least three times a week to keep your mouth healthy always. Keeps the lips soft and moisturized The skin around the lips is thin which makes them dry out fast. To keep the lips well moisturized, use coconut oil regularly, the minerals in the oil will take away the dryness leaving you with supple, soft, kissable and smooth lips. What to know before buying coconut oil Even though all the coconut products have one main ingredient, which is coconut, not all the products in the market are the same or equal. The most important thing to look for when you are buying your product is what is on the label. Checking this out will tell you what kind of coconut oil product you are buying. The things to look for on the label are Organic coconut oil This means that the oil is free from pesticides and intensive farming preciouses. You should make sure that there is a logo certifying the oil as organic. Cold-pressed coconut oil Cold pressed means the processing of the oil is directly carried out from the meat of the coconut at controlled temperatures. This means that the oil has all the nutrients intact. Refined coconut oil This means the oil is made from dried coconut under a process of bleaching and deodorization. Unrefined coconut oil This means he oil is freshly made from mature coconuts and it has not undergone through any processing. The other name for unrefined is virgin coconut oil. Wrapping it up Using coconut oil is both fun and healthy. The oil has many uses and many benefits. Imagine having a product at home that you can use in your recipes, in your cakes, ion your hair, skin, LIPS and even use it as a massage relaxer? With the many benefits, no wonder there are many products in the market. We hope the above top picks will help you in choosing what you want. You can mix the oil with your best makeup products for better results. You can also add it in your best shampoo for healthier, shinier and softer hair. Whatever your choice, you are covered. Best Coconut Oil for Skin and Hair On Amazon: [amazon bestseller="best coconut oil"] Bài viết đã xuất hiện lần đầu tiên tại https://www.cosmeticnews.com/best-coconut-oil/?feed_id=1468&_unique_id=5e599a03325d5 #cosmeticnews #janebrody #haircare #makeup #skincare #skinconcern #beautydevices

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andtheniwrotemarvel · 7 years

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I Couldn’t Leave You

Thor x Reader

Assumed female reader

Word Count:1245

Dedicated to my friend @sweeneytoddler

Your world was falling apart around you. It wasn't a slow breakdown, either. It came as suddenly as an earthquake, and you hoped that it would be over just as quickly. You had always heard, though, that an earthquake might last for 20 seconds, but for those experiencing it, it felt like two years.

To cope, you resulted to reading bad fanfiction about your friends and working yourself half to death. It was easier to hide your emotions while you worked, plus you got a lot of baked goodies out of it. Those helped to drown the sorrows, too.

Everyone was getting a little worried about you as they began to notice the sheer amount of cookies and cupcakes that you were producing. After you quite convincingly told them that everything was fine, all except for one of the Avengers pretty much left your emotional state to yourself, and that was your best friend.

Thor would sit at the counter at the kitchen island, and a conversation might go like this:

"If something is wrong, (Y/N), you know that you are able to tell me," Thor might say.

You would smile and reply, "Thor, I promise, everything's fine. I've just felt like baking a lot, that's all." He would then try to say something about how he felt like you were lying to him, but you would cut him off, saying, "Here, try this cookie dough, real quick, would you?"

He wouldn't be able to refuse that, as if there was one thing that Thor loved, it was cookie dough.

Today, though, today was different.

"(Y/N), I feel like you're trying to fatten us all up and eat us," Thor commented.

"That doesn't sound like a bad idea, now that you mention it," you shrugged rolling out the dough for cinnamon rolls.

"That's called cannibalism, is it not?" he replied, smiling.

"I could probably market you guys as Earth's Tastiest Heroes," you smirked. "I can see it now. The Avengers would be enjoyed as snacks all over the globe."

"(Y/N)!" Thor exclaimed, a little mortified. "That's absolutely horrible!"

"Well, you would be. You'd be all tough. Actually, you guys are all pretty well muscled. You'd all be terrible," you remarked, grimacing. "We can forget the Earth's Tastiest Heroes thing, it's a terrible idea."

Thor stared at you, absolutely disgusted. "Midgardians are so strange," he mumbled.

"It's a joke, bud. I would never actually kill you and sell you for meat," you laughed. You spread melted butter over the dough, then reached for the cinnamon and cinnamon chips.

"Well, I know that," Thor covered, "but that's a terrible thing to joke about."

"Terrible jokes to match the terrible person," you said nonchalantly.

Silence hung in the air like a pirate hanging from the gallows. Thor's mouth hung open in disbelief at how willingly you shamed yourself.

"That...that was a joke, too, Thor."

"You cannot joke about these things!" he snapped. "You are worth so much more than you believe yourself to be."

You shook your head, and rolled up the dough into a spiral. "I don't know what version of me you've tricked yourself into seeing," you replied.

Thor stood up quickly, almost knocking over his barstool. He stomped over to you, and as you whipped around to face him, extremely confused and a little frightened at the angry look on his face, he picked you up.

"Hey! What's the big--woah!" you shrieked as he slung you over his shoulder. "Thor, put me down! Put me down right now!"

He responded by walking briskly into the living room, but that was not fast enough for you.

"My hands are covered in gross stuff that you do not want to get on your shirt, so I suggest that you set me down gently before I decide to wipe my hands off," you threatened.

"It will come out. I do not fear you, (Y/N)," he laughed. He finally set you down on the couch, told you to stay, and got you a wet paper towel to wipe your hands off. He sat down on the couch the way that Tony hated him to, which was to say, with his back resting on one of the arm rests and his crossed under him. You did the same, resting your elbows on your knees.

"What's the point of this?" you asked.

Thor took a deep breath. "You cannot lie to me anymore, (Y/N). Tell me what is wrong."

"Oh my gosh. You're bringing this up again?" you groaned. "Thor, I promise, I'm fine."

"No, you're not!" he insisted. "I wouldn't have to keep asking you if you were fine. I can see it in your eyes."

"Waste of time," you complained. "I'm going to go finish my cinnamon rolls now."

You got up, but Thor pulled you back down. "Talk to me, please. I have the right to know whether or not you've been lying to me."

"Yes, okay! I don't need anyone worrying about me. I can deal with my own problems, Thor. I'm not that self-deprecating little teenager that the Avengers picked up all those years ago," you stated angrily.

"You've grown older, but your habits have not changed," Thor argued. "You were brought here not only because of your extraordinary talent, but because your father was worried about you, as well."

"Hawkeye needs to learn how to mind his own business," you grumbled.

"I thank the gods every day that he didn't," he said honestly. "You're...how did you say that your friend said it? A ray of positive negativity?"

You nodded, a look of confusion on your face. "Where are you going with this?" you asked.

"Have you noticed how much you affect the mood of the compound? You are the youngest of us by many years, but you are the equivalent of the mother of this peculiar family," he expressed.

"Nat and Wanda sure as heck weren't going to do it," you said, rolling your eyes. "Someone had to step up, and I figured that it might as well have been me before Steve tried."

"Yes, Captain Rogers has a rather strong maternal instinct," Thor agreed. "Thankfully, your appearance has seemed to turn it off for now, otherwise I feel that he would have been having this conversation with you a long time ago."

"Is that why you're having this conversation with me, then? To satisfy your maternal instinct?" you teased.

Thor laughed, his loud, booming chuckle filling the whole room. "You may call it that, if you wish, but I like to think of it as my duty as your friend," he claimed.

"Mama Thor," you giggled. "It's almost better than Earth's Tastiest Heroes." The giggle became a cackle. "Come on, Mama Thor, we have cinnamon rolls to finish making." You got up and began to walk back to the kitchen.

"Please, do not insist on calling me that," he groaned, pushing himself up.

"It's sticking. I'm sorry, but if it sticks, there's nothing more that I can do about it," you shrugged.

You felt so much better. You felt as if you had been carrying a ton of rocks, and now, there was still a weight on your shoulders, but it wasn't so heavy. It was as if you had shared it.

You turned back suddenly and wrapped your arms around your friend. "Thank you," you said.

"Do not thank me. I was just fulfilling my duty," he smiled.

#thor #thor x reader #Avengers #avengers oneshot #marvel #marvel oneshot

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brokerplanet10-blog · 5 years

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10 Things All New Cooks Should Know

Ten Things All New Cooks Should Know

Whether you’re just moving out to live by yourself for the first time or you’re simply tired of eating too much fast food and take-out, once you make the decision to start cooking and prepare more food on your own, you’ll be pleasantly surprised to find cooking really isn’t as hard as it seems! While you may not want to leap to tackle a difficult culinary challenge, like macarons, mastering the basics isn’t too tough, and you’ll be amazed to see how delicious something as simple as a bowl of pasta or a plate of roasted veggies can take as long as it’s prepared properly!

Ready to get started in the kitchen? As a new cook, it’s important to do your research and equip yourself with the knowledge and skills you need to succeed. To start, here are ten things all new cooks should know:

Recipes Are Your Friend

It’s fine to experiment in the kitchen once in a while, especially when you know what you’re doing. But if you’re just learning how to cook, you probably shouldn’t stray too far from tried-and-true recipes. Instead, find a few food blogs or search some recipe websites for inspiration and follow along to recreate the dishes that look the tastiest! You can also always ask for recipes in the PhyrraNyx Facebook Group or the Beauty Balm Lounge!

One big important note on recipes: read the entire recipe before you start cooking. One more time for the people in the back. All new cooks should know to read the entire recipe before your start making it. Pay attention to the details. You don’t want to find yourself two hours ahead of dinner faced with a meal that calls for an overnight marinade. This is the most important one out of all the things all new cooks should know!

With baking, I almost always experiment and tweak recipes, rather than make them exactly as instructed, but I’ve been baking since I was about 14. With cooking, I follow recipes pretty closely because I’m not as skilled at it.

Keep Staple Ingredients On Hand

It’s a good idea to limit the number of fresh ingredients you keep around to avoid letting food spoil, but keeping a well-stocked pantry is key to creating great meals without a special trip to the store. Canned goods, and other basic ingredients should always have a place in your home. Since we’re doing the keto lifestyle, I keep fresh salad fixings, vegetables, cheeses, and hormone free meats on hand.

Use Salt

Don’t be afraid to use salt… One of the mistakes many new cooks make is that they fail to properly salt their food, but it’s definitely an important thing that all new cooks should know. When following a recipe, don’t cut down on the amount of salt called for by the creator – unless, of course, you’re watching your sodium intake. It may sound like a lot, but it takes more than you’d think to truly season your dish. And if you’re eyeballing it? Don’t be afraid to add a bit more than you think is necessary, especially when salting water for pasta or rice.

Also, I’ve found that using sea salt adds more flavor for me than some other salts. I use either sea salt or pink himalayan salt to season my foods.

Use Spices

Experiment with a variety of spices. It’s one of the best things all new cooks should know. Embracing an array of spices is one of the easiest ways to enhance your cooking and incorporate flavor and excitement into your home-cooked meals. Explore spices from different areas of the world to give your food an ethnic flair, or come up with new combinations of your own to delight the diners in your home.

If you have a Savory Spice Shop near you, you can find some great spices! We have a Savory shop in St. Pete and I’ve picked up all kinds of cool spice mixes from them! While I normally advocate for shopping online, it’s one of the few stores I like to go into so that I can smell the different spice blends to determine if I will like them.

Mise En Place

Practice mise en place. Mise en place is a French phrase that essentially means “to set in place,” and it’s exactly what it sounds like – the process of preparing your ingredients and finding everything you need before you begin to actually cook your dish. There’s nothing worse than scrambling to chop ingredients and add them in before it’s too late. Ditch the unnecessary stress and put some effort into the setup process. This really ties into reading the entire recipe before you start, as the recipe (if it’s well written) will have everything broken into different steps so you’ll be able to prep properly.

Watch Youtube Videos

You can learn just about anything on anything on Youtube. From how to make a perfect hard-boiled egg to the most useful knife techniques to use in the kitchen, you’ll find tutorials on how to do just about anything cooking-related online. A quick search on Youtube – or in your favorite search engine, for that matter – will likely reveal multiple instructional videos.

Let It Breathe

Let it breathe! This is one of those lessons that all new cooks need to learn. When frying or roasting foods, you probably want your end result to be crispy, right? If so, don’t overcrowd your pans! Cooking pieces of food too closely together will cause you to actually steam your meal, which is essentially the opposite of roasting or frying it. For crispy snacks and sides, leave a little room around each piece to breathe. This applies to everything from small stuff, like french fries, to larger items like chicken drumsticks. It took me a long time to learn this lesson!

Let It Rest

Let it rest! After grilling or roasting meat, don’t slice into it right away. As eager as you may be to dig into your dinner and see how it tastes, you’re doing yourself a disservice if you don’t allow it to sit for 5-10 minutes (or longer, if necessary). The resting process allows the meat to absorb its juices, leaving you with the most flavorful piece possible.

Don’t Over Mix

When baking, don’t over-mix. Pay attention to your recipe. Most will ask you to stir or mix until the ingredients are just incorporated. Stir too much, and you’ll whip up a dessert that’s chewy and dense. Be careful when preparing cakes, batters, biscuits and pie crusts!

Invest in Quality Equipment

Invest in quality equipment. You don’t have to splurge and stock your kitchen with top-of-the-line tools, but you shouldn’t be afraid to spend a few dollars on some important items you’ll use again and again. A good knife set, one cast iron skillet, and a solid stock pot are all small investments that a new cook should make that will make a big difference as you whip up your favorite meals.

As you begin to explore the world of cooking, keeping these tips in mind will help you set yourself up for success in the kitchen. There are lots of tips and tricks to keep in mind and skills to master, but with a little practice, you’ll be comfortable in the kitchen in no time!

What do you think all new cooks should know? Which of these tips sounds the most helpful? Share your tips below!

More Food Features

Source: https://phyrra.net/10-things-all-new-cooks-should-know.html

#read more #see more #check it out #interesting #learn more

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onlinemarketingcourses · 5 years

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How To Create Profitable Advertisements From Scratch

Look – I don’t mean to scare you… honestly, I don’t!

But I need you to know something …

Writing ads is kinda hard.

Well … it’s kinda hard when you don’t know what you’re actually doing.

I don’t know you – but I know one scary statistic that makes my stomach cramp up worse than three cups of coffee before breakfast:

80% Of Small Businesses Die After Their First Year Of Operations

It might be the coffee I’m drinking – but I feel shaky after writing that. 80% of businesses die after 12 months!

Now I know what you’re thinking – “But Andrew! That’s mostly first-time business owners who have no idea what they’re doing.”

You’re right! To a degree …

Many first-time business owners dramatically crash their businesses in spectacular fashion. But many people don’t know why this happens. And because they don’t know why their businesses crashed and burned, their next business will likely do the same.

It’s been proven since the dawn of entrepreneurship why this happens – the lack of distribution. Yet to so many people it’s still a mystery.

Without Distribution, Your Company Will Slowly (Or Quickly) Suffocate

Distribution is the access to your ideal target audience, fanbase, and customer list.

It’s the ability to send a message, get people to interact with it, and either advance the relationship you have with them or move them into a sales system for a product or service.

If you do not have distribution, you have no access to new customers. If you have no access to new customers you will die.

Game over.

Please restart your game and try again.

So why in 2018, where distribution is so easy to obtain, do businesses still flop like fish on the beach when it comes to obtaining distribution?

Businesses Lack Distribution Because They Don’t Know How To Write Compelling Advertisements That Turn Strangers Into Friends And Friends Into Customers

Distribution in 2018 is about relationship and relevancy.

When you’re starting out, your distribution is best achieved by running paid advertisements to a buying audience.

Yes that requires money. Yes it involves risk. Welcome to entrepreneurship.

I want to let you in on an industry secret …

The difference between a successful paid ad and a failed paid ad lies in its ability to grab the attention of a stranger, pull on an emotional heart string that’s tied to a problem they have, and capture their information with a dedicated landing page.

Let me say that again because this is a critical factor between the life and death of a business: Your ability to acquire new customers relies 100% on your ability to grab the attention of a stranger, pull on an emotional heart string that’s tied to a problem they have, and capture their information with a dedicated landing page.

Every successful ad I’ve ever run does all those three things, and every failed ad I’ve managed didn’t do at least one of those well.

As an advertiser, it’s no use to us if someone reads our ad, says to themselves “Wow! What a fantastic ad” and tosses our ad to the side like a batch of burnt cookies. Those three elements prevent that from happening.

We have to make our audience take action!

What Are The Three Ingredients Of A Successful Ad?

Every successful ad I’ve ever seen or ran has three critical elements. These three parts are what TRIGGER the three factors I listed above. Get these right and you’ll be able to grab attention, pull on a heart string tied to a problem, and capture information with a landing page.

To create a successful ad, you need to have:

1- A relevant audience.

2- A winning offer.

3- An optimized landing page to capture their information.

I’m going to expand on those points, but first I want you to watch this short clip from the TV show “Parks And Recreation.” In this clip, Ron Swanson, one of the lead characters, created an advertisement for his company “Very Good Construction.”

Check it out …

youtube

WHEW. Alright.

Well then.

I get that this is a fictional commercial for a fictional company … but the scary thing is that so many actual companies do nearly the exact same thing and wonder why they don’t get results.

Earlier this week a new barber in my town decided to run a Facebook ad targeting people my age. Very well. The problem?

It was a one sentence ad that said: “Come get your haircut.” The image was a man in the distance walking away.

Is that compelling enough to bring in a new customer who has never heard of you?

No.

Look above at my three elements and you’ll see none of them present in the ad.

Compare that to this ad that I ran in the fall for an eCommerce brand I co-owned with a friend.

This ad brought in 376 leads for $166 (44 cents a lead). The video in the ad simply rehashed the ad copy. It’s better than doing a static image because Facebook rewards video ads with more views at cheaper costs. I always advise you make a video of some sort for your ads.

Why did it do so well? Because I incorporated all three of my elements into this advertising campaign.

Let’s explore them together …

Element #1: Target A Relevant Audience

Specificity is everything in paid advertising. You’re reaching specific people with a specific message. The more specific your audience, the higher the likelihood that your ad will succeed.

Why? Because in the past era of mass marketing we were trained to filter out the “noise” in the marketing world and disregard it as spam. We are hit with hundreds of marketing messages everyday. We only pay attention to messages that:

1- Call us out.

2- Are directly targeted and relevant to us.

Notice in my ad how I did this.

I called out the audience TWO times.

1 – “Would you like to learn some tips and tricks that will stop your dog from barking?”

I called out dog owners.

“But Drew! You didn’t say ‘Hey Dog Owners!’”

That’s because I didn’t have to. Notice my words – “will stop YOUR dog from barking”

“Your” is a qualifying word. It attaches identity and ownership to the reader. If you own a dog you logically think to yourself “I own a dog – he must be talking to me.”

If you don’t own a dog you think “I don’t own a dog – he isn’t talking to me. I can ignore him now.”

See how I immediately hook the targeted reader?

2- “Owning Corgis is a lot of fun – but they LOVE to bark.”

I labeled myself as a Corgi owner – and I targeted Corgi owners to see this ad. When a Corgi owner scrolls through their Facebook feed and sees me saying “Owning Corgis is a lot of fun” they think to themselves “Yeah! My Corgi is a lot of fun too.”

Likewise when I say “They LOVE to bark” the reader thinks “Yes my Corgi barks far too much as well.”

This is calling out the audience by identifying something I have in common with them. This is an interest based call out.

These Two Strategies Can Be Used In Almost Every Industry And Niche

Let’s say you promote vegan recipes.

In your ad copy you could say “Looking for the tastiest vegan recipes of 2018?”

“As a vegan myself, I’ve found that these 7 recipes give me more energy, stamina, and endurance than any other meal I’ve tried.”

If you’re actively involved in what the audience is interested in, you can use both strategies to hone in (with copy) on your ideal target audience. This will help you get more leads, customers, and orders while reducing your ad costs.

Element #2: Present Your Audience With A Winning Offer

The offer is the REASON that your ad exists. It’s the thing you’re going to give to your audience in exchange for their contact information. Research needs to go into your offer in order to determine what you should promote (unless you’re a local business with a product or simple service). In the case of the local business, you can run a front-end offer like a $21 initial chiropractic exam or first month of gym membership for $10. Those types of deals work well.

My offer in this ad was a simple PDF cheatsheet called “7 Simple Steps To Stop Excessive Dog Barking.”

Why would I call it that, and why would I present it to my audience?

In his book “Ca$hvertising: How To Use More Than 100 Secrets Of Ad-Agency Psychology To Make Big Money Selling Anything To Anyone” Drew Eric Whitman says that …

“Human beings are biologically programmed with the following eight desires:

1- Survival, enjoyment of life, life extension.

2- Enjoyment of food and beverages.

3- Freedom from fear, pain, and danger.

4- Sexual companionship.

5- Comfortable living conditions.

6- To be superior, winning, keeping up with the Joneses.

7- Care and protection of loved ones.

8- Social approval.”

Whitman calls these desires “The Life-Force 8.” These eight desires drive every buying decision we have ever made to some extent. They are the foundational blueprint for how to influence a human being.

When We Run Ads We MUST Use At Least One Of Those Eight Desires. If We Don’t, We Might As Well Give Up And Throw Our Money Into A Fire.

I knew that my offer had to be directly tied to the enjoyment of life (#1) and comfortable living conditions (#5). Those are the two biggest desires created by owning dogs.

All I needed to do was to figure out what specifically triggered those two desires.

After my research one glaring issue stood out to me – many dog owners had extremely loud, obnoxious dogs that bark all hours of the night!

Aha!

Because I did the research, I was able to create a PDF that promised to solve that issue. As we now know, the offer worked.

How Can You Create A Winning Offer?

Study the eight desires listed above. I highly suggest buying Whitman’s book in order to get a deeper understanding of the eight desires.

Take the time to analyze your audience. Where are their unmet desires? What can you create, offer, or do that will satisfy that desire? Your ability to implement the solution in the form of your offer will directly impact how engaging and relevant your ad is.

Element #3 – Create An Optimized Landing Page That Captures Information And Turns Readers Into Leads

Your landing page has one role – to capture information!

That’s it.

I see so many people trying to build complex, confusing landing pages.

I get it – you’re fancy.

But you’re probably losing a lot of money.

Why? Because people will not jump through too many hoops to get what they want. At least not without a lot of nudging.

Landing pages are not website home pages! They have a very simple, basic purpose.

Look at my landing page for the campaign we’ve been studying…

It’s simple, clean, and got the job done.

On Mobile, every single element is above the fold. I found that this increased the conversion rate (the percentage of people that signed up) by 24%.

I included the headline up top with a consistent message, showed them the front page of the PDF, gave a short description, and placed the button where they can signup.

The popup simply asked for a name and email address.

That’s all there was too it!

The Elements Of A Successful Landing Page (For Cold Audiences And Ads)

When you’re building a landing page for an ad, follow these principles:

1- Keep everything above the fold on mobile. The entire page should be visible without scrolling down.

2- Keep a headline consistent with the ad itself. The goal is to make visitors feel like they clicked in the right place.

3- Include a relevant image. Don’t use video. Use video in your ad and images in the landing page.

4- Keep the opt-in incredibly simple. For my landing page it was a button that gave a popup. All we asked for was name and email.

5- SIMPLICITY SELLS! I don’t care if it’s ugly. It needs to convert. Sometimes really ugly landing pages convert the best. Surprise!

Honestly out of all three of these elements I’ve talked about, landing pages are the easiest. All the work of research and audience development has been done. Essentially rehash the ad copy, keep colors and branding consistent, and keep the opt-in short and sweet. That’s what you need to work about. The ad will do all the heavy lifitng. The landing page collects the information from your leads and sifts out the bad visitors from the good. It’s like your own personal gatekeeper!

Look – Writing Profitable Ads Is A Science (And An Art … I guess)

There’s a very formulaic way to present your ads, as I’ve talked about here, to keep them winning.

Generally, if you hit the three points I’ve talked about your ad will do well. It’s science, folks. Hard. Cold. Science.

But sometimes even science royally screws things up and sends you running for help.

There are two things you need to do when this happens:

1- Go back to the drawing board and see if you can salvage what went wrong. Sometimes this is as simple as rewriting your ad copy. No kidding! The first time I ran the ad I showed you, the copy was completely different. I got 2 leads for $5 each. Yuck. I rewrote it, simplified it, and BOOM leads galore.

2- Talk with a professional who has been doing this thing for a while. Look – you’ve probably got some mental blocks you’re stuck up on. It’s okay. We all do. Despite being out biggest critics, we don’t see what’s holding us back. Every single one of us has “blind spots” that prevent us from reaching our potential.

So here’s what we’re going to do … I want you to go over to MeetWithAndrew.com right now and sign up for a free 15-minute consultation. I want you to give me your name and email address (how dare I try to collect your information!!! Right?)

… In all seriousness, if you actually thought that please don’t sign up because I don’t want to talk with you. I’m not trying to be mean, just honest.

If this is you, I found one of your problems – you have a mindset that’s holding you back. If you got upset when I asked for your information, you’re hung up on accepting that it’s okay to promote to someone if it will genuinely help them. Please read Alex Becker’s book “10 Pillars Of Wealth: Mind-Sets Of The Worlds Richest People.” It will help you get a mindset that’s geared for success. If you don’t have that, I can’t actually help you.

I love you. Please don’t take what I said the wrong way. I just want to be honest and help you see your weakness (I had that same one for the longest time. Thanks Alex!)

If you’re looking for someone to help you run ads and create the types of marketing systems you saw in the article, come check out some testimonials and case studies I’ve got. I even have the one I covered in here. Oh, and click the big shiny button at the bottom of that page. It’s a good button to click. You’ll have a great time. I promise.

It’s been fun everyone.

Let’s talk soon?

– Andrew

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damagemirror94-blog · 5 years

Text

10 Things All New Cooks Should Know

Ten Things All New Cooks Should Know

Recipes Are Your Friend

Keep Staple Ingredients On Hand

Use Salt

Also, I’ve found that using sea salt adds more flavor for me than some other salts. I use either sea salt or pink himalayan salt to season my foods.

Use Spices

Mise En Place

Watch Youtube Videos

Let It Breathe

Let It Rest

Don’t Over Mix

Invest in Quality Equipment

What do you think all new cooks should know? Which of these tips sounds the most helpful? Share your tips below!

More Food Features

Source: https://phyrra.net/10-things-all-new-cooks-should-know.html

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encephalonfatigue · 6 years

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advent and food as resistance

The second of a series of Advent posts, leading through Christmas and into Epiphany.

My parents are from Singapore, where non-violent drug crimes can still earn you a death sentence. That includes possessing more than 500 grams of cannabis. According to a table compiled by Amnesty International, the large majority of state-sanctioned executions in Singapore from 1994 to 2002 were for drug-related crimes. It’s unsurprising then that my mom was always deeply preoccupied with ensuring I never touched ‘drugs’, or cigarettes and alcohol for that matter. She used to say: “Remember that your body is a ‘temple of the Lord’.” And I recall rolling my eyes and smiling.

In telling this story to a United Church minister a while ago, I was encouraged by him to revisit the potential power of this language. And since then, I have been thinking a lot about the implications of such language. How can practicing to speak in such a way foster collective resistance against an empire that treats marginalized bodies like anything but ‘temples of God’s Spirit’, whether it’s governments intentionally destroying bodies which they did not create or MNCs who destroy bodies in the name of their bottom lines.

My mom has more recently been cautioned by her doctor about her cholesterol levels. In the few minutes she spends with the doctor, she is provided with some recommendations for dietary change and physical activity, then sent on her way. For the other 400,000 or so minutes of her waking existence throughout the year, she is provided with a host of other very different recommendations from a constellation of very different forces, who have a ‘fiduciary responsibility’ to their stockholders to maximize profits as best they can.

According to the NYU food academic Marion Nestle, one of the primary forces behind the sharp increase in dietary-related medical conditions (like heart disease and diabetes) in the past few decades has been American agricultural policy, particularly in the Reagan era of the 1980s, where targeted subsidies flooded the American market with surplus food calories by incentivizing the overproduction of monocrops like maize. Available calories within a handful of years, rose from around 3200 calories per capita to 4000. That’s double what anyone really needs. With a market saturated in calories, competition was fierce, and marketing departments were under the gun to woo consumers over to their calories, rather than any others. Hence a lot of resources went into convincing people to buy all these excess calories, and to either eat more or waste more.

Marion Nestle showed how health impacts were further exacerbated by the “shareholder value movement” pioneered by Jack Welch at GE, who was shifting investor habits towards a focus on returns on investment (ROI), and the food industry was no exception. Consequently, the food companies with the most resources to manufacture and advertise their food, were not the companies with the healthiest or even tastiest food. They were the companies with the sort of foods that would return investors the largest amount of profit over the next 90 days. And so, the deluge of food marketing and merchandising with a profit-oriented telos has only increasingly colonized our time and attention to consume foods most profitable for corporations, and not the foods most worthy of a temple within which Divinity dwells.

Our evolutionary history has shaped our bodies in such a way that particular sensory information triggers powerful responses, especially when it comes to food. Mark Schatzker in “The Dorito Effect” wrote about how in the past, our bodies were constantly seeking out sugar, salt, and fat to survive, such that we have mechanisms in our body to get as much of those things into us when we have the chance, in case of future scarcity. To compound on top of that, huge amounts of capital are being invested into labs developing flavour technology that trigger receptors in our brain to tell us to keep eating. In speaking of the kokumi receptor, Schatzker writes:

“If you have eaten chicken wings in a restaurant lately, or potato chips, broths, gravies, or any other savory snack, there is a good chance a billion-dollar multinational you’ve never heard of has stimulated your still controversial kokumi receptor.”

In referencing the Yale Food Addiction Scale, Schatzker shows how fruits and vegetables are always low on the addiction scale, because they send signals (sometimes with toxins) to our brain that eventually tell us to stop eating. Yet processed foods laced with flavours synthesized in a lab don’t have those same mechanisms.

Food marketing departments understand the neuroscience of appetite very well, and they seek out ever new ways of triggering certain systems in our body, not for the benefit of the body eating that food, but for the benefit of company shareholders. Schatzker writes:

“Nature endowed us with our most sophisticated bodily system because it performed the body’s most essential task: getting important nutrients. By manipulating our richest and most direct source of pleasure, we have warped our relationship with the fuel our bodies require, food. Evolution may have given us an amazingly complex flavor-sensing apparatus, but it wasn’t made for a world of cheap calories and egregious flavor lies. We have taken a system designed to bring our bodies to a state of nutritional completion and turned it against us.”

Schatzker‘s main thesis is that as we have pushed nature’s growing processes to their limit, and done everything to reduce growing times and increase weight or size. Consequently these fruits, vegetables, and animals are devoid of taste and nutrients, hence the huge investments in flavour technology. So we end up with twelve-day tomatoes and giant baby chickens in our supermarkets, most likely processed and packaged into some shelf-stable food with lab-synthesized substances that trigger us to eat more and more. All for faster economic ‘growth’. What consequences does a food system seeking maximal ROI opportunities for the next 90 days have on human bodies within which Divinity dwells?

The date of Nativity and the ‘twelve days of Christmas’ in the liturgical calendar around the time of Winter Solstice both hint at the vast timescales we are situated within, a cosmic pace radically slower than our impatient quest for economic growth at the expense of human bodies. The discrepancy between the December 25th date of Western Christianity’s Nativity and the January 7th date of Orthodox Christianity’s Nativity alludes to our planet’s axial precession, a 26,000 year cycle in which our planet’s rotational axis wobbles like a slowing top, a full three-hundred sixty degree circle, as the solstice slowly slides backwards through the sidereal year. The discrepancy in dates derives from the shift from the Julian calendar to the Gregorian calendar, when Pope Gregory XIII reached out to astronomers to finally deal with the slow drift of Easter backwards through the month of March, caused by this ‘precession of the equinoxes’. And this axial precession cycle itself is part of a longer Quaternary Glaciation cycle, which Ilya Prigogine described as “a series of glaciations, with an average periodicity of one hundred thousand years.” Prigogine goes onto say,

“The temporal variation of climate is typically a 'complex process'. Again, in the perspective of classical physics, we would be tempted to attribute this complexity to a basic level, involving a large number of variables, which would enter into the determination of temperatures… Recent progress in the study of the behaviour of dynamical systems enable us to determine the number of independent variables linked through differential equations whose solution could generate the observed temporal sequence of temperature. The unexpected outcome of this analysis is that the number of independent variables which determine the climate, is only 4.”

A beautiful example of complexity and chaos theory, where such a beautiful structure across a vast period of time (the Quaternary Period, within which we are situated currently) can be derived from four variables, axial precession among them. What a roundabout way creation unfolds, yet so mysterious and unmistakably beautiful. There’s a fascinating verse I encountered recently in a sermon from Ecclesiastes 7:13:

Consider the work of God; who can make straight what he has made crooked?

In the sermon, the preacher elaborated that God’s actions never unfolded in linear ways, but meandered at its own divine pace. A crooked story from our view. (It also seems like there’s a lot of potential in this verse for queer theological reflection. Advent is a great time for this, especially in communities that uphold Tchaikovsky’s Nutcracker, Handel’s Messiah, or the Authorized (King James) Bible commissioned by King James as milestones of creative genius, since Tchaikovsky (see Roland John Wiley), Handel, and King James were all very likely queer.)

All this to say that, incarnation seems like a very circuitous way for redeeming creation. Would there not be a faster and more direct way of going about this. Yet God’s ways unfold queerly, they do not unfold in a straight and linear fashion. If God is a God recovering from violence, as Walter Brueggemann suggests, then God’s growing patience and eschewing of violence culminates in God’s self being a victim of violence non-violently resisting an empire of violence. I believe that impatience and violence are never very remote from one another. Deleuze and Guattari, in “a thousand plateaus”, make a very useful summary of Paul Virilio’s commentary on speed in this vein:

“It is yet another essential contribution of Paul Virilio to have stressed this weapon-speed complementarity: the weapon invents speed, or the discovery of speed invents the weapon (the projective character of weapons is the result). The war machine releases a vector of speed so specific to it that it needs a special name; it is not only the power of destruction, but "dromocracy" (= nomos).”

Hauerwas, known for his pacifist theology, suggests an atonement that stands in resistance to this sort of violence:

“The difficulty is that following a crucified Lord entails embodying a politic that cannot resort to coercion and violence; it is a politic of persuasion all the way down. A tiring business that is slow and time consuming but then we - that is, Christians - believe that by redeeming time Christ has given us all the time we need to be pursue peace. Christ, through the Holy Spirit, bestows upon his disciples the longsuffering patience necessary to resist any politic whose impatience makes coercion and violence the only and inevitable response to conflict.”

Within Christian spiritual practice, food and body are profoundly intertwined. The heart of Christian sacrament involves bread and wine, which remind Christian communities of divine embodiment and victimhood. Bread and wine are two foods that take a good deal of patience because they are products of a slower timeline of invisible microbial labour. Bread and wine, as slow gustatory miracles, are an antidote to a culture that loves acceleration for acceleration’s sake, especially when it comes to return on investment.

Yet we live in an empire that loves to commodify even the slow-moving corners of life. In an episode of Gastropod, a baker and sourdough librarian named Karl de Smedt spoke of how American bread supposedly reached its ‘nadir’ in the 1960s when its production was reduced into a technical algorithm centering on “commercial baker’s yeast”, a single microbial species efficient at a one task, allowing bread to rise faster than ever before. Traditional bread starters from the past (like those used in sourdough) were always comprised of more diverse communities of microorganisms, yet required significantly longer baking periods. Consequently, these breads almost entirely disappeared from American markets during that decade, as a culture flourished with the pretension that they were too busy doing important things to enjoy real bread. However, at Tassajara, a Zen monastery in California, slow bread was being resurrected and making a comeback. Baking bread slowly was integrated into the spiritual practice of Tassajara’s Zen Buddhist monks. They saw bread as something that was alive. And their bread was alive, full of a diverse community of microbial life. What if corporations treated bodies as well as these monks treated their bread, as things that were alive and requiring patient care? Not merely as objects from which value and money can be extracted.

In a world with a singular fixation on efficiency, we have no time for ‘indulging’ in something as ‘useless’ as ‘diversity’. Just like bread starters were reduced in microbial diversity for faster baking times, in social and political life, diversity in opinion and thought supposedly just leads to endless discussions with no ‘results’. We apparently don’t need bread that tastes like bread, but only bread that looks like bread. We don’t need Jesus in all the complexities he’s presented to us in in the multiplicity of gospel accounts, but we need a singularly cohesive Jesus who looks like the idea of Jesus we already have, domesticated into safe categories that fit neatly with our current worldview. We don’t need the body of Christ to be rich in a diversity of thought and practice, challenging and mutually transforming, but a body of Christ with a singular culture, a body that rises rapidly into a larger and larger singular orthodox consensus lacking in rich and diverse flavours.

Homogeneity is emblematic of empire. There’s plenty of evidence that our planet is in the throes of empire’s logic. According to the FAO, the Earth has in excess of 50,000 types of edible plants, yet merely three of them (rice, maize, and wheat) constitute 60 percent of our planet’s food calories. This is the problem Marion Nestle is pointing to with respect to American agricultural policy. Dostoyevsky was so keenly aware of this as he feverishly dictated his Grand Inquisitor chapter to his wife. I am reminded here of a very memorable monologue spoken by the Grand Inquisitor to Christ (in Ivan’s poem):

“Oh, never, never can they feed themselves without us! No science will give them bread so long as they remain free. In the end they will lay their freedom at our feet, and say to us, ‘Make us your slaves, but feed us.’ They will understand themselves, at last, that freedom and bread enough for all are inconceivable together, for never, never will they be able to share between them! …Nothing is more seductive for man than his freedom of conscience, but nothing is a greater cause of suffering. And behold, instead of giving a firm foundation for setting the conscience of man at rest for ever, Thou didst choose all that is exceptional, vague and enigmatic; …Instead of taking possession of men’s freedom, Thou didst increase it, and burdened the spiritual kingdom of making with its sufferings for ever. Thou didst desire man’s free love, that he should follow Thee freely, enticed and taken captive by Thee… for they could not have been left in greater confusion and suffering than Thou hast caused, laying upon them so many cares and unanswerable problems.”

This false dichotomy between survival and liberation actually shows up in the biblical narrative also. Though never mentioned explicitly in the novel, the earlier part of this quote so strongly parallels with Genesis 47. In this Genesis narrative, Joseph acts as one of Pharaoh’s top policy advisors and civil administrators, and coordinates the centralized amassing of surplus food, and then during the famine managed to exchange this accumulated food with all the money people had, then all their livestock, then all their land, and then finally their very bodies. These new slaves then in the end proclaimed:

“You have saved our lives; may it please my lord, we will be slaves to Pharaoh.” (Genesis 47:25)

All this was a reiteration of Babel. It’s a story of increasingly centralized power and control. Another line from the Grand Inquisitor reads:

“Dost Thou know that the ages will pass, and humanity will proclaim by the lips of their sages that there is no crime, and therefore no sin; there is only hunger? …Where Thy temple stood will rise a new building; the terrible tower of Babel will be built again.”

When the Grand Inquisitor says “there is no crime, and therefore no sin; there is only hunger” he means anything is justified as long as humans have enough to eat. Environmental degradation is justified. Violence, war, and genocide is justified. Patriarchy is justified. Oppression is justified. Totalitarianism is justified. As long as people are fed.

Dismantling Babel is at the heart of Advent and Nativity. That’s why Mary during her visit with Elizabeth (in what is commonly known as the Magnificat) says:

he has scattered the proud in the thoughts of their hearts. He has brought down the powerful from their thrones, and lifted up the lowly; he has filled the hungry with good things, and sent the rich away empty. (Luke 1:51-53)

“Scattering the proud” is a direct reference to Genesis 11, when God scatters the monied real-estate developers of Babel:

“So the Lord scattered them abroad from there over the face of all the earth, and they left off building the city.” (Genesis 11:8)

I believe New Testament writers, schooled in this rhetoric of Jesus by which he must have gotten from his mother Mary, thought of Babel as a story about totalitarian control, because their performative and liturgical counter to Babel was Pentecost. Babel functioned only when everyone spoke the same way (i.e. thought the same way), and fell apart when people started speaking in different ways (i.e. thinking in different ways). They relied on ruthless assimilation and homogenization. The splintering of languages was its downfall, because it relied on centralized control (not too dissimilar from how MNCs function today).

In contrast to Babel, the new emerging communities of the early church saw diversity and distributed power differently. At Pentecost, the splintering of languages was the inauguration of a new community. The arrival of the Holy Spirit meant the yielding of control, where glossolalia flowed freely (that is language unhinged from the ‘rational’ words of empire), and there was an egalitarian distribution of power with people sharing things in common. Diversity was celebrated and despite such a multiplicity in languages, there was still a special commonality in understanding. A unique sort of unity that is only possible by way of diversity.

Residential schools are one of Canada’s most glaring undertakings within the logic of Babel. There was no tolerance for another way of speaking, of knowing, of being. The logic of colonialism is about total control, which for Canada meant violently uprooting an entire generation of indigenous people from their families to ‘civilize’ them, and put an end to the generational links perpetuating their ’savage’ ways. The logic being: if we are going to progress to higher and higher heights as a species, we all need to use the same words, speak the same way, think the same way, and be the same way. Speaking in different ways was what brought Babel toppling down, and it’s also reflected the arrival of the Holy Spirit. Emmanuel, God with us. If we want the peace and justice of God to increase among us, we must very intentionally make space for diverse ways of speaking, thinking, and being.

Wade Davis has been a prominent voice bringing awareness to endangered cultures, remarking that the people of all these endangered cultures:

“teach us that there are other ways of being, other ways of thinking, other ways of orienting yourself with the earth… just as the biosphere is being severely eroded, so too is the ethnosphere – and if anything, at a far greater rate. No biologist, for example, would dare suggest that 50% of all species are moribund or on the brink of extinction because it simply is not true. And yet that, the most apocalyptic scenario in the realm of biological diversity scarcely approaches what we know to be the most optimistic scenario in the realm of cultural diversity. And the great indicator of that, of course, is language loss.”

Davis then begins describing what I can only think of as a re-Babelization of the planet:

“When each of you in this room were born, there were 6,000 languages spoken on the planet. Now a language is not just a body of vocabulary or a set of grammatical rules, a language is a flash of the human spirit, its a vehicle through which the soul of each particular culture comes into the material world. Every language is an old growth forest of the mind, a watershed of thought, an ecosystem of spiritual possibilities. And of those 6,000 languages, as we sit here today in Monterray, fully half are no longer being whispered into the ears of children. They are no longer being taught to babies. Which means, effectively, unless something changes, they’re already dead. What could be more lonely than to be enveloped in silence, to be the last of your people to speak your language, to have no way to pass on the wisdom of the ancestors, or anticipate the promise of the children. And yet, that dreadful fate is indeed the plight of somebody somewhere on earth roughly every two weeks because every two weeks, some elder dies and carries with them into grave the last syllables of an ancient tongue.”

Language, like food, is pervasively woven within the fabric of everyday life. Both are reflective of a communal way of being human, shaped by the unique experiences of various communities. They are both cornerstones of our existence. Yet, food in some sense, is even more profoundly fundamental than language, in the sense that while only humans depend on language (in the way Chomsky defines language, with complex grammatical structures), all animals require food. This animalistic need for food is unsurprisingly a strategic site for empire to maintain, especially empires with an interest in fostering absolute dependence in human bodies. Both food and language however, are embedded within practices of human habit. And transforming habits is the way to sustain resistance against an empire that never stops persisting in its attempts to control human bodies. In Dostoyevsky’s “The Brother’s Karamazov”, the young boy and self-described ‘socialist’ Kolya precociously remarks:

“Everything is habit with men, everything even in their social and political relations. Habit is the great motive-power.”

Habits shape our social and political relations, and there are examples in the biblical narrative of people with a keen awareness of this. In Daniel 1, four young Jewish captives make a bold decision to reject the high couture food and wine of Babylon, and tell the king:

“Please test your servants for ten days. Let us be given vegetables to eat and water to drink. You can then compare our appearance with the appearance of the young men who eat the royal rations, and deal with your servants according to what you observe,” (Daniel 1:12-13)

Walter Brueggemann smartly remarked that these young Jewish boys were effectively turning down the food of empire as a way of maintaining their Jewish identity. Jewish identity is so powerfully maintained because it fosters strong habits of eating in a particular way and speaking in a particular way, which is different from the ways of the surrounding empire. We eat everyday, and the way we eat reinforces certain beliefs in us. Malcolm X, Muhammad Ali, and Muslims like them who lived under American empire, also showed how eating in a particular way was crucial for resisting against the empire around them. What might the food of empire look like today? And for Christians, how is it related to maintaining their baptismal identity in resistance against the empire of capital? Our empire says there’s no such thing as a “free lunch”. But baptismal identity for Paul was deeply linked with leaving the empire of Pharaoh’s slavery and leaning on the water and manna freely gifted out of God’s abundance:

“I do not want you to be unaware, brothers and sisters, that our ancestors were all under the cloud, and all passed through the sea, and all were baptized into Moses in the cloud and in the sea, and all ate the same spiritual food, and all drank the same spiritual drink.” (1 Corinthians 10:1-4)

As I think back to my concern over my mother’s health, I realize that resisting the food of empire is difficult, especially for someone as perpetually exhausted as my mother. I’m no where near as exhausted as she is each day, yet I too find it very difficult, and fail all the time. The exhausted Israelites wandering in the wilderness, after the Exodus, also struggled with leaving the food of empire:

The rabble among them had a strong craving; and the Israelites also wept again, and said, “If only we had meat to eat! We remember the he fish we used to eat in Egypt for nothing, the cucumbers, the melons, the leeks, the onions, and the garlic; but now our strength is dried up, and there is nothing at all but this manna to look at.” (Numbers 11:4-5)

Food is how empire maintains dependence within its subjects and control over their bodies, even as it destroys these bodies (like Moses witnessed in the brutalizing of Israelite bodies, which provoked him to leave his luxurious life in Pharaoh’s court). I care deeply about the food my mom eats because I care deeply about her embodied presence in my life. I have more recently begun reciprocating the language my mom used when I was young. That habit she had of naming my body as a “temple of the Lord.”

My mom would practice the habit of using such speech, because I needed and she needed to be reminded that God dwelt within our bodies, and that had certain implications. My mom had the insight to recognize that this was a better way of naming our bodies than the ones MNC’s offer (a ‘human resource’ or ‘consumer’) or governments (a ‘voter’ or ‘constituent’). Bodies as temples of God’s Spirit implies that these bodies are sacred. These bodies deserve the highest form of care. Care in the form of rest, of peace and protection from violence, of adequate health care and medicine, of a healthy environment, of access to nourishing food, of resources enough for a dignified life worthy of a temple in which the Spirit of God dwells. Every time we practice speaking in such a way we are drawing on Paul's First Epistle to the Corinthians, which reads:

“Do you not know that you are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in you?” (Corinthians 3:16)

So when we are confronted with the habits of speech provided by a sacred text like the Bible, the question people of Christian faith face is: are these habits of speech sufficient for us? Are they more compelling than the habits of speech that the MNC-dominated market economy and the civil religion of bureaucracy or technocracy enculturate within us as we interact with them daily? I have to emphasize that the importance of practicing such speech habits and eating habits is not about ‘controlling’ one’s lifespan. I don’t believe that these ‘healthy’ habits can be reduced to a consequentialist ethic of extending lifespan (my mother’s lifespan or anyone else’s). We cannot with any particular precision control how long we will live. Different things happen that are beyond our control. This is not about taking control of one’s life. That’s the sort of thing people say along side pulling bootstraps and worshiping the mythical gods of radical self-sufficiency. This is our free market economy’s way of avoiding responsibility and externalizing costs. It is the intention of our economy to reduce problems in our life into matters of individual responsibility. But I believe that we’re all in this together. Food and bodies are a matter of social responsibility. This has been a consistent theme in Marion Nestle’s work as a nutrition activist. When we speak of bodies as “temples of God’s Spirit” we cannot do so in a way that blames the victims of our food system, but as a means of empowering communities to resist the ways empire which degrade our bodies, these “temples of the Lord”. Taking ‘control’ is the logic of Babel. Transforming habits in the context of community is the way of resistance.

Recentering our focus on resistance this Advent is important for Christians, because Christ’s embodiment in the flesh serves as an important reminder that valuing the soul is inescapably entangled with valuing the body. Paul writes in Galatians:

“it is Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me” (Galatians 2:20)

When Christians recognize that Christ lives within human bodies, we can better understand what Wendell Berry means when he says:

"What was not foreseen in this simple-minded economics of religion was that it is not possible to devalue the body and value the soul... The prototypical act issuing from this division was to make a person a slave and then instruct him in religion... Contempt for the body is invariably manifested in contempt for other bodies-the bodies of slaves, laborers, women, animals, plants, the earth itself. Relationships with all other creatures become competitive and exploitive rather than collaborative and convivial. The world is seen and dealt with, not as an ecological community, but as a stock exchange..."

How fascinating that the etymology of corporation is derived from the Latin ‘corporare’, meaning ‘combine in one body’. Yet this ‘corporate body’ thrives at the expense of individual human bodies. One of the most atrocious expenses was the Indonesian mass killings of 1965-1966, an incomprehensible horror that unfolded in, what is today, the fourth most populous nation in the world. Between 500,000 to over 1 million people died as documented in Joshua Oppenheimer’s 2012 documentary “The Act of Killing.” The literary dissident Pramoedya Ananta Toer, in writing about these mass killings, said:

“No, it’s not capital I dislike. It’s the arbitrary use of capital power that I abhor… After my internment, new political prisoners informed me that the number of people killed by the military in just a few months already surpassed the entire number of people who had died in the Vietnam War. And these were not men killed on the battlefield, but defenceless people without arms and even the intent to resist. They were killed like rats in a gutter. It was once remarked that Indonesians are “the most gentle people on earth.” The world must therefore have been amazed when these very same people embarked on a rampage of murder of a scale with very few comparisons in the history of man. Traditionally when praying to or trying to appease the “local” gods, people sacrifice buffaloes, chickens, or goats or leave them offerings of flowers. It seems that for the new multinational gods, Indonesia’s satria [warrior caste] had prepared an almost unsurpassable human sacrifice.”

The Christian church is taught to think of itself as the ‘body of Christ’, in reference to a body that was also the victim of violence sanctioned by highly centralized imperial power. In what ways do our acts of deference before corporations impinge upon that allegiance to Christ’s body? Allegiance is an issue, otherwise there would be no such thing as ‘loyalty rewards programs’. Corporations are legally recognized as persons, a privilege God does not even have. These food multinationals, like Pharaoh, are worshipped far more devoutly than the God who liberated slaves from Egypt. Slaves are taught to believe that no other way is possible. Advent teaches us that another way is possible, that it is coming, and that we have an opportunity to participate in its coming. After all, Christians pray, “Thy kindom come, thy will be done, on Earth as it is in Heaven.”

In my next post, I hope to explore further the potential that habits have of sustaining resistance, and what narratives have to do with all of it. I also want to further discuss food a little more, especially within the context of body-shaming. Did you know that in Matthew’s gospel, people shamed Jesus about how much he ate? And also his alcohol consumption.

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topfygad · 4 years

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The Mauritius Hot List: Top Things To Do In Mauritius

View from the lobby at Heritage Le Telfair, Mauritius

Breakfast on the beach at Heritage Le Telfair, Mauritius

Things To Do In Mauritius: Get Out On The Water

Stand up paddle boarding at Heritage Le Telfair, Mauritius

Turtle spotting from our glass bottom boat tour at Heritage Le Telfair, Mauritius

Things To Do In Mauritius: Visit Port Louis

Port Louis, Mauritius

Bicycle in Port Louis, Mauritius

Tea for sale in Port Louis Market, Mauritius

Things To Do In Mauritius: Head Off On A Food Tour

Port Louis, Mauritius

Port Louis Market, Mauritius

Things To Do In Mauritius: Practice Your Swing

Golf induction at Heritage Le Telfair, Mauritius

Things To Do In Mauritius: Explore The Waterfalls

Enjoying our visit to Chamarel Waterfall, Mauritius

Things To Do In Mauritius: Marvel At The Seven Coloured Earth

Seven Coloured Earths, Chamarel, Mauritius

Things To Do In Mauritius: Sample The Island’s Rum

Chamarel Rum

Things To Do In Mauritius: Take A Cooking Class

Mauritian Cooking Class, Heritage Le Telfair

Smoked marlin and palm heart salad I made at Heritage Le Telfair, Mauritius

Curry I made at my cooking class at Heritage Le Telfair, Mauritius

Things To Do In Mauritius: Relax

Strolling along the beach at Heritage Le Telfair, Mauritius

Pool views at Heritage Le Telfair Mauritius

Thanks to Heritage Resorts for hosting me on this trip. I hope you’ve enjoyed hearing about my top things to do in Mauritius. As always, opinions are my own.

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