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yandere-ac · 3 years

Note

Is it despair bear time?

Yandere Human Monokuma X Spy Reader

"Is there a reason you called for me?" Your voice was quiet, almost monotone. Both because you didn’t want to sound rude or snappy to Monokuma but also because you were very tired. It was nighttime, 2 AM precisely, and Monokuma had woken you up and told you to come to his office. He hadn’t given you any chance to ask why or what was happening before he left, so you had to find out for yourself if this was something serious or not. This wasn’t the first time Monokuma had called you to his office, not even the first time he called you to his office at night. The only thing that made you annoyed was that these past few days he’s been waking you up in the middle of the night and telling you to come to him. And most of the time he didn’t even have a valid reason for calling upon you. And it got very tiresome really quick. You barely got any sleep these days and it was effecting you during daytime. You would nod off during the breakfast meetings and find it hard to stand without swaying and closing your eyes. And it was raising everyones suspicions. It peaked when you collapsed and fell asleep mid conversation with Byakuya and Makoto. You woke up later in your dorm, and of course the first person you ran into as you left was Byakuya. He had given you a stern look and scolded you after telling you what had happened. Most of your classmates had amounted it to you having sleep problems but the sharper ones like Byakuya and Kyoko seemed a bit more suspicious of your sudden sleeping problems.

As you walked into the office, which was just a big security room, Monokuma turned his chair to face you. There he was, the tall man had the same gleeful smile that he always had and as his red eyes fell upon you it only got wider. "Reason? Of course I have a reason. But even if I didn’t, it wouldn’t matter. You don’t really have a say in weather to come here or not. Lest you want your little secret to be revealed~" Once Monokuma told you this he let out a teasing giggle while he opened his desk and pulled something out. It was a wine bottle, it wasn’t really a surprise since he pretty much always drank it during the morning announcements. But the fact that he was gonna drink while you two talked told you that this might not be a crisis exactly. After fetching two wine glasses, Monokuma walked back to you and poured you two some wine. By this point you had already pulled out a spare chair, you had been in here so many times that you basically knew where everything was. "So tell me Y/N," Monokuma began as he handed you one of the glasses. "What have your classmates been up to? Any noteworthy news?" He took a sip of his wine after he asked you this. As Junkos spy you had to bring her information about whatever was happening in the school. You were simply a double agent, acting as a classmate when you really weren’t. Unfortunately, you had to give this information to her second in command, Monokuma. Ever since you entered the school he had been a constant nuisance, and it didn’t get any better once he started to call upon you almost every day.

"Not really no. Kyoko has shown everyone alter ego," as you started listing any noteworthy events Monokuma let out a huge sigh. "Yes I know that Y/N. I know they have found alter ego, I can put two and two together. I’m not asking you to tell me about stuff I already know, I want the inside information! What’s happening with everyone! Is there conflict? Are there secrets? Quit boring me to death and get on with it!" He took another sip. "....naturally. Celeste has started taking advantage of Hifumis desperate nature. Kiyotaka has pretty much lost it. He’s started acting like Mondo to cope with his death. And he’s gotten very possessive over Alter ego. Hifumi has been as well. Taka seems to be clinging onto the last part of Chihiro and Hifumi just seems to be in love with him." As you explained the situation to him you noticed that Monokumas eyes narrowed slightly at the end of your sentence.

"What did you just say?" The tone of his voice was cold, dead serious and poisonous. You immediately tensed up as you heard him. "Huh? I said that Hifumi seems to be in love with him-" "Him? Did you just refer to Alter ego, the computer program, as a him?" He put down his glass and rose out of his chair, now towering over your sitting form. "Do you know what that is Y/N? Sentiment. Sentiment for the people you’re supposed to be spying on." He grabbed you by the chin and forced you to look at him. There was pure hatred in his eyes. "Don’t forget the reason why you’re here, the reason why you’re still ALIVE right now." The two of you stayed silent for a couple of seconds before Monokuma let go and sat back down. "Now! Continue!" His whole attitude changed as he gave you yet another wide smile while running his hand through his hair.

You continued with your report, or at least tried to. Even if Monokuma changed his attitude that didn’t erase what had just happened. But luckily, you managed to get through all of the things you wanted to say, all while Monokuma nodded along with a smile. "I think that’s about it...I wanted to ask you something though." You said, letting out a big yawn afterwards. "Sure! Ask away doll face." Ignoring the pet name, you continued. "I wanted to ask if you could stop calling me here for mundane reasons, especially at night. I’m not getting enough sleep and Kyoko and Byakuya are getting suspicious. The last thing I would want is to be discovered because of you." As you told him this, Monokuma let out a laugh. "Puhuhuhu. So you’re tired? Why didn’t you say so Y/N?" He smirked as he stood up and grabbed your hand. He pulled you up and started to walk away, much to your protest. "Monokuma- let g- where the hell are we going?" You asked as you tried to pull away to no avail. "We’re going to bed!" As you heard his answer you had to take a second just to process what he just said. To bed? Surely he didn’t mean...was he taking you to his bed? Did he have a bed? But as he walked out of the control room and into the hallway you realised that he was gonna take you all the way to your room, and that was when you started resisting. "Monokuma no, please. What if someone sees us?! I can go there by myself! Just- let go!" You whispered in a panicked manner, but he didn’t listen. He just kept walking. But he stopped once he heard footsteps approaching. Someone was coming, and they were gonna find you!

You were panicking, begging Monokuma to just let go of you and disappear. But it would seem like he was one step ahead of you as he pulled you in closer to his body, pressing you up against him while grappling your waist, and before you realised what had happened your surroundings had changed completely. You were now in your dorm. You didn’t understand how he could do that, how he could just teleport around the school. But you didn’t care right now. You immediately pushed Monokuma away from you. Not enough to make him fall or anything, just enough to distance yourself from him. "Are you crazy!? Are you out of your mind?! Do you realise what could have happened if someone saw us!?" He didn’t even flinch as you yelled at him. He only walked closer and pushed you into your bed. "Ah shush. Is someone a bit cranky from sleep deprivation?" You growled at him but stopped as soon as he laid down in bed next to you. "What are you doing?" You moved away from him slightly but that didn’t help. "What? Cant I share the bed with my favowite stuwdent?" Monokuma grabbed ahold of you and pulled you close to him. You had tried to pry him off until you felt a huge wave of sudden drowsiness wash over you. Your eyelids started to feel heavy, and you struggled to keep yourself awake. It was strange. You were tired sure but not this tired, it was as if it just came out of nowhere. You felt Monokuma stroke your hair as he cooed to you. "Shh shh. Don’t worry, just go to sleep. Puhuhuhu" you didn’t want to fall asleep now. Not when he was here. But you could no longer force yourself to stay awake. You went out like a candle.

That night, Monokuma laid awake watching you. It wasn��t like he needed sleep anyhow. For the next couple of hours he observed your sleeping body, watching you breathe in and out, watching your chest go up and down as the air entered your lungs. You looked so cute when you slept, he’d seen it multiple times but never while he was in the same room as you. And never this closely. He probably never would have if it wasn’t for the wine you drank. You should have kept your eyes on your glass while he refilled it, silly you. He found you so fascinating, and your apparent annoyance with him only made it better. He knew you would blow your cover soon, blow your cover as the masterminds little spy. After that, it would only be a matter of time before 1 of 3 things happened. First scenario, your classmates find out about your betrayal and start hating you. If a murder occurred all of them would believe it was you who murdered the victim and falsely vote on you. After that he could execute everyone while you had to watch. Oh but you, there was no need for you to be executed since you were a spy and everyone else was dead. Then he would get you all to himself, and he could do whatever he wanted with you. Second scenario, your classmates hates you so much that one of them decides to kill you. Oh how much despair he would feel as he watched your lifeless corpse. How your eyes that once were filled with such hope would be completely empty. The thought of it made him exhilarated. He would hate for you to die, he would mourn you for days, and he would make sure whoever killed you would die in a brutal and horrific way. And finally, third scenario. You ended up being the actual blackened in the case and he could watch as you fell into despair and turn to murder. To see someone who would never hurt a fly give in and murder someone, one of your friends, is there anything better?! And ultimately, if you got caught he’d have to be the one to kill you. To execute you.

Three scenarios in which two of them leads to your death. He wished that you survived, but he would be lying if he said that the thought of you, dead, didn’t fill him with so much pain and despair. And that made him all giddy.

But for now, you were here in his arms. As he pulled you closer and sniffed your hair he felt his stomach fill up with butterflies.

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just-asks-and-beats · 3 years

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Let’s Set Sail

Lycan woke up slowly, stretching as he continue to lay on the soft grass. He sat up and looked over to Gray, who was lying unmoving beneath the tree. A flash of worry shot through him as he realised just how still Gray looked. He crawled over and pocked at him, no response was given. They panicked a little more as they shook Gray, then practically shoved him into the trunk of the tree.

“WAKE UP PLEASE DONT BE DEAD!” he shouted. This finally got a reaction out of the sleepy gray shape, who groaned and looked around in a half-conscious panic. His movements were sluggish, as if all his energy had been drained, but he still found it in him to sit up… He somehow managed to feel even worse than yesterday, maybe because all the adrenaline keeping him going was gone. Hopefully he’d find some spite within him sooner or later to give him a reason to keep moving. Lycan let out a sigh of relief as Gray finally moved and sat up.

“Hey, I know you’re still tired, and I have no idea what time it is, but we should get goin’. No offense but if you looked bad yesterday, then you look horrible today. We really gotta get you to the volcano.” Lycan looked worriedly at Gray, the dark circles beneath his eyes seeming even more pronounced. Gray simply grunted and leaned on the trunk of the tree, taking a while to stand up. Lycan crouched on the ground and signalled for Gray to get on his shoulders, the beach wasn’t very far away, and with the bridge being closed because of some issues Lycan had hardly heard or cared to find out more about, finding Ship was their only option. Gray climbed onto Lycan’s shoulders, slouching a bit, and the two were on their way again.

(this is a kinda long story segment sorry lmao)

The beach was either a lively place, or a desolate one, not much of an in-between. The two could only hope it would be quiet today. As they approached the beach hey heard the hustle and bustle of many other shapes, just their luck. They tried to stay on the sidelines and as nonchalant as possible, with little to no cover out on the open sand. Lycan opened the cloak just a bit, enough so they could see but not be seen. It took a little while of walking and almost bumping into a few shapes, but they eventually saw Ship discussing something with some other sailor.

“Ok, I know you’re, like, exhausted so just let me do the talking, all you gotta do is move your mouth. I’ll try to talk a little slowly so you can try to sync up your movements to the words. Kinda stupid but just do your best.” Lycan instructed. All Gray let out was a small “mhm”, spending all other energy and brainpower on keeping himself upright so he won’t bring Lycan down with him. They walked over to Ship, keeping a little distance so he couldn’t immediately tell the voice was coming from lower than Gray’s face.

“Um, hello. Sorry to bother you but w- I’ve come to request a ride on one of your fine vessels. A short trip, nothing too treacherous whatsoever, simply someone who will take me from point A to point B. If you would be so kind it would make me most gratuitous.” Lycan tried to make his voice sound deeper and more mature, and use weird sophisticated words like he’d heard Barracuda use every now and then. He thought it made him sound stupid though, and made a mental note to never say “gratuitous” again. Gray was too tired and awkward to really pay attention to what was going on, other than the fact that shapes were looking at him. He didn’t like that. He especially didn’t like it when Ship looked at him, finding it hard to keep his cool. However, Lycan’s change in attitude and word use reminded him of someone, he smiled a little bit while loosely mouthing what Lycan was saying. Ship took a moment to look the stranger up and down. Gray head, blue legs and tail. Looks like some strange plant species they’d never seen before. They adjusted their eye patch and seemed to think for a moment before shrugging.

“Well I’m not much one for ferryin’, but I s’ppose a short favor really can’t be too bad. Where can I take ye, lad? Wherever it is I’d be willin to bring ye there for a small price and a short trip.” They spoke with a slight accent, peering at the stranger before them. Lycan’s tail wagged slightly, happy his plan was already going so well.

“The volcano please, and I do apologise if this is causing any inconvenience, I saw the bridge was out so you’re really my only option.” Lycan and Gray both felt a drop in optimism as a look of surprise overtook Ship’s face.

“The volcano!? Well.. y’see.. shapes have been stayin’ away from ‘ere for a little while now… There’s been rumours o’ some leftovers of the corruption there or somethin’ like that. Not sure what’s true and what isn’t, but I believe the resident grump’s been makin’ things a bit hard on those who want to visit. We’re working’ on getting the lad to come ‘round, but he hasn’t budged yet. I really don’t recommend going there lest yer ready if he tells ye to piss off, and his warnins ain’t always been verbal.” As Ship explained the reasons why going to the volcano would be a bad idea, Lycan and Gray realized at once who that “resident grump” must be… Barracuda. Gray felt that pit of guilt forming in his stomach once again. Lycan felt worried about if he would be welcome back. He and Barracuda had already butted heads for the time he was staying there, if Barracuda was now even more irritable, he might take one look at Lycan and pelt him with rocks until he leaves. He gulped before responding.

“Ah… It‘s certainly unfortunate to hear that, but you see getting to the volcano is very important to me. I… uh… left my wedding ring there! I simply cant leave it behind, my wife has been berating me about being such a clutz for months!” It was a terribly lie, but it was the first that came to mind so they just went with it. Ship gave a look of surprise, then understanding.

“Aye… I can see how important of a trip that would be. Ok, I’ll take ye, but just be sure to find it and leave as soon as you can, I’ll leave my vessel waiting around the outskirts of the island and come in with ye, I don’t want ye dealing with ol’ Grumps alone.”

“Wait, n-no!” Lycan realised how much of an idiot he was, retrieving an item was more of a short term in-and-out visit, and that certainly wasn’t what either him or Gray needed. He sighed then thought up another story, feeling nervous and pressured by Ship’s confused look. He could only imagine how scared he was making Gray right now.

“Uh, look… I may have lied to you about that previous story. You see, I’m actually an old friend of Barracuda’s family, though over the years we sort of lost touch. I heard about this… incident he was involved in and felt it would be only right to come out and check on him. Please, I just need someone to discretely take me there so I can stay with him and make sure everything will be ok.” Lycan hoped desperately that this new story would be convincing enough for Ship. Gray, on the other hand had to deal with that knot of guilt in his stomach worsening. This whole situation was so draining, and that look of pity which formed onto Ship’s face certainly didn’t help. He usually hated looks like that, but maybe this time it was a good thing, it might mean Ship was buying Lycan’s story.

“…Alright I understand. I’ll take ye there free of charge, just… please do what you can to calm him. We only want peace, and to move on from all that mess.” Ship sighed and walked over to the dock, a sky blue sailboat tied up there.

“This certainly ain’t my most impressive vessel, but she does the job just fine for quick errands!” They hopped on and motioned for the stranger to follow. Lycan and Gray let a wave of relief wash over them, though the journey was only just beginning, they had to get through the trip to the volcano and dealing with Barracuda first before they could really rest. Lycan boarded and sat down slowly, doing his best to stay steady so Gray wouldn’t be jostled and fall.

“Thank you very much, it really means a lot to me.” Despite the previous lies, Lycan meant every word of this. Ship just smiled at them as they prepped everything for sailing. Once the boat was in order and undocked, beginning to venture away from the shore, they turned back to the stranger in their boat.

“Ye know, ye never did tell me yer name, and I’m not sure I told ye mine either! Well Ye can call me Ship! A fitting name for a sea captain, I know. I’m proud of it.” Thye puffed their chest out then offered a hand to the stranger, awaiting a response. Lycan froze. They thought and thought and thought, but nothing good came to them. He had done so well with everything else, why was this what was giving him trouble!? They silently panicked until he felt Gray sort of reluctantly tap them on the head and try to make some sort of gesture without moving too much. It was a little hard to understand but Lycan thought he got the picture, reaching his pink-free hand out to shake Ship’s.

“Call me Gray.”

#js&b #jsab #jsab blixer #just shapes and beats #jsab lycanthropy #long post #story segment

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thelaudown · 3 years

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hyouka poly slowburn so its like: (post-anime)

satoshi and mayaka are dating all through highschool and houtarou and eru are maybe a little more invested than friends would normally be, and step in when they have problems to a degree that regular people would call a boundary issue.

houtarou and mayaka still give each other shit at every opportunity, but theyre much more outwardly friendly than before, and if she ever argues w satoshi houtarou is the first to say that theres no way its her fault. maybe one time it is and he confronts her abt it in a way that forces her to take him seriously. its the respect and codependency for me.

mayaka and satoshi have functioning eyes and houtarous feelings for eru are completely obvious to them. unfortunately shes a little harder to read, so they never really get further than being very close friends and committing to being together for the foreseeable future, as far as this road will take them - its the same dynamic for the entire friend group, but satoshi starts seriously considering a proposal in third year.

he and mayaka will be seperated through college - she wants to go to art school, he thinks he might like to be a teacher (specifically of like, textiles or language) and he thinks long distance is too much to ask of her. after a serious conversation she agrees and they take a break through college, but they are tentatively engaged, will be keeping in touch, and want to pick things back up once theyre both in the same location again.

mayaka and eru flat in college, bringing up mayakas long buried feelings for her, and theyve always been so touchy, and she has a feeling that erus guilty about something? but she doesnt want to get her hopes up. she gets really frustrated and confides in the only person who knows both satoshi and mayaka and isnt involved - HOUTAROU, who attends a less prestigious college than eru but is taking similar business courses (he hasnt forgotten) and is commuting from home.

hes closer to them than satoshi, but theres still a little distance and they dont meet as often as theyd like, partially bc he doesnt often make the effort - the energy he does have is expended on his classes, bc he has a motivation to do well - if he does, maybe eru will consider him without him even putting himself out there. anyway she still calls him on the phone all the time tho.

he doesnt really have any advice when mayaka speaks to him, but hes quick to reassure her that satoshi wouldnt be bothered by her feelings - "because its eru". functioning adults refer to each other by their first names. it was a super embarassing transition period but theyre used to it now.

so mayaka takes the leap and eru admits that while shes never really been one to dwell on romantic feelings, she reciprocates but is concerned abt satoshi - she loves him too, after all, and he and mayaka were/are/will be a great couple. she ends up confessing this to houtarou, filled w apologies and assurances that he neednt worry abt her personal matters, but he doesnt mind listening. anyway it stings (in a sad way, not a bitter one) that she apparently has interest in both mayaka and satoshi but not him, but he REALLY cant blame her. he tells her that he doesnt know how to advise her and she thanks him for listening, and then he does probably the most meddlesome thing hes ever done and calls satoshi and tells him everything.

satoshi is really cool abt it, and hits him w "lol if theyre dating what if i just take you out to lunch. fairs fair. what do you mean you dont know about my massive crush on you, mr observer didnt pick it up? oh wow okay youre really stupid when it comes to yourself. ill pick you up on friday" and then satoshi calls mayaka and gives her his blessing and assures that he loves them both and wishes them the best and wow they REALLY need to catch up soon. hell bring houtarou and they can compare date notes! and he hangs up.

satoshi is still kind of a petty guy and he probably only confessed to houtarou bc he was taken off guard, but hes not being inauthentic by any means. this is the new improved satoshi 2.0, who is becoming more comfortable w there being things he doesnt like abt himself and working on them and getting his feelings out constructively, rather than pushing them down and refusing to put himself in situations that might turn out badly. he gets his hopes up again, and is happier for it even when hes let down.

eru is shocked to hear abt houtarou and satoshi. mayaka isnt. they talk abt it, interspersed w making out, and are shocked to realise that they like both of them - mayaka is ESPECIALLY taken off guard, both by her own feelings and erus, which shed never noticed before. she almost tells eru abt houtarous 3+ years of pining, but stops herself lest things get messy. shes starting to get an idea, but needs to tread lightly. besides, its not like houtarou wld ever like her. theyre barely even friends. it doesnt all add up as evenly as shed like.

for houtarous part, hes genuinely in wtf mode irt satoshis feelings for him, and hes been in eru chitanda hell for so long that he never considered anything else, but now that he IS.... satoshi isnt so bad. he was always really cute w mayaka, when he wasnt being annoying for fun and profit. sure. okay. so they do some gay double dating through college, but the cross couple pining dont stop. satoshi is absolutely still obsessed w mayaka, but houtarou doesnt mind bc he cant take his eyes off eru whenever they meet up either.

she still calls him on the phone all the time, and when schoolwork picks up he often finds himself calling her w thoughts or questions. they do some more thought exercises, but they dont need to argue as an excuse, and she barely has to badger him anymore. one day he looks at himself and sees a functioning adult who spends a moderate amount of energy on things that arent necessarily necessary, and wants to sigh, but. hes happy.

college ends and they all find themselves back in kamiyama - satoshi is student teaching at their old middle school, eru is hard at work for her family, mayaka is working while she works on her manga debut, and houtarou is working while he figures out what he actually wants.

its clear to all of them that mayaka and satoshi need to have a talk, so they do, and they come up with... poly. its unconventional, but they really are happy, and they really do love each other, and mayaka would love to start wearing her ring again (satoshi never took his off, and she pretended not to notice but she had the biggest lady boner over it).

so now sometimes eru and houtarou are hanging out while their boyfriend and girlfriend are out on dates being engaged, making up for lost time and considering the practicality of marriage while they both have sidepieces, and houtarou and eru are pining BAD, but neither notices the other and he asks how her business is going and maybe kind of offers his assistance platonically.

so now THATS happening, and satoshi and mayaka get to talking one day abt how those two should date, shld we do smth? and if they did then the only pieces missing are mayaka/houtarou and satoshi/eru which is a beautiful dream but wld never happen, what do you mean he/she wld love to date you, wait really, oh my god, what, are we doing this,

and houtarou who has been working himself up to confessing for the past SEVEN YEARS, never gets to bc satoshi and mayaka interrupt while theyre at work and do it for him

#jhkgfjkfjg #hyouka #txt #god i put it in bullets to try and make it legible but im here for suggestions bc this is so much #myfic #sure thats a tag now i dont normally post much of anything but!! i want to be more active so take this #if literally anyone is out there and has poly feelings about these 4 please message me

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the-sanders-sides · 7 years

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Virgil is having a rlly hard time doing basic things. i.e. talking to the other sides, he's getting too nervous, cants sleep at nite. He goes to Logan for advice. Yet butterflies attack his insides and when he look as at Logan all he can do is blush and the same is happening for Logan. Idk it's all fluff in my head

Pairing: Analogical

Warnings: Sleep deprivation

Word Count: 784

Sleepy Crushes

Virgil washaving one of those days. One of those days where his heart was beating too fast,his hands too shaky, and every little sound would make him jump.

He couldbarely sleep the night before as his thoughts spiraled to all the mistakes hemade the day before: he dropped Patton’s cookies, so obviously Patton hated himnow; he spaced out when Roman was talking to him, so now Roman probably thinkshe doesn’t care about him; and he played his music so loudly that Logan had totell him to make it quieter so he could work, so now Logan believes that he’s disrespectful.

Logan. Normally Virgil would go to Loganfor help when he can’t sleep, lest he have a day like this. But lately, Virgil’sbeen having these butterflies in his stomach when he talks to Logan,and no they aren’t just normal I-am-talking-to-someone-dear-lord-save-meanxiety feelings.These butterflies have been more likeI-have-a-stupid-crush-dear-lord-save-me feelings.

Virgildespised crushes. It would all eventually lead to heartbreak, and if the otherperson wasn’t chill enough, he’d lose a friend over some stupid awkwardness. SoVirgil took to not talking to Logan. It was better to just avoid him while hetried to stomp these feelings out.

Unfortunately,it was not that easy.

While hewas sitting in his dark corner in the Mind Palace and listening to music to drownout his anxieties, Logan tapped Virgil’s shoulder to get his attention (Whichas an unintended consequence, made Virgil shriek. Virgil later called Logan a “jumpscare”to play it off.).

“Virgil,”Logan said quietly, voice laced with apprehension, “Did you sleep last night? Ihave… observed that today you have been in a state of unease. I want toreassure you that it is no bother for you to come to me when you need helpgrounding yourself.”’

“I- Yeah, Ididn’t sleep much last night, and whatever I did sleep, I didn’t sleep well,”Virgil whispered. He started to scratch at his forearm for some semblance ofcontrol—the social interaction on top of everything else today made him feelmore disquieted.

Logan held Virgil’s hand away from Virgil’sforearm and looked into the darker trait’s eyes, while the former susurrated abreathing exercise. However, instead of focusing on the breathing exercise,Virgil’s full attention was on his proximity to Logan. A small blush startedcreeping up on Virgil’s face, and when he say that one was slowly appearing inturn on Logan, Virgil averted his eyes.

Noticingthis, Logan coaxed, “Is everything alright Virgil?”

“Y-Yeah, I,I just- Uh…,” Virgil stammered.

“It’s okay.Take your time.”

“I don’t-You-,” Virgil sighed exasperatedly as he tried to find the right words, “Feelings—the bane of both of ourexistences.”

“Ah, I see,”Logan pushed his glasses up his nose, “Would you care to explain thesefeelings? Talking about whatever is bothering you often helps relieve thestress it’s causing.”

“I-I’drather not… You could start to mind my company after I tell you.”

“Virgil, Icould never mind your company. Well, that is unless you committed arson,murder, or other more horrifying acts.”

Virgilhuffed and crossed his arms. “Fine, I’ll tell you. But don’t say I didn’t warnyou. I…,” Virgil gulped and took in a breath of air so he would have enough tobe able to speak as fast as he was about to, “have stupid, unnecessary crushfeelings on you that I want to get rid of otherwise it’ll lead to us not beingfriends anymore!”

Logan’seyes widened a dash, but his expression remained unreadable. Virgil started toget worried until Logan finally said, “I also have stupid and unnecessary crushfeelings on you.”

A mixtureof shock and surprise spread on Virgil’s face. “Y-You do?”

“Yes. I do.However, I feel as though we should pause this discussion and continue anothertime, for I can visibly see the exhaustion fully setting in from your sleeplessnight. And that just makes your anxiety worse, so we should get you to bed.Would you like to sleep in my room so it can keep you more grounded?”

“Y-Yeah,that’d be chill.” Logan nodded and picked up Virgil bridal style as he sunk theboth of them to his room. Virgil lightly chuckled. “I never would’ve thoughtthat you nerds are so strong.”

“We all havethe same body. You must be gettingreally tired if you forgot that.”

“It was justa joke, Logan.” Virgil yawned and found himself being placed on Logan’sincredibly soft bed. Logan tucked in Virgil, kissed his forehead, and whispered,“Sleep well, Virgil,” as the last bits of consciousness drifted away from him.

Tag List: @antisocialili @beach-fan @velocifoxy @satisfied-sanders-sides @whatin–tarnation @zoeyheys @moxietyisreal @thedemonsofmysoul @ukeleledun21 @the-prince-and-the-emo @lackingroman @charles-knee @iaminmultiplefandoms @monochrome-dusk @virgilsspidercurtains @forfanderssake @mira-jadeamethysts @caristars @evilmuffin Go here if you want to be added to the tag list

#sanders sides #analogical #virgil sanders #logan sanders #thomas sanders #my fic #mine

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viralhottopics · 7 years

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Happiness Hack: This One Ritual Made Me Much Happier

When my wife and I moved to New York City in 2001, recently graduated from college and newlywed, we were eager to find friends. We knew nearly no one but were sure wed soon find a fun-loving group like the 20- and 30-something New Yorkers who spontaneously dropped in on one another on

We hatched a plan. After moving into our Midtown Manhattan apartment, we invited all the neighbors over for drinks by placing Kinkos-printed quarter-sheets into everyones mailboxes. Then, we waited for our versions of Chandler, Kramer, and Elaine to show up. But they didnt. In fact, no one did. As the ice in the cooler melted and the guacamole browned, not a single person among 100 apartments stopped by. Not. One. Person.

Recalling that episode now, we sound embarrassingly nave. We didnt realize friendships in the real world worked nothing like the ones we had forged in our dormitories, let alone those we saw on television. Yet as it turns out, our desire to belong to a tight community was far from foolish.

Recent studies have shown a dearth of social interaction with people you care about and who care about you not only leads to loneliness, but is also linked to a range of harmful physical effects. In other words: A lack of close friendships may be hazardous to your health.

Dying for Friends

A 2010 meta-analysis reviewed 148 studies involving over 300,000 participants and concluded that having weak social ties was as harmful to health as being an alcoholic and twice as harmful as obesity. Julianne Holt-Lunstad, co-author of the analysis, told Reuters, A lack of social relationships was equivalent to smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day.

A more recent study, published in the , found a biological response to loneliness that triggers disease. According to the researchers, social isolation sets off a cellular chain reaction that increases inflammation and suppresses the bodys immune response.

Perhaps the most compelling evidence that friendships affect longevity comes from the ongoing Harvard Study of Adult Development. Since 1938, researchers have been following 724 men, tracking their physical health as well as social habits. Robert Waldinger, the studys current director, said in his recent TED Talk, The clearest message that we get from this 75-year study is this: Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period. Socially disconnected people are, according to Waldinger, less happy, their health declines earlier in midlife, their brain functioning declines sooner, and they live shorter lives than people who are not lonely.

Lest we think having 500 Facebook friends might offer some protection, Waldinger warns, Its not just the number of friends you have its the quality of your close relationships that matters.

So what makes for a quality friendship? William Rawlins, a professor of interpersonal communications at Ohio University who studies the way people interact over the course of their lives, told The Atlantic that satisfying friendships need three things: Somebody to talk to, someone to depend on, and someone to enjoy.

Finding someone to talk to, depend on, and enjoy comes naturally when were young. In college, for example, we build strong bonds when nearly everyone around us is also searching for connection. But as we grow into adulthood, the model for how to maintain our friendships isnt clear. We graduate and go our separate ways, pursuing careers and starting lives miles apart from our best friends.

Suddenly work obligations and ambitions trump buddies and brewskis. It becomes impossible to be spontaneous without planning for weeks, if not months, in advance. Once children enter the picture, exhilarating nights on the town become exhausted nights on the couch.

Friendships Starve to Death

Unfortunately, the less time we invest in people, the easier it is to make do without them until one day it becomes too awkward to reconnect. Since we havent spoken for so long, we think, where would we even begin? If we were still close friends wouldnt we have spoken more by now?

This is how friendships die they starve to death. But as the research reveals, by allowing those friendships to starve, were also mal nourishing our bodies.

Case in point: Several months ago, I found myself in a funk. I now live in San Francisco and whenever someone asked, How are you? my reply was the standard Silicon Valley yuppie salute: Good! Super busy! Yet this wasnt exactly true. I wasnt good.

To put things in perspective, I wasnt bad, either. Things were fine. By all measures, more than fine I had a healthy family, a growing business, and interesting clients to work with. Id recently published a book that became a Wall Street Journal bestseller, and if my social media stats were to be believed, I had plenty of friends and followers.

And yet, the funk. I soon identified the problem: The more professional opportunities came my way, the more time I spent away from my real-life friends the people I truly cared about. Maintaining friendships with people to talk to, depend on, and enjoy takes time.

As an undergraduate, I first heard the term residual benefactor in an economics class. A residual benefactor is the chump who gets whatever is left over when a company is liquidated typically, not much. When were not careful, the people we care about often become residual benefactors: We leave them for last, giving them whatever bits of time are left over after weve attended to everything else.

The Solution, the Kibbutz

If the food of friendship is time together, how do we make the time to ensure were all fed? My friends and I have recently come across a way to keep each other close. It fits into our lifestyles despite busy schedules and a surfeit of children. We call it the kibbutz.

In Hebrew, the word means gathering, and for our gathering, four couples meet every two weeks to talk about one question sort of like an interactive TED Talk over a picnic lunch. The question might range from a deep inquiry, like Whats one thing your parents taught you that you want to pass on to your children? to a lighter, more practical question, like How do you disconnect from your iPhone on weekends?

Having a topic helps in two ways. For one, it gets us past the small talk of sports and weather, and helps us open up about stuff that actually matters. Second, it prevents the gender split that happens when couples convene in groups men in one corner, women in another. The question of the day gets us all talking together.

Consistency and Stiff-Arming the Kids

Every other week, rain or shine, the kibbutz is on our calendars consistency is key. Theres no back-and-forth emailing to find a time. We always meet at the same place, and each couple brings their own food so theres no prep or cleanup. If one couple cant make it, no biggie, the others carry on the conversation.

What about the kids? In our group, kids are welcome, but they dont run the show. Typically they play on their own, but if they interject, theyre given a stern response that sounds something like: Im having a conversation with my friends because my friends are important to me. Youre welcome to listen or join the conversation, but please dont interrupt unless its an emergency.

For our childrens sake, we want them to know that adult friendships matter. We dont want them to have to rely on TV to figure out how adults interact. By watching us, our children see that being a good friend means listening when others have something to share, and not being distracted by anything else including our cellphones, the football game, or even our own children (unless someone is bleeding). The entire affair lasts about two hours, and I always leave the kibbutz with new ideas and insights.

Most important, I feel closer to my friends. No, our group isnt as funny or spontaneous as the pseudo-New Yorkers I grew up watching on TV. But it turns out that fun wasnt what I was missing it was authentic, caring friendships. Making time to invest in my most important relationships finally snapped me out of my funk and provided the psychological nourishment I didnt know I was missing.

Not only that, it turns out the time I spend with my friends is also an investment in my future health. Forget diets and the latest workout routines. The best medicine may be to gather your favorite people around a table and make a toast: To friendship, and your health.

Heres the Gist:

Studies show adult friendships have a significant impact on our happiness and well-being.

Committing to my kibbutz has had the biggest impact on my happiness over the past year. Heres how our group works, but the lessons can apply to any adult friendship:

Book the time Reserve time on your calendar for the foreseeable future so there’s no guesswork or scheduling headaches about when well see each other again. Our group meets every two weeks.

Go deep Talking about a meaningful topic strengthens your bonds. Get past the shallow small talk. In our group, a different member brings the question of the day to each meeting.

Dont let kids derail you Children benefit from seeing you model a healthy adult friendship. Tell the kids they can listen or participate, but they cant interrupt unless its an emergency.