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#welcome to night vale transcripts

hooklineandpodcast · 1 year

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Feels like now is a good time to mention Welcome to Night Vale is both fantastic and still ongoing.

It was the foundation for a lot of fictional podcasts now, and was definitely a big part of the growth in popularity of fictional podcasts. It was a lot of people's first podcast. It still stands up today among the greats.

#welcome to night vale #welcome to nightvale #welcome to Nightvale pod #nightvalepod #wtnv #lgbtq characters #podcast recs #fictional podcast #transcripts available

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reddstardust · 11 months

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Welcome to Night Vale, 25, One Year Later

The Magnus Archives, 161, Dwelling

Hello From The Hallowoods, 67, Silences

Malevolent, 27, The Roots

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enjoy-purple-skies · 8 months

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This. This entire khoshekh arc. I’m bawling my eyes out and my dinner is not safe from my tears

MY HEART IS IN KNOTS. HOW DO I STOP THIS

#wtnv spoilers #wtnv #welcome to night vale #wtnv podcast #cecil palmer #khoshekh #wtnv 208 #cecil in the big city #wtnv transcript

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kerink · 10 months

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hey maybe dont listen to the new wtnv patreon bonus episode if you have ocd or struggle with morality related intrusive thoughts.

i think it's possible to edit out while still maintaining integrity of the episode, so maybe ask a friend to if youre curious

this episode doesnt seem to matter tho and can be easily skipped

#EDIT: by edit out i mean of the transcript which they provided with the episode #wtnv #welcome to night vale #it looks like it may be an episode detailing what happens during reeducation #idk its late ill have to reread but thats my first impression

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grimbeak · 11 days

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I swear to fucking god there was a kevin episode with a segment about a kid climbing into a hole and very painfully turning into a tree??? must've been in the strex arc bc i CANNOT find it in any of the episodes past that

#literally could've sworn it was in all smiles eve #maybe it was but isn't in the transcript???#i swear. i swear.#hello.#wtnv spoilers #welcome to night vale spoilers

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wtnvwritings · 8 months

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Broadcasts from Nowhere - Pilot

List of Episodes | Audio

Summary: A new radio host reports on an even newer law passed by City Council to give employees 'vacations'. Plus, an update to Night Vale's second Dog Park and a enigmatic forecast of the weather.

You know, a lot of people pose the age-old question: what came first, the chicken... or the egg?

People will generally have an answer of their own, offering reasons why they themselves are correct and all others false in their belief.

But does it even matter?

The chicken and egg are both equally small beneath the infinitesimal weight of the universe, both helpless to the onslaught of time, both eventually returning to the very stardust and void that created them in the first place.

And the correct answer, as a reminder from the Sheriff's Secret Police's existential question task force, is a frog. Anyone who answers differently will be immediately confiscated for re-education and fined up to 500 dollars or the equivalent worth in trade secrets.

Listeners, here are your Broadcasts from nowhere.

City Council has enacted a new law earlier today. In a press conference scheduled only three minutes after it was announced, they decreed that vacations are now a concept that legally exist, and that places of employment are required to give employees paid time off according to the hours that they work over a scheduled period. Applicable work activities can include but are not limited to: hiding from government agencies, taking part in government-sponsored cover-ups, authorized community service, childcare, existing on Wednesdays, existing on non-Wednesdays, and golfing.

There has been some push back to this new law, with many citizens claiming that it is not the right of local government to decide how employers compensate their workers.

"Back in my day, we didn't even get a paycheck," said Night Vale citizen and worker Tristan Fetch. "We simply wandered out into the desert and returned home without a memory of how we had spent the day, pockets full of bloodstones, paper clips and the occasional empty chapstick tube." He continued talking about the various employment traditions of Night Vale past, but unfortunately it was in an ancient language that nobody could translate, so I can only assume that was what he was still talking about.

When asked him to elaborate or perhaps switch to a language that could be understood, Fetch simply shook his head and vanished into a thin puff of ashy black smoke, and could not be later located for further questions. He left behind the lingering feeling of wistful love for things that were that never again will be, and a general discontent with the youth of today.

One particularly passionate citizen has been seen protesting just outside the Night Vale radio station. Many of you may know him as the main host of news here at the station as well local workaholic who really needs to take a few days off every now and again, Cecil Palmer.

When asked for comment, he said, "If I want to work an exhaustive number of hours beyond what is physically possible by the laws of space-time, the that is my right as an American citizen! How will the station function without me? Who will remember to check the mail?"

Cecil was then removed from the premises by members of the Sheriff's Secret Police and reminded, 'Please, Cecil, we can't keep doing this.' This marks the third time he has been escorted away from the station during his legally-mandated vacation that, as a reminder, had begun yesterday.

For listeners who do not possess omnipotence--and our condolences go out to you--the person who is current updating you on the Night Vale news is senior Intern Daniel Van Heler. The same one who had been declared dead after an unfortunate run-in with a door that led to nowhere--after being declared un-dead by an ominous hooded figure and a doctor with a questionable medical degree, I've been assigned to fill in for Cecil whenever he is out of the station.

While I know we can all appreciate his dedication to radio journalism, recent events have made clear that having some time away from work is integral to a healthy mind, body, and is also now a punishable offense.

I hope that you all can enjoy the sound of my voice when I'm filling in for our beloved radio host; if not, then please make sure to notate any feedback you have on the commentary card that has been placed inside of your wallet when you weren't looking. If you do not possess a wallet, then you can find it inside your government-assigned citizen's information file. If you do not have that, then a member of the Sheriff's Secret Police is already at your doorstep.

The city council has announced the opening of a brand new, state-of-the-art dog park off the corner of Earl and Valleyview. No, not that dog park, a new dog park! A completely separate dog park that does not at all have any relationship to any other dog park that may or may not exist just two blocks away on the corner of Earl and Somerset.

This one, simply called 'the dog park' by city council--please do not confuse it with the other one--is open to people, dogs, secret police, surveillance drones, and cats that act like dogs.

There are a variety of amenities available, and a strong non-electrified fence around the perimeter, which means you can let your canine companion loose as long as they play nicely with others!

Strange hooded figures are not found at this new dog park, but they can still be found at the old dog park, staring on at anyone who passes by and enters into the new park with a gaze that can only be described as 'haunting, as if staring into the heavy eyes of someone who should not be, but yet they are'.

Listeners, I bet those hooded figures are just jealous!

We've never seen one with an actual dog, after all, so I wonder if they just can't stand not being able to check out this neat new dog park we have built! If you're listening and you have a dog, or are just interested in a little extra government surveillance in your life, then you should absolutely check it out the next time you're out for a walk!

Do you like numbers? Do you like hearing people say numbers? For an inexplicably long amount of time, perhaps?

Have you ever wanted to know what the largest prime number is?

If you said yes to any one of these questions--or if because you are legally mandated to do so by recent changes in city law--then make sure to tune in to 'Reciting Prime Numbers Until We Reach the End Or Pass Out From Sleep Deprivation'.

This exciting new segment will be hosted by our very own Cecil Palmer and guest star 'Vsauce, Michael Here', known better by his middle name Michael. I'm sure some listeners may recognize him from before City Council had declared Youtube a website that doesn't actually exist, and the two of them will be explaining how someone can find the largest countable prime number simply by listing each one in chronological order. Maybe this will help make math easier for some of us, eh?

The first part will air tomorrow evening at 5pm Central Standard time, and will end after Cecil and Michael reach the largest countable prime number or until they succumb to the needs of their mortal bodies and pass out in the recording booth.

Next up, lets take a look at what the weather is like here in Night Vale.

Listeners, I know that you are used to a particular way that Cecil announces the weather, but unfortunately I do not possess certain inethreal skills such as 'having permission' and 'copyright' for all that weather forecasting, so I've decided to try a couple different things to give you all an equally qualified and arguably accurate experience!

So, for the next thirty seconds, I want you to close your eyes and envision the sky.

What color is it? Are there any clouds? Ominous dark shapes sitting on the horizon? Does the air feel cold against your imagined skin? Warm? Can you hear a low humming without a discernible origin? Ignore that humming, ignore the ominous dark shapes that seem to be getting closer with every glance towards them.

There are large hills around you. Not mountains, since they don't exist, but they tower high above you on every side and reach far into the heavens. Are they watching you? Judging you? Are these a barrier to keep you safe, or a cage to keep you trapped?

Do you even want to know the answer?

Now, listeners, open your eyes. Do you feel better? Perhaps even a little refreshed?

Wonderful! Try your best to take this feeling and carry it with you today, and pay no mind or attention to the prophetic visions you'll have tonight. Hopefully I've also passed on the forecast in your local area for the next 72 hours. Make sure to have an umbrella in your car!

On an unrelated note listeners, having a blank journal next to your bed can be a fantastic way to help you record and remember your dreams! After all, you can never be sure when you'll be granted a flash of creativity, doom, accurate weather predictions, or the next winning numbers to the mega millions lottery.

An update on the new law requiring employers to give their workers vacation time, which also now legally exists: while some citizens still dislike the requirement, others have started to speak openly in favor of vacation hours, even citing that it has already begun to boost the local economy of Night Vale.

Mary Smith, owner of Night Vale's most popular pastry shop, said, "I'm seeing a lot more people coming into my store. The extra hours of free time they have now means they can actually do stuff outside of work, like buying my pastries--which in all honesty is a new experience in itself. I don't think I've ever had a customer before. Or sold a pastry before. Huh. When did I start this business again?"

Mary thought she had more to say, but was too preoccupied in personal revelations to offer very much after that.

Suffice to say listeners, I'd have to agree that the new law is helping to boost several sectors of Nightvale's economy! We're already getting word of at least a dozen small businesses and a few franchises that have been discovered along Main Street as places that exist, and all of them are starting to get wonderful reviews on Yelp! I even hear that our beloved radio host Cecil was spotted having a lovely lunch date with Carlos with some of his accrued vacation time.

Since we're coming up to the end of this broadcast section, I myself might even have to go see some of these new hot spots of the town for myself. I hear one of them sells some really delicious ice cream, and I'll be sure to update you all on it on my next broadcast, which will be whenever you turn on your radio next and least expect to hear my voice.

In the meantime, please stay tuned for the sound of rushing water that will make you think you've left the faucet on, even though you've checked at least three times already.

So goodnight, Nightvale.

Goodnight.

#wtnv #wtnv cecil #welcome to night vale #broadcasts from nowhere #transcript #bfn transcript #i wanted to post the audio first but I've been sitting on this for MONTHS and decided to toss out the need for perfection #so i'll hopefully have the audio version done soon now that it's out there #its fun to write in the nightvale style! i missed it a lot

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asydicsydney · 6 months

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Guess who was right about 236 being a filler ep??? :)

But fr, anything that brings back old side characters (TROY WALSH HII) is a win

Also Dessa, Sabina, gurl, that shit was banging

#wtnv #welcome to night vale #wtnv spoilers #wtnv 236 #can the transcript pls post i have to write down the good cold open #it's 10 oclock. do you know what your kids are?#also the European tour getting announced to be in MARCH BEFORE MY SHOW IS AHHHHHH >:(

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podcastranscript-rater · 5 months

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Podcast: Welcome to Nightvale

show link: https://www.welcometonightvale.com

Final rating: 7.75/10 - Good

More details ↓

Accuracy - 8/10

Almost all lines are accurate, with a rare missing/added number or word. Most interjections are not transcribed, and sadly music with lyrics is usually written as [music: song name], with the actual lyrics not being transcribed.

Ease of access - 5/10

Transcripts cannot be found through episodes, rather you have to go on the official website, and then search for the individual transcript. The system the page uses is quite obtuse - there is a search tool, however it is quite slow and doesn’t really work.

Completeness - 10/10

All episodes have transcripts as far as I can tell!

Descriptiveness - 8/10

By nature of the podcast, not much has to be described. Sound effects are briefly transcribed, however tone of voice and things like that are very rarely described.

Fan transcripts? - None that I could find

Font: Proxima Nova

Overall pretty good transcripts, main place it lost points is the music thing and the difficulty of actually getting to the transcripts. (that might be an issue on my part though, lmk if it is!)

#8/10 #rating #welcome to night vale #wtnv #coloured text #audio fiction #podcasts #welcome to nightvale transcript

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ishipgenfics · 1 year

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The Glow Cloud, Explained

Well, I was going to try to catch up from where I was but this arc seems really cool so I'm just jumping it. I know who Lubelle is from Tumblr posts, so let's go!

First thought: Oh my god Cecil's voice is so pretty. How did it get even prettier? How. How is this possible.

Second thought: 'After I finish my radio show of course.' Dork. I love him so much.

Third thought: It's odd to have Cecil pointing out that things are weird, but I guess Night Vale is a little more aware of their weirdness since the Huntokar thing. Not explaining of it, no, that's just this lady, but aware.

Fourth thought: Oh my god her voice. She sounds so... condescending. Like, yes, I know what it is best for you, I know the right thing. I know the answer, just go sit in the corner and listen. I've had teachers like her and hated them, they don't listen. That is a perfect voice. I love it, and I hate it.

Fifth thought: Until there is not an ounce of poetry left. Yup. That's a very good line. Unravel everything until there's nothing left of it but string and despair. I kind of get it, I like answers too, but this is... bad. And wrong. Scientists don't act like this. This isn't how science works. If Night Vale is different, you expand your understanding. You don't try to force everything to be the way you think it should be.

Sixth thought: Cecil. Calm down about the lanes.

Seventh thought: My Carlos's science is so interesting to me. It's the way that people look at science, without any of the substance. Beakers and numbers, yes, but what is he actually finding out? And that kind of science, in Night Vale, is safe. (Plus Carlos probably does do actual investigations. We know Cecil is unreliable at time.)

Eight thought: Poor Cecil. I just want to give him a hug, he sounds so scared. He's the Voice of Night Vale. This town is part of him. It is the place where everyone he loves lives. If Lubelle takes all those people away... what is NIght Vale?

Ninth thought: AT LEAST TEN EXOTIC BIRDS TO HAVE A JEWISH SERVICE. IT'S A FUCKING BIRD MINYAN THAT IS AMAZING. God I love NIght Vale.

Tenth thought: It isn't going to work. I've seen the writing on the wall I've heard her mutterings I know it isn't going to work. I'm so sorry. Cecil, Glow Cloud, everyone. I am so sorry.

And now, dear readers, I take you to the weather.

Special Weather Thought 1: Wow, this fits the situation really well. They don't all do this, I'm pretty sure. I've listened to a couple. Maybe I should listen to the weather more.

And we're back!

Eleventh thought: You're just going to write it off as collective hysteria? Sure. Okay. Very scientific, Lubelle. I'd like to see some sources for all this, if you don't mind. Because from what I can tell, mass hysteria can be used as an explanation for LITERALLY ANYTHING. And if the dead animals really are being picked up by dust devils, then why are there so many dust devils around NIght Vale?

I am going to kill you with your own damn logic, Lucelle. You can't keep doing this to my town.

Twelth Thought: No, NO no no no no no no PLEASE. You can't-- but you can. You can do it forever, and it's wrong, and I won't forget. It's the Glow Cloud, and it was real, and it was alive, and you killed it and you are wrong. You are wrong, Lucelle. I am a scientist and I will not forget.

Thirteenth Thought: We are all temporary arrangement of water Lucelle. We are all made of carbon and water and molecules and I know your death date and I am knocking on your door. I will fix this, Cecil. I promise.

Fourteenth Thought: All Hail. All Hail. All Hail.

Fifteenth Though: That child must never return Cecil. We cannot lose it too. It must stay safe and away from Night Vale, until I find a way to fix this.

Sixteenth Thought: Your voice is beautiful, Cecil, and I love you beyond words. Words can be twisted, their meaning and beauty stripped from them. I will not love you in words, Cecil.

Seventeenth Thought: Lucelle, I will fight you with everything I have in me. I will save this town, my town, from you. You may be a scientist, but I am The Scientist. I will stop you. For Cecil. For Night Vale. This I swear.

From the Notes of the Journal of Carlos the Scientist, recorded in full by a representative of the Vague Yet Menacing Government Agency.

#welcome to night vale #wtnv #episode 221 thoughts #maybe i'll just work backwards from here #who knows #i was on episode 125 #or the transcript of 125 #i've actually listened up to 70a I believe #and now 221 #this is confusing #time is confusing #sort of fanfiction

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fallen-juniper-leaves · 1 year

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ok this really sucks and i am in no way happy about it but. i just started listening to wtnv because I've been wanting to do that for a while now and the current circumstances reminded me again. but. uhhh. the voice. it's a nice voice i agree. but it's the same problem i had with zhongli which is that i personally cannot fucking stand it. something in my brain responds negatively to that specific.. raspiness? idk. it's very uncomfortable to listen to. maybe it's also the audio quality?? I'm not sure how to describe it exactly. it needs to be softer for me. maybe i can also change my equalizer settings

i also heard there were transcripts so I'll try that

#i think I'd generally need to read along the transcript anyway to properly process everything #oh well #wtnv #welcome to night vale #sucks to be me i guess

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skygemspeaks · 1 year

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I don't know who needs to hear this but if audio processing disorder, being d/Deaf/hoh, not having the attention span for podcasts ever deterred you from getting into Welcome to Night Vale, I need you to know that the official website has transcripts for all of its episodes, PLUS if you want to read it in book format, there are script books out for all the episodes, and each chapter has fun little notes from the authors about the writing of those episodes! I have the first script book and it's really nice, 10/10 would recommend.

#welcome to night vale #wtnv #cecilsweep

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