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patrocles · 1 year

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*guy who knows fuck all about twilight voice* i cannot even begin to describe how interested i am in your extremely specific thoughts on twilight. especially in regard to its takes on classism

I appreciate you so much for saying that especially since everything following this will be so deeply incoherent.

This is mainly in regards to the films since I've seen them recently and I haven't read the books since I was like 14.

The thing about Twilight is that the two defining discourses that dominated this series were "Is Bella a bad Feminist" and "Team Edward vs Team Jacob".

The idea that Bella (aged 17), upon meeting Edward (aged 109) and begins dating him, is ready to give up everything in her life to marry him, die, and become a vampire and devoting her entire life to him; does this set back womanhood decades or is this simply Bella exercising her free will. And the other being which guy is better for Bella, the mega wealthy Edward who can provide everything for her or working class poor Jacob who's the childhood friend.

Twilight didnt define the tropes of love triangles or even the concept of the girl plucked from obscurity and given the fairytale life by someone so insanely rich who could have chosen anyone but still chooses her. It's not even an objectively bad fantasy to explore. But I think what's kinda unique to Twilight and I think what a lot of bad booktok romance novels can trace their tropes back to in Twilight, is this idea that wealth can excuse any wrong-doing.

Edward is deeply controlling of Bella, he's condescending and belittles her, he grooms her, he leaves her deeply traumatized when he randomly abandons her in the second book/novel to the point of near catatonic depression. But ultimately at the end of the day it's fine because what Edward can provide for Bella makes it all worth it! He can take her places and buy her things, of course she'll be humble but that's why she's so #real. Hell it doesn't even matter that we don't even know what they even like about each other beyond mutual obsession and possession in the general sense. And this is something that's so pervasive in the romance genre, it's what spawned 50 Shades specifically. Abuse, physical or emotional, is excused by obscene wealth because what's temporary discomfort and domineering misogyny to private jets and mansions.

If we're being honest, the question of whether or not Bella is a good or bad feminist character is sort of moot when what we're actually seeing is just a sad story of an emotionally isolated girl have her entire existence wrapped up in Edward and know that she's never going to have a come-to-Jesus moment and value her own self worth over Edward. There's a scene in Eclipse when she tells Jacob that immediately after graduation, she's going to marry Edward and become a vampire like him. Jacob is angry about this but it's not even a "pick him over me" moment, but as a friend who doesn't want to see his best friend give up her entire existence to this guy. Even says, "he's got his hooks in you so deep". There's another scene when her father, (the MVP), just wants her to see her other friends outside of Edward and have some sort of life outside of Edward and it's almost like a metatextual awareness that SOMEONE in this story recognizes that Bella is being groomed and that this is all really REALLY toxic. It's a horror story! But of course it immediately pivots back to star crossed lovers bullshit because LOOK, Edward took her to a private island and they can travel the world. But more than anything it feels like they’re trying to establish a sort or attempt at a balance but what’s scary is knowing that Jacob and Charlie’s concerns and reservations are essentially pointless and empty compared to Edward’s financial and physical capabilities and the depth of his grooming in Bella. It’s actually charming that Charlie thinks he can realistically stand a chance against Edward if he really wanted to establish true parental control over his child. Like it’s genuinely sad to watch, actually.

And sure, so much of that we can write off as just being dated at worst. But definitely not end of the world stuff especially considering where that kind of trope has grown into way more severe cases of straight of kidnap/rape fantasy in mafia romance erotica we see today. Which is kind of MAD when you think about what teen girls were reading in the 00s versus what the teens of today are reading. I guess thanks Steph for being Mormon and keeping it PG???

But for ME, PERSONALLY, what's been kinda itching my brain in relation to this is how this pertains to Jacob. It is hard to view Twilight as mere late 00s nostalgia campy mess when I think about how absolutely awful Jacob is treated by the narrative for the sole crime of not being Edward, and by extension, wealthy. This isn't even about which guy was better for Bella, but how the story decides it was necessary for the reader to know that Jacob was NOT the correct option. He goes from earnest good guy who genuinely cares for Bella's physical and emotional well being as just a friend to her when Edward abandoned her, to basically a fucking incel who can't respect boundaries, and then Edward and Bella's lapdog in their happily ever after for no other reason than the narrative demanding it happen for Bella and Edward to be together. And for you the reader to want that to happen.

I've never been able to divorce the racial and classist undertones to this narrative choice to this. In a lot of media that came after that deals with love triangles, the "Jacob archetype" eventually became the often times not white, best friend, good guy type who was never really The One, but just another option for our Main Girl to explore until she gets back to the The One.

But thing is, Jacob was never just random guy option 2. He was working class poor and indigenous. A lot of his character is defined by this and his culture. And this HONESTLY made the Cullens animosity towards Jacob and the Pack kind of actually ridiculous and racist. Like I get Steph was just using the trope of Vampires and Werewolves: eternal enemies, but that isn't really applicable here when the shapeshifting isn't an trait that can be passed on to anyone like vampirism, but something unique to these specific people whose land they're infringing upon. So the little side digs and remarks and the absolute audacity that the Quileutes are just being so unreasonable when the Cullens have the money and means to live anywhere, but choose this boundary of a poor people who're merely trying to keep what's theirs, and we're still supposed to root for the Cullens because they're the Good Ones is like........... girl okay.

And this is all completely secondary to the way Steph appropriated the Quileute tribe, fucked around with their cultural traditions to invent her own lore, never financially compensated the tribe despite her and the producers of the films making MILLIONS, and two of the actors featured in the first film were recast for New Moon because they wouldn't cut their hair. BUT I DIGRESS.

I watched the New Moon special features where Chaske Spencer (who plays Sam) talks about how Jacob's house was extremely authentic to places he lived on his reservation. I'm not indigenous, but I did grow up working class poor and I personally always loved that this was a factor to Jacob and the pack. It didn't define them as people, but provided a sort of grounding depth and relatability that makes you want to explore them more. It isn't a lot but it's something. And hell, even Bella comes from a working class background which I genuinely liked especially as a youth when I'm trying to find some way to connect to this perfectly pretty white character.

But what's kinda frustrating in so many ways is how despite the alleged importance of Jacob and the Pack to the overall story, they are shelved so much. So we really don't get to see them, explore them as characters, their dynamics, and the tribe much as much as they could have been except for the very few times it's relevant to Bella and Edward. And given that Breaking Dawn specifically was TWO FILMS, there was no excuse for it. And it feels insulting to have the concept of the Pack, but we have to save our precious screen time for Bella and Edward playing chess.

I don’t even think people really understand just how almost non existent it is to see authentic depictions of lower/working class people in these kinds of stories. If you’ve never grown up poor it’s probably not something you even notice, just how default upper middle class almost everything (especially in YA) actually is. I think it’s something people don’t want to have to tackle so it just gets avoided? Unless we specifically need the 1 side character who is The Poor Friend, we need to have characters be in financially comfortable positions so the Plot can happen without having to worry about pesky things like bills. And so again, in that sort of authenticity it’s a double edged sword because while that is great to have included in a series like this, the classist undertones are so pervasive in how so much of Edward’s allure to Bella is rooted in wealth. A sort of inherent superiority to her own simple, non important life because of the trappings of his dress, his car, his mansion. There’s an unearned moral goodness that’s applied to Edward because of how we as a society view wealthy people as being inherently good and well meaning despite their actions consistently contradicting this. And it isn’t hard to see the ways in which this grooms Bella and that we the viewer must applaud this, cheer this, and would be aghast and disgusted if Bella was put off by the grandeur and wealth and wanted nothing to do with it because why would you possibly give that up? Again she can have the allusion of financial independence with a cute little job, but we know it isn’t necessary. We arent really meant to support the Quileute’s animosity towards the Cullens because they’re being irrational despite having bigger stakes that are considered frivolous and irrelevant to the Cullens (like retaining land autonomy). The best that Jacob could ever achieve in this story is to be at service to the Cullens and that’s meant to be a happy ending for him. Whatever his hopes and dreams were are inherently inferior to how important being the guard dog to a half vampire miracle child.

So yeah. I get the whole Twilight Renaissance, I get why people go back to it especially as it pertains to girlhood nostalgia. The soundtracks remain in constant rotation. I get why people want to reclaim the thing that made them happy in their youth when society shamed them for it as being just Cringe Girl Stuff. But for ME, it is hard for me to watch these and not be icked with how a lot of things were portrayed especially when it could have been a better story.

#yeah idk #i dont even have a thesis here just a stream of consciousness #i cant even begin to think about the absolute shit show that the TV series is going to be #when i was in my sickbed like a year ago i wrote an outline of twilight as a psycho thriller horror series #then i thought-- why am i wasting my time on this #twilight

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thegeminisage · 10 months

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okay im BACK in the spirit??? temple??? robot??? factory????? and im done with the last limb. i bet theres a boss. i KNOW theres a cutscene. lets fucking do this

bro this was LLLITERALLY in the trailers how did they put such endgame stuff in and we didnt know!!!

it's so funny. in the trailers we thought flux constructs were gonna be helpful and mineru's body was a boss. but they're bosses and she's helpful lol

god her voice sounds SO familiar

LINK CAN RIDE HER???? OH MY GOD

MECH GAME MECH GAME MECH GAME

oh my GODDD THIS IS WHAT ALL THOSE ARMORIES WERE FOR.......like PLOT WISE!!! i thought it was stupid to just have supplies sitting around

ok thats fucking bananas. im bad at fighting with her bc the enemies are too short lmfao

also im not sure im ready to do this boss thing. maybe i wanna go buy some more battery first...get more practice...

YOU CAN ATTACH A FAN AND DO A NARUTO RUN LOL

god i REALLY suck at fighting in the mech. it's weird! maybe bc i have emitters on her hands and not real weapons?!

oh sick you can give her cannons............

at this point like. i really can just let the gang kill the bad guys lol

the story path seems to be taking me directly to this path i was eyeing last night. i'm getting as far as the lightroot and then peacing out. like. i am getting my ASS beat down here

GLOOM HORRIBLINS?? will wonders never cease...

oooh good call on leaving. i can see a gloom hinox from here that i wouldve had to fight next...i have had more than enough of the story right now anyway, it's time to chill to keep it all Balanced

i bet if i went to lookout landing rn and talked to purah she'd be like I WONDER WHO THE FIFTH SAGE IS. let's try it

awww boo she can't travel with me until i get the secret stone.....

what a BUMMERRRRRR

oh wild!! you can explain about mineru to purah. then why tf cant i explain zelda is a dragon >:(

ok, actually, i decided i wanna go turn in that last claw to help the fucking mother statue or w/e. scary...........................

if im lucky i can just glide/dive there from the nearby tower lol

YOOOO wait dinraal's coming out of her hole...maybe i can snag a piece...

got one! i dont know if ive ever ridden dinraal for an extended period of time before...she is taking me so far from where i wanted to go. sigh

so, while i hate shooting the dragons, i love getting the little spike. i bet it feels sooooo good. like being groomed. a spa day for ms dinraal courtesy of one lunatic nonverbal swordsman

harder to admire the scenery from her back bc of the heat filter. NOT impossible. but harder

ugh there was a blood moon...i couldve gotten such cool pics but i was too slow :(

uh oh we're going down. girl i DONT wanna go back to the depths rn!!!

GOT MY SCALE. i was aiming at her fang but whatever. time to go back to the spring!!! i hope i can make it from here.......

MADE IT. whew. im not staying long idw to encounter any Hands

ok, so back to the mother goddess statue...

oh!!! she's okay again.......

wah she's SPARKLING. i'm welling up a little. it was so upsetting to see her toppled

omg she wants to give me a sword but my belongings are full. if it's the fucking goddess sword which 1. i got from amiibo and 2. MAKES NO SENSE...

well. it is.

finally spent my sage's wills on tulin. his arrows come in clutch and also i wanna go in order lol

i have to quit for now!! more later or tomorrow i suppose

#personal #loz blogging #totk lb #totk spoilers

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artzychic27 · 2 years

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Did some incorrect Total Drama All Stars quotes for the Discord. Here they are

Alec: Chloé, Kim, Sabrina, Lila, from now on, you're the Villainous Vultures!

Kim: Sha-team!

—

Marinette: Excuse me, how are hamsters heroic?

Alex: It was that, or the "Heroic Hippos."

Marinette: Hamsters it is.

—

Kim: Just watch. It’ll be exactly what Adrien’s afraid of.

*The wheel stops on a spider*

Alec: Or is it what Kim is afraid of?

Kim: *Screams*

Alix: Kim, I thought you were over spiders.

Kim: That is NOT a spider!

*A massive spider rises from a trap door into the boxing ring… Only to take off their head, revealing Marc*

Marc: Greetings, spider food! *Cackles*

Kim: *Screams again*

—

Alya: It's not like you ever texted me. *Notices the wax strips on Nino’s eyebrows* Are you getting your eyebrows waxed? Wow.

Nino: They call it "manscaping," because it is very manly. And I didn't text you BECAUSE I WAS TRAPPED IN A ROBOT SUIT!

—

Nathaniel: *Confessional* Lila is kind of scary sometimes. *Nick takes over* And I love when things get scary. *Changes back to Nathaniel, laughs* So uh, what was I saying?

—

Felix: Hello, Adrien. You look tired, and in need of exfoliation.

Adrien: I exfoliate once a week, and the only thing I'm tired of is you! *in the confessional when his voice becomes high-pitched as he whines* I knew my dream was a sign! My whole life, Felix has been better than me at everything; academics, sports, and yes, even personal grooming! *looks determined* Well not this time!

Alec: *annoyed* Enough with the touching family reunion! Start punching each other!

*The match-starting bell rings and the two cousins lunge at each other, punching and ducking. Only, they don't aim for the face*

Alix: Why are they just going with body hits? It's weird!

Adrien: *in the confessional holding a mirror* It is the family code, not the face.

Felix: *in the confessional, also with a mirror* Never the face.

—

Felix: Your technique is almost as embarrassing as the way your girlfriend with the unattractive personality burned you on national television… twice! *Adrien growls as he laughs*

Adrien: *fiercely lunges at his cousin* THAT'S for calling me Adri! *leaps over Felix to pummel him from behind* That's for always hogging the bathroom mirror!

*cut to everyone outside the ring's expressions, everyone shocked*

Adrien: And replacing my soap with a urinal cake!

*cut back into the ring, Adrien rapidly winding his arms for a giant punch*

Adrien: AND THIS... IS FOR CALLING ANY ASPECT OF MARINETTE UNNATRACTIVE! *he lunges for the final punch, sending Felix flying out of the ring, and raises one hand in victory*

—

*Alec turns on the TV, which turns out to be a clip of Marinette and Nathaniel making out and alternates between clips of them kissing. Marc gets angrier with each clip. The monitor shows what looks like one of Alya’s blogs*

Alex: Isn't it awesome? The producers found it on Alya’s Nathanette blog.

Marinette: Uh, Marc, remember, we're past this! We're friends again!

Marc: *Snarls* I guess I'm not as over it as I thought! This is going to hurt you more than it hurts me!

Marinette: Ah! *Dodges a punch*

Marc: That's for kissing my boyfriend!

Marinette: *Throws a punch* That's for him not being your boyfriend when he kissed me!

Nathaniel: They're fighting over me! *confessional* See? People don't fight over a good guy. Total bad guy right here! *A baby goat trots up to him* Aww!… *Realizes what he just did* Aww...

—

Alex: *notices someone missing* Wait a minute, where's Nino? *something explodes off screen*

Marinette: What the heck was that?!

*Alex pulls out his binoculars and looks through them.*

Alec: *gasps as he sees Playa Des Losers has exploded* MY COTTAGE!!!! *breaks down crying*

Luka: *Looks through the binoculars* You call that a cottage?! It was a mansion!

—

Alec: So many pictures of me! Gone! All gone!

Chef: We'll build you another cottage.

Luka: It was not a cottage!

—

Nick: *forcely perky* Hey, Adrien! So, I was kinda wondering, since there aren't any teams anymore, um, maybe someday you and I could work together on a challenge *Alejandro raises a suspicious eyebrow*, or something...? Uh, I mean, if you want? ...Maybe... *mimicks Nathaniel’s awkward laugh*

Adrien: Hmmm... Intriguing and unexpected... *smiles* Just the way I like to play it. *Grabs Nick’s hand and shakes it* Deal! I look forward to the day we work together.

—

Nick: Better watch your step, pal. Or is it Adri?

Adrien: Quite a warning coming from the guy who tampered with the votes.

Nick: So what? Who's gonna believe a model who’s dumped four girl over the sweet wittle artist?

Adrien: True, I’ve got a reputation. That's why I have procured a DVD full of evidence of you at your shiftiest. Your hours here are numbered, pal. Or should I say...Nick. *Nick threatens to break his wrist* Wait! There’s a saying! ¡Burros muertos no hablan!

Nick: ‘Dead donkeys don't talk’?

Alec: *laughs* Adrien "dead donkey"! *laughs*

—

Lila: This show just got 100% less beautiful! But I’m not the real villain, a greater evil is lurking!

Alec: *fake yawns* Boring! *presses the remote button and flushes Lila*

Lila: *to Marc while spinning around, getting flushed* The truth is in the art! It’s in the AAAARRRRRTTTTT!!!!

—

Alec: I am so bored! I miss my cottage!

Marc: You mean mansion? Anyway, I was trying to--

Alec: Did you know the soap here is made of soap? What am I, a peasant? And six-hundred thread count bed-sheets? It's like sleeping on sandpaper!

—

Lila: Of course Alec took my invincibility statue, who else?! You with your see-all cameras everywhere! Well WHATEVER! I am not the one going home tonight, that I promise you!

—

Alec: That's right! Instead of flushing Max, I'm sending him over to the villains’ side! *the heroes gasp*

*Nathaniel suddenly gasps and his bangs move off of his eyes again and laughs, Nick returning, before pushing his bangs back in place to look like Nathaniel*

Max: I'll find a way to help you, even from the villains’ side, I promise. *extends his hand*

Nick: *grips Max’s hand, grinning* Gee, thanks, pal.

—

Nick: *Pretending to be Nathaniel* Hi! I'm a wimpy little weirdo and everybody loves me!

—

Nick: Thanks again for bringing me to the finale. I know things have been-

Marc: I didn't do it for you! I did it for Nathaniel. And you can drop the act!

Nick: *Brushes his bangs aside* Oh, what a relief. Pretending to be that lame was really getting to me. What did you see in him?

Marc: I'll take lame Nathaniel over evil Nick any day.

Nick: Oh, Marc. Don't you get it yet? There’s no longer a choice. *whispers into Marc’s ear* Nathaniel is gone. And he’s never coming back. *evil laughter*

Marc: *Confessional* Is Nath really never coming back? No, that’s just what Nick wants me to believe… I hope.

—

Juleka: Hey! He's not Nathaniel. Remember that or he'll introduce you to a pool of lava.

Marc: Okay, right, I know that. I do.

*Meanwhile*

Chloé: How do we get across?

Nick: I'm not here to help you. You're here to help me. Figure it out.

Kim: Such bigger anger for a little man.

—

Alec: So, I'm bringing back 14 TD All-Stars to battle it out in the most dangerous, death-defying, $1,000,000 competition, ever! *A robot holds up the open case, where the wind blows a few bills away. Alec then addresses an incoming helicopter* and here they are now! From Revenge of the Island, Say hello to... *The door to the chopper reveals an apprehensive looking Nathaniel* Numerous Nathaniel! *A hand shoves Nathaniel off the chopper* AKA, Michael, Evie, Capri, and Might! *Nathaniel screams in terror as he continues to fall and then land in the water* Nathaniel’s boyfriend, pushover turned powerhouse, Marc!

Marc: NATH! *Jumps after him*

Alec: Athletic non-supporter, Kim!

Kim: You call that a dive? Watch this! *prepares to dive* Sha-ugh! *gets booted off by Chef’s foot*

Alec: Bubble-Boy brainiac, Max! *Chef holds Max by his shirt*

Max: This is highly illogical! *Chef tosses him out the door*

Alec: Gentle tree lover, Ivan!

Ivan: *Gets pushed out* Not cool!

Alec: Plucky little seamstress, Marinette! *Marimette holds to Chef’s leg until Chef throws her out. Chef walks back and grabs Alix* Ambitious skater, Alix, who dominated until her partner turned on her.

*Alix resists Chef shoving her out, and shoves him back*

Alix You're a dead man, Cataldi! *Chef body-slams her off the copter*

Alec: Cranky know-it-all CIT, Lila! *Chef walks out, carrying Lila by the ankle*

Lila: This is not in my contract! *Chef glares and drops her*

Alec: Chloé’s friend, Sabrina! *Chef carries Sabrina over his shoulders, and tosses her down*

Sabrina: *free-falling* That’s not all I aaaaaaam!

Alec: Broody bad boy, Luka!

Luka: *free-falling, not even looking like he cares* Quit calling me that!

Alec: Devious Diva, Chloé!

Chloé: *free-falling* I hate Aleeeec!

Alec: Loveable blonde, Rose!

Rose: *free-falling, flapping her arms* I'm flying! *stops flapping and screams*

Alec: Super fan, Alya! Total Drama's #1 blogger!

Alya: FOR NINO! *cannonballs, sending the other contestants scattering, and causing a slightly less massive splash*

Alec: *with a more malicious grin* Feral freakshow, Austin A!

*Chef drops a feral Auestin A by his blazer*

Contestants: What?

*Austin A plummets, but is then grabbed by the robot’s plunger*

Alec: *laughing* Kidding! *The robot retracts the plunger* No way is that guy coming back again. *snaps his fingers, causing the robot to fire off the plunger, as Austin A screams as he is rocketed to the other side of the island* Man, It's great to be back!

—

Nathaniel: *as Michael* There's a storm 'a coming! *then Evie* I'm scared! After all these years, he's going to return! *then Capri* Ayo, how we gonna stop this guy? *then Might* Hush it! Nath is waking up! *Wakes up as his normal self, looks around* Uh… huh, wuzzat? You guys say something?

#miraculous ladybug #miraculous #mlb incorrect quotes #total drama all stars

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aliveanddying · 2 years

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Last night I watched Blue Velvet (1986). I've spent the past hour watching explanation videos to see what people's analysis of the film would be and came across an interesting YouTube comment which states that the film is about Jeffery trying to make sense of childhood sexual abuse he endured at the hands of his parents. I'm not sure if I really fully agree, but I think there is definitely symbolism of childhood sexual abuse in the film.

What I actually wanted to talk about though was the fact that Lana Del Rey has a cover of the song Blue Velvet by Bobby Vinton on Born To Die - Paradise Edition. I didn't know it was a cover until I watched this movie last night, embarrassingly. As a brown woman, the reason why I've stuck by Lana over the years (throughout the racial weirdness, cultural appropriation and random bouts of being a little problematic) is because she is such a relatable artist for someone who has been through abuse. I don't like to speculate about people's lives but to me it seems like her music has multiple really heavy connotations of abuse. In fact, I'd probably say a lot of her music revolves around abuse, and her persona is one who is vulnerable, hurt and constantly trying to heal from abuse, constantly being shot down when she tries to stand up. I think a lot of women create music like this, but Lana really screams it in your face, and tells you about all of the secret feelings survivors have that we're not allowed to have in the public eye.

For instance, it's not okay for us to be attracted to our abuser, people who look like our abuser, or treat us how our abusers treated us, but sometimes we are. When I was 19, I seeked out a sugar daddy, and met a man who was 38 and spoke to him for about 8 months. I was attracted to him despite him not being physically attractive to me, despite him grooming me (and yes, you can be groomed at that age) and generally being a bit horny and sleazy. It's not okay for us to like being hurt by a lover, "he hit me and it felt like a kiss", but sometimes we do. I think I've written a little about how I used to ask my ex to hit and choke me during sex in a previous entry. It's not okay for us to constantly, unhealthily yearn for love, affection, attention, sex, and to be seen as beautiful, but sometimes we do. This is literally all I've written on this blog lol.

So while watching Dorothy sing Blue Velvet in the film, I felt the captivating sadness that I always felt when listening to Lana's version, the sadness of a woman who has been through the pain of abuse. Even before knowing what Frank does to Dorothy, as a survivor, you know another survivor just by looking at them. By hearing the quiver in their voice, or watching their eyelashes flutter as they periodically glance at the ground, where no one can stare back into their eyes and see what they really are. Seeing Dorothy's eyes zone in on Frank while singing, seeing her smile when he hits her, and seeing her ask Jeffery to hit her during sex doesn't make me think that she's just insane, or a broken woman. It makes me think that those are the moments when she feels the most frighteningly alive, the most terrifyingly present, feeling life sear her skin as her abusers brand her over and over again. Every time you see her outside of the abuse, she seems dazed and confused. It's scary, how on the nose her character is, like an exaggerated version of survivors' innermost feelings.

So when I think back to Lana Del Rey again, her cover of Blue Velvet seems closer to Dorothy's in the movie than the Bobby Vinton version. I think she took on the persona of or similar to Dorothy, a vulnerable woman, stuck in a dire situation in which she has an abuser. Blue Velvet has such a deep understanding of sadness, rich in quality like thick melted chocolate or molten gold, but delicate in essence like soft strands of hair that wisp over Dorothy's eyebrow or mesh curtains which fail keep the sunlight out of dark rooms, fail to hide the abuse that happens behind them. The lyrics twinkle over a blue sea of tears, longing and years of pain, idealising love lost but never forgotten. I think the idealism of love in this instance is more an idealism of abuse, and not in a way that shows the actual abuse as something good. It's to show that this is the only way she knows how to love, to serve, to please, to idolise her abuser because that's the only way she can understand him. He's a flawed man, with too many issues to count and she's his one and only, the one person in his world that he's shown his true self to. She's the only one in this world who knows how messed up he really is, and he's the only one that can give her what she craves, violence. Violence to soothe her confusion, violence that frames her life and intertwines with the very fiber of her being, violence that stamps out any semblance of love for herself which is so disgusting and grotesque that she can't look at herself in the mirror. Now if you replace the word violence with love instead, it seems to make things better, but as a survivor, I often misconstrue the two, because that's all I knew growing up.

Looking at Lana Del Rey's other music, it seems like there's a lot of that same idealism of a "flawed man", and a flawed relationship. I kind of look at her music as different stages of healing from abuse, and none of it is completely free from the confines of trauma. Again, I don't want to speculate about her life, especially as she hasn't publicly said anything about it, this is just my interpretation of the music she's put out. So yeah, I don't know if this one really made much sense but hopefully if anyone's reading this they get what I mean.

#Spotify

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celiaelise · 1 year

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Just watched Chainsaw Man, it was pretty good. Feels very Written By Men but 🤷🏻‍♀️🙄

I liked how efficient the characterization was! Like within one or two scenes of knowing a character, you'd have a pretty good grasp on what their deal was. The whole "we kill devils except for when we use their powers ourselves except for when we just straight up become them" thing is definitely intriguing! Obviously lots of room to explore there. I have questions about them representing different fears/scary things, mainly about what happens when they get killed?

It was funny how Hayakawa was like, "🙄OBVIOUSLY we kill every fiend, they're just the same as other devils, they're not like people at all, are you stupid?" only for there to be like five fiends on his personal team. And, "we don't talk to or make friends w devils, we ONLY violently murder them," only for everyone he knows, including himself, to have active business deals with them. Like, I get that we're doing the whole irony thing, here, but it just seems like that worldview would be a little difficult to maintain. Also the fact that he got mad at Denji for killing the guy TOO efficiently?? Again, I get that we are establishing the character and the world, but it was a little baffling imo. But I guess he also did jump Denji in an alley following their very first conversation for literally no reason.

(I tried really hard not to find it off-putting that Denji was groomed/sexually harassed/assaulted by almost every woman he worked with, because I'm pretty sure that wasn't the context intended by the story 😬)

Anyway, I get the "morally dubious gov agency that uses people, including children, like pawns as a means to their greater good-motivated ends" thing they're doing. I can dig it.

It was a little wild in the season finale when they were like "okay Division 4 is going to go in the building now", showed the four characters we've become acquainted with entering the building, and then were like, "okay here are the members of the Division", and started introducing four completely different characters. Like, okay, yeah, surprise reveal or whatever, but at least a hint that there was even something to reveal would've been nice? (I remember the comment at the dinner party, but that didn't register at all) I guess I also just don't get what is even narratively gained from that surprise. Like, "there are several other members of this group, who we haven't met yet", doesn't seem like that weighty of a reveal, or to big of a hint to drop. Maybe I just didn't follow something, though. I'm not great with fast-paced stuff even when it's in my native language, so 🤷🏻‍♀️😅

Normally stories like this bother me by throwing around trauma, violence, and murder so lightly, but I feel like this one does a really good job of being like, "these people are Fucked Up, their world does not look like ours and they do not function the way we do." And, like, everything annoying or frustrating about the story or characters is justified. That redhead is on a different level though lol.

I liked Power just as much as I thought I would! 😊 The duo she and Denji have become by the end of the season is really sweet. I was excepting to see Pochita much more than I actually did. Visually, I find a lot of the animation really cool, including the ending sequences. It feels like the artists really like the color orange/amber, which, as an Orange Appreciator, I can appreciate. I think the "suits with sneakers" look that everyone has going on is pretty cute, though it does get a little boring.

Honestly, I think my favorite arc was the hotel level 8 one? idk why but it was very interesting, and gratifying to see Denji get such a definitive win.

#chainsaw man #chainsaw man spoilers #obvs I haven't read the manga so pls no big spoilers if you respond to this 💕#by elise #i did kind of think Power's hair might've been pink- which I do think would be cooler!!!#(combination of seeing art w weird lighting and getting her confused with makima lol)#i just have a personal anti-blondness agenda lol #hmm maybe I'll do art of her w different hair colors #(probably not bc I never make art but it's interesting to think about)#i feel like every time i do one of these reviews/debriefs it's like completely incomprehensible but that's fine

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softcallofdutyimagines · 3 years

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Rating the Canon CoD husbands on who I would realistically allow the privilege of dating me, most to least likely

Some of y'all are about to get hurt if you read this, so be warned. All just my opinion, but it's opinion based on material from the games.

David Mason

Unproblematic king. He is literally just there. Just a normal guy with a bit of childhood baggage, but even then, that's fine bc who doesn't have that nowadays. He probably has a little PTSD from the military, but I can't hold that against him bc he's normally just so chill and fun. Also, considering he's the closest one on this list to our generation, you already know he's progressive and a big respecter of women

10/10 why can't he be real

Weaver

There is literally nothing wrong with this man. ALTHOUGH. He has desperation vibes and I feel like he's never had a gf in his life, so he probably doesn't know how to handle relationship issues and would either totally break down when he have a disagreement, or would get frustrated bc he doesn't know how to process his feelings and run away leaving the issue unresolved.

9/10, I love my wholesome, try hard good boy. He can marry me

Sims

Literally just the nicest guy and a normal person, even after all he's been through. He likes to talk and be chill from what I've gathered in the campaign, plus he has a sense of humor. Only real issue is he seems a touch dusty and I need a mans who can match my fashion sense.

8/10 he's not my type, but honestly I'd give him a chance bc he seems like a genuine guy

Hudson

If not for his wife Jenny, Hudson guaranteed has never had a girlfriend and probably has never even really had anyone express interest in him. As though that isn't red flag enough, he literally looks like a government drone from like the matrix or some shit and has zero personality to match. His hobbies probably include collecting stamps and working. However, he's pretty respectful and I fell like I can't blame him for having no personality given his job position.

7/10 he can talk to me, but I'll probably get tired of being the only one with a sense of humor and fun

Adler

Lmao. This man is a walking novelty and I would only talk to him for the pure experience of it I after got done laughing at his corny looking ass behind his back with my besties. He may have the style, but his personality is too extroverted for me and I feel like I'd be drained after an hour of social interaction with him. Also, he gives me Fuck boy vibes and I hate that

6/10 I feel like I'm not his type anyway, but if he can be chill then idk sure ig

Lazar

Honestly, if I saw him in public I'd probably be either really intimidated or really attracted. He is equal parts big scary man and lovable goof vibes. However, he has even worse desperation vibes then Weaver and I feel like he's just looking to smash. Also, don't like how he kept trying to link with Park after getting shut down repeatedly.

5/10 depends on which side of him I see first ig, but I'm betting no

Alex Mason

This man has obvious mental damage and is an absentee father on top of that. Whatever inkling of a nice or sweet personality he may have/or have had doesn't even come close to making that up in my book. I'd probably make like that one lady Weaver set him up with and fear for my life the whole time we're together and then pray I never meet him again

3/10 his issues aren't entirely his fault, but that's not my problem. Sorry.

Woods

Ha. Woods literally looks like a wild, rabid dog at all times, has little to no sense of personal grooming, and probably smells like sweat and bo. Not to mention he is a hardcore marine with so much childhood baggage, general trauma, and warfare PTSD, it would take a professional construction crew working all hours non stop to "fix" this man, let alone me. He would make no time for a relationship and probably only wants to smash anyway, and if he can't do that with whoever he picks up at the bar, he'd probably hire a prostitute. I would not let this man within 10 feet of my person, which is probably good anyway because I feel like he'd call me a fat bitch after I reject him.

2/10 if he got some serious therapy and a personal hygiene routine I'd maaaaaaybe consider

Peck

Literally a narcissist and almost guaranteed an emotional abuser, not to mention he literally looks like a dog and has thinning hair at 45. Yikes. Honestly would laugh in his face if he asked me out, would walk away, glance one more time over my shoulder for a last hearty laugh, and keep going.

0/10 literally would traumatize me worse then my ex, and that's saying something

#black ops cold war #call of duty #russell adler #frank woods #jason hudson #grigori weaver #lawrence sims #eleazar azoulay #lazar #william peck #alex mason #david mason #black ops 2

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evieshook · 7 years

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Can i maybe get some headcanons of Protective Mama! Evie and wedding day evie where people crash and attack the wedding which evie spent hours preparing for (like Jasmine andAlladin's wedding) and be very angry, scary and hARSH AND yeah it can be hevie, im fine w/ that also like harry looking at her fighting for her child or her wedding and be like "I love that woman" and evie being like yeah yeah i know thats why we're here(cuz they have a child or they r getting wed) sorry for the trouble,thx

so sorry for the long wait anon, and of course you may! it’s no trouble at all :) i haven’t written headcanons in a while, so i might be a little rusty haha

i’ll be doing the protective mama!evie + wedding day!evie to make it easier, and in this case i’ll be using my oc hevie child, hayden (but you can decide your own if that’s easier). hopefully this is what you wanted though.

when evie learns that her firstborn, her beloved hayden, is getting married, she’s more than ecstatic. it takes a while to convince harry to come around, since she is his only daughter and his baby girl after all, but he does after giving her groom-to-be a good talking to (with help of his hook).

hayden doesn’t need to ask evie for help, because she knows her mother has already had some wedding plans stored from ages ago (the princess may as well have expanded into wedding planning as part of her designer career) and decides to let her take the reins, because honestly she’d rather spend her time sailing than wedding planning.

evie sets the wedding on a royal ship, similar to her own wedding to harry, but decides to make it more hayden’s style which is less extravagant and a little more simplistic. she designs and creates her daughter’s wedding gown as well as the bridesmaid dresses herself, with there being a touch of red and blue.

while evie has spent hours on end tirelessly working on getting everything ready, it is harry’s job to make sure she doesn’t overwork herself because she has a bad tendency to. she gets a lot more stressed and snappy as the wedding comes around (much like their own) and harry becomes her stress ball, the pirate on hand to shield everyone from the princess’ snappish behaviour as he is the only one who can truly soothe her.

when the wedding finally comes around, strange things start happening. despite her endless efforts to achieve perfection, small things start going wrong which begins stressing her out. no one is aware that this is all a ploy by some of the sea three’s old enemies who have planned to crash the wedding.

evie, with help of harry and the rest of the gang, manage to smooth out the situation and things run smoothly until hayden is at the end of the aisle and ready to say her vows.

harry’s old enemies decide to gatecrash the wedding, swinging onto the ship with swords on hand as they terrorise the guests. while everyone is screaming, the vks get into position with everyone brandishing their own swords (because neither uma nor lonnie leave home without a fair set of swords with them) in order to fight them.

evie is angry that everything is ruined, their enemies having smashed the cake and destroyed all her painstaking decorations, but her true fury shows when she sees her daughter getting cornered by three pirates.

she knows she can handle them herself, having watching the girl be personally trained by harry when she learned how to walk, but evie sees red and practically storms to where hayden is cornered.

“not my daughter, you bastards!”

she manages to block a blow that was coming for hayden, and is able to take on the three at one time because of her rush of adrenaline and her anger and overprotectiveness fuelling her. all the years training with harry has paid off.

harry, who has finished up with his own fight, is able to watch as his wife confidently takes on the three, a proud smile on his face. he has taught his princess well.

“i love that woman.”

evie also uses a little spell that ties them all up after they’re all knocked out, and she puts everyone else to clean up duty in order to salvage what was rest of the wedding.

harry walks up to her with an approving whistle, and while evie rolls her eyes she feels sort of relieved. hayden also engulfs her mother in a proud hug, and while evie apologizes for the destruction of her wedding, she doesn’t really mind, stating that it was quite the adventure and the best way of showcasing to her groom what he would be dealing with should he piss evie off in the slightest.

#hevie #harry x evie #descendants #harry hook #evie descendants #he: headcanons #m: headcanons #request filled #anon #one line was inspired by molly weasley haha #mine

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