#while pretending to be for cult survivors lol

[troonwolf]

thank you for speaking up about the cult tactics used in the pro endo community. even though i Was mostly syscourse unaligned leaning anti, the pro endo community gave me a really bad vibe. seeing a lot of shit they say screamed “cult” to me too but i didn’t feel comfortable enough calling it out because i’m not a cult survivor and i don’t know a lot about cults. i was also never pro endo so it’s not like i could speak from personal experience either. so i kind of brushed off my gut reaction and told myself i’m overreacting about something i don’t know a lot about. so i’m glad to know more now and know that the pro endo community does harm beyond what i even initially thought. i’m definitely more anti endo now because the pro endo community is absolutely the anti vaxers of the neurodivergent community. also notice how many of them support the demedicalization of autism too. idk if you remember that but i’m referencing specifically the time a few months ago when some prominent pro endo bloggers were jumping down the throats of autistic anti endos because they called their autism a disability.

Ty for your input anon! Interesting to read other folks perspectives and experiences on all this.

The funny thing is I literally only started talking about how I myself am a cult survivor because everytime I try to talk about cults in the system community, people have this knee-jerk reaction of having to respond to you with essays on how unless you're a cult survivor, you shouldn't be talking about cults.

Now first off that's obviously not true and pretty stupid. Tons of academic professionals and researchers and etc who are involved in widening our understanding of cults, were not themselves victims of cults. That's like saying I can't talk about the black plague because I wasn't there.

But literally just to make people stop having that response to me I was like welp guess I'm gonna have to talk about specific details of my trauma of being lured into a doomsday bunker in the mountains by my mother even tho both sides of this debate are constantly talking about how we shouldn't pressure people to have to talk about or reveal their trauma.

The idea of cults and cult victims have a weird status of reverence in the community, we're almost treated like a mythological creature. "Oh no, don't talk about cults! There might be a...*whispers* cult victim here...." It's very very bizarre.

Cults are an age-old phenomenon with tons of research put behind them. We actually know a fucking lot about cults. Saying you need to have been in one to be able to understand them is ridiculous.

Comparing this to other things: you don't need to have been abused as a child to have a good understanding of child abuse. We have a pretty informed understanding of what child abuse is and how it functions by this point. You can still call something out as being child abuse without having experienced it yourself.

With that said I'm glad there are people who understand my point, but honestly after this experience I've concluded both sides of the anti/endo discourse are a bunch of clowns who just want a tumblr pvp social club. People are involved literally just to be part of the community, whether anti or endo. Folks actual reasons for being against endos is dumb shit like "they're just dumb teenagers who don't know what they're doing", when if that's really the case then why are you "anti" in the first place? Idc what dumb teenagers are doing, why do you?

I hate endos because they cause harm but most people in this discourse legitimately seem like they're just anti-endos because they think it's cringe and want to be a cool tumblr hater.

#anti endo #syscourse #endo cult #also peoples response to me finally dumping my trauma after being accused of not knowing what I'm talking about over and over #was just to then ignore my existence and vague me #while pretending to be for cult survivors lol #this community is genuinely very full of shit #like just cliquey mean girl shit because no one actually believes in what they're saying #they just want to have a blog where they're a cool tumblr hater or wtfever #also I don't like how the community treats us cult survivors like we are delicate fucking flowers #that cant even skim by a post about cults #or we cant have an intellectual objective discussion on cults #because we are just so weak and fragile yknow :((((((((((( #we need them to protect us from stuff like having thoughts and sharing opinions :((((( #it is literally just ''survivors I agree with'' vs ''survivors I disagree with and therefore don't exist''

[whetstonefires]

Whether Wanda is actually a mutant now is unclear but the Krakoans claim she isn't, call her The Pretender, and basically portray her as the Devil when educating their children. I think at one point it was suggested that Tommy is basically a reality warper like Billy, except he's instinctively warping space and time to give himself superspeed.

I knew some of that!

And honestly I have Some Opinions about the way the current mutant society interacts with Wanda conceptually--like, it makes sense there’s a serious grudge there, but the fact that there’s intense cultural pressure to abhor her for something she did in the midst of a mental breakdown after intense manipulation

and at the same time to ignore the vast number of horrific abuses and murders that people like Apocalypse and Mr. Sinister have committed freely while of sound mind

makes me super uncomfy.

Like. Magneto is one of the people running this whole shebang. Any of you folks know why M-Day happened? Cuz that dude harnessed Wanda’s powers (while believing her to be his daughter--I’ve heard she isn’t anymore which is dumb ngl) to create his own reality! And you know what it was? Fucking fascist ethnostate with him at the top.

Which, I mean, incredibly uncomfortable writing choice to make with your Holocaust Survivor, was this a thinly-veiled jab at Israel, i’m guessing the X-Men community has already talked all of this to death but I’m over here on the margins just vaguely following along lol.

Anyway the way they talk about Wanda on Krakoa gets them at least 20 Cult Points and lowers Magneto in my esteem because I bet he helped set it up.

Also I hate New Charles with his terrible helmet that makes him look like Evil Reed Richards. I couldn’t fit that into the last post but it’s true. He gives me a shiver every time he appears and I’m sure it’s intentional, they wouldn’t give him such predatory body language if I wasn’t meant to fear him but egad do I hate the man.

Also what does Krakoa think about the Cotati invasion? I saw recently the Hordeculture are still alive which is tbh surprising, I assume they will also have Strong Opinions on the Cotati, why is everything magic plants lately huh? And robots but that’s normal.

#marvel comics #hoc est meum #less well-organized rant with more salt #a nonny mouse #ask #antisemitism #crack-oa #red witch

[being-worthy]

The Last of Us Part II – Adding my two cents to the game

Just so we’re clear, let’s establish a few things first:

MAJOR TLOU II SPOILERS AHEAD!!

I also spoiled myself ahead because I needed to know what would happen to Joel and Ellie… and the ending as well.

I’ve played the first one. I liked how it ended and totally support the ending!

I haven’t played the 2nd part but I’m watching the playthrough on YouTube in small doses. My heart can’t take much of it at once lol (and being poor and paying of debt for a loved one is no fun because I don’t have much money to spend on myself).

Right now, I’m at the part where Joel goes with Ellie to the museum for her birthday – it’s so cute and fatherly and my heart can’t take how bittersweet this is …

The 2nd part was rushed and has some bugs that could’ve been avoided, whether you like it or not. That’s a fact and we’re here for the facts not the truth (if you want the truth join a philosophy course).

The parts with Abby are too long, more than what they should’ve been and her vengeance is 💩.

English is not being my first language but I do my best (that’s all I can do).

I’m listening to Bryan Adams and Richard Max while writing this because I’m still not over Joel…

You may voice your opinion but remember this is my space! Be respectful at all times and absolute no hate here!

The first part ended with Joel bringing an unconscious Ellie to the hospital where the last Fireflies are, she almost drowned and he had to perform CPR on her. He’s rendered unconscious too and wakes up on a hospital bed with Marlene and Ethan (the guy who hit Joel in the head with the butt of his rifle) in the room.

That’s when he starts asking where Ellie is and Marlene informs him that she’s not his problem anymore and being prepped for surgery. Here, we need to note the following things: Marlene had sworn to Ellie’s mother to protect and to keep her from harm’s way but TAKES the decision to practically sentence her to death and yeah, she gives a speech that it’s not easy for her either yada yada yada but it’s all bs. The reason why is because:

a)     making a decision refers more to the process and is something that takes time, while taking a decision is the act of deciding something that happens in an instant. Ultimately, Marlene decides for HER!! What about ‘my body, my decision’? Or in this case ‘her body, her decision’? It doesn’t matter if it’s related to an abortion or having your skull opened, the same principle should be applied!

She even says to Joel ‘because this isn’t about me. Or even her. There is no other choice here’. – Firstly, there’s always another choice! Secondly, Joel replies to her saying ‘yeah, you keep telling yourself that bullshit’ and he’s right, it’s total and utter bullshit. Even later on, when he’s carrying Ellie into the parking lot (I believe it was a parking lot), he tells her ‘that ain’t for you to decide’. Again, he’s right. It isn’t Marlene’s decision nor his but Ellie is still unconscious, so what do you want to do? Let them butcher her open? He crossed with her through half the country and ended up caring profoundly for her – she became like a daughter to him. He doesn’t have an on and off switch to turn off his feelings towards Ellie. Moreover, do tell me, if you’d like a doctor or someone else TAKE such a decision for you, instead of waiting for you to wake up and then tell you about the procedure and what this will entail. I get freaking furious whenever someone takes a decision for me or without asking me first.

b)     Neither she nor the doctor wait for Ellie to regain consciousness and since she’s unconscious, they see it as the perfect importunity to just go ahead and rummage in her brain to see if there’s something that could help them developing a vaccine or a cure.

c)     That’s another thing. They had zero guarantees, not even a 0.1 percentage of probability that they’d find something – nothing, nada, zilch. Just a hunch and maybe in an apocalyptic world for some people this might be enough but then why not wait until she wakes up and tell her ‘we don’t know for sure if your immunity will help us finding a cure or a vaccine. So that’s why we need to open your skull and see what makes you immune which ultimately, will kill you’ (in some nicer words though lol). Because they know she might not fully agree with it and they give a sh*t about what she thinks/wants and have that narrow military/cult mindset of ‘a sacrifice for the greater good’ and/or wouldn’t care either way because she’s a kid. I’m no fan of sacrificing one or a dozen people to save billions. If we can’t save them all or at least try our damn hardest, then we’re doing something terribly wrong! Also, she’s a freaking kid!! She hasn’t seen much and has her whole life ahead, doesn’t matter if it’s in the apocalypse. The thought that they’re willing to sacrifice her, a kid, without batting an eye shows me that all Fireflies are terrorists.

d)     Now to the doctor (the one with the scalpel) – according to the internet this guy was Abby’s father and his murder was why she tortured and slaughtered Joel. First things first, every doctor has to take on a Hippocratic oath. There are many different variations but they all come from an old one that states the following:

… I will apply dietetic measures for the benefit of the sick according to my ability and judgment; I will keep them from harm and injustice.

I will neither give a deadly drug to anybody if asked for it, nor will I make a suggestion to this effect. Similarly, I will not give to a woman an abortive remedy. In purity and holiness, I will guard my life and my art.

I will not use the knife, not even on sufferers from stone, but will withdraw in favour of such men as are engaged in this work.

Whatever houses I may visit, I will come for the benefit of the sick, remaining free of all intentional injustice, of all mischief and in particular of sexual relations with both female and male persons, be they free or slaves.

… If I fulfil this oath and do not violate it, may it be granted to me to enjoy life and art, being honoured with fame among all men for all time to come; if I transgress it and swear falsely, may the opposite of all this be my lot.

The doctor doesn’t keep her from harm or injustice, he isn’t even there for her well-being, only to see how her brain ticks. So, that immense violation of his oath doesn’t make him a doctor anymore but a BUTCHER and don’t come to me with ‘but it’s the apocalypse or it’s for the greater good blah blah blah’, then how better are we compared to rapists and people who murder out of fun? If we throw our principles out of the window just because it’s the apocalypse and/or it’s for the greater good, then with all due respect we all should just go ahead and jump from a building and burn in hell.

e)     I got to the part where Joel and Ellie went to the museum for her birthday and at the end there’s a graffiti that says ‘liars’ with the fireflies’ symbol above. Even at the end, their own members saw that they Fireflies were only a bunch full of hot air and nothing else. They ended up being terrorists and forgot what they once stood and fought for.

So, taking all this into consideration - who wouldn’t have saved her? And yes, Joel saves her out of selfishness, so what? True, that he didn’t tell her the truth either, but can you resent him for this? He’d have to tell her that Marlene betrayed her, betrayed her trust and her mother’s trust in her and was willing to let her die and let her body being violated (rape is not the only way to violate someone’s body – FYI). This would have impacted Ellie’s state of mind too. She’d have ended up resenting Marlene and the Fireflies or worse. She had gone through so much already and didn’t need more on her plate. So, he spared her that betrayal and resentment.

Now let’s talk a bit more about Joel. Joel is no saint or hero but no villain either. He’s just a man who was willing to doom the whole already-damned world to protect the girl he adopted. He does what he needs in order to survive but within some reason and hasn’t lost his humanity (it’s just deeply hidden in him), he’s a person trying to survive. He tortures people - yes, but only to get information and makes sure to end them quickly afterwards. I agree that one of the main things you’ve to do during such times, is to adapt or you’ll die or worse. In the 1st part he’s rough, tough, strong, stubborn, resilient, experienced in the world he lives in and wary of strangers (just remember that scene on the highway with the stranger pretending to be hurt and Joel knew from the moment he saw him that it was a trap), someone you don’t want to mess with, etc. On the other hand, there’s this other side of him where he teaches Ellie to swim, tries to joke with her, to play the guitar, takes her to beautiful places, he takes her to a museum with dinosaurs and stuff from space, that proves he’s capable for carrying deeply for someone, in this case Ellie, and don’t get me started on the gift he gives her when they’re in the space capsule (!!), and so on. Ellie and Joel have this great dynamic. Then in the 2nd part, they made him to be so trustworthy toward a young unknown girl, tells her even their REAL names, like he literally says ‘my name’s Joel and that’s my brother Tommy. We live further down’. Dude, why don’t you just go walking around with a banner around your neck stating who you are to the whole freaking world. At some point he even said the name of their home (Jackson)!’ - WHAT THE HOLY F*CK?! He even offered her to go with them and take her to their home and give her supplies. Then, even BLINDLY and WITHOUT ANY WARINESS follows her to a place with an unknown sized group, where he and Tommy don’t know anyone - HOLY FREAKING HELL?! It’s not like it could be a trap, I mean it’s completely normal that there are many survivors camping up in the mountains in the middle of a snow blizzard, it’s the perfect season for doing that ¬¬. We’re living in times were everyone is kind to each other… I just don’t get it. This behaviour change is too radical and old habits die hard, especially ones acquired and used for decades!! That’s a big flaw from Naughty Dog regarding Joel. They portrayed him as someone stupid (sorry Joel but it’s true), sloppy, too soft, etc. He’s older and fatherlier with Ellie all fine and good, but he’d still be very cautious toward outsiders, particularly when they outnumber him!! It’s true that at some point we’ll have to be more trustworthy toward others in order to try and reestablish society or something close to it but you’d still be wary and wouldn’t take them right to your home first thing!! I had also into consideration that they were being chased by a horde of runners and clickers and their options where limited but still!

In some games the death of an important and primary character is sometimes essential. TLOU II is one of them because this was necessary for Ellie to grown and learn more about herself, the world she lives in, among others but Joel deserved way better than what he got! I feel for Tommy too, he didn’t deserve to split up with Maria or lose an eye but I believe the reason as to why he became obsessed with avenging Joel was because he already thinks he failed him in the past already, either when Sarah died, or when he joined the Fireflies and Joel wasn’t happy about it, or when they blindly trusted Abby and her friends.

Before I start with Abby, we need to establish something else first: revenge is about retaliation; justice is about restoring balance. The motive of revenge has mostly to do with expressing rage, hatred, or spite. It’s a protest or payback, and its foremost intent is to harm. And because it’s so impassioned, it’s typically disproportionate to the original injury—meaning that it usually can’t be viewed as just. The punishment may fit the crime, but it’s often an exaggerated response to another’s perceived offense. Nevertheless, I do believe that justice comes from vengeance but that type of justice only breeds more vengeance, and this is what Abby essentially does, avenge her father (even though I believe he lost his way and became unscrupulous) and ends up being capable to live with herself with little to no trouble after what she did to Joel, after repeatedly hitting him over and over and over again with a golf club, and forcing Ellie to watch the last bit. Abby and a bunch of others, who were also aware of her secretive plans, travel thousands of miles just to find Joel and brutalise him and massacre him. That scene was really brutal. But at some point both Abby and Ellie have to realise that vengeance is not the answer and if everyone keeps coming back seeking vengeance, then they’ll move around in a vicious circle until someone decides to forgive because killing like this not only hurts themselves, but also those they love and love them.

I don’t see the WLF as a whole as someone who deserves sympathy. They’re quite similar to the Fireflies who maybe at some point had noble goals (or almost) but ended up strayed from their path. They loot and kill everyone they see, no questions asked (much like the police these days in our world), even if they’re just passing by and aren’t affiliated to any group and just want to survive.

The ending of TLOU II couldn’t have been better. Ellie was happy with Dina and the baby but deep down she knew she didn’t close the chapter with Joel’s murder. Abby, and knew that at some point, she’d have to revisit that part to close it entirely. Her leaving with Tommy was the right decision, even if Dina wouldn’t/couldn’t fully understand why and I feel sad for Maria too but I strongly believe that she’ll return - whether or not Dina will wait for her is another story.

This is all I’ve to add. I’ve been sitting her for about 5+ hours writing this because I wanted to put my perspective of this masterpiece out there and show people that the game is still great.

Let me know your thoughts!!

#the last of us #the last of us 2 #tlou #tlou2 #tlou2 spoilers #tlou joel #tlou ellie #the last of us 2 spoilers #joel miller #ellie williams #tlou abby

[strangefellows]

I got bored and needed a decent reference for my Dishonored OCs, lol.

Summaries are below:

Sasha Zimov (center): Captain of The Whalesong. Is only 16, but pretends she’s 21 (her crew knows this and doesn’t care). Was an orphan forced to work as a scullery maid in a Samara brothel (her mother was a courtesan there, died of illness). When she was ten, the mistress sold her to a band of expeditioners en route to Pandyssia for 60 coins -- they planned to use her as a miner’s canary of sorts, and as such treated her badly to say the least during the voyage there. She will never tell anyone what happened when they got to Pandyssia, but safe to say she came out of there the only survivor with a Mark burned into her left hand. She proceeded to steal the expeditioners’ ship, The Jeweled Hagfish, rename it in honor of her savior, and start making a name for herself as a smuggler. She sees her mark and her magic as more of a good luck charm than a power to use freely, and tries not to rely on it too much.

Benjamin Conmara (far left): First mate of The Whalesong. Halfway into his forties, but fights and drinks like a man half that age. A former Whaler, Ben was a skinny kid from Morley that slipped onto a whaling ship and lied about his age to get work, only to be kicked off in Dunwall. He found Daud, or Daud found him, and he was deeply loyal to the man ever since. One of the last to leave after Daud vanished, he ended up trying to drink himself into a grave in Dabokva -- until he met a tiny little scrap of a girl with the same mark on her hand as his old Boss, and she dragged him into working with her. He doesn’t mind so much; it’s good to feel useful again.

Fiona Hadley (left): Ship’s doctor and cook on The Whalesong. Early to mid thirties, but she looks younger and probably always will. The bastard daughter of a Serkonan maid and a noble from Gristol, Fiona was taken away from her mother and adopted into the Hadley household. Of course, being surrounded by arrogant nobles who hated her took a toll, and when she met a charismatic and beautiful woman named Delilah, she took up the offer. She stayed with the Brigmore coven -- happy and content to have somewhere to be free -- until she realized she didn’t want what Delilah was really after. She fled back to Karnaca, working as a cook in a noble house, but her taste for freedom led her back to the docks one day and the scent of magic led her to The Whalesong. She brews potions and makes bonecharms for the crew, treating their hurts and making sure they all eat right -- and Void help the person who tries to take this family away from her.

Cillian Donohue (right): Ship’s navigator (and general ship caretaker) on The Whalesong. Late teens, but acts several years older. When Cillian was little, his single mother was arrested for heresy -- possession of bone charms and the like. Perhaps because of this, he was marked by the Abbey, and when he was twelve they ‘recruited’ him to be an Overseer. After several years of the unspeakable training, he fled...and fled right onto the deck of The Whalesong, where the crew immediately took him in. He’s shy and traumatized to be sure, and still sometimes stumbles back into what the Abbey beat into him, but he really wants to be a part of the crew, and tries very hard to move past his trauma.

Simon Disman (far right): Ship’s mechanic and resident librarian (of sorts) on The Whalesong. Early thirties, though he looks older. Product of a distant, neglectful family, Simon was unhealthily attached to his elder brother -- and despite being accepted into the Philosopher’s Academy, he followed his brother to Shindaerey and the Cult of the Outsider. While his brother was obsessed with the power he could gain, Simon was simply both naively following his only real family and deeply curious as to the knowledge hidden in the cult’s library. This curiosity and naivete kept him in the cult even after his body began to harden into stone, but not even that could save him from his brother abandoning him to the Overseers in a raid. After several years of ‘interrogation’ -- including Simon losing his arm and the sight in his eye in the Overseers ‘cleansing’ of his stone parts -- Simon faked his death to escape them, and barely managed to make it out of there with his life. The crew of The Whalesong found him and took him in, and after he recovered, he uses his knowledge to keep the ship up and running, and to advise the others. He regrets his time in the cult -- mostly because hindsight is 20/20 -- and hopes to make up for it by helping some people who aren’t the Extra-Crazy sort of heretics.

#dishonoredblogging #my ocs #shit sara did