#wildest thing that happened on the server i shit you not

[shuttershocky]

this overwatch 2 shit has GOT to be illegal right? I mean, they sold the game on the promise of PvE and now they cancel it. This better earn them a false advertising charge

And the wildest part is that you can't even play Overwatch 1 anymore.

Anyone who's followed this blog long enough has probably seen me post a rant about how terrible video games are at media preservation, and how we should preserve games (even ones we don't like) to be playable in some manner long after the developers take the servers offline because games are art and deserve to be able to be experienced by the future long after they've been discarded by their makers as a product.

You can't do that anymore with Overwatch 1, a game that wasn't even free to play.

People paid 40$ in 2016, 60$ if they went for the deluxe edition, to play Overwatch. New heroes, maps, etc were promised to come as free updates, instantly accessible for anyone to play without grinding or microtransactions (though there were mtx for cosmetics) and that the game would be supported for many years.

This was one of the many reasons why Overwatch back then absorbed a large part of TF2's playerbase: TF2 had been chugging along since 2007, at the 8-9 year point its updates were winding down and people have accepted it was finally hitting the end of tis life, and were looking for a new cartoon team shooter that would last for years. OW was not TF2's successor and was never intended to be, but that promise of many years of free support was a major part of why people gave it a chance just the same.

And then just 3 years later in 2019 they announced Overwatch 2, a game that looked really, really similar to Overwatch 1, except it was going to have the actual story missions via PvE mode that Overwatch 1 didn't have. They said there would be enough new things to justify the '2', and that people who bought Overwatch 1 need not worry about their investment in the first game.

And then it turned out what they meant by that was that they were killing Overwatch 1 by closing its servers, forcing everyone to move over to Overwatch 2, a Free to Play game where you had to grind to unlock the new heroes (people who bought OW1 instantly had the new hero unlocked but come on), was chock full of the usual Free to Play engagement mechanics, and changed the 6v6 format to 5v5, if you had a full squad of friends before, you had to tell one guy to get fucked.

I think the worst part was that when people were understandably angry that Overwatch 2's actual changes from the original were almost all monetization based, games journalists that pressed Blizzard on why players now had to grind a battlepass for heroes, which Overwatch 1 had always given for free, were met with a "well, heroes are the strongest engagement point for our players" type of deflection where they didn't even try to hide their reasons behind something respectable.

Now they're announcing that OW2's PvE mode, the whole (public) reason they made OW2 a sequel instead of an update to OW1, isn't even happening anymore, and Overwatch 1's original 6v6 remains dead and inaccessible.

I didn't like Overwatch 1. I was really hyped for it when it came out, but found myself really disliking the gameplay (especially on its map design which I thought was terrible) which only worsened with its creative and balancing direction until I lost interest in only a few weeks.

Still, killing OW1 to force all players to move to OW2's free to play model was inexcusable. All art must be preserved in some manner, even ones we don't think are good enough to be worth preserving. Overwatch in particular was so massive in 2016-2018 that to kill it is to make inaccessible the source material of a kajillion other pieces of art from those years.

[thebroccolination]

Oh my goddess...Singto is back in gmmtv...!!!!!!

HE SURE IS, ANON!!!

THE HANDSOMEST MAN IN GMMTV HAS RETURNED TO HIS THRONE!

I HAVE A LOT TO SAY LET'S BEGIN.

FIRST: I'M SO HAPPY. ;____;

I CASUALLY OPENED INSTAGRAM WHEN I WOKE UP A FEW HOURS AGO, LOOKED AT KRIST'S AND BOUN'S STORIES AS USUAL, AND THEN SINGTO'S KICKED ME IN THE SOUL AND IT HAS YET TO COME BACK TO ME.

AND LIKE.

OKAY.

HANG ON!!!

I NEED THE SONG OF MY PEOPLE!!!

OKAY.

BETTER.

NOW!!!

There have been signs for months, especially from Kit, that they'll have a series this year, but I didn't expect Singto to fully come back to GMMTV! So I'm in a daze of pure joy. The SHEER NUMBER of times my friends and I have been like, "SINGTO JUST COME BACK AND WE'LL PRETEND YOU NEVER LEFT," so now I fully plan on doing so.

Singto left? When?

Never, that's when.

LIKE.

LET ME WALK YOU THROUGH JUST A FEW OF MY POSTS ON MY DISCORD SERVER FROM THE PAST FEW MONTHS SO YOU CAN ENJOY THE JOURNEY WITH ME:

Some days, I'd just go through old photos and reminisce.

Other days, I'd have feelings.

And make academic observations of past occurrences.

I HAVE BEEN ASKING FOR SOTUS 3 SINCE 2020 I DESERVE THIS

AND PERAYA WHO HAVE BEEN HERE SINCE 2017 AND BEFORE HAVE BEEN ASKING FOR IT EVEN LONGER

BUT I'M GETTING AHEAD OF MYSELF

THEN THEY HUNG OUT IN EARLY JANUARY (WITH GAWIN!!! BECAUSE FUCK ALL THE MISERABLE PEOPLE IN THIS FANDOM WHO CAN'T LET ANYONE ENJOY MORE THAN ONE THING AND GENUINELY RUIN THE EXPERIENCE FOR OTHERS!!!)

AND THEY TRENDED BASED ON THAT ONE HANGOUT SESH

THERE WERE FURTHER SIGNS!!!

THEN KRIST AND SINGTO ACTUALLY INTERACTED ON TWITTER, WHICH HADN'T HAPPENED IN, I SHIT YOU NOT, ALMOST FOUR YEARS

OH AND SPEAKING OF THEM INTERACTING ON TWITTER

WE ARE FED

AND EVEN WILDER, SINGTO IS NOW UNDER KRIST'S MANAGER, YUI

For those who don't know, this is massive because as long as they've been with GMMTV, Krist and Singto always had separate managers. Krist with Yui, Singto with Jane (who has had cameos in some of Singto's series, maybe most famously the guy at their office cafe in SOTUS S).

I've heard TayNew also went under one manager recently, so I think it was likely a condition of Singto's return to GMMTV that he sign under Yui. Which is wild because these managers do what we'd consider in the States to be the work of agents, so they have a major contribution to what happens in their artists' careers.

In my wildest fantasies I never imagined Yui as Singto's manager. I love Jane, but wow.

AND PERHAPS MY FAVORITE THING OF ALL!!!

I HAVE BEEN JOKING ABOUT THIS FOR AGES AND HAVE A #THROUPLE CHANNEL ON MY SERVER BECAUSE I DON'T CARE I LOVE ALL THREE OF THEM

AND THEN KRIST PERAWAT WENT AHEAD AND SAID THIS:

MY SON SAID, "SURE FINE AS LONG AS Y'ALL DON'T KILL EACH OTHER."

KRIST WANTS ALL HIS BOYFRIENDS

NOW, LET'S OPEN SPECULATION FOR WHAT KRISTSINGTO'S COMEBACK SERIES WILL BE

I'M SO HAPPY

I GENUINELY HAVEN'T PROCESSED IT YET

:')

TIME TO WRITE FIC ABOUT IT

#singto prachaya #krist perawat #kristsingto #kristsingto comeback #i think i'll be using that tag all year :D #god i'm so happy #i missed them so much #also like #i hoped all along that this is why they separated gawinkrist #it didn't make sense when they were developing a fairly strong fanbase on the heels of a fantastic series #i figured they were in talks to have singto do a series with kit #but i never let myself hope that he'd come back :') #i still hope gawinkrist can make music together #i think the pair system is fine but not if it excludes them entirely from working with others #aaaaaaa he's back he's home singto my beautiful perfect relatable mess #he's been missed :')

[icyhotheartwritings]

OKAY SO

At the very start of the season, Docm77 built a world-eater to blast a 500 x 500 block hole right down to bedrock to use as space for his farms and base, called the Perimeter. The Perimeter is right next to where Grian, MumboJumbo, and GoodTimesWithScar settled their own bases. This is all setup for one of the wildest prank wars in Hermitcraft history.

It all started because Grian didn’t want to finish the back of his base. He didn’t want to finish it so bad that GeminiTay, ImpulseSV, and Scar held an intervention to get him to finish it, that he PROMPTLY managed to distract Scar from and they both raced off next door to see Doc’s latest game-defying contraption - a redstone tunnel bore in the wall of the Perimeter. That they managed to blow up. They did their best to rebuild it, but these two are builders and not redstoners and therefore had No Idea how to do that, so they just left a little apology present and got the fuck out of dodge.

Unfortunately for them Doc doesn’t do apology presents too well! So he fired back by setting a trap for Grian that blew up Mumbo’s front door (I still don’t know whether or not that was intentional or a slight misfire), and managed to hang DOZENS of wither skulls (you know, the ones the wither shoots out of its heads?? the exploding ones?? yeah those) in midair over the main square of Scar’s theme park.

So now that there’s three wronged parties (two perpetrators and an innocent bystander), they got together to form The Buttercups to band together and fight the goat. Grian egged the Perimeter with hundreds of chickens, they built a cute little hippie camp on the edge of the Perimeter, Doc made flying butterflies to blow up Grian and Mumbo’s bases, both parties made giant robots to fight each other, Doc enlisted Rendog to help spy on the Buttercups by building a secret room under their camp and stuffing sniffers in there, the Buttercups graffitied the Perimeter with a goddamn Live Laugh Love sign, Doc tore it down and replaced it with a trapped Grind Optimize Automate Thrive (G. O. A. T., if you notice) sign that ended up blowing up their camp and all the sniffers underneath, at some point Doc also covered the Buttercup’s bases with hundreds of duped dragon eggs but I can’t remember when that happened in the timeline, and then like half of the involved parties went on vacation.

Grian came back first and he had the brilliant (“bRiLlIaNt”) idea to just. Cover the entire Perimeter. All 250,000 blocks of it. But not in one flat plane of dirt, no no NO. This man is a BUILDER. And Scar is a builder too. These motherfuckers TERRAFORMED it. Planted trees and everything. But since it was a race against the clock to beat Doc getting back on the server, they hijacked the weekly Hermitcraft meeting to be all “hey anyone wanna help us cover the Perimeter?” AND THEY GOT LIKE SEVEN PEOPLE TO HELP. I CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH THAT LITERALLY NOBODY EXCEPT MUMBO, GRIAN, SCAR, REN, AND DOC WERE EVER INVOLVED IN THIS WAR AND YET THE SPIRIT OF HERMITCRAFT IS JUST THAT NOBODY CAN RESIST A POINTLESS ENDEAVOR TO FUCK WITH THEIR FRIENDS. I SAY POINTLESS BECAUSE DOC CLEANED IT UP QUICKLY AND EASILY.

Anyway. They threw the Perimeter under a rug and all their videos dropped one after the other like right before Doc came back, and the man lost his shit swearing bloody bloody vengeance on everyone involved on Twitter. Hermitcraft is a family-friendly server, right, and in his latest video he opened it saying it was REALLY hard to not swear like a sailor. This whole thing is wild and you really gotta watch at least the Hermitcraft Recap to get it all, cuz I know I forgot some things

SORRY THIS IS LATE august chewed me up and spit me out but HOLY SHIT THAT IS INCREDIBLE. Oh my god. I have to get into Hermitcraft Immediately

#icy rambles #do… do you have any recommendations for where to Start…

[forever-will-last]

How did this amazing polycule come to be? Both in verse and in the discord if it isn't too much trouble

Sooooo in verse? I don't have an answer LOL the lovely thing about crackfic is you don't always really need an explanation for stuff like this. I have no idea how this polycule came to be but what I DO know is that the in verse characters do NOT follow canon. There was no burn book. There was no bus. Regina still got her back fucked up at one point (not entirely sure how yet, or if I'll go into the details of whatever accident she did have at all) but that's just bc I love disabled and chronically ill Regina and want to write her into some of the one shots.

When did these characters meet? Was it high school? Was it college? Who fucking knows! All I know is the EARLIEST in their four years we'll see is the fall semester of their sophomore (second, for the non Americans) year of college with occasional references to things that happened spring semester freshman year (I only mention this bc I literally reference exactly one thing from freshman year in chapter 3, not sure if itll ever pop up again) because I'm being purposefully vague about it. Maybe later on into writing in this verse I'll have more of a concrete answer but I wouldn't count on it lmfao.

As for the discord server, that I CAN give a better answer on! And this is going to be the WILDEST answer of all time so hang in there.

So we have channels for three different poly ships in our ships channel list on that server: one for Polystics (Regina/Gretchen/Karen (and sometimes Cady, depending on the person/mood/setting/etc)), one for Nightmare Blunt Rotation (Regina/Cady/Janis) and one for Dream Blunt Rotation (Cady/Gretchen/Karen). Now, Nightmare Blunt Rotation as a joke predates me joining that server, so I can't really give you much on how THAT came to be, but Dream Blunt Rotation's name was spawned as a riff on the other, obviously.

Literally just last week we were having one of our "blending sessions" where we basically just brainstorm back and forth about what a specific character or characters would do in a specific situation that can be varying degrees of angst. For example, one of these blending sessions is actually how the entirety of the first Dead!Aaron AU Fic came to be.

In this particular session we were taking a deeper dive into "what if Regina jumped in front of the bus and it wasn't an accident" essentially and I had said something along the lines of "Sui***** Regina in any partnership (take your pick from the standard and adjust their reactions accordingly) where she doesn't let on that there's anything wrong until an attempt."

I was primarily thinking of Cady, Janis, and Gretchen when I sent that, as those are the big three Regina x ___ ships in that server, but someone else said "consider Polystics where she attempts bc she thinks the other two would be better off without her" and this had me thinking. What if there was an insane polycule of Polystics + Cady + Janis...

So I asked the fateful question of "do we have a silly name for this yet like NBR and DBR?" The original suggested names were "Pile of Lesbians", "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall", "Mean Girls", and then... The brilliant Tumblr user Sexycornenthusiast busted out "The Psych Ward" and that was it. We all laughed really fucking hard and knew that had to be the insane name.

This all happened on 4/17 and then on 4/20 I got astronomically high as god intended but I really wanted to write. Now, I have a rule for myself where I don't write fic I intend to publish when I'm high or drunk bc I generally write very serious fic (I cannot imagine what hell chapter of a thousand pictures i would have put out with the level of high I was). But I still REALLY wanted to write so I was like fuck it and asked for one-shot suggestions.

Someone recommended hitting Regina with progressively weirder things throughout the day, as we have an ongoing joke about the various shit Regina gets hit by in fanfic (there's a PHENOMENAL cadina fame au another server member wrote where Regina gets hit by a golf cart and then in my main fic a thousand pictures Regina gets hit by a chair). I loved that idea but was like "wait what ship should I write this with bc I want the first thing to be her getting elbowed by her partner when she wakes up" and someone suggested psych ward and that was it. I knew what I had to do.

After I wrote that one shot i started getting more ideas for this crackfic and decided to make a one shot collection set in the same AU because fuck it. The world needs more crackfic and by God does the world need more psych ward.

(final fun fact before I end this behemoth of a post - I tagged every possible duo/trio of psych ward on the fic on AO3 because I do intend to have at least one chapter dedicated to each possible pairing or trio and there are SEVERAL tags where this is now the only fic in its tag and SEVERAL of the trio tags I had to fully type out because they straight up did not exist at all LMFAO)

#ask #jesus this was long #i have never been concise a day in my life

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #174

The last time you ate leftovers, what was it that you were eating? Uhhhh maybe pizza?

What is your favorite board that you've made on Pinterest? there's zero fucking way i have a board that's just pictures of 50-60-y/o band members hell no no way

Do you get on Facebook or Instagram more? I CHECK Insta more, but I'm scrolling Facebook longer.

What was the last thing you ate or drank that was blue raspberry-flavored? Mountain Dew Voltage, but it's actually been quite a while since I had that one specifically, they're apparently really rare now and people are selling them for a fortune lol

What is one annoying thing your computer does? I hate when it randomly restarts over some error. It doesn't happen often, it's just annoying when it does.

What was the last song you listened to? "Black Wedding" by In This Moment & Rob Halford.

Have you discovered any new hobbies in the past couple months? No. It's seldom I discover new hobbies, honestly...

What's the wildest animal you've ever come in contact with? Well, define "contact;" I can read this as the wildest animal I've physically touched or just seen, and "wildest" can be taken in more than one way. The most surprising animal I've physically touched was a tarantula I guess, but the animal I've been most surprised to see in the wild was a mink, I think, and I didn't even get a good look at it. I'm not including zoo animals in this.

Do you trust your doctor? I trust my primary care physician, even though him being a man makes me slightly uncomfortable; he's a good doctor though that I've been with a good while so it's fine. I don't really have a relationship with my psychiatrist or worst of all therapist, honestly... Both my mom and I really hate the place I have to go to for insurance reasons, but I need SOMEbody in this department so we have no choice.

Do you ever question if your mother loves you? Absofuckinglutely not, I know she loves me with her whole heart and I consider myself unbelievably lucky to have that going for me.

Do you ever feel scared or unsafe around your dad? Not... really anymore, but at the same time, due to past experiences but also horrific nightmares about him, I can sometimes be uneasy if I'm with him and just him, even though I do know in my core he's no threat to me, got a pretty good feeling he'd protect me with his life. Maybe.

What is your favorite type of Lunchables? Absolutely nothing beats the nachos one.

Do you have someone you feel completely safe around? My mom and Girt.

What church do you go to? I don't attend church.

Are any of your siblings' friends like family to you? Basically yeah, in Allison's case. She's my younger sister's best friend/former housemate, and she's involved in some family events, like Ashley's kids' bdays. She was Ryder's very first crush lol, it's still a joke in the family how in love with her he's always been.

Do you have any friends who you exchange memes with? Lol Girt and I do this ALL the time, this is daily shit. Occasionally I will with Tez and Mazzy.

What was the last photo you took? It was Cookie all curled up looking cute as shit on Girt, she loves him. I could tell she was so ready for bed, lol.

Are you in any Discord servers? How often do you use them? I'm a member of literally one, the WoW Secret Finding Discord, but I haven't even clicked on its tab for like, years. I'm just in it if I ever feel like rare mount hunting with help.

Have you ever had to see an emergency vet after hours? Hmmm, I don't THINK so.

When was the last time you sat under a blanket on a couch? A few days ago with Girt.

Can you bite into ice cream or are your teeth too sensitive? I can now that I've had that one wisdom tooth with a really severe cavity taken out. It made nearby teeth agonizingly sensitive; the wisdom tooth itself didn't hurt, but apparently cavities that severe can radiate pain into other teeth, and holy fucking shit did it.

Do you like snowy winter days or do you prefer rainy days? I like snow much more! We don't get it all that much here, we often have a year without any, so I really enjoy it when it happens.

Do you know anyone who doesn't have a middle name? My boyfriend, but I'm pretty sure it's because he's a junior. His sister has a middle name, so.

What was the last thing you complained about? Probably cravings, it's that time of the month and I get really annoyed when my body desperately wants shit it doesn't need.

What celebrity irritates you the most? Elon Musk is up there, he's such a fucking arrogant asshole. I don't think there's one celebrity in specific that I REALLY hate though, the ones that annoy me in general are billionaires that do nothing beneficial for the world and instead hoard wealth. Actually wait, Donald Trump is 200% the top celebrity that I despise, like I would literally have given my life for this shithead to never have been in a position of influence. I like to forget he exists & kinda just did lmfao.

Have you ever watched the Superbowl all the way through? On my 16th birthday, yes; I was at Jason's place, and his dad was a ginormous Giants fan, so I sat out in the living room with the family. I had zero interest in it and was definitely bored, but I was just happy to be involved with my then-boyfriend's family.

Would you like to know the exact date of your death? Absolutely not.

What's on your to-do list for today? Nothing, really. I'm incredibly tired.

Do you know anyone who's been bitten by a snake? I might, idk.

Are you excited for Halloween? I always am, haha. Even if I don't really do anything anymore, I enjoy the vibe. I'd like to maybe do something with Girt this year though, like maybe a haunted hayride or something.

What makes you smile or laugh no matter what? My boyfriend for sure, it really doesn't matter what mood I'm in, he can get both out of me like it's nothing.

Do you prefer strawberries or cherries? Strawberries by far, they're my favorite fruit, meanwhile I despise cherries.

Biggest insecurity? My weight.

Have you ever had braces? Yes, I did for a longer time than I should've because we couldn't afford to get them off so some teeth on my bottom row overcorrected a tiny bit.

Do you feel awkward using public transportation? I certainly would if I actually took it; I don't take taxis, buses, trains, etc.; the only experience I've had with public transportation were plane rides, and I do in fact feel very uncomfortable walking down the aisle to get to my seat. Well I actually did take an Uber for the first time ever with my mom recently, but that's one, single, very brief experience in all of 27 years.

Describe your mom with one word. Selfless. To a fault.

Would you rather bake a cake or cookies? Cookies seem a lot easier.

What curse word do you use most? Almost certainly "fuck" of some form.

Were you always one of those kids who got in trouble with everyone around? No, I very rarely caused trouble as a kid.

When was the last time you took a nap? Did it relax you any? Today actually, and yes. I initially woke up too early.

Honestly, do you see yourself as a slut? Not at all; I am extremely selective with who I'm even remotely sexual with, but I also don't slutshame. Consenting adults can do whatever the hell they want with other consenting adults that are informed about any issues you may carry. I also aggressively encourage you be upfront about your goals relationship-wise; don't want something serious? Say it immediately. Not into only sole partnerships? Say it, immediately. You get it. Be honest and real about what you want.

Is there a secret you’ve never told your parents? Yeah.

What’s the hardest thing you’ve ever been through? The traumatic breakup of my first real relationship.

Do you like fast food or does it disgust you? Dude I'ma be real, fast food is some of my favorite stuff lol, I know that's an extremely unpopular opinion, but whatever. I still certainly avoid it though just for health reasons; I'd say we get someone out maybe just once a week.

Who was the last person you kissed? Girt.

What’s your favourite alcoholic drink? Sangrias.

Do you like the smell of BBQs? I actually really do, even though I dislike the food at most barbeques. Hamburgers and hotdogs are fine, but barbeque chicken, pulled pork, and stuff like that is where I'm out. Southern barbeques ain't for me.

Do you crash on people’s sofas often? Uh no, I've never done that.

Do wasps scare you? Yes, I really don't like how aggressive they are, and that stinger is too long okay.

Have you ever worn flip flops in the snow? lol sure have, but never in even remotely heavy snow. It was only ever to like, leave the house and get in the car though; I wouldn't wear flipflops for an extended period in snow.

Has anyone ever told you that you & your significant other could be siblings? Have they ever assumed you were siblings? Not my current one, no; we look pretty different. It was a joke with my mom that Sara and I were basically twins when we dated, but I don't think anyone ever actually thought we were.

Have you ever heard people having sex in the next room? Pretty positive yes. It was in the apartment when just me, Jacob, and Amanda were home, Jason was probably at work I guess, and from the living room couch I heard Things happening behind me lol

Have you ever been in a beauty pageant? No, I absolutely fucking despise them and their whole premise.

Have you ever lost your voice? Yeah, most recently when I had Covid some time last year. My voice was gone for quite a long time.

Museum date or aquarium date? Aquarium.

Did you ever have an emo or scene phase? Haha you know it.

Name a subject you know a lot about. I probably know most about meerkats, or Silent Hill stuff.

Most embarrassing poster you’ve ever owned? I don't think I've had one I'd be embarrassed by.

Could you see yourself having a child with the last person you kissed? Yeah I could, but it's not something we want to do in the foreseeable future.

Who is your favorite person to have random conversations with? Girt, I love learning new stuff about him.

Who was the last person to make you feel embarrassed or uncomfortable? My mom, literally like an hour ago. She said something not realizing the topic is one I'm self-conscious about. I was really upset over it for a few minutes.

What are you known for? Most likely as the lazy deadbeat kid.

Which of the guys you’ve been interested in hurt you the most? Idk if I've mentioned a "Jason" before in these????????????

Do you know anyone who is engaged? Yes, my high school friend Kelly recently got engaged to her long-time boyfriend, and I'm stoked for her. She's been so in love with this guy and she deserves the world.

What is your relationship status on Facebook? In a relationship with Girt, but pending after nearly two years lmao. It's not something he hides or anything, he just barely touches Facebook and by now the notification would be buried under like, hundreds of others, because at some point he ticked some setting that notified him when I merely post anything, and with how much shit I share, he's never finding it lol. I would only be bothered by this if it wasn't for the fact his behavior fully shows we're together, and how he acts toward me doesn't change in front of others.

What are you listening to? I'm watching/listening to WoolieVS' LP of Dark Souls.

What was the last thing you looked up on Google? What a mudslide drink is, actually for that earlier question. I had something like that at Sara's place years ago and it was fuckin magical lol, but I never asked what exactly it was, but that one seems the most likely.

Ever been kissed on the leg? Uh maybe? I can't remember a specific occasion though.

Last person to hear you cry? Either Mom or Girt probably, idk.

What do you think of the term plus-sized in modeling? Is it empowering or demeaning? It's demeaning as fuck; modeling is modeling. By adding the descriptor of "plus-sized," you're indebatably making it sound like the person isn't a real, ideal model.

Do you think you are ready to be on your own (have your own home, job, etc.)? Absolutely not entirely on my own, no. By now I really want to live with Girt, but without a source of income, I'd be very uncomfortable relying on him, even though he's told me he doesn't care. I care. I already fucking hate relying on the person that gave birth to me.

Has your ex ever gone out with someone close to you? No, not that I know of.

Are you friends with someone who’s autistic? My niece is, and I'm fucking finally getting evaluated for it myself at the end of this month. I, along with my mother and others that have watched me grow up, are very confident I have high-functioning Asperger's.

Have you ever had a Bic Mac? No, I'm not into lettuce on burgers, so it's a no by default.

Have you ever been to a convention? (comic, YouTube, etc.) I went to a reptile one/NARBC with Sara once, and I loved it, even though I struggled quite badly with my legs. I'd love love love to go to another, once my legs are a little bit better!

What is the biggest difference between you and your best friend? I'm way more emotional, while Girt is a very practical person. He has emotions, I've seen them, but he's much more in control of them than I am.

#survey #surveys #random questions #personal questions #questionnaire

[ilooklikeaburntchickenugget]

Porcelain Doll

A/N: My first Steve story on Tumblr! And I think my first every Mafia AU for Steve ever... lets hope this goes well. Enjoy! Pairing: Mafia!Steve x F!Reader Word count: 2,909 Warnings: Mentions of weapons, swearing, angst.

(I don’t know the owner of this Gif, but it’s not mine. Just wanted to mention that.)

Being weaved within the world of mafia was a choice that you had willingly made.

When you said 'I do' you vowed to be with Steve til death do you part. Literally. Divorces were not only unheard of within the culture of bosses, it was a death wish. No secret could be leaked by an unhappy wife.

Granted, you had never dreamed of leaving Steve. The perfect man, who was stubborn at times, but you could always break past those barriers of ignorance he occasionally put up. In fact, you could bulldoze right through.

And you were the only one that could. Not Bucky, Sam, or Nat could compare to your ability to have that man breaking down every little secret he had stored in that mind of his. At the snap of your finger with him, your wish was his command.

You only had one duty to do, other than be faithful and loving to your husband: you had to oblige by mafia rules that were set for you. They weren't too overwhelming, it was a very limited amount. But it was enough so Steve could watch you like a vulture, if he wanted to.

And technically speaking, you could play his puppet whenever he pleased, and you wouldn't have the option to say no. He never enforced such power, always honoring your freedom and independence. But right now, he didn't have a choice.

"Babe, I need you to do this." He begged from behind his large wood desk, his study lit by antique lamps which cascaded their light onto polished mahogany surfaces.

"Steve, I will not be in another man's arms." You stated, fighting right back. Your arms over your chest, bottom lip easing out of it's hold with a pout.

"Sweetheart, you have to do this!" He elaborated, on the verge of defeat, his face now looking at the floor as his blue eyes scanned over his two feet, contemplating his next move.

"Do I have to though? Why not Nat, or- or someone else!" You threw your hands up in frustration. "I mean, seriously Steven, you cannot be for real right now-"

"Enough!" He rose his voice, the lion's roar booming through the room and ricocheting on the books and stained glass right into your chest. "You will be doing this. And you do not have an option." He emphasized, slamming his fist down. You flinched at the 'thump' that came as a result of the impact. He took a deep breath settling down, his gaze still facing downwards.

He took a few more breaths, moving his head up to meet your face. His eyes filled with a black void of heartlessness and atrocious intentions transitioned into a wave of calming blue, his pupils frantically searching your face as he realized he had scared you beyond your wildest thoughts. "Baby I-" He began but you stopped him soon after.

"I- I will do it." You choked out, your voice barely above a whisper, eyes filling with warm tears that began to fall gracefully down your cheeks, smudging your perfectly done makeup. You took a deep breath yourself, sniffling just a bit, before turning around and walking out of the study, arms now crossed tighter across your chest, and your feet setting off small pitter patters as you hurried yourself across of the rustic hardwood flooring.

Closing the grand doors behind you, Steve let out a sigh and a huff, turning around "Damn it!" He yelled, taking his large fist to the wall. He never intended to hurt you in any capacity, just like he never intended to punch that now crumbling hole in the plaster wall behind his desk, but mistakes happen. Only this was a grave mistake on his part.

You were rushing to your shared bedroom, quiet sobs leaving your mouth. Covering your face as best you could to try and prevent anyone from knowing, your ran up the glass stairs and to the second floor. "Y/N/N?" You heard Bucky's voice coo. You chose to ignore him and moved even faster than before to your room, where you locked the door. Crashing on the Egyptian cotton sheets, which swallowed you in great warmth and comfort, you sobbed into one of your sleeves, choosing not to subject your pillow to such a burden.

"What the fuck did you do?" Bucky marched into Steve's office, uninvited but not giving a thought to it. Looking behind where his boss and best friend sat, head in his hand, was the very hole in the wall Steve had just caused. “You idiot!” He scoffed, walking over and leaning over his desk. “Why was Y/N just running down the hall sobbing?” Steve took a heavy sigh, not looking up.

“I fucked up, big time.” Steve explained. Bucky rolled his eyes.

“So you told her?” He asked and Steve nodded. “How did you do it?” “How do you think, Buck?” Steve fired back.

“Judging by your crying wife and the whole in the wall, you fought.” “Yes, I fought.” He clarified, “I yelled at her. She fought back saying she didn’t wanna do it, I lost my patience.” “You stupid Punk.” Bucky laughed a bit, Steve looking up with a confused look, “You thought she would react any differently?”

“Well, maybe more cooperatively-” Steve began, but was interrupted.

“You’re asking your wife to go and flirt with your rival in a sleazy little dress that’s basically lingerie with a few pieces of fabric connecting it.” He sighed, “You’re asking the woman who loves you, who would literally die for you to go out with another man, and you expect her to be on board? If she reacted positively I would be more concerned.” “Well I didn’t think she would react positively, per se.” Steve rebutted, “Maybe just a little more willingly.” “You still don’t know a damn thing about women.” Bucky sighed, “You have the most loyal, loving, beautiful wife probably sobbing in bed right now because you scared the shit out of her. And you’re gonna sit here and just act like a fool?” He asked, “Why don’t you go apologize? That would be a good place to start.” “I probably should.” Steve leaned back in his chair, getting up and marching out.

He powered through your spacious and modern penthouse, making haste knowing the time was ticking. Approaching your bedroom door he took a deep breath, standing outside and giving it a soft knock. “Baby?” He cooed outside, leaning into the door to hear you soft sobs, “Doll?” He twisted the knob on the door, noticing it was locked. He sighed with annoyance. “Baby, c’mon now let me in.” “No.” You responded, holding your pillow in your lap like a child.

“Baby doll,” He softly said, “C’mon now, I just wanna apologize.”

“I said no.” You repeated again, this time more aggravation in your voice. He took a sigh.

“If you don’t willingly open this door up, I’ll open it up for you.” He warned. You huffed, still firm on your decision. “Fine.” He murmured, running back downstairs and into one of the side rooms, where he went in one of the drawers, picking up a key. Running right back, and up stairs, he placed the small metal object in the key hole, turning it and letting himself in.

You groaned, sitting back on the back of the bed, rolling your eyes. “Fuck you.” You spat out at him. He scoffed.

“C’mon babe, we both know you don’t mean that.” “Please,” You scoffed right back, “If I didn’t mean it then why did I say it?”

“Baby doll,” He sighed, smirking at you, “I love you. And I came here to apologize.” You pouted at him, keeping a straight face.

“Do you mean it?” You questioned, raising one of your eyebrows, looking at him. He nodded. “How do I know?” Your husband walked over to you, laying in bed on his side. You scooted further over to yours, trying to expand the space between you two.

“Baby,” He said softly, his words sounding like music to your ears, but you refused to look at him, “Sweetheart.” He said again, you still refused to move. He took your chin, softly in his large, warm hand. Moving your head to face his, he bent down and kissed you softly. Fireworks of tenderness exploded in your chest, as you hummed out of instinct. He smile lightly into the kiss.

“Because I love you, more than anything in this world.”

“Fine.” You reluctantly sighed, “I forgive you.” You stated, swallowing roughly. “I’m sorry I fought back, I should have gone with the plan.” “No, I understand why you did.” He nodded, “I shouldn’t have lashed out at you and let you see that side of me. You don’t deserve anything near that.” You nodded, leaning your head onto his shoulder. He tenderly kissed the top of your head, taking your smaller hand in his.

“How do you feel?” Bucky asked with a heavy sigh of disapproval as you looked in the mirror at this tiny black fabric that was a disgrace of a dress.

“Exposed, slutty, sleazy, whore-ish, should I continue?” You turned back to he and Steve, your husband clearly enjoying the view, taking his bottom lip in his mouth, “Hey!” You snapped at him, to which he escaped his trance, “Eyes on mine, not my ass.”

“C’mon now.” Bucky got up, sighing again in frustration. “We gotta go.”

You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms and walking out feeling beyond embarrassed for this apparel. A lot of mafia wives wore similar outfits to the one you had on, borderline stripper. You preferred classy and elegant, this was far from your cup of tea.

Getting out of the solid black car, you took a final deep breath, stepping out to begin playing your loose persona. Black pumps pattered on the ground as your walked into the mansion, your red lipstick curling up into a nice smile as you began greeting people.

The women were green with envy, their eyes filled with both red flames of jealousy and blue waves of fear. The men acted like dogs and pigs, looking you up and down like the cheap piece of meat you were acting out. You hated it, you truly did. Everything about the ordeal was already wrenching enough.

You were greeted by one of the server’s and a glass of much needed champagne. You wanted to down it, let the pain simmer away, but you slowly sipped as a proper lady would. Ironic with the outfit.

Looking around at the large ball room of people chatting, you finally found your target. His ridiculously untamed black hair, barely shaved face lined with wrinkles and harsh eyes were enough to let you know that was Brock Rumlow.

You walked over to him, a small smile on your face despite the pure growl underneath it. Making sure to jut your hips out a bit more, you immediately caught his attention.

“Well, well, well,” His voice echoed to you, as you kindly smiled now across from him, his suit not fitted well you noticed. “If it isn’t Mrs. Rogers.” “Please, Mr. Rumlow.” You played your character, “No formalities needed, Y/N, is just fine.”

“Hm,” He hummed with brief thought, “I thought the Rogers’ clan always took great pride in the name.” “Well,” You sighed, taking a sip of your drink, “Some things change.” “Oh?” He asked, “Like what?”

“Loyalty, trust, one’s pleasure.” You smirked, he clearly caught on. Fast.

“Pleasure, you say?” He inquired.

“You heard me right.” You sighed.

“So why’d you come to me?” He asked again, trying to act dumbfounded.

“You know why, Mr. Rumlow.” You stated. He hummed and nodded once.

“Follow me.”

He guided you through the winding whirlwinds of people, up one of the various grand staircases. Down the darkly lit hallway and into one of the bedrooms.

You didn’t want to jinx yourself, but so far this was too easy. Granted, it was Brock Rumlow. He was a loose cannon, the opposite of Steve. Steve ran a tight ship, the organization was established with concrete and stone foundations. Rumlow was some sticks put together. He left paper trails and greasy fingerprint all over his business, leaving Steve a laundry list of reasons to get rid of his rival.

His hands grabbed your hips, and as much as you wanted to pull away, you had to let him have you, if even for the next minute. You pretended to be okay, but no enjoyment was very much visible. He didn’t seem to notice. His hands reached down along your curves, moving and grabbing your ass. You could feel his breath reach your face, his lips inches away from yours.

It all happened so fast. One moment you were about to engage in a kiss with a man you despised, the next you were held at gunpoint in a headlock by the very same man. You opened you eyes calmly, looking around to see a dozen of Steve’s men from all angles, guns pointed at Rumlow’s head. The cool point of the weapon was on the side of your head, your hands tightly at your sides. “Let her go, Rumlow.” Steve walked in, staring at him. “If you wanna make it out alive, let her go.”

He harshly laughed, “Oh please,” He stated, “It’s not like I’d want to make it out alive by your dirty hands anyways.” “I’m pretty sure I’m not the one stealing other peoples property.” He barked, “So stop touching mine.” You remained calm, keeping your breath steady just like Steve had always told you to do.

The room fell silent. You could feel Rumlow’s fingers move on the gun ever so slightly, prompting you to know he was cocking it. With one easy move, you took your left elbow, smashing it into his chin behind you. He fell back with a groan, gun being thrown which you managed to catch with ease, like Nat had taught you. Cocking it yourself, you pointed it at the man now on the ground.

Looking back, Steve stood in partial awe and confusion at the site. You with the very gun you were threatened with now pointed at your attacker. “Take ‘em.” Steve stated, as numerous men went and grabbed him up, tying him with duct tape as he wailed for help. You walked over to Steve as he walked over to you, his fingertips tracing your jawline, “Are you alright?” He asked, face turning to concern. You nodded.

“Yeah, I’m okay.” He grabbed your waist, giving you a deep kiss, using one of his hands to run it through your once perfectly done hair.

“Where did you learn that?” He muttered, you lightly laughed.

“Nat.” You smirked into his ear.

“Doll you could’ve hurt yourself-” “Steve.” You insisted, placing one of your hands on his chest, “I’m not a porcelain doll. I married into mafia, I can’t be.” He sighed, looking away only for a brief moment of thought before turning back to you.

“I know you’re not.” He muttered, “I’m just worried.” You nodded.

“I know.” You caressed his cheek with your hand, “You always are.” You both lightly laughed, smiling at each other and lost in each other’s passion for one another despite little to no conversation taking place.

“Uh, hey boss.” Sam walked in somewhat awkwardly, knocking on the door. Steve turned around, hands still placed on your hips as your attention was now on Sam as well, “We might wanna go, like, now, so no one suspects anything.” “Yeah, right.” Steve dropped his hands from you, grabbing one of yours to lead you out one of the secret back doors and into one of the cars. You squeezed in next to Steve, him placing a hand on your thigh lovingly.

“So, when do I get a raise?” You gazed out the window at the various cars passing by.

“Your raise?” Steve scoffed, “What raise?” You sighed heavily.

“I did most of that job for you.” You rolled your eyes. “Got the target, took his weapon, got him on the ground.”

“Doll, it wasn’t that easy-” “It seemed that easy.” He sarcastically laughed.

“You’re insatiable sometimes.” He rolled his eyes.

“Using big words now, are we?” You turned to him, “I could use a bigger pay too.” “Fine.” He gave in, “What do you want.”

“A long weekend, just you and me, no work, in Napa Valley.” He gave you a confused look, “You heard me.” “Doll that’s a little much don’t you think-” “Four days.” “Sweetheart-” “Five.” “Honey I can’t-” “Six.”

“There’s not even that many wineries, I-” “One week.” “Fine!” He huffed, “One fucking week in Napa, no work no nothing. Excluding emergencies, where I will make it up to you somehow. Good enough?”

“Nat and Bucky need to be there too.” You retorted, “Staying at a different house, keep in mind.” “Babe, where will they stay?” “Steven, you have three houses out there, figure it out.” You scoffed.

“Fine. But that’s it.” He began, “This is your reward for your hard work.”

“Hard work? I would describe it more as flawless.” He eyed you, shooting a glare. “I love you.” You kindly smiled, giving him a kiss on the cheek. “Now when we get home you’re gonna plan that trip, right?” “What do you mean I-” “Well, it’s not like it’ll plan itself.”

#steve rogers #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers fan fiction #mafia!steve rogers #mafia!steve rogers x reader #mcu #marvel #mcu fanfiction #marvel fanfictio #Chris Evans #chris evans fanfiction #mob!steve rogers x reader #mob!steve rogers #steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers x you #mafia!steve rogers x you #mafia!steve rogers x y/n

[melodyofthevoid]

also fae pilot i love that one to pieces- what woul dhave been like the logical conclusion to that one i dont think i ever heard about it

Seems to be a popular one! Alright, I'll give the breakdown and then get to the actual ending bit! I think this was a situation of having a couple of convos across different servers lmao.

The gist of the au is the old story about changelings. You know, babies that the fae would leave in place of a human child, taking the human to their realm and leaving the imposter behind. Well, in this case, the swap happens later in life, and prior to Zib pulling any bullshit. Zib's got magic but hasn't attempted the mirroring.

At first, everyone assumes that Dib's odd behavior is him trying to adjust to the responsibilities that are upcoming, and it's just nerves. Zim and Dib had a fight the night before and Zim's doing his best to smooth things over. Although if anything it almost seems like Dib straight up forgot about the fight. Weird. Then Zim starts to notice some minor things off, Dib not eating, being overly chipper, hell... he even starts...

Dressing in yellows and reds. How awful. Zib takes this as carte blanch to go full emo as well and Gaz is confused.

Zib, well. Zib caught on fairly quick that this wasn't Dib, or wasn't entirely Dib. But "Dib" made his stance fairly clear on any interference.

“If you stay out of my way, I can give you power beyond your wildest imagination. All you have to do is keep quiet, eh brother? Do you think you can do that? Or will you need to be... dealt with?”

Also having a being that looks like your brother 180 turn his head is... unnerving.

Once Zim and Gaz have a clue of what's going on, the cracks in the imposter's (hah) disguise really start showing, yet at the same time, Pilot is becoming more aware of his ability to pull on heartstrings and lays into all of them in some way or another. Including Zib. Because that's fun.

In any case, the trio (with a reluctant Zib) demand their actual Dib back, to which Pilot denies them, saying that soon, he will be the only Dib, he's close. Dib only needs to mess up once and he'll be lost to the Other. Somehow they all (Pilot included) end up in the fae realm and now we see what Dib's been up to this whole time.

Dib, for his part, has done his level best to not give into any of the bullshit tropes. He knows he can't eat anything here, he can't give up his real name, and he can't fall for any illusions. No matter how tempting they are. He constantly feels like he's starving, even though he's not changing in any way, and memories are getting fuzzy. They've tried to make him give up the knife in his hand, and he can't tell why, until he remembers a little. They literally can't take it. It's iron.

By the time the gang find him, Dib's exhausted and on the verge of biting into a fruit, just to make it all stop. He's convinced that this is all fake and pilot has switched into full "pretending to be Dib" mode, trying to confuse Zim and co into taking him back instead.

Unfortunately Pilot slips and tries to claim that he's always wanted the throne, to rule with Zim. Zim then stabs a bitch. Dib never wanted that and sure as shit wouldn't start even after being lost in another realm.

Now they deal with this fucker.

A fucked up boy. We love to see it.

They win, go home, Dib eats and gets to enjoy sanity, alls well that ends well.

#melody rambles #fae pilot au #royalty au #thanks for the asks #art by shands I'm not @'ing them agian #again #zib #zadr

[illusion-of-sea-axes]

so i watch dreams speedruns vs hunters and im aware of his smp but i thought it was just a silly little place where tommy interrogates bbh about swearing??? WHAT IS GOING ON IN THAT PLACE???? (your art is just WONDERFUL btw. i love it)

Oh my god. Also, thank you!

And at first I too thought it was silly, like, same brand as Hermitcraft silly where this ‘Bastardization arc’ I kept hearing about was Will going around like doing pranks and stealing shit and that the pig guy was named Scott or something and he was hoarding potatoes and being a silly little king.

I was very very wrong. 

A LOT OF SHIT IS GOING ON. A LOT!!! I mean, yeah, Tommy, Fundy, Quackity, and Tubbo did spend like a whole stream menacing BBH and George but that is only *some* of the nonsense that happens on that server. Some. George has slept through quite a bit of it, though. 

You. Have peered in after the wildest part of the plot ever which involved like ten stacks of TNT, a lot of Netherite, a tyrant dying from too much whey protein (essentially), lots of screaming, and Philza Minecraft. Also Wilbur being a dramatic theater kid. Lots of that. Fundy and Dream are engaged, Sapnap and Karl are engaged, wedding dates are still pending.

 Tubbo is president and a demon hunter, Quackity is a stripper, Techno is the potato man, I think Eret is currently homeless, and Fundy has daddy issues and Philza is his grandpa. Also there’s still a long-standing war between Tommy and Dream with no ending in sight. 

Also Dream instilled a monarchy. That happened. Funnily enough he is not the one in said monarchy. 

If you really wanna like get into it, I started with Wilbur Soot’s videos (he has a playlist) and bounced around to different SMP members (mainly Fundy. I care he). WIlbur is the most dramatic and theatrical, I think, though Techno certainly gets up there. Hilariously enough, my first time hopping on a stream was the Nov. 16th one and it was with Fundy because I care he and he deserves good things. I was not prepared for what happened.

But if you do get into it, I gotta say, most of the Hamilton soundtrack will no longer be about Hamilton when you listen to it again. (which might be an improvement to you, idk)

For a frame of reference, the most morally-just characters are the two 16 year olds and Niki. So that should tell you something.

[minecraftoworymode]

bob the old builders

#OK I KNOW WANDA PAINTED THIS I JUST KNOW SHE DID #WHY DID THEY CUT THIS THUIS SO FUNNY #MCSM #also the steve placeholder.. bro im telling u.. they keep confirming my lore #it keeps Happening #Many Thoughts Head Full. #ok but the fact its Just Fred raises many questions like binta knew about xara and rom but they arent considered on the same level as fred #even though the three of them created the universe together... so is it just like the three divided communities rewriting their own religio #steve here is very likely just a placeholder like hes been in concept art before but like... i have no doubt in my mind soren would be here #i stand by my fucking lore to the grave that the first ever steve avatars were the first builders and soren was a part of them #and thats THAT. on THAT. period.

@b0x​ TO BORROW A PHRASE, YOUR THIRD EYE IS NOT ONLY OPEN BUT SHOOTING DEADLY LASERS (I HOPE ITS OK TO TAG YOU/SHOW YOUR TAGS AHHGHHDFHGDFHGK) I’D LOVE TO HEAR MORE ABOUT YOUR LORE?!?!? N AS AN OFFERING I WOULD LIKE TO EXTEND MY OWN THOTS ON THESE FUNKY LITTLE CUBES

(related to my ideas on classes and worlds)

SO steve n alex do factor in to my mcsm au but they weren’t the first humans (or humans at all for that matter but. thats another post)- those would indeed be the old builders (tho i also like to call them ‘moderators/mods’ bc, ha ha admins and mods... n i kind of like the idea of referring to them collectively as the moderation bc none of them have ANY impulse control except maybe soren and otto once every century or so.)

i think the admins took on (at the very least) three “proteges” among them and we meet most in game. i’ll be naming the groups by the time-honoured convention of ‘shared flawed mindset that bites them in the tushie’.

“WHO NEEDS HEALTHY COPING MECHANISMS WHEN YOU HAVE GODLIKE POWERS? IF I’M HAVING FUN EVERYONE ELSE SHOULD BE TOO!”: mevia, hadrian, cassie rose, with romeo’s favourite probably being hadrian. all obsessed with being extra, getting what they want, and being generally choleric. i mean you couldn’t just sit down and talk things out like a reasonable adult, you had to build a death mansion murder mystery complete with scooby doo style killersona? you couldn’t just keep your games fun and balanced, you HAD to turn it into a minecraft hunger games where no one is there by choice just so you can be amused by the struggles of people you dont see as people? you couldn’t just offer a good enough reward to entice jesse to come to your icy palace of doom willingly, you had to trash their town and then threaten their entire world?? guys, please go to therapy. please.

"I KNOW THIS SITUATION ISN’T RIGHT BUT I NEED WAIT UNTIL I CAN BE SURE I’M MAKING THE BEST AND FAIREST DECISION I- OOPS THERE GOES MY WINDOW OF OPPORTUNITY TO ACT. WELP, TIME TO TRIP AND SPILL ALL MY TICTACS”: otto, soren, (binta?? i have no canon justification for this one but making it make sense is,,, another post ghklfHGLKD). as it seems that the old builders all have (or had until it got stolen/destroyed) an enchanted flint and steel, soren having had one would explain his books being in almost every other world the gang visits (including, notably, fred’s keep in the underneath..). though it doesn’t explain why soren’s ended up in a random loot chest. (at least, canon doesn’t- i have som hcs about why soren wouldn’t want to draw the admin’s attention to himself, n using a flint and steel would definitely do that- so in this case it was probably ivor’s crowbrain going “ooo, shiny artifact! might as well steal that too for when i’m done with this whole command block stuff.”)

“I’M ABOUT TO GO ABSOLUTELY OFF THE SHITS AND YOU CAN’T STOP ME. MAY MY PATRON SAINT MUMBO JUMBO BE WITH ME TODAY, BECAUSE THIS MAY OR MAY NOT GO HORRIBLY WRONG. FOR SCIENCE!!!”: harper, isa, (yeah i dont really know who could be the third one in canon- idt ellegaard was an old builder- so this ones a big ole ???), with harper being xara’s favourite. admittedly i’m not sure about isa, she’s only really here because of the eversource- but considering the only others who mention those are the old builders, well... wrt isa’s lack of old builder powers, i think that xara’s old builders liked to try doing things that had never been done before (or any visionary-aligned individuals, really,, hence the name ghklfdhglkd). for harper that was building pokemon red in minecraft pama, and for isa that was renouncing her old builder powers so as to live amongst her people like one of them (tho this was more of a social experiment).

finally, the purpose of the old builders (DELVING STRAIGHT INTO HC TERRITORY HERE)- in addition to having beings to interact with other than the villagers- were to be sort of microcosms of what romeo is/was to the mcsm universe as operator/op, but for individual worlds (bc the admins aren’t going to be in all of them at once, even if they can inhabit multiple bodies). the role of the operator is to be the creator and catalyst, to keep the universe/server running, to introduce new factors into it so that it can grow and become something better than it was before. (this also means that romeo literally cannot die/be killed, bc the universe is dependent on his existence.)

it’s not that worlds can’t take care of themselves, but in the event of potentially catastrophic threats emerging, it’d be good to have someone with admin powers lite to step in and stop things before things escalated n potentially spread to other worlds- tho only as a very very very last resort, bc otherwise how are u gonna farm champions?

anyhow this post is getting. pretty loNG so, on a last note- my stance on canon lore (esp mcsm lore, or what little of it there is) is that they’re more guidelines than actual rules so i’ll admit some of my au (new game +) does just yeet canon, tho i tried to keep the absolute wildest shit out of this post. again, i’d be SUPER interested in hearing more about your own takes on the lore/plot/literally any aspect of this game?!?!?! my hyperfixation level has been at 418% for the past few months and it hasnt gone down and i am. s o thirsty for content... i hoPE IT WASN’T PRESUMPTUOUS OF ME TO MAKE THIS POST N ALSO THAT UR HAVING A GOOD DAY/NIGHT/PERIOD OF THE 24-HOUR CYCLE WE BASE OUR LIVES UPON AAAAAAA

#mcsm #minecraft story mode #msg #F for cassie rose im so sorry there werent enough poses in the original meme bas #e

[ardentlythieving]

HEWWO EVERYBODY IT’S END OF YEAR RECAP TIME WITH ME: UR PAL ARDO

First of all if ur reading this, merry christmas if u celebrate it and happy holidays if u don’t!!! Y’all are amazing people and I hope this time of year is a good one for you, and if it’s not I hope you find the time to do smth nice for urself!!

Dam this year has been crazy tho. I mean if ur dash is anything like mine you’ve prob seen all those posts talking about how long this year has felt re: the sheer amount of stuff happening. But on a more individual level there’s some stuff I wanna say I guess so in no particular order here is my Thoughts™ coz there’s been some good, some bad, and some weird this year. 

So, this year has been a kind of wild one for me in terms of things changing. The big one being that I started university and kinda lost contact with most of my pals from high school. All goods tho, coz I met some amazing new people thru tabletop gaming who idk if I’m at the friends point with yet, but I defo wanna try and get there coz they’re cool as heck. It’s true what people say that starting university is a big change coz DAM things have been wild and hopefully are gonna keep being wild next year espc coz one of my online friends is moving down to start at my university and I’m super excited to meet her in person!! Speaking of meeting people in person I finally got to hang out with @chipmunkwithwings at her place and that was one of the highlights of my year for sure! She’s a super cool person and that week was just utterly brilliant.

Anyways while we’re on the topic of friends this year sure has been exciting for that as well. I’ve made some amazing new ones, gotten closer with some older ones, had some drift apart and thru it all I’ve learnt something important. Namely that, there’s nothing wrong with the friends I had before, but I’ve felt so much better and it’s just been so much healthier for me now I’ve also started pursuing and focusing on friendships with people around my age. It sounds weird to say, but despite having a good collection of close friends there was a part of me that was lonely, and that part has kinda stopped being so much now not all my friends are 10ish years older than me. 

That’s one thing I’ve discovered, but this year has been a big one for discovery for me. I tried a bunch of different papers and found out that I hate international relations and love philosophy. I’ve started learning Swedish!! And probably the biggest and most important discovery: thanks to my friends telling me “dude you really need to do this” I’ve gotten on anti-depressants!!! Which have really been helping me so much. That’s probably.... my biggest regret is that I didn’t get on them a few years ago. Still, I’m on them now and my head is just working so much better. Also, and I’ve talked about this in an earlier post so if you wanna kno deets you can go read it, I properly I guess remembered? stopped repressing? how a friend abused me a few years ago and started working thru the issues I have because of that.  

At this point I’m gonna put things under a cut coz this is where shit is gonna get long. 

Some letters, to the people I’ve known this year. I know a LOT of people so I’m prob gonna not mention anyone so if I don’t mention you: I love y’all. Ur so so fucking brilliant all of u and I’m honored to know you and to have had this chance to be in contact with y’all. I’m deeply sorry for any way I might have wronged you over this year, and if any of you wronged ME I forgive you entirely. If any of you haven’t really talked to me, but want to; or if we’ve drifted outta contact and you wanna pick things back up or ANYTHING at all feel free to msg me anytime. My discord is ardentlyThieving#4893 and this is an open invitation to anyone reading this coz there’s a ton of cool ppl on here who I haven’t talked to as much as I’d like. Anyways onto the individual stuff.

To the afternoon gang. You guys all mean so so fucking much to me, more than probably anyone else. Ur my best support network, my greatest pals. Being friends with you all is a fucking delight. I know I’m not always active in our server, but trust me that it’s nothing on you. I’ve enjoyed every moment hanging out with you guys. Or well, most of them at least :P. We have the wildest conversations and trust me, I wouldn’t have it any other way. I know some of you guys have had a hard time this year and I’m so sorry that you guys are going thru that shit coz y’all deserve so much better. It’s my deepest hope that next year is a good one for all of you and if there’s every anything I can do you guys know where to find me. I love you so so so so so much and I hope these last few days of 2018 are as good for you as they can possibly be.

To the people of Eff’s servers. You guys are super duper cool. Being salty with y’all is so much fun and also so deeply annoying that people keep pulling this shit that we gotta be salty about. I love the fact that we can go from shitty meme posting (usually my fault) to having in depth n thoughtful conversations about just about anything (hopefully usually not my fault). Y’all are amazing people and it feels like you’ve all found urselves a bit more this year, which I’m so happy for you about.

To Sakshi. That’s right, u get an individual one. Ur like, my hero. Srsly dude the fact that ur so fucking patient with the utter dumbasses msging you and that u started this whole deep conversation that ur not backing down from? I’m so proud of you, I admire you so much, and you have my utmost support. Hmu if you ever need me to drag someone for you. Also i’m sorry to out you as a gamer to the fine people of tumblr dot com (actually I’m not that sorry) but it’s been so much fun playing swtor with you. And salt watching things with you. I love how fun our friendship is and also how we can have proper deep conversations like 10/10 A+ content. 

To Hammi. Dude you are awesomesauce. My fave lesbian pal. I love memeing with you and gaming with you and chatting with you. Here’s to another great year broski!

To Clare. We’ve only just met at the very end of this year and I’m so glad we did. Ur super cool and funny and I love ur art n posts.

To my swtor guild. Another group of wonderful people who I’ve only just met. i’m so fucking excited to get to know all of you better coz y’all have such great swtor opinions and are so much fun to play with. Sorry about what I did to the Gizka flagship bridge lmao.

To Sofa. DUDE HI! becoming friends with you this year has been one of the highlights. Thank you for all the support you’ve given me and for all the fun times we’ve had. I adore playing video games with you and I fucking love ur swtor ocs. You’ve been there for me so much, and I hope I’ve been there for you as well. Thank you for everything.

To Marie. Yet another person I met later on this year and haven’t had the chance to get so close with. Defo my bad there I need to msg you more often. Thanks for being there for me, even though I was kind of a shitty friend to you at one point. I didn’t deserve ur patience but you gave it to me anyway and I’m so fuckin grateful for that. I hope to make that up to you in the coming year. <3

To Jason. We were tight at the start of the year and kinda drifted apart which I regret. Msg me anytime dude and if you ever reinstall swtor you should totally hmu coz playing it with you was a ton of fun!! 

To Traya. I know we’ve only talked on and off this year, but I’m so excited for you to be at my university and to hang out in person!! Hang in there dude, coz there’s so many cool people for you to meet and take it from me that university really is so much better than college.

Ok this is where the happy positivity ends!! Again I love y’all so much and I hope that next year is better for all of you then this one was!!! Thanks for being pals with me, I appreciate it so much even when I’m not great at showing it.

Coz there’s one more letter I gotta write coz after however many years I want closure. This is where it ends.

To Teri. Wow. I never thought I’d be saying ur name again. Well typing, but w/e. That first year we were friends was so fucking good and I’m glad we had that, coz you were a pretty cool person. I dunno why you decided to change all that and start hurting me and I’m probably never gonna understand but you know what? That’s ok. I don’t need to. You hurt me, I got out. I’m not sure, but I think you were being hurt by people as well and I hope you got out like I did. No matter how badly you treated me you still don’t deserve to be abused urself. Nobody deserves that. I don’t know if I forgive you, and I don’t know if I ever will, but I hope things are better for you now. I’m sorry for the times I wronged you while we were friends. This isn’t me saying I deserved to be abused by you, because I sure as hell didn’t, but well. Two wrongs don’t make a right and ur abuse doesn’t magically erase the times I wasn’t the greatest friend. I thought ignoring the things you did to me would make things better, but instead I let it all fester inside me and change my behaviour without realizing that’s what happened. So this is me letting go of it all. Coz you don’t get to fuckin take anything else away from me. I’m better now than I was then despite everything you did to me. This is me, making a conscious choice to heal and move on and grow. It’s not gonna be easy, but imma do it and it’s gonna be so fucking wonderful. This is Arden signing out because you don’t GET to have any control over my life anymore. Never ever again.

#ardently original #happy long ass christmas post lads

[dragonpigeons]

Bam. I cannot believe how much I have drawn (and improved?) this past year. I owe it all to the support of my friends and followers. Thank you.

Special Mentions to Special People

@casxia @anandinair @serensama: My two sisters/wives and mother, respectively. A girl couldn’t ask for a better family :’) I know we’re all busy doing our shit but whenever I hear from you guys it makes my day. You’re all so talented and I hope you get what you’re after in your crafts because, dang it if y’all don’t deserve it and more! Thank you for being the first friends I made on Tumblr and sticking with me. Let’s talk more in 2018!

@7space0chips7 @lilith5th @sander-sonia @crystalsoul16 @yoosungsbutt aka the Plus Ultra Server: You guys are lit. I’ve had the funniest and wildest chats ranging from outlandish speculations on ink boy’s quirk to designing the most ridiculous otome game featuring Larry the Seagull together (which we should totes carry on doing LOL). You never fail to make me laugh. Let’s Go Beyond to 2018 PLUS ULTRA!!!

@kuromiyadk @indispanna @blissfullyintoxicated @mariamagica @nanahuatli @didem-dg @yooshixlucy @pokebe @princeforestfox @prisoner-of-cerebrum: We don’t talk that often but when we do I really appreciate getting your messages :) I basically met all of you via the MM fandom and I’m really grateful to know you. Getting to know you has brightened up my life and I hope we keep in touch into 2018 :D

@The MM Server by @chaoticstarblossoms: I joined you guys only several days ago but I’m really happy I did. You’re all so friendly and welcoming and, for someone who’s kinda shy when it comes to big groups, I’m pleasantly surprised by how quickly I came to feel a part of the server. Not only me but you take any new member under the wing right from the start with warmth and it’s just really awesome! I hope to get to know you guys more and to join in with more shenanigans in the next year. Thank you for having me ^-^

@The MM fandom: Thank you so much for welcoming me with open arms. I created my first MM fanart at the start of 2017, not really expecting to draw much more than that for the rest of the year. Well pffftttsjfsehjerhej I did a rough count and would you believe that I’ve drawn 100+ MM-related and 50+ BNHA-related pics in the past 11 months?? 8D This is a huge deal to me because previously I drew maybe 10 pics on average per year. I was unmotivated, uninspired and pretty hopeless back then. But MM was the spark I needed and you guys became the fuel that keeps me going. It gives me life when I read your comments in the tags and reblogs. It also gives me life to see what you’ve created and shared. I have awed, laughed, cried and suffered over fanart, fanfics, edits, memes etc. You’re all inspiring and you gave me a place to belong. Thank you.

@my followers: What can I say...thank you for actually hitting that follow button. I don’t even know why you would tbh. There is practically no consistency to my posts - I’m not creating any long-term comics and I don’t just draw one thing, like strictly painting MM or BNHA. And also I don’t think my ideas are all that popular in the grand scheme of things. It sometimes makes me feel a little insecure but that’s a whole other topic for another time.

I just gotta say this - you guys give me hope as an artist. Before I came to Tumblr I was on Deviantart and my stuff largely went by unnoticed for quite a few years. It gave me the impression that nobody cared about my art and that it would never reach anyone because the things I draw aren’t the things a lot of people cared about. But you guys proved to me that it can reach someone. And not just someone but several someones. I really can’t believe that nearly 2k of you actually like what I create. Even though I draw silly and strange things you still chose to follow me. Thanks to you all, for the first time I feel that I can make something of myself as an artist. And that is more than I could ever ask for.

To the newer followers, welcome to my shithole. To the older veterans, thank you for sticking with me. I hope you’ll all stick with me for a long time yet but if you have to go then thanks for the time you’ve spent with me. Ultimately, thank you for instilling some much needed confidence in me. I still have a long way to go and so much to learn and improve on. But if there’s one thing I wanna do going forward it is to put more of myself into my creations. For someone who’s kinda shy on social media, I guess I just want to show more of myself as a person through my stuff. Whether that means more crack or something serious, well...who knows. Either way, I hope that you’ll continue to enjoy my art in the coming year :) 

Thank you once again for being with me.

TL;DR @Everyone mentioned here: Thank you for giving me the best gifts of 2017 - love, friendship, laughter, confidence and hope. I’ll wrap this up by wishing you all a fabulous year ahead. Let’s work hard and make it happen in 2018 <3333

#art summary 2017 #art summary #dragonpigeondraws #really sappy and sentimental stuff under the keep reading tag #aimed at pretty much everyone - friends | MM fandom | my followers #it's pretty long so feel free to skip #kjsehrksthsejkhtsejk #i don't usually do long wordy posts but i had things to say lolol #I hope nobody reads >.> <.<

[eunych-born-eunych]

tell us more about witchcraft tumblr

oh boy. follow @alkaloidwitch​ for my unironic witchcraft opinions. I’m a witch! and a materialist with a background in empiricism/scientism, also a materialist in the marxist dialectical sense! you can be all of those things at the cost of your popularity among idealist witches, non-witch materialists, and most of all:

Normies.

my materialism and my witchcraft both grow out of madness; human beings are computers complex enough to perceive things that are not real. For things I know to be real, there is materialism; for things I know to be chimerical, there is witchcraft. as the chaos magicians, wankers that they are, put it: belief is a tool. believing something now may serve a purpose, even if you do not intend to continue believing it later. Playing make-believe with my literal demons now will help me try to make sense of the material world better later.

And it is imaginative play, much as it is deadly serious; much of what we do in life is imaginative play of some kind. let’s pretend there’s a thing called money and let’s pretend it belongs to this specific kind of paper, these specific bits of metal. let’s pretend a corporation is a person. let’s pretend sex is simple; no, let’s pretend sex and gender are different; no, let’s pretend to stop believing in gender and start pretending to believe in ungendered sex.

materialism, again, is the resolution. imaginative play doesn’t have to be bad, but things that are only imaginary play by certain rules; we learn them as children. so when your imaginative play, witchcraft, seeps into your view of the world (as it must), other people calling themselves witches are sometimes going to believe or imagine mutually-contradicting things; the politest way to resolve an imaginary conflict is to come up with some imaginary solution, the more minimal the possible, and stop talking about that because it’s gonna harsh yr witchcraft to get snippy.

entirely different things happen when people come, materially, into conflict. and witch tumblr frustrates me a lot because my tacit acknowledgement that

“none of this is real like rocks are real, so when your imaginary collides with the material world, the material world is always going to trump. if it is materially bad, I don’t care that your imaginary justifies it, and if it is entirely immaterial there’s no point arguing about it”

…is not super popular with tumblr witches. there’s lots of, like, arguments and discourse and positivity posts about the wildest shit.

a three-screens-of-scroll witch tumblr textpost: positivity post for lazy witches! uwu // • positivity for lazy witches who [emoji-capped bullet points all the way down]me: it’s so inspiring that lazy witches can be positive despite the incredible scrutiny and terrible hardships the morning people witches subject them to, ⭐⭐⭐⭐🌟

so, like, I don’t have the same reaction to the idea of demon apologia that OP did. thinking highly of demons just isn’t that uncommon in my circles. to me, that post’s fucking ridiculous because why would you ever bother making it? if you wanna work with demons, do it, but like… other people don’t like demons, and make their own witchblr posts from that perspective, and you can resolve that conflict by just ignoring the imaginary content that is not meant for you.

a clarifying example is in order.

‘don’t use sigils you find on the internet, anyone can upload a curse and say it’s a different spell!!’

my guy. that is so far from being anybody’s real, substantive problem. you would never know unless they told you. their imaginary isn’t accessible to you and you can ignore it. if someone tells you they made a sigil you used to be a curse, and you feel like you have indeed been cursed, that’s still an event internal to you. and after all, someone could lie and tell you their beneficial sigil was actually a curse after you’ve already used it, just to fuck with you.

I can’t get this level of panicked about that level of made-up problem! if the idea of curses hidden in graphics created by random Internet denizens appealed to me, I’d engage with it on my own and not waste time trying to convince other people they should care about my niche paranoia.

the thing is, cultural appropriation is way less imaginary than witchcraft. there’s a real, economic impact to the mass-production in the West of symbols indigenous to ‘exotic’ colonies. there is a real dehumanization involved in treating someone’s proudest and most mundane garments, alike, as being a gaudy costume purchasable cheaply from any two-bit metaphysical store.

(privilege claim for the next bit: I’m a white, American settler-colonialist. that’s a me. I’m a that.)

and on the subject of metaphysical stores…

… run by white settler-colonialists who claim to have spirit animals and have no sense that there might be something inappropriate about shopping for toys in the cultures and religious practices of living indigenous populations whose homeland we are still occupying by force, whose access to their own cultural history we are still actively sabotaging, to sell bastardized sweatshop lookalikes whose significance is less than half-remembered and wholly stripped of context to other white settler-colonialists

there’s endless newb questions in this form:

Q: “can I use this color candle to mean this thing?”A: “I don’t care?”[a reblog insisting that actually they CAN’T use that color candle to mean this thing is the version that went viral]

, which indicates extreme hesitancy to break the rules of the imaginary.

on the other hand, witch tumblr is actively resistant to any demonstrable criticism. these same people fretting about candle colors also throw bizarre tantrums mocking the concept that they should stop cleansing with smoke from white sage, a critically endangered sacred herb that isn’t farmed, and how dare you say they shouldn’t call their white ass waving burning herbs in the air on occupied land ‘smudging’.

no-one cares if you think about the candle differently; stop asking for our input on that shit, because you don’t need it and we have better things to do. on the other hand, people very much do care if you engage in the alt religious scene’s rampant bigotry, but you don’t wanna listen to us on that. those priorities are fucked.

also witch communities have long, long memories, and some things happen again and again. a sampling:

the annoying

‘fluffy bunnies’ who read one barely-researched pop-Wicca text and are here to tell non-Wiccan witches what they’re doing wrong.

relatedly, ‘curse-shaming’, a practice in which even ‘respectable’ Wiccans participate, is genuinely aggravating if you’re at all into, like, historical witchcraft, because for a very long time (Wicca under that name had no public presence before 1954) there’s been not much more traditional for a witch than a curse.

arguments about “male witches” (that no-one acknowledges arose out of transmisogynistic practices in Dianic Wicca, and not really in reaction to men).

‘the Burning Times’ (not real, any historical events embarrassingly misrepresented).

“Easter is a pagan holiday;” relatedly, “Easter is Eostre is Ishtar”.

“Christmas is a pagan holiday.”

the ugly

an entire alt-history of Europe and European magical practice in which Jewish people play no perceptible part.

neo-Nazi physiognomies being passed around as “correspondence charts”.

every reputable resource on Norse mythology, Heathenry, or Asatru has an explicit public disavowal of Nazis, for very good reasons.

anti-Black propaganda, dated to the sixteenth century, about Afro-Carribbean syncretist esoteric/religious practices being repeated with all explicit reference to race left out on Tumbler Dot Com in 2017.

gentiles doing Kabbalah.

an all-white vision of the Hellenistic Mediterranean.

that one girl who stole black people’s bones from burst/eroded graves in a Louisiana graveyard and posted about it on Tumblr (one of witchblr’s few big mainstream crossover posts), leading to her arrest.

the (mostly) harmlessly bizarre

god-marriage

god-phones

what is a familiar really? (& relatedly: sex with spirits. EXTREMELY traditional, by the way),

etsy shops where you can buy custom spirits (NOT as in alcohol),

chemically-treated quartz named as if it was a real mineral,

“correspondence charts” broken alphabetically into individual readmore posts listing the magical properties of various objects (with a reblog later on in the chain complaining that people need to be more obsessed with pointless minutiae)

minors-only witchcraft discord server drama that you’re actively, unsuccessfully trying to avoid learning about

looking for witchcraft podcasts that aren’t run entirely by dudes

“my dog is horrifyingly sick, what spell should I cast?”//”GO TO THE VET”

a wealth of incredibly shitty and boring and unreadable esoteric PDFs by snake-oil salesmen

skyclad discourse

my tarot cards just read me for filth

thirty-year-old woman who should know better by now: christian witch is an oxymoron

christian witchblr: the Law of Attraction is just the prosperity gospel for Democrats

someone’s angry about the existence of secular witchcraft again

#madz #witchblr exposé #asks #j0ules

[ecotone99]

[RF] The New Norm - Part 1

“It’s two fucking wires!”, Virgil said to Lucky who was digging for worms.

“We need worms if we’re gonna eat,” Luck replied without looking up.

The two of them arrived here about a year ago when the virus finally tipped the scales and there was no looking back. The Covid-19 virus started as a local health issue in the Wuhan province of China. The world halfassly paid attention as the news story went from being a closing story to becoming a lead after the virus had jumped ship, via international travel, and became a global pandemic in six short weeks. The scariest thing about it was it’s incubation rate and how fatal it was. Four to eight week without showing signs of infection and a 90% mortality rate. Scary was being generous.

“I’m fucking sick of pike,” Virgil said while digging through dirt and mud. It’d been raining for two days and everything held the water in it, even the air.

“Life will change once we can harvest the garlic and onions,” Lucky replied while threading a long, fat worm out of a lump of soft clay. And we’re good for water for a while now. The tarps and drums are really working well now.”

“Well aren’t you Oscar Optimist this morning,” Virgil retorted in mild irritation. “What put you in such a stellar mood?”

“Garlic and onions aren’t ready to harvest but I did find something that was.” Without looking up, Luck reached into the breast pocket of his battered army coat and slid out half a very fat, very respectable joint.

“You fucker! And exactly when were you planning on telling me?” Virgil dusted his hands on his camo cargo pants. Lucky tossed him the half dube and his zippo.

“You know,” he said with a grin. “You rarely take into consideration my entertainment.”

Virgil, squatting on his haunches shook his head slowly, his smile growing ear to ear. “We gotta find something better when the munchies kick in.”

“We could raid the old man again. He’ll be asleep by nine. Maybe find something interesting. I was also thinking we should start planting berries. Strawberries, raspberries, blueberries. That sort of thing.”

Virgil exhales deep lungfuls of smoke, “Agreed. But blueberries are a fucking bitch to grow. Cherry tomatoes make a good snack though. Idiots can grow them too.”

“Says a lot about us,” Luck said and taking the offered joint. His intense eyes wandered over the scenery. Couldn’t really be much better. The ‘old man’ was a retired horse farmer and a multi-millionaire to boot. When the ‘dynamic duo’ agreed it was time to get out of Dodge, finding this place was a chance in a million. Before the global servers went tits up, they were looking for a place in the woods, far from civi, at the end of a road.

“Doesn’t ‘the end of the road’ sound a little fucking ominous to you?” Virgil commented.

“That’s why nobody’s gonna go there” was Lucky’s logic. Actually, over the past year it seemed to become Lucky’s Logic.

So they took everything they assumed they’d needed, which for Virgil was a lot, packed it in Luck’s pickup and drove east out of the city and hoped for the best.

What they found was beyond their wildest dreams. Hundreds of acres of forest, with lakes, rivers and pastures. The old man had two barns which held about fifty horses which he cared for by himself. Fiery old guy, up at 5:00 and in bed at 21:00, never stopping all day to tend the farm. After about a month living there, Virgil and Lucky approached the old man to offer assistance in return for lodging and the single buckshot pellet that blew through Virgil’s shin still hurt when the weather changed. So much for diplomacy.

Now lying in the dirt together, both supremely surprised by the potency of Luck’s harvest, Virgil was back at it.

“It’s two fucking wires!” he exclaimed with as much vigor as his addled mind could muster, which, admittedly, wasn’t very much.

Lucky was consumed by the beauty of the rolling clouds strolling gently through the mesmerizing sky which wasn’t very mesmerizing at all.

“What?” he mumbled.

“Two fucking wires! He’s got about a billion watts of solar power down there. He’s not gonna notice if we nick a little of it.”

“What?”, Lucky eloquently retorted.

“There’s about a billion feet of wire in the big barn. We can steal a plug socket and a case, take the wire we need and bury it from here to the power relay he uses to heat his indoor pool. Then we just connect the two wires to the relay and have more electricity than we can ever use. Where’s the downside?”

Lucky thought he saw elephants in the clouds.

Virgil was on his back, trying to work out the math for his latest plan. “And if you say ‘What?’ again I’m gonna… fuck it. I can think of a lot of things to finish that sentence but I doubt I can even stand up right now. How the fuck did you grow that so strong?!??

“What?”

That night found them putting at a joint and reviewing ‘the mission’. With no security whatsoever, it was easy to steal the wire, the plug socket and a shovel for the next mission. Night time in this new normal was pitch black, with the moon and the stars serving as the only source of light. The barn was huge. Like two football fields huge.

The biggest problem was making sure the horses didn’t wake up. Especially while Virgil was humming the theme from Mission Impossible.

Lucky was at the door of the tack room, where the old man kept all the horse stuff, saddles, bridles, carrots. His eyes scanning for anything but knowing full well, from past experience, that there was nothing to scan for. He literally could have been walking around naked with a headlight strapped to his forehead.

“Can you stop humming that fucking song?” he whispered, not wanted to alarm the horses. “This is about as far from impossible as taking a shit.”

Virgil would have no part of Lucky’s Logic. He continued to hum away. Luck just rolled his eyes. Virgil had cut off the length of wire they needed at what he calculated to be about 300 feet. But 300 feet of triple strand copper wire weighs about 100 pounds so they split it in two to share the burden.

“When’s the last time you went upstairs,” Virgil asked.

“I don’t know,” Luck whispered back. “Just after we got here I think.”

“Wanna go have a peek? We’re not here often these days,” Virgil asked.

Lucky weighed the worth of his friend’s curiosity. “Peek for what?” he asked.

“I don’t know. Who knows what the old man has up there. It’s not like we’re in a rush. And I was also thinking on the way back we take a quick look for any munchies in his fridge.” Virgil shot Luck the grin that always made him shake his head and smile. “C’mon, man! What else have we got to do?”

After getting the wire and shovel in a wheelbarrow they were about to steal they both ninja’d their way back into the barn and up the stairs that lead to the apartment above the barn meant for the farmhand to live in. It was completely dark and Virgil clicked on his flashlight for a second.

“Turn that off!” Lucky forcefully whispered. “I can’t see a thing now!” Virgil knew Luck was talking about how regular light fucked up a human's innate ability to see in the dark.

Virgil, mentally agreeing with his friend, was also content that turning on his flashlight kept him from stepping on one of the numerous barn cats. He clicked it off plunging them both back to the invisible abyss.

Virgil found the door at the top of the stairs and silently twisted the knob which didn’t twist at all.

“Fuck,” he hissed. “It’s fucking locked.”

Lucky reached into his shitty canvas bag and gave Virgil the worn lockpick set he’d had since high school. Virgil had the door open in 10 seconds. The apartment was surprisingly renovated. Brand new everything, granite counter tops, solid wood kitchen cabinets, hardwood floors. Both quietly looked in every cabinet, every drawer.

Above the stainless steel fridge, Virgil let out a low whistle.

“What?” Lucky asked.

“Imma turn on the flashlight for sec, okay?” Virgil asked.

Luck shielded his eyes. “Just for a sec.”

Virgil clicked the flashlight on then off after 2 seconds. Then he started giggling.

“What?” Luck whispered again.

“It’s a 60.” Virgil offered.

“Of what?” Lucky asked

“Looks like our old friend”

“Jack?”

“Yep,” Virgil replied. “Jack Daniels is joining us for dinner.”

Lucky then began giggling too. “Fuck yeah!”

“I’m just gonna check the bathroom then we head out,” Virgil whispered after giving the bottle to Lucky.

“Sounds good”.

Virgil inched his way to the bathroom, hoping beyond hope, he’d secure some toilet paper. You can’t understand what the quality of life is when you don’t have toilet paper. The moonlight was peeking through the patio door and when Virgil got to the bathroom what he saw gave him pause for thought. There was tape across the door like you’d see in a police investigation.

“Luck!” he whispered silently. “What do you make of this?”

Lucky didn’t really care much. Though the thought of having a 60 of Jack Daniels AND toilet paper seemed to immediately become abundantly important.

“I don’t know,” he replied. “Just go have a quick peek”

This seemed to give Virgil the confidence he needed and he opened the door and stepped in.

What surprised him most as he stepped through the door was the towering pile of toilet paper he saw on the shelf at the edge of his vision. For a split second. Having a doctorate in mechanical engineering, his brain, in lightning-fast realization, determined that the tape on the door was to keep people out of the bathroom because the floor was being replaced and the only thing covering the beams meant to hold the new floor was paper. He disappeared from Lucky’s view in a split second. He was there and then he was gone. His crash to the floor below was surprisingly muted because he landed on hay. Hay for the stallion in the stable in which Virgil now found himself.

For anyone who knows anything about horses, the stallion is, by far, one of the most fearsome and dangerous animals on the planet. They’re purpose is to breed. Horse farmers purposely prevent this from happening until it’s time to happen. So you essentially have a horse, fully 1500 pounds, that is so angry because he’s horny as fuck standing four feet from Virgil. Add to this that the irate animal was sleeping and doesn’t take kindly to being shocked awake and you have a very unpleasant environment for Virgil to find himself in. And to really put the final nail in the coffin, the stable is, of course, locked from the outside.

The braying and snorting of the animal a floor below him quickly brought Lucky’s attention from the 60 in his backpack to his friend in mortal danger. Still feeling the effects of the weapons-grade weed he grew, he bounded, then fell down the stairs. Sadly, he had to admit, that when tumbling down the stairs his first thought was not of saving his friend but of hoping that the 60 didn’t break as he barreled, head first, into the wall at the base of the stairs.

As Lucky scrambled back to his feet and into the stables, Virgil was fairing far worse than his potential rescuer. The stallion was now fully awake and fully pissed at the intrusion to his miserable existence. Virgil knew well enough to not get behind the beast, his scientific mind knowing that a horse kick approached 2000 pounds per square inch. What he had never learned was that while avoiding the powerful kicks he did not realize that horses bite. He also was unaware that a stallion can easily bite off a human arm completely. So, in hindsight, he had to admit that he was happy, well, less miserable, when the horse decided that he could neutralize his invader by biting its head. Just as Virgil was uselessly trying to hold the stallion’s head, and teeth, away from his, Lucky opened the stable gate and punched the horse squarely in the eye. The result was madness. The stallion reeled up and brayed loud enough to wake the other horses who clearly felt the need to support their breeding seed and began to make noises loud enough to wake the dead. Including the old (but not quite dead) man.

Virgil and Lucky zipped through the stable gate, locked the door, and bolted to their bounty of wire. And a shovel. Watching the farm lights come on in horror, they ran, full sprint for over an hour, down the dirt road and up the hill to their camp. Exhausted, battered and bruised and pumping on adrenaline, they both lay sprawled on their backs.

“Two fucking wires!”, Luck exhaled.

Virgil reached into Lucky’s battered backpack and pulled out the 60.

“Shots?” he asked without raising his head.

And they both lay on the ground, covered in mud and horse shit, and couldn’t stop laughing.

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[sassybinchesinc]

Nobody ever sends me asks when I do this shit but I feel like revealing everything about my life so I’m just going to answer everything like those annoying Facebook posts lol MAKE ME ADMIT STUFFFF 1. Would you have sex with the last person you text messaged? Considering I’m currently in a fwb type thing with him, absolutely 2. You talked to an ex today, correct? No but I did yesterday 3. Have you taken someones virginity? Not that I know of 4. Is trust a big issue for you? Yes! I’m a very trusting person so I expect at least close to the same level as trust 5. Did you hang out with the person you like recently? I’m not really sure if I actually “like someone” right now 6. What are you excited for? Tomorrow night because I’m seeing my fwb 7. What happened tonight? Just going to bed lol 8. Do you think it’s disgusting when girls get really wasted? No! However I think it’s absolutely revolting when anyone gets so drunk that they puke in something that’s not a toilet 9. Is confidence cute? It can be. Personally I like it when guys have confidence bc I find it sexy but it really depends on the kind of confidence for girls 10. What is the last beverage you had? Water 11. How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust? That’s a good question. I think I trust most of them unless they’ve given me a reason not to 12. Do you own a pair of skinny jeans? The only jeans I own are skinny jeans lol 13. What are you gonna do Saturday night? Probably nothing 14. What are you going to spend money on next? Probably food 15. Are you going out with the last person you kissed? No.. 16. Do you think you’ll change in the next 3 months? Hopefully. There’s a lot I need to change right now 17. Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything? Bizzy! 18. The last time you felt broken? Pretty recently. 19. Have you had sex today? No. 20. Are you starting to realize anything? Maybe. I hope I’m wrong tho 21. Are you in a good mood? I’m currently kind of frustrated 22. Would you ever want to swim with sharks? Would I want to? Yes would I ever? No 23. Are your eyes the same color as your dad’s? Yes 24. What do you want right this second? To be cuddling with austin 25. What would you say if the person you love/like kissed another girl/boy? I’m completely over him so I’d be fine 26. Is your current hair color your natural hair color? No. Honestly I’m not sure what my natural hair color is anymore 27. Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh? No I wouldn’t. Mostly because literally anything can make me laugh 28. What was the last thing that made you laugh? Probably some dumb fucking picture 29. Do you really, truly miss someone right now? Yes I think I do... 30. Does everyone deserve a second chance? Sure. 31. Honestly, do you hate the last boy you were talking to? no not at all! 32. Does the person you have feelings for right now, know you do? they might idk if I even know if I like them 33. Are you one of those people who never drinks soda? no. But I do try to mostly drink water 34. Listening to? POPPY! 35. Do you ever write in pencil anymore? unless I'm at work or I need to use pen for a test I always use pencil 36. Do you know where the last person you kissed is? yes. He's at his home 37. Do you believe in love at first sight? idk maybe. I've never experienced it tho 38. Who did you last call? my mom 39. Who was the last person you danced with? My friend Amanda at her sorority formal 40. Why did you kiss the last person you kissed? He's a great kisser and I like doing it 41. When was the last time you ate a cupcake? Like Sunday? 42. Did you hug/kiss one of your parents today? No 😞 I live like 3 hours away from both of them 43. Ever embarrass yourself in front of a crush? All I ever do is embarrass myself in front of anyone so yes 44. Do you tan in the nude? No 45. If you could, would you take back your last kiss? not at all 46. Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night? no. Unfortunately he ALWAYS falls asleep first 47. Who was the last person to call you? my brother Matthew 48. Do you sing in the shower? of my roommates not home 49. Do you dance in the car? yes. And sing LOUD 50. Ever used a bow and arrow? Yes in middle school PE 51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer? senior year pictures 52. Do you think musicals are cheesy? some of them are but I LOVE them 53. Is Christmas stressful? it can be but I always try to just enjoy myself 54. Ever eat a pierogi? yes 55. Favorite type of fruit pie? Apple 56. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid? astronaut! Or inventor 57. Do you believe in ghosts? no 58. Ever have a Deja-vu feeling? yes 59. Take a vitamin daily? no 60. Wear slippers? very rarely 61. Wear a bath robe? again, very rarely 62. What do you wear to bed? usually a tshirt and shorts or a pair of panties 63. First concert? umm some weird old band that played at my county fair 64. Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart? target. 65. Nike or Adidas? Nike 66. Cheetos Or Fritos? cheetos 67. Peanuts or Sunflower seeds? sunflower seeds 68. Favorite Taylor Swift song? I really like 22 and wildest dreams and dear john 69. Ever take dance lessons? no 70. Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing? something business-y 71. Can you curl your tongue? I think so. 72. Ever won a spelling bee? no. I think the only one I've ever been in is The 25th annual Putnam county spelling bee lol 73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy? I've cried from laughing too hard if that counts 74. What is your favorite book? that's tricky... I honesty can't say. 75. Do you study better with or without music? without. I wish I could study with music but I get to mo distracted singing 76. Regularly burn incense? no 77. Ever been in love? I thought I was when I was 17 but looking back I probably wasn't 78. Who would you like to see in concert? poppy lol. Bo burnham 79. What was the last concert you saw? I don't really go to concerts lol 80. Hot tea or cold tea? hot tea. Iced tea has to be sweet tea 81. Tea or coffee? tea 82. Favorite type of cookie? Oreo thins or thin mints 83. Can you swim well? yes! 84. Can you hold your breath without holding your nose? yes 85. Are you patient? Im a server so I kind of have to be 86. DJ or band, at a wedding? Dj 87. Ever won a contest? I got 2nd place at s tennis tourney a couple of times. 88. Ever have plastic surgery?