#yea im not sure its done like this

[elysiarte]

#yea im not sure its done like this #idk how to do this #i tried lmao #anw PLS GOO WATCH GOMENS S2 #WE DESPERATELY NEED A S3 #good omens #good omens s2 #good omens s2 spoilers #michael sheen #david tennant #aziraphale #crowely

[suntails]

the weight of family and the pull of gravity

#those are song lyrics listen im running out of dramatic one liners to use as captions HGFJKD #i like the DRAMA!! the DEVASTATION!!!! if it doesnt feel fitting to the emotional weight i feel then i will DISINTEGRATE ON THE SPOT #the pic looks more saturated as i post it than it does in photoshop so hmmmgh not sure how the balance will be? c'est la vie it's j for me #u can rip those fuckign birds from my cold dead hands. i wont give them up. sleepie made fun of me for my bird motifs BUT I LIKE THEM #I NEEDED THEM FOR THE COMP IT GGRGAGAHAHHH #twst #twisted wonderland #twst silver #silver vanrouge #twst spoilers #ch 7 spoilers #oh yea i wanna make an animatic to that song once ch7 is done. maybe.. i fucking HATE making animatics but its SOOOOO SILVER #blame lettie its her fault #suntails

[doctorwhoisadhd]

who in the torchwood team would hate nardole the most.

#torchwood #doctor who #nardole #dr who #dw #cannot figure it out #the one (1) thing im sure of is this: andy and nardole would get along SO well. they would LOVE each other. they meet like‚ ONE time in the #presence of at least one torchwood team member & like INSTANTLY hit it off in the background while whoever it is investigates smth and when #theyre done they come back to find nardole nd andy having a very quietly intense discussion abt smth extremely mundane & the team member #is like that photo of ben affleck with a cigarette. & then gwen finds out later that nardole and andy meet up every week to play mah-jong #also nardole would NOT fuck andy theyre just friends. and both of them get defensive if anyone ever suggests it. #in particular nardoles response is: (in a high and mighty tone of voice) 'actually. i dont sleep with cops thank you.' andys like 'whats #that supposed to mean' (a little offended) and nardoles like 'no a-dog its just a bit too messy for me‚ what with the legal system and all. #i dont do lawyers either. beyond clingy you know how it is' and andys like 'yea you know what thats reasonable i guess' #ari opinion hour #also andy DOES NOT KNOW THIS but thats the only thing preventing nardole from trying to fuck him like a bird doing one of those #weird ass mating displays. thank god for this also because it means we are all spared from whatever That would be (which‚ awkward‚ mostly) #ALSO YES NARDOLE WOULD HAVE A NICKNAME FOR ANDY BY THE END OF THAT FIRST CONVERSATION. IT WOULD BE SO FUNNY.

[eyndr-stories]

Everyone needs to see him. I’ve sent him to all my friends. I sent him to my brother. I sent him to my aunt. I’ll show him to my therapist. Now he is here,

catboy mobster

#im so fucking happy about him. one of the best things ive ever drawn #he’s a maine coon!!! beeg fluffy boy #kibbits i am giving you a big fat looney tunes smooch #thank you for this mental image. i could not rest until he was done #i’m queing him and going straight to bed fhgkhjfjd #eyndr does art #oc #i guess?? yea??? yes he is a new character djkhhjjdf no idea if i’ll ever draw him again #but good golly i sure do love him #he needs a name so i can tag him hang on #mr coon??? not only is he a maine coon but purhaps he also runs a tycoon djgkhjfdg #first name.. Vito #vito like vitality cause cats have 9 lives :] #oc vito coon #catboy #mobster #catboy mobster #idk what else to tag this with its 4am im too sleepy for this fjhkdhdjg i used my last braincell on his name

[a-gay-little-cat]

walking in to rephrase my thoughts from discord but i was just thinking about tiger getting checked up by his ripper n yknow one could consider tiger a 'borg in cyberpunks terms sure hes not super insane looking like smasher, he likes looking human and theres almost an art to having all these enhacements and reinforcements all neatly tucked away for no one to see yes you have the obvious visible cyberware on his face, his body, the tail but its nowhere near as extreme as you see elsewhere at times, hell, look at someone from maelstrom

all in all he looks.. tame, very stylized sure but you might not exactly expect this all going on in there

#theres definitely a humm to him when its real quiet and you rest your head on his chest #would usually hear the cyberware idling #n sure... something to be said about cyberpsychosis or what have you but i think the way its done in lore is kind of. lame #i like to imagine it with alittle more nuance #highly dependant on the person and how fast you install it all #i think after a certain point yes your body or mind cannot handle any more but theres more fun ways to show this #that arent just super murdering everyone #tiger is a big guy without all of that tech. hes built and healthy so i think that sets a higher baseline #more space to build on and more options to push further up #without him being in any danger #and all of this cyberware was installed gradually over years with his ripper's watchful eye #making sure it all works #doesnt conflict or affect tiger negatively #and yea i admit it. its overpowered perhaps. but im playing touys and if theres someone like smasher looking like that being perfectly fine #well. tiger is allowed #tiger #my ocs #i also think its just a fun aspect to have this mechanical noise alongside the organic heartbeat

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#ever sit like a corpse in your own body? #im doing a job i wasnt designed for. theres this funny thing we do in academia where we beg for money. write in consise phrasing why we #deserve funding. what it is about our project what it is about our personhood that makes us deserving. what we're doing in our present to #give back and ensure a better future. and i can pull together a description of a nervous kid who couldn't read but loved to learn anyway. #who didnt kno how to hold proper a conversation until college and so tried and got better at ppl. who wouldnt let a language problem get in #the way of information gain. who cares about making complicated info visually digestible. and that's a nice story. but it falls apart when #projected into the future. what r u doing for the future? im just trying to continue existing #dont u want to help other ppl like u? sure but i dont have anything nice to say to them. does it ever get easier? no. it probably never will #ur brain was not built for reading. sometimes things r just terrible and u have to accept that. develop a crippling mental disorder or do #something where u dont have to read. see. not helpful. bad attitude. im just too full of blood and broken glass. all my achievements r #stained red and it hurts to look at them. to get myself to function i have to squeeze so tight i can feel the strain in my head. and even #then its not enough. do u kno what its like to spend ur whole life building something only to watch it burn to ashes in front of u? just a #broken machine rotting away underground where no one will see it. but dont let things fester. speak up if somethings wrong. and say what? #lmao i wrote this last night and then today when my advisor was like: hows it going? do u feel like u have enough time to get everything #done? and i had the gall to be like *voice strained high to prevent crying* its alright i think ive got enough time. bc yea technically i #think there r enough hours in yhr day that if i really tried i could get it all done. but that doesn't count the time i spend laying with #thr absolute desolation of my mind. so no. there isnt enough time bc im not doing well. but there's nothing he can do abt it so ya kno #whats the point in talking abt it except to say ya sorry im such a wretched miserable person. i dont kno how to fix it. my enthusiasm is #hidden under layer upon layer of pain. i burnef out before even getting here and im only making it worse #but whatever ill see my therapist Tuesday #unrelated

[ark1os]

.

I didnt know the tags woulr be so much i shouldve just wrote a long vent 😭😭😭 rip

#lol. there are still times where my brain goes omg what if you’re really a narc #and then i go out of my way to make sure my friends are as comfortable as possible and thati meet all their needs and i apologize every few #minutes for something silly or for maybe hurting them unintentionally and then i remember of #every fallout w people in my life where i was always taking responsibility for my actions n for my role to what led to the fallouts no #matter how toxic the person was and i remember all the times i geniunely apologized to my siblings for my mistakes (without them pointing #out i did smth wrong) and i remember all the tomes someone told me i hurt them and i owned up to it and apologized and then i go #oh ywa. maybe not ? #bonus: all the times i helped someone out in secret to bring some ease in their life without ever telling them or bragging eith it or #using it against them or reminding them that i did x y z for them #and then all the times where my guilt ate me up at nights and i cried and the times where i brought out the best of people because my love #is Nuturing. yea #AND I GUESS THE FACT THAT MY EX BEST FRIEND TOLD ME IM A NARC AND I STRAIGHT UP WENT OMG YEA! PROBABLY! BECAUSE I WOULDVE BELIEVED HER #ANYTHING 😭😭😭😭 BECAUSE INWAS SO SURE SHE KNEW ME BETTER THAN I KNEW MYSELF! 😭😭😭 #BECAUSE I HAD LOST MYSELF COMPLETELY IN THE FRIENDSHIP 😭😭😭😭 NOT VERY NARC OF ME 😭😭😭😭😭😭 #but yea. i guess abandonment issues apathy and lack of communication skills (which leads to passive aggressivness) will make you look like a #narc i get where she came from! but still. if i ever see someone diagnose other people i will simply tell them to shut up #especially based on sentences taken out of context. not very sexy #and also very stupid. #rationally seen i shouldve kicked out the thought that im probably not one when my therapist told me theres no chance i am but. when you get #treated like a freaking mondter from the people you’ve trusted deeply. it does something to you >.> #also when my therapist said that she has No rights to make Any diagnosis or statements about other people because whatever i tell her its #going to tell her more about me than them. i shouldve just dtopped believing it honestly. like freaking sideeye to those therapists thst #told my ex friends im a narc. and a big fat kiss to my therapist for being such a beautiful empathstic underztanding patient beautiful and #kind person #alhamdulillah ^-^ #kicked out the thought thst i am one * #and also a big fat sorry for being hsving no empathy. my communication skills are getting brtter and im working on my abandonment issues #(sfter being abandoned by my closest friends and family hello this is so sexy of me) and im soooo much more st peace w myself n i like and #care aboyt myself ^-^ even just writing a list of positive things ahout me is smth i wouldve never done two years ago #(also my family took me back alhamdulillah eheh)

[medicasino]

palia fandom i am so sorry in advance for what i'm about to do when i get the will to draw . (Jel babygirl pose)

#affie txt #i want to draw like normal fanart of him too because i ADORE him. but . yea h. #i still need to play more palia and like. progress further with friendship #im still level 2 with Jel to my absolute dismay because im awful at gifting and the current thing he's asked for this week is. i dont know #where to find it . its an eyeless minnow and im not sure where to find it. rip #and romance is LEVEL 3 FRIENDSHIP AND ONWARDS ONLY </3 #i am speedrunning. #ANYWAYS yes im a homosexual but jel is absurdly gendery and a very pretty man #also i love him just in general like. his whole character. appeals to me so much #the silly #also he is SO transmasc to me. and bisexual but him being at least m-spec is basically canon considering the player isn't actually gendered #which is a BREATH OF FRESH AIR #OKAY IM DONE RAMBLING but #we need more jel content . #i also want to draw Jina Hassian and Reth as well!! they are also my favorites... #Kenyatta too!!!

[perihel1on]

too awake to nap, too asleeb to do shit. this is how chronic fatigue turned my life into a living hell

#chronic fatigue #i dont have cfs (afaik) (p sure) #but i have some sort of chronic fatigue issues #and im SOO tired of being tired !!! #like i want to get work done yea but also i just want to enjoy my hobbies and go outside and take good care of myself and shit #but im so so so so constantly eepy #i think its a combo of depression+bad sleep schedule partially caused by dspd+diabetes related low energy #but idk man #aphelion.txt

[cosmik-homo]

Like possibly hot take but I find the Thing with Fitz and. The Fiol, one could say, to be much MORE interesting held within a context that respects Fitzs historical social attitude and sexual politics. Im sorry if the guy that got lynched to death at 15 is a little weird about the idea of being contexualized as a homosexual in Medeval Public. And anyways treating their Unrequited Requited deal as the crazy one sided situation it is makes everything about Little Mx Gayboy Moth To The Flame Mount Rushmore Behavior 'Yeah I guess if i expected you to call me beloved I really am a fool' soo much more interesting. Honey I know you quite literally have to be here but for sure you can do this without hurting yourself so much. Right. Right. Wait not like that.

#yea i finished golden fool #obsessed with the fatherhood of it all. and the witted storyline had me sooooo #out of all the 800 page books i read where Literally Nothing At All Haplens this was the best one. love it please don't make me live throug #Events. #anyways im sitting the fool down to waych big eden like THIS IS WHAT WE DO WITH REPRESSED MIDDLE AGED FATHERS WHO PLAY W OUR FEELINGS OK #this is very aro behavior of me like of course its not something you can shke off or make good decisions about #i STILL get guilt dreams of my ex sometimes and i wasnt even in love w her rly. #but also Girl. girl. surely Some things can be done #or at least you can. again. not carve his exact face four foot tall on a seperate living being. for a face. while exclaiming love public

[perilegs]

just started fear & hunger, met d'arce, she talked about jesus 2.0, called me a peasant, and overall just seemed very nasty. as you may have guessed, im obsessed

#shes. so bad. a literal missionary. i know i shouldnt say this about a missionary but shes just a poor meow meow #havent even played her intro yet but im sure whatever horrible things she has done havent been her fault #also god why are all the playable characters so cunty #also i have GOT to cosplay either mercenary or the guy with a miniskirt so short you can probably see his cock and balls #also im having a BLAST with the game #yea i died about a billion times during the 3 hours i played it but it was so fun and theres so much stuff and cool things #theres things i really dont like or agree with but god its a good game #its better than what i thought it would b based on what ppl have said #a fucking solo dev game! #leevi liveblogs

[doodlebeeberry]

i like their religion

#this isnt done mostly cause im not sure i like it but i need to go to bed and i do want it to get posted at some point so. yea. #anyway i really do like their religion i think its fun. lost of candles lots of fire lots of god as the self #maybe ill explain it eventually at some point but idk if anyone would even wanna read that lmao #doodles #chaos gang #object oc #the drawing of sweetie is also tied to their religion btw just in a funkier way #funky isnt the word but you get what i mean

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#hhhhh 🫠 gotta love when instead of doing literally anything im stuck anxiously vibrating for hours #like if u just did things. things would get done! thats how this works! wtf r u doing??? #2 manuscripts that r supposed to be done now and 2 applications left to complete #my mum thinks i should let my boss kno thst my brain is collapsing in on itself and like yea i prob should bc i should apologize for being #all weird and disorganized. my brain feels so weird. like it takes so so much processing power for me to remember wtf i was doing and what #i have to do next but like if i tell her it wont really change anything bc its like i have to meet these deadlines either way #also i have to b careful bc i dont wanna say yea i got horrifically burned out taking measurements but like im sure itll be fine that i #have to go back to taking measurements in January. like no prob. weve only been building up to it all year #and i kno if i say im burned out she'll be like u gotta relax more! i told u to relax so we wouldnt b here! #and then i have to be like no u dont fucking understand that i cant relax. i never relax. my life is a series of tasks and thinking abt #tasks and worrying forever. if u tell me to relax i will agony spiral for hours not relaxing and not being productive 🙃 #i just need my brain to allow me to focus long enough to get these fucking manuscripts done #but no my brain is like if u wanna do thing u gotta find the perfect audio but also i cant focus as well with audio but also i cant even #find the right thing to listen to anyway. and my brain is like u need one device playing media and 1 playing music #and like no stop. just fucking focus and stop falling apart #time time time not enough and far too much #its so weird bc i think im pretty level headed and self aware despite how my brain is sometimes. but it keeps doing this thing where #like everything gets so distorted and im like jesus its a good thing otherwise pretty grounded #blah tomorrow well see whst comes outta my mouth when i tslk to my boss #ugh im so tired whyyyyyyyyy #i cant even make proper time to draw #unrelated