veryfancyrat

[veryfancyrat]

So, if you follow theme park news, you may have heard that Disney is going to be ripping out the classic ride Dinosaur from their Animal Kingdom park, and replacing it with an Indiana Jones ride, likely similar to those in Anaheim and Tokyo.

Sorry, Aladar, you're getting evicted.

It seems that most theme park fans would like to see a new Indy ride, but some are upset about losing the dinosaurs.

The thing is... I think you can have both! There are plenty of pulpy adventure stories about a lost world of dinosaurs. In fact, I figured out one way they could do it efficiently... it's what I would do if I were in charge of Imagineering, anyway. You'll recognize most of these effects from other rides (and even some which are just left in place from Dinosaur.) I give you...

Indiana Jones and the Hollow Earth!

The experience begins just like Indiana Jones and the Temple of the Forbidden Eye (the ride out in California): We wind our way through the elaborately-themed queue as it passes through a jungle and into the shade of ancient ruins.

On the cool stone walls, we see Peruvian carvings depicting an enormous cave, where giant humanoid figures offer gifts to much smaller supplicants. But as we go deeper into the ruins, the carvings also begin to depict fearsome reptilian monsters. We come across artifacts which seem to be much too large to be made by regular humans: five-foot-long sandals, for instance, or a cracked soup bowl big enough to sit in. (These could make for good photo ops!)

Eventually, we end up in the safety briefing room, where Sallah informs us (via pre-recorded video) that while Indiana Jones was exploring this temple, he found an entrance to a vast system of subterranean caverns, full of larger-than-life plants and animals, seemingly forgotten by time itself! They go so deep that the researchers have begun joking that the planet must actually be hollow inside. Last week, Indy went in deeper than anyone has gone before, seeking evidence of the Staff of Giants: An artifact that, according to local legend, was forged by the mythically large people who once lived in the caverns, and holds the power to tame the mightiest beast. Unfortunately, Indy never returned from his expedition. Sallah is sure he's fine... wherever he is! But if we should happen to see Indy on our *very safe* private jeep tour of the pre-explored parts of the "Hollow Earth," we'll help him out, won't we?

We board the jeeps, which pass into a carved stone hallway, the walls lit by unnaturally large fluorescent fungi. Freshly-painted signs point out the tour route.

Suddenly, the vehicle shakes violently, and and the floor seems to crumble under us! The lights blink out as we lurch downward--and then out into a large natural cavern, where Indy stands spotlighted on a rock. He tells us that the floor caved in, and now we're all trapped in the Hollow Earth. We need to find a way out, and fast... the wildlife is BIG down here!

We roll from cavern to cavern, menaced by various threats. Enormous glowing bugs jump on rocks, and drop down on us from the branches of ancient trees. A carnotaurus lunges from behind a bush, defending its kill. A huge snake--perhaps a Titanoboa--threatens to strike at the jeep. A giant human skeleton lies sprawled in a clearing, its boney fingers still clutching an ornate silver staff. Its tip seems to crackle with electricity. "It's the Staff of Giants!" we hear Indy yell.

But beasts are not the only threat. Through the trees, in a quiet moment, we see the glimmering of a vast ocean, overshadowed by roiling clouds. Before we can wonder at the impossibility of a storm underground, the clouds begin to flash with lightning. Suddenly, a lightning bolt strikes the cliff next to the jeep, and boulders above us teeter menacingly.

We careen deeper and deeper into the caverns, until finally we come face to face with the carnotaurus again. Indy is there too, waving the staff we saw earlier, trying desperately to scare the carnotaurus away from the jeep. Suddenly, just as all seems lost, a bolt of electricity arcs from the staff and strikes the carnotaurus right on the nose. It rears back and roars in pain as we barrel past it to freedom.

Triumphant music plays as we enter the final cavern, only to see... a whole tribe of giants, accompanied by their pet dinosaurs! Indy is handing the staff to one of them, who gratefully receives the lost weapon. Happy giant children offer up crates of silver jewelry and dinosaur eggs in reward. One last giant strikes the cavern wall with his own staff, and mystical energy swirls, causing a door to open and release you back into the loading area, safe at last. Over the jeep radio, Indy says, "The folks back home will NEVER believe this one!"

Then you exit into the gift shop, where you can buy plushies of the "baby dinosaurs" you received from the giants.

No stealing the merch!

So... what do YOU think is going to be the plot of the new Indiana Jones adventure? I want to see who can come the closest to what we actually get!

#indiana jones #disneyland #animal kingdom #dinosaur #theme park #walt disney imagineering #armchair imagineering #indiana jones ride #dinosaur ride #disney world #hollow earth #carnotaurus #disney #disney parks #theme park ride

[veryfancyrat]

Netsuke of a Rat Grasping a Soybean Pod, early 19th century, Japan.

[veryfancyrat]

Jumping spider mimic barklouse, Psocoptera. Photographed in Singapore.

Comments from the photographer: The spots on the wings resemble the eyes of salticids (jumping spiders), and even with highlights. To top it off, it moves on tree trunks like a salticid.

Photos by Nicky Bay // Website // Facebook

Photos shared with permission - do not remove credit or re-post!

[veryfancyrat]

I was browsing through the taxidermy listings on the Goodwill auction website, as one does, and came across a vintage mink stole in decent condition. It looked nice, except that instead of a furrier's brand label, this tag was sewn into the collar:

Why? Who would do this? Is the stole actually itchy? And if so... how? Mink shouldn't be itchy! And what's with the "Chinese takeout menu from the 80s" font? Was some furrier, or obscure department store, trying to make a pun on their own itching-related name?

I am thoroughly befuddled.

#ThisGarmentGuaranteedToItch #mink #furs #vintage #itchy #fur stole #goodwill #vintage clothing

[veryfancyrat]

well life just isnt fucking fair is it humpback whale 85

[veryfancyrat]

[veryfancyrat]

Nobody actually wants a Willy Wonka prequel movie, do they? What we NEED is a Great Glass Elevator movie, packed with all the cosmic terror, body horror, and over-the-top political commentary of the original story. The kids who grew up on Among Us would love it.

No studio will ever touch it, though. Cowards.

#willy wonka #wonka #love me some Vermicious Knids #great glass elevator

[veryfancyrat]

[veryfancyrat]

Deer inner ear earrings I made for a friend!

Fun fact: I have to pop these guys out when I clean a skull in order to ensure I get everything out. They don’t get replaced since you won’t see/notice where they used to be.

I might start making more of these to sell! Thoughts?

ear earrings

[veryfancyrat]

Behold--my new pelvis earrings! I've been cleaning and bleaching the skeleton of an unfortunate squirrel that got run over near my apartment last year, and this is the result. I'm pretty happy with them: they're very light, and the quartzite beads I glued into the socket joint add a bit of color.

Now, what to do with the rest of the bones?

#jewelrymaking #vulture core #vulture culture #goth jewelry #bone collecting #animal bones #bone jewelry #earrings #tw bones #turquoise #squirrel #quartzite

[veryfancyrat]

Stop Jumping, Idiot.

[veryfancyrat]

Beeftongue has the shape and the volume

Beeftongue has the most mass

Beeftongue is the animal

[veryfancyrat]

I was bleaching the skeleton of a roadkilled squirrel I found last year, and I accidentally left it in the hydrogen peroxide for a bit too long... and the scapulae turned into these amazingly delicate butterfly wings:

I need to figure out how to turn these into something that highlights their beauty--earrings, perhaps? I wanted to try and articulate the whole skeleton, but the skull and a lot of the spine was too badly damaged to be saved.

#vulture culture #squirrel #animal bones #bones #bone jewelry #bone collecting #tw bones #vulture core

[veryfancyrat]

There comes a time in every young rat's life when you feel the uncontrollable urge to yeet yourself straight out of the cage as soon as the door opens, no matter how far off the ground it is, and then go sprinting for freedom and the space under the couch. If you are lucky and have kind, attentive humans, they'll go on a chase to recapture you... and even if you love them back, don't give in right away. Tease them. Poke your nose out from under the couch, dance between their feet, climb their pants before leaping off again!

Keep this up for long enough and they will eventually resort to bribery. Smudge, our hero of the evening, eventually returned home in exchange for a large pile of banana puffs.

She'll probably try again tomorrow, though.

#rat #dumbo rats #pet rats #exotic pets #cute animals #no remorse

[veryfancyrat]

Chorby has recently multiclassed to Cleric, and learned Lay On Hands... she's a very dramatic caster.

#rat #dumbo rats #pet rats #fancy rats #dungeons and dragons #d&d #healing spells

[veryfancyrat]

This is a tufted ground squirrel. IUCN Vulnerable to extinction and endemic to the island of Borneo/Kalimantan.

It has the largest tail to body size ratio of any mammal, with the tail being 130% the size of its body.

I just think everyone should see it

[veryfancyrat]

they’re everywhere! respect them!