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lokibug · 5 years

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Memory Lane

Requested By: @electroma89

Pairing: Loki x Avenger!Reader

Summary: Reader gets shot while on a mission causing them to slip into a small coma and lose their memories. Loki worries as he feels the reader is his only true friend.

Warning(s): Blood(?)

A/N: I’m so sorry for taking so long! But I’ve always been planning on doing something like this as I’ve seen it been done before, but a classic can always be changed for our reading pleasure. Thank you for requesting! They’re open and I love your guys’ feedback!

Loki’s POV

It all occurred so suddenly. Upon their arrival, the Doctor called Strange was running through Stark’s tower like a mad man. Behind him trailed y/n. She was not in the condition in which I remembered. She laid upon a stretcher, blood littered among her torso. Rogers was gripping upon the towel pressed against the wound. It was as if time stood still when I shouted at them from the top of my lungs. Wretched beings, I was presumed to be her accomplice that evening...but as if I were a helpless child, I was scolded not to attend. The avengers’ idea of y/n’s complete and utter diligence consisted of an environment where I was not present.

I consistently threw the fact of my absence being the reason she was in her condition, in all of their faces. She remained in a coma like state for 2 weeks, and every single day as I sat next to her bed side I heard stories of relation from others. By now it was wasted breath, I knew this was my fault. I should’ve went along despite their protests, I’ve never been one to follow the rules...I chose the wrong time to start.

Alongside me, was my brother and y/n’s parents. Unlike most of us in this place, y/n was still granted her parents. They both possessed meta human abilities that resembled their daughters. She chose a different path than them by using her abilities to help those without. I admired this about her greatly. Of course I lived in a tower alongside various people doing the same, including Thor...but y/n was just different. Her simple existence was far more carefully crafted than anyone I’ve ever encountered.

As I sit outside the bed room, her parents speak softly to her. They’ve done this every moment they were able. Knowing of our endearing and complicated friendship, they’ve allowed me to do the same.

“Y-Y/N...oh my god honey, we’re here baby.” Y/N’s mother trembled. I quickly got up from the ground and burst through the door to see y/n staring back at me.

Y/N’s POV

Where am I? I...I think I was shot. The last thing I felt before I blacked out was a burning through my core and...and I think I hit my head on the ground? Wow...I never thought I’d have a headache this painful. Why can’t I open my eyes? They’re just so..heavy. Come on y/n..get up. Then it happened. My eyes slowly fluttered open...where the hell am I?

“Y-Y/N...oh my god honey, we’re here baby.” It was my Mom.

I began blinking a few times when I turned to face Mom and right beside her, Dad. They both clutched my wrist as I attempted to croak out my words.

“W-where?..”

“Oh no Y/N baby, don’t struggle. It’s okay. Don’t rush.” My dad said. My eyes travelled around the room, something I didn’t recognize at all. Suddenly a man of large stature rushed in...another thing I could not recognize.

“Y/N...” The man spoke. How did he know my name? I’ve never met this man in my life. He was dressed in green and black clothing...weird clothing, maybe a costume. Wait—am I in Avengers tower?

Just then a glowing golden circle appeared next to my bedside and out came a man in a red cloak that appeared to be levitating on it’s own.

“Glad to see you’re awake.” He stated.

“When did I fall asleep?...” I asked in a raspy voice.

“Two weeks and a day ago,” He attached different wraps to my body as well as wires, “Your vitals seem to be stable. Okay now, what’s your name?”

“Y/N...Y/L/N. Where am I?”

“Well that answers that question.” He removed the wires once more. My dad held onto my hand and my mother gazed at me, teary eyed.

“Y/N sweetie, can you try to remember this room?” Her voice sounded like glass ready to shatter at any given moment. My body began to tense and suddenly the machine next to me began beeping louder.

Just as it did, Tony Stark ran into the room along with a blonde man...Steve Rogers? I am in Avengers tower. Why the hell am I here?

“Y/N-“ Tony spoke. I recognized him from TV, he was the iron man. I looked up to this man.

“Everyone calm down, her blood pressure is rising too fast. Give her a second.” The odd looking doctor spoke. He then made sure he was in front of my confused eyes fully. I kept making eye contact with the black haired man...he wouldn’t stop staring at me. “Y/N...what is the last thing you remember?”

“I-I...Burning. My stomach burned and I hit my head. Is that why I’m here? Was there another attack? I-I didn’t know Stark Towers takes in patients...” my voice drifted.

Suddenly everyone gave each other weary gazes. They all seemed to be in on a joke that I had no recollection of. How did my parents know Tony Stark? Were they doing hero work behind my back?

“...This may be a lot to take in-“ The Doctor began speaking before the black haired man cut him off.

“—For Gods sake Strange, what is this? Y/N, do you know who I am?”

I felt a wave of pain hit me...it seemed like I should know this man. The way he looked at me made me want to know him so badly.

“I-I don’t...I’m sorry.” But I didn’t know him at all.

The look on his face said it all, he was hurt. He stood up straight and looked towards the Doctor for answers.

“It seems you have gotten a slight case of amnesia—but don’t panic. You’ve just awakened and your recovery time is not estimated at this moment.” Just then I felt my body weaken. How was I a stranger in my own mind? How long was this going to last?

Loki’s POV

Weeks have gone and passed. Y/N’s family decided it was best that she got back into the course of the life she had prior to her injuries. It was as if she were reliving her days as if they were her first in the compound. Just as before, Stark has introduced her to the technology that enticed her mind. Rogers shared stories of his history and helped train her along with Romanoff.

I’ve attempted to keep my distance as Strange said revealing things without her realizing it on her own, could cause possible damage. It would be too hard to hide the fact of...our last conversation before she lost her memories. I had alas asked her to accompany me on a romantic evening as I have strong feelings towards her...she agreed. Though...we agreed to keep it between us, nobody knows of our shared intimacy. Though they know of our bond, it’s been less of a hassle for me here since her accident. I suppose some do have empathetic tendencies. I planned to keep my distance for an extended amount of time, that was till she snapped me out of my concentration.

“Hey...Loki? Sorry to bother, I was just hoping you could maybe help me with something.” She said from behind me.

I felt my soul nearly leap from my body hearing her nervous voice. I looked away from the spell book placed in front of me, my hovering came to an end as I now stood to my feet. I clear my throat and turn to face her.

“And what would that be Y/N?”

She carefully folded her hands in front of her, “Well um...I was wondering if you could help me regain what I’ve lost...” That’s when I felt my stomach drop. Yes, I have the ability to make people remember and relive their memories...even their worst ones. Strange and all the others told me not to meddle due to y/n’s health. I cared enough about her to remain outside of her mind.

“I don’t suggest that your primary doctor recommended me, had they?” I arch my eyebrow looking at her nervous stature. She was always nervous around me in the beginning. Looking as if she were a porcelain doll and I, a large hammer waiting to disrupt.

“No,” she laughed quietly, “Thor actually. He told me that he thinks I’m stable enough to handle what I’ve missed...So can you help me? Please.” Y/N pleaded.

I rub my temple with two of my fingers, “He’s an oaf,” I sigh, “but he only means well...come. Follow me.”

Y/N’s POV

When Loki said he’d helped me, I was over the moon. Everyone has kept it a secret of what his actual capabilities were. I suppose that only added to my curiosity and manifested into the intimidation of who he is. When Thor told me what his brother can do to help me I knew this was why no one would detail his powers when I asked, like I had asked about all the others.

Sitting on the floor of his room, I watched him as he removed his fingerless gloves and cautiously sit on the floor. He looked slightly more nervous than I had and it was odd.

“Now,” he sat crosses legged in front of me, “Recovering from the trance isn’t always great. It can make you not snap back into your reality immediately, you need to understand that what I am going to show you is something you’ve loved already. I promise I will not add anything new...I also apologize in advance if you remember something’s...that I’m not exactly proud of.” Loki replaced his usual taunting face with one of sincerity. I knew he meant what he said. He gave me no other reason not to trust him.

“We all do things...I’m just tired of feeling like a stranger in my own mind. No one understands—It’s horrible.” I looked down at my knees and gulped.

Loki sighed and looked down as well, “I can say honestly that I know exactly what you mean...” I looked up at him quickly but he looked away, “—Okay let’s get started. May I?” He asked lifting his hands up to touch my cheeks.

When he did this, I blushed. I was completely worried he would feel how warm they were. I agreed anyways, “You may.” The touch of his palms on my cheeks felt familiar and even though they were warm, his hands immediately cooled them down.

“Close your eyes.” He said and took a deep breathe. After I did so, I felt a light push on my head and I was no longer in the bedroom.

Where was I? My surroundings were as if I were there reliving every little detail. Fighting off bad guys in the early mornings, meeting Tony, meeting everyone else. I convinced my parents to let me live in the tower. The tower! It was all I wanted, I remember this. They’re my friends, we’re all close. Loki, he’s Thor’s brother. Adopted...everyone reminded. He...he was even more handsome then I remembered. He enjoys my company too, we actually are a great team out on the field. No wonder he missed me while I was knocked out. Wait...h-he kissed me. He likes me the same way...we’re going on a date soon! That mission, it’s not going well. What the hell?...Oh my God I got shot...there’s blood. Too much blood. It hurts so bad...I can’t die. Don’t let me die, please...

Loki’s POV

I release my hands from her face and she starts gasping loudly and immediately moves her hand to her old wound.

“Y/N, Y/N. It’s the illusion. Come back now. You’re okay.” I hold her arms in a solid grip and she looks at me. She furrows her eyes brows looking scared but...she looked different.

“I-I’m not bleeding...” she looks at her side.

“No love,” I say with a slight hint of sorrow remembering how I imagined life without her, “You’re in my room...you’re safe.”

She simply looked into my eyes and caught her breathe, she reached her trembling hand to my cheek. Her fingers felt the same and she quickly pulled me into a tight embrace. “I’m sorry,” she buried her face into my shoulder, “I didn’t mean to forget you...”

I held onto her tightly and chuckled lightly, “That’s quite alright,” my smile was blatantly obvious, “we needed a stroll down memory lane is all.” I spoke softly, happy that I had my best friend back.

Loki taglist: @drakesfiance @sunflqweroses @bambamwolf87 @pandaqua @bonelessbarnes @dorkybryan @hunter-demigod-timelord @thatmemequeen @powerstrangerdacre @barnes-infinity-bucky @kcd15 @evanicoya @yuukiiiiasuna @lou-makes-me-strong @gabealien12 @vethrvolnir2 @noahlizzz @archy3001 @mysticlarizza @lokislilslut

Permanent Taglist: @libbymouse @keithseabrook27 @maladaptive-ninja-returns @nephalem67 @tina8009 @marvelismylifffe @gwendolyn-loves-gay

#loki #loki odinson #tom hiddleston #loki x reader #loki x oc #loki x y/n #steve rogers #loki x you #bucky x reader #loki fic #loki fanfiction #loki imagine #tomhiddleston x reader

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lokibug · 5 years

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✨Lokibug Update✨

Hey guys, everyone who reads and enjoys my stories. I haven’t posted in a long time and I could honestly say it’s because of my own personal issues and lack of motivation. I don’t have a laptop and have written every single story here on mobile. I get writer’s block and struggle a bit with my confidence in writing. But I love this blog and writing more than anything, I’ve started working on something and I can’t wait to share it with you all :)

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lokibug · 5 years

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✨New Header✨

I JUST MADE A THING AND IM PROUD

Bonus ✨ (A new Avatar)

#loki #lokibug #admin speaks #rita speaks

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lokibug · 5 years

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I haven’t been active but, HAPPY 500!! ✨✨✨

Also I LOVE September :,)

HAPPY 500 KAILI!!!! SO SO SO SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!! 😁💕🤪 Cast mutuals as the months of the year?

THANK YOU SM ANNA 💕💕

January: @stuckonspidey

February: @technicolor-lightning (my valentine 💖)

March: @summernykole

April: @parkerstylesperalta

May: @keytothegauntlet

June: @starsholland

July: @softspideyboy

August: @gabriel-morrison-reyes

September: @lokibug

October: @h-osterfield

November: @calum-hoodwinked-me

December: @starksparker

Sleepover Weekend!!

#I love fall in general #rita speaks #admin speaks

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lokibug · 5 years

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Always

Pairing: Loki x Fem!Reader

Summary: Loki searches for his reincarnated lover, for years and finally finds you.

Warning(s): Death

A/N: This idea hit me at 2 AM and It’s taken awhile to tailor it just to my liking but I’ve attempted. Enjoy!

Story Song: Bruises by Lewis Capaldi

Loki’s POV

In my one thousand plus years of existence I’ve encountered what true love is once...two times. Now this may appear to puzzle most beings but, I’ve come across a wandering spirit. A spirit that has taken various forms, a spirit that has taken my heart hostage various lifetimes.

In her first form she was granted the name, Asta. Divine beauty in birth long lasting till she departed. A creature gifted with such an alluring aura, she came to me in my younger years. Mother always did her best in describing what love can and could become if given the opportunity. After all, one of the two between Thor and I would be bestowed the thrown of Asgard. With a great king was an even greater queen.

Given these years were tough amongst the both of us, training was a tribulation that was never ending. I often found myself hiding towards the shore of our Asgardian waters while in distress over my continuous battle for sun against my elder brother. That’s when I found her...rather, she found me. Asta had dodged the rock I had skipped in her direction without notice. Never had I seen anyone in my time being there. Yet, there she was soaking her feet in the shallow water. Her hair flowed and she shouted at me for being disgraceful. It amazed me how anyone could look incredible while still being irked with me. At the time being seen as royalty I hadn’t engaged in a level headed conversation with anyone outside of my relative circle. Embarrassing as it is, I must admit I had been choked up. My words struggled as they scrambled out of my parted lips and found their way to her perfectly perched ears.

Forgiving me for my inconvenience, she had become something I’ve never truly had...a friend. Thor had various warrior friends that trained alongside us, sure they put on the show in front of him...but in actuality they were never my friends. Asta was mine and mine alone.

She became my constant. My morning, afternoon, and evening. When I woke, I hurried for training so I could be released earlier, during training I day dreamed ways I could impress her with my growing combat skill. While with her, her attention could never wander from the two of us and her laughter was a symphony unheard to any living creature. At night when I was forced to depart...I dreamed of her.

Needless to say, I was falling in love. With my lack of it, attaching to her was easier than I had thought.

I hid my relationship with her from everyone in fear of being scolded by my father for loving the wrong woman.

I should’ve known better than to lie about my whereabouts because my mother had known the entire time. Thor only found out after he attempted to follow me while on my way to meeting her. He had never been the best at hiding, given his heavy footed stances.

Apparently after I confessed to him, being excited that his little brother had found a woman to love, he suggested to our father that she be granted to a dinner with us.

Just as I feared, I was to remain in my chambers away from Asta.

An attack within our own citizens of Asgard resulted in the death of many...including my beloved.

Not much can explain my down fall, besides excessively finding ways to bring her back.

With guilt heaving him, Thor found it best to promise to help find a resolution. In that resolution, we traveled to a small planet in search of a woman of magic. My long time investigation finally payed off when I came face to face with Asta’s grandmother. A woman of magic, she explained to me of her granddaughter’s spirit. Hence the term wandering spirit. Non resting, Asta was out there...all I had to do was find her. I needed to find her.

The wait was gut wrenching, my mind never wandered from where she could be. I resented my father for his part in ceasing my chances in rescuing her from her departure. The confused parts of me that were not resenting him, were constantly attempting to prove I was worthy of becoming a divine ruler even without a properly functioning heart.

That’s exactly what I had done. For the next 100 years, I focused on my journey to the thrown. Magic and combat was what I dreamt of, replacing Asta’s laughing face in my slumber. I had begun to believe that she was never returning. The memory of my once beloved was dwindling and I found myself almost finding peace once more.

Of course this was until the renewal of Asgard’s army. In the ceremony, I met a woman by the name of Sage. She had been staring at me all night, until I had finally confronted her. Yes, I must admit I was in the slightest offended. As if not ashamed at all, she told me that she found me attractive.

I did what any god of my status would of course...I blushed. After meeting her on the combat field, she had much to say. She was full of wit and jokes, intriguing me in the way the other warriors fought to silence her. They hadn’t succeeded because even in failure, Sage never backed down her moral status. In the beginning, I began to push her in the opposite direction. I had feared being betrayed by allowing someone near. Regardless of my attempts, she remained.

When I realized how much she reminded me of Asta...I wondered if possibly she was Asta. Gathering up my research from Asta’s grandmother, I read through various journals that would help me in my journey of finding Asta. In many ancient stories of these wandering spirits, they carried small physical traits along with them. In Asta’s case, a birthmark was to be found upon her midsection.

Upon further investigation, I had indeed found that Sage carried the birthmark of Asta. Consequent to my discovery, I wanted nothing more than to scoop Asta into my arms and never release her again. Relocation hit that, this might’ve been Asta, but Sage had built a life for herself...her own woman. The idea of her not accepting me as hers was one I was not ready to encounter.

Yet eventually, she had. Sage had become someone very dear to me, just as Asta had. I remember telling her that we’ve met before in a past life. A wave of relief went over me when she responded positively. Sage learned from a witch that her spirit had wandered and was one of elder age. She often had dreams of Asta’s childhood, embracing them as her own. Being drawn to me must’ve been a little trick she played amongst herself.

This angelic woman possessed my heart once more when I began to believe there was nothing left. Then again, she really never rid of it to begin with. We were unstoppable in battle. Even more unstoppable in our own world. Thor knew of Sage’s alliance with me and that she had been Asta previously. Learning from his past mistakes, he kept it secret.

I must admit, it was all is mischievous fun when I would sneak her into my chambers. There we spent our nights speaking of the future. A future of ruling...a future of family...a future that existed. I was determined to never let her slip through my fingers once more.

It was my mistake by making my intentions blatantly clear to her. Being the stubborn woman she was, she insisted that no harm would come to her...again. I battled in words various times against her, but she...she had a way to still my demons with her delicate touch.

Then, events began to turn darker than expected. The King of Jotunheim allowed his people to attempt to steal back a relic of sorts from Asgard. This wasn’t taken well by my brother nor my father. Odin specifically told Thor not to proceed with his attempt at war with these Jotuns. Not following through with being told what to do, he organized a plan anyways in which I was guided into as well. Sage, along with other warriors were also to attend. Despite my pleading in private for her not to follow, she did so anyways.

Along with Fandral, Sage was also struck by various sharp edged pieces of ice. Thus...ending her life as I held her in my arms once we returned back to Asgard.

I had been too distracted to save her, upon discovering my true identity as a Jotun. It didn’t help ease the pain I felt losing her...knowing I was one of the monsters that did so.

Years and years of plotting and destruction enveloped my entire being. I no longer felt for anyone in such a way, nor had I yearned to. I swore it off entirely. After all, my life wasn’t seen as settling down in any near or far future...

Or so I had thought.

The honking horns drained my ear drums as I made my way down the pavement. Brushing various shoulders, I made an effort to push through and keep my eyes out.

It has been about a year without any chaos. I’ve had time to practice my healing and adapt to the ways of my peers. Who would’ve believed my peers would be of that on Midgard. I embarked on finding her again...much to my luck, she wasn’t far at all. In the same realm to be exact.

I watched as she made her way through the crowded shop and ordered a coffee. She set down her bag and sat at a wooden table. Calmly and collected, I ordered myself a coffee. After collecting it, I gently walked to her table and tapped the chair across from her.

“Mind if I gather a seat by the window?”

“Not at all,” she smiled, “Let me get that.” She gathered her bag and set it by her leg.

“Thank you,” I sit down and scoot in, “Loki.” I outstretched my hand.

“Y/N,” she shook my hand and instantly I felt a tingly feeling, “Nice to meet you.”

“The pleasure is all mine.”

Permanent Taglist: @libbymouse @keithseabrook27 @maladaptive-ninja-returns @nephalem67 @tina8009 @marvelismylifffe @gwendolyn-loves-gay

#loki #loki odinson #tom hiddleston #loki x reader #loki x oc #loki x y/n #loki x you #avengers infinity war #loki oneshot #loki fanfiction #loki fanfic

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lokibug · 5 years

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I was tagged by @wazzupmrstark in the last line challenge! Thank you very much :,) I wasn’t ignoring I just literallly had no WIP. As of now I do! So here’s the last line in my wip of a Loki doc called: Always

“...all I had to do was find her. I needed to find her.”

Feel free to ignore or not, but I’m tagging: @maladaptive-ninja @lokis-amazing-fighting-skills

#admin speaks #rita speaks

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lokibug · 5 years

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Hi! So I created a Loki themed blog. I was wondering if I could ask you to give me a shout out. I’m just starting it, so it’s a bit rusty. The new blog is called: Loki’s-Amazing-Fighting-Skills. I’m sorry to bother you but I just love your blog, and you have inspired me! Thank you so much for reading this, I hope you have a splendid day. :)

Of flipping Course I will! Thank you for supporting me and my dream basically. I’m honored to even have given you inspiration for this ahah. Everyone who’s ever had an account for anything they love knows how we don’t start off with a thousand followers. It starts with one and progresses. So if you love Loki then go and check out @lokis-amazing-fighting-skills

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lokibug · 5 years

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Barely reblogging this but I got shipped with Nakia, the babe 👀

Hello there :) Congratulations on 3.5k! Can’t wait to see your account develop to gain even more followers! I would like to ask for a romantic ship, if possible. I’m 5’7” Mexican American, Female. I am bisexual. I have hazel (brownish and green) eyes with long eyelashes (some people think they’re fake haha). I wear glasses. I have long black hair (super dark brown). I enjoy reading deep stories and poems. I write and draw constantly. I’ve been described as strong mentally, and a great listener

Thank you so much hun! That is so sweet of you! I ship you with Nakia!

Like you, Nakia enjoys reading literature with a deeper meaning. She finds it helps to reinforce her beliefs in humanity and the universe. The two of you sit together and discuss “heavy” issues a lot. You reassure her that the goals she is working towards, and the means she uses, are helping to create a better world. Whenever she has a difficult day, she knows that you will be there ready to help carry her burdens.

She is very supportive of your art and proud of everything that you create. It amazes her how your creations are able to sway the hearts of anyone who looks at them and the power of the messages you are able to portray without words. It astounds Nakia and she is genuinely proud of you, changing the views of the world one person at a time.

You are both genuine people who care for the ones around you, deeply and almost too strongly. It isn’t easy to carry that much love and kindness in your hearts but you help to keep each other strong and are so much better for being together than apart.

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lokibug · 5 years

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Darkness

Pairing: Loki x Avenger!Reader

Summary: You have an power that is set off far more rapidly due to mood, you often reduce your feelings. Loki understands and helps you embrace your negative emotions.

Warning(s): Mental Health issues, Cursing, Angst

A/N: This isn’t the best organized story but sometimes we need to cry and this is a story about that. Ive also got a quote from somewhere that inspired me to write this. I’m not positive where from, though.

The ceiling. The ceiling is the first thing y/n spent staring at every morning for an hour. The composure was something she needed, to endure the rest of the day. Recently being able to do so had become more and more of challenge.

Just like any other day, she refreshened herself in the tower’s bathroom. However, she was in luck since she had the level all to herself. Typically Wanda would be in her chambers but she was on leave alongside Vision. They had taken up a small mission in Japan.

Today would be normal, quiet. Everyone would be to themselves and the day would be over just as quickly as it had started. Perhaps she would just take a walk around the park, see a movie alone. Avoid the others as much as she could without giving off the wrong impression.

Running a hand through her hair, she walked into the dining room. Suddenly all the voices that were speaking in hushed tones, silenced.

“Happy Birthday, y/n!” the team mates spoke in unison.

Y/N’s breath hitched in her throat as she glanced at the tower of iced and sprinkled waffles placed upon a silicone plate. Her eyes darted from the waffles to the nearby window and panic slightly spread through her body. Seeing the clouds pick up pace she took a deep breath and masked a smile. She couldn’t let her emotions get the best of her, her powers came with a horrid side effect. Weather change.

“Thank you guys,” she rubbed the back of her neck, “how’d you know?”

Folding the newspaper he was reading, Tony peeked behind his reading glasses, “Your file. Pepper did the honors of filing your birthday into the system last year when you joined the team.” He stood up and glanced at the waffles. “The tower of diabetes was the kid’s idea.”

Peter came into the dining room sliding with his socks upon his feet. “Aw! Did you guys surprise her without me?”

“If you had gotten up on time then you would’ve been here, kid.” Tony spoke after sipping on whatever was in his mug.

“Thank you Peter.” Y/N said after containing herself. She allowed a small smile as he embraced her gently. Along came birthday wishes from the rest of the team before they exited for their daily duties.

The one person y/n’s eyes searched for, was Loki. She met them when he was gently leaning against the marble counter. His eyes fixated on her as if he had been studying her since entered the dining room. Noticing her notice him, Loki lifted up the glass mug in her direction slightly without any words spoken. She delicately nodded as if to say, “Thank you for not making a huge deal of this nightmare of a day.”

Snapping her out of her thoughts, Thor placed a hand on her shoulder, “Congratulations on your day of birth lady y/n. Jane sends her best wishes.” A Congratulations wasn’t the term that should be used for such a day in her mind. It was...a mistake. Instead of indulging her new friend in her sorrows, she smirked and nodded.

“Thanks Thor, tell Jane thanks too.” He smirked and sat back down at the table.

Loki unfolded his arms from his chest and began walking forward. He met eyes with y/n and stared at her till he walked past her with the mug.

Loki and y/n shared an unspoken bond. They were both...different. They weren’t naturally gifted with being as honorable as their team mates. Both were once considered a villain of the public.

Y/N had been misguided while aging, raised by those with malicious intentions. This was only the path down the wrong road, that was until the avengers met her. Last minute, using her abilities for the greater good.

Now that she had a new found family, disappointing them was a crippling thought. Lately, the pressure was on. Any normal person suffering from these anxiety attacks could embrace them...feel them. Y/N on the other hand, anxiety was the first step in obliterating the streets with hectic winds and disaster.

In her eyes, being alone was a simpler task than interacting. Y/N glanced at the stack of waffles and sighed. There was a delicately iced spider right on top along with a little sun resembling her own power. She cradled the overly heavy plate and walked back towards her room and allowed the door to shut lightly behind her.

Loki glanced out the window of his bed room clenching the coffee mug in his pale hands. The skies were gray, typical for New York on a normal. However, the newscast had predicted otherwise as they were expecting sunny skies. Being the mischievous person he was, he snooped through y/n’s file upon her arrival. She was like him, a villain, in his right mind, he wouldn’t trust someone like this. Upon reading through her records, he discovered a few things about her. Ever since, analyzed and watched her in silence.

“Birthday blues?...” he mumbled while taking another sip.

Y/N glanced in the mirror as she popped two anti-depressant pills into her mouth. She barely recognized herself, if she thought she was furious with herself before...she was beyond a breaking point now.

“Y/F/N (friend’s name) you would’ve really enjoyed it here,” she sat upon her bed clutching the torn up teddy bear, “the coffee doesn’t taste like the shit we found outside Mc Donald’s.” Y/N’s transforming mission was also the one that cost her, her best friend. Survivors guilt was all that could describe her feelings. That, blaming herself for being brought into this world, not saving her...became a reaction to the mental battle she faced daily.

Memories roamed her mind and she gently closed her eyes in hopes of stopping them from racing. Sleep arrived, saving her from herself once more.

Hours later, Y/N stood in front of that haunting mirror image. Only this time it was decorated with an expensive dress and a mask of makeup. Instead of her bed room, it was the bathroom of the expensive venue Tony rented out for the evening. He had planned a birthday celebration with Pepper for y/n a month ago. Among the guests were her team mates, members of other teams, fellow company employees, along with their plus ones. Y/N had made her way to the bathroom for a simple breather. Mingling with people she hadn’t met before and being handed drinks she didn’t want to drink with food she didn’t want to eat, drained her.

As she exited the bathroom, she stood in the hallway staring at her phone. Her heels pressed into the fancy carpet as she bit her knuckle. An immense feeling of escape was bubbling and it was dancing with the fear of disappointing her friends.

“Alone when there’s such a...lovely? Party going on in your honor?” A voice spoke snapping her out of her trance.

Her face rose to meet the eyes of none other than Loki. She had to admit he did look amazing in a suit. “I um,” she smiled widely, “just about to head back.” Her face was pure lies and Loki knew it. It almost pained him to see it unfold before his own eyes when he knew the truth.

“Of course, after 30 minutes of standing in the lady’s room admiring yourself I’m guessing,” he sarcastically commented, “unlike the baboons I share a roof with, I notice my surroundings...all of the time.” He stepped closer to her. His eyes scanned her whole domineer, it baffled him how no other member took notice in her obvious suffering.

“What now? You going to go run and tell Tony how I hate this expensive and beautiful party he’s given me? Because if you are, it’s only going to cause more problems that I don’t need.” She slid her phone back into her purse.

Loki let out a soft chuckle, “The opposite actually. Come hither, we’re leaving.” He turned his back and began walking towards the exit in the hallway.

Y/N furrowed her eyebrows in confusion as to just what he meant. He glided with confidence that she’d follow, and she did. The shuffling of her dress made it known that she had. Soon they were outside and Loki had shifted from himself to Tony.

“W-what do you think you’re doing? What’s going on?” She said in a worried voice as she glanced around.

“Be quiet love, I’m taking you somewhere and I can’t let you ride on my back. Well...I can but that’s hardly appropriate.” He smirked and turned towards her.

Y/N groaned and rolled her eyes but remained silent. They approached the valet parking attendants and Loki cleared his voice, managing his best Tony impression. “Yes, can you fetch my car.”

The young man looked up quickly and said, “Oh Mr. Stark—why are you leaving so early?”

He looked towards y/n, “My dear friend here is a bit under the weather. I’m going to take her home. So please, my car.”

“Why yes of course sir, right away. Bring up Mr. Stark’s car.” He commanded another attendee.

Loki turned towards y/n and smirked. She crossed her arms and huffed beneath her breath, “You’re unbelievable. He’s going to find out and when he does, you’re not taking me down with you.”

Soon a shiny black Lamborghini was pulled in front of the two and y/n’s jaw nearly dropped. She was still not used to Tony’s luxurious living and this was astonishing.

Loki went to the car and opened her door for her as she entered. He got in through the other side.

“Thanks!” He shouted before driving off quickly.

Y/N gasped, “I don’t even have a seatbelt on, wait.”

Loki’s green magic shimmered over him as he transformed back into himself, “For someone who can take the power of a lightning bolt through her body, you’re quite jittery.”

Going full speed, he made his way through back streets all the way to a back highway.

“Shut up. Where are we going? This is technically grand theft auto.” She gripped her knee as she seen the moon slightly disappear behind dark clouds. Noticing this, Loki smirked to himself.

“Well would you rather me leave you at the party with people that don’t even know your name?” He shot back.

“Yeah because you know me so well.” She sarcastically spoke.

Loki gripped the wheel as he made his way around the road. Y/N couldn’t admit it, but it was a thrill. Being used to not feeling anything, this was a nice change. Though, her eyes were still fixated on the sky.

“I know you far better than you think.”

Her eyes glanced at the man driving and he peeked back at her through the corner of his eye. He pushed forward.

Twenty minutes passed when he pulled over to the side of the road. A landscape, a clear landscape of nothing but dirt and rocks. “Out.” He commanded.

She blinked a few times as she glanced around, “Where the hell are we? Loki, why did you bring me here?” She was becoming agitated as she seen him smirk.

The clouds began letting down small sprinkles of water. He walked towards the middle of the landscape and shouted over to her, “You’re living a lie.”

She remained quiet as she walked towards him, a small panic scorching her body as she felt the small droplets of water.

“I...I have to.” She was tired of lying. Loki standing here in front of her, confronting her...she didn’t feel the need to lie. She felt as if she were five inches tall.

“For what? For them? The public?” He spat out. In a way he was almost scolding himself.

“Why does it matter to you anyways?” She angrily spoke back as the rain moved faster.

“Y/N I watch you, every single day. You pretend to be someone you are not. Righteous. Pretending like you’re not angry at the universe for taking what’s yours.”

Her heart thumped as she grit her teeth together, “I asked why do you fucking care!”

He gripped her shoulders, “Because! You’re like me! You’re dying inside and it’s painful to watch! I’m here to teach you how to rid yourself of the burden you’ve carried so long, y/n.”

She looked up at him as her chest heaved and the rain began soaking their hair. “You won’t feel the same about me if I do..” she mumbled looking down. The attraction towards Loki wasn’t something she denied but how could she allow herself into someone’s life if she could barely endure her own?

Loki circled her and stood behind her, “Light is easy to love...show me your darkness.”

The rain dripped down her cheeks as if she were showering. Her fists clenched until her knuckles turned white. “I can’t...” She croaked out as tears fell.

“Yes you can y/n. Never deny your feelings...”

“I’ll hurt people, I-I don’t wanna do that anymore.” She turned to face him.

“There’s no one for miles, love. Let me show you.” He took her hand and faced the other side of the road. He took a deep breath before screaming as loud as he could into the raining night sky. Y/N watched him and her hand shook along with the rest of her body. He took a deep breathe, “You try.”

Y/N looked at him for reassurance and he nodded, “Ahhh!” She screamed out and thunder rumbled.

“Yes, keep going y/n. Do it again. Shout it, what troubles you.” He released her hand and stepped back.

She nodded and looked down, “I hate you! I hate being you! You let her die!” She sobbed as the rain hit down harder than before. Lightning sparked in the clouds. “You’ll never be what they want you to be! I’ll never be that! I’m here! I exist!” She screamed out while her arms extended. Loki watched cautiously as her body shook and he held an arm over his head to stop the rain from hitting his eyes.

“I-I’m here! I made it!” Right as she shouted a bolt of lightning struck down in front of her causing her to fall to the ground and dig her hands into the muddy floor. Her shoulders shook and immediately Loki went over to her and collected her into his embrace.

“I exist..” she mumbled into his shoulder as she cried.

“I know y/n...and you’ll keep living...” he rubbed the back of her soaked head.

She gripped onto his suit tightly embracing him. The negative feelings being released and a weight off her shoulders, “Thank you...thank you so much.” She said into his neck. “You have no idea...h-how long I’ve been waiting..”

“...Happy Birthday y/n...”

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