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eagles-translated · 3 years

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Analyzing the writing of Eagles

Here's a post I've been wanting to make for a while! I've expressed my thoughts on some of the storylines in previous posts, but I've never done a complete post on the writing of the whole show. I've divided this post into separate parts, focusing on each season and its plot points. Keep reading to see my analysis of the writing in Eagles! 👇 Word Count: 18k

If you've stumbled upon this post from the Young Royals or the Beartown tag (tagged them since I've drawn some parallels from those shows), here's a brief summary of what Eagles is, which you can watch with English subtitles here. This post contains Eagles spoilers from 1x01 - 3x10.

Eagles is a Swedish TV show that revolves around a few teenagers living in the Swedish ice hockey town Oskarshamn while experiencing friendship, love, and rivalry on the ice.

To start this off I would like to say that I have no experience with professional screenwriting and if anything, this is just a way for me to procrastinate on actually writing my own projects.

I love experiencing new stories and when I discover one I really like it's just natural for me to branch off with "what ifs" and to start wondering how the story would've turned out if some things were changed. Sometimes it's with a storyline improvement in mind, and other times it's just out of plain curiosity.

You might feel like this post is leaning towards the critical side, and I can definitely understand why since there are a lot of small details that I've picked apart from all seasons. I added a section for each season with things that I thought were really well done so this post wouldn't be too negative.

I actually did enjoy all seasons and I feel like the quality of not just the writing but every single thing has steadily increased each year.

Season 1: Tropes and clichés

Eagles premiered its first season in 2019 and was, despite many negative reviews, a big success among its target audience. Every episode on SVT Play amassed around 700 000–800 000 views and there didn't seem to be any doubt that the show would get renewed.

What the critics had issues with were that "Eagles rarely takes the unexpected path, and feels like a slightly soulless product of studied target group thinking a little too often," (Karolina Fjellborg in Aftonbladet) and "In Eagles, the characters seem to be locked in the role of a "teenager" but the humanity is missing. They've simplified the construction of the character," (Django Lorentzson in MovieZine).

Eagles was unfortunate enough to constantly be compared to SKAM in its infancy, and that's a tough comparison to live up to. SVT sort of shot themselves in the foot as they were the ones who contributed to it. While the show was still in the casting process, SVT wrote an article hyping the show up as a Swedish SKAM (which has since been edited, but led many to falsely believe that it would involve all the familiar SKAM characters with some hockey elements sprinkled in).

So, why exactly did critics think the first three episodes of the show were predictable and soulless? Well, it's pretty simple. They'd seen it all before. The setting, the characters, the storylines—just in different TV shows and movies.

Season 1 for me is nostalgic and very enjoyable despite its clichéd nature. I also felt like I'd seen the show before due to its generic storylines, but there is a reason why tropes are tropes and why clichés are clichés. It's because they're tried and true, and actually somewhat good writing tools as long as you expand on them. The keyword here is to expand—a story doesn't magically become good simply because you mimic something another writer has done. Tropes are fine to use but you can't just apply them and stop there. Everything in a story needs to be developed in order to be good.

It's safe to say that it's pretty much impossible to write a story without any tropes that have been used before. Striving to avoid clichés at all costs in hopes of making your story as original as possible is harder than it sounds, and almost impossible to boot. Here's a great piece of advice for aspiring writers written by a user on Carvezine:

[...] if you look down at your story and are worried it’s already been told before – don’t spend another second thinking about it. It has. A million times. The only difference is that it hasn’t been told by you. Accept that regurgitation is part of writing, and just do your best not to regurgitate the same way as the guy next to you. We’d all do well to acknowledge there is at least a portion of our stories that are really someone else’s. [...] Beyond that, write with the motivation that if you don’t get around to telling your story, eventually somebody else will.

Even the greatest books have storylines with some clichés. And that's not really a bad thing, either. Think about it. How many times have you decided to binge a TV show solely because it reminded you of another series? Or picked up a book simply because you love a good enemies to lovers romance, a battle between good and evil fantasy, or whatever it might be?

I found this article from Masterclass that perfectly describes what tropes are and why they're used. It's written from the perspective of novel writing but it is still applicable.

A trope in literary terms is a plot device or character attribute that is used so commonly in the genre that it’s seen as commonplace or conventional. For example, a trope in superhero stories is a villain who wants to take over the world. Tropes are popular for a reason—if something has been written about over and over again, there’s a good chance that it’s something readers enjoy reading! Tropes can be helpful, but a novel made up only of tropes will quickly start to feel stale and predictable to readers. That’s why you need to read up on tropes—and then innovate. Deliberately taking a favorite trope and turning it on its head is a great way to put your own unique spin on the genre and keep your readers interested.

Eagles, in its first season, didn't really do a lot of expanding upon the tropes they used and it's understandable that they were still trying to find their footing. I can also imagine it's difficult to do so when you only have eight 20 minute episodes in the season.

However... There definitely should've been more work put into these characters to make them their own. It's tricky, yes, but still achievable if you don't abandon them in their cookie-cutter form and try to actually decorate them with something unique and fresh.

So, how did they write their characters?

Felicia's character and backstory

To start off, Felicia is a famous influencer known for starring in a reality show next to her former NHL professional father. There's already a clear disconnect because it's hard to relate to a character with such a public past and large following. But it is 100% possible if you let the viewer know the character has humane qualities just like the person watching the show.

Look at Wilhelm from Netflix's Young Royals, another Swedish TV show. Wilhelm is the prince of Sweden, set to attend a prestigious elite boarding school, and is the heir to the throne. That doesn't exactly sound like a relatable scenario, does it? And yet the writers make it work because when we're introduced to Wilhelm we realize he's just like everybody else. He wants a normal life, he latches on to his older brother for support, he has anxiety, and he struggles between following his heart versus doing what his family is expecting him to do. A lot of these factors are relatable among the audience.

So, let's look at Felicia Kroon. She is in many ways portrayed as the main character of the show. Eagles starts off with her family having moved to Oskarshamn and the following episodes focus on her developing relationship with Ludde as well as her traumatic past. There's almost too much focus on Felicia here, and I'll get back to that.

Comparing Felicia to Wilhelm from Young Royals, they're both well-known teenagers with famous parents. Of course they have different circumstances considering Felicia is Instagram popular and Wilhelm is a blood royal, but in the grand scheme of things they're similar. Felicia is even referred to as a "Kroon princess" because of her last name Kroon bearing a resemblance to the Swedish word kronprinsessa, meaning crown princess.

The students of their respective schools treat their attendance as a big deal when they first arrive and then Wilhelm and Felicia start spending time with the "popular" crowd despite not really fitting in there.

I personally found it easy to relate to Wilhelm but difficult to relate to Felicia. Some people may feel differently, but her character is basically a popular party girl who attracts the attention of one of the school's star players and is "welcomed" by the popular crowd on her first day of school. I put welcome in quotation marks because Klara, the leader of the girl group, isn't exactly the most welcoming person but she does welcome Felicia to the school. My point is, Felicia doesn't have a lot of relatable traits in the first episodes.

Felicia then goes on a date with the guy she's met, Ludde. Okay, so there haven't been that many layers to her character yet. We're at the third episode and so far she's been kind of flat.

Near the end of the third episode, we get some depth to the character and we hear her back story.

Felicia: [...] We don’t have a good relationship, my dad and I. And that’s probably why we moved from the beginning, because he’s an idiot. We’ve never been close, but… Elias and he have been since they’ve had hockey. [...] And mom has been really involved, so… And I… They’ve never really cared about me. And… And I haven’t really been a problem either. I’ve had good grades, good friends, and… I don’t know why I’m telling you this. I don’t talk about it to people. [...] I just felt so fucking lonely and invisible. I was worried all the time, couldn’t sleep, panicked because I couldn’t sleep… So I started going out more. It went overboard. It started affecting school, my grades slipped… I started taking things to be able to concentrate. Everybody does stuff like that. And then I still couldn’t sleep, so… I started mixing with sleeping pills. And there’s always wine and booze at our place. I don’t want this to come out, that’s really important. Ludde: Of course, I’d never tell. Felicia: One night, something happened that made me… Act out of control more than usual. I woke up the next morning in the hospital. So they sent me to rehab. It was really rough for mom and dad that I was suddenly in focus. When I woke up, dad wasn’t even there. Ludde: What made you take too much that night? Felicia: I’d forgotten my phone at home, so I ran up and got it while my friends were waiting in an Uber. Then I came into the hall and I heard noises. You know, like, when somebody is doing it. Ludde: Okay. Felicia: And I thought it was really weird because mom wasn’t home. So I went into the living room… Dad was fucking my mom’s best friend. On the rug below the couch.

This gives Felicia more layers and does separate her from every other "popular pretty party girl" trope that you see on TV. But this is a huge info dump, and that's a problem. I would've liked to see this happen on-screen instead of only being told what went down. The golden rule of Show don't tell, as people like to say.

Show, don’t tell is a writing technique in which story and characters are related through sensory details and actions rather than exposition. It fosters a style of writing that’s more immersive for the reader, allowing them to “be in the room” with the characters. In his most commonly repeated quote, Chekhov said, “Don’t tell me the moon is shining. Show me the glint of light on broken glass."

This back story could've been more impactful that way if, perhaps, the show began with Felicia in a hospital bed with a strong headache and hazy flashbacks of that night where she saw her dad sleeping with another woman. Then we're introduced to her mother and brother sitting next to the hospital bed tired and worried, and Felicia notices her dad isn't present. They tell her Felicia is being sent to rehab and then there's a time-jump before we see the Kroon family having moved to Oskarshamn.

That's just an idea I threw together at the top of my head, but you get my point. It would've been more interesting if we knew from the beginning that Felicia had a traumatic past like this, leading the viewer to want to know more about what actually happened.

We did get a brief flashback at the very beginning of the show—we see Felicia partying with her friends and taking some pill before lying unconscious on the ground. There's also a glimpse of Ludde's car accident with Andreas yelling at him to get out of there.

That segment only lasts for around 45 seconds and it's easily forgettable upon your first viewing of the show. It's also hard to even recognize Felicia in the dark nightclub setting with the flashing lights. Some dialogue in that short scene could've made it more memorable, because I found that when I first watched season 1 I remembered Andreas yelling at Ludde despite that being drowned out by the music.

Ludde's backstory was way more well-done, in my opinion. We see him having crashed the car and bleeding from his head. He looks terrified and almost frozen by fear, needing to be pulled out of the car by a panicked Andreas yelling at him to bring Ludde back to the reality of the situation. We see Andreas yelling and pointing, telling Ludde he needs to run now. It's more powerful when we get to see it.

And in episode 8, when we learn the truth of what happened, it's not a long and dragged-out monologue. It fits into what's going on in the story. Felicia and Ludde have known each other for a few months now and are much closer than they were on their first date. They've had disagreements and fights, but at this moment they're in a good place.

And it feels like the right moment for Ludde to come clean about what happened to him.

Ludde: Hey… There’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you. Felicia: What? Ludde: About… My brother. It’s not really as everybody thinks. Felicia: What do you mean? Ludde: That night when he crashed… It wasn’t Andreas who drove the car. We were on our way home from one of his buddies. We’d had some fun drinking. And then… I’d just started learning how to drive. So I nagged and nagged at him. Felicia: So you were the one driving? But he’s an adult- Ludde: He was drunk as hell. He was going to leave the car, but I thought it was so cold and it was only three blocks away so I thought that I could drive. Felicia: And what happened? Ludde: It was slippery and really dark… And a car came. I hit the brakes in time, but it… Yeah. Right after he pushed me out of the car and yelled that I should run home straight away. He really didn’t want me to get into trouble. So, yeah… It was fucking bad luck. I want to just gather everybody and scream that it was me. Felicia: Hey… I love you. Ludde: I love you too. I love you so fucking much.

As Ludde is telling Felicia what happened as the other car came, we see a silent flashback of it along with Ludde's voice narrating. We see Andreas pulling him out of the car and yelling. Cutting to this scene that we've already seen in the beginning but might've forgotten about is a smart choice and makes the story Ludde is telling more real. We see it unfolding as Ludde is telling this to Felicia. It's a powerful scene.

We then see Felicia hugging Ludde from behind, a sign of support with no words needed. She tells him she loves him and Ludde says it back. It's an honest and sweet moment that comes at a perfect time in the story. It's not too early like Felicia's backstory was.

I sort of understand why Felicia's backstory was info-dumped because it was right before the drama of Mats accidentally spilling the beans to Klara's family. They wanted the audience to know what happened to her early, so they could move on to the plot point of Felicia thinking Ludde was the one who told everybody.

But we don't need every single detail of Felicia's story. Let it come organically. The only thing that was really needed was for Ludde to know that Felicia had struggled with drug use and was sent to rehab for this storyline to work. The reason why could've been saved for later, and it would've made for a more interesting reveal. Maybe just have Felicia allude to seeing something that night, but don't tell the viewers right away what it was.

In 1x06, Felicia is incredibly upset when she hears that her dad was the one who told Klara's family what happened to Felicia in the US. And rightly so.

Felicia: Don’t you get it? You ruined everything! Mats: What? Felicia: You told the whole damn town about me! About the US! Mats: I really didn’t mean to disclose you- Or disclose us. Sorry. Hey, sorry. Flisan, please. Hey. Felicia: Did you tell them you fucked mom’s best friend too? Yes, I saw you.

If this had been the moment where we first find out what Felicia saw, it would've been more surprising. Our reaction would've mirrored Mats's, and it would've been more heart-wrenching to know that Felicia was traumatized by an affair her dad had only to be cheated on herself in the very same episode.

Ludde's problematic nature

One of the scriptwriters of Eagles, Fanny Ekstrand, was interviewed in the behind-the-scenes documentary Edvins Skådisdrömmar. In this interview, she states:

Ludvig, he's the one who's been the easiest to retain the personality of. Because he's so... He's calm and friendly, but he makes dumb decisions. Ludvig isn't a typical hockey guy. He has a bunch of other qualities—music being one of them.

I found myself slightly disagreeing with this take, despite knowing Ekstrand is literally a part of the writing team and most likely helped shaped Ludde's personality. I just interpreted Ludde's character (at least in season 1) differently.

I also didn't find him that much different from any other typical hockey guy just because he happens to have another interest. That's a bit like saying Archie Andrews from The CW's Riverdale isn't a stereotypical jock because he also plays the guitar.

In season 1, we see Ludde break into the rink because he wanted to test out the ice. He just loves hockey that much. He also uses it as a way to express frustration and anger, which we saw in 1x05. He flirts with the new girl in school and in the beginning he even uses it as a tactic to gain a position on the main hockey team. This was confirmed by the creator Stefan H. Lindén in his Q&A, where he said:

My idea has always been that Ludde was blown away by Felicia and that he really likes her but that they both initially interacted and met to go swimming because Felicia knew it would piss her dad off and Ludde knew that it might throw Elias off since they were competing for the same position in the team.

I would say that the characteristics of a typical hockey guy would be someone like Adam—obsessed with the sport, flirting with girls, going to parties, and just spending a lot of time in the rink. Ludde checks off all of these points. However, I will give this the benefit of the doubt since season 2 Ludde seems to change a lot and it's easier to interpret him as the calm and friendly guy he was supposed to be in season 1.

So to me, Ludde wasn't calm and friendly at all. In season 2, yes, but when we're first introduced to him?

Ludde shows anger issues and violent tendencies in 1x05 when he head-butts Elias and breaks his nose. It's violent and messy. He then yells at Felicia to leave when she's trying to communicate with him and belittles her drug problems solely because she's rich. To me, Ludde wasn't a nice person in 1x04 either when he let his friends make suggestive comments about Felicia and what she was like in bed.

Omar: I can tell you one thing - you’re not borrowing my towel today cause I don’t know where that dick has been. Adam: It’s nice when she sucks, right? Omar: Can’t you tell us some more, does she bite you or is it just really, really nice? [...] Adam: Is that what you sound like when you’re coming? What does she sound like?

This was described as "locker room talk" and the writers probably wanted to show an authentic view of what being a hockey player is like. I understand that. But it's a little problematic when it's later swept under the rug and treated like something that we're just supposed to accept.

Elias: [...] it’s not very fun to sit in a hockey locker room where people are talking about how nice it is to fuck my sister. Felicia: Ludde would never say anything like that, you know that. Elias: He wouldn’t? It’s a locker room, Felicia. That’s the only thing they talk about.

It did not sit right with me how Felicia seemed to be the one Elias blamed in this scene, and Ludde and his friends never faced any real consequences for what they said. Elias did lash out at Ludde, but there was no severe consequence for Omar and Adam's comments.

Compare this scenario to another Swedish show, Beartown on HBO. Beartown is similar to Eagles and focuses on a hockey team in a small town with one of the star players hooking up with a girl who's recently moved to their small town.

This girl is raped by the hockey player. And because of his status as the star of the team, he has almost the whole school behind him. The girl however is labeled as a lying slut. It's unfair and frustrating to see it happen, but it's authentic and done in a way that doesn't glamorize the ugly side of hockey culture.

Eagles is not as dark as Beartown so this comparison might be a little unfair. Beartown's whole storyline did revolve around this incident while in Eagles the hockey culture is treated more as a side thought. It's like they decided to throw in a taste of what goes on in a locker room just to create drama without really addressing it further.

Beartown did a much better job of portraying the problematic and toxic elements of hockey culture without making it seem like it's just something normal that we should accept. It was honest and raw. If you haven't seen the show, this short video does a great job of depicting how much thought was put into the toxic hockey culture, winning mentality, and subsequently hockey players thinking they're entitled to do whatever they want.

So, to respond to Ekstrand's quote from Edvins Skådisdrömmar—I did not experience Ludde as a "good guy" who only makes dumb decisions at all. In season 1, he's a bad person for letting his friends sexualize a girl he likes and letting her brother hear their disgusting comments. He's a bad person for fighting with her brother and later yelling at her, saying her drug issues are insignificant despite acting supportive of her only two episodes earlier.

I don't mind conflicts like these because they drive the story forward. I didn't particularly like Ludde in season 1 because of the reasons I just stated, but they're necessary to create drama and make the show interesting.

It's just weird to me how one of the writers is saying that Ludde is a calm person and a good guy when that is not at all how I interpreted his character.

Eagles is a show targeted towards a young audience, among them probably a lot of easily influenced pre-teens. What kind of message does this send to them when the guy letting his friends sexualize a girl he's slept with and on top of that laughing at their inappropriate comments is referred to as the good guy?

Klara is mean... What else?

From the moment we're introduced to Klara, it seems obvious that she'll play a living and breathing version of the infamous Alpha Bitch trope. She's also a prime example of the basic Popular is Evil trope and has her own Girl Posse consisting of Sara and Amie.

Klara feels threatened by the arrival of a potential new popular girl, Felicia, and does everything in her power to bully Felicia to show dominance. She barely shows any good sides of herself.

The only instance I can think of where we sort of see season 1 Klara in a positive light is when she talks to Amie in 1x05 about their friendship and then accompanies Amie to her audition for the school band.

Klara: Ever since Felicia started at school… It’s felt like you only hang out with her and that you’ve forgotten about me. She like took you from me. Amie: But I haven’t forgotten you. Klara: No, but do you get what I mean? Amie: I get it, but I haven’t forgotten you. Klara: No, I know. Amie: I know, but it just turned out that way when school started. Klara: Okay. Amie: But I’m sorry. Klara: It’s fine. Amie: Are you sure? Klara: Yeah. You can make it up to me when you go on your world tour.

Klara is really supportive of Amie's musical endeavors, but she also uses her support as a way to alienate Felicia from the girl group. It's very on the nose and kind of feels suffocating in the way it's written.

Klara: Amie, did you remove the clips? Amie: Yeah, she said they weren’t good. Klara: She’s just jealous. It’s so obvious. I mean, I’m jealous. You sing absolutely amazing. I don’t know, I just think it was really rude of her to sit in the cafeteria and criticize you like that Amie: Yeah, maybe. But she apologized. Klara: But still. That clip of you in the bathroom… Like… Sorry, but I’d be so mad if someone had posted something like that of me. I mean, you were standing there without makeup, completely non-fixed up. And the whole thing with her filming you without you knowing. That’s really weird. You don’t do that. Don’t you think so?

I'm sure there are plenty of people who act like this in real life. And maybe that's part of the problem, because Klara in season 1 really isn't an interesting character. We've met this person before and we know exactly what she's like. There's nothing new to discover. So season 1 is essentially just Klara being petty and rude every chance she gets, and to me it felt like a large part of her character was written just to stir up drama.

In 1x06, we see Klara backstab Amie by filming her making out with Ludde at her Halloween party. But I thought it was established in 1x05 that Klara feels like Amie was taken from her? And if Klara actually cared about Amie and didn't want to lose her as a friend, she wouldn't just stand by and watch with her phone recording the whole thing. It doesn't make a lot of sense.

Klara even made that whole point about how it was really weird of Felicia to film Amie without her knowing. So why would Klara do it, when she expressed that's weird and not something a normal person does? Is that supposed to be foreshadowing? Because if so, that's a clear contradiction and not how foreshadowing works.

When Sara happens to see the video on Klara's phone she immediately says that Klara should delete it.

Sara: What is that? Did they know you were filming? Klara: No, of course they didn’t know. Sara: Oh my god, Klara. You should probably delete it. Klara: I’m going to! But it’s crazy, right? Sara: Yeah, god. But seriously, delete it. Klara: I’m going to.

So Klara says she's going to delete the video. But it's still unclear why it was filmed in the first place if Klara insists that she's going to delete it. It's not like she filmed it just to show it to Sara either, since Sara wasn't meant to see it and only saw it by chance while swiping through Klara's photos on her phone.

It doesn't make sense for Klara to film a video like that of her best friend that she's supposed to care about. It doesn't make sense for Klara to film a video of anybody without their knowledge when she previously made a big deal about how you shouldn't do that.

What Klara's character is, is a bad attempt at the classical mean girl. She's clichéd, boring, and full of tropes.

Even her eventual character development is riddled with tropes like the Heel Realization where a character realizes they're actually one of the bad guys. This realization seems to come in 1x08, where Felicia calls Klara out on her behavior.

Felicia: You know what, Klara. I’m so fucking tired of your fucking comments. You didn’t get to be Lucia this year. Poor you! Was dad unable to fix that? Cry then, Klara. Cry. You’re so fucking mean. Everybody here is tired- Everybody here is scared of you. Even those who liked you once, they can’t take it anymore. Klara: That’s not true. It’s not true. Felicia: Yes, everybody is scared of you. You know what? Look around. Show people some fucking respect. Klara: Well say something, Amie! Amie: What is there to say? She’s right.

Klara needed a wake-up call like this. It's just unfortunate that she goes back to her mean girl behavior and posts the video after Amie insinuated that Klara wasn't a real friend. Klara already knew that Amie felt that way since she said Felicia was right in her assessment of everybody being scared and tired of Klara. So wouldn't it have made more sense for Klara to post the video right after that moment instead of during Amie's performance?

Or rather, why not pull a Subverted Trope and not have Klara post the video at all after she realized how horrible she'd been acting? That would've made me respect her so much more and be a great introduction to her character development in season 2.

The Halloween Incident

To me, the whole Halloween episode was questionable. First off, we never got actual confirmation of what happened in that room between Amie and Ludde. Some viewers insist that they only made out and others believe they went all the way. Here's what the creator of the show, Stefan H. Lindén, had to say about this in a Q&A post he did:

I think if you went into the writers room of Eagles and asked all of us what really happened in that room [between Ludde and Amie at Klara's Halloween party] we would all have different answers. I know what happened, but I’m not sure we will ever truly know for sure, unless Ludvig or Amie eventually are open enough to admit to anyone what really happened.

This is kind of a vague answer, but that's fair considering that when Stefan did this Q&A the latest episode that had been released was 2x05 and he probably didn't want to spoil anything. However, looking back at this answer knowing how the season turned out I still feel like it's unclear what happened. It's also strange that Stefan seems to be saying that they never actually decided what happened between them since the writers "would all have different answers".

1x06 was just an odd episode for me overall. Lots of things felt rushed and underdeveloped. Let's not forget that this episode also contained, in my opinion, some of the weirdest lines in the whole show (along with Elias's strange monologue about plague vampires).

Ludde: Hey, I only have like 3%. Do you have any power? Adam: Are you wondering if I have a power bank in my shorts? It’s coming-

Ludde: I like shellfish. (said to Amie, wearing a lobster costume)

Up until this episode, Ludde has shown zero interest and attraction towards Amie. We are basically told that Ludde only hooked up with Amie because he was so drunk that he practically had no idea what he was doing.

In 1x02, we see a drunk Amie try to kiss Tobbe and upon getting rejected she moves on to make out with Adam. She gets overly friendly when she's drunk so the fact that she makes out with Ludde later is... Weird, but not entirely out of the realms of possibility.

Ludde on the other hand is moping about Felicia all night. He regrets how he yelled at her at the end of 1x05 and it shows. He's trying to drown all his problems in alcohol and it seems to be working, because when it enters his system he seems to be on top of the world.

What I found kind of ambiguous in this incident was if Ludde even remembered what happened that night. He was drinking so much compared to Amie, who doesn't really need as much alcohol before she reaches her "overly friendly" state. I thought for sure that Ludde was oblivious to the situation when he woke up in his bed the next day and immediately messaged Felicia.

There are just so many questions to unpack here that were never answered. What prompted Amie and Ludde to go into that empty room? Why did Ludde come with her? Why didn't Adam seem to care about this, when he'd been sitting next to Ludde and taking care of him most of the night? And as I wrote before, why would Klara film this video of her best friend when she previously expressed that was a weird thing to do?

There's just too much in 1x06 left unanswered. The Amie/Ludde hook-up was a badly executed plot twist because there wasn't anything hinting that this would happen. It just came out of nowhere.

Unbalanced screentime and Elias's wasted potential

A large portion of season 1 was dedicated to Felicia. This was kind of a let-down for me since I thought more focus would be placed on Eagles as a hockey team (after all, that's what the show is named after). I also thought more attention would be on Elias since he's the talented star player who's supposed to live up to his father's legacy.

The show starts with a couple radio hosts hyping up how Elias Kroon, son of the legendary Mats Kroon, is going to join the Eagles hockey team.

Host #1: [...] It’s finally official. New center in the junior team - Elias Kroon, son to the legendary NHL-pro Mats Kroon, who has now chosen to move home from the US to his hometown where Elias will play in his father’s old club Oskarshamn Eagles. Host #2: This is so freaking cool. Who doesn’t want a Kroon on their team? Host #1: We hope that he’ll take a spot on the A-team.

But we don't learn a lot about who Elias actually is in the first episode. The attention is on Felicia and her interest in Ludde.

Elias is so discarded that he barely has anything to say in the first couple of scenes we see him in. Here are all his eight lines in 1x01, and I'm not even joking.

Elias: Yes. Elias: Shut up. Elias: Ow. Elias: It's fine. Elias: Really? Elias: Fucking hell. Elias: I'll stay here. Elias: No, it's fine.

In 1x02 he has even fewer lines. Three, to be exact, and all he says is that his injury is a sprain and that it's fine. Essentially just an echo of two of the lines he had in the previous episode. It's nothing new.

There's a way to have a character stand out when they don't have many lines, but Elias just fades into the background with every other extra. There's too much time spent on having other characters talk about Elias than us actually getting to know him. So when we do meet him, it's pretty underwhelming.

Compare Elias to his sister who gets so much more attention from the writers. I don't really understand why either, since I thought Elias was a much more interesting character than his influencer sister. Felicia's character only seems to revolve around a guy. I wonder how many times we've seen that before?

In 1x02 we see the Eagles hockey team play their first game, but Elias is unable to play and has to sit in the stands for what was supposed to be his debut match. Why? Because during a hockey practice session in 1x01, Adam rams his stick into Elias to purposely injure him. I mean, fair enough. Adam is trying to get Ludde on the main team since he and Elias are competing for the same position. The shot of Adam smiling after Elias sprains his wrist is a bit too on the nose, but whatever.

What this does is minimize Elias' presence in season 1 by a lot. We don't see the son of the legendary NHL professional play an actual game until 1x05, which is more than halfway into the season. It's kind of disappointing but I understand the injury is done to dramatize his situation.

Elias barely gets his own storylines in the first few episodes. He just has things done to him instead of acting on his own. When we do see him on screen he gets injured by Adam, reprimanded by his father, and later told he can't play in his debut game.

His sweet side (or any side of him, really) isn't shown until 1x03 when Amie wakes up at the Kroon house and Elias reassures her that they didn't do anything together and that she can borrow Felicia's clothes.

Elias doesn't really do much for the plot until he hears Ludde's friends objectify Felicia and he starts a fight with Ludde and confronts Felicia about it. That's when it feels like Elias is actually a part of this show instead of just being an extra shoved into the background. His actions are finally affecting the plot.

Elias's potential in season 1 was hugely wasted. The only episode where we actually got to see him shine was 1x07, when he travels to Karlskrona with Amie. We find out he doesn't want the hockey arrangement his dad has planned for him and that he's actually a pretty goofy guy who likes making jokes (and eating green candy).

If less time was spent with Felicia and the distribution of every episode's 20 minutes was more balanced, season 1 could've been massively improved. It got much better in season 2, but season 1 suffered and made many people think that Felicia was a basic and unentertaining character.

The side characters and their comic relief

So one thing that I found really disappointing with Felicia's amount of screentime is that we barely got enough time for the other main characters, let alone the side characters.

What I mean here is that the only people we really know on the Eagles hockey team are Ludde and Elias. Ludde's friends, Adam and Omar, just feel like comic relief sidekicks. We don't really know what they're like, besides the fact that they like to make jokes and mess around.

This issue is largely created by the short running time the episodes have along with season 1 only having eight episodes in total. That's definitely understandable. It did get better in season 3 where we see Ludde having a deeper conversation with Adam and Omar and they finally don't just feel like the comic relief characters, but actual people with layers.

Ludde: I’m going to quit hockey. Adam: Are you serious? Omar: What the hell are you saying? Ludde: It’s not the same anymore. I’m not passionate about it. I… Yes, it sucks, but… I’ve thought about it for a while now. Omar: We make jokes about it and all, but… Yeah. It wouldn’t be the same without you. Kingelikingen. Adam: I get that it’s a tough choice. But yeah… You’ll work things out. You and Felicia. You always do. Ludde: You guys are pretty awesome sometimes, actually.

This scene was really sweet, and I wish we could've had moments like this between the guys in season 1. Just one scene to show that they're not just the "typical hockey guys". It feels like Ludde was the only person on the team in season 1 who wasn't just a background character. Even Elias, who you would assume should be at the forefront, isn't properly developed until 1x05 where we see him defending his sister and starting a fight with Ludde. Otherwise, it very much felt like Elias was kept in the background.

There are also guys on the team called Herman, Simon, Näslund, Ekbäck, Hoffmann, Berglund (even Montell, which was a fun nod to the show's director)... But who are they, actually? Do you even remember their names? To be honest with you, I don't. Because they're just names—not actual characters.

None of the other guys on the team get any depth. They're just sort of there as extras and to give the audience a sense of comedy with their "hockey team shenanigans". This was illustrated in 1x08, where Adam and Omar make their teammate Liam do a "sexy dance" on a table because he lost his virginity. Or a more extreme example—Jönsson, who only exists to be the comic relief and the unlucky guy who just can't catch a break.

In 2x04, Jönsson is told by Jack to do extra time in the gym and gets told off when he only spends a few minutes on the exercise bike. Later, Jack also makes a joke about how he should get Jönsson a defibrillator. In 2x09 Jönsson invites Ludde, Adam, and Omar to come to his mom's place to hang out. After he's left, Adam makes a comment about how there's no way he's going to "rot" in Jönsson's apartment that doesn't even have a balcony.

Don't get me wrong, these scenes aren't bad and I don't mean they should've been scrapped. Comedy can absolutely have its place in a show like this. Let's take the scene where Ludde flashes a couple of unfortunate old ladies on his first date with Felicia as an example. It feels like something a teenage boy would do to try to make a girl he likes laugh. It's a brief scene and it's nice to see Ludde being able to goof off only moments after talking about Andreas. We know that's a touchy subject for him.

However, it feels slightly overdone sometimes with how almost everybody on the hockey team is only there for comedic purposes and to fill space. It's more refreshing when they're shown to be multi-dimensional. I wish this is something that the writers would've considered when the show is literally titled after the hockey team, yet most of the hockey players are hardly in the story.

To add to this, it felt like Sara and Tobbe completely disappeared from the story in season 2. With Sara we understand that she probably didn't want to hang out with Klara anymore after knowing she filmed the Halloween video and posted it on Instagram, so that's fair. But it would've been nice to see Tobbe stick around in season 2, and I'll get back to why I think that.

The potential of season 1

When I look back on season 1 I feel really nostalgic. No matter how many small details that irked me, I can't deny that the setting of the show is beautiful and I really appreciate the depiction of it. Instead of showing Oskarshamn as a boring small town, we're shown the beauty of it which is incorporated into the storylines.

Some examples would be Ludde and Felicia's first date at Gunnarsö and walk through Havslätt, the gorgeous view of the Oskarshamn harbor from Klara's house Villa Högklint, and Badholmen where the school band performs and we later see Elias and Amie walking by in season 3. All these places are listed on the Eagles Oskarshamn site and I feel like they did a great job tying the storylines in with the locations.

Another aspect of season 1 and its writing that I really enjoyed was Elias and Amie's budding relationship. They just have a natural chemistry together and the dialogue between them also felt authentic and sweet.

Season 1 is just a very polished teen drama overall compared to some of SVT's previous series.

Back in 2007-2010, SVT used to air a soap opera-style show focusing on a few teenagers living in Gothenburg that was called Andra Avenyn (translation: Second Avenue). I was only seven at the time but I watched this show religiously as it aired three times a week. Just mentioning the show brings a lot of nostalgia.

Andra Avenyn amassed around 500 000 viewers per episode and was, just like Eagles, nominated for a Kristallen television award. But how good was it, really? If I take off my rose-colored glasses for a second and actually consider the show's highly dramatized storylines and unlikely scenarios, it had a tendency to drag on (which usually happens with soap operas). It didn't offer a realistic view of teenage life and on IMDb it currently sits at a rating score of 5.6 stars out of 10.

Comparing this old teen series to SVT's newer one, Eagles season 1 was a huge improvement and continues to be the most popular teen series that SVT has aired so far.

This idea and all the characters have lived in Stefan H. Lindéns mind since 2008, while Andra Avenyn was still on the air. It's actually amazing how high the quality of most TV shows has risen since then. Eagles has a rating score of 7.4 out of 10 stars on IMDb and has become internationally known in a way that Andra Avenyn never was.

Eagles season 1 laid the groundwork for SVT's most successful teen series of all time, and that's a huge achievement.

Season 2: "Subverting expectations"

When Eagles came back for season 2, the script made it kind of obvious that the writers had listened to the critique of season 1 being predictable.

I did find season 2 a huge step up from season 1—the directing was so much better and when it came to the script we got a deeper look into all the characters that they hadn't really scratched the surface of in the first season. My main disappointment however was that it felt like they threw in a bunch of weird plot twists just for the sake of "subverting expectations".

The core idea of subverting expectations can be great if done correctly. You lead the audience to believe they know what's going to happen, but then you surprise them with an unexpected and clever twist.

A post in Cinematography written by Mason Leaver defines the phrase of "subverting expectations" as:

[...] a method of surprising the audience with some element of a story, be it the plot, themes, characters, etc. This goes beyond a “twist” in a film. Expectation subversion actively works within the genre of a story, and attempts to reinterpret or subvert the conventions of that genre, breaking patterns in surprising and interesting ways. However, this method of surprising the audience is not always well received- it can sometimes be the source of heavy criticism from fans of the tropes which have been subverted.

This included "unexpected" relationships such as Elias/Klara and Amie/Ludde. The former actually worked, but the latter? Not so much.

Amie's crush on Ludde—make it make sense!

Amie and Ludde were my biggest issue with season 2, and it felt so out of character of Amie to be head over heels for Ludde. They work great as friends but romantically they're a huge mismatch.

But they have music in common, I hear you say. Yes, they do. But having a shared interest doesn't mean people are automatically a good match. You have to consider their chemistry and overall compatibility.

Before actors are cast in a show or movie where their characters will be romantically involved with each other, it's common to do what's called a chemistry read. Here's a neat description from an article in Backstage written by Caroline Liem:

Chemistry is the complex emotional or psychological interaction between two people. If this were a romantic article, it would be about love. Instead, we are discussing the astonishing rapport between two actors, and how that connection is achieved in order to book [...] the role. A chemistry read is an opportunity to read with actors being considered for a role opposite yours, usually lead roles. The main purpose is to see how you instinctively connect and work with the other actor.

This obviously wasn't done for the actors playing Amie and Ludde, since there didn't seem to be any intention of having their characters be involved in a romantic relationship.

That was even confirmed by Stefan H. Lindén in his Q&A of season 2, where he said that a love triangle between Ludde/Felicia/Amie was planned but later scrapped.

I can confirm that from the beginning of development of the series and the first version of the storyline a triangle drama was at some point intended for season 1 but later removed – however when creating the characters, Ludvigs skill in music and arts was always there from the beginning so by knowing that, we always knew that interactions would appear between them. When looking back at Season 1, in the first scene by the lockers when Amie tells Felicia who Ludvig is, she does know exactly who he is and she is well aware of that his friend Tobias is a music guy that Amie wants to get to know. Also when looking at it, when I was the same age as Ludvig and Amie I, and I am sure a lot of people can relate to it, fact is that we never really knew if it was love or friendship in the beginning.

Knowing that the triangle drama was scrapped for season 1, it makes sense why it seems so arbitrary. There was no groundwork laid down for this pairing before it was hastily thrown together in 1x06 for a cheap plot twist. This continues in season 2, where Amie and Ludde start spending more time together. Yet it's hard to see Ludde as a potential love interest for Amie in the way the writers want us to. They still come off as friends despite having hooked up at a party.

I mentioned that Tobbe should've stuck around for season 2 and here's why. Tobbe was written to be the leader of the school band that Amie later joins, and he was friends with Ludde before the video was posted. He would've been a perfect fit for the Amie/Ludde music storyline but he's completely absent. He had the potential to be the person who could've helped them with the song a little and then later picked up on whatever there was going on between them.

I think the Amie/Ludde storyline could've hugely benefitted from a scene between Amie and Tobbe, where Tobbe asks if she actually has feelings for Ludde and we get to hear exactly what Amie is feeling. Maybe she's torn, not wanting to get together with Ludde because of how much they hurt Felicia, but at the same time finds it hard to suppress her feelings. A scene like that would've allowed us to get into Amie's head and make the Amie/Ludde storyline much clearer.

To add, this storyline was in desperate need of more interest from Ludde's side. There needed to be some indication from him that would make Amie believe he liked him back, even if that wasn't the case. All we get is Ludde complimenting Amie's song and then a hug in 2x05 when Amie says the record label in Stockholm wanted a meeting. And apparently, that was enough for Amie to think Ludde was interested in her despite him blowing off the Stockholm meeting and Amie hearing Ludde say that the Halloween incident was a mistake.

Ludde and Amie don't really mesh as well as Elias/Amie do or even as well as Ludde/Felicia do. Elias and Amie had sparks flying from the very first scene they shared. That pairing is one of the main reasons why the show became popular internationally, and why is that? Because of the actors' chemistry.

Amie and Ludde are a clumsy attempt at throwing together two people who don't really work together with the intention of "subverting expectations". And I suppose that's what the writers wanted to depict—an awkward crush that doesn't really make sense, which I'm sure many people have experienced as a teenager. That part is fine. But what I didn't like about this storyline is that Amie had no good reason to believe Ludde would be interested in anything with her beyond a platonic friendship.

While season 2 was airing, I was convinced that Amie wasn't actually in love with Ludde. She was just lonely after the aftermath of the Halloween video and mistook her feelings for Ludde as love when she just appreciated his company. Here's what I wrote:

So as we know, Amie kissed Ludde in episode 6 when he was in the hospital after having been injured during the hockey game against Karlskrona. She immediately seemed to regret having done that and ran out without an explanation, leaving Ludde alone and confused. I honestly don’t think Amie has any romantic feelings towards Ludde. I think she might mistake her feelings for a crush or something, when in reality she’s just lonely and appreciates Ludde always being there for her and giving her compliments on her musical ability. Ludde was complimenting Amie at the hospital, saying she was amazing, and I think Amie was just really touched by that and maybe wanted to thank him somehow, and ended up kissing him. And then she freaked out and left because oh my god did she really just kiss Ludde. It was an uncomfortable and awkward situation and that’s probably why she ran out. However, I really believe that if she had just stayed to explain and apologize, Ludde would understand and they could’ve just laughed it off. But this is a drama show so of course that wouldn’t happen! Do I think the writers are making them into a couple? No, definitely not. They know that season 1 was sort of predictable and cliché, so they’re making season 2 as different as possible by including these unexpected pairings such as Klara & Elias and Amie & Ludde. But Amie and Ludde won’t ever be a couple, because Ludde is still very much hung up on Felicia. I don’t see them as a couple either - yes, they have music in common, but they work way better as friends than in a relationship.

In Edvins Skådisdrömmar, which is a behind-the-scenes documentary of Eagles season 2, writers Fanny Ekstrand and Michaela Hamilton discuss the writing of the show in the documentary's third episode. The third episode is mostly focused on the lead-up to the scene where Amie kisses Ludde at the hospital. Adrian Öjvindsson, who plays Ludde, says:

Filming the kissing scene was [...] awkward and weird, actually. And that's how it ended up. Yandeh and I haven't really had any intimate scenes. In this case you could take in that it was weird, because that's also what the scene wanted to depict.

When Edvin reads the script, he describes the scene as a "nightmare" scenario. I agree. And the lazy build-up to this Awkward Kiss trope doesn't make it any better, because just like the Halloween incident this doesn't make a lot of sense.

It's supposed to be awkward and weird, just like Adrian said. But he also mentioned one of the most important details: Yandeh and I haven't really had any intimate scenes.

Before this kiss scene, there was nothing that indicated any chemistry between them. No accidental hand-touching, no longing stares, no nothing. Just a friendly hug. A proper build-up to the kiss scene would've made it feel less out of place.

The love confession from Amie to Ludde in 2x10 really threw me off as well. The confession to me made no sense and honestly felt like a prank call. There was no feeling behind it and zero reason for Amie to believe that there was a chance Ludde liked her back.

At the end of 2x08, Felicia goes to Ludde's house after he's confessed the truth to the police about the Andreas situation. Amie happens to overhear the conversation and she hears Ludde very clearly say that he's not interested in Amie.

Ludde: Felicia, there’s nothing between us. Between me and Amie. It was really the biggest mistake of my life. Felicia: Goodbye, Ludde. Ludde: Felicia, please!

Amie, now having her heart broken, crosses Ludde's name off the contract while crying. She knows he doesn't feel the same. So why would Amie even bother to call Ludde up to tell him she's "in love with him"?

Amie: [...] Hey, Ludde… Ludde: Yeah? Amie: It feels really weird to hear our song now. Because I know who the lyrics are about. And… And I… I really like you. Or, well… I’m in love with you. I just need to know how you feel. Or if you feel anything. Just tell me. Ludde: I’ll always want to be your friend, Amie, but… It’s Felicia I’m in love with.

This moment is on par with the awkwardness from the hospital kiss between them in 2x06. The second-hand embarrassment with this one was really rough, and what I don't understand is why this was even added to the script when Amie had already gotten the confirmation that Ludde didn't think of her in a romantic way. This storyline could've ended in 2x08 after Amie overheard the conversation between Ludde and Felicia.

It really didn't need to drag on for the whole season, essentially making Amie's whole storyline in season 2 about a guy. Her moment of finally getting signed to the record label was ruined when it could've been regarded as a fresh start if the storyline had just ended where it should have.

What this storyline did instead was ruining my favorite friendship of season 1, which was Amie/Felicia. This mess made it so hard for them to reconcile and they didn't end up properly addressing it until 3x09, spending almost two whole seasons mad at each other. It sucks that the writers decided to drag out their fighting and disagreements for this long when they could've instead shown two girls in solidarity who don't let a guy get between them and their friendship.

Amie apologized in 3x03 for how she hurt Felicia, but Felicia made it clear in 3x06 that she still harbored ill will towards Amie for what happened at Halloween (which in the timeline of this show was more than a year ago).

Felicia (to Amie): Are you going to start slobbering with [Elias] now too? Just give me back that sweater first, I don’t want slobber on that. Thanks.

I talked about how much I disliked the Amie/Ludde storyline in this post, with my main reason being that it really messed up the character dynamics that were established in season 1.

This storyline [of Ludde and Amie hooking up]—along with Amie falling in love with Ludde—is by far my least favorite one because it messed up the whole character dynamic. I feel like Amie and Felicia won’t ever go back to the kind of friendship they had in season 1 before the Halloween incident because the trust was so broken, and Amie really should’ve tried harder to apologize to Felicia like Ludde did instead of going after her best friend’s ex in season 2.

If there's just one thing I could change about this show, I would 100% get rid of the Amie/Ludde storylines. There is nothing that annoyed me as much as those storylines did.

Amie's musical ambitions

I've talked about this a bit before in another post because this was something that really bugged me about Amie's character in season 2. Here's what I wrote:

I honestly still feel like Amie’s whole storyline with sending in a rather basic demo written by two teenagers with little to no experience and then getting praised on it [by the Stockholm music producers] with comments such as “it’s going to be a real summer hit” felt so unrealistic to me. Maybe they only said that so Amie would accept their offer or something, but that’s still very strange because she would have still said yes without a doubt. I can understand that they thought Amie was marketable as a person and there was this bonus with her having gone viral before on Felicia’s Instagram, but that demo did not seem good enough for me to be immediately released as a single and then have them decide on the spot that Amie would be given a contract. I mean, come on. It never felt earned because we never really saw Amie struggling with her songwriting journey to achieve this dream. Sending in one demo to one record label and having them immediately want to make a whole album with you just doesn’t happen in real life unless the song is extremely good or you have a very unique voice. Amie is really talented but there are hundreds of people just like her, if not thousands. I was never convinced by her getting signed so quickly in season 2. I understand that they wanted to establish her as a successful artist [at the beginning of season 3], but that felt so rushed. I was so sure that the record label would screw her over and steal the song rights to record it with another artist who was already established, and that we’d have to see Amie work even harder to achieve her dreams. But we didn’t get that at all. Where was the struggle? [...] Of course I wanted to see Amie achieve success (and I was happy when she did), but the journey there was so bizarrely easy. She didn’t start to seriously work on making her music career become a reality until season 2. Amie had dabbled in music prior to that, like when she auditioned for the school band and did that performance of Follow, but she didn’t truly start to work towards it until season 2 when she decided to have her work sent to professionals in the business. And then, just five episodes later, she gets contacted by the record label in Stockholm. To put this into context—season 2 took place somewhere around March, and episode 5 around three weeks into April. So when Ludde first started helping Amie it took less than two months for her to get signed. You could argue that the song was just that good or that Amie is just that talented, but it never felt like a realistic storyline to me.

It's tricky to write a storyline like this when you only have ten 20 minute episodes in the season and a limited amount of screentime for every character. All that is understandable. But it's strange that they didn't opt for a time jump to really sell this storyline and make it believable.

Eagles uses time jumps a lot, but somehow this particular plot point was omitted from that and kind of glossed over. I don't really understand how they expected us to buy this storyline. The viewers aren't stupid, and more effort should've been put into this storyline.

In the post where I wrote this, @gajana18 also had an interesting thing to add:

[...] it's equally unrealistic that this huge record company would be hounding Amie, a teenage onehit wonder essentially to come back to the label- don’t they have other bigger artists?

This is a very strong point. Considering how Amie kept expressing that she wanted to finish school and then proceeded to ignore their calls, it's weird that they didn't just decide to discard her contract when Amie clearly wasn't taking her singing career as seriously as they wanted her to.

So, back to season 2. Maybe they could've gone with the record label stealing the rights to Amie's first song and screwing her over. This fuels her to try again and after a time jump of a few months we see Amie having worked really hard on a new and better song. Maybe even a whole album. And this time, she's learned from her past mistakes and improved her songwriting. This time, she's successful in her endeavor and it feels so much more earned after knowing the struggles she's been through to get there.

I also feel like a storyline like that would've made people sympathize with Amie more in season 2. It was really hard to root for her when she had nearly screwed Ludde over by not giving credit to his songwriting and saying "fuck him" when he didn't return Amie's feelings.

Klara's character development

When we're introduced to Klara in season 1, she's a stereotypical mean girl with wealthy parents who is the popular girl at school and has her own followers.

In season 2, the writers decided to develop the character. We find out Klara has issues at home and her mom is barely there. When she is, her parents will start fighting. Klara is feeling really lonely and doesn't really hang out with her friend Sara as much as she used to.

I appreciated the added depth, but it seemed like a drastic shift. The changed perspective could attribute to that but when you step back and really look at s1 Klara and s2 Klara, they're like two completely different people.

Maybe Klara's reputation suffered after she posted the Halloween video? Maybe she had a change of heart after Felicia finally confronted her during Lucia? I mean, I guess.

But what most fans (including me) didn't like about Klara in season 2 was that there were no clear consequences for her after she posted the Halloween video. Klara still hangs out with what seems to be the popular crowd and she has people to go out with. In a post I wrote last year about my thoughts on season 2, I wrote this:

I actually wish that Klara would’ve become more ostracized from her school friends to emphasize how alone she is, but she seems to still be pretty popular so that was kind of disappointing. I thought the fall-out of her posting the video would be worse, but I guess not. Anyway, I like that they’re taking a disliked character and making her into a better person. Feels like it’s been done a few times before, but I still appreciate them doing it. I hated s1 Klara for being so one-dimensional, but s2 Klara is well on her way to being a pretty good and nuanced character.

Her character development sort of comes a little out of nowhere, though. Her reputation wasn't ruined by posting that video and she didn't really lose any friends besides Sara (she had already lost Amie prior to posting that video considering what Amie said to her after Lucia in 1x08).

So what prompted Klara to become this whole new person who actually considers other people's feelings in a relatively short amount of time? Here's a conversation between Felicia and Klara in 2x07.

Felicia: Was there anything in particular you wanted to talk about? I understand that we’re not best friends just because you and Elias are together. We’re not here without a reason, right? Klara: No, I get that this feels weird for you. And if you don’t trust me after everything that’s happened - or that I’ve done. Felicia: Klara… Klara: I know that I haven’t acted like the world’s best person. And I regret that. Sorry.

But why does Klara regret her past behavior? What made her realize she hadn't acted like the "world's best person" if the ramifications from posting the Halloween video were so minimal?

Was it the relationship with Elias that made Klara change? No, I don't think so. When they first start talking at the bar in 2x03, Elias tells Klara that he doesn't always agree with Felicia and that he has his own viewpoints. In 2x07, he says Klara wasn't the one who messed up, but rather Amie and Ludde. And in 2x09, the script tells us that the Elias/Klara relationship seemed to bring more change to Elias rather than Klara.

Felicia: What did you do to him? Klara: What? Felicia: He’s smiling. Elias is like a whole new person since he met you. Klara: Stop. Felicia: I mean it!

So what made Klara change? In 1x08 she's mocking Felicia's drug problems and posts a video that will for sure ruin Amie's reputation. But at the start of season 2, she's suddenly become more withdrawn and considerate of people's feelings.

I can only name one factor that actually makes sense, and that's the fighting between her parents. Klara seems to turn into this quiet child when she has to listen to her mom and dad yelling at each other. This is something that didn't really begin until season 2, when Ola's company GECED started going under. This storyline was very well done.

But the other things, like Klara's reputation and friend group which you would assume would be affected, remain as they were in season 1.

Jack's sudden character change

Jack came into season 2 as a charming and charismatic character, seemingly fooling everybody into thinking he was a good guy. He knew the Kroon family from before and both Felicia and Elias were none the wiser when it came to the eventual reveal of his true colors.

Here's what Stefan H. Lindén had to say about the Jack character in his season 2 Q&A:

Bringing Jack in was actually originally not my idea, it came from my writer colleagues after that they revised my storyline notes for Season 2, while I was still down in Oskarshamn shooting Season 1. We had always intended for a character to come in and raise the stakes but I never imagined it to be Jack. When we started to develop the character, we all started liking him so he was kept in the story. Like with any new character we never really know who they are and what [the] point of them for coming in is [...]

Personally, I feel like the point of Jack's character is pretty obvious. When he first comes to Oskarshamn he is very much the embodiment of the new love interest coming in to date the girl who has broken up with her previous lover, while the previous lover still loves her and does anything he can to get her back although she's dating someone new. Jack is the Romantic False Lead trope who later becomes an alpha-dog Jerkass.

What I found interesting about Jack compared to Klara (in season 1) is that Jack isn't just a bad guy. He's very clever with his manipulation tactics and can easily charm people with his good looks and charisma.

When Felicia accuses Jack of cheating in 2x07, he manages to spin the whole thing around and make Felicia apologize to him and say it was stupid of her to believe he would cheat on her. I talked about this in a post while the season still aired, before Jack's true colors were revealed. Here's what I wrote:

I still don’t know if Jack really is cheating on Felicia with Olivia (the girl that texted him) but I would say he is. Jack is incredibly confident and charming, which makes him able to easily lie and manipulate people. We know he’s not an entirely good person since he’s already lied to Elias about not knowing that Mats would bring him back to Eagles. I wouldn’t be surprised if he really did hook up with Olivia and ended up being a really good liar. The fact is that not only did he deny it but he then shamed Felicia for blaming him and causing a scene, ultimately shifting the focus in the argument to her and making Felicia feel bad that she even confronted him in the first place. Jack says that maybe they shouldn’t even be together, which causes Felicia to backtrack and apologize. It’s actually pretty impressive how Jack was able to spin that around to blame Felicia and make her apologize.

Jack is able to take a small detail and use it as ammunition to get what he wants. In this situation, he brings up the girl in the Stockholm club that Felicia partied with and also kissed.

Jack: You shouldn’t accuse me, either. Felicia: What? Jack: I saw on Instagram, you and some girl in Stockholm. Have I whined about that? Coming here and blaming me for things, it feels really immature. Felicia: Fuck. Sorry, Jack.

Jack wasn't bothered by that at all. It happened before Felicia and Jack were even an official couple, and all they had done was hooking up at a party while Felicia was high. Jack, having cheated on Felicia, couldn't care less about the random girl Felicia kissed. That was just something he used to manipulate her.

When we discover that Jack is actually cheating on Felicia, he immediately reverts to a one-dimensional "evil" character. He's become the 2.0 version of Klara in season 1—written in just to stir up drama.

This "master manipulator" version of him just goes down the drain and Jack turns into a manchild who starts petty fights, files a police report because Ludde pushed him, and says to Felicia "I'm gonna tell on you!". Alright, maybe those weren't his exact words, but you know what I mean. It's a sudden shift and you start wondering how Jack was able to hide this version of himself so well before.

In 3x05, Jack sees Ludde and Andreas after a hockey game and fumbles trying to find any insult he can to hurl at Ludde. Everything he says from that point on is just line after line to really solidify that Jack is the bad guy. You didn't forget that, right? Here, let's have Jack call Felicia a druggie so you know just how shitty he is. And have him call Andreas a junkie later for good measure—there, that should be enough for people to understand that Jack is the villain here.

Jack: Johansson! Ludde: What the hell are you doing here? Jack: What does it look like? Ludde: I guess it’s you I should thank for the victory. Nice work. Jack: What is Felicia doing these days, then? Does she miss me? Ludde: Hey, you’re shutting up now, do you get it?! Jack: Jesus Christ. Do you think you can save her? What do you think she even sees in you? You two play in different leagues, Ludde. Ludde: You have no idea what we’re like. Jack: Come on! You should leave her. While you can. She’ll just pull you down into the dirt with her. You’re no hero, Ludde. Isn’t she still doing drugs? Once a druggie, always a druggie, right?

Jack is a horrible person, but at least he was able to pretend to be a good guy in season 2. And that was actually really fascinating. I wish we could've seen more of Jack's manipulative side that he showed in season 2 instead of making everything coming out of his mouth be a half-assed attempt at insulting the other person. That's a pretty boring villain, in my opinion.

Jack's backstory of his father being an alcoholic and him starting to resent the whole Kroon family because they had everything growing up while he didn't is interesting. It would've also made more sense if his anger was only directed towards the Kroon family since they're the ones he grew up with. They're the ones he was after the whole time.

His anger towards them feels cheapened when Jack also starts insulting Andreas (who he's probably never met before) for no good reason. It's like Jack's human qualities are just gone and all that's left is this empty shell made to start fights. His backstory didn't really make anybody sympathize with him, either.

The improvements of season 2

What I liked about the writing in season 2 was that they explored new ideas and had some solid storylines (besides the mess that was Amie and Ludde). Elias and Klara actually worked pretty well as a couple, even if they were pretty much the 2.0 version of Felicia/Ludde as the "wealthy, popular pretty girl starts dating the star player on the sports team".

Felicia finally gets some more depth. The scene at the end of 2x02, where Felicia and Leila park their car near the harbor and just start crying, is so powerful.

2x05 is also one of my favorite episodes of the show, as well as the ending montage of the 2x10 season finale. In Gameday, we had a very touching scene between Felicia and Mats where they finally communicate. It's not the most understanding conversation but it's a start. It's an interesting contrast between their talk in 1x06 where Felicia revealed she saw Mats cheating on Leila versus the talk they're having now.

Another one of my favorite scenes is when Felicia and Ludde meet up at their bench in 2x10 after Ludde has called her up asking Felicia to come if there's any chance of them getting back together.

The dialogue is simple and to the point. There's no long-winded love confession for the sake of drama. It's a moment that the whole season has been building up for, and when we finally get there we realize that this is how love should be.

Easy and simple.

Ludde: You came back. Felicia: Yeah, I did. Ludde: Do you remember our first date here? Felicia: No. I’ve forgotten. Ludde: I was so freaking nervous. Felicia: Everything you said… Did you mean it? Because you hurt me, Ludvig. And I… I’ve really tried to hurt you back, but… It’s not possible. I can’t… Not love you. Do you think… Do you think it can be us again? Ludde: What do you think? Felicia: I don’t want anything else.

Ludde admitting how nervous he was on their first date is sweet and shows us how much they've been through. Felicia is struggling to find the words to say and she's acknowledging how hurt she was, but still can't seem to find it in her heart to hate Ludde. It's honest.

Another plotline that I think was a little underrated in season 2 is the GECED company going bankrupt and Ola, Klara's dad, is under investigation for financial crime. This isn't a storyline you would usually see in a teen series. It's much more serious. It also gave us a really touching and poignant scene in 2x08 between Ola and Klara sitting on the floor of his office, where Klara has to comfort her father who starts crying.

Ola: When you were little you used to sit like this. On the floor, while I was working. You had your own room, but you wanted to sit with me. “Help daddy work”. Mom’s doing the right thing by leaving for a while, don’t blame her for that. Klara: What, you can’t just leave because things get a little tough. Ola: Maybe you should get away for a while too. You know, I never wanted you two to… That you… Everything’s gone. Klara: It will be fine. It will be fine. Ola: Sorry. I’m sorry.

In 2x09, Klara is at a party when she notices a bunch of missed calls from her dad. She immediately senses something is wrong and rushes home to find her dad having attempted suicide. It's executed very well and I really liked the more serious tone they went for in season 2.

It set up season 3 perfectly, which continued with the darker themes but balanced them very well with the more light-hearted moments.

Season 3: Finding one's footing

Season 3 was a highly anticipated season. I thought the season 2 finale was masterfully done and it left me wanting more. When season 1 finished on its cliffhanger of the video leaking, the focus only seemed to be on that.

But with season 2 there's Felicia/Ludde getting back together and Ludde having been sued by Jack, Jack threatening that he would leak all of the Kroon's family secrets, Klara's dad passing away, Elias deciding to get on the train and go to the draft combine anyway, Amie having finally become a recording artist but being isolated and heartbroken... There's so much to unpack, and it's a lot more interesting than the ending of season 1.

Where's Jack?

Jack is supposed to be the main villain but he's gone for most of the season, failing to show up until 3x05. In the season 2 finale Jack makes a huge deal about how he's going to destroy Felicia's life. He's threatening her in a very violent and abusive way.

Jack: [...] I know a lot about you, Felicia. And your nice family. It’s enough for me to leak to one news site. I can destroy you. Do you get it? I’ll tell them everything. The drugs, the cheating, your abortion! Felicia: Shut up! Jack: Hey. Huh? Did you seriously think I wanted to be with you? The little Kroon princess, who has gotten everything for free her whole fucking life! You and Elias! Like spoiled brats! You don’t understand what it means to fight for something!

In 2x10, Jack decides to report Ludde for assault but he doesn't follow through on destroying this family that he hates. If there's anything Jack seems to despise above all, it should be the Kroon family, right? So why did he fight back with Ludde but not the Kroon family?

I expected Jack to leak all the Kroon secrets at the beginning of season 3, but Felicia seems strangely calm at the funeral which I'm assuming only takes place two weeks or so after Ola's passing in the season 2 finale.

Then, a whole year passes with no indication that Jack is ever going to leak anything. As season 3 was airing, I commented on how strange this felt in an ask I received:

One of my main questions about the time jump is the whole thing with Jack saying he was going to ruin Felicia’s and the Kroon family’s reputation in the press. It seemed like nothing really came of that? I’m pretty sure that detail hasn’t been abandoned entirely and that Jack will come back (we’ve already seen a glimpse of him in the third episode), but it feels strange that Jack threatened to leak all her secrets and then just never did. I got the impression that Jack was a person who, when having his pride wounded, would do pretty much anything to get back at the person who insulted him. And yet there’s no mention of where Jack has been during that time or what he’s been doing. I feel like I would be pretty paranoid about this if I was Felicia, but we don’t see this haunting her until episode 3 when she sees a flash of Jack before realizing it was just some random guy. It seems strange that Felicia was relatively at ease during the funeral (which I assume took place not long after Jack first threatened her) and after the time jump. We don’t really know what’s been going on during that year, but Felicia seems to be fine and like she hasn’t had any thoughts of Jack at all. Maybe she assumed that his threats were empty and that he wouldn’t actually leak anything to the press, which is reasonable but at the same time I don’t understand why Jack has yet to do anything after a year. He was really pissed off in the season 2 finale, after all.

Going to repeat one of the things I wrote here because it deserves to be mentioned twice, and this point is one of my biggest issues.

I got the impression that Jack was a person who, when having his pride wounded, would do pretty much anything to get back at the person who insulted him.

I feel like this was kind of a plot hole that wasn't explained. Jack is ruthless and doesn't hold back at all when his true colors come out. He has no problem talking about the sexual relationship he had with Felicia in front of her father. Jack is just that horrible.

So what prevented him from ruining the Kroon family's lives earlier, when it seems to be the thing he's wanted for years?

Michael's predictable predicament

Michael first appears at the end of 3x04, where he calls Amie up to tell her he's her father.

Man: Hey! Sorry for calling so late. Is it Amie? Amie Condé? Amie: Yeah. Man: I saw you on TV the other day. I’m Michael Condé. I’m your father.

In the next episode, we get a voice-over of the continued conversation between him and Amie.

Michael: [...] I understand if it’s shocking. I’m in Oskarshamn for work for a few weeks and— Could we meet up someday?

So, it's clear what the writers are going for here. It's the estranged father who returns into the child's life when they've become successful. We're made to believe it's a Daddy Had a Good Reason for Abandoning You trope when Michael meets up with Amie and tells her why he left.

Michael: So Petra, she— Has she said anything about me? Amie: Well… That you moved from Sweden before I was born… That you’re working as a lawyer. That you didn’t want to see me. Michael: I was… I was young when we met. Your mom and I. And everything went really fast. I was in love, but she had feelings for somebody else. And when she found out that she— That she was expecting you, then… She didn’t want me there. She said I wasn’t father material. To some degree she might’ve been right, but… I wasn’t much older than you are now. I had just gotten into a law school in Berlin. When I finally came back to Sweden, then… She didn’t let me see you. I had already lost you by then, but I want you to know that I— I’ve thought of you. And about a week ago, I… I’m seeing you. On TV. There you are. With my last name. I’m so proud.

However, it's pretty easy to identify the holes in Michael's story. To be honest this whole storyline was predictable from the very start. Before Michael even came into the story, I made this post which pretty much summed up Michael's whole character when we didn't even know he existed yet (this was when 3x03 was the latest episode that had aired).

I don’t think we’ve heard any mention of Amie’s dad in the whole series except for 3x02 when Amie was being interviewed and was asked about the Condé name where she said that while Samuelsson was from her mother’s side, and Condé was from “the other side”. I found her word choice a little interesting. I don’t think Amie’s dad has passed—but rather that he’s alive and just chosen to not be a part of her life, which is why Petra seemed to be a little offended when asking Amie why she didn’t want her last name anymore. This might also be why Amie said “the other side” rather than “my dad’s side” because they have an estranged relationship. [...] I’m not really sure if they’ll do anything with Amie’s dad (maybe they’ll go for that trope where the parent who previously abandoned their child returns after the child has accomplished something big/something major happened and the parent wants something from them for personal gain?).

When we actually get to meet Michael and hear his explanation of why he left, I wrote this post pointing out some of the holes in this storyline.

Michael meeting Amie only after she’s become famous is a little suspicious, but it’s understandable if he previously thought she didn’t want to meet him and then sees her with his last name on national television. Obviously he would contact her after that. I feel like there were some question marks with Michael’s whole story though, and the fact that his work just conveniently happened to send him to Oskarshamn after he’d just seen Amie on TV. Maybe I’m missing something here, but how did he know Amie had gone back to Oskarshamn if he saw her living as a pop star in Stockholm? Was this information about Amie quitting the tour and going back to her hometown even online? If Elias (who actually witnessed Amie saying she was done and quitting) seemed taken aback when he saw Amie in Oskarshamn, then how did Michael know?

I do think Michael will return for season 4 though, so hopefully this storyline will be straightened out a little. We don't really know what Michael has been up for the past few years and if he has a family of his own. Maybe he'll contact Amie again to tell her she has some younger half-siblings?

They ended on sour terms, but if Michael does have his own family it's something Amie deserves to know and she can decide whatever she wants to do. I'd also like to see a Michael/Petra reunion, but I'm getting a little ahead of myself.

This storyline wasn't bad, and I do appreciate we got to find out what the situation with Amie's dad was. I also liked how I was able to sympathize with Michael. He's not entirely awful, even if he did put a lot of blame on Petra. It's one of those situations where you don't really know what it's like to be in Michael's position unless you've experienced it, and it's very realistic.

Plot holes

Some of the plot holes of season 3 that I've already mentioned are how Jack waited a whole year before leaking the Kroon family's secrets and how Michael conveniently knew Amie was in Oskarshamn when nobody seemed to know she was coming except her mom.

I actually don't mind that it was never explained how Michael got Amie's phone number either, because that's usually pretty easy to find with a Google search. Things like addresses, economic status, and even your criminal history are easily accessible in Sweden when googling someone's name. So finding someone's phone number is probably fairly easy as well.

On the other hand, one of the most glaring plot holes appeared in 3x08. In this episode entitled Lost, the Kroon family is frantically searching for Felicia who has gone missing. Leila and Elias knock on Petra's door to see if Amie is there and might know something about Felicia's whereabouts. Petra tells them Amie isn't there and they leave.

Someone left me an anonymous ask which I answered in this post, pointing out how it was strange that Elias didn't just call Amie to ask her when she wasn't at home. We know Elias has her number because they've been talking on the phone and texting each other several times before in the season.

In 3x08, when Elias and his mom go to Amie's house and ask Petra if Amie has seen or spoken to Felicia or whether she's home, I couldn't help but wonder, uh Elias why not just call Amie and ask her if she has seen or spoken to Felicia? [...] if Elias had called her and she heard how frightened him and his family were and police being involved she would have told him and then there would be no point in the 3x09 episode really.

This is a very strong point. You could argue that maybe Elias just didn't think of that but if they went out of their way to visit Amie's house only to not find her there, it would seem like calling her instead would just be a logical next step in the situation? Here's what I wrote in response to this ask.

This is an issue I had with 3x08 and 3x09 as well. I had a hard time actually enjoying the moment between Felicia, Klara, and Amie knowing that her family was getting increasingly worried for her and even thought for a short moment that Felicia was lying dead at the bottom of the ocean. All that could’ve been avoided. To add, it didn’t make a lot of sense to me that when Klara finally decided to call someone she called Amie instead of Elias. An ex-friend of Felicia’s instead of her brother who could’ve helped a lot more. What was Amie supposed to do when she showed up at the hotel, exactly? I know there was the thing with Klara only knowing Amie’s number off the top of her head, but there is no reason why she couldn’t have gone down to the reception while Felicia was sleeping and asked to use a computer just to get a quick message to Elias. Like, “hey, Felicia attempted something bad but she’s safe with me, we’re at this hotel in this room but she didn’t want me to call anybody, I don’t know what to do”. That would’ve been so much better than keeping quiet about the situation for nearly 24 hours. I know that Klara probably has trauma from leaving her dad at the hospital after his suicide attempt and that she probably didn’t want to go against Felicia’s wishes. I understand the first part 100%. But Felicia was in a very bad place emotionally and was thinking that her whole family hated her when that wasn’t the case. I feel like in a situation like that you kind of have to be the bad guy just to ensure the family that Felicia was safe. Even if everything turned out alright in the end, it could’ve gone so much worse if Felicia had wanted to be kept hidden for longer. [...] Elias calling Amie would’ve been an easy solution to this whole debacle but we would’ve lost the drama. It’s still somewhat of a plot hole though, like you said.

I understand it was done this way for dramatic effect, but that doesn't really patch up the plot hole.

I also found it strange how many people turned on Felicia after Jack ruined her reputation in the press. I talked about this in an ask I received.

I don’t understand why the public turned on Felicia so harshly. And Leila too, for that matter. The way Jack told the story about how these two women had things done to them should indicate that they’re not the ones to be blamed. If I read this article and found out an 18-year-old girl got pregnant by a “violent criminal” who forced her to abort and then abused her I would not be angry with the girl. I would be angry that she was physically abused and also outed on her sexuality for being bi. If I read this article and found out Leila had been cheated on by her husband repeatedly with her best friends, I wouldn’t be angry at her. I would not agree with the decision to turn to alcohol (same as Felicia turning to drugs), but I wouldn’t blame them. And I feel like a lot of people should’ve been on Leila’s side after finding out the reason why they divorced. I don’t understand why people are saying they’re disappointed in Felicia and calling her fake when she’s been through so much trauma in her life. I feel like if this actually happened in real life, all the blame would be shifted to the men because they’re the ones who—in this story—are painted as the bad guys (with the exception of Jack, considering he was anonymous).

I got another anonymous ask sent in after this, pointing out how the anger directed towards Felicia was considerably more about her drug use rather than the abuse she endured. Here was my response to that:

[...] the drug use should’ve been understandable considering the stuff Felicia had been through was also written in that article. I don’t know. I can understand people unfollowing her if they didn’t want their young children to be exposed to all the controversy, but it’s still strange that everything Felicia received was hate messages. Did everybody just skip over the part where the anonymous source stated that Felicia was violently forced to have an abortion by an ex-criminal and probably did so out of fear for her life? Yes, we know this is fake, but why didn’t anybody seem to mention this? [...] they seem to have written this storyline with the idea in mind that the public was against the whole Kroon family. Felicia got comments such as “So fucking disappointed in you and your family”, “What a nasty fucking family”, “You and your family are so fucking disgusting”. So I think Leila received plenty of hate for drinking instead of divorcing her husband sooner and basically turning a blind eye to all the problems her family went through. That’s what Jack told the press, at least. The anger seemed to be directed towards every member of the Kroon family and that didn’t make a lot of sense to me.

Again, this is something the writers did to dramatize the situation and they kind of forgot to consider that what Jack actually told the journalist wasn't as incriminating for Felicia and Leila as it were for Mats and Elias.

The magic of season 3

What season 3 really excelled in, to me, was delving into some more serious topics as well as showing the gradual development of Amie and Elias' relationship. Amie and Elias are the prime example of how a slow burn is so much better than having a couple get together too fast, like Felicia and Ludde did back in season 1.

While season 3 was still airing, I wrote a post dedicated to questions I had received about Elias and Amie. Here's one of the things I said about them:

I think Elias’ interest in her really started to grow after he saw how caring Amie was to Felicia, and later on connecting with her on how they both ended up back in Oskarshamn after following their dreams which didn’t exactly turn out the way they expected. Yes, Elias has always sort of been watching and admiring Amie from afar, but that interest didn’t start growing until he actually got to know her. The experiences they had in the US and Stockholm, respectively, probably changed their mindsets and in my opinion it makes so much more sense for them to get together now than it would’ve in season 1 or season 2.

I still believe that Elias and Amie are the best-written couple of the whole show (at least so far), because they just make sense. We'll see what season 4 has in store for them because we have yet to actually see them in a romantic relationship, but I feel like their personalities and characters just fit together really well.

Another thing I really appreciated was the depiction of Felicia and Ludde's declining relationship. Things like that happen so easily, and I liked how we see Felicia do this huge gesture of planning a picnic for Ludde in 3x04 but there were still underlying problems between them. It's like that in real life too—no matter how big of a romantic gesture you make, communication will always be the number one priority in any relationship and that's where Felicia and Ludde fall short.

The obvious disconnect between them when it comes to money is also important. It's been like this from the beginning, but season 3 gave us an actual conversation about it.

Felicia: Please, I can’t talk about this. Seriously. It was stupid of me to bring this up from the beginning. Fuck, I get such anxiety talking about the future— Ludde: You get anxiety? I’m the one walking around with no money in my account. Mom and dad had to get a loan to pay off mine and Andreas’ fines. I’m playing on a shitty old synth, and living off you like some leech. That’s anxiety. Felicia: Everything isn’t about money. Ludde: Says the one who has money. Felicia: Move out then, if it’s so fucking hard to feel like a leech.

This felt very realistic. Of course a person like Felicia wouldn't think money is everything when she's never experienced financial issues. She's able to move out into her own one-bedroom apartment as soon as she's turned 18, it seems, and doesn't worry at all about the cost of furnishing and decorating it. She didn't even pay for it herself, because Mats mentions he's the one on the mortgage loan. It seems like Felicia has never had an actual job either, and that's starting to worry her because she has no idea what she should be doing.

Felicia: [...] I don’t know what I’ll be or what I’ll do in the future. I don’t know that. Ludde: You’re still an influencer— Felicia: Don’t say I’m an influencer, please. Do you think I want to be that my whole life? It’s not even a career. I'm— I’m graduating next year, and I… My grades suck, and— I have no plan. I only have you. Not like that—I have you. That’s what I have. I want to be here, in Oskarshamn. I don’t want to go to the US and chase some dream and be a hockey wife. That’s not a life. Sometimes I wish neither of us had a plan, just us together here.

Felicia's character finally offers something interesting here, which I've waited for since season 1. She's not just a party girl anymore who has issues with drugs. She's a privileged teenager who is co-dependent on the guys she meets and who has anxiety about the future, to the point where she wishes she could stay in Oskarshamn in her little apartment forever stuck in limbo.

She has to face a harsh reality when Ludde decides to break up with her, and later on when her name is slandered in the press and people all over the country are sending her hate messages. Her own family is furious with her and Felicia has nobody. She's pushed away a lot of people and her mental state is just crumbling in front of our eyes.

It's a strong storyline and actually very well executed. Almost everything gets taken away from her, and at the end of 3x07 you can almost feel what Felicia is feeling. We've been with her through this whole journey, almost, and we understand why she feels like suicide is the only answer.

It's tough to watch that final scene of 3x07. It's greatly amplified by Alva Bratt's superb acting, but the writing of the journey there is also amazing. It's very difficult to write a sensitive storyline like this.

Overall, I don't have a lot of critique towards season 3. I loved most of the episodes. I elaborated on this further in a separate post:

[Episodes 3x04 and 3x05] showcased what Eagles should be all about so well, which is relationships plus the struggles you go through as a teenager in a small town, and then of course hockey. The hockey game episodes are really good, even if I don’t think 3x05 topped 2x05 (the game where Ludde got tackled and knocked out). I loved the contrast in Date night of the budding relationship between Elias and Amie and then that fight between Felicia and Ludde on the cliff. [...] It was interesting to see how this sweet gesture from Felicia turned into a fight between the two of them. I thought that was very realistic, because no matter how big of a gesture Felicia made to apologize there were still underlying problems that they needed to talk about. I also loved the “non-date” between Elias and Amie in this episode. It was cute to see them goofing off before the movie started and then talking about it on the way home. I liked how Elias could connect to her on how they had both returned to Oskarshamn. The recent episodes that dropped last week (3x08 and 3x09) were very strong and discussed some important subject matters [...] They were dark, but not necessarily bad because they needed to happen. However, I have to say that I prefer Eagles when it’s about hockey and teenage relationships. 3x04 and 3x05 made me kind of nostalgic for season 1 and I liked the vibe they both had.

Eagles season 3 is in my opinion the best season of the show so far, and we haven't seen any signs suggesting that there is any reason for season 4 to not be even better.

Season 4: Hopes and wishes

Considering how each season has been increasing in quality bit by bit, I have pretty high hopes for the writing in season 4. I'm excited to see how the transition from teenager to young adult will be portrayed in the main characters, and what their future will hold for them after they've graduated.

My main questions are if Felicia and Ludde will find their way back to each other or if they'll remain broken up (that would be realistic as well), if Klara will reconcile with her mom, what's in store for Elias's hockey career, and if Amie will leave her label and maybe opt for something more independent.

I also want to see how Felicia deals with the new home she's checked in to, and if Ludde will in fact go to the school now that it seems Andreas will be getting into trouble again.

Amie and Klara are kind of wild cards here, because it somewhat feels like they've already reached their happy endings. Amie is famous and successful in her pop music career, and Klara has found her place as a businesswoman following in her father's footsteps. Maybe these developments should've come in season 4 instead of rushing them.

Nonetheless, I have faith in the writers. The writing suffered a little in seasons 1 and 2 but it has gotten better. Most of the things I pointed out about season 3 were just small details in an otherwise stellar season.

In conclusion...

This post was critical, but I tend to be critical of every show I watch. Eagles is still a very special show for me and having grown up in a Swedish small town myself I'm very fond of the show and its characters.

So huge thanks to the creator, Stefan H. Lindén, for making this show a reality and also to the director Carl-Petter Montell for contributing to the writing in season 3. And of course the writers of the show which include Michaela Hamilton, Fanny Ekstrand, and Anton Nyberg (plus Amanda Adolfsson who helped write 1x02 and 1x05 and Simon Ekbäck Nordström who is credited for helping with the hockey scenes in 3x05).

I hope you guys enjoyed this long, long post and major kudos to you if you read this far!

#eagles svt #svt eagles #eaglesspoilers #young royals #beartown #björnstad #been working on this post for a few days so i really hope you enjoy it!

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teledild0nix · 3 years

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Fic Writer Questions! (you can find me here on AO3 if you're interested!)

tagged by dear @theburialofstrawberries mwah!

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

112 yowza!

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

750,421 kinda tempted to go delete one word so it can be 750420 which is a far more Pleasing number

3) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

12ish but some of them overlap: BBCS/Sherlock Holmes/ACD (these are all different bc my bbcs fics are not the same as my own modern fem Sherlock Holmes adaptation are not the same as my ACD Holmes fic; Good Omens; Harry Potter/The Werewolf Draco Malfoy Cinematic Universe; Captive Prince; The Hobbit; Fleabag (it was a crossover with BBCS but Fleabag is the perspective character so it still counts as a separate fandom imo); Doctor Who; The Office; Parks and Rec; Broad City (one a piece for those last 5 but I AM going to write a Parks and Rec polycule fic for @gaykagome)

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

They're all Good Omens fics from the 2019 Summer of Good Omens! Susceptible to Summer, Fragments Shored Against My Ruin, Something So Magic, Enter Serpent, and Anything We Like

All of those have over 2k except the last one, but average engagement for me is like 400 kudos or so

5) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I try! It depends on what's going on with me. Sometimes I just don't have the energy, and I figure people would rather I spend my brain power on writing new fics than on writing replies to comments. Wish I had a fave button tho so I could let people know I read and reread comments, because I do!

6) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Oh I wrote this ficlet series called A Chemical Defect about John and Sherlock's relationship in s3 of BBCS, and it's WILDLY unpopular. People don't read my fic to cry sad tears I guess! John and Sherlock are having an affair in the story, and it ends with the implication that their relationship is unsustainable and that Mary knows about it anyway. I intended to come back to it after s4 and write a more optimistic ending but LOL! Didn't have the heart.

7) What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

I know this answer is kinda up my own ass, but like. I think stories that feel true to life sort of feel like they end on a beginning if you know what I mean? You don't really consider a chapter of your life closed until you look back on it from the next? SO that said, I think I'd have to say that it's my big BBCS serial The Only One in the World. I spent 2 years writing it, and it ends with John retiring from medicine to solve crimes and write books full time.

Could also be my WDMCU (werewolf Draco Malfoy cinematic universe) series Moonrise, which starts with Draco isolated in his abusive mother's house, trying to cope with lycanthropy essentially alone and ends with him in love and surrounded by found family in a cozy cottage in Hogsmeade, having gotten some lycanthrope rights legislation passed after working at it for years and talking to Harry about whether they want to have kids. Oh man I feel warm and fuzzy just thinking about it

8) Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I have written one crossover. It's BBCS/Fleabag, because me and @loudest-subtext-in-tv were laughing about how John seems like one of the horrible guys Fleabag sleeps with basically out of self loathing, so I wrote this fic to make Nattie laugh, and you should read it bc it's so good and so underrated.

9) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not really, but people don't seem to know that authors can read bookmark tags unless you private the bookmark, and someone once put in the bookmark tag on one of my fics 'writing was meh but it was okay.' Okay so why bookmark it then??

10) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Fuck yes! I'm not sure what 'what kind?' means? People fucking? Sloppy, silly, and awkward, with lots of laughing. I also really like writing afterglow scenes which are even sillier and gigglier and often involve one character cooking for another. Food as love language is a very distinct pattern of mine tbh

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of, but occasionally I'll write a post on here where I make some elaborate head canon, and I'll see people in the tags talking about how they want to write fic of it, and it makes me breathe fire out of my nose like a dragon like PLEASE DON'T. The WDMCU came out of a ficlet post I made on here like a year before I actually wrote the 60k series so like!!! Please don't do that!

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! To Russian and I believe Chinese. Not my entire oeuvre but a handful of BBCS and Good Omens fics

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but I wrote a fic inspired by an RP I did with my gf right around when we met (actually now that I think about it, it's two fics), and I waaaaaaanna do a WDMCU collab with my beloved Sally @clytemenestras at some point if he has time bc he inspired me to even write werewolf draco with his original lesbian werewolf story

14) What’s your all time favorite ship?

favorites are hard for me? I always think I'm currently doing my best writing lol so I'll say drarry

15) What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

I don't post fics unless theyre finished, so I don't have any WIP up on AO3, but I did intend to continue with my fem Sherlock Holmes series, Your Many Tendencies. I just haven't been in a Holmes mood for a long time. Maybe I'll come back to it idk. This particular series is honestly very unpopular? People will just straight up say they don't read femslash, and it hurts a lot. This series feels really personal too, bc it's about a Black autistic nonbinary lesbian, so it does hurt my feelings that no one seems to care, yknow? I mean the people who read it are extremely kind and thoughtful in their engagement with it, but it has vastly less engagement than my m/m fic, and that's painful. It gets literally 1/10 the attention my fics usually get.

16) What are your writing strengths?

Almost all of my writing is romance, but I tend to write concurrently about recovery and found family, and I think I'm very good at doing that in a way that connects with my audience. I once had someone ask if they could use my words in their wedding vows, and I've had people tell me they started doing things with their spouse that my characters do with their partners in order to express love. I think about that all the time. My Impact. It makes me feel like I have a real duty to my audience yknow?

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

This question is hard for me like I've been writing so long and so much that I'm literally always happy with my final draft! It's always exactly to my taste, yknow? I suppose I could say that my fics tend not to be terribly plotty but so WHAT? That's beside the fuckn point for me. Plot who? I don't know Her. Also honestly like. Stories feel more True to me when they aren't ruthlessly devoted to plot bc like life isn't like that yknow?

18) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

If you're not fluent in that language, get a beta who is!!!!! That said, I have written scraps of very simple dialogue in French using mostly Google Translate (sometimes I check w Sally bc he speaks French but I am usually too impatient), and I am perfectly well aware that I take my life in my hands each time!!! Also don't do that bullshit thing where it's in italics? That shit is weird and exoticizing. Just write it in quotation marks like normal dialogue.

19) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

BBCS babey back in 2012. Ended a 5 year dry spell for me after I got my writing degree.

20) What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Hmmmm I think it's probably gonna be the fic I'm working on now that I haven't posted yet, but I know it's called Names for a House, and here's a tiny bit of it

Thanks again Shreya for asking me to do this bc I really love talking about myself. I tag @the-moon-loves-the-sea, @clytemenestras, @tomiano, @gaykagome and @totallysilvergirl

No pressure <3

#sherlock stuff #ask games #apliddell #if y'all wanna send me asks about names for a house #or anything else i mentioned here #they would be welcome

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lost-in-the-80s · 3 years

Text

You Don’t Want My Love - Chapter 3

Pairing: Duff McKagan x reader

Words: 3,786k

Summary: Guns n Roses hires a new tour assistant, but nobody thought that Duff would fall for her.

In this chapter: Erin’s arrival on the tour turns the band upside down. Y/N hadn’t realized how much she needed a friend until she had her to talk to. Y/N and Slash go to an arcade.

A/N: 1- I was struggling with this chapter, so sorry if it’s shitty.

2- I was thinking about making a playlist inspired by this fic, do you guys want it? If so, let me know!

3- Also, reminding you that I’m posting a new chapter every Tuesday.

Tag list: @roger-taylors-car @ladieswttda @teasid @metalheartofgold @slashscowboyboots @ginny-rose-sixx @rumoured-whispers @vinylvintage add yourself to my tag list :)

Previous chapter | Next Chapter

After Tom’s departure Y/N couldn’t avoid feeling a little lost, she’d grown used to him instructing her and she missed his participation at the silent book club. It wasn’t a club though, just the two of them, sitting backstage reading without saying anything.

The only good part about Tom leaving was that she finally got his bunk. It felt weird during the first night, to sleep somewhere that wasn’t the couch, but as soon as she fell asleep her body got used to it.

Duff was on the bunk on top of hers, as she was a light sleeper she would hear him mumbling some things while he was sleeping. He moved a lot also, which would usually wake her up, but she didn’t really mind.

It had been a week since Tom left and the things with the boys were starting to get back to normal. Duff helped her get more along with them, inviting her to play cards with the boys one night and asking about her opinion in random conversations, just so she could participate.

The two of them had grown quite close during this week, he was a nice guy, she could tell that. He always asked her to join them wherever they were going and even helped her with some of her duties when he had some free time.

And that was quite the problem. She liked his company, he was easy to talk to, and when there wasn’t a subject he would ask for her opinion on the books she was reading. He was a sweet boy. Too sweet to say the truth, and she was starting to want to be around him. But she shouldn’t.

Duff was from a completely different world, the two of them were complete opposites and the only reason why he was spending time with her was because he had no one else to. She knew that as soon as the tour ended she wouldn’t ever see him again, so she didn’t want to become too close to him.

She and Steven were back to normal, he never acted like that again and Izzy, well, Izzy was a hard person to read, he had never been rude to her, but they didn’t really talk. She didn’t take that personally though, he didn’t really talk to anyone.

Things with Axl remained the same, he hadn’t talked to her for eight days and counting, sometimes, she would laugh at one of Duff’s jokes and he would give her a death glare, but she tried to ignore.

Slash was another story. She talked to him, but just the necessary, she was still upset about what had happened during the party and expected him to apologize, but as the days passed, the less probable it got for him to do so.

In that morning, she woke up before the boys, and after doing her routine and checking up her agenda she realized that they would reach the next city around ten in the morning.

Talking to the bus driver, he informed her that they would stop for breakfast in thirty minutes, which allowed her to do her favorite part of the job.

Getting inside the bedroom area she turned on the lights while saying loud enough for all of them to hear.

“Good morning, princesses! It’s 7 in the morning and we’ll make a stop for breakfast in thirty, so move your asses out of the bed and get ready!”

Leaning against the wall opening, she saw Axl exiting his bunk, his hair was a mess as he slowly walked towards the bathroom while rubbing his eyes.

The second to wake up was Steven, just like her, he was a morning person. He got up quickly, putting a white tank top on before giving her a huge smile. “Good morning, Y/N!”

“Good morning, Steve!” She smiled back.

As soon as Axl left the bathroom and Steven got in, Izzy plopped on the ground beside her, he was dressed in just his underwear, which made her look in the opposite direction. However, she did notice the dark circles underneath his eyes and the remains of the hickeys Cheryl had left on his chest.

Cheryl had decided to accompany another band last Saturday, hugging Y/N tightly and telling her to call when she opened her boutique before leaving.

As per usual, Slash and Duff didn’t get up.

Getting close to Slash’s bunk she touched his shoulder slightly. “Slash! wake up!”

He mumbled in response and so she moved to Duff’s.

“Duff, time to get up!” Her head was at his bunk’s level.

He moved slightly before opening his eyes, focusing directly on hers. A small smile appeared on his face.

“Good morning, Y/N.” His voice was husky due to his sleepiness and for an odd reason, her heart started beating twice as fast.

“Good morning, Duff.” She smiled sweetly before walking out of the room.

Sitting on the couch, she grabbed a Vogue magazine and waited until the boys got ready. As the minutes passed by, all of them joined her in the living room, except for Axl, who was, as always, late.

When the bus came to a stop and they got up to exit Axl finally showed up, she, Axl and Duff were the only remaining people on the bus and she stopped to let him go first, he was already hating her, she didn’t want to give him one more reason to.

“You can go first!” He gestured with his hand for her to pass.

She looked at him waiting to see if he was being sarcastic, but the smile on his face told her that he was in a good mood. Strange, she thought while she exited the bus.

The bright morning sun hit her skin and she stopped for a while, allowing the warm feeling to take a hold of her. Starting to feel as if someone was watching her, she turned around, finding Duff walking slowly towards the snack bar.

“He spends eight days without talking to me and then he suddenly decides he’s ok with my presence!” She scoffed while joining Duff.

“Erin is coming, so he’s in a good mood.” He looked down at her.

“Who’s Erin?”

“His girlfriend.” He opened the door for her to get in first.

“But he was hitting on me when I arrived.” She frowned.

“Oh, that! He was only joking that night.” Duff smiled at her, letting a small chuckle escape.

She and Duff sat beside Steven, in front of Axl and Izzy, Slash being to her right.

When the waitress arrived, she started making the orders, a month with them had been enough time for her to know that they had certain habits.

Izzy would always ask for a black coffee and a pack of cigarettes in the morning, while Steven would ask for pancakes. Slash and Axl liked scrambled eggs with coffee and Duff would usually eat pancakes with Steven.

After asking for the food, she took a pack of cigarettes out of her purse, giving it to Izzy.

“Thank you!” He smiled at her. “You know, I didn’t expect much from you Y/N, but your efficiency is something to be recognized!”

The compliment made her smile. “Thanks.”

As soon as the food arrived they started eating while making small talk.

“These scrambled eggs remind me of my grandma ones!” Sash smiled, “You guys wanna try it?” He extended the plate for the rest of them.

Steven got some for himself, while Izzy simply shook his head.

“Want some, Y/N?”

“No, Thank you.” She replied while looking at her plate.

She didn’t see Slash frowning when he looked at Izzy as if asking if he had done something wrong, to which he shrugged.

---

Back at the bus, she focused on her reading while Steven put some cartoons on the TV.

Sitting in front of her, Slash spoke up.

"Did I do something you didn't like, Y/N?"

She stared at him for a couple of seconds. How could he not remember? She thought.

Taking a deep breath, she closed the magazine. "Actually, you did."

He stopped for a second as if he was trying to remember. "What was it?"

"You seriously don't remember?"

He scratched the back of his neck. "...No?"

They all started to stare at the two of them. Even Axl, who was expecting to see a fight. He had seen what had happened that night, but he thought Slash remembered.

"You tried to kiss me that night at the party."

"Wha-... Whe-... Oh shit, was that you?"

She nodded as a response.

Axl and Steven started laughing, Slash's face was full of confusion and embarrassment.

"Wait! She's the hot chick who you were complaining about?" Duff interjected, making fake quotation marks with his fingers.

Slash's face got hot and he thanked that his hair covered most of it.

The boys started laughing harder, even Izzy joined them.

"Oh shit! I'm so sorry, Y/N! I swear I didn't recognize you, I wouldn't ever have done that to you!" He rubbed his forehead and his embarrassment was enough to make Y/N realize that he was telling the truth.

"I'm so so sorry!"

"It's ok, just don't make it happen again!" She pointed a finger at him.

"Sure, sure! You have my word!"

---

After two more hours on the bus, they finally arrived at the hotel. They were in New York, and their hotel was huge, the lobby itself making Y/N's last apartment look like a shoebox.

She walked towards the receptionist and stopped in her tracks when she heard a high pitched scream. Turning around she saw a girl with reddish-brown hair running towards Axl, who embraced her tightly.

She was wearing white denim pants and a black tank top and seemed to be taller than Y/N. Brushing it off she went back to work, making the boys’ check-in. But she couldn't deny that she found the scene cute.

When she was giving the boys their keys, Axl stopped her to make presentations.

"Erin, this is Y/N, our assistant. Y/N, this is my beautiful girlfriend Erin." He was smiling again.

She looked at the girl, finding her smiling while extending her hand towards Y/N, who shook it, smiling a little.

"Nice to meet you!"

"I'm glad I'll have some female company around here!" Erin said, smiling harder.

If she smiles more, her cheeks will start aching. Y/N thought to herself.

"What do we have for today, Y/N?" Axl asked.

"Soundcheck at 2, interview at the arena at 4:30 and the Gig at 7."

"Sorry, doll, I won't be able to go with you." He turned towards Erin.

"But you promised me we would go shopping in New York!"

"I can't, babe, I’m sorry."

She looked around and a smile appeared on her lips.

"Can I take Y/N with me then?"

Y/N looked up from her agenda. "Me?" Her eyes slightly widened.

"What if we need her?" Axl said.

"Let the girl go, we can survive without her for a day!" Izzy said, patting Y/N's shoulder before heading to the elevator.

"Do you wanna go, Y/N?" Axl asked.

"I could use some shopping." She smiled.

Erin made a happy sound before hugging her. "We're gonna be best friends!!"

The action made Y/N laugh while hugging her back.

She was going shopping? In New York? She couldn’t believe it!

Once in her room, she took her time making a quick happy dance before quickly changing her clothes for a pink dress and some white high-heels, finalizing her outfit with some sunglasses.

Getting at the lobby, Erin intertwined her arm with hers and so the two of them got in a taxi and drove towards downtown.

The girls entered a store, starting to try clothes.

“What do you think?” Y/N asked, showing Erin a short black skirt.

“Wow! You look fierce!”

Y/N smiled, turning around to look at herself in the mirror again.

“But it’s a little bit short on you, sweetie, if you want I can get you a bigger size.” The saleswoman said while looking Y/N up and down.

Y/N checked the skirt in the mirror again, it was definitely short, but she liked it.

“Who cares if it’s short?” She asked, shrugging.

“If I was into girls, I’d definitely bang you!” Erin said laughing.

The woman’s eyes widened while she turned around leaving the two alone.

“I hate it when they keep giving opinions.”

“Uhh, me too!” Erin rolled her eyes. “Are you hungry? ‘cause I feel like my stomach is going to eat me!”

Y/N laughed. “I am!”

“Let’s go eat something then! it’s already 4 pm.”

“Really? Wow, time flew!”

Getting near the store cashier Y/N started to get worried, she had picked lots of clothes by impulse and now she was worried that she wouldn’t be able to pay for all of this.

“Should I charge everything together or separately?” The woman asked when they put the clothes on the counter.

“Se-” Before she could finish, Erin interrupted.

“All together!” She handed her the credit card.

Erin looked at Y/N and saw the confused expression on her face.

“Axl gave me the band’s card, he said I should pay for your clothes since you keep up with him every day.” She giggled slightly.

“So turns out he’s not that much of an asshole!” Y/N smirked.

Erin nudged her. “He’s not an asshole, he’s just…. just…”

“Temperamental?” Y/N laughed.

“Sensitive!” Erin replied, but laughed along.

After getting their bags, the girls walked side to side towards a beautiful café, where they ordered cake and tea, sitting at a table on the sidewalk.

“So, where are you from, Y/N?” Erin asked when they finished eating.

“North Dakota”

“Wow, and how did you end in LA?”

“I got a scholarship at UCLA.”

“Really? That’s awesome! And what course did you take?”

“Fashion. I wanted to be a fashion designer.”

“Oh, that explains a lot.” She mumbled before taking a sip of her tea.

“What do you mean?” Y/N leaned against her chair.

“Nothing, it’s just that, the boys get the feeling that you don’t like working here.”

Y/N frowned, but Erin kept talking before she could say anything.

“It’s like, you’re efficient, and you do the job perfectly, but you don’t seem to be enjoying yourself, it’s almost as if it was an obligation for you.”

Y/N stopped to think. “It’s just that, I had so many dreams, and none of them happened, and I’m feeling frustrated you know? I wanted to accomplish many things, but life hit me with a bus.” She looked to her plate, sadness overtaking her.

“Hey, I get that! Sometimes things don’t go as planned.” Erin touched her hand, offering her a warm smile. “But try to see this by the bright side. Like, what are your biggest dreams?”

Taking a deep breath, she drank the remaining of her tea before answering. “I wanted to open my own boutique and I wanted to travel the world”

“Why are you saying I wanted? You can still do these things!” Getting closer to Y/N she moved the flowers in the center of the table away, trying to see her better. “You want a boutique right? If you use the money you get with the tour to invest, in three years you’ll have enough money to open it. My dad works with the stock exchange, I can ask him to give you some tips!”

“Really? Would you do that?”

“Sure!! And you said you wanted to travel the world, girl, what are you doing right now? Look around, you’re in New York, in a few months the boys will go to Europe, you are traveling the world.”

Wow. Y/N had never realized it. She was indeed living one of her dreams.

“I know that this wasn’t your dream job and that it must be really annoying to deal with the boys and stay for so long in that bus, but at least you’re not dealing with paperwork behind a desk.”

A smile started to form on Y/N’s lips. Erin was right, this was way better than paperwork. She could go to parties, dress whatever she wanted, stay at the best hotels and to be honest, she kind of liked being around the boys.

“Yeah! You’re right, Erin! This is not so bad!”

Erin nodded excitedly while drinking the rest of her tea.

“I think we should go back.” Y/N informed while checking the time on her wristwatch.

“Really? Can’t we stay for more? I wanted to go to more stores.” She pouted.

“I’m afraid not. Your boyfriend will freak out if nobody gets him his damn towels.” Y/N rolled her eyes, but giggled a little. “Speaking of it. What does he do with so many?”

Erin raised her hands in defense. “I have no idea.” She whispered while shaking her head.

---

The rest of the day went on by fine, Y/N helped the boys before and after the gig and collapsed on her bed when they got back to the hotel. So many hours walking in heels granted her a long and deep night of sleep.

She couldn’t avoid letting a small satisfied moan to escape from her lips when she got comfortable in bed. It’s so good to lay in a bed that doesn’t shake with the road. She thought, before falling asleep.

The next morning, Y/N woke up with her bedroom’s phone ringing.

“Yes?” Her voice was grog and she barely could open her eyes.

“Y/N, I want to ask for breakfast, but I don’t know how to use the hotel’s phone.” Steven’s voice filled her ears, he seemed to be hopeless.

She frowned while rubbing her eyes. “But, how did you call me then?”

He paused for a minute. “With the… phone…”

She laughed. “Hang the phone and then press 0, the receptionist will answer you.”

“Oh, ok. Thanks, Y/N!”

“It’s no problem, Steve.” She hanged the phone, laughing again.

Stretching up she saw it was 11 in the morning already. “Looks like I’ll have brunch!” She smiled, she loved brunch.

After taking a shower and putting on a pair of jeans with a red blouse, she left her room, asking for the receptionist where she could find a good restaurant nearby.

---

It was 6 o’clock now. She was in her room reading, her legs rested on the bed’s headboard while she laid upside down. A knock on her door took her away from the romance she was currently addicted to.

Opening the door she found Slash leaning against her door frame.

“What are you up to?” He asked casually.

“Just reading.” She pointed towards the book with her thumb.

“Put a jacket, let’s go out!”

“What? To where?”

“There’s an arcade nearby.” He put his hands in his pant’s front pockets.

“Hmm, I don’t know…”

“Come on, everybody is out for dinner, we’re the only ones who stayed.”

Her lips turned into a thin line as she tried to think.

“Come on, it’s gonna be fun! You can read some other time!”

“Fine! Give me 5 minutes!” She closed the door on his face, before rushing to find her new denim jacket she had bought the day before.

Applying some mascara and a nude lipstick she got her purse and exited the room.

When they got on the street, Slash spoke up.

“Once again, I’m sorry about the party! It won’t happen again!”

“It’s ok!” She assured him with a small smile.

Entering the arcade a red light covered their skins, Tears for Fears played in the background and she smiled, she loved them.

“What do you wanna do first?” Slash asked after they got the tickets.

She shrugged. “I don’t know, it’s my first time!”

“Oh, so you’re having your first time with me?” He tried to smirk, but ended laughing.

She playfully slapped his arm while laughing. “Idiot!”

“Ok, pinball it is!” He yelled.

Slash taught her how to play and started complaining when her punctuation became bigger than his. “This is not possible! You’ve played it before!”

“I haven't, I swear!” She put her hand at her heart.

They went on with the night, playing many different games. When they passed by Dance Dance Revolution she stopped in her tracks.

“Oh my gosh! Let’s do this one! Please!”

“What? No way!” He started walking towards another game.

“Come on, you’re owing me after the party!”

“I’m disappointed you’re this type of person, Y/N.” He touched his chest, pretending that she had hurt him.

“Please!” She laughed at his drama.

“Ok, but I’m just watching, no way I’ll play this.”

She shrugged. “As long as you hold my purse!”

Choosing Walking On Sunshine by Katrina & The Waves she started dancing, stepping on the lights with mastery.

Her heart filled with happiness, she loved to dance, and she missed doing it more often.

“Wow! Great score!” Slash congratulated her when stepped out of the game.

“Thanks.”

He was leaning against another game table, looking into her purse, her small mirror was in one of his hands. “How do you manage to put so many things here?”

She got the mirror from his hand along with her purse, while shaking her head at him.

“You lied.”

“Me!?” She scoffed.

“You said you had never been to an arcade, but you destroyed that game!”

“It’s the truth. I had never played that.” They started walking towards the exit.

“How did you do so good then?”

“I was a cheerleader, I know how to dance.” They stopped, getting their jackets.

“A cheerleader huh?” They entered the empty streets and Slash lit up a cigarette.

She shrugged while making a bun with her hair.

They entered the hotel and got in the elevator.

“You know, for someone who listens to ABBA, you’re nice.” He teased her while smiling.

She rolled her eyes. “For someone who wears a shirt saying ‘I’m a slut’, you’re nice.”

They laughed. The doors opened and they started walking through the corridors.

“This is my room.” She pointed stopping.

“Yeah, I know. It was nice hanging out with you!” He stopped on the other side of the corridor, in front of his door.

She nodded. “I can say the same.”

“Good night, cheerleader!” He said smiling, before entering his room and closing his door.

She rolled her eyes and entered her room. Something inside her head told her that they’d be good friends.

#harley writes #you don't want my love #duff mckagan #duff mckagan fic #duff mckagan fanfic #duff mckagan imagine #duff mckagan x reader #guns n roses #guns n roses fanfic #guns n roses fic #guns n roses imagine #guns n roses x reader #gnr #classic rock imagine

86 notes · View notes

catnipkdodo · 2 years

Text

Oi, the thing I thought escaped when I fled Wattpad. Tags!

Anyways, the rule is to post write three sentences from a WIP and post them, then tag others, of course. Three, I believe.

Tagged by @deusvervewrites

I look around at the others, making eye contact with Josh and Tina as if to ask "You hearing this too?" even though I've tuned out most of Kaikara's ranting- I mean, I'm paying attention enough to get the gist, but like, I don't want to emotionally process whatever fucked up explanation she has for leaving us to die and disobeying direct or- did she just sneak in an Anti-Huma- oh she's definitely railing against humans, and that is not what you want for someone sitting on the board of an organization whose existence is dependent on keeping magic on the down-low in a world where reg humans are the majority population.

As she finishes her stupid explanation of her ideology- the fuck does she mean far-left, not wanting innocent people to die is pretty universal as far as morals go, not even that political of an ideal- all I can think is how much I hate her, and maybe it's that magic-booster-drug-cocktail thinking for me, but as I'm staring at her stupid perfect scarless face that hasn't fought and suffered and lost the way I have I can't help but think that she was never my friend, not if she was hiding this much hate and vitriol under her hotheaded-but-friendly façade.

"Far left, huh? Oh I'll show you far left," and before she can even process her words, Kaikara is on the floor cupping her nose, and it turns out my far-left-hook is still solid, although my shoulder is a little sore with how much force I put into that.

I figured I might as well celebrate with something from a thing that started on the old orange hellsite. A Frying Pan to the Face. This bit has been in my head for like two years now, so I finally wrote the most important part of it. And like that Alphabet Story I bullshitted my way through for school, I am abused the fact that dialogue in quotation marks technically counts as one sentence if you follow it up with a tagline. Hell, I abused every grammar technicality to keep it to three sentences, because I am way too wordy for this challenge.

And that’s that on that. The bit is two chapters ahead, so god knows when it’ll get the full context behind it, although the chapter draft has been started for ~6 months. It’s the previous chapter that is the problem child.

Now, @deusvervewrites , take your goddamn tagback because you are the only person I feel socially okay with tagging for this! I have no friends! This is what i get for never reaching out!

I’m joking, I’m joking. Sort of. I’m very awkward, and I don’t interact as much as I should. I’ll get around to that someday.

#tag game #AFPTTF #this is actually a marvel fic #it's just really convoluted #and it will get more convoluted #which is almost impressive #given how nuts some of the early stuff is

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madasthesea · 4 years

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I’m sorry for being so mean. I had a really bad day and didn’t mean to say such awful things. But I am frustrated my fics always get ignored, especially by the big names in the fandom such as yourself that claim to support everyone. I’ve written so many fics in this fandom and have been doing so for over a year, yet I only have 30 subscribers. I get really frustrated and feel like I’m a bad writer because everyone ignores me and my fics. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you. I’m sorry.

(2/2) For a fan community that claims they are inclusive, everyone sure doesn’t act that way. Everyone already has their friends and people like me who don’t have many friends get ignored. The big names in the fandom don’t support or read the fics by the new people. It’s not just me. I’ve never received a single kudo or comment from you or anyone else that’s popular like you. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong but people don’t read my fics.

Ok, I’m answering this in the middle of the night in the hopes that not a lot of people will see it so it won’t become A Thing and then as soon as this fic exchange is over I am turning my anons off forever. Anon, I guess I have to give you credit for coming to apologize, but I have to say, where before I was perfectly capable of laughing off your extremely rude message, I have to say, now I’m annoyed. Because there is not a single instance or bad day or frustration that makes what you said acceptable. You came into my inbox and threw a temper tantrum because you knew my name and I happen to have anons on unlike most of the “fandom big names.” You told me I had the worst fics in the fandom, told me I publish outlines instead of stories and accused me of writing incestual pedophilia because you had a bad day? I’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you’re young because that is the only possible excuse I could give you. As I said in my original response, if I were already an anxious writer, you could have caused me to delete all of my fics and put me off of writing forever. Someone commented on your original message and said that they don’t post their writing because of messages like that one. You’re right you shouldn’t have taken it out on me, and you wouldn’t have if your name had been associated with it. But here we are, and I’m going to try to make it so this never happens again, at least with the two of us.

Now, onward to your frustrations. I am sorry that you aren’t getting the attention you want, but one) yelling at me on anon isn’t going to fix that. Two) not to be like callous and insensitive, but that happens to almost every writer I know. I’ve been writing fanfiction for 12 years. This is the seventh fandom I’ve written for and no one ever read my fics before this. My first year on AO3 I published six stories and had 500 views total. I get the frustration, but sometimes you just have to get the perfect combination of exposure, plot, and interest. Three) Do you have any idea how many stories get published in the Peter Parker & Tony Stark tag a day? I’m sorry, I can’t read all of them. I don’t want to read all of them, in fact I have 14 different tags blacklisted. Just because I am a “big name” does not mean I owe you a comment or a kudos. If I like your story, I will tell you. Chances are, I haven’t even seen one of your stories, because I’m an adult with a job and hobbies and writing of my own to do. Most of the “big names” are the exact same except a lot of them also have school. If you want someone to read your stories, ask them. Say “hey, I respect you and your opinion, could you look at this for me?” They will probably say yes unless they have a good reason not to. Don’t just sit there and wait for it to happen and get mad when it doesn’t. Also, this is the third time someone has yelled at me for not reading or commenting on their fics and it makes me less inclined to leave kudos in general in case someone comes and gets mad that I read their fic but didn’t comment. So uh… don’t do this again.

As for the community, do you want to know how to make friends? Send asks (nice ones) not on anon. We can’t interact with you if you don’t know who you are. Reblog our fics. Comment on our posts. You can’t make friends if no one knows you exist. And the only way to show you exist is show yourself in our notes, in our inboxes. Sitting in your corner of tumblr and being bitter isn’t going to help anyone. This fandom is welcoming and it is kind and it is supportive. You saw how many people came to my defense tonight. If you talk to those people, they’ll talk back, but they can’t reach out to every single Irondad blog, it just isn’t feasible.

And finally, how to get your fics read more. Like I said, part of it is just… luck. I got in at the very beginning, as did losingmymindtonight, parkrstark, several others, and had already established myself before IW came out and the fandom got bigger. Lucky break on my part, but I’m also a good writer because I’m 25 and I have a Master’s in a writing heavy field and I’ve been writing my entire life. Sometimes it just takes practice. But there is stuff that all good fics have in common, so here we go:

1) Good grammar, good spelling, good punctuation.

I don’t know who you are so I have no idea what your writing is like, but this is stuff I had to tell college students as a teacher, so I’m just going to go over it.

Are there line breaks between every paragraph? No? There need to be. It’s hard to read when all of the words are bunched together, meaning automatic exits will happen, regardless of content.

Do you start a new paragraph every single time a new person speaks? You should.

“When someone is speaking,” I asked, “do you put a comma before the speech tag?” Commas, not periods. Not periods then commas. Punctuation goes inside the quotation marks.

Are you writing in first or second person (I or you)? Don’t.

Pay attention to your tenses. It is very confusing reading a story that switches tenses every sentence.

Are you capitalizing the beginning of every sentence and proper noun? You have to. Reading all lowercase takes energy and concentration and readers don’t like to put more effort in than they’re used to. Also it’s just pointless.

Get a beta reader. Get grammarly (but the free version, don’t pay) or another editing service. Google anything you have a question about. EDIT YOUR WRITING.

2) New ideas

Every fandom has tropes they love, but not every fic can be a trope fic. Every fic I write is, if not completely new, a spin on a popular trope.

Yes, there are some popular field trip fics, but most of them get lost in the weeds because they are all the same. And most of the people I talk to don’t even like them. (This counts for May dies fics, sensory overload… If you’re going to write it, you have to make it different and you have to make it good.)

Look to other movies or books for ideas, check out irondad-fic-ideas, something. Write something new, something only you can write, and at least some people will notice.

3) Good characterization

Now apparently everything I write is OOC, so maybe I’m not the best person to be giving advice on this :/ (I’m still annoyed. I’m getting over it)

BUT–the best way to write a well-known character is to know the source material. Listen to the way they talk, watch how they move. Ignore fanon. It’s hard, but try. Peter isn’t actually a perpetual ray of sunshine, chatter box 12 year old like we often write him, Tony isn’t 100% sarcasm and incapable of recognizing his own feelings.

If you can hear the character say it in their actual voice, it’s probably a good line.

4) Misc.

Fandom rule of thumb: cute fluff and hardcore whump win out over deep character studies on convoluted plot lines. If you’re just looking for hits or maybe a fic to establish yourself, that’s a good way to do it.

If you’re posting a multi-chapter fic, don’t post it all at once. People will comment on each chapter as you post and you’ll get more hits.

Respond to comments, especially at the early stages. It makes your readers more invested, it builds friendships, and it makes your stats look better.

There’s a blog that supports little known writers in this fandom! Rec your fics there!

Make sure to never, ever put “I suck at summaries” or “fic is better than summary” it is an instant turnoff. If you can’t write the thing that makes me want to read the fic well, why would I think I want to read the fic?

Tagging on AO3 is vital. Tag the right relationships, tag the right emotions (angst, fluff, hurt/comfort). I often sort just by these. Always put in the category, (M/M, F/M, etc.) and the rating. There is no reason not to, but not doing so makes people less likely to read. Always tag triggers.

Never steal fics or ideas. If a story inspires you, you can ask the author if you can write something similar and then link in your story back to theirs. Nothing will make you less popular in a fandom than stealing work.

Lastly, I know authors constantly talk about how important comments and kudos are, and they are so important to bolstering spirits, I get that, but if you aren’t writing for yourself first, you will always be disappointed. You should enjoy your fic as much when you read it in your word doc as when you read it online with comments and kudos. And maybe you write really niche stuff that doesn’t appeal to a lot of people, but churning out carbon copies of the Fandom Tropes and hoping for hits is not going to satisfy you and you will keep being frustrated.

Let’s not do this again, shall we? Next time you have a question, ask me nicely.

#answered #it is 2:30 in the morning but I was so annoyed I couldn't sleep so here we go :)))))#Anonymous

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thebookreader12345 · 3 years

Text

Q&A Answers

Hey everyone! I’ve gathered all of your questions, and here are the answers. I hope you enjoy! You’re all welcome to comment your answers down below to some of the questions so I can learn more about you as well.

Q: What was your favorite fanfic to write? A: I’ve got two. One is Costume Party, because it was the first imagine I wrote on here. The other is The Perfect Night for Pumpkin Picking because I loved the prompt. So whoever requested it, thank you. It was a pleasure to write.

Q: Where would you like to travel? A: I’ve always wanted to travel to Greece because Percy Jackson was my whole childhood, so Greek Mythology is really interesting to me. I also think Santorini looks gorgeous, so it would be amazing to go there.

Q: What inspires you to write?/How do you get inspired to create your stories? A: Writing fanfics and imagines is basically my whole life at the moment. I’ve got school, and then right after that I hop on either this or Wattpad. I know, I’ve got no life😂. Anyways, most of my ideas come to me in a dream, and when I wake up, I write those things down. Either that happens, or I imagine different scenarios I’d like to be in with the characters. Of course, there’s also requests. Just a note that REQUESTS ARE OPEN. So, yeah. That’s basically how I get my ideas.

Q: What made you decide to write for One Chicago? A: Fun fact, I actually have One Chicago fics out on Wattpad, so if anyone wants my handle, I will gladly post it (Beware my fics on Wattpad are pretty long, and not completed yet). And sometimes, it got old following the script like I do for those fanfics because I follow the story line pretty closely so that everyone gets a real feel for being in the One Chicago universe. I also had some story ideas I wanted to write out, so I was like, hey, lets start posting on the tumblr account I have but don’t use. And here we are.

Q: What is your favorite fic trope? A: I’ve got to go with friends to lovers. I think building up a solid friendship is pretty important when writing stories, and then making that progress into two characters falling in love is just cool to write because you see how far the characters have come.

Q: Who is your favorite character from each show? A: I’m going to do favorite male and female for each show. For Chicago Med, Natalie and Will are my favorites. For Chicago Fire, it’s Kelly and Sylvie. And then for Chicago PD, it’s Hailey and Adam and Jay (I can’t choose between the two. I love them both).

Q: Who is your favorite One Chicago fic writer? A: I’ve got way too many favorites, and I don’t want to choose one over the other, but hint; if you look at who I follow then maybe you’ll see. :)

Q: How many times do you need to write an imagine? A: I’m going to take you through my process. I either come up with an imagine or take a request from my inbox, then I write out the pairing, summary, and give it a title. Next I write the full imagine, and then I read through it to see if I’ve made any spelling errors or forgot quotation marks or something like that. After that, I put in warnings, do a word count, and finally I tag it and publish it.

Q: If you could date one of the One Chicago characters, who would it be? A: I love a lot of the characters in the One Chicago universe, but I’m going to have to go with Jay. If I know Jay, then I’m probably close to Will, since they’re brothers, and then Hailey is Jay’s partner at work, so I’d probably befriend her. 3 for the price of 1.

#one chicago #chicago med #chicago pd #chicago fire #question and answer #x reader #jay halstead imagine #will halstead imagine #kelly severide imagine #connor rhodes imagine #matt casey imagine #adam ruzek imagine #jay halstead x reader #will halstead x reader #kelly severide x reader #connor rhodes x reader #matt casey x reader #adam ruzek x reader #greg gerwitz x reader

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incorrectbatfam · 4 years

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I wanna start writing fanfics (mainly birdflash) and I need tips bc it's my first time?

Please run things through a basic grammar and spell checker

Use quotation marks to indicate speech

Paragraph breaks for lines of dialogue, changes in time/place, or switching topics; nobody wants to read a single giant text block

Don’t put author’s notes in the middle, it distracts from the story

Avoid text speak unless the characters are actually texting

If possible, get someone to beta-read for feedback (I’m always happy to if you can’t find anyone else, just DM me)

Put effort into your summary. Don’t say “the summary sucks but the story is better” or “no summary because spoilers”. Your summary is how you hook people, so if readers see you’re not confident in a synopsis or you refuse to tell them what they need to know off the bat, they’re less likely to continue reading

Steer clear of slurs if you don’t know how to properly write them or if your characters aren’t in a position to say it. Fictional ones like “mudblood” don’t count

Similar thing for cussing. Use cuss words only if a) it adds value to the moment or b) if the character is a known potty mouth. Otherwise those words lose the intense effect that they’re supposed to have

Give proper ratings. Don’t rate your fanfic “general audience” if there’s graphic violence or sex or whatever. When in doubt, get a second opinion. Again, I’m open for that too

Please don’t write the entirety of a song’s lyrics in a songfic. Just the important parts will do

If you’re using foreign words, italicize them and leave definitions in the notes below. Translating them as you go seems like a good idea but breaks up the flow of the story

If you don’t know what kissing/sex/etc. is like, look it up or ask somebody (fine, I’ll open my DMs to this one too)

Thesauruses keep things from sounding too repetitive, but it’s still better just to naturally expand your vocabulary

If there’s something non-traditional about the formatting (e.g. thoughts being in italics), indicate that either in the author’s notes or at the beginning before the story starts

If you’re collabing with someone, communication and consent are key

Tag content warnings properly

Find the platform(s) that are right for you and consistently build there—Tumblr, FF.net, LiveJournal, Ao3, Wattpad, whatever

Just based on my experience if you don’t know where to post:

Wattpad tends to be better for OC or self-insert fanfics. Most writers are beginner-level and the fandoms tend to be really broad, like DC or Harry Potter

Fanfiction.net is…a little dicey. I know they’ve had issues in the past with censorship and stuff. Writing level ranges very greatly and it’s kind of hard to make yourself seen among so many users. They have more fandoms than Wattpad and they’ve also got a basic filtering system in place

LiveJournal is kinda old from my knowledge and I’m not even sure if people actually use it anymore. I know I haven’t ‘cause I’m part of a younger cohort, but hey, I might be wrong and it might be the perfect place for you

Tumblr is better for one-shots or fanfics with accompanying art or music from my experience. There’s a limit of thirty tags per post so you can cover your bases, but probably won’t be able to do specific ones. It’s relatively easy to get seen on Tumblr because their algorithm favors more recent posts in a weird way that I haven’t totally figured out. I’d say the average fanfic writing level in intermediate, but fair warning for gatekeepers, doxxers, etc. But that’s still unlikely unless you post something actually problematic

I think fandom Wiki or something allows people to write fanfics but I’m not sure

Goodreads is largely for published original works or classic stuff like the Iliad so…fanfics won’t fare so well there

Just avoid Reddit and 4chan for your own sake

Ao3 has writers of all levels too, but leans more towards the intermediate to proficient end. There are a lot of fandoms big and small and though there’s some OC/reader-insert content, the vast majority of works stick to canon characters. The tags get as specific as you like and filtering system is great, with places available in nearly every language you write in. There’s a wait period if you want to sign up and it’s also pretty uncensored

And remember: your first work isn’t gonna be too good and that’s okay. Practice makes perfect, and even the best of us always have room to grow!

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thatrudeengineer · 3 years

Note

1/4/8/9/13/14/19! Split them up if it gets too long i just like bullying you

Munday stuff! | Always accepting

XDD It’s okayyyy I like your bullying! But obviously u dun know me yet x3 I don’t run at the sight of long posts. Buckle up everyone! We’re going for a ride!

1. What little things do you do special when writing your muse(s) that you wonder if anyone has noticed?

I really like this question, and yet it makes me genuinely wonder... One thing I do but which might not be apparent for people who only know me from one blog, is that I try (try being the keyword here) to change the tone of the writing to match the character. I can’t do much about my general style when it comes to descriptions, it just always comes back, but even then, I use different words depending on the muse even when outside of speech. I’d say that’s pretty subtle though, and maybe I’m the only one who can even notice that but that’s something I pay attention to haha!

Another small thing I like to do, despite writing in a mostly omniscient way, is keep strictly to the character’s pov, even if it means delivering skewed information sometimes. Again I don’t always do that, but sometimes it’s especially relevant and it makes me smile to myself.

I also like separating clearly the speech’s style from the description style, even if I like modifying descriptions a bit to fit the character, I avoid using accents of the specific way the character might be talking. That’s something you’ve maybe noticed in how I write Serik, he’s got specific turns of phrase that I pay special attention to.

One last thing is dropping hints to my character’s past or backstory that explain a current action. Just one line or two. Taken on its own it doesn’t seem much. It might even seem like it’s just a passing thought from the muse, or a reflection of the ‘narrator’ but then hopefully the full info comes out later in RP, or it’s explained OOCly and suddenly the scene can be read on a different level, however small. I like that, even if it’s not all that much, but at the very least I find it satisfying.

4. Has your muse ever gotten very emotional and ‘taken over’ for a reply in a way you didn’t expect?

Always. All the f-ing time! And honestly? That’s how I like my RP the best. Even when the muse isn’t emotional, I try to act as a channel for the character and to avoid guiding things as much as I can. Some muses are easier and louder than others (Serik is one such muse), but that’s what I try to tend towards, even if the action I’m getting from the muse might not seem IC or like it comes from nowhere. In my experience, there’s usually an explanation to that kind of intuition, even if we don’t see it yet. And stifling this tends to smother the muses for me. I prefer relying on the raw intuitive reactions I can get from the muse.

I know everyone is different but that’s what works for me. For me it’s not like I’m watching the character in the room with me or in a mindscape, but more like they’re behind me and I’m the channel and filter in a way. It’s a matter of getting into the right mindset to more or less disappear from the picture. There’s always a bit of leeway at least for reactions but usually they’re very clear to me when the muse is loud.

So when the muse gets very emotional, you can be sure they steer things their way even more. It’s led to really interesting plot-twists over the years. Some that even completely broke the plotting we’d done with the other mun. And I live for those moments. But it’s also part of why I’m increasingly wary of doing RP out of chronological order. I enjoy it immensely, don’t get me wrong, but I just know the muse will do a bad at some point. Something we didn’t expect and derail the RPs set later in time.

Okay... Okay I give XD The rest under the readmore because it’s long!

8. What are other formats you’ve written creatively in (poetry, prose, script, etc)?

I feel a bit bad but... None, really. I’ve done some poetry for school but that hardly counts. And some dabbling in “““““Fanfics”““““ with massive quotation marks because I was so young and I didn’t even have an outline of anything beyond what I was writing in the moment XD Nor did I really publish anything (and what little I might have is now lost somewhere in the depths of the internet, tho for the better really).

I don’t know if it can be called creative writing because it’s mostly drawing but... One thing I did a lot before diving properly into the RP scene on tumblr (my RP was purely in private with my best friend using pictochat before that), was make fancomics. That was my main creative outlet before RP took over. I would have full storylines scripts outlined -- I still have a bunch of them -- even if I never finished drawing a single of those comics. One of them (one of my biggest endeavours, really) is on my personal blog. It didn’t go too far but sometimes I miss doing those.

9. Do you like writing and building up background or NPC characters to your muse?

Answered [here]! :D

Short answer is yesssss, but only really when it’s for OCs and not as much for canon characters.

13. Do you like making promos?

I like the idea of making promos, but it’s a bit the same for me as graphic design. I like the idea of it, but I don’t think I’m good at that at all. I enjoy drawing art for fellow muns that I appreciate, sometimes even art that kind of dual-promotes both blogs, but actual promos? Nah. I really admire people who can, but I’m not cut out for making them.

14. Are you a big fan of AUs?

-Eyes Serik’s verses (still under-construction) page-

...

-Eyes other muses’ Verses pages-

>___>

-Sweats profusely-

Yes. The answer is yes.

19. Explain something on your blog that has a metaphorical/symbolical meaning or is a reference to something else (URL, a tag, blog title, etc)

Hmmm. I’m going to go with something extremely obscure. This blog’s URL used to be “ThatRunawayGuy” simply because that was a big part of then-Sail’s backstory before I reworked this character from the ground up. When I did though, it didn’t really fit as much at all anymore, so I had to find something else. But the ‘that’ in ThatRudeEngineer is a direct reference to the original URL.

Another very trivial thing I can explain that doesn’t even show is the tag I use for memes. “Dash Games”. It’s a common tag, nothing original. But I have a sort of inside joke with myself every time I write it down. Each time, I want to complete it as “Dash games will make you crash” but it’s too long and I didn’t want the possible confusion with a computer crash so I never used that. But just the idea of Serik playing games on his plane’s dashboard and nearly crashing because of that makes me smile every time.

#Anon #meme answer #ask reply #munday #((I kno who u are x3 u win this round -shakes fistsies-))

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gaalee-bingo · 4 years

Text

bingo rules and faq

how does this work?

gaalee bingo is a low-key, no-obligation event to create gaalee content! this blog will gather prompts throughout the month of september, and cards will be filled during the month of october. bingo cards will be created in 3x3, 4x4, and 5x5 formats. each card will have a unique set of prompts. individual cards will not be issued; rather, cards will be posted publicly here on tumblr (2 cards of each size--a green card and a red card--because, well, it’s gaalee). you can choose to work from a single card or multiple cards. prompt fills can be art, fic, moodboards, playlists, icon sets, panel edits, memes, cosplay, photos of your dog dressed as gaara, etc. as long as it’s gaalee and fits a prompt, it counts!

when is this happening?

prompt submissions will be open from september 1st - september 30th, 2020. all bingo cards will be published on october 1st. you can post your prompt fills at any time between october 1st - october 31st (halloween!)

how do i submit a prompt?

go to the submissions page to submit prompts. prompts will not be published individually or associated with your username, so feel free to submit as many as you want. i will simply be using the submissions queue to gather prompts to develop the bingo cards. submitting prompts is not an obligation to participate in filling a bingo card.

what kind of prompts are needed?

prompts can be any topic you’d like! a prompt can be as simple as a color, as straightforward as an AU, or as broad as an emotion. please ensure prompts are no more than 1-3 words; this is so they fit onto the bingo square while still being legible. prompts should be safe-for-work so that anyone can fill them. i reserve the right to edit or decline to use a prompt. not all prompts may make it onto a card, especially if there are a lot of them. examples of possible prompts might be things like: ‘high school AU’, ‘mutual pining’, ‘sunflowers’, ‘bliss’.

how do i sign up to fill a bingo card?

there are no formal sign-ups for this event. cards will be posted publicly and tagged ‘cards’. there will be a total of 6 cards in 3 sizes (3x3, 4x4, and 5x5). you can announce that you’re choosing to fill a certain card, or you can pick from among many cards. just go with what sparks your interest! this is supposed to be a fun, laid-back event in this very stressful year.

i don’t think i can create (3, 5, 25) things in a month. do i need to aim for a bingo or black out?

nope! if you want to fill 1 square, that’s fine. if you want to pick and choose only the prompts on a card that speak to you, that’s also fine. if you want to black-out all 6 cards, i will shit my pants in awe, but that’s absolutely fine.

what are the minimum requirements for a prompt fill?

i’m going to leave this open to the individual participants. if you feel like what you’ve created meets the prompt, it counts. i’m not here to judge your creative interpretations. a single creation (fic, art, icon set, playlist) can only count towards one bingo square at a time. however, if you make something that is long-form, such as a multichapter fic or a comic (or a rock opera), individual chapters or comic pages (or songs) can be counted as separate prompt fills.

can my prompt fill be nsfw?

sure, if that’s where the inspiration takes you! any nsfw content posted on tumblr should be appropriately tagged and behind a ‘read more’. any nsfw content hosted off-site should likewise be clearly labeled. if you are creating nsfw art, be mindful of tumblr’s content guidelines. you may want to consider posting a cropped or censored image on tumblr and linking to another site (twitter, privatter, pixiv, imgur) for the full image. i ask that individuals under 18 not create nsfw material for the bingo.

i have something i’m already working on that meets a prompt, can that count?

yes, with caveats. the creation must be new (posted on or after october 1st) to count towards a bingo square. if you already have a project in the works and something new you’re adding to the project meets a prompt, that can count. for example, if you’re in the middle of publishing a 500k sci-fi epic, and you post chapter 13 of that during the bingo period, you can count that towards a square with the prompt ‘sci-fi’. if you say you created something with the bingo/prompt in mind, i’m gonna take your word for it. the only other restriction is that if you’re creating your art/fic/etc. for another event (e.g. a ship week, theme week, exchange), you should check the rules of that event to ensure they don’t have any restrictions on counting a project towards multiple events.

what do i get for completing my card?

badges will be awarded for the following: 1st prompt fill, “scattershot” fills (filling 3 or more prompts that don’t result in a bingo), four corners, any bingo line, and blackout (whole card completed). i’ll post your badge when i reblog your post. badges are just little icons that you can keep for your own satisfaction. they don’t convey any special privileges other than my undying admiration.

how do i post a prompt fill?

post your fill here on tumblr (or a link to your fill if it’s hosted offsite), and tag @gaalee-bingo in your post! be sure to actually ping the blog directly; if you just post it to the tags, your prompt fill may be lost. be sure to note which prompt and which card you’re completing and if you hit any of the badge levels. any longform fic should be behind a ‘read more’ or hosted offsite, so as not to clog people’s dashes. please be considerate when tagging and warning for your fills; use your best judgment to warn for common triggers. if it’s been more than 24 hours since you posted your prompt fill and i have yet to reblog it and/or issue your badge, please send an ask here or to @ghoste-catte. if you’re posting a fill to Ao3, you can add it to the gaalee_bingo collection by typing ‘GaaLee_Bingo’ (without quotation marks) in the ‘collections’ box when you post you work.

what if i fill a prompt after october 31st?

we always love more gaalee material! tag the blog, and i’ll still do my best to reblog it! i just can’t commit to a 24-hour timeframe or to creating badges after the conclusion of the event. i’ll do my best, though.

i have another question that you didn’t answer!

send an ask and i’ll answer as soon as possible!

#faq #rules #guidelines

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usuallydistinguishedcolor · 4 years

Text

I was tagged by @letsbealone-together

Thank you! ♥️♥️♥️

(This is the first time anybody has tagged me in anything, so let’s hope I did it right)

When did you become a louie?

I don’t know the timeline exactly because it was a long time ago, but I know I first heard about One Direction (on Google+!!) at some point before the 2012 Summer Olympics. I remember seeing a post with just five pairs of eyes and feeling drawn to the strikingly blue ones. I watched WMYB, decided to figure out which name belonged to which person, and accidentally became obsessed.

Why did you become a louie?

His sense of humor! His gorgeous eyes and smile! His emotional voice! I think it was the absolute chaos of the video diaries - I couldn’t stop laughing. The more I learn about him the more I find to love. I love how much he cares - about his band, his family, and his fans.

One thing that drew you in specifically?

He’s just unique. His eyes drew me in at the beginning, but his sense of humor kept me a fan. I really love the way he’s able to be so bluntly honest yet make it come off as a joke

Favourite song on Walls?

Defenseless!! Or Fearless! It really depends on the day, because the album literally has no skips. I’ve been listening to it on repeat all summer.

Who would you want Louis to collab with?

Louis’ lyrics tend to be quite specific, which I associate with Broadway. It would be interesting to hear something with Lin Manuel Miranda. They both have strong lyrics and emotional yet technically weaker voices. I just really want Louis to do a musical? It’ll never happen, but a girl can daydream, right? (I love his voice the way it is, but I think it would be great for him to work with a vocal coach on a totally different style and see what crosses back over when he goes back to his actual style. Especially since when he was in 1D, he had to fit his voice into that style/range instead of exploring what truly fits his voice. His voice is naturally so high, but he seems way more comfortable down at the bottom of his range? I’d love to hear him play with his head voice. It would also be a cool full circle moment since he’s pointed to his Grease experience as the time he realized he could sing)

This is a weird choice, but I saw someone else answer with this and it won’t get out of my head. I think a Taylor Swift collab could be really cool? Again, they both count their lyrics as their strong suit. However, they’ve both been romantically linked to the same person by the media, so unless the song was very clearly about a different situation, it would just cause drama.

Speaking of weird: Zayn. I know their music is quite different, but that would just make any song they made together more interesting! Also, it hurts my heart that they used to be so close - I just want them to be friends again

I kinda feel like FINNEAS’ music is similar - very emotional and lyrically dense. I Lost A Friend makes me cry, especially if I’m thinking about Louis and Zayn when I listen to it. I’d love to hear what they would make together.

Favourite hairstyle?

The cinnamon swirl is extra beautiful

Back To You, Just Hold On or Miss You?

(Just Like You. I like the reminder that our fav celebrities are actual humans too)

To answer the actual question: Just Hold On. I don’t like dance/club type music, so I’m not really into the production, but I love the message. I’d give anything for an acoustic version!

Louis in suits or sweaters?

Both! I lean towards the sweaters because he looks so comfy and cozy and they make me really crave a cuddle, but he is so incredible handsome in a suit. It’s completely unfair how gorgeous he is.

Favourite tattoo?

I’ll not lie; I’m not one for tattoos - I was kinda disappointed when he got his first one. However, I have a soft spot for the quiet simple ones. I think the cuppa tea is my favorite, but the quotation marks are a close second.

Favourite Louis photo?

Random extra?

I think Perfect Now gets a bad rep. I really love the growly high note in the last chorus. Also, I bought red sneakers and still wear stripes because of his Up All Night era “uniform”

Originally posted by larryloves

I’m tagging @pie-lover-67 and @grank99

#louis tomlinson #tag game

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olliya · 4 years

Text

How popular is MadaSaku in context of other Madara’s and Sakura’s ships? Part 2 - revamped

Thank you @purple-possibilities for your suggestions about searches of multi-words phrases on ff.net. Putting the phrase between quotation marks worked and I could include 4 additional phrases into searches for each ship!

Additionally, I noticed and error! Grrrr... Even though I took under consideration that Tobisaku may mean Tobirama x Sakura and Obito x Sakura, later on I switched from manual to automatic layout of formulas in my excel. And, of course, automatic layout had no clue about Obito/Tobi thing...

So, important errata: Tobirama had only 13 fics (as opposed to 31 which I reported) according to Ship Names Searches. I corrected it also in the original post.

I’m posting the improved version below, but for those who are not into reading this again: Including additional Ship Names in my search didn’t change much. Lee and Ino switched places 6th and 7th, Madara x OC ship gained a lot of entries, but not enough for a position change, and that’s basically it.

Finding the popularity of ships on ff.net is both easier and more complicated, depending how do you approach the problem.

Let’s break down the task into two parts.

Approach 1

FF.net has a Pairing Option that was introduced in October 2013. This function makes the names of characters appear in square bracket, for example: [Madara U., Sakura H.] indicating that those characters form a romantic pair in a given fic.

When using Filters (Figure 1.a.) after choosing the character of interest, one can tick the Pairing Option, and then browse (using up and down arrows) through all the characters of the fandom. The number of fics tagged with Pairing Option between the character of interest (here: Madara) and every character B (here: Sakura) appear on the bottom of the panel (Figure 1.b.).

Data gathered through browsing through all of the Naruto characters with Pairing Option On give unequivocal results. The only limitations of this method is the relatively late introduction time point of Pairing Option (introduced in 2013, while Naruto started publishing in 1999), and sometimes peculiar definitions of “Characters” on ff.net (example: Naruko as a separate character, “Team 7” as a “Character”).

Results for Madara and Sakura are presented below (Figures 2. and 3.) For clarity, ships with four or more fics are shown for Madara. In case of Sakura, all the ships with >4 fics in a graph would blur the picture. Therefore, her Top 20 ships are presented in Figure 3., and the rest is summarized in the Table 1. The analysis was performed on 22.10.2019.

However, ff.net was launched on 15.10.1998 (which precedes publication of Naruto by one year) so there is a 14 year-worth of fic creation when the Pairing Option wasn’t available. To get the complete overview of ship popularity it is necessary to include the body of work created in the earlier years of ff.net.

This issue was addressed through Approach 2.

Approach 2

During the period of 1998-2013 fics were labelled with ship names in the summaries, and readers would look for ships of interest typing ship name into the search box. During those times certain conventional phrases were coined for the ships, and putting those in the summary allowed potential readers to find the story. Searching ff.net using selected phrases and collecting the corresponding fic numbers gives insight into those part of fanworks. Employment of search engine is shown in Figure 4. on the example of phrase “madasaku”.

I performed searches for common ships, basing the list on the ships with 4 or more fics as found using Pairing Option (see: section above).

I searched for the phrases that were and still are still commonly used ship names in Naruto fandom.

In general, there are three common ways to indicate a ship:

a) Merger of names, usually using first two syllables of both names, usually (but not always) with male name being first part of the phrase. Example: madasaku, and (less commonly used) sakumada. For the M/M and F/F couples, both orders are used, and it is impossible to predict which form is more common. Example: sakuhina and hinasaku would be used with similar frequency. In case of names composed of two syllables or shorter, one syllable is often used.

b) Name_1xName_2 – complete names of characters separated by letter “x”, without spaces in between. There is no strict preference as to which name goes first more frequently, i.e. sakuraxmadara is equally plausible as madaraxsakura.

The same naming scheme exists also in a version with spaces (example: Madara x Sakura). Searching for such phrases (and all phrases including spaces) required putting the Ship Name between quotation marks (”Madara x Sakura”).

c) A combination of the above, i.e. shortened versions of names connected with an “x”; with spaces (example: mada x saku) and without spaces (madaxsaku - again searched using apostrophes)

Search engine of ff.net is case-insensitive, i.e. searching for “madasaku” will bring the same results as searching for “Madasaku” and “MadaSaku” (thank gods).

Naming convention that is common on AO3, i.e. separating character names with slash “/”, isn’t correctly recognized by search engine. If the phrase is written without usage of spaces (example: Madara/Sakura) the search results in list of fics containing “Madara” and “Sakura”, not necessary together (slash symbol gets ignored). When phrase “Madara/Sakura” is searched with quotation marks, slash still gets ignored and results include all entries with any symbol between the names. Therefore, the ship names weren’t included in this analysis.

Other potential ship names variations (using “*”, using “&”, and surely a multitude of others variants that I couldn’t think of) were not included due to their relative infrequency (and limits to my capacity and imagination).

For every ship included in the results of Approach 1 (total 43 searches for Sakura’s ships, and 12 searches for Madara’s ships), I searched for the following phrases (on example of MadaSaku ship):

madasaku

sakumada

madaraxsakura

sakuraxmadara

madaxsaku

sakuxmada

madara x sakura

sakura x madara

mada x saku

saku x mada

Certain ship names don’t follow the usual rules and/or required special treatment. For example, for the ship Gaara/Haruno Sakura the common name merger is GaaSaku (and not GaaraSaku). Tsunade/ Haruno Sakura is equally often (or rarely, because it is very rare) abbreviated to TsuSaku and Tsunasaku. Fics tagged with TobiSaku name merger may mean Senju Tobirama/Haruno Sakura as well as Tobi (Obito’s persona)/Haruno Sakura – in this case, fics were manually inspected, and assigned to correct categories. Ship with Naruko (which scored relatively high in Pairing Option analysis), was not possible to correctly assess, because the merger name “narusaku” is identical for the merger of Uzumaki Naruto/Haruno Sakura (for good reasons).

All the fics for given pair were summed up (i.e. for Uchiha Madara/Haruno Sakura ship the fic numbers retrieved through searches for “madasaku”, “sakumada”, “madaraxsakura”, “sakuraxmadara”, “madaxsaku”, “sakuxmada” “madara x sakura”, “sakura x madara”, “mada x saku” and “saku x mada” were added together). The obtained results will be referred to as those of “Ship Name” in this analysis.

Results for Madara and Sakura are presented below (Figures 5. and 6.). In case of Sakura, including all the examined ships in a graph would blur the picture. Therefore, her Top 20 ships are presented in Figure 6., and the rest is summarized in the Table 2. The analysis was performed on 22.10.2019. The additionally searches performed on 31.12.2019 did not take under consideration fics published after 22.10.2019, to reflect the state of fandom on the day of main analysis.

This list presented in Table 2 is not a comprehensive one. There are certainly more ships with >10 fics that were not included. One prominent, detected example is Chōji, who has 13 fics in as a ship partner of Sakura, but was not included in Table 2 because according to the Pairing Option he had no fics with Sakura.

Limitations of the method

Employed method depends on performing six independent searches and summing up the numbers from those searches. A fic tagged with more than one of the searched phrases will be counted multiple times. For example: if a fic contained phrases “MadaSaku” and “MadaraxSakura” in its summary, it was counted twice. In extreme case, one fic would generate ten data points: one real, and nine false.

Nevertheless, since the same treatment was applied to all the pairings, the errors should be distributed in the same way across all the ships. Therefore, even if the numerical values obtained through this analysis don’t necessarily correspond to reality, the results should reflect respective relations between the ships (i.e. “ranking” should be correct). This assumption is true however only if all the subdivisions of the fandom follow the same customs and tagging etiquette. I.e. if creators writing for SasuSaku followed a habit of including only one Ship Name in their summaries, while creators of MadaSaku tended to include multiple Ship Names, then my method of analysis would overestimate the significance of MadaSaku ship. However, I am not aware about such trends existing in Naruto fandom.

Additionally, Ship Name tagging system allows for tagging infinite number of ships in one fic, therefore certain fics have been counted multiple times.

Discussion

When considering fics tagged with Pairing Option, Sakura ranks as Madara’s second most popular ship partner, after Hashirama and before Tobirama. As on AO3, it is telling that a relatively “exotic” pairing with OC ranks 4th among Madara’s ships.

Madara is the 9th most popular ship partner of Sakura. Comparing and contrasting Sakura’s data between ff.net and AO3 would be an interesting analysis in its own right, but here I will only point out the switch of positions between Naruto and Kakashi as Sakura’s ship partners (Naruto is a strong 2nd on ff.net, while Kakashi takes this position on AO3); and relatively low, 7th place of Ino (strong 4th on AO3).

When taking into account data gathered though Ship Names Searches, Sakura ranks as Madara’s 2nd most popular ship partner (after Hashirama and before OC).

Madara, on the other hand is Sakura’s 15th most popular ship partner. Since Ship Names Searches results are mostly derived from fics published in earlier years in Naruto fandom, his lower place can be explained by his very late appearance in the franchise (on-panel in February 2008 - almost 9 years after Naruto started publishing and in person in the story in October 2011 - 12 years after begin of publishing).

Data gathered in this analysis present a unique opportunity for looking into the development of ship popularity over time.

Results from Pairing Option reflect mostly the state of fandom in years 2013-2019, while the results from Ship Names Search show the status from the earlier years. The exact division is however somewhat blurred as some fics published before October 2013 has been retroactively tagged using Pairing Option (even if the majority of older fics remain untagged). The reverse is also true – many fics published after introduction of Pairing Option, even as recently as end of 2019, fail to use it. Additionally, many fics are tagged using both systems: the Pairing Option and Ship Name in summary.

Nevertheless one can tentatively regard Pairing Option results as “new”, or “current” ones, while the ones coming from the Ship Names Searches as “older” ones.

Figure 7. presents position changes in Top 12 Madara’s ships. Ranking from Pairing Option analysis was regarded as current and compared to the “older” ranking composed from all the fics tagged with Ship Names (regardless their publishing date). A positive value in the Figure 7. indicates a gain of popularity, for example: Tobirama gained 2 positions among Madara’s ships when comparing the “current” and “older” results.

This analysis reveals that certain ships (with Tobirama, Naruto and Hinata) gained, while ships with OC and Itachi lost on popularity. Dramatic loss of Itachi ship popularity is very interesting and one can speculated that it could be caused by Tobi/Obito reveal.

The same analysis was performed for Sakura’s ships and is presented in Figure 8.

Inspecting changes in Sakura ships’ rankings allows for several interesting observations. Minato, Shisui, Madara and Sasori are among greater winners. It is symptomatic that all, except Sasori, are characters that appeared (or became relevant) later during the franchise. Among the characters losing in popularity as Sakura’s ship partners are members of Konoha Eleven (Lee, Kiba, Sai, Neji), an Akatsuki member (Deidara) and OC. It should also be noted that five top positions (Sasuke, Naruto, Kakashi, Itachi and Gaara) remained unchanged.

To further examine the “current” and “older” state of fandom, upon harvesting Ship Names data I sorted the fics according to publication date and took note of how many fics were published before and how many after 01.10.2013 (approximate date of introduction of Pairing Option tool).

If one repeats the analysis from Figures 7. and 8. considering only fics published before 01.10.2013 as “older” ones, the following pictures appears (Figure 9. and 10.):

Using this definition of “older” fics (i.e. fics tagged with Ship Names that were published until October 2013), the gain of popularity of Tobirama ship becomes even more evident (gain of 7 positions). Ships with Itachi (as in the previous analysis) and Sasuke (undetected in the previous analysis) lost on popularity.

Sakura ships’ dynamics according to this definition of “older” fics show even more pronounced positions’ gains of Minato and Shisui, but otherwise similar trends to previous analysis.

Analysis of ship popularity on ff.net is a challenging one, but since this platform was, and still is main archive for Naruto fandom (407 thousands fics vs 49 thousand on AO3) it is important to address this issue even if methodology is far from perfect.

I am open to all the comments, suggestions and hints, as the data collection was a major effort and I’m sure that this data can be used in many other different ways.

And, your feedback showed me that people are interested in such stuff. Thank you for this!!! I have at least three further ideas for analysis, and now, when I have some experience and first insight into data, it will be easier.

#multisaku #madasaku #fandom statistics #naruto stats

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cutepresea · 4 years

Text

1-3 Titan Symphony: A Moment’s Respite

Again, apologies for the spam.

If you want to blacklist these, you can use either the tag #titan symphony for just this event, or #xdu event scripts for all these posts in general.

Reminder that these are copied straight from XD Unlimited itself, so any grammatical weirdness, mistranslations, and/or mischaracterizations are not my doing.

Eren: "Mrf! Dish ish... sho good!"

Armin: "I can't believe it! This is meat! Real meat!"

Mikasa: "Mrm, really!"

Hibiki Tachibana: "Wow... They're, uh... Really going at that meat, huh?"

Chris Yukine: "Guess they just really like meat... I can't even hear myself think over the racket they're making."

Tsubasa Kazanari: "They must be starving after all the fighting they've been through."

Chris Yukine: "Even that wouldn't explain these meat maniacs...Hey, where's that Levi guy?"

Hibiki Tachibana: "He's with Elfnein-chan in the lab. They're fixing up the omni-directional mobility gear."

Chris Yukine: "Oh, yeah. They've gotta replace the blades and refill the gas canisters, right?"

Tsubasa Kazanari: "That equipment could be the difference between life and death. I'm sure he'd want to be there himself to oversee the repairs."

Chris Yukine: "These guys seem way more concerned with meat than with life and death, that's for sure..."

Armin: "Sorry about that... It's just that in our worlds, meat is so valuable that we rarely ever get to eat it."

Hibiki Tachibana: "There's plenty to go around, so eat up!"

Mikasa: "I'll have seconds, then."

Chris Yukine: "Sure, coming right up."

Eren: "Looks like you two are fast friends already..."

Armin: "Oh, that's right! I got so caught up in my food that I completely forgot! Eren, I have to tell you something."

Eren: "What is it?"

Armin: "After you transformed, all the other Titans circled you and started attacking, right? Well, she saved you."

Eren: "Huh?! What?!"

Mikasa: "You don't remember?"

Eren: "My memory's pretty hazy. You tend to get me out of trouble, so I just assumed it was you, Mikasa."

Eren: "...Why did you save me?"

Hibiki Tachibana: "Like I said before, if someone's in trouble, it's only natural that I'd want to help them."

Eren: "......"

Chris Yukine: "Don't waste your breath. At this point, saving people is basically her hobby."

Eren: "Her hobby, huh? But to put her life on the line for a stranger like that... She must be kind of an idiot."

Chris Yukine: "Well, yeah. We've all sorta figured that out by now."

Hibiki Tachibana: "Hey!"

Armin: "I wouldn't be so quick to judge, Eren. You and her seem to be two of a kind."

Eren: "Oh, come on, I'm not that much of an idiot!"

Mikasa: "No, he has a point. You're quite reckless."

Eren: "Seriously? What are you, my mom or something?!"

Hibiki Tachibana: "Ahahaha!"

Tsubasa Kazanari: "Each group of friends has its own reckless fool, it would appear."

Chris Yukine: "Are your friends back home all like this, too?"

Eren: "Well, they're... odd. One's a freaky researcher, and one goes crazy if she sees meat."

Armin: "Come to think of it, if Sasha ever finds out about these meals, there'll be trouble..."

Eren: "Yeah. Let's tell her all about it when we get back!"

Mikasa: "Not unless you want her to kill us, Eren."

Tsubasa Kazanari: "They really do sound like strange people."

Armin: "How about you? Are there any more of you?"

Hibiki Tachibana: "Of course! Now, were to start? Well..."

Levi: "...I should get back to getting ready."

Levi: "It was generous of them to offer us shelter, but I have to wonder... How often is this place cleaned?"

Genjuro Kazanari: "Good morning! Did you get a good night's rest?"

Eren: "Yeah, thanks. I feel much better now."

Genjuro Kazanari: "Make sure you're completely prepared before going out to fight again."

Genjuro Kazanari: "Before you head out, though, Armin had a suggestion that I'd like you to run by the wielders."

Hibiki Tachibana: "A suggestion?"

Armin: "Yes. During yesterday's battle, we ended up being surrounded by Titans.[1]

Armin: "The main reason for that was because we were fighting on flat ground, and couldn't use our ODM gear properly."

Chris Yukine: "Yeah, you're right."

Armin: "So, how about you Symphogear wielders combine your power with us Scouts, and fight together?"

Chris Yukine: "Easier said than done. Our fighting style's totally different, that's just obvious. How do we make it work?"

Armin: "Your Symphogear has the power to create large objects, right?"

Tsubasa Kazanari: "Yes. My blades, for example, and Yukine's missiles."

Armin: "I think that if we shoot our ODM gear's anchors into them, we can gain altitude even on the flat plains."

Chris Yukine" Wait, so you'd be shooting your anchors in our direction? Isn't that strategy a little unreasonable?!"

Tsubasa Kazanari: "Actually, it's rather ingenious. Combining our strengths will leave us with fewer weak points."

Eren: "Those two seem like they'd be fine, but what about you? Do you have the same sort of weaponry as them?"

Hibiki Tachibana: "Not to worry! I have a technique that lets me flip the ground. I can make a wall for you guys."

Eren: "Well, I wasn't expecting that..."

Hibiki Tachibana: "Anyways, I look forward to trying this plan out!"

Eren: "Yeah, let's hope it works out."

Chris Yukine: "Just don't throw off my missile speed."

Mikasa: "Of course. There'll be no issue there."

Levi: "I'll be counting on you for those walls."

Tsubasa Kazanari: "You mean blades, not walls! Although, I suppose I can try and use my power to form a wall for you to use."

Genjuro Kazanari: "Looks like we're joining forces. Good suggestion, kid."

Armin: "Well, the strategy works in theory, but I'm a little worried about putting it into practice..."

Genjuro Kazanari: "Don't worry about it. They're used to learning on the job."

Tsubasa Kazanari: "He's right. We won't stop until we've downed that Colossal Titan."

Eren: "Then let's do this!"

Chris Yukine: "Can we hurry this up already?!"

Levi: "Be patient. This sort of thing takes time. If we end up surrounded, we'll be completely helpless."

Hibiki Tachibana: "Yeah, we shouldn't just run blindly into the fray. If we rush in, we could end up at a disadvantage!"

Tsubasa: "Guh?!"

Levi: "Looks like they're not going to make this easy for us. There's far too much distance between us all."

Mikasa: "Perhaps we should split up and head for the cliff."

Chris Yukine: "Good plan. That way we can split up some of these Titans, too!"

Armin: "Pair up, everybody! One Scout and one wielder to a pair, just like we strategized!"

Levi: "We'll join up again to take on the Colossal Titan. Stay alive until then!"

Eren: "Yes, Lieutenant!"

Notes:

[1] Yes, the quotation mark was missing in the game’s text here and wasn’t a mistake on my end

#senki zesshou symphogear #symphogear #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #senki zesshou symphogear xd unlimited #symphogear xd unlimited #titan symphony #xdu event scripts #xdu scripts #crossover

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marmolady · 5 years

Text

Like Old Times

Book/Series: Endless Summer

Main Pairings: Estela x MC/Taylor (f)

Summary: Post-ending (Rourke ending). Set after my previous Rourke ending fics, but probably easy enough to follow without reading them first.

With attempts to rekindle the friendships lost met with minimal success, Taylor is in desperate need of a night off. No worrying about what she doesn’t have, just appreciating her small victories in the face of Rourke’s plans for her. But the boat dance might just stir memories in places she hadn’t expected...

Word Count: 7556

Warnings: the usual. Bit of coarse language and sexual references.

Reviews and reblogs are hugely appreciated!

Tagging: @brightpinkpeppercorn @sceptilemasterr @bbaba-yagaa@edgydepressedchoicesthot@blightarts@princessstellaris@acidsugar0@taramitch96 @sapphovonchat @strangerofbraidwood@noeschoices @queerchoicesblog@kennaxval@queerchoicesblog@mrsmontoya @saivilo @mind-reader1 @ezramitchells

The sounds, the scents, the images of the pristine beaches surrounding The Celestial took hold of Estela as she carefully managed her breathing. In her meditative state, it was where she always ended up… the thoughts that overcrowded her tired mind fell away, and it was just peace. Her time on La Huerta had been chaotic, but had also given her the nearest thing to the opposite of that- something close to tranquility, that she’d ever known. It was her happy place. Cross-legged on the couch in their Hartfeld apartment, she might as well be miles away.

In the background, Taylor was helping Diego with his outfit for the boat dance, the social event of the season. They would all be going- at least, as far as she could tell. It had taken some convincing to get Zahra on board, but if all she was ready to contribute to their mission was just to passively be there, then she’d need to passively be there when it mattered. Taylor was convinced that the more they spent time together publicly, as friends, the more memories would trickle back to those as yet beyond her reach. And so, she’d resigned herself to doing Zahra’s share of the housework for the next month as payment for her cooperation.

“Are you sure I’m not gonna be the only guy in a suit?”

“Diego, it’s a dance. I’m pretty sure it’s semi-formal affair. You’re gonna look very dapper.”

Taylor hugged him. That he was brave enough to go along to an event that would no doubt be brimming with happy couples, in spite of how much he ached for Varyyn, said a lot. Diego really was something special.

“Well, that’s me sorted. You might want to bring Estela back to the land of the living, it looks like she’s falling asleep.”

“Yeah…”

It had come as a great relief to Taylor that Estela had found a way of easing the storm in her mind; she hated to disturb her. She did, however, have her own special way of gently doing so. Reaching out with her mind rarely worked except with receptive Vaanti, but with the receiver in a meditative trance, it seemed she could manage a sort of crude one-way communication. She closed her eyes, and focused, sending out imagery like a radio signal.

Diego watched intently. “What are you saying?”

“It doesn’t really work like that… it’s not like with Varyyn. It’s kinda… vague and wordless. A feeling. Like a weird, fluffy mind hug.”

“So, you’re not, like, sending her mind sexts?”

Taylor snorted; her concentration broken. “Diego! Get that head of yours out of the gutter!”

Slowly, Estela blinked back into the present, and stretched out her arms. “…Hey.”

“Hey. I just thought you might want to start getting ready. We’ll have to make a move in half an hour.”

It took a moment for Estela to recall, deep as she’d been within herself. “Oh, that dance you’re dragging us along to.”

Taylor made air quotation marks as she spoke. “Yeah, ‘dragging’. You can’t pretend to me that you haven’t been looking forward to it, just a little…”

To be honest, Estela wasn’t sure how she felt. It would be awfully reminiscent of the times they’d all shared on La Huerta, celebrating together in defiance of everything that kept on trying to crush them. But it wouldn’t be like that this time. Most of her friends were far out of reach, and to see it starkly before her would not exactly be enjoyable. Taylor was convinced that the opportunity to let loose would be good for them all, and Estela trusted her judgement. She was determined to have fun, to forget about… everything… just for one night. It was what Taylor needed after being a supportive rock not just for Estela, but for Diego and Zahra as well. However hard it might be, Estela would make sure her wife had the breath of fresh air that she so deserved. She shrugged.

“Fine. I’ll admit it; just a little.” Letting herself be pulled onto her feet, Estela pecked a kiss to Taylor’s cheek. “I guess I better go get dressed…”

______________________________

The boat was heaving when Taylor’s party arrived.

Zahra winced. “You’re gonna want to point me towards the booze, because I will not survive this sober…”

Taylor whipped around, and handed her a Dark ‘n’ Stormy. “I’ve already got you covered, babe!”

“Call me that again and I’ll cut you.” Zahra took a swig and forced a smile. “But thanks, I guess.”

A face in the crowd drew Estela’s attention; pale, surrounded by long mane of russet. Quinn stumbled away from the dance floor, and sat down on one of the plush seats around the edge, fingers visibly digging into the cushion even at a distance. Instinctively, Estela glanced around for Taylor, someone rather better at offering friendly overtures than she herself was. But now, she was nowhere to be seen- lost in the sea of students.

Estela approached cautiously, going over in her mind what she might say. She’d talked to Quinn just the once since Rourke had implemented Project Janus, and it had been brief. To the demure redhead, she was good as a stranger. At least on La Huerta, there had been no need for awkward ‘getting to know you’ nonsense. Estela had focused on survival, on succeeding in her mission, and the friendships developed naturally, born of the experiences they’d shared. Shit, where was Cetus when you needed him? They’d have gathered together, kicked his scaly ass, and bada-bing bada-boom, they’d come out of it as friends… none of this awkward reaching out. Pulling herself together, Estela sat down beside Quinn. Should she smile? Quinn looked ill… surely, she shouldn’t look amused by that? But if she didn’t, would her serious gaze make Quinn nervous…? Where the hell was Taylor when she needed her?

“Hi,” she said quietly, at long last. “I just thought…” She cleared her throat. “I wanted to make sure you were all right… you don’t look so good. Can I do anything?”

Quinn smiled weakly. “Someone’s already getting me a glass of water.” Her eyes flickered over Estela’s earnest face. “You’ve probably got people to be with… but, if you don’t, I… I’d really like the company.”

The brunette sidled closer, by way of an answer.

“It’s Estela, right?”

A nod. “I wasn’t expecting to see you here. How have you… how have you been?” The last time Estela had encountered Quinn, she’d found her to be frighteningly weak, everything about her had just been tired. Now, she was clearly not healthy by any means, but she lacked the heavy rings around her eyes.

“Actually, I’ve been good. I’ve been sick for a long time, but recently… it feels like I have a reason to feel hopeful. Right now, though? I guess the movement of the boat’s making me queasy. I’ve been on a treatment for a little while; it’s helping me, but my body’s fragile.”

“If you’re prone to seasickness, maybe going to a boat dance wasn’t the best choice of social event for you to make your comeback on…”

With a hollow laugh, Quinn shook her head. “’Comeback’ kind of implies that I’d ever really been fit for these parties. I just hoped… this new treatment, you know, that I might finally catch up on everything I missed out on growing up.” Realising she was talking to a near stranger, her cheeks flushed. “I’m sorry! You came out for a good time; you don’t want to listen to this. You barely know me…”

“No. But I’d like to.” Hesitantly, Estela put her hand on Quinn’s arm, and to her relief, the action was met with a grateful smile. “If it helps, I’ve never really done stuff like this either. I met someone, not long ago; she’s shown me a lot of things I didn’t think I’d ever experience. What I’m trying to say is… you might feel like you’re, you know… different, but things can get better, and you’re not…”

“…Alone?”

“You’re not alone.”

Quinn studied Estela thoughtfully. She’d called herself a ‘friend’, and although Quinn couldn’t place her, she was certain that she knew the serious-eyed brunette from somewhere. Estela must have made an impression, for her face had cropped up in strange dreams. The new medication came with vivid dreams as a side-effect, but it struck Quinn as odd that vaguely familiar faces just kept coming up. A sharp, sudden pain made her gasp.

“Quinn! Are you…?” Estela’s eyes grew wide in alarm.

At that moment, Michelle returned. Immediately drawn back to Quinn who was clearly in distress, clutching her forehead, it barely registered that Estela was there too. “Is it your head?”

Quinn winced and nodded. “I think that water’s exactly what I need; thank you.”

Michelle handed her the glass, and began to gently rub her back. “Just take little sips, all right? Are you sure you don’t want to get back on dry land? It’s just a dance; there’ll be others.”

A sad cast of shadow seemed to flit across Quinn’s eyes, and her cheeks puffed as her lips formed a small pout. Of course, no one could understand what this meant to her; they didn’t have a clue…

“You shouldn’t miss out,” Estela said, causing Michelle to flinch, truly noticing her presence for the first time. Though the reaction was hurtful, she let it go. “This is important to you. Maybe, if you did have to leave the boat, we could keep you company. I dunno… have our own party.” She glanced away the second she’d made the suggestion, doubting herself, but looked back again, knowing that she owed Quinn that she at least try. “It’s gotta be better than sitting around feeling like you’ll hurl your guts.”

For a moment, Michelle’s mouth hung open, as if in preparation to protest, but she floundered. Estela, that quiet, scarred creep, looked at her expectantly. Who the hell did she think she was to put her in that position? Then she looked at Quinn, and something within her was stirred. A protective instinct. Was it just the doctor in her? She would, of course, be a natural. But it wasn’t just that… it was almost familial, the need to care. Who was Quinn, anyway? And who was Estela?

The words formed before Michelle could even comprehend why she was speaking them; “She’s right. You’re not about to just sit here sick and miserable, not on my watch. Let’s got you back on dry land- at least for now. You’re going to have a good time tonight if it kills me!”

_____________________________

Taylor sat herself down with a drink in her hand, taking in the buzzing atmosphere on the boat, having lost Diego to the appetiser table. She felt a sad pang at the sight of Raj at the centre of a bustling, laughing cluster of revellers. Sean and Craig were there too, magnets for the university’s popular crowd. It was a world where Taylor was unwelcome, and as much as she wanted to go running over and put her arms around her friends, they weren’t on La Huerta anymore. She shook her head. No; she wasn’t going to get hung up over all that. This should be a party party, not a pity party.

“Are you okay, Taylor?”

When she looked up, there was Grace, her face a picture of kind concern.

“Grace, hi!” Taylor beamed, and scooched over, inviting her friend to join her. “It’s… really good to see you. Finally letting your hair down, with exams finished?”

Grace smiled, right to her eyes. “It’s really good to see you, too. I’ve been meaning to catch you for ages; it’s just… sometimes I think I’ll drown from the pressure. From everything. Tonight… it’s one of the first times I’ve let myself switch off for so long. I feel as though I’ve been holding my breath for months, and I was just so used to it I didn’t notice.”

Taylor put an arm around her. She’d tried to be there for Grace, but through all her attempts to connect, she’d felt as though she was just another burden. “Well, take a deep breath; you’ve earned it. And… before you go back under, do you wanna hang out?”

The two girls leaned on the boat’s edge, looking out at the water, sparkling in the moonlight. Taylor hadn’t expected this -Grace was not one to frequent social events. Grace’s amiable nature made her someone with whom Taylor had been able to easily form a comfortable acquaintance, but moving beyond that had been challenging.

“You look really gorgeous tonight,” Taylor said, admiring the glittering violet dress Grace was wearing. The whole time they were on La Huerta, she never saw her dress up like this.

“You too!” Grace replied brightly. “My mom bought it for me. I was supposed to be going along to this gala a few months ago.” She sighed. “It didn’t last long before I realised, I was there only as another sparkling accessory. Tonight, I’m wearing this for me. Who knows when I’ll give myself another night off?”

“Good for you. Between you and me, I think you’re absolutely rocking it.”

Grace laughed. It was true, she’d been missing out. Desperate as she was to meet the lofty expectations she was held to, there had been no time for friends. And Taylor, she’d realised, was a wonderful, wonderful friend. More than that, there was something there… something mysterious that was beginning to fall together.

“It’s funny, Taylor,” she said. “When I’m with you, sometimes I feel like I could be a whole other person; courageous, someone who would take on the world, someone who her friends could always rely on.”

“Grace… that’s always been you.”

Grace glanced away shyly, her cheeks flushing. “No one’s ever seen me in that way. I know my mother never has. For so long, I’ve been afraid that no one would ever truly see me, believe in who I am. You barely know me, but somehow, I feel like there’s so much beneath the surface. Perhaps some people were always meant to be friends!”

Her heart thumping wildly, Taylor put her arms around her dear friend in a gentle hug. Can’t you see that you know me? Everything we overcame together? Don’t you remember?

“I believe it. Some people you just can’t help but be drawn to.”

“…Taylor? Can I tell you something… strange?” Grace bit her lip nervously. This was something she’d not dared talk about, not to anyone. It was all so fantastical, almost beyond belief. “I know you won’t laugh at me.”

“Of course.” Taylor’s breath caught in her throat. Was this… did she…?

“I’ve had dreams. The same nightmares over and over; every night after I’d talked to you- sometimes even if I only saw you. It made me afraid of you, and I’m sorry. I knew all along that you only wanted to be a friend, and I so badly needed a friend…”

Taylor gave her hand a squeeze, trying to be reassuring, even though adrenaline was surging through her own body. “Oh, honey, don’t apologize! That would make anyone nervous…”

With a weak smile, Grace continued. “First I dreamed the same thing over and over… I was kept prisoner in this cell, all alone. There were guards… guards with metal armour… I never saw their faces. But what was frightening was that it felt real. I’d never had dreams so vivid. And they wouldn’t fade from my memory in the way dreams should do. It was the opposite, in fact. I’d get flashes, more and more, even after I’d woken up, as if I was remembering something that had really happened to me. Well, I was terrified of going back to that place… so cold, so lonely, so I avoided you. Until that day when you were looking for Estela… that night I dreamed it all again, but this time, I kept dreaming… and you rescued me. You… your friends, some other people I recognised and knew I knew… but it was you, clear as day. It was then that I realised that I need never be afraid of you; whatever these dreams -or are they memories?- whatever they’re trying to tell me, I knew you’d understand, that you’d want to help me.”

Her mouth dry, Taylor struggled to find the words. “We’ve all had dreams like that. Estela, Diego, Zahra… I’m sure the others have too.” She automatically glanced back to the dance floor, to where Sean, Michelle, Raj and Craig were laughing together. They had to be remembering something by now. “And I think, I mean, I know… they’re memories. Of a life we should have shared. I know it sounds crazy-“

“It does,” said Grace steadily. “I wouldn’t have believed it if I hadn’t seen them myself. I kept on dreaming, you see. It was though I’d passed through a barrier and the memories could suddenly reach me. I kept a journal beside my bed, and wrote down everything I saw, everything I felt.” She gave a bashful smile. “I was very close to Aleister, wasn’t I? I’ve been too nervous to speak to him when I see him in classes, but sometimes our eyes will meet and something so happy bubbles up inside me.”

Taylor could scarcely dare to believe what she was hearing. Grace, her gentle, brilliant Grace, had opened that wonderful mind of hers and seen the truth of everything. With a weak laugh, Taylor nodded. “Yes, you and Aleister. You were such a pair. He so badly needed someone like you in his life. Do you… do you remember what happened?”

The relief that she was not, in fact, losing her mind showed on Grace’s face. The final pieces of the puzzle fell into place. “It was Everett Rourke, wasn’t it? He used technology beyond anything ever seen before… he used it to unravel time itself, to bend it to his will. It’s why he’s the Emperor today. Taylor… it’s all true? Everything I’ve seen in my head? My friends… our friends?”

“It’s true,” Taylor confirmed, voice hushed and threatening to crack with emotion. A tear fell from her cheek. “You’re a hero, Grace. Fighting to save the world. There was so much we could have never done without you.” She choked back a sob. “I’ve missed you so much…”

“I’ve missed you too. When it all started to come back, I felt so empty, like I’d been missing something important. All this time it was you… all of you…” Suddenly, she simultaneously laughed and spluttered with tears, and pulled Taylor into a tight hug. Not only was she not going crazy, she had friends… friends who appreciated exactly who she was, who’d put their lives on the line to see her safe. Frightening as those dreams had been, they’d also shown a kind of love she’d silently craved for as long as she could remember. “Oh my gosh, Taylor!”

They embraced, laughing and crying, sheer relief that their friendship was a fire that for all Rourke’s efforts, could not be extinguished. As Grace came away, lines of worry returned to her face.

“Most of us still haven’t remembered…” she said quietly. “Rourke… he’s treated time as his plaything, hurt so many people, and he’s just… getting away with it?”

Taylor placed her hands on Grace’s shoulders, and leant down just a little, so that she was eye-to-eye with the shorter woman. “He won’t. I swear to you, he won’t. This time, we’re not racing an apocalypse. I’m not saying it’ll be easy, but… look at us. Back together; and Estela, Diego, Zahra… that’s already shown that we are so much stronger than he bargained for. I’ve gotta trust that the rest will come in time. And when the time comes, we’ll finish this. For good.”

There was something in the way she spoke that made Grace feel like it was possible. “When this is all over, you really ought to consider a career in motivational speaking.”

“We’ll see. First, let’s enjoy tonight, yeah? Like I said, you’ve earned it.”

__________________________________

“So, um… dancing?” Estela took Quinn’s hand and swayed awkwardly. Wait- she’s seasick! That’s not gonna help. Shit. Her cheeks suddenly bright red, she stopped in her tracks. There’s gotta be a way of doing this without making poor Quinn barf…

Quinn laughed. She was utterly intrigued by the brunette, who was clearly putting herself out of her comfort zone… for her… as if she really was a friend. When she thought about it, Quinn realised where she’d seen Estela before… the strangest dream. She was reaching out to a frothing sea monster, a great beast that towered over her… willing an object to rise out from its throat. And there, arms securely around her, holding her out of harm’s way… Estela. It was funny; she could almost feel those strong arms embracing her, as if it were a memory of something as real as she was standing there. What was even stranger was that she was certain she’d seen Michelle’s face too, in that very same dream.

“Dry land has done me some good; I’m up for a little dancing. Michelle?”

Still side-eyeing Estela, Michelle took Quinn’s hand. Something about this was familiar; spookily so. As much as she couldn’t admit to going along with Taylor’s crazy… there had been flashes of a different truth coming to her since they’d violently collided several weeks before. She’d fought it. Whatever madness Taylor had planted in her head was a distraction from what mattered; she had it all- the sorority, Sean, and she was killing it in classes. Everything right on track. She was still scared of Estela. Not because she was some creepy figure that the other girls would nervously giggle about, but because she was all that, and still Michelle couldn’t shake the growing urge to slap every idiot who said a word against her. It was the same thing that made her protective of Quinn; a deep knowing that she couldn’t understand. None of it made any sense. But, no. This was just a dance… hanging out with a sick girl. What the hell kind of doctor would she be if she didn’t show compassion for someone who clearly needed her? That was all this was, of that much Michelle was certain; she’d keep Quinn company, and at the end of it all, she could go back to keeping her distance… keeping the crazy, the madness that could throw everything she’d worked for into shambles, safely at arm’s length.

“If it means I can make sure you don’t over-do it…” Michelle started to bounce along to the music, and tentatively reached for Estela’s hand. The calloused palm was slightly rough in her fingers, the grip returned to her was strong yet gentle. This was all for show, she told herself, but still she found herself offering the dark-eyed brunette an encouraging smile. “I know this isn’t exactly your scene either. Just follow my lead, okay?”

It was awkward at first. Both Estela and Michelle gratefully took several opportunities to grab a drink between songs, loosening them up just enough that they could forget that they were supposed to be strangers. Reluctantly, though, Michelle found herself having fun- laughing even. She wasn’t sure when it happened, but at some point she must have stopped flinching away from Estela, and her companionship was suddenly… easy.

While she twirled Quinn around, Estela remained quiet. This was well beyond her comfort zone… it would have been even if her friends remembered their relationship. Quinn was bubbly and bouncy, and Estela simply wasn’t. Her slightly tipsy party-goer self was far more self-conscious, stilted, than the average drunken student. Life had taught her to keep her guard up. But as Quinn took both her and Michelle by the hand and spun them in a wild circle, Estela was enjoying herself so much more than she knew how to show them. But that look on Quinn’s face, that look that was like sunshine breaking through the clouds, it was enough to tell her that she wasn’t doing too badly.

Some twenty or so songs later, Quinn collapsed onto the bench, her face happily flushed, sweat upon her brow. She’d pushed herself, perhaps harder than she should have done, but the reward had been what she’d missed out on for so long- a genuine human connection. It had, however, knocked the stuffing out of her.

“Wow, I’m wrecked.” She put her hand to her head, the troubling ache still present in intermittent twinges. It was bizarre, the strength of the complaint seemingly linked to feelings of closeness to the two women who’d put their own plans aside, for her. “Good wrecked,” she added quickly.

“Honestly?” Michelle sighed, sitting down beside her. “Me too. It’s almost like I caught your headache. I think exam week caught up with me.” It wasn’t the night she’d planned, but of all the parties she’d been to in her freshman year, this was the one she’d remember. “Hey, Quinn? If you wanted to share an Uber with me, you could crash out in my room. If you wanted to hang out some more?”

Her sapphire eyes widening at the first invite she’d received in… how many years?... Quinn couldn’t hide her surprise. “Oh, Michelle, you don’t have to. You should spend some time with your friends, I’ve kept you a long time as it is.”

“This isn’t me being nice. I don’t wanna go back in there and face Craig right now; my head would explode.”

Both Quinn and Estela laughed.

Michelle found herself grinning along with them. “And Quinn, you’re a friend. Shit- maybe I am being nice. What a night.” She offered Estela a glance. “I’m guessing you’re here with…” Crazy Taylor… “Taylor?”

“I am. I didn’t think you’d appreciate it if I called her over after… you know.”

Her cheeks suddenly very pink, Michelle was uncomfortable, and it showed all over her face. The last encounter she’d shared with Taylor and Estela had been memorable for all the wrong reasons. There may have been a slap-fight involved. She said nothing, but gave a small nod of acknowledgement that Estela had probably made the right call. The more she’d thought about it, the less Crazy Taylor seemed like a threat to her relationship with Sean, but it remained she who was the source of those insane stories, the ones that somehow haunted Michelle in her dreams. Bad news… that’s what Taylor was. But Estela seemed nice enough; creepy as all hell, but honestly… nice. Certainly not deserving of being treated like something slimy that had crawled out of a horror movie. How she, Michelle, had treated her.

Quinn put her arms around Estela, receiving an unsure, but clearly heartfelt hug in return. “You’re here with your girlfriend? I wouldn’t have kept you if I’d known!”

“It’s all right. You needed a friend. Taylor would get it; this sort of thing is usually what she’d do.”

“Wait- blonde Taylor?” Receiving a nod, Quinn beamed. “I know Taylor! Whenever I’m on campus and she bumps into me, she’ll stop and chat- every time.”

“That sounds right.” Estela couldn’t help but smile. Being a stellar friend was pretty much what Taylor was born for, and it was where she shone. It was a good thing, too, what with the fate of the world relying on their rekindling the bonds the twelve had once shared. “She’s got this pathological need to be friends with people. She latches on, and that’s it, she’ll care about you for life.”

It had been strange for Estela to take on that role. She hoped she’d risen to the challenge; it wasn’t like old times, but she’d felt comfortable with Quinn and Michelle, refreshingly so. “I should get back to her. She’s probably propping up a drunk Diego somewhere…”

“I think I’ve kept you long enough,” Quinn said, gratefully. She wasn’t sure what it was about Estela, but so quickly, the friendship that was blooming between them felt easy, natural. For the first time in her life, a friendship that might just have a chance… a chance of growing and not simply being snuffed out by the reality of her illness. “You say ‘hi’ for me, okay? We should all hang out sometime.”

Estela looked her steadily in the eye, her cheeks slightly pink. That someone would actively seek out her company… it was surreal. She could only hope Quinn knew what it meant. “I’d like that. Thank you. And I… I will.” She gave them both a small nod. “Get some rest, yeah?”

With that, she turned to head back to the boat, back to her wife, who would no doubt be wondering after her. She felt a hand on the crook of her arm, and when she looked back, there was Michelle, a bizarre expression on her face… as if surprised by her own action.

“Look, Estela, I don’t often make apologies; I’m sharp, and it’s how I survive. But I was a real bitch to you; you and Taylor. I’m sorry, all right? And you can pass that on to her too.”

“…Michelle…”

Michelle looked up, but still pointedly avoided eye contact, not realising how much it stung.

“Thanks…” Estela said, “you know, for helping keep Quinn company.”

“I’m not a complete asshole.” Michelle glanced upwards, meeting brunette’s dark, serious eyes at last, and gave her a small but genuine smile. “You’re welcome.”

_______________________________

In the middle of the dance floor, Taylor was hopping to the beat, a great smile plastered across her face. She was supposed to be going for top-ups, leaving Grace and Diego to briefly carry on their giggly game of charades without her… but how could she stop herself from dancing? Sure, she didn’t have the whole gang behind her, but buzzed as she was over the breakthrough with Grace, the usual hurt couldn’t touch her. Taylor was on cloud nine, on top of the world…

-crash!!-

“Heeeey, Crazy Taylor!”

Looking up from the floor on what she knew would be a very bruised rear the next day, Taylor held her hand out, letting herself be pulled back to her feet by the very solid figure she’d danced right into.

“Hey, Craig, having a good time? Sorry about that, by the way.”

“Pffft, chyeah… it’s a party, duh!”

“I can’t argue with that,” Taylor laughed. This felt good, natural. Or was she just drunk? Was Craig just hoping she’d start another entertaining fight? Her nerves returned. Easy, Taylor. Just let it come the way it’s meant to. He’s your friend; he’ll work it out eventually. “Food’s been pretty nice too…”

“Hey, where did your friend go? She hasn’t bailed already?”

Taylor followed Craig’s eyes to the seat where Zahra had been sitting earlier that night, glaring daggers out into the room while downing the finest cocktails on offer. A sinking feeling in her stomach told her that Zahra had indeed left. Immediately, she felt guilt. Caught up as she was in her excitement over re-connecting with Grace, she hadn’t checked in with her reclusive housemate. Zahra was hurt, much more than she cared to let on, by her history with Craig having been erased. It had been excruciating for her to open back up to him on La Huerta… to start over was too much.

“I think she went home,” Taylor said apologetically. This, she knew, would be one of the major hurdles in getting the group back together. As soon as Craig had started looking her way, Zahra had scarpered.

Craig’s face fell, but he recovered quickly. “I’m not, like, interested or anything! Not into nerds.”

“Come on, really? And you haven’t ever played a video game in your life? Between you and me, I’ve always found I was happier when I just rolled with what made me happy, not what might make me popular--“

“The hell you mean by that? You don’t know me!”

Shit. Abort mission; abort, abort!

Taylor briefly babbled, tripping over her tongue in panic. “I didn’t- I mean that… uh…. Shit. You’re right; I’m over-stepping. But if you wanna try something different, you should drop by our place sometime.”

To her relief, the indignant anger seemed to have faded from Craig’s face as quickly as it had flared up there, replaced by simple… curiosity, even in spite of himself.

Taking a chance, Taylor kept talking. “Yeah… yeah. We picked up a few old games last week, you know, retro… and honestly? I keep getting thrashed by Zahra. Y-you know… my friend you were asking after. She’s wicked smart; way too much for me to handle. And I dunno… I thought maybe you could help me take her down. Diego’s crap, and Estela’s plain not interested. I know it’s weird to ask, but I just got a feeling… you might have a good mind for that kind of thing.”

“Huh. Uh, uh, okay.” His face taking on a pink glow, Craig glanced hastily over his shoulder. “No nerdy wizard quest shit, though, aiight?”

“What, no! It’s uh… ‘Deadly Bloodsport’. And like I said, I keep getting my ass handed to me. You really should come around, bring a few beers or something.”

The strange nervousness fell from Craig’s face. “Now you’re talking! Why didn’t you say there was gonna be booze?”

Okay; good, good, now you’ve just got to track down one of those damn consoles… and hope that Zahra doesn’t stab me in my sleep.

As Craig walked away, Taylor realised she’d been barely breathing through their whole encounter, so terrified she was that she’d put her foot in it and make a difficult situation even worse. She chuckled to herself. Go let your hair down, girl! This is meant to be a night off from freaking out.

And, for the most part, it was. Taylor couldn’t remember the last time she’d laughed so much, but it must have been back on La Huerta. It was almost as if… she’d stopped worrying just enough that things were starting to fall together on their own. She had her old Grace back, sweet and smart, and the friend she’d always been. And she could have sworn she saw something clicking in Craig’s head back there! The night, by her reckoning, was a roaring success. Something, though, something was missing…

“Estela-baby! There’s that badass love of my life!” Taylor leapt into a run, losing one of her heels in her exuberant rush to put herself in her wife’s arms. “I thought you’d fallen overboard or something! You haven’t missed all the food, have you?”

Estela was pleasantly flushed, glowing. “Sorry, I got caught up. I did eat though. Quinn was feeling rough on the boat, so I kept her and Michelle company on the marina for a little while. They’ve gone back to Hartfeld now, but I think having something to eat did Quinn some good.”

Doing a double-take, Taylor blinked rapidly for a moment. The last time Estela had been in contact with Michelle had been an absolute disaster. That look on her face now said that something had drastically changed. Taylor could only smile at her, big and broad and adoring.

“Estela Montoya, you are an absolute gem, you know that?”

She trailed her hands down until they settled on Estela’s hips, and pulled her closer, swaying gently in time with the music.

Smiling, Estela put her arms around Taylor’s neck. She leaned in and kissed her, letting feel of her lover’s lips, soft on her own, make the rest of the world fall away. The party was nice and all, but it didn’t compare to this- not even close. “Did you want to dance?”

“Is that something you do? Dancing?”

“No.” Estela shrugged. “Not really. But I figured we could work it out together. Is, um, one of us supposed to lead?”

“I think so? I don’t…”

They both stepped forward at the same time, and giggled as they crashed foreheads.

“God, you’ve got a hard skull…” Taylor laughed. “Hang on…” Tossing away her other shoe, she noticed that Estela was already barefoot, clearly having done away with the impractical heels at first opportunity. It made her smile all the more. “How about, you just lean into me, hold me… we’ll sway a little bit… and then…” She guided Estela’s arm upwards guiding her into a spin until she was flush against her chest once more.

“I guess we’re not so bad at this.”

“At least now we’re not. Helps that I’m not waddling around with one shoe like a complete doofus anymore.”

“You wanted to wear the stupid things…” Estela rolled her eyes. “You know, if you had to make a quick exit in these, you’d break your neck.”

Taylor raised an eyebrow. “And you can run in heels? Oh, my darling, even walking in them you look like a drunk giraffe. Sorry, a simultaneously very cute and very intimidating drunk giraffe.”

“Uh… thanks…?” Estela leaned in close and nibbled her lover’s ear before whispering. “I think you know that when the shit hits the fan, I’d have the heels off and be stabbing someone in the neck with them in a heartbeat.”

“There it is. Adorable and terrifying. So glad I’m on your good side.”

Estela giggled against the crook of Taylor’s neck, warm and giddy. “Always.”

Her arm resting on her wife’s back, Taylor grinned like a Cheshire cat, all the while, still swaying gently to the music. These little moments made the angst, the heartache, the fear… all worth it. A hundred times over.

“This has been really nice. Like, so nice. But I’ve actually got something to tell you.”

Immediately, Estela looked up, worry creeping into her eyes. “Taylor, is something wrong?”

Taylor kept on smiling. “I was talking with Grace. She remembers. Stel, she remembers everything!”

“Wait- what? You took your time spitting that out! Where is she? Is she okay?”

“Well, I figured, we’d all be hanging out together the rest of the night. I wanted to have a moment… just us, first.”

“Oh my god!”

“I left her playing charades with Diego… they’re probably wondering where I got to with their drinks. Come on…”

“I love you, but I am not playing charades. How fucking drunk do you think I am?”

_______________________________

Several giggly rounds of charades later- and Diego remaining undefeated, seemingly able to pick a mimed pop-culture reference within two seconds- Taylor succumbed once more to the dance floor, swinging her friends around her until her feet could dance no longer. Several drinks down, and all four of them were feeling it. Perhaps too much- as they discovered when an over-excited Diego ran up behind Sean and gave him the biggest hug he could muster, too tipsy to recall that in this timeline, they weren’t actually friends yet. Rescued by Estela before he could inflict another social faux pas, Diego was thankful that even in the midst of a scornful popular crowd, Sean’s good nature shone through and he’d awkwardly returned the gesture.

Grace was more relaxed, at ease with the world and within herself, than Taylor could remember seeing her- perhaps ever; the relief she found in realising her truth clear to see. She’d kept an eye out for Aleister; but he never made an appearance. Taylor had explained that it might have been for the best; Aleister was kept just close enough to his father that it was safer they all kept their distance until the rest of them were ready to come together and take action. Everything taken into consideration, though, this was the nearest Taylor had felt to… to feeling whole since she stupidly allowed Rourke to take away the bonds that had been the making of her. When Grace hugged her, it was to be embraced by a friend… and damn, that felt better than Taylor could put into words.

“I’m absolutely exhausted!” Grace lamented, even as she kept on grinning. “I’d better go and get some sleep; I’m still on catch-up after exams.”

Taylor hugged her in return. “Trust me, you’re not the only one. I think if I dance for a minute longer, my feet will sue my brain.”

“You say the strangest things, Taylor. And yet, somehow, you always make sense.” Grace spoke with a laugh, one well-earned after running herself ragged in the lead-up to the end of the quarter. “I suppose I’ll see you when school comes back? We ought to have lunches together… I’m honestly so tired of feeling like I’m struggling through alone.”

Taking a step back, Taylor held onto Grace’s arms and looked her straight in the eye, hoping with everything in her that she understood just how much she was cared for. “You don’t have to go through it alone. Never again, yeah? Because we’re a family. Whatever happens, we’re in it together.”

Grace’s eyes glistened with tears as she held her friend’s gaze. Her smile was brilliant, her face aglow. “We’re in it together! I’ll see you very soon, Taylor.”

Another round of hugs, and Grace was gone, almost skipping as she went to get her lift. With Diego calling up their own ride, Taylor gleefully put her arms around Estela. She’d hoped the party would have been an opportunity for some long slow-dances between them, a chance for her to simply hold her wife, and let her feel at ease- something so rare when her very mind was at war with itself- but surprise encounters had put paid to her best laid plans.

“I feel like I hardly spent any time with you tonight;” Estela murmured, as if she were reading her wife’s mind. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be- as much as I might want to keep you to myself, I’m a very kind and giving person.” Taylor reached out for Estela’s hand. “Seriously, though. I know how hard all this has been for you. To reach out to them, after everything, and being your wonderful, caring self… I just love you so much.”

With her free hand, Estela traced her fingers over the side of Taylor’s face, delicately brushing away an errant lock of hair. She quietly admired the pink glow that had painted itself across those kissable cheeks, the contentment and affection in those blue, blue eyes, the enticing glisten upon those lips.

“You’re beautiful…” she whispered. “Taylor… beautiful Taylor.”

“You’re beautiful, my darling Estela.”

Glancing down, a little bashful, Estela moved in closer, nuzzling against Taylor’s cheek. The skin so silky soft, shifting beneath her lips in what she knew was the formation of a sweet smile, the kind that made her knees buckle.

“Do you think, when it’s over… we’ll do more of this?” she asked, softly. “Not just ‘cause we’ve got to get some kind of escape from the mindfuck that is our lives, but just… for the joy of it.”

“So, you like the dancing?”

“With you, yes. But you can stop smirking. You already knew I wasn’t so hard.”

“True, very true. And, yeah, we’ll do more of this. Dancing like we haven’t got a care, because someday soon the fight will only be a memory. We’ll be, like, insufferably happy. And we’ll get there, soon. I can feel it.”

“Taylor, you’re feeling the champagne.”

Maybe she was feeling it herself, but Estela couldn’t quite extinguish the new spark of hope that had ignited within, nor could she suppress the beaming smile that had painted itself across her face. She put an arm around Taylor’s back, hugging her tight to her chest, so that she could feel her heart pounding with exhilaration against her breast. To hold her was magic, plain and simple. She leaned in, parting Taylor’s lips with her own, tasting the slight bitterness left by the wine. The kiss started slow, tender, every smallest brush and press of their lips savoured, held onto as if sacred, before it deepened, both women powerless in the face of the heat and passion that surged between them.

Estela drew her face away, just a little, so she could gaze upon the woman she loved. In Taylor’s eyes was something like aching longing, as though mere inches between them was too much to bear. She sated her with delicate kisses, trailing from her forehead, back to her eager mouth.

“Hey, you guys!!!” came a ringing holler.

“Ugh,” said Taylor. “Rude.”

“Don’t worry, carińa, we’ll pick this up when we get home. I’m sure I can keep myself awake for another hour. For you.”

“For me?” Taylor giggled, and snaked an arm around her wife’s waist, holding her close as they reluctantly began moving to join Diego in the Uber back to the apartment. She felt a kiss pressed tenderly to her temple, lingering and sweet. It would have to be just enough… for the time being at least.

Estela reluctantly left one last kiss against Taylor’s face. “Come on,” she said, suddenly commanding. “The sooner we get home…” A subtle wiggle of her eyebrows was all it took to kick Taylor’s butt into gear.

They hurried, hand-in-hand, revelling in the rare assurance that in their small way, they were on their way to winning.

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