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#I have so much more anxiety about it this time
emmyrosee · 8 hours
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Imagine having a kid with Sukuna and him urging you to have a day out after giving birth and taking care of the baby so you can have a fun stress free day with friends, and then him having a daddy daughter date. I thought it’s cute 🥰
oh… oh you KNOW HOW I FEEEEEEEEL ABOUT A DAD!AU (bro this got so long im sO SORRY-)
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“Okay, there’s three bottles of milk in the fridge.”
“Okay.”
“And her melts are in the cabinet!”
“I know, I live here too.”
“Oh! And her stuffed lamb is her favorite to nap with-“
“Babe,” Sukuna laughs, wrapping an arm around you. In his other arm, Akiara is held securely, with an arm under her thighs to keep her perched against his chest, the pacifier in her mouth bouncing as she rattles a small toy in her hands. “I got this. It’ll be fine.”
“Okay, but if you need me, call me.”
“I’m not going to call you. Go have fun,” he encourages. Deep down, he knows you’re terrified to leave the baby with anyone for more than 15 minutes, always keeping her in close proximity and within earshot. The farthest you’ve gone is to shower while Sukuna indulges with tummy time, and it seems that every time, you’re surprised the house hasn’t crumbled in the brief period.
But Akiara is five months now. And your friends begged you to come shopping with them, missing you from outings with the group. Sukuna knows you trust him implicitly, but your separation anxiety is physically felt in the air this point. He pulls you in for a hug and presses a kiss to the crown of your head, “go. If the house catches on fire, I’ll call you. Otherwise, I can handle a few hours with my own spawn.” You tense slightly, and he offers you a stern look, “do you trust me?”
“Of course I do, but-“
“Then let me take care of everything. Go.”
You offer him a shaky sigh and make your way over to Akiara in his arms, “mommy loves you so much, okay?” You whisper. She babbles and grabs your hair, and Sukuna can see the nervous tears welling up. “I’ll be home in two hours tops.”
“Don’t time yourself,” he chuckles. “Go with your girlfriends. I gave you the credit card, go buy some clothes, or a necklace, or those expensive ass pastries you love so much.” Then, he nods his head towards the door, “scram. Before you cry your mascara off.”
“Okay,” you sigh. “Okay-“ you blow them both a few kisses as you slowly make your way to the door, “I love you both so much. Behave. Oh, and nap time is at 1:30-“
“Babe. Go,” he snickers. He watches as you open the door and walk backwards out, your eyes focused on the two of them until the door shuts fully, keeping you outside and them on the inside. Sukuna sighs in relief and he adjusts Akiara to be held arms length, “you, stinky girl, need a bath,” he hums, and when the little girl coos, he brings her tiny body up to his mouth to playfully bite her chubby belly, hiccupy laughter filling the air briefly before he pulls a face of disgust and holds her back out. “Yeah. You stink. Like a lot.”
Sukuna wastes no time in setting up her bathtub and cleansing the tiny child with her soaps, letting her splash the warm water for some time until she reaches up for him. He barely gets her out of the tub and into a towel before his phone buzzes wildly. He sighs and answers it, “do I have to block your number?”
“No!” You whine. “I just wanted to see how things were going. I just got to the restaurant, wanted to make sure everything was okay before I ate.”
“Well the dog got out, I broke a vase and our kid went to college, so not great,” he says flatly, and when you huff in annoyance, and smirks, “everything is fine. She just had a bath, I’m trying to dry her off, and then we’re going to watch some of those dancing fruits she likes so much. Goodbye.”
“Wait- you bathed her before you fed her?” You ask.
He pulls his mouth into a straight line, “yes. Because she smelt like shit fart-“
“Sukuna!” You snap.
“If I have to bathe her again, I will. It’s not the end of the world,” he tries to soothe. When you click your tongue he chuckles again. “Okay. Goodbye.”
“Goodbye,” you say, ending the phone call. He pockets the device and looks down at his child. “Shes your mother alright,” he says. His daughter merely babbles and chews on her fingers. He gets her settled into a clean diaper before hoisting her back and onto his hip, making his way to the living room, resting her on his massive stomach and clicking on the TV for some entertainment. There’s a baseball game on, surely you won’t mind if he indulges while his baby lays on his chest.
The colors are good stimulation.
“Who you got money on?” He asks Akiara, who blinks eyes like yours up at him. When she smiles a gummy smile, he shrugs, “I don’t know. They’ve got a really good pitcher.” His thick fingers gently stroke up and down her spine, so gently and warm that he feels Akiara’s breathing slowly even out, his little girl falling asleep on his chest. He winces, he knows you’re not going to be thrilled about an early nap time, but who the hell is he to wake a sleeping baby?
A sleeping baby who sleeps for hours. You’re going to be pissed at him.
By the time the game is over, Akiara is still fast asleep on his chest, tiny hands balled into fists as her long lashes lay on her cheeks. Sukuna’s gotta give you credit, you haven’t called or texted since her bath, and now it’s well into four hours since you’ve left and you’re still out with your friends. He’s proud of you.
He’s not sure how long in total Akiara was sleeping for, but not long after the game, she slowly twitches awake, eyes fluttering open before fixating on him. He watches fondly as her body slowly wakes up, starting with her sleepy eyes that blink open, followed by her mouth which opens to let out the smallest yawn.
“Good morning, sleepy girl,” he hums, gently cradling the back of her head. “Was that a good nap?” Akiara merely thunks her head back against his chest in response. He kisses her head softly before standing up, shuffling to the kitchen to grab one of the prepared bottles from the fridge. He pops it in her mouth, where her tiny fists assist him in holding it. The child drinks the milk happily, wide eyes blinking as she downs the beverage hungrily. He smirks, “definitely my kid.”
With that, you come home.
He can tell by the jingling of keys you’re trying to hurry in as fast as possible, and he snickers at your struggle. Once the door finally creaks open, you haul your bags into the home and kick the door shut, smiling as your eyes land on your little family. “Hey you.”
“What’s up?” He hums, kissing you as you get close. “How was it?”
“It was great!” You squeal, and he can’t fight the way his heart squeezes at your excitement. “I got some new dresses, a pair of heels, some perfumes- oh, and I got you a cologne-“
“That’s my girl,” he says, but he can tell your attention is focused on the small girl he’s currently burping, and he shrugs, “you want to take over?”
When you nod sheepishly, he gently passes Akiara over to you, and you coo down at her, “hi, Mumma’s girl,” you coo, and she burps loudly in your face. “Well excuse you!”
Sukuna can’t fight the laughter that barks from his throat, snickers tearing through until you’re smiling and shaking your head, and he pulls you in for another hug.
He loves that his small family fits in his arms.
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honeytonedhottie · 24 hours
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maintaining/creating a social life⋆.ೃ࿔*:・🧁
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ok so i used to have HORRIBLE social anxiety and i think that the contrast between me with social anxiety and me now is INSANE. in a good way ofc. so im not going to talk about how i overcame social anxiety, instead im going to talk about how i created a social life ✨
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MAKING FRIENDS ;
the science of making friends is simple and im about to explain it. so go to where there are ppl that u can relate to/want to relate to. example being school, clubs, etc.
next, observe who u want to befriend and make sure to start with a compliment. starting off by introducing urself just makes for an awkward conversation but starting with a compliment puts u and the other party at ease.
something thats rly important is ur CHARISMA and ur magnetic energy so be CHARMING ✨ if u find that the other party is not reciprocating its either they're uncomfy, uninterested, or just a weirdo. and in all cases, you should stop.
MAKING FRIENDS THRU FRIENDS ;
make friends with your friends friends -> make friends with their friends -> and so on and so forth. this is how you network and create a friendly status with lots of people.
if ur in a school setting like i am, make friends with people in ur own grade or in a higher up grade, i dont usually make friends with ppl in lower grades but ofc there are always exceptions.
making friends through friends is how u get invited to parties, have more opportunities be available to you, and ofc network for more connections. guys connections are literally EVERYTHING.
MAKE TIME FOR UR FRIENDS ;
make sure to learn who u call friends. when is their birthday? do they have specific preferences? what kind of music do they listen to? knowing ur friends makes them feel special and thats how u learn to be a good friend. i can make a whole POST about being a good friend cuz i've learned and grown so much with that.
THE POWER OF A COMPLIMENT ;
make it ur mission to give a compliment everyday cuz first off, being nice is HOT so pls be nice and second of all, if ur trying to talk to someone and u start with a compliment i promise that it'll go so much better.
if ur thinking "thats so awkward how will i do that" then the category dont be shy is one that u gotta read cuz girl 💀. if u need an example i'll provide one from my own experience so u can see the power of a compliment.
there was this girl in my spanish class and i always thought that she was so pretty and she seemed so nice. one day we bump into each other in the bathroom and i compliment her hair and makeup, she responds well. we continue to have friendly interactions throughout the rest of the school year and now we are good friends on and off campus.
DONT BE SHY ;
when u make friends please please PLEASE work on ur confidence first. you need to be SURE of yourself. if not, when ur being friendly it could come off as desperation and ppl will humiliate, make fun of and take advantage of u. and thats NOT hot.
be CONFIDENT, you literally have nothing to lose. when u shed ur shyness (thru things like exposure therapy etc) a whole new world is opened up for u bcuz sometimes the only thing holding u back is urself and ur limiting beliefs about urself.
MAKE UR PERSONALITY SHINE ;
make sure that know ur own personality and from knowing that u can find ways in which u can make it shine. no matter what ur personality is though, something that i cannot stress enough is BE NICE.
be friendly and amicable with everyone and stay out of drama and if drama comes to you then stay unbothered 😭. dont try and uproot ur own personality to copy someone else's.
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penny-for-thots · 3 days
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[!] POSSESSIVE SUO. hcs. f!reader + yandere-ish and spicy-ish content?. he's ... yeah ; i promise its okay lmfao. i saw a togame one, so ofc i had to do my man. this is a lowk long hc list ...
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hayato is the type to be extremely possessive of his friends, but he's so good at hiding it that no one can tell. if need be, he's ready to act like a snap of a finger, though more times than not, knowing his friends well enough, they have the situation under control.
hence, based on that, he's pretty (secretly) possessive over you pre-relationship. he's likely more so because you're a girl. not in a 'you're weaker,' way but more of 'i can't trust them around you' way.
hayato suo has a slick tongue.
he knows what to say, and when to say it. after all, the emotional intelligence he has is through the roof for someone of his age. at times it scares you how accurate his observations of you. often times, he notices things leagues before you do.
"you are aware that guy is flirting with you right?"
"unless you want the others to get a negative impression of you, i'd fix your expression."
"she's nervous, say something to help her relax."
specifically the first example, countlessly.
hayato suo is not a jealous person, after all, he's not dating you, how could he be jealous? though, there's something that pisses him off about those guys that approach you.
all of them were either sleazy or borderline misogynistic.
the first time you told him you were going on a date he almost burst a blood vessel.
it was at this point that suo realized he would have to do a bit more than the things he was doing to catch your attention: feigning injuries, "forgetting" his accessories around you, subtly purchasing things you enjoy, etc.
essentially, he was a boyfriend before he officially became one.
and even as you date, his shenanigans don't decrease. in fact, it increases. albeit, in a way you can't exactly point out.
instead of a dumb keychain or little figure he sometimes bought, he'd bring stuffed animals, necklaces, books, rings. the jewelry is always a matching set. he needs to let others know that the both of you are taken. you are a pretty girl, he has to stand his ground.
speaking of standing his ground, specifically in a fighting sense. he is always ready to through hands at someone for you.
someone is causing you anxiety? insults you? heaven forbid they assault you?
that time he had to be pulled away from mauling that dude? yeah ...
he'll through hands quickly if the disagreement can't be settled with words.
another way he proves being possessive, in a bot so subtle way, he'll leave small hickey's right where the line of your shirt sat. sure, they didn't show at the present moment, but you move the wrong way and anyone could see the way your lower neck and collarbone are littered in hickeys.
he's also a man to be alright with PDA. he's not too keen on too intimate activities, though small kisses and hand holding is his favorite thing to do.
(though he's not opposed to making out with you, biting and sucking on your bottom lip so when you go out it's kiss-swollen)
suo kisses the back of your hand and treats you like a princess while he's glaring at some poor unsuspecting man.
he's legitimately so happy to have you as a girlfriend. if they didn't know already, he's eager to introduce you, but if you wish to take it slow he will.
i mean he's also the type to ask you to cover his face in your lipstick via kisses.
having a possessive side to him, he loves seeing when yours decides to debut. he doesn't purposefully intend to make you jealous, but he couldn't exactly be rude.
he finds it cute when you have that huffy expression on your face, he'd annoy you as much as possible just to see a face like that.
adding on to material things he covers you in, he loves to see you in his clothes. the first time he saw you in one of his shirts, he almost lost it. instead of saying the ... things, he wanted to say, he decided to hug you from behind with a little tease about the situation, hoping you wouldn't feel something presses against your back.
i am severely sleep as it is 1:14 am, so in short, his possessiveness doesn't present in a way that you'd be able to point it out. others seem to point it out at times, but overall, he does normal boyfriend stuff but with ulterior methods of keeping you all to himself. he throughout enjoys your company and love, no one can take that away from him.
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alltheirdamn · 3 days
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Killing Me Softly | (Joel x teacher!f!reader)
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Chap. 9 Act 1, Scene 1
Summary: Time passes, but the memories remain. Rating: 18+ Word Count: 6.7k Warnings: **THIS CONTAINS SERIES SPOILERS** angst, language, mentions of alcohol, brief mention of vomiting (tw for anyone with emetophobia), slight duel pov A/N: Well... the imposter syndrome has hit me HARD. I'm extremely discouraged by this chapter, but i hope its a decent enough follow-up to what y'all read last :/ bear with me, the last two chapters will MORE than make up for it. i promise.
Masterlist | Ko-fi
Time didn’t exist anymore. 
You woke up. You went to work. You came home.
Over and over, the cycle went, and the days passed with no significance. You didn’t eat much, your appetite dwindling just as much as your motivation. It started to show in the way your clothes hung on your body and how your face thinned out. If you cared, you would go to the store and actually buy food, but the possibility of running into Joel kept you away. 
Joel.
Two weeks had passed since parent-teacher conferences—two weeks since you had hidden the book far away. You considered re-writing your lesson plans for next year; you never wanted to teach Romeo and Juliet again. You weren’t strong enough to analyze a story you had shared so intimately with someone you now considered a stranger because that’s what Joel was now: a stranger. A stranger you could still pick out in a crowd of a million people, a stranger whose lips were still imprinted on your skin even after countless hours spent in the shower. 
He was a stranger, and you hated him.
You were perched on the couch with a glass of wine—as most nights went now—when your cell phone buzzed on the coffee table. You didn’t reach for it initially; it was most likely your mom. She had tried calling a handful of times since you had hung up on her weeks ago. You never once called back, but you listened to the voicemails when you were drunk enough. Your dad had been discharged last week and started physical therapy for his hip. Stella and her boyfriend were moving in together somewhere in downtown Boston. And Beth…your mom never once uttered her name. She knew better than to do that. 
But the continuous buzzing of your phone began to irritate you, and you reached for it with an exasperated sigh. An unknown number flashed on the screen, igniting a sudden burst of anxiety inside your chest. Setting your glass down, you inhaled and answered the phone.
“Hello?” You cautioned.
Your name filtered through the receiver, a voice you weren’t expecting to hear.
“Bennett?” 
“Yeah, it’s me,” he sighed. 
“I didn’t think you’d reach out,” you said. “I tried to see you in the hospital, but Natalie…” You let your voice drift off. 
“I know. She’s not big on the idea of talking to you at all.”
“I’m so sorry again, Bennett. Joel shouldn’t have done that. I really don’t understand why it got to that point. I—.”
“I deserved it,” he said, cutting you off mid-sentence. 
You shook your head, your fingers knotting through the tangles in your hair.
“No, Bennett. No, you didn’t. He could have killed you,” you argued.
“He’s a man of his word, I’ll give him that,” he laughed. 
It was odd to hear Bennett talk so casually about this as if Joel hadn’t pummeled him into the ground. He should be mad, so why wasn’t he?
“Should I be waiting for a call from your lawyer soon?” You asked wearily. 
“If I wanted to come after you or Joel legally, I would be the one to do it. But that’s not happening,” he sighed. “It's too messy of a situation, and I really don’t want to go through the hassle. Natalie says otherwise, but she doesn’t really understand the situation.”
“The situation,” you echoed. “Joel told me his side of things after they took you to the hospital.  I still don’t remember anything, Bennett. Even if I did, I wouldn’t have been able to reach you. You left. You disappeared completely and broke my heart.”
There was a beat of silence. You took the opportunity to down the last of your wine, the beginnings of a light buzz coursing through your veins. Don't get angry, you told yourself. You didn’t feel much of anything anymore, but anger was never too far out of reach. Sitting with that emotion and festering in it was easy if you let yourself. Bennett deserved your anger just as much as the rest of them, but you needed answers more than you needed to feel anything.
“There’s a lot to explain,” he finally said. “I’m not sure if you even want to see me again, but I can drive up to Austin this weekend and tell you everything. Or at least everything from my side.”
Seeing Bennett again would unfurl so many unchecked emotions: heartbreak, betrayal, grief. But it would be something you needed. Joel wasn’t the one you were with those two years following the accident; he wasn’t the one you had walked down the aisle expecting to see. Bennett had been with you through it all. You wanted to hear it from his mouth. You wanted an apology and an explanation.
“Okay,” you exhaled. “We can do that. Will Natalie have an issue with it?”
“Natalie won’t know.”
“You’re going to lie to your wife?” You laughed bitterly at his admission. He was still the same person through and through. 
“She’s fine,” he huffed through the phone. “She doesn’t understand any of this anyway.”
“Whatever you say, Bennett. We can meet at a coffee shop this weekend. Don’t abandon me again. I deserve an explanation.”
“I won’t.”
The guilt in his voice was thick, and you relished knowing he was suffering. Everyone, not just you, deserved to suffer for what they did. 
You quickly ended the call with Bennett and returned to the silence surrounding you. Knowing you’d see him in just a few days was unsettling and uncomfortable. The lingering grief he had left still hollowed out your heart. No amount of apologies would fill it, but it could sew up the remaining holes. 
What couldn’t be filled was the gaping hole Joel had left within your heart. Secrets wrapped in scar tissue and carnage that could never be fully healed, and it still infuriated your love for him still festered inside you. It buried itself deep under the confines of your numbness, but sometimes, when you lay awake at night, you could still feel it. You ached for him in growing unbearable ways, but you had to continue with your life. 
You hadn't prepared yourself to see Bennett the first go around, and you had since thrown out the shit still stained with his blood. Now, you were standing amid a pile of clothes strewn around your feet, your hair still wet and wrapped in a towel, and a face that screamed insomnia. You looked beyond amends.
After another hour of procrastination and a ticking timeline, you threw on the most basic T-shirt and jeans and left your hair a wet mess.
It was only Bennett.
It wasn’t serious.
Nothing was these days. 
You pulled into a spot in front of a cafe a little ways into town, your car sitting idle as you stared at the storefront. You could faintly make out Bennett’s silhouette sitting in the window, yet your body wouldn’t move. You were feet from all the answers, but the anxiety bubbling inside you made you immobile. Did you actually want this? Was it better to be blissfully unaware? 
Would the answers hurt you more than help you?
Before the constant questions led you to flee, you opened your door and decided to face the truth. Walking into the cafe, your eyes connected with Bennett, and your heart sank. Even from a distance, the scarring on his face was horrible: a thick, red, jagged line stretching down his temple and ending at his cheekbone. Another raised scar creased his left eyebrow, dragging down the arch over his eye. 
Joel did this. 
Inhaling, you met him at the table, sliding into the chair without a word. Bennett’s lips curled into a smug smile, one you still hated, and his eyes glazed over your body. 
“You look like shit,” he stated. 
“You’re one to talk,” you shot back, rolling your eyes. 
He shrugged, leaning back comfortably in his chair. Your eyes flicked down to the ring on his finger, the gold shimmering through the sunlight hitting the windows. 
“She really has no idea you’re here?” You questioned, nodding your head towards his hand. 
Bennett glanced down at his wedding band, his fingers twisting around the metal mindlessly. 
“No, she doesn’t. She thinks I’m out of town on business.”
“And where’s home for you now?” You asked. “I never really found out since you up and left without a trace.” You tried to swallow the bitterness coating over your words. 
“I live in Houston now. I found a firm seeking out a junior partner and settled down in the city,” he explained. “Trust me, I didn’t want to leave my life here, but it was the only option.”
You studied him momentarily, watching any signs in his body language that would frame him as a liar. But you found nothing to fault. 
“What do you mean it was the only option?”
Bennett leaned forward, intertwining his hands together.
“What exactly did Joel fill you in on?” Bennett asked, cocking an eyebrow.
You shifted in your seat. Bennett’s words hit a nerve inside you, one that was buried deep within the numbness and itching to revive itself on a spark of anger. Was there more Joel had kept from you? How much more heartbreak could you take before you completely withered away?
“He said you and I broke up after we moved to Austin,” you started. “That’s when I met him, and we started dating. I don’t know specifics or much more, but Joel said that when I woke up in the hospital, I asked for you, and that’s when my parents decided to reach out to you and cover up my memory.”
“He left out… a lot,” he emphasized.
“Oh.” 
“So, where do you want me to start then?” 
You chewed on your lip, glancing outside as the cars drove down the main road. If you had told yourself two years ago you’d be sitting in front of your ex-fiance learning about a life you never knew existed… you’d laugh. You’d laugh and tell yourself you’d gone crazy. 
“From the beginning,” you sighed. 
Bennett leaned back in his chair, stretching his arms behind his head. His eye twitched, the tight scar scrunching the skin around it. You averted your eyes, dropping your gaze to your hands as they fidgeted in your lap. 
“Obviously, you remember us moving to Austin,” he started. “It was probably a month or two after that when we started arguing a lot. You were always mad at me for working too much. You complained all the time that I wasn’t present or whatever.” You deadpanned him when he said those words; it was the same as the arguments you remembered during the engagement. Bennett shrugged off your glare and continued. “Anyway, you finally got fed up with everything and called it quits. You moved in with your teacher friend, whatever her name is… I don’t remember.”
“Maria,” you grumbled. “Her name is Maria.”
“Right, yeah.” Bennett quirked a grin as if he knew the buttons he was pushing. “So, you moved in with Maria and must’ve met Joel shortly after that. We didn’t keep in touch during those two years, but I missed you—a lot.”
Now, it was your turn to hit him with a rueful grin. He was so full of shit, just like you remembered. 
“I don’t believe that for a minute,” you scoffed. 
“Believe whatever you want, but I did miss you. Even with all our fights, I loved you,” he admitted. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you, so after a while, I decided to reach out. I asked if we could go to dinner and talk, you know, work things out. I didn’t expect you to agree to it, but you did. And you know what happened? You laughed. You laughed at everything I said. You told me you were finally happy and in love and that you’d never consider the chance of getting back together. You sure do know how to hurt a man's pride.”
“You probably deserved it,” you said, shrinking back into your chair. 
“Yeah, probably,” Bennett exhaled. “Doesn’t matter now, though. Anyway, after dinner, you left, and that’s when the accident happened. I had no idea until your parents called me to the hospital and explained it all to me. Looking back now, I can see how incredibly fucked up it all was, but I wanted a second chance. Joel wasn’t happy with the plan at all. As a matter of fact, he punched the shit out of me right when I walked into the room.”
“What?” You balked. 
Bennett laughed dismissively, running a hand over his jaw. You tracked his moments, imagining what Joel must have looked like when he saw Bennett that night. An unwelcomed pang of guilt swarmed inside your chest, not for Bennett, but for Joel. You still hated him, but you couldn’t image the pain he had felt knowing he was losing you. The guilt subsided as you reminded yourself he had a choice to step in, but he allowed it all to happen anyway. He was an accomplice to your parent’s plans. He didn’t fight for you, and that realization stung. 
“You alright?” he asked, tilting his head to study you. 
“Yeah, I’m fine,” you faltered. “Just—just keep going.”
“Okay,” he cautioned. “I agreed to go along with your parent's plan. I knew it was fucked up, and I knew it would bite everyone in the ass one day, but I did it because I loved you. I wanted a do-over with you, and it felt like the perfect opportunity.”
You nodded slowly, letting his words sink in. If this conversation had happened weeks ago, you would have reacted differently, but there was no anger left to exhaust. You couldn’t be angry at Bennett, at least not for this. You were still allowed to resent him for what he did during the engagement and for leaving you at the altar, but this? This wasn’t something he did; he went along with everything because he loved you…supposedly. That was still arguable. 
“So, you got your perfect opportunity and decided to fuck it up.” 
Bennett inhaled sharply, drawing his lips into a thin line. There he was, the asshole you remembered. He didn’t like when you called him on his shit, and that’s exactly what you were doing. 
“I tried to make it work,” he argued. “I mean, I tried the best I could. I didn’t want to lose you again. So, yeah, I might’ve tried to prevent the chances of you getting your memories back, but it was because I loved you. Then I just got sick of trying. I got sick of you always asking questions and me having to lie. It was exhausting. And then you started saying Joel’s name in your sleep, and I just—.”
“Wait,” you interjected, holding up your hand. “I—I said his name in my sleep?”
Bennett laughed, running a hand over his face. There was a shift in his demeanor, a mixture of anger and sadness. 
“Why do you think I slept on the couch most nights? I couldn’t fucking stand it,” he grumbled. 
“Bennett, I didn’t fucking know I was doing that!” You shouted. A few people turned their heads at the rise in your voice, but you didn’t care. The anger was awakening inside you again, pounding to get out of the cage you had locked it in. 
“Yeah, I know,” Bennett said, rolling his eyes. “I still hated it. I hated knowing that even when you slept, you still loved him. I was never going to be the person to make you happy.”
Tears stung your waterline, and you swiped them away before they could fall. 
“That’s why you left.” It wasn’t a question. It was a realization. 
“I called Joel the night before the wedding,” he confessed, cringing at the admission. “I told him how I felt, and he told me to leave. Well, he didn’t tell me… It was more like he threatened me. He told me that if I didn’t, he’d find me. We both agreed to stay out of your life, and I think you can piece together the rest.”
You sat before him, speechless. You knew it all along; you were the reason Bennett was unhappy. Instinctively, you always knew it. But hearing it aloud? That was a pain you weren’t ready for. Everything was your fault, from beginning to end. Bennett couldn’t love you, Joel couldn’t fight for you.
Why were you so unloveable? 
None of this was your fault, yet everything pointed directly back at you. 
You had nothing left to say to Bennett, so you shoved away from the table and fumbled for your purse. He said your name cautiously, grabbing your wrist before you could turn away. You tried to free yourself from his hold, but he squeezed tighter. 
“Stop!” You snapped. 
“I’m sorry, okay?” Bennett pleaded. “I really am, whether you believe it or not. I fucked up a lot, and I regret the way I left. It wasn’t fair to you.”
“This apology would have meant a lot more two years ago, Bennett,” you cried, still trying to free yourself. 
“I know it would have, but I’m doing it now. Alright? I’m sorry for everything I put you through, and I know none of this has been easy for you—.”
“You don’t know shit,” you seethed. 
You finally wrangled yourself out of his grip, rubbing your wrist to alleviate the pain from his touch. Bennett stared at you, agonized. You had walked in here hoping for an apology and got it. But it wasn’t enough. What was the point in all of this if nothing healed the pain inside you? 
You stumbled out of the cafe with blurry eyes, the cage bars inside you breaking piece by piece. It was only minutes before the anger fully consumed you, and you needed to leave before you let it wreak havoc on everything around you. You needed silence. You needed solitude. You needed a hole to crawl into. 
Before you could open your car door, Bennett called out your name and tore you away from the swirling thoughts inside your mind. You tried to ignore him, but he was relentless. Whipping around to face him, you came face first with his chest as he pulled you into an embrace. 
“I’m sorry,” he whispered, tightening his arms around your ridged body. “Hate me all you want, but don’t hate Joel. I can have my own grievances with him, but he loves you more than I ever could.”
You slumped into his chest, letting the anger overwhelm you to the point of complete defeat. Crying in Bennett’s arms was the last place you ever expected to be in, but here you were, sobbing into your ex-fiance’s chest. He held you through each wave of emotions, remaining solid and silent. 
“Hey,” Bennett whispered, pulling away. “Obviously, I don’t know shit about what’s going on with you, but it’s going to be okay. It’ll take time, but you’re going to be alright. I hope you get those memories back one day. I really do. You deserve to remember the things you lost, and I’m sorry for ever getting in the way of that.”
“Thank you,” you mumbled, wiping away the tears streaming down your face. 
Bennett gave you a soft smile and said his goodbyes. You watched him as he retreated to his car, waiting for him to drive away. As you turned toward your car again, you glanced up at the hardware store across the street, meeting the eyes of someone familiar. Someone you didn’t expect to see. 
Joel’s brother, Tommy. 
The resentful glare in his eye was deadly, and you couldn’t hide from it. He saw you with Bennett. He would tell Joel, even without knowing what had just transpired. For a brief moment, you wanted to rush over and explain everything to him, but you stopped yourself. It didn’t matter what he told Joel—at least, that’s what you told yourself. You could only shy away from Tommy’s scrutinizing stare and duck into your car. 
You had been gone too long from your numbness, and you missed it. It was time to bury yourself in your sadness once again and continue trying to unlove Joel Miller. 
**
Joel dumped his tools on the dining table with an exasperated sigh. He immediately reached for the fridge, grabbing a beer and popping it open in one fluid motion. As he leaned against the counter with the bottle at his lips, Joel heard the garage door slam shut. Peering around the corner, he tracked Tommy’s movements as he walked into the kitchen. 
“What crawled up your ass?” Joel grumbled. 
Tommy shrugged off his button-up and tossed it over a dining chair. He ran a hand through his greasy black curls before glancing at Joel. Joel shifted uncomfortably, trying to make sense of Tommy’s demeanor. 
“Seriously, Tommy,” Joel huffed. “Spit it the fuck out.”
“I saw her downtown,” Tommy finally said. “She was with that ex-fiance. The one you almost killed.”
Joel swore he felt his heart stop beating. Tommy must have seen wrong; it wasn’t you. It couldn’t have been you. You wouldn’t seek out Bennett, not after everything. You weren’t even seeking Joel out, even after two weeks of earth-shattering silence. 
“Are y’sure it was her?” Joel asked through clenched teeth. 
Tommy nodded, his eyes drawn to the floor. 
“Yeah, it was her. Not sure what was goin’ on between them, but I saw them huggin’ and all that outside of a lil’ cafe,” Tommy explained. 
“Probably doesn’t mean nothin’,” Joel shrugged, trying to let denial take over.
If he could deny it, then none of this was real. You weren’t with Bennett again—that wouldn’t happen. You wouldn’t do that. Bennett wouldn’t do that. Maybe Joel should have killed him. It would have torn you apart, but at least Joel could sleep at night knowing Bennett would never be in your life again. 
“Joel,” Tommy said, pulling him from his vengeful thoughts. 
“It doesn’t matter!” Joel yelled, slamming his beer bottle onto the counter.
The glass rattled between his fingers, and a slow trickle of liquid began seeping out of the crack he created. Joel glanced down at it, unbothered. 
“She’s not comin’ back, man,” Tommy sighed. “Y’gotta start movin’ on.”
“Go fuck yourself, Tommy,” Joel snapped.
He shoved off the counter and began to retreat down the hall, but not quick enough for Tommy. Tommy sidestepped in front of him, arms folded and a scowl twisting his lips. Joel knew Tommy hated everything about this situation, but he wasn’t the one experiencing the pain. He was just a bystander in all of this; he didn’t lay awake every night tossing over your words inside his head. 
I will never forgive you for this. 
Joel wasn’t losing you. He already lost you. 
“Listen, Joel. I know this is hard on you, but y’gotta face the truth. She’s gone, man. I know you tried your best to get her back, but it’s just not gonna happen. She deserves to make her own decisions for her life.”
“I know,” Joel sighed. “Doesn’t mean I don’t love her, still.”
Tommy’s brown eyes softened as he looked at Joel, his head dipping in agreement. 
“No one said y’had to stop lovin’ her,” Tommy offered. 
“I don’t think I ever will,” Joel said. 
Joel didn’t sleep much that night. Tossing between the sheets, Joel couldn’t steer away the thoughts of you in another man's arms—let alone Bennett’s. When Joel had seen you at parent-teacher conferences, he wanted to fall to his knees and beg for your forgiveness. He knew you had taken the news rough, but seeing you so physically distraught was another type of pain he hadn’t been prepared for. You were a hollow shell of the woman he loved; your voice held so much bitterness when you spoke to him. Your eyes didn’t look at him with love…it was his own personal Hell. Parting ways with you like that nearly killed him, but not knowing what was going on in your life killed him more. Joel had spent two years in limbo after your accident, always wondering what life would be like if he had you back. And then he had it. He had three beautiful months with you, albeit they were spent wearing rose-colored glasses, but he had you again. 
In the blink of an eye, in one messy series of events, he lost you.
He lost you, and he knew you’d never come back. 
**
~Six months later~
You thought time would heal the wounds left inside your chest, but you were wrong. Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months, and nothing felt better. You stopped talking to your family altogether, and the phone calls stopped coming after some time. Beth never tried to reconcile with you, nor did you try to fight for answers. Having your heart broken by Joel and Bennett was one thing, but having it broken by your sister was a different kind of pain. It was visceral. It was a betrayal so brutal you still had yet to recover. Thinking of the things she had said to you in Boston only left you with debilitating headaches; her words festered deeper than anyone else’s. 
The truth is that you are a fucking idiot. And on top of that, you’re a coward.
You weren’t the coward; Beth was. She chose to hold onto those secrets for the last few years and weaponize them against you. You weren’t the idiot; you were the victim. You were the victim in all of this, yet everyone wanted to pin the aftermath on you. 
You were a mad woman, haunting an empty house with no one to confide in. You cut off all friendships with other teachers, especially Maria. You became a hands-off teacher, only going as far as in-class readings, quizzes, and occasional tests when necessary. The students adapted to the shift in your mood, and while you lived with the guilt of becoming that teacher, it was the only way you could survive the work days. The less effort you put into things, the less risk you had for disappointment or frustration. 
Sarah avoided you at all costs during class. She no longer participated in class discussions—which were far and few—but kept her head low and her grades satisfactory. Sometimes, you’d catch her watching you during class, her hazel eyes swimming with concern. You couldn’t stomach looking at her for more than a few seconds. You weren’t sure if she ever reported back to Joel about you, and honestly, you didn’t care. Well, maybe sometimes you did. It didn’t happen often, but there were fleeting moments of unwelcome flashbacks to your time with Joel months ago. Flashes of his hands on your body, his crooked smile, his deep voice. They wove through your mind at the worst moments, and everything hurt again. 
The school year had finally ended, and your days were filled with endless bouts of nothing. You exhausted everything: plucking weeds in your front yard, rearranging your kitchen cabinets (for the seventh time), building a new bookshelf…You found anything you could to keep yourself busy and the wandering thoughts at bay. 
The Texas heat was becoming unbearable, so you opted to spend the weekend indoors, siphoning through your closet. Heaps of clothes cluttered the ground around you as you tore apart each shelf, miscellaneous keepsakes piled in the corner. It wasn’t until you were elbow-deep in the crevices of your closet that you found the book. 
Romeo and Juliet.
The flimsy spine and dog-eared pages taunted you. You sat motionless with your hands hovering over the book, torn between flipping through the pages and setting it on fire. Minutes passed, though they felt like hours, and you remained paralyzed, stuck in limbo between the past and present. You’d tell yourself it was a moment of weakness, but you grabbed the book and let your hands move through the pages. 
“Under love’s heavy burden do I sink.
And, to sink in it, should you burden love;
Too great oppression for a tender thing.
Is love a tender thing? it is too rough,
Too rude, too boisterous, and it pricks like thorn.
If love be rough with you, be rough
with love;
Prick love for pricking, and you beat love down.”
The words hit you harder than you expect. Staring at the margins of the pages, scribbled with your words and thoughts, you blinked back tears. You thought you were strong enough for this. Tossing the book halfway across the bathroom, you succumbed to the tears that pooled in your eyes. Laying on the messy floor, you wrapped your arms around your shins and stared at the book as it taunted you from across the room. Your eyes caught onto something peeking out of the pages, and you slowly tilted your head. 
That wasn’t…
No. 
You couldn’t pull yourself to your feet, so you decided to crawl to where the book lay. As you got closer, you started to make out the grainy features of Joel plastered onto a Polaroid. With shaking fingers, you lifted it into the light, your eyes growing wide. Basked in the hue of sunset sat Joel, his broad torso dressed in a white shirt, with the biggest smile plastered on his face captured in a moment of laughter. Something sparked inside your chest as you stared at it longer, your eyes memorizing every softened feature of Joel’s face. He still had that patchy beard you were so familiar with, the sparse spots along his jaw no different than they were now. Creases around his closed eyes proved that his laughter in the photo had been genuine. 
You missed his smile. 
Shaking away those tender thoughts, you tried to pull yourself to your feet, only to have your ankle caught in a strap of a dress, sending you crashing to the floor. Your arms tried to brace for impact, but you didn’t catch yourself in time. Your body smacked against the corner of your shower door, your head taking most of the impact. 
And everything went dark. 
“Sarah, you’re a mess!” You laughed. 
Her curls were caked with mud, and half her clothes were soaked. You, Joel, and Sarah had decided to drive into the small town outside the campground for dinner, and of course, you got caught in the rain. As you all made a beeline for the diner, Sarah tripped into a huge puddle between cars, splattering rainwater and mud all over herself. Joel couldn’t contain his laughter, and neither could you. 
Joel took a seat on the beach outside the diner, trying to catch his breath from laughing, but every time he glanced up at Sarah’s messy face, he lost it all over again. You scrambled through your backpack to find your Polaroid camera, snapping a quick picture. 
“Hey!” Joel laughed, grabbing you by the waist and dragging you down to the bench. 
“What?” You asked innocently. “It was the perfect opportunity! Plus, you look extra handsome right now.”
“Handsome, huh?” He smirked, peeking you on the cheek. 
You shook the Polaroid as it developed, presenting him with the proof. He was handsome. So fucking handsome. Joel reached for the camera in your hands, turning it quickly on you. You stuck out your tongue, trying to hold back another fit of laughter. 
“Perfect,” he grinned before turning toward Sarah. 
“Alright, kiddo. Smile!”
“Dad, stop!” Sarah wined. 
But Joel was too fast, the camera shutter going off right in time to capture Sarah’s big pout. 
Each of you had a Polaroid now, picture proof of a happy family. 
Pinpricks of pain stabbed into each side of your head as you finally roused from your sleep. You squinted through the harsh light of the bathroom, letting your eyes readjust to your surroundings. Everything was foggy, but you remembered. 
Oh God, you remembered everything. 
The nausea was quick to hit you, and you scrambled to the toilet. You weren’t sure if the fall was to blame for the sudden disruption to your body or the memories slamming back into place, but you were helplessly stuck with your head over the toilet. Flash after flash, like the shutter of your camera, everything fell back into place. 
“Oof! I’m so sorry!” You said, rubbing your nose.
You had turned the corner too quickly and smashed right into the solid chest of a student’s father. 
“S’all my fault, miss.” 
The voice alone sent shivers up your spine, but they multiplied as you gazed up into a pair of deep brown eyes. You lost all the words in your vocabulary as you took in the sight of the most handsome man you’d ever seen. He was too rugged and masculine to call ‘cute’; handsome fit him so much better. With dark scruff covering his jaw and creases around his eyes, whoever this man was…he was stunning. You were captivated.
“I really should have looked before I turned the corner,” you rambled. 
“Don’t go apologizin’,” he said, offering you a kind smile. “I coulda got outta the way.”
“Do you make a habit of taking up an obscene amount of space?” You joked. 
“Depends on the hall,” he countered, extending his hand. “Joel Miller.”
You told him your name, then shook your head. 
“I should probably keep it professional. You can call me Miss Smith.”
“Nah, don’t need all the formalities here. Your name is just fine.”
“Is your daughter enrolled here?” You asked. It was hard to maintain the color creeping into your cheeks. 
“That she is,” he said proudly. “Goin’ into third grade this year. She’s a real good kid.”
“I bet she is. I’m only student teaching while I finish my Master’s program, but I’ll be taking on a position with middle school students next year. Maybe she’ll be my student one day.”
“I reckon she’d be pretty lucky,” he offered. 
“Yeah?” Now, you were definitely blushing. 
“Yeah,” Joel smiled. “Somethin’ ‘bout you makes me think you’ll be one of the best teachers in the school.”
“That’s a bold statement, given the fact you hardly just met me.”
“I wouldn’t hate it if I got to know you more.”
Your eyes shifted down the hallway, watching for any teachers that might be coming. You weren’t sure what the policy was for flirting with a student’s parent, but it was hard to stop when he was so enticing. 
“I don’t think I’d hate it, either.”
Another wave of nausea hit you, and you groaned. The room was spinning, your body ached from falling, and countless memories continued to pile up inside your mind. 
You were overwhelmed. 
Those two years of nothing became everything in the span of minutes. 
Dragon Tales was playing softly in the background as you curled your body around Joel’s. His hand was tracing circles around your shoulder as you both “watched” the TV. Something electric pulsed between your bodies, an unavoidable shift that had continued to unfurl over the last several months. You didn’t know how to verbalize your emotions—at least, not without knowing if he felt the same. 
“Joel,” you whispered.
His eyes were already on you when you finally glanced up. It was written all over his face. It was the proof you needed; he felt the same. 
“Yeah, baby?”
“I really like you,” you confessed. “Okay, well, maybe I really, really like you.”
“Maybe I really, really like you, too.”
You peeled yourself from his warm body, turning to face him completely. 
“I’m gonna say something,” you warned. “Please don’t freak out. It’s okay if you don't—.”
Joel’s lips were pressed against yours before you could finish the sentence. You melted into his touch, your hands coming up to tangle in the messy curls at the nape of his neck. He held you firm to his mouth, his tongue dragging over your bottom lip. 
“I love you, baby,” he mumbled. “So much.”
You reeled him in for another frenzied kiss, all your efforts to contain your smile going down the drain. Oh, God. He loved you. 
“I love you, Joel.”
You sagged onto the bathroom floor. The throbbing in your head was growing stronger and stronger with each memory. You wanted to tear your brain from your skull and flush it down the toilet, but that wouldn’t help anything. This was what you wanted, wasn’t it? All your memories were coming back, and yet, you desperately wished they would fade away again. 
You loved Joel. 
It was a fact you already knew, but remembering the exact moment you admitted…. You were going to be sick all over again. 
“Y’look so pretty in my t-shirt, baby,” Joel hummed.
He lay up against the headboard of the bed while you paced the room. You gripped the binding of your copy of Romeo and Juliet, your mind racing a thousand miles a minute. It was hard to focus when his bare chest was on display, the spattering of dark chest hair swirling down his torso and disappearing under the waistband of his boxers.
Focus. 
“Don’t distract me!” You pleaded. “Okay, you know how I was talking about how Romeo is just head over heels for Juliet? Get this: they kiss right away in the first act! He’s so bold with how he speaks to her, and then he just kisses her. And Juliet’s response is basically telling Romeo that all of his sin is on her lips now.”
“And what happens next, baby?” Joel asked, quirking a smile. 
“Romeo says, ‘Give me my sin again’, and then they kiss… again!” 
“Ain’t he just a romantic,” Joel chuckled. “Now, can y’get your sinful ass in bed?”
“What? This one?” You teased, flipping up the hem of his shirt. 
Joel’s eyes dropped to your backside as you exposed your naked body, and he nearly went flying across the foot of the bed to grab you. You shrieked with laughter as he tugged you onto the comforter, flipping you onto your back. 
“C’mere, baby,” he growled.
His lips trailed down your neck, sucking marks into the skin just below your collarbone. You let out a small whimper and helped guide the t-shirt off your body. Somewhere along the way, your book had dropped to the ground, but you didn’t care. You’d much rather give into the sin of Joel’s lips on your body. 
It felt like an eternity had passed when your stomach finally settled. You managed to drag yourself from the floor, staggering your way into the bedroom. The migraine behind your eyes had still yet to subside, so you threw yourself into bed and buried your body under the comforter and pillows. You had everything back—everything you wanted—but why wasn’t it enough? 
The images of Joel swam through the pressurized ache inside your mind; his smile refracted in the blinding light of a constant camera shutter. Snapshots of the past dissolved from the darkness, fragmented puzzle pieces slowly molding into place. 
Another flash, another memory. 
A frustrated scream erupted from your mouth, muffled into the pillows surrounding you. Every thought started and ended with Joel. Joel. Joel. Joel. Was this how it felt to go crazy? 
It was clear that sleep was evading you; it ran from the thought of Joel quicker than you could. Pulling yourself from the bed, you emerged into the bathroom once again and began rifling through the piles of clothes. 
What the hell were you supposed to wear to see someone who was no longer a stranger?
163 notes · View notes
Warnings: branding (of reader), as well as typical yandere themes like abduction, mentioned murder, mentioned violence, and threats.
There are also slight spoilers for the main quest (Idk how the quests are organized yet HAKDHD I didn't pay attention. But I'm at the point where I have to get to union lvl 21 to continue the main quest, so no spoilers for those quests).
ALSO HI LADIES here's your yearly fanfic. The drabbles are in chronological order. Its nearly 2.9k words total. Goodbye now.
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Scar is a busy man who, by the nature of his work, can't settle down in any one place for too long.
It's what is keeping you sane, honestly. You only have a certain dramatic, scarred, card-wielding bastard on your couch (or, as is becoming more frequent, next to you when you wake up) for a few days every once in a while. His visits are irregular and unpredictable, just like he is. 
That doesn't make it much better, though. He seems to take pride in being a pest. Scar loves attention, and unfortunately, he's not above being annoying to get it. From monologues about the great Lament to asking you about tragedies that seem random, until he openly admits to being the culprit so he can tell the story, there's little he won't do to keep your eyes on him. None of it is anything that would be helpful to the authorities, of course, but there's not much to avoid talking about there. The Fractsidus has always made their ideals quite clear, after all.
One of the first things you do when you find him, relaxing in your living room like he owns it, is threaten to tell the higher-ups about him.
"Alright, then. Go right ahead!" With a seemingly carefree smile, he crosses his legs on your couch, feet on the table and all, and gestures towards the front door.
You narrow your eyes at him and back away, not tearing them away for a second. He snorts and gives you a small, sarcastic little wave and an ingenuine closed-eye smile.
Your back hits the door behind you, so you're forced to turn around to undo the deadbolt. Right as you do, though, a strange, bright red blanket of cards spreads up from beneath your feet, encasing you in a dome. You blink, and you're under a red sky on a desolate, floatibg island. Whirling all around you is a maelstrom of decimated buildings and pillars.
You whirl on your feet, and your eyes land on him, standing only a few feet away from you with one hand on his hip. A muted sense of anxiety thrums uneasily in the back of your mind. Your eyes meet his, one red and the other a dull gray, and you think you finally understand how a deer in headlights feels.
"Are you going to kill me?" Your voice is eerily steady and calm, belying the anxiety and adrenaline rushing through your veins. It sounds alien to your ears.
He outright laughs in your face and leans in close. "What reason would I have to lie?" he asked. "If I did want to kill you, I'd just tell you. There's nothing you could do to stop me." He places a hand on your head and ruffles your hair, undeterred by your instinctual flinch.
"Remember this. With the new Lament growing ever closer, nobody has the resources or time to spare to keep a simple civilian, like you, safe from someone like me." Scar's tone lowers towards the end with a dark promise, and his smile sharpens into a smirk.
He turns on one heel and walks away. With a snap of his fingers, the chaotic scenery melts away to reveal your simple living room once again. "Consider that a warning. Even if you did tell anyone, do you think they could do anything that would help you?" He looks over his shoulder at you, his dim, empty eyes flashing dangerously.
"Think about the price they would have to pay for your own desperation."
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Night has long since fallen, but you're still out and about. It's not that you have anything left to do, it's just... when you go home, you're going to have to see Scar again. If you have to listen to another of his monologues, you might actually try to kill him. It's not because you're a little scared of him. Of course not.
(Your eyes still dart around nervously, jumping at any flash of red you see.)
You check your phone for the time, only to find it's just past midnight. Everything is closed, and you're really not sure what to do now. Maybe you should just suck it up and go home. The thought has you slumping your shoulders with a defeated sigh.
A hand clamps down on your mouth, and another strong arm wraps around your waist, pulling you against a firm chest. In a panic, you kick and flail and try your best to scream, but it's all futile. They drag you into the alleyway behind you anyway.
"Relax! It's just me," Scar purred, the hints of a laugh tinging his voice. His breath fans against your ear. "I've just noticed... You've been spending so much time out and about, it's like you’ve forgotten about me. Consider my feelings hurt."
Scar pulls the both of you into one of his all-too-familiar crimson portals. You try to pipe up with some snide comments or annoyed curses, but his hand only presses more firmly against your mouth.
"Ah-ah-ah." He moves his hand into your sight from your waist just to wag a claw-tipped finger at you before he places it back, securing you against him again.
It's only a few seconds before a wall in your bedroom comes into view and the red light of the portal behind you disappears. All of a sudden Scar falls backwards, pulling you helplessly along with him. You make an embarrassing, surprised little squeak on the way down, reflexively clinging to him until you both land on the bed behind you.
He lets out an amused little chuckle and rolls over, putting you both on your sides with his chest pressed against your back. He buries his face in your throat with a sigh and finally frees your mouth so he can hold you close like a plushie.
"I know what you were trying to do," he murmurs into your ear, a threatening undertone to his voice.
Your breath catches in your throat before you can stop it. "I don't know what you're talking about. I was just busy."
His lips dance across your skin, and you can feel his smile against your throat. "You don't think I'm gullible, do you?"
Well, dammit. So much for that. You try to look at him to gauge his reaction, but his arms only tighten around you. His face is hidden in your neck anyway, so it's a lost cause.
"I'm... sorry?"
"As long as you don't try it again, dollface."
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For a few months, maybe a year (depending on the timing and your temperament) Scar doesn't think he'll need to kidnap you. You're somewhere safe, in a place where he can come find you whenever he pleases. Why bother? Besides, it's nice watching you go about your day.
Unfortunately, he slowly comes around more and more over time, making this outcome inevitable. There are two primary factors. The prophecy is the first; his free time dwindles more and more as it nears its fulfillment, and the idea of having you available at any given moment becomes a more alluring prospect day by day. Alternatively, you're too desperate to get rid of him, and he decides it would be easier to isolate you, away from any "pesky helpers," as he would put it.
Scar tosses the idea around in his mind for a few days before he makes his final decision. He won't even keep it a secret from you, either; he tells you this casually in the spur of the moment, in a bid for your attention. Maybe you seem disinterested, too busy paying attention to something else. Maybe you've realized his "weakness," as you might call it, and tried to give him the silent treatment. Either way, what you do can push him towards a decision a little early. He usually takes great care to reign in his impulses, but with you, he doesn't have to. An ordinary citizen like yourself would have quite a bit of difficulty getting away from him, after all. He finds your helplessness freeing, to a degree.
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"I've been thinking lately," Scar trails off, clearly fishing for your response.
"You can do that?" It's out of your mouth before you can think to stop it. You almost regret giving him what he wants, but the opportunity was too good to pass up. At the very least, you can focus on the dishes you're washing instead of sparing him a glance.
He snorts, but otherwise doesn't acknowledge your comment. "I think it's about time we take our relationship to the next level. Don't you?"
Your head snaps in his direction. "The hell does that mean?" you demand. Your face twists in a mixture of confusion and slowly dawning horror, an expression the bastard revels in. His toothy grin widens, and with a flick of his wrist, he produces a card out of thin air to idly spin and flip between his fingers.
"It's been really nice spending time with you here, you know? But unfortunately, duty calls, and I can't always spare the time to come visit." Scar sighs dramatically with an exaggerated frown, resting both arms on the back of your couch. "It's such a shame. I'm sure you miss me, don't you?"
You uneasily turn back to the dishes, putting another on the drying rack and picking up a new one. "Not really. Don't you have any friends to talk to?"
"And there's the other point!" You refuse to look at him, but you can hear his footsteps as he leisurely saunters to the kitchen. You try to focus on scrubbing off a particularly stubborn patch of grease on your pan. "You can be so hard to deal with sometimes! It makes me wonder if all the effort I go through to keep you happy is worth it."
You furrow your brows, a frown tugging at your lips. The moment you move to speak, a red-tipped finger comes from behind to press against your lips in a shushing motion. "Now, now, dear. No need to tell me it isn't true." His face leans into view from over your shoulder with a smile. "Besides, I'm sure you'll be just as excited for this as I am."
"Excited for wh-"
Scar cuts you off without words, making the world spin as he turns you around to face him. Your pan falls with a clatter, and suddenly you're faced away from the window above the sink and looking up into his face, split by an ear-to-ear grin. His pupils are blown wide with excitement, lit up by a manic glint in his usually dull irises.
"You're coming with me. You have three days to write out your will and say goodbye to the people you care about," he spoke, his voice rough at the edges and trembling with suppressed amusement. His hands rest on the edge of the counter on each side of you, caging you in. "Try to run away or tell anyone, and I'll kill them all. Obey, and they can live."
Scar leans in so close that his nose brushes yours, with a stare so intense you would have thought his eyes were glowing. "We have a lot of things we can do with their bodies. Would you like to see what a Tacet Discord born of human flesh looks like?"
You can't tear your eyes away from his intense, bright stare for even a second. With slow, trembling movements, you shake your head.
"Now that's what I wanted to see." Scar leans in, pressing a kiss to your lips, only pulling away after a long moment. "Not so hard, was it? I'm sure you'll be alright, there's no need to be scared!" He brightens up in a flash, any trace of his previous threats gone. He licks his lips as he turns away from you.
"All that being said, I'm sure something similar will happen to your family in the true Lament, so it doesn't matter. But if it makes you happy, I don't mind leaving them be in the meantime." Scar looks up at nothing in particular, summoning another card to toy with idly. His spare hand rests behind his back.
"Isn't it boring how the world is stagnating?" Scar starts up again. "Chaos, as orchestrated by the great Threnodians, can create a form of equality impossible to achieve with our current status quo..." His voice turns fuzzy in your mind as you tune his droning out. Three days? Where is he taking you? What about your life?
You take a shaky breath, bringing a hand up to tug at your hair. Wasn't there anything you could do? All his talk of controlling one's own destiny flashes in your mind, mocking you. Would you ever see your family again?
You only realize that Scar has noticed your breakdown when he places a hand on your shoulder and pulls you close. "Aww, don't cry," he murmurs, wiping away tears you didn't even realize were falling with a thumb. "It's not so bad, I promise." His lips stretch into a facsimile of a comforting smile, and he strokes your hair in an attempt at comfort. He pulls your face into his shoulder, periodically shushing you.
You stay like that for a few minutes, and when he deems you suitably stable, he moves to lean on you with one arm on your shoulder, the other outstretched before the both of you in a grand gesture. "Don't worry, just imagine it. Wouldn't it be lovely, being safe and sound by my side in my new world?"
"Not at all. Are you sure you don't hate me?" You mumble, your voice rough and tired.
He rolls his eyes. "Darling, I could never. Oh well, I'm sure you'll come around." Scar shrugs it off. Suddenly, he snaps his fingers, and his eyes flash, as though he had remembered something important. "Oh, by the way, the rest of today is the first of the three days. Would you like to get a head start?"
Fuck.
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One day, Scar returns from one of his excursions with a plan in mind. Without a word, he sits you down in the makeshift infirmary of his Fractsidus hideout of choice for the week. For once, he refuses to answer any of your questions, instead opting to gather a few medical supplies from around the room. When he's satisfied with the collection—bandages, ointment, and a bottle of painkillers—he sets them down on the table next to you.
"Did you get hurt out there or something?" You cross your arms and lean back in the uncomfortable metal chair. "Don't expect me to bandage you up." If that growing smile is anything to go by, he knows you're just trying to cover up your sense of unease, but he doesn't call you out on it.
"You wound me. But to answer your question, not quite."
The hair on the back of your neck stands on end. What could he have planned?
Scar isn't going to let you theorize for too long, it seems. He kneels in front of you, one of his signature ram skull cards held flat against the palm of his hand. He ignores you as you flinch away, tensing up, eyes darting between him and his hand.
"What are you doing?" you hiss. Scar chuckles in lieu of a response. His hand drifts up to the side of your throat, pressing his palm—and the smooth side of the card within it—firmly to the skin of your throat. As if reading your mind, his opposite hand lands on your opposite shoulder, keeping you in place before you can try anything.
With a wink, a sharp-toothed grin, and a faint flash of red from beneath his hand, he sears the card's image into your skin with a flash of white-hot pain. The rest is a blur. All you can remember are your cries as he presses your face into his shoulder, stroking your hair as he shushes you.
Now you sit on the couch, with a cup of (instant, but still) hot chocolate in hand and soft bandages around your throat. Scar crosses one leg over the other and slings an arm around your shoulder, pulling you in close.
"Why?" you ask simply, with not even enough energy left to look at him.
He hums in mock thought, making a show out of considering his words. "Well, there's really not much to it," he shrugs with one of his characteristic smiles. "I was just thinking of something more... permanent, today."
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mawidixon · 2 days
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Saying "I missed you" won't express how I was dying inside
Daryl x fem!pregnant!reader
One-shot
Genre: Angst, fluff at the end
Warnings: Twd violence, swearing, pregnancy stuff,
Setting: Season 7 - Hilltop
Summary: After Daryl was taken by the Saviors, your life became much more difficult. However, you had a little reminder of him growing inside your womb.
A/N: This is my first one-shot. I did my best, but I'm not sure what to think about it. I hope you like it! Have a nice day! Sorry for any mistakes if there are any.
@mawi22 I don't want my work to be modified, copied, or any of this kind of stuff without my consent!!!
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Your situation was rather of the ‘surprise’ kind of pregnancy that most women would not have been expecting to happen to them any time soon. At first, you could only feel the element of fear as you tried to think of how Daryl would respond to this new development that you never saw coming. It was troubling in your heart, for you understood well that he had his qualms about having a baby at this stage in life. There lies the grey area of a personal experience of a man who could not escape the dark memories of his childhood to become a responsible father and provider; the fear of making the same mistakes and reproducing the same patterns that define bad parenting. The commitment that a child would bring was too heavy for him to bear at this time in his life as he saw it as a mountain he would have to climb. This was the feeling you had when you were carrying this secret within you, a feeling of conflict within the self, torn between protecting him from the truth and the truth within your senses and conscience. However, with time, the silence became unbearable and you got to a stage that one could not continue suppressing the truth anymore regardless the fact that it created a feeling of awkwardness. The desire of getting closer and creating a fair partnership could not remain unanswered anymore, so it is, you had to face this sensitive concern with bravery and openness.
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As time went by, Daryl's feelings for the unborn child grew stronger. Despite his initial fears, the anxiety that had plagued him over the past few months began to fade. He had always been cautious, but now, a new kind of tenderness emerged. When you were cuddling on the couch, he would often place his rough, calloused hand on your belly, rubbing it gently as if he could already feel the connection to his child. Daryl's efforts to prepare for the baby were evident. Every time he came back from a run, his backpack would be filled with baby clothes, toys, and little trinkets he thought might be useful. His eyes would light up with a mix of pride and excitement as he showed you his finds, his voice tinged with a rare softness as he explained why he chose each item.
One night, you pretended to be asleep, curious about the whispers coming from his side of the bed. You peeked through half-closed eyes to see Daryl leaning close to your belly, his lips barely an inch away from your skin. He was talking to the baby, his voice low and gentle, filled with promises and dreams for the future. It was a side of him you rarely saw, vulnerable and hopeful, and it made your heart swell with love. However, Daryl's protectiveness sometimes bordered on overbearing. He couldn't stand to see you doing any kind of unnecessary work. Whether it was lifting a box or bending down to pick something up, he would swoop in, insisting that you rest and let him handle it. At times, it was endearing, but often it left you feeling frustrated. You appreciated his concern, but you also craved a bit of independence.
"Darlin', you shouldn't be doing that," he'd say, gently taking a task out of your hands. You'd sigh, sometimes rolling your eyes, but deep down, you knew it came from a place of love and fear of losing you both. Despite the occasional annoyance, you found comfort in his unwavering dedication. Daryl had faced so many dangers in his life, but none seemed to shake him as much as the prospect of fatherhood. And in his own way, he was already proving to be a devoted and loving partner, ready to protect and cherish his growing family.
...
That was until Negan and his people took Daryl. The day everything changed, you were at the Hilltop, just weeks away from your due date. The anticipation of meeting your baby was mingled with the joy of Daryl’s newfound tenderness and protectiveness. It was supposed to be a time of hope and new beginnings. You were resting in one of the rooms when the commotion outside caught your attention. Peeking through the window, you saw a group of people rushing towards the main gate. Your heart sank as you recognized Sasha and Maggie, both with tears streaming down their faces. You hurried out, your swollen belly making every step a little more difficult.
Sasha spotted you immediately and ran over, her face a mix of grief and urgency. "Daryl… they took Daryl, and killed Abraham and Glenn." she said, her voice breaking. For a moment, her words didn’t register. The world seemed to tilt, and you had to steady yourself against a nearby wall.
Tears welled up in your eyes, and before you knew it, you were crying uncontrollably. Your sobs echoed through the courtyard, a raw expression of the fear and despair gripping your heart. Everything had been perfect, or as perfect as it could be in this world. You were about to start a family with the man you loved, and now… now, he was gone. Each moment that passed without Daryl felt like an eternity. The fear that he might be dead gnawed at you, a constant, unbearable weight. You clutched your belly, feeling the baby move inside you, a bittersweet reminder of the life you had hoped to share with Daryl.
The Hilltop community tried to offer support, but nothing could quell the storm of emotions inside you. The world that had seemed so promising just a few hours ago now felt dark and uncertain. All you could do was cling to the hope that the love of your life was still out there, fighting to come back to you and the child he had already come to love so deeply.
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It was another day without Daryl. Each morning, you woke with a glimmer of hope that he might somehow return, only to be crushed by the reality that he was still out there, somewhere, in the clutches of the Saviors.
As you sat in the room you once shared with him, your eyes wandered to the baby items scattered around, each one a testament to Daryl's growing excitement about becoming a father. Tiny clothes, soft blankets, and the little toys he had brought back from his runs—each piece carried a memory of happier times. You remembered the day you and Daryl decided to keep the baby’s gender a surprise. It had been a moment filled with laughter and love, a rare lightness in your often perilous lives. He had said about teaching the baby to hunt and fix motorcycles. The memory brought a bittersweet smile to your face, followed quickly by a pang of sorrow. Now, with Daryl gone and no certainty of his fate, the need to know the baby’s gender became overwhelming. It felt like a way to hold onto him, to make the waiting a little more bearable. Perhaps knowing would bring some comfort, some sense of connection to him amidst the chaos.
You made your way to the Hilltop’s infirmary, your heart heavy but resolute. As the doctor performed the ultrasound, you held your breath, tears threatening to spill over. The sound of the baby’s heartbeat filled the room, strong and steady, a small beacon of hope in the darkness.
“It’s a boy,” the doctor announced with a gentle smile, and the tears you had been holding back finally flowed freely. You clutched your belly, imagining a little boy with Daryl’s piercing blue eyes, his determined spirit, and his fierce love. The knowledge that you were carrying a son gave you a renewed sense of purpose. You whispered to your belly, promising Daryl that you would stay strong, that you would protect their child with everything you had. The thought of a little boy who would grow up to be a hundred percent version of his father brought a sliver of light to your heart.
Each kick and movement from your baby boy was a reminder of the love you shared with Daryl, a love that had created this new life. Despite the uncertainty and fear, you held onto the hope that one day, Daryl would return, and you would introduce him to his son. Until then, you would keep fighting, for both of them.
...
Thirty minutes had passed, and you were in the kitchen, preparing something to eat. The rhythmic chopping of vegetables was almost soothing, a temporary distraction from the gnawing worry that had settled in your chest. Maggie was sitting beside the table, her expression a mix of concern and frustration.
“You should really let me do this,” Maggie insisted for the tenth time, her voice firm yet gentle. “You’re in the late stage of pregnancy. You need to rest.” You sighed, pausing for a moment to look at her. “Maggie, I’m fine.”
Maggie opened her mouth to argue again, but the sound of the gate to the Hilltop cracking open interrupted her. Her head snapped towards the window, eyes wide with curiosity and a hint of hope. She quickly got up, moving to the stove to turn off the gas. "Hey, what’s going on?” you asked, a mix of confusion and worry in your voice.
Maggie turned to you, her face lit up with a sudden, intense emotion. “Daryl came back!” Her voice trembled with joy and disbelief. For a moment, you stood there frozen, the words echoing in your mind. Daryl came back. The knife slipped from your hand, clattering onto the counter as you felt your heart race with a mixture of hope and fear.
You hurried towards the door, following Maggie. As you reached the courtyard, the sight that met your eyes took your breath away. There, amidst the gathering crowd, was Daryl. His clothes were worn and dirty, his face marked by exhaustion and pain, but he was there. He was alive.
Daryl looked up, and his eyes met yours. For a moment, everything else faded away. You rushed towards him, your hands instinctively moving to your belly, feeling the life inside you kicking in response to your racing heart.
“Daryl!” you cried, your voice breaking with emotion. He moved towards you, his steps quickening as he saw you. In an instant, he was there, his arms wrapping around you, holding you close. You buried your face in his chest, sobbing with relief.
“'m here,” he whispered, his voice rough but filled with love. “’m here, an' 'm not goin' anywhere.” You pulled back just enough to look up at him, your hands cupping his face. “I was so scared,” you admitted, your voice shaking. “I didn’t know if you were...” He just wiped away your tears in response.
In that moment, surrounded by the warmth of his embrace and the sound of his heartbeat, the world felt right again. You held onto him, promising yourself that you would never let go.
To your surprise, tears began to stream down Daryl’s face too. The strong man you knew, who rarely showed any signs of weakness, was now falling apart before your very eyes. He got on his knees and cupped your distended belly with his calloused hands, running his fingers over your skin softly, which brought tears to your eyes. "How is my little one?" he said with happiness and the tenderness of a father. He smiled at you and the weariness in his eyes was replaced by hope. “He’s okay,” you responded, not even realizing that you were saying it out loud. As for Daryl, his eyes opened wide in shock. “He?” he repeated, coming to the realization. It suddenly dawned on you that you had let it slip. You had planned to surprise him but in the heat of the moment, you blurted it out. “I’m sorry. .. Yes, I shouldn’t have—”Before you could finish, Daryl’s face softened. He slowly stood up, reaching out to cup your face gently. He said softly, “Nothin' to apologize for.”
"I love you"
"I love ya too"
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Karma's a B*tch (Carlos Sainz Jr. x Female Reader)
Genre: Fluff Word count: 709
Carlos Sainz Jr. finds himself at the mercy of his Gen Z girlfriend, Y/N, who loves to play pranks on him.
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Carlos had just returned home from cycling, his hair still damp and his knees feeling like jelly. He walked into their cozy apartment in Monaco, the familiar scent of home instantly putting him at ease. The apartment was warmly lit, with soft golden lights casting a serene glow over the modern furnishings. The windows were open, allowing a gentle evening breeze to waft through, bringing with it the faint scent of the nearby Mediterranean Sea.
He spotted Y/N lounging on the couch in the living room, sipping an Aperol Spritz. She was comfortably nestled among plush cushions, her feet propped up on the coffee table. She looked up and smiled at him, but there was a mischievous glint in her eyes that he missed.
“Hey, bella,” Carlos greeted, dropping his gear bag by the door and kicking off his shoes . “How's your evening going?”
Y/N took another sip of her drink and set the glass down, her expression shifting to one of feigned seriousness. “Carlos, I need to tell you something.”
His brow furrowed as he walked over, sitting beside her. “What is it? Did something happen?”
She took a deep breath, her tone grave. “I was a bad girl, I did some bad things. I swear I did it all for fun and it meant nothing.”
Carlos blinked, his face scrunching in confusion. “Eh? What are you talking about?”
Y/N continued, her face a perfect mask of sincerity. “I was a wild child, you always knew it. It was a matter of time before I blew it.”
Carlos's eyes widened, panic starting to set in. “Wait, what? What exactly happened? Why are you telling me this just now?”
She put a hand to her chest, looking remorseful. “Thou shall not lie, thou shall not cheat. Thou shall not get caught or you'll end up just like me.”
Carlos's mouth fell open, his mind spiraling. “Y/N, this doesn't make any sense! What did you do? Are you in trouble?”
She sighed dramatically, her expression serious. “Karma's a bitch, I should've known better.”
Carlos got up and started pacing, his voice rising with anxiety. “Karma? Are the police involved? Do we need a lawyer? Talk to me, mi amor!”
Y/N struggled to keep a straight face but soldiered on, her acting impeccable. “Carlos, please. I didn’t think it through. It was just... a matter of time.”
Carlos's panic escalated. “A matter of time for what? Are we being blackmailed? Did you run over someone?”
Finally, Y/N couldn't hold back any longer. She burst into uncontrollable laughter, nearly spilling her drink. “Carlos, mi querido, I'm pranking you! It's the lyrics to a Jojo Siwa song. It's trending right now.”
Carlos froze, his face a mix of relief and bewilderment. “Wait, what?”
Y/N was doubled over, tears streaming down her face. “Your face! I can't believe you fell for it!”
Carlos let out a deep sigh, finally laughing along. “I thought you had done something terrible! Jojo Siwa? Who even is that?”
Y/N wiped away her tears, still giggling. “You were ready to call a lawyer! I couldn't have asked for a better reaction.”
Carlos shook his head, still chuckling. “I can't believe I didn't catch on sooner. But seriously, you had me so worried.”
Y/N grinned, leaning in to kiss his cheek. “Just keeping you on your toes. You need to know these things to stay hip, you know?”
Carlos wrapped an arm around her, pulling her close. “I'm an old man, Y/N. I can't keep up with you and all the Gen Z trends.”
Y/N smirked, raising her glass in a mock toast. “To keeping you young and entertained, then. Here's to many more pranks.”
Carlos laughed, clinking his imaginary glass with hers. “Just go easy on me next time, okay? I don’t think my heart can take much more of this.”
Y/N snuggled into his side, her laughter subsiding into contented smiles. “Deal. But no promises.”
Carlos sighed contentedly, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “You’re impossible, you know that?”
“And you love me for it,” she replied, a satisfied grin spreading across her face.
He smiled down at her, feeling the warmth of her laughter still lingering in the air. “Yes, yes I do.”
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All In 8
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No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.
Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, power imbalance, low self esteem, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: you meet a mysterious man on a night out with your sister. (petite!reader)
based on the winning option for this poll
Characters: casino owner!Bucky Barnes
Note: Hellllllooooo 😁
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.
Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.
I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖
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The next morning comes too soon and with too little sleep. Despite your efforts, you couldn’t lay still long enough to get much rest. Every time you sunk into the shallows of sleep, you were just as quickly awoken by visions of the unknown. You don’t know anything beyond the time at which you’ll set off to your fate; nine o’clock. 
You don’t need an alarm. You're already awake and alert. You sit up and rub your temples until the thumping dulls. You can’t entirely shake the pulsing thrum.  
You drag yourself to your feet and cross to your dresser. You open each drawer, sifting through the contents with disappointment. You don’t have anything that nice. You pick out your nicest jeans and a halter top Roxie gave you. You’ll be sweating your bum off in the denim but you don’t have many skirts or even shorts. 
You can hear your mother getting ready for her own day of work. Of actual work. You wait until she’s done to claim the bathroom. She’s off only a couple minutes after, calling out a goodbye and I love you that you return in a higher pitch than you mean to. 
You dress and tidy yourself up as best you can. Your bedtime shower did little to help you sleep but at least it saves you a step. You spritz yourself with strawberry body spray and try to smile at your reflection as you put your toothbrush back.
Sigh. Did Bucky really call you sexy? 
It’s not even eight. Lots of time to wallow in anxiety and self-doubt. You pace around the front room, ready to go, but not really. You have your purse with the fringe and your least-worn flats. They pinch around your toes but they’re cute; pink loafers with a little leather rose on each. 
You cradle your phone then squeeze it hard enough to make it light up. Only a few minutes. Or not. You hear a car outside and peer through the curtain. You recognise the vehicle. Shoot, time to go. Oh, god, what are you doing? 
You lock the door behind you and turn to face the gallows. Each step is filled with sand, your legs are heavy and your feet clunky. As you near, Merv appears to open the door for you. You’re surprised but not to find Bucky waiting within. 
As you slide onto the seat, he watches you and rumbles out a silty, ‘morning, doll.’ You aren’t ready. You don’t know why but you thought the drive would give you time to toss away the last of your caution but you’re clinging to it like a raft. You feel entirely powerless. More than you ever have. 
What he promises, money; you always assumed it would give you more control, that it would solve all your problems, but it’s really just a new set of problems. You settle onto the seat as the door closes and buckle your seat belt, focusing on the simple task. He stretches his arm over the back of the seat as you lean against it and his heat seethes into you. 
“Good morning,” you force out at last. 
“That’s a cute shirt,” he purrs as his hand wanders down to tickle your bare shoulder, your nude bra strap showing garishly. “Would look better without this.” He touches the strap and you make a noise. “But I can wait for that, doll.” 
You stare forward. The divider between you and the front seat is up. You are completely alone. You feel your heart about to swell and split. 
“I’ll admit, I was up late last night,” his arms shifts slightly as he leans forward. You only notice then the scent of coffee and two cups in the holders behind the console. “Got a pick-me-up to start the day. Gotta be awake for you, doll.” 
He takes one of the cups and you realise, he means to offer it to you. You feel too bad to tell him you’re not much for coffee. “It’s called a blue dream tea latte? I think it’s blueberry or something. I saw it in some ad online. Sounded like something you’d like.” 
“Oh, thanks, er, it does?” You murmur. You’d seen the same promotion on Pinterest. It’s a rather strange coincidence that he’d think of you. “I... I’ve never tried a tea latte.” 
“Doll, I’m gonna give you lots of things you never had, take you places you never been,” he flutters his fingers across your neck as he retracts his arm. He grabs the other cup and groans as he sits back, blowing over the plastic lid. “So tell me,” his arms presses against yours. He seems so big sitting so close, “where’ somewhere you always wanted to go?” 
“Er, I don’t...” your eyes drift over as Merv drives lazily through your neighbourhood, “know. I never... thought about it.” 
“Anything you always wanted to do? Skydiving? Wait, yeah, you don’t like being high up. Makes sense, being so close to the ground, huh?” He chuckles and leans into you playfully, “you an outdoorsy type? You like hiking?” 
“Um, I don’t know, I think... I like walking in the park sometimes,” you hold the cup with both hands, letting the warmth flow into your cold veins. You can smell the blueberry and you instinctively take wife through the slot of the lid. 
“Mm, don’t worry, we’ll figure it out, doll,” he assures you and sips again, swallowing thickly before he lets out a thigh. “I think you’ll like what I got planned, even if you don’t know what you want. I’ve always been good at figuring that out, you know?” 
“Oh?” 
He laughs again, “you’re so cute, doll.” He looks over at you, “how’s the latte? Did I do good?” 
Your eyes nearly cross as you stare at the cup. You bring it up carefully and take a dainty sip. You almost moan at the creamy but sweet taste. You pull the lid away and dab your lips with the back of your hand, turning to give him a wide-eyed look. 
“It’s delicious,” you smile. 
He grins and tilts his head, “see, doll, you don’t even gotta say it. I know exactly what you need.” 
You’re breathless. Something about his tone, his words, mingles and coils around your throat. It’s like one of those old Wattpad fantasies you devoured in your teen years, those escapist dreams of having everything taken care of and not having to think, and yet, it’s too real. You take another drink to keep busy. 
“After our first stop, we’ll eat,” he says, “that okay? You’re not ravenous?” 
His words make you flinch. You blink and shake your head, “I’m okay.” 
“Sounds good, doll,” he relaxes and once more extends his arms over your shoulders, this time hugging you closer.  
He turns his head and nuzzles you, making you squirm. You’re rigid, paralysed by the proximity. You’ve never been this close with anyone. He still feels like a stranger. 
“Mmm, strawberries,” he growls, “I like that.” 
You giggle and barely keep a hold of your cup. You really can’t understand it. You never had interest from anyone. You didn’t even really have friends in school. Sometimes, you even think Roxie hates you, and your mom, well, she loves you because you have to. You just can’t comprehend what he sees. 
“Thanks...” you wisp. 
“No, thank you, doll,” he drawls, “for making my morning brighter.” 
🃏
You doubt Bucky does anything in half-measures. Merv pulls up to another upscale building and you can’t help but gape out at the white brick facade. Everything is so big and fancy and better than you. You’re so out of place in his world that you can’t but wait for the moment he decides to kick you out of it. 
The white-haired driver gets out to open the door. As you step out, your loafer slips off your heel and your foot slides down the curb. You trip outward, bracing yourself for impact, but don’t hit the ground. A hand wraps around your arm and pulls you back onto the seat. You cringe, happy at least that Bucky can’t see your face as he clings to you. 
“You okay, doll?” He asks, “you hurt yourself?” 
“No, no,” you wriggle in his grasp, “I’m fine. It was just... stupid.” 
“Not stupid, good thing I was here to catch you, huh?” He reluctantly releases you, a caress along the back of your arm, “now you be careful. You need me to get out and carry you--” 
“No, no!” You grab the car and push yourself out, fixing your shoe as you get your bearings. “Really, I’m okay.” 
He chuckles and follows. It he laughing at you? You turn to face him as he steps up on the curb. It’s easy when he’s sitting to forget how small you really are. 
“All good, doll, I just can’t have you getting banged up,” he says as he gestures you across the wide sidewalk. 
You peer back as Merv shuts the door and Bucky brings his hand to your lower back, just like that woman at the casino. His gentle touch sends a chill up your back despite the beaming heat from above. 
“Promise, you’re gonna love this.”  
He urges you on to the front doors. They are made of iron, twisted in the middle, and two long handles curlicue in the middle. He stops and presses the little silver button along the side, a buzz muffled within. You wait, fidgeting, and presses his palm firmly to your back. You still yourself and clutch your bag tighter. 
The interior doors, dark walnut, open inward and a woman appears within with a particularly snobbish look. She’s tall with straight shoulders and a Chanel style suit. She unlocks the iron doors and opens the right one. She eyes Bucky past her hooked nose as she lifts it higher. 
“Mr. Barnes,” she greets. 
“Meredith,” he returns, “thanks for having me.” 
“Only for you,” she assures as her eyes fall upon you, “you’ve brought...” 
“Someone very special. A connoisseur like yourself,” he insists, curtailing whatever she thought to remark. 
“Yes, certainly she would be,” the woman accepts with a sniff and steps back, “please, come in. Should I have Charlene make tea?” 
“I don’t think we will require it. Doll?” He pauses as he confirms with you. 
You shake your head, “no thank you.” 
“Very well, follow me, then,” she spins and struts away.  
Bucky nudges you inside first, following through the narrow door. As he comes up parallel to you, a shadow appears to close the doors behind him. The whole experience is eerie. What is going on? 
You follow the woman, Meredith, up the wooden stairs with a rose-printed runner along the center of the steps. At the top, you smell the definitive scent of books. She directs you into a room, opening the door but standing back to let you through. Bucky nods and thanks her one last time. 
“You know the rules, Barnes,” she warns. 
“Been a while...” he mutters. 
“You remember,” she rebukes. 
He laughs and pulls the door shut as she retreats, her heels clicking through the wall until they taper off to nothing. A record player drones from the corner and the window lets in the yellow sunshine, adding to the illumination of glass-shaded lamps. You peer around, as curious as you are confused. 
Bucky brushes by you, knuckles rubbing against your waist, and he approaches the antique table at the center. Several stacks of books sit neatly piled atop it. You approach sheepishly and read the spines. You recognise the titles though you’ve never read any of them. As you think, you realise that these are the same books you have on your reading app. How could he know? 
Your mouth falls open as you keep your hands folded together. You don’t dare to touch anything. It all seems so nice and likely expensive. And with how Meredith spoke, you’re certain she wouldn’t appreciate you putting anything out of place. 
“She’s a book collector. I came here a few years back to buy some first editions for my sister,” he picks up a book. 
“How...” you bend to read further down a stack. 
“A lot you can learn about a person online,” he flutters through the pages, “isn’t there?” 
You look at him and blanch. 
“I know you Googled me. Everyone does,” he snickers, “it’s fine. Comes with the territory. But you...” he snaps the book shut and comes around the table, holding it out to you, “all I found were some books and a few pictures of a cat.” 
You take the book and stare at the cover. Those pictures were old. Kai died at the end of high school. You run your hand over the embossed title; Middlemarch. You remember adding it after binging and old British series. 
“My cat. She’s gone now,” you shrug. 
“Sorry to hear that, doll,” he says. “I might know someone who can cheer you up, though.” 
“It’s... fine. She was a good cat,” you shrug. 
“Hm, yeah, but a friend, all the same,” he says, “so, you want it?” 
“What?” You peek at the book again. 
“All of them? I can have them packed and sent to your house.” 
“Huh?” Your eyes nearly bulge out of your skull, “my mom...” 
“Ah, it’s fine, we can sneak em in,” he assures. 
“No, no, I couldn’t... it’s too much. Very nice but... must be... a lot.” 
“It is, doll. Meredith gave me a damn headache tryna get in here on short notice but I did it,” he leans a hand on the table and hooks one foot over the other. “You gotta at least pick one thing to walk out of here with.” 
“Oh, I... I wasn’t meaning... I didn’t mean to be ungrateful,” you rub your thumbs along the edges of the book, “sorry.” 
“It’s fine. I know you’re not, doll. You’re... adjusting. I’m doing my best not to scare ya away but you gotta bite the carrot a little here,” he says, “so grab a few and we’ll go have some breakfast.” 
“I...” you look between him and the table. You have no doubt that he went to a lot of effort for this. For you. You can’t just throw it back in his face. “Thank you, it’s...” you turn to face the table and lean in to see more of the books. You let yourself smile, “it’s wonderful. No one’s ever... except mom...” 
“Get used to it, doll,” he steps closer, his hand once more on your back, “with a smile like that, I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of seeing it.” 
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dilfluvrr10 · 3 days
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Joost x music journalist!reader where joost invites them for a show and they thinks its for work but actually he did it bc he likes them 🤭
Guysss I just wrote thisss. This is my first fanfiction I've ever written, pls pls pls feel free to send through any feedback good and bad. I really hope I managed to satisfy your request. Thank you <3
Lmk if you're interested in a Part 2
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╭── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──╮ The Interview ╰── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──╯
I looked through my closet unsure of what to wear, do I go concert or casual tonight? This was going to be huge for my career, interviewing THE Joost Klein, so of course I was stressing over every detail. I settled on a classic little black dress, nothing too much, enough to make a good first impression. I glanced at the time repeatedly while doing my makeup, the closer it crept to 7:00pm, the more anxiety started eating at me. I packed my bag and drove to the venue, practicing each and every question, my facial expressions, my laugh, my smile, every detail. I admit, Joost was an attractive man, a confident man, and a great musician, maybe that’s why I was so worked up. That’s definitely why I was so worked up. I’d been following Joost’s career before his stardom reached an all time high after Eurovision, I had to remind myself to keep my composure and leave any fangirling behind.
When I received the invitation I was absolutely thrilled, jumping up and down like I was a teenage girl again. However, it was different from the usual press releases I’ve received, addressed to me specifically instead of my publication. Despite my usual professional demeanour, I couldn’t help but feel a flutter of excitement. When I finally arrived at the venue my anticipation only intensified. I glanced in the rear view mirror one last time, ensuring every hair was in place, took a deep breath and stepped out of the car. I had been instructed to enter through the same way production entered and meet Joost in the green room before he was expected on stage. Backstage was buzzing, ensuring everything for tonight’s performance was perfect. I navigated through the organized chaos, my heart pounding with each step closer to the green room.
There he was sitting around a table laughing and joking with his friends in Dutch. “Heyyy you’re here! I’m so happy you came”, his signature smile plastered on his face causing one of my own in response. He told his friends we were doing an interview and to so kindly leave, each one greeting me with that European charm before exiting the room. He gestured for me to sit down where comfortable. He sat loosely on the couch, adorned in black jeans, a white button up paired with a black tie and his signature thick rimmed glasses and gloves to tie it all together. God black was his colour. His cuffs rolled up, revealing a scatter of tattoos on his forearms and biceps. I sat on the chair closest to him but not on the couch next to him, trying to keep it as professional as possible. I really wanted to squeal, ask him for a photo and tell him all about how much his music resonated with me.
“Thank you so much for the invitation, I really appreciate this Joost”, my nerves slipped away as we began talking, his energy warm and inviting. “No, no, I’ve wanted to meet you for a while now actually…” his words hung in the air, his eyes darted around my face as if he was unsure how I would react. “Really, you know me?” I was stunned by the idea of Joost being aware of my work. A soft smile played at the corners of his lips as he nodded. “You’re works amazing, you have this way of talking to people that just…opens them up, you know?”, the sincerity of his words hit me hard. My heart fluttered and I felt my professionalism slowly decay. He shifted in his seat adjusting his pants and clearing his throat. He was feeling the change of mood too. As I thought of something to say to change the subject I noticed his gaze kept falling to my lap. My dress had lifted a bit, my thighs exposed a little. I began to feel hot and bothered, my cheeks burning red, his subtle smirk didn’t escape my notice, only adding to my discomfort. He clocked on to my embarrassment, shamefully, it fed him with confidence. “I used to watch your videos on YouTube, when you were working independently. Seeing you now here in front of me…you’ve really, grown up” he cooed with a meaning I couldn’t quite grasp. I cleared my throat, trying to shake off the rush of heat that grew in my body. “Thank you Joost, that means a lot coming from you,” I replied, hoping to steer the conversation back to professional grounds. “So, how are you feeling about tonight’s concert? Any pre-show rituals?”
He chuckled, the sound sultry and pleasant. “Just hanging out with my friends, like you saw. We try to keep it light and fun. Music is about connecting with people, so I try to keep that spirit alive before I go on stage.” I nodded, jotting down notes even though I recorded interviews on my phone. It was more to keep my hands busy and give me something to focus on other than his heavy gaze. Our conversation flowed easily after that, and the interview wrapped up nicely. He stood up, offering his hand to help me up from the chair. His touch was warm, lingering just a moment longer than necessary. “I’m glad we finally got to meet,” his eyes held mine for a heartbeat longer before he glanced away, a hint of shyness creeping into his demeanour.
Just then, one of his crew members popped their head into the room, announcing that it was time for Joost to get ready. He turned to me, his smile back in full force. “Enjoy the show. I’ll make sure you have a great view.”
I smiled back, my heart fluttering again. “I’m sure I will.”
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undercoverpena · 10 hours
Text
14. soft periwinkle
frankie morales x f!reader | chapter fourteen of do me yourself
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summary: a meet-cute in a hardware store? impossible, out of the question. except, that's exactly what happens. a need for screws leads you to a broad-shouldered, brown-eyed man who you're sure is about to change your day, never mind your life.
wordcount: 3.8k chapter warnings: dad!frankie, luca appears. frankie calls you 'rainy' (paint-related from chp.1) no other descriptions or name used. no use of y/n. brief mention of frankie’s sobriety. an: thank you so much for being patient for this chapter, things are still odd at home but I've missed this pair so much <3
prev chapter | series masterlist
key: frankie is in bold, you are in italics
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Limbs stretching out, sheets rustling, your smile grows as your hand remains clasped around the phone as you bring it to your ear—
Good morning, baby.
It’s a sound that's so perfect. Just for you.
It's a sound that's so perfect. Just for you. A treat to enjoy each day—sometimes this way, sometimes in person. Still, it's almost cruel when a day starts so perfectly but doesn't end that way. You whisper your response back, even though there's no one in the house you need to be quiet for.
But it’s instinct, just like loving him is.
I love you, Frankie whispers—deep, a little gruff, voice muddled still with sleep. I love you, you repeat back, eyes staring at the photograph on your bedside table.
The one on his side of the bed. Because you have sides now.
You’d printed it the other week and chose the frame a week before that. Eyes flicking over photo-him, how his chin is raised, eyes closed, little lines in the corners from how much he’s laughing as one arm keeps you close, and he rests his other hand on the top of his abdomen.
You hadn’t taken it, Benny had. Sent it to you thirty minutes after he’d snapped it without the two of you knowing.
When will you be here? Frankie's honeyed voice asks, making you sit up from the pillows, push down the duvet. Once it’s delivered, I’ll head right to yours. I’ll be there soon, you whisper—hearing him groan as he stretches.
But soon hadn't needed to feel this long.
Busying yourself, mug in hand—warm against your palm—you lean in the doorway of the office he's built, noticing the time. How it rudely ticks on, widening the gap from the end of the call to the moment you'd hoped to be with him.
You’ve found yourself lingering in this doorway a lot lately, piecing it together, almost trying to recall what it looked like before he’d gotten his magic touch on it. The final touches are almost ready to be made, with the blinds due to be fitted soon.
And this morning, the sun has been trying to show, ready to drape the space in warm gold—little rays of light trying to break through clouds, show more than just spots of cyan between the fluffiest white.
Phone buzzing, you pull it from your back pocket, finding you’re the next stop. A thing you already knew from tracking it since you’d risen. Glancing at the little dot as it bounced around the streets as you checked your emails, showered, dressed and made coffee.
His coffee. Not able to go back now you’ve tried it.
The bubble of anxiety in your chest flares as you drain your cup. It doubles when you place it in the sink. Wiping your hands on a dishcloth, you linger close to the front window, hoping it’s perfect—knowing it needs to be.
Not that there’s any time to fix it if it isn’t.
Not even a backup plan made, a thing you half-kick yourself for as the truck pulls up outside. As your fingers flex and you dig your nails into your thighs—not wanting to open the door and wait, appear impatient; but also not wanting to spare any seconds from not being able to check it.
Not that you’d even needed to worry.
A thing that made you grin the entire drive over, keys jangling up his drive, pushing open Frankie’s front door, closing it behind you as you shout, “Luca?”
There’s a pause.
Then you hear him.
Excited bare feet slapping against the floor, thrill filling your chest, eroding all earlier worries as you move to the living room, kneel on the rug as the little boy runs to you dressed in a white onesie, various shades of dinosaurs at all angles covering it.
An outfit you remember Frankie telling you about the other week.
“Oh, well don’t you look cool?”
Grinning, spotting the smallest gap in his smile, remembering the panicked conversation Frankie had reenacted when he’d called Sam, as the man himself waves at you from the kitchen.
“You like?”
“Of course, you look so cool, Luca!”
“Cooler than Daddy?”
Flicking your eyes to Frankie, half-smirking. “Don’t tell him, but yes. Anyway, I’ve got something for you.”
Pointing at himself, he grins even wider—if that is at all possible. “For me?”
Crouching down, you slide onto your knees, before pulling open the paper bag that crinkles as you gently take out the white t-shirt inside, unfolding it, showing it to him.
And the look, as you expected, is priceless. His eyes widen, joy exploding in them as his finger gently, all but cautiously, scratches at the drawn image now ink-printed on. All you can do is watch, practically fixated on his little brown eyes tracing every element of the thing the two of you had huddled around your laptop over. How a few weeks ago, he had huddled close, dug his knees into your thigh and let you show him how he could arrange it all. His little finger guided by yours until the drawn image he’d crayoned into paper sat where he wanted on the screen, joined by the photo Frankie had found of Luca and Sam were in position. Wanna add some dinosaurs? you’d asked, aiding him in choosing cartoon dinosaurs and stars until he was happy.
“You made this! Can you believe it?”
Nodding, he continues to stare, finger-stroking at one particular photo on the t-shirt. “Mommy will like I thinks.”
“I think she’s going to love it. I bought some gift wrap—do you want to try and do it with me later?”
Nodding again, but more enthusiastically, his hands interlock in front of him. Doing a little wiggle as he stares, as he moves from the t-shirt to you.
“Thank you.”
“Anytime,” you say. “I’m going to fold this up—just so we don’t get it dirty. And then later, we can wrap all the other things for Mommy before she picks you up.”
“Okay.”
“Okay,” you repeat, watching him hesitate.
A beat occurs. The t-shirt slid safely back into its bag before you feel it—little arms, the familiar scent of laundry and the softness of new fleece. A warmth exploding in you that makes you almost well up, a desperation to cling a little tighter when your arms instinctively move around him, hugging him back as little breaths tickle your ear.
“Thank you, Rainy.”
Your face shifts, trying not to choke up at the nickname coming from his mouth as your eyes meet Frankie’s in the doorway—the biggest smirk on his face.
“You’re welcome, Luca,” you whisper, as the two of you release.
It’s not even a second, barely a moment to take in what has happened before Luca shouts (enthusiastically) that he has a new toy—running back off, barely aware of the size or significance of his hug.
Fingers wiping your eyes, giving Frankie a don’t start expression as he offers his hand out to you.
“Coffee?”
Laughing, letting him pull you up, you nod, “Please.”
Sliding your arm around his back, half walking and half being led to the kitchen, unsure how you could ever begin to describe the content feeling pulsing inside of you.
“You okay?”
Nodding, you wipe another tear, staring at him, before you press a kiss to his lips. “Hi.”
“Hi, baby.”
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Have I told you how happy it makes me when I get the notification that you've posted and I find you looking so good?
Do I need to know how to build decking in Will's yard? No. Do I suddenly want you to dick me? Yes.
When did you start uploading hour-long videos?
Morales, I don't think you know how hot you look laying planks of wood.
Didn't know laying decking would get you so worked up.
Anything you do gets me worked up, keep up.
How worked up are you?
Worked up enough that I'm wondering if your lunch can be extended or whether I should go for an afternoon nap.
Your code for naps is broken. I know what that means now.
I trust you with my secret. Especially since you love my naps.
I do. But then I love everything about you.
Am I going for a nap alone, Morales?
No, but start without me, but do not finish.
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Did you send flowers to my house?
The card saying Frankie didn’t give it away?
I got a card saying Maurice. Are you telling me your name is Maurice Francisco Morales?
Fuck. They must have misheard me when I called them at drop-off.
Well, they’re lovely, Maurice. I’m very excited to be wined and dined by you—are you sure 8pm isn’t too late for you?
Hilarious.
Do you have to be careful of what you eat? In case you’re up all night.
I’m hoping to be up all night anyway.
You mean with me right? Not with indigestion.
Have I told you how funny you are?
Not today. They are really pretty, Frankie.
I can’t wait to pick you up tonight.
I can’t wait to forget to put underwear on.
Fuck.
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For the amount of time it’s taken for the two of you to get here, as soon as he holds the door for you, you can see it was worth it.
A thing you feel you should have known before now, when he’d showed up to pick you up with flowers in a nice shirt and a pair of slacks eyes widening at the sight of you—a scratchy, syllable broken fuck, you look beautiful leaving his lips as you try not to drag him into your home.
You only stop yourself from doing so because he’d insisted on treating this like a real date, and not just going out for food. Something you’d reminded him when his mouth slid over yours, when your spine met the front of your door and his knee tried to slot itself between your legs—hitching the fabric further and further up your knees. Chest heaving, already sure that the thin fabric between your legs is damp with want.
“If you do this now, you’ll ruin your surprise,” you say against his parted lips, eyes flicking up, finding pupils almost swallowing brown. “It’s a good surprise too. Lacy. New.”
You were still thinking of the groan he emitted when he told the hostess his name.
Tearing your eyes away from his, you sweep them slowly over the restaurant, the urge to tighten your fingers around his hand almost unbearable as your heart swells with a tender ache.
Because the restaurant is nice, really nice. It’s nothing short of warm, romantic—cosy. Each table is graced with a flickering candle, casting a gentle, golden glow that pirouettes on the walls. Fairy lights drape like delicate garlands over the bar area, the twinkling reflections like constellations in a night sky.
The deep red walls are decorated with local art, each piece telling a story with little tags beneath them highlighting the name and price of the creators as your gaze lingers on a particular painting. It’s a street, one a few blocks from here, Harold’s in the corner, nestled close to the edge, yet it holds its presence with quiet confidence.
By the time you’re seated, the sounds and murmurs of other diners have blended into a soft, melodic hum that mixes with the soft acoustic music. The air is tinged with rosemary with cooked dishes that flutter past on trays with swirling steam.
You can understand why it’s a place he’d wanted to bring you. Why there had been nothing but disappointment in his voice when he’d had to cancel all those months ago.
Your eyes gaze at him as he sits, dropping the stare when you brush your fingers over the leather menu—lips curling into your cheek at the sight of the candle flickering between the two of you.
“Big enough for you?”
Smirking, you bite down a laugh as you unfold your menu. “More than appropriately sized—you undersold yourself.”
Reaching across for you, your hand slides into his—finding itself home as his thumb slides over yours. Staring at the appetisers, the mains, it all sounds far too good, making it far too hard to choose. Eyes scanning over each, unsure what it is that you both want to eat or feel safe to eat—not sure if you’ve packed mints or if there’s a convenient way to brush your teeth between getting back and taking him to bed.
“I think I mentioned it, but you look good.”
“Oh, do I? I… I was not aware. Must have gotten lost in you pressing me against my front door.”
Snorting, he shakes his head, eyes lingering, something there etched and hanging.
“What?”
“Nothing.”
You don’t buy it, gripping his hand a little tighter—tilting your head to ensure your eyes lock onto his. “Frankie,” you say softly. Silently letting tell me to be spoken wordlessly.
“Sometimes I can’t believe that you’re mine.”
Tightening your hold on his hand, ignoring how your neck is warm, your chest and ears, you let a smile broaden out. More so, when his palm twists, interlocking your fingers.
“Believe it, I'm not going anywhere.”
Your lips remain parted, more words wishing to fall, willing themselves to. But you stop, staring at his thumb as it circles over your knuckles.
“Not… even to the bathroom?”
Laughing softly, you squeeze his hand again, feeling the warmth of his skin against yours. “Well, maybe for that. But I promise to come straight back.”
Smiling, it sliding into his cheek, he swallows before whispering okay.
“Can’t believe I met you because I decided to be spontaneous and try and dabble at DIY.”
Brushing his thumb over your fingers, he grins—that one which crinkles his eyes and makes his teeth show. “Can’t believe I gave such good service you stalked me a few days later.”
“I did not.”
“I don’t blame you Rainy, I look good in an apron.”
Shaking your head, exhaling loudly you lower your gaze to your menu. “Look better in just your hat, Morales.”
“Glad I’ve got it in the truck then.”
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Just finished the project, I’m done. All signed off. No more Mr Grump. So, how’s the second grump in my life?
I’m not grumpy.
It’s okay that you are, your son is on vacation.
I ate chicken nuggets and waffle fries for dinner.
Oh, baby. But was it good?
Ridiculously good. No wonder the kid is mad for them.
Do you want me to come over? I know you have work early and I can bring my laptop, work from yours tomorrow while you’re out.
I’d like that. But only if you want to.
Yeah, of course I do! I get to use my key!
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You still at home?
It shouldn’t make you smile, but it does.
Blooms over your face, makes you feel ridiculous, like you want to kick your feet out from under his blanket and shriek with joy. Because it’s simple; you know it’s a slip-up as he likely rushes from thing to thing.
I am. You/we are running low on groceries? Wanna go grocery shopping with me Rainy? Only if you let me push the cart.
He’d already called you on his lunch, told you how Harold had struggled with his breathing again, that he should be done in an hour, maybe two. I’m not going anywhere. Yeah? You’d only realised you’d been nodding when he called out your name and you quickly responded with a year.
In truth, you hadn’t left his home in four days.
A thing you’re beginning to feel increasingly guilty about. Like you’d moved in without as much as asking. Your things had found themselves even more with his, and deep down—later confirmed when you’d called a friend to catch up—you realised you didn’t even really miss your own place.
A thing which should feel odder than it does; a thing you turn over when you lock his door and head out to him as he pulls up to grab you. It turns over and over, almost folding in on itself by the time he’s parked up and exiting, still telling you about how he’d helped a man who knew even less than you—a thing he hadn’t known was possible.
It isn’t until he collects a cart, and wheels it to you with ease, do you realise he’s made you. Known right under your smile and humour that you’ve been thinking something.
“Tell me.”
Smirking, you exhale, walking in with him through the automatic doors as you’re both washed over in air-conditioning. “I’m wondering whether I go back to mine tonight for just underwear and clothes or…?”
Adjusting his curls under this hat, he steps behind you to avoid shoppers leaving the store. “Do you... want to go home?”
You’re thankful his hand doesn’t move from your back, allowing you to root yourself to it, letting him lead you to the fresh produce.
“I don’t want to overstay my welcome, that’s all.” You watch as he grabs a plastic bag, glancing at you. An unreadable expression gliding across his face. “What?”
“Baby, if I could have my way, I’d never let you leave.”
“You’re just saying that.”
“I’m really fuckin' not.”
Swallowing, you feel a flutter. A spread of warmth slides out across your chest and through your lungs—the same one you feel when he looks at you for a little longer than normal. When his smile catches yours when you’re talking to Benny and he’s fetching drinks with Will.
Watching him tie the bag, placing it down carefully, he straightens back up.
“Do you want to go home tonight?”
Biting your lip, you shake your head. “I’m also worried if I stay for another week, like I want to, it’ll be really hard when I do go back.”
Snorting, he ties another bag—an assortment of shades beginning to make a pile in one corner. “So, for your sake—and mine—I should tie you to my bed?”
Glancing around, mouth open and eyes wide, you smirk. “Francisco.”
Shrugging, he grins, grabbing the end of the cart, leading you to another aisle—one quieter, fewer people.
“If I had brought my croissant pajamas, you’d want me to go home.”
Holding up two items to you, you point at one as he nods in agreement, shelving the other where he found it and adding the other to the cart. “Your croissant pajamas?”
Licking your lips, you pretend to be enamoured with some dried sauces. “Well, I have my sexy ones where I aim to be naked, then my cute-but-he-could-still-make-me-naked ones, and then I have my food ones.”
“The fact you’ve not shown me these before now upsets me.”
Laughing, you feel him tug on the cart, as you reluctantly follow. “Because you want to laugh?”
“No, because I think you’ll look hot in them and then I can see how many puns I can do before my mouth is between your thighs.”
He makes sure to look over his shoulder at the last part. A thing you both like and rather loathe all at once, especially here—in a place with people. Where you can smother your little tells, but likely not hide them well enough from him and the way he knows you so well.
“I do really like your cockiness.”
“Oh, Rainy. I know you like the first four letters of that last word.”
Nudging the cart into him, his laugh makes your chest bloom. Almost explode. A sound you’ve had the chance to experience in person more lately—a treat, a thing you’re not sure if you can so easily give back up.
“You fancy something in particular for dinner?”
“Not sure—we should buy dinosaur-shaped nuggies, though.”
Adjusting his hat, he comes to a stop before some frozen doors. “I can grab those before Luca is back—”
“For us, Morales.”
Narrowing his eyes, Frankie slowly tilts his head. “You been eating dinosaur nuggies, Rainy?”
“I cannot confirm or deny. But I will say there’s not an age on dinosaur nuggies.”
“Fuck, you have! You like dinosaur nuggets.”
Shrugging, mirroring him from before, his gooey smile slides up into one cheek—making that dimple appear, making it hard not to reach out and brush it with your finger and then your lips.
“We should buy some granola—maybe fruit? Be adult-like.”
Rocking his head from side to side, he shrugs, nodding,
“Hey,” you say, passing some cakes—large ones, lots of frosting, “It’s your birthday soon, isn’t it?”
Tearing his eyes from a shelf, thinking, he slowly nods.
“And, does that mean it’ll be your sixth year too?”
Fingers sliding over the cart handle, waiting, not pushing, he slowly grabs a box, placing it down with the other things, before moving closer around the cart. “You remembered?”
“Well, I love you, Morales. What’s important to you is important to me.”
Nodding, he scratches at his arm, momentarily looking lost in the cereal aisle. Like he's shrunk, lost. The shadow of his smile having faded, almost flattening to a thin line.
“Frankie?” you ask, watching in real-time as he comes back to you.
Like the world goes from black and white to colour.
“Do you... want to do anything for it?”
“My birthday?”
Smiling, you look down briefly before meeting his gaze. “No, your six years.”
Shrugging, he picks up a box, stares at the back of it, likely pretending to read it. To be in awe of it.
“What if I said I wanted to do something for it? To celebrate you. Would that be too much?” You wait a beat, watching him re-shelve the box, and his Adam's apple bobs in his neck. “It can be small. Just us. I can even just get you a cake, but no candle, of course.”
Snorting, he runs his palm along his chin. “Of course.”
“Think about it. Let me know,” you say, pushing the cart closer, nudging him with the end of it as he flicks his eyes to you.
And then it's slow, cautious.
Begins with a gradual lift of his knuckles under your chin when he's beside you, tipping your mouth up to meet his—and you swear you taste a thank you on your lips as he kisses you. As he places another, and another. Your hand slips to his lower back, feeling yourself want to turn and momentarily forget how public the two of you are, when you feel him ghost his mouth over yours, eyes slowly opening, practically drinking you in.
“Don’t go home just yet,” he says, your lips rolling together, fingers slowly splaying out on his back. “Unless you want to go, that is.”
“I don’t.”
“Then stay.”
“Okay.”
He doesn’t step back, not immediately, whispering an okay himself as his eyes flick from one of yours to the other. “Please bring your food pajamas.”
“You gonna promise me you’ll still love me?”
Pressing a kiss to your forehead, sliding your other hand from the cart as he steals it from under you, he grins. “Forever and ever.”
“I might hold you to that.”
He just grins. A knowing grin.
You find you don't hate the look one bit.
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NEXT CHAPTER ->
we're almost to the end of this pair, and that hurts my soul. i'm going to miss them so much. thank you for all the support until now, and going forward. i adore each of you for coming along this ride with me, even if all i gave you was hardware frankie and some texts.
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deoidesign · 2 days
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#ok finally making a post about meds#I've not ever tried taking medication before. I was sorta raised with that classic 'dont rely on meds you have to learn to manage without'#I mean I was also raised with the idea that therapy is stupid unless you have 'real' trauma. and also like idk.#can't stay home from school unless your temp is over 100 or you're throwing up. etc. very suck it up mindset#so I was just really nervous to start. also of course worried about losing myself or whatever I know that's a silly fear but#it's also a common fear for a reason!!! anyways#so I finally was like 'I need to do something' when I realized I was so anxious I couldnt even get myself to go outside alone#like I just don't want to do ANYTHING alone to a detrimental effect. and it was butting into my ability to do my work...#for various reasons. but then ALSO adhd has been a constant issue with my work as well!#it is SO hard to write and draw on a weekly pace like I am without being able to focus#my whole life I've had these terrible nightmares constantly and I've always woken up constantly in the night#sleep has always been terrible so I've always dreaded going to bed.. ESPECIALLy because it didnt even make me less tired#it was more something that I just did because I had to.#but going to bed was always terrible. there have been times I was too scared to go to sleep for weeks on end...#I've been mitigating this for years of course. and recently I've been taking melatonin which has been helping too.#but I've also always struggled to get up. because I've always been EXTREMELY exhausted#but also anxious of what the day might bring... idk.#anyways it has all hit a point that I was like okay. I am doing as many coping mechanisms as I can. the psych said they were good too#but... it just has never been enough. it's never been enough to make me not tired it's never been enough to make me not scared#so I finally talked to the doc about it. and she was like youve def got smth wrong basically. which yah I know.. but yknow#anyways so I started taking wellbutrin. and I am so frustrated now. because it's WORKING#that constant looming sense of dread is gone. I'm excited to get up. I'm excited to go to bed BECAUSE I'm excited to get up#I feel like for years I've been holding on to the idea that I have to get up because I have to put something good out into the world#and I've been clinging to knowing that if nothing else. I am able to help other people feel better.#but now for the first time in my life I'm like. free of it. I didnt even know it was possible... and I'm so sad how much I've lost out on#and so frustrated how my whole life I've been told to put up with it and push through it. and treated like a failure for it being too much.#and just. It has only been 2 weeks. but the lack of anxiety is SO noticeable I'm so...#I'll never miss it. the adhd is still pretty present but like whatever. I can manage that better.#and I'm just crying because of all this combined.#I just. I hope I get to finally be the best I can be now. for myself but also for you guys!
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acesw · 2 days
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Reverse: 1999 : Disabled Characters
The game doesn't stray too far on the neurodivergent allegory for the arcanists themselves. But at the same time, there are also inclusions of other characters who are very much known to be disabled. So for this post I'll delve into that, just a bit.
Now, there are 10 characters that I want to put in the spotlight. These mostly lean towards being canon, but a part of these are also researched upon and shortened so the post doesn’t become way too long.
Cristallo, Rabies, Erick : Chronic Illness
It's quite self explanatory that Cristallo herself has a chronic illness. She was born prematurely, with an added condition that makes her physically fragile. As seen in the game, she needs a life-support system to maintain her health when she's outside. It's also implied that her condition may be a recurrent cancer, as her arcane abilities are tied to a machine that provides cobalt therapy, a known advancement in radiotherapy in the post-WWII era.
Rabies is an odd case. In his stories, it's noted that Adam cured Alicia through unknown means at the cost of contracting rabies himself. However, instead of the virus being acute and guaranteed to be fatal, it becomes a chronic illness to Rabies due to the abundance and use of arcanum. And since the rabies virus attacks the brain, his cognitive capabilities and ability to recall things before the present had been impaired, making him rather docile and animal-like in nature as a result.
Erick, as revealed in her anecdote, has a hereditary blood condition that came with her arcane skill. With her arcane skill making her physically powerful, overusing it will accelerate the effects of her blood condition to the point that it can become fatal. To prevent this, she also inherited an armband from her grandfather, Harald. The armband suppresses one's ability to use arcane skills, but by extension it also prevents Erick's condition getting worse.
Shamane : Amputee
Shamane's circumstances are also self-explanatory. He lost his arm for unknown reasons, but after having lived without it for 20 years, it doesn't bother him anymore. However as we know, he crafted his prosthetic arm as a means to avoid scaring kids. (which I think is quite cool in itself)
Ms. Radio, Bessmert : Blindness
Ms. Radio and our new friend, Bessmert, are both canonically blind. Ms. Radio has stated that she cannot see, and asks Vertin to left in places where she can feel temperatures to make her feel at peace.
And as we know, Yenisei (or in other words, Yenisei's VA) has stated in the 1.6 livestream that Bessmert is known to be blind, but even with that, she's a great researcher and guide to her.
Mesmer Jr. : OCD [Content Warning: Mentions of Self Harm and Suicide.]
Mesmer Jr.'s character has heavily implied throughout the main story and her own to have OCD as a result of the traumatic experiences she had gone through from her field of work and her family’s history in it. She identifies that she has "incurable" anxiety, which causes her to think differently about arcanists and act a little irrationally from our own perspective. This anxiety results in double checking everything and having a slightly intensive routine.
This routine is created as a means to maintain herself and her own sanity, but an imbalance or interruption can greatly upset her. As a result, she has conflicting ideals, experiences hallucinations and panic attacks, has suicidal thoughts, and actively inflicts self harm as a means to cope with her anxiety. However, she’s calmer and at peace with herself when she's left alone in a quieter and clean space, away from others, and where nature is heard more than constant buzzing. In short, Mesmer Jr.’s mental health is really complex and would be better if it's explored in a separate post.
Baby Blue : Alice in Wonderland syndrome
It's no secret that Baby Blue has Alice in Wonderland syndrome, or in other words dysmetropsia. This affects her perception of reality and her ability to recall, but this in turn makes her arcane abilities all the more powerful. As a result, she doesn't realize that she's growing up, yet it seems she doesn't mind that much. This doesn't seem to affect her physically either; In fact, it has a heavy influence on how she displays her arcane skills.
Poltergeist : Social Anxiety
Poltergeist has been known to be anxious in social settings which conflicts with her people-pleasing tendencies. She's also insecure about herself which adds up to her not wanting to be directly perceived. At the same time, she doesn't like being left alone as a result of having been ignored and forgotten post mortem. Poltergeist is also elaborate (i.e. not wanting to be looked at for too long) yet awkward at the same time when communicating them.
However, I'm not sure how to describe Poltergeist's case quite well, but the idea of her having social anxiety resonates greatly in my mind, so it can be treated as a partial headcanon.
Balloon Party : Autism and Speech Impairment
Balloon Party as a child had contracted an illness that caused her to have a persistent high fever. In the end, she awakened her arcane skill this way, with her being able to cough up balloons that can be harmful or a cure to anything.
However, it might have also affected her speech because of the physical strain that comes from coughing, it results to BP's speech being a bit slow and having abnormal pauses before she speaks again. Though, this also might be a sign of her possibly also having autism, where rigid and uneven language development is a common pattern in how autism affects one's ability in communication. Her speech also has a pattern of echolalia, having a flat tone, and lack of control of it.
However, speech impediment isn't everything about autism, and there's a lot more about BP's character that also connects with it such as her special interests. I can better explore this in a different post, which will be explained below.
Last Notes
These are the characters I’ve written down, most of these are less headcanon and more of observations I’ve found when looking into these characters. Some people from the lore chat have also added their own insights on some of them. (Thank you lupjo for beta-reading through it and helping me out) 
Of course, there are a few more characters I want to discuss because of the implications of them having autism / ADHD, but these will be written in another post in the future because I still need to research and gather other information. Additionally, it would be an opportunity to talk about the connections between an arcanist’s and neurodivergent person’s relationships with modern society.
Congrats for reaching the bottom of this post, and feel free to add your own ideas or headcanons about the characters here and/or any other ones.
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mechaknight-98 · 3 days
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Beastmaster Bond IV (NSFW) Ft Chaehyun
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Author’s note: A bit of an interlude. I saw the dress and thought. I absolutely have to do a Gala Chapter. You all can blame @somicutie08 for the intro
"I don't know Tiger I am just worried ya know," I said to Chaehyun as she wrapped her tongue around my cock. I groan at her excellent skills, as she massages my balls after a deep gag. She always seems to hit that one spot on my scrotum that makes me cum buckets every time she gives me a blow job. She looked at me with her sad pout and my heart softened because I couldn't ever tell her no.
"Rexy you just hatched a Deviljho single-handedly while everyone was stuck out of town, Facing your peers in a Gala should be easy," Chaehyun said.
I wince because she's right but dealing with people it's not the move man.
"I know I should be but that crowd is not my crowd," I responded. Chaehyun smiled and said,
"That's why you need to show up beside me, You wouldn't leave me alone would you,"
My eyes narrowed at my paramour, and her eyes widened with arousal. she loved playing into my possessive nature as it always served to get her so wet and typically gave into whatever demand she had
"I'd never," I growled. Chaehyun smiled and then said
"Great so we fly out in two and a half weeks. We will need to get you a suit here." she smiled at me knowing she had trapped me so elegantly.
“Oh, tiger before I forget I need to talk to you about something important,” I say and before I finish I feel Chaehyun’s anxiety spike. She looks at me with her scared puppy dog eyes and she does the thing she always does when she's anxious she fucks me feral until both of us black out and pass out.
The next day I woke up before her and I stared at her. She looked so peaceful but also so sexy. I caress her side as she rests and watch as she turns over to look at me with a sultry look that sets my loins on a blaze.
“Hey Rex you ready for the next round,” she says seductively.
“While I would love nothing more than to lock you in a mating press right now I think we should talk. I want to preface this by saying upfront. Nothing is wrong with us. It's just that something has happened to me and I want…no think you should know.
Chaehyun stiffens her erect nipples and stares at me as she does and she begins the lewdest display yet. She opens her legs and begins to play with herself in front of me.
"Okay Rexy but after you fill me up," she says seductively.
Tired of this game I respond with, "No I need to talk to you!"
Chaehyun looks into my eyes and moves towards me.
"Please Rexy right after my worthless pussy needs you. Aren't you gonna fill your worthless barren cumdump?" she asks. Her choice of words is concerning because I know she has been super sensitive about being barren recently.
"Chaehyun look it's not about that I..." Was all I could get out before she was on me like a predator cornering its prey. She was kissing me and pushing all my erogenous zones hoping I would discard my concerns. What she didn't count on (and to be honest neither did I. Was my lust and protectiveness combining.)
"Listen here you slut. You are a dirty slut, but you are so much more than just a cumdump. You are my mate, mine to abuse, but you do not get to talk down to yourself as only some worthless sex object. Now you are going to listen to what I have to say then I am going to breed your pretty pusy do I make myself clear slut?" I growl and command. Chaehyun's mewls as she submits to me. My Lust and protectiveness still lead me to continue. "Do you understand Slut?" I growl in a low tone, "Or will I have to leave you untouched." That sent Chaehyun out of her stupor as she nodded.
"Good. now observe." I said as I showed her the flame wisps. Her eyes went wide when she saw them, but before either of us could talk I flipped her and bent her over taking my hard cock and plunging it deep into her pussy. it was sodden and dripping a puddle under her which made entry easy because this was the most molded and fit to my dick she has ever been. I grab her pillowy tits and begin slow and power thrusts into her cunt.
"Good Girl," I cooed as ravaged her. Her moans are an excellent motivator.
"Wait, Dino. We need to talk about..." Chaehyun began. I quickly cut her off.
"You wanted me to fuck you first, you got me all riled up and I am finishing. I am breeding you and you are going to bear me children." I growled as I continued to piston into her pleasant pussy. her slick drenched my cock as I claimed her. I felt her body tense, any time I mention breeding her, her body goes into this weird but sexy catatonic state where her body milks me for all I am worth. growing tired of doggy I pull out lift her tiny body onto the bed pin her legs up above her ears and put her into mating press.
"Oh God, Breed me," Chaehyun moans. I continue to piston as her cavern squelches and tightens around me. her lower lips drool for me in a lewd mirror of the upper ones as I feel something change about this time. I can't think about it too long as I get caught up in the moment and lose control exploding into her pussy. My orgasm is violent and long as I feel like I am cumming in her for hours (it was 7 or so minutes) but I keep pounding into her. My only thought was filling her with my seed. Chaehyun moans as she climaxes calms down and climaxes again through my orgasm as I just continue to dump rope after rope after rope of cum inside her. My brain is both clear and mush at the same time when the haze of lust finally clears. Chaehyun looks at me satiated and full.
"What happened to you? You never do that?" she said
"You did that. You talking bad about yourself made me angry and horny."
"Well, maybe I should degrade myself more often because fuck, you have never cum this much." I shake my head and get back to the bed to hold her close by spooning her. She looks at my face her eyes widen.
"Oh that changed you, I changed you," she said. she grabs her phone and opens the camera and my eyes have this intense teal sclera that permeates around them. Chaehyun giggled, before saying, "Okay enough cuddles we have work we need to do." I nod and get ready for the day.
over the next week, we prepare for the Gala and I start noticing things about Chaehyun. her energy is sapped a lot easier. she is a lot more aggressive with others and snippy including with me, but also her need to fuck is increased as well, she is almost always demanding more sex. I've had to now spend entire lunch breaks just to satisfy her in addition to our morning and night rituals, and I am worried. thankfully though it doesn't cloud her judgment as she has been excellent in handling the zoo with me and making sure everything is running smoothly, and as we approach the time of the Gala her focus diverts to that.
she's taking the spearhead on most of it so I just stay in the background letting her do her thing. On one of the nights, I managed to get some time and talk to Tony.
"Hey little bro," I greet him after the zoo closes.
Tony "smiles" as he greets me but his head tilts.
"You're mate where is she?"
"She is getting things ready for an event she wants us to go to, so I figured I talk to you as she has been consuming my time a lot lately,"
"Is that wise because she is with child?" Amaterasu (She was also there cuddling with Tony.) I blink repeatedly processing what I just heard
"Oh and how do you know this?" I ask my two Magnamalo friends.
"She is going through the shift," Tony clearly says, "As have you," he adds.
I nod and then say, "Okay then I will go address that right now."
For those unaware megafauna *who only pair-bond once* (specifically females) go through a shift when they become pregnant the first time. Essentially the hormones that promote breeding triple in and their bodies become a baby-making factory for 4 cycles of gestation. this means that typically for those 3-5 years of gestation, all they want to do is breed and nurse their babies and breed again. they become hostile to any nonmale that is a non-mate or familial tie, and other females. (More so to other females) I never considered this though because she was missing the key symptom. lactation
I arrive home to tell her the news and when I arrive and open the door I smell her before I see her. I also smell the smell of cookies but more so the scent of her arousal. to me, it smells like what my brain associates comfort which is smores. her scent drives me wild I feel my cock strain in my pants as I quickly close the door. the sound of squelching in the distance is all I hear along with banshee-level moans.
"Tiger," I call out slightly frightened as to what could be waiting for me in our apartment. the response is bone-chilling.
I hear a growl and the scent begins to become even more intense.
"Rexy left me all alone, and now he's back. Rexy is going to be a good boy and let his tiger ride him right?" her voice takes on a tone I have never heard. somewhere between sultry and wildly deranged. it's as sexy as it is tense. Her eyes have the same teal sclera as mine and she radiates this intense sexual aura that is intense, to say the least. my body gives in to her demands as she approaches. My cock becomes painfully hard and starts to dump arousal into my blood. my mind begins to cloud but I try to fight it.
"Hey Tiger is everything okay?" I ask meekly.
"Yeah. I just was making cookies with ice cream because I have been having all these random cravings and just this desire for my man hit me. I couldn't help it. I have been fucking myself for hours but I can't cum. So I am going to need you and that dick of yours to finish me off." I look behind her to see a trail of her slick on the floor. She brings her hands to my head and lowers my head to be even with hers. she looks me in the eyes, and I see her eyes have become slits her pupils a dark crimson color.
"Don't worry Rexy Mommy will take good care of you," she whispers. I feel my body starting to burn arousal too. I had something I needed to tell her something important, but my memory was fading fast.
"My Rexy is trying so hard to think right now," she says as she strokes my cock. (Wait when did I get naked, when did she get on top of me? When did we get to our bedroom?)
as if hearing my thoughts Chaehyun said, "Rexy don't fight it. Mommy just wants to help her, so please give in." her words sent me over the edge and I blacked out.
The next day I woke up with my collar covered in hickeys and my back with scratch marks. My dick is still rock hard though as I look down at it I scold it.
"Can you go down would you?" but it remains hard nonetheless. I smell bacon and other breakfast foods as I get up and put some boxers on. I walk to the kitchen where Chaehyun only has an apron on, while she cooks breakfast.
"Hey, Daddy. thanks for last night you were an animal." Chaehyun said.
"I groaned and replied, "Well at least you remembered it and enjoyed it. I don't remember anything." Chaehyun smiled before saying
"You came in me four times and passed out after the fifth, but I need another round." she cooed. at that point, the brain fog cleared and I was able to tell Chae.
"Um, Tiger I think you're going through the shift," I state calmly. Chae looks at me and licks her lips
"Um, I don't think so. I am not lactating, and my sex drive hasn't increased. we fuck the same amount." She said as she was actively looking at my crotch and licking her lips. I let that slide and go for a different approach because I know if I press the issue it's going to awaken both of our prey drives and it will evolve into an argument and lead to us fucking for hours on end. We had stuff to do today and I couldn't afford to get behind. Our flight to Korea was tonight. Containing her would be exceptionally difficult. So I play her game
"Okay, do you need any help?"
"Oh thanks, Rexy but no I am pretty much done."
"Okay, I will start the dishes then."
Chaehyun smiles. She knows I hate doing them so she's pleasantly surprised I decide to. As I do the dishes Chaehyun comes from behind and lowers my boxers. My hard cock is quickly caressed by her soft hands.
"Chaehyun, please. We need to pack."
"No we need to fuck then we can pack," she says as she caresses me with her other hand.
"My marks are still present good. that will let them know you're mine," she says luridly. I groan as one of my major verbal pleasure points is her claiming me as hers.
"God yes!" I moan. "I am yours and yours alone," I affirm. Chaehyun tightens her grip on me.
"Good boy I am glad you know your place. by my side, or in me." she cooed while stroking me.
Her arousal is beginning to overwhelm my brain again. I can't afford to black out here but I want nothing more than just to breed her again and again and again. I feel her take off the apron and feel her soft body press into mine.
“Stop fighting it, join me. I know you feel the need as much as I do. Your rationality just makes you fight it. Give in to your instincts and let the animal out,” my mate whispers as she strokes me slowly. “Please I want you with me not the repressed blackout you. I want my intelligent and savage mate to ravage me. not my arousal-drunk partner,” she whispers and her hands wrap around my body, I try to stay focused but it's hard.
“Rexy embrace it stop fighting it please let it take you. You need it.” Chaehyun encourages and I start to feel my body heat up uncontrollably. I see the wisps begin to float around me.
“That's it babe be at peace with an animal inside don't fight it. Let your mind clear and your instincts guide you.” Chaehyun encourages I feel my mind breaking as this weird combination of ideas spill and proliferate through my mind
“Stop fighting give in,” Chaehyun cooed as her voice and hands got braver. My breathing hitches as I feel her envelope me,
“Don't black out stay with me Rexy embrace your instincts,” Chaehyun says as she has me nearing the edge, but before I can freefall she stops touching me. I turn and scowl at her. She smiles as she eats her breakfast. My throbbing cock is dripping precum as I stare at her enticing body. My brain is left overwhelmed by the myriad of thoughts and emotions I feel.
Chaehyun smirks at my discomfort as she takes another bite of her food she says, “We aren't leaving until you fuck me. Not your body, not your mind, not your dick. I'm not leaving until you give me all of you. I know it is hard to bear oneself to another but I need my mate to stop hiding. Show me who you truly are. I won't run.” her lurid whispers echo her words deep into my mind and psyche as aspects of my personality resonate in an almost supernatural hum. Chaehyun finished her plate and sauntered over to me. She caresses my face and gazes into my eyes,
“Come on Rexy aren't you tired of holding back,” and the mental barricade between my primal self and rational self breaks. I kiss her fervently as I lift one of her legs so that I can get a better angle on plowing her pussy and she wraps it around my torso. She smiles
“There he is,” she moans as I impale her on my cock. Her greedy pussy happily accepts though as she drips. She moans sweetly as I slowly plunge deeper and deeper inside. Her hands dig into my back as she tries to anchor herself from the intense pleasure building inside of her.
“You like that? You like how my cock owns your pussy so much that you have to tear me apart,” I groan as I finally bottom out inside of her. She smiles and says,
“Yes, more than anything now fill me with your cum!” I start thrusting into her deeper and harder than I ever have before and I watch her just lose herself to the pleasure. I smirk at her convulsing body as she spasms around my cock.
“You like it,” I ask smugly
“Yes, yes, yes. I can feel you hitting my womb,” she answers. I grin madly as I flood her insides with my seed and she moans overwhelmed. After our little session, we shower together and pack. Throughout the day we mate some more as Chaehyun insists on prancing around nude because she can't get enough of me, but alas we have to stop so we can catch our plane. It sucks because I was balls deep inside of her when my alarm went off.
Chaehyun glares at me as I pull out but I merely say, “Look you wanted to go on this trip. I didn't. I'm more than happy to cancel and fuck you till you're stuffed like a turkey.” I see Chaehyun’s mind fight her body as she is super enticed by the idea. I see her moan as she considers it but her mind wins out and we grab a ride to the airport.
“Ugh, why can't I say no to you,” I groan to Chaehyun who smiles before saying,
“I don't know why you thought you could beat a girl from Busan,” I laugh and kiss her cheek as we settle into the bed on the plane.
Chaehyun smiled and demanded another kiss and another and additional after that before taking my face and smashing our lips together. When she breaks it I see a familiar glint in her eye.
“No, we are not doing that I say before turning over and going to sleep next to her. Chaehyun groans annoyed.
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bogkeep · 1 day
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it's been over a whole month since i had a stupid argument with my parents about driving, a skill that i legally possess but hate doing because i have a special brain illness that makes me fear death and injury, but i'm still chewing over an absurd claim that it's "equally dangerous to go on a 14 hour train ride like you just did". literally how is that more dangerous. in what way. in what world. public transport is nice and good and i like it and i don't have to enter my personal torment nexus
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alottiegoingon · 8 hours
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the last night
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shauna shipman x fem!reader
summary: shauna comes back after 19 months in the wilderness
warnings: shauna and r had a situationship, very suggestive content but nothing explicit, wilderness time, mentions of mental illness (depression, anxiety), r cheating on her actual gf, manipulative shauna (?), angst but happy ending, not proofread
"i can't believe you're leaving me," you complain in a purposely whiny tone, your voice ringing in shauna's ears as you sit across from each other on the bed. she grips her familiar journal while you help her go through her checklist of essential items.
"i'm not leaving you. It's only a week," she murmurs, her head bowed over her journal, but her eyes lift to catch yours. a playful smile dances on her lips, secretly entertained by your antics.
shauna played as the midfielder for the yellowjackets, a girls' soccer team. their recent victory had secured them a spot in the nationals in seattle, and it was all she could talk about.
you were genuinely excited for her, but the thought of spending so much time apart made you anxious. it wasn’t a full week, technically, but you couldn’t help worrying about shauna meeting someone much cooler in a much cooler place.
"remember the last time?" shauna reminisces about her trip to denver five years ago, also for soccer. you were just middle schoolers then, and you were forced to make new friends while she was gone for days. "you found new friends," her voice crackled slightly.
"so we are friends now?" you say, your voice constricting. shauna doesn't look up but you hear her snort, contrasting with her muscles tensing up. the silence settles in and you don't wait any longer to fill it, not wanting to make things any weirder than they already were.
"anyway. it's just not the same now," shauna understood your words perfectly well, especially considering the kind of friendship you had. still, she questioned.
"why's that?" she inquires, her hands absently rubbing the pen against her journal as she finishes her list.
"you know why," three words of yours were responsible for the abrupt stop of her writing. shauna places the journal and pen aside, focusing on you.
"because no one is as cool as me?" she quips, a self-satisfied grin spreading across her lips.
"that's debatable," you retort, feigning skepticism as you mock her with a playful expression.
"you hurt my feelings like that," her false frown deepens as she leans in.
her hands move surreptitiously toward your legs, eventually landing in a gentle and not so innocent touch on your knees. inch by inch, she traces your skin with her fingertips until her full hands were on your thigs and crawling up to your waist.
"i'm so sorry," you try to keep yourself unbothered by her touch but she's smarter. her nose strokes your cheek, stopping to give your upper lip a messy kiss, and she kisses her way town to your neck.
brushing your hair out of the way along with the heart necklace, her teeth gently grazes on your skin.
"nuh-uh. this won't do," her hot breath into your skin makes you shiver. "i have a better idea."
𖠋
everyone remembers where they are when an upsetting event happens. the death of a celebrity, a natural disaster, a medical trauma. you remember, clear as water, where you were when you read the newspaper. walking back home.
it was all over the news. flight 2525, the private plane that lottie matthews' dad had chartered, had disappeared. the plane shauna was in. making everything worse, the news would often use the word 'crash' instead and you couldn't bare the idea.
soon enough, it hit you that the night before her trip was the last time you would ever see her again. the only thing more unbearable than that was the uncertainty; not knowing if shauna was still out there.
after a month of silence, you thought you had your answer.
people don't move on from things like that, not completely. especially if their best friend was envolved. spending your days in bed, skipping meals and not going to class became part of your new routine. you lost track of whether it was day or night, whether the sun was shining or not. your mind was consumed by her.
moving on or not, life goes on and the world doesn't slow down for anyone. after six months, normalcy had returned for most. apart from the parents and a handful of students, the yellowjackets had faded from people's memories, just like their plane. this pissed you off. you barely had time to grieve as the rest of the world rushed forward.
forcing yourself to merely exist, not truly live, you returned to class. like a ghost, you attracted curious glances and avoided them like the plague. after graduation, college was the next step.
a year later, shauna’s parents asked if you wanted anything from her room. something special, or perhaps just to visit. you were certain it wasn’t a good idea, but you went anyway. under her pillow, you found an envelope from brown university—the same school you were attending, the place you and shauna had planned to go together.
that was all it took to break you down into a sobbing mess on her bed.
𖠋
things got better. not perfect, not the way they used to be, but better. you weren't alone anymore but always had to push away the idea of losing all of your friends at once, one in special. luckily or not, college kept you busy.
"have you finished tomorrow's essay? It's so boring I might just drop the class," your girlfriend says, dropping a pile of old books on the cafeteria table and sitting across from you.
"i have dark circles under my eyes, what do you think?" you groan, lifting your head. she leans over the table to kiss your forehead.
"i think you still look pretty, baby."
"thanks, but I'm not letting you copy my work."
"worth the shot," she chuckles, placing two cups of coffee on the table, sliding one towards you.
your plan was to finish that damn essay and be completely free. the cafeteria was buzzing with students, but at least they were minding their own business. that's what you get for studying in a campus cafeteria.
"did you hear what happened to them? i'm so glad they're alive. It must have been so tough," her sudden comment startles you, taking a moment to register.
you swallow a lump in your throat as you glance over your shoulder at the TV, where crowds of people are watching the news: 'yellowjackets rescued'.
"holy shit," you whisper, the shock setting in as you realize you hadn't revealed not only your awareness of their situation but also your complex connection with one of them.
𖠋
a week after shauna got back, her parents had called you your stomach was turning upside down and your anxiety levels were through the roof. you couldn't manage to put your feelings into words.
you knocked on her bedroom door, too anxious to wait, just to announce yourself. for the first time in almost two years, shauna stood before you. she bore a few scars, nothing too severe; her hair had grown longer, losing its waves; her eyes seemed somehow larger, fixed on you as if she had just saw something extraodrinary.
she leapt from the bed, a cautious gaze scanning you, before rushing toward you and embracing you tightly.
her arms wrapped around your shoulders, her fingers digging into your clothes so intensely it almost hurt. you reciprocated, holding her waist tightly to keep her close, unsure when the tears started flowing, but you feeling your shoulders becoming wet.
"hi," she whisper between tears, her voice crackling.
"hi," you echo her. "i thought i would never see you again."
"i know," she sniffs, clinging to you. the last thing she murmurs for the long time you two spent hugging.
shauna was back, but she was much quieter, easily irritated, and frightened by everything. she had every right to feel that way, but you were worried. no one was allowed inches close to her journal and you respected that, encouraging her to write about her feelings.
your finals didn't matter anymore; nothing else did. for the next few weeks, you were constantly by her side. even waiting outside the bathroom door like a loyal dog.
however, you weren't the same as before. you weren't as touchy or intimate, especially after shauna discovered you were dating someone else. she became distant and strange, pushing you away and ignoring your calls.
"hey, I bought you a new book. It's from that author you used to like before..." you stop yourself mid-sentence. "you know."
forcing a smile, you place the book on her desk. her vacant eyes meet yours, but she remains still, lying in bed staring at the ceiling.
"is everything okay?" you ask hesitantly, walking towards her and offering your hand.
the silence lingers but she accepts your hand and joins you.
"shauna?" you say. as soon as she's on her feet, she drops your hand quickly.
"everything is fine," she says sharply.
"right... it's just that you've been acting weird lately," you explain, trying not to upset her.
"in case you didn't know, I was trapped in a cabin in the middle of nowhere for almost two years," she snaps, her body stiffening.
"yes, i know," you say, inhaling deeply. "but I—"
"don't you have to go back to your girlfriend anyway?" she interrupts, glancing at the door and then back at you. she clearly wanted you out.
"no, I don't," you reply, frowning. "is she why you're acting like an idiot?"
she snorts, taking a step forward, her eyes narrowing.
"It's funny how I'm the idiot when you've replaced me with someone else so quickly," you would feel bad thanks to the pain in her voice if it weren't for her absurd words.
"replace you?" you scoff. "she's my girlfriend, shauna."
"and what was I?"
"you were my friend! we were friends."
her face shuts down completely, lips parting as if ready to shout something, but she stops herself. you weren't sure if you agreed with your own words, but it’s too late now.
"i thought you were dead," you say, taking a deep breath to keep your voice steady. shauna, however, seems perfectly fine with letting her voice rise.
"you sure did," she says, shaking her head slightly.
"well, you left me."
"not because I wanted to, you fucking idiot!" she snarls, suddenly pressing her forearm against your collarbones and pushing you backwards. you gasp in surprise as your back hits the cold wall.
"shauna! what are you doing?" you try to push her away, but she’s stronger than you remember and hold you in place.
"do you ever think of me when you kiss her?" she whispers, ignoring your question. her breath is ragged, her chest heaving. she tilts her head slightly, studying your face. then she leans closer, her lips just brushing against yours.
you can hardly make sense of her words, stunned by her sudden change in behavior. your mouth hangs open, but no sound comes out.
"answer me," she growls, pressing her arm harder against you. her jaw clenches, making you yelp, and you immediately whisper a faint 'yes.'
she smirks, crashing her lips into yours. though you hesitated for a moment, you quickly recovered, syncing your movements with her rough rhythm. when you try to pull her closer by the hips, she lets go of your chest, grasping your wrists and pinning them along with you.
the urgent kiss didn't last much longer as she trailed her way down to your jawline with small bites and feral kisses, eventually reaching your neck. in her preferred area, you cry out her name when she sinks her teeth into your skin, drawing blood.
when did she got so into biting?
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floorbe · 2 days
Text
"Desired" [Astarion x Human!Fem!Tav!Reader]
**COMMISSION PIECE** for @jesseapples , thank you sm sm for the comm!! <3
Warnings: p in v s/x, light blood play, biting, first time, hints of Astarion's past / turmoil but not much, hurt/comfort, reader is a virg/n Summary: You'd agreed to meet Astarion after everyone else had retired for the night, but you're starting to have doubts about whether you should.
or; you're a v irgin and worried about not being good enough. Pairings: Astarion / human, fem, tav reader A/N: tbh i wrote for human tav but there aren't many indicators of them when i re-read it?? so go wild! Fandom: Baldur's Gate 3, act one Tiefling party Word count: ~2.4k
~
To say you’re nervous is an understatement. 
The Tiefling’s celebration is still well underway, babbles and laughter ringing across the camp in a much welcome departure from the usual tense silence (other than the occasional grinding of Lae’zel sharpening her blades. Again). You spy Rolan casting lights into the air, preening under the praise of the group gathered around him.
You watch Cal and Lia lean in to say something to him, and judging by the affronted gasp he gives, you assume they were poking fun at him once more. You stifle a laugh into your goblet, amused at their already familiar antics. 
Though not even they could force your mind away from your current worry. Your eyes drag across the camp, attempting an air of nonchalance.The moment your eyes meet a familiar ruby red gaze you know you’ve failed at your little ploy. Astarion’s mouth is hidden behind his goblet, though you could tell by the quirk of his eyebrow that he was sending you a cocky smirk. 
You swallow hard around the bitter wine, swearing that the heat traveling down your throat was swirling up into your cheeks instead. You avert your gaze, your heart giving a small kick of… something. Anxiety? Excitement? You couldn’t tell the difference as a spark flicked in your belly, and the wine’s disorienting effect certainly wasn’t helping.
“And once everyone else is asleep… we get to know each other.”
His words echo in your mind for the umpteenth time tonight. The ridges of the goblet dig into your palm as you grip it, chewing on the inside of your lip. You had accepted, more than accepted, honestly– but thinking about it now.... 
You’d never laid with anyone before, and now you were going to lay with Astarion? You knew admittedly little of his past, and he yours, but he seemed… experienced. Much more experienced than you, if his confidence was anything to go by. Would he even enjoy it with you? Would you fumble? Disappoint him? This was beginning to sound more and more like a bad idea. 
It seems your turmoil wasn’t as well hidden as you’d anticipated, for when you glance in his direction again, he’s still staring at you. His eyebrows have moved into a furrow, his goblet lowered as his head tilts. You lock eyes with him once again, though this time neither of you make a move to look away.
You feel studied under his intense gaze, inspected, as if he was trying to unravel you from where he stood. You attempt a small smile, but if the way his frown deepens is any indicator, it must come out more as a grimace. In a moment he’s striding towards you, face twisted into something of what you think is concern. 
Before he can reach you, a hand grips your wrist and whirls you around. It’s one of the tieflings, Lia, giving you a wide grin as she drags you back to her group. “Saw you sulking over there,” she teases, nudging you as you enter the jovial conversation, “It’s a celebration! I’m not about to let you skulk in the corner!” 
When you cast a glance back to find Astarion, he’s already gone.
In. Hold. Out. In. Hold. Out. 
Your hands are still shaking as you make your way into the forest where you agreed to meet Astarion, the darkness surrounding you offering little comfort. Especially since you knew he could see perfectly fine in it– another bubble of anxiety pops up at the realization that he would see much more of you than you of him. 
“There you are,” his voice startles you as he saunters out from the bundle of trees, a quirked smile on his lips as he stalks closer, “I’ve been waiting. Waiting since the moment I met you.”
He’s in front of you now, piercing gaze freezing you in place as he advances, eyes raking down your form. You repress the urge to curl in on yourself.
“Waiting to…” his smile falters when he focuses on your face again. His eyebrows furrow deeply, searching your face. “...Darling,” he starts after a moment, resting a hand on his hip as he frowns, “I must say, out of all the lovers I’ve taken, you seem rather… unenthused by the opportunity.” 
You flounder for a response, heat swarming into your cheeks again. Your mind is blanking– everything you considered saying while pondering earlier is gone in a blink as he watches you. You can feel your throat tightening, hands gripping the fabric of your sleepwear as you try to find something, anything to say. 
Out of the corner of your eye you swear Astarion’s expression twitches into something softer, almost concerned in your behavior. He seems just as at a loss for words as you.
After a moment he takes a step back, tone considerably quieter, though his face has returned back to the neutral smile he wears, “Performance anxiety, darling? Fear not, we can save our night of passion for another–” he moves to grab his shirt. 
“N-no, no,” you finally sputter out, hands raising in a panic, “I… I’ve never done this before, is all.” 
There’s a pause as you watch Astarion process your words. You can practically hear the gears in his head turning as he looks at you almost incredulously. He lets out a sudden guffaw, head thrown back in amusement, “Oh, nice try, darling. A vision like yourself, untouched? Surely you don’t take me for a fool…” 
His words trail off into silence as he takes in how you seem to shrink even further into yourself. You hear him intake a needless breath before speaking, “...Gods, you aren’t joking, are you?” 
“...No,” you mumble, crossing your arms over your body protectively, “I’m serious.” 
“Oh, don’t tell me you’re one of those ‘I’m waiting until marriage’ people,” he scoffs lightly, though you notice his posture relax a bit at the information.
“No, it just… hasn’t been on my mind, I guess,” you shrug lamely. 
“Sex hasn’t been on your mind?” he asks incredulously, hands on his hips, “Well, you’re certainly not the first that’s said that to me, but I will say that you’ve surprised me, darling.” 
“Why? Do I seem like someone who… partakes often?” 
“...By the Hells. You do realize that every single one of our companions has been trying to seduce you, don’t you?” 
“...Huh?”
“Dear gods,” he groans, running a hand down his face, “We’ll get to that later. Now– shall we head back to camp? If we won’t be laying together, I would like to sleep on a bedroll.”
“Uh, I mean,” you laugh nervously, “Um… If… I mean…” Gods, how do you even say it?
“...Oh,” he sounds after a moment, eyes round with realization, “You– want me to be…?” 
“If you want,” you answer lamely, repressing a groan at how utterly awkward you sound. He’s silent for a moment, prompting you to look back up at him despite the flush on your cheeks. 
He’s wearing a contemplative expression, one you don’t see very often. You can almost hear the swirling thoughts running rampant in his mind, though he stays silent. You think he wants to say something, some thought that’s popped into his mind, but instead he dons his sultry smirk once again. 
“Darling…” he purrs, padding closer to you, “I’d be delighted.” His fingertips are cold against your arm as he traces up your skin, eliciting a trail of goosebumps in their wake. “I’ll be gentle, don’t worry,” he teases, the pads of his fingers stopping momentarily on your neck, tracing over the familiar pinpricks he’s gifted you almost every night.
“I’ll make sure it’s unforgettable,” his smirk breaks into a grin, fangs revealing themselves as he finally cups your cheeks. You fail to repress a shiver at the cold touch, eyes fluttering shut as his breath ghosts over your lips, “You’ll be begging for more when I’ve finished with you…” 
His lips are meeting yours within a moment, the cool feeling mixing wonderfully with your heated skin. His lips move against yours languidly, one hand slipping down your form to rest on your hip, testing. Your hands find purchase on his collar, one sliding up to tangle gently in his hair as you mold your lips against his, embarrassment forgotten. 
You feel his fang clip against your lower lip, drawing a quiet gasp from you at the prick. His tongue licks into your mouth through your parted lips, exploring and tangling with yours. You can’t help the whine that you release into his mouth as his hand slowly lowers from your hip to your lower back, tugging you flush to his form.
You barely notice that his hand that was once cupping your face has joined the other– though you let out a choked gasp as it quickly finds your ass, giving it a playful squeeze. Your head is spinning, overwhelmed with the new sensations in the best way possible, a haze covering your thoughts as he lowers you both onto the ground. 
His lips trail down to your jawline as your back hits the soft grass beneath you, and you instinctively offer your neck to him. You can feel the grin that spreads across his face at the action, and he wastes no time in sinking his fangs into their familiar spot. 
A moan slips from your lips at the brief pain, followed quickly by a soothing swipe of his tongue before he’s suckling at the points. You can feel his body pressed against yours– how his hands trail all over your form as he skillfully disrobes you, exploring each new inch of your skin with a delicate touch. 
It’s dizzying feeling his cold palms grope at your breasts, thumb rolling your nipple over as he sucks on your neck. It leaves you lightheaded, hips bucking instinctively at the feeling. “Needy girl,” he coos against your neck, “We’ll need to stretch you first, darling. Patience.” 
Despite his seemingly collected words, his free hand travels all too eagerly down to your cunt as he resumes sucking at your neck, a moan vibrating against your skin as his fingers slip over your slit. His finger gathers your slick easily before moving up to swirl over your clit, finally releasing your neck as you let out a wanton noise. He pulls back to gaze down at you, cheeks flushed and eyes hooded, all for him.
“Gods, you’re beautiful,” he whispers, running a finger teasingly through your folds, “So wet for me, aren’t you?” Any response you would’ve mustered is banished from your mind as he slips a finger into your heat, curling perfectly to hit the spot that makes you see stars. 
“Oh, there you go, darling,” he murmurs huskily. 
“‘Stari,” you whine, back arching as he hits that spot again, eliciting a delicious squeeze around his finger, “Please…” You barely notice your hands slipping down to tug at his bottoms, chewing on your lower lip to muffle the whimpers leaving your lips at every skilled curl of his finger. 
“So impatient,” he tuts, though he retracts one hand to join yours in slipping off his trousers. You let out a moan at the sight of his cock, precum already dribbling out of his tip– you can’t help how you tighten around his finger again, hips bucking eagerly at the thought of him finally filling you. 
He lets out a deep groan at the feeling, his cock twitching eagerly. “You’re a vision,” he breathes, slipping his finger out of your cunt. You barely have time to whine at the sudden emptiness when you feel his tip prodding at your hole, teasingly bucking to slide along your slit. 
“Ready for me, darling?” he asks, and though he has his trademark smirk you can hear an edge of care in his tone accompanied by a soft squeeze of your hip to reassure you. 
“Yes,” you breathe, looping your arms around his neck readily, “Just… slowly, please?”
“But of course,” he purrs, steadying his cock to prod his tip into your cunt, “Tell me if it hurts, darling. I told you I’d be gentle and I intend to keep my word.”
It stung at first, feeling his length slowly, painstakingly gradually, sink into your wet heat– it was a delicious sting, one you’re sure you’ll be thinking about in the nights to come. Your eyes flutter shut, hands clasping behind his nape as he shushes you soothingly, hands spread across your thighs to keep you spread for him. 
“That’s it, look at you,” he breathes, eyes locked on where his cock inches further and further into you, “Oh, darling, taking me so well, so good…” 
You moan brokenly as you feel his thighs press against the backs of yours, his balls resting against the cleft of your ass as you both adjust to the feeling. You watch his head bow with a silent moan, heavy breaths filling the air before he finds your eyes again. 
He moves slowly, gently, true to his word as he carefully watches your expression. Your mouth falls open in a gasped moan as his cock drags along your walls, stretching you deliciously. You can already feel the knot in your abdomen tightening, only worsened when his thumb swirls around your clit.
“Sh-shit, Astarion–” you pant, back arching. Your thighs tremble with pleasure, weakening as your pleasure climbs and climbs and climbs…
“Close already?” he purrs, doubling his efforts on your clit, “So sweet for me. Come, darling, give in, let me feel you…”
The knot snaps, pleasure washing over you as he works you through your high, cock sinking into you with a groan as his fingers stutter over your clit. He looks beautiful like this, you think amidst the pleasurable haze, eyes shut and mouth fallen open. It’s something you could get used to.
You whine brokenly, thighs trembling as wave after wave of pleasure courses through you, nearing too much but never quite crossing the line. It feels like minutes before you’re coming down from it, almost light headed as your body relaxes against the forest floor. 
“Fuck, Astarion, that…” you pant heavily, still very aware of how his cock is still hard inside you– twitching, throbbing… 
“I hope you’re not spent yet, darling,” he groans breathlessly as you tighten around him, red eyes locking with yours with a downright lewd grin, “After all, I did promise to make this unforgettable.”
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