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chierushi · 1 year

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REVIEW, Part 2: The Prince of Egypt (1998)

Disclaimer: This was written in April of 2021, but couldn't continue due to Tumblr's image limit. They only allowed 10 per post, but now it's 30! Still too little for my review though, so I need to do this in parts. Link for Part 1 here.

Ramses has manifested years of invalidation from his father by making everything grander than what it is now, thinking that this way, he can one up all the past kings of his nation. Moses is walking towards him, seeing more clearly the exploitation around him. Ramses says, “Moses, look!”

Moses is now being bombarded with truth bombs of the past and present: the history written over every pillar, and the current suffering around him.

Then, we see an Egyptian guard doing his duty of exercising his power over a Hebrew, a daily routine. Moses hears it. Miriam hears it. Aaron does too, but his hopelessness made him prefer to stick to the status quo. Like everyone in Egypt, he chooses to ignore. In his case, it is understandable, since he's not in a position of power. Their defiance can be accused as rebellion, and they still fear for their lives. Maybe, some of them have figured out that it’s better living awfully than dying.

Ramses, still babbling about plans of making the palace bigger and grander, is in background. Moses is far away from the chaos but he hears the Egyptian guard and the Hebrew louder. Whether he actually hears the conversation or is imagining the dialogue, we don’t know. He ran towards the unfortunate man being beaten up and tried to rescue him. The slave driver unfortunately fell to his death.

One of them asked, “Who did this?” Somebody answered, “Up there!” Notice this neat switch, Moses seen from top view looking over the commotion, and then to him being beside the Hebrew people, as if he's starting to feel he belongs somewhere else.

He runs to the palace, now with Israelites’ homes in view. A similar occurrence happened prior to this but with Egypt’s statues instead.

Now, it’s Ramses' turn to convince Moses that what they’re doing is just. We hear the future Pharaoh take his place, saying things only God should say.

Young Moses: You saw what happened. I just killed a man.

Rameses: We can take care of that. I will make it so it never happened.

Young Moses: Nothing you can say can change what I've done.

Rameses: I am Egypt! The Morning and The Evening Star! If I say "Day is Night," it will be written, and you will be what I say you are! I say you are innocent.

Moses runs away from Egypt for good this time. He took off all his accessories but his ring. Somewhere in his journey, he saved some girls from bullies, which happen to be daughters of the high priest of the land. There, he found the woman they imprisoned. Her name is Zipporah.

In Midian, it’s as if he’s born again. He was stripped naked, literally, even having the same red blanket covered around him. Jethro, the high priest, repeated the Egyptian princess’ words of him being a blessing. “You should not be a stranger to this land,” he says.

In Midian, Moses didn’t need much effort to be recognized, as opposed to his upbringing. Jethro even reprimanded him for not considering his actions honorable. He told him to “look at his life through heaven’s eyes,” pushing Moses further to keep in mind the grand scheme of things, and refuse to only see himself.

This song is the most religious one in the movie. I love how it’s not imposing of Christian faith. Heaven’s eyes can mean a divine being for a believer, and a new perspective for agnostics. As humans, we can all agree that life is not only about you.

Then, we see Moses being dragged by a sheep to a cave, leading him to The Burning Bush.

This is my favorite scene! Moses went through all “comforting” words from his adoptive parents and his brother, but they’re all self-serving. Jethro, though, did welcome him dearly, but it’s only a glimpse of heaven. Here, in The Burning Bush, Moses did not just feel loved and recognized; he's also chosen. God showed him this won’t be an easy path to take, but He will be with him.

This is the first time we see Moses shed a tear.

I’m amazed at how this was a celebration for Moses. If I were him, I’d be terrified to ask the most powerful nation-slash-oppressor to let their slaves go, pretty much at how Zipporah reacted when Moses told her what happened. She says to him, “But, Moses, you are just one man.”

Moses: Look at your family. They are free. They have a future. They have hopes and dreams, and the promise of a life with dignity. That is what I want for my people. And that is why I must do the task that God has given me.

I admire that he’s not doing this just because God told him so. This is not blind obedience. He wants this to happen even before he left Egypt; he just doesn’t have the willpower to do so.

Moses decides to go back to Egypt. Ramses welcomed him warmly, even when the priests reminded the Pharaoh of his crimes. Moses was declared pardoned. His words are out of love, at least on surface, but Moses knows this power and privilege is coming from an evil system, and should be allowed no further.

Ramses brings Moses to a private room, where the Hebrews are seen doing their work. Look at the difference in their perspectives. Moses saw injustice below, but when asked what Ramses saw, he looked straight, seeing only the beauty of Egypt. We see a bigger statue of himself beside his father’s statue.

Rameses: He was a great leader.

Moses: His hands bore the blood of thousands of children.

Rameses: Hmph. Slaves.

Moses: My people. And I can no longer hide in the desert while they suffer at your hands.

Rameses: So, you have returned, only to free them.

Ramses fights back his emotions as he slowly accepts that Moses won’t be going back as his brother, but as a defiant of his kingdom. His eyes show his compassion towards Moses. I particularly love the switch in this scene. The long pause, the short zoom in, and music accompaniment made it much better. This is the first time he looks at Moses with these eyes.

A reiteration of an earlier scene: the characters separated by pillars and shadows as tension rises. Moses is in a much brighter spot than Ramses, too. Oddly enough, the Pharaoh is not at his throne. The rift really is between brothers.

To prove that Ramses is a better king than his father, as what he does to all other things, he commanded for labor to be doubled.

As Moses leaves, Aaron argues with Moses because it seems like he made the situation worse.

Moses: I didn't mean to cause you more pain. I'm just trying to do as God told me.

Aaron: God? When did you start caring about any of us? In fact, Moses, when did you start caring about slaves? Was it when you found out that you were one of us?

Zipporah: Don't listen to him.

Moses: No, he's... he's right. I did not see because I did not wish to see.

Aaron did make sense. He obviously has put a lot of thought into this. But aren’t we all like Moses? Masquerading our actions as God’s commands but in reality, we’re just being selfish? Caring only when it affects us, or anyone we hold dear?

Miriam comes at the right time to knock some sense into these two.

Miriam: I have been a slave all my life, and God has never answered my prayers until now. God saved you from the river, he saved you in all your wanderings, and even now he saves you from the wrath of Pharaoh. God will not abandon you, so don't you abandon us.

Moses sees Ramses on a boat. He comes near, pleading his case once more. His brother, now with newfound anger, commands the guards to bring Moses to him. God made his presence felt by turning the river into blood. We see Moses unaffected by it as he stands in the waters.

This is probably my favorite line from the movie:

Aaron: But, Moses, d-didn't you see what happened? The priests did the same thing. Pharaoh still has the power over our lives.

Moses: Yes, Aaron, it's true. Pharaoh has the power. He can take away your food, your home, your freedom. He can take away your sons and daughters. With one word, Pharaoh can take away your very lives. But there is one thing he cannot take away from you: your faith. Believe, for we will see God's wonders.

God didn’t discourage Moses when He told him Pharaoh would not give in to his pleas. God assured Moses that He is all-powerful and all-knowing, that He knows what He's doing and the events that will transpire. He didn’t hide the challenges of the task, too. And Moses is a big scaredy-cat, but He's a big believer, too. There is a grain of truth in our fears, but in this story, we are taught to look at ourselves in heaven’s eyes. In the grand scheme of things, there is a Higher Being.

As plague after plague happens, we see Moses and Ramses mainly on the montage. While this is about God wreaking havoc to the oppressors of His people, this is also a grapple between two brothers. The movie does not intend to steal the spotlight from God, but simply recognizes the human factor behind all this.

The color themes of these characters are more apparent than ever. Notice the shift: earlier, the bright colors belonged to the Egyptians due to their sun god Ra. Now, Moses has it, as God reclaims sovereignty.

Now we have arrived to probably the most hauntingly beautiful scene from the movie:

The last plague is the most important of all, for it also speaks of Christ’s salvation. The film didn’t dwell much into the details of God’s command to mark the doorposts of their houses with blood, which I think is good for general audiences. There’s so much to talk about here, but I love that even from the limited screen time of this part, it delivered an important message: no one, not the favored, not the richest, not the most powerful, is saved from the wrath of God. Only those protected by the blood of the Lamb will be saved.

Of all the depictions of the Exodus story, this is the only one that showed the angel of death as white and less scary. It was eerie, though. It helps the viewer to take in the fact that while death brings misery, in this case, it also brings justice. The goodness of God is shown as He halts the evil nation that’s hounding his people.

Moses tries to offer his condolences to Ramses. In a low voice, Ramses gave his approval to let the Hebrews go.

Moses should be celebrating, right? He got his wish. But the movie didn’t intend to focus only on the macro level. The storytelling is from the point of view of humans, specifically, two brothers who are in an arduous path of leading their nation. We have to remember that this is Moses’ nephew, too. For justice, his brother's son has died. The family he grew up with, who is unfortunately the Pharaoh, is mad at him. We see him mourning alone.

Now that they have the Pharaoh’s Yes, the Hebrews start packing, and going. But we all know the story. Ramses changed his mind and chased after them. While the pillar of fire is protecting the Hebrews from the Egyptian army, they have a boundless sea on the other end. When there’s nowhere to go, what do you do? We barely hear Moses speak religiously in this movie (he’s usually just goofy), but here he is, remembering God’s one command to him: “With this staff, you shall do my wonders!”

Aaron, the most skeptic of them all, now in the most terrifying miracle God has done in their lives so far, didn’t hesitate to step forward first and go through the parted sea.

Ramses waited for the pillar of fire to go out and chase God’s people. When the pillar went out and saw the sea was still parted, he paused. Should he keep chasing them? "The sea is still parted, why not?" he maybe thought. The fact that this phenomenon is caused by God didn't occur to him, most likely. He pursued the Hebrews and met his demise. The army followed the Pharaoh and got drowned in the sea, while the Hebrews got out of it at just the right time.

Zipporah: Look. Look at your people, Moses. They are free.

As the movie ends, we see Moses, descending from Mount Sinai with the ten commandments, overlooking his people. He takes a good look at the nation of Israel. They’re free now. Yes, they’re still under a High Power, but they’re under new Management. They’re now in God’s hands.

"I am who I am. Say this to the people of Israel: I am has sent me to you. Say this to the people of Israel: Yahweh, the God of your ancestors—the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob—has sent me to you. This is my eternal name, my name to remember for all generations." (Exodus 3:14)

#princeofegypt #prince of egypt #christian #christianity #god #moses #exodus #chierushireviews

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fluffy-critter · 2 years

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#crosspost #busybee

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samdotdocx · 3 years

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A very long-winded essay about why I love Night in the Woods and The Ramayana makes me Big Mad ft. Lets Talk About Mental Illness™

So I was in this class called 'The Ecology of Language". Excellent class, 10/10 would recommend - and especially relevant in the Indian context in particular, but that's a topic for another day.

One of the things we talked about was the concept of 'relatibality' in media, which, I'm sure we can all agree is a large component of contemporary character or story-line development. Considering the context of modern readers, what that sometimes ends up looking like (in our society that is built on constantly being told we are lacking, and the subsequent need to satisfy manufactured desires), is some wonderfully nuanced characters in stories stories that are three-dimensional, well rounded, and well developed and written. It's pretty great. And sometimes, what that means is that we have excellent characters that don't conform to the standard 'protagonist' stereotype. They might not even be 'good' (this is NOT a villain-apologist post). In fact, they might be complete idiots. They might be the people in stories who make all the wrong choices.

One such relatable character is Mae, and it's because she's an unmitigated train-wreck.

Anyone who knows the game probably knows what I'm talking about when I say the illustration style and character designs are gorgeous. Anyone who's ever dissociated probably knows what I'm talking about when I say that illustration style and character design were excellently used to create the sort of subliminal, surreal state of Mae's mind. And as you play the game, you see how that state of mind plays with the other characters, and - spoiler - it isn't great.

This is the first of the relatable aspects of Mae’s character; there are people around her who love her and are worried about her, but at the same time, are angry and irritated about her behaviour. At what point does it become too much to ask of those around you to forgive all your continuous and repetitive mistakes? Even if you have a good reason for it, mental illness is not an excuse for being exploitative, even if it is unintentional. Mae is not trying to hurt the people around her, but she constantly needs emotional labour from them – it’s exhausting, and people’s patience is going to run out eventually, as is their right.

Another aspect of this behaviour is the lack of reciprocity, an example of this being when Bea’s mother died of cancer – and Mae didn’t even notice.

There are several instances of Mae’s thoughtless behaviour throughout the game; she gets completely wasted and makes a scene at the party, gets jealous of of Greg and Angus because they’re leaving the town without her, and ends up destroying the radiator Bea was supposed to fix, getting her in trouble.

The thing is though, that Mae is given the opportunity to fix her mistakes.

A large part of relatability is the want so see yourself in a character. Mae is relatable to me because there are several circumstances and events in our lives that match up, but more than that; the game is an interactive visualization of her healing process. Her nine steps, if you will. She is given a second chance – and that chance is hard won, particularly in the context of the game.

Mae talks about feeling like she’s falling behind, of knowing that she is, in a way, wasting an opportunity that was a privilege in the first place, especially considering her family’s financial situation – but at the same time, being literally unable to help herself. And the aspects of the gameplay that hint at the supernatural elements of the story possibly being a figment of Mae’s imagination – well. All us depressed losers know what it's like to not be able to trust your own judgement and point of view. She talks about why she dropped out of college, and her description of the dissociation, and the mental and emotional deadening that it causes is spot on and so well represented.

It underscores the point that the logical brain knows that mental illness is an illness like any other – but the emotional brain doesn’t care.

The game does a brilliant job of laying bare the realities of middle class life, and makes painfully clear the fact that, at that level, it doesn’t matter how difficult things are for you. The world isn’t going to wait for you to get back on your feet.

Mae’s mental state and the limitations it imposes on her cultivates a state of extreme frustration. Again, relatable. It’s an understated aspect of illness of any kind; the anger at yourself, and how that anger carries over into a lot of things in your day to day life. After a point, it becomes a habit. Mae does this too; she's belligerent, and instigative, and unrepentant of consequences, because anger blinds you.

It's not how things will always be. I have the privilege of hindsight, so I can say that with authority. But, this isn’t the kind of thing that ever fully leaves you, either. If you break a kneecap, it’s going to bother you for the rest of your life, and similarly, mental illness has a ‘no return, no refund’ policy. So you grow up, and you try to adapt those habits and impulses into a more positive context. Recycling, right? Maybe you set your sights on things that actually deserve your anger, and you go from there. You find people who, for their own reasons, perhaps or perhaps not related to your own, are angry.

And you don’t understand the people who are not.

A large part of the anger and frustration surrounding mental illness is due to the stigma surrounding it. It’s frustrating to be so powerless and dependent, but this is exacerbated by the attitude of ‘it can’t be that bad’, which makes it so difficult to reach out, to be able to say, ‘I need a break’ – and actually get one. This is an attitude that carries over to a lot of other issues as well, and the worst part is – we are surrounded by people who are okay with it, who believe in and support that mentality.

The myth of Sita, for example. She is a strong female figure in Indian mythology, who overcomes her circumstances to live a ‘good’ life, and for all intents and purposes, is a hell of a role model.

But that’s the thing; her life wasn’t good, was it? She was supposed be a goddess reincarnated, she should have been powerful, and respected, but instead she is reduced to ‘wife’ – and everyone today is fine with it.

I respect her immensely for the choices she made; marrying for love was her choice, going into exile with her husband was her choice. She was the paragon of virtue, of 'wifeliness', of kindness – she chose her husband over everyone and everything else, including herself, as was expected of her. But yet – she couldn't win his trust or respect. It should not even have needed to be won.

It’s commendable the way she takes it all in stride, but why did she? She was kidnapped and held captive for years, entirely against her will, and her husband's response to that is to force her to walk through fire to prove her ‘purity’ – and she does it. And she stays with him after, and I cannot understand the depths of her patience and forgiveness, because I would have been livid, and I want her to be so too. I’m furious for her, because Ram was not just her husband, he was also the king, and his later verdict to exile her, alone, while heavily pregnant, his readiness to condemn her based on speculation and public sentiment, was not just a verdict against her, it was against every woman in his kingdom who had ever been victimised.

Sita became a martyr to the modern feminist movement – if she could not be angry on her own behalf, we will do it for her. But at the same time, she is still relatable, because we are held to a slightly lesser degree of the same expectations. There are always going to be aspects of things that you relate to. ‘Big Mood’ culture is a strong indicator of the human ability to empathise, especially with characters that you like, or respect.

Sita’s world, I imagine, was run by the expectations her society and community had of her, and maybe she didn’t even have the liberty to be angry. Who is responsible for portraying her in passive acceptance of her fate? Is that representation reliable? Would the story have been different had it been written by a woman?

I can't remember a time when I was not angry, especially about things like this. I am always ready to fight, and I think the same goes for so many other people today, sometimes to our detriment. I cannot imagine a world where that was not at the very least an option. Not necessarily the best option, - but Sita’s world was very different to ours. Even with centuries between us, we’ve just gotten over angry and depressed women being labelled as ‘hysterical’ and subsequently being locked away. What is it like, to have to be calm and careful in response to being treated like this? This care in response may not be an overt requirement anymore – though the fact remains that society will not take you seriously if you become hysterical - but shouldn't you, at the very least, be able to rely on the support of other people in the same boat?

That is the main difference in these stories, and another main point of relatability to me; Mae, like myself, had a support system. Sita did not. Mae was selfish and demanding in so many ways, and required a lot of time and patience and healing before she was able to give back, but she got there eventually because she was able to put herself first. She fought for herself, and when she couldn’t, she had other people to fight for her. Night in the Woods represents the intersection of oppressed minorities and community with their portrayal of Mae, Greg, and Angus in particular, and the importance of community support – and, the difference between geographical community, and communities formed through camaraderie and actual unity. And so does the Ramayana - except, where was Sita’s community? Where were her sisters, or her parents, when she was abandoned in the woods, and later when she committed suicide? We are well aware, in the modern day, of the state of mind that causes people to kill themselves, and yet that is a part of the story that we never talk about. Where were her people then?

What would have happened if she had been more like Mae, and put herself first instead of bleeding herself dry for people who never respected her, and would never do the same for her?

People relate to personalities. They relate to choices, and circumstances, and habits, and it is neither a good nor a bad thing, to be relatable or not. Sita will be highly relatable to people who, like her, were governed by their circumstances, and were screwed over despite their best efforts. People who felt they couldn’t, or shouldn’t exercise their power and agency. Sita’s death was at odds with her strong personality, and so was her deference to her fate on many occasions, but there are a lot of people out there who will relate to the feeling of simply wanting things to be over. Mae on the other hand; she’s a steamroller, and she doesn’t stop. There’s a reason her character is a cat, and jokingly referred to as feral in the game. She is persistent, she is growing.

[1] In Defence of Kaikeyi and Draupadi: a Note – by Fritz Blackwellhttps://www.jstor.org/stable/23334398?read-now=1&seq=1#page_scan_tab_contents [2] https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2015/10/emergency-room-wait-times-sexism/410515/

#ramayana discourse #night in the woods #sita #tw suicice #tw mental illness #mae borowski #spam-by-sam

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mlwritingprompts · 3 years

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Not a prompt. Sorry if this offends you or anyone.

I am new to the ML show and I am utterly annoyed at how idiotic Hawkmoth’s Emilie plot is.

Like, why!?

Why did they think that this “villain guy wants to rescue a loved one” cliche is good for this story!?

I would have believed this more if not for three tiny problems.

One, Gabriel is a freaking billionaire. A self-made billionaire to boot. Meaning, he didn’t simply inherit his fortune, but he possibly climbed over the metaphorical bodies of others, without care or sympathy, to reach what he did today.

Two, he is still a jerk to everyone he interacts with, and at best, he is just cold and uncaring, even towards his own son. Even more so as a supervillain.

Three, he is so goddamn OP with his miraculous but still loses to two teenagers who not only are suposedly having less experience than him, but have limits imposed on them solely due to age.

The worst thing is that the series doesn’t even need to happen at all if he was acting smarter.

Let alone getting the miraculouses, if he was smarter, Emilie’s health would have been restored before the series even began.

Just upset a doctor/nurse, Akumatise them and give them the power to cure any and every illness, magical or not. BOOM! The entire show is over before it begins! The guy is supposed to be a clever fashion designer, but it’s as if his IQ drops to -100 when planning most of the time.

If the writers want me to believe that Gabriel is still tormenting Paris so he can save his wife, they better give him better plans.

Because at this point, Gabriel is just making chaos for the sake of chaos, not for his plot device of a wife.

Literally. There is NOTHING stopping him from just making an Akuma that can heal her. He can create Akuma that destroy the fucking universe and fuck with time. There is literally nothing stopping him.

And like, literally. He doesn’t even give a single shit about his own son, but we’re expected to believe he cares about his wife???

The writers don’t care about the plot making sense, the only thing they care about is making money. If they actually cared about telling a story, season 1 2 and 3 would have each moved the story forward not just with the plot, but with the characters.

But no. Everything resets at the end of the episode, and nothing matters, and Gabriel just keeps doing the same thing over and over again.

#not a prompt #swearing tw #ml writers salt #ml writers guillotine #miraculous ladybug #ML salt #submission #Show!Miraculous #Show!Marinette #Show!Adrien

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enderspawn · 3 years

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It's alright if u don't wanna answer this cuz this argument gets people really riled up but do you think c!Techno is a tyrant or nah?

Cuz many c!techno apologists argue that he isn't just cuz he's an anarchist but I've also read a lot of essays that go against it and it'd be really interesting to see ur opinion on this

i think he, in some contexts, can most definitely be called tyrannical, yes. a tyrant? no.

to avoid spamming ppl w discourse we've all def heard before (and bc this ended up MASSIVE (like 2.3k ish), but fairly in depth bc i didnt wanna speak out of bad faith and wanted to be EXPLICTLY clear-- oops), the rest will be under readmore

so heres the thing i want to preface: i used to really LOVE c!techno. i joined beginning of s2, right when exile started, and he was arguably my favorite character. since then though i've fallen out with him a LOT, to the point i almost... actively despite him at times (though mainly in a toxic kind of way which i can acknowledge is flawed).

in short, his actions started to speak louder than his words and i lost investment in his personal character struggles because of the actions he took (doomsday was my breaking point. i get feeling angry and betrayed, as well as seeking revenge against lmanberg, but his actions went too far for me to CARE and it hurt so many more characters as well.)

so when i speak, i come from a place of disliking him but also somewhat understanding the position c!techno apologists come from: i used to be one of them myself.

NOW, do i think he's a tyrant? no. for reference in my analysis, i try to look up the definition of terms to make sure they are utilized properly. while "tyranny" and "tyrannical" can have multiple uses, tyrant itself is a more specific term. to combine the top two definitions, a tyrant is referring to "an extremely oppressive, unjust, or cruel absolute ruler (who governs without restrictions, especially one who seized power illegally.)"

techno's position as an anarchist, imo, DOES indeed make him unable to be a tyrant. tyrants are rulers with very clear power over others from a structural way. anarchists are about the lack of structure or power over others and instead viewing the people around you as equals in power.

in forming the syndicate, they very explicitly worked to not designate a leader and instead make it so that no one would have any power over the others systemically. techno may have taken a integral role, yes, but it doesn't make him suddenly "the leader", its a role that wouldve had to be filled by someone (even if it was democratic to decide who to invite, they'd need someone to hand over the invite itself yknow? like no matter WHAT there needed to be A ROLE)

one could argue that he IS a leader in the shadow hierarchy of the syndicate (which, yes, is a real and professional term used in management courses despite sounding like it comes from a 4kids yugioh dub) in that everyone CONSIDERS and looks to him a leader without him having any actual structural basis behind it, but to argue that allows him to be a tyrant is in bad faith i believe. especially because to the people he would be "ruling", he ISNT oppressive, unjust, or cruel. they are his friends and support network and critical for a lot of his personal development (since feelings of betrayal and trust issues are critical to his character and why he acts the way he does). I wish we were able to SEE this develop more, but oh well.

but like i said: tyrant is fairly specific in definition. TYRANNY, and thus TYRANNICAL are not as limited. I've discussed their definitions here. originally, i made that post because i was angry at a take i had seen that claimed that, like you said, because techno was an anarchist and not part of any government or leadership position, he couldn't be tyrannical. to which i heartily disagree.

for something to be tyrannical, they simply must have an overarching/oppressive power over someone or something. it would not be inaccurate if i were to say that something is "under the tyranny" of a concept, because what it means is that something is under the power of another thing/concept. you can frankly call anything tyranny if it is widespread/overarching and you don't like it. mask mandates? tyranny, its forcing me to act in "rigorous condition". hell, theres even such things as tyranny of the majority in which people agree too much on one thing and it gives them unfair power or tyranny of the minority where people with minority opinions have too much power (thats a very grossly oversimplified definition of both, but it covers the base idea well enough for my point)

the point im making above isnt meant to be taken as "anything can be worked to be defined as tyranny thus it is a meaningless claim", it is that tyranny (and again, thus tyrannical) are very open and nonrestrictive terms.

to make it easier to define, alongside the definitions provided i want to add an explicit clause that is (imo) implied in the original definition: tyranny is... well, bad. that is to say if someone has power over a group but literally everyone is fine with it and agrees to it, its not tyranny. thats just a group of people getting along and one happens to have power over another. a leader does NOT equal a tyrant (as discussed above), so leadership should not be equated with tyranny.

thus as an example: wilbur acting as president (before the election) may have been "unelected" with power over his citizens, but no one was upset with that power. thus, he is not a tyrant and not acting tyrannically (as well as the fact his power was, arguably, NOT rigourous or absolute but thats another topic for another time). SCHLATT however IS a tyrant, as his power was absolute (he did not consult his cabinet) and forced people to comply instead of them complying willingly, thus he was acting tyrannically.

now to finally get to the damn point of this essay: where does c!techno lie? honest answer? it depends slightly on your perspective, but it depends a LOT on the future of the syndicate.

techno is incredibly clear in his goals: no governments, no corruption. in fighting with pogtopia, he is actively working to topple a tyranny-- he isn't tyrannical for doing that.

when he strikes out on nov 16th, it is because he opposes them forming a new government. when they oppose him and disagree, he launches an attack against them. is this tyranny? maybe, but probably not. he IS trying to impose his own physical strength and power (as well as his resources) over the others to stop them from doing what HE doesn't want them to do.

however its more nuanced than that:

1. hes lashing out emotionally as well as politically. he feels betrayed by those he trusted and he believed that they would destroy the government then go (i'm ignoring any debates on if he did or did not know that they planned another government, though it is a source of debate). but typically idk about you but i dont call tyranny for someone fighting with another person.

2. he also may be acting with good intent again, in HIS EYES. if tubbo was part of manburg, whos to say he wont be just as bad? he, in his pov, is likely trying to stop another tyrant before they rise.

3. and finally, and tbh the most damning from any perspective: he gives up. he quickly leaves then RETIRES without intent to try and attack again until he is later provoked. tyranny is defined by it not just being power, but power being USED. if he doesn't use his power to try and impose any will, then he's not tyrannical.

Doomsday I am also not going to touch very in depth on for much of the same reasons. My answer is again a "maybe", depending on the weight you personally place on each issue:

1. he's lashing out as revenge for the butcher army and as revenge against tommy for "betraying" him (though this one we explicitly know he was ignoring the fact tommy did not want to go through with it, however he still did trust and respect tommy regardless so his feelings are understandable anyway)

2. he sees new lmanberg as corrupt and tyrannical (which is undeniable: house arrest for noncompliance, exile without counsel, execution without trial, etc), and thus obligated to destroy it

but also, theres the implicit understanding he's doing this to send a message: do not form a government, or else. its a display of force that also works to warn others unless they want a similar fate. phil even explicitly states that he is doing so to send that message, so one could assume techno is doing the same alongside his personal reasoning listed above.

what i just described is the use of a oppressive and harsh (physical) power in order to gain compliance from people (that compliance being 'not making a government'). does that sound familiar? exactly. it follows the definition(s) of tyranny given previously. technoblade is acting in a way that is, by very definition, tyrannical.

so the debate shifts: is he valid in doing so because he is trying to PREVENT corruption and tyranny. like i said, new lmanberg was undeniably corrupt at points. i held nothing against techno for trying to topple manburg, so does that apply to new lmanberg as well? short answer: i dont know. it depends on your specific opinion of what is acceptable. its like the paradox of tolerance: to have a truly tolerant society, you have to be intolerant of intolerance. to have a truly non-tyrannical society, do you need to have a tyranny enforcing it?

personally (and bc im a lmanberg loyalist /hj) i say it is. regardless of the corruption of new lmanberg, they are also giving a threat to EVERYONE. even those who are innocent, they are presented with the exact same threat and rule set: if you make a government, you will be destroyed.

(which, small divergence here, is part of why debating c!techno is so frustrating. so many times you end up hitting a "well it depends on your political views" situation and there ISNT a correct answer there. im here to analyze characters for fun, not debate political theory)

so: the syndicate then. this is where this debate really "took off" and i think its due to one very specific miscommunication about its goals and plans. the syndicate, upon formation, declares itself to stand against corruption and tyranny. when they are found, the syndicate would work to destroy it. so heres the golden question: what do THEY define as corruption and tyranny? if you were to go off c!techno's previous statements, seemingly "any government" is a valid answer. however, he also states he's fine with people just being in groups together hanging together.

what then DEFINES A GOVERNMENT for them? what lines do they have to sort out what does "deserve to be destroyed" and what does "deserve to exist freely"

this is a hypothetical i like to post when it comes to syndicate discourse:

i have a group of people. lets say 5 or so for example. they all live together and build together. any decisions made that would impact the entire group they make together and they must have a unanimous agreement in order to proceed, but otherwise they are free to be their own people and do their own thing. when you ask them, they tell you they are their own nation and they have a very clearly defined government: they are a direct democracy. does the syndicate have an obligation to attack?

there is absolutely no hierarchy present. there is no corruption present. but, they ARE indeed a government. is that then inherently negative? my answer is fuck no (see the whole "difference between a tyrant and a leader" thing above).

but THATS where the issue of this discourse LIES. in some people's eyes, the answer to that is YES. techno's made it clear "no government" is his personal view, but does that spread to the syndicate as a whole? do they act preemptively in case it DOES become corrupt? is it inherently corrupt because its a government, regardless of how it is ruled? the fact of the matter is because of how little we've seen the syndicate work as a SYNDICATE, we don't know that answer. so we're left to debate and speculate HOW they would act.

if the syndicate were to let that government exist, then they are not tyrannical. they are showing that they are working to stop tyranny and corruption, just like in pogtopia again.

if the syndicate were to destroy/attack that government, then they are tyrannical. simple as that. they are enforcing a rule of their own creation without any nuance or flexibility under the threat of absolute destruction.

miscommunication in debates comes, in my opinion, in the above. of course theres more points of nuance. for example:

would the syndicate allow a government like i had described with early lmanberg, where there is an established hierarchy but everyone in the country consents to said leadership? on one hand, there is no tyranny or corruption present which is what they are trying to work against. on the other hand, theres more a possibility of it occuring. perhaps they'd find a middle road between the two binary options of "leave or destroy" i am presenting, such as checking in occasionally to ensure no corruption occurs.

but if they were to destroy it without, for lack of a better word, "giving it a chance" they would be, in my opinion, tyrannical. they would be going aginst their words of opposing corruption and instead abusing their power to gain compliance.

your/others opinions may differ, again it depends on if you see it as worth it to possibly stop future tyranny or if a hierarchy is INHERENTLY a negative thing.

part of the reason so many blog gave up this debate, beyond not getting very clear answers for the syndicate, is because of the nuance present. there. is. no. right. answer. every single person will view it differently, because there is no universally agreed upon truth of right or wrong here. BUT, i hope this helps shed some light on the discussion and my thoughts on it

#dream smp #mcyt #techno #syndicate analysis #YEAH IM MAINTAGGING WHAT OF IT #also i-- idk if it should be crit tagged? i tried to be as fair and open as possible #lemme know what yall think #ANYWAY ANON IM SO FUCKING SORRY THIS THING ENDED UP 2.3K WORDS LONG #I JUST RLLY WNATED TO BE THOUROUGH AND AS FUCKING CENTRIST /HJ AS POSSIBLE FJDKSLFJ #its very nuanced and theres no right answer but you sure as hell know mine now #answered #anon #im at work rn im gonna get fucking fired for this FJDKSFJKL #/HJ HOPEFULLY IN THAT I AM AT WORK BUT I WONT GET FIRED #og post #(jeb bush voice) please clap

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kichimiangra · 3 years

Text

So who else thinks that Billy Hatcher from Billy Hatcher and the Giant Egg should have a 2 or 3 volume manga series where he has an edgy Shadow the Hedgehog rival who is the bird themed Magical Boy Warrior for the Crow baddies?

Like, I already figured out his backstory.

Him and Billy where friends but he moved away but they promised to stay friends. This incel friend though refused to make new friends cuz y'know, even apart he's still got Billy as his BFFFF Forever so he's fine with his self imposed loneliness but not really. Especially because him and Billy agreed to hang out once summer vacation starts and he can Visit his old home town and see Billy.

It's the first day of summer vacation and Billy and his canon friends made plans to spend it doing this tour thing where they're going to visit dynamic places (based around the levels in the game like circus park, or the frozen mountain etc) and he wakes up late completely forgetting that his Incel friend would be visiting and was suppossed to pick him up from the train station but is also going to be late to meet up with his friends to hop on the tour bus with them so he runs off to meet his canon friends. Luckily nothing's wrong with this because the readers don't know about incel friend yet!

So it's like the opening FMV cutscene. He goes to his friends, they chide him for being late, he saves a chicken and gets usekai'd to chicken world to became a chicken based magical girl and rescue the 6 Chicken Elders and find the wish granting Giant Egg and stop Dark Raven.

So plot line 1 is the Forest Village level where Billy doesn't have the chicken suit but has to find it and maybe there's some chicks who are like "why would our chicken God Menie-Fudie have an outsider don the legendary suit? Screw you outsider we'll find it first and save out own village!" And Billy has to go after them and prove he's brave protecting then from the boss and this is how he gets his first emblem of bravery, the suit, and saves the first Elder. Boom. Adapted for comic. Incel friend is not in this part of the story. If he is it's vaguely hinted at.

Next is Dino Mountain and we have Billy meeting up with Rolly in the story now who already got her suit to be the magical girl chicken guardian of the level. She's not doing a super good job combating the local Crows in the area because she's still the pure bubbly character who needs to get a quick arc where she learns sometimes you gotta FIGHT for peace and not just ask for it. She DOES defeat the area boss by being compassionate to the resurrected dinosaur who is being forced to fight for the crows and through said compassion turns on the crow boss and Rolly gets her emblem of courage for having the courage to determine when to fight and when to care, even if it seems more difficult. Unlike the game Rolly stays behind to guard Dino Mountain so the immediate cast doesn't get too big. Before facing the boss though there's the "Rolly kidnapped by the crows" plot which all the "Friends kidnapped" plots are orchestrated by Incel friend who was also brought to chicken land. Depending on how open vs hiding in the shadows he is Billy just thinks he's been kidnapped by the crows or some shit.

(Yes I am aware that Rolly's level is Pirate Isle but I really wanted her to use the power of love and friendship on the giant dinosaur skeleton and really it doesn't make much difference where his friends get picked up honestly...)

The next place is Pirate isle and I haven't decided what happens here but second verse same as the first. He meets up with Chick Poacher, Chick's gotta learn a thing. There's kidnapping involved. Incel friend shows up to cause some trouble making the readers go "Who is this Original character Donut steal??" Bull crap. Same goes for Bantam.

Billy finally gets to confront Incel friend (Who I just now decided is going to be named Rook, or Jackdaw, which are types of crows) in circus park. Maybe a Circus was important to their friendship or some shit? I dunno and this is when we finally get the rest of the OC's backstory which, yes, he is acting like a jealous girlfriend. Billy overslept for picking him up at the train so he was butthurt but going to tolerate it, only to almost be at his house when Billy goes running off. He follows him only to find him talking with his friends about all the stuff they're going to spend all summer doing and gets full dose of unreasonable butthurt and misunderstanding. Because like... How dare my friend have more friends other than myself? /I/ didn't friend cheat on HIM! I literally made ZERO friends! How DARE he not only NOT BE AS LONELY AS I WAS but now he has REPLACED ME TO THE POINT WERE HE'S DITCHING ME ON OUR PROMISED HANG OUT FOR SUMMER?! WELL FUG U TOO BILLY! And the crow from the opening brought him to Chicken Land. Maybe there was a legendary chicken suit for circus park as well and Rook would potentially be the 5th member of the chicken team, but he uses Billy to get it and corrupt it into a crow themed suit instead. He's the dark magical girl!

Billy saves the elder but doesn't get through to Rook. He gets a second emblem of courage for being brave enough to stand up to a friend when they're doing a wrong but it doesn't make Billy feel better because previously it would be his friends who did the brave and got the emblem, but this time it was his friend who was the bad. Billy vaguely insinuates to himself that he hadn't forgotten Rook but this is third person limited so we won't learn the truth until someone says it.

This moves on to sand ruins where Billy purses Rook who is also hunting down the elder to find the last peice of info about the Giant Egg or floating castle or some shit. This does result in some required team work forcing the two ex friends to stop being little bitches for like 5 minutes where Billy asks Rook why he would help the crows gain ultimate power. Rook tells him "I'm not stupid. I have no intention of actually letting the crows have the giant egg's power." And is planning to betray them and take the egg for himself. When Billy asks what he would even do with a wish granting egg we later learn it's as simple and personal as "to wish Billy's friends away" or "Wish that they can't return to Chicken land but Billy and he stay there" or "Wish that I never moved". Prolly all the above in consideration because he feels/ is acting like a betrayed jealous girlfriend.

Also let's refit the "Two chickens facing eachother" puzzle into something about these two working together and making up. Billy get's to reveal he never forgot or replaced his friend but when he slept in late he wanted to catch up to his canon friends before the tour thing started because he had wanted to bring his canon friends to the train station to meet his bffff and bring him on the fun summer tour too. Haha misunderstandings and jumping to conclusions is A+ writing! This friendship reunion doesn't last long because boss monster or main villain kidnaps Rook once the path to the giant egg is open and shit and now Billy has to go save ANOTHER friend.

Shounen power of friendship everyone shows up in the ending-ending. They get sent back to their world and miss the bus, but decide they already had their adventure and will have just as much fun chilling together and getting to know Billy's friend. Now Rook has FWENDS. Da end.

#billy hatcher #billy hatcher and the giant egg

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shyrose57 · 3 years

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Brothers anon, it makes me really happy and comforts me that you enjoy reading what I submit. It makes me really happy to write all of this and finally be able to tell someone my ideas. Thank you so much.

At first he kept trying to deny the father figure role, but when one night Jackie had a nightmare and came to him and ended up calling him dad, he stopped denying it and accepted it. And once he accepted it he did basically adopt all of them. Jackie and Grievous are literally chaos incarnate most days. They regularly love to prank the contestants and just act insane. Ran and Jackie just kind of hang around eachother, like Ran could be reading and Jackie training and they'd enjoy eachothers company. They do sometimes nap next to eachother, or play card games (which is a rare instance where Ran gets (playfully) rilled up and competitive). Grievous and Ran bonding sadly gets interrupted when Ranbob suddenly drops in, but before that Grievous would try to talk to Ran about what book he's reading and just try to make conversation with him.

Oh the height difference definitely remains. And its both terrifying and hailours to new people. It's even better when it's a 2v2 fight because Jackie has a habit of just climbing Ran like a monkey gym and sitting on his shoulders and its terrifying.

Well, since the drinking age is 3, I personally think the age limit is like 14 or something close. I believe I made their ages as Ran is 19 (almost 20. Maybe 4 months away), Jackie is 16, Watson is 30 something, Grievous is 22, and Ranbob is 28 (Ran is younger than his brother by 9 years) I have written down all their ages somewhere (and the ages where the events of Mizu took place) and if I got any wrong I will submit another ask with their ages. The other gladiators have managed to keep good relationships with most of eachother. A few like Grievous and Genevieve are close, Edward, Levi, and Watson are drinking buddies. Lagguis sadly isn't as involved cause he is sick and can't vist often at all. (I think I got everyone. Tell me if I missed anyone please, I cant check cause whenever I exit tumblr, tumblr deletes everything in my ask :') )

I dont have many rules for the Pit rn but I do have, no injuries that could cause long term or chronic damage, no sabotaging opponents, no teaming unless its a team round, no blackmail or anything of the sort to force an opponent to forfeit, and in order for a battle to end due to forfeit both sides must agree to it. But the Pit in general is a lot of things, there's fights for money, fame, and positions (like general). There's tournaments meant for nothing other than to show skill and just to fight your heart out. It's open to anyone above 14 and anyone under 80, to people from Subbin to those just passing through.

And there are different battles in the Pit, theres singles, the ones we saw in the Tales of the SMP episode. Teams, where teams of 2 battles against eachother. Free-for-all, where literally everyone fights against eachother. And Ion battles, battles where there are super powered weapons (like flame 2 iron sword. Or strength 3 potions) that spawn in the area at random. Typically Ran and Watson work best toghere, as their strategists and plan everything with back up plans, and they always call out warnings and watch eachothers back so its incredibly hard to actually hit them. And Jackie and Grievous work best toghere, with the two going insane and often taking people by surprise with their unmeasure and randomized movements and attacks.

At the start Ranbob was completely under Dreams thrall, not being able to really think for himself and even foregoing self care. When Ranbob starts to become himself again the fishermen are more than confused and hesitant, with Cletus especially stating multiple times that it may just be a trick. So it takes a while but Isaac actually is the one to suggest maybe it isn't a trick, and has to do with the mask that was found. This is later confirmed when the mask is brought to the group and Ranbob has a massive negative reaction that sets him back to how he was when they first met him.

Im honestly not sure yet, I think I want it to be a 'lets never go back' type thing but im not positive yet.

I dont have a solid backstory for the fishermen, but I know I want a little bit of it to tie to the story. Do you have any ideas for their backstory or nah? I do know I want them to have met eachother while they where in unfortunate situations and because of those they got family level close.

Ranbob doesn't take the little space well at first; staying outside when able too, even though that really upset Benjamin; and Ranbob has no idea how the outside works and has no idea how to read the weather or what he can and cant eat, but hey the enderman boi is trying his best to make up for everything he's done. And trying to build his own house to not impose on the fishermen (much like Ranboo did with Techno), but Benjamin wouldn't accept that and kept dragging him inside. It wasn't that hard for Benjamin, Isaac, and Charles to get used to Ranbob, already being used to sharing a small house, it was more Cletus with him refusing to leave Ranbob alone even for a second because he doesn't trust Ranbob at all.

The two groups actually get along surprisingly well! They like eachother and Watson once said, "It was like a family reunion. Or like long lost siblings finally found their way home."

I am once again not sure! Originally I planned for them to stay in Subbin and in the Pit. But the more I think about it the more boring that is and more I like the idea of the groups traveling toghere in the world.

I like this question! So enderman travel in groups called hauntings right? I personally headcanon the enderman in this group are basically family, biological or not. And ever since Ran and Ranbob lost their family they lost their haunting, which can be mentally damaging to a enderman. Once Ran found Waston, Jackie, and Grievous and started hanging around them more, he started feeling a connection ot them he hasn't felt on a long time. He's claimed them, as his haunting, his family. And he'll defend them with his life against anyone and anything. And then suddenly Ranbob came in, a enderman that should be part of his haunting but isn't, a enderman that killed his previous haunting. So Ran is incredibly defensive over his group, and is trying his best to keep Ranbob as far from his haunting as possible, to protect them.

Now Ranbob also got a haunting, his being Charles, Isaac, Benjamin, and even Cletus. So Ranbob is also defensive over his family. But unlike Ran, Ranbob still considers his brother as part of his haunting, his family (and yes, Ranbob did think Ran was dead when he first chased him out years ago, so he's shocked and relieved that his baby brother is still alive). And he sees how his family gets along so well with Rans family and then starts to even consider Rans haunting part of Ranbob's. Basically Ranbob has a big heart and is willing to accept almost anyone into his family, no matter what they've done.

Yep, the reason Porkius is so interested in Ran is because he's an enderman hybrid. And no one else is a hybrid expect for the two brothers (and Porkius, with him being a piglin hybrid).

Porkius is excited! He's excited to see what happens and is more than happy to agree to help as long as he is kept in the loop. Though unless he's directly asked to be involved he prefers watching from a distance at whats happening. Just so he doesn't get mauled by a pissed off enderman.

Sorry for any spelling mistakes (its late) and its so long! Im probably going to try to shorten them.

I’m glad you’re happy, it’s a nice thing to feel. Your ideas are really cool, and I hope I’ll get to see more of them in the future.

Now, can I simply say how adorable so much of this is? Jackie going to Watson when he had a nightmare, the Rans being protective of their groups, Jackie climbing Ran? I love that, it’s very heartwarming and cute, and it made me smile.

So Watson wasn’t really sure what to do with his new title at first, hm? And then Jackie called him dad? How’d he feel about that? How’d Jackie feel about the slip? Or did he even notice? He’s parenting them all, he’s gonna have a dad voice and everything. How do the adopted ones feel about him embracing it?

Jackie and Grievous, two people to truly fear when they wish to cause havoc. Tremble before them. Do they prank people, or do they just become absolute madmen on the battlefield? Or something else. Honestly, anything with these two just instantly makes me amused.

Jackie and Ran being chill buddies. very nice. Ran getting competitive over card games is a funny thought. Does he win often? Does Jackie? What kind of card games do they play?

Rather sad Ran and Grievous bonding is interrupted, but it’s nice to hear Grievous trying it. Hopefully they’ll get there someday.

Oh my god, it’s the height difference. Jackie getting on Ran’s shoulder sounds absolutely terrifying. Imagine being some poor new guy pitted against these gremlins and the short ones climbs on the tall ones shoulder-both look absolutely gleeful with the destruction they’re about to wreak, and you already know you cannot outrun them.

Jackie...Jackie...he’s da youngest. He’s small, and young, and you have no idea how much I’m laughing at this. I don’t even know why, it’s just really, really funny to me. Probably something to do with what a complete force of chaos we all know this boy is. Oddly fitting, but hilarious. How does Jackie feel about this?

How do the others? Are they a bit more protective over him? Does Ran like to flaunt his three years more over him?

Grievous and Genevieve are buddies! Very nice, they seem to have a good dynamic. Watson, Edward, and Levi also being close? Very interesting, has a lot of potential. I bet they share a lot of funny stories.

So we’ve established the basics of The Pit. Doesn’t seem too bad, for a fighting arena, to be honest. Seems pretty popular, actually. Do the gladiators live there? In the palace? Or do they just have a house somewhere nearby? What kind of establishments and areas are around? Food places, stores?

So Ran and Watson are the scariest team because of their strategy, and Jackie and Grievous are the scariest team because of their randomness? It checks out. I’m curious though, how do the other combinations work out?

Ranbob sounds like he has a less than fun time here, and the poor guy could really use some closure. What’s he like, free from the influence of the mask? He seems pretty close to Benjamin, so at least he’s got that going for him. Though he and Cletus don’t seem to have the strongest bond at first. How is that resolved?

And how does Ran feel about his brother’s new haunting, after everything? I imagine that he’s at least a little bit unhappy with it, for one reason or another-and there’s quite a few reasons for him to pick from.

How did that house-building attempt go, between Ran never being above water, and probably never building a house before? I can’t imagine too well.

Some ideas for backstory, well, hm. Isaac seemed dressed a bit fancier than the others, perhaps he comes from a richer family than the others? That’s about all I’ve got for now, sorry.

It’s nice to hear they got along, who clicks the easiest?

Possible road trip? Always fun.

So, the enderman hybrids have adopted their respective groups as their hauntings. You’ve mentioned Ranbob’s pretty cool with this, how does Ran feel? Obviously, he’s less than pleased with Ranbob, but what about the fishermen? Protective Ran and Ranbob! How protective exactly? Is it subtle, or overbearing at times? Actually, how do their instincts lead to them interacting with their groups overall?

Porkius must not see Ender hybrids too often, if he’s so interested in them. It’s nice that he’s willing to help out though, and his concern is valid. I wouldn’t want an angry enderman hybrid after me either.

Are hybrids not overly common, then, if there’s only Ran, Ranbob, and Porkius around currently, or are they just not mentioned a lot?

Thanks for the ask, a lot of it made me smile. I enjoyed reading it, and I hope you’ll be willing to send more when you have the time.

#dream smp #Brothers AU #dream smp au #tales from the smp #ranbob #ran #jackie #watson #isaac #charles #benjamin #cletus #grievous #porkius

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spockandawe · 3 years

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give me Steve/Loki thoughts :D

THE BOYS!!!!!!!!

Downsides:

For some reason, they hardly get any canon time together??? I’m sure this is just some unintentional oversight, but it wounds me, personally.

And on a character-driven level, Loki doesn’t react great to people trying to nudge him to be a good boy, which isn’t exactly what Steve does, but he does have a way of... encouraging people around him to be their best selves, and that unfortunately hits Loki right in the well-if-you-want-to-see-me-as-your-enemy-I’ll-be-the-best-goddamn-enemy-ever baggage. Plus Steve has his own baggage with being ““enough””, and the people he cares about ““leaving”” him, and especially at the time when they meet, Loki doesn’t really give off the most... stable vibes.

Upsides:

The good news is that those are just logistical downsides, babey, and what we have here is fertile, fertile ground for slow-burn character development!!!

I guess it does make it a lot harder to casually ship them, which makes it difficult for me on the creator front, because even when times were less stressful and plaguey, I’m not much of a longfic writer. But I am a longfic consumer, and oh my god, this ship! These personalities!!!!!!

So, okay. On the one hand, you have Loki, a brittle, angry, skittish man who is still processing the idea that he is, in a very literal way, a “monster,” and that his father lied to him, and that the deck was always stacked against him and he was never going to be good enough, and probably he was never actually loved to begin with. (the idea of being quote-unquote enough is an important thread for both of them that I’m worried I’ll get excited and forget, but it’s important to remember). He’s lost his home and family, he tried to kill himself, he went on a deep space mindbreak torture vacation, and showed back up to attempt to conquer earth, and just had a really unhappy times of things.

And on the other hand, you have Steve, who was so determined to serve in wwii and be part of something important that he volunteered to be a test dummy for a super-soldier manufacturing experiment. He’s spent a lot of time both accomplishing as much as he possibly could (even though wwii is too much for one person to handle, and it never feels like he does enough) and to live up to the image of the idol he was held up as (even though he’s intimately aware of all the ways he fails to live up to that ideal). And in the end, he lost his best friend, he lost his home, he sacrificed himself and lost everything and got dragged into a future where he can still see a few little traces of the home and friends he left behind, just enough to make the present jarringly alien. And the strongest trace of himself left in the world is the “Captain America” image, and all the conflicted feelings that came with that (the unhappy pressure of living up to a role you aren’t sure you want to keep playing is also another thread connecting these two).

Now, together... On a superficial level, these two have personalities and priorities that are very different, and it’s not difficult to see them both being very frustrated with the decisions the other one has made. It would be so easy for them to pass each other by and go on their own way without even wondering if they’d missed out on something important.

But if you can hold them next to each other for long enough, it’s just magic. A shippy thing that I just had to find the words for in the starjack ask was that you can end up in a shipping situation where it superficially seems like one character is a martyr who just gives and gives and gives, like Steve. And I don’t think Steve is super helpless or unwilling to stand up for himself. But give me a person in his corner, who is willing to be selfish for his sake. Steve might have his limits, but they are generous limits, and give me a Loki who will see people trying to impose and not be as patient as Steve. It doesn’t have to be an actual intervention, it doesn’t even need to change anything, just give me Loki draped across his back grumbling about how it’s stupid that these people are saying they neeeed Captain America when all they want is clearly a photo op.

And the emotional needs that this fulfills for Loki... this is my jam........ It’s not that he needs someone to love him unconditionally, because 1) there’s Thor, and 2) I don’t think Steve’s love is the full unconditional. But give him someone who’s not tied up directly in all of his old pain and baggage and emotions, and give him someone who’s willing to take a step back and try to understand his decisions. I don’t think Loki has made good decisions, and I don’t think Loki thinks he’s made good decisions. But I also don’t expect Loki to try to explain himself (I expect him to play up the villainy-for-the-sake-of-villainy thing tbh), and I do think it’s very likely that Steve will slow down and try his best to think through why Loki made the decisions he did.

This is a general character thing that comes up most often for me in shipping contexts, but I love characters who make terrible decisions for... insufficient reasons. I don’t need the story to justify why they were actually right after all, I don’t need them to put on a self-flagellating repentance act. But I always, always want to read about someone looking at those terrible decisions and subjecting that character to the good ol’ mortifying ordeal of being known.

And like Starscream, like Mu Qing, I think that ordeal is particularly mortifying and painful for Loki. I think it hurts, a lot, and that he would really prefer if people didn’t try to touch the open wound. And I also am trying real hard not to make Steve into a selfless perfect saint, because I don’t like doing that to any character, but especially get uncomfy doing it to him when he’s got the Captain America ideal thing going on. But he is very determinedly empathetic and kind. I expect him to probe at why Loki did his Loki things, but I expect him to do it as gently as someone could reasonably expect.

Plus, very id-tastic, both of them have the sort of damage that I think would set off the other one’s protective instincts :PPPP I’m a woman of simple needs! And those needs are ‘no, I’m protecting you.’ I already went into some of that with Loki being a person who will advocate on Steve’s behalf. But also, once Loki stops being an immediate Threat (which i don’t think takes much, he’s a very, very worn out man, at almost any point in canon), I think Steve is able to avoid slipping into ‘right, let’s all of us just pretend none of that ever happened’ while also not being okay with people, like... taking out frustrations and old grudges on him. When Loki is ready to dive into despairfrustration and start playing the supervillain role that everyone expects from him, Steve is capable of expecting better from him, without also invalidating the emotions he’s feeling.

Oh lord, haha, this has gotten away from me. I need to cut myself off, probably. But no ragrets whatsoever. I like this ship so much, Lise! You did this to me!! XDDDD

#spock replies #ask memes #stoki #steve rogers #loki #long post/#mcu #veliseraptor

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mallowstep · 3 years

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For the love of god, please consider renaming some cats, I've seen names like

"One-Eye, Halftail, Oddfoot, FLIPCLAW (what kind of prefix is 'Flip'?) Twigbranch, Clawface etc. Don't get me started on those atrocious SkyClan names with KITTYPET PREFIXES

Harrybrook, Snookthorn, Rileypool

Like tf?

so i'm going to start with saying! as a general rule, i love these names. i will address them each in turn, but i don't have a problem with warriors having "bad names," i have a problem with names that don't make sense given their context.

it does not make sense for blackfoot to be named blackkit, when he's mostly white. (and, as a colorpoint cat, i assume, would be born entirely white.) etc.

but i have no problem with bellaleaf, because well, yeah! makes sense to me.

after all, leaf was named leafdapple, why shouldn't bella be named bellaleaf.

i'm going to discuss each name you brought up in turn, and then, under the cut, i'm going to ramble about naming philosphies.

one-eye: i'm fine with this. i don't mind cats being named after their disabilities, not when it's an established part of warriors culture. (even if it doesn't happen anymore because people would be pissed about it.) i don't know if i think it's right, or if i think cats would have a problem with it, but i think it's good. i'd like to think most cats wouldn't have a problem with it, though. that said, for one-eye in particular, her name was already white-eye, so it feels redundant. food for thought, i suppose.

halftail: i'm not okay with this, because he lost...half his tail? trust me, as someone who had a cat with half a tail, you don't notice it. doesn't make sense. he can keep sparrowpelt, altho tbh i almost always forget about him.

oddfoot: oops i forget him initially! i actually assumed he was named odd because of numbers or something, but apparently it’s a deadfoot situation. we don’t know his kit name, so i’ll assume he was named as either an apprentice or a warrior to fit. it wouldn’t make sense for him to just have the prefix odd, and i’ll give him the benefit of the doubt and assume that he didn’t. if he did, however, i would have a problem with it because that makes his name a compound name, not because his leader renamed him.

flipclaw: i don't have a problem with it. what kind of name is flipkit? the kind of name a mother would give who looks a lot like the cat who traumatized her, i think. more importantly, i think it's cute! doesn't bother me. would i name an oc flipkit? probably not, but that's just me.

twigbranch: oh no i love her name. i love it! it's so cute. it means something, too! it has meaning. nope. no one is taking twigbranch away from me. i love it.

clawface: mixed. i don't really have a problem with a cat being named clawkit, but it feels...violent. shrug. i don't like it, but like, i also don't like sandynose.

and i won't directly address skyclan because uh i already stated my thoughts on them.

skyclan in particular, tho, it actually makes a lot of sense for their names to be like that. there is no reason to apply any clan norms to skyclan names.

i really hope they keep their names, too. tradition and legacy of names is important to them (pebbleshine and violetshine for the most direct example, but it's everywhere), and i want that to stay. i love that leafstar named her kit harrykit. never change skyclan.

as always, i want to say that i do not have a problem with anyone's methodology of naming cats. i do not care. i support every single name in existence (barring certain combinations of color and "-face," and anything in that vein), and i do not want to come across as telling you what you should do.

that includes you, anon! i do not think you should listen to me when i say i like these names. i think you should rename them whatever you want. (i strongly suggest reconsidering skyclan renames, tho. there's established reasons in canon for them to have those names, and i think it's a cool cultural thing worth exploring. i keep meaning to write a funny lil one-shot about it.)

but you know! if you want to rename them, go for it! i support you!

that said, here is what i think (and i am not an authority on this in any way, shape, or form) about names:

i've written extensively about naming traditions in the clans. if you want to read that, "names. leaders. meaning" and "names part two" are where i recommend you look. (note: first link is to my main, before i migrated warriors content here.)

i'm not going to go over any of that in detail, because well, i'd rather talk about something new?

anyway, i don't think there's a reason to rename the vast majority of cats. i have very, very, few rules. heck, in ashes, i even had squilf come out and say that there's not even a problem with cats sharing a prefix.

the two cats i have renamed are yellowstorm and runningcloud, both for very specific reasons: -fang is a suffix that only makes sense if you're a warrior, and yellowfang names runningpaw runningnose, but in this au, sagewhisker names him, and she doesn't seem like the type to give that kind of name.

in yellowfang's secret, which i do generally treat as canon, yellowfang explains runningnose's name. i don't have a problem with her giving that name to him in the slightest. i just don't think sagewhisker would, and that overrode my general conservative approach to cat names.

but i do think, to an extent, cats are named for the world around them. i explored this in "without warning," where cats can be named after all sorts of strange things (elevator is my favourite), because well, they don't know what strange names are and are not.

so, for example, if there was a kit named, say, chaffinchkit, i would probably rename them, because i've set my warriors in the pnw, and there are no chaffinches in america.

i would just name the kit finchkit, because really, a chaffinch just a specific type of finch anyway.

i also refuse to name a kit maggotkit. there are probably other canonical prefixes in this nature that i refuse, but maggot is the big one that comes to mind.

but i don't care that ferns are green and cats aren't green. maybe it's a name passed down through the generations, one they don't even remember the origin of, but now, it is a thunderclan name.

or maybe, it is given to a riverclan cat simply because their mother thinks ferns are nice and soft.

none of that matters to me, because i personally find limiting name to appearance is incredibly boring, and gives up a really nice chance to worldbuild.

in "fair is the night," ivypool and tigerheart have a brief conversation exploring this.

"ThunderClan is different," he says. "You don't use names in the same way. You don't know the Ivy before you. But ShadowClan isn't like that. Dawnpelt knows Dawncloud and Flametail knows Flamefur, but...I have Tigerstar." "That seems ineffective," Ivypool says. "You can get more mileage out of your names. Here, Ivy is for grey kits, right? But wiry ones. We need strong roots. And Dove is for grey kits, or white ones, but its for the ones who are born soft."

they go on, but i would never pass up an opportunity to explore that type of thing. (and yes i see the typo)

similarly, i like the renaming system. i am like, this close to saying i love it.

the only reason i don't make brightheart lostface in everything i write is because it'd be too much of a headache to remind people, and i also don't want to needlessly invite arguments about it.

she keeps her name in "saccharine tithes of love and glory" because it's the kind of au where i can throw small things like that, without worrying, because it fits, tonally.

i wish it didn't set a fic in a very specific tone, but it does, and so, i usually use brightheart.

(also, it's clear that she prefers brightheart in the books, and i respect that. i don't think, in my culture, that makes sense for her, but i've talked about my works as being on a spectrum between canon and me, and most stuff is far enough away from me that i call her brightheart.)

anyway.

part of it is, renaming cats is imposing my rules over canon. i feel that saying "flipclaw should be named something else" asserts that my world is correct, and canon is wrong.

like, tallstar as a name does not make sense in my windclan. a kit can't be tall, and i've established that windclan names are very literal. but i've let it go, because i chose to make that a rule, and now i live with it.

i hope i didn't come off as prescriptivist, here, because i honestly believe if you want to rename cats, you should. i'd even be happy to discuss alternatives.

for clawface, might i suggest scorchface? (the suffix is malleable, frankly, but i don't feel like thinking much about it.) scorch deliberately has negative connotations in shadowclan, so you keep the same effect as clawface. especially since it just kind of sounds ominous.

but as for what i will do, it is not rename cats. i like their names (especially skyclan's), in all their idiosyncratic glory.

#ask #anon #long #essay #names #warriors names #traditional naming #name discourse #kind of?#mine #txt #warriors #warriors culture #warriors worldbuilding #4th #June #2021 #June 4th 2021

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nikibogwater · 3 years

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Bogwater’s Guide to Writing Platonic Relationships

Have a seat, dears, pour yourself a mug of cocoa, and let’s talk about writing for a bit. Specifically, writing emotionally intense, compelling relationships that are completely devoid of any romantic tension.

“Niki, those don’t exist! The only relationships that are truly intense and compelling are the romantic ones! Everybody knows that!”

*gently bonks you on the head with my magic scepter* NO. This is a common misconception that is perpetuated by media and especially fandom culture. And it stems from this bizarre idea that emotional intimacy must always equate with romantic intimacy. I have no idea where this idea got its start, but if you ask literally anybody who has experienced real, genuine friendship in their life, they will tell you it’s absolute nonsense. Just because you’re not doing the kissy-kiss with someone, that doesn’t mean you’re not emotionally intimate with them.

“But I don’t want any emotional intimacy without the kissy-kiss! It’s boring!”

Yeah, so, there’s a reason platonic relationships in modern media often feel less interesting than romantic ones, and it’s precisely because of what I said above. Media producers and many fic authors are skittish about showing platonic love with the same level of depth and emotional intensity as romantic, so it often ends up being somewhat watered down and simplified, to the point that it becomes a less interesting relationship. The only thing this does is perpetuate the idea that any and all emotional intimacy immediately implies romantic attraction (it does not) while also devaluing the very real importance of genuine friendship/familial bonds.

“Okay, but what if I just like romance better?”

That’s your personal preference, and that’s okay! Everybody has their favorite genres and tropes that resonate with them more than others. My personal favorite is Family, Found or otherwise (with a healthy dose of Hurt/Comfort on the side), but I can totally understand if romance speaks to you more. HOWEVER. This does not excuse writers and other content producers from low-key asserting that romantic relationships are objectively “better” than platonic ones. Hard fact of life: Nobody needs to experience romance, and even those who do experience it do so in different ways. But everybody does need to have emotional connections with other people through the bonds of friendship and family. Believe it or not, romantic love is not a universal experience. Platonic though? Everybody knows that one, and everybody needs it to be happy. To devalue it as a whole is to impose a toxic mindset that forces people to experience relationships in a very narrow and restrictive way.

Okay--*steps off my soap box and kicks it to the side*--now that we’ve established that friendship is important and should be given the same value that society gives to romance, let’s talk about a few ways to write intense and compelling platonic relationships!

Emotional Intimacy:

I’ve talked about this a lot already, but just in case some of you are confused, emotional intimacy is just when two people have a very deep familiarity and understanding of each other. They understand how the other’s mind works, and feel comfortable opening up to each other about their own stuff. Obviously, this is very important for any relationship, platonic or romantic, but writers will often limit such familiarity between characters to the romantic relationships. The first step to writing an interesting friendship is to not do that. Show that your platonic soulmates understand each other and are vulnerable with each other. Here are some easy ways to do that:

Character A knows all of Character B’s personal preferences--likes and dislikes, including small things like food, flowers, music, etc.

A can finish B’s sentences for them.

A is willing to talk about their feelings when B asks if they’re okay.

A and B trust each other and know the other always has their back

A and B will occasionally reference events in their shared history and even have inside jokes

A will seek B out for comfort when they are upset.

A and B almost never miscommunicate--they know what the other means when they say something, and will immediately notice if the other is acting strange.

A and B can communicate with each other silently, via subtle looks, eye movements, or gestures.

Selflessness:

To quote a grossly over-marketed Disney franchise, “Love is putting someone else’s needs before yours.” This is the simplest and also most accurate definition of love I’ve come across, and it is universal to all kinds of relationships. So in order to make your platonic relationship compelling, you need to show that the characters are willing to make sacrifices for each other--even big ones. Make sure this is a mutual exchange between both characters, because otherwise you risk making the relationship look a bit toxic. Here are a few of my favorite examples of selflessness between friends/family:

Character A willingly puts themselves in harm’s way in order to protect Character B.

A is always ready to drop what they’re doing and come to B’s assistance.

A and B regularly do small favors for each other without being asked.

A is always mindful of B’s needs and makes sure they’re taken care of.

A and B always do their best not to hurt each other, either physically or emotionally.

A is openly very worried whenever B is in danger and stops at nothing to help them.

Affection:

This is the part where most writers balk when writing platonic relationships. “They can’t touch each other!!! That’s sexy and weird!!!” No, it’s not. This idea that any and all signs of affection are exclusive to romantic relationships is toxic, and we need to wipe it from existence. Obviously there are different levels of physical intimacy, and some absolutely are exclusive to romantic relationships. Here’s a list of No-Gos if you want to keep a relationship completely platonic:

Kissing on the lips/mouth/neck.

Gazing deeply and silently into each other’s eyes for long periods of time for no other reason than to simply Gaze.

Doing the Do or otherwise touching each other in an explicitly sexual way (I feel like this one should be pretty obvious. Also wth guys, that stuff is grooooosssssssss 🤢)

Honestly those are the only ones that I can think of that are always exclusively romantic. Everything else requires pre-established context in order to be taken as such. So here’s a list of affectionate gestures that are totally safe for established platonic relationships!

Little forehead/cheek kisses.

Hugs--yes, even prolonged ones. Sometimes friends/family just want to hold each other for a while, and not in a sexy way.

Holding hands.

Leaning on each other.

Playing with each other’s hair or gently petting it in order to offer comfort.

Sleeping next to each other when circumstances require it (and neither of them makes any fuss over it)

Saying “I love you.” STOP MAKING THIS AN EXCLUSIVELY ROMANTIC THING, PLEASE, FOR THE SAKE OF ALL THAT IS PURE IN THIS WORLD!

Touching foreheads (my personal favorite of the lot!)

Maintaining prolonged eye-contact during moments of sincerity and communication, especially if Character A is trying to tell B something important.

Sweet little smiles, or other such soft looks of fondness

And many other gestures that I don’t have time to go over in this list.

Tip the First: When writing platonic affection, be sure to bear in mind your characters’ personalities and physical differences. For example, if Character A is significantly bigger and heavier than Character B, they probably wouldn’t be tackle-hugging B, because that would risk seriously injuring B. Different personalities also have different levels of comfort when it comes to physical affection. If you’re writing fanfic, it helps to revisit the source material and observe how the two characters interact with each other. And remember: just because two characters aren’t physically affectionate with each other, it does NOT mean they don’t have a deep and meaningful friendship. Also bear in mind that many people have different dynamics with different friends simply due to the way their personalities fit together. Not all of my friendships look the same, and it’s not because of insincerity on my part--I just have different interactions with different people.

Tip the Second: If you want the gestures of affection to really pack a punch, use them sparingly. Save your long, warm embraces for when the two characters finally reunite after a long separation. Have Character A take B’s hand only when they can sense that B is frightened and in need of reassurance. A “First Platonic Hug” scene can be just as sweet and feelsy as a “First Kiss” scene if you do it right! Also, don’t be afraid to talk at length about how a gesture of affection makes a character feel. Describe the warm fuzzies that bubble up in their chest when their friend/family member gives them a hug, wax poetic about how grateful they are to have said friend/family member in their life. Taking time to explore and dwell on a certain feeling should never be strictly reserved for the ones associated with romance.

And when in doubt:

Observe the professionals. Here are some fantastic platonic relationships from various pieces of media that I take tons of inspiration from:

Frodo and Sam from Lord of the Rings (especially in the books)

Jim and Toby from Dreamworks’ Tales of Arcadia series

Din and Cara from Star Wars: The Mandalorian

Lilo and Nani from Disney’s Lilo and Stitch

So in conclusion:

Listen, I get it. Romance is exciting and cute and sexy and very important in its own right, and society likes to beat us over the head with it these days. But I cannot impress on you enough just how vital platonic relationships are to living a good and fulfilling life. I am who I am today because of the family and friends who have helped me grow. Please don’t disregard it, whether in your writing or in your own life. Cherish friendship. Acknowledge the depth of your platonic feelings for someone. And writers, please don’t be afraid to express those feelings in your work. If we let friendship and family die, I can assure you, any potential for healthy romantic relationships will quickly follow suit.

#niki rambles #writing #fanfiction #long post

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jenovahh · 3 years

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The Honey Pot - Ch. 24 - The Beginning of the End

Collapsing on the bed, you silently wish that your body will cease to function and you will smother yourself into unconsciousness. It wasn’t a healthy way to cope with your current predicament, which was to say, you weren’t really coping at all.

At least, not in a way that’s healthy.

Ardbert’s words echo in your mind, to seek help, but your own voice echoes over his own. That you could not possibly seek any help for your self-imposed depression that working under Varis has brought you.

You’re miserable, truly, having to deal with his pompous attitude and constant flirting every single day. Having to push back the gnawing dread of trying to formulate a plan that will allow you to take him down, for good. You had said it yourself before, that you were a fighter, that such scheming and planning were not your forte. Nearly five months had passed since you had begun working for Varis, making it spring again. The election would be this summer. You were running out of time.

You had no way of gathering any photo evidence of Varis’ crimes. Even the times you had tried to casually act as if you were bored on your phone and snap a picture, you found that it would mysteriously be unable to take photos. Granted it was a company issued phone, making the camera and microphone inaccessible whenever you so much as entered Varis’ presence. A voice in your mind whispered to enlist the help of Cid, that surely he had a device that could go undetected by Varis’ technology. However your own lack of knowledge about such espionage stilled your hand, not knowing what kind of countermeasures Varis could have in place.

You didn’t doubt Cid’s ability, he was after all able to make a device that hid your conversations from your boss, but after learning the burden Cid had weighing him down since his younger days, it made you even more hesitant to beseech him for any more help than he’s already given. It was up to you now; you had been put in this mission by yourself, and you would see it through on your own. Estinien had already gotten killed for getting involved with you, and you could not bear to see anyone else die.

You missed the companionship of your friends, of Ardbert, not even able to give him a passing smile whenever you strolled past each other in the mornings as you took your respective employers to work, and you prayed that Ardbert knew in his heart of hearts that you hadn’t meant to abandon him too.

Varis’ grip on you had only tightened, and you see now that Zenos didn’t mean you wouldn’t last under his rule. Varis was not any crueler than Zenos necessarily; he was more demanding. More restrictive. More possessive.

From dusk to dawn did you belong to Varis, hardly able to move on your own without having to tell Varis about it. Your leash only tightened with more secrets revealed to you, to where it felt like you couldn’t even go relieve yourself without having to ask permission like you were in grade school. Even at home you always felt watched, making you even start to wonder if your room had been bugged, or if some sort of hidden cameras had been placed. Your paranoia led you to start only getting dressed in your bathroom, praying that he wasn’t enough of a creep to hide a camera in there.

In the mornings you would shower, though you would leave it running for a while as you jotted down what notes you could before tucking the notebook underneath a loose tile in the floor. You would hop in the shower then, preparing for another harsh day, dressing quickly as to not seem too suspicious. Standing in your usual pantsuit, you take a deep breath as you gaze at your haggard reflection. Any trace of happiness is absent, replaced only with a mindless drive to see this through to the end.

Grabbing your things, you head out your room to meet up with Varis, accustomed to how much time it takes for you to eat your breakfast so that you don’t have to spend any extra time in the morning with him. You spurned his offers to eat breakfast with him, lying that you enjoyed the extra time to sleep in now that you didn’t have to wake up at the crack of dawn to train with his son.

“What’s the plan for today?” You ask nonchalantly, asking only out of habit than actually caring what he does. Even the campaign trail had grown monotonous, finding yourself stuck in more budget spending meetings than you ever cared to attend in your lifetime.

“A meeting here and there, and depending on how long things take, I will have you attend an important dinner with me.” Varis sighs, already typing away at his phone.

A dinner is not foreign to you, but that your attendance is up in the air is. “Will you be sending me home?”

Varis stops his fiddling to glance at your seriously for a moment. “It depends on how I feel. This guest is particularly important and while I have grown to trust you more Honey...there are still things I must keep within a tight network. I trust you understand.”

Keeping your face neutral, you bow politely, though your mind is running malms a minute. “Of course, my lord.”

Standing straight once again, you find he is smiling appreciatively. “Excellent. The nature of this meeting is important, which is why I require a bodyguard of your caliber to be present. I’ll say that it will most likely give me a certain...edge, with the election.” Smirking, he begins to head out to the car. “In fact, I am willing to say that it will practically secure my victory.”

Not liking the sound of that, you do your best to not frown outwardly, following him outside. “It must be truly magnificent if that is the case.” You comment, opening the door for him as he slides inside.

“I suppose you could say that.” And he says nothing more. Hopping in the car after him, you remain silent as well, watching the city pass by in a blur as you try to think about what he could possibly do that would ensure his victory. Varis had his charismatic persona, but for what you knew about Lord Hien, he would be a tough opponent. Lord Hien was up for reelection, but he was just as charismatic, if not more so than Varis. He was well liked by the people and genuinely had their best interests at heart. He had his shortcomings, but was overall a good leader.

Which meant that if Varis wanted any true shot of winning, he had to fight dirty.

It was just a matter of figuring out how dirty.

You spend so much time in your thoughts the whole day that night comes soon enough, spring’s warm breeze caressing you even though your suit. The warm weather helps your mood somewhat, relaxing you as the car rolls through the city, going to whatever gods forsaken restaurant Varis is taking you to. You made sure to eat a bit of dinner before departing, not wanting to be tempted by the overly rich food.

Arriving, you step out, seeing the restaurant is just as fancy as you had thought, not that Varis would accept anything less. Varis steps out and you scan the area, finding no immediate threats. The chauffeur pulls off and you lead Varis inside, the maître d' greeting Varis extravagantly, showering him with praises of what an honor it was to have him choose to dine at their establishment. Repressing your urge to roll your eyes, you follow the host toward a private room, keeping an eye on tables as you pass by, noting the faces of a few familiar businessmen.

The private room is actually at the back of the restaurant, complete with a small balcony leading outside. Ornate glass doors were swung wide open allowing fresh air to blow in, styled in Ishgardian architecture, now that you had finally realized it was an Ishgardian restaurant. Varis takes his seat at a rectangular table, too small to host a party of people but too big to eat solo. You notice that there’s only one other chair, making you wonder just who it could be that would turn the tide in Varis’s favor.

The question burned on your tongue like tea you drank too quickly, desperate to know, but you willed your patience to hold out a little longer. No doubt that Varis could sense your curiosity, try as you might to hide it, but he was content to let you stew a little longer as you waited for your guest to arrive.

Only five more minutes pass before there is a knock on the door, one of the waiters announcing that said guest had arrived. You give up any sense of trying to seem aloof and face the door, ready to claim you were ready for a potential threat if Varis decided to question you.

“Let them in.” Varis calls, taking a sip of water from the glass upon the table.

The waiter nods, opening the door so that the guest may step inside. A tan hand extends into view, clapping the waiter on the shoulder in a show of over-familiarity, before the body it belongs to comes through the door.

You can’t control your reaction fast enough to fix your face, seeing that oh-so-familiar uniform come into view. The uniform of the Kugane police and the man who wears it gives a boisterous laugh at the waiter’s fumbling. Hair much like Varis’ own is tied in a small bun atop his head, somewhat blonde, but the coloring is so light one would think it white at first glance. A strong jawline gives way to a stellar smile. However, that is not what captures your attention the most.

Upon the man’s uniform lies a shiny, silver badge, listing him as Ilberd Feare, Deputy Chief of Police.

Stranger still, is the tingling on the back of your neck. It had been absent since that day you and Zenos fought and he had shown you that strange power. You still had no clue what it was, but it allowed him to surpass mortal limitations, given how he implied that he was no longer mortal at all.

“Why do you look so afraid? Unable to come to terms with the fact you’ve been fucking a literal monster?”

As Ilberd turns, he makes eye contact with you, giving you an inquisitive look at the shocked expression on your face. Coughing, you try to play it off, noticing his raised eyebrow as Varis stands to greet him. “Ilberd, I’m glad you could make it.” Varis welcomes, extending his hand in an offer to shake it. In perhaps the greatest show of camaraderie you’ve ever seen from Varis, Ilberd shakes his hand and the two hug as men do, Ilberd giving Varis a beaming smile.

“Good to see ya too, Lord Varis. Sorry for takin’ so long. Had a few hang ups at the office, didn’t even give me the chance to change into somethin’ a bit more presentable.” Ilberd chuckles, the two men finally releasing each other. “I see you’ve got a new bodyguard in rotation. Though it’s been a minute since we could meet up.”

“This is my bodyguard, Honey. A more recent find, she’s been with us for over a year now, though she started off as one of Zenos’ finds. In time, she came to her senses and decided to work for me instead.” Varis preens, chest puffing out the slightest bit as he gestures to where you’re standing.

You take little note of it however, the humming growing stronger as you and Ilberd make eye contact. Something in his eyes tells you he feels something too, making you wonder if he’s like you; that he possesses the Echo. Something within you tells you that’s highly unlikely, meaning that something else must be going on.

Remembering yourself, you bow politely. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.” You greet, feeling his eyes still upon you. Tilting his head, his eyes narrow as he takes a few steps toward you. Arching a brow, you stand completely still, refusing to let him unnerve you. “Is something the matter?”

Ilberd remains silent, beady eyes focused on you, brows pinched together in concentration. “You seem familiar somehow. Like I know you.”

Your heart plummets for a second. You had hardly interacted with him during your time on the police force being a rookie and all, but that doesn’t mean he’s not seen your face. Better to play it dumb, hoping it doesn’t come to mind.

“Like maybe I knew you as a kid, or something.” He continues, as if he hopes to jog your memory before his own.

Taking the unintentional lifeline, you shrug casually, revealing nothing. “Lord Varis did pluck me from the streets. Maybe you remember me running away from you once or twice.”

Ilberd appears unconvinced, but can’t seem to place your face well enough to bother refuting your claim. “Maybe so. Though I’m surprised Lord Varis would pluck someone off the streets just to be his bodyguard.” Ilberd hums as he finally turns to take his seat at the table.

“I must give credit where credit is due. Zenos did the hard work of rehabilitating her with proper manners and etiquette.” Varis smirks, joining Ilberd at the table. You don’t bother hiding your eye roll as Varis motions for the waiter at the door to come over. “I have merely reaped the rewards. Her prowess is unmatched and it is only right that she is mine.”

Tempted to gag, you move to head near the door to stand guard.

“Ah, Honey. I must apologize, but I will need you to stand outside. Do not fear for my safety, Ilberd may not match you in skill, but he is still more than capable of dealing with any threats.” Varis instructs, waving you off. “If you are famished, feel free to sit and eat.”

Warning bells go off in your head at that; just how strong was Ilberd? Most high ranking officers were not particularly known for their combat prowess, gaining the luxury of sitting in an office a majority of the day as they barked out orders. That Varis trusted him enough to protect him in your absence…

Something wasn’t right.

There wasn’t much you could do about it now, merely nodding that you had heard him and stepping outside. Hopefully they wouldn’t talk for too long, but you requested a small chair to settle in just in case they did, the hum on your neck persisting the entire night.

“You are free to do as you wish, today.”

Blinking, you tilt your head almost like a puppy, not sure you heard correctly.

“I’m...free today.” You repeat, just to be sure.

Varis rolls his eyes and gives a dramatic sigh to match, placing down the bourbon he held in his hand. Dressed the most casually you’ve seen him, he looks every bit the picture of wealthy relaxation, though his hair is still bound in a low ponytail as usual. Wearing a simple pair of reading glasses, he tilts them down a bit to look at you over the rim.

He had requested your presence in one of the rooms on the upper floors, usually off limits to you. It seemed like a man cave, but someone as wealthy as he would never refer to it as such. A fireplace sat in one corner, while shelves of books lined the wall. It was somewhat a study, if not for the large flatscreen TV mounted on one wall, complete with surround sound. It made you wonder what the other rooms on this floor looked like.

“I am not in the habit of repeating myself.” Varis huffs, drawing your attention back to him where he is seated in a leather lounge chair.

“No, I heard you, it’s just,” you fumble, shuffling your feet a bit, “forgive me if it seems a bit hard to believe, my lord.”

Smirking, he tilts his head slightly, giving you a once over. “I am not a tyrant.” he hums, standing to his feet from the plush chair he sits in. “I would offer that you may spend your day with me, however I have been needing some time to myself due to the election being right around the corner.” Grabbing his glass he takes another sip, face impassive despite the strong liquor running down his throat. “Spend your day as you wish. In fact…” a cruel smirk twists his lips, golden eyes peering over the rim of his glass as he takes another sip. “Perhaps you may even want to go into the city. I hear there is a rally today for Hien.”

“You want me to scope out the competition?” You ask, unsure just what he is trying to imply.

“Certainly not.” He scoffs, moving to turn the TV on, the first channel displaying the stock market. “I have others to do that for me. Your only job is to protect me.” Turning back to you, he gives you a conniving grin. “I had merely offered the opportunity just to see how much more superior my campaign is to that buffoon’s. If you wish to do something else with your time, then you may do so.”

Unsure what to make of this, you merely nod in acknowledgement, turning to head for the door. “Well, it’s appreciated. I could use a small break today.”

“Of course. Never let it be said I did not pay attention to my employee’s needs.” Varis thrums, chest puffed out as usual. “I will see you perhaps later today. Do be careful out there, Honey. If you do go to the rally, make sure to not get too close, or stay too long.”

Waving a lazy goodbye, you slip out the door, immediately heading downstairs to change out of your work clothes and into something more comfortable. Spring is in full swing, and despite how shitty things are right now, the warm weather does wonders for your mood. Pulling one of the few floral print dresses you bought for yourself out of your closet, you quickly change, finding a pair of sandals with a wedge heel to match. Looking at yourself, you feel pretty cute, wishing you were getting dressed to go out shopping with Y’shtola and Lyse after a long week of work, and not having a day off from your potentially psychopathic boss.

Thinking about work would do you no good, so you push it far from your mind, making room instead for you to wish Zenos was able to see you in your cute outfit. You had spent so much time before things had gotten complicated trying to get away from him on your days off, and the one chance you would have to be near him, he wants nothing to do with you. That makes you sadder than the thoughts of your friends does, so you quickly rush out to the garage and page a chauffeur to take you into the city.

Yuyusho of course is happy to help, going as far as complimenting on your cute dress and making a dramatic scene of telling you how pretty you look “now that you’re out of that stuffy suit” he had said. You were embarrassed by his praise, but it also served as a confidence boost, not having received any such attention about your looks since Estinien had passed. Zenos wasn’t the flattering type.

Making casual conversation as you head into the city, there isn’t a cloud in the sky, but it’s not blaring hot either. Green has returned to the decorative trees lining the sidewalks in city limits, and flowers at store fronts are blooming beautifully. The sight warms your heart a little, feeling an overwhelming sense of normalcy as Yuyusho pulls to the side of the road to let you out.

“You sure you don’t need me to stay?” The Lalafellin man asks, adjusting his suit slightly.

“Of course not. I doubt you wanna sit in a car all day. I don’t know how long I’ll take and I wouldn’t want you sitting around waiting on me while I’m deciding if I should get the blue dress or the green one.” You grin cheekily, feeling strangely high spirited. Interaction with others really was something you needed.

“All right, but stay safe out there, Ms. Honey. Just gimme a call no matter the time!” Yuyusho beams, rolling up the window and driving away. You wave goodbye as he heads down the road, slinging your purse over your shoulder. You had Yuyusho drop you off in the Rakuza district, one of the more low end shopping areas in the city. While your paycheck more than allowed you to afford nicer things, there was something comforting about coming here, remembering days of fawning over cute dresses you knew you’d have to save up to afford. Palming your purse, you know that shopping here, you wouldn’t even have to check the price to buy anything you wanted.

You let yourself indulge, walking past the shops and stalls, strictly window shopping until something fascinating catches your eye. While it was tempting to buy all the things your heart desired, you weren’t exactly living a life where you could party and strut all day, every day. That, and the fact is you weren’t thrilled with the idea of having to lug it all around on your day out.

You spend the first hour or so doing a bit of light shopping, occasionally weaving through stores that caught your eye, buying a trinket or too that you could finally afford. Collecting jewelry you knew Lyse would love or pins for Y’shtola had been dying to add to her collection. Throughout it all your friends were at the forefront of your mind, hardly able to spare a thought for yourself. Once satisfied, you stop at a nearby cafe to grab some lunch, ordering a simple panini and a small soda to sip on as a treat to yourself. Eating outside you enjoy the feel of the sun warming your skin, thinking you might just spend some more time walking about the district before calling Yuyusho to pick you up.

Walking down the street, you hear the faint sound of what must be a large crowd. Curiosity piqued, you follow the noise at a leisurely stride due to your heels. As you round the corner you see the street has been blocked off to any cars or other motor vehicles, the sidewalk lined in balloons the color of the Hingan flag. The crowd seems incredibly large, and you notice a few stalls of street food and small carnival games put together. Unable to resist the urge to see what’s going on, you begin strolling down the street, watching parents be tugged around by their children to the next stall. The sight is heartwarming, prompting you to stop by and get a rolanberry crepe to nibble on despite still feeling full.

As you continue down the sidewalk, you notice a few more banners hanging from the sides of buildings, seeing that they campaign for Hien’s reelection line the street. Grumbling at how you played into Varis’ palm anyway, you find yourself too nosy to turn back. Everything looks relatively normal so far, the buildings a bit shorter and built in traditional Hingan style. You spot a security guard here and there, a few dressed like mall cops, obviously there for crowd control. Your eyes do happen to glance over a suited guard or too, their sunglasses so darkly tinted you wouldn’t be able to see if they were looking back at you.

Despite being all over the news (twice), no one seems to pay you any mind, allowing you to make your way down to the stage that lies at the end of the street. Holding the largest amount of balloons by far, you notice the crowd gravitate that way as the host appears to march toward the microphone.

“Good afternoon people of Kugane! I hope you’ve all been enjoying the rally!” They call, the crowd cheerfully responding as the host grabs their attention. “I can’t hear you!”

The crowd roars in your ear as you carefully push your way through the crowd as it becomes more and more packed the closer you get. Shifting toward the edge, you find the small wall of a fountain to stand upon, mindful of your footing and glaring daggers at anybody who would think to try and look up the skirt of your dress.

“The turnout is far more than we anticipated! We’re super grateful for your attendance!” The host goes on, gesturing to the crowd. “While Lord Hien regrettably could not attend today due to unforeseen matters, that does not mean we do not have an excellent lineup of guests here for you today!”

The crowd cheers again, not at all saddened by Lord Hien’s absence. Shifting on your feet a bit, you reach down to get out of your heels, sighing immediately with relief. Though you stand a little shorter now, the stage is still within sight. The first guests are introduced, some local activists you know within the city. They give their speeches on how Lord Hien has benefitted them and all he has done for the city, the crowd respectfully silent as people both young and old take to the podium. You can’t help but feel a little inspired by their speeches, praying that there will be more rallys like this one that show that Lord Hien is the better vote.

As another speaker takes the stage, the tingling feeling returns. Turning around you see no one behind you, and a quick scan over the crowd does nothing to ease the feeling. Frowning, you try to scan with a bit more depth, but all you see are unfamiliar faces. You don’t feel as if you’re being watched, but despite your best efforts, you can’t shake the feeling of something being off.

“And now, ladies and gentlemen, for our guest of honor in light of Lord Hien’s absence! Chief of police, Raubahn Aldynn, with Assistant Chief Merlwyb Bloefhiswyn!”

The bad feeling is forgotten as the host’s words register, head snapping to face the stage once again as sure enough your former employers take to the stage. Both of them are dressed in uniform, Raubahn’s braids framing his face handsomely despite the cap upon his head. Merlwyb stands behind him as they wave to the crowd, the two of them making an imposing duo with their height. Your heart lurches at the sight of them, wishing to see if you could at least get a little closer to them, desperate for them to see you.

So that they knew you were all right.

“Greetings, citizens of Kugane!” Merlwyb booms, her voice loud enough on her own without the loudspeaker. “It is my pleasure to stand here today and speak honestly about Lord Hien in his absence. As you all know, I originally hail from Limsa, arriving in Kugane as a little girl,”

Merlwyb’s voice is comforting, reminding you of hearing the rumors all rookies do of their bosses. Merlwyb had been rumored to be relentless and unforgiving, but in truth her officers were at the forefront of her mind, and all that she enforced was to make sure that as many officers made it back safe to their families. Her voice carries what feels like hope personified, the entire crowd enchanted by her speech as he informs them on why Lord Hien is a good candidate.

The humming grows stronger, to where you can no longer ignore it. You start to feel a little sick, wondering if maybe the panini you had eaten gave you food poisoning, but you knew in your heart that was not the case.

Something was wrong.

How you wish you didn’t have this stupid ability, unable to simply enjoy a rally like the rest of the normal citizens. It felt suffocating, and you did your best to suppress it. No matter how hard you tried, it wouldn’t go away, agitating you beyond belief. What the fuck is wrong with me? you grumble inwardly, once again scanning over the crowd. It has to be some kind of false alarm. No one in the crowd looks suspicious. Security is posted around the perimeter. Nothing looks out of the ordinary.

Except...a glint of something catches your eye.

Across the street, your instinct tells you to look up, practically unable to with how the sun hangs high in the sky. Shielding your eyes with your hand, your eyes follow the five story building up to its top floor, where you spot a body shrouded in shadow. Grunting, you fish through your shopping bags for a pair of sunglasses you had bought for Y’shtola, fumbling to get them out the box. Sliding them on you can see a bit clearer now, able to make the form of the man a little better. Pale strands of platinum blonde hair tied in a bun become clear, paired with tan skin.

Ilberd? But what on earth is he doing here?

Apprehension claws at your gut, knowing something is definitely not right. Was Ilberd here on account of Varis too? Just what was it that they discussed?

Unsure what to do, you can’t look away from Ilberd’s place atop the building, unsure just what it is he’s doing. He seems to just be watching from a strange viewpoint, occasionally talking into what appears to be a walky talky clipped to his uniform. It is strange that he would be here in uniform at a rally for the opposing party. Surely he could casually attend in everyday wear just the same as you?

“But I have talked your ears off long enough! I must pass the microphone to my colleague and friend, Chief Raubahn.” Merlwyb announces, the crowd cheering loud in your ear.

At that same moment, your heart drops.

Your eyes widen as you watch Ilberd pull out a rifle and set it on the ledge of the building, aimed straight for the stage.

No.

Abandoning your belongings, gifts and all, you leap from the fountain, uncaring who you stumble into. “Please move out of my way!” you scream, pushing through the crowd as best you can. Stealing glances at the building you watch as Ilberd pulls a mask over his head, hiding his face from view. Civilians curse at you as you try to push your way through the crowd, heart racing in your chest as you try your damndest to reach the stage.

He’s loading the bullet.

“Raubahn!” You scream, just one voice in a crowd of many.

He’s attaching the scope.

“Raubahn!” You screech, throat straining with the effort. You’re almost there. The stage is just in front of you.

He’s lining up the sight.

“Hey lady,” the security guards grab for you as you reach the barrier between the crowd and the stage, holding you back.

“Raubahn!” You shriek, struggling against the guard holding you back.

“Hey, you can’t pass,” the guard grunts as he struggles to hold you back, others seeing his struggle and coming to help restrain you.

“Please you have to let me through! Chief Aldynn--” You scream, near hysterics. “A sniper,”

“What are you saying--”

You are too late.

It all happens at once.

Your eyes turn, the hum turning into a burning sensation as you turn back toward the building, able to see the mysterious red glow in Ilberd’s eyes even from this distance. You watch as he pulls the trigger with unnatural stillness, ensuring he won’t miss his shot. Time slows for you as you turn back to Raubahn, screaming like a banshee, for him to duck as security tries to drag you away. Merlwyb finally takes notice of you, but it’s late, it’s too late.

The bullet pierces his heart.

He begins to collapse, his words caught in his throat, and just before you can scream anything else explosions go off around the perimeters, making your ears ring. They are strongest at the spot you had just been standing, almost going as far down the street where the stalls had been. Both you and the security guards are shaken by the aftershock, rubble and glass flying everywhere as buildings begin to collapse. You are thrown to the ground, covered in scrapes, tears in your eyes as you look horrified at the stage.

You do not hear the cries of terror as you push yourself off the ground, climbing over the barrier with what strength you had left as smoke begins to cloud the area. The stage has collapsed on itself, screams in your ears as you try to make your way to where you pray Raubahn is.

“R-Raubahn,” you call, not feeling the pain of broken glass in the soles of your feet. “Raubahn,”

“Rookie!” Merlwyb calls out, sounding near tears herself.

Making your way toward her voice, you stand in shock as she kneels beside Raubahn’s still body, his chest no longer moving. Merlwyb clutches his hand with tears in her eyes, uncaring of the pool of blood she kneels in. Time is still for a moment as you stare at Raubahn’s lifeless body.

“What’s your name rookie?”

Crossing over to him, you fall to your knees, your mind still processing the shock of the moment.

“Actually don’t tell me.”

Picking up his hand, already it has started to grow cold.

“You can tell me when this mission is a success.”

You drop his hand from yours numbly, staring at his pained expression with no small amount of despair.

Before you can cry out at how unfair everything is, the hum returns, your eyes scanning the area before landing on Merlwyb.

No. You would not lose her too.

“Chief Bloefhiswyn. We must go.” Standing to your feet you snatch her by the hand, urgently pulling her to her feet in a surprising show of strength.

“Rookie,”

“We have to go or they’ll get you too!” You ground out, tugging her in the direction of collapsed rubble. Nodding, she dries her tears and follows behind you, the two of you making your way through the smoke and debris as sirens begin to echo through the district. If you’re feeling that tingling again, Ilberd surely is scouring the ground trying to finish the job, but you won’t let him. You had to make Merlwyb disappear. Grabbing your phone from your purse, you toss it to the ground making sure you can’t be tracked.

The two of you make a break for it in what feels like the opposite direction, your feet bleeding but you pay it no mind. It’s still too smokey from the fires of broken gas lines and buildings on fire to see your footprints of blood. You run on pure instinct, eventually making it out to a side street and down an alleyway. Merlwyb was too tall to not be sighted easily, so you had to make the best use of her long legs to just put distance between you and the scene.

The hum becomes a light tingle until it dissipates entirely, and only then do you dare to rest. Slowing to a stop you reintroduce your lungs to air at a normal pace, falling to your knees once more as you tune out the sounds of sirens in the distance. Tucked away in a small alley, this should keep you hidden long enough.

"Rookie,"

"Honey." you cut her off, chest still heaving. Gazing forlornly from your place on the ground tears begin anew. "Please."

Nodding, she comes to crouch by you cringing at the sight of your feet. "Your shoes,"

"It was my day off," you rasp, wishing you had some water. "I was out shopping when I came across the rally. I took my heels off because my feet were killing me.” At that moment your adrenaline high leaves you and you crumple to the ground in pain, curling up into a ball.

"Let me get the glass out your feet." Merlwyb winces beginning to delicately pull what shards she can see from your feet. Pulling out some hand sanitizer, she looks at you warily. "It's not much but hopefully it'll kill the germs til we can get you to a doctor.”

Nodding, you only flinch a little at the sting of alcohol on your open wounds. Merlwyb makes quick work at tearing off a clean part of your dress with a pocket knife, wrapping your feet as best she is able.

"Thank you, chief." you cough graciously, finally moving to sit up.

"I should be thanking you." Merlwyb sighs, fingers twitching in agitation. "Twelve knows I’m surprised to see you here. Complete radio silence for over a year. We'd been worried--" Merlwyb stops herself breaking out into a sob, knowing who she was referring to when she said we.

It is strange to see the strong woman break down like this. You knew she had no shortage of lost men and other hardships, but in this moment she was just as scared and afraid as you were.

And that's just ignoring the fact she watched her friend and colleague be murdered before her very eyes.

You knew Varis was vile, but now he was truly bordering on evil. That dinner had been about plans to kill Raubahn. Or was it to kill Hien but due to the lord's absence they had to settle?

Frowning, you scoot to prop yourself against a wall, taking deep breaths as you try to think. If Varis had no qualms about having the Chief of Police assassinated, then it would be easy work to have Merlwyb killed once she took Raubahn’s place.

You had to make her disappear.

"Chief Merlwyb."

The woman glances at you from her place on the ground, having finished her sobbing but looking no less sorrowful.

"We have to hide you."

Immediately the chief you knew came to the forefront, her milky eyes filled with vengeance. "And let whoever is responsible for this walk free?"

"I know exactly who is responsible. " You snap, baring your teeth. "If they will kill Raubahn they will kill you too! We have to hide you!"

Pursing her lips together, you can see that she finds no fault in your initial reasoning. "But Raubahn,"

"Safety first, Chief Merlwyb. As long as you live, we can eventually get the police force to back us. But we have to play our cards right and if the last year has shown me anything it's that I'm crap at it." You huff, eyeing her toolbelt. "Is your phone still working? Your personal one?"

Pulling it out, she quickly enters her passcode, her phone chirping as it lights up. "Yes."

"May I see it?" you ask politely. Handing it to you, she watches as you punch in a few numbers and bring the phone to your face.

“Who are you calling?” She asks, coming to crouch by the wall.

“A friend.” You sigh, perking up as the phone stops ringing.

"Hello?"

"Cid?"

"Honey? What are you--"

"Getting myself in trouble as usual Cid. And I need you to bail me out."

Finding a taxi that will even get a malm within the wreckage would be hard work you think, but Cid makes it happen. Both you and Merlwyb dive into the back, noticing the driver looks terrified beyond belief, and it takes a few calming words to get the driver to calm down.

You instruct the driver to get you to Cid’s place, watching the fire and smoke shrink into the horizon as you leave the city limits and head toward Cid's sprawling home. Merlwyb remained silent the entire trip and you were content to leave her to her thoughts, your own too muddled as you desperately tried to come up with a plan.

"By the Twelve, Honey, what's going on?" Cid calls as the taxi pulls up into the estate. Hopping out you run into his arms, something he's clearly not expecting, but his arms wrap around you all the same as he feels your tears soak his shirt. "Honey,"

"He's a monster, Cid." you sob into his chest. "Varis, he...he killed…" Your weight begins to sag in Cid's arms as a wave of nausea overcomes you.

Your world goes dark as the stress of the day's events finally catch up with you, passing out in Cid’s arms. You're thankfully not unconscious for too long, waking up in a cushiony bed while you're hooked up to an IV.

You had no idea Cid had a whole hospital room on the grounds but a second look shows you its just a guest bedroom with medical equipment hastily shoved into it for your sake. As you try to sit up you find your feet are wrapped up, but you feel no pain, reaching down to undo the wraps starting at your ankles.

"Oh you're awake-- ma'am please don't take off your bandages,"

Caught, you leave your bandages alone as the doctor seems to page for Cid while he gives you a once over now that you're conscious. It's a game of twenty questions until Cid shows up, Merlwyb in tow who looks just as worried.

"Honey!" Cid breathes, clearly relieved as he rushes to your bedside, taking your hands in his. "You dropped like a rock when you got here. How are you feeling?"

"Like shit." You answer truthfully, warmed by his concern. "But otherwise okay for having lived through that mess."

His expression turns grim as he faces Merlwyb, something unspoken passing between them. Merlwyb nears your side as well, towering over your bed. "I have apprised Cid on what had happened downtown. Once I began to explain, he began to quickly put two and two together and tell me a few things of his own." Regret enters her eyes as she finds herself unable to look at you. "I had no idea the...troubles you’ve been facing undercover. Neither of us did."

Averting your eyes, your fists clench in the sheets, your mind playing the image of Raubahn dying before your very eyes over and over again. You should’ve been faster, you should’ve known--

“He...he was worried about you, Honey.” Merlwyb continues, her own voice wavering.

“Didn’t you two see me on TV? I thought that would’ve showed you I was alive.” you mumble solemnly, wishing they could give you a moment or two to wallow in your own self pity.

“We did, but he was...worried for different reasons entirely.” Merlwyb continues, clearing her throat, shifting a bit closer to your bed. “He...he knew you Honey.”

Brows furrowing in confusion, you finally meet her steady gaze. “He knew me? I mean I was his subordinate,”

“No, not in the way you think.” Merlwyb interjects, reaching for your hand to take it in her larger one. “He knew you, Honey from when you were younger. He had realized too late, and before we could even try and call you back to abandon the mission, you were already in too deep. There was no contacting you.”

Even Cid looks concerned now, and you clasp Merlwyb’s hand, unsure what she could possibly mean. “My memories from when I was a kid are fuzzy. Especially when I was really young.” You whisper, nearly crushing her hand. “How did he know me?”

Merlwyb holds herself back for a moment, but eventually comes clean. “When you were but a child, there was a girl who took care of you. She had run away from home with you in tow, and upon landing in the city, he was the first one to help her.”

“He knew Minfilia?” You ask with a tremor to your voice, no longer seeing Merlwyb, long repressed memories doing their best to resurface.

“He did. He knew her, just as he knew you. And he knew that you were special.” Swallowing, Merlwyb clutches you tight, unsure of how you’ll react. “He knew you had the Echo.”

Cid gasps at that, blue eyes landing upon you in shock. You look just as shocked as he, but for different reasons entirely. “You mean he knew I had the Echo...and sent me to Varis?”

“No, no. That’s what I’m saying, Honey. He did not realize until it was too late.” Merlwyb chokes out, voice thick with emotion. “He had so many sleepless nights, worried sick about how he sent you into the wolves’ den. It tore him apart knowing that he had put you right in that bastard’s hands after he had worked so hard to ensure you disappeared and wouldn’t be found again for your own safety after Minfilia disappeared.”

“Thal’s balls…” Cid breathes, running a hand through his hair in disbelief. He seems as if he forgets you’re in the room for a moment as he mumbles to himself. “It all makes sense. No one can move that fast, be that ruthless in a fight. Gods…”

Frowning, you debate on whether telling Cid you had barely known any sooner than he did than in this moment, but decide against it. Staring hard at your hands in your lap, you stew in your thoughts, thinking hard about your next move. It was becoming clearer that you were not going to make any headway on your own. You would need help, as much as you didn’t want to bring anyone else into this. But you could risk no one else dying. Varis wasn’t even satisfied in killing Raubahn; he had to also murder and injure innocent civilians.

A righteous anger fills you, fire in your eyes as vengeance for lives lost becomes your driving force. You would end this violence, at any cost.

Even if it meant your own pride.

Ripping the tape from your arm, you gingerly, albeit hastily remove the IV from your arm, unraveling yourself from your makeshift hospital bed. “Honey? What’re you doing?” Merlwyb asks, quickly moving out of your way as you swing your legs off the bed, ignoring the pain that shoots up your leg as you land on your feet.

“I’m going to end this.” You hiss, flinging open drawers in the dresser on the furthest wall, finding them empty.

“Honey, you’re in no state,” Cid interrupts but the look in your eyes silences him immediately.

“I don’t care if I’m not. But I can’t afford to keep wasting time. I’ve been trying to do this on my own and--” You slam the drawers closed, the loud click scaring even you. “I need your help. I can’t do this alone like I’ve been trying to.”

The two stare at one another before looking back to you, Cid choosing to speak first. “You mean...you’ve been trying to take down Varis on your own?”

Nodding, you head to fling a few more drawers open, searching for any extra clothes. “I’ve been collecting evidence for months; locations, meetings, conversations. But because I’m too slow, because I couldn’t get away--” you stop yourself, knowing you toe the line of having a full on meltdown. When all this was over, you could cry all you wanted.

“Why didn’t you ask sooner?”

Those words are like a bucket of cold water, Cid flashing you one of his winning smiles. Edging closer to you, he slowly wraps his arms around your body, holding you close. “I never had the courage to do it alone either, Honey. I did not unload my burdens on you with the intention of you shouldering them.” Running a hand through your hair, he clutches you tight. “But together...this is a fight we can win. Even I would have never suspected Varis to go as far as this. And I’ve had enough of letting my own fear cloud my eyes to the suffering of others.” Pulling away, he rubs your shoulders, squeezing you tightly. “Just say the word. And all I have is yours.”

Nodding as you can’t trust yourself to not bawl at his support, you glance at Merlwyb over your shoulder who gives you a smile of her own. “You have more than exceeded my expectations, Honey. And I would daresay you outshined Raubahn’s as well. Whatever resources I still have are yours.”

Hope blooms from deep within, that with these two on your side, surely you could do something. You were still short on time with the election practically three months away, but you would make it work. You had to.

“Thank you...both of you.” You sniffle, dabbing at your eyes with the back of your hand. “Cid...do you have some sort of cell phone I can use to stay in contact? Something inconspicuous?”

Snorting, he gives you a clap on the back. “Do I? Who do you think you’re talkin’ to?” he grins.

His smile is infectious, and you can’t help but give him one in return. “Then I’ll get dressed and return to the estate. There’s just one missing piece.”

“Oh?” Merlwyb inquires, tapping a finger to her chin. “Who did you have in mind?”

Taking a deep breath, you wince preemptively. “Zenos.”

“Excuse me?” The two say in unison, just as you had feared.

“You want to enlist the help of his son?” Merlwyb growls, and you deflate a little at the intimidating picture she makes. “He is just as bad as his father, he has,”

Cid raises up a hand politely to silence Merlwyb, who is stunned by the action, not used to being ordered to be quiet. “I understand.” Cid says, and somehow those words with the look in his eyes tells you all you need to know. “I don’t know how you will get his support, Honey. But I suppose even you have your way of warming the prickliest of hearts.”

Thankful for his understanding, you grab his hand and squeeze it in thanks.

"We'll see about that."

You return to the Galvus estate under the cover of nightfall, having heard that Varis was most likely out celebrating his success. While sickened by the thought, it gave you the window you needed to get back into the mansion without being questioned.

The majority of the staff has left, which is good. You knew that this would get loud, and the last thing you needed were more rumors circulating around the estate and making their way toward Varis’ ears.

Heading down the hall, you make your way to the gym, somehow knowing Zenos would be there. From what you heard, he had been sent out less and less as the election neared, and would train in the gym for hours with nothing else to do. You held fake conversations in your head about how this could all go down, trying to mentally steel yourself for the inevitable argument, only to nearly psych yourself out of it.

It’s too late to back out now. Far too late.

Reaching the gym door, you wrench it open, head held high as Zenos turns to you immediately. Sure enough he was in the middle of doing weights, blue eyes narrowing on you as soon as you walked in. Breathing in a confidence you did not feel, you move no further into the room. “We need to talk.”

“Haven’t I already told you there’s nothing you could tell me that would be worth hearing?” He snarls, dropping his dumbbell to the floor, uncaring how it leaves a noticeable dent. “In fact, I told you the next time I saw you, it would be to kill you. I recall you being able to read.”

“And I recall you not acting like a little bitch, being able to talk things out like a functioning adult.” You spit back, remembering to breathe. You weren’t going to get anywhere insulting him. “Look. I didn’t come here to talk shit. I came because I need your help, Zenos.”

He looks suspicious, and if anything, angrier. “If you do not leave in the next three seconds, I won’t hesitate to kill you.”

Good, this was going great. “I’m not leaving. Not until we’ve talked--”

Fast as lightning he advances, moving to grab for your neck but you dodge him, ducking underneath. Knowing the only way you would get him to listen is after you’ve knocked him unconscious, you move to strike at his throat but he backs off, putting space between you. Moving fast for someone his size, he kicks for your head, your arms coming up to block his attacks. You’re still a bit sore from the explosion earlier, but grit your teeth and bear with it.

Even now he fights to kill, showing a ruthlessness you had only seen when he was out on a hit. You’re a bit more prepared this time, emotions in check as you know why you are fighting. He seems to sense this, growing agitated a lot faster than last time. “So you came to fight then.”

“I came prepared to beat some sense into you.” You snap back, using his momentum against him to fling him backwards, your hands still guarding your front in case he tries anything dirty. “I just want to talk, Zenos please. I want to apologize,”

“You can apologize by dying.” You watch horrified as his tattoo beneath his shirt begins to glow, knowing it was a possibility, but praying he wouldn’t do this to you again.

“Zenos, wait,” you urge, unsure if you should try to stop him or run while you still can.

“You came prepared to fight did you not?” He laughs, his sclera slowly turning pitch black, his beautiful blue eyes overtaken by a haunting red. “Then surely you came prepared to die.”

Once again he’s faster than light, even if you know he’s coming, your eyes aren’t fast enough to keep up. His speed is inhuman, and even if you tell yourself to be ready for his onslaught, you cannot keep up with him through normal means.

The back of your neck tingles into a persistent hum, gnashing your teeth together as you barely miss one of Zenos’ grabs for your throat. No! I will not use this borrowed power on him. I will not disappoint him with the knowledge my own strength isn’t real-- you think, wincing as you block another punch, feeling as if he had hit hard enough to break your arm in half.

You’re losing stamina fast, and Zenos shows no signs of stopping. If anything he looks even more determined to kill you this time, hell bent on making sure he fulfills his promise to end your life. “You’re fading fast, Honey.” he taunts, kicking your feet from under you, laughing as he sloppily tries to crush you underfoot as you barely manage to roll out of the way. He’s toying with you now, knowing that the battle is already won.

“I’ve...still got fight in me.” you grunt, wondering if he’s dislocated your shoulder. He stops his pursuit for a moment, allowing you to just look at him. He looks crazed and feral, his glowing eyes the stuff of nightmares, and yet you can’t help but think he has never looked happier in this moment, knowing that the battle high is singing through his veins.

“Enjoying the battle is the same as truly reveling in it.”

Why do those words come to you now, when you stand at death’s door? He’s not wrong; you are fading fast, nothing but pure adrenaline keeping you upright. You’re positive you’ve reopened the wounds in your feet, which isn’t helping you at all.

You couldn’t die here.

“Zenos,” you try again, meeting his resentful gaze head on. “Listen to me. Please.”

Cracking his knuckles, he slips back into a fighting stance. “The only thing I want to hear is your final breath.”

Tears sting at your eyes, hopelessness churning through you like a boat lost at sea. What do you say that will get through to him? He’s so convinced that there’s nothing you could say to him that will matter, that no amount of explaining will change his mind.

Through talking, Zenos rushes you down, poised to kill. Blinking tears from your eyes, you can feel helplessness take root as your body feels on the verge of collapse, crying out as Zenos slams you against the floor giving you a rush of deja vu, hands caging your throat. Clawing at his hands, you scratch with blunt nails, kicking beneath him but he pins you down with his weight.

“Finally…” he breathes, cinching his hand tighter around your throat.

Gazing up at him through cloudy eyes, you see nothing but pain and hurt.

“If anyone can get through to him, it is you.”

The humming begins to burn, your grip on his hands growing stronger.

No. You would not let it end like this. You would revel in those battles with him, you would bring him happiness, you would make him understand that you cared.

“You will find the right path. You always have. That has not changed about you.”

Snarling like a cat, you throw Zenos off of you, watching as he barely manages to catch himself, barely standing on his two feet.

Hopping up, strength flows through your limbs as the tattoo on the back of your neck flares an angry red, flexing your knuckles as you pull yourself to your full height. The shock on Zenos’ face is priceless, his eyes wide with confusion as he sees the fire in your eyes.

“Zenos yae Galvus...”

With the same unnatural speed he had shown you, you stand before him in an instant, watching as his breath stills at your sudden proximity.

“...you fucking idiot.”

Decking him in the face, you watch as he stumbles to pick himself up off the floor, clearly unsure what to do with himself. The look on his face can only be described as stupefied, his mind somehow not catching up with the recent developments. Stalking after him, he quickly gets to his feet, letting instinct take over as he moves to defend himself, throwing himself at you like he had so many times before.

If you couldn’t see him before, you could certainly see him now.

It’s like watching something in slow motion; it’s almost laughable. His speed pales horribly to your own, able to deflect his punch and knock him to the floor. He looks as confused as last time, his lip busted as it wells up with blood, hand roughly dragging over it. Confused and angry, he glares at you as he launches himself at you once more, roaring with anger. “How?!”

You barely move an inch as you catch his fist, grasping it within your own.

“How?!” He yells, trying to pull his fist from your grip. “The Resonant is all powerful! I am--”

“What you are, is an idiot who doesn’t know how to listen!” You yell back, slamming him into the floor with the same force he had done to you. You climb atop him quickly, fisting your hand in his shirt, jerking him up to your face as you pin him down. “I’ve been trying to talk to you for months!”

“I don’t want to hear any of it,” he growls, threatening to push you off him but you slam him back into the floor, jabbing a finger in his face.

“I don’t care if you don’t want to, because I will make you.” You seethe, staring into the eyes of a beast. “Who else would come waltzing their happy ass back to you after you’d threatened to kill them, huh? Who else would stick by you, cry themselves to sleep feeling terrible for going back on their word?” Clasping his jaw with one hand, you hold his gaze to you, unwilling to have him look anywhere else. “No one! No one except me, because I care about you! Because I belong to you!” Overcome with emotion you press your lips to his in a harsh kiss, Zenos stiffening beneath you for a moment before eventually relaxing, his arms coming to crush you to him as he returns your kiss with equal measure and more.

As your tongues dance together, you know you will have to do more than a kiss to show him just how much you missed him, just how much you cared, but anything worth having had to be worked for.

#Final Fantasy XIV #FFXIV #ff14 #zenos #zenos yae galvus #THP

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