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slightlyunconventional · 1 year

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PLEASE more Sick sneezy k//az b//rekker if you can!

absolutely anon! it would be an honour

keep the s&b/soc requests coming guys i love it

i present:

tired (alternatively, "in which k/az b/rekker and his cold-ridden self pine over i/nej and learn why stifling is in fact bad")

A soft knock at the door. “Can I come in?”

Kaz’s eyes flickered open, clouded by exhaustion. He hadn’t slept in days, and as a result of this seemed to be fighting to stay conscious every waking moment. Running a leather-clad hand across his face and sighing, Kaz replied to the inquiring voice.

“Now’s… not a good time.”

He could almost feel Inej's disapproving frown. Another sigh escaped him. “Give me five minutes.”

Saints, the things I do for these people, he thought, shaking his head at no one in particular. Kaz sat up in his seat, straightened the cuff his face had slowly been sliding down as he strained to stay awake, and fixed a few stray pieces of hair that had slipped from his pristinely groomed head. He took a single sip from the glass of water on his desk, grateful for its coolness against his sore throat. A quick, tentative dab at his nose with a tissue, then he was up opening the door to Inej.

“Do you need something?” he asked, regarding her with an eyebrow raised.

She ignored his question, instead replying, “How long has it been since you slept?”

Kaz was slightly taken aback by this. Here he’d thought his lack of proper self-care was rather surreptitious, but then he supposed nothing escaped the observant eyes of the Wraith.

“And, yes, I’m referring to those circles under your eyes. You look awful.” Inej added. She folded her arms. Despite the girl’s slight stature, Inej easily managed the look of an intimidatingly concerned mother.

“Thanks,” Kaz said humourlessly, “Seems I’m doing that a lot lately.”

“You know what I meant.”

Of course I did, I just wanted to see you smile.

“You still haven’t answered my question. How long has it-”

Kaz stopped listening as a distasteful buzz took up residence in his sinuses. It had intensified tenfold before Inej had even finished speaking.

“-gGNKTt!”

The tightly-pinched stifle left his head spinning. He blinked back stars as Inej whirled around to face him.

“...What was that?” she asked, tone almost demanding.

Kaz huffed. “Nothing.”

“Do you expect me to believe that?”

He couldn’t reply - his nose burned with the same fiery insistence as moments ago.

“-heh’GNKkxt!”

Despite being contained perfectly between gloved thumb and forefinger, the sneeze still possessed a rather wet quality. It prompted a thick sniffle from Kaz.

“That was a sneeze?” Inej asked incredulously. Kaz saw her holding back a smile and fought not to roll his eyes.

“Yes, if you must know,” he replied, voice already dulled with congestion.

Inej cocked her head to one side. “You shouldn’t stifle them like that, you know. It causes damage.”

If Kaz had five kruge for every time he’d heard that from someone. This time he did roll his eyes. As if I’m not damaged enough, he thought.

“I can’t help it.” A lie.

“Oh, of course you can’t,” Inej teased. “So you’d still do it if, say, I pinned your hands behind your back? Would your dignity be able to survive that?”

Kaz ignored the warmth that rose in his cheeks.

He simply said, “Don’t push it.”

Yet again, before Inej could even think about responding, Kaz was crushing a third sneeze expertly between his fingers.

“hhaH’GNKXxt!”

Inej’s brows furrowed in concern. “That’s not normal,” she said, eyes narrow with worry, “Bless you, by the way, if that even warrants a blessing.”

He sniffed wetly in response, nose reddening by the minute. Inej seemed to clock this as she spoke again.

“You’re sick, aren’t you?” she asked. Kaz couldn’t help but notice the glow cast on her bronze skin by the autumn sunshine. He shook the thought from his mind, then shook his head at Inej.

“I’m fine.”

“Again, do you expect me to believe that? I don’t think “fine” people look as exhausted as you do.” She appeared to think for a moment, head tilted ever so slightly skyward. “It was that ridiculous negotiation from last night, wasn’t it? It was bucketing down all evening. Saints, Kaz, when did this start?”

“I… don’t know.” Another lie. He had known exactly when it started - one telling sneeze muffled clumsily into the towel he used to dry his hair of rainwater. Inej didn’t need to know that, though. She probably still does, somehow, Kaz acknowledged.

“Are you sure you’re okay? You really aren’t acting yourself.”

He scowled halfheartedly. “How am I supposed to act?”

Inej simply sighed. “I’ll leave you to it. Do you need anything?”

Scathing words caught on Kaz’s tongue, his mind eager to push away any and all help he was offered. He bit it back, shook his head.

With a soft, sympathetic smile, she turned to leave, evidently still teeming with worry.

“I’ll come and check on you later.”

Kaz waited for Inej’s footsteps to fade before succumbing to the reignited inferno in his sinuses. He snapped forward with a pair of wrenching sneezes.

“hH’GKKTSCHh! Hah..hUH’kKTSCCHHh!”

Saints, this is going to get old, he thought in frustration.

A knock, again, softer this time, though. Kaz lifted his head wearily, rubbing absentmindedly the haze of sleep that had misted his vision. He turned the situation over in his mind, waiting for something to click. Then he realised - he’d been asleep, at his desk, where any wretch could have seen him, done anything to him. The thought made a cold feeling settle in his stomach.

“Kaz? Everything okay?”

The cold thawed a little at the familiar voice. Inej.

He rubbed his eyes tiredly again. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

Kaz didn’t really know if he wanted to face anyone at the moment, but his mind was made up for him when the door creaked slowly open, followed by Inej, who held a cup of something steaming in her graceful hands. “Saints, Kaz, you look even worse.”

“Thanks. What time is it?” he asked, rubbing a hand across his face.

“About nine. In the evening,” replied Inej, voice gentle, doting. A bolt of panic cracked through Kaz. He’d been asleep five hours.

Inej set the cup down on Kaz’s desk in front of him. He regarded it warily.

“It’s chamomile with a spoonful of honey. And a mint leaf - that should help to… clear the airways.”

Kaz still looked puzzled.

Inej sighed exasperatedly. “It’s tea.”

“Tea,” he repeated.

“Yes, yes, I know. Dark and mysterious people only drink the blackest coffee! But that won’t do you any good. This will help you-”

“Thank you.” Kaz said quietly.

“-feel better. Oh.” Inej paused, watching the dark-haired man closely for a moment. “You’re welcome.”

Kaz glanced at his hands, no, at his gloves. He wondered if it would be okay to take them off. She won’t mind, he reminded himself, she’s not like anybody else.

He slid his black gloves weakly from his hands, allowing his own pale, slender fingers to curl around the cup of tea. Warmth seemed to spread throughout him, enough to settle the shivers that kept plaguing him, even for just a minute. He lifted the mug, acutely aware of Inej’s eyes locked on him, on his hands. She’d seen him without his gloves before, many times, but Kaz still recognised her gaze fixated on him every single time. A part of him welcomed it. He’d gaze at her often, too.

Inej appeared to note the way he held the cup so tightly.

“Are you cold?” she blurted without thinking. He looked up at her and raised an eyebrow.

“No.” The third bold-faced lie. He could tell this time she really didn’t believe him.

“Then why are you gripping that mug like it’s the only thing keeping you alive?”

He ignored her, instead lifting said mug to his mouth. Steam wafted into his face, taking both him and his nose by surprise. The humid wisps teased out a sneeze that he was far too exhausted to suppress.

“hhH’gGGKTCHHUHh!”

The mug he was still holding jolted upwards, a sharp motion which mirrored his own snap forward. He wasn’t done. The ferocious tickle refused to back down, and he was left with his face slack, lips curled up in almost a snarl, before the burn climaxed and bent him in on himself with a tearing-

“haH’KZZXSCHiew!”

Kaz didn’t even notice the scalding tea pouring down his wrist.

“Saints, Kaz!” Inej rushed forward, taking the mug from his hands and quickly wiped the hot liquid from his skin and shirt. A glance back at his face told Inej that Kaz still was gearing up for another explosion. By now, his nose was pink, close to red around the rims of his nostrils which flared desperately with every hitch of his breath. Two more sneezes volleyed through him, seeming to rock his entire form.

“hAH’GKKSCHHh! huh-HUH-HH’GKKTSCHEW!”

The double left Kaz panting, gasping for breath, eyes brimming with tears. All attempts at stifling had gone straight out of the window. He looked up at Inej, whose face was full of concern. Justified, I suppose, he thought.

“Do you still want to tell me you’re “fine”, Kaz?” Inej asked in disbelief.

“...It’s not as bad as it looks?” he tried.

“Oh, it very much is,” Inej said sternly. Then, her face softened. Kaz was still knuckling his nose with one pale hand. “Don’t fuss at it so much,” she said, “you’ll just keep making yourself sneeze.”

He huffed, not unlike an annoyed infant. Inej handed him a small travel-pack of soft tissues.

“Here, these should help. And you still look cold. You ought to put on an extra layer or two.” Inej didn’t expect the submissive nod she received in response. “I know how much you hate being coddled, so I’ll let you be. But I will be checking on you every hour, okay? Don’t do anything stupid.”

Inej was sure she didn’t imagine the sound of Kaz’s head collapsing into his arms as she left. She couldn’t resist a glance back into the room, and, sure enough, he was already fast asleep. The door clicked quietly behind her as she tiptoed down the stairs.

#YAAAAYYY more k/az fic #who cheered #well enjoy!!#i quite like this one #im a fan of the spellings tbh i like my spellings in this one #well anyway #s/ix of cr/ows #snz #snzblr #snz kink #snz blog #snzario #snzfic #sneeze kink #sneezefic #sneeze fic

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casimirt · 10 months

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Dear Readers,

As requested via Ask, by @theugliestcrown , here is some Ineffable Wives. The Picnic and the Pond.

It was a nice day.

All their days together so far, had been nice. This one in particular was lovely, in fact it was divine. The unlikely couple had decided on a picnic in the park, overlooking the ducks on the pond. It had been Azirafell's idea for the picnic, and Crowlie's idea for the park. Or rather the pond, as she liked watching the plump ducks float by.

The sun was shining and birds were singing, one of which I'm sure was a Nightingale, as the pair wandered along the edge of the pond. Crowlie's heels clicked on the pavement, and she held a dark lace umbrella above their heads. Azirafell's rosy cheeks beamed as she walked arm in arm, her other was nursing a basket laden with food. And copious amounts of wine.

They were dressed in their sunday best. Well, the demoness was, as Azirafell's Sunday best consisted of floor length white robes, a halo, her white wings being out and probably no shoes. Crowlie had always liked the no shoes bit for some reason, it felt, indecent. But for today, she was dressed in a tan tartan skirt, a frilly white shirt and shoes with little gold buckles.

The shirt had been something Crowlie had picked out for her, it complimented her skin tone, she had said. But, she was a demoness, and had lied. The real reason was because she liked the way it framed certain aspects of her ample angel companion.

Now, Azirafell had pulled off a similar trick with parts of Crowlie's wardrobe. A magic trick she'd have you know, as angels are not prone to bouts of trickery, despite how easily they may be able to pull it off. So, the item in question was a pair of dark, shimmery stockings. I don't think I need to explain why the angel chose those. The rest of the tall, dark woman's attire was a sleek black dress, laced heeled boots and a red ribbon around her neck.

They were looking their finest in short, and had also picked out the perfect place to lay their blanket down. It was perfect to Azirafell because the dappled shade of the tree made for optimum reading light; and it was perfect to Crowlie, because Azirafell was there. Well, that and the ducks. The ducks were collected on this side of the pond, and that was also perfect.

They sat together talking of the day, and what it was exactly that the little angel was reading. She sat with her back against the twisted apple tree, and lazily tousled the auburn locks of her partner. Crowlie, after a couple glasses of fine wine, lay eyes closed in the soft lap of Azirafell. Her dark glasses dipped just enough for her to occasionally gaze unfiltered, up at the sweet face above, their fair brow furrowed in concentration.

Every page or so, there would be a soft chuckle, sigh or gasp from the angel above. Not enough to disturb Crowlie, but just enough to reassure her, when her yellow eyes were closed, that Azirafell was still there.

If this was heaven on Earth, then the demoness was ok with it.

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