#also they are both fully gay panicking over the other in their clothes | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

legolasghosty · 4 months

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I love all the celebrity fake dating prompts! So hard to choose just one but how about for willex, the prompt: wearing each others clothes publicly to 'keep up the image'

And reason: To tick off a certain group that has been being jerks lately. (My brain instinctively thought to piss off the homophobes and stick it to the “fans” who refuse to believe that he is gay, but that is optional!)

- @beencryingfor25years

Hehehehe hello @beencryingfor25years, thanks for the prompt!!! The holidays have been a little nuts, so sorry for the delay, but here it is!!!

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Alex asks, bracing the phone between his cheek and his shoulder so his hands are free.

"Duh," Willie answers on the other end of the call. "This is like dating 101. Honestly, it would be more suspicious if we didn't."

"But this looks ridiculous on me," Alex insists, tugging at the fabric that keeps brushing against his abdomen.

Willie laughs and Alex is glad it's not a video call. At least this way Willie can't see how Alex's cheeks are warming at the sound. Why did he decide to do this again?

"You're just not used to it," Willie responds. "Shoot me a picture, I'm sure it looks fine. Or just ask Julie, she'll smack some sense into you."

Alex sighs. "Fine, one second," he says. He removes the phone from his ear and flips over to the camera. It only takes a moment to snap a photo of his reflection, but that's a moment longer than Alex wants to be looking at himself. "There, happy?" he asks after he sends it.

There isn't a response at first. Oh no, Alex thinks. It must be just as bad as he thinks and Willie is trying to figure out how to tell him without being rude, because that's the kind of sweet person they are. But honestly, the tan and blue shirt that looks so nice on them just doesn't suit Alex as well. It's so awkward, even with the high waisted jeans Julie told him to wear with it.

"Alex, you look amazing," Willie says finally. Something in his tone sounds odd though, but not like he's lying. Alex can't put his finger on it. But it's definitely something.

"You sure?" he questions instead of pointing it out. "You can tell me if it looks bad, I won't be offended or anything."

"No seriously, dude, you look great!" Willie exclaims. Alex can almost picture their wide grin and the sparkle in their eyes when they're hyping him up for stuff. "Honestly, you look better in it than I do."

"That's a stretch," Alex responds, chuckling. "But fine. And fair's fair, now you gotta show me yours."

Willie giggles and Alex feels his heart speeding up again. Honestly, he should have asked someone less... incredible than Willie to be his fake boyfriend. Because this has only brought them closer together, and curse Alex and his everlasting curse of falling for guys that are totally out of his league.

But honestly, how could anyone not fall for Willie, at least a bit. He's funny and sweet and has a mischievous streak that terrifies and excites Alex in equal parts. Plus the fact that they're basically the prettiest person Alex has ever met. And the two of them have a lot in common, despite the fact that Alex is a pop-rock drummer and Willie is a gaming streamer. Even though they've been sort of friends for almost a year after a rather awkward run in at a convention, and pretend dating for just over two months, they still haven't run out of things to talk about.

So yeah, Alex has maybe developed a crush on his fake boyfriend. Which is a problem.

His phone buzzes in his hand, pulling him out of his head.

"There ya go, hotdog," Willie says.

Alex opens the message and... okay he is not having feelings about Willie in his favorite pink hoodie. He isn't. But Willie took more than a second on his picture. The selfie shows Willie in their gaming chair, dark hair loose around their shoulders, his legs pulled up and crossed even though the arms of the chair get in the way. And the light pink fabric of the hoodie in question is covering his torso in a way that is entirely too attractive for something that Alex has worn to bed a million times. Alex is 99% sure that if he actually walked in on Willie wearing that in person, he wouldn't be able to resist the urge to kiss them.

"Well?" Willie asks. "How do I look?"

Alex clears his throat, suddenly realizing how long he's been staring at the photo. "Um, it looks great, very, uh, boyfriend-y."

"Well this hoodie does seem to be made of boyfriend material," Willie teases after a second. "Gonna piss off some homophobes for sure."

"Perfect," Alex responds, laughing. "I mean, what's the point in this if we don't?" Which is something he has to remember himself...

"Alex, we gotta get going!" Reggie calls from outside of Alex's bedroom. "Quit flirting with your faux-boo and let's go!"

"One sec," Alex yells back. "Sorry, I've got to go," he says into the phone. "Content Day calls."

"Yeah I gotta prep for stream in a few anyways," Willie sighs. "But good luck!"

"You too, I'll hop on to watch for a bit if I have a break," Alex promises.

"You spoil me, baby," Willie responds. "Talk to you later!"

"Bye, Willie," Alex answers, ignoring the flush in his cheeks at the pet name as he disconnects the call.

Reggie gives him a smirk when he joins the rest of the band in the living room of their apartment, but Alex just shakes his head. Now is not the time to talk about his crush. They pile into Alex's van and head for their favorite cafe.

----------

A few hours later, Alex has almost managed to put the image of Willie in his hoodie out of his mind. But he has a minute to himself while Luke and Reggie are filming a little studio tour, so he pulls up Willie's stream on his phone. And... well. Yeah.

Alex.exe has stopped working.

Willie is playing some new farming sim at the moment and getting hopelessly lost on the map. He's laughing at the conflicting directions he's getting from the chat and Alex wants to be there beside him, enjoying that rush of joy in person.

Willie must recognize his username on the chat log, because he breaks off midsentence. "Hey, Lexi, you're here! Everyone, my boyfriend has decided to grace us with his presence for a few minutes, be nice."

The chat immediately goes wild and Alex can't help but laugh at some of the comments. He types out a quick hello message, then adds that he probably can't stay long.

"No worries, babe, I know you have your big fancy music job to do," Willie responds. "But I'm glad you're here. Anyways, does anyone know where I can find the blacksmith?!"

"You should talk to him."

Alex nearly falls off his chair onto the floor at the voice just behind him. He turns to see Julie looking down at him with a bit of a smirk, two bottles of water in her hands.

"What?" he says, trying to remember if he's forgetting some content thing.

"Willie," she clarifies. "It's pretty obvious you like him for real, and it sure looks to me like he likes you too."

"What, no, they're like..." Alex stammers. "I mean, Willie is way out of my league. He doesn't like me like that. It would just make things weird."

"Please, you're like a solid 10," Julie responds, smacking him on the shoulder with one of the bottles. "And they have a massive crush on you, it's so obvious."

"Their a good actor," Alex points out with a shrug. "It's a fake relationship, we're supposed to look like we're in love."

"Okay but you also stay up way too late texting," Julie counters. "And he knows your allergies even better than Luke, who has known you since before you knew about all of said allergies. You two have memorized each others' coffee orders, sensory icks, and medication schedules. I'm pretty sure he likes you back."

Alex sighs. When she puts it like that, it seems so simple. But...

"Don't give me that look," Julie adds. "Just talk to them."

"Fine," Alex groans. "I'll try."

"Andddd, here, in his natural habitat, we have the elusive drummer boy," Luke cuts in, bursting through the green room door with Reggie on his heels with the camera.

Alex heaves a more dramatic sigh. "Sue me for wanting a break from you weirdos," he teases, taking the water Julie offers him. "Are you almost done?"

"Just about!" Reggie answers.

"Then I'm going to go check my sticks," Alex tells them, disconnecting from the stream on his phone and heading for the studio.

He has to admit he's a bit distracted for the rest of the day though. Does Willie actually like him back? Is that even possible?

Only one way to find out, he decides during dinner.

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moiraineswife · 3 years

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Jasnah and Wit - Presentation Meta

Part 1 of the great saga of Witsnah “WELL ACTUALLY” metas I plan on doing bc y’all have just pushed me That Far.

Well hello there. I’m GRUMPY. And what I do when I’m grumpy is I channel it into a little thing called spite meta. That’s what this is. It’s me angrily yelling for several thousand words about why this thing is a GOOD thing, actually.

Today’s subject, the much controversial post Rhythm of War canon pairing that is: Wit/Jasnah.

So let’s (angrily) explore why this is actually a positive thing for both characters, on a nuanced, meta, character analysis level. Because that’s the only level that I have.

I admit, I was sceptical and uncertain. But when I actually sat and thought about this for a hot second...It started making a lot of sense to me. And then I thought about it for, like, a hot minute, and it made a LOT of sense to me. And now I’ve thought about it for a hot month, so come. Step into my thoughts, and I will explain my perspective on this all…

Firstly we’re going to talk about clothes. Yes, clothes. Clothes and what they symbolise for this pair, together and individually.

He was immaculate, as always, with his perfectly styled hair and sharp black suit. For all his talk of frivolity, he knew exactly how to present himself. It was something they’d bonded over. - RoW, 64

Wit and Jasnah have bonded over the idea of presentation and the effects it can create. Both of them have used this idea to great effect multiple times in the series. Wit displays himself as a more appropriate form of an Alethi highprince at war - a crisp, tailored, military suit in a colour that makes him instantly and easily identifiable in a crowd. It’s part of his subtle mockery of those around him - that the King’s Wit is a better presented highprince than the REAL highprinces. It also makes him recognisable, and it makes him seem professional and able to move easily in high society.

Equally, we’ve seen him take the guise of a poor beggar so as to sneak into Kholinar and go unnoticed and dismissed when he sneaks into the palace to recover Design in Oathbringer.

Jasnah, meanwhile, gives a memorable and impactful speech to Shallan at the beginning of Words of Radiance about the illusion of perception. About how by presenting herself as a princess, looking the way others expect, she is able to effectively use her authority. And would be able to similarly do so if she simply convinced people she was a princess, by manipulating their perception of her.

Both Jasnah and Wit understand this idea - of presenting yourself, not necessarily in the way you want to look, but in the way you want others to look at you. Creating for them the thing you want them to see, which enables you to better be that thing.

It also runs deeper than that. They’re not just people who like to dress well. They understand that this has a power to it. They understand the effect it will have over others. And it’s this deeper thing that I believe they’ve bonded over.

Because they don’t simply appear put together in their clothes; they appear put together in their everything. Wit and Jasnah are people who are consistently calm and composed regardless of the situation. They do it in very different ways. Jasnah with calculating stoicism and intellectual calm. Wit with indifferent frivolity and nonchalant acceptance of what’s happening around him.

The core effect is the same. When the walls are crumbling down, the armies are sweeping in, and everything’s on fucking fire, Wit and Jasnah are two people you expect to be able to look to for direction and a bit of sanity amidst the chaos.

They’ve both cultivated personalities and personas that revolve around appearing and seeming in control and unperturbed whatever is happening. It’s like their whole Thing.

So the presentation is not only about clothes and make up, it’s about who they are deep down as people. The fact that they’re always the strong ones. Always the ones in control. Always the ones who aren’t panicking despite the fact that everything’s on fucking fire.

They’re people that others EXPECT to behave a certain way. There’s a predictability to them. A dependability. In Wit’s case, it’s that you can rely on him to be esoteric, confusing, and unpredictable, but still.

There’s a pressure in that. There’s a pressure in always being THAT put together. In always being THAT on top of things. In always being THAT person who can never break down screaming when things go wrong because that’s not who they are and not what people expect. They have to be more than that. They have to be BETTER than that.

They’re also people that other characters tend to other/deify. Shallan remarks several times about Jasnah being inhuman/beyond ordinary people, and even goes so far as to compare her to the divine, despite her being a heretic.

Wit, meanwhile, gets asked if he’s a Herald, has that odd air of always knowing things that he shouldn’t, and being in places he shouldn’t at the right times.

They’re both ‘positively’ outcast. And I don’t mean that in an overly posh English way and being positively outcast, darling. What I mean is that, instead of being shunted outside of the circle of normality, they’re both placed on pedestals above it. Which is a different sort of outcast, but comes with its own package of problems.

And this brings us to: vulnerability. Because they’ve bonded over this presentation thing, but they’ve ALSO bonded over the fact that they’ve found someone they don’t have to do that around all the time. Someone they can let their guard down with and just be themselves. Someone they don’t have to present and perform for. Someone they can just be HUMAN with.

So we’re going to look more closely at the clothing aspect of this. Because there’s symbolism here, and it deeply interests me. With a focus on Jasnah, because Wit’s a mystery by design, and Jasnah’s got some more intentional stuff going on here I feel, re narrative symbolism.

So from the moment we’re introduced to her, Jasnah always looks immaculate. She always looks perfectly put together. Shallan remarks multiple times on her havah, on her make up, on the intricate and perfectly done braids of her hair. Which is a little bit gay on Shallan’s part (which is valid) but it’s also significant, symbolically.

I talked already about Jasnah’s idea of ‘power is an illusion of perception’, but I feel it’s worth coming back to. Both because of how much it shapes Shallan, but also how much it shapes Jasnah, and informs what we know about her.

Jasnah is ALWAYS put together. She is ALWAYS perfectly made up, the absolute ideal of the perfect Alethi princess. Even in scenes of distress or ‘downtime’ scenes - such as waiting for Shallan in the hospital, or visiting her after her betrayal, or the relatively more relaxed setting being on board the Wind’s Pleasure. The text makes a point to note that Jasnah is perfectly done up and presenting exactly as she wishes.

The times we see slips in that are DEEPLY interesting to me.

The first one I want to look at, briefly, is That Controversial Scene in the way of kings, where Jasnah uses Soulcasting to kill the men who attacked her and Shallan in the alley.

Just prior to this we see her bathing, where Shallan still remarks on how composed Jasnah is. This is also part of her presentation. She’s entirely naked, but that illusion is still up. She’s still more in control than other people are fully clothed.

What I find interesting is the specific note that Jasnah does not take the time to have her hair braided before she sets out with Shallan. It’s mentioned as being unbound a few times.

Symbolically, I like this, because I feel like it speaks to a slight loosening of her usual control. There’s something about that scenario that sets Jasnah on edge. There’s something about it that makes her feel.

Besides, men like those…” There was something in her voice, an edge Shallan had never heard before.

What was done to you? Shallan wondered with horror. And who did it?

Shallan is unnerved because Jasnah seems calm. But I get the sense, from this line, and from the intense repetition of how unnaturally composed Jasnah appears, that her composure is a front. And that if we had her perspective on this scene, it would look very different from how Shallan imagines it.

There’s something driving her here. Something beyond the logic she explains to Shallan, about making the city safer, about the guards not doing anything, about how innocent women will not be able to protect themselves from this, and how she wanted those men gone. All of which I believe is true, but that line from Shallan, and the way in which Jasnah goes about this...It feels personal. There’s something else going on behind the scenes that we don’t know or understand.

Regardless. This is the first time we see Jasnah step out of the cultured, reserved, stoic scholar. She’s something other than an ideal Alethi princess and studious mentor in this scene. And the detail of her hair being unbound, contained, wild, for the first time since we’ve met her feels..Significant. It’s an important detail to linger on, I think.

Which brings us to the next exception to Jasnah’s exceptional presentation rule: her murder!

Even in the scene before where we see Jasnah, arguably, the most vulnerable that we’ve seen her, in the cabin when Shallan confronts her about her fear of the upcoming apocalypse. It’s only a moment. Only a moment of genuine emotion that Shallan manages to glimpse before the mask comes back.

This was not the Jasnah that Shallan was accustomed to seeing. The confidence had been overwhelmed by exhaustion, the poise replaced by worry. Jasnah started to write something, but stopped after just a few words. She set down the pen, closing her eyes and massaging her temples. A few dizzy-looking spren, like jets of dust rising into the air, appeared around Jasnah’s head. Exhaustionspren.

Shallan pulled back, suddenly feeling as if she’d intruded upon an intimate moment. Jasnah with her defenses down. Shallan began to creep away, but a voice from the floor suddenly said, “Truth!”

Startled, Jasnah looked up, eyes finding Shallan—who, of course, blushed furiously.

Jasnah turned her eyes down toward Pattern on the floor, then reset her mask, sitting up with proper posture. “Yes, child?”

The text notes in this segment that Jasnah’s poise and presentation is a mask, but it also describes it as her ‘defenses’. This is her armour. It stops people looking too close. It stops them reading her emotion, her weaknesses. This is also one of very few times we see Jasnah attracting spren in the series.

However, even in this scene, clearly exhausted, overworked, and overwhelmed, Jasnah remains perfectly put together. All of her armour, her immaculate havah, her make-up, her braids, are all in place. Even in this moment.

Which makes a stark contrast to the next scene we find her in where she’s dressed only in a “thin nightgown”, and is lying on the floor with a sword in her chest. The vulnerability of unexpected assassination.

When next we see Jasnah, in the epilogue, is when she’s freshly spat out of Shadesmar after an apparently harrowing ordeal.

Her clothing was ragged, her hair formed into a single utilitarian braid, her face lashed with burns. She’d once worn a fine dress, but that was tattered. She’d hemmed it at the knees and had sewn herself a glove out of something improvised. Curiously, she wore a kind of leather bandolier and a backpack. He doubted she’d had either one when her journey had begun.

Even in another plane, apparently being hounded and in fear of her life, she’s managed to acquire some appropriate clothing, a glove, and a damn bandolier. Because of course she has. Perception. Iconic.

After that we don’t see her out of anything beyond her famous havah-braids-make up combo. Even when she’s with her family, and Navani remarks in her setting down the mask of the queen, she remains masked. There are still defences up. She never fully lets her family in on her plans, or her thoughts and fears.

No, the next time we see her symbolically, and emotionally, vulnerable: is with Wit. Perhaps for the first time, fully, without ANY of her usual masks and pretences, and under her own steam and of her own volition.

Locked away in a central room on the second level—sharing no walls with the outside, alone save for Wit’s company—she could finally let herself relax.

She DELIBERATELY picks a house with a second floor, and an interior room with no outside walls, with multiple fabrial traps to warn of assassins or intruders. But she manages to relax in Wit’s company. There’s a trust there. An understanding. A much needed vulnerability.

Clothing wise, in this scene Jasnah is dressed only in a nightgown and a dressing gown, and is carefully noted to have her safehand uncovered. Jasnah isn’t Vorin, strictly speaking, but she’s still been raised her entire life in a society that views safehands as something inherently sexual/to be hidden. So much so that she takes the time and care to sew herself a safehand glove while in Shadesmar. So all of this is a fairly Big Deal. It’s a Big Deal for anyone. For Jasnah? More miraculous than Kaladin giggling.

Jasnah Kholin is not vulnerable. Jasnah Kholin is never unguarded. Jasnah Kholin never willingly lets her guard down. Jasnah Kholin is absolutely as paranoid as Elhokar, if not more so.

She’s made herself a BUNKER at this point. She’s in an interior room, surrounded by traps, there’s spheres sewn into her dressing gown, and she has a wholeass BOAT waiting for her in Shadesmar JUST IN CASE someone manages to get through: guards, an entire BUILDING, multiple rigged traps, then her, with her plate, her blade, her Soulcasting ability, and all of her wit and skill, to somehow manage to wound her badly enough that she has to retreat to Shadesmar.

This woman does not do trust. She does not do vulnerability. To the point that it is absolutely 1000000% a fault. This IS Jasnah’s greatest flaw. Her isolation. Her mistrust. Her paranoia.

Anyone that comes into her life she’s suspicious of. She blithely warns Shallan about Kabsal stating he’s only using her to get close to Jasnah to steal from her/kill her.

We dismiss this, and look at it as brilliance/Jasnah knowing all, because she’s right. But it’s flawed brilliance. Because it’s the ‘broken clock’ fallacy, you know? If you suspect EVERYONE around you of being an assassin...Well, some of them will be.

Jasnah’s paranoia is another meta, however. But the point here is that: Jasnah doesn’t do anything by halves. She has an ideal for how she wants to live her life and she COMMITS to it. And part of that is her presentation, and the perception she projects, to an unhealthy degree, even around trusted family.

So the fact she has found someone she can relax all of her INCREDIBLY strict and overzealous masking and enforced personal presentation? Is both very significant in terms of her relationship with Wit, but also herSELF?

Because Jasnah NEEDS this. She needs it like Kaladin needs therapy yesterday.

Jasnah is a “strong independent woman” but if you double down on that idea, and follow it up with “Jasnah is a strong independent woman who doesn’t need a man/anyone” then you are absolutely 1000% missing the whole entire point of her character.

All the Stormlight characters are deconstructions of classical fantasy tropes, to varying extents.

Jasnah is the ‘strong independent woman’ trope except asking what if you ACTUALLY apply that to an actual human person? What would that do to them? How would that hurt them? And what it does is everything Jasnah is.

Which has been done so MASTERFULLY because we look at all of these flaws, and these objectively negative things that she does to cope with having this label slapped onto her, and we golf clap quietly in a corner and go ‘wow that’s so badass, that’s so cool, let’s totally romantacise all of these actually deeply worrying coping mechanisms and not look at them at all until Brandon smashes us in the face with them like a baseball bat with the nails of Jasnah’s trauma pounded into it’.

Okay maybe that was SLIGHTLY dramatic. But my point is: Jasnah’s apparent omniscience can also be looked at as extreme paranoia and mistrust.

Her independence and ability to ‘get shit done’ on her own, to the point she doesn’t tell another living soul about the LITERAL APOCALYPSE for more than HALF A DECADE is actually self-inflicted dangerous isolation.

Her constantly being poised, and on her game, and never displaying any emotion is actually extreme repression, to the point her own MOTHER describes her as ‘having the empathy of a corpse’.

Her consistent othering by all of the other characters, from her ward to her mother, deifying her, and othering her, and considering her immortal is actually putting her on a pedestal and cramming an INCREDIBLE amount of pressure to reach an impossible, unattainable, and inhuman level of perfection that becomes so normalised and commonplace that her return from the dead is just like ‘well yeah that’s just Jasnah’.

And all of these things are INCREDIBLY unhealthy!!! They’re not something any real person should have to do just to exist. Especially not in the middle of an apocalypse. When her father was killed in front of her. And then her brother was murdered. And the apocalypse she tried to warn everyone about is happening. And she’s the most experienced Radiant. And she’s also suddenly a queen of her kingdom. Which has been taken over by the enemy btw. And they’re in the middle of a war. And people are dying. And she’s responsible for those people dying. But also some of her highprinces are treacherous bastards. And oh look here’s a couple of slightly mad Heralds she’s taken charge of and- OH MY GOD PLEASE LET HER NAP!?

Again. Slight hyperbole on my end but I feel like I’m #Justified. The point is, her suddenly, after FOUR books, having a single person that she can confide in, and be vulnerable with, and admit she’s afraid, and uncertain, and doesn’t know what she’s doing, and isn’t sure she can actually do this, is not ~anti-feminist~ and it’s not “out of character” and it’s not damaging her ideal it’s actually deeply positive, and healthy, and a symptom of Character Growth.

Jasnah’s is choosing Wit. With her eyes wide open. And she has some reservations about things, because she’s JASNAH, of course she does. But she listens to him. She confides in him. She lets him see HER. She lets him help HER. She admits that she needs that help. She actually says to him, out loud, with full human words, to his face, right in front of him, that she’s frightened. SHE ADMITS THIS!!! Jasnah’s having all this stealth background character development that y’all are sleeping on but I am personally deeply hype about.

And it’s because Wit UNDERSTANDS her. And she understands him. And this is really the crux and core of this whole relationship for me, you know? This whole idea around them always being The Strong One. and finally FINALLY (for him, too) having someone that they don’t have to be strong for. Or regal. Or composed. Or poised. Or in control. Or even knowing what the fuck they’re doing.

She can just...Be. She can ask questions. And show uncertainty. And admit to fear. And to doubt, of herself, of the other Radiants, of humanity in general. And have someone to look to, when everyone is ALWAYS looking at her.

It’s the beginning of an actual support system. Because she needs this SO badly. Because she has her family but she also...Doesn’t have her family? She looks after them. She protects them. From assassins, and then from what was happening in the world/her role in it. Because there’s that line in Oathbringer that she has, about people loving her but still hurting her.

Navani mentions that after she hit adolescence (and after her parents locked her in a dark room and let her scream herself hoarse because they called her mad, lol) she withdrew. And she no longer asked questions. And she no longer wanted a mother, or a support figure, or someone to take care of her. She rejected all notions of that. Because there was something broken there. That trust was gone. And Jasnah will set aside the crown, and the mask of the queen around her family, but she is only fully vulnerable, and fully HERSELF with Wit.

And I cannot understate (i feel like I’m doing a Good Job of not understating this here people) how absolutely fucking ESSENTIAL that is.

Jasnah is NOT a machine. She is not a divine being beyond trauma and pain. She is a human being who has suffered, and who has responses to this.

Jasnah accepting Wit’s support and companionship is as big a step in processing and healing from her trauma as Kaladin accepting he can’t protect everyone and does not deserve to always carry that guilt.

I don’t care if you don’t like the ship. I don’t care if you think it was rushed (there was...a year long time skip. Things did not remain in stasis. Things changed. This is an interesting narrative device bringing us into them and letting us extrapolate backwards). I don’t care if you hate the bones of Hoid and never want to see him on screen: I DON’T CARE.

If you have any respect and regard for Jasnah as a character I need you to acknowledge that this relationship is a positive and healthy thing for her. I need you to see that it’s a step forwards. I need you to see that, from a purely narrative standpoint: this is a thing that should be celebrated for her.

In terms of Wit, too, this is a good thing. I am not about one-sided relationships where only one person is getting something out of it. Even when that one person is the light of my life Jasnah Kholin who deserves all the things ever.

For all his talk of frivolity, he knew exactly how to present himself. It was something they’d bonded over.

Coming back to this RoW quote let me make things as abundantly clear as possible re why I’ve bonded over this ship: They’re kindred spirits. They understand each other. In a way that no-one else has understood them for Jasnah possibly ever, for Wit in a very very very very very very very very very long time.

They’re both brilliant. They’re both intellectually at the pinnacle of humanity. They both know that. They’re also both damaged. They both cover up that damage with a carefully crafted presentation. Jasnah’s is regal composure and Wit’s flamboyant nonchalance, but it’s a mask in both cases.

They understand each other. And they understand the need to have what they’ve found in one another: someone they don’t have to be that way around. Someone they can just be with. Someone who understands why they have to be that way with everyone else; but can give them the freedom to be themselves.

Such parallel. Much power. Very choice.

I was gonna talk about Other Stuff in this meta but lol. 4k words of clothes screaming later and I feel like maybe this should be part 1 of an ongoing saga. Ahem.

The take away from this is: I totally understand why Brandon put these two characters together. For the amount of characters he has, he actually has relatively few romantic relationships. None of them are done on a whim, and they’re always healthy, mutual, and positive for both characters. They make sense, in short.

And these two as a pairing makes sense. On more than a “”””business transaction””””” level of them wanting and getting information out of one another. It makes sense even if there was no Desolation, and no threat to the world, and they were two randomers who met in a tavern and connected.

There’s a personal connection there. There’s an intimacy, and an understanding, and a sense of looking into another person’s eyes and saying ‘yes. You know. You feel it too’. They go through life in much the same way - standing out, never quite fitting, never finding anyone on their level that can relate to them or compete with them or challenge them.

They have someone who can fulfil them. Someone who can actually meet and exceed their abilities for once. But equally someone who can ground them, and meet them at their lowest point, and allow and even encourage that vulnerability.

TL;DR: this relationship is positive for both characters, and healthy, and important for both and this is a hill I WILL fucking die upon. Just watch me.

More metas to follow. Bc I have more to say. Not as long as this one, in all likelihood, bc I feel like this is the Lynchpin argument for this pair. But still. More to say.

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mycrofts-gunbrella · 3 years

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Caring is the Greatest Advantage- Part 3 (Mycroft Holmes x Reader)

AN- Thank you for the patience for this one! My little boy has been unwell so it has taken a little longer than I had hoped but here is the third instalment! It’s a little shorter than the others but that’s because I wanted to contain the angsty part in one chapter, the next ones will hopefully be longer..

This one is a little more angsty, a lot more emotional, but I’m quite happy with the outcome and I hope you are too! As usual, please let me know any thoughts/feedback! And enjoy!

Word Count: 2510

"Is it just me that finds Stephen Fry a bit.. sexy?" You spoke, watching the television as Young Ones' Scumbag College competed on University Challenge. "I don't know what it is about him. He's just.. got such a lovely voice, and he's so sodding clever and his CLOTHES- got much better looking with age, mind." Mycroft only hummed, neither agreeing nor disagreeing.

"Hmm.. He's not really my type." You laughed and petted his head fondly.

"You don't have to be gay to find another man attractive Myc." You mused. "Me and Greg talk about it all the time, though he fancies Hugh Laurie more, especially in Blackadder." You laughed, thinking back on the memory of Greg's fondness of George in the Blackadder Goes Forth series.

"I'm aware that sexuality and attraction are not the same, Y/N. I am comfortable enough in my own heterosexuality to appreciate another man's features. In fact, I very much agree with Gregory's view on Mr Laurie. Stephen, however, is not my type. The few people that did speak to me in University used to tell me I reminded them of him in the way I behaved but, and I quote, 'without even a lick of his humour, you miserable bastard.' Thus, I cannot look at him in that way." He laughed a little and you cleared your throat.

"Oh.. uh, yeah I guess that makes sense. Not the humour part though, you're actually hilarious and they missed out big time." You tried to avoid the point where you'd deemed Stephen Fry sexy in every way he was similar to the man who was laying in your lap, and just hoped he wouldn't bring that up.

"He definitely got the looks side of things though, particularly as General Melchett in Goes Forth, though I am not particularly fond of the facial hair." He screwed up his nose in distaste, you fighting every ounce of your control to not say he looked a bit cute. "And certainly didn't have the waistline that 21 year old Mycroft had."

"Speaking in the third person now, are we? Well, Mycroft, Y/N is comfortable enough in her friendship that Y/N thinks Mycroft can be sexy in his own ways too." You teased, partly embarrassed, but equally just trying any way to improve the man's confidence, even by a little. Mycroft choked a little on his own saliva and had to sit up to regain his own breath. Too far? "Sorry." He shook his head 'no' but didn't speak. In his moments of regaining his composure, Mycroft watched you. Processed in his head what you had said- 'was it a joke?', he couldn't read anything on you that would suggest that, though his eyes were glassy from the choking- watched as you panicked, then subsiding the panic to concern as you made sure he was okay. All these things, he thought, he didn't deserve. He took a deep breath and reached for the television remote, pausing the show and settling back on the other side of the sofa. It had to be done now. Done while his brain was allowing it, before he got attached... before he got attached even more. He couldn't keep pretending it was okay, keep accepting your compliments and your kindness, couldn't allow himself to go any further in his.. attraction?

It was always unspoken between the two of you- your not so subtle hints to Mycroft over the last few years hadn't got unnoticed, Mycroft would be lying to himself if he didn't admit that he felt the same way, though this was perhaps the most open you had been; he would always put it off, try to think of reasons why you shouldn't be more than whatever you are now- most of the time it circles back to work, your busy schedule at the Yard and his unpredictable working hours mostly, saying to himself that it would simply be pointless, that you wouldn't see each other. But he knew that was a lie- you see him as often as you can, even if it's just for an hour on lunch, and everyone knows he would do his best to move empires to have you over for dinner had it been a while, quite literally actually.

Then there was age, you were in your mid-to-late twenties, he in his forties, though that argument also fell flat after you had mentioned your last long term relationship had been with a man your elder, amongst many of your interests in celebrity males that you had mentioned being closer to his age than yours- and, on his behalf, it was usual for a Politician to walk into formal dinners with a younger woman on arm. In the end, it all went back to the real reason Mycroft put everything off, a reason he hated admitting to even himself. Mycroft was scared.

Having been the age he is with no sexual experience, no previous relationships, and not even many friendships, he was terrified he would humiliate himself and you would leave him completely. You were both adults, both clever, you both knew there was always 'something' there, but without you ever acting upon it, Mycroft decided to live his life keeping you as a friend rather than risk not having you at all. He felt guilty enough having you here anyway. He couldn't allow you to keep stroking his hair like that, or letting you sleep in his bed with him, hold him as he snored, when it was for completely other desires in his own mind, not without speaking to you. No, that wouldn't be fair- even if he didn't fully understand everything himself and was still incredibly scared. You needed to know the truth, about everything, and, if there were the slightest chance you'd forgive him, he had decided he couldn't wait any longer, couldn't put it off anymore, he wanted you to carry on doing those things, wanted to continue the nights you would stay in his bed. But Mycroft wanted it to change, he wanted to be able to start the night with a ghost of his hand on your hip, without waiting until you were asleep to bring himself to have that courage, to wake up next to you and not feel the awkward need to move so soon, just to stay a little longer. Christ, Mycroft wanted every cliché in the book with you, and it took him until yesterday to realise how much he wanted that, after nearly losing you. And he needed you to know, even if it risked it all.

"Y/N I-"

"I know, I'm sorry, I took it too far I was just messing about.. Not that I didn't mean it, I wasn't joking about you.. You are very attractive, but it was inappropriate.. I shouldn't have said it.. I just wanted to help.. though I don't think it did, might have made it worse, actually.. Didn't want to say anything and let you find out.. like that.. not that it matters.. because I AM happy JUST being your friend, over the moon, actually.. so I don't want you to think I ruined that... Because I know you don't feel.. like that.. and you're not saying anything which is scaring me a little because you're always talking.. Not that I don't like that.. I love you talking to me, you've got a lovely voice.. and.. and I'm going to shut up again.. sorry.. again.." You rambled, a lot, too much.. far too much. Mycroft tried to process everything, his eyes closing at every word. You were making this so much harder for him, admitting everything like that. Mycroft hunched forward in his position and braced his elbows on his knees, index and middle finger of each hand holding the weight of his head by his temples.

"No just.. Just stop talking for a moment." Mycroft snapped, cutting you off as your mouth opened to speak a little, the small jump back made his gaze soften. "Please." He spoke softer, apologetic. "I can't.. talk about that.. not yet. Not until you know.." You went to speak again but his head tilted, eyes containing a rare glaze of vulnerability, trying to stay in contact with your own but constantly dropping back to his lap- a silent plea to stay quiet, be patient and just give him a moment. And you did. Turning your body completely sideways, you crossed your legs on the sofa, hands resting folded in your lap as you encouraged him to continue with a brief nod of your head. "I fear if I don't tell you of yesterday's happenings in this very moment that I never shall, and that is far too selfish, even of me." He took a deep breath in. "But I just.. need a moment. A few, likely, throughout." You nodded your head again.

From there, Mycroft began to explain everything that had happened, told you of his sister, where she had taken him, Sherlock and John, what she spoke about, what she tried to get them to do. His voice cracked every so often, knuckles whitened as his fists clenches, creases formed in his trousers where he squeezed his hand on them, but you listened to every word and stayed silent- eyes welling with small tears. Mycroft spoke of the screen, told you of the snipers that were out there, targeting Ms Hudson and Molly. Your body stiffened as he added Lestrade to the list, feeling your throat tighten a little at the mere thought of losing Greg. Mycroft pressed on, told you about how Eurus tried to make Sherlock choose between him and John, told you how he'd tried to convince Sherlock to just shoot him, how Sherlock refused and threatened to shoot himself. His voice went breathless at the end of that, the idea of losing his brother so easily still fresh in his mind. You loosened your sitting position and leaned over, taking Mycroft's hand in your own and squeezing. He sighed again and closed his eyes.

"Please, don't." He whispered, trying to fold his hand into a fist to escape your embrace. You didn't let go and offered your other hand on his back in support as you watched a stray tear fall down his cheek. "I said don't!" He shouted, moving from your touch and standing up from the sofa, beginning to pace as his face contorted into more pain, another tear following the path of the last. You sat back, watched him, didn't take the anger to heart. "It was my fault! All of it!" He ran his hands through his hair and tugged, moving them after to wipe the droplets from his cheek.

"Myc it's ok-"

"It isn't okay Y/N! No part of any of this is even remotely close to okay!" He stilled now, posture going back rigid as he looked at you, eyes bloodshot and glassy. He told you of his Birthday present to Eurus- five unsupervised minutes with Moriarty- and started his pacing again. "A man died yesterday because of me. Sherlock, John, Greg, Ms Hudson, Molly. They all almost died yesterday. You almost... you almost died yesterday." His breath hitched again, lip softly quivering at the end of his words. You tensed a little and frowned, confused and urging him to elaborate. "They weren't the only people on the screens, not the only ones with a red dot on their heads, Y/N." Gaze avoiding you now, turned completely to face the wall rather than look at you at all- giving him a chance to compose himself, steadying his voice. "I saw you, you were happy, just dancing and making tea, but at any moment you could have... and it would have been my fault. And I know I should have told you yesterday, it was selfish of me using you the way that I have without letting you know everything. You could have been gone before I could tell you everything, before I could explain how I feel about you, and it all came rushing to me the moment I saw your face on that screen. I’m so sorry, for everything, for ignoring everything, for being the reason you almost-" The last thing Mycroft had expected was the feeling of arms around his waist, the feeling of a head resting between his shoulder blades, soaking the shirt with tears. You sniffed, holding onto him tighter as you cried into his back.

"It's okay Mycroft." You spoke, voice croaking from tears. "They're okay.. I'm okay. And you're going to be okay. I'm not going anywhere." The relief Mycroft felt from your words ran through his body as he slumped a little, left hand holding on to where yours joined on his stomach, his right lifting to his eyes where, in a very rare moment, he allowed himself to weep.

***

Neither of you were too sure on how long you stayed like that, Mycroft being held in your arms as he quietly cried into his hand, you into his back, but it was long enough that your feet were beginning to ache and Mycroft had become silent a short while ago. You attempted to loosen your grip but Mycroft quickly grabbed back at your hands, holding them to him again. You changed your tactic and instead circled round until your hands remained together on his back, you now at his front and you gave him one last squeeze before guiding him backwards to the sofa, taking your place next to him but keeping your arms around him.

"I'm sorry." His voice was broken, quieter than usual. You shook your head and fought the urge to cry again.

"Don't." You spoke, sliding a hand down to hold his own that rested on his thigh. "Don't apologise Myc. You didn't do anything on purpose, you were just trying to be a good person.. a good brother. We're both still alive. Sherlock, John, Greg, Ms Hudson, Molly, they're all fine, and I have no doubt that it was partly due to you that they are still okay- whatever the three of you did in there, it worked, and that's all that matters to me." Mycroft shifted, his eyes finding yours once more, scanning, searching, trying to find anything that showed you were lying, that you didn't trust him anymore, but he couldn't find anything.

"But I-" You placed a hand at the back of his neck and leaned forward slightly, your lips meeting his briefly for a few seconds before pulling back. It wasn't desperate, or longing, or out of lust- it was everything Mycroft needed. Everything that let him know that you weren't going anywhere, that you still wanted to be around him, to be with him. He relaxed but didn't speak, his hand beneath yours just turning to allow your fingers to lace together as he let out a breath he wasn't aware he was holding. You rested your head against his shoulder, smiling softly as you felt his own rest atop yours before falling into a comfortable silence.

#mycroft #Mycroft Holmes #bbc mycroft #bbc mycroft holmes #mycroft x reader #bbc sherlock #reader insert #mycroft holmes x reader #mycroft holmes x reader smut

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council-of-readers · 3 years

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Most Notorious

Request: Would you do a male!reader x William (I'm assuming you mean pre-vampire, so late 1850's?) where reader is an upper class bachelor who revels in scandal just for the rebellion of it. I'm talking about a queer man who reads banned books while perched in a tree kind of rebellious guy. The poetic, intellectual type with more confidence than he needs trying to woo this timid blonde poet in the botanical gardens kind of fic. Idk if that's what you're looking for, but I desperately want to read that kind of fic.

This made my little gay heart so happy to write.

He was ethereal. Intangible. Unattainable.

No soul had ever seemed so beautiful to him before. Speaking with him left William feeling dazed and weak, and hungry for more. It wasn't right, he knew. If he was being honest with himself, that was part of the draw he had. Forbidden fruit, if you will. A man wholly unlike any other he had met. Besides himself.

William sat on the couch and watched him from across the party. He stood in the corner and watched the other party goers socialize, content to simply stand to the side and observe. It was a contentedness William envied. He didn't seem to care about standing or appearances. Opting to follow his own path and do as he pleased. That ability was mind boggling. To have no worries about how he was perceived, following his passions on a whim, and of course, the rumours about who he took to bed. All without paying mind to the whispers.

William stared in awe. He couldn't wrap his head around it. Around him.

Lost in his thoughts, he failed to notice that his stare had been returned. When William came back to reality, he was gone. He was looking around, trying to see where he'd wandered off to, when he felt a weight sink into the couch next to him. His heart sank in turn.

"Enjoying yourself?" the young man asked with a smirk, causing William to flush.

"Well, I, um…" he stumbled over his words. This was the first time they'd actually spoken.

He laughed, "I assumed you weren't, given the fact you are sitting here, alone, staring at strangers. Which, I don't mind. I've had worse looking men watch me."

If William wasn't red before, he certainly was now. He couldn't help the smile that crept onto his face.

"No, I don't think I am. These things are rarely entertaining for me."

His honesty surprised him, and evidently surprised the other man as well.

"Oh? Is that so?"

He panicked. This might have been a trap. A way to get William to admit something to further ruin his standing. He stood up and adjusted his coat frantically. He felt a hand on his shoulder.

"It's alright, William."

His heart skipped a beat at the sound of his name.

He took a long look around the room and gestured sarcastically, "Does this really seem like the type of place I'd enjoy being? I know we haven't ever officially met, however I'm also well aware this isn't the only social function you've spent observing me."

He let out a sigh of relief, but was still unable to fully relax. The situation was new to him, and he hadn’t quite figured out how he was supposed to act around this stranger.

"What would you say if I were to suggest we head out somewhere? Anywhere other than here. If you have suggestions, I'm more than open to them."

William nodded, "I think I'd like that very much."

He grinned and motioned for William to follow him out of the party.

His cheeks burned as the conversation around them slowed. He dreaded the rumours that'd be flying. The horrifying thought that his mother might catch wind of them made his stomach churn. She was an open minded woman, but it would hurt her heart to hear he was consorting with someone who was held in such a negative regard. It'd make it near impossible to find a wife.

Though, it wasn't like that search was going well anyhow.

They left the house and went out into the street. Night had already fallen hours ago, so they were almost entirely alone. He felt safe despite this. He didn't get the impression his companion sought to harm him.

"Where are we going?" William asked.

He just smiled, "You'll see. It's but a 20 minute walk, don't fret. We will have to take a short cut, if that's alright with you."

"Oh, um, yes that's… that's quite alright."

"Good."

They walked in silence for a while. The night air was cool, far more so than usual, and William felt himself shake despite the jacket he wore. The other man took notice.

"Cold?" He asked, smirking.

William didn't know what was so amusing.

"A bit. It's no trouble, though."

He sighed melodramatically and took off his own jacket, offering it to William. He smiled, softer and more genuine now, "If it doesn't fit over top of your own, you can just wrap it around your shoulders. It's no fun seeing such a handsome man shiver."

That damned blush was back.

William accepted and pulled the jacket over him. It just barely fit over his clothes. Something occurred to him, and he felt a little ridiculous that he hadn't thought to ask it previously.

"Um, if I may, what should I call you?"

He burst into laughter, “Are you quite serious, William? You went with me despite not even knowing my name? Am I that good looking?”

He took a moment to collect himself before answering, still chuckling a little bit, “It’s (y/n). You can call me whatever you’d like, though. I don’t much care. We’re almost there, by the way.”

William smiled at (y/n) and followed him as his pace picked up. Mud flicked up against his shoes, staining their pale leather. He found himself apathetic to this, however, much preferring to follow the enchanting man in front of him. He moved with such grace. The terrain hardly seemed to bother him, and even when a stray stone caught his foot, he regained his balance without a break in his stride.

He was so enraptured with (y/n) he failed to pay attention to the scene in front of him. His eyes widened when he saw what the road led to. There were lush green trees and a wide array of shrubbery surrounding a gorgeous white gazebo. Flowers ran up the sides of the wooden beams that supported it, wrapping around the handrails and reaching up to the roof. It was a scene out of a fairytale.

(y/n) laughed again at his expression, "Liking the view?"

He didn't wait for a response from William.

"I was sure you would," he walked up to the gazebo and gently traced the edges of a flower bud with his finger. "You seem like you'd… appreciate this. Like me. The flowers really are beautiful, aren't they? I wish they were carnations, though. Don't you?" His voice was soft and vulnerable. Trusting.

His words were loaded, William could tell. He walked up and cautiously reached out his hand. His anxiety rose. What if he was misreading the situation? Misreading his meaning? It took him a split second too long to respond, and William began to pull his hand back in shame. (y/n) smiled at him and took it, interlocking their fingers. He ran his thumb across Williams' knuckles and hummed quietly.

"Thank you. I had hoped I'd assumed correctly. I'd be horribly embarrassed if I hadn't."

William cocked his head, "I wouldn't have taken you for the kind to get embarrassed at anything."

He let out a light snort, "I'm not. Usually."

They both avoided eye contact for the moment. Preferring to simply enjoy the others' presence. It was peaceful. And he was beautiful.

They both found themselves thinking that.

#gay gay homosexual gay #btvs #btvs x reader #spike x reader #william x reader #william pratt x reader #buffy the vampire slayer #buffy fanfiction #spike x male reader #william x male reader #x male reader #btvs x male reader #mlm #gay #queer

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its-reddie123 · 3 years

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A head cannon of Richie Tozier being a hoe:

Okay first of all we don’t slut shame in this house so even though Richie is a massive hoe we respect him for it: (also note obviously they are all of age in this) (and it’s over several years/months not weeks)

-has Richie slept with all the losers? Yes yes he fucking has, do any of them know? No they definitely don’t

-the first one surprisingly wasn’t Eddie it was Stan, things had got heated one night when they were joking around in the club house when everyone had gone and Stan kissed him (partly just to shut him up), now by this point Richie had basically kissed all the losers because he’s that type of friend to suggest spin the bottle and shit like that but this time with Stan it was different and they both got very into it 👀

-Stan was the first to start taking off clothes and Richie gay panicking stumbled getting up to join him that he fell over😂 they both continued kissing and though they don’t go all the way by the end they were both spent, they almost got caught the next morning by Mike coming into the clubhouse but luckily they heard him coming before it was too late

-the next person of course was Bill, Richie had the strongest crush on him out all of the losers and for the longest, he admired him so much so it was only a matter of time before he put his foot in his mouth and let it slip, he always hinted he had crushes and all the losers but hid it behind his jokes but what happened with Bill was not that sort of situation

-At a party both Richie and Bill had found there way to the roof, both considerably drunk (but not enough that they weren’t both fully aware of what they were gunna do) Richie, actually fucking quiet for once in his life sat there trying not to stare at Bill but Bill noticed laughing “what?”

“You’re fucking gorgeous!” Richie said giving him a small shove

“What??!” Bill laughed

“You are so beautiful!”

“Shut up stop joking around” Bill laughed

“I’m not I will keep telling you till you believe me! You’re a literal god Bill and I’ve had the biggest crush on you forever...”

Then Richie realised he had got carried away and what he had said so stopped in silence he blushed

“I didn’t know you llll..liked me like that”

“Don’t go telling anyone” Richie continued to look at his feet

“Of course I won’t, ...you know I really like you like that too” Richie looked up smiling and both of them leaned to kiss

-did they do stuff on that roof? Yes yes they did, and after decided to keep things staying casual as friends cause Richie confessed he really loved Eddie and Bill understood

-who was next you may ask? well Beverly of course they fully fucked several times to tell the truth, mostly when the hung out to get high together but also just if they happened to both be horny, as they talked the most of the losers there little to absolutely no secrets between them and they both loved to be with each other as they confessed several times, they kept it very secret though and always as a friends with benefits relationship until one day they decided just be pure friends instead

-then came Ben, aaaaaaaa I can’t think of a situation Ben and Richie would ever hook up cause I see Ben as straight, you know what I got this far I’m following through

“What’s up Haystack?” Richie sat next to him on the floor of the high schools hallway leaning against lockers,

“Oh you know...stuff” tears rolling down his face as he tried to crack a smile

“What sorta stuff?” Richie said looking concerned

“I don’t feel so great about myself, and I feel very lonely sometimes”

“Marsh still hasn’t sorted her shit out?”

“No”

“Look Ben you’re an amazing guy, I think you are literally perfect, don’t worry if it’s just taking some time for others to see this”

“I’m not perfect!” he chuckled

“Did I ever tell you that I’m bi Ben?”

“ no... i didn’t know that... how’s that related though?”

“Well if you hadn’t guessed already I am totally head over heels in love with Eddie, has his noticed yet? No, am I hopeful yes cause it’s just bound to happen”

Ben leaned on Richies shoulder as the last tears fell from his face

“I’ve never kissed anyone before, no ones gunna want me” whispered Ben

“Ah see ah see well Benny boy how about we change that? I have plenty of experience” Ben lifted his head looking at Richie

“No strings attached” so Richie holding up his hands

“Okay but outside under the bleachers” even though everyone was in class it was still to risky to do in the hallway

-they kissed, Richie guiding him through making out and showing tips of where to put his hands he even through in some things he knew Beverly liked (without saying her name of course)

-Mike the man, the farmer, the rock of the group, the king, he loves Richie gets very protective over him (over all the losers tbh but Richie the most) it’s something about knowing he will keep putting his foot in his mouth and Mike knows he means no one any harm, there have been several fights Mike has broken up and saved Richies ass many times, one day they were running from Henry Bowers and his gang, after losing them a couple of blocks back they found themselves in the woods

“You okay?” Mike looked at richies black eye and broken glasses

“Well I can’t see a fucking thing but yeah I’m good” touching his under his eye gingerly “thank you for saving me! My knight in shining armour!” He said going to hug Mike but then he tripped and Mike caught him there faces very close Richie leaned in (not really sure where exactly to aim for) and kissed Mike, he pulled back realising maybe Mike wasn’t into guys out of all the losers he wasn’t really one to talk about that stuff

-but as soon as he pulled away and inch Miked lips instantly came back Richie shocked managed to trip again! And this time took Mike down with him they both laughed and continued to make out on the forest floor, did things happen?yes, yes they did, did it go all the way? yes, yes it did (I will leave it up to you to decided who was bottoming)

-so yeah Mike was richies first time fully being with a guy but of course Eddie was his second! Finally to the relief of all the losers cause the sexual tension was becoming fucking unbearable, they hooked up but not before both confessed their love each other one time when left alone at a party, Richie did also tell Eddie this wasn’t his first time but Eddie didn’t mind it was his first time and he knew Richie could/would take care of him👀

-then we come to the point of a very interesting game of two truths one lie several years later, everyone was out of their heads drunk, Richie and Bev were also stoned as hell and Richie decided this was the perfect time to say a truth of he had basically hooked up with all of the losers without any of the others knowing, his other truth was he was bi (which everyone of course already knew) and the lie that he was once abducted by aliens, so it was pretty clear straight aware it was the truth, Eddie actually found this hilarious completely understanding cause he found most of the losers very attractive as well, everyone else was in complete shock Richie immediately being bombarded with questions, but in the end everyone just ended up laughing about it and Richie was named the hoe of the group

#richie tozier #itmovie #it #it 2017 #mike hanlon #ben hanscom #beverly marsh #bill denbrough #losers club #stanley uris #reddie #eddie kaspbrak #IT #it losers #it chapter 2

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kurosawa-sun · 3 years

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Time for my ep. 8 review!!

Wow holy where do I even start. Adachi panicking over having to act normally in the office now that he & Kurosawa are officially dating is just peak office romance. And I really hope we can see the office finding out that their two boys are dating EACH OTHER (although Fujisaki would’ve already known hehe).

Also that scene of last night, when Adachi was a flustering mess and Kurosawa giggled at doing that to Adachi is EVIL (god I fucking love Kurosawa). I just love how Kurosawa now gets to openly express his desire for Adachi, I am going to die in the next few episodes seeing them flirt more openly with each other. I just love how Kurosawa and Adachi’s attraction to each other is palpable. I’ve seen sex scenes with less sexual chemistry than Adachi and Kurosawa, and the couple have only done so much as hold hands so far!!!

also Kurosawa being all giddy and high on love to the point that he was skipping in the office. I love seeing two 30 year old men get flustered, gay panic, giddy, lovestruck and be joyously in love. It’s just precious and such a special thing to see.

And then sweet precious Adachi, having that pile of clothes on the bed from figuring out his first date outfit (I’ve done that when I know I’m going to see my crush later). Also hearing him say KUROSAWA KITAAAA after the doorbell rang was ugh my heart. Adachi realizing what jealous!Kurosawa was seeing and going out there to explain that this is was not what Kurosawa was thinking was peak comedy (obligatory hamster comparison). I loved it when Adachi was introducing Tsuge and Kurosawa to each other, and Kurosawa was considerate in introducing himself as his coworker when Adachi didn’t know what to refer to him as. Also Kurosawa finding out that Adachi had talked about him with his friend, he must’ve been over the moon honestly.

I really loved seeing the friendship dynamic between Tsuge and Adachi this episode. Just two anxious introverts who get each other, it was beautiful.

And now finally the part I’ve been wanting to talk about since bearing witness to it...

KUROSAWA THE POET!! THIS LOVESTRUCK IDIOT DARE WRITE A POEM CALLED “MY BOYFRIEND” WHEN MY RECORD WAS 12 POEMS FOR ONE CRUSH! TWELVE POEMS (I literally went back to my old folders to checked, it was painful :’)

But seriously I died at that scene, and Adachi’s reaction to his boyfriend’s cheesy ass poem for him is priceless. Has Adachi realized how corny his boyfriend is yet? Well he should be. BECAUSE THAT SHIT IS CORNY AND HATE HOW MUCH I’M LIKE KUROSAWA IN LOVE/WITH A CRUSH. I seriously need a support group for people who write poetry about their crushes.

Anyway on to Tsuge and Minato,

I’m starting to like their side story, especially since they’re both artistic people who refused to go down the safe career path in order to pursue what they love. And I did like Tsuge’s speech to Minato. Although I’ve been extremely lucky that my family fully supports whatever the hell I’m doing and all of my friends are very supportive of me, I still get down about society as a whole not quite valuing the kind of work I would want to do in my life. I like Tsuge and Minato bonding over pursuing creative careers together, one of my friends (who also happened to be a crush) gave me a very thoughtful pep talk once when I was feeling very off about my writing work and it was very meaningful to me.

And now back to Kurodachi.

Adachi finally was open about dating Kurosawa, and Kurosawa expressing that his heart was about to burst at that declaration was KYAAAAAAA

I really wanted to note the little acting details here from Machida when Kurosawa said that his heart was going to burst. His breathing was a little hitched and I could see his chest reflect that. Like goddamn Kurosawa was so overwhelmed by Adachi confirming who he is to him.

And then the hand holding. SUKI KAWAII SUKI SUKI DAISUKI. Jesus christ Kurosawa is both flirtatious and smooth, yet also a huge dorky lovesick idiot. I didn’t realise I could love him even more than I already do.

Overall, I’m still amazed at how the show keeps getting better. This is such a high quality piece of television and there’s still 4 episodes left. I am both dying from the one week wait, and also not at all ready to see the full relationship on display.

(btw I am just as shocked as you are seeing Minato get kissed at the end, I was completely blindsided by that and curious to see how that gets resolved).

#cherry magic #cherry magic! thirty years of virginity can make you a wizard?!#adachi x kurosawa #adachi kiyoshi #kurosawa yuichi

57 notes · View notes

chestnut-b · 4 years

Text

Himawari Chapter 12

“I swore I’d never let my friends die, sensei. Not if there was anything I could do about it.”

This close, he could see the amber flecks in the gaze that pierced him, still searching for an answer he could fully accept.

It was almost too much to bear, so Kakashi closed his eyes, smiling.

“Maa, maybe you were too drunk to remember, sensei. But I did say we’d go together didn’t I?”

The teacher blinked, and the shoulder under Kakashi’s hand stiffened as he ducked his head.

“Idiot. You’ve got to be the biggest idiot I know, Kakashi.”

The idiot in question laughed.

Chapter 12 of a Demon Slayer AU

...Father?

It was dark, but he could have been sleeping with his head in Sakumo’s lap, just like he’d done so many times before, in the days that were awash in sunlight and the grassy smell of tatami.

There were fingers going through his hair. Warm and fond.

The hand stopped to rest lightly on the side of his forehead, and then he felt it; the warm press of lips on his brow, just over the eye that he vaguely knew, wasn’t quite his own.

His father had always been gentle, even in his sternness.

But this...this was a tenderness he’d never known.

Who?

It was at that moment his senses took over, and he suddenly became aware of the unexpected closeness of a human presence, but one he judged as familiar and non-threatening. He could also feel the extent of the exhaustion that settled in his bones.

Carefully, he opened his eyes.

The person had already stood to leave. Placing a hand on the door, it was carefully slid open, causing Kakashi to squint at the sudden shift in brightness. His left eye began to ache at the unintended exposure, and yet, he found himself unable to look away.

Dark hair over a sea-blue haori, bathed in the first light of morning.

Kakashi tried his best to form some coherent thoughts, but his vision began to swim, and his eyelids soon took on the weight of lead. A peaceful darkness began to settle, almost seemingly in tandem with the closing door before him. But just before it took him completely, a ghost of a voice echoed in his head.

Don’t go.

It might have been his own.

-----------------------------------------

“Good morning, Hashira-sama.”

So he said, but the shadows on the ground told him clearly it was just a couple of hours before sunset. He found the teacher sitting under the tree again, presumably off duty, with his face buried in one of the books he’d received from Sarutobi. Kakashi felt his eye twitch, and without so much as a word of warning, plonked himself next to the man, leaning back heavily onto the teacher’s shoulder.

“Hey?!”

“Sorry,” Kakashi murmured, folding his arms over himself. “But you looked a little too comfortable and I kind of got jealous.” He grumbled, shifting and squirming against his junior until he was perfectly satisfied, choosing all the while not to react to the small cries of protest from the teacher.

“Seriously…?” Came the utter of disbelief.

But before long, Iruka started to shift against him, just as determined to make himself comfortable while also being resigned to his fate as a human headrest. When he’d finally settled, Kakashi closed his weary eyes, allowing the subtle breeze, the rustle of trees, the chirping of birds, and the warmth of the body behind him to lull him into a peaceful doze.

“...Thank you.”

It was soft, but not quite a whisper.

“Hmm? I don’t remember doing anything to be thanked for.” He replied sleepily.

Iruka elbowed him gently in the rib, eliciting a chuckle.

“Well...if you really want to thank me…tell me a story.”

He felt Iruka‘s head turn, puzzled. “A story?”

Kakashi nodded lazily against the palm of his hand. “Mmhmm, from one of the books Sarutobi brought back. I saw your notes, sensei~”

There was a soft laugh. “Nothing escapes that eye of yours does it.” There might have been a hint of sarcasm there, but Kakashi was too tired to do anything other than allow Iruka’s voice to carry him into a warm, pleasant afternoon.

-----------------------------------------

Kakashi found peace easy to get used to.

There were days spent drinking tea, or dozing under the tree in the courtyard while Iruka narrated a story, sometimes with a hound sleeping in his lap.

On some mornings he’d peek into the teacher’s classroom, where the children followed him with wide, keen eyes as he read from his textbook. Kakashi had heard it often enough to wonder; if that voice that seemed to draw people in was yet another thing Iruka had inherited from his ancestor. He couldn’t be sure.

After lunch, there would be Hashira training to conduct, and to evade, much to Iruka’s chagrin. For on more than a few occasions, he’d slip into the room where the teacher hid, going through stacks of books filled with children’s scrawlings. He would pretend to complain for a while, but even with Kakashi’s back against him, they’d eventually fall into a comfortable silence. The summer cicadas would cry in the stiff heat of the afternoon, and more and more often, Kakashi awoke to find Iruka, slumped over the desk, asleep on his folded arms.

He favoured a few select methods to awaken his slumbering friend, each with their own unique reward. A few good pokes to the cheek would produce an annoyed glare, ruffling his hair would elicit a petulant groan of protest. But what always proved most amusing was a cupped hand to his ear and a whispered wake-up call. It never failed to yield a panicked yelp of surprise, and a face ablaze.

There was one unfortunate incident however, when he’d loomed too long over his sleeping quarry. Gai’s messenger had chosen that exact moment to land at the open door, and the shrill cry of the damned bird caused the teacher to snap awake, the back of his head connecting with Kakashi’s chin with a painful crack.

What followed was a rather impressive string of curses from them both.

“Serves you right, idiot.” The younger man had muttered, pressing a cloth to a masked, split lip. Kakashi had seen him do the same many times; on crying children and their skinned knees and elbows, not so much on fully grown Hashira. But in the end, he’d grinned like the idiot he was, and despite his best efforts to resist, so had Iruka.

Much like the year before, he accompanied the brothers to town on their visit to the apothecary, and Kakashi paid for the ramen afterwards with his generous stipend without complaint. When he wasn’t placated with food, Naruto continued to glare at him as if his brother would be spirited away the moment his back was turned, but much like Iruka on his bomb-making days, he never failed to surprise.

He’s quick to learn. Good instincts too. Kakashi mused one night, side-stepping an attack that might have just grazed him if he were any less serious. Iruka, watching on the edges, looked particularly pleased; it had been his request to have him start training the boy in earnest, even if it was just with wooden swords.

Like a summer daydream, the days passed in an uneventful haze. A haze so comfortable, it might have been enough for Kakashi to push the thoughts of the ever looming threat out of his mind, if only for a day.

Then came one afternoon, while approaching the tearoom, a wet, struggling cough stopped him in his tracks. He pushed open the doors, only to see his shadow fall upon Iruka’s kneeling figure upon the tatami.

He’d tried to keep his clenched fist from view, but couldn’t hide the red smear at the corner of his lips. Even then, he smiled. But it wasn’t the one that appeared above a bowl of hot noodles, or the one that greeted him when he’d been successfully roused from his morning nap.

It was the one that, for the first time in his life, made Kakashi feel the urge to break something.

Instead of acting on it, he’d knelt before Iruka, and gently pried the clenched fist open. Just barely trembling, the wrist in his hand betrayed the cool, almost resigned look on the teacher’s face. Both their gazes focused on the same spot.

Just a few specks of blood now smeared on his palm. Almost laughably insignificant compared to the heinous wounds he’d seen in battle, and yet...

“Don’t tell Naruto.”

Just like that, the summer daydream came to an end.

Now, between the recurring dreams of the faceless dead, or the memories of comrades and friends long gone, Kakashi felt it; the slow gnawing of unease, and a familiar, creeping sense of foreboding.

He wasn’t sure what had given it away. But while accompanying the man on a patrol on a quiet night, they’d passed through a red torii gate, and Iruka had turned to look him in the eye.

“Will you be leaving us soon?”

A completely neutral delivery. Kakashi knew it, but the question had felt almost accusatory. It might have even stung more than he cared to admit.

“Ah. Naruto seems to be doing well enough.”

In the darkness, he might have imagined the flash of disappointment in the gaze that was quickly cast towards the ground.

“I received word this afternoon. Jiraiya-sama will be arriving in a week.” Iruka said matter-of-factly.

“And I’m sure he’ll do a good job, as he always does.” Kakashi tried his best to sound assuring, but judging by Iruka’s unconvinced expression, he wasn’t entirely successful.

“Jiraiya-sama never stays for long, and tends to be rather...distracted. Naruto may not admit it, but he’s learned a lot from training with you.”

“We still have time.”

“Not enough, not for Naruto.”

Kakashi couldn’t argue with that.

“Has he ever beaten you in a fight?”

Iruka’s lips broke into a wry smile. “He’s eight. And do you think he’d ever be completely serious against me?” Sighing, he looked up to meet Kakashi’s gaze.

“But I suppose this might be for the best.” he concluded.

“What do you mean?”

“I’m sure you know it better than anyone, Kakashi-san. Your time and skills aren’t best utilised here are they?”

There it was again, that sting of undeniable truth. In all the little ways, Iruka was probably the only person he’d let get under his skin like this.

Some nights, I can’t help but wonder. How many people are dying while I’m sitting here, enjoying your company.

Even you.

“As long as I’m here, I won’t be able to find Orochimaru. I can wield a sword against any demon, Iruka, but…I can’t fight a curse.”

There was a hitched breath, and Iruka’s eyes widened before quickly narrowing with a pained expression, his fists clenched at his sides.

“There’s no guarantee, Kakashi-san.”

It was whispered with a voice that dared not hope.

When they’d first parted ways a year ago, the Hashira had said something similar. In hindsight, it had been almost flippant in comparison; the steel behind his resolve was nowhere near what it was now.

“True, but you never know till you try, right?”

Kakashi stepped towards him, and placed a firm hand on the teacher’s shoulder.

“I swore I’d never let my friends die, sensei. Not if there was anything I could do about it.”

This close, he could see the amber flecks in the gaze that pierced him, still searching for an answer he could fully accept.

It was almost too much to bear, so Kakashi closed his eyes, smiling.

“Maa, maybe you were too drunk to remember, sensei. But I did say we’d go together didn’t I?”

The teacher blinked, and the shoulder under Kakashi’s hand stiffened as he ducked his head.

“Idiot. You’ve got to be the biggest idiot I know, Kakashi.”

The idiot in question laughed.

---------------------------------------------------------------

A week later, in the darkness of the forest, the sparkling river of the Milky Way stretched across the sky like an ethereal bridge.

Izumo and Kotetsu had made a brief announcement at dinner, and later that night returned from the wilderness with satisfied grins, carrying several stalks of young bamboo over their shoulders.

There was a small gathering at the main pavilion, lit softly by paper lanterns. Soon the children and even some of the other slayers were busying themselves writing down wishes on strips of coloured paper. Kakashi had been handed one by a clearly amused Iruka, but he just looked at it sleepily before slipping it into his haori.

“Sakura-chan, what are you wishing for?”

“If I tell you it’s not going to come true!”

Some wrote with a smile, some laughed. But there were a few who sat quietly, staring at their papers with somber expressions. The memories of what once was, still too fresh in their minds.

Kakashi watched as Iruka moved between them. He couldn’t hear the words among the hushed voices, but he could see the teacher’s hands; a pat on the head, resting reassuringly on small shoulders, guiding tiny fingers to the grip of a brush.

It brought back memories of Sakumo, chiding him for writing wishes too dreary for the child that he was, but his smile was always fond and gentle. When his father had gone to sleep, he’d sneak out to see what the man had written for his own.

Every year, they were always the same.

May Kakashi grow up strong and healthy.

May demons find peace in the afterlife.

May Kakashi find happiness of his own.

Things like that.

When Iruka had finished guiding the children, he stood before the bamboo stalks together with the two gate guards, helping to put up the paper strips. Slowly, the group started thinning as the children returned to their rooms, led by the adults.

Having waited their turn, Sakura approached, with Naruto and Lee in tow.

“Iruka-sensei! I wished to get much, much stronger!”

“I wished for ramen!”

There was an unmissable sigh.

“Maybe you better write down a few more, Naruto.”

The two boys were obviously too happy to do just that.

Meanwhile, Sakura passed her slip to the teacher, and looked at him thoughtfully as he strung it onto a branch. She spoke so softly that Kakashi could only catch the tail end of it.

“They must miss each other...it’s a little sad.”

Iruka crouched before the girl and smiled, patting her on the head.

“That’s true, it must be lonely.” He lifted his head to look up to the stars. “But I’m sure they always have each other in their thoughts. Maybe it’s not so bad?”

Sakura’s gaze followed, and she spent several long moments staring into the sky. There was a soft, shaky whimper, and Kakashi watched Iruka’s expression soften as he pulled her into a warm embrace, carrying her as he stood.

“Lee, Naruto, time for bed.”

“Aw, but I haven’t got mine up!”

Kakashi walked up to the boys, and plucked the tanzaku from their hands.

“I’ll help you with those.”

“Thank you, Kakashi-san.”

Iruka looked at the girl in his arms, as if recalling something, before turning to Kakashi. Maybe the teacher had let his gaze linger skyward too long, but he thought he may have spotted a flicker of remaining starlight in those dark eyes.

“We’ll see you in the morning, Kakashi-san. Have a good rest.”

With that, he led the three back to their rooms. The Hashira turned to the bamboo display, now laden generously with colourful streams and written wishes.

I want a family again some day.

I hope my parents are resting peacefully.

May demons disappear one day for good.

He started to put up the last ones, catching a glimpse of Naruto’s signature scrawl as he strung it up.

I hope Iruka-nii gets better.

It didn’t take long to find another familiar script, this time hidden under layers of branches and leaves.

May Naruto have all the happiness he deserves.

May the children find the strength they need to live in this world.

There was one more. He took it gently in his hand and smiled.

Safe journeys for Kakashi-san, so that he may visit again next year.

-----------------------------------------

By the time Iruka managed to pry Naruto from his futon, Kakashi was already waiting at the gates. The boy rubbed the sleep from his eyes as he followed behind him. Izumo and Kotetsu had just completed their shift not long ago, leaving the three of them alone at the entrance.

“But you’ll be back won’t you?”

It was a very Naruto farewell, for Kakashi, at least.

“Uh huh. Well, if the demons don’t get me first, you guys will be seeing me next year too.”

He spotted Naruto casting a worried glance Iruka’s way, before directing a pointed glare back at the Hashira.

“You’d better. I’m going back to sleep. See you around, Kakashi-sensei.”

The boy turned to trod back to his room.

Looking at his retreating figure, Iruka sighed.

“That’s it? I’m sorry, Kakashi-san, it’s hard to understand that boy sometimes.”

“Hmm...I’m not so sure about that.”

They started to walk in comfortable silence, just like the year before. This time though, they’d continued together much further.

Above them, the first light of dawn lit the sky in a wave of purple and pink. Hikoboshi and Orihime had long since moved on, but the trailing stars still remained, like the last glimmers of sand on the shore.

In the middle of the sunflower field, just a few paces from where they first met, the two turned to face one another, but their gazes did not meet. For a while, neither spoke, unwilling to start the beginning to another end.

Eventually, it was Iruka who broke the silence.

“It was good to see you again.”

“Aw, that’s all, sensei?”

Iruka raised a hand to scratch at his scar, and Kakashi leaned towards him.

“How about, I hope to see you again next year?”

The teacher quickly looked away.

“I hope you know...that it goes without saying.” He’d made an impressive effort this time, only the slightest tinge of red stained his cheeks.

Kakashi hummed happily, drawing back. Iruka reached out, offering his hand, the same one he’d held on that sobering day in the tearoom.

“May fortune go with you, Kakashi-san.”

A gentle hold, and then a ghost of a squeeze.

If Kakashi had let his palm linger a little too long, Iruka showed no signs of minding it. Before he could react, Kakashi wrapped an arm around the younger man’s shoulder, and drew him firmly to his chest.

“Don’t lose hope, Iruka.”

He found himself silently grateful that he couldn’t see the face that was now resting against his left shoulder. Kakashi was sure the expression would have pained him.

Iruka took a deep, shaky breath against him, and nodded quietly.

Not entirely willing, he let the man go, and faced him with the biggest grin he could muster.

“Send me off with a smile, sensei! I won’t be able to sleep at night if that’s the last thing I see.”

Iruka let out a pained laugh, and rubbed the bridge of his nose, just above the scar, as he was prone to do. With a determined breath, he did as requested, and faced him with a smile not unlike the morning sun.

“You’d better get going, Kakashi.”

And so he did, but just before Iruka was too far to hear him, he’d turned around and waved.

“I’ll bring a gift even better than Sarutobi’s next year, so you better stay alive to see it!”

There might have been just a tiny, challenging smirk on the teacher’s face as he waved back.

“I’ll be looking forward to it!”

-------------------------------------------------------------------

An hour later, passing through a wisteria grove, Kakashi spied Jiraiya’s familiar towering form leaning against a tree, his expression unimpressed. By his side, Guruko waited patiently, tail wagging as soon as she caught sight of her master.

“You were never great at taking suggestions, Kakashi.” the retired Hashira chided.

“Whatever could you be referring to?”

“Take it from someone who’s been there. Befriending a Senju will yield nothing but pain.”

“I’m perfectly familiar with it. But you know, maybe I’m just a glutton for punishment.” Kakashi drawled.

Jiraiya snorted, but he still looked decidedly grim.

“Iruka’s coping for now. You could say he’s exceeded expectations in every way.” The older man moved to stand before him. “But from what I’ve seen, it just means the end will be-”

“Sorry, I’m not interested in hearing that part.”

“Kakashi!”

“I’ll do whatever it takes before that happens.” he stated, voice edged in steel.

“By the way, Naruto’s almost ready to start breath training, so he’s in your capable hands.”

“Already...”

“You don’t sound surprised.” He flashed the older man a probing glance.

“The Kyuubi grants exceptional strength to their vessel. What’s surprising about that?” Jiraiya shrugged, seemingly nonchalant about it.

“I was told the seal’s meant to keep the Kyuubi’s influence at bay, at least until the vessel’s ready to wield it.”

Jiraiya’s silence in the wake of his statement didn’t sit well with him.

“Was it not strong enough?” Kakashi pried.

Jiraiya rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “If his growth seems abnormal, the seal…...may be lacking in some aspects. Kushina and Minato weren’t in the best state when they set it, but you knew that.”

Unpleasant memories. Not something Kakashi wanted to dwell on at this point.

Does Iruka know? He wanted to ask, but something in the pit of his stomach was telling him he wouldn’t like the answer. Whatever it was, it made no difference; he couldn’t return, not until his search yielded some results. If the Kyuubi’s presence was in danger of making itself known, all the more he needed to hurry.

He faced Jiraiya with a slight bow. “I’ll leave them both to you then.”

“Naruto is straight forward enough, honestly. I can’t say I’ll be of much help with Iruka though. He’s...difficult.” He strained, scratching the back of his head in frustration.

Kakashi chuckled as he bent down to favour Guruko, who’d been patiently waiting on the sides, with a good scratch.

“I’m not taking it back, Kakashi.” Jiraiya warned.

“Thank you for the heads up, but I think I’ll take my chances.”

--------------------------------------------------

Iruka had watched Kakashi’s receding figure disappear from sight, before releasing the breath he didn’t know he had been holding. He looked heavenward to the last remaining stars before daybreak, and sent a silent prayer to the only people that he knew for sure, were watching.

Mother, Father, please watch over him.

He started to turn, readying himself to walk the way he came. Against his better judgement, he gave the field one final glance.

Other than the flock of magpies that flew past overhead, he was very much alone.

It didn’t take long before he was standing at the gates. He walked up to the bamboo display propped up against it, and as he did every year since he’d arrived, started reading each slip of paper one by one.

Just like the last, it was a bittersweet experience.

Naruto’s handwriting hasn’t gotten any better. Shame on me.

And then Iruka saw it, the signature he’d become familiar with, looked forward to seeing, even. It was brushed on a slip of tanzanku that was hanging right next to one of his own, the prayer for a safe return.

He reached, cradling the slip in the same palm the wish-maker had held once; with a gentleness that reminded him painfully of happier times.

May Iruka see all his wishes come true, and live to make many more.

Later that morning, he enlisted the help of Izumo and Kotetsu in moving the bamboo to an isolated clearing on the edges of the shrine compound.

“We’ll leave it to you, Iruka!” With that, they hurried back to their post.

He watched them go with relief. Now, more than ever, Iruka was thankful to be alone. Though, if he took the time to acknowledge the circle of trees that towered over him, he might have felt as if he was on the receiving end of impending judgement.

Standing above the pile of bamboo, he reached into his haori, and retrieved a paper seal. There was only the slightest trace scent of gunpowder. It’d taken a while to develop too, he thought detachedly as he crouched. With two fingers, he set the tag on top of the pile.

Perhaps he’d been unconsciously searching for it, but he spotted the two tanzaku he and Kakashi had penned, still side-by-side, out of the corner of his eye.

He turned his attention back to the seal under his fingertips. Seconds later, it burst into flames, and Iruka stared in silence as the fire spread.

As both their wishes slowly disintegrated into black ash, Iruka squeezed his eyes shut in one last prayer; not for guidance, or for safety or health, but for forgiveness.

-----------------------------------------

End of Chapter 12

-----------------------------------------

Ahhhh! Apologies for the delay for this chapter. It was a tough one to write, and one where I really felt my inexperience with writing most acutely. Ideally it really should have been released during Tanabata. .___.;; (Mid-July)

I also got weirdly awkward about writing this fic for some reason, lol. But if you enjoyed reading it so far, that’s great!

The art for this chapter for something I’d initially planned for a later one, but it felt right at home here, so here it is! It’s a favourite of mine, and I hope you like it too.

Again, your comments are always loved and appreciated. See you in the next chapter! (Which I promise, will finally see some action!)

Terminology

Tanabata Festival:

Yearly festival in Japan during the summer to celebrate the meeting of two star-crossed lovers, Hikoboshi and Orihime. Magpies form a bridge (the Milky Way), and they can only meet once a year, but only if the weather is clear. People write their wishes on tanzaku, and hang them on bamboo. The next day, the bamboo is either floated down a river, or burned.

#kakairu #iruka #kakashi #umino iruka #iruka umino #iruka sensei

116 notes · View notes

immortalcoelacanth · 4 years

Text

HLVRAI Oneshot: A Goodnight (Kiss) Passport Check

*kicks down door*

FUCK I HAVE FALLEN INTO ANOTHER FANDOM AND CANNOT GET OUT! I would like to blame my friends (you know who you are) for dragging me into this pit and causing me to get inspired to write things, so BEHOLD!

A FLUFF ONESHOT BASED ON THE ABSCOND AU CREATED BY @godros(not that you really need to know about that AU for context as it’s just... fluff, but check it out if you’re interested!)

Word count: 1412

Summary: Even in his dreams, Benrey just had to check Gordon’s passport.

Gordon was, to put it bluntly, exhausted.

Aside from his typical work, he had also been more involved in the lives of his… friends.

Could he call them that? Friends? Technically they were nothing more than data and code, but they felt real. They engaged with him, spoke with him, and acted like they all cared about him in their own way.

Even Bubby, who never failed to point out how much he dragged the Science Team down at times, expressed his own concern when he faltered or got “hurt”.

Always with a near excessive amount of cursing, but it was concern nonetheless!

And then there was Benrey.

The asshole troll who was always asking about his passport or playing games with him on the Playstation. His snide comments and quips were intermingled with jokes, making it challenging to read his emotions and figure out how he actually felt about things.

Benrey was an enigma of sorts, someone who enraged and intrigued Gordon. As such it was all the more emotionally draining when interacting with the AI, leaving him mentally and physically exhausted.

Hey, moving your arms around a bunch might be great for building up muscle, but doing such a thing for a long period of time made them feel like led. Plus, there was the struggle of trying to get his gear off after every session and clean up any messes he made, he still needed to replace that lamp after one of his earlier sessions...

So, it was no surprise when Gordon passed out at his desk, head buried in his arms as he snored away. The monitor in front of him was shut off, all computing tasks done for the day. His VR gear was strewn around the desk here and there, and all was silent in the room.

Silent, that is, until the monitor slowly turned back on.

The screen glowed with a faint light, showing nothing but a grey expanse. Movement happened somewhere beyond it, causing the screen to ripple as though it were made of water. A disturbing sight made all the more worrisome as a pair of hands appeared.

First poking at the fluid barrier, causing it to ripple further before eventually reaching through to the sleeping man beyond. Gordon was still snoring away, completely unaware of what was going on as one of the hands poked at his face while the other picked up a lock of his hair and gently felt it.

Seeing that the man did not wake up from the touch, the owner of the hands decided to kick things up a notch. Both of Gordon’s forearms were gripped, not too tightly, and he was yanked through the screen.

Nothing broke or tore, there were no sounds of pain of electrical malfunctions. All was as silent and peaceful as it had previously been.

On this side of the screen, that is, but on the other side things were not quite as calm. Benrey stood over the still sleeping leader of the Science Team, arms crossed and grinning to himself as he took in the humorous sight before him.

Gordon was crumpled over and somewhat folded in half as he continued to sleep, oblivious to everything that had happened. Suppressing a snicker, Benrey gently booted the slumbering man in the side and spoke.

“nice landing, feetman.”

Funnily enough, it was the butchering of his last name that caused Gordon’s eyes to snap open. He immediately noticed his predicament and flailed, resulting in him falling onto his side while Benrey started laughing loudly, smacking a hand against the front of his helmet as a smile took over his face.

It was always Gordon who made him smile…

A faint chill ran down his spine, Benrey’s good mood evaporating in an instant while the panicked man finally managed to detangle himself and stand up. He brushed off his clothes and looked at the empty space they were both in, a sea of grey. His brows narrowed in confusion.

“Benrey? You-what happened? Where the hell is this?!”

“you’re… uh... dreaming, bro.” Benrey lazily waved his hands in the air while he spoke, as if to emphasize his point. “that’s pretty gay, you… you gaydon feetman now or somethin’?”

“DREAM-stOP TALKING ABOUT MY FEET!” If he was dreaming, Gordon was certain he would pop a blood vessel in no time if this conversation kept up. “And the only kind of dream I’d have with you in it would be a nightmare!”

“ouch, bro… that’s kinda mean.” Despite the words, Benrey’s tone continued to be void of any emotion other than mild amusement, and it only continued to set Gordon off.

“YOU’RE KIND OF MEAN! You keep harassing me for my passport and you KILLED all those other scientists and guards-”

“yeah well they… uh… suck at their jobs. i… i gotta fire bad employees bro-”

“WITH A GUN?!”

“ya it’s-it’s standard procedure and… uh… stuff. ask tommy about it later or whatever.”

Gordon pressed the bridge of his nose between his finger and thumb, exhaling sharply as he felt a headache begin to build behind his eyes. “Okay, wonderful, lovely. Are there any other morally grey questions I need to ask?”

“nah but you uhhhh gotta show me your passport.”

And now Gordon was squatting on the ground, not able to fully process the request. “Well I told you I didn’t have it! And I’m apparently dreaming anyways! Do-do I need a dream passport or something?!”

“ya.”

His legs gave out under him, resulting in the exasperated man now sitting on the ground and staring up at Benrey in pure befuddlement and rage. “You-I don’t have it! When will you get that through your thick skull?”

“nah, you do.”

“I-WHAT?”

As Gordon contemplated everything leading up to this moment, and why in the world his mind had decided to torment him tonight, Benrey made his move.

“i’ll, uh, check it for you. cause we’re… uh... bros’n stuff.”

Before he could ask what this checking would entail, and what Benrey was even checking in the first place, the security guard leaned down and pressed a quick kiss against Gordon’s lips.

He was speechless.

“mhm, everything’s… uh… up to code there.” Benrey noted, nodding to himself before sitting down beside the stunned man. An eternity seemed to pass before Gordon managed to speak up.

“W-What was that?”

“i checked your passport, man. nothin’ special.”

“I…” Gordon sighed and buried his face in his hands. “I’m gonna stop questioning things because you never answer anything I ask and you’re the most obnoxious, unreliable person I’ve ever met-”

“you say somethin’ dude?”

“... No.” He muttered, thoroughly fed up with the situation. “I’m gonna go back to sleep and wake up back at my desk and everything’s gonna be perfectly fine and I won’t have you tormenting me. Yeah, that’s what I’m gonna do.”

“aw, lame. i thought we were gonna… uh, play some games.”

“Nope, sleeping now.”

“brooooooo i can’t believe you’re leaving me hanging like thiiiiiiiiis.”

“I’m not leaving you hanging since I never agreed to anything.”

“bro,” Benrey let out his own sigh, a stream of blue escaping his mouth and causing Gordon to yawn due to how close he was to the other man.

Actually, had he gotten closer to him? Previously there had been some space between them, but now they were both shoulder to shoulder. Gordon blinked and tried to speak, but found a yawn escaping his mouth when he opened it.

Damn, of course he felt like passing out when he wanted to ask questions. Stupid sweet voice…

As if somehow knowing what Gordon was thinking about, Benrey let out a short laugh as the other man started leaning against him due to his growing exhaustion.

“sweet dreams, gaydon feetman.”

When Gordon next awoke, he found himself seated in front of his computer as usual. The monitor was still off, everything was exactly where he had put it, and there was no sign of anything being disturbed. He stretched a bit, feeling his back pop as his bones cracked, before scratching his chin.

“Huh, maybe it was a dream…”

Of course, during his next encounter with Benrey later on in the day he did notice a faint redness to the other’s cheeks and wondered all over again if that “passport check” had been real or not.

And a much quieter part of him wanted to ask whether he had passed or not.

#my story #fanfiction #hlvrai #hlvrai gordon #hlvrai benrey #gordon and benrey are wholesome gay #fluff #benrey is smooth as fuck #gordon is just confused #hlvrai au #abscond au

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sincerlypadfoot · 3 years

Text

The Fifth Marauder (Chapter Eight)

Word Count-1.9K

Send Requests Here

Harry's First Birthday

It was a shining day on July 31st 1981, my curtains blocked most of the sun that came in which I was grateful about. One thing I was not grateful about this shining morning.

“Good morning, get up get up!” Sirius Black shouted barging into my room. “I do not know what to get Harry, his birthday is today and I don’t know what to get him,” He cried out falling onto my bed.

“Sirius, just because i’m letting you stay with me, does not mean you can just barge into my room.” I groaned pulling the blanket up to my chest and rolling onto my side, shutting my eyes once more.

“How are you not panicking yet, you haven’t bought him anything yet either and your his godmother!” Sirius pulled onto the blanket causing me to get angry.

“Sirius Black,” I cried out sticking my arm out of my blanket and reaching for my wand. “Accio birthday gift,” I felt a box fall onto my stomach and Sirius gasping.

“What did you get him?” Sirius asked picking up the box, I quickly sat up and took the box from him.

“You’ll see when Harry opens it,” I paused placing the medium sized box beside me. “Sirius, think about it, what do you think Harry will like, and will use in the future,”

Sirius stayed silent for a moment, thinking to himself, his head was pointed down, and his skin was glowing from the light admitting behind the curtain, I looked on his back, admiring the tattoos he had gotten throughout the years.

“I’ve got it!” Sirius shouted standing up. “Thank you Ellie, thank you so much,” Sirius ran out of the room, slamming the door making me smile and lean back in my bed, preparing myself for the rushed day it was going to be, I rolled my eyes at the nickname he had given me.

I pushed my blankets off of me, covering the shining blue wrapped box, thanks to magic.

For almost four years, Sirius Black had been living in my tiny apartment, at his request, since he hadn’t want to bother the Potters after they got married and Remus was to far of a neat freak for Sirius so he had moved in here.

“Sirius!” I called out looking around my apartment, from my room Sirius room laid across, with a bathroom at the complete end of the hall, then a long hallway entering the living room, which was fairly large for the most part then the kitchen turning left.

“I’m leaving, I promise i’ll be back in the hour!” Sirius called out from his room, I rolled my eyes walking into the bathroom and shutting the door, my towel laid still, which wasn’t all a problem but since it wasn’t where I last put it, caused a problem.

“Quick using my towel Sirius!” I yelled as I turned the water on and started undressing myself. Locking the door with my wand, not wanting any unwanted visitors. The water quickly became hot and I jumped in, enjoying, again, the peace and quiet.

“Sirius is gone, please tell me what you got Harry!” Remus shouted walking into the bathroom. “Please,”

I stuck my head out of the curtain and looked at the boy who didn’t even live close to our house. “Remus get out of my house, I am not telling you and i’m naked!”

“And i’m gay, come on tell me,” Remus sat down on our sink crossing his arms, I shook my head sticking my head back into the shower.

“What did you get Harry?” I asked washing my hair, slowly unbothered by Remus who hummed to himself.

“Whatever Sirius gets him, did you not hear us last night agreeing on what to get the boy,” Remus shouted, I rolled my eyes sticking my soapy head back out.

“No, but you guys should also learn to silence yourselves, some people like peace and quiet well sleeping,” Remus’ face went bright red as I finished my sentence.

“Yeah, if you could, keep it a secret, that would be greatly appreciated y/n,” I stuck my head, once again back in the shower and continued to wash my hair. “You think Sirius actually likes me, or you know, cause i’m so irresistible sexy,”

I snorted at the end of his sentence, getting soap in my eye in the process. “Yeah I think you might be right Remus, only liking you for your irresistible ness,” I joked rolling my eyes paused and shutting off the shower and grabbing my towel and wrapping it around myself. “No Remus,” I paused getting out of the shower covered. “He likes you, all he does is talk about you, don’t come barging into my room now,” I walked out of the bathroom and back into my room letting a breath out and shutting my door, locking it again.

“Oh come on, you can’t just tell me that and not give me any more information, what does he talk about, does he like my hair, does he think i’m weird!” Remus banged on my door, I rolled my eyes, dropping my towel and walking naked over towards my dresser.

“Move out of the way, i’ve got this!” Sirius yelled, I heard my locket click, I grabbed my wand, shutting my door.

“I am naked! I will be out in a second, go make out with each other and leave me alone or i’ll kick you out Sirius, personal space!” I screamed slamming my door shut with my hands now. “You both like each other, do something about it, or clean the house, anything!”

“Sorry y/n,” The pair whispered walking away.

“Do you actually like me?” I heard Sirius say making me smile, I turned back around and took a pair of nice jeans out of my dresser and a long wool sweater, slipping them on quickly.

“Are you guys ready to go?” I yelled out grabbing my wand and present, then swung my door open, Sirius had Remus pinned against the wall, causing my hands to swing over my eyes.

“Yes, Sirius get off of him,” Remus mocked, removing his hands from Sirius chest and watching Remus use all his force to push Sirius off. “We decided on getting Harry a shared gift,” His smile lit the whole room for Sirius who stood holding a long shaped box in his hands.

“Come on Remus, y/n, we’ve got a birthday party to attend too,” Sirius smiled brightly, grabbing the floo powder from the fireplace. “Godric's hollow!” The green fire covered Sirius, leaving Remus and I.

“Race you!” I shouted chuckled, darting to the fireplace, Remus and I both managing the fit in.

“Godric's hollow!” Remus shouted and the smoke took over the both of us, we ended up infront of Sirius who looked around the house

“They’re not home, we’re home alone,” Sirius chuckled helping the two of us out of the fireplace. “Must be out, what should we do,”

I smirked looking around the house, undecorated. “Why don’t we charm this place up, i’m sure there are a few things we can pull out our asses,” I chuckled walking into the living room.

“This is why your the smart one here,” Sirius hummed kissing the top of my head and pulling his wand out of his pocket.

I walked into the kitchen, grabbing a empty glass and pointing my wand down. “Aguamenti,” water appeared and I chuckled it down, ready to decorate.

“Herbivicus!” Sirius shouted causing both Remus and I to turn around with a smile, the plants that were nearly buds were now fully grown, Lilies and tulips hung on the window ledges.

After a hour of decorating the house, balloons hung up, a large one in the middle of the living room and two presents beside the one made the three smile.

“Harry we’re home,” Lily brightly said, but her voice stopped and little “o”s came out of her mouth.

“Surprise!” Sirius, remus and I all shouted jumping out of the living room with a smile, looking a baby Harry, James who had a giant smile from ear to ear and Lily who looked like she was going to cry.

“Let me see my godson, big boy Harry,” Sirius excitedly jumped, walking over to Harry and taking him out of Lilys arms, cooing in his face.

“You guys really surprised us,” James walked over to us, pulling Remus and I into a hug.

“We’re glad,” I whispered holding onto James. “What did you guys do today?” I asked as we all let go.

“Brought Harry for ice cream and picked him out some new clothes, isn’t that right James,” Lily pipped in, bringing me into a hug. “I’m glad you’ve done this love, it’s lovely,”

“Come on Harry, I wanna show you what Uncle Remus and I got you,” Sirius ran passed the four of us, causing Harry to burst into laughing, Lily looked worried but calm at Sirius

“Me first,” I smiled grabbing my light blue gift and sitting down beside Harry who crawled onto my lap. “Here you go little guy,” I pushed the box lightly to Harry, letting him unwrap it.

“Box!” Harry shouted, making everyone burst into a fit as he looked a plan white box, Harry was everyone's pride and joy, and the boy would have everyone killed for him to live.

“Open it buddy,” I whispered, helping him a bit more, his hand reached into a box, pulling out a snowglobes. A little boy, brown hair sat on the ground infront of a large snowman, alone.

“Oh y/n, it’s amazing,” James said a bit confused. “What is it?” He asked causing Lily to lightly shove his shoulder.

I grabbed my wand from beside him, looking at Harry with a smile then placing my wand on the top, I watched as five figures came out, Lily and James hand in hand, Sirius and Remus also hand in and then I who came out, snow fell down.

“It’s beautiful,” Lily whispered, Harry looked down, admiring and laughing as he watches all the figures inside do their own thing.

“I figured, if pictures could move, I could do it with anything, it’s simple to stop, and I thought he’d love it,” I leaned down, planting a kiss on Harry's head, he smiled looking down still.

“Us next,” Sirius jumped up, causing Harry to jump then look up at me, my lips curled, holding back my tears, knowing i’d do anything for that kid.

“This is from Uncle Sirius and I,” Remus moved beside Harry, wrapped his arms around the kid, I stopped the snowglobe, watches the figures freeze then placing it gently back in the box.

“Oh you did not,” Lily bursted out laughing as Sirius bent down, placing the long box on Harry's lap.

“OH we totally did,” Sirius smirked, helping Harry unwrap the gift, a small, toddler sized broom was unwrapped.

“Bloody hell, my kids gonna be a star, we have to go try it out!” James jumped from the couch but Lily pulled him down.

“After darling,” Lily whispered, causing me to smile, I looked at her then down at the broom, Harry held it in his little wee hands as Sirius explained everything to him.

“We did good you know,” Remus whispered leaning his head on mine. “I love the snow globe, it’s perfect,”

I stayed silent for a moment, admiring Sirius, and everyone else in the room. “Yeah, we did really good,”

#marauders fanfiction #the marauders #hp marauders #Maraudersera #young marauders #SiriusBlack #RemusLupin #LilyEvans #JamesPotter #HarryPotter

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twoidiotwriters1 · 4 years

Text

Starcrossed Losers XV (Josh Wheeler xReader)

A/N: My eyes hurt from editing this thing so late at night, please enjoy

Words: 4,700

Warnings: None!

Previous chapter // Next chapter

What’s up, I’m officially fucked.

I don’t know how to narrate everything as it went down, I don’t have superpowers and I didn’t see it from above, also I was too busy trying to not self combust while Josh was kissing me.

I’m stupid. You knew that don’t pretend this came as a surprise, I’m dumb. I gave up my last braincell for my overalls, I have nothing left.

That’s not important right now, I’ll go back to tell you the story, just be warned: Things don’t get prettier.

So Josh just kissed me, I’m standing there avoiding physical contact until a voice inside my head (one that sounds a lot like Wesley) screams to me: MAKE YOUR MOVE!

I pull him down by the collar of his shirt and close my eyes tightly, kissing him back. All I can think right now is “Please, don’t regret this after it’s over” and I mean it for both of us.

The problem is that I suffer a little bit of post-traumatic stress, so when He kissed my mind went: ‘Oh fuck he just did the same thing that Alex did, what if he doesn’t feel good after, what about me? How am I feeling?’

The answer is: I’m terrified. I feel so many things, great things, beautiful things, but I’m scared shitless.

After he steps back, eyeing me up like he’s waiting for a reaction.

I’m trying to collect myself. I’m panicking, What the fuck did just happened?

“Shit,” It’s the first thing that Josh says.

I keep my eyes closed, I feel that I will start crying if I look at him. It won’t be a sad cry, it’s more like I’m so scared of what I’m feeling right now I regret every decision I’ve ever taken. I don’t wanna hurt Josh by saying something I don’t mean just cause I’m scared, my whole body is shaking and I’m so cold that I’m not even blushing, I can’t move.

“Y/N?” Josh takes another step back, I hear him a bit further away than before, “Are you... are you okay?”

I take a deep breath, I have to be brave. I slowly open my eyes but keep them fixed on the ground where Josh is standing, all I can see it’s his shoes.

“I’m fine,” I rasp, “... I could use a moment to calm down”

“I blew it,” Josh’s feet move, walking in circles, “Y/N I’m sorry, I’m so sorry please don’t get mad, I did it without thinking. I mean I was thinking but fuck I just wanted to kiss you, I-”

“Josh,” I speak up, closing my eyes again and holding the bridge of my nose, ‘Please don’t say you regret it. Don’t say you don’t have feelings for me’, “you don’t get it”

His footsteps come into a halt.

“Then explain it to me,” He says softly.

“I-”

“Y/N! Josh!” I look up and I meet Angelica’s glare, “Don’t fucking disappear like that!”

“Sorry, An,” I apologize, walking over to her and putting a hand on her shoulder for comfort, “we’re making sure the limits of the mall are safe again, you know, from bombs or something”

“They didn’t put things, they took them,” She says, fuming, “you need to come back inside right now”

“Okay,” I frown.

“We’re right behind you,” Josh is standing next to me. I feel a shiver run down my spine.

Angelica nods and goes back to the mall without even noticing how stiff Josh and I look. I turn to him, still not able to look at him in the eyes.

“I’m not upset... many things happened tonight and I think we should take care of that first. Don’t you?”

“Totally, I agree” Josh replies, I know he’s lying.

“Let’s go back,” I mumble, walking away.

Okay, then Josh likes me and I like him back. Why am I scared?

I’m scared cause this takes my freedom away, if I take it all in that means I’ll stay with Josh, cause I like him. There are things that I’ll never be able to change, if I start something with Josh I’ll do everything to make him happy. Everything.

My loyalty scares me.

I have to learn how to control that part of me, to not give myself away so easily. What if he tries and fails to be a better man? I’ll be in love with an asshole, I’ll be blind to his acts.

Or... maybe I won’t.

Josh doesn’t try to follow me when we enter the mall, he goes to the mattress store and says something about changing his clothes. I do the same.

I feel safe with my overalls back on, instead of my lime-green skates I put on the baby-blue sneakers, and since it’s still late and I’m freezing I look around for a jacket, I find a black hoodie. I think it’s a man’s hoodie since it reaches my butt and the sleeves are gigantic. It makes me feel safe though, so I keep it.

My hair feels odd so I tie it and then make my way back to the main hall. Most of the kids are there, picking up some things and sharing sad looks of weariness.

“Y/N?” I look to my left, a girl that I think it’s Leila approaches me, she has a deep cut above her eyebrow, “Can you help me?”

“Sure,” I give her a small smile, “let me find Alex and I’ll meet you back in the pharmacy, okay?”

She nods and walks away, I feel a different kind of fear as I watch her go. These kids are sort of our responsibility now, all of them. They almost died because of some stupid beef Turbo has with Wesley and Josh, that’s not right.

Did we save these kids, or did we just turn them into Turbo’s next target?

I find Alex already in the pharmacy, he’s curing kids, still wearing his suit. When he notices me I see relief in his eyes, maybe he thought that I had been taken. Either way, I’m here and ready to help.

Leila appears soon after, I ask her to sit on the bench in front of me and I start to clean her cut.

“Are you alright, Al?” I ask while looking for bandaids.

“I could ask you the same thing,” He replies, finishing up with a kid and waiting for the next to sit, “How’s your hand?”

“Not that bad,” I’m honest this time, it’s not hurting as much as the side of my head Maya so kindly stepped on, “I didn’t get to use it much”

“I’m fine,” Ales shrugs, “a few bruises but nothing I can’t handle.”

“You should change, we’ll be here for a while,” I tilt my head, watching as most of the kids form a line, all to get their wounds treated.

“I’m not uncomfortable”

“You’ll be, eventually,” I give him a severe look, “c’mon, I can handle this on my own for a while, the kids won’t go anywhere... I won’t go anywhere”

“...Okay,” He sighs, nodding towards the boy in front of him to let him know he’s done curing his cuts, “I’ll be back soon”

“Sweet,” I respond without paying much attention.

The line moves slowly as I clean and take care of cuts, bruises, and even a few broken fingers. Those were tricky, luckily Alex came back and used his boy scout skills to make several splints. That took us most of the night. Once we were done I saw Alex’s intentions of asking me if I had taken a decision so I escaped with the excuse of counting our supplies things that were lost. I did the same with the people.

I finished the list and handed it to Angelica.

The final result was this:

They took our food and water, along with Jayden, girl Jaden, Gabriel, Zoey, Carly, other gay Josh, and Jayden. Angelica said she would go tell Josh so I decided to go over to where Eli and Wesley are and have a chat with them before things get uglier.

“I don’t think you understand exactly how much you just fucked our group,” I say as soon as I get to them.

“No no, I don’t think you understand how fucking dumb locking us up is,” Eli retorts, “We were just trying to protect the kids”

“By killing a guy?” I scoff, “That’s not fair to Josh”

“Who cares?” He asks, “Josh never did shit for us, did he? I had the mall first! He didn’t find them a home, he just took it from me”

“You’re still not over that?” I roll my eyes, “You almost kill Josh over the stupid mall? Seriously?”

“No. I almost kill Josh because that was the right thing to do, considering that Turbo has the strong, fully armed tribe”

“You have no morals. Who cares if Turbo had all that? He still lost, you know. We wouldn’t have had to fight if Wesley had spoken earlier,” I look over at Wesley, who is deadly quiet, “Josh would’ve understood. He would’ve helped you find a solution.”

“Josh being nice to you doesn’t mean he’s like that with everybody,” He replies indifferent, “maybe he would’ve tried to help me, but this wasn’t his problem, it was mine”

“When Sam was missing it was only Josh’s problem and you helped him find her”

Wesley shifts uncomfortably in his place, not looking at me.

“Y/N, You don’t get it.”

“You’re right, I don’t,” I say harshly, “I thought you had changed, Wesley. I was wrong, you’re still backing up the wrong people. And Eli,” I look at the boy, sincere hurt spreading on my chest, “I voted for you, you know? I never forgot it was you who got the mall first, I was thankful for that”

Eli avoids my stare, he maintains his attitude of not giving a shit, but I notice that his fists are tightly closed.

Angelica’s voice gets closer and I turn around to see her with Josh beside her. He looks terrible, I just hope is not my fault.

“Don’t blame us,” Eli interrupts their chat, “we tried murdelizing Josh so this wouldn’t happen”

“That’s a confession,” Says the girl that I think it’s Jessica.

“I didn’t say blit,” Eli frowns.

“You said you tried to kill Josh,” Angelica adds.

“Not what I said”

“It is”

“The you misheard me”

“I recorded it”

As they argue I keep my eyes fixed on them until Josh’s stare is impossible to ignore. I turn to him with my voice caught in my throat, unable to say anything, a joke, or a comforting phrase. Josh is frowning but is more a worried frown than an angry one.

He probably has a lot in his head right now, disappointed that things aren’t going how he wanted. Well Wheeler, that’s another thing we have in common.

“If you’re looking for bad hombres then look around,” Eli’s voice brings me back and makes me look away from Josh, “these kids are here illegally. They didn’t come through an authorized port of entry. They didn’t apply for asylum. This is an invasion”

“You are so not helping yourself right now,” I reply, stepping closer to him as Josh steps away to see Wesley, “these kids could save your ass from being kicked out”

“You can’t kick me out of MY mall!” He defends.

“The mall is not yours only!” I exclaim, “We all deserve to be here!”

“You didn’t put all the safety traps, I did. You didn’t make sure everything was still working when the nuke dropped. I did,” He leans closer, “I have the right to stay”

What upsets me the most is that he has a point, we kind of invade his place. Although it’s big enough for all of us and he should be less whiny about it, he did make all the hard work for us.

“I trusted you,” Josh speaks behind me, “we were friends”

“You know how you’d do anything for Sam Dean or Y/N?” Wesley asks, “I get that”

I try to ignore the fact that he added me into the question like I’m on the same level as Sam, like Josh is that interested in me. Right now it causes me nothing but distress.

“It’s just,” He continues, “you don’t know Turbo the way I do”

“What else have you lied to me about?” Josh asks bitterly.

Something weird happens, it’s brief but I notice. Wesley looks at Angelica and I see her flinch, she steps in to interrupt them.

They’re hiding something.

“We should make sure Triumph is still locked up,” She says, “I’ll go check”

“Alright,” Josh mumbles.

“You can’t go alone,” I interrupt, “I’ll go with you”

“No, we need you here,” She shakes her head, then leaves without waiting for a response.

“Who?” I ask in confusion.

“What are we gonna do about them?” Asks Jessica.

“Why are you asking this dope?” Eli sneers, “Josh is such a wuss, his cock dropped off, hitchhiked to San Diego and is now getting his realtor’s license, all just to get away from Josh”

“Sometimes I wonder how were you so smart to put all those traps when all that comes from your mouth is so disgustingly stupid,” I say tiredly.

Josh gives him one exasperated look before turning back to Jessica.

“Why are you asking me?”

“I was asking to the both of you,” Jessica says, now looking at me as well, “we trust you”

Josh and I share the same startled look, he’s the first one to react.

“I don’t know what to do about these assholes,” He half-laughs, “look I’m not a judge or a lawyer. I’m just a kid, same as Turbo except... Turbo’s a spoiled brat who throws temper tantrums.”

“I still can’t believe he did all of this just cause he had a jealous fit,” I cross my arms, “he hurt innocent kids cause he thought Wesley was cheating, what kind of sick idiot does that?”

“He is never gonna leave me or us alone,” He looks back at me, “I don’t know if you saw her, but Maya was with him too. She’ll do anything to get back at you”

“I know,” I nod, feeling my mouth dry, “she tried to kill me last night, if it wasn’t for Alex...”

“I know,” Now he’s the one avoiding my eyes, “I don’t know how, but we need to take him out for good”

“Tyler told me Turbo got hurt by one of his weapons,” I reply, “that means we are not the only ones trying to get rid of him”

“What are you suggesting?” Jessica asks.

“I... I don’t know,” I’m frustrated with all these roads that take us nowhere, “we could look for a way to reach the right person, talk to them and convinced them to help... I just don’t know how or who”

“What about Wesley and Eli?”

“I think...” I look over my shoulder to see my former friends.

I know I don’t have the courage to kick them out, not after Wesley got the medicines I needed to cure Josh and Eli’s right about how he arrived at the mall first.

“I think we have enough problems, better to lock them here instead of kicking them out. Keep your enemies close, right?”

I hear a few whispers of agreement and I feel a wave of relief washing over me. One less thing to worry about.

“Jessica, could you stay and keep an eye on them?” I ask, “I’ll send Alex your way in a moment with food for them and more indications”

“Okay,” She nods, sitting in front of the store.

The rest of the kids scatter and I’m left with Josh, who is back with the intense stare. I feel calm enough to talk now. I’m still afraid, but it’s better if I also fix this once and for all.

“Can we talk?” I turn to him suddenly, making him jump.

“Yes,” He replies, quickly taking my good hand and walking to where the storage elevator is.

Once we’re there he lets go of my hand and stands as far as he can, I get the message that he thinks that I’m mad, or maybe he’s the one who’s mad.

“Listen I-”

“I don’t want-”

We speak at the same time and we stop, waiting for the other to start again, then I nod to him so he can speak first. Josh takes a deep breath.

“I shouldn’t have kissed you without asking first,” He says, “I let my emotions take over me again and before I knew it I was kissing you. I’ll understand if you want to stay away from me for a while, or if you want to go somewhere else with Alex.”

He’s not looking at me and his arms are crossed. He’s defensive because he thinks I’ll reject him.

I don’t know if I’m going to reject him.

“Things are complicated,” I nod, “not only between us, is complicated outside too. Turbo wants your head and Maya wants mine, they’re working together against us. If you really think about it the kiss is the least of our problems”

I try to make him laugh but I fail miserably. Josh is really upset about this whole incident.

“It’s the only thing that I really care about,” He replies, “Y/N when I met you things were different and we wanted different things, we didn’t mean to stay. Things happened and we started talking and... maybe I changed my mind”

“What do you mean?” I say, though I definitely know the answer.

“I like you,” He looks up, “really like you. I like being around you, I feel like I have someone that gets me and I get you. Things just seem... easy”

I feel weird, I could hug him forever but also I’m about to have a breakdown.

“How long have you felt this way?” I say with a shaky breath.

“Long enough to know is real,” Josh shrugs, “I was going to ask you to the dance and all... but Alex did it first.”

Before I can reply, Josh starts rambling.

“I don’t know why I’m telling you this when I know you don’t like me, it’s stupid. Alex is here now and all I’m doing is making you uncomfortable. You were being a good friend and I was stupid enough to think that maybe there was something going on between us-”

“You’re right,” I interrupt him, “I mean, you’re wrong about me not liking you. You’re right about the something between us.”

“What?” His arms fall to his sides.

“I have a massive crush on you, Josh.”

Saying it outside my head is weird, this is the first time I’ve ever confessed directly to a boy. It took me a while but I’m doing it... now what?

“You do?” He frowns.

“I was already into you when you recovered from your severed finger,” I chuckle nervously, “and I chose that stupid song for the soundtrack of our lives cause it made me think of us”

“It did?” Josh’s brain has short-circuited, considering he’s only capable of saying two words every time he opens his mouth.

“It’s cheesy” I shrug, “I thought that you’d understand what I was trying to say but I guess I was being too cryptid. Who could’ve guessed that anyway? I was just being dramatic. My head is too full of fanfic crap”

“I...” Josh struggles to find words, I’ve noticed that happens when he’s under a lot of stress, “wait, give me a minute”

“Alright,” I move closer, “don’t pass out right now, we’re in the middle of something here”

“Yeah, I know sorry” He bends over to support his hands on his knees, “I’m just trying to understand how am I such an idiot”

“I was oblivious too,” I add, trying to calm him down.

“I thought you and Alex were dating now”

“But I told you we were just friends,” I giggle.

I’m obviously so nervous that I’m about to pee my overalls.

...That’s something I never thought I would say.

“You went to the dance with him and got matching outfits. Who does that?” He inquires, “I thought that maybe after everything that happened you decided to give him a second chance"

“Holy shit,” I gasp, “Alex and I love being dramatic, the matching outfits is something common between us... this is our second chance, Josh. Alex and I are giving our friendship a second chance”

“So... you’re not dating him?”

“I am not”

“But when I kissed you...”

I know it’s the worst time to think about the soundtrack of my life, but at the back of my head, I keep hearing the chorus of this one, product of our bizarre conversation.

“I kissed you back,” I admit, suddenly our mutual anxiety makes this conversation easier, “you know how I feel about being tied to someplace, or someone, if I’m being honest I got scared, I felt all these things and I don’t know how to deal with them. Worse yet, I didn’t know how you would react after. Alex told me he knew he didn’t like me after he kissed me, you did the same thing so I was afraid because...”

“I know I'll stay, I know I'll stay Right there with you...”

“That I would realize I’m not into you?” I look away, he steps closer and then his fingertips touch my skin, “Y/N, when I kissed you I felt a lot of things. All of them were positive.”

“That’s good to hear,” I reply in a high-pitched voice.

“You’re still scared about what could happen if we... you know, if we start something?” Josh asks me, I feel his hand moving from my wrist to my shoulder.

“If I don't know The wind will carry me So just hold tight”

“I don’t know,” I look down to his lips and then back up at his eyes.

“Okay, here’s a thought,” He says lowly, “What if we just don’t think about it? What if we just... do it”

I have few seconds to respond to that, I use them hurriedly, forcing something out of my mouth.

“It sounds difficult,” I feel my heart thumping against my ribcage, “but I’m kind of tired of boys stealing kisses from me and never coming back”

“It’s your choice,” His breathing is slow, his hand is softly touching my cheek, moving little hairs away from my face “whatever you want, I’ll follow”

We hear rushed steps towards us and I jump back. I was supposed to send Alex to Jessica.

“Fuck, I have to send Alex with Jessica,” I pass a hand over my face, trying to get rid of the fuzzy feeling in my brain.

Angelica and Crumble appear, they’re on their way to see Triumph.

“Hi losers,” Angelica watches us carefully, “were you making out in here?”

“Get out of here,” Josh huffs, I can see him blushing.

“I was just asking,” Angelica rolls her eyes, “see ya in a bit, Crumble is coming with me”

“Be careful,” I reply.

They walk out and Josh and I share a look. The moment is hella ruined, yet there’s this buzzing feeling around us, one that the experts would call: Sexual Tension.

“We should go back,” I mumble, pointing over my shoulder with my thumb.

“Yeah,” Josh sighs, then he walks past me and smiles briefly.

I smile back.

I don’t know what’s going on inside my body but sure is something big, I don’t even feel like I have organs in there anymore. More like a mush of melted butterflies... that does not sound nice at all. I’m so sorry. I was trying to explain with other words that I’m freaking out.

Not relevant! The point is... I think Josh and I are almost a... couple?

I won’t put a label on it yet, I’ll just wait and see what happens from here.

And what happens from here will surprise you! Click on the next page to find out.

...

Bad joke? I’m sorry, I do awful jokes when I’m nervous.

I go over to Alex and tell him he needs to stay and watch over Wesley and Eli while we find a way to fix this. My indications come with a list of four kids that will take turns with him so they can take long breaks. It has my signature at the bottom, so they know he’s not making things up. Then he asks me about Josh.

“I talked to him but I don’t actually know if something will happen between us”

“But?” He smiles, “C’mon! I know that face, something happened”

“He kissed me last night,” I cut him off before he starts screaming, “We aren’t together! I think we’re not. It’s complicated.”

“You will be,” He smirks, “it’s just a matter of time, I can see it. There’s no way he won’t fall in love with you”

“Shut up, nerd.”

“Fair enough,” He shrugs, “mark my words though”

“Go with Jessica.”

“Fine. See ya,” Alex looks over my shoulder and his smile grows, “enjoy your date”

“My what?” I frown, turning around I see Josh walking up to me. I roll my eyes, “Alex for fuck’s sake...”

He’s gone now, so he doesn’t hear me. Josh stops in front of me and puts his skateboard on the table on my right.

“Is it broken?” I ask, leaning closer to examine it.

Josh shakes his head.

“I’m just restoring a few parts”

“How long have you had it?”

“Since the nuke, about... Seven months?”

“I see,” I settle with just standing there next to him. It’s enough, I don’t even feel awkward about it.

I should though, I’m staring at him like a creep. Luckily he doesn’t seem to mind and starts to make small talk. We chat casually and act like nothing’s changed.

My brain doesn’t agree with us since its screaming “KISS HIM! KISS HIM! I LOVE HIS FACE!”

It’s embarrassing and I’m glad he can’t read minds.

You can read mine though, so uh, I’m sorry for that.

KJ appears beside us, I see her struggle with something and I’m about to ask what’s wrong when she speaks. In English.

“You’re right. Turbo needs to go.”

I look at her with wide eyes, Josh looks up, slowly realizing who is talking to him.

“And now it’s the perfect time to do it. When he’s injured, hit by an arrow during the battle,” She speaks quickly, like she doesn’t want the rest of the kids to hear her, “Unfortunately, these mall kids are pure priss. They’re not even the kids who got picked last kickball. No, these are the kids who had a doctor’s note to get out of gym because they’re allergic to dander”

Josh takes a second to process what’s happening, then he asks:

“You speak English?”

“We are in America,” KJ replies matter of factly.

“English?” He replies, raising his voice.

“Josh!” I exclaim, looking around.

“You knew this?” He looks over at me, utterly confused.

“Yes?” I say nervously, “She didn’t want anyone to know so I kept it a secret...”

“That was nice of you,” KJ smiles politely, then looks back at Josh, “we all do what we need to survive. Suburban whities ignore anyone who doesn’t look and sound like you. People say anything around me because they think I don’t understand shit and that nets me information”

“That’s better than hiding in giant trash containers,” I agree.

“What?” Josh looks over at me.

“That’s how I used to spy on people.”

“Intel is the only currency that anyone can trade on,” KJ continues, ignoring my comment, “You wanna take out Turbo? You need a tribe with skills”

Josh stares at her for a few seconds.

“English?” He asks again, loudly.

KJ sighs heavily and rolls her eyes. I grab him by the arm and pull him with me, then I put my other hand on KJ’s shoulder and take them to a more private area.

“This will take a while...”

Taglist.

@letsbloodmagic @slythermyg @loving-u-3000

#twoidiots writing #daybreak fanfic #eli cardashyan #daybreak #josh wheeler xreader #josh wheeler #ms crumble #kj karen jane #wesley fists #angelica green

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spn-fic-promts · 4 years

Text

Like a girl (5 times Dean felt like a girl + 1 time Sam praised him for it)

TW: Rape/non-con, bullying, depression, self hatred and self harm.

Dean WInchester has always had problems with his body. As with most of his problems they all started when he was 4 and his mom died. Dean had to raise his baby brother with very little help from his father. His father who could hardly look at him. And all because Dean looked too much like a girl. Too much like his mom.

The kids at school commented on it as well. Mostly the other boys making fun of him. He always made better friends with the girls. They loved how long his eyelashes are or how pretty his eyes and freckles were. Meanwhile the boys would call him a girl and tell him he couldn’t do things. When he got older that turned into making him use the girls bathrooms and locker rooms. Or calling him names and saying he was gay.

And at home he had to act like a girl. Well a mom at least. He knew he had to take care of Sammy no matter what. Whether Sam realized it or not. If that meant feeding Sammy and not himself, Dean stayed skinny. If that meant buying Sammy new clothes and not himself, Dean wore Sams hand-me-downs. If that meant keeping johns drunken attention on him and not Sammy, Dean covered the bruises as best he could. If dad needed help on dangerous hunts, Dean was there not Sam. Never Sam.

He had to be the big brother, the dad, and the mom.

Like a girl.

------------------------

When he was 14 his father came home one day drunk. Dean had just finished putting Sammy to bed and was doing the dishes. His father came home to see him acting like a stay at home mom and mistook him for his dead wife. John stumbled over to Dean and wrapped his arms around his waist. His hands nearly connecting over Deans belly.

“Whatta ya doin’ babe?” John slurred in Deans ear.

Dean froze, “I’m doing the dishes dad. Are you ok?”

“Oohho yeah baby I’m fine. Especially now I get to play daddy again. Huh” John roughly turned Dean around in his arms and shoved his head into Deans neck.

“Ah! Dad!! Your drunk. You need to go to bed!” Dean gasped as his father sucked on his neck.

“Mhm yeah lets get to bed sweatheart.” John scooped Dean up bridal style as if he weighed nothing, and started stomping towards the bedroom of the motel.

“No, no! Dad Sammy’s in here. You can’t!” Dean wriggled in Johns grasp.

John actually stopped and looked as if he was contemplating something. He turned around and started back. Dean let out a sigh of relief. Then John spoke up about what was on his mind. “It’s a good thing I got a room with a seperate room with a couch.

“No!” He screamed.

Like a girl

---------------------

In the morning John didn’t remember anything. Dean remembered it all. That week John left for another hunt and didn’t leave enough money. Sam needed new textbooks for 6th grade (after skipping 5th.) He was already bigger than Dean and would need more clothes. And Dean still had to feed him.

So Dean decided to use his femininity to his advantage. After Sammy would go to sleep Dean would lock all the doors and go to the nearest gas station in the skimpiest clothes he could find.

Like a girl.

----------------------

Dean dropped out of school in 10th grade. While Sam skipped another year in 7th grade. Jumping straight to highschool at 12. It was hard to keep Sam in school while they moved around for hunts. But Dean made sure he went as much as possible. And taught him as much as he could on his own.

Dean had to go away on hunts more and more with their father. Leaving Sammy to fend for himself. Dean got in more and more trouble by leaving Sam extra money. He was constantly getting hurt by the monsters and told to man up.

Even the monsters commented on how girly he looked. So he decided to start trying to be more boyish. Taking girls out, working out more, being more reckless, and acting more ‘manly.’

Sammy eventually graduated and went away to Stanford. Dean was happy for him but was convinced that his brother simply didn’t want to be around him anymore. And Dean couldn’t blame him. He didn’t want to be around himself either. This was the point when Dean hit rock bottom. He started carving words into his thighs. Words like pretty, and girl. He cried in the bathroom while bleeding from between his legs.

Like a girl.

--------------------------

The first time Sam kissed him Dean panicked. They were in a motel in Texas on a hunt. Sam was currently soulless. And Dean was taking advantage of him. Yeah. Dean was taking advantage of the big, strong, muscly, man that he lived with.

Like a girl.

------------------------

“Dean” Sam called for his brother through the bunker.

“Yeah Sammy I’m just getting out of the shower!” Dean called back. Sam started his way to ambush Dean in the bathroom.

Yeah Sam was sorta horny for his big brother. And he knew Dean felt the same way. They had kissed and made out a lot since the first time when he was soulless. Sam also knew he had forced himself on Dean. Luckily Dean had run away before Sam could do more.

But since then their relationship had progressed. They held hands while not in public. Hugged while relaxing (”It’s called cuddling Dean.” “Not with me it’s not”) They made out a lot. But Dean wouldn’t let Sam get any further than that.

Sam knew about Deans self esteem problems. He knew that’s why Dean acted all macho like he did. Sam hated that. Hated that Dean covered himself up like that. Forced himself to be something Sam knew he wasn’t. Sam just wanted him to be himself. Just wanted his brother.

So Sam didn’t know exactly what sort of messed up blame he put on himself that’s making him not want Sam to have sex with him but Sam plans on fixing it tonight.

Sam quietly crept into the bathroom Dean was in. His brother was looking in the mirror and holding a towel around his hips. Sam crept up behind him and snuck his arms around Deans waiste. Still so small but with rock solid abs.

“S-Sammy? What are ya doin’?” Dean whispered as Sam inhaled his body wash.

“Just admiring my beautiful big brother. I wish I knew why you won’t let me touch you Dean. It’s all I can do to hold myself back.” Sam purred in Deans ear.

“No Sam you don’t want that. You don’t want that at all.” Dean grimaced at himself in the mirror.

“Why not Dean. Why would anyone not want you? Perfect. You so perfect Dean. So much smaller than me but still so strong. I love it Dean. I love your body. And anyone in their right mind would to if they saw it.” Sam met Deans eyes in the mirror.

Dean held his gaze and whispered “are you calling me crazy?”

Sam withdrawed his hands, shocked. “What- Dean-But-You-How?-Why?”

“Very articulate little brother.” Dean chuckled. Then he turned in Sams loosened hold and sighed. “If we’re really gonna do this then theirs some things I need to tell you.”

“Yeah Dean whatever you want. I’m listening.” Sam complied as Dean sat on the edge of a bathtub. Sam following suit.

“Remember when we were little and dad would always say I looked like mom?” Dean explained everything that had ever happened to him because of his looks. Explained what their dad did, the kids at school, men on the streets who paid him to do things he didn’t want to. He told him he’d been depressed after he left. That he had contemplates suicide. But he left out the words on his legs. Figuring Sam would see them for himself.

“Oh my god. Dean I’m so sorry.” Sam has pulled Dean into his lap. Held him tightly while they both cried.

“It’s not your fault. It was never your fault. Any of it.” Dean whispered.

“But I could have stopped so much of it if I’d just payed more attention. If I’d jumped out of my own little world for just one minute I could have prevented some of your suffering.” Sam sobbed into Deans shoulder.

“That wasn’t your responsibility-“

“And it wasn’t yours to sell your body to keep me fed!” Sam inturupts him. “Dean I used to beg you for more stuff. And you always got them for me. And I never realized that you were starving yourself to get them! I didn’t even need half the things I asked for! I was just being selfish!”

“It’s ok Sammy. Shh it’s ok.” Dean rubs gentle circles into Sams head while he holds him.

“I should be comforting you.” Sam states wettly.

“It’s ok. Hey hey look at me.” Dean pulls Sams face out of his neck. “I don’t know if you still want to but if you do. We can have sex now. I understand if after what I told you you’d be dis-“

“Of course I still want to Dean! God is that why you were hiding. You thought I’d be turned off by what you’ve been through. Dean I meant what I said earlier. Your beautiful! And perfect! And everything I’ve ever wanted. I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to realize it.” Sam stands up abruptly, causing Dean to wrap his legs around Sams waiste. “I wish I could have taken your virginity before dad did.” Sam says between kisses.

“Oh my god! Sam! Don’t say that!” Dean laughs.

“Why not?”

“1 ew don’t mention dad. 2 you were ten!” Dean says matter of factly.

“So? I was a horny ten year old. And I was already bigger than you.” He chuckles and Dean smacks him on the side of the head.

They get to the bedroom and Sam literally throws Dean on the bed. Dean bounces a few times as his towel starts to slip from his hips.

Sam makes a move to pull it the rest of the way off but Dean stops him. “Nuh uh. You first big guy. I don’t know if you’ve realized but I’m practically naked and your still fully clothed.”

Sam hastily rips off his clothes and throws them around the room while dean sits back to admire the view.

“Better?” Sam smirks cockily.

“Much.” Dean holds out his arms for Sam to fall into.

“Your.” Kiss to the jaw. “So.” Kiss to the neck. “Fucking.” One to each nipple. “Pretty.” One to the belly button.

Dean freezes on the last word. “What’s the matter?” Sam looks up at Dean worriedly.

“See for yourself.” Dean pulls the towel off himself and spreads his legs. Sam instinctively slots himself between them before kissing the tip of Deans cock.

“Dean are these?”

“Yeah.”

“Your not a girl. Your the most fucking perfect guy I’ve ever met.” Sam kisses the word.

“Your not my mom. Your my big brother. Your my whole world.” Sam kisses the word mom next.

“Your not a slut. Your the most selfless person I’ve ever met. And you have the most attractive body I’ve ever seen.” Sam kisses that word.

“And your not just pretty. Your beautiful. And I’ll never stop telling you just how beautiful and pressious you are.” Sam holds up Deans leg. The muscle twitching in his palm. And kisses the word.

When Sam crawls back up to see Deans face, he finds his brother covering his mouth behind his palm. Silent tears spilling from love filled eyes.

“I love you so much Dean. More than anything.” Sam whispers as he finally kisses Deans perfect, plump lips.

“I love you to Sammy.”

#sam winchester #dean winchester #dean winchester x sam winchester #angst #dean angst #spnfamily #spn

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freecollectorblizzard14 · 6 years

Text

Vol-Tron?

One year of being in space and fighting aliens. "When I say Vol, you say Tron. Vol," Lance said trying to get Keith to say it right, "Tr-" "Tron?" Keith said very confused. "You for it, Mullet," Lance says before doing something no one thought he would do. He hugged Keith. When the hug ended, Lance did something no one ever thought would happen to do with Keith. Lance kissed Keith on the lips. Keith and Lance both blushed deeply, then look away. Not sure what do to next. Little did they know that they are being watched. Watched by Pidge, Shiro, Hunk, Allura, and Coran from the distance, to be exact. "Finally," Pidge exclaimed. She was so happy that they are starting to figure out their feelings. "I was starting to wonder how long it was going to figure it out," Hunk said looking at the two blushing palidians. "Shiro, you owe me twenty dollars. You said that they would get together next year," Allura said with her hand sticking out, waiting for the money to be handed over. "Hold on, they only kissed and have to figure out what to do now. So, I don't owe you anything, yet," Shiro said looking away from the blushing couple. He really don't care if he lost his money, on his brother's happyness. "The human ways of romance is weird," Allura exclaimed looking at the rest of the palidians and Coran now. "How do the Alteanians do romance?" Pidge questioned wondering what was life like on Altea. "A bunch of suitors and marriage offers. Or that could just be me as a princess," Allura says calmly looking around at her palidians. "So like the older days on earth," Hunk says as statement rather than a quetion. "Oh, come on let's talk about this later and watch the Klance ship sail at this moment," Shiro said wanting to know what was wanting to know what was happening with his brother and possible future boyfriend. When they looked back they were leaving to go train. "I will go ask Keith about his feelings for Lance. Hunk, you and Pidge go bug Lance till he tells you about his feelings for Keith. Don't stop till he tells you," Shiro said trying to push them off after Lance to find the answers about what is going on with those two, or what was going to happen in the future. "We have to make sure that they are alone when we talk to them about. So wait in till they finish training," Coran said knowing that they both train for along time. Coran left to fix something else on the ship. "So after we eat?" Pidge questioned looking at Shiro and Allura for answers. "Till then, we shall leave them alone. Maybe by then they will figure out how they feel," said Allura said like a loving Space Mom that she is. She may not admit it to the others, but they have become like her's and Shiro's children. Like a parent, she doesn't pick favorites. But if she did, it would end up Lance and Keith. Even if she was hard on him for being half Galra, which was something that he couldn't control. After a long few weeks of fighting against Zarkon, they finally got a chance to talk to the pair. "Hey, Lance. What is going on with you and Keith? You two haven't been fighting for a few weeks now, not that we mind this new way of how you two act around each other. We just need to know why the change," Hunk said looking at his friend wondering if they finally got together. "Okay, you got me. Keith and I are dating. The fighting stopped when I confessed that I have feelings for Keith. Then he needed time to think so, I gave it to him," Lance said with dreamingly eyes. As he recalled the moment. It still felt like a dream. But he knew that is really happening. Just like how he thought that he was dreaming when he saw Keith again, and when they went into space. "My ship has sailed," Pidge exclaimed with glee. She was happy that Lance has found someone that makes him happy. He is as much as of a brother as Matt, her real brother. "But, you can't tell anyone else. Got it? Netheir Keith or I are fully out of the closet. I told my family that I am bisexual, and now you two know as well. Keith figure it out, kind of after I told him. He was confused if I was gay, bi, or something else. Anyway, Keith never had a family to come out to. He had Shiro, but I am guessing Shiro knows that he is gay. He needs to have someone to support him, and that is me, the supportive boyfriend that I can be for him," Man e said lovingly sincerely. "Okay we got it. We won't tell anyone," Hunk said knowing that at that moment that Keith was talking to Shiro about Lance. "We have to go train, right Hunk?" Pidge lies knowing that they had to talk to Shiro about what each group learned. "He, and I swear that we won't tell anyone," Hunk said as he pulled Pidge away from Lance, so that could go find Shiro. Meanwhile Shiro was about to ask Keith about Lance. "So, you and Lance?" Shiro asks knowing that his little brother was in love with the other boy. He happy with the boy, who just might be his love of his life. They could over time get married, hopefully the war will be over by then. "What about us?" Keith said trying to figure out what his big brother is talking about. "Did you finally ask him out?" Shiro said looking extremely interested in his love life. "Yep, we are dating. So what, is that all you wanted to talk about?" Keith said knowing what his brother was going to say next. "Yes, be safe and use protection," Shiro said turning into the Space Dad that he is. "We haven't. Were not that far. We just started dating," Keith said. "And I don't want to have this conversation with you." With that Keith ran away to, what Shiro would guess would be, Lance's room. Keith barged into Lance's room. Lance imbraced his boyfriend. "Okay, they seemed to have figured us out, Lance. Before I was ready to tell the others," Keith wines as he snuggled deeper into Lance's chest. "It will be okay, I know it will," Lance said before kissing the top of Keith's head. "I hope that you are right," Keith said knowing that he is likely right about this sort of thing. "When have I ever been wrong?" Lance said, " don't you dare answer that question. Or no cuddles for a month." "Lance, we lost track of time in our first few months of being space. So jokes on you, and you would miss the cuddles, too," Keith said knowing that it's true. "Your right," Lance mutters into Keith's hair before they fall asleep on the bed like that. Shiro soon realized after Keith ran off, he knew he had to know what the others discovered from Lance. He raced off to find the others. "They are dating but they want us all to know for right now, and Allura here is your money that I owed you from this bet," Shiro said not caring as long as his little brother is happy. "Let me guess, you went all Space Was on Keith, and he ran away from you," Allura exclaimed knowing that very well that he did that. "Your no better Space Mom," Pidge exclaimed knowing that she could go all Space Mom, she had personally felt her mom-ness. "Neither are you, my Space Daughter," Allura exclaimed before she started to laugh at what is going on with them. "Well, we should check Klance. Let's go find them," Hunk countered knowing that the others would agree. When they walked into Lance's room, after checking the training room and Keith's room, Keitb snuggles deeper into Lance's chest, and Lance pulled him closer to himself. Everyone took pictures with the phones that Pidge and Hunk made for them. They all sent a copy to the couple's phones, that where on Lances dresser far, from the happy couple. They then decided to leave them to be till morning, knowing that Coran would wonder where the two where. But they couldn't let him know. Someone had to be the one to not know about these two being together. The next morning, Keith wakes up first. "Lance wake up," Keith said as he started to shake Lance awake. "What is it morning already, babe?" Lance asked trying to rub the sleep out of his eyes. "Yep, we should probably tell everyone else. Who did you tell, Lance?" Keith asks a now fully awake Lance. "I more of confirmed Pidge and Hunk's theory. So, I guess I told them. Why? Did you tell anyone?" Lance asked knowing that the only person that Keoth would tell would be Shiro. "Hunk and Pidge ship us, as well as the others, who probably all know by now," Keith said looking down, "and I also only told Shiro. Which was a huge mistake. Since he is our Space Dad, and all." "Wait, did he give you the talk, but the gay edition?" Lance asks knowing that Keith doesn't know the gay edition even existed before now. "He only implied that we are having sex early in our relation ship," Keith said before asking, "wait, there is a gay edition? Why did no one tell me. Before Lance could come up with a flirty comeback, Pidge entered with her hands over her eyes. "Um, Pidgey, what are you doing?" Lance asks wondering how she would know that his boyfriend was in his room. "I didn't know if you and Keith are wearing clothes or not. So, I am not taking any chances. So are you or are you two not wearing clothes?" Pidge said still covering her eyes. "We are wearing our clothes. So what do you want?" Keith asked knowing that she knew that he was sitting on the bed, just know the part about being in Lance's lap till she opened her eyes. Pidge squealed at seeing them so close and affectionate. She squealed louder when Lance kissed the top of Keith's head. Keith blushed deeper that the read on his jacket which was sitting on top of his and Lance's phones that Pidge and Hunk made. Lance's jacket was on top of Keith's, so the didn't notice that they were sent a few messages with the pictures from last night. "So, why are you here Pidge?" Lance asks knowing that it was likely to inform them about a meal or training or they are being attacked. "Oh, right. I came to tell you that it is in fact breakfast time," Pidge said before muttering, "and everyone knows except Coran." Keith understaded what Pidge had said. Keith look Panicked, and Lance was confused what Pidge had said that would make Keith panic. Pidge soon realized that she forgot that was part galra, so his senses are better than to a plain human's. "What was that Pidge?" asked a extremely confused Lance. "I said Hunk wants us all there for breakfast, 'cause he is trying extremely hard to make pancakes. Which is hard since he is using stuff from space rather than from Earth. Which is hard no matter how hard Allura trys to explain what is what or how many translations Coran or Allura give him," Pidge lied then started to laugh because it was truly happening, but it wasn't what she said. She knew Keith unstud what she had said the first time. But she didn't care if he heard her, as long as Lance didn't hear. It was too funny seeing him confused. She knew that Keith would agree with her on that. "Okay, we will be down in a few ticks," Lance said trying to get her to leave so he could ask Keith what she really said. Pidge left knowing that they were going to talk a bit then change before coming to eat. "So, what did she really say?" Lance asked his amazing boyfriend. "They all know about us, except for Coran," Keith said looking at the man who just might be the love of his life, for the rest of his life. "So, how should this go down?" Lance asked knowing Keith probably did have a plan for if this were to happen, like it did. "We can walk in like we don't realize that they are in there, and be affectionate till someone says something. But don't go too far with it or we will be embrassed. Got it?" Keith said knowing that Lance would agree to the plan since he loves being affectionate to him. "Okay, got it. No going to far, or Space Dad might go crazy, got it," Lance said agreeing his love's plan. They got changed and grabbed their jackets. They notice their phone's have messages that they check. "So, Pidge was right. They all know basically about us, and they took pictures of us in our sleep. But you have to admit that they took pictures that show how cute we are together," Lance said as he wrapped his arm around Keith waist then planted a kiss on Keith's cheek. "Shut up, Sharpshooter," Keith said as he just started to blush deeper. "Whatever you say, Samiri" Lance said kissing the top of his head making him blush more. They continued this cuteness till the entered the dinning room, then the kicked it up ten times more cute. Lance planted a kiss on Keith's face after he complimented him. They started using their nicknames for each other. Then to top it off Lance pulled Keith into a kiss on the lips, knowing very well that the others were in the room. When the kiss ended, Lance kissed the top of Keith's head before saying, "I love you, Samiri." "I love you too, Sharpshooter," Keith said before planting a kiss on Lance's cheack. "Oh, we didn't realize that you guys were here yet," Lance lied before looking back at Keith. "Well, morning everyone," Keith said blushing deeper than before. "Did I push it too far?" Lance asked the love of his life. "Just a little bit, but that is fine," Keith said before planting another kiss on Lance's cheack. "So, what is going with you guys?" Lance asked knowing that someone would freak out and scream with the happiness of them getting together. "You two are together?" Coran asked clearly confused about what is going on. "Yep, Keith and I are dating," Lance said lifting up their hands that hadn't let go of the other since they left their room(don't tell Shiro about the room sharing). "About time," Coran screamed. That was not what they expected of him to say. Everyone bursted out laughing about Coran's comment, since they all were waiting for those two to figure out their feelings. After everyone collected their breath Shiro said, "Just so you know Lance, if you hurt my baby brother I will hurt you." "Good thing, that I don't ever plan on hurting him," Lance says looking lovingly into Keith's eyes. No one expect that they're relationship was going to last as long as it did. Two years of being together as of today. The most unexpected thing that would ever happen after their first kiss two years ago. "Keith will you marry me?" Lance asked down on one knee. He ask Shiro a few months ago for promistion to marry Keith. Shiro said yes, and here we are now, waiting for Keith's answer. They didn't know that the rest of the team were watching from a safe distance. "Yes. Yes, Lance I will marry you," Keith exclaimed as Lance put the band onto his finger. Keith kissed Lance, getting so excited about he is going to marry the love of his life. Three months later, the war is now officialy over. So they could all return to earth for a while to see their families, who missed them or thought that they were dead. Or in Keith's case still in space(his mom) and dead(his dad), he still has his Space family and his adoptive parents who didn't really know if he was alive. It was time for the happy couple to get married, on earth. Lance wanted his huge family to see their wedding. Keith went along with it to make Lance happy. But too make them both happy Space Dad would make it official. After Lance's whole family deemed that Keith is good enough for their Lance, they had their dream wedding. "Do you, Keith Kogane take Lance McClain to be your lawfully wedded husband as long as you both shall live?" Space Was asked knowing that they would live long happy lives. "I do," Keith said with a huge smile on his face. "Do you, Lance McClain take Keith Kogane to be your lawfully wedded husband as long as both shall live? So help me if you hurt him, well you know very well what will happen," Shiro said knowing that Lance would never try to hurt as long as he was alive. "I do," Lance said not even fazed by the fact that his to be brother in law was threatening him. He was used to it from his years of dating Keith in space. "You may kiss each other," Shiro say before muttering, " it's not like we don't see that enough as it is." After a while of being married, they realize that they want kids. But sadly they couldn't have kids of their own DNA. So the decided to adopt, well they could physically have kids with something that Coran made but they were not going to trust it. After a year of trying to adopt a kid, they end up with twins that are from earth. They loved their son Nico, and daughter Biancia so much(sorry for adding them in as Percy Jackson characters). The war may have been over, but they still had to protect the universe from evil. So they still lived on the ship. They told their kids stories of earth, they didn't know what it was like on earth since they were adopted as babies and have been living on the ship since. Allura and Shiro became their god parents/ their Space Grandparents. Hunk and Pidge were their Space Uncle and Space Aunt. Shay and Hunk got married and had a son their age, named Will(sorry, not sorry about the names). Pidge met a guy on earth who was just as big of nerd(sorry, couldn't think of another word to describe both of them when I first wrote this), his name was Charles Becondorf(sorry, not sorry). They had twins. Their names are, Percy and Tyson(extremely not sorry). They kids didnt know what earth was like since the only place they knew to call home, was the castle. So their parents decided to show them what their lives were like before the night under the stars. It started of as a one time thing but everyone started to miss their families more, so they started to visit more. (PS.What happens on those trips will be another story, just like the whole thing on wanting kids, also I will do one where they do go with Coran's idea on how they could have kids. I have so many ideas for all of these stories.) (PSS. The names were not used in my original writing. Then when I tried to think of names, all I could think about where from my Solangelo fic that I am currently writing. That may over time be also posted here, we will see once I am done. Till then. Bye)

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whoisntgayforgatsby · 6 years

Text

Secrets Aren't So Secret In A Gay Bar

Nick just wanted to spend a night by himself in the towns secret, underground, gay bar.

Summer has been flying by in such a haze. I’ve done absolutely nothing now that I look back on it. It’s all been me, setting up my cousin, Daisy, a married woman, with my next-door neighbor that I just so happened to have major feelings for, Jay Gatsby. It’s been rough.

I needed time to myself for once, therefore, I have cancelled any and all plans I had for this evening. All except for the ones that involved me going to the secret queer-bar in town. It was in the basement of ‘Sways’, another bar and it was called ‘Bang!’ . It required a password to enter the room.

The word was arbitrium, meaning ‘choice’ in Latin.

Few people knew of it.

I had ate dinner at the little diner next to the bar, not in the mood to cook for myself tonight. I still had an hour to kill before it opened at seven. I decide to browse the shops in the area to pass the time.

I first enter a nice clothing shop that I barely get to look through before I spot Daisy. I don’t want to be dragged along to whatever she’s doing, so, I leave.

Another downside to being hopelessly queer is the fact that being around others was much harder. I couldn’t exactly be out around people as I could be killed or imprisoned for it. It was the worst when I fall for the lovely men - Gatsby - in my friend-groups that are impossibly straight, or, I almost slip up and expose myself to close-minded people. I play a dangerous game by being around others.

I don’t even get to enter the next store I planned to enter, as I spot Gatsby eyeing an expensive watch through the window. I’m stressed and jumpy and end up just sitting in Sways for the next hour or so.

I wait longer than necessary until a few men and a group of ladies make their way down.

I shuffle to the door with the big, kind of scary, guard stood before it. “Hello.” I greet the man and he scowls.

“Password.” He grunts with his deep voice.

I lean in close to him, murmuring the single word into his ear. He cracks a smile and laughs a bit. “It’s not the right way to say it but, go on in.” He permits and I thank him quietly before hurrying down the stairs. It is utterly magical down here. Girls kissing girls, boys touching boys… The music is loud and the people are fancy… I’ve never felt more alive in my entire life.

I spot a handsome man at the bar quite quickly and I saunter to his side. “Well, hello there,” I grin. “Is this seat taken?” I hum lowly, motioning to the stool next to him.

“Oh, Lord. For a man as rakishly handsome as you, even if it happened to be taken, I would tell you otherwise.” His voice is deep and he has a lisp as he reaches to touch my arm.

“You are much better looking, Sir. I assure you of that.” I let my eyes wander him.

“That is very untrue… Do you have a name to fit that handsome face?”

“Nick.” I answer and he smiles.

“Lovely, fitting… I’m Eric.” He flutters his lashes at me.

“Perfect name for such a wonderful face.” I brush a strand of hair from his brown eyes.

“I’ve never seen you here before, Nick.” I notice that I don’t like the way my name sounds on his tongue and I flinch.

“Yeah, first time. Been too busy playing matchmaker all summer.” We both chuckle.

“Well, tonight, you get to be your own matchmaker, I assume?” He flicks his brows up.

“Are you trying to take me home?” I run my tongue over my lips. All I could see for us was maybe a fling or two. I didn’t have that feeling, that need or want to have him. I didn’t feel the way that Gatsby made me feel. That’s how I can tell the future.

“Maybe~.” He hums with a smirk.

So, I kiss him. It’s not as good as I’d hoped for it to be but, it was something. I bite at his lip to spice things up a bit and he shoves his tongue into my mouth, exploring it like a cave.

When I pull away, neither of us look very satisfied with it.

“Uh…” He looks about the room. “What do you do for work?” He mutters awkwardly.

“Um, stocks. I work in them.” I answer, not fully paying attention as I look about the room of new people and faces. People I could fall in love with possibly.

“Yeah… Sounds, um… Cool. I'm an accountant.” He's also far from our conversation which fell apart over a very shitty kiss.

I scan the room more and I feel all the blood drain from my body as my eyes fall upon none other than Jay Gatsby.

“Oh, God…” I gape and Eric looks to find what I'm looking at.

“What?”

“I know him,” I croak. “He's my neighbor .” I choke and suddenly I can't breathe.

“He is? Is he gay?” Eric questions but I can't answer and jump from my stool.

I give Eric a wave of my hand, either meaning ' be right back ’ or ' goodbye’ and I couldn't care less which one he took it as.

I dash through the tightly packed crowd and into the bathroom, just hoping I wasn't spotted. As soon as I get in there, I hunch over, one hand on my knee and the other on my chest as I pant and my heart pounds so hard I can feel it in my veins.

I'm panicking. I think I am at least.

Why was Gatsby here? Why had he insisted on me setting him up with Daisy? Why? What was this summer supposed to be?

Once I'm able to calm myself and not throw-up with nerves, I step back into the loud bar full of people. I look around and just as I spot Gatsby, he spots me. I feel myself crumble as we both give one another a panicked look and I duck back into the bathroom to hyperventilate.

The door swings open and in bursts Gatsby moments later. He grabs me by the shoulders and at first, I think he may kiss me. But, that's just my stupid fantasies.

“Nick, old sport! What-... What are you doing here?” The calm and cool Gatsby I knew was gone and his words were frantic as his hair dangled down in his eyes. I can see his Adam's apple bob as he swallows forcefully, his jaw shifting as his fingers tighten on my shoulders.

“I-... I think you know. I think it's obvious why I'm here… But, why are you? You have Daisy.” I stammer out. He swallows again.

“Just-... I came to-... Find you, old sport!” He exclaims. “I needed your help and I-... Saw you come in?” He doesn’t seem as confidant in this lie as he had been in the first one.

“There’s a password, Gatsby.”

“Don’t need one, I’m Jay Gatsby. I just say I have business and they let me in.” He crossed his arms, dropping his grip on me to do so.

“That is an even bigger reason not to let you in! If people like you just waltz on in here, it’ll be shut down and everybody will be arrested in minutes!” I snap in a hushed tone. Gatsby frowns deeply at me.

“What is that supposed to mean? People ‘ like me ’?” He scowls.

“Straight, white, rich men from East and West Egg that feel like they can have the world because they have money, Gatsby.” I glare. I don’t mean to be so awful to him but, I’m bitter and angry over every piece of him and myself right now.

“Wow… Okay, I get it now.” He lets out a shaking breath and turns. I hear him sniff.

“I didn’t mean you , I meant the others.”

“I’ll leave you then.”

And, Gatsby was off. I follow him, calling after him until we were in the street and he got into that bright yellow coupe of his and sped off.

I hail a cab and head to Gatsby’s, only to find he didn’t come home. I felt like a jackass for what I’d done and said. He didn’t deserve that. It’s all because I’m mad that I love him and that he loves Daisy. It just wasn’t fair . I try so hard for him because I’m in love with him and I want to never see him upset. Now, I’m the reason that he’s gone missing.

He’s probably just with Daisy.

Of course he liked her better. Anybody would. Being me was not special or spectacular like I wanted it to be. I was just Nick Carraway, the guy in the tiny bungalow behind the most wonderful and rich man’s mansion. I was just the guy who watched, who curled into himself and hid from everything. I wasn’t Gatsby, chasing down and catching whatever the hell he pleased, nor was I Daisy, a beautiful being with every man wishing to have me. I wasn’t even Tom for Heaven’s sakes. I mean, he still was popular to people compared to me.

I kick up stones as I cut through the back of Gatsby’s house to reach mine. The summer is fading away and I can just about feel the nip of fall biting at my exposed skin.

I keep my head down, ashamed of myself for being so selfish and rude to the man I cared so deeply for. I keep it down until I reach my drive, lifting it and my eyes meeting blue ones. “Nick.”

Gatsby.

He stands up from sitting on my porch step, brushing off his bum. “Nick, I’m so sorry for running off like that. It was rude and immature.”

“No! No, Gatsby, I shouldn’t have been so harsh.” I insist as I come face to face with him.

“I was lying and frantic when I should’ve just been up front with you.” He shakes his head, frowning.

“What do you mean?” I ask. “I mean, I know you were lying but, what are you talking about?”

Gatsby steps a little closer and touches my forearm lightly. “You see, old sport, I did at one time think I loved Daisy… Time changes things and when I first saw you there was an undeniable pull, this alluring yank that ripped me from my fixation on the past and it pulled me to the future. I, at first, tried to, well, hold onto Daisy, but, after I saw her again, I knew I didn’t feel for her any longer…” He pauses and looks about, avoiding my eyes. “And, well, Nick, old sport, I kept it going because it brought me closer to you.”

“Gatsby...” I gawk. “What are you saying?” My voice is but a whisper. Gatsby's warm hands now rest on my shoulders and he forces himself to look me directly in the eye.

“I'm saying , all of it, every single thing, old sport, is all for you . I did it all because I've fallen hopelessly in love with you.” His fingers get tight as he's telling me this, nervous and trembling. “I was young and stupid and never loved before… I thought that you could only feel that once in your life and I thought I had with Daisy. But, after I left to war, I realized that she was special because ladies didn't catch my fancy.”

“You love me, Gatsby?” Was the only thing I could think to say to his speech declaring his very much required feelings.

His hands slip from me and hit his sides, he looks away and when his voice finally comes, it's broken and weak. “Yes, Nick… I do… Love you, that is. I was hoping it would go away but it hasn't and I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have… Said anything.” He hangs his head and I think he may cry, so, I reach and touch his wrist, my fingers brushing the top of his hand.

“Jay, I have feelings for you too. I thought it was blatantly obvious.” I say in a hushed, soothing tone.

“You do? I was trying so hard to impress you that I guess I just thought…” He trails.

“What are you talking about? That was all for Daisy .” I say.

“Well, I couldn't have exactly put an obscene amount of flowers in your house and said ' oh, and by the way, these are for you, not Daisy because I think I'm in love with you.’ Now, could I?” He sighs, frustrated.

“Well, I thought that it was obvious that I had feelings for you when I did anything and everything asked of me,” I say. “I followed you around like a lost puppy.”

“I did that to Dan Cody and I wasn't in love with him.” Gatsby answers.

“But, you wanted his money so it's different.”

He stares at me after that, running his eyes over my body many times before looking back at our shoes, pointed toe-to-toe.

“Can-... May I kiss you?” He looks up at me through the stray hairs in his eyes.

“Please.”

And, so, he does.

#Natsby #the Great Gatsby #Gatsby #Jay Gatsby #Nick Carraway

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billyharris · 6 years

Text

✵ ― Hard Times

I literally was just trying to sleep because I have to function tomorrow and in the middle of my nap, I was awoken by the devil telling me to write this fic right away. And I sort of got carried away. Also shoutout to me. This is my first Eddie-centric fic. I love my dead gay son so much. i’m going to call out @rememberingtozier because look !! I wrote fluff, who knew I could ?!?!

Words ;; 1850 ･ﾟ Pairing ;; Richie Tozier / Eddie Kaspbrak ･ﾟ Warnings ;; FLUFF BOYS, Strong language, pot smoking mentioned, an overall gay vibe

❝ — Richie had been crashing at Eddie’s the past week or so. The two had yet to really touch on the fact that Wentworth and Maggie had yelled at Richie to leave and never come back . Eddie hated that he had to see Richie like this. So broken and defeated. He felt like he was unwanted, abandoned. He craved attention so much. It explained why he was the front runner for class clown five years in a row. But Eddie and the losers knew the truth behind all the ‘your mom’ jokes and dick puns. He was all but homeless as of a month ago and still made an effort to make his friends laugh. It was incredible. He was incredible.

Eddie shuffled in the bed, Richie snoring alongside him. He turned to face the window, sun rays cutting through the ivory, plastic blinds. Eddie watched Richie sleep for a few moments. Just taking in the view. Eddie had developed feelings for the trashmouth long ago. He rolled his eyes and got mad when Richie cracked jokes, but Eddie wouldn’t have it any other way. And spending the past seven days sharing a tiny twin bed with the boy only made his feelings grow.

When Richie dropped the bomb that he was not welcome back home, there was nothing but chaos. All the losers yelled over one another, shouting different forms of ‘what the fuck ?!’ at Richie. But he was calm. He waved at them, waiting for them to calm down. He didn’t seem phased. It was not like Richie to want to bother his friends. After the chaos settled, Richie explained himself (to a degree). Not fully explaining the logic behind their huge fight.

Stan took the first session. They were best friends after all. Eddie often thought about that. If Rich and Stan were the closest out of the losers, what did that make them ?? He liked to think him and the curly haired boy got along just a much as him and Stanley. But they always seemed to have these moments where neither of them could cross the line from friendship to something more. An invisible wall of awkward preventing them from making progress. What that progress entailed was still unknown to the two of them.

Richie stayed at Stan’s for about a month, all without papa Uris finding out. Andrea snuck extra food to Stan for Richie and it was going fine for a good amount of time. But the jewish holidays came up, and with family coming in and out, Richie had to move on. Eddie was next. Sonia would flip if a homeless kid was squatting in her home. It was for the best if they kept it all under wraps. Richie climbed through Eddie’s window each night and they stayed shacked up like they used to when they were kids. Eddie couldn’t wait for the rustling outside his window. He counted the minutes after school until he arrived.

Eddie’s alarm went off and Richie’s eyes shot open. Eddie quickly turned to smash the snooze button, so not to look like he was just watching his friend sleep for the past ten minutes. His heart was racing. These thoughts for Richie. Thoughts about snuggling him, holding his hand in public, kissing him were not new. But they were sixteen now and a little too old for crushes. What Eddie felt for Richie was far more than that.

“Five more minutes...” Richie moaned, taking the blanket and pulling it over his head.

“You need to shower before school, mister.” Eddie poked at the hump in the comforter, to which a hand came out and slapped away. Eddie just chuckled, grabbing Richie by the shoulders and shaking him. “Wake up, sleepy head !!” Richie moaned again and this one was so groggy and low, coming from the back of the boy’s throat. It made the hairs on the back of Eddie’s neck stand up. Fuck - it was beautiful sounding and it didn’t help that the noise was coming from a boy in Eddie’s bed. He regained his composure and pulled the covers back, revealing Richie’s speckled back. Since when did he sleep without his shirt on ?? Both tore off their pants before hopping into bed together - that was just normal, because honestly who sleeps with pants on ?? Eddie barely noticed it. He tells himself he barely notices. But the truth was two nights ago, their bare thighs collided in the middle of the night and Eddie nearly had an asthma attack. But this whole sleeping with no shirt on ?? This was very new. New and very alarming.

“Okay! Okay. Eds, I’m awake.” Richie murmured, head stuffed into the pillow. He turned his head to face the shorter boy, gripping the pillow under him, as he yawned. He curled his back up, a disgusting popping noise resonating from the stretch.

Eddie made a disgusted face - as if he wasn’t thinking that Richie’s bare back should be named the new eighth wonder of the world. Richie squinted, rubbing his face before yawning once more. “Ugh, what time is it ??” Richie couldn’t see a thing. Eddie’s room was just a blur of blues.

“Oh - um - seven something -” Eddie squeaked out, having a hard time speaking because Richie was now leaning over him, patting around the end table for his glasses. “You forgot about last night, didn’t you ??”

Richie was out with Bev last night. Eddie could practically smell the weed smell before Richie began giggling outside his window. He would be annoyed, if it weren’t for the fact that Richie was clearly going through a lot and Eddie didn’t want to judge him for coping the only way he knew how. When Ed propped open the window, a wasted Richie tumbled to the floor, a lens from his glasses popping right out and cracking. Richie was way too exhausted to do anything about it right there and then. He started to kick off his pants and buried himself under the covers saying something along the lines of ‘that’s an issue for tomorrow - Eds.’

Richie then picked up the broken frames and sighed, memories clearly re-filling his brain. “Right...Well fuck...” Now Richie was just hovering over Eddie without a care in the world. As if his bare chest wasn’t just there, right in Eddie’s face. It was marvelous in so many ways. The moles and beauty marks that scattered all over his torso, the slight scar he got from jumping off the monkey bars when they were twelve. Even the dumb stick and poke tattoo of the Pythagorean theorem he gave himself on his ribcage while stoned on his birthday four months back. All of it was glorious. Maybe he lingered too long, but could you blame him ?? This was the closest he’s ever been to a near naked Richie in so long. And for sure - not since he started seeing the male form in a - sexual - way. He was just in his boxers and casually sitting on top of him, fiddling with his broken glasses - as if he wasn’t destroying Eddie from the inside out. Then Richie put the glasses back on the end-table, making the effort to lean down again and on his way back up, Eddie and Richie were mere centimeters from kissing. A gasp left the anxiety-stricken boy. “Woah there - Eddie Spaghetti. That was a close one.” He laughed. “No need to stare - I know I can barely see, but I can practically feel you undressing me with your eyes.”

“You’re not wearing any clothes.” Eddie fought back, trying to get the blame off him. Because he was very much staring.

“Yeah. Well.... I was hot last night. Stripped my shirt off...No big deal...”

“You are hot.” Eddie said casually and then the words caught up and he let out a noise that only could be described as a yelp.

“What ?”

“What ?!” Eddie shadowed, much louder and high pitched.

Then there was this long pause between the two of them. Too long. It was really awkward, Richie couldn’t see Eddie’s panicked stare. He was kicking himself for speaking from his heart. He couldn’t help himself. He was falling for his best friend and you’d have to be as blind as the trashmouth to not see they had chemistry. The fact was the last few years, their friendship seemed to fizzle. Holding hands and pinching cheeks became awkward with age and the two’s puppy love had to be pushed aside. When they were alone, they let some things slip through the guarded cracks, but it still didn’t feel right. Both unsure of one another’s feelings - they were left at this stand-still of cautious touches and concealed feelings. But Eddie had enough. He couldn’t stand watching Richie in udder awe of his beauty and not being able to call him his own. So Eddie, for once in his life - wasn’t afraid. He lifted himself up and grabbed the boy’s cheeks laying a quick kiss to his lips. Richie’s instincts were to reach out and hold up Eddie, both pulling back a slight distance to marvel at each other.

“You really think I’m hot, Eds ??” Richie joked, but there was a slight lace of serenity there. He had this sweet smile on his features, like he was waiting for this moment as long as Eddie had been. So many people nowadays had been pushing away Richie. He was a burden - having to sneak into his friend’s houses for shelter. He felt like no one wanted him. But Eddie did. And that made the trashmouth feel genuinely happy. A feeling he hadn’t felt in a long time. The truth was he was kicked out of his house over a fight about him coming out. He confined in his mother that he was falling in love with his best friend, Eddie. Thinking the drunk wouldn’t even notice what he was saying or remember. But instead Maggie told Wentworth and sparked an all out Tozier screaming match. A fight that ended in Richie being disowned.

“Maybe a little...” Richie was blushing now - Eds probably too. The two attempting to hide their faces. Not like Rich could see. But then Richie leaned back in, kissing Eddie once more. They deepened their embrace, Eddie reaching up to tangle his fingers in the boy’s beautiful curls.

The alarm blared again. Both boys jumping back to stare at the clock. If they didn’t get ready now, they would miss homeroom. Or at least Richie assumed, because he could in no way make out the numbers. A unison sigh fell from both their lips, when they concluded they would have to cut their moment short. The two both laughed, inaudible from the loud barring of the alarm. But in that moment Richie - leaning over to turn off the alarm, letting his lips collide with Eddie once more - never felt more at home.

notes: I guess I could write a part two if people wanted it ?? I’ve got some ideas ;)

#reddie #eddie kaspbrak #reddie fic #reddie fanfiction #richie tozier #richie x eddie #[ F ]

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shazyloren · 6 years

Text

The Dragon Club: Chapter 44 - Calls and Calms

Link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/12018519/chapters/28938954

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Daenerys' next few days in Sri Lanka were some of the best she'd ever had in her life (even if someone wasn't there to appreciate it with her). She'd met some incredible wildlife preservationists, some wonderful elephants and had enjoyed getting to know them all. One elephant in particular, a baby elephant named Rai, had been so smitten with Daenerys she'd genuinely considered taking it home. Although an elephant in an apartment building was not a good idea, a bit like a bull in a china shop.

She had eaten with the videographer crew for two nights, enjoying the weather more as it cooled slightly and the breeze increased. Even Jorah had found the weather manageable and had loved the hotel staff and efficiency of how it ran. Daenerys had also enjoyed trying foods she'd never had before, drinks she'd never thought of combining and singing by a campfire on the beach in front of the hotel (not that she could hold a tune). All in all, she was so happy the WWF had suggested she'd come out here and meet the people behind the hard work they were doing. And it gave her more happiness with things to come, particularly the limited edition magazine she was doing with them.

It was on her last night in Sri Lanka in which they go back from the reserve, both Jorah and Daenerys had decided to just have dinner between the two of them that evening. It had been a long week and both were exhausted, wanting nothing more than some food, wine and rest. They'd be flying back home tomorrow, not long until she could possibly see Jon, if everything went okay. She'd seen pictures on his instagram and twitter of the Stark clan on holiday in Greece and had also seen that Arya, the youngest daughter, was pregnant. It filled her with glee that his family was so happy. She just wanted to be a part of it. Even Margaery had a nice photo with their mother, meaning all was accepted in terms of their daughter being gay.

Daenerys looked at Jon in these photos and found a sense of longing she'd been building up coming to a head in her body. She really was stupidly in love with him, his love of animals had inspired her to really push this collaboration with the WWF in the first place. Enough moping, Daenerys, she thought bitterly, you'll see him soon enough, when everything is sorted.

But unfortunately, not everything was sorted. When she and Jorah pulled up to the hotel coming back from the reservation, she saw the video crew had arrived back safely too. Nodding in a small hello, they made their way into the hotel lobby where there was a few people crowded around the front desk. One spotted her and quickly jogged over too her. "Miss. Targaryen?"

"Yes?" Daenerys asked confused.

"We've received a phone call from America. We've kept the number for you to ring back, I believe it was a man called..." She pulled a notepad out and showed her. She saw Qhono's name written down. She was instantly filled with dread. What had happened? Was he okay? Is her family okay? Did this mystery person try to attack them? Jorah saw her panicked look on her face and instantly went over to the phone booth to ring the number back. It was going to be an expensive phone call, but they needed to understand what was happening.

"Go to your room and get ready for Dinner, Daenerys" She was about to protest but Jorah shut her off. "There's nothing we can do, we'll go to dinner like normal and I'll fill you in on what's happened when I come up to the rooms, go get cleaned up"

Daenerys stood rooted for a few seconds before sighing and giving in. She stormed over to the lift and got in with the two video guys who were coming up to their room on the floor above them. There was silence as the lift closed. Daenerys was seething but Jorah was right, there was nothing she could do until he got more information. The Australian videographer spoke to her. "Trouble in paradise?"

"No" She said in monotone.

"Sounds like it, old curly mop finally leave you?" He asked snickering. Daenerys turned with eyes like fire, her hot-headed temperament filling the lift. She glared him down, he meekly took a step back in the lift. He tutted at her attitude but she didn't care, her family could be in trouble and she was powerless to do anything. They opened on her floor and she got out, storming to her door leaving the guys behind her. Now she definitely couldn't function. He was in Greece! She couldn't contact him, even if she or he wanted too. Oh why is everything such a shit show? She sighed.

She needed to calm down and so she ran a shower, hoping the falling water on her head would soothe her tense muscles. Why couldn't anything go as planned? Perhaps it all goes down to Karma, the fact she did not help that poor girl and her mother, and now the girl was dead and her mother soon to be.

No, you can't keep blaming yourself, you did not know. She did not tell you until it was to late. Daenerys tried to stop the shaking in her body as she locked the bathroom door and stripped her moist and sticky clothes off of her skin, peeling them as her sweat dripped from the days excursions. She threw them into a pile to go into her black bin bag to take home to wash her stuff. Checking the temperature of the water she climbed into the shower and took a deep breath. Her body instantly calmed down, the water running over her shoulders and back, as if caressing her body with cleanliness.

It was in this moment she thought of Jon again, not intentionally, but the caressing of the water made her think of his arms and the way they used to hold her. The way his strength used to make her strong, not scared like in... other times. The way his eyes fell onto her body, not in a creepy way, but in a way of showing her how much he adored her. The way his hair fell in front of his face when he was on top of her.

She felt the build of tension inside her once again, the tension she'd been ignoring all week.

Now is not the time, she tried to steady herself, now is not the time for this.

Her body had other ideas, without her really committing, her hands had wandered to her own breasts and had began squeezing and massaging them. Her hips bucked slightly as she leaned on the wall of the shower, her bottom pressed against the glass as the shower steamed the room up. If this had been an more like something from a movie Daenerys would've laughed, but her orgasm was building in her lower abdomen so much she was struggling to think properly.

And so her hands began to travel down herself, Jon in her mind all the while as her breathing became erratic. As soon as her hand glided over her sex she jumped slightly, the touch while wanted, caused a spark of electricity through her small frame. She was inwardly cursing Jon the whole time, why had he come into her brain now? When her family could be in danger?

She blamed the distance apart, looking for any excuse not to admit she missed him being inside her. Not wanting to admit to herself that she became so dependent on him that now in their absence apart she's practically crying out for him to take her. But he was thousands of miles away, and didn't her body know it. As she touched herself, she whispered her name. "Jon"

It sounded like she was in pain, but of course she was, not seeing him. Again his name fell from her lips as she slipped a finger inside herself. And as she became more and more out of breathe and her finger sped up inside her, she cursed not being able to hear how loud she was being. No one was on the floor besides her and Jorah, btu if she didn't keep it down everyone in the hotel would her. But it was over, just like that, a final muttering of his name as she came all on herself. The want gone.

"You will be the death of me, Jon Snow"

Cursing the stupid wolf, she climbed out of the shower and began to dry herself off. She grabbed the bathrobe and the hairdryer the hotel provided and began drying her hair. Satisfied with the hair being mostly dry she left the bathroom and went about picking an outfit to put on. It was a little while later until she head any movements outside her door. in fact she was fully dressed for dinner by the time Jorah asked to enter. Being thankful that she was not still masturbating in the shower she opened the door.

"Your family is fine" He said assertively. "Daario was at their house watching them in case of anything. It was at the apartment"

"What happened?" She demanded to know.

"Someone tried to break in, a man. Qhono didn't see his face, it was covered. But he was big apparently, bigger than Daario. I asked. It seems like Jon is incorrect on this occasion" Jorah smirked. Daenerys still didn't find any of this funny. "Nothing was taken, nothing. The man packed a mean punch, knocked Qhono out within minutes of them fighting"

"Whoever it was wanted me then, if nothing was taken" Daenerys wasn't stupid, and Jorah didn't treat her so. He just nodded. "Did he ring the police?"

"Yes, after he woke up from the attack. Your neighbour several floors below also called noticing a strange man walking into the building when he shouldn't have access" Jorah confirmed. Daenerys sighed as she processed all the information. "The police checked your panic room to make sure it was working, they recommended that if when you get home it happens again you got straight there and wait until they arrive. Qhono didn't tell them about the messages Jon received. He just said that an unwanted someone had been trying to get into contact with you"

"Good" Daenerys nodded. Sighing at feeling so helpless she grabbed her bag, noting Jorah had also changed before coming her. "There's nothing we can do now, like you said. Lets go enjoy our last night her, tomorrow is going to be a long flight"

And so they eat good food, and drank good wine while the heat subsided and the cool sea breeze took over. But all the while they did, she couldn't help feel something worse was coming. Something needed to be done, she couldn't keep looking over her shoulder in fear. She sighed once more, hoping Jon was having a simpler holiday than she was.

#jon snow #daenerys targaryen #jon x daenerys #jon x dany #jon x dany fanfic #au #jonerys #jonerys fanfic #got #game of thrones #modern au #fanfic #Modern Setting #the dragon club

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bemorecronch · 7 years

Text

The Hand that Flannels (Male Reader X Jared Kleinman)

For that one anon! Sorry it's not smutty, WARNING: light making out and some fluff, swearing and drinking. You placed the empty cup down on the mantle. Fuck this party. The music was terrible and you barely knew anyone; Brooke was the only girl you knew and she’d ditched you for her girlfriend Chloe, but she was also your ride home. You didn't want to stand in the corner and be miserable so you made the very conscious decision to get drunk as fuck. You were only three beers in and weren't feeling anything. Glancing around the room you planned your route to grab another drink, but were stopped in your tracks by a figure standing in front of you. It was Jared. Shit. He was such an asshole. That one kid who very openly laughed when someone got the answer wrong, or who thought his sarcastic comments were the most important part of a conversation. He leaned against the wall, “didn't think you came to things like this.” “Didn't think you got invited to things like this.” You shot back. You think you saw him flinch for half a second but he shrugged it off, “my parents rang the hosts parents so- not that I'm bragging.” He was smirking and you raised your eyebrows, “wow.” Sarcasm dripping from you. He leaned back, “so why you here?” He changed the subject quickly and you both started moving towards the beer, “my friend said she'd stick with me if I came.” “Where is she?” “No idea.” You see him smile a little, “yeah I've got no one to talk to either.” You cocked your head to the side and smirked, “you mean constantly correcting people and judging them doesn't overwhelm you with friends?” You're tone is a little lighter and playful and you see him relax, “shut up.” There's a second where you think you might be enjoying his company, “so your plan is what? Get drunk and try to like the people here?” He asked and you nodded, taking a drink and handing it to him before grabbing one for yourself, “pretty much. You?” “Find someone as miserable looking as me to hang out with until my mom picks me up.” You choke on your drink as your eyes light up, “your mom?” You repeat and see him duck his head, “look, I don't have a car what was I meant to do?” He spoke quick and a little aggressively and you out your hand up in surrender, “I was just messing with you… My friend can probably give you a ride home if it means you won't be beaten up quite so severely by literally anyone who sees you getting in your mothers car.” You try to make it sound casual and he looks up, “yeah. Ok. Thanks… I'll text my mom.” He brings out his phone and sends a message, looking back at you a little embarrassed. There's a moment when you look at him that you swear you can see him blush, but he downs his drink quickly after, so it's hard to tell. As what feels like the hundredth person pushes past you, you look around- “it's way too crowded, wanna go outside?” He nods, “god yeah. What about your friend?” You look quickly to seeing Brooke doing body shots off her girlfriend, “yeah I’m sure she’s good.” You both pushed past the now fully drunk teenagers to let the cool air hit you. It wasn't exactly cold, but in a t-shirt you could feel yourself shudder. He glanced at you and wordlessly took off his flannel shirt and out it around you, “smooth.” You mutter, nudging him. He rubs the back of his neck, “whatever. Don't bite the hand that flannels.” You smirk and pull it around you a little closer, grateful as a breeze hit you. “You're a lot nicer than you come across.” It was more a subconscious thought, and you're not entirely sure how it found itself outside your head, but once you said it he let out a loud, bizarre laugh. Like if a bouncy-ball had hiccups in an echoey hall. He grinned, “you too.” You must look a little offended because he looks panicked, “I just mean- you know, you're so quiet and you roll your eyes a lot.” You feel yourself biting backs smile, “well you say some obnoxious shit. Someone should be rolling their eyes.” He prods your arm lightly, “I can take that flannel back anytime.” You mimic him, “I'd like to see you try.” He's smiling, and he's got a fantastic smile. You can feel yourself staring and you quickly snap your vision away. Jared looked away too, “I don't say obnoxious shit.” He chuckled, and you leaned against the door frame, “yes. You do. You said 80’s movies were terrible.” “And I stand by it.” “Alright,” you turn to him and pull the flannel tight as another gust come through, “we have to have an 80’s movie night. Breakfast club, Lost Boys, Ferris Bueller, all of them.” He gulped hard and gave a small, shaky smile “are you asking me out on a date?” There's a heavy mocking sense to his words, but his eyes actually look a little hopeful. You feel your face flush, “get over yourself.” You laugh, now fully unable to make eye contact with him. Suddenly you feel an arm link into yourself, your heart jumps into your mouth when you think it's Jared, but you turn and see a wasted Brooke hanging off you, “babe I can't driiive.” She whines into your ear. Chloe's behind her, barely standing and supported only by holding Brooke's waist. You look at her and smile, “looks like we’re walking. You gonna be ok for a few blocks?” You ask and she nods sleepily. You turn back to Jared, “sorry- shit you cancelled your ride and everything.” He started sauntering beside you, “yeah you're a total inconvenience. I don't really have a choice except to walk with you.” You smirk, watching Chloe and Brooke walk a head giggling, “you're allowed to want to walk home with us.” You whisper, dramatically looking around for whatever spies Jared was convinced were following him, trying to catch him being nice. He shoves you with his shoulder and sighs, “yeah- I mean you did ask me out before.” You feel that familiar heat rising to your cheeks, “you're not terrible to be around. The word ‘tolerable’ comes to mind…” You watch him stuff his hands in his pockets and figure you may as well dip your toe in, linking your arm around his, you're not sure if he’s into guys or not but this is… Excusable right? This is just a friendly gesture, “…so I wouldn't mind spending some of my free time with you.” You grin and catch him staring at you before he snaps out of it, “wow. Was that Shakespeare?” He laughs You happily spend the rest of the walk like that. Comfortable jabs at each other intermingled with passive-aggressive compliments. You keep your arm around his for the walk, getting closer to one another so that in the silences you can actually rest your head on his shoulder. You wave Brooke and Chloe into Brooke’s parents house as you walk along together. You mention the movies he's definitely going to be forced into watching, and he's distraught that you haven't seen episodes 1 to 3 of Star Wars, so they too are added to an ever growing list. Once you reach your house you pause, “how're you getting home? You just sort of kept walking.” You ask. He shrugs, “I’ll text my mom again, she won't mind.” “How long will it take her to get here?” You're trying to sound casual, with the distinct feeling that you're failing. He looks at the clock on his phone, “10, 15 minutes?” He shrugged and you looked at your house. You're parents would be asleep. You shift your weight on you feet and glance at him, “you wanna like… Wait inside?” He looks up; eyes wide, “if that's ok?” You nod and lead him in and unlocking the door. He sat down on your sofa and you made your way to the kitchen. You glance in through the door frame, “Do you want tea?” “Are you gay?” You pause, “what?” “Nothing.” He stutters. You sit beside him and turn to look at his now beetroot face. You nod, “I’m attracted to guys… Is that a problem?” He shook his head, “no, it's good- I uh… I'm… That too.” he's stumbling and can't even look at you, you fight down a smile, “gay?” You ask and he nods. Every fibre of you tells you not to- but maybe those beers are effecting you more than you'd like. You watch yourself lean in and kiss him lightly on the lips, cupping the side of his face. He didn't move and your pretty sure his eyes are still open, but he lets out a small squeak. You pull away, feeling his gaze on you as you turn pink and hold your breath waiting for some sort of sign. You turn completely away and feel anxiety grow in the pit of your stomach, “Jesus I'm sor…” You start, but you can't finish. He's kissing you. His slightly chapped lips pressing against yours as the smell of way too strong cologne fills you up. You part your lips slightly and bite his bottom lip and tongues brush against the act other. You pull him slightly on top of you as he leans in between your knees. You run your hands through his hair as his hands fumble their way up to your shoulders and hold on. You fight back a smile realising quite suddenly he has no real idea what he's doing. You pull away and kiss the crook of his jaw, trying to be careful not to leave a mark. You hear him whisper your name and you bite a little harder, you never knew you could be actually turned on by a dork like Jared Kleinman. He traces a hand up the back of the thigh if your jeans and you kiss down his neck to his collar bone; sucking lightly until you heard his breath hitch. “Please…” He whimpers, “I can't get in my moms car with a boner.” He sounded desperate and you smirk, “I mean maybe don't talk- about your mom- when I'm kissing your neck.” You speak into his jaw and feel him nod, “right, sorry.” You smile, blushing as you slowly feel blood rushing from your head to your crotch. He kisses you again, ever so slightly more confident as he holds your hips and pushes back your hair, finding some sort of rhythm in himself that neither of you knew he had. You can feel your shirt riding up as he pushes his hand up your stomach to your chest. You're blushing heavily as you realise you’ve wanted this for longer than you thought. Actually, you want him to rip your clothes off you right now and pull your legs apart and just start- HONK You both freeze. He looks behind his shoulder, “was that?” HONK “Your mom’s car.” You answer, sitting up straight and pull your shirt down; trying to not look so disappointed. He stuffs his hands in his pockets trying to hide a still fairly obvious erection. He gets up slowly, sighing in pain as he stands and you get up to open the door, “see you at class?” You ask. He kisses you quickly, pecking you on the lips, “see you then.” You're embarrassed to admit you feel your heart flutter. You watch him climb into the back seat of the car and drive away. You smile to yourself as you close the door, fully aware that during that movie marathon you'd planned, neither of you would be watching any of them.

#jared kleinman #jared kleinman x reader #DEH #dear evan hansen #bemorecronch

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