#as in i wrote this a while back

[inkskinned]

i got rickrolled today but it didn't work because i have adblocker installed, so youtube just told me i violated the terms of service. yesterday i was trying to edit a picture as a joke for my girlfriend, and google made me check a box to prove i'm human because i wasn't "searching normally".

it isn't just that capitalism is killing fun and whimsy, it is that any element of entertainment or joy is being fed upon by this mosquito body, one that will suck you dry at any vulnerability.

do you want to meet new friends in your city? download this app, visit our website, sign up for our email list. pay for this class on making a terrarium, on candlemaking, on cooking. it will be 90 dollars a session. you can go to group fitness, but only under our specific gym membership. solve the puzzle, sign up for our puzzle-of-the-month-club. what is a club if not just a paid opportunity - you are all paying for the same thing, which makes you a community.

but you're like me, i know it - you're careful, you try the library meetings and the stuff at the local school and all of that. the problem is that you kind of want really specific opportunities that used to exist. you are so grateful for libraries and the publicly-funded things: they are, however, an exception - and everything they have, they've fought tooth-and-nail to protect. you read a headline about how in many other states, libraries have virtually nothing left.

do you want to meet up with your friends afterwards? gift your friends the discord app. you can choose to go to a cafe (buy a coffee, at least), a bar (money, alcohol) or you can all stay in and catch a movie (streaming) or you can all stay in bed (rent. don't get me started) and scream (noise complaint. ticket at least).

you want to read a new book, but the book has to have 124 buzzwords from tiktok readers that are, like, weirdly horny. you can purchase this audiobook on audible! your podcast isn't on spotify, it's on its own server, pay for a different site. fuck, at least you're supporting artists you like. the art museum just raised their ticket price. once, they had a temporary exhibit that acknowledged that ~85% of their permanent art galleries were from cis white men, and that they had thousands of works by women (even famous women, like frida! georgia o'keefe!) just rotting in their basement. that exhibit lasted for 3 months and then they put everything away again.

walmart proudly supports this strip of land by the street! here are some flowers with wilting leaves. its employees have to pay out-of-pocket for their uniforms. my friend once got fined by the city because she organized a community pick-up of the riverfront, which was technically private property.

no, you cannot afford to take that dance class, neither can i. by the way - i'm a teacher. i'm absolutely not saying "educators shouldn't be paid fairly." i'm saying that when i taught classes, renting a studio went from 20 bucks an hour to 180 in the span of 6 months. no significant changes to the studio were made, except they now list the place as updated and friendly. the heat still doesn't work in the building. i have literally never seen the landlord who ignores my emails. recently they've been renting it out at night as an "unusual nightclub; a once-in-a-lifetime close-knit party." they spent some of those 180 dollars on LEDs and called it renovating. the high heels they invite in have been ruining the marley.

do you want to experience the old internet? do you want to play flash games or get back the temporary joy of club penguin? you can, you just need to pay for it. i have a weird, neurodivergent obsession with occasionally checking in to watch the downfall and NFT-ification of neopets. if i'm honest with you all - i never got into webkins, my family didn't have the money to buy me a pointless elephant. people forget that "being poor" can mean literally "if i buy you that toy, i can't afford rent."

you and i don't have time to make good food, and we don't have the budget for it. we are not gonna be able to host dinner parties, we're not made of money, kid. do you want some kind of 3rd space? a space that isn't home or work or school? you could try being online, but - what places actually exist for you? tiktok counts as social media because you see other people on it, not because they actually talk to you.

there was a local winter tradition of sledding down the hill at my school. kids would use pizza boxes and jackets and whatever worked, howling and laughing. back in september, they made a big announcement that this time, rules were changing, and everyone must pay 10 dollars to participate. when im not scared shitless, i kind of appreciate the environmental irony - it hasn't gone below 40. so much for snow & joyriding.

i saw a bulletin for a local dogwalking group and, nervous about making a good first impression, showed up early. the first guy there grimaced at me. "sorry," he said. "there's a 30-dollar buy-in fee." i thought he was joking. wait. for what? the group doesn't offer anything except friendship and people with whom to walk around the city.

he didn't know the answer. just shrugged at me. "you know," he said. "these days, everything costs money."

#spilled ink #warm up #“why did u tag it warm up” bc i wrote it off the cuff while drinkin coffee lol #btw the 30 dollar buy in for the dog walking is bc they pay the organizer a small pittance so she can #run fb ads and stuff and like she does put in a lot of work i don't mind paying her #but that's exactly what im fucking talking about like. #ppl can't afford to volunteer their time anymore and we all understand it!!! everything costs money for everyone! #like we didn't have to use to say ''do you mind paying me back for the stuff we ate'' #we used to be able to afford to feed our friends once in a while!!!

[writeouswriter]

My followers: And is this “writing” you’ve been “working on” in the room with us right now?

#writing #writeblr #writer things #writing humour #textpost #writing humor #relatable #funny #I genuinely am writing for the first time in a long while #but it’s uh it’s for an angst fanfic for a fandom one wouldn’t expect fic for necessarily #and I’m embarrassed but I’m not because it’s good but you’re never seeing it it’s between me and my ao3 when I finally do finish it #it’s at 6000 words but fr that’s the most I’ve written on a single thing in a long time and it’s still going! #last time I wrote/finished anything in forever was also for this fandom back in November <3 nature is healing #it’s slow going but I’m hoping to finish it before June 😭

[kingofmyborrowedheart]

Begging swifties to understand that Taylor didn’t write reputation and Lover with the knowledge of how the relationship was going to end and that trying to “excavate” those albums for evidence to prove a specific theory as to why it ended is not how they should be viewed. Taylor wrote those songs feeling a very specific way because that’s what she was experiencing and she is now reflecting on them with hindsight and relates to them differently than when she first created them. These conflicting emotions can exist; how she views it now doesn’t diminish how she felt about it when she first released it.

#taylor swift #don’t know if I’m expressing myself as properly and as articulate as I’d like #but both of the emotions she’s feeling about the songs can coexist #like little lover can still be a love song that’s what it was for her for a while #but she can also look back and say ‘oh maybe this wasn’t the best’ but it doesn’t void what it was originally #like I keep seeing things like oh she wrote this lyric in lover about him not showing up and it’s like no that’s not right #like yes you can see her underlying anxieties and fears in those songs because she was open about them #it doesn’t mean she predicted how it would end #there was a point in time where she thought this man was the one and would write about feeling that way

[lady-shadow-and-darkness]

Hear me out :

Teen Dazai and Chuuya going around finding every single arcade in the entire city and always having the very top two high scores in most of the games to the point where every single teen who has ever lived in Yokohama and has gone to any arcade is like "I don't know who the fuck Mackerel and Slug are but they're annoying."

#this is partly inspired by a Tumblr post thet I saw a while back. #A few years ago give or take. And also wrote a fic for. #OP if you're here can we share ideas please I am deprived #bungou stray dogs #dazai osamu #nakahara chuuya #soukoku #bsd headcanons

[ryssbelle]

Brozone reunion concepts for this little thing based on this ask

As stated in the ask idk fully how this moment would go, this concept was mostly building off the premise presented within the ask :D

Bonus:

#my art #trolls #dreamworks trolls #trolls 3 #trolls au #n2 au #trolls john dory #trolls clay #trolls poppy #trolls branch #trolls bruce #trolls floyd #brozone #look at them so silly #in the original script i had accidentally wrote John calling Bruce by his preferred name and i was like #he dont know it yet smh #and had to change it back to spruce #which is where the line 'its bruce but imma let it slide' #comes from #i dont think John in the movie and within this purposefully misnames him #i think its just like a force of habit #and its just harder for him to realize hes saying it wrong until hes corrected #cuz you see he doesnt really get mad when corrected he just gets confused the first time #and then just keeps forgetting after #which i think also was from his mindset of #'im the oldest im not allowed to change' so its like #his brains blocking out the change of spruce to bruce #this is unrelated to the comic as a whole it was just the on the spot thoughts i had while typing #but yeah #itd be a touching reunion for sure!

[stil-lindigo]

the dredger.

a comic about closure.

(buy the digital copy of the comic anthology here)

creative notes:

#i wrote my best stuff when i was at my very worst mentally #both RED and Patchwork Canary were written during an emotional pit #i struggled for a while. thinking about that #especially since those two came so easily to me back then and its so difficult to write anything like it these days #but i think id trade being happy over writing Only Bangers any day #closure #i made this comic series about the worst period of my mental health ever and now its over #its 10pm #and i dont know who i am #and thats fine. ill figure it out as i go. #thank you for reading #and thank you for your support #i promise my next project wont be as sad #stillindigo art #comic art #stillindigo comics

[salsakiyoomi]

"i want to get married."

iwaizumi's head snaps up at your statement his attention diverted from his phone to you and his brows furrow in confusion "what?"

"i want to get married." you repeat yourself again, leaning back against the couch cushions and throwing your legs over the armrest.

iwaizumi scoffs, a confused smile on his face "this is the last joke, right?" he questions, frowning down at you as you're looking up at him — it's a bit late into the afternoon, but too early for you to start saying nonsense since you've always been so adamant about not getting married.

you roll your eyes at him, "no." and iwaizumi's frown deepens, "are you okay?" he asks.

you scowl at him "the hell's that supposed to mean?"

he shrugs, his gaze turning back to his screen "just...you're being weird again."

"you're so rude and for what." you huff, rolling your eyes again, you cross your arms, now staring at the ceiling above, "i want to get married, haji."

"can't help you with that." he's still scrolling through his phone, not paying much mind to you.

"i want to have like, a las vegas wedding." you say, and iwaizumi turns off his phone — now you've captured his attention since he stares at you as if you've grown two head, you grin at his expression and iwaizumi assumes the worst — is it that you're suggesting you want to go to las vegas? it is only a four hour drive from california after all.

"a las vegas wedding?" iwaizumi questions as if making sure he heard you correctly.

"yeah like, you know, the ones in those casinos?" you gesture around with your hands as if to emphasize your point, "like i wanna throw on a white dress — but like, not the puffy ones, like a party dress, sequins and glitter one — or you know what, actually, a puffy dress would be awesome." you ramble on, iwaizumi's looking down at you, amused, "anyway, what i'm saying is that i wanna get absolutely hammered, throw on a white dress and get married in vegas."

iwaizumi snorts, "who you gonna get married to?"

"i don't know." you shrug, you reposition yourself now so that your head is laying in his lap and you look up at him, grinning mischievously, "you."

iwaizumi's eyes slightly widen, the tips of his ears turning pink and he groans, pushing you off of him, "you're so weird." he may have pushed you a little too hard that you fell off the couch with a dull thud.

he tries to ignore his skipped heartbeat as your laughter echoes through the living and iwaizumi's hand is curled at his mouth to hide his smile, "come on." you chide, "you know — say, we do get married in vegas, technically then, you'll only be married in vegas."

iwaizumi frowns, "that's not true, who told you that?" you're looking up at him with an entertained smile on your face, "you know, it's way too easy get married in vegas, right? why do you think so many people get married accidentally when they're drunk?"

iwaizumi scoffs, and leans back on the couch, arms crossed — it was a calm afternoon on his day off until you started on with your marriage shit, but unfortunately ( fortunately ) for him, you were his best friend, and roommate, so he had to put up with it, even if he has to pretend to be annoyed sometimes.

he says, "i really hope one day you'll finally mature enough that you stop saying weird shit all of the time."

you laugh, "you're just jealous you can't be as creative as me." iwaizumi rolls his eyes, watching as you get up from the ground and walk closer to him, too close actually that your face is right up his, "but it's fine, i'll get that vegas wedding one day."

you laugh, drawing back away from him and iwaizumi looks away, a slight blush tinting his cheeks, "yeah, dream on."

you hum in response, and with the way your gaze seems to be a bit too distant, iwaizumi assumes you've gone off on to your own little world now, you're no longer looking at him, instead staring at the tv that has a spanish show playing that neither of you understand, but he knows you're not listening when he mumbles a soft, "maybe even a real wedding." under his breath.

#the roommates to lovers agenda ♡ #yeah baby roommate iwa is back 💪💪 #finally wrote something for my beey biteable man i love him sm #y'all remember when ross and rachel got married in vegas while they were drunk and couldn't remember abt it in the morning #maybe i'll do a part two for this by that 💀 #haikyuu #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu drabbles #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu x reader #iwaizumi hajime #iwaizumi headcanons #iwaizumi drabbles #iwaizumi scenarios #iwaizumi fluff #iwaizumi imagine #iwaizumi x reader

[pencap]

they warned me that i cannot want you. mother told me wanting you would get me hurt. father told me wanting you would get me scarred. you told me wanting you would get me killed.

foolish heart, do you think i do not know? i have known from the moment that i laid eyes upon you and the devouring void in my chest woke up and named itself wanting and stretched and stretched and never stopped stretching that you would be the death of me.

foolish heart, i am not afraid.

it was always going to get me killed, this life of mine this life of yours this life of ours. and if you are going to be the death of me ( you are, you are, you are ) i would rather die for wanting you than die for hating you. i would rather die for the hope of having you than die for the fear of having you.

be my sun, my winds, my ocean and i will make myself icarus and i will find my joy in your blinding light and i will find my freedom in your touch and i will find my death in your waiting arms.

and you can melt me down like a candle under the flame or you can cast me about like a leaf in the skies or you can swallow me whole like a memory.

i will still be yours and wanting and wanting and wanting.

#spilled ink #poets on tumblr #poems on tumblr #writeblr #writers on tumblr #poetics #i feel like i wrote this in a fever dream #barely actually remember writing it #been in my drafts for a while finally remembered to clean it up and post #i am back to my “fuck titles” phase once more

[kudossi]

and a yellow moon glowed bright

Years later, when Ivypool herself is only a memory and before she’s completely lost to time, she’ll look over ThunderClan, wherever they might be, and still look for her daughter in every face.

The stories have it wrong already, and the truth will be dust before long. Bristlefrost isn’t alive in their memories. She’s twice-dead, drowned in black, choking water, a light snuffed out too soon. Bristlefrost was the prodigy — the daughter cats dreamed of, the first to find her voice and her paws, the leader of her siblings, the apprentice who did not graduate even earlier than she did because there was no prey in the forest to be found, not because of any failings on her part.

Cats starved, that long winter. Not Bristlefrost. Never her daughter, her clever, resourceful last-born. And she had once occupied this spot, designated for deputies, even though she’d never had an apprentice of her own. Would never have an apprentice of her own, now, even though she deserved it more than anything. Even though she’d deserved to stay deputy, but had given the role over with a smile, no hint of dark ambition in her gaze.

Ivypool steps into the deputy position under a brand-new leader with a whisper instead of a bang, the pounding of blood in her ears the only reminder that cats had been here before — that cats had died here before, and that Bramblestar’s first deputy becoming leader was a fluke, an odd quirk of fate. It hasn’t been done in living memory, nor long before that. Leaders do not usually step down, and when they do, they rarely stay with their Clan, or even within reach of their territory. First deputies do not often become leaders in turn. Usually this event is a bittersweet one, with a body or bodies laid out in the clearing, their eyes closed swiftly to avoid the rigor of after-death, but this is almost-peaceful, with only the murmurs of those who could not easily accept change as detractors.

Ivypool will die long before Squirrelstar. She’s—surprisingly okay with this, but she thinks she’s been at peace with her death since before Hollyleaf had stepped between her and a deathblow from one of the only friends she’d ever had.

(“You were my friend!” Ivypool screams in her worst nightmares, Hollyleaf’s blood dripping from her pelt.

“I was never anyone’s friend,” Hawkfrost murmurs in return, something aching-sad in his voice, Hollyleaf’s lifeless form pinned under his claws. “I was born to what I am. We’re the same, you and I.” He pushes the black cat away from his paws with disgust — not for the body, but for Ivypool herself. Blood bubbles from the horrible wound at the corpse’s throat. “She should have been the one,” he says sometimes, in the ones that shatter her already pieced-together heart. “She died in your place.”

“I know,” Ivypool says, and she does know — she knows it more than anyone else alive.)

“It should have been Hollyleaf,” she says to Squirrelstar, quietly, at the end of one of their dusk meetings.

Sorrow flashes in Squirrelstar’s gaze, but it’s buried as soon as it comes. “It’s you,” she says. “It has always been you.”

It is not a truth — not in the way Ivypool remembers them from her childhood — but it is not a lie, either. Hollyleaf chose her, in the way dying deputies might choose their successor. She is always an echo of another cat burned by starlight. It is a comfort, sometimes. In others, she begs the spirit who’d saved her life for mercy, for clemency, until she runs out of breath.

(“I’ll find her,” whispers a voice Ivypool had almost forgotten, in dreams she forgets as soon as she wakes. “I’ll walk the skies ceaselessly, I promise you.”

But there is no bringing Bristlefrost back, and a part of Ivypool has died with her.)

When Ivypool wakes, her Clanmates breathe around her, steadying her rabbit-quick heart. Fernsong’s tail wraps snugly around her flank, Thriftear curled only one nest behind, and she does not lose her breath at the way Flipclaw’s dark tabby stripes curl over his spine. She hasn’t in a long time, she knows, but the impulse is there, sharp as ice underneath her ribs.

(She’d once thought his brown tabby pelt a punishment from the stars. She loves her son, would give her life for him, but the feeling that StarClan may have meted some punishment down in the shade of his pelt remains long after he’s received his warrior name.

She’d begged Bramblestar to give him a suffix that was as unassumingly kind and silly as her son always was. Instead he’d given him -claw, as if to remind her of her failings. She is not sorry to see his form slip into the elders’ den, bereft of the nine lives he’d once so jealously hoarded.)

#ivypool #thunderclan #bristlefrost #squirrelflight #squirrelstar #brambleclaw #bramblestar #flipclaw #thriftear #fernsong #waca #warrior cats #wc #wc fic #thunder spoilers #ivypool's heart #i wrote this a while back and then the erins punched me through a brick wall with that super edition announcement #and i have to wonder if they're using 'heart' because they're trying to erase the OTHER 'heart' #which. yeah. yeah. #crazy how that works #work in progress #if they fridged a woman to fridge another woman i'm going to riot

[poemsonmars]

grief is fucking terrifying.

it covers everything in

such a massive layer of pain.

of confusion. of rage.

i can't breathe through it.

one minute i'm sitting in

my childhood bedroom

and the next, i can't see.

i wave my hand in front of my face

and no one greets me in return.

i don't know who i am without her.

-mars

#1/16/23 #the ones about heartbreak #mars.poetry #my poetry #lgbt poetry #original poetry #sad poetry #poetry about grief #poets on tumblr #original poem #spilled ink #spilled thoughts #button poetry #prose poetry #writeblr #poetscommunity #perhaps i wrote this while think about natasha and yelena. and what about it #coming back with the jackieshauna brainrot to say holy shit this is so Them #choose your fighter i guess

[popponn]

a cushion, two continents away. [isagi yoichi x reader]

note: i wrote this in one sitting out of need. a loving yoichi is a warm thought and while this isn't how i imagined the 'first fit of madness in a while' would go, please do know it is one. yoichi is considerate, but yoichi likes affection. that's the thought. warning: none, isagi is full of love and wants to be clingy, post canon pro player au, reader's gender unspecified.

“Please motivate me,” you say to the screen. Isagi tries his best not to ask why you are burying your face in your hands instead of greeting him with a smile. His hunch tells him you might cry if he does that. “Please motivate me, or I might cry.”

Isagi really tries his best not to follow his instinct to ask are you okay there and then. With a smile he hopes doesn’t come out as an exact grimace, he laughs and makes a silent note to order you your favorite drink online later. Paying mind to his sleeping teammates, he whispers, “I don’t know what’s happening here, but hang in there, okay?”

As if being cued by his voice, you finally peek at his face. Even with only part of your face unhidden by your palms, Isagi notices that you are making a face at something—which is probably whatever your workload is now and the fact that he is two continents away from you.

“Why are you away?” you ask, a mix of pout and annoyance haunting your voice, “I want to work while sitting in your lap. I want a back hug. I want a hug. I want you here.”

“Please don’t turn me into a cushion,” Isagi says, even though the two of you know that he will do it happily and readily. Complete with his head on your shoulder, peering at your laptop. Probably, also while sharing warm drinks with you.

Good—Isagi holds back a groan. Now he wants to go home too.

Which shouldn’t be impossible. The match is done, Bachira and Rin are asleep so they can’t snitch, maybe if he runs to the airport now—

“I’m going to sound like a hypocrite. And also this is painful for me to say,” you interrupt his train of thought with a mock of a strict expression, “but please don’t.”

Isagi chews the inside of his cheek, “…but. It’s—”

“I’m not listening to you,” you cut off, despite obviously trying to hold back a smile. But, as quick as that pretty expression of yours comes, Isagi doesn’t get much time to admire it. You soon turn away to somewhere off-screen, facing what seems to be your work with a sigh. “…now, I think I have to go.”

Looking at you and hearing the imminent farewell, Isagi wants to make you stay more than anything. Having a simple celebration between you and him, even through a video call, after a win sounds like heaven. But of course, unfortunately, he is mature enough to know asking that from you is impossible for now.

But, Isagi is self-aware. He is egoistic and stubborn when he wants something. So, he asks, “Can we stay on call? I will be good.”

“…be good, huh?” you parrot his wording. A light chuckle comes out just barely from you.

“You know what I mean,” Isagi shifts on his bed. Lying on his side while hugging his pillow to his body, pretending it’s you. He buries his face into the plush cotton. God—he really wishes this pillow was you now.

Never once did his eyes leave you. He watches as you stay silent, considering for a moment. Then, finally, after a few wordless moments, you finally glance back to him, “…you know I can’t deny that puppy look, right?”

“Stop calling it puppy look,” Isagi denies. He knows he is wearing the expression you often call ‘pouting’.

To that, you finally laugh out loud. For a moment you truly look like there is no burden on you and Isagi considers going on with the pointless debate if he could keep that good look on you forever. Sadly, he knows you should work the moment you fully turn your face to the side. The clicking sounds of keyboards and mouse clicks replace your voice.

“Sure, sure, I will,” you say. Isagi merely hums as he looks at you.

He really should be a good boyfriend and pretend he is your sitting cushion right now.

#bllk imagines #bllk x reader #bllk #blue lock fluff #blue lock #blue lock x reader #blue lock scenarios #bllk fluff #isagi yoichi x reader #bllk isagi #isagi x reader #isagi yoichi #blue lock isagi #isagi x you #blue lock imagines #bllk scenarios #drabbles #this isn't what i thought my first oneshot in a while will be but here we are. and i need isagi #wrote this out of need. i will check this again once i got time. now back to w0rk ue ue ue. when you see this im probably neck deep in one; #also yoichi is considerate but yoichi likes affection truly is a thought #i will miss yapping about yoichi;;;;

[raineandsky]

#112

Villainy is at an all time low. It’s practically non-existent, and with it, the villains.

Heroes have tried hunting them down. Searched every corner of the city, every abandoned building, every dark alleyway. Something’s going on.

The agency is humming with nervous energy. Something’s happening. This is on purpose. The villains are in hiding because they’re planning something big. Where are they all? We have to stop them. They have to be somewhere.

The villains are gone for so long, the agency strung so high, the place practically explodes when a pair of heroes happen across one on their usual jaunt around the city.

The hero is in the midst of buying a coffee when they come through the doors with bright smiles and cheers of victory. The villain flails between them, screaming bloody murder, as other heroes crowd around with questions and praises. You found one? Where were they? What’s going on? Have they said anything? This is a good sign. Good job, guys. The start of the end.

The heroes continue through with their prize, others following them like a cape of praise and cheers, and the hero gets a chance to glance at the villain. A familiar face. One of the ones the hero saw frequently in the field, one they’re well acquainted with. Of course.

The superhero throws them into an interrogation room not even fifteen minutes later. The hero’s coffee is still half-full. Might as well play the optimist, considering the situation.

One of the same heroes as before brings the villain in. The villain is, to put it lightly, rabid. The hero can see the scratches on the other hero’s arms, though he doesn’t seem to mind. He’s still too busy basking in everyone’s praise to care.

“Be careful,” he says cheerfully as he wrestles the villain into the chair opposite. “This one goes for the eyes.”

The villain’s never done that to the hero on the streets. Something’s going on, they can agree with that, but something’s changed.

The other hero steps back with a grin as the villain snaps at him, teeth bared like an animal, and with a quick thumbs up to the hero he turns on his heel and leaves them alone with the villain.

Rage is not an emotion the villain has ever expressed outwardly. Anger, sure, but not quite this raw. They yank their hands desperately to try and free themselves, the chair they were put in already tipped over. The table jolts with the force, and the hero’s half-full coffee tips over and onto the floor.

The hero can only think to watch. They’re not going to get anything out of them like this. They’ll wait for the villain for them to tire themself out.

After ten long minutes, it’s clear that isn't an option. Where are they getting all this energy from? They’ve been in the agency before, back when they were amateur enough to get caught, and they were never this frantic. They sat quietly, answered the questions the hero threw at them, and casually broke themself out that same night.

“[Villain]—”

“Let go of me!”

The villain’s breath is haggard, their arms shaking with the effort, but they haven’t stopped. The hero’s confusion is turning into worry incredibly fast.

“[Villain],” they try, carefully, tentatively. “Where is everyone?”

The villain’s eyes snap up to them like they’re seeing them for the first time. The first thing the hero notices is that it’s not rage in their face—it’s terror.

The hero holds their hands out pacifically. “You’re okay,” they continue. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

The fear gets quickly masked by a layer of hatred. “Let go of me.”

The words come out calmer, quieter—seething. The villain looks like they’d break the hero in half given the opportunity. “Let go of me,” they repeat—and then, a little softer, “you have to.”

The hero’s heart pulls. A hint. Something to go off.

“Why would I do that?”

The villain’s pulling has slowed, their entire body leaning back against their cuffs. They sag slightly, exhausted, their eyes dropped to the table. “You have to.”

Less helpful a second time. The hero gets to their feet, glancing at the mirror to the side of the room. “I’m going to take them back,” they tell it, to the superhero inevitably on the other side. “We’re not getting anything out of them today.”

“No!” The villain cringes away when the hero reaches for them like they’re coming at them with a knife, and they almost throw themself back to their frenzy. “Don’t touch me!”

The villain kicks a foot out and misses, thankfully, as the hero cautiously edges into their space. The hero reaches forwards to detach the villain’s cuffs from the table, and as if the action makes something crack, the villain lets out a grief-stricken sob.

The hero steps back before they can stop themself, alarmed. The villain turns their face away with another choke of a cry, pushing themself as far away from the hero as the table will allow. “Let go of me,” they say again, but it’s not angry anymore. It sounds defeated. Scared.

The hero moves past them and they lurch back like they're contagious, watching nervously as the hero carefully sets the chair back upright. “Sit down,” the hero says gently.

They nudge the chair towards the villain. The villain stares at it for a moment, letting the first streaks of tears paint their face, before they give in and sit. The single motion is laboured, tired—how long have they been fighting back for?

“If you tell me what’s going on,” the hero prompts carefully, “we might be able to think about letting you go.”

“N– No, I have to go now. Before it’s too late.” Another hint, another step in the right direction. The hero glances at the mirror.

“That isn’t an option, [Villain], you know that.” The hero settles back in their own chair. “If you tell us what’s happening, though, we might be able to help you.”

The villain shakes their head shortly. “I can’t,” they mumble, and it comes out entirely heartbroken.

“Well,” the hero starts slowly, “let’s start with what you can tell us.”

The villain hesitates, but after a moment they nod, slight, barely perceivable. The hero nods too—a step in the right direction. The first hint in the giant puzzle that is everything.

#creative writing #writblr #writers on tumblr #writing #writing community #heroes and villains #hero x villain #it feels like agesssss since i wrote something this long #and i missed it!!! feel like im stretchin me legs after a long time #and yes i posted something p long a lil while back. i wrote that after this lmao

[inkskinned]

not to romanticize my mental issues but sometimes having adhd is very useful because today during a meeting that could have been an email i kept thinking about crabs wearing small tophats and having little dancing parties and how they'd sound in tap shoes.

and when my boss was like "raquel what do you think?"

i was like "well, i think the others have made good points about this, of course, and i'd be happy to circle around later on it, but i'd love to take a moment and resonate with this before offering my own suggestion. i want to hear what others think before anticipating the client's needs."

and then i went back to not listening but this time it was imagining snails that joust.

#me: hehe funny #the hatemail: you should be fired immediately the fact you are scum enough to NOT LISTEN #in a SINGLE MEETING #that was about a project you DONT WORK ON #means that you are EVIL and SUCKING UP TIME #like bro .... idk how to tell u this sometimes people be in meetings they don't need to be in #i only got asked to participate bc there's an element of the project that resembles #a piece i wrote a while back #and i know this element exists bc #we've already had a meeting where i told them what i did how i did it and what i suggest #so there's nothing else for me to add really #also im close with all the coworkers who are working on that element #and they just gchat me their questions #idk how to tell u this but someone zoning out in a single 30 minute meeting where they LITERALLY #don't work on that project ? #that's just fucking anti-capitalism baby #i was being a revolutionary

[mcondance]

something about apartment steven..

he's most comfortable in his apartment so he just lounges around in shirts where his chest pokes through and sweats that you can so easily see his cock pressing through when he gets hard - which is all the time. living with you has him on edge.

he likes fucking you everywhere, literally. against the door, in his shower, against the bookshelf; but in front of his mirror is his favorite place. cause then he can watch himself fuck you stupid, watch his fat cock ruin your pretty cunt, from 3 different angles.

“oh, god, ‘s so pretty, look so good with me inside you.” he murmurs against your ear, head resting on your shoulder, his eyes focused on where his leaking cock disappears into your messy cunt, your leg held up by his hand.

and it's so addicting, fucking you everywhere in his apartment. he looks at it like marking your territory, like splitting you open all over his apartment consummates the space as both his and yours.

#mcon imagines {💭} #steven grant smut #moon knight smut #steven grant x reader #i wrote this in my priv twt account a while back #soooo here it is! #steven grant x black reader #i needa fuck him in his apartment brah. #moon knight x black reader

[sprout-fics]

Homecoming

(Simon 'Ghost' Riley x OFC 'Fix')

Snowblind Masterlist

Rating: M Wordcount: 3.8k Tags: Whump, Angst, Fluff, Post-torture, Post-rescue, Established relationship, Living together, Domesticity, Non sexual intimacy Warnings: References of torture, starvation, captivity A/N: Part of 'For Once In Our Lives' on AO3

It’s five in the morning when Simon pulls the car up to his flat.

Your flat too, but still his, technically. Your name, like his, isn’t on the lease. If anything it’s Price’s, his official signature on the document so as to avoid collecting a paper trail for his lieutenant. Despite that, it’s been your space together for most of the year now. Your presence is written in the curtains that hang neatly in the front window, the pitcher of kitchen utensils on the counter behind the coffee maker. You’ve staked you claim on a section of the bathroom counter upstairs, taken advantage of the corners of the shower to deposit half empty bottles of shower supplies you hardly ever get use with the amount of time you’re deployed. The couch in the living room was your idea, a replacement for the terrible worn thing that had tormented your spine in the evenings you’d spent sleeping on it, before you were allowed in his bedroom.

You left traces of yourself, whispers, small hushed murmurs that cling to his skin in the weeks you were gone. In your absence Simon had sought you there, had waited and prayed for the smallest blip of life on a radio that had long gone silent.

Eighteen days. Two weeks and roughly one hundred hours from the time you went dark to the time you’d been rescued.

Your captors had starved you, tortured you, beaten you bloody and left you to fester before returning for more. You’d gone through interrogation training with Price’s supervision, and you had been prepared from the moment you’d stepped off the plane for no man’s land for the capture that might, and did, ensue.

Nothing had prepared you for the return home.

Simon exits the driver’s side door fluidly just as you stir from your drowsy state, blinking wearily up at the flat beyond the garden gate. The windows are dark and shuttered, closed off, and it feels aching somehow, lonely. The dim, hazy light of dawn tucks dusky shadows around the corners of the townhouse, softly blue and patient, waiting for your return.

You open the door to your side, withholding a wince at the motion of your torn shoulder. Yet Simon is already there, hands reaching for you before you can protest. Normally you would, too stubborn to allow anyone else, especially him, to do things for you. Now, when Simon lifts you into his arms you say not a word. The walk to his car from the infirmary had been exhausting enough, atrophied muscles screaming with each step, too weak from the weeks you’d spent in hospital care. So you lift your good arm around his neck, brace yourself there and tuck the crown of your head under his jaw in a silent gesture of comfort to you both.

Simon is quiet as he walks up the steps, chest rising with slow, measured breaths as he balances the weight of you in his arms. You’re not sure how he manages to get the front door open, and if you weren’t...as you are now you probably would have made a wry comment about his dexterous hands. Instead it’s silent between you both, with the weight of the things that have happened weighing too heavy on your fraught souls.

You’re deposited on the couch that no longer smells like you while Simon fetches your bag from the car. In the time it takes him you manage to look around the apartment, witness the devastation your absence has caused.

Half eaten MRE foils litter the dusty coffee table. Beneath them are maps of Serbia, and you trace the marked coordinates of your last known location, notes scribbled in slanting writing that indicates sleeplessness. An empty tumbler sits to the far edge, a thin circle of amber at the bottom betraying his taste for bourbon. The room is unkempt, like he’d bumped into things and never bothered to pick them up. In the far corner: A knife wedged into the wall. The spare one you’d left behind.

The front door closes, and in the echo heavy bootsteps draw your attention to the large, looming figure that enters your line of view.

“How’s the pain?” Simon asks, and when you look up to his eyes you can’t tell the shadows there apart from his war paint.

You catalog the various aches and pains left even after your medical discharge. A broken shoulder that’s still mending. Stitches on the meat of your upper thigh, a dark slice across your collarbone above your two broken ribs, a fractured fibula that may leave you with a permanent limp unless you adhere to the PT instructions sternly given to you.

Yet the look in Simon’s eyes is different as it plucks a tender, grieving chord inside your chest. Tired, blank, hiding the rot you know is there, the rot he refuses to show you.

“It’s fine.” You almost say on instinct, but catch yourself before you can. It’s a lie, one he won’t appreciate, not here. Not now.

“How much more am I allowed to have?” You ask, and before you can finish the words Simon is fishing through your bag for the discharge papers, scanning them with his back turned before reaching back inside for a small orange canister. He vanishes in the direction of the kitchen and reappears just as swiftly with a tall glass of water that you finish along with the medication.

There’s a pause then, and once more your eyes look up to peer at him under his mask. There’s a sunkenness to his gaze that whispers of the dark grip of insomnia, a gaunt sort of coloring that you’re able to see despite the ink around his eyes.

“Is there anything in the cabinets?” You ask, and your voice seems so loud in the silence between you. “To eat?”

Once more he’s off, striding in the direction of the kitchen without a word. You hear the click of the stove, the cabinets being rifled through, and then quiet as Simon sets about making something.

After several minutes you get up to follow him, mouth parting in a silent, wheezing cry as the pain of putting pressure down on your booted calf. Yet you bite down on any wounded noises, clutching the wall and crossing the foyer to come stand on the threshold of the kitchen.

He didn’t even turn the lights on.

You do, and it makes him cast a small glance over his shoulder, the sturdy frame of him obscuring whatever he’s making on the stove.

“You shouldn’t be standing.” He tells you, voice low in his chest with a familiar rumble. “Sit.”

“You left me alone.” You try to joke, but it has no effect. He doesn’t even seem to register it, acting automatically in cooking whatever it is he’s poking at with a wooden spoon.

So you see yourself to the tiny kitchen table beneath the front window with the curtains still closed. As you wait, you study his back, the way Simon is postured. There’s a tightness to his shoulders, a coiled uncertainty that’s weighed down only by fatigue. The soft, dark, familiar cloth of his hoodie stretches across the planes of his shoulders, having shrunk from one too many times in the wash. The sleeves are rolled up halfway, exposing the dark swirling ink of his forearm on his left side. You trace the images there, of bombs and broken bones and viscera that you thought yourself would be a part of weeks ago in the dark shed they’d kept you in.

It’s similar, in a way. The slant of light that cuts through the curtains reminds you of the pale illumination that peeked between the gaps of wood of your cold cell with the dirt floor and the cold, cold earth beneath your exposed form. In the silence between you both, it feels like a different sort of prison, both of you captive to your own thoughts of the things that happened, and that which didn’t.

Simon turns at last with something red and simmering in a bowl- tomato soup, by the smell. It instantly makes your mouth water, pallet tired of the bland hospital food served to you for weeks now, interrupted only by the snacks Gaz and Soap had smuggled past your nurse. It takes restraint to allow it to cool, and as it does Simon slides into the chair across from you, his side of the table noticeable empty.

“You’re not going to eat?” You ask quietly.

“No.” Comes the almost instant reply.

You feel your expression fall as he watches you before he adds on: “Later.”

It’s as good as you’re going to get for now, and you’re much too tired to press him on it. So you set about slowly sipping your soup, letting the warmth curl in your empty belly. There’s an anxious sort of grumble there, body still too taxed to have anything more complicated than this you think. He knows, you’re sure, has been in the same chair you’re in trying to take care of himself in the aftermath of it all.

Alone.

The warmth sours in your stomach.

Simon watches the expression pass over your face silently, observing. Watching, as he always does, taking in every minute detail and storing it for some unknown study in his thoughts you’re rarely privy to.

You finish the soup despite the lingering bitterness at the back of your senses, swallowing down the touch of nausea from your painkillers and looking to the man across from you.

Silent. Still. Unmoving, like the dead.

You reach out across the table, set your hand atop his gloved one, and Simon startles.

There’s a glazed look in his eyes that doesn’t fully dissipate as he looks at you, and in return you offer him a shaky sort of smile.

“Simon.” You whisper, and it draws him back just a little more, eyes unblinking but still something a little less than empty. Not fully here with you, caught in the tormentous spiral of what if’s that settle heavy over you both.

“Where are you?” You ask, voice a breathy murmur.

It seems to shake something loose from him, your hushed inquiry, drawing him back to himself and out of the coffin of his mind. He’s silent for a few moments, just staring back at you, and you watch as his eyes clear, as he’s able to see you again.

“Not goin’ anywhere.” He tells you, and overturns his hand to gently clasp at your hand atop his. “Fix.”

You smile, finally, feeling some of the weight ease from your shoulders, and you squeeze his hand back in reassurance.

“Still with me?” You ask quietly in the dim morning light of your apartment, and Simon blinks slow before offering a little nod.

“Always.”

Always. With you.

Simon leaves the dishes in the sink as he helps you up the stairs one step at a time, gingerly making your way to the bathroom adjacent to the bedroom. He sits you atop the toilet seat as he runs the bath, and when you grumble about lifting your sore arm he merely grunts in reply, acknowledging of your griping in a gruff, familiar way that eases the bitterness lingering on your tongue.

He helps divest you of your clothes, and you try not to feel self conscious of the new scars that litter your skin. He traces them with nimble fingers and glancing touches, hovering over each one meaningfully and with great purpose. It’s as if he’s re-memorizing the shape of you, the touch of your skin with freshly healed lacerations and trials of stitches that embark a pathway under his hands.

“Fix.” He says again, softly, and it sounds reverent somehow, worshiping a cracked altar damaged by those who sought your demise. He remains at the foot of it, face upturned into the light that streams through the slats of the broken shed that held you captive and allowing the glow of revelation to stream onto his open eyes.

Later, once you two have mended yourself to each other once more, you’ll ask him if you’re still beautiful. He’ll say yes without question, fervent with a desire so raw it peels marrow away from his bones, strips the sinew bare from his flesh just so he has one more thing to offer you. You’ll get the same answer every time you ask him, and each time the silent question of “Do you still love me despite everything?” will echo soundlessly in your chest.

To which he too, answers: Yes.

He settles into the too-small bathtub behind you, and you shudder at the skin to skin contact that feels so foreign after being so far away from him for so long. The broad drum of his chest braces against your back as he takes his time bathing your tired, weary limbs. You settle into him easily with a sigh, allow him to scrub you free of the sterile touch of the hospital wing, the smell of antiseptic vanishing beyond a haze of fragrant bubbles from your too many bottles of soap. Beneath it is the smell of him, the thick and heavy weight of his musk that you crane towards with a small groan, bumping your nose under his jaw to drag in a breath of him.

“Alright?” He asks, pausing, and you nod into his collarbone, dopey and sated. It releases a little bit more tension from his shoulders, and you feel it in the way his chest depresses, burying yourself there in all the space he’ll allow you.

Which is, to say, all of him.

“I dreamt of you.” You say suddenly, and he pauses as he bends over you, one strong hand grasping the underside of your thigh to haul it upwards to wash. You almost don’t realize you spoke, eyes closed and body loose in the warm, sudsy water.

“I dreamt we went back to the states.” You go on, voice a soft murmur, slurred with fatigue now that you unwind softly into his arms. “We bought a big plot of land in the mountains where nobody could find us, with an old cabin and a fireplace.”

Simon pauses a moment longer before giving an answering hum, resuming his task and minding your stitches with gentle precision.

“Would have to chop a lot of wood.” He offers mildly.

“We took turns.” You reply, head lolling against his chest. You slip just an inch down, and one strong arm loops around your middle to keep you from descending further. “We got chickens too, and a cranky old barncat. I planted tomatoes in the vegetable garden.”

Simon is quiet as you ramble, allowing your thoughts to trickle free like the gentle loosening of a stream after a winter’s frost. He envelops you, warms you through, and in the beautiful blossom of your mind you allow the inside of your heart to be laid bare to him.

“Price and the boys came to visit. I made chicken soup.”

“With our chickens?”

You make a wounded little noise at that, and you feel him almost mistake it for a sound of pain.

“We watched the fireflies in the summertime.” You go on. “Stayed up to watch the sunrise just because. I can still see the colors beyond the trees.”

Pale pink and blue. The same colors that bleed through your curtains, the same colors that had slanted over your face in your would be tomb, allowing you the barest glimpse of freedom.

You swallow then, throat suddenly thick with tears. Like the trickle of a stream, your words pour gently out of you until they flood your eyes all at once, chest seizing with a pained breath as you shudder.

“Every day.” You croak, and he’s stopped now, bent over you as you tremble against him, hot tears seeping into the bath water. “Every day I dreamt of you. The whole time I was there. From the moment I fell asleep until the moment I woke up.”

Simon is silent, tucking you to him, stroking a heavy hand over the chilling flesh of your upper arms, allowing you to dig deep into him like he’s the only thing that will hold you.

“I knew you’d come for me. I never once thought you wouldn’t. The whole time I couldn’t stop thinking of you because I knew you’d come find me. I knew you wouldn’t let me go.”

He whispers your name then, your real name, and you hear in his voice the way he trembles through it, as if he’s somehow not allowed. Simon whispers your name like a hymn he’s unfamiliar with, a grace given to him by your endless adoration. You feel it crack in your chest with a cry, swallow down the pain just so the despair, the hurt, the relief surges through you in wet, broken gasps. There’s no longer any words. Instead there’s the shudder of you both as you fold into each other, as he holds you like he can never bear to part from you in his arms again.

There’s so many things you want to say, so many things you wish you could tell him. You want to say you were so scared he’d find your body, that you wouldn’t survive the trip back to base, that he wouldn’t recognize the person that came back to him. You want to tell him that you were scared he’d be so terrified of how deeply you’d consumed his soul that he’d leave you, that losing you that way was better than losing the whole of you to something he couldn’t stop.

You want to tell him you felt the same, that you almost wish he had left you so that someday, should you lose each other, it would somehow hurt less.

Instead now, you cry into his arms and silently beg for him to hold you just a little longer.

You’re not sure how or when you get to the bed, wrapped up in a towel and bare as you lay on your side quietly crying. He doesn’t disappear from you, merely takes you against him and tucks himself impossibly further around you, as if shielding you from your own fears and phantoms.

“Fix.” He whispers, a hand roaming your back as your breathing eventually evens out.

You cling to him, wet skin and all, drinking in his scent, leeching off his warmth and imbuing it in your wounded form. He shifts, tilts you up so you look into his face, free of his mask, wet blonde lashes clinging to his cheeks with every flutter of his eyes. The full range of grief plays out clearly on his face, a despair and a longing so deep that you feel dirt pour over the coffin where both of you are entwined.

“I’ll come for you.” He tells you, voice dark, an ominous, dangerous rumble of a distant storm threatening to consume the horizon. “Every time. There’s nothing in the whole fucking world that can keep me from finding you, Fix.”

You nod wordlessly at him, face scrunching with unshed tears, breath shuddering in the hollow of your chest where he resides.

He takes a breath of his own then, eyes wide before he speaks.

“When they took you to the chopper, I went back.” He confesses. “Price tried to stop me, but I couldn’t leave after what they did to you.”

You shudder to think of the sight that must have been- with Ghost as a wild, feral animal seeking blood, unable to be tamed by the man he trusted the most, seeking out vengeance just to cool the bloodlust raging beneath his skin. Disregarding your injured state at the hands of the other medics, instead taking one look at your crumpled form and feeling a fury so violent it clouded his unwavering judgment in the field.

“I killed all of them.” Simon tells you, and there’s no regret in his voice, no horror at his own actions. A cold, calculating killer fueled by the most terrifying of motivations. “I felt their bones break beneath my hands, how hot and wet their blood was. I carved out their brains and left them for the vultures but it wasn’t enough. I’d kill them a hundred times over if I had the chance.”

You know he would. It should scare you, the lengths this man has gone through to keep you here in his arms. It should terrify you, should make you reconsider all viable possibility of being with him. Yet you fail to even feign shock at the devotion he has for you, laying skulls at your feet just so you can tell him how much you trust him, how much he deserves you- as if you somehow deserve him too.

“When I saw you on that hospital bed...” He goes on, voice softer now, a tone reserved just for you. “The only thing I could think was that I...I could never lose you again.”

“Never.” You tell him, clutching at the arm encircling you to him with ardent fixation. “You’re not going to lose me. I’m going to wait for you each time because I know you’ll come. Even if it means going through it all again, I’ll stay alive just to come back to you.”

You kiss him then, slow and tender, and he shivers bodily into you before surging forward, lips catching yours, body pressing into you as he kisses you like he’d forgotten the taste. Simon kisses you like its the last thing he’ll ever do, like he want to carry the touch of you from one afterlife into the next, like he’s trying to ingrain the sensation of you against his scarred flesh in case you’re ever taken from him again.

“Simon...” You sigh, and he swallows the sound like he’s trying to drink in every breath, as if it’s just one more taste of you.

“I’ll kill anyone who tries to keep you away from me.” He swears coarsely into your mouth. “I can’t- can’t do this without you. You make it all so fucking bearable, Fix. Nobody else can have you.”

You don’t want anyone else. You want him.

“I love you, Simon.” You manage between kisses, the naked, damp planes of your bodies stuck together as he tangles himself inside of you further, so that you’ll never be able ti dislodge him even if you wanted to. “I love you.”

“You’re mine, Fix.” He tells you in return, and you know what it means even though he won’t say it. “I won’t let them take you.”

You know he won’t. In this lifetime, in the next, you’ll stand by his side. You’ll bathe in the darkness of him so ichor drips from your lips, so that your name is seared across his tongue as if it’s the last word he’ll ever speak. You’ll echo a prayer unto his violence and he will kneel at the altar of you once more and ask for a redemption you can’t offer. Instead, you’ll tumble down into the grave together, caught in each other’s arms just like this, the world be damned.

You’ll wait. He’ll come for you. Then you’ll go home and watch the sun rise.

Tag List: (Reblog this post to be added to future fics from this series! If you'd like to be removed please DM me!)

@dankest-farrik @zwiiicnziiix @moondirti @sritashimada @ladiilokii @yeyinde @sandinthemachine @verdandis-blog @guyfieriiii @fan-of-encouragement @starlitnotes @rentaldarling @mockerycrow @atenceladusiaawfytbwb @tinykaka @dumb-djarin @homicidal-slvt @soapskneebrace @selinn777 @nachtcirce @jujubashow @mutuallimbenclosure @kkinky @trash-boi-4-life @scatter-mind001 @alittlefansthings @allaboutirem0 @keiva1000 @makariaspresence @achelois-is-here @nightingale-ghost-writer @altered-delta @thetimidsarcasticcat @nestaarcheronss @bitchykittenconnoisseur @ghxstyops @whotfislynn @gazs-blue-hat @obi-wansorrow @liltofu99 @thatswhyilovetheghost @devilsfoodcake22 @dumb-fawkin-bitch @hlo-kty @children-of-epiales @definitelyanonymous @queenquazar @alicesfracturedmirror

#simon ghost x reader #simon riley x reader #simon riley x oc #simon ghost riley x oc #simon ghost riley #ignore how unbetad this is #and also not entirely satisfied with the way I wrote Simon but hey #I'm getting back into the groove of things so I'm cutting myself some slack #Also credit to that one anon from a while back with the 'you make it all so bearable' line #I haven't forgotten and ily

[mae-i-scribble]

tonight i was thinking about orv’s theme about how yjh as a character, and to a larger extent people, will in some ways always be unknowable. (orv spoilers following, read at your own risk)

i feel like i’ve seen a few posts on here that somewhat take this theme to an extreme, leaning *hard* into that “kdj doesn’t actually know yjh like at all” which while on the right track, i feel completely misses the point. Orv goes out of its way to showcase that kdj actually understands yjh to a scary degree, even once they’re out of the early scenarios and the gap between kdj’s knowledge and yjh’s personhood grows larger, there are still things about yjh that *only* kdj can fundamentally understand. And I don’t think that the novel does anything to discredit that understanding, only says that there is much more to yjh. In the same manner, even if you’ve known someone for years, spent all your time with them, there can and will always be new things for you to learn about them. The danger that orv speaks of is trusting in that assumption, that your understanding will be enough and you don’t have to keep an eye out for more developments. That the person you know will forever stay the same. And this isn’t a kdj problem either, fundamentally a lot of the big disagreements that happen between kdj and yjh in the latter half of the novel are born from both of them misconstruing what the other is thinking, trusting that their understanding of the other is deep enough to base their judgements off of. (Post first murim destruction, divorce arc, yjh thinking kdj scattered his soul on purpose, etc.)

As always with orv’s themes, we can view it in a meta sense as well. Kdj’s understanding of yjh as a character is so complete that it’s nearly flawless- until the story begins to deviate and a yjh grows outside the parameters that kdj’s judgements are based on. Even before then, there was always more to yjh- but as readers, we can only understand a character as much as we see them. What you come away with from a story is your complete understanding, there is no growth outside of those boundaries because then it wouldn’t be an understanding of *that* character, you would be putting your own ideas and such into it. But talk to another person, and suddenly the same character you understand so clearly becomes someone else. Talk to the author, and they say something completely different. And can one truly claim to understand a character when the story will never talk about them in every conceivable way? What does it take to truly understand such a thing? Learning that 1863rd round hsy wrote ways of survival with such limited resources and knowledge on who yjh even is, and yet despite it all, still manages to write a story that captures so much of his essence. As orv readers, we know it isn’t everything- it could never encapsulate all of yjh, but the idea that even when one knows nearly nothing, you can still put on a facade of understanding.

We can get into a chicken or the egg argument with this, as 1863!hsy dictates how yjh acts with her writing, and that yjh in the 1863rd round is the one she comes to know before ever starting this story, but when it comes to this theme of the unknowable in the people around us, I don’t think this sort of debate is worth much. We know that yjh exists outside the story written, and how much of him is determined by hsy’s writing is negligible because no matter what, he always grows beyond it. Whether as 1864 or secretive plotter, it all comes back to that same point of there is always more to see within a person.

I don’t know quite where I want to go with this, only that I wanted an outlet for some of these thoughts inside my head, but one of the best things about this theme for me is how it answers itself. When the people around you become unrecognizable, what should you do? And orv says to reach out. To try. To understand. Kdj loses access to omniscient reader several times but always, always gains it back in orv (as far as i remember), because at the end of the day, he is not someone who stays trapped in his idea of who he knows yjh to be. Yjh too, even at the end of orv, is trying to learn more and more about kdj. Only when you are willing to hear out the other person, to learn about them every day, does this unknowable aspect become something less daunting.

#orv #omniscient reader #omniscient readers viewpoint #kim dokja #yoo joonghyuk #joongdok #meta #analysis #it just kinda ended up kdj and yjh focused because this is what the theme is most applicable too #i wish i had more thoughts on how 1863 wrote WoS bc that definitely fits in here more than what i said about it #i think too it can be applied to ysa and kdj #while not as relevant as it is with yjh since their relationship doesnt stretch back as far #they still spend so much of this novel learning more and more about each other #compared to back at minosoft where at least to me it looked like they already had an idea of who the other was as a person #so sorry if this is disjointed i need to stop writing meta as 3 am #in my defense its the only time my thoughts come out like this #on the verge of sleep #orv spoilers #omniscient reader spoilers #i forgot them early on my bad