#christmas music on and singing along and baking and i never could do much in my apartment bc of it being so small etc | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

chaoswithkaycee · 1 year

Text

Hellfire and Honeysuckle, Chapter Ten

Synopsis: A new girl has moved to Hawkins after the events of the hospital attack, with her own story and her own secrets. She's passionate about many things - her education, baking, friendship, kindness - and ready to finally make friends after a lifetime of running from place to place.

Warnings: Jokes about alcohol, discussion of losing virginity, mushy fluffy junk about falling in love, discussion of an American holiday (Thanksgiving - let me add here that I am well aware of how problematic it is, which is why I do not celebrate it - Honey, however, as a young girl in the 80's who does not have access to the same information, would still celebrate it)

Rating: Minors DNI.

Author’s Note: Two things : one, the usual thanks to @thisishellfire and @writerwannabetree for their continued support. Also a thanks to @ghost-not-found for checking in on me during this storm in Texas. It means a lot! And two : I felt bad about making y'all wait, so this chapter did not go through my proofreader's desk (sorry @queenlydias, I still love you tho) . I hope it doesn't sound too terrible!

Honey

Thursday dawned, cold and icy, Thanksgiving day. Honey woke up to the sound of her mother clattering with pots and pans, to the smell of chocolate, to her mother singing along with some Christmas classic album she was playing. It was a beautiful, slow, song. One of both Honey and her mother’s favorites, one they’d hum and sing along to every year. Ella Fitgzgerald’s clear, sweet voice floated through the house as Honey pulled herself to the edge of the bed, reaching for her cane and hobbling to the bathroom.

“Honeysuckle, you up?” Her mother’s voice floated down the hall from the kitchen as Honey opened the bathroom door.

“Yes, Mama, I’m just gonna brush my teeth and I’ll come help you cook!” Honey shouted in the direction of the kitchen, ducking into the bathroom and closing the door before her mother responded. She leaned her cane against the counter, looking at herself in the mirror as she waited for the water to warm up enough for her to wash her face. It had only been four months since they’d moved to Hawkins, she realized. Five since they’d lost aunt Lilah to her father’s rage. But something had changed. Honey had found home here, for the first time, a home that didn’t move around. Sure, Lilah’s house had been close to a home - it was consistent, but it was always far away, and it was only home for a week out of a year. This was home all the time.

Honey knew the streets here. She knew the people. She had phone numbers memorized, she said hello to her neighbors and knew their names. She participated in clubs, hung out with friends. She’d even gotten a boyfriend, which was probably the most shocking thing of all when she sat and thought about it. Honey brushed her teeth, then washed her face, humming in the back of her throat to the song as she ruminated about her life. Eddie and his Uncle Wayne were coming over in a few hours to have Thanksgiving with Honey and her mother. It would be the first holiday in a long time that Honey could remember spending with anyone other than Mama. Honey spit her toothpaste foam out and rinsed her mouth, wiping it on the back of her hand before she grabbed her cane and hobbled to the kitchen.

“Ah, but just in case I stand one little chance; here comes the jackpot question, in advance; What are you doin’ New Year’s, New Year’s Eve?” Mama was singing, her sweet voice blending with Ella Fitzgerald’s as she opened the stove to check on the brownies in the oven, then closed it again and set a timer.

“What are you doin’ New Year’s, New Year’s Eve?” Honey repeated, ending the song. Her voice had never been as clear or as sweet as Mama’s - Honey wasn’t much of a singer. Mama was the one who sang in choirs and played piano, not Honey. But the music of the cassette was loud enough that Honey’s tremble couldn’t be heard, and Mama smiled as Honey came in, then frowned as soon as she saw the cane.

“You need to be usin’ the chair. The cane ain’t enough support yet.” She admonished, indicating the cane with her head as she picked up a bowl of potatoes and sat them on the small kitchen table in the corner by the pantry. “Sit down, peel these for me, baby girl.” She added, putting the potato peeler next to the bowl and sliding the trash can next to one of the seats.

Honey obeyed, limping to the seat and leaning on the cane as she lowered herself into the chair. Really, the pain in her hip was nearing minimal at this point. It really only hurt when she changed positions - going from standing to sitting, sitting to standing, laying to sitting, etc - which is why she had to move slowly. But she could sit, stand, walk, and lay down with minimal pain now, and hadn’t taken anything stronger than advil all week. “I know, Mama. But if I’m goin’ back to school on Monday, I need to start strengthenin’ my hip again.”

“You’re usin’ your wheelchair when you go back. At least for another week.” Mama replied, in the voice that said ‘Don’t argue about it.’

But argue, Honey did. “No, Mama. I don’t wanna use the chair at school. It’s embarrassin’.”

“Bein’ disabled ain’t somethin’ to be embarrassed about. Neither is givin’ your body the rest and support it needs.” Mama shot back, her voice stern but patient.

“You don’t understand. You didn’t hafta use a wheelchair halfway through your senior year.” Honey answered, shaking hands working to peel the large bowl of potatoes.

“No, Honey, I didn’t. And you’re right, I don’t understand. I don’t understand why you don’t want to do the best you can for your body.”

“Because, Mama, it’s…people treat me different, when they see the wheelchair or the cane. They act like I can’t do things on my own, they treat me like a child. Like you do sometimes. Or they tell me I’m an inspiration. I don’t get to be me when I’m disabled - I hafta be their idea of the perfect disabled person. I don’t want everyone to know.”

Mama stopped fussing over the deviled eggs she had been arranging on a serving plate, and sat down across from Honey at the little table. “Honey, baby girl, listen to me. You don’t hafta be anythin’, for anyone. Not even for me. If they have a problem with the way that you wear your disability, that is their problem. Not yours. But you can’t let your fear of their perception of you change the way you care for yourself. You hafta give your body the rest and care that it needs to heal as much as possible. You’re usin’ your chair through next week, and we’ll revisit you usin’ the cane next weekend.”

“Mama, I’m 18. I can make my own decisions.” Honey said, her hands stilling on the potatoes.

“You’re right. You are, and you can. And I’m tryin’ to help you make the decision that’s best for you and your health.” Mama replied, getting up as the timer went off and removing the brownies. She set them on the counter to cool and slid the turkey into the oven, placing a meat-safe thermometer in the breast. “But at the end of the day, it’s your body and your choice to make. I won’t tell you what to do anymore, but I hope you’ll still ask for my advice.” Mama added, turning to look at Honey again.

Mama was right, and Honey hated it. She wanted to be mad, but she just felt deflated. “I guess I’ll use the wheelchair next week.” She said on a sigh, picking up the next potato. “Is there anythin’ else you need me to do after the potatoes?” She asked, changing the subject.

“No, I want you to go get dressed after that. We don’t have much more to do other than the mashed potatoes and the gravy.” Mama answered, picking up the plate of deviled eggs and another plate of rolls to take to the dining room table. They passed the next few minutes in silence, Mama coming in and out of the kitchen to transfer the cold food serving plates to the dining room next to the kitchen as Honey finished up the potatoes.

“I’m done peelin’!” Honey shouted to her mother in the next room as she finished the last potato, standing to go.

“Alright, I’ll chop and boil em in a minute!” Mama shouted back.

Honey made her way to the bathroom again, starting up the shower to begin getting ready. She hummed along to the next song on the album as she did so, closing her eyes and leaning against the wall as she swayed to the song. When steam had started to fill the bathroom and Honey was sure the water was warm enough, she set her cane against the back of the toilet and began undressing to climb in.

An hour and a half later, Honey was showered, dressed, her hair fixed, sitting on the couch and watching the window for Eddie’s van while Mama was in her room getting ready herself. Honey felt like an excited puppy dog waiting for their owner to return, pressing her nose to the cold glass every time she heard the rumble of an engine. When a truck came into view and parked in front of her house, she watched as a middle aged man with gray hair and a receding hairline climbed out, brushing his hand down over his mustache and small beard. She met him at the door, swinging it open and leaning on her cane.

“You must be Eddie’s girlfriend, uh, Honey?” The older man asked, shifting between his feet. Honey nodded, turning as she heard her mother’s door open. Honey pretended she didn’t see Wayne’s eyes stray to her cane curiously.

“Oh, you must be Wayne, Eddie’s uncle! We spoke on the phone.” Mama stuck her hand out to shake Wayne’s and he took it, stepping into the house.

“Where’s Eddie?” Honey asked, looking back outside at the empty truck.

“Kid left before me, should have already been here.” Wayne commented looking outside too. “Give him a few minutes, he probably got caught speeding or took a wrong turn.” Wayne shrugged his jacket off as Honey closed the door and limped back to the couch.

“Would you like a glass of wine, a soda, a beer…?” Mama offered to Wayne, ever the hostess.

“A beer would be great.” Wayne answered, clearing his throat. Pamela led him to the kitchen and they disappeared from Honey’s sight as she went back to watching the window for Eddie. She could hear her mother and Wayne chatting - just normal adult talk, from what Honey could hear. They were discussing how the kids would be graduating soon, commiserating that neither of them understood D&D, Wayne was commenting on how nice their home was. Honey tuned them out as she pulled herself up to lean on the windowsill, watching the road.

It was another ten minutes before Eddie finally pulled up, the bumper of his van stopping only inches from Wayne’s. He was out of the van before the engine had even died down, rushing around to the passenger side of the van. Honey turned, struggling off the couch and to the door. By the time she managed to swing it open, Eddie met her there. Honey jerked the door open to find Eddie, hair wild, cheeks pink from the cold, his arms loaded down with two bouquets - one, yellow begonias, and the other, deep pink carnation with white edging. By this point, having heard the ruckus, Wayne and Pamela had made their way back into the living room.

“Jesus Christ boy, I didn’t mean today!” Wayne laughed, holding a hand to his forehead.

“Uncle Wayne said I should bring you guys flowers.” Eddie explained, stepping into the house. He passed the bouquet of yellow begonias into Honey’s arms, giving her a quick forehead kiss.

“I meant that it would be a nice gesture! Not that you had to do it today!” Wayne corrected. “Where did you even find a store open on Thanksgiving?”

“There’s a flower shop down on 12th that stayed open, I checked their hours yesterday when I was heading home.” Eddie answered, bringing the carnations to Pamela. “They didn’t have sunflowers, so I got the first yellow flowers I saw.” He had turned back to Honey, who was cradling the begonias with a dumbstruck look. “I hope they’re okay.”

“I think it was sweet.” Pamela spoke up, ghosting her fingers over the petals of the carnations. “I’m sure we’ve got some vases around. Thank you, Eddie.”

“Uh, yeah, thanks” Honey finally found her voice, limping over to Eddie and smiling up at him as she leaned on her cane. “They’re beautiful. It doesn’t always hafta be sunflowers.” She giggled.

“I know, but they’re your favorite.” He slipped an arm around her shoulder, pulling her toward him so that she could lean her weight against him instead of the cane.

“Well, why don’t I go put these in some vases and y’all can hang out till dinner’s done? Shouldn’t be much longer.” Pamela said, taking Honey’s bouquet and her own as she and Wayne headed back towards the kitchen. Eddie guided Honey back into the living room, to the couch, sitting down and pulling her down next to him.

“I missed you.” He whispered, bringing her hands into his lap.

“You saw me yesterday. And the day before. You’ve seen me everyday this week.” Honey giggled, kissing his cheek. “But I missed you too.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eddie

“I’m glad Ms. Pam invited us over for Thanksgiving. I didn’t want to break the streak of seeing you everyday.” Eddie grinned over at Honey, bringing his arm around her shoulders and pulling her to him for a hug. Honey glanced over her shoulder to make sure they were alone before she leaned in to him.

“Me too. I’m still processin’ it all. A week ago, I was tryin’ to hide my crush because I figured you’d never feel the same, and now…I dunno, sometimes it feels like a dream. Like every time you leave, I wonder if it even happened.” Honey answered, letting her head sit on his shoulder.

“You have the object permanence of a toddler.” He joked, laying his cheek against the crown of her head. He didn’t tell her that he felt the same way. That he had to smell his jacket after every visit to remind himself that she’d been pressed against him an hour before.

“Are you stayin’ tonight? Mama’s workin’.” Honey locked their fingers together in his lap, tilting her head back to look at him.

“I think I’ll try, see if I can get away with it.” He whispered, planting a short kiss on her lips. He moved his lips across her cheek, settling next to her ear and lowering his voice even more. “Maybe I’ll have you for a late dessert.” He added, watching her shiver and delighting that he was the one to cause it as he watched a blush creep across her cheeks. He pulled his mouth away, bringing his voice back to a normal volume so that their parents could hear. “How’s your hip?”

“Still some pain, but better. Mama wants me usin’ the chair next week at school, but I can use the cane around the house. Took some advil earlier. I can move my hip now too, it hurts for a second when I switch positions, like sittin’ to standin’, but it doesn’t take my breath away anymore.” She answered, letting her head rest against him again.

Eddie kissed the top of her head and they lapsed into a comfortable silence, cuddled together on the couch. He thought about how quickly she’d become the center of his universe and wondered if this was what love was supposed to feel like. He hadn’t given much thought to the feeling before, honestly. He’d had a feeling they’d end up having some kind of involvement - he couldn’t imagine his feelings for her could be so strong and not come to a head, eventually - but he’d never considered that it might be love. Love was that mushy, gushy stuff that you saw in Disney movies - it wasn’t something that happened to the town freak.

But this was love. It had to be. From the moment he’d seen her, he’d wanted her, he’d known that he was put on this Earth to be hers. And he was hers. To be fair, she was his too - there was no doubt about that. The way she wrapped herself around him, the way she had opened up to him before anyone else, the way her face lit up with a smile as soon as she saw him every morning - even when she didn’t realize it. Even when she was annoyed at him - which happened every so often - she smiled. He got a little flutter in his chest when she did and couldn’t help but smile back.

The thought settled, finally. Eddie loved her. He’d loved her from the moment he’d met her, he admitted to himself. She was meant and made to fit into his arms, his heart, his life. There wasn’t anyone who would fit better, or anyone he wanted. He’d gladly help push around her wheelchair, reach the top of tall cabinets, carry her where she needed to go. He’d buy her every necklace, every ring, every yellow thing he could get his hands on - to see that crooked tooth smile. Eddie loved Honey.

“You know, I think Corroded Coffin is gonna be as big as Metallica one day.” Honey commented, breaking the silence.

“Oh, you do?” Eddie felt his heart swell up in his chest with affection. Even if it was an empty platitude, he liked hearing her say it.

“Yep. Y’all are gonna be superstars. Awards and groupies and everythin’.” Honey answered.

“What makes you say that?”

“I dunno. Just a feelin’.”

They were silent again, enjoying each other’s company. He wondered if he should share his realization with her. Really, they’d only been together a week at this point - but they’d known each other longer. And sometimes, you just knew, right? Plus, she was a hopeless romantic - she’d appreciate him being honest about his feelings. He opened his mouth, “Honey, I-”

“Dinner’s ready!” Pamela’s voice rang through the house. Honey picked herself up, smiling at him.

“What were you gonna say?”

“Oh, uh, nothing. Just that I was hungry. Let’s eat.” Eddie plastered his smile on, standing up and letting Honey lead him to the dining room. He sat next to her, across from Wayne, and bowed his head when her mother demanded Grace - though he did peek to see she also hadn’t closed her eyes. He gave her hand a little squeeze, and felt his stomach flutter when she squeezed back. Somehow, he felt like he’d just told her he loved her, and she’d returned it - but he still wanted to say it out loud. Just not right now, with their parents watching.

The meal went off without a hitch. He managed to avoid blurting out his feelings around a mouthful of ham, and spent about half of the meal trying to explain Dungeons and Dragons to their parents - with Honey interjecting bits of what she considered crucial information (like about how cute dwarves were, or how bards were always flirting). By the end of the meal, though the parents were no closer to understanding the game, everyone was having a good time. Honey tried a sip of her mother’s wine (“A family tradition, she tries it every year.” Pamela had joked) and ended up gagging on the taste, sending them all into rounds of laughter.

“I don’t think I’m ever gonna like wine.” Honey complained, wiping her tongue with her napkin before sipping her own soda. “It tastes like rot.”

Wayne laughed, stretching back in his chair. “You and me both, kid. Beer or whiskey, that’s the way to go.”

“Well, she is from the South. Maybe she needs a good whiskey.” Pamela joked. “I know my parents used to give me a little every time I was sick and I’m healthy as a horse now.”

Honey shrugged. “I could just…not drink?” She suggested, and the adults laughed again.

“Well yeah, I guess that’s an option too.” Wayne agreed, then turned to her mother. “Pamela, it was so kind of you to invite us over for the holiday, and I hate to dine and dash, but I’ve got a shift in a few hours and I’d like to go home and get a little rest before then.”

“Oh, it’s not a problem, Wayne! I’ll probably do the same myself, I gotta be at the hospital by 7. Here, I’ll walk you out. Kids, can you clean up?”

As Honey and Eddie nodded, the parents stood up and left the room. He could hear the murmurs of their voices saying their goodbyes as he picked up larger dishes - immediately telling Honey she was not allowed to do any heavy lifting - and saw her mother close the door just as he left the dining room to take the larger dishes into the kitchen. Cleaning up didn’t take long - between the two of them, the dishes were washed and placed to dry, and the food was wrapped and refrigerated, in no time at all - with a short interruption for Honey’s mom to wish them goodnight as she headed to her room, of course.

It wasn’t long after that Eddie found himself sitting on the couch with Honey again, this time with her back against the plush arm and his head against her chest, listening to her heartbeat as she turned on a movie. Her hands were combing through his hair, the tv was low, her heartbeat was constant, he was warm and full. It wasn’t long before Eddie felt his eyes closing, and though he kept trying to wake himself up, shifting his position between her legs, moving his head, it didn’t work.

He wasn’t sure when exactly he’d fallen asleep completely, but he woke up to Honey nudging his shoulder. “Eddie.” She whispered, her own voice thick with sleep.

“Hm?” He asked, lifting his head to look at her.

“Mama just left. It’s just us.” She whispered, nodding towards the door. Sure enough, he could hear the sound of her car pulling out of the driveway, her headlights shining through the window before she pulled out of the cul-de-sac. “I wanted to talk to you about somethin’.” Honey added.

Eddie turned his attention back to her, holding himself up. “I wanted to talk to you about something too, actually. You go first.”

“I’ve been thinkin’ about it and I…I think I’m ready for more. In the bedroom. Like, uh…I want to have sex with you. I want you to be the one I lose my virginity to.” Honey muttered. He could see her blushing, even in the low light, and he felt his own face warm.

“I love you.” He said quietly.

“What?” Her eyes were big, wet with tears - no surprise there.

“I said, I love you. And I can’t think of anyone else I’d lose my virginity to, either.” He leaned down, kissing her, his butterflies gone.

“I mean, like tonight.” She added, pressing up against him.

Oh. She meant right now. Eddie grinned, sitting up and pulling her with him. “Well then, why don’t we go to the bedroom?”

#eddie munson fanfic #ehlers danlos awareness #eddie munson smut #eddie munson #stranger things fanfiction #plus size girl #stranger things #disabled #disability #actually disabled #mobility aid #friends to lovers

5 notes · View notes

dridlim · 2 years

Text

IMAGINE FEZ X F!READER

Warnings: strong language.

Word count: 1.3K

Author’s note: English os not my first language, so sorry if there’s something wrong.

She loved Christmas, the kind that really lived for it. I listened to playlists with classic songs, from Mariah Carey to Taylor Swift. She also watched the movies, all that were available that would probably make her cry, and she baked gingerbread cookies for everyone she knew. But this was a different Christmas, she would be working at her parents' diner, which was certainly unfair. She worked there most days of the week, never really bothering to help her parents; but all she wanted was a day off to experience the best day of her favorite era.

Her parents were ruthless, not letting her take time off, so the girl would stay at the store until her usual work time. The diner was empty, predictable, she'd warned her parents about that. A Christmas playlist played around the room, and even though she was upset, she was enjoying herself. Cleaning the counter for the tenth time stirring and even singing another classic hit.

The sound of the bell at the front door of the cafeteria almost went unnoticed, mixing with the bells that accompanied the music.

“Hey” She says stopping her stupid dance and tossing the cloth back, hoping the handsome guy with the red beard hadn't witnessed too much of her delirious moment.

And he in turn smiles, almost shyly and amused. Of course, he had witnessed the whole scene, he even spent a few minutes at the door wondering whether to come in and disrupt the show or not. But it was the only diner that was open. "Hi, your Christmas spirit is in full swing."

"Damn, you've seen too much, clear any traces of your mind" She responds seeing him approach the counter, both laughing.

“So…” He starts looking at the name on the name tag that was on his clothes “(Y/N)? It's a nice name, I like it”

“Thank you” She responds, enjoying the comment.

“Did, what would you recommend for a guy who is alone at Christmas to eat?”

“Well, I don't know. But pancakes always go down well on any occasion.

"Then I will." He replied sitting down in front of her.

"But you're not alone" Answers seeing him looking confused. Damn, those blue eyes had already enchanted her. “Now that you've found me, we're no longer spending our Christmas Eve alone. I'll heat up some donuts for us.” She blinks leaving him alone.

Did he feel a smile grow on his face that he couldn't have any control over, how could he ever have remembered seeing her somewhere in this town?

In a few minutes she returns, with some plates and several donuts in hand, heading to a table near the speaker. He followed her noting the sweater and jeans she was wearing, along with a boot. She was beautiful.

“What do you think of our supper?” Questions standing next to him, several donuts and even some coffee on the table that would be theirs.

“It's my best supper in years” He responds looking at her before they each sit on one side.

“So, Fez, what brings you here?” (Y/N) asks starting to eat a donut.

“Well, my little brother has been sleeping all day and there was nothing to eat at home. It seemed like a good idea to go out to eat, so here I am. Is that you? Shouldn't it be a world day off?

"I think so, but my parents insisted that I work in case someone like you showed up" She raises her eyebrows at him who smiles guiltily "That's part of it, as long as it doesn't snow, I'll still be awake."

“Snow fan?” Questions devouring his donuts "Man this is really good".

“I'm glad you liked it, it's one of my specialties” She smiles proudly “And yes, snow is one of my favorite things in the world. You like?".

“I like it, but to be honest, it's been a long time since I played or even stopped to look at it”.

“If we're lucky, the weather forecast said it should snow in about 30 minutes” She replies looking at her cell phone.

“How have I never seen you around here?” He asks, when you have a job like his, even the richest in town get to know him and do business with him. Most people don't go unnoticed, and he's sure to remember her.

“I moved recently. I was taking a cooking course in the next town, so when I finished, I came to help my parents.”

"So, I'm having dinner with a chef?" He jokes making them laugh, and shit, he was already thinking about taking a joke course to see her smile all the time.

“Almost that, and you? What do you work with?”

“You don't want to know” He replies feeling a little dark, never a gentle girl like her would want to get involved like someone like him.

“Can I try to guess?” She asks seeing him confirm “Drug dealer?”.

He almost spits out the sip of coffee he was taking “How do you know?”.

“When you work in a cafeteria, you make friends with a lot of people” She says “I made friends with Jules, who now comes here all the time with Rue. We talk a lot".

"So, Rue's been explaining to me around?"

“No way” She hastens to deny it “It was a common thing, she just wanted to talk about the guy she considered a brother. His profession was just a detail in the conversation.”

“Dawn” is the only thing he manages to say, feeling a little shy that she knows what he does.

“I think we do what it takes for our family” She takes on a more serious tone “I'm not in the position to judge anyone, especially when you strike me as one of the nicest guys I've ever met”.

"Well, thank you. I really appreciate it.” He responds feeling less uncomfortable, and even grateful that she thinks so.

"It's snowing" She says leaning against the window, snowflakes starting to accumulate across the parking lot "Let's gooo" She says again removing the apron that hugged her waist and taking a thicker sweater near the door. "What are you waiting for? It's snowing!".

She goes back to pull him by the hand, and the simple touch makes Fez feel totally warm. They leave the cafeteria seeing the city begin to paint itself white with the snow, (Y/N)'s smile lights up everything around, and if he wasn't blushing before, now he was sure he was.

"It's like a perfect Christmas" She sighs feeling the snowflakes hug her. Not missing the smile Fez had on his face.

He takes advantage of her distracted look, now looking up, and prepares a snowball to throw at her. Hitting her precisely in the belly.

"You shouldn't have done that" She threatens, as a snowball fight breaks out between the two. The laughter of the two echoes, with only the background of the Christmas songs that she had chosen for the diner. The atmosphere makes them forget all responsibility and any problems they may have in their lives, enjoying the now.

At one point, she finds herself close enough to jump on his back, throwing snow in his face, sending them both crashing to the ground.

“Man, that was cruel” He replies as they both laugh, trying to wipe any traces of snow off his face, getting help from (Y/N).

The touches are subtle, simply to help you toss the snow accumulation. But they are like electrical charges running through their bodies, making the girl lose herself in the immensity of his blue eyes. Linking each freckle, as if they were true stars.

The laughter ends, they don't think to get up from that pile of snow, exchanging only caresses on their faces.

"Can I kiss you?" He asks staring at her lips, which part in a smile causing him to mirror her.

“Please” She replies as he cups her face with both of his hands. It's a slow kiss, in which the two are at ease and taking the opportunity to get to know each other. Like the true classic Christmas movies, she would be crying watching right now.

They part with a few pecks and smiles at sight. “Merry Christmas” She whispers.

“Merry Christmas sweetie” He whispers back pulling her in for another kiss.

#euphoria #fezco #fezco euphoria #fezco imagine #fezco x y/n #fezco x you #euphoria imagine #euphoria oneshot

70 notes · View notes

sotangledupinit · 2 years

Text

run, run rogers - My CSSS2021 Gift

hi there @ilovemesomekillianjones! here’s chapter two of my @cssecretsanta2020 gift to you! thank you for being so understanding and patient!

run, run rogers (chapter 2 of 4)

SUMMARY: The last thing Emma Swan expected to be doing on Christmas Eve was last minute Christmas shopping. But Neal's genius left her in the lurch, and she needs to fix things. And the Uber trip to get this all done? It'll cost her.

RATING: M for Mature (may go up)

WORD COUNT: 4,789 words

TAGS: Captain Swan, Holiday, Uber Driver Killian Jones

AO3

***

They’ve only been on the road for a minute or so when she feels Killian’s eyes looking at her through the rearview mirror. She keeps her gaze on the passing scenery of the busy highway and steadily ignores him, tuning out the Christmas music all the same.

“What exactly are you looking for, love? Perhaps I may be of assistance?”

“I don’t need anyone’s help,” she replies, inwardly wincing at how harsh her voice is. But she doesn’t apologize, especially not when it seems that her tone didn’t affect him.

He hums along to the radio as if ‘Little St. Nick’ by the Beach Boys is his favorite song, head bopping side to side as he drives, the fingers of his right hand tapping against the wheel. If her brain didn’t intend to pound right out of her skull, she’d acknowledge his voice is… nice. Unfortunately for both of them, her head threatens to and the cool glass of her window does little to calm it. His humming only aggravates her further. She’s over Christmas.

She’ll put on a brave face for her kid tomorrow but on the inside she is dreading it. This Christmas was supposed to finally be theirs. Henry’s only been back in her custody for a few years and between getting used to being around each other 24/7 and her jobs, much to her displeasure, keeping her busy, this Christmas was supposed to be the one with no distractions. It was supposed to build the foundation for their future in Boston, a home. They were going to go all out with every holiday tradition they could think of and all the treats they could bake. It was one of the things that Emma told Henry to sooth the ache of the move.

Then they had to run into Neal Cassidy not long after moving to Boston and he put the pieces together quick enough to realize Henry was his kid. The guy never wanted kids, from what she remembers. His dad had been shitty enough that it scarred him from the idea but now he thinks he’s dad of the year every single day and Emma & Henry’s Christmas Spectacular has been cut in half to accommodate Neal’s requests – and how could she deny her kid seeing his dad when she’s already hurt him enough.

Her cabinets are chuck full of ingredients for various kinds of cookies and other holiday treats they intended to bake for the holiday but with Neal’s spontaneous visits, collecting Henry on his way out, and his insistence to have him over for Christmas Eve, none of that had gotten done. There’s a pounding at her temples as she hopes the ingredients don’t go bad anytime soon.

“Killian? Can you…” Her hand gestures to the radio as she leans forward slightly. “Can you turn that off?”

“This?” he asks, fingers going to the dial and inching the volume up, a man with a southern twang cheerily singing about grandma getting run over by a reindeer. Which is so messed up when she thinks about it, but her head bothers her too much to ponder further, face pinched in pain, and when Killian begins to sing along, she unbuckles, leans between the front seats, and slams her fingers against the radio’s power button. Sinking back into her seat, she sighs in relief and closes her eyes in the silence. If she’s lucky enough, a few minutes of shut eye before arriving at Target will help get rid of the headache.

“What’s got you to be such a grinch, Swan?”

Emma doesn’t dignify his question with a response, instead crossing her arms and leaning fully against the glass window again. It’s cold against her cheek, a relief to her skin still heated from how crowded the LEGO Store was. Phone held tight in her grip, its screen is black and Emma mentally runs over Henry’s list once again.

Anger boils under her fingertips as she bypasses the first thing on his list. That damned PlayStation 5 that she waited 4 hours in the rain to get months ago, only for Neal to have two months notice during the busiest shopping season of the year and managing to snag one. Honestly, she wouldn’t be surprised if the PS5 was actually Neal’s but he presented the gift as such to make Henry only think it was his.

“You know,” Killian starts. She slowly opens her eyes, glaring at him through the rearview mirror in an effort to quiet his attempts but he notices and it only widens his grin. “Most men would take your silence as off-putting, but I love a challenge.”

She grinds her teeth together. “I’m concentrating.”

“No, you’re afraid.” His eyes dart from the road to meet her gaze in the mirror and a part of her wants to yell at him to stop, to keep his eyes on the road, but no one is around and her breath catches a little at his determination to meet her gaze for the briefest of moments, though she’d deny it if anyone called her on it.

“What do you think I’m afraid of in your backseat besides you possibly getting us in a crash if you keep looking back here?” Target comes into view down the street and she inwardly groans at the sight of the packed parking lot, only a precursor to the jungle she’ll find inside.

He clicks his tongue and shakes his head. “Afraid to open up, to ask for help.”

The sound of the prison door slamming shut echoes in her head, her walls fortifying themselves at his commentary, hackles rising in defense. He knows her too well. She doesn’t know when it happened but he reads her like an open book and Emma knows for a fact that they’ve told each other more than they’ve shared with others, even if it isn’t much.

“I don’t need help.” She goes over Henry’s list once again in her head as Killian brings Rogers to the curb, slowing down much smoother than her bug ever does. She knows he’s only supposed to wait three minutes and he’ll wait for her up to ten minutes but anything past that and it starts to look sketchy to Uber. So she mutters, “I’ll only be a few,” then darts out of the car before he’s even put it in park. Not her cleanest escape but she needed to get out of there.

“Careful, Swan!” he yells to her retreating figure, the automatic window on his passenger side rolled down. Her hand tosses up in his direction and she loses herself in the crowd.

The superstore is in much of the same shape as LEGO. Packed with last minute shoppers, the shelves full of either disheveled merchandise or large bouts of empty space. The gift card stand by the checkout is near completely wiped. The few left are preset for amounts in the hundreds and for the less popular shops.

Her feet stomp quickly through Target to the back of the store, hoping and praying that there’s at least one item of his still there.

Electronics are a disaster by the time she rushes to it. An employee stands at the counter, harried and sweating, as a woman with fiery red hair yells at him for not having stock of an item on Christmas Eve. Emma hustles past, eyeline set on the headsets that accompany various gaming devices. Henry’s recently gotten into online gaming with his friends on Fortnite and Halo and he kindly put on his Christmas list to Santa some of the options out there.

‘That way I won’t distract Mom from work,’ he wrote next to the many headsets out now and her heart melted. She and Henry looked out for one another; it’s what they do.

Opened boxes, damaged displays, broken plastic security doors, and trash litter the aisle with the gaming headsets. Emma’s strut comes to an abrupt halt at the entrance, her mouth dropping open as her eyes take in the scene. There was something different about this Christmas, more than just for her and Henry. Desperation seeped into every action and motivation this year, everyone trying their damnedest to make the holiday the best one ever as if it were their last, and while Emma was able to stay clear of it until tonight, she feels it invading her pores too.

Hesitantly stepping forward, her boot steps on abandoned plastic from one of the packages. She bends her body closer to the ground and groans as she sees the lower shelves are as empty as the rest of the aisle, not even a stray box hidden against the back.

7:26. Her phone shines the time at her like a taunt. Won’t make it to Best Buy in time so gaming headset out, she thinks quickly to herself. The toys are only across the wide walkway between aisles and Emma scurries across, nearly getting herself run over by the redheaded woman. She ignores the growl sent her way and focuses on the Star Wars section. “Shit,” flies past her lips before she can register it as someone steps on her foot and another person shoves at her shoulder. There’s no care for anyone but themselves and Emma hates the holiday a little bit more.

Growing up she had hope for Christmas. Hope that a family would pick her, hope that she’d find a home. Hope for anything but the situation she was in. And then Santa never delivered and bitterness crawled around her heart like an ugly sweater. Having Henry in life unraveled the darkness clouding her life, but between Neal and the other holiday shoppers, she feels it creeping back in.

Much like her luck the rest of the evening, the aisle is bare. Only miniscule figurines and toy sets that Henry either already has or doesn’t want are left over. Cajoling an employee for help, her heart sinks to her stomach as she’s informed the moving Baby Yoda toy has been sold out for weeks.

Another parent rushes to gain the employee’s attention before they can escape and Emma slinks over to the nearby bedding section where the crowds at thinner. She deletes a few items off of Henry’s list that are out of stock and sighs, the rest of the items either specially ordered online or out of stock in store.

Fucking Neal. He never thought about the consequences of his actions. Never cared for how what he did affected those around him. If she didn’t feel the sting of tears in her eyes, she’d change her final destination to bring her right back to Neal’s place so she could strangle him. A thought crosses her mind making her wonder if he ever even looked at the list or just guessed. She could just imagine him taking the printout she sent him, crumpling it up after the first few lines, and then tossing it without a thought.

Closing her eyes, Emma takes a few deep breaths as the panic sets in. Her body feels hotter than it did just from being in the store and her heartbeat echoes in her ears, worsening her headache. She focuses on regular deep breaths and squeezing and releasing her fists. The night’s not over yet. There’s still one more stop to go and she’ll find something for him there, even if it isn’t on his list.

Determination straightening her shoulders, Emma opens her eyes. She grabs a bottle of ibuprofen and quickly works through the self-checkout before leaving. All she wants to do is take two pills, down an entire case of Killian’s water bottle stash, and cross her fingers that Henry Bear’s Park has something for her kid. He shares a name with the store – they’ve gotta have something, right?

Rogers is idling at the curb a bit away from where she hopped out and she makes her way over, eyes on the lookout for black ice on the ground.

Getting into the car is much the same as last time, with Killian’s eyes perusing her figure and frowning slightly when he sees she’s brought nothing new back. “Still no luck?” he asks.

“As surprising as it may be, no.”

Killian turns all the way around in his seat, shoulder pressed against the cushion as he watches her fiddle with the medicine cap. She can only observe as he takes the bottle from her shaking grip and opens it for her one-handed like it’s a cool party trick. Immediately after, he reaches around to grab a water bottle from the cooler, handing it to her.

“Who are you enduring all this madness for?” he asks after she gulps the entire thing down. The medicine bottle rattles as she tosses it into her purse and sighs, defeat on her lips.

He waits patiently for an answer and she relaxes back into the seat. “For Henry, my son.”

“Aye,” Killian answers, the corner of his lips twitching up. “I remember. From your first ride.”

The look he gives her says the thousands of words he knows she’s afraid to hear and she instantly feels herself recoil. The thought that he remembers that first ride in as vivid detail as she does, her and Henry new to the city and him eagerly engaging their curiosities, both charms her and frightens her.

Instead her focus shifts to the heat crawling up the back of her neck. Pulling at the collar of her coat offers no relief, neither does her hands frantically fanning her face.

“Can you turn on the A/C?” she asks.

Killian’s eyebrows pinch together in a worry, his right hand reaching across his hip to his door. “Fresh air will be better and quicker.” In an instant, her window slides down, the remaining three following in suit. Crisp winter air fills her lungs and tickles her nose. She gulps it down greedily. The car stays in park, Killian eyeing her to make sure she’s alright, keeping his gaze on her face even as she tugs down her sweater to let the cold air brush the heated skin below her neck. When it isn’t enough, she rips the scarf over her head and the first of her two coats off her shoulders.

“Are you alright?”

Emma only nods, closing her eyes and slowing falling back into the seat. Henry’s list has become like a mantra inside her head. Once it ends, the items are called off again. The weight of Killian’s gaze on her panting figure is heavy but she knows if she keeps ignoring him, he’ll turn around and be on their way to the next destination. Which…

Her eyes peek open to look at the clock on her phone and she curses under her breath.

7:38.

She was running out of time.

Leather squeaks as Killian sighs and turns around in his seat, pulling his belt back across his chest and reaching for the gear shift. He’s about to move to Drive when a voice calls out his name through the stillness of the night.

‘Killian! Killian Jones, you wanker!”

Emma opens her eyes, gaze dazed and confused. She sits up in her seat and looks out the window as Killian groans a bloody hell under his breath. A yell from outside Target steals their attention before she can question him.

There’s a figure making its way to the car. They try to stomp but they must be inebriated if they keep listing to the side like that, she thinks to herself. It’s a man wearing a leather jacket and jeans, waving his phone around like a maniac as he comes closer. Killian’s in a race to unbuckle his seatbelt and cut off the stranger but he’s only using one hand. Emma hasn’t gotten hers on yet so she scoots closer to the middle and reaches forward to help him when her car door opens and the man clumsily slides in beside her, his hip roughly bumping against hers and pushing her fully to the middle. Her feet are tangled with the newcomers behind the passenger seat and her chin hits the side of Killian’s seat as he curses under his breath, twisting the best he can to face whoever’s entered the car.

“You bloody tosspot! You’re a right arse, you know that?! I saw ye car here and have been trying to request ya for five minutes but you’re not showing! Ya got ya light on – what’s the deal!”

Emma gets a whiff of the alcohol on his breath when he turns to face her, thick eyebrows shooting up and eyes widening as if realizing for the first time that Killian isn’t alone. Who gets drunk outside of Target?!

“Who are you?”

Her face twists in disgust, pulling back from the stranger’s space and she grips the driver’s headrest before looking to Killian with her eyebrows raised. “Do you know him?” The question comes out more like she’s in the midst of an interrogation instead of the back of his car.

The sigh that comes from Killian’s lips is heavy in the air and he reaches his hand up to scratch behind his ear. “Unfortunately.” She watches his gaze rove over his friend, the downturn of his lips, and the regret that fills the crinkles around his eyes. She knows what he’ll say before he speaks and she begins shaking her head. “I’m sorry, love. I’ve got to cancel the ride and take care of him.” No, no, no!

The red cancel button in the corner of his app stares back at her and panic sets in. 7:42 mocks her from her phone and she reaches forward, her hand shooting out to pull his down before it can reach his own phone. “No.”

He lets her hand slowly lower his, watching her with bated breath and a bewildered look in his eyes. She gets it. The night so far has consisted of her short answers and lack of desire to be within ten feet of him. But it wasn’t anything against him. And now the ibuprofen is starting to kick in and time is moving much quicker than she wants and desperation curls around her chest.

Furrowing his eyebrows, Killian tilts his head to the side, considering her. “But Swan, I can’t just –”

“I don’t care.” She keeps her eyes wide so he can see the seriousness of her admission. “Just bring me to Henry Bear’s Park and then you can drive off with your friend or whatever.”

“I –”

“Oi!” Will practically yells in her ear beside her. He gestures between Emma and the road, his voice still too loud for the small car. “Do as the lady asks!”

Emma ignores him and settles her gaze back on the man in the driver’s seat. “Please, Killian.”

He searches her eyes – looking for what, she doesn’t know – then turns around. Her heart sinks when she sees his finger still press the cancel button and resigns herself to gathering her things, struggling against Will’s weight to move her legs from underneath his. She’ll have to wait until she gets out of the car before she orders another Uber, already losing so much precious time, and she feels a stinging in her eyes.

It’s as she’s moving to the other side of the door, one hand on the handle, that Killian asks what she’s doing.

“I – uh… You cancelled the ride.”

“So?” he says with a shrug. “You still need to find something for your lad and I certainly won’t make you pay for dealing with Will there.”

“Are you serious?”

“Have you met Killian Jones before, lass?” Will asks. Emma pulls the center console down to offer her some space as he leans towards her. “The bastard doesn’t know when to let things go.” He shakes his head and reaches a hand inside his jacket to pull out a flask. Whiskey. The smell was faint enough on his breath that she couldn’t pinpoint what he’d been drinking but now it was apparent as it assaulted her nose. “Not a thing he doesn’t see through to the end.”

“Why are you here?!” she asked him.

His eyes dart from her to Killian then back to her, wide and almost innocent. “Needed a ride from me friend.”

She eyes him for a moment longer until she shakes her head. Under normal circumstances, she wouldn’t have put up with Will’s appearance. She’d have pushed him out of the car, maybe even called David over public intoxication just so he wouldn’t bother her. Except these were anything but normal circumstances and the guy seemed harmless enough. Besides, she trusts Killian and he wouldn’t let her stay in the car if she was in danger. She’s learned enough about him over their various rides to give him credit for that.

(He’s also willing to spend the next undetermined amount of time driving her around without charging a penny even though she’s sure he could make a killing tonight. Aside from Mary Margaret and David, she can’t recall anyone else doing something so selfless for her.)

Killian reaches behind his seat to snag the flask from Will’s hand right as his friend goes to drink from it again, corking it and tossing it under the passenger seat. “Cutting you off, Scarlet. That’s mine until the new year.”

“Bloody wazzock,” Will grumbles under his breath. A part of Emma wants to laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation while another wishes he’d shut up so her headache doesn’t come back. Instead she sighs in relief once Killian starts to leave. 7:47. The store doesn’t close until 8:30 and it’s her absolute last hope for the night.

“Any way I can help you with Henry?” Killian asks, his eyes glancing up at the rearview mirror to meet hers.

“I’m good.”

“I’m serious, Swan. If there’s some way that I can –”

Before Killian could finish his sentence and Emma could reject his help again, Will speaks up. “Who’s Henry?”

She sucks in a breath, counts to three, then turns to Will. As harmless as he may be, that doesn’t retract from the annoyance of his presence. “My son,” she says with a finality to her voice that she hopes he picks up on. Will hums and cranes his neck to look at her left hand, the obviousness of the gesture bringing his face closer to hers and she nearly chokes on the smell of whiskey now. It’s so potent it makes her swear to herself she’ll never drink it again.

He seems satisfied to find no ring and Emma prays he doesn’t hit on her. “So you have a kid, huh?” Will leans back in his seat, wriggling his eyebrows as he points at Killian. “You know, Killian is great with kids. Loves the buggers.”

She can’t help but chance a look at Killian from the corner of her eye. Knuckles white as he grips the wheel with one hand, she can barely see the muscles in his cheek move as he mutters, “Bloody hell.”

“He’s a gentleman too,” Will continues. He puffs out his chest as if he were bragging about himself.

“You? A gentleman?” Emma teases, peering around the driver’s seat at Killian. She remembers how her first solo trip ended when she thanked him for the ride, her tone indicating something other than the car trip she just took. And how he gave her a wicked smile and a dark look and promised if he gave her a ride, she’d feel it.

Killian rolls his eyes, flicking on his turn signal with his wrist. “I’m always a gentleman.”

“Anyway, me mate’s such a gentleman that he gave me kid sis flowers to cheer her up after she almost drowned and she’s still half in love with him! I think she’d marry him if she could.”

“Your sister was 8. That was 14 years ago.”

“It still counts.” Will nudges her side and gestures to Killian. “I’m trying to help him out and he’s calling out technicalities. A right git if you ask me.”

“She didn’t ask.”

“Oi, you have any food back here?”

“Pipe down, Scarlet.”

“What kind of Uber driver are you if you don’t offer ya rides food!”

“Here,” Emma cuts in. She pulls out a wrapped poptart from her bag, grateful the thing didn’t crumble in her adventures of the night. Will inspects it once she hands it over, frowning.

“There’s a bite taken out of it.”

“I’ve had all my shots.” Emma shoots him an overly saccharine grin and she can see Killian’s own annoyance slip into amusement when Will huffs. The man beside her curls up in the corner of his seat as he chews, glaring at them when they look his way.

“Tell me about Henry,” Killian says quiet. His smile reminds her of hope and soft prodding to open up, the same way all the coordinators in the foster system smiled at her. But where theirs were fake, his is genuine and it practically steals her breath. Off-kilter, Emma responds without thinking.

“He’s the best kid in the world. I probably don’t deserve him, honestly. He doesn’t complain too much and he understands when things change with my work and he’s so full of hope, I don’t know where he got it from.” Blood appears on her bottom lip as the cracked skin of her dry lips breaks when she smiles wide. Killian wordlessly hands her a napkin. “Over the past two years, he’s really discovered his knack for writing. He’s creating fairytales, writing comics – if he can put a story to it, he will. And I swear, he’s going to be a best-selling author one day. His mind… I can’t begin to understand how he comes up with it all.”

“He’s lucky to have someone like you supporting his endeavors.”

Heat rises to her cheeks and Emma hopes he thinks she’s just still warm from earlier.

Rogers comes to a slow stop in front of a store and Emma reads Henry Bear’s Park overhead. 7:59. Will wishes her a good luck as she gets out of the car, the scarf and coat she shucked in her hands, and she’s surprised to find Killian doing the same.

“Leave your things in the car, love.”

“No, no, it’s fine. I’ve got it. You can take care of Will then do other rides.”

She turns her head to look inside the car to see the man of the hour bent over his knees, arm reaching under the passenger seat. Killian knocks on the window and Will jumps, a guilty grin on his face as he slowly sits up still without his flask.

“Will fought with his love earlier, made a mess of things. He just needs the alcohol cut off and to get his sorry state to her door to offer his apologies.” He’s sheepish as he turns towards her. “Sorry if he’s bothering you, Swan. He really is harmless and quite a good friend.”

“I could tell. Especially given he was able to wingman you in his condition.”

He huffs out a laugh and she grins at the sound. He doesn’t laugh nearly as often as she thinks he should, always teasing remarks or smirks on his lips. She supposes the same could be said for her and the thought settles heavily on her heart. The most unguarded she is is around Henry. He gets her smiles and her laughs and her soft moments instead of the snark, smirks, and sharp edges she gives to others. Killian has his reasons as much as she has hers but she finds it dispiriting that he closes himself off like that.

As if he can read her thoughts, he gives her a smile, soft and small but real.

“Let me at least help you with this. I’ll watch over your things so you’re not lugging it through the store.”

Shock registers on her face and Killian must recognition it as he grins at her, hand coming up to scratch behind his ear. She assumed that after she denied his help again, he’d have accepted it and took Will home. But he’s staying.

“Are – are you sure?” she asks, still trying to find her footing in the conversation.

“Aye.” His face serious, Killian keeps his gaze locked on hers for a few moments until she nods. She hesitantly hands her scarf and coat over and lets her fingers brush against his, lingering longer than needed. Even if the entire night has gone to shit because of Neal, she can take this with her as a small victory.

With a deep breath, Emma steps aside and turns toward the store.

#cssecretsanta2021 #csss #captain swan #killian jones #emma swan #will scarlet #ilovemesomekillianjones #temporarystatus #my fics #run run rogers #captain swan fanfic #holiday fic #cs fanfic #cs ff #secret santa

37 notes · View notes

blu-joons · 2 years

Text

CHRISTMAS A⇴Z HEADCANON ⇴ Kang Younghyun

A ⇴ ACTIVITIES

Younghyun loved going to listen to the music over Christmas, there was very little that he enjoyed more then venturing into the city and singing along with the local carol singers, humming along in the background to them.

B ⇴ BAKING

It never took too long when you started baking for Younghyun to appear, it was almost as if he was trained to be able to tell exactly when you were baking and follow the smell into the kitchen. Whenever you spotted him walking into the kitchen you would notice the wide smile that was on his face as he silently let you know that he was loitering around so that he could get the first helpings of whatever you were making.

C ⇴ CHRISTMAS EVE

The two of you followed his family’s traditions to a tee every year on Christmas Eve. His mum liked to have everything organised for the two of you whilst you were in their home, and if you were honest, you enjoyed having someone take care of you on Christmas Eve so that you could relax for once too.

D ⇴ DECORATING

Neither of you saw much point in decorating too much when you spent Christmas away from home, and so your house was usually quite minimalistic. The one thing that you both agreed on however, was that your house always had to have a tree, it didn’t matter how big or small of a tree it was, or how many baubles were on it too, but Christmas would just never be the same in your home without a tree in it.

E ⇴ EVENTS

The two of you enjoyed walking around most evenings and just seeing what you could find. As you were so busy you never planned too much as you weren’t usually sure if you could actually make it to things. Instead, you would walk around the city and if you saw a festive event that you liked the look of then you would spontaneously head over to take a closer look and see if it was something you wanted to attend.

F ⇴ FOOD

You put a lot of effort in when it came to the Christmas dinner at Younghyun’s family home, trying to support his mum with the cooking as much as you could as a token of appreciation for her hosting you both. No matter how many times she assured you that you were a guest, that never stopped you from getting stuck in and helping out wherever you could, which in turn meant a hungry Younghyun got fed much quicker too.

G ⇴ GIFT GIVING

Christmas was all about the giving as far as Younghyun was concerned, he loved seeing the looks on people’s faces whenever he gave them what he had bought them, knowing that he usually got people exactly what they wanted.

H ⇴ HOLIDAY HOME

Every year the two of you would make the effort to go and visit his family over Christmas as it was about the only time during the year that you got the chance too. His schedule would be cleared to give you both plenty of time out there to enjoy the holidays and make up for the rest of the year that you spent apart.

I ⇴ ICE

There was always a little scepticism in Younghyun whenever you mentioned going ice skating, it seemed that no matter how many times that he went with you, he still just couldn’t quite get the hang of it, and when he did finally manage to let go of the barrier, your session would coincidentally time out on the rink.

J ⇴ JOY

Just being with you put a smile on Younghyun’s face at Christmas, even before the two of you flew out to be with his family, Younghyun enjoyed just being able to spend time with you and do plenty of fun things too. No matter how busy he was, Younghyun enjoyed taking the time out of his schedule to enjoy Christmas with you.

K ⇴ KIDS

He loved being a kid again at Christmas and having his parents with him to look after you. For most of the year Younghyun was independent and taking care of you, but Christmas was the one time of year when he had someone looking after him instead, with his mum and dad watching over him the entire time that you were with them.

L ⇴ LOVE

Younghyun loved the chance to be able to fly around the world and be with his family, and you during the holidays. He never felt particularly homesick throughout most of the year when in Korea, however you could always see by the bright look in his eyes as soon as Younghyun reunited with all of his family just how much he really missed them, even if he did do a good job of disguising it around you.

M ⇴ MOVIES

Neither of you were particularly massive on watching Christmas movies, you didn’t have that much free time to sit down and watch a full movie together and so most of the time you would listen to songs instead, much quicker and snappier and the perfect intervals to slot in between your busy schedules.

N ⇴ NAUGHTY OR NICE

There was never any doubt in your mind that Younghyun would end up anywhere else but on your nice list, he treated you perfectly, and so you always wanted to spoil him at Christmas when it came down to his presents.

O ⇴ OBSESSION

Younghyun was obsessed with the happiness that came with Christmas, Younghyun loved being able to relax over the holidays, it was the one time of year when he didn’t have to worry about work and could just focus on his family.

P ⇴ PRESENTS

As you went away for Christmas, the two of you were very limited on how many presents you could fit in your suitcase, and so usually you would end up having to go on a huge shopping spree just a couple of days later once you arrived at his parent’s home so that you could finish shopping and finish off everyone’s presents.

Q ⇴ QUESTIONS

You would often be shouting across at each other whenever you went shopping to try and get each other’s attention so that you could show each other what you’d found and see what you thought about the item as a present idea.

R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS

As Younghyun’s birthday was so close to Christmas, the two of you usually threw a party in between his birthday and Christmas. Not only did it give you the chance to celebrate Younghyun, but it also gave you the chance to celebrate Christmas with all of your friends too before flying to spend Christmas Day with his family.

S ⇴ SNOW

The two of you loved going on walks whenever it snowed and exploring the local area. It was certainly a challenge for the both of you sometimes as you tried to trek through the deep snow, but the two of you always ended up laughing as one of you inevitably ended up falling over after tripping up on something accidentally.

T ⇴ TRADITION

Each year the two of you would visit the same Christmas market, which was also where you bought the majority of your presents too, finding beautiful handmade gifts on many stalls that you knew that your family would adore.

U ⇴ UNDERNEATH THE MISTLETOE

You purposely drove Younghyun towards the mistletoe at Christmas he became a lot shier kissing you around his family, moving him under the mistletoe so that he had no choice but to kiss you, no matter who was around.

V ⇴ VACATION

Every Christmas was a vacation for the two of you as you went across to Canada to spend the holidays with his parents. You both loved getting away, seeing your families and taking the chance to relax for a while too.

W ⇴ WRAPPING

The two of you made a great team when it came to wrapping presents, you had the perfect system going on to get it all done in no time at all.

X ⇴ XXXX

Being affectionate with you at Christmas often left Younghyun feeling very shy, being around his family left him feeling much more nervous about kissing you then he did when you were in Korea and by yourselves.

Y ⇴ YOU

You were top of his wish list, the thing he wanted the most was another year with you.

Z ⇴ ZZZ

He slept at his most comfortable on the night before Christmas, knowing not only that he was with you, but also the fact that he was with his family too having waited most of the year to reunite with them all.

---

Masterlist

39 notes · View notes

avinaccia · 3 years

Text

A Completely Objective and Logical Ranking of Every Hetalia Character Song

New character songs are dropping, I have too much time on my hands, let’s go.

Also here’s a Youtube playlist for the ~✨nostalgia✨~

Bring it on in the tags

71. Ah Legendary Class⭐The Awesome Me Highway [Prussia]: Absolutely tearing it up on the drums and on the vocal cords alike (I pray for Atsushi Kousaka). Great for the memes.

70. Happy Thoughts Museum [???]: This is listed as an official song but I had literally never heard of the title. Then I listened to it and BAM! Smack back to 2013 watching the teasers for the show on Funimation. Not sure I’d count it as a character song though...

69. (Nice) My Song that is written by me for me [Prussia]: Deafened me but I can appreciate the industrial grind.

68. My House is...Quiet. ~With the Trolls~ [Norway]: I have never heard this song, nor can I find any version of it online. By default it goes here and I am so sorry Norge.

67. Make a Wish to Santa♪ [Sealand]: The discordant notes and childish exuberance only serve to make this sound like a demonic plea to Santa to eliminate the singer’s enemies.

66. Heaven and Hell on Earth [Rome]: Rome sounds like he’s been in the corner of a restroom. Extra points for the metal version, minus points for the fact that the beach scene was replayed like 1764 times.

65. Canada Complete Introduction [Canada]: Quiet af until Kumacheerio shows up and blows out your speakers. they did you dirty my darling 😔

64. It’s Easy!!! [America]: I don't think any video of this has ever stayed up for more than 20 seconds. Sounds cool, but like I was listening to 20 different genres at once, someone make him calm down.

63. Bù Zàiyì the Small Stuff ☆ [China]: I cannot for the life of me find the complete song anywhere, clips have a cool beat though

62. Let's Boil Hot Water♪ [Italy]: Exactly what it says on the tin..though a bit too close to elevator music for my tastes.

61. The Fragrance of Early Summer [Japan]: Very ‘from the books’ Japan-esque song

60. Peace Sounds Nice…[Baltic Trio]: All well and good until the radio demon shows up

59. W●D●C ~World Dancing~ [America]: How a song can sound like it’s from 4 different decades at once is beyond me

58. Overflowing Passion [BFT]: This is just drunken karaoke and I have 0 clue what’s going on #iconicforallthewrongreasons

57. Ren●Ren●Renaissance♪ [Rome+Chibitalia]: Wholesome Grandpa with Grandson content - barring the fact that Italy sounds on the verge of a nervous breakdown and Rome has had too much wine.

56. Roma Antiqua [Rome]: Similar energy to any one of China’s songs - there’s a part of the song where it sounds like he’s singing in the shower, and I will never not laugh at [CENSORED]

55. Country From Where the Sun Rises, Zipangu [Japan]: Very chill, very Japan, but just meh for me.

54. Moon Over Emei Shan [China]: Good message, okay song.

53. My Friend [England]: What a mind palace you must have Mr. Kirkland

52. With Love, from Iceland [Iceland]: Three words: Heavy. Metal. Puffin.

51. Having Friends is Nice...♫ [Russia]: Russia is the cutest thing ever

50. Mm. [Sweden]: Smooth transition from WWE Smackdown to shopping at IKEA.

49. Why don’t you come over? ~Beyond the Northern Lights~ [Iceland]: I don’t want to be mean but...this does sound like the second closing theme to an anime whose first closing was much more popular (à la Soul Eater)

48. Gakuen☆Festa [Germany, Italy, Japan]: Sounds like a 60s song of the summer but oh dear their voices do not go together. Hella cute though.

47. Wa! Wa!! World Ondo [Main Cast]: One time I travelled 10 hours in a coach bus with a bunch of teenagers to a city of note in my country, and the only souvenir I bought was the fucking PAINT IT WHITE DVD. Perfectly chaotic, UN ĐĕùX~~

46. In the Bluebell Woods [England]: In the album cover for this song he’s holding a guitar but this is not a rock song. Still has ‘running through the hills’ levels of dramatism though.

45. Poi Poi Poi♪ [Taiwan]: You’re telling me that Taiwan, someone whose has *ONE LINE* in Beautiful World (which is criminal tbh what kind of representation-) managed to get an eNTIRE CHARACTER SONG???????

44. White Flame [Russia]: There’s something to be said for a song that is 3x the length of any Hetalia episode

43. Ich liebe… [Germany]: Baking cakes for your friends has never been so wholesome.

42. We Wish you a Merry Christmas [America, China, England, France, Russia]: Nice to see they’ve gotten their shit together since United Nations Sta-hmm.

41. Ah, Worldwide à la mode [France]: Sounds like a Disney Princess song, hard not to picture France frolicking in a field of flowers.

40. Che Bello! ~My House is the Greatest!⭐~ [Italy]: Would not be out of place in an advertisement for Sea World.

39. May You Smile Today [Japan]: THE feel good song of the summer

38. Let’s Look Behind the Rainbow [Italy]: I will protect you.

37. I'm your HERO☆ [America]: “Anyone who’s sad or sullen will be arrested” did NOT age well.

36. Mein Gott! [Prussia]: Alternating headphone effect at the beginning is cool, so is the confidence...the actual singing on the other hand...

35. Nihao⭐China [China]: Listen, all of China’s character songs are great, I just can’t vibe with this one like some of the others.

34. Pechka ~Light My Heart~ [Russia]: I’m still having difficulty wrapping my head around the fact that this and Winter were released at the same time.

33. Pukapuka⭐Vacation [Germany, Italy, Japan]: Seems just a bit too much like they’re running on a treadmill that’s picking up speed and trying to sing at the same time. Peppy.

32. Santa Claus is Coming to Town [Germany, Italy, Japan]: This is unironically the best song sung by this trio; can only vibe with for two months out of the year though.

31. Excuse Me, I Am Sorry [Japan]: Japan’s character traits speedrun. Gives me barbershop quartet vibes for some reason but is catchy as hell.

30. The Story of Snow and Dreams [Russia]: A superhero anime opening in the making

29. England’s Evil Demon Summoning Song [England]: Sir that is not how you roast a marshmallow, don’t cut yourself on that edge.

28. Moi Moi Sauna♪ [Finland]: Exactly the type of song you’d expect and it’s wonderful

27. United Nations Star⭐ [America, China, England, France, Russia]: This isn’t as much of a song as it is a four minute struggle for everyone to sing without America yelling every 5 seconds...Like a particularly musical episode of Hetalia.

26. Paris is Indeed Splendid [France]: Paris-pa-pa-pa-paris

25. Absolutely Invincible British Gentleman [England]: Poppy, rocky, polka-dotty

24. Vorwärts Marsch! [Germany]: To quote the comment section: “This sounds like a German version of I’ll Make a Man out of you.” There’s some truth to that.

23. Hamburger Street [America]: The product of America’s rapper phase. 8/10 because he’s trying so hard and because I can unironically sing along to all of this.

22. Hoi Sam☆Nice Guy [Hong Kong]: A song that would absolutely destroy the ankles of anyone in DDR.

21. I Am German-Made [Germany]: There was once a version that had Germany and Prussia singing at the same time and it sounded positively demonic and Broadway could never

20. La pasión no se detiene ~Unstoppable Passion~ [Spain]: Talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show-stopping...

19. Fall in Love, Mademoiselle [France]: Sounds like it should be in Mozart Opera Rock, I have kiss kiss falled in love.

18. Embrace the Très Bien Moi [France]: This is the definition of SELF LOVE PEOPLE.

17. Carrot and Stick [Belarus&Ukraine]: Absolutely DRIPPING in 2000s power ballad energy. The type of song that plays on repeat in the mind of the widow whose millionaire husband ‘mysteriously disappeared’ (and the only legit character song ever acknowledged by the anime)

16. C.B.C (Cowboyz Boot Camp) Vol. 1 [America]: AH MAH GAWWDDD

15. Winter [Russia]: Heavy metal fever dream and the perfect song for an angst-ridden teenager

14. Seychelles Here ⭐ Vacation Island [Seychelles]: UN👏DER👏RA👏TED SONG👏OF 👏THE 👏SUM👏MER👏

13. Nah, it will settle itself somehow [Romano]: One day I aspire to reach this level of chill

12. Let’s Enjoy Today [England]: I will never not feel happy when listening to this.

11. Einsamkeit [Germany]: Ludwig manages to air every single one of his worries about not being good enough compared to his friends and always being perceived as mean or uptight when he’s actually just a softie and now my heart hurts. 💔

10. Aiyaa Four Thousand Years [China]: A very poignant and beautiful song about the passage of time and the inevitability of its passing; comparable to an ancient ballad complete with explosive crescendos and meaningful lyrics.

9. Bon Bon Bon❤️C’est Bon C’est Bon! [France]: Peppy, cheerful, adorable, groundbreaking; has been my alarm tone for six years and I’ve yet to tire of it. 9/10 The moaning interspersed throughout has been an interesting wake-up call.

8. Let’s Enjoy! Let’s Get Excited! Cheers! [Denmark]: This is on par with Everytime we Touch by Cascada in terms of rage potential unlocked (the good kind)

7. Dream Journey [Japan]: Whoever’s playing the shakuhachi is absolutely KILLING IT. Dramatic, wonderful, great metaphors.

6. Gourmet’s Heart Beginner Level [China]: Absolute banger, I’m a vegetarian but this would inspire me to eat shumai.

5. Always with you...Nordic Five! [Nordic FIVVVVVEEEE]: Everyone harmonizes beautifully except for Denmark. Extremely catchy, number placement seemed appropriate.

4. Pub and GO! [England]: I love this trash man

3. Maji Kandou⭐Hong Kong Night [Hong Kong]: If you thought Denmark’s song was a banger JUST YOU WAIT. I WILL BLOW OUT MY SPEAKERS LISTENING TO LO-HA-SU.

2. Steady Rhythmus [Germany]: THIS SONG IS METAL AF. Seriously, if it can be classified as ‘hardcore’ by my father and his group of 50-somethings who have decided to single-handedly gatekeep the metal and hardrock genres, it can do anything.

1. The Delicious Tomato Song 🍅 [Romano]: Beautiful, absolutely awe-inspiring, poignant, catchy lyrics with an extremely deep meaning that only years of meticulous research and analysis can unlock, Romano I love you.

BONUS: Closing Songs

5. Hatafutte Parade (World Series)

4. Hetalian⭐Jet (The World Twinkle): The song is good, the dancing is cursed

3. Chikyuu Marugoto Hug Shitainda (World⭐Stars)

2. Marukaite Chikyuu (Hetalia: Axis Powers): nE NE PaPA

1. Mawaru Chikyuu Rondo (The Beautiful World)

93 notes · View notes

realcube · 3 years

Text

class 1-A’s love languages headcanons 💕

tw// swearing, crying, she/her reader

Yuuga Aoyama

his love language is words of affirmation

like tell him that he looks fabulous but he is also a talented hero

and. he. will. die.

of happiness ofc 🥰

and whenever you are feelin’ insecure he’ll do a pretend fashion show with you to boost you spirits (o゜▽゜)o☆

Mina Ashido

her love language is physical touch

but not in a *holds your hand 🥺* *kithes🥰* sorta way

but rather in a

“YOU’RE SO FKN CUTE, (Y/N)!!!” *aggressively pinches your cheeks*

and whenever she kisses/hugs you, it’s always a surprise attack form behind

she is also 159cm in height (almost 5″3)

so if you are shorter than her, she’ll sprint up to you and before you have time to react, she’ll engulf you in her arms

if you are around the same height as her, she’ll sneak up to you and try to jump onto your back, peppering you in neck kisses

and if you are taller than her, she’ll grab your hand and place a kiss on the back of it

Tsuyu Asui

i think her love language is gift giving

but not typically gifts from the store

it’s usually cute flowers or any sort of pretty flora that she finds on her walks

and she’ll sometimes come to your room just before lights-out and hand you a shiny rock or a colourful flower like “hi, (y/n). i found this flower in the park a nd it reminded me of you. so here, i hope you like it.”

then you cry (❤´艸｀❤) it’s too precious

also when she visits your dorm, she notices that you have a jar filled with all the flowers she’s every gave you and shE BRAIDS THEM INTO YOUR HAIR

and if you don’t have hair, she makes you a flower crown out of them

Tenya Iida

the king of gifts periodt ✋

to him, gift giving is kinda like a sport and if it was, he’d definitely be winning

he’ll be out getting groceries or sumn then he’ll pass the candy aisle and just *flashback to 3 months ago when y’all were studying together and you randomly said you were craving sour patch kids*

then he buys two packs of sour patch kids (❤ ω ❤)

so obviously excels during holidays like christmas, valentines day or your birthday

and if you make it explicitly clear that you need something (ex. water, medication, cutlery, soap etc.) and you will go get it in x amount of day(s)

expect it to be in your hands within 1-9 hours

“Iida, you didn’t have to rush out to get me Ibuprofen - I was going to go get some in a few days anyway.”

“Yes, but as a hero in training, you must agree that seeing your partner potentially suffer to due a preventable cause would be inhumane.”

“I-..”

Ochaco Uraraka

her love language is probably quality time

OR words of affirmation BUT ONLY ONLINE

like irl she loves going on lil’ picnic dates with you or dates to go watch the sunset or star-gazing..or literally anything where she gets to spend as much time in your presence as possible

you could literally take her on a date inside the sewers and she’d be like 🥰

in the moment (during the date) she just looks at you and wants to tell you how beautiful you are but she is way too nervous

but as soon you leave she texts you sumn like ‘OMG >< YOU ARE SO GORGEOUS 😍 AND I WANTED TO TELL YOU SO BAD BUT I COULDN’T 😩’

also, hypothetically, if she had a phone which supported social media platforms like Instagram and Snapchat

she would definitely be the sort of girl to post cute candid pics of you on any special occasion and i mean ANY

like she doesn’t want to just random post pics of you bc she thinks that’d be weird so she looks for any excuse she can

deadass she’d post a beach pic of you and her on her insta with a caption like, ‘happy pancake day to @y/n.l/n 🥰💖 on our first date we shared a stack of pancakes so this is a really special day for us 💓 i’m so blessed to have a stunning, smart, amazing gal like her by my side always 💕’

Mashirao Ojiro

he’s a physical touch kinda guy

sometimes he’ll randomly drape his tail over your shoulder to pull you close

or he’ll pat your head with either his hand or tail when ever you do anything remotely impressive

“ooh, i’ve apparently taken 17k steps so far today, ojiro.”

then he’d be like “that’s good” *pat pat*

he also gets butterflies whenever you hug his arm or tail while he is talking to someone

AND HE WILL KISS YOUR WOUND BETTER IF YOU GET A PAPER CUT OR SUMN

Denki Kaminari

bb is blushing profusely when you hand him a pikachu plushie , saying it reminded you of him

before that, he was probably a physical touch sorta guy but once he realised how awesome and special that simple action made him feel, he became a gift-giver

however, 99.9% the gift is a plushie and the other 0.1% it’s a doll

(he literally bought a whole fkn barbie bc you owned a dress similar to the one the doll was wearing)

“it looks exactly like you!”

“i don’t think so..” “it literally does!”

anyway, whether he is at the mall, in the town, in a gift shop or at the carnival, if he sees something that he knows you’d like or that reminds him of you, he’ll stop at nothing to get his hands on it

flashback to that one time at the carnival, there was a stall that had a huge fkn Kuromi plushie up for grabs

so he asked the lady running the stall if he could have it and she said it was all his, if he could get a ball into the basket 3 times in a row

-- my man was sTANDING THERE DESPERATELY TRYING FOR 30 MINUTES STRAIGHT 😭

and once he figured he couldn’t do it on his own, he got the bakusquad to help him out

(bakugo was all like ‘i’m not helping you, dumbass’ but kirishima convinces him to give it a shot and as soon as he misses on the third shot, he is livid.)

(”YOUR STUPID PARTY GAME MUST BE BROKEN, LADY!”)

anyway, after an hour of holding up the line, the lady just gave the plush to kaminari for ¥1000

but it was all worth it after he saw how thrilled you were 🥺

he came round to your dorm one day and noticed every plushie he had ever given you, sitting on your bed

you told him that they help you sleep and he just..died..

IT MADE HIM SO FKN HAPPY TO THINK THAT YOU TREASURE HIS GIFTS SO MUCH (≧▽≦*)

Eijirou Kirishima

his love language is words of affirmation imo but with a sprinkle of physical touch

like whenever he sees you looking nice or sumn..he’ll just tell you

he has no shame and why should he? he’s just telling the truth

if you walk into the room looking ✨immaculate✨ he will tell you

he’s just like ‘if nobody else is going to say it then I will.’

when your face lights up after he has just told you that you’re beautiful or that you’re one of the most likeable people he’s ever met; it makes his day every. single. time.

the sprinkle of physical touch is because he tells you what he is thinking all the time

and he thinks you’re stunning even when you are lounging around the dorm complex in casual wear and no makeup

so he’s aware that he might’ve watered down his compliments a bit by saying them too often

(even though he’s telling the truth every time)

so he likes to give you hugs and kisses to express his affection without seeming like he’s buttering you up

Kouji Kouda

honestly, idek which category he falls under bc he does so many different things to show his love

like, he’ll use his quirk to get a butterfly to land on your head so you can take the perfect photo for instagram

he always holds your hand in crowded areas so y’all don’t lose each other

(he would end up crying in the corner of a Hot Topic or sumn if he couldn’t find you tbh)

he writes mini-love notes v. late at night and uses his quirk to get an insect or bird to carry it up to your room

religiously takes you out on dates to the park

or library/study dates (p≧w≦q)

Rikidou Satou

acts of service but mostly to do with baking

if his s/o doesn’t like sweet treats then..it just..can’t work

he’s very good at noticing when you are down and what he bakes depends on the severity of the situation

like, if you’re just a bit bummed because you got a bad mark on a test, he’ll bake cupcakes and leave a few outside your dorm

obvs accompanied by a cute lil note abt how proud you make him and how you’re the most diligent person he’s met so he knows that you’ll succeed if you just persevere

and as soon as you come to him with your improved mark, he’ll bake you a cake with ‘congratulations, (Y/N).’ written on it

Mezou Shouji

acts of service. but like..service service

he treats you like royalty-

he is the kind of bf to give you his jacket if you’re cold

he can and will use his quirk to form more arms just so he can hold your bags along with his own

if you enter is dorm and he doesn’t offer to take your jacket immediately then i’m sorry to inform you but that is not shouji..that is toga in disguise

you’ll never have to open a door if you are walking next to him and don’t you dare even try to

just an overall gentleman tbh

sometimes you try to get him to stop being so kind bc you’re afraid ppl will think you treat him like a butler

so he’ll be like “sure ..

i’ll hold just your gym bag rather than your gym bag and school bag.”

“don’t hold any bags, shouji..”

Kyouka Jirou

her love language is definitely quality time

there is nothing she loves more than vibing with you in her room - whether y’all are studying, cuddling, playing videos games or something else - while chill music plays in the background, either from a playlist or from her playing it herself on one of her instruments

and sometimes when she’s feeling especially comfortable, she might hum a tune or sing some lyrics to match the mood

she asks you for suggestions for music to put on bc she loves introducing herself to new music

but when you’re concentrated, she doesn’t want to disturb you so she just puts on a playlist she made prior

she doesn’t create a new playlist each time you hang out but there is at least 10 new songs added to it every day

the playlist is called ‘lazy days w/ (y/n) 💕’

anyway, she just loves hanging out with you bc you’re one of the very few people who don’t annoy tf out of her

also - she’d never say it aloud but - she thinks you’ve got a very comforting presence and you make her feel so exhilarated whenever you laugh (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)

Hanta Sero

Sero loves spending as much time with you as possible - hence, he’s a quality time sorta person

but i also think he’s barely a quality time guy bc he expresses his affection in so many different ways

he’s like a mix of 4

( not gift-giving, whenever it comes time to get you gift for whatever occasion, he’s always stumped and ends up asking someone for help)

he preforms acts of service in a sense that if you are both cuddling on the couch and you are cold - even if he seriously can’t be assed to move - he’ll force himself to get up and bring you a blanket

he is really good at compliments bc he barely has a filter so if he sees you looking good, he’ll straight up tell you

plus, he loves seeing your reaction - especially when you get all flustered

and physical touch bc..cuddles :)

to him, there is just something reassuring about having you in his arms

Fumikage Tokoyami

a quality time man mwah

he doesn’t play music on speakers when y’all hang out though, he just likes to sit with you and either mindlessly chatter or chill in comfortable silence

he also doesn’t put in earbuds bc he thinks it’s rude

(you assure him that you don’t mind if he puts his earbuds in but he is always like..no..)

he just loves your company bc he seriously can’t think of somebody he’d rather spend his time with

also he is convinced that he does things 10 times better with you around

when he’s not with you though, he misses you- like- seriously

sometimes he’s just out with his friends or watching a movie with his family and he is just like ‘this’d be more fun if (Y/N) was here-’

and you said that you missed him too when y’all weren’t together

so he did the reasonable thing and made you a playlist for you to listen to whenever you missed him ( •̀ ω •́ )

he sent you the link and your heart stopped bc it was literally called ‘i love you 🖤’ AND THAT WAS THE FIRST TIME HE’S EVER TOLD YOU THAT AAAAA

‘you’re so sweet, tokoyami 🥺 i love you tooooo’

and good thing that was over text bc otherwise you would’ve seen him blushing profusely (= ╯▽╰ = )

as for the contents of the playlist; it’s probably quite diverse

some alt pop, some indie, a bit of R&B, pop rock and a lot of Metal/Rock

Shouto Todoroki

his love language is acts of service

most of them are school related though

he can easily tell if you’re struggling with the coursework and asks you if you want go on a lil study date at the library or in his dorm

he also helps you with homework or explains the material to you if you don’t understand it

and he’s the best teacher since he’s extremely patient and well-spoken

if you’re feeling under the weather, he’ll head to your dorm to fetch your notebook so he can write the class notes for you

and he’ll put in the effort to make them as similar to your other notes as he can

so he flicks through the pages and (for example) if you have a highlighting code, he’ll look for the legend and highlight the notes he took accordingly

once school is over for the day, he goes to your dorm to drop off the notebook, putting it back in the respective part of your bag

and the next day when you open your notebook to check the notes, you notice that he wrote a little note for you;

‘get well soon 💛’

it was a simple, kind gesture but the small details like how he coloured in the heart with a glittery yellow highlighter he must’ve took from your bag had you blushing (^///^)

also, whenever you’ve scheduled a study date at his dorm, there is no way in hell you’ll walk into his room and there isn’t 2 bowls of fresh soba sitting on the desk

no way. impossible.

(or if you don’t like noodles, then two bowls of rice.)

Tooru Hagakure

physical touch bb

she just likes you to know that she is there

also she loves how soft your skin is ^^

she really likes surprise hugging you from behind and you’d think that she’d be very good at that considering that she is.. invisible.. but she’s really not

she has very unique and recognisable voice

and whenever she creeps up behind you, she’s always snickering quite loudly

but you like seeing her happy when she thinks she surprised you so you just think to yourself ‘get ready to pretend to be shocked’

so as soon as she wraps her arms around you and goes ‘boo!’, you jump and always say the same stupid line you wish you would stop using but it just comes out naturally

“ope, didn’t see you there, tooru.”

but it makes her laugh every time so maybe it’s not such a bad habit

Katsuki Bakugo

he’s definitely a physical touch kinda guy but tries to be an acts of service man..y’know?

he doesn’t want you thinking that he likes hugging, cuddling, kisses or any of that none-sense bc..he is a big macho king explosion murder

and he knows that if he gets to comfortable with showing affection through physical touch, it’d become a habit then he might do it in public and the last thing he wanted was a rumour coming out that ‘king explosion murder is actually a huge cuddle-bug dork!’

so he hides it the best he can and expresses his love by like letting you wear his hoodie and not cussing you out when you do something stupid

but the fact is, nothing makes him feel better than holding you in his arms - under a blanket or not - with your face buried into his chest and your arm lazing draped over his shoulder

he usually does a good job at resisting his urge to randomly kiss you or take your hand in public

but there was that one time

luckily, it was on a date rather than on a school outing so it was only you who knows about it

it was probably around 6 months after y’all first started dating and he took you on a date to the carnival

there was a gang of boys who looked around a few years older than y’all and they were chatting amongst themselves until they approached the line you and Bakugo were waiting in (to get onto a ride at the carnival) and the group of boys stood behind you in line

at first everything was alright; they were just chatting while you were raving on about the ride to bakugo but he kinda tuned you out after he heard one of the guys say something along the lines of

“she’s kinda hot- a bit young but so fit. i think she’s from the UA too.”

that comment was enough to make his blood boil but a separate comment from one of the other guys tipped him over the edge,

“yeah and look at the guy she’s with. he’s the feral guy that needed to be put in chains at the sports festival - how embarassing.” he snickered, which was genuinely one of the most annoying noises bakugo has ever heard

his voice was low, in a whisper so they probably didn’t expect bakugo to hear it over the background noise of the carnival along with the girl yapping in his ear

but he did

and when i tell you this man was livid

in that moment he seriously considered just turning around and burning each and every one of those guys into a crisp

but the law-abiding citizen and hero inside him said no

instead, he fiercely snaked his arms around your hips to pull you into his chest and looked over his shoulders to shoot literal daggers at the guys

he led you out of the line for the ride in silence and you followed him without question - having heard the things those guys said but choosing to pretend as if you didn’t

“What was that about?” You finally asked as he brought you over to a bench, pulling you onto his lap

“Nothing.” He said, oddly calm as he stared into the void

“Okay.” You rolled your eyes, deciding not to pry as you obviously already knew what provoked him to do that. “I’m gonna go get some cotton candy then. Do you want some?”

“No.” He replied monotonously, allowing you to hop off his knee but immediately grabbing your hand, preventing you from going any farther than arms length from him.

“you needy cow.” you giggled, playfully kicking his shin, “I’m so hungry - let me go!”

“No.” He replied in the same monotone voice. “I can’t be assed to move.”

You leaned back, pulling your whole weight backwards to try get Bakugo to release his grip on your hand and eventually he gave in and got up, sluggishly following you to go get cotton candy

you gleefully popped some of the delectable fluff into your mouth before sneaking some into bakugo’s mouth too.

“are you gonna let go of my hand any time soon?” you asked, wanting to hold the bag of cotton candy for yourself but instead having one hand interlocked with his and the other being used to rip small pieces off as Bakugo held the bag in his spare hand

“No.”

[(a/n): not the over-used jealousy trope 🙊]

Izuku Midoriya

definitely a words of affirmation kinda guy

bc he knows what it’s like to have to go through life with barely anyone besides your mother telling you that your great and that you’re worthy. it’s depressing and traumatic and he wouldn’t wish that misery on his worst enemy

so he’s like your personal hypeman :)

making sure that you always feel appreciated, confident and loved

during the sports festival or anything similar, he’s always louder than the cheerleaders when it comes to your turn to shine

“GO, (Y/N)! YOU’RE SO POWERFUL, YOU CAN DO THIS! I BELIEVE IN YOU! REMEMBER TO BREATHE!”

slightly embarrassing for him but when he sees you smile confidently back at him, every ounce of embarrassment melts away and he is just filled with joy

he gets really emotional sometimes as well

but not like ‘you just faced an opponent and won bc one all your hard work and training - i am so proud of you’ sorta emotional

but like ‘omg you walked into his dorm wearing a new dress and you look really beautiful and you smiled at him so emotions wash over him and he just cries bc he realises how lucky he is to have you.’

he loves to receive words of admiration from you too though

one time you wrote him a birthday card and signed it off as ‘the future wife of the #1 pro-hero’

and as badly as you wanted to just sign it as ‘from the future pro-hero 😘’

you didn’t bc you knew how happy the other option would make him

Minoru Mineta

idk perversion ig?

wait no his love language is titties and/or ass

Momo Yaoyorozu

gift. giving.

like you have no idea how much serotonin she gets when she sees you overjoyed at gift she gives you

bc in her mind she knows that it was her that made you that happy and no amount of trophies will ever compare to how accomplished she feels for being the reason behind your smile

she’s a QUEEN 👑 UGH 😩💓

291 notes · View notes

moonbeambucky · 4 years

Text

Hey Neighbor (Epilogue)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader Word Count: 3498 Warnings: fluff

Summary: You had a plan and then life came along with one of its own. With your future almost derailed you worked hard to get yourself back on track and finally everything seemed to be going right… that is, until your new neighbor moved in.

A/N: This is it 🥺🥺 I’m so sad we’re at the end but I couldn’t be happier by all of your reactions, even when things weren’t at their best I loved hearing your screams. Now we can all cry together as we say goodbye. Thank you so much for reading their story. Btw I started a Patreon for those who would like to support me.

HEY NEIGHBOR PART 25 | HEY NEIGHBOR MASTERLIST

Breath fogs the window as you stare out of it, a grey haze has rolled over the city, the sky a sunless landscape of thick clouds and cold winds. It snowed the other day and what remains on the streets has become soot covered or murky slush. It’s nicer to stare at the white dusting on the branches of the trees below, taking in the soft peace of the afternoon.

The world has grown quieter over the past few weeks, your world at least. You can’t say the same for the hoards of people in Times Square, packed like sardines as they count down the hours for the ball to drop.

Graduation was behind you. Nearly two weeks ago you finally crossed that stage to receive your diploma. Technically the real one was still coming in the mail but it’s the symbolism that counted. All of your friends cheered as your name was called, tears of joy and relief welling up in your eyes as you did it– you finally did it!

Wanda hugged you tight afterwards, both of you letting your tears fall. She adjusted your graduation cap, decorated with a lightning bolt for Pietro. It was the first thing you did when you received your garments, to make sure a part of him was with you on such an important day. You left her arms for Peggy and Steve’s, then Sam, Natasha and Clint and then there was Bucky.

He grabbed his crutches, lifting himself up from the chair though you didn’t make him walk. A few steps closed the gap between you and you held him, your arms securing around him as a precaution as he balanced on one leg.

His smile was so beautiful as he murmured, “I’m so proud of you,” holding his gaze before you kissed tenderly, humming against his lips.

You’ve been dating ever since that day in the hospital and life couldn’t be better, especially since you and Bucky laid out some terms. From now on you would always be honest with each other, never holding back your feelings. You were a team who loved and respected each other to talk and more importantly listen.

Bucky managed well on crutches but there were still things he couldn’t do, taking for granted days he could have gone outside for a walk. Sure he had muscles, but his arms were killing him, especially on the days he had to go to the doctor for a checkup. He started physical therapy too, to keep up with strength and flexibility for the rest of his body.

It was exhausting but you were there to help him almost every step of the way. Showering was a pain though Bucky insisted on some independence, wrapping up his cast as he sat on a cold plastic chair that extended over the tub. It made him feel like he had aged 80 years but he got over it.

You did what you could to help him heal but the greatest comfort Bucky found was when you were cuddling together. He cherished those moments the most, when you held him, resting your head against his chest, or when his head was in your lap as he stretched across his couch, your fingers lazily combing through his hair.

It was the quiet moments together, crossing the threshold of intimacy in new ways. This was the slowest Bucky has ever gone since he was in middle school, swallowing a nervous gulp before asking if it was okay to hold a girl’s hand.

Life after had been a blur; his guard up, women in and out, no chance to settle, in and out, no connection, faces blend together, names are nothing more than letters on his phone for a good time, in and out. It was all noise, a constant buzzing in his head until you came into his life.

You’ve opened Bucky’s ears and the noise became sweet music. You’ve opened his heart, the melody it sings is a love song and he’s soaring. He doesn’t waste time on regrets, instead he spends each and every day getting to know you and love you in new ways.

You celebrated Thanksgiving together, with his parents coming to your apartment so Bucky didn’t have to travel. George brought most of the food over, it wasn’t barbecue but it was just as delicious. And this year you had the time to bake a pumpkin pie.

Your days were spent working at The September Foundation up until graduation. Elena hired you for Metro-General and you start there on the first Monday of the new year. Ideally, you’d like to still volunteer when you can and knowing Tony it’s something he fully supported. Things couldn’t be better.

“Doll, are you ready?”

Bucky’s voice pulled you away from the window and you climb off his bed and into his waiting arms. The basketball shorts he wears reveals his skinny left leg, paler than the other thanks to the dry flakiness he’s still working on remedying. He was in a cast for almost three months and just got it off a few days ago. You went with him, holding his hand as he beared weight on his weak muscle after so long.

He just finished the strengthening exercises he was supposed to do every day and now he needed to shower. You both did actually since tonight was Natasha and Clint’s annual New Year’s Eve party. You pull your shirt off, tossing it somewhere behind you and Bucky follows you to the bathroom. He can shower without his seat now but it doesn’t mean he didn’t want help and you happily obliged. The water ran cold by the time you actually finished and you really didn’t mind at all. Now that Bucky’s cast was off you were looking forward to getting even more physical again.

Though you showered at his place you finished getting ready at yours since you could. Living next door to your boyfriend was obviously convenient. You were able to be together and still have the space you needed. For now it worked though you can see yourself moving in together. A smile stretches across your face when you think of it, Bucky playing his music, no walls in between, a far cry from how things began.

You open your closet to find a dress that would work for the theme of this year’s party which they claimed was winter except they asked all their guests to wear either red or green. You bit your tongue, thinking that sounded more Christmas than winter but you didn’t argue, it wasn’t your party. You pulled out a crimson colored dress that had a beautiful lace overlay. The back was sheer and though it was a little short you felt it was seasonally appropriate with its long sleeves. You finished your hair and makeup, finishing off with gold chandelier earrings and peep-toe heels.

A rhythmic knock rapped at your door and you knew it was Bucky. Opening the door your jaw dropped. Maybe it was the fact that you had mostly seen him in shorts and sweatpants over the last three months, and not that he didn’t make those look good, but the outfit he was wearing now looked incredible. He looked sharp in a juniper green suit with a soft tartan design, a brighter green patterned tie stood out against his light shirt. His shoes were dark brown with a hint of mahogany that reflected in the light and even though he looked amazing you were surprised he didn’t opt for sneakers to be more comfortable with his leg.

“Fuck, you look beautiful,” he spoke first, biting his lip as he looked at you up and down.

He shaved since you left him and your hands went to cup the smooth skin of his cheek. “Not more beautiful than you.”

You pressed your lips to Bucky’s, deepening the kiss with your tongue which was probably a bad idea since it only increased your urge to rip Bucky’s suit off and take him right there. You forced yourself back from him, walking towards your couch to grab your bag.

Bucky followed you as quickly as he could considering walking still felt a little strange. His arms went around your waist pulling you closer to him as his lips began to kiss your cheek, trailing down your neck. You hummed in delight, exhaling stuttered breaths, almost losing yourself to his touch before you pulled yourself out of it.

“We can’t,” you stressed, reluctantly. “We’re gonna be late, come on.”

He sighed acceptingly, waiting for you to unplug your phone and grab your keys. Just before you were ready to leave his arms wrapped around your waist one more time and Bucky spoke before you could say anything.

“I love you, Y/N.”

The swell of your heart reached your lips as you gazed into Bucky’s eyes repeating the same words you’ve known and felt for so long. After another sweet kiss you locked up your place to take the long trip up one flight.

Clint greeted you at the door, his arms pulling you and Bucky into warm welcoming hugs. Unlike his guests, Clint was dressed in a white suit jacket, with black pants and a matching bow tie. He welcomed you into the apartment that was not filled with as many people as you expected.

There were familiar faces in your friends, including Sam who was able to take off this year. Right away Bucky teased him about his red suit calling him Elmo.

“Yeah whatever Kermit. And what about this one?” Sam teased, pointing at Steve. “That’s all you had?”

Steve blushed pink, feeling insecure about his outfit choice, a cozy forest green cable-knit sweater. “Like I’m supposed to have a fruit punch suit in my closet?”

“It’s cranberry and I look good,” Sam declared, smoothing his hands down the front of his jacket.

You let the boys continue to have fun as you said hello to Wanda and Peggy, both looking beautiful in their dresses. “Where’s Natasha?”

They shook their heads. “Haven’t seen her,” Wanda said, heading towards their marble island to grab a drink.

It was decorated with a row of mason jars, each filled a quarter of the way with coarse sugar mimicking crystal snow, with a candle in every other one and a chunk of bright red cranberries and sprays of cedar leaves sticking out of the others.

“But we just got here, so I dunno,” she finished.

You were looking around for familiar guests, surely the partners of her law firm would be coming again. An older woman sat on the couch talking to another unfamiliar face, the back of their heads glowing thanks to the curtain of twinkle lights that decorated the large walls of the living room. In the corner was their Christmas tree, a tall spruce decorated with frosted pine cone garland, matte red ornaments and thick burlap ribbon.

Clint brushed passed you, kneeling in front of the older woman who looked curiously familiar. Nervous energy was pouring off of him, from the way he kept chewing his nails to the constant tremble of his leg. He smiled as he passed you again standing near the door. With Natasha still not in sight you decided to do a little digging, by way of introducing yourself.

You walked over to the woman Clint had been speaking to, standing in front of her and the two people she was mid-conversation with. The man was big, his Santa-like belly was testing the buttons of his red shirt as it stretched across the material. His eyebrows were bushy and his brown hair was long in the front, looking a little messy as if it had been brushed through with only his fingers. He had a long beard that matched the color of his hair though it had a lot more grey in it.

The woman was beautiful. The emerald top she wore brought out the green flecks of her hazel eyes and her red lips drew you right into her beautiful smile. Her dark hair was braided with a crown, the rest of the locks falling onto her shoulders.

You caught their attention, extending your hand with a smile as you introduced yourself. The older woman spoke first, her voice as soft as a songbird as she told you her name, Edith, followed by the fact that she was Clint’s mother. Well, that explains it. You see the similarities now, the glasses she wore didn’t hide the fact that they shared the same eyes. Even her mouth was the same, thin lips that grew into the same beaming smile.

“I’m Melina,” the beautiful woman said with a Russian accent. “This is Alexei.” She pointed to the man who smiled at you. His grip was strong as he took your hand in his meaty paw. “We’re like family to Natalia,” he grinned proudly.

“It’s so nice to meet you all!” you said, sitting beside them to talk all while in the back of your mind your brain was working to put together why they were here. Sure it’s a holiday but family members have never come to Clint and Natasha’s for New Years before. In fact, Natasha doesn’t even have family. The only “family” you knew of would have to come from Russia to–

Holy shit.

You find an acceptable way out of the conversation, rushing over to Bucky and pulling him away from his conversation. Your hands are jittering with excited energy, eyes as wide as your mouth is open.

“Bucky, don’t you see what this is?!”

He looks confused for a moment before his attention is diverted. Bucky looks past you to another unfamiliar person that walked in. It’s a man with brown skin dressed in all black. A dark goatee framed his face and the straps of an eye patch secure comfortably around his hairless head. Though Bucky tried not to stare he couldn’t help but notice the veining of scars stretching out across his temple and cheek. He stands tall and silent with his arms clasped behind his back waiting.

Clint cleared his throat, a nervous smile settling on his face. “Now that everyone’s here I’d like to welcome you to… our wedding.”

Gasps of surprise fill the room with everyone rushing up towards Clint as he tries to field questions, hoping no one was truly mad at the abrupt announcement. “I knew it,” you whispered under your breath, gently slapping at Bucky’s arm.

The man in black walked towards the front of the living room, clearly the officiate who asked everyone to get settled as they were about to begin. Clint knocked once on his bedroom door, before taking his place beside the man who introduced himself as Nick.

A young woman with blonde hair slipped out of the door. She nodded to him, cracking a hint of a smile before she settled next to Melina. A moment later everyone’s eyes were drawn to the sound of the bedroom door creaking open again.

Natasha stepped out looking like a dream, in a floor length shimmering ivory gown that showed off her well sculpted shoulders with its high halter neckline, embellished with beautiful beading. She clutched a delicate bouquet of white roses and winter greens with cranberry sprigs woven throughout. Natasha walked up to Clint without fanfare, just the audible sighs of those around her admiring the back of her dress, dazzling and tasteful cut outs that showed off more of her toned body. The fabric cinched above the small of her back, a small train sweeping around her feet.

She handed her bouquet off to the blonde girl, her “sister” you presumed, remembering an old conversation with Clint. Brushing back a loose tendril from her face, Natasha smiled widely as she stared at Clint, bringing her hands forward to connect with his.

Nick began speaking and you took out your phone to capture a quick picture as the impromptu ceremony began. Bucky’s hand found yours, lacing your fingers together as you watched your friends exchange their vows.

Clint’s hands communicated his words in sync as he spoke them. “Natasha, what more can I say to the person that knows me better than I know myself. Because of you the sun shines a little brighter each day, flowers have a sweeter fragrance and my heart is filled with treasured memories. Even the not so great ones like that time in Budapest that I know we remember very differently.”

A chuckle simmers amongst the small crowd and Natasha dips her head down to laugh.

“Because of you my heart found a home, and like my stomach, it will never be empty...” Clint smiled, taking Natasha’s hands in his. “...because it will always be filled with your love, a love that I promise you I will never let go.”

Natasha sniffs, brushing aside a tear as she gathers her thoughts. “Clint, you’ve given me a second chance in life, you’ve shown me what friendship and love truly mean. I promise to trust and respect you and give you the best of myself. I promise to always fight for you, never against you, to be by your side through whatever life brings. I promise to make sure we always have snacks in the house and to clean up all the stains from your shirts when you drop food on them.”

Clint’s shoulders shrugged with acceptance as he chuckled under his breath, “It happens a lot.”

“Yes it does,” Natasha repeated, smiling wider. She exhaled a deep breath before continuing. “I promise to love you through the good times and bad and to choose our love every single day. You are my best friend, my soulmate and I'm the luckiest person on Earth to be able to call you mine.”

You felt Bucky press a kiss to your temple, leaning his head against you as the ceremony continued. When it was time Alexei dug into his pocket, pulling out the rings. With Nick’s concluding words Natasha wrapped her arms around Clint’s neck, and his held her waist; their love sealed with a kiss as everyone cheered in celebration.

They pulled back from each other, Clint resting his forehead against Natasha’s. He brought his hand up, bending his middle and ring finger into his palm. Natasha did the same, their fingertips touching as they signed “I love you” before turning to face their friends and family.

Edith was the first to hug the newly married couple who made their way through everyone until they got to you. Bucky and Clint hugged as he congratulated them. “I can’t believe this.”

“I can.” Natasha laughed, pressing her cheek to Bucky’s as they hugged. She moved to you and you wrapped your arms around her tightly. “We’ve been planning this wedding for so long it was never going to happen unless we did it this way.”

“It was perfect,” you said, pulling back from your hug with a huge smile. “Congratulations, I’m so happy for you both.”

As the night went on you formally met Yelena, the blonde who Natasha grew up with, and learned about her exciting work. You were in similar fields as she worked to free people of human trafficking, mostly young girls that were to be indoctrinated into radical terrorist groups for forced marriage or even espionage.

Her work was more hands-on as she physically raided underground bunkers or warehouses. It made you feel like you weren’t doing enough even though you knew that wasn’t true. All the years spent working towards your goal reaffirmed that, and in just a few days you’ll officially move into your office in Metro-General, across from Elena’s as you begin doing what you’ve always wanted to do, help people.

You’re lost in a comfortable stare as you look at the Christmas tree, realizing the countdown to midnight had begun.

Ten! Nine! Eight! ...

You turn around, looking for Bucky in the small room that was crowded with everyone standing so close together, huddled around the TV that showed the view from Times Square.

Seven! Six ...

The shimmering ball was descending and you were alone until….

Five! Four! ...

“Hey neighbor…” A voice called and you spun around relieved. Bucky smiled, bringing you close into his arms.

Three! Two! One! Happy New Year!

He leaned in, his lips hovering above yours, pausing as you spoke above the roar of cheers. “Have I ever told you how happy I am that you moved in here?” you purred.

“Every day. It’s like music to my ears.”

Bucky smiled tenderly, sealing the small gap between you, kissing you softly as he poured all the love from his heart out and into yours. Your hearts beat to the rhythm of your own symphony, a song that had a rocky beginning of notes that stretched high and low, but now it was a steady ballad you would continue to create together with your love.

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes fluff

848 notes · View notes

7spaceace7 · 4 years

Text

Ego Holiday Headcanons

Haven’t decided if I’ll make more after this, but here’s some festive headcanons for the Septic boys! (tagging as Yuletube for my submission for the past two missed days, hope that’s alright!)

Henrik Von Schneeplestein

-The host of the Septic Ego Holiday Celebration (est. 2017)

-STRESSED

-If he wasn’t stressed enough by being a doctor (and parent lmao), HE IS NOW

-Getting all the egos together for the holidays and making sure they DON’T kill each other?? Someone give this man an award

-Everyone keeping their limbs would be his only Christmas wish

-He does not get said Christmas wish (see: Robbie)

-Switches up his black coffee for coffee with peppermint creamer

-Chase eventually hooks him on peppermint tea instead, he knows the Doc needs sleep

-Can be found humming along to the Dance of the Sugarplum Fairy as he cooks holiday dinner

-Definitely has a “kiss the cook” apron

-Chase crossed out the “the” on it with “zhe” in sharpie

-Day 5, Schneep still hasn’t noticed

-Loves it, but still wears his doctor coat on top of it

-Gets very cold easily, so the fire is always burning

-Has a nutcracker collection

-It’s getting out of hand

Chase Brody

-Holidays are,,, hard for him

-Still sends his kids cards and presents, never actually knowing if they get them or not

-They do, I promise

-Wasn’t originally keen on celebrating with everyone, he has a tendency to self-isolate

-But once he gets there, he’s glad he did

-IMMEDIATELY tackled in a hug from Jackie

-”YOU’RE HERE!! Couldn’t start without you, dude!”

-Everyone else smiles and gives the appropriate hug

-(Anti does not, but no eye roll this time at least)

-Absolutely loves warm apple cider and has a good recipe to make his own

-Favorite Christmas movie is Elf, no I do not take criticism

-Has a soft spot for Mickey’s Once Upon A Christmas though because of his kids

-Holiday puns, you CANNOT get this man to shut up with the puns

- “Where’s Anti?” “Up to SNOW good! There’s SNOW way we can REIN him in now!”

-Once it snows, this boy is sledding down every hill in SIGHT

-Teaches Robbie how to catch snowflakes on his tongue

-Marvin makes him a “World’s Best Dad” sweater

-He totally cries and does not take it off the rest of the season

Jackieboy Man

-Christmas is his favorite holiday

-Good luck getting him to sit still around this time

-Has super strength, so he doesn’t quite have the same “don’t do that, you’ll hurt yourself” factor that everyone else does??

-Nearly giving Henrik a heart attack everytime he moves, but make it Festive™

-”Guys it’s snowing!!” “JACKIE GET ZHE FAHK OFF ZHE RAILING”

-Slides down the stairs anyway

-Marvin made him a whole ass “ugly supersuit” instead of just a sweater

-It is a w f u l, but on purpose

-Ofc Jackie adores the shit out of it

-Loves snowball fights!

-Always gets targeted by Anti tho

-Eventually it turns into a snowball war

-Pulls Chase over to tag team him, then discovers Marvin has an alliance with Anti

-They will be here a while

-Time to break out the reindeer-themed boxers

-They go along perfectly with his red and blue sweater-suit

-Eventually able to settle down when it gets dark out, bonus points if there’s hot chocolate involved (courtesy of JJ)

-Don’t forget the marshmallows

-Wants to help everybody out with their plans, always does his best

-Even if his best includes falling off a roof

Marvin the Magnificent

-Made everyone sweaters, even Anti

-Spent too much time on the design parts to make em perfect, so he had to rush getting them all sewn

-Uses his magic to sew like three at once

-December 1st, 12:00am is when the Christmas music starts

-Mariah Carey impressions that slowly get higher as the month goes on

-Performs a “Let It Go” rendition that could rival Idina’s during christmas karaoke night

-Switches his regular mask for his holiday one with snowflakes instead of card suits on it

-The decorating master, with JJ as his apprentice

-Favorite part is designing for the lights outside

-Learned a spell to make it look like it’s snowing inside

-Forgot to learn the spell to make it stop snowing inside

-Ended up just sticking with those paper snowflakes dangling on the ceiling

-Asks Jackie for help with the lights on the roof, not because he can’t easily do it himself, he just knows that Jackie likes to help and this is the one thing he knows he can’t break

-Did not expect Jackie to break himself by falling off the roof instead

-Ends up finishing the lights with his magic anyway (after he untangles his boyfriend from the lights, that is)

-Can and will destroy Jackie during snowball fights just because he can

Jameson Jackson

-THIS BOY oh this boy

-Brings out the classic holiday music and sets it up on the gramophone

-LOVES making up dances to the music

-May be a classic boy, but his guilty pleasure is Michael Buble

-(Robbie calls him bubbles whenever he comes on)

-Goes ALL OUT with the holiday baking

-Cookies of all kinds, homemade gingerbread for the houses, so many pies, even learns how to bake his own bread

-Everyone agrees that his pumpkin bread is the best

-Anti especially loves the cherry pie for “aesthetic purposes”

-Has a whole “Twas the Night Before Christmas” puppet show routine

-His job is making the decorations while Marvin sets them all up, it’s a great dynamic

-Definitely makes those traditional popcorn garlands for the tree

-for some reason puts an orange in his stocking?? The others are confused, but he’s so excited so they just let him do his thing

-Now everyone has oranges in their stockings

-They still don’t know what it means

Antisepticeye

-Die Hard is a Christmas movie, dammit!

- “Grinch Bitch” is what his sweater from Marvin says

-Secretly likes it, but fuck off

-Wears it to sleep every night in Winter

-You know that thing where cats get under Christmas trees and swat at the ornaments? Yeah that’s him

-Loves the white elephant gift game

-Ends up getting a present and it’s a turtle

-His name is knives

-KING OF SNOWBALL FIGHTS

-Fills his snowballs with fake blood so they explode on people

- (at least we hope its fake)

-If it doesn’t snow enough, he is the bitch who throws water balloons instead

-Henrik still has work leading up to Christmas, so Anti listens to him rant when he gets home

-Christmas patients are fuckin crazy and he loves it

-One time fell asleep and woke up with a red nose and antlers

-Chase was never safe after that

-Kept the antlers though, they jingle

-Saved them all from Chase’s puns that day

- “Where’s Anti?” *distant, staticky jingling* “Ah there he is”

Robbie the Zombie

-LIGHTS...pretty lights…

-He loves the lights, and will try to eat them if you’re not careful

-Says they’re static candy

-Doesn’t get cold because he can’t feel it, so he often wanders around in the snow

-One time he came home without his left foot and Schneep nearly had a heart attack

-Turns out it froze in the snow and snapped off his leg

-The Great Foot Search Party of 2020

-Please don’t forget to bundle this boy up before going out

-Anti has knitted him a hat and scarf for just this reason

-Henrik was the Proudest Dad that day

-Totally gets to put the star on the Christmas tree every year

-Marvin levitates him high enough

-Favorite holiday movie is The Polar Express

-One time JJ came out with his signature hot cocoa during the movie scene and Robbie was THRILLED

-Talking almost knocked him over thrilled

-Tries to sing along to holiday music, the lyrics don’t work out much

-Really good at keeping a beat though

-Marvin made him a sweater with bells on it

-Adores the bells, flaps the too long sleeves to make them jingle

Shawn Flynn

-Likes Christmas, but like lowkey

-He’s a toymaker!!! He makes adorable toys for all the egos as their presents from him!!

-Didn’t really have a family to go back to in his days at Joey Drew Studios, so he was used to spending Christmas alone, usually working

-NOT ANYMORE!

-Now he has Too Much Family (but in the good way)

-Absolutely gets nicknamed Scrooge at first, probably because he really likes A Christmas Carol and he’s a grump

-Often can be found being pulled off to dance by the gramophone with JJ

-He’s got two left feet, but JJ doesn’t really care

-If anyone still believes in Santa, even just a little bit, it’s because of him

-Has a giant red sack that he fills up with toys he’s made and/or the ones no one could sell back at the studios and donates them to orphanages

-Usually sticks to his old timey clothes, but when he does wear modern Christmas attire like the sweaters, he has,,,no idea how to match things

-It’s ‘cause he’s red/green colorblind

-once asked why Marvin had “yellow” hair

-JJ makes sure that his decorations have lots of blues so it’s not so much strain on his eyes

#yuletube2020 #yuletube #jse egos #henrik von schneeplestein #chase brody #marvin the magnificent #jackieboy man #shawn flynn #jameson jackson #antisepticeye #my writing #prompt list #Headcanons

236 notes · View notes

girlgrouptrash101 · 3 years

Text

Cooking with Loona

Request: "i know requests are closed and i’m reallyyy sorryyyy 🥺 i’ve been going through a lot and i just didn’t have time and didn’t feel right enough to ask this: maybe cooking with loona??"

A/N: to the anonnie that requested this, i hope you're feeling better and ily ❤️❤️

(had to put a keep reading tab cuz the post was too damn long f)

- C

Heejin:

we’ve all seen the cement brownie she tried to give to chuu on her birthday vlive..... yeah....

she always skips like half the steps when she’s following recipes and then gets confused when her food doesn’t turn out the same like,, Heejins sweetie pleASE-

lowkey can’t cook but she thinks she can because you hype her up too much

like she will serve you a dish that will somehow be both burnt and cold at the same time and you still tell her she did amazing because it makes her so happy and that’s all that matters

your guys’ favourite thing to make together is probably cupcakes or cakes

because you get to bake them and Heejin gets to decorate them, and they always end up looking and tasting immaculate

everything in your guys’ relationship works better when you’re together, you two simply complete each other :’)

Hyunjin:

not only does she make the most kickass bread but girlie really is a chef of all cuisines too

you still don’t know how or where she even learned to cook so well but you aren’t complaining at all

whatever you feel like eating, Hyunjin knows how to cook it to absolute perfection and she always offers to teach you how to make your favourite dishes

you two also have matching yellow cat aprons uwu

the kind of girl to either kick you out of her kitchen for distracting her while she’s making a meal or else back hug you and help you stir a bowl with her hand over yours all romantically

it literally just depends what mood she’s in at that very moment

highkey loves loves loves cooking for you and surprising you with dinner after a long day, because her favourite thing to do is put a smile on your face :D

Haseul:

starts off really strong and sticks to the recipe... but then her mind wanders and she's like,,, well,,, what if i add this????

and you're like haseul,,,, please don't put chilli peppers in Kim lips birthday cake, i promise she can do without them,,,,,

she finds cooking in the dorms a bit stressful, doing her best to feed the hungry members after a long day of practice

so cooking with you tends to be a much more therapeutic experience, just you two, a bit of music and some tasty treats

but she of course brings back plenty of wonderful bakes for her members to enjoy too, they're literally her babies she is can't just let them STARVE 😔🙄😢

lowkey pretends she's having trouble stirring so you'll reach from the back and help her with the spoon all romantically

miss haseul you are not slick we SEE YOU

Yeojin:

yes she did in fact bejewel her cookery book

"yeojin... I can't even read the recipes, there's too much glitter!!"

"Well Y/N, sometimes, sacrifices have to be made in the name of beauty."

said sacrifices are usually cupcakes and cakes that don't rise, burnt food or just complete mush that doesn't even look like food

however, when yeojin is fully dedicated she can pack a mean lunch, sometimes she makes them for you when you're going off to school/work, and she always makes sure presentation is A+

prefers to just go out to cafes/restaurants on dates rather than cook

but that doesn't mean there haven't been times where you and her have been in the kitchen at 2am, trying to make a gigantic cake for you and all her members to share 😌

Vivi:

has the most peaceful, lofi cooking playlist ever

you two work in harmony, always helping one another but never tripping over the other in the kitchen

it's so harmonious it's like.... y'all were meant to be or sumn idk 😳😳😳

however if u try to eat any batter she will smack ur hand and be like no ⛔ that is for LATER hfhdhd

her hair always gets tied up in the cutest little bun when she's baking, and that along with her fairy apron makes her look like an actual princess

she also LOVES cooking/teaching you how to make her favourite foods from Hong Kong that she'd always make with her mom

those meals always help her when she's homesick, and with you by her side make her feel like she's not alone 🥺

Kim Lip:

CEO of pretending she has everything under control when in reality she has absolutely no idea what’s going on

“Uhhh Jungeun, is something burning?” “NOPE NOPE IDK WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT HA HA HA........”

wants to put your apron on you every time but she’s always way too shy to ask so she just resorts to back-hugging you until you get the hint and let her tie a cute little bow behind your back with the apron string hehe

makes pretty decent food when she’s not flailing around and panicking over a single grain of rice that escaped from the pot or something

however she refuses to admit when she messes up in the kitchen

like she could burn something to a crisp or use completely the wrong ingredients but she’d still eat every bite just to prove she’s the best cook in the house

if your food sucks she will tell you to your face, followed by a kiss so you forget about the fact she just roasted your cooking skills lol

Jinsoul:

Jinsoul gives off Hawaiian shirt drunk uncle at the family barbecue vibes who won't let anyone near the steaks

and you're like,, Jinsoul do you even know what you're doing????????? to which she responds - "food, heat, it's cooking. isn't that all i need to know?"

chaotic but refuses to acknowledge the chaos she causes in the kitchen

so when you have baking dates u have to keep such a close eye on her to make sure she isn't going to poison anyone with her creations

once she gets into it tho, she's grooving around the kitchen in her little robot apron, dancing to Christmas songs when it's not even Christmas and just 10/10 having a blast

not really the biggest fan of cooking but she knows you are, and since you help her build her gundams she does like to try and help our properly in the kitchen when she can

perhaps Jinsoul best girl???? perhaps??????

Choerry:

hello this sunshine absolutely LOVES baking, especially for others because putting a smile on someone's face is her main goal in life

she loves decorating with icing too, her go to patterns are smiley faces, flowers and the sun!

her playlists are always so upbeat, the two of you end up bouncing around the kitchen singing at the top of your lungs as you work

LOVES LOVES LOOOOOVES backhugs, especially recieving them,,, it makes her feel all worm and mushy inside hehe

also likes to kiss face icing off of your face, just to have an excuse to give you as many little pecks as she so desires

choerry always makes you a birthday cake every year, and she puts so much work into it, it absolutely melts your heart

plus it makes her happy to see you eating well and having a good time, she truly just is the biggest sweetheart :']

Yves:

she always says yes whenever you ask her to cook with you, but only because she just wants to flirt with you for an hour

"why do we need to make all this food, when the real snack is right in front of me? 😏"

cooking with you actually really does make her happy though, she loves that she can be so domestic with you, it's such an amazing break from her hectic life

also lowkey makes her feel like you're a married couple... and you best believe Yves can't wait to wife you up

she doesn't suck at cooking, but has often times gotten,,, ahem,,,, somewhat distracted and has prioritized making out with you against the kitchen counter rather than how long the food has been cooking, which ends up in a lot of burnt meals

baking with her is really a time, and has more than once ended in a very messy food fight because Yves wouldn't stop smearing icing all over your face 💔

her specialty is dialing the local takeaway and ordering food instead ✨ okay Yves Ramsey go off ✨

Chuu:

this baby girl is just torn between actually wanting to cook or just asking you to cook with her so she can get affection from you (as if she doesn't get that anyway smh)

backhugs except she won't let go

whenever she's making something she calls you over and she's like "Y/N is this okay?" and always asks for kisses as a reward for doing good

will feed you every single ingredient no questions asked

she loves surprising you with meals on very random occasions though, for example that one time she cooked your favourite food because it was the anniversary of the first time she got sick while dating you

she's actually a pretty good cook when she puts her mind to it though, she loves making good food that'll cheer people up when they really need it

btw you will be forced to wear matching aprons and they will be the pinkest, loudest and sparkliest ones that she can get her hands on ✨

Go Won:

have the fire service on speed dial before you even think about cooking with gowon omg

you literally also need to have indestructible tastebuds because she WILL destroy them

her speciality is starting fires and combining foods that were NEVER. EVER. E V E R. meant to be combined 😭😭

"babe come try this dish!! it's ramen mixed with coca cola, jelly and vegetable soup!!! it tastes GREAT trust me"

at the end of the day you just leave her be in the kitchen because at least she's having fun LMAO

(just always have a fire hydrant by your side okay??? she set the loona dorm on fire making chicken nuggets once...)

despite all her chaos, she somehow always produces something edible at the end and.... sometimes it actually tastes good too???

Olivia Hye:

lets you do all the work cuz she's worried she "might mess it up" when in reality she just wants to order takeout and cuddle instead smhhh

will probably follow you around the kitchen or rest her head on your shoulder while you do all the cooking, because this tsundere is secretly the biggest softie for you

she's actually a decent chef when she's motivated to help though

like she even put together a cooking playlist for you guys - which she very shyly revealed to you one time, a slight blush on her cheeks as she played the songs for you

cuz miss olhye is very much a romantic, she just doesn't have the confidence to show you all that yet hehe

her favourite is making desserts because well,,,, she gets to eat the batter and also gets tasty treats at the end

10/10 cooking backhugs also 🖐️😌

170 notes · View notes

annabethy · 3 years

Text

under the mistletoe, watching the fire glow day 24: christmas carols

Character A doesn’t feel the Christmas spirit but Character B, who lives above them, keeps playing Christmas carols really loud,, percabeth

Annabeth has never been one to thoroughly enjoy the holidays. She doesn’t necessarily have anything against them, but they’re just not for her. They never have been, for as long as she can remember.

She didn’t get any presents when she was little. Her family did the bare minimum for Christmas. There might have been a tree with the blandest decorations, but that was it. So she grew up with a rather distasteful opinion towards Christmas too. To be fair, it’s more to do with her family than the actual holiday itself, but there’s an association, and now she can’t stand either.

That’s why she decided to move away from California as fast as possible. She graduated high school and booked it, not looking back since. And it was difficult surviving in New York City without any financial support, especially as a college student, but she managed. She worked hard and found a decent apartment.

Or she had thought she found a decent apartment, but there’s ear-shattering Christmas carols playing above her head that cause her to rethink that particular detail.

“You’re kidding me,” she mutters as another starts to play. It’s not even muffled – that’s how loud the music is, and she genuinely doesn’t understand how another person can be so oblivious.

She tries to brush it off for the better part of an hour, assuming that someone else would ask them to shut up, but nothing happens. If anything, it gets worse because the Christmas carols get louder and more unbearable.

An hour finally passes and her willpower fades.

Annabeth tugs on a jacket and slides her feet into the first shoes she sees. She’s vaguely aware of moving around with much more aggression than the situation calls for, but now the person above her seems to have started singing along, and she thinks that violence is the only language this person understands.

It only takes a few seconds of knocking at their door before it swings open. The person she now knows is a guy has a smile on his face that quickly falls when he takes in her own face.

“Hey,” he starts, eyes roaming her face. “Are you okay?”

“Actually, I’m not,” she says. “I think my brain may be hemorrhaging.”

She can see his face morph into confusion. His green eyes actually look a bit concerned for her as he scratches his neck. “What do you mean?”

“Your music is so loud it’s making my brain bleed,” she snaps. “Can you just, you know, have some consideration for those around you and turn it down?”

“My music is too loud?”

“It’s giving me a headache, so I don’t know how you haven’t gone deaf yet.”

“But… they’re Christmas carols.”

“Yeah, I was able to hear that. Because they were loud.” “You don’t like Christmas carols?” He asks it with such passion that she thinks he’ll be seriously offended if she says no.

“I think Christmas carols are a disgrace to humanity.”

He actually gasps, a hand over his heart, but there’s a subtle grin on his face that lets her know he’s only messing with her. “I am so sorry for you.”

Annabeth’s jaw drops slightly. “Sorry for me? I’m sorry that you have horrible music taste.”

He holds his hands up in mock surrender. “You don’t even know me, so how could you possibly know I have bad music taste?”

“I’ve been listening to you blast music for an hour, so trust me when I saw I know.”

He laughs. “Come on, you have to at least give me a chance to prove you wrong.”

“Prove me wrong?”

“To show you I have amazing music taste, and that Christmas carols are the best things to exist.”

She watches as his eyes trace over her, and she can practically sense the approval in his eyes. It makes her heat up just a little bit, and she crosses her arms over herself. “How do you plan on proving that to me?”

“You could come in and I will give you a three hour long monologue about the history of carols and their importance to the Christmas culture.”

She blinks.

“Or you could come in and help me make a gingerbread house while singing Christmas carols with me,” he suggests.

“You’re inviting a stranger into your apartment? What if I were a serial killer?”

“Jokes on you because I don’t have any cereal in my apartment.”

It takes her a moment to get the joke before she snorts at its pure lameness.

“At least let me make up for destroying your brain,” he says, opening the door wider.

“I still don’t know your name.”

“I’m Percy,” he says as though it makes up for everything else.

He’s funny, she decides. “Annabeth.”

He lifts the side of his lips in a lopsided smile. He doesn’t say anything else, simply stepping aside to let her in. She can’t believe she’s actually considering walking into a stranger’s apartment, but then she remembers that he was blasting Christmas carols, so how dangerous could he really be?

She walks inside and the music seems to increase tenfold. He goes to lower the volume from his phone, and it offers immediate relief as the pounding in her eardrums stop.

“Is that better?” he asks.

“The volume is better,” she says, “but the music is still abhorrent.”

“You take that back.”

Annabeth laughs softly as she joins him at the counter. There’s a gingerbread house out and in complete shambles. There is also piped frosting, and it gives her the impression that this is not his first attempt at this.

She looks up at him and finds his eyes already on her. It’s not in a rude way — he seems to be more intrigued by her than anything, and she doesn’t blame him. They’ve lived right next to each other, yet they’ve never met before. She’s just as fascinated by him and his distasteful melodies.

“You wouldn’t happen to be good at gingerbread houses, would you?” he asks, hopeful.

“Actually, I happen to be a competitive gingerbread house maker.”

“Really?”

“I’m an architect,” she tells him, twisting the plate with the house on them. “And I make a mean gingerbread house.”

“Please help me.”

“Why do you even need to make this?”

“I was bored because all my friends went home for Christmas, so I figured why not make a gingerbread house except I can’t get the sides of the house to stick for shit.”

“Enough said.” With that, Annabeth ties her hair up in an impromptu bun, grabbing the frosting from the counter. She truly did not come up to his apartment with any intention other than to make him feel pain for the suffering he’s caused, but then he presented her with this challenge, and she just couldn’t resist.

She certainly didn’t intent on liking it in his apartment either. He’s super kind she learns quickly. He offers her a helping hand and complements her every move, and he’s generally a very inclusive person. He asks her questions about herself and seems to be genuinely interested in her answers. It’s subtle, but in the back of her mind she thinks that she really likes him.

It’s mortifying that it happens in the span of one night, but even the three hours spent with them attempting to piece together a masterpiece (and baking more pieces at Annabeth’s request so that they can recreate a mansion) she finds herself laughing more than she has in months.

“I can’t believe you’re actually this good at making gingerbread houses,” he comments, leaning in close as she pipes an individual icicle onto the roof of it.

“I’m not sure what you expected from an architect.”

“Yeah, but… the person who just happens to come so they can murder me is exactly who I needed. You know what they call that?”

“Coincidence?”

“A Christmas miracle!”

She rolls her eyes, setting the icing down. “I’m only here for the decorating.”

“And because I need to show you that Christmas music is a blessing,” he reminds her. “It’s not possible.”

“It is, actually, because while you’ve been decorating, you’ve also been doing this little dance.

She freezes, just now realizing what she was doing. “I have not.”

“You have,” he says. “It’s cute.”

“I would simply never dance to Christmas music because I hate Christmas.”

“What reason could you possibly have for hating Christmas?”

“I never got to put the star on top of the tree.”

“Is that it?” Percy rolls his eyes. “You can put the star on top of my tree.”

Annabeth’s heart immediately jumps up, and she can’t stop the smile that spreads across her face. It’s so silly, putting a star on top of the tree, but it’s made her so excited for some reason.

“Do you want to?”

“It’s okay,” she says, keeping her voice steady. He smiles softly, grabbing her hand and dragging her away from the kitchen counter. His tree is small in the corner of the living room, and it’s mostly decorated. There is a box of ornaments sitting on a table besides him that lets her know he just hasn’t gotten the chance to finish decorating, and the star is beside it. He picks it up and hands it to her, an amused look on his face.

“Here,” he says.

She crosses her arms. “I’m not doing it if you’re going to laugh at me.”

“I’m not laughing at you!” he assures.

“You’re laughing right now.”

“Because it’s adorable. Come on. Please?”

She gives him a last look before setting the star on top of the tree. It’s a bit taller than her so she has to stand on her toes and lean over it, and he steadies her with a hand on her waist. She takes a step back to look at it. It’s a bit crooked, but as she goes to fix it, he stops her.

“Leave it. It’s perfect.”

“It’s crooked.”

“That’s the point of Christmas! It doesn’t need to be perfect. It’s supposed to be warm and fun and leave you with that fuzzy feeling.”

Annabeth definitely feels that fuzzy feeling, but it’s not from the tree. It’s from the look he’s giving her that makes her face blush.

“You’re not going anywhere for Christmas, are you?”

She glances at him. “No. Why?”

“I just assumed because you said your family wasn’t the best. But I don’t think you should be alone for Christmas.”

“You’re alone for Christmas,” she points out.

“And I was trying to blast music to forget that little fact. It wasn’t working very well, but now you’re here!” She smirks.

“I think you should come over tomorrow so that neither of us have to be alone on Christmas.”

“I don’t want to intrude, Percy.”

“You’ve been here for hours now, and I’ve loved every second of it.” He elbows her lightly. “Come on. We can even make another gingerbread house.”

“I do love making gingerbread houses,” she says with a smile morphing into her face.

“Also I kind of like you.”

“Even if I came here with the intention of yelling at you?”

“To be fair, you did yell at me. I just thought you were cute and invited you in anyways, and you came in so you must also think I’m cute.”

“I think there might be a flaw in your logic there.”

“But am I wrong?”

She doesn’t answer because he’s not wrong. He’s sweeter than frosting, and he’s looking at her with such adoration that she really doesn’t want to leave and be alone on Christmas. Now she doesn’t have to.

“I’ll stay,” she playfully concedes, “if you really want me to.”

“I do.”

“But only on two conditions,” she says.

“And what are those conditions?”

“One, you have to put on some good Christmas music.” “What do you mean good Christmas music!”

“And two,” she starts, laughing at his bewildered expression, “Kiss me.”

That gets him to laugh, throwing his head back. “A kiss?”

“A kiss,” she confirms. “After all, you think I’m ‘cute.’”

His fingers curl around her waist. “You’re very cute. My cute neighbor.”

“And if you kiss me, then… maybe it can be more than just a cute neighbor.”

She knows she’s pushing her luck, but she’s always been good at reading people, and she can read him. She knows he feels the same thing she is. His eyes burn bright.

“If you say so,” he whispers, pulling her in and kissing her hard. It takes her breath away, and she wonders how she’s missed someone right in front of her.

Hours earlier, she’d been upset that he was playing music so loud, but now…

She’d never tell him, but she thinks she might like Christmas carols.

#percy jackson #annabeth chase #percabeth #pjo #percy jackson and the olympians #my writing

133 notes · View notes

pradaksj · 3 years

Text

ghostin || part 2 (finale). (m.)

↳do not repost, translate, or claim as your own.

❧ summary ⟶ ❝Though I wish he were here instead. Don't want that living in your head, he just comes to visit me when I'm dreaming every now and then. ❞

❧ pairing⟶ seokjin/reader

❧ genre⟶ angst, angst, and angst … did i say angst? + a bit of fluff? friends to lovers.

❧ word count ⟶ 18,000+

❧ warnings ⟶ major character death! sad ending. descriptions of grieving process.

❧ part of the ⟶ thank u, next series

part 1 || part 2 (final)

“H-He did the right thing,” Jimin stutters, and you were sure he hardly even believed what was coming out of his own mouth,“What he did was selfless,”he declares.

“No he broke my grandma’s heart!” Jia scowls at Jimin, “What a jerk…” she huffs, having been fully engrossed in your story.

“No he’s right,” you say, shocking Jia, “It was an act of complete selflessness and in a sense, I applaud him for being able to do it because God knows I wouldn’t have been able to,” you sigh, “But ask yourself Jimin, in a week from now would you regret it?”

He looks as if he’s about to nod his no, until you add to your question, “How about a year? Maybe two? What about three? Just how sure are you about it?”

He remains silent.

“Tell you what Jimin,” you pause, “Only if you’re one hundred percent sure that you’d have absolutely no and I mean zero regrets about your decision then go ahead and leave,” you say, and he looks at you in a confusing manner, “You heard me, you can get up and leave right now, but,” you add emphasis to the word, “if you have even the slightest bit of a doubt, then all I ask of you is to hear this story till its end.”

Jimin, who by now had grabbed his jacket from the table in preparation to leave, now hesitated. Before you went up to him, he was so sure he wouldn’t regret it… but now after hearing a part of this story of yours… that confidence was long gone. Because if history truly was repeating itself, then he wanted to know the ending to this tale.

And so remaining in his seat, a look of determination covered his face.

“Okay then,” you mutter, ready to continue.

“That night I had cried in that diner for what felt like hours. It wasn’t until the waitress had to tell me that they’d be closing soon that I remembered I was far from Seoul, and so instead I went to my parents’ house and spent the night crying in my mom’s arms. I didn’t tell her right away, but I knew that she had known. Because honestly why else would I cry that hard.

Still though, I kept my mouth shut about it for the week that I slept over there, thinking deep down in my heart that he’d come back and tell me it was all a big mistake. Because if he did, I would’ve forgiven him. Maybe give him the silent treatment for a bit, hell even make him beg a bit, but I would’ve still forgiven him nonetheless.

When I went back to Seoul, I stayed in the same apartment. I paid the same expensive rent despite there only being one person living in there now. I stayed there because every afternoon I’d come back from work with a tiny feeling of hope that when I’d walk in, I’d find him in the kitchen like I always did after work, eating God knows what.

Sadly it never happened....

In the beginning I’d have no problem visiting my parents in their home, that continuous hopeful side in me thinking I’d be able to magically see Jin at his parent’s house.

In reality the only person I’d occasionally see was his mother, who greeted me the same way she always did, acting as if nothing happened. I’m sure Seokjin must’ve told her through a phone call, but yet like the amazing person she was, she never asked me any questions about it. Never uttered his name around me, instead asking about trivial things like my career and such.

With no update on where Seokjin was, or what he was doing, it was only a matter of time in which I’d realize that things just weren't going to play out like how I imagined them to. The charming prince in my story had truly left.

Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months, and soon months turned into years. I stopped visiting my parents house as much, and ultimately began to ask them if they could come out to Seoul to visit me rather than the other way around. As going home only served as a reminder for me of what I had lost. No… of what had left me.

And so after about two years of being single, I finally began to date people for the first time in my life, until soon enough I met someone by the name of Seojun. Though it wasn’t exactly love at first sight, it was definitely my first serious relationship since my break up with Seokjin, and slowly I really did fall in love.

I had successfully forgotten about Seokjin.

At least I thought I did ….

I guess this brings us to where our story begins to end….

1999.

“My loneliness is killing me,” you whisk the batter of the cake you were making, “and iiiii,” the shiny ring placed on your left ring finger shines even under the kitchen light, “I must confess I still believe,” you pause for a moment, “I still believe,” you horribly sing the ad-lib to Britney Spears’ chart topper of a song, “...Baby One More Time”.

Out of nowhere, the music on the radio is turned down, “I think that’s enough whisking y/n,” your mom chuckles, “any more and you’ll over mix it.”

Sighing, you follow your mom’s orders.

Today was Christmas, and like every other year, you were spending it at home with your parents. Your fiancé, Seojun, who was out of town to celebrate the holiday with his family as well, would arrive in two days. It was the best compromise the two of you could make, with the agreement that the roles would be reversed for the following year.

Taking out the baked bread she had put in an hour earlier, she immediately sets it down on the cooling rack placed on the table, “You’re going to have to take these to Mrs. Kim right now,” she mentions, while cutting the bread into slices.

Silently, you nod, ignoring the drop in your stomach that you’d feel whenever you had to interact with anything that forced you to remember him.

Despite you successfully managing to forget about him in terms of your daily life, Kim Seokjin just wasn’t someone you could ever completely forget. No matter how much you wanted to.

Wrapping parchment paper around the pieces, you help your mom tie the cute little pieces of red string around it, her belief of presentation adding to the flavor still ringing true to this day.

She inspects them one more time before placing them into the woven basket decorated with many other Christmas like things, along with the two gifts she bought for the twins, “Make sure you remind her about coming over tomorrow with the kids.”

Nodding, you place your coat on and begin to make your way out, “And tell her I said Merry Christmas!”

Making a motion with your hand that you heard her well, you close the door before she can add anything else.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

“Ah y/n,” Mrs. Kim greets, pulling you in for a hug, “Merry Christmas,” she says.

“Merry Christmas Mrs. Kim,” you smile at her, handing her the basket.

“Come in, come in,” she insists, and reluctantly you do, “I swear everytime I see you it feels like I’m only getting older,” she chuckles, “You don’t want something to drink? Maybe some wine—”

Laughing at her enthusiasm, you say “It’s fine Mrs. Kim,” while looking around the place. She had done an amazing job at decorating this year, not like she never did, “Where’s Mr. Kim?” you ask in curiosity.

“Ah he’s not coming till later, had some paperwork he wanted to finish up at work,” she explains, and you nod in understanding.

“Merry Christmas!” two voices simultaneously yell, and immediately you're met with a giant hug from the two twins.

Eyes widening at how big they had gotten, a smile covers your face, “Now I’m the one who feels like I’m getting old,” you comment, resulting in Mrs. Kim to laugh.

The two, who had to be at least 13 years old by now, were definitely going through the phases of puberty by now.

Ruffling their hair, you recall how baby-faced they once were, only imagining how different they’d look in a couple years time.

Minjun, who now sported braces, was the first to speak, “Woah, it feels like we haven’t seen you in forever!”

Yeonha adds on, “Yeah! You’ve gotten so….” she stops herself from continuing, but you know what she wants to say.

“Old,” you finish for her, pretending to be angry by placing your hands on your hips.

She awkwardly laughs, scratching her neck, a habit she must’ve picked up from her older brother, “Of course not!” she tries to play it off.

“I’m only 25, turning 26 in a couple of weeks if you really wanna be specific, but that doesn’t make me old little lady!” you scold.

She raises her hands to her defense, while Minjun comes to her rescue, “I think the word she was looking for was mature,” he says, “I mean you’re dressed like those office ladies we see on TV,” and you’re unsure if the comparison was supposed to be a good or bad thing, but nevertheless you change the topic, not wanting to fluster them any more than they already were.

“So any gifts you two are wanting this year?” and immediately Yeonha’s face lights up at the question.

Eagerly she nods her head, “I think Santa,” she sends her mom a mischievous look, “is getting me a new beeper this Christmas,”

Mrs. Kim playfully rolls her eyes.

“Santa heard from a little birdy that your old beeper wasn’t stolen, but got dropped in water,” Mrs. Kim comments, and immediately Yeonha’s face pales.

She turns to her twin brother and smacks him in shoulder, “Hey!” he yelps, “it wasn’t me!” he scowls, “It was probably Jin,” and even by a single utter of his name, you feel your heart begin to race, “I swear, it’s like you purposely forget what you tell him on the phone sometimes,” Minjun continues to ramble on, clearly upset by the accusation of being the snitch.

“I think I should get going,” you suddenly interrupt.

“Oh but you just got here,” Mrs. Kim says, failing to notice why you were suddenly feeling uncomfortable.

“Yeah!” Yeonha adds for support, “Jin’s supposed to get here any second now,” she wiggles her brows, even after all these years, still clearly unaware of the circumstances for your breakup.

Mrs. Kim looks surprised at Yeonha’s sudden announcement, “He was supposed to get here at 8,” she mumbles, a wave of guilt washing over her.

You send her a sympathetic look, knowing that it wasn’t her intention to put you in an uncomfortable position, “I’ll see you all soon, I promise,” you say, and Mrs. Kim now barely notices the ring on your finger. A subtle gasp escaping from her lips.

With your hand on the handle, you begin to open the door, “And Merry Christm—”

Stomach dropping at the sight in front of you, you feel as if a semi-truck had hit you, rendering you at a loss for words, “Y-Y/N?”

The first thing you notice about him is the length of his hair. It seemed as if he had grown it back into the mullet he first had when you met him, only this time it suited the mature aura he seemed to have.

Dressed in a black turtleneck, matched with black pants and dress shoes, you weren’t sure if you were in shock because he was right in front of you for the first time in nearly 3 years or because of how easy it was for him to get your heart racing.

It was weird really, despite his change in appearance, for some reason even now you were sure that he was still the same old Seokjin you’d always known.

Noting that you’d been staring at him in silence for quite a while, you finally manage to spew something out, “S-Seokjin,” is all you manage to stutter under your breath.

The twins share a troublesome look to one another, “Come on you two, Mom made Pajeon,” Yeonha says, pulling the two of you by your respective hands and forcing you both inside, “We can all eat and catch up,” she smiles wide and big, “I’m sure you two would love that,” she winks.

“I d-don’t,” you attempt to say something, but too flustered for your own good, you remain in shock.

Glancing at Mrs. Kim, you notice the contemplative look on her face, as if she was debating with herself in terms of what to do.

Making up her mind, she announces, “I’ll get the plates ready,” much to your dread.

Awkwardly, the two of you are seated across from another, the tension in the room only building as you wait for the food.

“Soooo……” Yeonha breaks the silence that fills the room, “What have you two been up to?” she glances at the two of you, waiting for a response.

Feeling a knot in your stomach, you continue to remain silent.

It also didn’t help that Seokjin’s gaze had remained on you this whole time. It was as if he was studying you, analyzing you the same way you had done to him. He wanted to see if you had changed.

Feigning a cough, he ultimately speaks. “Shouldn’t you already know Yeonha,” he questions her, “unless you haven’t been listening whenever we talk on the phone…”

Her face reddens, “Of course I have! You just went to Taiwan recently to consult for some business company and do those boring analyses you always do.”

He shakes his head, “Then there’s your answer,” he simply states.

“Business? So he really did end up giving up on his dream ….” you think to yourself, a bit saddened at the fact. A part of you always assumed that Jin had left you to be well on his way to stardom, that when he left you that night, he truly was being the selfish person he claimed he wanted to be.

“Y/N? …” the sound of your name being repeated brings you back to reality.

For a moment you look confused, “I said what about you?” and for the first time since your breakup, both you and Jin make eye contact, easily taking your breath away.

Face reddening, you take a while to respond, “I um—” flustering with your words , you continue, “I’m um— the head writer at the same company I worked at years ago,” you force an awkward smile on your face.

“Oh…” Jin says, “Do you like it over there?” and the question brings you back to that first car ride to the diner when you had just moved to town. His delivery of the question still as blunt as before.

“Um yeah …” you reply, fidgeting with your fingers.

He genuinely smiles, “I’m glad,” he says, “really I am,” he adds for extra comfort.

And before you could say thank you, his mother enters the dining room, the plate of Pajeon in her hand, along with other side dishes, “Here you kids go,” she places the things on the table, “Make sure you eat it while it’s hot,” she warns before making her way back into the kitchen.

It’s only until you grab the piece of Pajeon with your chopsticks that he finally notices it.

He finally notices the shiny diamond ring you sport on your left index finger.

“You’re engaged,” he suddenly announces says , face unreadable.

As if the room wasn’t awkward enough….

Gulping, you nod, “Yeah,” you exhale, “it happened a couple of months ago,” you add.

The two of you stare at each other in silence, “I’m happy for you,” he gives you a small smile. Silently patting his mouth with a napkin, he gets up from his seat, “Well I just came back from a pretty long flight so I’m pretty tired, so I think I’m gonna head upstairs,” he avoids eye contact for a moment, a sign that he was lying, “Jet lag you know?” he awkwardly laughs, “But it was nice seeing you y/n…”

Getting up as well, you decide that it was best you left as well.

“Merry Christmas y/n,” he says one final time before heading up stairs.

“Merry Christmas to you too Seokjin,” you whisper under your breath.

“Since our breakup three years before, Seokjin had never once gone back home for Christmas, which was why I felt so sure that he wouldn’t that year, but of course I was wrong. So when I told my mom she immediately began to panic for me, remembering that she invited Mrs. Kim to come over the next day, and well of course she didn’t want to be rude and rescind her invitation.

And so I told my mom that it was fine. Whether Seokjin decided he wanted to come over or not, I’d be just fine. At least that’s what I tried convincing myself of…”

“Seokjin, we’re going to be headed our way now,” Mrs. Kim yells over the blasting music. God, did Jin feel like a teenager again. “If you change your mind well … we’ll be right next door!”

He hears her footsteps going down the stairs, signalling that she was gone.

Engaged …. You were really engaged ….

The image of the ring on your finger was the only thing that remained in his mind the night before, and it was what was haunting him even now.

He wasn’t sure what came over him, you were happy, you had found love in someone else just like he’d hoped for years ago.

He should’ve been ecstatic for you … but he wasn’t.

Several questions pondered in his mind once he saw it. Who was the guy? How did you meet? When were you sure you loved him? Was he treating you better than he ever did? Could he give you the future you always wanted? Just how happy were you?

Sighing, he gets up from bed, not wanting to sulk for any longer.

He had to do something, anything, for the meanwhile that he was back home to get his mind off of this. And so grabbing his jacket, he prepares to leave, unsure of just how long he could be in the same proximity as you without doing something he’d regret.

The sounds of crickets chirping fills the air, a wine glass in your hand as you look at the stars above in the sky from the comfort of your front porch.

Inside, your parents were talking about the most mundane of things with Jin’s parents, while the kids were busy preoccupying themselves playing with their newly gifted Nintendo 64. And after getting tired of constantly losing to them, here you were, taking a break from the chaos going on inside.

Seojun was arriving tomorrow, from there you’d only be here for the remainder of the weekend and then back home to your apartment in Seoul, as if nothing ever happened. Ever since yesterday, something was eating at you. You just weren’t sure what. And the only thing you could look at to ease your anxiousness was the ring on your finger, a solid reminder that you had a future to look forward to and that the past was buried six feet under.

Taking a gulp of the drink in your hand, you mentally curse Jin. Why did he have to return? Out of all years, this had to be the one he chose to magically come back in? “Damn you Seok—”

“Y/N?” you look up to see the person you were just damning, car keys in hand. It looked as if he was originally planning on going somewhere, but must’ve walked over here once he saw you sitting here by yourself.

“Seokjin,” you say, a mixture of both shock and displeasure evident in your voice.

Relief washes over him when hearing your response because unbeknownst to you, from afar you looked as if you were completely knocked out, a result of the position you were in while you were deeply thinking. Immediately he eyes the wine glass in front of you, everything beginning to make sense.

“You looked um—” shaking his head, he disregards what he was going to say, “Sorry I’ll just get going.”

And maybe it was the wine talking, but rather than keep quiet and watch him leave, you call out to him, “You can—” you hesitate to continue, “You can sit here if you want,” you say, “that’s only if you want to of course, I’m not forcing you to do anything you don’t want to because I’m not exactly physically capable of doing that and—”

Jin interrupts your tipsy rambling by sitting at an appropriate distance from you, a soft chuckle escaping from his lips, “You always did like getting drunk off wine,” he whispers under his breath, a small smile on his lips.

For a while, the two of you remain in silence, simply staring at the view above. That was of course until you asked him a simple question, “Where were you going?” you mumble.

Bringing his attention towards you, his eyes soften, “Just wanted some fresh air,” he simply answers, being completely truthful.

Silently you nod, “Mm that’s good,” you say, your cheeks a soft tinge of red because of the wine.

“So…”

“So…” you mimic him, causing him to playfully roll his eyes.

“How have you been?” he attempts to break the ice, “I realized I didn’t really ask you that yesterday…”

It was funny really, the two of you truly had become strangers in a sense, just like how he said you two would be that night. But in a way, it also made things more interesting, it was as if he was getting the chance to know you for the second time in his life.

“I’ve been..” you hesitate to find the right word, ultimately deciding on the simplest one you knew, “I’ve been good,” you say, “I’m doing something I love, have an apartment I completely adore, and I found someone—” you stop yourself from continuing.

“You found someone you love?” he says for you, and silently you nod, remaining silent for a moment.

“Why did you—” you pause before continuing, “Why did you become a businessman?” you ask, the question having been on your mind since the day before.

Casually, he shrugs, “There was no future in the world of entertainment for me y/n,” he states, “so I went back to college, worked my ass off, and got a degree in financial accounting. From there the job offers came pretty easily and now I’m a traveling business analyst.”

“Did you do it because of your da—”

He’s quick to nod his head no, “I did it for—,” and at the last second he changes what he was originally going to say, “I did it for myself,” and you feel yourself getting angry.

“But it wasn’t what you dreamed of, it wasn’t something you loved!” you unintentionally shout.

“Hey hey hey,” he places a hand on your shoulder, “any louder and the whole neighborhood will hear you,” he attempts to joke around, and you feel your face get redder than it already was.

Letting go of your shoulder, he looks back up to the stars, his voice becoming soft, “The night I told you about wanting to seriously pursue becoming a director, you told me that if I failed, the real question would be if I’d be able to accept it…” your gaze falls on him while he continues to look up into the sky, “At first I wasn’t able to… I was too ashamed to admit to failure, but—” he smiles, “when I finally did, it almost felt liberating. And so I realized sometimes you have to give up the things you love, for a better shot at a future.”

Bullshit.

Complete bullshit.

That’s what you want to say to him.

And so you do.

“That’s complete utter bullshit Seokjin,” you mutter, taking a sip of your drink, “because if it isn’t then that makes you a selfish person, and you’re the farthest thing from selfish. So that’s just bullshit and you know it.”

He laughs, “It is, isn't it?”

Not expecting him to agree, you look at him in shock before grouchily looking away, focusing your gaze on anything but him.

Failing to hear the brief sharp hissing sound of his zipper being pulled down, you suddenly feel the placement of his sweater over your shoulders. You furrow your brows in confusion, “You’re shivering like a chihuahua,” he explains, scratching his neck like he always did whenever he was nervous.

Crossing your arms, you attempt to hide your face which you were sure by now was as red as a tomato. What the hell were you doing? Sitting here talking to your ex boyfriend of 6 years while your fianceé was probably well on his way here… it was wrong, it was inappropriate. So then if you knew that then why did it feel so … you brush the thought off before you could complete it.

“Because he was your friend first and as much as you hate to admit it, he'll always mean something to you…” you tell yourself, feeling guilty at the thought.

“Y/N?” he says your name, bringing you back to reality.

You look at him, wondering why he said your name out of the blue.

“Do you—” it was now his turn to hesitate, “Do you hate me?” he finally asks, and immediately your mind says no. You could never hate him, even if you wanted to.

He stares at you, anxiously waiting for a response.

“No I don’t.” you simply say, not bothering to elaborate any further, but for Jin that was enough. It was enough to tell him that you still …

“Seojun…” you whisper under your breath, a car pulling into the driveway of your house, a look of surprise on your face. Immediately you push off the jacket from your shoulders, catching Seokjin by surprise.

“So this is who he is…” Jin thinks to himself, watching the handsome man come out of the car, a grin on his face as he locks eyes with you.

Walking towards him, Jin watches as you lovingly greet the man with a kiss to the cheek, the two of you then walking towards him. “Seojun this is Seokjin, his parents are the neighbors,” Seojun offers his hand out, a polite smile on his face, “Seokjin this is Seojun, my fianceé,” the two shake hands. Your past and present finally meeting.

“Seokjin which means to be a great treasure,” Seojun attempts to make small conversation.

“He’s a linguist,” you explain, awkwardly chuckling, noting the fake smile on Seokjin’s face.

“Mm I see,” he mumbles, bitterness in his voice.

“I thought you weren’t coming till tomorrow?” you ask your fianceé, still surprised by his sudden appearance.

He shrugs, “What can I say, I got bored,” he laughs, “So I said my goodbyes early, and decided why not come here to surprise you,” he kisses your forehead, and Jin feels the green eyed monster making its way out.

“Well I should get going,” Jin states.

“You sure?” you widen your eyes at Seojun’s sudden question, “I mean I love your dad y/n but it’d be nice to have someone else to talk to,” he chuckles, “and well I definitely wanna hear about what y/n was like as a teenager from someone who isn’t one of her parents.”

You and Jin both make awkward eye contact, unsure of what to say. “Maybe some other time,” Jin manages to say, “I have to um…” he flusters, “um..”

“Finish typing up that business report you were talking about,” you make an excuse for him.

He snaps his fingers, pretending that that was what he was trying to say, “Mmhmm yeah!” he scratches his neck, “My job just doesn’t want me resting, not even for the holidays, you know how it is...” he adds on, coming for the Actor of the Year award at next year's Oscars.

Seojun surprisingly believes it, “Damn, that’s too bad,” he scratches his chin, a sign that he was thinking of something, “Well are you coming to our engagement party? Maybe we can talk then,” he says, and if your eyes weren’t already wide enough, by now they were well on their way to falling onto the floor. Seojun was just too kind for his own good.

Jin practically chokes on his own spit, “I um—”

Realizing that you probably forgot to invite him, Seojun interrupts before Jin could feel any more embarrassed, “January 12, at the Lotte Hotel in Seoul, 6PM sharp.”

Feeling his face get red, Seokjin nods, “Yeah I’ll be there,” he forces a laugh.

Patting his shoulder, Seojun smiles, “I look forward to talking to you then,” he says, beginning to make his way inside, with you following closely behind, a guilt-ridden look on your face.

Now by himself, Jin silently cursed to himself. Damn him! Seojun wasn’t at all the asshole Seokjin made him out to be in his head. But damn did he want him to be one…. then it’d be much easier to hate the man, and it’d make him much less guilty for what he was planning to do….

“After that night, I’d go to sleep scared. Not because I was in danger in anything, but because I was scared about the feelings I’d repressed for so long now starting to return. I was scared of looking back…”

Patting down your black fitted cocktail dress, you look at yourself in the mirror for a final time, “Everything is going to be just fine,” you whisper to yourself, having cooped yourself in the ladies restroom for quite some time now.

You couldn’t help it, the moment you saw the twins walk in with Jin’s mother, you knew it was only a matter of time before Jin walked in.

Ever since that Christmas weekend, his sudden return into your life had been eating you alive. You had gotten over him, you were sure of it. No … you are over him. Point. Blank.

This ring you wore on your finger signified that you were over him, that there was a different future to look forward to now. That whatever was meant to be in the past was no longer an option for you now. Right?

The door suddenly opens, “Y/N, there you are!” your mom comes in with an upset look on her face, “the host of the party can’t just disappear whenever she wants to,” she scolds.

Staring at her with a doe eyed look, you want to tell her everything. Everything that you were currently feeling, every question, every doubt that was crossing your mind since Jin’s return. But instead you just look away, making your way out.

“Taiwan huh? I’ve always wanted to visit there,” you hear your future brother-in-law, Hoseok, say.

He, along with Seojun, Seokjin, and some other guests were currently discussing God knows what in a social circle.

“Y/N,” Seojun calls out to you, a grin on his face.

Immediately you make eye contact with Jin, feeling your every movement being scrutinized under his gaze.

Sucking it up, you plaster a smile onto your face, reminding yourself that in a couple of hours you’d be in bed, with the only other times you’d have to see Jin being your rehearsal dinner, which was the night before the wedding, and the wedding day itself. And even then he would just have to be another face in the crowd of guests.

Seojun places a kiss to your cheek, “Jin was just talking about his adventures in Taiwan, I’m thinking it might be a good destination for our honeymoon,” he says with genuine excitement in his tone. Oh how naive he was…

“Oh…” is all you can say, struggling to keep the smile on your face, “um yeah, I guess that would be a nice place to go, wouldn’t it?” you attempt to stay engaged with the conversation, and it seemed as if it was enough to fool Seojun because soon he was talking about something else with another guest.

But clearly it wasn’t enough to fool Jin, as he currently had his gaze fixed on you, occasionally taking a sip out of the glass of whiskey in his hand.

“I think I’m gonna go out and get a breath of fresh air,” you whisper to Seojun’s ear, and silently he nods, distracted by the conversation he was currently having.

Going out, you make sure not to be seen by your mother, knowing that she’d only scold you again for trying to leave. And so like the cowardly person you were, all you could do was hide and wait in the hotel’s little garden, sitting on the stone bench, the smell of the flowers somewhat relaxing you.

God, did you just want this night to be over already…

“You shouldn’t have come here,” you suddenly say, feeling the presence of someone behind you, but you knew exactly who it was.

“You looked sad,” you hear Jin say, genuine concern in his voice.

You remain silent.

Sighing, he sits next to you, the moonlight framing his face in such a way that he almost looks ethereal. “Originally I wasn’t going to,” he says, understanding the double meaning to your words, for you meant that he shouldn’t have came to this event at all, “But I needed to see it with my own eyes, confirm that it wasn’t just some—”

“What? Some joke?” you scoff, “Some wretched attempt at getting over you…”

Now it was his turn to remain silent.

You shake your head, “3 years Seokjin,” you say, “3 years you were gone and you just had to come back the year I get engaged,” you bitterly chuckle, wishing you had a drink in your hand, “funny how life works huh?”

Silently he nods, agreeing with you, “I guess it was just a natural sense,” he attempts to joke around, but you remain silent, “I’m sorry,” he randomly says and you look at him confused, “For coming back,” he elaborates on the apology, “if I’d known beforehand I wouldn’t have come back to town for both of our sakes,” he chuckles, being completely honest.

“Hand me that,” you motion to the drink in his hand, and without question he does. Taking a giant gulp, you then finally say something, “I’m getting married in 6 months Seokjin,” you remind him of your future fate, “it was going to happen before you came back, and it’s happening even after,” you turn to face him, wanting to make sure he understood that at this very moment you were placing a line between you two, one that you hoped was unbreakable.

He returns to stare, “I know y/n,” he simply responds.

“Do you?” your face twists into a frown, “Because I know you Seokjin and something in my gut is telling me that—”

“Y/N I know,” he repeats, “but just answer one thing for me…” he pauses, contemplating on whether to continue but does so anyway, “Do you really love him?”

And just as you’re about to respond, he interrupts, “But I mean genuinely y/n, enough where you really can picture the rest of your life with him with absolutely no regrets, no what if’s…” he adds.

Could you? You ask yourself. Could you really imagine being with Seojun with no regrets…..

To Jin, your silence was enough of an answer, but before he could get a word in, a voice suddenly interrupts, “Y/N!” Seojun calls out, “There you are,” he exhales a relieved sigh, “We’re about to cut the cake,” he glances at Jin, nodding as a way of saying hello.

“Oh right ...” you get up from the bench, a black cloud hanging over your head, “I’ll see you at the wedding Seokjin,” you look at Jin a final time, the statement ultimately acting as your answer.

“The six months went by in the blink of an eye, but each and every night when I went to bed, it ate me alive.

The lies I was telling my fianceé, the lies I was telling myself, everything was just becoming too much.

And as the date loomed closer and closer, it was only getting worse. And so the night before the rehearsal dinner I finally came clean…”

Staring up at the ceiling of your bedroom, you’d become accustomed to the sleepless nights for the last six months, faint lines beginning to form under your eyes.

In less than 48 hours you’d be a married woman, welcoming a future you’d always wanted. So then why was it now, you still couldn’t get a wink of sleep.

“Wedding jitters?” you hear Seojun whisper beside you, and you find yourself shocked that he was still awake. Usually he was quick to fall asleep, a deep sleeper as well, so to find him awake was pretty unusual.

You remain silent, hoping he’d just fall asleep, but like the caring person he was, he softly nudges you despite knowing that you were ignoring him, “Seojun, go to sleep, it’s late,” you mumble in the darkness, reminding you of a memory from long ago.

“Something’s bothering you,” he says, now turning to face you, and he nudges you a second time, “You know you can tell me anything…” he adds, wanting to reassure you.

This was your chance, your chance to tell him everything before it was too late. It was speak now or forever hold your peace, and so sighing, you position yourself to sit up, turning on the bedside lamp.

“Seojun I haven’t been completely honest with you…” you announce, now avoiding eye contact. “And well you deserve to know the truth because you’re an amazing person who deserves nothing but the bes—”

“Y/N,” he interrupts you, a soft laugh emitting from his lips, “I know Seokjin is your ex, and I know he still loves you,” he drops the bombshell of news on you, and you could’ve sworn you felt your jaw hit the floor.

“W-wait w-w-what?” you manage to breathe out, and it only makes him laugh again.

He now sits up, nodding his head, “I knew the moment you introduced his parents as the neighbors rather than calling him an old friend,” he chuckles, “you were trying to make it seem a little too platonic,” your face squirms, “and well you’re not exactly the best liar,” he pauses, “Plus your mom isn’t exactly a quiet speaker so when I heard her rambling to your dad about the situation, I sorta just knew.”

“T-then why didn’t you call me out on it?” you immediately ask, but before he could respond, you continue to ramble, “God, I’m so sorry Seojun,” tears well up in your eyes, “I love you, I really do,” you say, completely truthful, “but I-I-I—” you struggle to continue.

“But you also love him,” he completes for you, a look of understanding on his face.

Immediately you nod your head no, “No I don’t it’s just—”

“Y/N it’s fine,” he says, grabbing your hand, but you still refuse to admit it.

“No Seojun, you don’t get it. I love you, I do, more than you ever know and I’m ready to start our future together but—” you look away, “as much as I hate to admit it I’m always going to feel something for him because he was my first love,” you whisper the last part, “but you’re my last,” you reaffirm.

Seojun smiles sadly before sighing, “I know, which is why I sorta just let it be that night at the engagement party because well... I figured that if you were able to make it to the aisle without turning back it meant that you truly did love me,” he pauses, “Because even now you have the choice to turn back y/n, you do understand that right? I won’t be mad, I won’t be too sad, and I won’t hate you for it because I understand,” he says and you feel a teardrop fall from your eye, “that night I overheard him ask you if you really loved me and though you didn’t immediately say yes, you also didn’t flat out say no. And so it seems you’re at a crossroad… ” he whispers.

“Seojun…”

He squeezes your hand, “When you step on that aisle then I’ll have no doubt that you’ve completely unregrettably chosen me,” he says, “and if you don’t then I’ll know you were just never meant to be mine,” he smiles softly.

A silence follows.

“Tomorrow he’s going to the rehearsal dinner, and I’m assuming it’ll act as his hail mary. His final attempt at getting you back,” he suddenly says, “and so it’ll be your time to make a decision … a future with me or a look back at the past with Seokjin,” and he kisses your cheek, his way of saying goodnight before making himself comfortable in bed again, quickly falling asleep, and leaving you in the same sleepless state you were already in before.

He was right, knowing Seokjin tomorrow he was going to do something because you were 100% sure that he would never grow the balls to object to the matrimony in front of everyone. And so as the clock kept ticking, it was only up to you to decide your future.

“The next night came quicker than expected. After all of the guest greetings and pretentious conversations I had to make, it was time for the guests to make a toast. By then I had already made a decision in my mind, I just didn’t expect everything to happen the way it did….

For over the last 50 years I’ve constantly looked back at that night and have asked myself where it went wrong, what could’ve gone differently, what if this, and what if that… as it was never meant to escalate to the point it reached...

But it did … and as much I would love to go back in time and change everything, I can’t. And that’s just something I’ve had to accept, no matter how much it hurts…”

Clink. Clink. Clink.

You eye Jin as he gets up from his seat, his glass of sparkling water in his hand.

You’d been avoiding him like the plague the whole night, just wanting to get to the wedding day as soon as possible.

You attempt to remain calm.

He wouldn’t do it, not here in front of everyone. If he really cared for you like you believed him to, then he wouldn’t.

You knew Jin, and he was the kind of person to pull you to the side or find you alone like at the night of the engagement party in order to tell you something. Never would he stoop so low to do something like this…

Feigning a cough, he speaks, “I want to make this as quick as possible, don’t want to take too much of everyone’s time,” Jin’s mother glances at yours, the two of them unsure of what was going on, “So where do I begin…” Seojun looks at you with an impassive expression, your conversation from the night before coming to fruition, “Ahh I know,” Jin snaps his fingers, “So for anyone who doesn’t know, I actually dated y/n first…”

“Seokjin,” his mother attempts to stop him by harshly whispering his name, but he relents.

“We dated for about 6 years actually, to a point where we sure that we’d spend the rest of our lives together,” he scoffs, “but then I ruined that by breaking up with her,” he reminds you and everyone else around you of the fateful night, “which I know is shitty of me to realize just now how much of a mistake it was. But I mean what are the chances that I come back the year you’re about to get engaged, I mean that has to mean something right?” he rambles, almost as if talking to himself, convincing himself that this was the right thing to do.

Everyone sits in shock of the words spewing out of his mouth, certain that this was only something that happened in movies, never imagining that it could actually happen in real life, “I’m only saying this now because I realize it’d be even more of a dick move of me to object in front of everyone,” he chuckles to himself, “And so I’m doing this now, in front of everyone y/n…” he locks eyes with you, “I’m sorry,” he whispers, “but this is our last chance, a final shot at the future you’ve always wanted... with me.”

The silence in the room was deafening.

Slowly you get up, a heavy feeling weighing down your chest as you clear your throat before speaking, “I know this is a lot to ask but if everyone can get up and momentarily leave the room, I’d really appreciate it,” you announce, “I’d like to talk to my friend privately for a moment,” you look down to Seojun who nods understandingly.

Without question, Seojun begins to lead everyone out, until ultimately it was only you and Seokjin standing by yourselves, a scene all too familiar to you.

“Y/N…” he begins, but you’re quick to cut him off, your hand placed on your temple.

“Why?” your voice breaks, any emotion you’d been withholding beginning to unravel, “Just why?” is all you’re able to ask.

“Because you don’t love him y/n,” he whispers loud enough for you to hear, and it’s at hearing that, that you feel a shift in mood.

“But I do Seokjin!” you yell, seeing nothing but red now.

Silence momentarily lingers in the air, until you scoff.

“What were you thinking, Seokjin? That you could just come back into my life and I’d welcome you back with open arms?” you ask, tears welling up in your eyes, threatening to fall with every word you got out.

He shakes his head, “No but—” he hesitates, walking closer to you, “what are the chances y/n? What are the chances I come back to town the year you’re getting married—”

“The only reason I’m getting married to someone else is because you left me!” you interrupt him, reminding him of the choice he made years ago.

He looks away, “You don’t get it y/n,” he mumbles under his breath, beginning to grow frustrated.

“What’s there not to get Seokjin?” you push at him, now yelling, “If I hadn’t gone looking for you that night, I would’ve been left with nothing but a goddamn note—”

“I was doing what was best for you!” he yells in return.

“For me?” your voice shakes, “Leaving me at a diner in the middle of the goddamn night with some poor excuse wasn’t the best for me! Leaving me to cry in bed, by myself, for almost 2 years straight wasn’t the best for me! Leaving me, not knowing where the hell you were for almost 3 years wasn’t the best for me!” you finally explode, years and years of anger now revealing itself.

“Everything I had felt, the sadness, the anger, the frustration, everything … was finally being released…”

“I begged for you that night Seokjin, begged!” you emphasize, the tears that had been building up, now falling hysterically.

“I was just trying to do what was best for you,” he says, completely and wholeheartedly honest, because it was true. At the time he really was doing it all for you, and you understood that now, truly you did.

“But I just couldn’t let it go… I was still hurt, and that hurt was what was holding me back. That hurt was what was preventing me from walking out the back door with him, ready to finally start that future with him I always wanted…”

“I didn’t need you to do anything for me!” you yell, “I was a grown woman Seokjin! Capable of making my own decisions, just like I am now!” your heartbeat slows down, “I gave you my heart that night Jin!” your voice cracks, not only feeling your heart break for the second time in your life, but all by the same person, “It was you who left me! Not me, you!”

“Because I didn’t want to hold you back y/n,” his voice breaks, “Because at the time I couldn’t give you the things you wanted.”

“And I told you I didn’t care!” you cry out, “Because for me all that mattered was being by your side…” a silence follows, “You were my first love Seokjin,” you breathe out, “the first boy to make me feel completely and unconditionally loved and so for that I thank you,” you say, “I really do…” you grab his hand, “but this—” you struggle to say the words.

“But this is the end,” a tear falls down from his eye, and you can only stare at him in sadness.

“I’m choosing Seojun, completely and unregrettably,” you whisper, placing a final soft kiss to his cheek, “I’m sorry,” I’m sorry for being unable to let go, is what you want to say.

“So then I should go,” he quietly says, and silently you nod, letting go of his hand in the process.

And he watches you as you walk away, “Y/N,” he says your name for a final time and you turn around, sadness still etched in your face.

There’s a brief silence before he continues.

“Live—” he hesitates, “Live a life you’ll be proud of,” he reminds you, and to that you send him a small smile. A chapter in your life coming to its end.

“And so the next day was the wedding....”

“How are you feeling y/n?” your mom comes up to you from behind, practically feeling just as nervous as you were.

You pat down your dress, sighing in the process. Ever since last night, there was a churning feeling in your stomach that had been bothering you, but you reasoned with yourself that it must’ve been due to the events of the night prior, “Nervous but I should be good to go,” you respond, and your mom gives you a smile of reassurance.

Curious to see how many guests had arrived already, you look out the window of the room you were in, which gave a perfect view of the venue. Scanning across, it seemed like everyone was here except…

“Where’s Mrs. Kim?” you ask, “and the twins?”

After last night’s events, Mrs. Kim had gone up to you frantically apologizing for her son’s behavior, rambling about understanding if you didn’t want her at the wedding anymore, but you were quick to tell her that it was fine. That just because Jin did what he did, didn’t mean you didn’t want her attending. Which was why now seeing her seat empty along with the twins’, you were not only confused but a little hurt.

“Maybe they’re stuck in traffic,” she reasons, “they did leave quite late,” she adds.

Deciding it was best not to dwell on it too much, you push it to the back of your mind, “Let’s get this show on the road,” you ultimately say, ready to get married.

“You have to remember that in the early 2000’s, not everyone had mobile phones yet because of how expensive they were. People were still used to calling a house phone by memory and crossing their fingers that you’d pick up. You couldn’t just send a text message to absolutely anyone whenever something of importance happened…” you explain, your voice beginning to shake, “you couldn’t inform someone of an emergency until God knows when,” a tear falls from your eye, “Because if you could, then—” you let out a heart wrenching sob.

“Grandma?” Jia says in concern.

“Then I would’ve never gone through with that wedding…”

Seokjin was tired, no … he was exhausted.

God, was he such an idiot. What the hell was he thinking doing that? You were right, did he really think he could just waltz back into your life and everything would just go back what it once was? And to see you cry like that only made him realize even more of what a complete selfish asshole he was.

But at least, you both found closure right? That was all that—

The sound of Seokjin’s car engine making an ugly noise breaks him away from his thoughts. Almost immediately, he pulls over to the side of the road, purposely stopping near a payphone for reference.

Grabbing the flashlight from his compartment box, he gets out of the car and lifts up the hood of the car.

“Hmm...” he hums, nothing seemed wrong. It was probably just his car’s way of saying that it needed to be replaced by a newer model soon.

He smiles, tapping the hood once he placed it back down. He’s had this thing since his first year in college, it being by his side almost as long as you had been, if not more.

Yawning, he gets back in the car, the need to fall asleep becoming a little too overwhelming. Placing the key back in the keyhole, he turns it in order to turn on the ignition, but to his surprise the car refuses to start, “Come on LadyBug,” he says, the name of the car being something you and him both made up on a drunken whim, it sticking ever since.

Deciding to be stubborn tonight, LadyBug relents.

Sighing he grabs his Nokia phone from the glove compartment, the giant words of “NO SIGNAL” only making him sigh more. He just wanted to go home and sleep already.

Getting out of the car once more, he walks towards the phone booth, inserts a quarter, and dials the number of his parent’s house phone. As much as he hated to ask for help, desperate times called for desperate measures, and his dad should be home.

“You have reached the voicemail box of 45x-7x8-87xx, please leave a message after the beep. Beeeeeep,” the automated voice instructs.

Seokjin groans, maybe his dad was asleep, “Hey dad, I’m sorta stranded out here with a car that doesn’t seem to want to start and well … I think Mom is still at the rehearsal dinner with the twins,” Seokjin begins to ramble, “She’s probably on her way back home, but you know her,” he chuckles, scratching his neck, “she still refuses to get a mobile phone so there’s really no way of calling her till she gets home,” despite his father not being on the line, he still felt awkward asking him for a favor, “I’m on interstate 6, you know … the usual route to get from Gwacheon to Seoul. Well, I’m gonna try calling someone else just in case you’re asleep… bye,” he hangs up the phone, disappointed that he was going to be stuck here longer than he hoped for.

Who else could he call, hmmm.

Ah! Yoongi! Hell maybe even Taehyung or Namjoon! Though it’d been a while since he last saw them, he was sure they’d be willing to do him the favor.

Quickly dialing their numbers one after another, he’s met with the same automated message of, “We’re sorry, you have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service. If you feel you have reached this recording in error, please check your number and try your call again.”

“Damn, they probably changed numbers,” Seokjin mumbles to himself, unsure of what to do.

Glancing at the time in his watch, he realizes just how late it was. Who else could he call….

The image of you appears in his mind, but he’s quick to shake his head no. He was the last person who could call to ask for a favor, but damn was your number the only number he had left in his memory.

And it wasn’t like he could sleep in his car for the night, that was only an invitation to get robbed on the side of the road.

He needed some kind of help, and quickly at that. And the chances that you were already home were pretty high, never being much of a partier to begin with.

“Fuck it,” he mutters, promising himself that this would be the last time he ever asked you for anything. He could only hope that you still lived in the same apartment….

“We should really start heading back home,” you whisper to Seojun’s ear, the rehearsal dinner having only awkwardly resumed about an hour or two ago. Things were barely beginning to get comfortable again among the guests, not like you could really blame them, they had just witnessed something that looked like it came out of a movie.

“Y/N,” he chuckles, “Have some fun,” he says, as this was probably your 10th time saying this in the last hour, “You deserve it,” he tries to convince you, your whole mood having gone sour since the whole mishap.

Sighing, you look away shyly, “I don’t know Seojun—”

“Come onnnn,” he teases, gently pulling you into a hug, “Just one more hour.”

You roll your eyes, “Hm fine,” you say, easily convinced, “but only one,” you reaffirm.

He nods, “only one.”

“Hello, we are currently either sleeping or—Jin I’m making the message for the voicemail thingy majiggy—” the sound of a high pitched laugh in the background is heard, and Jin remembers how he had been poking fun at you for using your “I mean business” voice, “as I was saying, we are currently either sleeping or at work! Sorry we couldn’t reach your call at this time, but please please please leave a message after the beep and we’ll make sure to get back to you as soon as we can! You ready? Beeeeeep!”

Jin laughs at how silly you sounded, surprised that you hadn’t changed the message in the last 3 years. It probably meant you had no reason to, considering it was pretty rare that you didn’t pick up a phone.

Meaning maybe you weren’t picking up on purpose….

Jin shakes his head, reminding himself that he was calling on a payphone and that there was no way you could see it was him. It was just self doubt getting to him.

“Hey y/n it’s me um Seokjin,” he awkwardly laughs, “I know I don’t really deserve to be asking you for a favor right now, but um,” he exhales a deep breath, “I’m sorta stranded right now and well I tried calling everyone else I could think of at the top of my head, I swear, but no one picks up,” he wants to make sure you understand that you really were his last option, “I promise that after this it’ll be the last time you see or hear of me, but I’m just really tired and well I just wanna go home and sleep. So if you can, I’ll be on interstate 6 with LadyBug,” he chuckles, “Um …” he’s unsure of how to end the voicemail, “I’ll see you soon then… bye ….”

Sighing, he walks back to his car, deciding he was going to try one more time before officially giving up. Twisting the key, he could only cross his fingers that it’d start up.

Vrooom.

A toothy grin appears on Jin’s face as he childishly celebrates, “Oh thank God,” he whispers to himself, rubbing his eyes and preparing himself for the drive ahead.

“Y/N,” your mom calls out to you from the dance floor, a shock ridden expression on her face, “Y/N!” she yells again, this time grabbing your attention.

“What is it mom?” you ask, unaware of the severity of what she was about to tell you.

“We need to go outside, I—” she seems out of breath, “I need to tell you something,” her voice shakes, and an immediate concern covers your face.

“Right now?” you ask, confused as to what could be so important that she needed to tell you at this very moment, in the middle of your wedding reception.

Silently she nods, leading you outside, her hand intertwined with yours. Your dad, with a solemn expression on his face, follows not too far behind.

“Something’s happened y/n…” she begins, voice wavering, “It’s about Seokjin…”

Inaudible words are spoken.

And soon you fall to the ground, the shock paralyzing you in such a way that you were sure this had to be some cruel nightmare, the sound of silent muffled sobs escaping your lips and filling the air.

A tragic story coming to its end.

“He died that night driving,” you hauntingly say, “A car had swerved into the opposite lane, and he was just too tired,” your voice shakes, “He didn’t see it in time,” tears fall down your eyes, “He died that night thinking I didn’t love him when in reality I loved him more than ever before. I was just too prideful to admit it,” you wipe the tears from your cheeks.

Jimin and Jia were at a loss for words, shock running through their veins, their eyes wet with their own tears, “You-You’re lying…” Jimin’s voice breaks, unable to comprehend what you had just told them.

“His mom didn’t get the call from the police until she got home, and even then she immediately rushed to the hospital, clinging onto the tiny bit of hope that he’d be just fine,” you shake your head, lips quivering at the recollection of everything, “She told my mom the next by calling my dad’s travel phone, felt like as a close friend … I deserved to know.”

“Grandma…” Jia says weakly.

“I always ask myself what if I hadn’t agreed to stay that extra hour that night. What if I had gone home like I should’ve and heard that voicemail? Because if I had, I would’ve gone to go get him without even a second thought. But like I said, I’ve just had to accept that what happened happened, and there’s nothing I could do to change that.”

Seojun gently knocks on your bedroom door, dressed in an all black suit, “Y/N…” he softly says your name, “Today’s the funeral… you,” he pauses, “you have to get up…” his voice is gentle, but firm, “You—” he hesitates, “You have to go y/n, you have to say goodbye,” he whispers.

He hears you attempt to muffle your sobs, just like you had been for every night of the last month. But in a room full of utter silence, it was almost impossible not to hear you.

“Y/N…” he slowly enters the dark room, heart breaking at the sight of you aimlessly staring at the ceiling. Sitting beside you, he begins to gently run his hand through your hair, an effort to comfort you.

But the heartfelt action only makes you sob harder, reminding you of the person you had lost, “I—” you barely croak the words out, “I just want to sleep,” you whisper, because you knew that it was only in your dreams that this wretched reality no longer existed. It was only in your dreams that he still… existed. It was the only time you were truly happy.

But by going to that funeral, it meant coming to face with the reality that everything was indeed real. That Kim Seokjin was truly dead.

“I know you do y/n…” he frowns, “but you have to say goodbye,” he repeats his words from earlier.

Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye.

Didn’t he understand? You didn’t want to say goodbye! You weren’t ready, and you weren’t sure if you were ever going to be.

“I don’t want to,” your voice cracks, face feeling moist because of how much you’d been crying.

“I-I know y/n but—” he’s unsure of what to say. What the hell could he say? You were mourning, you were heartbroken. The man you loved more than the world itself was dead, and there was nothing that could be done about it.

“I have to say goodbye,” you quietly mumble into space, the phrase echoing inside your mind, “I have to say goodbye,” you repeat for a final time, an empty look in your eyes.

The rain pours as you watch the casket get lowered, almost as if grieving itself.

There’s a haunting emptiness in the atmosphere, everyone still in too much shock and disbelief to believe that this was all real.

All you could do was blankly stare at what was in front of you, trying your best to tune out Mrs. Kim’s raw sobs, the sound being too much to bear.

She had lost her very first born. The child she learned how to nurture, the child whose job was for her to protect, the child who was one of her greatest joys in this world, but most importantly the child she had no doubt loved unconditionally. And so to hear her cry with such a deep hysteria…. it was just too much….

Your mom squeezes your hand tightly, knowing that no words could take away the pain that you were feeling. She had first hand witnessed the love Kim Seokjin had for you, watching it go from a faint crush when you two were teenagers to a love so strong she was once sure it was unbreakable. You were going to get through this dark period in your life, that she was sure of, but the real question was when exactly would you come to accept it.

The clergy makes the final cross motion, ending his eulogy with God knows what because right now everything was just a big blur for you. Because even now with the sight of his casket being lowered six feet under and seeing both his mother and siblings cry like never before, it just didn’t feel real.

Slowly members of his family begin to leave after bidding their final goodbyes, with the occasional number of them stopping to give you their condolences, only making your heart wrench even more. You weren’t his wife, so why were they treating you like some widow? You didn’t deserve their consolation because you didn’t choose him. Like the horrible person you were, you just watched him leave that night. If it weren’t for you—

“Y/N?” a familiar voice interrupts your thoughts.

Turning, you feel your body go cold, “Y-Yoongi?” and beside him were none other than Namjoon and Taehyung, all three of them having tear stained eyes.

With sad eyes, they give you a small smile, clearly hurting themselves at the loss of their dear friend.

Soon you’re embraced in a hug by them, your body still in disbelief at the sight of them. It had been so long since you’d last seen them, years in fact. Never did you imagine your reunion with them would be here.

“W-we would’ve gotten here sooner but we caught traffic,” Taehyung says with a weak voice, eyes on the verge of spilling more tears.

And for the first time in a month, a small smile appears on your face, “You’re—” you sniffle, “You’re such a bad liar,” and he pulls you in for another hug, this time allowing those tears to fall.

The four of you soon stand in silence, words not having to be exchanged in order to understand what you were all feeling.

Namjoon suddenly speaks, “The last time I saw him was was the day he first came back into town, Christmas,” Yoongi smiles at the memory, all three of them being there, “He stopped by our apartment before going back to his mom’s, said he wanted to say hi,” Joon continues, “even apologized for just disappearing out of nowhere.”

“Tch that idiot,” Yoongi mumbles, “he said the first place he wanted to go was the diner but that they were closed,” Yoongi’s eyes glisten, trying his best not to cry.

“He then promised that for the next time he saw us, he’d to treat us to a meal and some soju,” Taehyung feigns a laugh, “We never got to take him up on it though...” his eyes lower.

“But the thing I’ll remember the most was his horrible attempt at finding out how you were after all those years,” Namjoon shakes his head, a dimpled smile appearing on his face.

Yoongi’s face lights up, remembering just how much he teased Jin that night, “You should’ve seen him,” he chuckles, “Not only were his ears red like how they’d always get but his whole face as well,” tears fall from Yoongi’s face as he laughs, “He looked like a tomato.”

“Ah and the mullet,” Taehyung reminds them, and soon the clear image of the Jin you’d fallen in love with when you were seventeen appears in your mind.

And for the first time since their appearance, you speak, “He—” you softly chuckle, “He was always convinced he’d bring them back in style,” and the boys feel a sudden sense of happiness in seeing you talk about him.

“Yeah he was—” Namjoon suddenly stops speaking, the boys and him now staring at something behind you.

It was Mrs. Kim, who was now walking towards the four of you, a box in her hands. A solemn smile graces her face.

One by one, she hugs each one of them, turning her attention towards you last, “I was—” she pauses, “I was hoping I could talk to you, privately,” she says, the boys silently nodding and bidding a silent farewell to you, glad to have made you smile, even if it was for a temporary moment.

She leads you to a bench, not too far away from his grave.

By now the rain had stopped and the sky was now a gloomy shade of gray.

Placing the box on her lap, for a small moment both of you simply stare at the view in front of you in silence.

You hadn’t talked to her since the night of your rehearsal dinner, not because you didn’t want to, but because looking at her reminded you so much of him. It reminded you of that first day you met him, how she had forced him to show you around town, not knowing that the two of you would be head over heels for one another years down the road. She, along with your mom, had always been your guys’ number one fan, always rooting for the both of you.

“He really did love you,” she stares off into the distance, “up until his very last breath, I’m sure,” she whispers.

You lower your gaze, unable to look at her.

Oddly enough, there was a peaceful aura in the air, both quiet and serene. Just like he would’ve loved it to be. He never did like seeing people cry.

“Whenever he’d come back home to visit, you should’ve seen the way his eyes would light up when he’d talk about you,” she smiles, “always eager to talk about what you were doing with your career,” she fiddles with her wedding ring, “Sungjin would get peeved but Seokjin wouldn’t care,” she chuckles, “he just loved you that much.”

At the mention of his father, only then fo you realize that you hadn’t seen him at all the entire service, “Where’s—” you’re hesitant to ask, not wanting to push boundaries, “Where’s Mr. Kim?” you croak. Yeah, he and Jin didn’t have the best relationship, but did that really matter now? Did any of it matter at this point?

She bitterly smiles, “He’s grieving in his own way,” she says, her voice breaking and her eyes still watery, “Those two had a tough love relationship,” she feigns a laugh, “but—” her voice cracks, “I always secretly knew that Seokjin was Sungjin’s favorite,” she sniffles her tears, “he just wasn’t good at showing it.”

You try your best not to cry, too physically and emotionally exhausted to sob any more. To you, it was just better to be numb than to feel every single emotion heightened, but God was it so hard. Everything just had to be so fucking hard.

Tightly, you grip the bench with your fingers, biting your lip in effort to suppress your emotions.

Slowly, she begins to open the box, pulling out what seemed to be childhood photos of Jin.

A genuine smile appears on her face as she begins to show you them, wet tears splashing onto the squared photos, “I—” she stutters, “I wanted you to have these,” she begins to explain, handing some of the photos off to you, “I tried looking for the photos and videos he’d take when you two met but,” she frowns, “but I don’t if he threw them away or—” she begins to ramble, “so I brought you these instead. I’m sorry they’re not of the exact memory you have of him,” she feigns a chuckle, “you know Seokjin,” she scratches the back of her neck, reminding you of exactly where Jin got his mannerisms from, “he never did like taking pictures.”

She flips through more of the photos, “I’m sorry there’s not that many,” her voice shakes, “I just—”

She needed to keep her memories of him too, is what you know she wants to say.

You notice that she’s also thrown some of Jin’s favorite things in the box, his denim jacket, the original little Mario figure he had always kept on his bed stand and his favorite Mariah Carey album, Daydream.

“I understand Mrs. Kim,” you softly say, “Thank you,” you whisper to her, embracing her in a tight hug.

“I should be the one thanking you,” she says in return. Thank you for loving him, are the unspoken words that linger in the air.

“I should—” you lower your gaze, “I should get going,” you say, feeling as if the world was spinning, your breathing now becoming rapid.

With the cardboard box in your hands, she watches as you hurriedly leave, only hoping that rather than haunt you, things could one day get better for you.

Running as far as you could, you hide behind a pillar.

It was all too much.

Everything was just too much.

Finally, silent sobs escape your mouth as you squat against the cement pillar. Grabbing his jacket from the box, you sob into it.

You just couldn’t let go.

As much as you wanted this all to be some horrible nightmare, you knew deep down it wasn’t. This mind numbing pain was all too real and unbearable for it to be some dream. You weren’t going to be waking up and finding Jin by your bedside, you weren’t going to hear his high pitched laugh ever again, and you weren’t ever going to be able to tell him just how much you still loved him.

Because Kim Seokjin was never coming back.

Your Jin was never coming back.

And it was completely all your fault for it. It was all your stupid miserable fault. If only you had—

“Y/N?” Seojun crouches down to face you, genuine concern on his face. “You’re—” he stutters, “You’re gonna get sick standing out here,” he wipes your snotty nose with his suit’s handkerchief.

Seojun was trying. He was trying to be as supportive as he could, and you understood that, truly you did. But just looking at him was a reminder of your choice because at the end of the day he was the person you chose over—

“It’s going to get dark soon y/n,” he whispers, “I-I think we should get going.”

You stare at him in silence and then turn to face the direction of the grave.

He wanted you to say goodbye.

But you just … you just weren’t ready to.

Because there lied the boy you were once so certain you’d have a future with. The boy who was capable of making you laugh even on gloomy days like this. The one who loved you on your good and bad days. The one who stood in a room full of people just to tell you how much he still loved you, something you knew he was probably so nervous about.

And so you just couldn’t let go.

But knowing you’d couldn’t stay here forever, you had to do the most humane thing you could possibly do. You had to live on.

“And so I did, all for him…”

“Yeojin!” you grab your mischievous 4 year old from the waist, stopping her blatant attempt at touching the stove, “What did I say about trying to touch the stove,” you scold her, and all she does is giggle, clearly unaware of the potential consequences of her actions.

Sadly you couldn’t be too mad, she was still learning right from wrong, but when it came to things like this, it was hard to keep your patience.

Carrying her up the stairs, you continue to scold her, “Remember what I said about it being hot,” you remind her, “you don’t want to end up with your fingers all red, do you?”

She nods her head no, “Of course not mommy.”

“Then,” you sigh, placing your little girl on her bed.

“Daddy said I’m in-de-struct-ible,” she sounds out the new word she’s recently learned, “Like Spiderman!” she mimics the superhero’s web shooting ability, the movie she just saw recently still clearly still in her mind.

“Okay Spiderman, I think it’s time you take a nap,” you say, and she mumbles something inaudible in return, “Hey hey, don’t go giving attitude now little lady,” you hide your smile, “it’s too early for all of that.”

Though not wanting to sleep, she allows you to tuck her in, already planning to get up and play with her toys once you left.

Taking note of her grumpy attitude, you place a kiss on her forehead, gently combing a hand through her hair, “I love you,” you coo.

“I love you too Mommy,” and before you knew it, her eyes were closed, the little girl now “sound asleep”, or at least that’s what you thought.

Sighing, you leave the room, gently closing the door.

That girl was a handful, most definitely, but she was everything you had in this world. Your symbol to keep moving forward, despite that constant need to look back.

Going down the stairs, you hum Mariah Carey’s new song, “We Belong Together” , the famous singer’s latest comeback single having topped the charts these days.

“When you left I lost a—” the smell of something burning gathers your attention, the intense scent of cooking oil alarming you that something was wrong. Your mind goes back to when you grabbed Yeojin from reaching the stove, her arm clearly outstretched—

Boom!

The kitchen illuminates an intense shade of red, a fire now starting from the stove, “Oh my—” immediately you run up the stairs because despite your mind being in utter chaos, one thing was clear: you had to get Yeojin out of here.

Frantically turning the knob to her door, you come to realize that it’s locked, “Yejin!” you yell.

“Mommy, I’m playing!” she giggles, oblivious to the danger you both were in.

You practically begin to punch the door, “Yejin I need you to open the door!” your breathing becomes heavy, panic now flowing in your veins. Smoke was beginning to reach upstairs, signaling to you that this fire was moving fast, dangerously fast.

Taking a deep breath, you take a couple of steps back from her door, “1..2…” using all your force, you ram into the door, effectively opening it in the process.

Without a second thought you grab Yeojin, wrapping one of her blankets around her body and face, immediately running down the stairs as fast as you possibly could.

By now the whole entire living room and kitchen were in flames, and you could hear Yeojin begin to whimper, confused as to what was going on.

“Everything’s gonna be okay baby,” you soothe her, your hand regrettably grabbing the door knob.

Immediately you hiss in pain, retracting your hand, “Oh God,” your hand felt as if it was sizzling.

There was no way you could get to the window, not without risking your daughter’s safety.

Preparing yourself for what you were about to do, you mentally reassure yourself, completely grabbing the door handle and twisting it, withholding the screams you desperately wanted to let out until you were out.

Running out, you place your daughter on the neighbor's front yard, the family immediately coming to assist you.

By now the whole neighborhood was standing outside their houses, concern and worry evident on their faces, “Oh my God y/n,” your neighbor notices the burn on your hand, “Go grab the kit in the basement!” she instructs her son.

By now, your breathing was erratic, a result of all the smoke you had inhaled, “T-The f-fire de—”

“We’ve already called them, they should be on their way. I’ve called Seojun’s job as well—” she immediately reassures you, “You need to relax y/n,” she tells you, but immediately your mind goes to something inside your house that was irreplaceable.

Mrs. Kim’s box.

Getting up from the lawn, you hear Yeojin call out to you, “Mommy!” she yells as you begin to run back to the house, focused on one thing and one thing only.

Getting that box.

“Y/N!” your neighbor tries to get you to come back, but by then you were already making your way inside, using your shirt as a cover for both your mouth and nose, a measly attempt at having more time inside the house.

Running up stairs, you barge into your room, immediately looking to the spot in your closet where you always had the box, but to your shocking surprise… it wasn’t there.

“What the…” you mumble to yourself, your lungs beginning to feel heavy again.

Without a second thought, you begin to ravage the room, knowing your time in here was limited. The fire was going to reach up the stairs at any moment, and once it did, it was over for you.

“What the fuck!” you yell to the empty room, feeling as if you were on the verge of an utter mental breakdown. It had to be here! There was no way you moved it, and Seojun knew better than to touch it. Putting a halt to your search, your eyes widen when you come to realize something.

What the hell was Yeojin playing with?

The Mario figure.

And in the blink of an eye, you run out the room, only to find the hallway now engulfed in flames, making it almost impossible to get into her room, not unless you wanted to burn to death.

“No…” you say under your breath, refusing to believe the box was in there. Your vision was beginning to get hazy and your head was pounding, now unsure if it was because of the fire or if it was because of the state of shock you were in. Tears begin to fall from your eyes as you hear the sound of the firetrucks nearing the house.

“Seokjin…” your voice breaks, realizing that the final things you had to remember him by were now gone. But despite your state of grief, your body knew it had to move on its own. Because by staying here, you’d inevitably die, and he wouldn't want that, not because of something like this.

Lifting up the window in your bedroom, you begin to slowly place your body out, trying your best to work with one hand. The fire was beginning to get to your bedroom, and you simply couldn’t afford to wait for the firemen to come with a ladder.

Sucking the pain up for one final time, you place your injured hand onto the ledge as well, now dangling outside the window, a scream of pain coming out of your mouth.

“Oh my God, Y/N!” you hear Seojun call out to you, “I’m gonna get you help, just hang on!” he yells, immediately running back to the front yard to presumably tell a fireman.

But the pain on your hand was just too much.

You needed to let go.

Even if it meant getting hurt in the process.

And soon you feel the impact of the floor, your arm taking mosting of the hit, most definitely dislocating. The last thing you see being the paramedics.

“Mommy! Mommy! Look what I made for you with all the other kids who were visiting their mommies and daddies!” Yeojin eagerly shows you the scribbling piece of art she created from her car seat, a toothy grin on her face.

“It looks amazing Yeojin,” you feign a smile, trying your best to act normal. Today you had been discharged from the hospital after about 2 weeks of getting your hand and arm treated along with having multiple tests ran because of the amount of smoke you inhaled.

Now, with bandages wrapped around your hand and a heavy cast, which the doctor said would take about two to three months to completely heal, you were on your way to your new (temporary) home. The fire had ravaged absolutely everything, sparing not a single thing in its sight.

It was your fault really, you shouldn't have had the cooking oil so close to the stove, especially without its cap on.

You turned your attention to Seojun, his quietness during the whole car ride not going unnoticed by you. It seemed as if whenever he did talk or laugh, it was unmistakingly fake.

Deciding you weren’t going to press him on it in front of Yeojin, you tell Yeojin to go upstairs to her room once you arrive.

Sighing, you place your things on the dining table, your free arm now feeling sore from its now constant use.

You attempt to make small conversation with your husband, “The insurance company called me at the hospital, said almost everything was covered…” you bring up, but he remains stoic.

You try again, “Yeojin seems to have made a lot of friends, with the way she was rambl—”

He finally breaks his silence by interrupting you, “Why did you do it...” he mumbles, causing your eyebrows to perk up, “Why did you run back into that fire?” he asks, trying to contain his anger.

You feel your body freeze for a moment before answering, “I told you already, I wanted to get the papers in the sa—”

He’s quick to cut you off, venom in his voice, “Stop lying,” he grits his teeth, “There was—” he shakes his head, “There was only one thing in that house that I’m sure you’d risk your life for Y/N, so let’s stop acting dense here…”

You lower your gaze, silence filling the room.

“You could’ve died y/n,” he whispers, and your silence only peeves him, “Died!” he repeats, wanting you to understand the possible severity of your actions.

Narrowing your gaze, you scoff, “You think I don’t know that,” you spit back, not exactly fond of how he was treating you, as if you weren’t a grown woman capable of understanding the consequences of your actions.

“No I don’t think you do,” he retorts back, “Because if you did then you wouldn’t have ever gone back inside that house to begin with!” his voice becomes louder.

“You’re going to wake her up,” you refer to Yeojin, who was probably taking a nap in her room.

It was now his turn to scoff, “Like you care.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” you growl in return.

“You almost left her without a mother!” he finally yells, “All for that goddamn—” he stops himself midway, unable to finish the sentence.

You glare at him, knowing exactly what he wanted to say, your eyes already getting watery at the thought of it, “Say it,” you challenge him, “Say what you’ve been wanting to say for all these years,” you mutter.

“He’s gone y/n…” he tiredly whispers under his breath, maintaining your gaze, “He’s been gone for 4 years now!” he cries out, and you feel your face twist in anguish.

“Shut up,” you mutter.

“It’s time to accept it y/n, you can’t keep letting him haunting you, you can’t keep being in deni—”

“Just shut up!” you yell but he relents.

“Life has moved on y/n,” his voice breaks, “it’s time that you do too!”

“But I have! Can’t you see?” tears are uncontrollably falling down your face by now, “I stayed with you despite it all!” you scream, now heaving in anger, “I had a kid with you, we bought that big old house you always wanted—”

“And why is that y/n? Why did you stay with me after his death, huh? Why?” he asks you, his questions ringing in your head, making you feel as if you were going insane.

“Because I made a choice that day!” you yell loud enough for your voice to echo across the room, everything coming to a haunting silence, “Because I chose you that night, when I could’ve chosen him,” you cry, “And I can’t bring myself to regret that choice, not anymore at least, because regretting you would mean regretting her!” you glance at the stairs, signalling that you were talking about Yejin, “And I just can’t bring myself to do that. I chose you, and I have to deal with that decision for the rest of my life. I got up from that bed years ago and went on with my life all for you—”

He shakes his head, “No you didn’t…” he frowns, “You didn’t…”

You did it for him.

“Y/N he’s dead…” Seojun repeats, his heart still wrenching for you even years later, “it’s time you let go and begin to live for yourself. Not for him, not for me, not for her, but for you,” he grabs your hand, squeezing it in the process, “It’s time you let go.”

You pull your hand back, refusing to accept it, “I just—” you muster up your tears, “I just wanted to save what was left of him. Because without it he just existed in my memory and—” your voice shakes, “and now he really only does. Because now he’s really gone,” you sob,“ Can-Can you really blame me?” you weakly say.

“I can’t,” he says, “but I also can’t keep doing this anymore,” he murmurs, “I’ve tried y/n, I really have. But I can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped, and I have to prioritize Yeojin first and so I think—” he struggles to continue, “I think we should get a—”

“Divorce,” you scoff, tears still flowing down your face.

He gulps, “I’ve been talking with a lawyer for about a year now, we’d get joint custody, with no need for court because I don’t see us having to make this a longer process than it needs to be.”

“You’re not taking my daughter away from me,” you clench your teeth.

“I know I’m not and I wasn’t planning on it because damn it y/n, you’re an amazing mother. Truly, you are. But—” he pauses, “But until you find closure and acceptance then I think—I think she should stay with me for the meanwhile, until you’re ready that is.”

Until you’re ready to let go.

By now you were fully sobbing again because not only were you unable to control your emotions, but because you knew he was right. Ever since Seokjin’s death, he was the one who had to hear you silently cry at night, the one who had to accept that no matter what Seokjin would always be the one dearest to you, and who secretly hoped that with time it’d be something you’d get past.

Had it been anyone else, and you were sure they would’ve left you the day Seokjin passed. But Seojun was different, Seojun understood. But he couldn’t prioritize you anymore, not with Yeojin now in the picture.

You feel his arms wrap themselves around your frame, comforting you for a final time, “I’m sorry, for everything,” he whispers.

“Me too Seojun,” you hum in return, “Me too.”

The smell of the fresh rain hitting the concrete headstones fills your nose as you make your way to the resting place of the person you once loved the most. You hadn’t been here since the funeral, too in denial to ever really visit.

It had been three months since your separation with Seojun, your arm now fully healed. Currently, you were staying at a small apartment near your parent’s house, still unable to bring yourself to stay at their place. Not with the amount of memories it brought on.

The last you’d heard, Mrs. Kim had also moved, and you assumed it was for the same reason you couldn’t bring yourself to go back home. It was just too much.

Placing the red roses on top of the headstone, you make yourself comfortable by sitting on the grass, not caring if it was moist from the rain.

You just wanted to talk to him.

“I’m getting divorced, you know?” you begin, deciding to catch him up on recent events, “Things didn’t seem to work out between me and Seojun,” you chuckle, staring at your now naked ring finger ,“Not that you hadn’t predicted it already.”

Silence.

“We had a daughter together,” you mention the hyper little girl, “Her name is Yeojin, I think you would’ve loved the name,” you say, “She—”already you feel tears beginning to well up in your eyes, “She sorta laughs like you, that same kind of laugh that unintentionally makes everyone around her laugh,” you begin to ramble, “she seems to like Mariah Carey as much as you too, she’s the only artist we’ve noticed that can get Yeojin up and dancing. I’m sure she would’ve loved to dance with you,” tears begin to fall from your eyes.

The soft sprinkles of the rain surprisingly soothe you.

“God, I’m such a crybaby,” you mumble, remembering how Jin would tease you for your sensitivity to things, “It’s just so hard, you know? Sometimes it still feels like you’ll walk through the door with a VHS movie you just rented in your hand, talking about how excited you are to see it after hearing reviews,” you laugh, “or that you’ll come in the room to tell me to fix your hair after cutting it crookedly.”

You place your hand on his headstone, softly grazing your palm against its rough surface, “You know scientist theorize that there’s possibly billions to an infinite number of parallel universes out there,” you chuckle, “I learned about it in my introductory course to Physics my first year in college, I don’t know if you remember me babbling about it,” you continue, “But it means that there are cosmic patches which are exactly like ours where everything has happened exactly like this one, meaning somewhere out there there’s someone exactly like us, except they have the possibility to do things different. And so... I wonder in which universe did we get our happy ending?” you solemnly ask, “I—”

“Y-Y/N?” a familiar voice says your name from behind, and immediately you turn to face the person.

“Mr-Mr.Kim?” you say in disbelief, as you hadn’t seen the man in years. Not since the final year you were still with Jin.

You scan his appearance, wrinkles and gray hairs now more prevalent on him, but yet he still looked like the spitting image of his son. He just looked more … tired.

He places the flowers in his hands next to yours, silently taking a seat next to you. You were still staring at him in shock as he was the last person you would’ve expected to see today.

“It’s—It’s been a while,” he says, and originally you were unsure if he was saying it to you or his son, that was until he turned his attention towards you.

Silently, you nod, unsure of what to say, “Yeah,” you mumble.

“Do you often come here?” he asks.

Ashamed, you nod your head no, “This is actually my first time since the funeral,” you confess.

He hums a response, not in a place to judge, “Nothing to be ashamed about little girl, we all have our own ways of grieving and coping with a loss,” and you’re surprised to hear such comforting words from him. In the years you’d known him, you couldn’t recall a time where you had an actual genuine conversation with him. It was depressing that it had to be now.

“Do—” you hesitate, “Do you?” you gulp, “Do you often come here?” you repeat his question.

Coughing first, he then responds, “Every Friday since his funeral,” his fingers tremble, and you were unsure if was because of his age or because of the topic he was currently talking about, “I do it to catch up with my boy, keep him up to date with the things you young people are doing,” he explains, eyes now glistening, “it’s the least I could do for him,” he mumbles.

A silence follows after.

Feeling bold, you ask him something you’d been curious about for a long time, “Why didn’t you come to the funeral?”

He stares at the headstone, “I—” he sighs, “He was my first born, my first son, my—” he hardens his jaw to prevent himself from crying, “The night it happened he called the house, asking me to go pick him up. I had been tired from work that night, so I went to sleep early,” you feel your heart twist, “If I hadn’t overworked myself that day, I could have picked up that phone call and told him to stay where he was, that I’d be there in no time because at the end of the day he was my son who I loved like no other, even if we had a rocky relationship. He still called his dad for help, and I—” he takes a deep breath in, feeling himself lose control, “I let him down,” he ultimately says, “And so I let the guilt eat me alive, to the point where I felt like I didn’t deserve to go to my son’s funeral.”

You stare at him in silence, understanding exactly what he felt. For you had felt that same guilt all these years.

“I quit my job following his death, and fell into a deep depression like no other. Yerin and I were even close to getting a divorce, the loss of our son adding a strain to our marriage,” he explains, “She had managed to accept and let go of her pain, but for me it was just too much. I couldn’t accept that he was gone,” he pauses, “I just couldn’t let go.”

A single tear falls from his eye.

“I was breathing , but no longer was I living,” he continues, “And so I needed to learn how to live for myself. I needed to accept that he was gone. I needed to say goodbye, even if it hurt to do so,” he smiles solemnly to himself, “because once I finally did, it was liberating.”

“And it was in that moment while talking with Mr. Kim that I’d come to realize that in order to start living for myself, that it was time to let go, that it was time to say goodbye.”

Getting up from the grass, you stare at Seokjin’s grave for one final time, for it was time to accept the cruel fate that had been given in this awful tale. One day you’d be back, that you were sure, but for now all that was left for you to say was....

“Goodbye Seokjin,” you whisper, ready to begin again.

Jimin and Jia stare at you in silence, both having dried tears and disbelief written on their faces. This couldn’t be how the story ended, right?

But it was.

“So you really have nothing to remember him by?” Jia asks, and you point to your forehead.

“Sadly all ll I have is this,” you say, “but for me that’s more than enough.”

You turn your attention towards Jimin, “And so here I am, having told you this story in order to teach you that you shouldn’t let your fears get in the way of allowing yourself to be happy, ” you say, “Because then you’ll live a life of nothing but regret,” and immediately he gets up from his seat.

“Where the hell are you—” Jia’s about to ask him something until you raise a finger, signaling to her to let him be.

“I’m-” he stutters, “I’m going to get my girlfriend back,” he breathes out, squeezing past Jia, “T-Thank you Ms. y/l/n. I mean it,” he says, and you only smile in return.

“I should be the one thanking you,” you whisper to yourself, watching as he hurriedly leaves the diner.

Placing money on the table, Jia smiles at you, “Come on Grandma, let’s go home,” she hugs you once you get up, making a new vow to herself to appreciate those around her and never take anything for granted. Just like Jimin had learned, she had to live for herself.

“Finally! I know I told you that you could stay out as long as you wanted but I didn’t think—” Yeojin is interrupted by the embrace of her daughter arm’s. Confused by the sudden act of affection, she narrows her eyes, “If this is some trick into getting your phone little—”

“Shhh,” Jia complains, “I can’t hug my mom?”

Allowing her skepticism to pass, Yeojin returns the hug, “Movie night?” she asks her daughter and immediately she nods.

You smile at the sight, making your way up the stairs and into your room.

Slowly, you crouch under the bed, pulling out a worn out box from under your bed, grabbing a small flash drive out of it in the process. Placing the now vintage item into the plug-in of your TV, your mind flashes back to that last conversation you had with Mr. Kim.

“Wait,” Mr. Kim stops you from leaving, pulling something out of his suit’s breast pocket, in what seemed to be a flash drive?

Handing you the small item, you look at him confused, “I found it in his room when we moved, not too long after his passing, I’m guessing he must’ve converted it before breaking that old camera of his and well I always carried it around just in case—” he pauses, “Just in case I ever bumped into you.”

You furrow your brows, why was he telling you this now? Why didn’t he look for you instead?

As if reading your mind he says, “Because you’ve finally said your goodbye,” he smiles, “watch this when you’re finally allowed to look back. "

Pressing play, you stare at the screen in front of you.

“Seokjin!” the person behind the camera sighs, “Seokjin!” Mrs. Kim yells again, and the camera begins to shake, presumably because the person was now going down the stairs.

The camera soon pans to the twins, both of them giggling at the cameraman's antics, “Say hiiii,” he cooes. And soon the door he’s recording opens and the camera pans to a 17 year old you, an awkward expression being worn on your face.

“Woah,” he whispers, zooming in on your face.

Your eyes begin to water as you watch the recorded memory.

“Seokjin, but you can call me Jin for short,” he introduces himself, the camera now recording the wall beside him, probably because of how he was carrying it in that moment.

The scene then changes.

“Come on, you know you wanna smileeee,” Jin sings, he closes the camera to your face, ultimately making you smile.

“Well cheers to a new friendship,” Taehyung announces and Jin records you all lifting your hands in the air.

The scene changes again.

“This is her first time eating kongguksu everyone,” Jin announces.

“Who are you even talking to?” you roll your eyes, grabbing the noodles with your chopsticks.

“To the people of the future!”

And you recall how Jin had winked at you that time, causing your crush on him to begin to grow more intense.

Your face gets red as he continues to record you. Taking a slurp of the noodles, you try to cover your face.

“Well what do you think?” he asks.

Your face twists, “Mmmm I don’t know,” you mumble, the taste not exactly being your favorite.

“Boooo!”

You flash him the middle finger.

The scene changes.

“Y/N” the camera begins to move around, and your giggles begin to get louder, “Hand that back to me!” the camera begins to move in an up and down motion, probably because whoever was holding it was running.

Soon the person gets tackled, but not before panning the camera onto Seokjin’s face.

“And the recorder finally gets recorded,” you laugh, and Jin attempts to cover his face, but you’re quick to remove his hands. He awkwardly avoids eye contact, allowing you to record his face.

You feel your breath hitch. It was Jin… the Jin you knew, the Jin you fell in love with. Right there in front of you.

Looking at the camera he quickly makes a kissy face, making you shriek in excitement. “There you have it folks,” you tease him, “Kim Seokjin being the model he is…”

He rolls his eyes, now attempting to reach for the camera.

“Okay okay, that’s enough,” he groans as you relent.

“Smileeee!”

The scene changes for a final time, and you see Jin sitting in his room, facing the camera you presumed he had set up.

“Hello!” he awkwardly waves to the camera, “If you’re watching this it means one, you’ve been snooping around in this room or two, you’re Y/N.”

You feel your heart skip a beat, and your body going numb.

“Ah I don’t know how to start this,” he chuckles, scratching the back of his neck, “When I first met you, I thought you were really pretty,” he begins, “and I knew I wanted to be your friend! What I didn’t think was going to happen was that I’d end up really really realllyyyy liking you,” he laughs, “I’ve been trying to tell you for some time now,” his voice cracks, and immediately he begins to cough, trying to make himself sound as manly as possible, “So I thought why not tell you the best way I knew how … through film! That way I’ll let this video do all the work for me,” he smiles.

You laugh at how endearing he was.

“Hopefully you like me too because if not then I feel really bad for the future Jin who’s probably attentively watching your reaction and crossing his fingers. I made this collage of memories using the shitty editing programs we have at the school library so sorry if it’s not exactly the best, but …. I hope this is something you can look back on in the future and be glad I recorded, even if you complained all the time.”

Look at him, predicting the future.

“So… I’ll leave it to the future Jin to handle the rest,” he laughs, “Byeeee!” he waves to the camera. His final goodbye.

5 years later.

“Mom, slow down!” Yeojin instructs, worried about how fast you were trying to walk.

“If you can’t keep up with me, an 80 year old lady, then that should be a concern for you, not for me!” you continue with your daily walk, enjoying the spring weather.

“If you’re not careful you cou—” Yeojin suddenly stops speaking, now having caught up to you. “Mom?” Yeojin asks, concerned as to what you two were staring at with such a shocked expression on your face. Following your gaze, she notices a man staring at you a little girl tugging at his shirt.

“Daddy! I wanna play on the swings!” she pouts at the lack of attention her father was giving her. Immediately you recognize the woman sitting on the bench behind them, remembering her once crying face which was now replaced with a grin as she carried a second (younger) child in her arms.

Slowly the man raises his hand, waving at you with a warm smile on his face.

A single tear falls from your eye as you wave back, your heart swelling at the sight.

And as quick as the moment was, it ended just as fast. As slowly, you began to walk away, while he went on to play with this young daughter. Two strangers crossing paths for a final time.

“Do you know that man?” Yeojin cluelessly asks, confused about the exchange that just happened in front of her.

You nod your head, a smile still on your face, “No,” you chuckle, “No I don’t,” you ultimately say, continuing with your walk.

a/n: whew ! & that’s the end ! if you’ve made it this far then i want to personally thank you! i don’t really expect this story to get many notes well because it’s sad and well ik i personally don’t normally click on major character death fics haha. if you enjoyed this fic then (if you can) please please please leave a comment/review/like/reblog (whichever works best for you) and you can always hop in my ask box for any questions or comments :) im thinking of making an alternative ending for this one day, maybe after i finish the whole tun series, but we’ll see haha. ill see yall next time ! <3

73 notes · View notes