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alienzil · 7 months

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Okay so I saw this post and you know the types of fics where adult Danny moves to Gotham and winds up emotionally adopting one or more of bat kids or accidentally coparenting with Bruce (with or without a relationship between them)? I had the thought, what if Danny parented the bat kids but he started doing it out of spite?

Like, Danny moves to Gotham and runs into Batman and Robin one night while out for a late night flight and drops down to the rooftop to say hi.

Bruce sees this 5'6" twink that looks like a stiff breeze could knock him over and is so obviously new in town and thinks Gotham is going to eat him alive, he needs to leave before he gets killed.

Batman: Looming menacingly and in his deepest scariest Batman voice, "Leave. Metas aren't allowed in Gotham."

Danny: Offend! Excuse?! Who does this guy think he is?! 😡 Danny was trying to be polite here! "First of all, I'm not a meta. Second of all, rude much?!"

Batman: Does scariest bat glare. "Leave." Swoops off into the night.

Robin (Damian): "My father is correct. You should leave the city for your own safety."

Danny sees this tiny vigilante child with fierce expression and a sword and is just like awww, so cute! 😍 Then he noticed Robin had a small cut on his arm and his inner gremlin activates. If the rude flying furry can't take care of his own kid properly, Danny will do it better!

He bandages up Damian's arm, gives him a cookie and teaches him a neat sword trick before sending him on his way with a hug telling him he needs his sleep.

Danny goes out of his way to run into the bat kids and be the absolute best dad.

He takes Nightwing flying and throws him in the air so Nightwing can do all the fanciest acrobatic tricks.

He tracks down Red Hood and starts a book club with him (Danny may or may not have used his connection with Ghost Writer to get ahold of some rare books).

He eats waffles with Spoiler and trys out weird topping combinations that make them both make faces and laugh.

He makes new gadgets for Red Robin but carefully breaks them just a little bit and takes them to the teen so they can fix them together (it's enrichment!). He always insists RR keep them as a reward.

He follows Signal around during the day invisibly, making faces and doing tricks only Signal can see (he made him laugh in front of the police at a crime scene twice!).

All of the kids get his attention and love and Danny smugly thinks how Batman must be absolutely seething about his kids bonding with Danny and Batman missing out on all of it.

Danny started it out of spite but he does wind up genuinely loving the bat kids.

Batman definetly hates it when the kids are bonding with Danny and is extremely jealous (sulky Batman brooding in his cave about it).

Bruce's repeated attempts to intimidate Danny into leaving Gotham don't work and him telling his kids to stay away from Danny had zero effect (the terrible children don't listen to him at all).

So Bruce starts spending more time with the kids to compete against Danny. The bat kids love it and (little gremlins that they are) use the two of them against each other constantly.

Bruce:"Sorry Tim, I can't make it to your photography exhibit this weekend, there's a meeting with the Justice League."

Tim:"Oh that's fine... I'll just ask Danny to come." 😏

Bruce: Narrows his eyes and grits his teeth, "Actually, the Justice League needs to have contingencies in place to manage without my input. This would be a good time to test their capabilities. I'll skip the meeting and come to your exhibit."

With both of them competing to spend more time with the kids it leads to the two of them spending time with each other to be around the kids more.

After Damian catches a terrible flu bug, Danny spends an entire weekend at the manor babying him. This is when Bruce finds out Danny has known their secret identities for months and tries to get mad about it but Alfred puts his foot down, raises a judgmental eyebrow in Bruce's direction that puts a stop to that nonsense and sets up Danny with his own room in the family wing.

Eventually, Danny gets to the point where he spends most of his nights at the manor and he and Bruce consult each other on all major household decisions.

The whole family is at the manor one morning including Danny. Bruce has a meeting at WE and he and Danny are absently discussing their plans for the day at the breakfast table.

Bruce: " The meeting should take most of the morning and then I have paperwork this afternoon and a scheduled walk through on one of the new engineering projects. I probably won't be done by the time school let's out. Can you pick up Damian today?"

Danny: "That shouldn't be a problem. Would you mind swinging by the bookstore on the way home and getting my preorder? Jay and I just finished rereading the first book and we were wanting to start the second tonight before you all go on patrol. I'd rather not try to make it to the bookstore in school rush hour traffic"

Bruce: "Sure."

Stephanie watches Danny reach out and absently straighten Bruce's tie as they both get up to leave. Bruce grabs Danny's coffee thermos and hands it to him while they walk out the door.

Stephanie: "Sooo, bets on how long until they realize they're basically married?"

#dpxdc #dcxdp #dp x dc #dc x dp #Adult Danny #Parenting out of spite #Bat dad #Batfamily shenanigans #bat kids #There's a mug in the manor #It says Number One Dad #Bruce and Danny constantly steal it from each other #Bruce/Danny?#Maybe #they're both idiots #But they love their kids

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bluegiragi · 7 months

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new handler.

early access + nsfw on patreon

#drops some monster au korangi your way so that im not hunted for sport #these two idiots #cant promise an exact number of celebrities im willin go show them with but im sure youll get a good idea #also i know my horangi is ooc #more interesting that way #cod mw2 #konig #horangi #korangi #monster 141 au #giragi art

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beanghostprincess · 7 months

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luffy knowing a bit too much information about beetles and zoro being oddly good at math are concepts that make me extremely happy for no reason

#actually the reason is that they're often seen as idiots but they just think differently #and also they're pretty much neurodivergent #luffy infodumping about beetles and zoro is like 'uh yeah sure captain' *didn't understand shit but luffy is happy so it's fine*#zoro explaining the most complicated equation known to mankind bc of some dumb new attack and luffy's like #'why are you using letters? math is with numbers haha silly zoro'#they're so real for all of this #zolu #roronoa zoro #monkey d. luffy #one piece

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lokimobius · 5 months

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LOKI S01E02 “The Variant”

#loki laufeyson #mobius m mobius #mobius #loki #lokius #lokiedit #lokigifs #lokitvedit #mcuedit #marvelgifs #mine #THEY!!!!!#the way they're both just so excited #mobius really does love chaos #i saved each of these gifs as “idiots” with a number #i wish we got more of them just jumping into timelines together #think of all the mischief they could've gotten up to #yet again i'm telling you all that i love them and that i miss them

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ineed-to-sleep · 5 months

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I really need to remember to use speak with the dead more often in bg3 bc I keep running into reddit posts that go "oh I used speak with the dead on this important npc and got this extra bit of lore/backstory" and I just feel like smashing my computer into little pieces WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT

#I LITERALLY HAVE THE SPELL AVAILABLE TO ME AT ALL TIMES #I gave astarion the necromancy of thay and he's the party's speak w the dead guy he can cast AND recast it an infinite number of times #I just. FORGET #sleep.txt #I keep going oh wow I wish there was a way to get more information on this thing and this npc didn't tell me enough and- the spell.#cast the spell. idiot. I challenge you

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bleue-flora · 1 month

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Ok, I recently wrote an essay [here] talking about the definition and duties of civil engineering as well as the ethics because of the brain rot @swordfright gave me with calling Dream Sam’s ultimate engineering project. So, because I actually am a civil engineer I took it upon myself to design the title and summary of quantities sheets just like I do at work for roads but with Dream as the project instead. And in honor of angst day sponsored by @sixteenth-day-event, I figured I’d share it because I feel like it kinda works for the prison of the mind prompt.

“Sam’s “ultimate engineering project” he deemed too damaged like a bumpy road or crumbling building that wasn’t worthy of patching and filling in the cracks or reinforcing, that’s too eroded to be fixed and preserved. So, Sam strived to tear him down to the bedrock so he could remake, remold, and reengineer Dream according to his design for the common safety, public health and well-fair.”

{These are very similar to the actual sheets I make day to day, which I shall not share for the sake of doxing my location, but yea pretty much everything has a significance. Some of it doesn’t necessarily make sense but that was because I was more so taking inventory of what we see in lore (so you know I counted ;) lol)}

#sixteenthdayevent #AAANNNNNGGST #Ah and now you see why I’ve been digging up all the prison lore and inventories ;D…. my brain rot is too powerful #still never got wardens torment enchants though :( did for the shovel and how which I’ll now have to write torture scenes for…#so ummm stay tuned for that in Misery Loves An Idiot… Dream going to have lots of fun I’m sure >:)#c!dream #dsmp #dreblr #dream smp #dsmp dream #dsmp analysis #dsmpblr #prison arc #dsmp art #pandora’s vault has a singular purpose #pandora’s vault #c!dream fanart #flora does art apparently #ah Sam… such a good engineer… if only he realized Dream was a person not a condemned structure oof #if y’all are curious enough I might share a irl work example with different numbers and stuff but didn’t want to bore you XD #happy angst day :)… wait isn’t that everyday? lol #can we talk about how I’ve done all of these prompts as descriptions of metaphors and stuff kinda funny #civil engineering

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corvase · 2 years

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oblivious idiots in love prompts

feel free to use :)

one character trying to hold the others hand and failing miserably

so then they make a fool proof plan they think will work just to hold their love interests hand

the talk with their best friend like “should i just give up? at this point you’d have to be pretending not to know”

character b going in for a kiss and when they both accidentally bump heads character b can’t stop laughing at the insanity and character a is just confused because they genuinely didn’t know b was going in for a kiss

the stomach drop when your main character has to see their love interest w someone else or simply hear about them liking someone else

the spider-man meme where they’re all pointing at each other but it’s a conversation like “i said i didn’t like you like that because you said you didn’t like me” “but i said i didn’t like you because you were literally in love with someone else” then “i only said i was in love with them because you didn’t want me!”

one character being like “yeah im soooooo bored this weekend. when you are free. You know. i have NOTHING to do. oh what ever will i entertain myself with!!! WHOOeverrr should i entertain myself with.” and the other is just like “huh. yeah that’s pretty sad”

“i changed my schedule for you, you idiot.” “wait i don’t get it. why?”

one character going in to touch the other characters face and the other character freaking out like “WHAT????? IS THERE A BUG??? WAIT GET IT OFF”

^ but twist if they’re enemies and the other character thought they were gonna like throw a punch

your character being convinced they like everyone BUT them

“i can’t believe you didn’t know.” “YOU WANTED ME TO READ YOUR MIND??!!??!”

“marry me.” “what?” “what?”

OH OH BUT ALSO one character is asleep and the other whispers “i like you.” and they wake up like “what” and the response is, once again, “what”

“can i love you?”

“i told you i liked you!” “i thought you were joking!”

“but i don’t know how to love.” “me neither.” “okay. shall we figure it out together?”

“i like you.” “wait what? but i like you.” “HUH?????”

“i just don’t want you to hurt me. i don’t know how to do this, /name/.”

“be honest. do you know?” “know what?” “that i like you!” “you like me?” “OH MY GOD.”

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dedlit · 2 months

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Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 (finale)👆

#zosan #bartodish … ?#art #fanart #mini comic #one piece #roronoa zoro #sanji #cavendish #bartolomeo #luffy only hearing the 'dish' in cavendish #nami and usopp get bartofied #we all know luffy is bartos true number one #sanji and zoro are in another stupid competition...#I just love those idiots

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hannibal-the-bimbo-cannibal · 8 days

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The way I would [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacte-

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monsterkitties · 5 months

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#STOP THAT IMPOSTOR BASTARD #HES POSTING WITH MY NAME MY ADDRESS MY PHONE NUMBER EVERYTHING #STOP HIM!#olivia octavius #doc ock #doctor octopus #the spot #jonathan ohnn #JJJJOOOOONNNY #LISTE N TO ME JONNY #I WILL CRUSH YOUR WORLD #i can hear it so clearly in her voice #IT WAS OUR COLLIDER JONNY YOU FUCKING IDIOT YOU IDIOT I SIGN YOUR FUCKING CHECKS #but shes nice enough to at least warn him with “tell one more person”#shes so stupid

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c0ffeeb1ack · 5 months

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five should've had a cat. i know i know mr. pennycrumb blah blah blah but imagine him finding a stray in the apocalypse and digging it out from the rubble bc he thought it was a human survivor or something, and then he's like goddammit just a cat :/ but the cat starts following him around regardless of how many times he tries to shoo it off and chews on delores's shirt buttons and gets into his canned tuna and is generally super obnoxious in typical cat fashion. but then on one of those endless cold lonely nights the cat creeps up to him where he's sitting slumped against the ruins of his favorite library and he doesn't have the heart to scare it off this time, and it climbs into his lap and starts to purr.

anyway this post was sponsored by the cat person gang

#the umbrella academy #tua #five hargreeves #number five #inspired by both my cats sitting in my lap at the same time like a couple of idiots #also i only read like one issue of the comics so if i just ripped of the mr pennycrumb story i promise it was a happy accident #all i know about that dog is that he exists

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eldritcheyecryptid · 10 months

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Am I the only one who noticed Crowley’s hair went from 7.77 to 6.66 and am trying to figure out if it’s reflecting his character or if it’s unintentional???

For context—hair color 7.77 hair color 6.66