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codenamesailordarillium · 2 years

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today in dumb smutty thots that come to mind half past midnight for post-darillium basil (cw nsfw p0rn deepfakes sexting bc this is who i am & always have been as a person):

on the subject of ~cat pictures~ that he always keeps ready to go on his cheeky sonic sunglasses. he hoards & treasures every nude or even scantily-clad sexy selfie as well as every professional boudoir shot river has ever gifted him (and some he somehow managed to dig up on the space internet bc his bad girl wife did a few stints of nude modeling in her luna uni days, not for the purpose of paying tuition but just for funsies to make his bowtie self squirm).

but sometime when he’s real bored and doesn’t want to deal with missy being a brat in the vault or nardole’s nagging he eventually takes up learning how to deepfake. any saucy ladies on the internet sporting glorious golden curls & strong powerful bodies meant for digging graves get their faces carefully veiled with that of his wife’s third body. he gets surprisingly good at it, and after going blind, lamenting that he can’t actually see his work anymore, takes to emailing his lovingly edited creations to the muse herself at the library.

she’s amused to no end but takes gleeful pleasure in pointing out when the subjects don’t quite match her physicality. curls that are more along the lines of beachy waves or a figure that errs a tad too thin. river generously offers that she stage a few new selfies & boudoir shots herself, especially now that she has access to the ultimate treasure trove of stock image environments, props, and lingerie. she even playfully starts to send him mocked up ~eggplant pics~ as she calls them, of the doctor not only in his current scottish model but the prior 12 before him.

so it becomes something of a game to them, this back & forth sexy fabrication across time & space, including straightforward sexting with naughty selfies taken in the heat of the moment. he becomes even more incorrigible once his sight returns, to the point a splutteringly outraged nardole catches him in a few awkward meant-to-be-private moments that he finds himself too preoccupied with his wife.

it’s mainly an odd sense of jealousy that causes him to fluster when his first face nearly comes into contact with the most recent work-in-progress that he moves to snatch his sonic shades away. it’s stupid, gatekeeping his own past self in a way, but he’s come to think of all of these images even those of his prior selves as meant for these present eyes only.

it’s probably a bit strange that one of his -- no, her now -- manic thoughts once she catches her newly regenerated reflection is the entire new world of possibilities for dirty selfies she can send her wife, after spending an entire monologue ruminating on the more romantic aspects of her marriage. she hasn’t much time to reflect on that as she goes tumbling out the door of her own TARDIS.

#river x doctor #river x twelve #(with a lil bit of 13 at the end as a treat)#idk does this count as fic #fic adjacent #maybe #otp: when the wind stands fair #otp: you even gave me your screwdriver #me only acknowledging river being stuck in the library by making it nasty af #tell me if this is worth reposting on ao3 (i mean i'll probably do anyway but not before dragging my heels for an eternity)#this is literally like .. the first doctor/river fic i've ever finished?? that's even made it past the just thinking about it phase??#it's short smutty garbage but we go where the muse takes us #and mine said 'what if basil make river deepfake' so i rolled with it

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mangostarjam · 2 months

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leaving bite marks on kiyoomi's biceps. he wears compression sleeves up to the edge of his uniform shirt, so it should be fine, right?

not that you care, not that you're even thinking about it when he's got your ankles up by your ears and you're trying to stifle your moans in his skin. in the moment the sting barely registers, all of his focus is on the slick clench of you around him, the way your nails scrabble down his broad back as his thrusts grow erratic.

it isn't until atsumu spots the ring of teeth marks at the volleyball court later that he remembers.

"omi-omi, what's that?" comes out in a shriek that pierces his eardrums. kiyoomi doesn't even look at him, but the expression on his face is clearly ticked off.

"it's nothing."

"hold up, are those bite marks?" atsumu gets close enough to tug at the sleeves, but kiyoomi jerks his arm away. "what, were you fightin' a hellcat or somethin'?"

kiyoomi fixes him with a flat stare. "are you sure you go on dates?"

atsumu splutters. "whaddaya mean?! i go on tons a dates!"

"doubtful."

#sakusa kiyoomi x reader #sakusa x reader #x reader #kiyoomi x reader #sorry atsumu i'm sure you figure it out eventually #yes i am at work yes i am avoiding work #fuji writes fic #does this count as fic? idk it just popped into my head #i am banishing shame i am hitting post #and then i'll toss my phone away and work #at my job. that i should be working at.

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sysig · 2 days

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You're still standing off to the side. Somehow, center stage has shifted from under your feet without you realizing, and you're standing in the wings, performing to no one.

Starring Role (Patreon)

#My art #ISaT #ISaT Spoilers #Siffrin #Loop #Technically - you know how it goes #Me when I relate to Siffrin: Oh no haha that's probably not great whoops haha #Me when I relate to Loop: Oh. Oh No.#Lenti has such a deathgrip on my ISaT opinions wtf how is she so powerful I thought my fave was Sif?? But I mean well-#Lol #Does this count as vent idk lol #It was fun to write tho :) Very easy! Done all at once!#As was drawing this! Also done all at once! And black and white is still really fun to work with hehe #I got to use some pretty cool outline/lineart tricks for this one yay :D #The original draft of the fic had a different title but ''Starring Role'' is kinda?? too perfect???#To the point where I looked around and I was like #Kinda shocked that there doesn't Seem? to be another fic with the same title?#Which is.........oddly relevantly thematic to this fic actually hahaha #Not to get too exacting about it but the whole thing of Loop feeling replaceable well #It would imply that other someones could do what they do better than them #What an odd refutation. Huh. Weird #Anyway - behind the scenes fun fact!#I actually really love the song Starring Role but I didn't think of it until after writing this #And now that I sing it to myself it's actually kinda perfect what the heck #So that's something to think about as well #Anyway if you're going to listen to it pls listen to the Axiom remix it is The version in my heart <3 #The glitches and stutters are perfect.....#And the clock ticking?? Why is this song so ISaT I'm gonna think about this for a while now heck #Animatic in my head shower thought -core lol

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moccasins · 5 months

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i need to see the uty crew interact with the classic ut crew. please. starlo and alphys ranting about their favorite human films. martlet and papyrus making puzzles. ceroba and toriel and maybe asgore having ✨️therapy✨️

#undertale #undertale yellow #uty #undertale fandom #ut #ut yellow #ceroba #starlo #north star #toriel #asgore #papyrus #undyne #those guys #i want to see crossover fics please #does it count as a crossover fic if it's the same universe??#idk

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sunshinebingo · 2 months

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@gwynrielweeksofficial Day 5 - Domestic Life

Synopsis: Gwyn finds comfort in the arms of Azriel after she has a nightmare.

Word Count: 800

Read on Ao3

Deep breath in through the nose. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. Now out through the mouth. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. Deep breath in through the nose. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. Out through the mouth. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6.

The fog in her mind slowly dissipated. Gwyn heard the faint echoes of Azriel’s voice rising above the pounding of her heart.

Deep breath in. And out. Deep breath in. And out.

She registered his voice guiding her through it before she felt him close to her. She reached out a hand towards where she knew his was waiting, hesitant to touch her lest he made things worse. Azriel knew where her mind had brought her to. There was only one nightmare that could cause Gwyn to scream and beg the way she had been doing a few minutes ago. Her cries had been loud enough to travel through the walls that separated their respective bedrooms in the House of Wind.

Gwyn turned on her side and, with her eyes still closed, grabbed Azriel’s hand with both of hers. The familiar ridges of his scars and his voice reminding her to breathe slowly cleared her head until the phantom touch of rough hands on her body was completely gone.

“You are safe Gwyn,” his deep voice wrapped her and warmed her better than the thin blanket that half covered her.

Azriel brushed away the strands of hair that had escaped her bun and stuck to her sweaty forehead with his free hand before lowering it to her face to wipe away her tears.

“You are in the Night Court, in your bedroom in the House of Wind. You are safe.”

He was right. She wasn’t in that wretched kitchen nor with those monsters anymore. But it wasn’t so much the reminder of the place that she was currently in that reassured her the most. Gwyn couldn’t care less at this moment in what court or what house she was at. What meant the most to her was the person who was now with her. It was those scarred and infinitely gentle hands in hers and caressing her face. It was that voice that had pulled her out of her nightmare. It was his shadows that she knew, even with her eyes still closed, were swirling around her like a shield of darkness. It was that steady and comforting presence that had helped her then, and which was still here for her now.

“Azriel?”

He immediately moved closer at the sound of his name hesitantly coming out of her lips. It pained him to hear the remnants of fear in her voice.

“Can you hold me?” she asked even as she started gliding closer to him.

Azriel would do anything to help her and he obviously would gladly start with that. He pulled his hands away and wrapped his arms around her as he lied down and pulled her closer. Gwyn placed both of her hands on his chest, delighted for the fact that he was shirtless so that she could soak in the warmth radiating from his bare skin.

“Is there anything else I can do?”

She did not need anything else but him holding her. Nothing could make her feel better. Except maybe one thing.

“Hold me tighter,” she said, rubbing her nose on his skin and inhaling his unique scent.

Azriel tightened his arms around her and pulled her even closer.

“Tighter.”

He repeated the gesture. He didn’t stop, squeezing her tighter and tighter until the sound of her giggle pierced a hole in the heaviness that had been hovering in the air.

“Not too tight, Az. I don’t want to run out of air,” she said, her voice slightly muffled from her face being pressed against his chest.

Some of his shadows left the cocoon they had made around them to dance across her neck and shoulder. Azriel chuckled as he loosened a little of his strong hold on her.

The lingering fear from Gwyn’s nightmare vanished with the heavy sigh that she let out once Azriel figured out the perfect way to hold her.

“Just like that. Can you hold me a for moment?”

Azriel kissed the top of her head before resting his own there. “I will hold you for as long as you want me to.”

Gwyn smiled. Her nightmare might have shaken her but it did not matter. She was safe and she was not alone. Nothing could break her. And when she was in the arms of the Shadowsinger, nothing could scare her either.

#Does this count as Domestic Life??#Idk but anyway 🤷‍♀️#gwyneth berdara #gwynriel #azriel shadowsinger #gwynriel weeks 2024 #gwynriel fic

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littledreamling · 2 years

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I just had a fantastic thought

If Hob was 33 in 1389 (my personal headcanon, since I heard somewhere that Ferdinand Kingsley was 33 at the time of filming), that means he was born in 1356. His birthday in the year of 2022 is his 666th birthday. You know went HARD this year, even if he couldn’t tell his friends and colleagues exactly why

#hob gadling #random shitposts #sandman netflix #the sandman #does this count as a fic prompt?#idk #I’ll count it bc I would personally LOVE to read a fic about Hob’s 666th birthday party #his little Catholic peasant heart is going FERAL #dreamling

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maxcuntstappen · 1 month

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checo spends more time than anyone with lestappen what with cooldown rooms interviews, barging into Max’s drivers room unannounced etc etc

So he just, accepts Charles presence as The Constant in the world. And So when lestappen can’t talk right away he actually finds himself in interesting strat convos with Charles. Leading to them talking abt random stuff until Max steals charles away once again

So recently, with Charles being gone. He’s a bit confused? like max is but slightly less. Like?? who’s he supposed to talk to now?? Max? All they’re gonna do is talk about Charles!!

Well, that doesn’t sound to bad actually. So they do. And whoever the third is just has to sit there and take the convo of the two red bulls lamenting about how they miss charles and charles should be here and charles is so cool and on and on

(idk also in my mind they go out for drinks after races sometimes :) for funsies)

"Sooo..." Checo starts, before awkwardly trailing off.

Max blinks at him, once, twice.

And then Checo needs to look away because there's only so much time a man can stare at Max's nearly-too-blue eyes without finding themself stuttering and stumbling.

Checo has had to learn this the hard way.

The race has only just finished. A Red Bull 1-2. A good day at the office.

There's just one thing missing.

The wrong colour race suit hovers around them.

Maybe Checo had begun taking Charles' presence for granted.

Relied on him being around too much, too often. Being way too comfortable with the other two doing the talking and socialising and letting it wash over him, chipping in if he wanted to.

But otherwise, just chilling out.

Neither Max nor him know what to do now.

Standing around in a loose circle, shuffling their feet, waiting for the interviews to begin.

The silence is anything but comfortable.

Checo needs to do something.

Needs to say something.

Now.

"So, Max, what about Charles' last lap overtake, huh?"

The effect is instant; blue eyes lighting up, hands taking flight.

"Mate," Max begins, and then he's off, talking a mile a minute.

And it's comfortable. Familiar. Checo cannot help but smile, relaxing into it.

If either of them had paused, or perhaps even cared, to notice. They would notice the third place man grumbling as he walked off, "You have to be fucking kidding me."

#idk i just had to #lav's ficlets #idek #???#idk what to tag this!!#lestappen #of course #f1 fic #i guess #whats the name for checo max n cha #is it just lestappen + their most popular third wheel??#i just had to okay!!!#ask #sorry n thank u anon #does this count as chestappen #if yes #wow #never thought that would happen for me in this lifetime

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actual-changeling · 7 months

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He told me about white wings and halos, and I remembered your stars, all I can think about are your stars.

You told me the stars are waiting for us, they are still where you put them, carefully, reverently, and you asked me to come visit them with you.

I said yes— tell me you said no.

(I love you, I love you, loved you then, love you now.)

Yes to heaven.

No to us?

You're the one giving up, not me.

(No to heaven. Yes to you, believe me, believe me.)

It shouldn't matter now. It still matters.

I keep seeing your stars, your smile, lit up and shining brighter than your creations, we can be together among them again, angels. I don't care about white wings and halos but I care about you, and I can make them care about you; they should care about you like I do.

(I haven't seen you smile like that since.)

You can't leave.

(I never made you smile like that.)

We can make your stars last forever.

There's no we anymore.

(I'll look at your stars and pray you can sense me looking at you.

There's stardust in your eyes, on your skin, and it makes me taste the joy your stars gifted to you.

I don't want halos and white wings if it kills the night sky in your soul.)

I'll wait for you to come back.

#alex writes good omens #good omens #ineffable husbands #crowley #aziraphale #good omens season 2 #go2 #aziracrow #crowley x aziraphale #ineffable divorce #does this count as poetry idk #i was working on a fic and then i just. got hit with this and needed to get it out

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jfleamont · 2 months

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Hey for your jily muse, out of order <3

Okay this is unforgivable, I know. You sent this prompt over two months ago. TWO. This ask has been sitting in my inbox since the 18th of January, so you probably won't even remember sending this but I promise you I've been thinking about it constantly and waiting to have free time to work on it and I have this tendency to leave things unfinished so this is me working through that as well lol

Without further ado, here it is ❤️

Out of Order - 744 words

Evans is in the boys' bathroom. She's in the boys' bathroom and she's crying.

One of her hands is gripping the sink, while the other fruitlessly wipes the tears that keep escaping.

She hasn't noticed his arrival, and Sirius doesn't bother clearing his throat. “I'm sure there's a perfectly logical reason for this.”

She makes a startled noise and turns to face him, her expression a mixture of anger and sadness. It's comical, really, so Sirius laughs.

“There is,” she mutters as she wipes her nose with the sleeve of her jumper. Her voice lacks the edge she usually aims at him— and at James, too, though Sirius can't help but notice a slight difference there.

He walks towards her and hands her his monogrammed tissue - he's never used it for this purpose specifically, but it has proved to be useful during the occasional prank or after a rough full moon - which she grabs immediately. She doesn't thank him, but he doesn't expect her to.

“Ah well, that's all I needed to know. It's not like you're invading my personal space or something.”

She lifts an eyebrow and eyes him curiously, looking more like her usual self. “I'm sorry, is there a plaque or an inscription that I haven't noticed? Does House Black monogram bathrooms as well as tissues?”

“Not that I'm aware of, no. Don't give my mother ideas, though, she might actually try to do that.”

She makes an attempt at a smile, but it quickly turns into a quiet sob.

“Apparently there can only be one crying girl per bathroom, and Myrtle has claimed the one across the corridor as hers so it's out of order,” she explains as she tries to regain control of her emotions, “and I thought this one was empty since everyone is heading down to watch the match.”

“You were right... for the most part. Why aren't you going then?”

“No reason,” she replies, her voice even, but she's not looking at him.

Sirius thinks he knows why. He suspects it has to do with the good luck kiss that Cornelia Kettleburn gave James at breakfast and how quickly Lily disappeared after that.

“Cool. I'm not going either. Fancy going to the Astronomy tower for a smoke?”

She looks taken aback. “I— wait, why aren't you going?”

In truth Sirius wants to go, and James is going to kill him for this, but lately he's been claiming that he no longer has feelings for Lily, and Sirius hates being lied to, so technically this is just payback.

“James got on my nerves so I'm skipping the match in protest,” he adds with a shrug and it's the truth, because it wouldn't be fair to lie. “So, are we smoking or not? Got a fag I can borrow?”

She's not an idiot: she knows this is an olive branch of sorts. Sirius can tell she's deciding whether to believe him or not; after a moment she sighs, and Sirius knows he's won.

“Haven't you got your own? Merlin, you're cheap,” she says while producing a pack of cigarettes from her satchel and handing it to him, a smirk on her face. He's glad to see that she seems to have calmed down significantly.

“I'm trying to quit so I stopped carrying them around,” he replies and grabs one, putting it in the breast pocket of his vest.

“Looks like it's working,” she notes as she fixes her appearance in front of the mirror and readies herself to leave the room.

“Absolutely.”

“Why are you mad at Potter anyway? Thought you two were inseparable,” she asks as she walks towards the door, a step ahead of him so that he can't see her face.

“Can't tell you, it's a secret.”

She huffs. “You lot are starting to sound ridiculous with all these secrets,” she whips her head towards him, her disapproval clear on her face, though he's almost certain this is just another way of disguising her curiosity. “Is this little group of yours a cult or something?”

“It's a counterculture,” he explains as he exits the bathroom, “how else are we going to beat those bigoted dickheads? The only way to fight a cult is with another cult.”

He's just joking, but the idea doesn't sound half bad to his ears.

Apparently Lily disagrees, because she snorts. Loudly. “Not sure about that logic but you do you, I guess.”

“Thanks for the support.”

“Anytime, Black.”

#thank you again for the prompt and I'm so so so sorry about the delay lol #I LOVE THIS FRIENDSHIP #does this count as jily? idk you guys tell me #I'd hate to spam the tag with non jily stuff but there's jealous Lily so I think it counts even if there are no interactions #jily #it's almost 2 am here :)#can't be arsed to check it for typos so I'll do that tomorrow goodnight folks x #jfleamont rambles #jple #jily fic #platonic blackevans #lily evans #sirius black

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deankarolina · 9 months

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Go read if i could hold you by @sapphicscience right now!

#yellowjackets #Yellowjackets Fanart #TaiShauna #but also not but also yes but ahhhhh #yjweek2023 #Does this count as yjweek ? it's based on something from yjweek?#taissa turner #shauna shipman #idk what else to say this fic had me clawing at the walls go read it ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!#B.art #sometimes i post things

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bones-of-a-rabbit · 10 months

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"We welcome you, EMPLOYEE NAME NOT FOUND, and know you'll enjoy your new job here at the Freddy Fazbear Mega-PizzaPlex!" "Uh, I actually used to work here, but... yeah, okay, thanks, haha." It's been half a decade since you've been here, but nostalgia, or something like it, has you here again, donning the uniform once more and hopeful that this will be just what you need after the last few years. Eager to meet an old friend, you find that in your impatience you've gotten yourself into a mess you're not sure you will come out of happier. The old friend you've missed is now two strangers, but you want that friend back badly enough to choose to rekindle the relationship using the bits and pieces the two strangers seem to recall. You make new friends, here- and you tell yourself that that's fine, and you're happy now, with two friends and that sense of familiarity and comfort this place fills you with. But nothing seems to fill the void that's eating you from the inside. And while you know you just need to choose to be happier, things keep getting stranger- soon your new friends are acting even odder than before, and you're not sure how to help them. And what's with that new security guard and her weird mask, anyway?

anyway the Ruin dlc gave me so many brain worms and now i have a new fic idea yee haw *dies*