#like that…. god. i feel kind of weird being more ‘experienced’ than her in some ways like just in terms of being semi-out and knowing that I | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

msnanu · 6 months

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Libertine 05 | JJK

Libertines put value on physical pleasures, meaning those experienced through the senses.

❧ Series Masterlist ❧

⏤summary ❧ He has a reputation for being the most promiscuous man on campus, and you, well, you are basically him in women’s pants. It will be the very first time that Jungkook is faced with someone who is gonna make him question his feelings and actions.

⏤𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 ❧ f*boy jungkook x f*girl female reader

⏤𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘦 ❧ some fluff, smut, mild angst, teasing and lots of sexual tension.

⏤𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 ❧ mature language, NSFW🔞

❧ banner by: @dojakoo ❧

Jungkook was lying on the couch in his house while looking at the ceiling. It was extremely plausible to say that his Sunday was being a bore compared to his last two days of the week.

His friends weren't planning to leave the house, you weren’t there for him to distract himself, and Seulgi was ignoring his calls. It was a horrible Sunday.

Despite the inertia that Jungkook's body was in, his head felt like a deep well, running at the speed of light.

All his thoughts, or most of them, were on you. He was trying to understand what was going on in your head, and of course, he was failing miserably.

There were no explanations for your actions, he could never know what your next move would be. He couldn’t quite understand how you had sex with one of his friends and then kissed him as if nothing had happened.

Funny thing tho, he has done the same thing various times, sleeping with a girl and then moving on to her best friend, and even worse. He had once slept with the sister of a previous hook up, both within the same week. But he was never the one in this position, it was as if the roles had been reversed. It was weird as fuck and Jungkook hated the feeling of not knowing what to do.

If only he knew how you felt about him, maybe he'd know better how to deal with you.

Jungkook thought you were considerate of him, even if minimally. But he also thought you purposely tortured him because you hated guys like him – which wasn’t too far away from the truth. For Jungkook, it was an unanswered puzzle.

That introspective moment was making him rethink his attitude to Jimin. If you were doing all this just for the sake of your fun, there was no reason for him to take it personally. It was always a problem for him when he got carried away by the judgment of his own dick.

It was new for him to feel that kind of feeling. It wasn't really remorse, but it was a feeling that he could have looked at things differently. This had never happened. Most of the time Jungkook thought he was right and went on living.

He felt weird.

His thoughts then returned to you. Jungkook remembered the girl talking about classical literature in his car. She was a nice girl, a nice person to be friends with, but not something he was used to doing. He fucked and left.

He didn't even know if you would want to be friends with him, but he preferred to ignore any and all possibility of getting closer to you than usual.

The rest of his day was like that: complete boredom, and the certainty that this week he would resolve his "situation" with you. Whether it's finally going to bed with you or ending that chase for good.

On Monday morning Jungkook didn't have his first class, but he was determined to find you. So, he woke up early and, as confident as ever, headed off to college. People had already seen him walking down those halls anyway, it wouldn't make a difference.

Luckily for him, he saw you heading towards the Classical Literature corridors. He hurried to stop you on the way and spare himself any more stares from your fellow humanities.

“Hey!” He yelled, trying to reach you.

You turned to him with a frown. He found it amazing how carefree you always looked.

“Are you lost?” You asked, convinced.

“I don't think so. I think I'm really where I'm supposed to be.”

You chuckled. “God. You’re impossible.”

Jungkook couldn’t help to smile at you, he realized that you had enjoyed seeing him there. Maybe just like him, you liked to feel like you'd gotten attention. If you really liked the attention, Jungkook knew he was on the right track.

“What class do you have now?”

“Latin Literature.” You said looking at him curiously, sounding a little weirded out with that random question. Since when does he care what class do you have?

“Skip it.”

You smiled at the nonsense he had just said, causing him again to smile too.

“What makes you think I would do that?”

This time, it was a different kind of flirtation. Anyone who passed by you could feel the tension involved, but both of you preferred to believe that this conversation was just an exchange of information.

“Well, you're still here, talking to me, aren't you?”

He said smugly while he observed attentively how you bite your lip and take a deep breath.

“Come on, Y/N. Trust me.”

When Jungkook said your name, he noticed that you felt different. As if something had awakened in you. Your posture had softened, and your eyes were steadily staring into his. You were actually considering it. That had to be a win for Jungkook. Finally.

“Fine. Where are you gonna take me?” You asked in defeat while keeping your eyes locked.

“Where do you wanna go?”

It wasn't the best answer he could come up with.

“Surprise me.” You grinned, extremely aware of your own potential.

Jungkook returned the smile and allowed you to lead the way. On the way to the parking lot, several eyes turned to you. He swore to hear people commenting on the two of you but considered himself a little paranoid. It was indeed a crooked path.

Not that he didn't like being seen with a pretty girl, but you were different, smart, you were sure to use that against him at some point.

You walked ahead of him, making your scent leave trails behind. Jungkook was having a hard time there.

The ride in the car was silent. Jungkook didn't dare bring up any subject, didn't want anything you said to be another reason for him to think about the night. Meanwhile, his eyes flickered between the street and the girl next to him. You seemed to be too entertained with the view of the city to start any kind of conversation.

Jungkook found himself staring at your uncovered thighs for several moments. The dress you wore was short and sleeveless, leaving your entire cleavage and legs bare. The feeling running through his head was pure anticipation.

Taking you to his house would be too obvious on his part, so he thought of a place he could take you without seeming absurd and you both could be finally alone.

“Did you just take me to a library?” You said in disbelief when you saw him parking.

He laughed. He recognized it sounded ridiculous at first, but he knew the potential of that place.

“Looks like someone doesn't know how to wait for surprises.”

You got out of the car, still looking confused.

“I skip college and you bring me to a place with more books? What kind of fun is this?”

“Shall we?” Jungkook said, ignoring your little complaints. He wouldn’t say it out loud, but he found you cute with that confused look all over your face.

As the two of you walked inside the library, you were surprised by a female voice that seemed shocked by Jungkook's presence there. The woman walked towards you and hugged him.

“Jungkook? How long have I not seen you?”

The woman was older, had a tired posture, and on her face was a huge smile.

Jungkook raised his eyebrows, looking over the woman's shoulder at you. You looked scared.

“You can't just disappear like that.”

Gradually your features became friendly. You looked at the two in front of you with a slight smile on your face. It was unusual for you to see Jungkook being dear and kind, and he knew that was weird for you.

“I’m sorry, Mrs. Yoon.” He tried to justify but the woman interrupted him.

“Don't give me excuses, start showing up more. How is your father?”

With that question, Jungkook broke the hug. You noticed how quickly his smile dropped but you weren’t going to comment on that. It’s none of your business.

It was a complicated relationship, and Jungkook definitely didn't want to discuss it in front of you or anyone to be honest.

“He is fine. I haven't seen him in a while too.” He said hoping she would wrap up the matter.

“When you see him, tell him I sent my regards.”

“Of course…” He took a deep breath as he stumbled over his own words. “Could you, eh... give me the key to the back room?”

“Sure.” The woman turned to the key ring, and when she came back, she watched you up and down.

“Oh dear, I’m so sorry, how rude of me, I didn’t see you there. You must be his girlfriend?”

Jungkook felt he could die of embarrassment at any moment. Gradually he was already regretting bringing you there. You both exchanged glances and he could see that you were enjoying the situation. You were standing in front of the woman, waiting for Jungkook to answer the question for you.

Oh God, this was so much fun for you, it’s amazing how much a single word can make Jungkook blush. Free entertainment for your eyes.

“S-she’s not. S-she is… She’s a friend of mine.” Jungkook hated himself for stuttering and even more he hated how amused you seemed to be while observing how nervous he suddenly got. “Mrs. Yoon, this is Y/N.”

He watched the two women embrace in front of him. He couldn't hear what you said to each other, but you were smiling as if you were the most sociable person in the world.

“Let’s go?” Jungkook noticed that you were getting comfortable there and hurried you along.

He placed his hand on your back pushing you forward.

“It was a pleasure meeting you, Mrs. Yoon.”

“Likewise. I hope I see you again, sweetie.” The woman said watching Y/N disappear through one of the corridors.

Jungkook and you continued walking in silence, until you let out a low chuckle.

“What are you laughing at? What did she say to you?” Jungkook asked, annoyed.

“Wow, what's with that humor? She just asked me to fix you.” You laughed as you tried to formulate your next sentence. “By the way, where are you taking me?”

Jungkook didn't know which phrase he paid more attention to. The fact that Mrs. Yoon thought he needed a girlfriend to be okay irritated him. Your impatience at that moment also annoyed him.

Appreciating the good relationship between you two and keeping in mind his plans for the future, Jungkook decided to remain silent and continue on his way.

When you finally arrived in front of a small door at the end of the library's central hallway, Jungkook pulled out the key Mrs. Yoon had given him and opened the door. You were at his side, maintaining an eager posture.

He made room for you to enter first and saw you gape for the first time ever. Your eyes stared at every point in the room, as if you were scanning everything.

The environment wasn't much different from the library itself, but there were sculptures and paintings scattered around the corners.

In the middle of the room were two sofas and a rectangular table big enough to hold many books. All the lighting was darker, in yellow tones.

“What is this place? I had never been here before.” You turned to him outraged.

Jungkook laughed weakly. “I would be surprised if you did it. It's my father's collection.”

You continued to walk forward, looking closely at each bookcase. It seemed like it took you a few seconds to process Jungkook’s response when you suddenly stopped and stared at him with surprise written all over your face.

“Wait. Your father has a private library?”

Your disbelief was funny to watch. Jungkook was so used to it all that he didn't understand the appeal. He knew that place would please you and make you easier to talk to. He watched you walk towards a bookshelf in the left corner.

“Do you have a radar?” He asked, referring to the fact that there were Classic books in that corner of the room. He heard your chuckle as you kept observing the books in front of you.

“I still don't believe it, I mean, look at these editions.” You said sounding way more excited than what Jungkook expected.

Jungkook smiled to see you like this. You were like a kid when mom or dad told you that you could have candy before lunch. You were amazed, your eyes sparkled.

In that moment, Jungkook didn't feel like fucking you. It was an almost angelic sight. The level of naivety you were giving off, destroyed all the vision he had about you being a promiscuous girl.

He waited a while for you to leaf through the book in your hand. He didn't want to spoil that for you.

Taking a deep breath, Jungkook remembered his thoughts from yesterday. Maybe this was an opportunity to come clean with you.

“I think I owe you an apology.” The words came bitterly from his mouth.

Definitely not something he was used to. In the last few days Jungkook was doing a lot of new things he never imagined doing. Apologizing to someone was definitely out of character for him.

You closed the book in your hands and looked up to face him.

“Why?”

Jungkook felt the words choke him. The switch in your gaze was insane. You could be very intimidating sometimes.

A silence took over the room before he could finally speak.

“The last few days I... I... I thought very badly of you.”

His breathing was the only audible sound in the room.

“Because I slept with your friend?”

You simply asked without an ounce of embarrassment. Your face was so serene. The way you remained passive in the face of these situations scared Jungkook.

“Well, one minute you were with me at the bar, the next you were with Jimin. Imagine how I felt.” He said in a steady voice.

“One minute you were with your girlfriend, the next you were courting me in that bar.” You shot back in the split of a second with the calmest voice possible. He wished he could sense some type of jealousy in your words, but right now he wasn’t seeing any signs of that. But then again, it was still really hard for him to read you.

He didn’t expect this to backfire. Technically, you were right. He was indeed with Seulgi before approaching to you that night in the pub, but he just wanted you, he hadn’t even invited her. And suddenly he couldn’t even find the right words to respond to your comeback, so he said the first thing that came to his mind.

“She’s not my girlfriend.”

It’s not like you cared…or did you though? You quickly pushed away those thoughts.

You laughed at Jungkook while keeping your gaze on him. “You’re smarter than that, Jungkook.”

For the first time you had called him by his name. Jungkook could feel a shiver down his spine as he heard his name fall from your lips. Your voice was low enough to make him want to forget about the whole argument and kiss you.

He never thought he could win a fight with you, but at that moment he was absolutely sure he had lost.

Your face remained calm; you knew you were dominating him.

“Jimin is my friend.” Jungkook responded, trying to justify what he considered your "mistake".

“So what? I'm single. That’s the beauty of it, I can be with whoever I want. It's not like I'm cheating on anyone.”

You emphasized the last part of your sentence, which made Jungkook realize his disaffection with Seulgi. He didn’t give two fucks if Seulgi slept with anyone else and of course, he himself didn’t care sleeping with others.

He was the same as you, but for some reason he couldn’t pick up, he was feeling insanely annoyed at the fact that you decided to sleep with his friend. And it was even more annoying to see how unfaced you were about it.

“I honestly don't get you. I don't think I ever will.” His voice came out deeper. It was not his intention to argue with you there, but the path the conversation took proved that to be inevitable.

You were a good distance apart, but for some reason the room felt warm.

“It's annoying when someone acts the same way as you, isn't it?” You said narrowing your eyes.

Oh, how well you could read him.

It was so obvious that he was jealous, why? You don’t know the answer to that. And for some twisted reason, that thought alone made you feel so freaking horny.

The infamous Jeon Jungkook was right in front of you, looking hot as fuck at the verge of throwing a tantrum because you decided to sleep with his friend and your panties were getting as wet as possible as the minutes went by. If only he knew.

You didn’t know why your body was reacting this way to his little scene, but you were decided to take care of your horniness right here and right now.

You climbed down a step from the top of the bookcase and walked slowly to the sofa rail in the middle of the room.

Now you were face to face, and Jungkook couldn't hide his nervousness. You watched him swallow hard as his hands squeezed the ledge of the other sofa.

You smiled at him.

“I've seen you a lot, Jungkook. Enough to know how much you love going around teasing girls, hoping they'll run after you.”

You kept walking until you were sitting on the edge of the table between the two couches. “But you should know better by now, I'm not gonna run after you.”

At that sentence, Jungkook let a long, heavy sigh escape his lips. He didn't mean to show how much your words bothered him, but your gaze on him was so strong he couldn't help it.

“Do you have any idea what you do to me?” Jungkook said, taking a step forward.

“I never had to go through this in my life. I never had to go to so much trouble to fuck a girl. You took my peace of mind. You are such a misfortune, Y/N.”

Fuck, he sounded so hot. His voice was barely audible. You both felt all the adrenaline rush through your bodies at that moment.

“Still, you brought me here to fuck me, am I right?”

Your sincerity startled him a second time.

He didn't understand how you could be so rational, so tough to pressure him. The world could be collapsing, and you would still remain passive, with your voice low and your posture straight.

You weren't like him. You were so much better than him.

“Yes.” He replied, without an ounce of shame.

“So why aren't you doing it? Why are you still talking?” You said, holding your gaze on him. “Fuck me, Jungkook.”

That last phrase sounded like music to his ears. He didn’t need to be asked twice.

Jungkook walked towards you, closing the short distance that separated both of you. His eager hands went straight to your face, pulling you in for a kiss. You spread your legs so that Jungkook's body fit perfectly with yours.

For a moment he thought he was imagining it.

As your hands grabbed him by his short hair bringing him as close as possible, one of his hands went to your breast, squeezing it without any courtesy.

The hand that was on your face headed to the back of your neck pulling your hair. With your neck exposed, Jungkook began to alternate between kisses and hickeys, causing you to let out a loud moan.

He was good. Almost too good to be truth. Your body was burning with pure desire. The lust that Jungkook had awakened in you, was something else.

Jungkook took advantage of the short dress you were wearing. In the position you were sitting at the table, the hem of your dress was already at your waist, which allowed him to stroke your thighs freely.

Slowly and deliberately, Jungkook's hand began to caress your inner thighs.

This brat. You knew what he was doing. Or trying to.

“Stop teasing me.” You said through a moan in his ear.

Jungkook smiled while he abandoned the crook of your neck, only to face you. He wanted to see what you looked like when you were losing your mind. When you faced each other, you both felt each other’s hot breaths.

You were a mess, first time seeing you like this and what a sight, your hair was disheveled, your dress was wrinkled, and your face was all flushed.

“You’re beautiful.” He whispered, returning to attack your mouth.

Something jumped in the pit of your stomach, but you decided to ignore it and focus on fucking him. You were feeling desperate for his touch and you could sense that he was feeling exactly the same.

He could feel your fingernails running under his face and hair, making him shiver.

When Jungkook's hand approached your folds, he could feel your panties heavy with your wetness.

“God.” He didn't mean to express himself aloud, but he couldn't help it.

He placed his hand on the edge of your panties and lifted his gaze to yours. He didn't need permission, but he felt he should have it.

“Please.” You begged as your hands climbed under his shirt. Fuck, he really works out – you think - you catch yourself salivating when your nails run over his six pack.

Jungkook thought for a second about teasing you a little bit more, but even he couldn't stand between his legs.

He pulled away slightly from you to slip his hand under the wet fabric. Looking at you, he could see your reaction when his fingers were finally inside you.

A faint moan escaped your lips. You stared at him with the same intensity as two of his fingers worked inside you. One of his hands gripped your waist, keeping you steady.

With your face resting on his shoulder, Jungkook listened you let out small, high-pitched moans, causing the intensity of his movements to increase. He felt your hardening nipples brush against his chest.

He swore he could cum untouched just by the sounds you were reproducing. He was fascinated with you.

It took no effort for Jungkook to realize that you were almost there. Your body began to shake over his fingers, as if you were hunting for relief.

He pulled your face down and glued your foreheads together. He wanted to see you when you came.

Jungkook increased the speed of his movements, watching you do the same with your waist. You grabbed the strands of his short hair as if your life depended on it.

“I'm gonna… I…I…” Your sentence was brutally slashed by moans that escaped your mouth.

“Fuck, Jungkook.”

Hearing you moan his name as you came motivated him to keep stroking you. It was just like he imagined, even better.

Your face was twisted, but there was a certain concern in your eyes. You wanted him to know that you were going to cum.

“I know.” Jungkook assured you, holding you tighter.

That was enough to make you spill over his fingers. Your legs were shaking, while your breathing was totally uneven.

Jungkook kept his eyes on you, waiting for the moment when you would open yours. Your half-open mouth let out little curses mixed with gasps.

It was Jungkook's personal vision of paradise.

When your eyes slowly opened, and your breathing was steadying, you stared at him hungrily as he licked his fingers deliciously with your scent all over it.

“God. You taste so sweet, Y/N.”

“I want you so fucking bad.” You admitted, taking your hands to his zipper taking him by surprise for what could be the hundredth time already. And God, he was big, so fucking big that you couldn’t wait to feel him inside you.

Unlike Jungkook, you didn't wait for consent. With his erection in your hands, you began to jerk him off as you watched him moan in front of you.

He had thought of this so many times when he was alone. Too many. He had masturbated more times than what he would like to admit at the thought of you. Every time he stroked his dick thinking of you, he imagined that it was your hand instead of his. Imagining how good you would make him feel. And it finally was happening.

He had already given up trying to contain his reactions, his eyes were already closed, and his hands braced around your body, trying to keep steady.

“Oh fuck.” He moaned close to your ear. “I won't last long if you continue this way.”

You pressed the tip of him and saw his body twitch.

“I thought you were better than that.” You provoked him.

“You fucking joking, right?” Jungkook said, gulping. “I've been waiting for this since forever.”

With that, you released him and pushed him away so you could take off your own panties.

Jungkook wasted no time and looked for a condom inside his wallet. Everything seemed to be happening so fast. It was as if that need had been consuming you both.

Duly protected, Jungkook placed himself at your entrance. Teasing you, he played close to your entry, smearing his big cock with all your wetness.

You were losing it. You threw your head back, waiting for him to fill you in. You couldn’t wait any longer.

“I want to see you.” He requested almost in a prayer.

You looked back at him, and this time licked your lips, smiling mischievously.

Jungkook thrusted inside you, slowly, enjoying every inch of you. Your moans and the naughty smile on your face made him increase the intensity.

He was so fucking satisfied.

It was impossible to explain how good you felt. Jungkook pulled your waist, sealing your bodies. You leaned in and the kiss you gave him was now intoxicating him. Every fiber in his body was living to touch and feel your body.

With each thrust, Jungkook felt your walls clench around him, while hearing your smooth moan between his lips.

Jungkook was feeling fucking good. He felt his hands tighten on your body, the softness of your face touching his, your nails digging into his shoulders, into that fucking sleave of tattoos on his arm that drove you crazy every time you saw him.

It was indeed heaven on Earth.

He'd been wanting to fuck you so much and for so long, that he felt his body fail after a few violent thrusts.

“Fuck me, Jungkook.” You repeated like a chant. You knew how much he wanted to hear that.

It felt as if he knew your body from another life. You never felt this horny before and the way he was fucking you was almost animalistic. Just the way you like it.

You brought your hands to his hair, pulling him closer to you. You were practically holding each other as Jungkook fucked you on top of his father's library table.

There was something about that place that gave him the confidence he felt he needed with you. The expectation of someone walking through the door, his father's reaction if he knew, everything in there encouraged him to fuck you harder.

“God. You're so fucking hot.” He whimpered.

A few more thrusts and Jungkook felt a dizziness begin to take over his body. He grabbed you by the hair and kept you looking at him. You opened your mouth and began to moan louder, urging him on.

“Come on, Jungkook. Cum for me.” You begged. “Please.”

Jungkook watched your pleading expression before finishing inside you.

“Fuuuuuuck.”

It was warm, tight, wet.

It was all the possible sensations in the world in one place.

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⏤ author's note❧ okay, i'm not gonna even lie. i admit i had to fan myself as i was writing this chapter 🥵. hope you guys enjoy this new update and as I always say: please give it a lot of love if you like it, reblog, leave your thoughts, send me asks. it will be all very much welcomed 🥰

⏤ tag list❧ @chimsworldsstuff @erica2283 @ahgasegotarmy116

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deersalad · 8 months

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I Mean I'm Sick of Meaning, I Just Wanna Hold You

Tags: F/F, Mariner/T'Lyn, Mari'lyn, Fluff, Friendship, Star Trek, Lower Decks, Kinda Canon compliant, T4T Summary: What's a Vulcan to do with these feelings? Well T'Lyn is about to find out and Mariner is going to be very integral to this journey of self-discovery and deviation from Vulcan norms. "My objective was to be comedic and arouse you sexually, I believe I have succeeded on both counts." Mariner was trying to tamp down her laughter as T’Lyn’s monotone voice hit her like a wave breaking on rocks. She couldn't believe what she was hearing from T'Lyn, who was situated on the couch with her legs crossed in those black regulation star fleet pants - god how does she pull them off so well? But she focused her mind back on the situation at hand, T'Lyn had called her here because of a "peculiar situation" and Mariner could tell that she was acting unusual, she wasn’t meeting her eyes and kept tracing a seam in those form-fitting pants- god she needs to gets her mind of the gutter her friend could be in danger.

"Woah woah wait, is this like pon farr? God wow I've always been curious! But like not in a weird way! I just heard about when it happened to Spock and you know there's those rumors about him and Kirk and I mean back on Earth the humans who repress themselves the most tend to be the freakiest and oh my god I am going to shut up." Mariner closed her mouth and yet her eyes communicated more than enough as they quickly flashed a look from T'Lyn's eyes to her curves that were hugged by that Andorian-blue science officer shirt. She briefly thought of Jenifer but pushed that thought to the side, it wouldn't serve her here, this was an entirely different beast and she had to focus on helping her friend. Mariner mentally decided that the shirt was closer to warp core-blue anyways as T'Lyn began to speak and move imperceptibly closer to her on the couch in her room.

"Well, not exactly. As it seems you are aware, pon farr occurs roughly every 8 years for a Vulcan of sexual maturity, and the symptoms can be quite debilitating and even fatal if not handled. But it is not yet time for my next cycle and I do not feel the regular effects… instead I am experiencing something pon farr-like." T'Lyn's eyes moved the smallest degree downwards and to the right to look at Mariner, who didn't notice.

"Uh huh and you want me to take you to sick bay in case something happens or whatevs? Or like, do you want me to go on a daring adventure with you to find a hot Vulcan doctor who can diagnose you and or help you if this is pon farr?"

"Well, when I invited you here to my room I was not quite certain why I reached the conclusion that it would be most beneficial to call on your aid but now I… I believe I understand the logic I was operating on." T'Lyn again moved a quarter millimeter closer to Mariner who had a visible look of confusion. "Woah like did your Vulcan mind powers detect something special in me that you need?" Mariner said with a wry smile and small laugh before it was cut short by T'Lyn reaching her hand over and touching the very tips of her fingers for a moment. "Well, you are not wholly incorrect," she paused as a shudder passed through her from the hand to hand contact, "I do not believe this is related to my Vulcan nature but is rather a consequence or perhaps comorbidity of my heightened emotions and spontaneity.” T’Lyn placed both her hands in her lap in a futile attempt to stop her from yet again acting so impulsively.

Mariner’s look of confusion was now tinged with worry as she looked on her friend who was clearly fighting some kind of inner turmoil, “hey sorry if my joke was off-color I know this is probably stressing you out and stuff, I can grab T’ana and bring her here if you’re worried about being around the other crew,” Mariner began to stand before being interrupted suddenly.

“No.” T’Lyn still wasn’t looking at Mariner as she let out that singular word that hung in the air.

Mariner waited for a followup and when she received none she decided to venture forth, “hey girl, are you like infected by a parasite or mind virus or something, you’ve just… look I noticed you touching my hand and even I know enough about Vulcans to know that’s way out of character. Usually you’re down to go to sickbay just to see all the weird places people get stabbed so you can record it or whatever, I remember you typing up a storm on Orion whenever someone, usually me, got impaled one way or another. Sorry, god, my mind’s all over the place and wait is this like that one time with the Betazoids? Do I need to give you a pep talk?”

T’Lyn gave a solemn shake of her head, “No, I have no reason to believe that my current status would be affecting your or anyone else’s emotional state. I can logically see why you would consider my behavior odd, the hand touch was an impulsive movement and I do apologize.” Mariner could not believe that she was still dodging around what was going on and why was she so feeling so fucking worked up? She wasn’t thinking straight, “Hey do you want me to get Boims? He knows everything about niche alien conditions, I can also grab Rutherford or Tendi, both of them are way smarter than me and frankly I still don’t see what logic brought you to asking me for help,” she let out a nervous laugh at the self-deprecation, what the fuck was this feeling? WHY WAS SHE THINKING SO MUCH ABOUT JENNIFER?

“No to both counts, I understand I am being vague and not sharing my lines of reasoning and for this I do apologize, I am just experiencing something I do not fully have the words for. I requested your help specifically and I know it was the correct decision. These past few days you have continuously been coming to mind in unrelated circumstances and thoughts, this initially troubled me as I was worried that I may have been psychically projecting onto you. But I had Dr. T’ana run a series of medical diagnostics and there were no abnormalities. Still I requested a copy of the scans she performed, particularly of my brain.” She paused as she felt her hands fighting her to reach out to Mariner, who was still standing.

“Yeah ok all that makes sense and wow you and Tendi really have got to talk about medical shit sometime, but if all the scans were normal then what’s up?” Mariner was still confused and sat on the small coffee table across from T’Lyn, falling flat on her back as her legs hung over the side. She was feeling weird whenever she looked at T’Lyn and that certainly wasn’t helping the situation.

“Well I pored over the documents and images and I could not find anything indicating illness, possession, psychic interference, strange energies, or any other possible source of imbalance. But I started to look at the areas of neural activity on the scan and the part that would be analogous to your hypothalamus was experiencing higher than usual levels of activation but not to such an extent as to alert the doctor…” T’Lyn said this in a way that made Mariner feel stupid for missing something. “And…?”

T’Lyn took a moment to respond, her hands were visibly shaking and Mariner was afraid she was about to cry, "and… well the hypothalamus is one of the oldest parts of the human brain in terms of evolutionary development and is integral to some of the most basic and instinctual parts of your psychology and biology. For us Vulcans it is much the same.” Again she paused completely, and at Mariner’s continued look of confusion and concern she decided to push onwards, “Well, its function is to maintain the homeostasis of the human body via influence of hormones and the nervous system, it regulates many drives, including sleep, hunger, thirst-”

God she was so fucking cute when she went on and on about all the things she knew but Mariner could tell she was stalling and she knew even the tiniest bit of time wasted could mean all the difference between life and death, “hey I’m sorry to interrupt but I have gotta get you moving along, I can tell you’re stalling and if you’re about to reveal to me that you’re going to explode, or liquefy, or turn into a slime in 5 hours or something then I would rather know that sooner than later, so what’s your hypowhatever got to do with this?” God she sounded like her mom, she didn’t want to be stern but she cared a lot about T’Lyn, she was a good friend and Mariner didn’t want anything to happen to her.

“That is what I was about to get to, in Vulcans our analogous section of the brain carries many of the same function but it also works to regulate pon farr, it operates much the same way as the hypothalamus regulating sexual drives but in a much more drastic manner that affects the totality of Vulcan biology. After looking at everything I determined that I seemingly experiencing an activation that is not on the scale of pon farr but is somehow related. I believe this is the reason for my strange and illogical thoughts and behavior and I feel that you may have a solution.” T’Lyn let her shoulders slouch the tiniest bit after getting all this out, as if she were relaxing after an intense exercise.

Mariner instantly shot up into a sitting position and looked at T'Lyn, “oh my god, T’Lyn, you’re not going to die, you’re just horny.” P.S.: So my partner and I watched the new episodes of season 4 and I made a one off joke that's the starting line of this fic and somehow that morphed into the both of us full on writing so here you go: All you Mari'lyn enjoyers I guess can eat up or whatever. I don't have an AO3 account but whenever I make one I'll upload this on there, this was actually a pretty fun writing exercise.

#lower decks #star trek #beckett mariner #t'lyn #t'lyn x mariner #mari'lyn lower decks #mari'lyn #fanfic #femslash #wlw ship #I forgot how much I love writing fanfiction and this pairing is giving me such bad brainworms #star trek fanfic #star trek: lower decks

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danganronpa-headcanons-imagines · 10 months

Note

Kokichi with a very tall (like around 6’1), curvy S/O who is very insecure. He flirts with her constantly but she always thinks he’s making fun of her because she doesn’t think anyone would like her. They’re not together yet.

Height differences are always great, but add in some insecurity and outward affection? *chefs kiss*

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Kokichi with Tall Curvy Insecure S/O

When he first met you god damn did he want to climb you like a tree

He was already used to being short so anyone he liked was naturally taller than him. But you being 6' 1" was something he never experienced. You were a LITERAL foot taller than him! He was entranced

Pretty much instantly he turned on the Ouma charm~

And by Ouma charm I mean the charm of a middle school boy pulling the pigtails on the girl he likes

His flirting is a bit more of a teasing type. It not anything bad, but he definitely likes to poke fun and joke around

Whenever you do something like eat a weird food or have an odd hobby, he likes to playfully gasp

"Aw, you like ketchup on your hot dog? Man, I don't know if this is gonna work out between us anymore..."

You tend to watch TV as a group with your friends. Anytime a couple kisses on screen, Kokichi likes to nudge you in the side

"Hey hey! You know, that could be ussss~ Come on, come on!"

When next to you he likes to give little pokes and pinches to your body, and when you look he gives his little shit eating grin

"You can't blame me when you have a body like that, I can't help myself! You're just too cute!"

Whenever you catch him eyeing you, he gives a little wink

You do notice most of his compliments focus on your body, so it seems like he just wants to get in your pants. I mean, he does. But he actually really thinks you are adorable and so kind! Everytime you laugh or smile he can feel himself melt inside

Anytime you walk in the room he instantly perks up, everyone can see that clearly. He'll jump up from his seat and call out your name sweetly to get your attention

Although he almost constantly washes you with praise and makes flirty comments, they really only make you feel worse. In the past you've had very bad experiences with relationships. There were even a few boys that asked you out as a joke. It fucking hurt then, and it still does now

Also, you've heard from the others how much he likes to lie to others and cause problems. If he's such a well known liar, how could you trust he's being genuine with you? He's probably lying so you'll fall for him, then pull the rug out from under you and laugh

At first you seemed to blush and play along, but as time went on Kokichi noticed you become more and more distant. Sometimes you would even walk right out of a room if you saw him. He knew he shouldn't care that much, you're just a girl. But he soon found himself following you

The more he tried to sweet talk you back, you just kept on walking faster. Eventually it got too much and you just exploded. You told him off, telling him he can stop mocking you already. You were already broken down by the past decade of your life, he didn't need to add onto it

This was the only time you've ever seen him serious. There was no cheeky smile or trickster eyes. The look on his face was almost scary with how serious it was, it sent a chill down your spine

"...Mock you? That's what you think I've been doing?"

As you nervously nodded your head he kept his glare, but then his face gently softened. He opened and closed his mouth multiple times, you could sense his hesitation and inner conflict with his words

When he managed to find the words, his voice was... oddly meek?

"Tch, really? I can't believe I fell for a dumbass like you..." It was in a condescending tone, but his averting eyes showed his anxiety. It was quiet and low, but you heard it loud and clear

Overwhelmed by emotions of all kinds, you quickly wrapped your arms around him. You don't know why you did it, your body just acted on it's own

His body was stiff. Kokichi isn't used to affection, especially physical. Everyone he knows pushes him away both literally and emotionally. This was... weird. Sure he found himself crushing on you, but the reciprocation was NOT expected. Eventually he found himself hugging you back

There were no more words spoken in that moment. It wasn't needed

From then on, Kokichi still continued to tease you, but this time, you understand his intentions and enjoy it

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Jesus lord this turned out long, I am so sorry-

{Like my work? Consider tipping me on Ko-fi! Every little bit counts~}

#danganronpa #danganronpa imagines #danganronpa x reader #danganronpa headcanons #danganronpa v3 #kokichi ouma

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abbofff · 10 days

Text

Chapter One

masterlist

Hi, my name is Ada Williams. I, like many other unfortunate souls, am a daughter of a Greek god. Yes, those exist. No, I'm not crazy (at least not that much). I could go on and on about of my particular childhood and the struggles I got from seeing and experiencing things that adults said were impossible. But I might as well start with one of the very few moments that being a halfblood wasn't that bad.

So this set us up a couple of years ago in September. I had just turned 10 years old a couple days before and I was coming home from my new school I was at because I got expelled from my last one due to some trouble I got into that wasn't my fault. I mean, how could I have knocked the wind out of a bully if I didn't even punch him? I mean, yeah, sure, I really wanted to, but I wasn't going to do it and, of course, no one believed me.

Anyway, on the way home, I saw an oddly large Tibetan Mastiff walking down the street, and for a second, I thought it was really cute until it started barking and chasing me. I ran through the streets of Manhattan until my legs felt like they were burning and my lungs hurt, which led me to an alley with a very rabid dog on my back a couple of meters away from me. On my last hope of not being torn apart, I grabbed a rusty metal rung that had apparently fallen off the damaged fire escape next to me. My grip on the step was slippery thanks to sweaty hands and that I felt more scared than I had ever been.

I didn't know why God was so determined to make me his best warrior, but I tried to ask him to please let me go home to my mom. The dog (who had grown a lot compared to a few moments ago) jumped towards me and I felt a surge of adrenaline and a tingling in my hands with which I managed to grab the metal tightly and as soon as I was going to hit him with the piece of metal a thunder hit the ground and my back hit the wall of the candy store next door. The last thing I saw before I fell unconscious was the dog disintegrating into dust and a lady in a red, white and blue uniform running towards me.

When I woke up I was siting in a chair on a corner with the left of my head rest against the grey bricked wall with a blue coat covering me. I was on what it seemed a storage room filled with a lot of candys and the best smell ever. In front of me, a couple meters away, blonde kid who looked my age was resting his right side against the open door with his arms crossed.

- Mom! The strange girl is awake! - He said as he was looking at me with the most stranged look.

- Percy! Don't say that. - Said a woman appearing behind her son.

- Hi, little one. My name is Sally and he is Percy, my son. How are you feeling? Don't worry, I have already called the ambulance a couple of minutes ago, so they must be on their way already, and when they get here, they can find your parents. -

I loved her voice. It made me feel at ease, it reminded me to my mom. Oh no, my mom. Trought the open door I could see a glass window that view to the street bathed on a sunsets glow. Mom must be home from court already and worrying sick.

- Im feeling good. Thank you for getting me into safety, ma'am. What time is it? - I asked as I got up and grabbed the coat off of me, the boy that now I know was Percy grabbed it and put it on a shelf.

- It must already be past 5pm, I believe - Sally said. - But don't worry, sitting still its the best thing to do now. Listen, I'll wait outside for the ambulance, ok? - She said in a reassuring tone. Then, she looked back at her son -Percy, stay with her and see she's okay - She demanded as she walked trought the door, the boy nodded in response.

- What's your name? - He asked while tilting this head in curiosity.

- I'm Adara, but its kind of weird name so everyone just calls me Ada - Only my mom calls me Adara, and that was she was really serious. And when she was that serious, she made that dog look like a puppy.

Oh damn, the dog, it just couldn't disintegrate. I must have hit my head very hard or something. And with the way the back of my head was kinda sore I assumed that was what happened. Now, about the freaking thunder? I really have no idea, maybe a bare wire. Yes, yes totally what happened.

- Well, if we are talking about wierd names, then i win. My actual name is Perseus, but its very greek and very odd and never really finished liking it, so i just go by Percy. -

I let out a little laugh.

- What happened to you? - That damn curious boy asked.

He grabbed a chair that was behind a shelf and sit next to me and grabbed a plastic bag of blue candy. I didn't actually knew how to respond without ending up in a mental hospital.

-I got chased by a dog and I think I touched a bare wire or something and past out-

- And you are not hurt? Yeah, you are wierd but maybe in a cool way. - He said. Oh, I thought. Nobody has ever called me cool, and I was called a lot of adjectives by my dear fellow classmates.

Percy opened the bad of candy - Want one? - He asked kindly.

- Of course. -I grabbed a couple and put them in my mouth. - They are so good!! I didnt even know they selled all blue jellybeans. - He smiled fondly.

- They don't, me and my mom separated them. My stupid stepfather said blue food its not a thing. We want to prove him wrong. -

- Yeah well, he can shove his words up his butt. - I laughed and he did too. Maybe Percy wasn't that bad after all.

- Are you 10? What school do you go to? - it was my turn to ask something.

- Yup, I turn 10 in august. I don't go to school right now. I got expelled of the last one and same with the other three schools before that one. So its getting hard to find a new one. - He said like it was the most common thing in the world but he still seemed pretty sad.

His face didn't show it, it must probably be because he is used to it, I would know, I have been in his spot a lot of times.

- Oh, I'm sorry.- I smiled kindly at him, I knew exactly how he felt.

- Well, I think you are pretty cool too. So maybe you could shoot a shot at my school. -

He looked very confused.

- If you haven't already been expelled of that one at least - We laughed again.

It would be nice to start the year with a real friend. I wasn't exactly disliked in school but I was the kind of person that was kind to everyone but friend of no one. I never fit in enough to have a real friend. But I had a feeling he was different.

I told him the name of my school, and after 15 minutes waiting, his mom came back with two doctors. They checked me up and said it was nothing to worry about. After the doctors where gone Sally asked me my mom's number so she could call her. And left the room again.

- Hey, do you wanna hang out some day? We could try to make blue food If you like. - I said.

I know we just met, but I really liked him. He felt familiar, not in a way that we already had met but in a way that somehow I knew he was a good guy.

- Yeah, sure! I would love to - He responded. He sounded very exited and I was to. Then, Sally got in the room.

- Your mom's on the way, she sounded really worried but I got to calm her down. You sure you are fine, right kid? - She said pretty preoccupied.

- Yeah ma'am. Thanks a lot for the help - I turn back to look at Percy - and for the amazing blue food. - I laughed.

Suddenly my mom came in the store shouting my name. My mom's name is Amelia Williams. She was a beautiful blonde with green eyes that held the kindest of looks, although they seemed to held a worried looked almost half of the times they looked at me. I hated to make her worried, I knew life as a single mother wasn't easy but I always seemed to manage to make it a lot harder despite my tries of being good.

I came out of the storage room looking for her. And I saw her, she was still on her blue suit with stripes. She must have got off court late and on her way home when she got the call. She wrapped me in a tight hug and let out a heavy sigh.

- I'm so glad you are ok. That thing didn't bite you or anything thing? - She asked worryingly

- No, mom. The doctors said I'm good to go. - I said with a smile in hopes to calm her down.

We separated and she looked behind me. Sally and Percy were out of the storage room too now.

- Thank you so much for looking out for her. I don't know how I could ever repay you - My mom smiled fondly at Sally, and she responded with one of her own.

- Don't worry, I'm a mom too - Sally was smiling at Percy now and he was looking at his mom with a embarrassed smile.

- Well, I have an idea. - I said, and now all eyes were on me. - Could Percy come home someday? - I asked my mom with pleading eyes. Then she looked back at Sally.

- If that's alright with you, I believe we can arrange something. - My mom said.

Then Sally looked at Percy, and he gave her his own set off pleading eyes.

- Yeah sure, you already have my number anyways. - She said smiling.

After that talk and a hang out planning, my mom and I said our "see you soon" before getting in the car. And while we started making our way home, Percy and Sally waved goodbye from the candy store door while smiling.

And that's how a met my best friend, my brother.

#clarisse la rue x reader #clarisse pjo #clarisse la rue x you #dior goodjohn #clarisse la rue x y/n #clarisse x reader #clarisse la rue #percy jackson #percy jackson fanfiction #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo #pjo spoilers #pjo show #original character #fanfic #fanfiction #clarisse la rue fanfiction

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mxtxmusings · 1 year

Text

svsss characters as hozier songs

bingqiu weird mushroom time - in a week

and you haven’t moved an inch / such that i would not know / if you sleep always like this / the flesh calmly going cold

you cannot tell me this doesn’t give major binghe shizun is not dead i can bring him back vibes

this whole song is just essentially that entire arc

sqh literally complained about bingqiu being too cottagecore

what is more cottagecore than just rotting in the woods next to your lover

we lay here for years or for hours / your hand in my hand / so still and discreet / so long we become the flowers

mushroom sqq

honestly there’s no particular line that stands out to me

besides the refrain i’ll be home with you

i can already imagine the bamboo house

there’s just something so macabre but also tender about this song

PLUS IT’S A DUET

THIS SONG WAS LITERALLY MADE FOR THEM YOUR HONOUR

bingqiu post abyss - as it was

just as it was, baby / before the otherness came

and tell me if somehow / some of it remained / how long you would wait for me? / how long i’ve been away

the idea of a haggard hero who comes home and is greeted by their lover

and comforted by their unchanging love for them

it’s what binghe wishes he could have gotten after he fights his way out of the abyss

but strangely i think the hero coming home is actually shen qingqiu in some ways

lbh came home literally but it is sqq who realizes that he never changed

aka binghe is still a simp

i keep on putting bingqiu together

shang qinghua - be

when the man who gives the order / is born next time ‘round on the boat sent back

when i have no kind words left, love for you

be as you’ve always been (lover be good to me)

if this whole song doesn’t scream shang qinghua during the side stories

idk how to help you

there’s literally a part about when the master is crossed

he literally begs mobei jun to treat him better like idk how to tell you how obvious these parallels are

the energy is 100% different though

but i like that mobei-jun doesn’t magically change or feel different about sqh

turns out their dynamic is just weird as fuck

even jesus can’t take the wheel of their relationship

your honour they are simply incompetent and incapable of proper communication despite one of them being a demon general and the other one being god

mobei-jun - blood upon the snow

the world that hardens as the harsher winter holds / the parent forced to eat its young before it grows

it’s not my arms that will fail me / but this world takes more strength than it gave me

are you seeing the vision

i mean it’s pretty obvious from the cover art

and also the general vibes

the song talks a lot about the brutality of nature, of the world, and how difficult it is to survive

there is a sense of isolation in the song, as though it is better not to get close than to be hurt because that is all they have ever experienced

honestly felt like the whole situation with mobei-jun’s uncle and also his general distrust of people

liu qingge - shrike

i couldn’t utter my love when it counted / ah, but i’m singing like a bird ‘bout it now

this is more about blaming yourself for a breakup

even though that relationship wasn’t always positive, there were still good aspects to it that are missed

but in this case, i see it more as the regret of not even trying

also because i think lqg is incapable of winning i’m so sorry

you snooze you lose

not like he could compete against the protagonist but man didn’t even try

it may seem like i always bully him (which i do) but fun fact he is one of my favourites

bro literally fumbled so bad with sqq though i’m sorry how does he have negative rizz

yue qingyuan - foreigner’s god

she feels no control of her body / she feels no safety in my arms

you cannot tell me that this doesn’t feel like his relationship with both shen jiu and shen yuan

except not literally cheating but yknow

like the vibes are all there istg

i promise all of the pieces are there

i just can’t explain it

like he lost sj when he left him and then he loses him again after the qi deviation

it’s just hopelessly hanging onto somebody that you never had to begin with yknow

and i mean shen yuan is technically a foreigner…

tianlang-jun - jackie and wilson

looking up from a cigarette, and she’s already left / i start digging up the yard for what’s left of me and our little vignette

i think this song really depends on your interpretation of it!

i’ve seen people say it’s about a person who fell in love with this woman and begins to fantasize about a future with her only for her to not return their feelings

or they are disappointed by the idealized version of a woman they have created in their head, only to realize that they’re not interested in the real person

i think the first one is definitely more accurate to his situation with su xiyan but i could see the second one working too when he thinks that she betrayed him?

either way the naive love from this song felt like the right fit for our resident teenage girl stuck in a dilf demon’s body

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ehksidian · 2 months

Text

The Girlies get some HRT (Human Replacement Therapy)

(Based on the Dragon HRT comics @ayviedoesthings has been doing, and a little bit of a writing exercise on our part! Wanted to take a specific angle of "how would this work with plurality", so here it is!)

-----------------------------------------

Day 0, Week 0, Month 0: Initial Appointment

Having to wait for a doctor’s appointment always set us on edge, and this one was no different. Even with a whole half a year of preparation - dramatically reduced compared to what we were initially told - it didn’t make it any easier. The smell of disinfectant hung heavy in the mostly empty lobby, the smell scorching the hairs of our nose. We must’ve walked in right after they cleaned the place - and with no one but us and the receptionist in here, it felt weird to complain about it.

The receptionist paid us no mind. She knew we’d be arriving today, of course - the incessant phone calls we made in the week beforehand made sure of that. And, besides, we doubted that she wanted to stare at someone constantly fidgeting and squirming in a chair. Not that she’d realize it was all four of us being equally nervous.

God, Rose, I mean people are going to know eventually what’s going on with us given…y’know…

I took a deep breath, held it, and exhaled slowly. I was doing our best to calm us down but it was hard. Staring at the floor wouldn’t help, so I closed our eyes for a moment. A brief reprieve from the outside world, but not totally. I had to make sure to pay attention to when our name got called. The darkness on the inside of my eyelids gave way swiftly to a familiar location - the same living room the four of us usually hung out in.

Right.

An explanation.

My name is Rose Styla, and I share a body with three other people. Most people would hear that and say I’m irreparably mentally ill and detrimentally so, and as such that’s something we keep on the down-low. I wasn’t usually the one who piloted our shared body, but it just happened to fall on me on this specific day. And when we got stressed out…well, turning inwards to talk to everyone sometimes helped

I glanced down at my hands - different from the ones in reality. All four of us shared that disconnect in common, a total division between what we knew we should look like versus our body. The only place we got to properly be each of our real selves was in here, and I was no different. I flexed my hands - watched my fingers curled, appreciated the pitch-black fur and red claws that adorned each of my fingers, pressed by blood-red pawpads together and sighed. A fox of some kind - that’s what I was. Black and red, still on two legs despite how little I felt I shared with humans.

I heard - or felt, more like, for how things were experienced in headspace - someone cough next to me. My right ear flicked at that sound. I didn’t even need to look to know exactly who it was.

“Yes, Xena?”

Another member of the system shifted to my right. She was the one who normally handled the body, and considered herself our “host”, though that term meant little to us with how often us four swapped. Regardless, she usually was the one handling the outside world more often than not. And I could feel just how antsy she was. Her fidgeting was making the entire ratty couch the two of us were sitting on shake a bit.

“C’mon,” Xena groaned, “you can at least look at me!”

I rolled my eyes and turned my head to look at the dragon I shared a body with. Well, dragon wasn’t quite correct in this instance - she was too small and furry right now for that. A little ratlike creature of some sort stared back at me, stark-white fur marked with a smattering of lavender scales here and there across her whole body. She had a small fur-lined vest and a pair of short shorts on, which was about what I expected. And, of course, she looked both anxious and annoyed at the same time. That’s usually how she looked when she wasn’t fronting and wasn’t in her usual full dragon shape.

I smiled a bit, feeling my lips pull back from my muzzle ever-so-slightly. A very human expression, sure, but given how we were all socialized as such it still didn’t feel that odd. “Sorry, Xena,” I said.

She just crossed her arms and huffed, “I hate this. The doctor’s a fucking dick.”

My smile dropped. Last time we were here, she was the one that had to talk to the doctor rather than me, and it was less than pleasant according to her. Something about an overwhelming urge to slap his bald head after he said it’d take four years to get approved. She refused to say how she managed to get that cut down to six months, and for once it wasn’t a memory we shared. Though judging from the smile she flashed when saying she did that, I had a pretty good feeling it did, in fact, involve satisfying that urge of hers.

“I know, Xena,” I sighed, “but he’s literally the only person prescribing this anywhere near us.”

She simply grunted and flung herself off the couch, her tail trailing behind her as she did so. The sheer aura of grumpiness emanating off of her was starting to rub off on me, even, but I did my best to shake it off. Out of all of us, she was the least happy about how we were going about this process. Not because she wanted to remain human - far from it - but because she wished for a different treatment. Even with how grumpy she was, though, I could tell she was happier we were doing this than staying human. She wouldn’t get to be the ice dragon she usually saw herself as, but this was the next best thing for us. I watched her plop herself down on the floor and pout about it, and stifled a bit of a laugh. Always a drama queen.

The other two of us - Penny and Willow - probably were busy pacing up in their own shared bedroom out of anxiety. This wasn’t a great day for us to talk with how anxious we were, but I was sure that they’d come down eventually. Probably once we got our treatment confirmed and secured, I figured. I almost wanted to go up and check on them-

“Miss Krau? The doctor will see you now.”

Our eyes snapped open and I glanced upwards. I could feel our heart race now as the receptionist finally said our name. Our eyes drifted to the clock - it had only been about five minutes, but it felt far longer than that. Anxiety tended to do that. We stood, straightened the simple graphic t-shirt we had on (it had some cute foxes on it, because of course I want to wear our cute fox shirt), and we made our way to the indicated door. The roar of our heartbeat in our ears was loud, sure, but not loud enough to keep us from hearing where to go. Two doors down, on the right.

We walked that way, our black shoes squeaking slightly against the tiles on the floor. I was still a little surprised that it was tile back here, carpet felt like it’d have been more appropriate and easier for both paws and hooves to walk on…but whatever. We stopped in front of the doctor’s office, sucked in a breath, and opened the door.

The doctor sat behind his desk, hands steepled in anticipation for our arrival. Had I not known any better, I would’ve assumed he intentionally wanted to look as abjectly evil as possible. The fact it looked like he literally just polished his bald head didn’t help. I had half a mind to ask him about his skincare routine, but decided against antagonizing the only person who could help us deal with the whole “being stuck in a human body” problem. His small round glasses glinted in the sterile light of his office, and he unsteepled his hands just long enough to gesture to the chair in front of him. We obliged, pulling it out and plopping ourselves down.

“Greetings, Miss Krau,” the doctor started, “I trust you are doing well today?”

I gave him a very shaky smile and nodded our head. “Just…a little nervous, doc, but the happy kind. So the treatment we discussed in our last meeting…?”

The doctor nodded at us, and reached into his desk. He pulled out a sheet of paper and passed it over to our side of the desk. “Yes, about that…” he started.

Our heart sank for a brief moment. Was he going to say that it wasn’t possible? He had told us it would be complicated for sure, but if it was impossible…

I glanced down at the paper. It was the specification sheet Xena gave him last time - the body all four of us had fully agreed upon. There were some red lines and notes scribbled across it in a few particular spots, but it looked mostly unaltered. I scanned it briefly, reading over each note. I knew what the body looked like - a white-furred dragon-fox hybrid with deer hooves. Hybrid treatments were difficult to get, but possible, and it was always a gamble if we would successfully get this particular body. We were banking on the body being mostly fox making it far easier to work with. Adding wings to our back, giving us hooves, and changing the tail to be a bit more draconic felt fairly feasible for treatment in our eyes. There were backups, of course, but we knew this would make us happiest collectively. One of the notes we added - a note about how we wanted a few of the fur patches on the body as well as our pawpads, scales, wings, hooves, and one streak of hair to change color - had a star next to it. The hooves also had a star next to them. And, of course, a small star next to the hands.

“Now, as we discussed before your ideal body is…difficult to do,” he said, “and I was unable to ensure you would get everything you requested. Chromatophore additions in every requested area were impossible to accomplish, namely in the hooves. The other requested locations were doable, however. Additionally, I highly advise against losing a finger if you intend to go no further along in your thereotypic treatment…”

I blinked and looked up at the doctor. “Oh, sorry, that’s my bad,” I muttered sheepishly, “the missing finger on each hand was a mistake on my part.”

The doctor raised an eyebrow. “Fair enough,” he said. “I also wanted to double check with the…physical build of your treatment as well. You are currently on feminizing hormones, yes?”

I nodded, and crossed my arms over my chest. It hadn’t been too long since we started taking normal human HRT - only about three years. But it worked well enough for us as a stopgap solution. I glanced back down at the paper and said, “Yes, that’s correct.”

“And you are certain that you want this body to appear more gender neutral rather than feminine? No breast tissue?”

I nodded again. That was a concession that we made as a group - Willow and Penny both preferred our body being more gender neutral to alleviate their dysphoria, and Willow especially insisted on that. Xena and I didn’t mind giving up on our breasts too much if it meant no longer being human. And, besides, it wasn’t like we were going back to being masculine.

The doctor let out a hum, before pulling the paper back to himself and stowing it away. “I just wanted to confirm that. It is rather uncommon for a request like that to come through, and I wanted to ensure it also was not a mistake like the digit count.”

“No, doctor, not a mistake. Personal reasons that w-” I started, before covering my mouth. I almost said we to someone who didn’t know our situation. Accidentally outing ourselves now at this juncture was the last thing I wanted to do, so I feigned a cough. He tilted his head at me slightly, but seemed none the wiser.

“...Sorry. Personal reasons that I don’t want to get into,” I said.

Smooth, Rose.

I let Xena’s comment slide by me. The doctor simply took out another sheet of paper and a pen and slid it over my way.

“In that case, miss Krau, all you need to do is sign this waiver stating we have thoroughly gone over all the side effects and potential complications from your treatment. We already discussed them last time, but to review-”

I held up a hand. “No need, doctor. I understand. Pain, dizziness, alterations in hearing, inability to walk while hooves come in, tooth loss and regrowth, and it being irreversible…I’ve been prepping everything for this for a bit.”

The doctor nodded. “Good.”

I picked up the pen and set it down on the paper. All I had to do was sign it, and this would mark the beginning of the rest of our lives. Everyone else we knew who went through this theriotypic treatment told us how viscerally unpleasant some days were, but all of them were just as eager to tell us how happy it made them. We knew we’d be just as happy as everyone else once the treatment finished, even if the journey would be a bit of a grisly nightmare at points. One of our friends, a deer, painted the rather unpleasant picture we expected in terms of what hooves coming in would feel like. That wasn’t going to be fun. But…god, it was going to be worth it for us.

I could feel the doctor’s piercing gaze burrow into the top of my head as I stared at the paper. It felt like an eternity had passed while we thought about this, but it probably was only a second or two. I took one last breath. The pen slid across the paper with ease, and I signed our agreed upon name on the dotted line. Zee Krau. My hands shaky with anxiety and joy, I slid the consent form back over to the doctor. He took it, and handed me another slip of paper. I knew what this one was though.

A prescription.

“Take this to the specialist pharmacy, they should have it in stock now,” he said. “And good luck, miss Krau. You’ll need it.”

I bit our tongue slightly to keep Xena from snapping back with a comment on not needing luck. Even when she wasn’t up front and piloting our body she loved to comment like that. Instead, I simply smiled and thanked him while taking the prescription. It was only a sheet of paper, but it felt heavier than lead in our hands. Maybe that was just how light we felt from finally being through with this.

The first step on our journey away from humanity. It hardly felt real, but it was. We finally would have a body that, at the very least, reflected our inhuman nature in some way. It might not be perfect for all four of us, but it was something at least. There was no looking back and no doubt in our heart that this was the right move for all of us.

Even if Xena really wanted to take dragon HRT instead.

#ehksidian writing #therian stuff for us #plurality #therian hrt

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jalebi-weds-bluetooth · 2 months

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hello hello hello Jalebi! And I’m sorry it was really weird of me to not say hello in my previous ask :((

In context with the same (ask), I really loved that you pointed out all the scenes with the song, and how it impacted the whole story build up. Yk, Before watching ipkknd, I went through a whole phase of watching the ‘realistic’ romance movies in Hollywood. The ones that make the viewers relate with the protagonists, because we’ve all been heartbroken in some point of our lives, and that all romances do not end up in happily ever afters. The before trilogy, 500 days of summer, eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, normal people and many more. My perspective on love and romance changed completely over the past 2-3 years, and it kind of was good because I got familiar with the real picture. (I grew up watching bollywood films and read wattpad as a teenager, which was obviously, really like a strawberry-duniya) But now, I’m finding myself again going back to my childhood dreams and fantasies, like love is ‘meant to be’, or ‘true romance is aided by the divine’, ‘the red string theory’ and something of that sort. I’m scared that this might end up making me feel that ‘realistic love’ is inadequate. I have fallen in love with the way romance and love has been portrayed in ipkknd, and I don’t think i am getting over it anytime soon.

Hello hello,

Omgh Anon please don't worry - I wasn't in the best mood either!

Ok, time for Jalebi to crack her knuckles and give a drop of two of reality sweetness and advice.

Romance is really about the way you feel. The way you imagine it to be. There's nothing ever right or wrong about the way romance works because there's no one way to define this notion of romance.

You see the best way to understand this is to really understand the way IPK showed how Arnav and Khushi experienced romance.

For Khushi always believed in what films and books sold her - she believed romance to be flowers, stars, seeing the person everywhere and so on and so forth. Thus when she fell for Arnav, she literally felt all this because this is how she was conditioned and believed romance would be.

Arnav, pragmatic in nature, truly never believed in the commercialized version of romance. What he did believe in was care being romance. He did NOT believe in Anjali's definition of romance. What he did believe is what he saw between Anjali and Shyam. The fact that his sister, so deep in love, cannot function if her beloved is in danger. She has a strong physiological response to Shyam. And Arnav does believe Anjali loves Shyam and vice versa. He does not believe love making the heart go fast, but he is aware of how an extreme emotion can affect the body. So the night he understands love (which he has been questioning for some time now) he realizes his care for Khushi was exaggerated, he collapsed at the thought of her harm and his extreme physiological reaction - racing heartbeats to restlessness - it's all due to and for Khushi, leaves him in a sombre realization.

The point here being you can never point out which version of romance is more accurate cause even if fiction, people feel love differently even for the most basic things.

If you are a romantic at heart and now believe larger than life things - from fate to God - play a role at romance, then even the most realistic thing like the person you like dabbing away your snotty nose during a cold will feel like the MOST romantic thing in the planet. You will see fate in this, you will feel the violins.

But if you're a realist at heart, then even at the most GRAND entry of your crush - helicopter and all - you will see the smallest things that matter to you. Such a small smile your hero throws your way before he goes for his day.

What we must understand though is that situations don't lead to love. Your feels and circumstances are two very separate things. I, at one point, used to believe that "Oh I'd get great love only if I go through the intense difficulty and push pull and fight with destiny"

Now that is a problem because a lot of the circumstances in IPKKND are best left to fiction. If realistic love doesn't appeal to you on screen - totally makes sense, heck I'm always down for grander schemes of love ON screen.

But in real life, it's really the realistic love that leaves you with the joy the grander shows love. It's the green flags, the safety, security and just goodness of it all that's really appealing.

Trust me when I say this, an honest intelligent conversation has had my heart racing faster than being backed into a wall 'a la Khushi'.

And the human mind is such, it can frame events into your head based on your definition of romance.

If I'm a hardcore romantic, then I will find divinity in reality and if I'm a realistic I will find realism in divinity. Because when I'm liking someone, I'm trying to find WHAT appeals to me.

And one really important thing to realize is that fate does NOT dictate one to be in your life when they're causing you grief. IPKKND is written as a romance that was not meant to have happened.

If you get an ASR - run. If you get a Khushi - run as well. One is too egoistic and the other is too idealistic.

Also realism does not mean passionless or things not being fated. It just shows you multiple other perspectives can happen. Yes, there's a certain escapism in these fantasy stories, but I also believe remarkable things can happen to absolutely ordinary people as well.

And you don't have to get over IPKKND at all - enjoy the vibes, enjoy the feels. Don't idealize the situations that Arnav and Khushi faced to get to love, but definitely idealize the power in their love.

Love's power is universal.

Love love love,

Jalebi

P.S: Talking about realism, it is interesting to note that the second time Khushi actually falls for Arnav (not infatuation) is when the littlest things happen.

A box of bangles cause her previous one broke, assisting her in serving the guests cause the waiters ditched on her, or simply telling her that the saree she chose first was the better one.

Nothing remarkable at ALL and this is as realistic as love gets, and as beautiful too.

The grand gestures of dance, kiss and mehendi's 'A' make her uncomfortable. His soft smile and showing up, personally, to her house in the morning is what touches her.

#ask #anon #jalebi's two cents #chill my dear #love is perfect in its odd way #HUMANS ARE MEANT TO CHANGE #perspectives always shift

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glaivegirl · 4 months

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sometimes, if you tell someone you thought they had a van, theyll squint their eyes and nod a slow, solid, groovy yes at you

watch the mere concept of being a van owner wash over them, see the moment when they feel it get groovy, then you can see how groovy the idea of being a loser stoner with a van can elevate a loser stoner with an open mind and a sweaty cock

you cant just choose anyone, you need to find the right stinky loser, maybe she thinks the weed smell covers her hair odor and thinks that maybe the stinks combine into something boho-grunge-something she forgot that finishes the style combo shes going for. she sounds like a fuckin idiot right? wrong, that boho shit? many do it, but some do it so well, no one would dare utter the boho part. because its almost an insult, to her, she says she hated that word and what she made doesnt have some stupid appropriated foreign language all over it, i cant stand the twine, it get rougher and less stable every year i hate boohoo.

shes fucking perfect, this is what gets even the most experienced van-seeders: you have to check, double check, triple check, and im not kidding quadruple check, does she already own a van. just look around or ask her if she has any sick wheels. sick wheels is something you should only use if you need to make absolutely sure. most prime van stoner stock, will be delighted by such a cool, antiquated, and pleasant word to the tongue. And they may begin imagining cars that they'd imagine if you said sick wheels.

im so sorry, she does have a van, and she wants you to come inside the smell is more than you have ever experienced, youre not sure what it is besides weed, cigarettes, and just sex, just the smell of sex like a sweaty dick is cumming a fat load into an even sweatier pussy and now shes squirting

the smell is descriptive, you hop in and get the dicking of a lifetime, youll never forget her, you start brushing as a hobbby, then you get better, some van guys you made make for steady work. youre in demand. you finally buy that van, just because this is your life's blood. youre not better than them, why should you not embrace being 34 and let the van cradle you into your human years. its your van, itll be the best youve ever done. something generic, but something magical, someone who cheats at cards with arcane elementals and lies her way out of hell with a demon's cock ring in her palm. summons the demon, didnt have to be a cock ring, love her for that. ha, my wizard, god its coming together so well.

you finished it months ago and all your friends loved watching it come together, you take a trip, a good, solid, american highway road trip. youre at a taco bell where the people keep trying to do customer service at you, weird at a taco bell. "over there, haha" on that low, moss covered cliff. and you smell something familiar but thick and less clean somehow than even the dirtiest van bro youve had to smell in the shop. but you get, crazy horny, and you look at the wizard on your van. she appears behinid you, the rural white taco bell employee cant handle a category 12 wizard penis. it beaches onto the taco bell, kiling a senator who was only there for a photo op. yall start fuckin again, she says she felt her image, her visage being tugged from somewhere. You fall in love, she says shes 900 but she says when i was a kid a lot and usually shes going to like a mcdonalds before they removed the playplalces, so like 60, shes so hot for 60, i never thought id think of the age of 60 and want to fuck it so fucking much. and you do. at first your friends are upset at having to leave the van, but she kicks them out really aggressively and its kinda hot. theyre all weak willed stoner dudes, so you kind feel bad until you realize how its like the horniest you ever seen them. you all fuck all the way to some place called the mormon epicenter. which was honestly better than the san antonio pier thank god. you saw a demon kind in a thousand robes being offered children from every nation, and you have too ask at this point, why is this mormon, she says she said that as a joke which is extremely comforting since you like like 4 hours from salt lake.

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quipxotic · 6 months

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A couple of thoughts about c3e78; spoilers below, obviously:

First of all, I loved it so much! Story is always the thing that hooks me, which is why, even though I like fights in D&D, it's RP that lights me up. 4 hours of professional actors leaning heavily into the angst? Yes please! Sign me up. (As an aside, this is also part of the reason I love Candela so much.)

So many people have said it, but I missed Orym. It'll be fine, Liam will slay us all when he comes back and in the meanwhile it's free space for fan fiction writers to dream up conversations as much as they want. Still, I wish he'd been able to be there.

I've always wondered why I identified so hard with Ashton because on the surface we are nothing alike. But this episode? It made it all clear. The low self-esteem, the intense love and care for other people without the ability to express it in a way that anyone could understand, the awkwardness, the being misunderstood by the people you love most and not even fighting it because of course it's what you deserve, the burning all-encompassing desire for a family who loves you coupled with the knowledge that you may never get it, the suicidal ideation - it's not an exact mirror of a younger version of me, but it's close enough. And it's so cathartic to see it outside of yourself in a fictional space.

And that is part of why some of the fandom's reactions to Ashton are so painful. Look, I don't care if people don't like Ashton - they're a complicated character and people can like or dislike whoever they want. I don't have a problem with characters I like experiencing the consequences of their actions, because that makes for interesting storytelling. I don't have a problem with the reactions of the characters in-world to Ashton's choices. I don't think they're all healthy reactions, but I also don't think they were meant to be. What I do have an issue with is folks being so gleeful about another person's pain, particularly given Ashton's background and mental health issues. And yes, Ashton is a fictional character, but so many of us in the fandom also share those feeling and qualities, if not the same choices, in our real, actual lives. It feels like people punching down, rather than punching up, if that makes sense.

I rarely cry at anything Critical Role, the notable exception being EXU: Calamity which makes me bawl no matter how many times I watch it. But that scene with Laudna giving Ashton the doll completely blindsided me. It was so well done.

So many juicy narrative choices in this episode, I can't wait to see how they cause ripples (or tidal waves) through the rest of the campaign. Laudna's conversations with Delilah. Imogen confessing to FCG (but no one else) that she and Fearne had seen Delilah manifest. Chet comforting people and challenging them in a mix of endearing uncle and manipulating asshole energy. Fearne's anger, at herself as well as Ashton, and her praying at the Raven Queen's temple. Gwen breaking windows! Ashton and Percy's talk. Just so many good moments.

Getting to visit Nana Morri again feels like a present just for me. I love her weirdness and her funky house, it's all just the right kind of creepy to delight me. And the fact Allura is there with Bell's Hells is a bonus.

I'm also thrilled because I think Ashton taking the shard, it rejecting them, and the aftermath has defused one of the potential time bombs that Taliesin's been hinting at for months, mainly Ashton trying to take down the gods as a means of finding someone to blame. I am not particularly attached to any of the gods of Exandria, but that wasn't a plotline that interested me at all.

I'm sure I'll have more useful, detailed thoughts later, but for now I am just so pleased.

#critical role #bells hells #c3e78 #critical role spoilers

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thebibliomancer · 8 months

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Essential Avengers: West Coast Avengers #42: ONE OF OUR ANDROIDS IS MISSING!

March, 1989

It begins here... VISIONQUEST ONE OF OUR ANDROIDS IS MISSING!

Oh, comics. You and your movie references.

Scarlet Witch: "Where is my husband? Where is the VISION?!" Wonder Man: "He -- he's gone, Wanda -- vanished as if he never existed!"

God damn it, Byrne. You know I love dialogue on comic covers.

But we're kinda jumping into things here. I don't even really feel like we need to do a last times recap because the start of Byrne's run feels like its taken a time skip forward.

Tigra has rejoined the West Coast Avengers. Hank Pym has rejoined the West Coast Avengers. WASP HAS JOINED, as more than a guest star!

Despite the cover declaring OH NO VISION IS MISSING, the beginning is a slow burn, establishing the normal functioning of the West Coast Avengers.

Implying that this new status quo has lasted long enough to be comfortable.

The Byrne run is contentious, in part due to the very story arc starting here.

BUT I WILL BE FAIR!

So lets get into it.

Scarlet Wanda wakes up from an uneasy sleep to find that despite the early hour, her robo-husband Vision is not in bed with her.

He doesn't need to sleep but still spends his nights at her side (awww) but this morning one of her husbands is missing.

Wanda checks around the guest house that she and Vision have made their home in the West Coast Avengers Compound but no trace.

Also, while she's getting dressed the narration notes that she must practice ABSOLUTE CARE not to accidentally gesture indiscriminately and cause WACKY MAGIC SHIT to happen.

I didn't think she was still experiencing that kind of magical incontinence after her training with Agatha Harkness.

But that's one of the things I've heard about Byrne's run. He prefers a certain, classic portrayal of characters like Wanda and Vision and apparently not burning down houses by pointing the wrong way is a bridge too far.

As Wanda wanders across the compound grounds, she spots Hawkeye up early and training with some absolutely ridiculous equipment.

It's some industrial looking robot arm that flails him around so he can practice his aim even while being flailed around.

I don't know how often that comes up but an ounce of preparation.

Wanda accidentally steps on the one twig on the otherwise immaculately groomed grounds and startles Hawkeye into shooting an arrow right at her.

Wanda just probabilities the arrow to lose all its forward momentum and fall to the ground.

Hawkeye shuts down the flailing and asks why Wanda is up so early. She asks the same thing of him.

Hawkeye: "Er... yeah... Well, since me an' Bobbi have been on the outs there ain't been too many reasons for lying around all day."

Oof.

You can just imagine Clint laying in bed, unable to sleep. Just staring at the ceiling and feeling the emptiness next to him. And then going 'fuck it, I'm going to go shoot things with arrows until I can't feel feelings anymore.'

Having had to admit how empty his own life is, Hawkeye repeats the question to Wanda. She explains the thing where he took off? Maybe? Without letting her know or leaving a sign. Its all kinds of weird and foreboding.

Hawkeye goes well this is why we have "eleventy skillion dollars" worth of the best communications technology.

You seriously didn't try calling him first, Wanda? C'mon.

Hawkeye calls for Vision over the intercom but only gets Hank Pym, who is also working early, running a systems check on the computer system.

See, because, he had a "biostatic analysis running overnight" and the results were off.

Also, what the hell are you doing here, Hank Pym?

You quit to fix your first wife's enormous head.

Well, that's not a happy story. Because when is it ever for Hank Pym?

Big brain lady who claimed to be Maria Trovaya was actually MODAM, the lady version of MODOK. Because MODOK is clearly a gendered name. Her not giant brain name was apparently Olinka Barankova.

She took Hank captive and replaced him with an android imposter that Hawkeye unmasked. Hawkeye and Black Widow (and Mockingbird independently) help Hank Pym thwart AIM's schemes until AIM hit the self-destruct and ran away.

MODAM went on to other things but eventually got killed by Red Skull and put on display like a big-headed trophy. While, apparently, Hank went on to just sheepishly rejoin the team.

Anyway, this went down in the Solo Avengers issue that has the same cover date as this West Coast Avengers issue so I'm surprised there's not a "wondering what Hank Pym is doing here? Check out this month's Solo Avengers for the full story!"

Anyway. Back to the point. The communications system blows out with a squawk. As if the transponder on Hawkeye's side was blasted! Or maybe there's a duck in the wiring! So Hank runs outside to confirm that there is indeed shit going down.

Shit of the most Ultron-y type possible. The Ultron kind.

Really thought he'd be gone longer after Wonder Man ripped him in half.

I know Ultron always comes back but geez.

Meanwhile, inside Tigra's bunglow, she's asleep. Not everybody is awake at ungodly hours! Take a page from her book, the Avengers!

But only the sleeping in part. Not the weird fucking dream she has.

Tigra dreams of being a tiger with a perm, hunting blue alien space deer.

But when she pounces and tears out its throat, she wakes up only to a mouthful of feathers. Having lived the punchline "and when I woke up, my pillow was gone!"

Except, I can't figure out what Tigra is sitting on. Doesn't seem like a normal bed. Maybe its a large, feather pillow and she uses it like a cat bed? Maybe its a small feather mattress and she uses it like a cat bed? Maybe don't sleep on a cat bed and you won't have cat dreams, ya dork.

I canNOT believe that I had live through the drawn-out "oh no, Tigra's cat instincts are getting the better of her!!" plotline and now we're just doing it again.

We're doing Ultron again, we're doing Tigra having cat problems again. Some fresh start.

I do hope her cat problems don't manifest as uncontrollable hypersexuality again.

Tigra is considering that maybe she should tell her teammates that she's having vivid dreams about murdering animals but a loud BOOM draws her attention and she rushes outside.

Also rushing outside is the Wasp! Hi, Jan! You definitely left so I'm wondering if we'll get an explanation for why you decided to come back and join the team.

Also also, Tigra notices that Wasp is flying out of Hank Pym's bungalow, instead of the main house where Jan's room is.

She notices it and thinks hmmmm.

A lot of writers try to put Jan and Hank back together. And a lot of writers try to more definitively break them up.

Englehart was one of the latter. He had Jan yell "divorce means divorce" at Hank when he tried to hug her. He brought back Hank's first wife and basically annulled Hank's marriage to Jan.

But, remember, Maria turned out to be a big, evil science brain so the divorced marriage is unanulled and it seems like Byrne mgiht be one of the former type of writers who want to undo undoing the marriage.

Busiek was one too. One of the creative decisions I wasn't really onboard with for his run but he tried his damndest to sell the idea, including having Hank reconcile (again) all the disparate parts of himself.

Then the following writer Geoff Johns had Wasp shoot down the idea that she'd ever marry Hank again.

It comes and goes in waves.

Less so now that Hank is turbo-dead.

Anyway.

Tigra and Wasp rush toward the training area, where they heard a big boom. And Wonder Man is rushing to check it out too.

Wasp: "Simon! You can fly faster than me! Get up ahead and reconnoiter!" Wonder Man: "Just what I was going to do, Wasp!"

You don't need to get snippy, Simon.

He grouses to himself that Wasp got too used to being in charge and that she's still barking orders like she's Captain America.

I guess there's always gotta be some kind of tension in the team. And Wonder Man always gotta be fighting someone. And he's stopped being the Hawkeye to Hawkeye.

Wonder Man flies up and sees Ultron. And like me, is surprised because he didn't think he'd see him again so soon.

Ultron blasts Wonder Man with "some kind of magnetic field blast." Not usually a weapon Ultron has so maybe he upgraded.

Wonder Man just gets off the tree that he broke with his butt and launches back at Ultron.

Simon William's nearly indestructible fists strike the robot's sterling hide like the clappers of a great bell... The sound that reverberates across the California hills has the ominous tones of a death knell!

Hawkeye cheers on Wonder Man but Dr Pym warns him that Ultron could turn the tables.

COMPLETELY UNPROMPTED, Scarlet Witch has an intense expository flashback about Vision's ENTIRE BACKSTORY.

Important for setting up future stuff but fucks sake, Wanda, get your head in the game.

You should know the drill.

Dr Phineas Horton created the Human Torch, no not Johnny. A lifelike robot that accidentally burst into flames whenever exposed to oxygen.

Jim Hammond Human Torch became a hero, the first Marvel hero. The company wasn't called Marvel but he was in Marvel Comics #1 so there.

Since Stan Lee rebooted Human Torch as a teenage human for Fantastic Four, there needed to be some explanation for why the robot guy wasn't around anymore.

And the answer is that his flame burned out of control and he exploded and collapsed in the desert.

Where he was found and rebuilt by the Mad Thinker who used him to fight the human Human Torch. Until robot Human Torch learned that the Mad Thinker was Evil, Actually, and turned against him.

And the Mad Thinker's failsafe made robot Human Torch explode again.

The Fantastic Four just left him in the Mad Thinker's abandoned base because Reed is an asshole and doesn't believe robots deserve due to the dead.

Where Ultron found him.

Anyway. Back in the here and now, Wanda remembers that she's actually in a life or death fight and that everyone else has been participating while she's been gazing off into the middle distance.

Again: fucks sake, Wanda. You're one of the win buttons against Ultron! Get your head in the game!

But Hank notices that Wonder Man's punches have been denting Ultron. Which should be impossible if Ultron is made of adamantium, as he usually is.

Figuring never asking forgiveness is easier than asking permission, Hank shrinks Wonder Man tiny size and insists he flies down Ultron's throat.

Wonder Man says, uh, no, I don't want to unshrink inside an indestructible chassis, that sounds like a horrible way to spend my time.

But Hank insists so Wonder Man does it but complains the whole time.

The Journey To The Center of Ultron is weird. The usual atomic flame that burns in Ultron's mouth (yes, that's apparently what his mouth glow is) is just an illusion.

Also, when the shrink wears off Wonder Man OH YEAHS right through Ultron instead of that not happening.

Hank explains that when he noticed that Wonder Man was actually denting Ultron, he realized it couldn't be the real deal.

But the (West Coast) Avengers were kept so busy fighting Ultron that they didn't notice the discrepancies.

Until Hank did. And instead of explaining it, he decided to demonstrate it in the most dramatic and visually interesting fashion possible.

Hank, you weirdo.

Scarlet Witch wonders why someone would send a fake Ultron and Hank realizes it was probably a distraction.

Taking charge, he yells "AVENGERS DISASSEMBLE!" which is a big oof with cursed future knowledge. But what he means is everyone split up and search for clues.

If someone was distracting the (West Coast) Avengers from something, its likely to be something around the compound.

Instead of actually helping search, Scarlet Wanda wanders off to the cliffs to moodily stare off at the ocean and CONTINUE TO FLASHBACK.

FUCKS SAKE, WANDA!

Anyway.

Blah blah blah, Ultron found robot Human Torch's body.

He wanted to rebuild it into a cool minion but Ultron apparently sucks at robots. Ironic, since Hank Pym shoulda sucked at robots and somehow built the worst one and Ultron has Hank's brain.

Anyway, Ultron kidnapped the robot Human Torch's creator Dr. Horton and forced him to rebuild the Human Torch into Vision. Making his skin red as a private joke about the flame powers he once had.

Didn't think Ultron's sense of humor ran that subtle, honestly.

After the rebuilding was done, Ultron had to erase the Human Torch's personality because he kept trying to fight Ultron. So Ultron used some Simon Williams brain tapes that he swiped from Hank Pym's lab. And with that as a base, Vision lived!

Ultron sent him to attack the Avengers where he pretty promptly defected and switched sides. And the Avengers accepted him because the Avengers are cool like that sometimes.

And it was on the Avengers that Scarlet Witch met Vision and they fell in love and got married and then Vision dry humped two babies into her, magically.

THAT SURE WAS VISION'S ENTIRE BACKSTORY, WANDA. VERY HELPFUL.

Meanwhile, the other Avengers were actually searching.

Hank Pym contacts her on some kind of video phone that stalks her to the cliffs and tells her that they found something but they really need to discuss it face to face.

And when Wanda joins everyone who was actually doing work, Hank Pym explains that Vision is "gone."

Because A) he's nowhere in the compound. They still don't know where he physically is except 'not around.'

But things have gotten a bit weirder and more sinister.

B) Hank finished that computer scan he was doing and found a sophisticated computer virus. One that found and erased every trace of Vision from the Avengers' files. All the information they had on him, every report he's ever entered, everything.

And the virus infected the East Coast Avengers' computers as well. And SHIELD (not actually around currently, so slight continuity hiccup) and the Pentagon and the Fantastic Four.

Every system the virus infected has lost all trace of Vision.

Its like he never existed. Except for all the memories everybody has of him. And also any physical record like print-outs or photographs. But digitally its like he never existed!

Hank Pym: "For this to have happened means somebody got in through our defensive network. Somebody got past all our alarms, all our codes... Everything!" Wasp: "And to do that... They'd have to be one of us!!" Hawkeye: "One of the Avengers has turned traitor! But... WHO??" Mockingbird: "Is that really so hard to guess, Hawk?"

MOCKINGBIRD

WHAT

DID

YOU

DO?

Follow @essential-avengers and be very angry with me about things that are about to happen. Like, reblog, and comment maybe. I don't know about mockingbirds but my cat definitely tried to stop me from finishing this post.

#west coast avengers #avengers #essential avengers #fake Ultron #Hawkeye #Scarlet Witch #the Vision #Hank Pym #Dr Pym #Tigra #Wonder Man #the Wasp #Mockingbird #a conspiracy against best robot boy #a cover that doesn't quite lie

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