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the-obnoxious-sibling · 4 months

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in which late night sad topics are broached, buggy comes to his senses (???), and we do need to get out of bed at some point, shanks. there are things happening outside your personal drama, you know.

part seven of the post-marineford portion of the near miss fics! (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6) if you have no idea what i’m talking about but would like to read a shanks/buggy story about kissing in disguise and then having to deal with the emotional fallout of doing that, click on this link, that’s the tag for the whole thing in chronological order. (plus a fair bit of complaining about writing, one inspirational improvised musical number, and a snippet of shanks pov) if you do know what i’m talking about: i am afraid this fic is turning into a test case for zeno’s dichotomy paradox, where the closer i get to the end the farther away it becomes. >>; i honestly cannot see how it would take me more than 5k to wrap things up, but i said that last time, and the time before that, so… see you in part eight! eta: i almost forgot!! if a moment early on sounds familiar, you may have already seen the huyandere art that inspired it. either way please enjoy the silliness.

Buggy woke with a start, and didn’t know where he was. The bed was too soft, the person at his back was too warm. And too close, Galdino had so far always curled up facing the far side of the bed, what was he—Buggy blinked blearily at the faint outline of a sake flask on the nightstand. Oh, right. This was Shanks’ room.

The windows above the bed let in a fair amount of moonlight, but the moon was waxing crescent tonight so Buggy couldn’t see much of anything. He hadn’t thought about it when he decided to stay the night, but he didn’t sleep well in new places. Stupid to think that just because there was a familiar person that the unfamiliar place wouldn’t still disturb his sleep.

Ah, well.

Buggy moved slowly, not wanting to wake Shanks if he could help it. It should be possible, they weren’t wrapped up in each other or anything stupid like that… though if Buggy had been asked, he would have imagined Shanks was as clingy asleep as awake. But no, Shanks was close enough that his body heat had soaked into Buggy’s back, but they weren’t touching.

Buggy stretched a little, yawned a little, and rolled over. He couldn’t resist the opportunity to see what a fully grown Shanks looked like asleep. The possibilities were too tempting… what if he had stupidly messy hair, or drool dried on his face, or a big snot bubble on one nostril?

Unfortunately, he wouldn’t get to find out, because it turned out that Shanks was awake. He was lying on his side, in fact, staring at Buggy. Biting back a yelp of alarm, Buggy swatted him on the arm.

“What the hell!” he hissed.

“What?”

“Why are you watching me sleep? That’s so weird!”

“Is it?”

“Very!”

Shanks smiled sheepishly. “Sorry. I just couldn’t sleep, I guess, so I was lying here, thinking…” Buggy open his mouth and Shanks immediately put his hand over it. “I know I set you up for it, but please, no jokes about how hard that must be for me or whatever.”

Buggy made a muffled grumbling sound and shoved Shanks’ hand away. “Thinking about what, then?”

Shanks glanced away for a moment and sighed. “Well, I guess it is after midnight.”

What did that have to do with anything? And then Buggy remembered: his moratorium on sad topics had been for one day only. With a huff, Buggy turned away from Shanks. He didn’t want to see Shanks’ face while he asked his question.

“Buggy. Buggy, look at me? Please?” Shanks’ hand tugged at Buggy’s shoulder, a silent echo of his request.

Silently groaning—he used to say no to Shanks all the time, when had he lost the knack for it?!—Buggy rolled over and said, “Fine. But I get my sad question first!”

Shanks considered him. He nodded. “That’s fair.”

Great! If only he’d had one prepared. Buggy’s thoughts went every which way—what did he want to know, what intel could he get out of Shanks?—before latching onto something totally useless, but also deeply important. “Did you know?” Realizing this was stupidly vague, he added, “About the kid?”

Shanks’ brow furrowed. “‘The kid?’”

“Ace.”

“Ah.”

“Did you know he was Roger’s?”

Shanks sighed and laid down. Staring at the ceiling, he said, “I… had my suspicions. When I met him, a couple years back, he told me a lot about himself. His dreams… where he was born… it was suggestive. And then there was his name.”

Buggy groaned. “Who names a kid after their sword?!”

Shanks chuckled. “Roger.”

Buggy sighed. “Roger.” He propped himself up on an elbow to look down at Shanks. “So he didn’t—no one told you?” Told you and not me?

Shanks shook his head. “Who would have? Who could have?”

Buggy shrugged. “I don’t know, doesn’t that haki stuff sometimes let you talk in each other’s heads or something?”

Shanks laughed. “No! It doesn’t work like that! How many times—”

“Yeah, yeah, I don’t know how it works, I don’t care how it works! I just—” Wanted to know if I’d been overlooked again. “—wanted to know if you knew.”

“No.” Shanks eyes softened, as if he’d heard Buggy’s real reason. He reached up to curl the end of Buggy’s ponytail around a finger and tug Buggy closer. “No, I think the only person Roger told was Garp.”

Buggy made a disgusted noise, which was not at all strangled by his reaction to Shanks’ hand in his hair. (Nope! That wasn’t provoking any kind of feeling in Buggy at all!) “Garp,” he muttered darkly. “What the hell was Roger thinking?!”

“Probably that Garp could keep his son safe.” In the dim light, Shanks’ eyes were hooded, unreadable.

“Oh yeah, he kept him real safe,” Buggy said dryly.

“As a kid, I mean.”

“What’s that matter? However safe his childhood was, he’s dead now,” Buggy snapped. “Our childhood was about as far from safe as possible, but at least we’re alive! At least we were cared for! That kid… the way he thought of himself…” Buggy buried his face in Shanks’ chest and sighed deeply. “It wasn’t right. One of us should’ve had him.”

Shanks’ hand came to rest on the back of Buggy’s neck. “Being a dad at sixteen would’ve been hard.”

“I guess,” Buggy grumbled. “But we would have managed.”

Shanks’ hand went stiff and still, fingers digging into Buggy’s neck a little. Buggy realized what he’d said and started to sweat. He’d been hoping to distract Shanks from his question, not bring them back around to that topic himself.

“Buggy. Please look at me.”

Buggy craned his neck back to look Shanks in the eye, resting the point of his chin on his chest in a pointed, hopefully painful move.

Shanks grimaced. “I’m sorry, Buggy, but I have to know. When did you ever want to be my first mate?” How did I miss that, his eyes seemed to ask.

It was about as hard to look at as Buggy had expected. He averted his eyes. “That last year with Roger? Maybe earlier, I don’t know.” Shanks started stroking his thumb across the spot where Buggy’s neck met his hairline. With that bit of contact soothing him, he managed to get the truth out. “I thought it was the only way I’d get to the last island.”

“…you wanted to go there together? That long ago?”

Buggy grimaced. That awed tone of voice told him Shanks had gotten the wrong idea. “More like I didn't think I could get there alone.”

“Oh.” After a moment’s pause, Shanks went back to stroking Buggy’s hair. Buggy relaxed, cheek sinking into Shanks’ chest. His heartbeat thudded away by Buggy’s ear in a slow, steady comfort. I’m here, I’m alive, I’m here… “Then I’m glad.”

“Hm?”

“I’m glad we didn’t stay together back then,” Shanks said, sounding almost surprised by his words. Buggy stared blankly into space. Was he hearing Shanks right? Shanks nodded, surer, and said, “Yeah, never thought I’d say that, but… I want you to believe in yourself more than I want you to be with me, Buggy.”

Buggy blinked a few times, fighting off a sharp stinging in his eyes.

Shanks tensed underneath him. “Buggy?”

Buggy shook his head, lifted himself up the barest amount, and pressed their lips together. Shanks made a soft, protesting noise, but Buggy would not be moved. He wouldn’t express these feelings in words, it couldn’t be done. This was the best he could do.

With a resigned little sigh, Shanks sank back into the bed, fingers threaded into Buggy’s hair, and let Buggy kiss him. Their faces came together and drifted apart so slowly, so many times, that Buggy would be hard-pressed to pinpoint the moment when they finally stopped, but stop they did, as sleep claimed them again.

When Buggy woke for the second time, early morning sunlight gleamed through the windows over Shanks’ bed. He was warm and well-rested, sated in almost every meaning of the word, and had no interest in getting up. And who could blame him? Shanks, still asleep, was lying on his back facing Buggy, his hand loosely curled around the back of Buggy’s neck, unconsciously keeping him close. Not that Buggy had made any effort to get away in his sleep; his head was on Shanks’ shoulder, his hand resting lightly against Shanks’ carotid, where he must have kept track of that pulse all night. I'm here, I'm alive, I'm here… Shanks’ face was so close that Buggy could see every small hair of the dark red mustache that had grown back in overnight, could feel the air flutter against his cheek every time he breathed. Which—well, the sour, alcoholic morning breath didn’t exactly fit the morning’s atmosphere, but Buggy had smelled worse.

Buggy drifted a little, enjoying the gentle rocking of a boat at sea, the human contact with someone who cared for him, eyes shuttered against the sun’s attempt to wake him fully. He didn’t want to get up until he had to. That motion of the boat meant they’d already left port. It wouldn’t be long before they met up with Buggy’s ship and crew, before this time together came to an end. Buggy intended to enjoy it while it lasted. Maybe if he laid here long enough, concentrating on his warm satisfaction, he’d be able to preserve it in his memory.

Outside, something fell to the deck with a loud crunch of wood on wood, the moment was ruined, and Buggy came to his senses.

He grimaced. What was he thinking? Preserving the memory of this sweet, soft morning? Ugh. Buggy rolled away from Shanks, his sappy thoughts snapping him to true wakefulness. What was he, some dockside lover pining away for a pirate he only saw once a decade? As if! If anyone was leaving someone behind here, it was Buggy! And he wasn’t gonna be some sappy excuse for a pirate either, staring wistfully at the horizon, thinking of someone he couldn’t be with—no way! Best to start as he meant to go on: by reminding himself of all the reasons he’d left in the first place, reasons why he would not miss Shanks at all.

He got up, not bothering to wake Shanks but not going quietly about his business either. His clothes were scattered all over the room—which was, he noticed with a touch of amusement and (ugh) affection, a lot less messy than it had been when he stopped by yesterday morning—and they’d gotten all mixed in with Shanks’ clothes, too. After a few false starts (they’d been right, Buggy could not fit in Shanks’ pants these days), Buggy made himself sartorially presentable. One last check in the mirror hanging next to Shanks’ closet, and—what the fuck.

Buggy gaped. He looked like something out of a horror story. His chin was streaked with red, his cheeks a ghastly pale gray where the powder hadn’t rubbed away entirely, just the faintest hint of the original crossbones showing through.

Good god, this makeup wasn’t just cheap, it was really cheaply made. The kind of stuff that would barely last an hour on an expressive face, let alone a day. Buggy put a finger to his cheekbone and watched with dismay as powder came off in a little cloud of dust. Not even his good setting spray would save this stuff. And the way the lip had smeared was—

A thought occurred to Buggy, and he spun around to stare at Shanks in horror. Marks that he hadn’t noticed last night were in the light of day very obvious lip prints in a deep red tint. On his neck, his chest, all the way down his chest in a very telling progression… oh no. No, no, no. This could not be borne.

Buggy dug around in his pockets and pulled out the makeup removing stick he’d gotten from Galdino. He’d thought he might need to touch up the makeup a bit in the morning, but not this much. Glancing between Shanks, the little wax stick, and his own increasingly panicked expression in the mirror, Buggy came up with a plan.

He finished making himself presentable— cleaning up the edges of his lip and removing almost all of the powder from his face, save the slashes of blue meant to draw attention to his eyes—and leapt onto the bed, jolting Shanks into consciousness.

“Shanks!” he hissed.

“Mm?”

“Shanks!” he hissed again. Shanks didn’t stir. “I’ll hit you,” he warned, and Shanks groaned piteously, hungover.

“Not into that so much,” he mumbled, “but if you insist…”

Buggy flushed, shoved that reaction down deep, and said, “Would you wake up already?! I have to go, and you need to promise not to leave your rooms until I’m back.”

“Hm, ’s that so?” Shanks cracked open one eye, finally, and frowned a little at the sight of Buggy, fully dressed. “Now who’s the one in a rush?”

“Didn’t I just say I’ll be back?” Buggy chided. He flicked a finger against Shanks’ chest. “You need makeup remover, and I assume you don’t keep any in here.”

“No.” Shanks blinked. He looked down at himself. “Why would I—oh.” He looked under the blanket. “Oh, wow.”

“You see the problem,” Buggy said dryly.

“I sure do,” Shanks said, voice wavering with disbelief and laughter. “I mean, wow, Buggy.”

“Shut up! It’s not my fault—those guys went and bought me new makeup yesterday!”

“That was sweet of them.”

“Yeah, that and three hundred berries will get you a cup of coffee. Stupid me, I assumed a couple dozen guys doing a day’s work could afford something a little better than this.” Buggy waggled the wax stick around; powder rained off it onto the bed. “This stick’s run its course, so I’m off to beg another one…” Buggy gave Shanks’ lipstick-marked chest a considering look. “Maybe two… off Galdino.”

“Bring him tea,” Shanks suggested. “Roux says he’s more agreeable after a cup of Earl Grey.” At Buggy’s look of surprise, Shanks smirked. “That guy’s not the only one keeping tabs on people around here, you know.”

Huh. Well, Buggy would have to rethink every conversation he’d had with or in the presence of Lucky Roux. Later. For now, a bribe of tea sounded like a better plan than the one he’d had (shouting until he got what he wanted). He headed for the door, but was stymied by a hand tangling in his sash. He glared over his shoulder at Shanks.

“What now?”

Shanks—Buggy blinked, not believing what he was seeing—pouted. “Can’t I get a kiss goodbye?”

Buggy blinked twice, not believing what he was hearing. “You must be joking.”

“You aren’t gonna kiss me again after you get this lipstick off me, not when that would undo all your hard work,” Shanks said, sounding very reasonable for a man with his bottom lip stuck out so far. “But I need a kiss. Just one more, please?”

If someone had told him even yesterday that Shanks would become such a baby the second he was shown the smallest bit of affection… “You know what? Fine.” A delighted expression bloomed on Shanks’ face as Buggy walked back to his side. Buggy smiled, laid a loud, wet kiss dead-center on his forehead, and pulled back to watch his face crumple.

The pouting was, if possible, worse this time. “Buggy, come on.” Shanks tugged at his sash again.

“I don’t know who told you this behavior was attractive, but they did you a real disservice,” Buggy said, splitting at the waist when it became clear Shanks would rather pull the sash loose than let go. “I’m going. I—” Actually, if he was flying anyway… “—do your windows open?”

Shanks dropped the pouty look—ugh, Buggy knew he’d been faking, what an ass—and glanced up. “Yeah, there’s a hinge somewhere…”

Buggy flew up and found a simple latch that let the windows swing out. Not great for hiding that the windows were open, but sensible for evacuation purposes. He flicked the latch and carefully swung open one window. Just big enough for him to get out, excellent.

“Don’t go anywhere.”

Shanks gave him a fond smile. “As you wish.”

Giving Shanks a wary look—he really couldn’t tell how many of these strange comments were jokes anymore—Buggy floated out the window and off toward the mess. Roux happily put together a mug of tea for Galdino when asked. He also pulled out a cup of drinking chocolate for Buggy, unprompted.

Now that Buggy knew to look for it, it was a little uncanny how well Roux had him figured out after all of two days’ acquaintance.

Well, however well Roux knew Buggy, Buggy didn’t know him at all; he couldn’t tell if the grin on Roux’s face was a smug, knowing one, or if that was just how he smiled. As Roux was adding the finishing touches to the tea—apparently Galdino liked it with lavender syrup and steamed milk, which was about as fancy as Buggy might have expected—Buggy thought, what the hell, the first mate already knows, and asked for something to eat, chef’s choice, and a bowl of that tomato-egg stuff Shanks liked, both to be picked up when Buggy was done bothering Galdino.

Roux’s grin didn’t change when he agreed, which answered that question.

When Galdino didn’t answer the door, Buggy went ahead and broke in. (Though was it really breaking in when it was supposed to be your room too?) He was dead to the world, those wax plugs in his ears again. Buggy started rapping his knuckles against the headboard, knowing the vibrations would get through even if normal sounds wouldn’t. After a minute, Galdino groaned, rolled over, and wrapped himself in a cocoon of wax.

Buggy paused. That was different.

“Did you get drunk last night or something?” he asked, speaking loudly to be heard through the cocoon. He couldn’t think of another reason Galdino would be this resistant to getting up.

The wax melted away to reveal a miserable, red-eyed man huddled in a ball on the bed. “Or something,” he agreed. Spotting the tea in Buggy’s hands, Galdino made a pathetic little sound and reached for it weakly, fingers stretching out but his arms not actually moving. “Those Red-Haired Pirates do not mess around when it comes to drinking games.”

“I could’ve told you that,” Buggy said, passing the tea along to Galdino, who drank slowly and gratefully. “Shanks could polish off a bottle of wine in an afternoon with no problem by the time we were thirteen, it’s only natural he’d find a crew with similar tolerances.”

Galdino groaned. “Yes, well, that would have been helpful information to have yesterday.” Draining the mug, he said, “What did you want, then?”

“Hey, not every interaction has to be transactional, you kn—” Buggy started to say. Galdino gave him a narrow-eyed look, and he gave up mid-word. “More of the makeup removing sticks, please. The shit those guys got me was cheap as hell, it got everywhere.”

“Everywhere?” Galdino’s eyebrow shot up. “Like… everywhere everywhere?”

“…and how’s that any of your business?” Buggy asked flatly, glaring daggers at him.

“You can’t blame a man for being curious,” Galdino said with an unrepentant little smirk.

“The hell I can’t, you flashy, nosy know-it-all!” Buggy grabbed the closest weapon—a pillow—and tried to smother Galdino with it. Galdino shrieked, shielding himself from the onslaught with wax armor. After a brief battle of wills, Buggy stopped trying to kill Galdino, and Galdino made him a full dozen makeup removing wax sticks, at which point Buggy attempted to smother him again, and half the sticks melted and bound Buggy’s hands up, and—anyway. Buggy got out of there eventually, with a reasonable number of wax sticks hidden away on his person.

As he left that room there was a tugging at his waist that had Buggy looking back, remembering too late that his waist wasn’t here, and grumbling to himself. Oh, was he taking too long for the poor Emperor of the Sea? Tough luck. If someone wanted to see Shanks that badly, they deserved to see him as he was, all lipstick-stained and sex-haired. So long as Buggy wasn’t in the room when it happened, it wouldn’t embarrass him. (Probably.)

The tugging continued, and Buggy rolled his eyes and let it happen, even when it changed from a tugging to a gentle pressure, what felt like Shanks’ whole hand pressed against his waist. What was Shanks thinking, touching Buggy like this? Was he just lying in bed, staring at Buggy’s disembodied legs? What a weirdo. Buggy smiled—then, remembering himself, frowned. What a creep.

At least the mess was empty. Buggy hadn’t checked a clock, but he suspected the night shift and first shift men had already come through, and those without an early schedule had yet to get up. It was super convenient, actually: no one but Roux would see him doing something sort of thoughtful for Shanks. Not that he deserved it, the way he was acting right now, making Buggy start to sweat with the effort of not reacting to the hand on his waist, the thumb rubbing little circles into his skin.

Roux had, somehow, just finished preparing the food, though Buggy had taken twice as long as he’d meant to with Galdino. He had everything packed up in little boxes, tied together with butcher’s twine, a paper cup that reeked of grassy green tea sitting on top of the stack.

“Let me know what you think of what I made for you today,” Roux said with a grin as Buggy went to leave. “I got a little experimental.”

“I’m sure it’ll be great,” Buggy said with a grin. “I almost think you could get me to eat tomatoes and like it.”

Roux laughed. “I still haven’t managed to get Shanks to eat blueberries, but I guess anything’s possible!”

That had Buggy laughing to himself the rest of the way back to Shanks’ rooms. He’d forgotten Shanks’ thing about blueberries! As a child, Buggy had accused Shanks of copying him, pretending to hate a blue food in revenge for Buggy legitimately hating a red one, but the truth was he’d always been a little squeamish about their yellow-green insides. Hadn’t liked the look of them, or so he’d said.

Oh, the pranks Buggy had pulled! Hiding a single overripe blueberry in all kinds of terrible places: the bottom of a bowl of porridge, on the seat of a chair, gently placed between the pages of a novel Shanks had bought at the last port town… man, he’d been such a menace as a kid. But Shanks had given as good as he got, so it never felt unfair to mess with him. As they’d gotten older, though, he’d stopped reacting. Either stopped getting mad, or stopped showing he was mad, Buggy had never been quite sure which. God, it had pissed him off. Shanks was only five months older than Buggy, where did he get off suddenly being so grown-up?

And now Shanks was more easygoing than ever! Buggy didn’t trust it; no one was that unruffled by him, especially not when he was being obnoxious on purpose. Even now that he’d seen some of what Shanks had been hiding, Buggy knew there was more to it. Behind those fond smiles and carefree laughter, there was a part of Shanks he didn’t trust Buggy with.

Which was fine! It was the most sensible thing he’d ever seen Shanks do, honestly—Buggy was a no-good, thieving, backstabbing pirate, he shouldn’t be trusted—but that he wouldn’t admit to it pissed Buggy off. To others, sure, let Shanks play the fool, whatever, but to Buggy? The least Shanks could do was be honest about lying to him.

As he was approaching the open window to Shanks’ room, a sudden jolt of sensation nearly made him yelp. Shanks had shifted his hand lower in a caress that sent a shiver up Buggy’s spine, and now he was rubbing his thumb across Buggy’s hipbone, just like yesterday in the park, which was… Buggy shivered again. Not something to be thinking about in public, damn him! He flew in the window, scowling, dropped the food on Shanks’ nightstand, scowling, and floated back up to shut the window with a scowl on his face.

“Buggy, hey!” Shanks was sitting on the edge of his bed. He’d found pants at some point, but not bothered with a shirt. He grinned. “You got us breakfast?”

“You think you’re so clever, don’t you?” Buggy said, turning that scowl on him.

“Hm?” Shanks said, an innocent look on his face. He was still stroking Buggy’s hip, like that four-inch curve of flesh and bone was the most fascinating thing he’d ever felt.

“I refuse to give you your stupid goodbye kiss, so you decide to rile me up while I can’t do anything to stop you, so when I get back I’ll be unable to help myself, huh? Is that it?”

Shanks blinked. He looked from Buggy’s lower half, standing between his legs, to Buggy’s upper half, floating above him. “Couldn’t you have just… stepped back, or kicked me, if you didn’t like it?”

Buggy opened his mouth to respond and found he didn’t have one. He could have done that. He just… hadn’t wanted to.

Shanks began to smile. “‘Unable to help yourself,’ you said?”

Buggy scowled. “Oh, you’re lucky you’re hot.” He shoved Shanks back and climbed on top of him, ignoring the laughter that burst out of Shanks as his head hit the mattress.

Later, very relaxed and searching for reasons to stay mad at Shanks, he was annoyed to learn that the boxes Roux had packed everything in were special heat-retaining boxes that could stay warm for upwards of half a day if left alone. He couldn’t even revenge himself on Shanks with a cold breakfast! He tried to eat resentfully, but the food was just too good to manage it: thin cuts of yesterday’s fancy ham, fried with syrup to a salty-sweet crisp and layered with fried eggs, cheese, and a sour spicy sauce on a hot dog bun. Roux really was some kind of miracle-worker; the bun wasn’t even soggy.

At least with a hand-held breakfast he could scrub aggressively at lipstick stains with his free hand while he ate. Shanks had to hunch over his nightstand to eat his breakfast (the tomato-egg stuff Buggy had requested, served over fried rice with what looked like spicy pickled cabbage and the fancy ham mixed in), and obviously he had no hand free to pitch in. He was happy to criticize Buggy’s technique, though, saying, “Won’t pressing hard enough to bruise defeat the purpose of cleaning me up?” as he leaned into the scrubbing motion.

This was, unfortunately, a reasonable point.

Muttering, “Well excuse me, I didn’t realize you bruised so easily,” under his breath, Buggy switched his focus to less easily bruised parts of Shanks. Just as he was getting started, there was a knock at Shanks’ door. The two of them shared a look—Buggy recently reclothed and fed, Shanks sitting there half-naked with his half-full bowl of food—and Buggy sighed. He split himself a couple ways, leaving one arm behind to scrub at the lipstick on Shanks‘ chest, floating his head and the rest of his torso to the other room.

“What?” he barked out, sounding so annoyed at being interrupted that (hopefully) no one would question why Buggy was in Shanks’ rooms at this hour.

“Oh, good,” said Benn Beckman. He walked in, terrifying Buggy, who’d been fairly certain that door was locked. “I didn’t have any idea where to check if you weren’t here,” he admitted, glancing past Buggy and making a face at the glimpse he caught of Shanks. “Boss, I think you’re gonna need to just give in and bathe to get all of that off,” he said, before returning his attentions to Buggy.

But Buggy was too distracted by this piece of information to let Beckman get back to his point. “There are bathing facilities on this ship?” he said, horrified. I could have gotten actually clean? Jabbing a thumb at Shanks, he said, “And he still looks like an unwashed rat half the time?!”

“Hey!” Shanks said, affronted.

Beckman coughed, poorly hiding a surprised laugh. “Well, I can’t speak to my captain’s personal hygiene decisions, but yes, we do have showers, and yes, we deliberately hid them from you.” Buggy gaped, aghast. “Our potable water reserves and salinity filters are decent, but we just don’t have the capacity to let hundreds of people use them over such a short span of time,” Beckman admitted. “It would have caused interpersonal conflict none of us wanted to deal with to only give some people access to the showers, especially if there appeared to be any signs of favoritism.” He gave Shanks a sideways look. “And there would have been.” Shanks shrugged affably, not denying it.

Buggy scowled, but nodded. This was a fair point. He'd been avoiding thinking about similar issues that would be sure to come up when he attempted to squeeze all of the Impel Down prisoners onto the Big Top. The space, the supplies, the food… he needed to find a proper home base, an island no one cared about in Paradise, where he could leave most of these guys while he figured out what the hell he was going to do with a crew that had more than quadrupled in size overnight. Multiple ships? (How?) A bigger ship? (How?) A permanent land-based population? (Who? Where?)

Buggy shook his head. Stupid to borrow problems from the future when he had plenty on his plate in the present. “What did you want with me, then?”

Beckman tilted his head towards the door. “Captain Buggy, if you don’t mind?”

Oh. Using his title, and wanting to talk without Shanks overhearing? This was serious. Buggy dropped the wax stick—Beckman was right, a shower with lye soap would work just as well on makeup this cheap—and reconnected his body, following Beckman into the hall. Crossing his arms over his chest, he said, “I’m listening.”

Beckman ran a hand across his face. In a ragged undertone, he said, “Our timeline is a lot tighter than we’re making it look. There’s a trade wind we need to catch tonight, and to do that we need you and yours off this ship within an hour of docking. And, well, you saw how slow-moving that bunch can be. Can you get those guys in some kind of order? God knows they aren’t going to listen to anyone but you.”

Buggy nearly laughed. Encouragement to boss around those guys some more? Was that all? With a grin, he gave Beckman a slap on the arm. “Tell you what,” he said, pushing Beckman back towards Shanks’ room, “you take care of your idiot in here, and I’ll take care of all of mine out there.”

Beckman sighed, relief making him look ten years younger. “Deal.”

(If a protesting sound came from within Shanks’ room, both of them chose to ignore it.)

#notfic #the near miss fics #one piece #shuggy #buggy #shanks #i gotta get these guys off the damn boat. /fatt reference #(but also literally. the fic can’t end until buggy leaves the boat. pls leave the boat buggy i’m begging you.#← says the person who keeps finding new reasons to keep him on the boat.)

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gretavangroupie · 1 year

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Burn (Chapter 3)

Word count: 6.6k+

Pairing: Sam Kiszka x Female Reader

Warnings: 18+ as always, language, drinking, smut, fluff.

SAM POV

The door slammed shut behind her so loud, that the windows rattled and you are pretty sure you felt your heart crack from the sheer force.

How did you manage to fuck this up again?

You find yourself rushing to the door to go after her, but stop yourself as you see her stepping into the Uber. You watch her from the window as she drives away, and with her a piece of something you’ve been chasing after for years. Never quite able to put your finger on it, but now finally found. Gone just as quickly. Throwing the paper cup of coffee into the kitchen sink, you hover over it staring into the stainless, a blurry image of yourself reflecting back through the puddles of brown liquid.

“My Sammy…”

You run your hands through your hair and turn on the sink, washing away the evidence of your outburst. You look up at the plants on the window sill, and you see a few brown leaves. As you gently pluck them away as you hear the bedroom door open.

“Did you tell her? Is she gone?” Morgan asks.

A pang of resentment washes through your chest as you turn to face her.

“You heard the door slam Morgan, don't ask questions you already know the answer to. Also, what the hell was that little show you just put on? You have never made such a scene since we agreed to this, and I know if the roles were reversed you would be pissed at me. So what the fuck?” you ask.

She rolls her eyes and turns on her heels, walking over and plopping herself down on the couch, just staring at you with a condescending glare. You join her on the opposite side of the couch.

“Sam, do you think I’m stupid? Do you think that I didn’t know this was going to happen? I knew it was going to happen since the day you told me you saw her on the plane. You aren't very good at keeping your emotions to yourself. That night at the bar? You two were all over each other…you thought I couldn’t see. So when you told me you had a work meeting on a Friday night, I knew it had to be her. Who has a meeting at a bar at 8pm?”

You shoot her an annoyed, questioning look before realizing what she was getting at.

“Yeah, you forgot to turn your location off, Sammy boy…” she says, putting emphasis on her last words.

“DON’T ” you snap at her, cutting her off as she rolls her eyes again. She knows better.

“I had my suspicions and a key, so why not find out for myself?” she says, tapping her finger on her chin. “Low and behold, I’m right. Again.” she finishes.

“This whole arrangement was YOUR idea, Morgan. I didn’t break any rules.” you call out to her.

“This arrangement was for random one time hook ups, Sam. Not for a hall pass with your highschool sweetheart.” she replies.

“Oh fuck that, we never laid out specfics.” you know you got her when she cuts her eyes and turns her attention to her phone.

“You didn’t have to be such a bitch to her, you know.” you add.

“Really, Sam? Are you sure about that? Is that why you sent her out of here in that pink sweater? The one you claim is your favorite? The one you never let me wear?” she says snidely.

You look past her to the kitchen, ignoring her insinuation.

“How exactly do you think you’re going to get that back from her? Not by contacting her, right? Because that would break the rules…” she says, with a sneering tone.

“You’re being dramatic.” you say, playing it off, knowing that she is exactly dead on the money.

“No, I’m not. She needed to know her place, and I think she now knows, it’s nowhere near here. It was one time, Sam. That’s the rule. She needed to know.” she says finally.

You twirl the tassel on the throw pillow in your hands, looking over to Rose laying at your feet. She looks up at you with pleading eyes. You smile at her, and stand up.

“I’m taking Rose out, I have some errands to run. You can come with me or go home. Your choice.” and with that you walk into the bathroom, flicking the shower handle on, and stepping inside the steamy glass. Your anger is bubbling in your chest at how Morgan is acting and you question if any of this is even worth it anymore. You already know your feelings for her are nothing like what you felt last night.

As you massage the soapy suds into your hair, you let your mind wander back to last night.

Images of her eyes looking up at you, as she unbuckled your belt. Her long eyelashes fluttering as she gripped you in her hand.

Your hand wanders down to your dick, that is now screaming for attention, and you find yourself mimicking the motions of her hand that are replaying in your mind.

Her perfect pink lips wrapped so delicately over your length, her velvet tongue dragging slowly over you. The way your tip grazed the back of her throat. The groan of pleasure coming from her full mouth.

Your hand picks up its pace as you continue to stroke yourself more furiously.

“Fuck me, Sam…”

Your jaw hangs slack as you can almost imagine the sensation of how tight she was around you, poorly imitated in the grip of your hand now. As your breathing starts to falter, you pull from your most prized memories to get you over that finish line.

“Sammy…Sammy, fuck….”

The way her face looked as she reached her release around you, your name falling from her lips.

With one more pull you are groaning as your cum shoots into your fist as you continue to stroke your pulsing length, releasing every drop, wishing it was into her.

As you struggle to catch your breath you steady yourself on the shower wall and wonder if this will be the only way you'll be able to have her again. In your memories.

You begin to rewash your body, letting the suds wash down your legs and feet. Looking down to your legs, your mind flashes back to her legs being tangled with yours just a few short hours ago.

Sometime around 4am you woke up from the nagging in your bladder. She was out like a light next to you, and you found yourself just looking for her as you forced your eyes open. When you saw her next to you, you studied every inch of her, memorizing every curve. Every freckle you could make out in the dim light. She looked exactly like you remembered, though older now, like she had been through her share of struggles and triumphs. You wondered what her life has been like since you knew her. You wonder what would have happened if you never left her at Prom that night. How things may have played out between the two of you if you had told her how you felt. If a relationship with her would have eventually started. Would it have made it past high school? College? Would you still be with her now?

You were caught off guard when she mentioned the memory of that day in the car together, because you do remember it. You remember it for one specific reason, though you have buried it into the deepest folds of your brain, you remember. It was the day you realized you had feelings for her.

You had all spent the entire day swimming at the lake, hanging out together. Her, Lauren, you, and Danny, enjoying the coolness of the water on a hot summer day. Maybe it was your teenage hormones but you left the lake that day with the image of her sun kissed body floating endlessly through your brain. The way her bikini sat on her hips. The delicate blue string tied around the back of her neck in a bow. On the way home the setting sun was shining in on her and Lauren in the back seat they danced and sang to Ke$ha. The sun illuminated the side of her face, a beautiful peachy glow cast onto her skin; The wind from the rolled down windows blowing their hair around and smiles glued to their faces. You turned around to watch them and as her eyes met yours, they lingered for half a second longer than normal. There was something there and that's when you felt it the first time.

You knew right then you wanted her, but you couldn’t bear the thought of ruining the friendship you shared. The thought of no more days like that scared you into staying quiet. You kept and harbored those feelings for her, wondering if she felt the same, but denying anything between the two of you.

So when Prom came around and Lauren and Danny decided to go together, you felt it was only right to ask her. No one else had, and the thought of her going alone crushed you. You wanted to go with her, more than anyone, but you were scared. Scared that you might tell her how you felt, and scared that it could ruin your friendship. You didn’t even know if she liked you that way. No one knew you felt that way about her, and you didn’t want them to. Not even Danny. But you couldn’t stand the thought of her being alone at Prom, so you asked her and she accepted.

As the night came, the more you danced with her and talked with her the deeper those feelings for her began to root. When Danny pulled you aside in the bathroom and asked you what was going on between you two, you lied. You told him you felt sorry for her and that you didn't want her to go alone. But he didn't believe you. You were so sure he could see right through you. So you did the only thing you could think of that would drive the point home at 18 years old. You left her there and you took someone else home that night. Someone you couldn’t even remember the name of today.

But she remembered, right there in seat 14B. So when she told you on the plane that she had feelings for you back then, you were shocked. You thought at the time, maybe she might have but you never really knew for sure because you never talked to her after that night. You had effectively destroyed the friendship you tried to protect.

She didn't talk to you either. You didn't know you broke her heart. You didn’t know that she liked you that way, until Lauren told Danny and Danny told you. But by then it was too late. The band was finally taking off, you were graduating soon, and things in your life were finally starting to fall into place. But she was still there. Rooted into every fiber of your heart. Ever since that day at the lake. Ever since that one glance in the car. Over time it felt as if those roots disappeared one by one. That is, until you stepped into seat 14A and made conversation with an all too familiar stranger, whose smile lit you on fire the same way it did all those years ago.

So last night as you looked at her, laying in your bed, in your favorite t-shirt, you thought back on how stupid you were then. How you wished you had just told her how you felt. How you let her believe that she wasn’t the person you wanted to take home on Prom night. Or any night for that matter.

She was still there, still rooted into your heart, just gone dormant for all these years. You kicked yourself, because now you were with someone else. Someone who had allowed the opportunity of that moment with her. But someone who could never hold a candle to how you felt about the girl laying next to you. The one you’ve thought about since you were an eighteen year old nobody, playing your bass in your parents garage. The only girl you’d ever let call you Sammy. You have always been hers, whether she knew it or not.

As she rolled over closer to you, she wrapped her arm around your chest. You smoothed the hair away from her face and suddenly found that your bladder didn’t seem so important after all. You wanted to tell her how you felt, and you would in the morning. But the morning came quickly, and bearing different ideas.

You shake your head to clear the thoughts, turning off the shower and stepping out. You aren’t sure how long you were lost in that trance but it had to be a while. You could hear Rose scratching at the bathroom door. Drying yourself off you thought about how you were unprepared to face the reality of your situation. The reality being that you let her slip through your fingers again, and you didn’t know if you could bring her back. The other part of the problem being the 5 foot 4 brunette sitting on your living room couch.

You walk into your bedroom and get dressed, Rose walking into the room to meet you.

“I know, me too.” you say as she throws herself onto the floor with a huff. “Let's go, we’re gonna go run some errands.”

You pull your phone out of your pocket and stare at her contact for a minute, trying to convince yourself not to text her, but ultimately you do.

You: Can we please talk?

You slide the phone back into your pocket before walking down the hallway, to find Morgan still sitting on the couch.

“Are you staying or going?” you ask her.

“I’ll come with you.” she replies.

“Alright, well let’s go.” you say, attaching Rose’s leash to her harness and stepping towards the door.

You spend most of the afternoon running to various shops and stores picking up items you are running low on, grabbing coffee and enjoying the Farmers Market. You have a nagging feeling in the back of your head that has had you checking your phone for a reply multiple times today, but every time you’re met with nothing. As you pull into the last store, you let Morgan and Rose hang out in the car.

“I’m just going to run inside and grab what I need real quick. Do you need anything?” you ask.

She shakes her head no and you step into the building. You pull your phone from your pocket and see that the message has been read for over 3 hours now, and still no response. You have lost your self control and find yourself hitting the little green phone button next to her name.

Placing the phone to your ear you hear the call ring out, one, two, three times before you get her voicemail.

Fuck!

You: Please call me, I really want to explain. I promise it will make sense if you just let me explain.

Read.

Knowing that she is actively ignoring you almost makes it worse. You grab the bottle of Advil you came in for, and head to the register to checkout. As you get back into the car you sigh and pull away from the parking lot.

“What’s wrong, you’ve been in a mood all day.” Morgan asks.

“Nothing is wrong, just have a headache.” You say holding up the bottle of Advil.

Lie. Strike Two.

“Good, I thought you were still hung up on that girl.” she says, reassuring herself.

If you only knew…

She reaches out to grab your hand and laces her fingers with yours. It feels so wrong. It feels alien. You pull into the parking lot of a restaurant to pick up your to-go order and run in again with your wallet, leaving Morgan and Rose in the car to wait.

As you approach the counter, they tell you it’s going to be another few minutes so you sit on the bench and wait. You instinctively reach for your phone, but realize you must have left it in the car.

MORGAN POV

Oops, looks like he left his phone...

You pick it up out of the seat and go to put it in the console, but curiosity gets the best of you. You bite your lip and slide your thumb up the screen opening up the device.

Looking up to make sure he isn’t walking out, you check his calls. You have a sneaking suspicion he is still in contact with that girl.

Yep. There she is…

What the hell… why does he even care about her… what was so great about her… whatever.

You close out of the phone log and switch to his texts, seeing Jake, Daniel, and there she is again. You click on her name and see that he has just texted her 15 minutes ago, and multiple times before that, for weeks.

Whatever.

To be honest, you kind of expected this. You know he has been in a pissy mood all day but he will never admit why. That's why you wanted to come with him today, to see if he would crack.

Honestly, your relationship with Sam has lasted longer than you expected. When you started to get bored you suggested an open relationship and he went for it. You told him that you wanted him to be able to enjoy his tour when in reality you had been seeing others on the side for a while. You were surprised when he agreed without argument, but didn’t question it. It gave you both the freedom you wanted. You do care about him as a person and boyfriend but something was missing from the relationship and maybe it always has been.

When it all started that night at the bar you knew exactly who he was. He was lonely and looking for someone, and you were looking for your ticket to the career you always wanted. You had hoped that things would progress into a relationship and they did. You knew dating someone like him could help you get where you wanted to be, and like magic you landed your job with Lava. You knew he pulled some strings for you, so you stuck around. You kept things casual with him, while wearing the girlfriend badge. He made your life easy, granting you access to things you wouldn’t be able to attain without him. But as you spent more time with him getting to know him you did begin to care about him and enjoy his company. So seeing him want someone else hurts but you always knew this wasn’t forever.

When you saw the two of them at the bar that night, you could see that fire in his eyes that he once had with you. You knew this would happen. That he was drawn to her. You said nothing, waiting to see if your hunch was right. When he said he had a meeting last night, you knew. It had to be her.

Locking the phone and tucking it between your legs, you sat and waited. Ready to press him further to see if he would snap. You want him to admit it.

You sit back in the seat and wait.

SAM POV

As you slide into the driver's seat you check the console for your phone but you don't see it. You open the center console and it's not there either. You lift up wondering if it fell out of your pocket but it's not there.

“What the hell?” you mutter looking all around.

“Looking for this?” Morgan asks, holding it up in her hand, with a sneering tone.

You grab it out of her hands and shove it into your pocket.

“So this little love affair has been going on for weeks, huh? Like since the day you saw her on that plane?” she asks condescendingly.

“What?” you ask.

“You have been texting her for weeks… You texted her 20 minutes ago.” she says.

“You went through my phone?” you say.

She shrugs dismissively, “What exactly are you going to explain, Sam? What wasn’t clear this morning?”

“You have got to be kidding me! Why would you do that!? This is a complete invasion of my privacy! You had no reason to believe that I was doing anything against our rules, and yet you decided to break my trust and go through my texts? This is low, even for you Morgan.” you yell, accelerating the car faster than you should.

“But you did break the rules Sam!” she yells back. “That was it. That was the last time. Nod if you agree.”

You clench your jaw and nod, not wanting to even look at her. You hate that she is right. You hate that you are caught. But honestly, you don't even really care anymore.

Now she knows.

The rest of the night is uneventful and you end up letting Morgan spend the night so as to not raise any further suspicion. You do feel bad that you broke the rules, but it just felt like something worth breaking the rules over, and if presented with the opportunity, you would probably do it again. Rules be damned. Morgan be damned.

By the morning she is gone to get ready for work and you awake alone in your bed. You stumble out of bed and get dressed, seeing that t-shirt laying on the floor by the window. You pick it up and throw it into your laundry basket, prompting you to reach for your phone, just to check and see if she had by some miracle replied. Nothing.

I’ll be damned if I let her get away again without so much as an explanation.

You hit the phone button and let the dial tone ring out, before getting her voicemail again, so you send her another text.

You: Can I please talk to you? I need to explain and then I will leave you alone if that's what you want.

Error: Message could not be delivered.

What?

She blocked me.

You slam your phone down onto the bed and storm off into the kitchen. You let Rose outside and slam that door too. You slam the cabinet shut, the coffee pot closed and the mug down onto the island. You are pissed. You have ruined your last shot. The shot you never thought you’d get to take, again.

As you wait for your coffee to brew you stand and think.

How can I make this right? How can I get her back?

But then, it comes to you.

HER POV

Your phone vibrates across your coffee table, dancing along as you stare at it. You know who it is, and you know what he wants. But what you want is to respect the woman he’s in a relationship with and the rules they have set with each other. You know what happened with Sam was not just a casual hookup. You know that, or else he wouldn’t be begging for you to talk to him. He would forget about you, just like the rest who likely came before you. Shoving your feelings aside, you ignore the call.

The phone stops vibrating and you pick it up, just as it vibrates again.

Sammy K: Can I please talk to you? I need to explain and then I will leave you alone if that's what you want.

That’s when you decide to block his number. No matter how bad it hurts. You know that if you answer him and let him talk to you and explain, that you will fall right back into his arms. You will be the other woman. You will be responsible for hurting someone else. You deserve more than to be someone's secret.

You scroll to his contact and hit block, wishing it would also block the feelings radiating inside your chest. But it doesn’t. Sadly there is no button for that.

The next several days are filled with work, cheap bottles of wine and romantic comedies. You have tried to push the thoughts of him out of your head, but you can’t. Your mind keeps racing back to that tender moment you shared just a week ago. When he told you, how even after all these years, you are the only one who can call him Sammy. How you make him feel normal in the hustle and bustle of his busy life. That feels too real for you. It feels too, right. You want that. But not in these circumstances.

Polishing off the last of the Merlot, you slide the glass onto the coffee table, as your phone buzzes. Looking down at the screen you see a familiar name.

Jake?

Jakey K: Free for lunch tomorrow? Would love to catch up.

What in the world? Why is Jake texting you to have lunch…

You: Are you sure you picked the right contact? Lol…

Jakey K: Yeah, if you don’t want to, that’s okay too.

You: No, I do. I have my lunch hour from 12-1.

Jakey K: Tomorrow at 12:15 at Bone’s?

You: Sure, okay. See you then!

Well this is odd. I mean, you did always hang out all together… I guess it’s not so strange, and he did say ‘don't be a stranger’ that day at the airport.

As you fall asleep tonight, you are happy that you have something to look forward to tomorrow. It will be nice to spend your lunch hour outside your office. Thinking about what to wear, you drift off to sleep.

The clock is ticking closer and closer to 12:00. It’s a 5 minute drive from your office to the restaurant Jake picked, and you are actually really excited to see him. You decided on a dress today, and you are feeling happy and confident with your appearance. You busy yourself for another few minutes before you are collecting your things and walking out the door. As you get into your car you reapply your lipstick and set off to the restaurant.

You park your car and get out, and as you open the front door you are greeted by the hostess and a familiar looking face in a black hat.

“Hi, Jake.” You say with a smile.

“Hello, there.” he says with a soft smile. He looks to the hostess and motions for two and she escorts you to a table. You both sit down and settle yourselves as he passes you the drink menu.

Maybe one drink would be ok… it will probably wear off before you have to go back…

“What do you think, does anything look appealing?” he asks.

You continue to read the menu, biting your lip as you decide. “Yeah I think I can probably have one, if I drink it fast.” you both laugh.

The waitress comes and takes your drink order and you give her the menus.

“So how have you been, just wanted to catch up. Like to talk to old friends.” he says rubbing his thumb over his chin.

“Yeah, it’s really nice of you to reach out! I have been great. I have a great job, and I love Nashville. There is always something to do or a show to see.” you smile. “How have you been? What’s going on in your life?” you ask.

“Ahhh, you know just traveling, touring, living my life. My girlfriend just moved in with me, things are getting more settled down, you know?” he asks.

You smile, remembering the 19 year old guy playing his guitar far too loudly in the garage and how far he has come. He always said he would be famous, and sure enough.

“That’s amazing, I am so happy for you Jake.” you smile. “I would love to meet her if you guys ever decide to go out one night.”

“Oh she would love that, she loves meeting new people.” he says, but is interrupted by the waitress asking for our food order.

Once you place your order, you continue to chat casually sipping at your margarita, and enjoying the conversation.

Jake pulls his phone out of his pocket, “I’m sorry, excuse me.” he says standing up and walking away.

You swirl your straw around in your glass, the pale green liquid growing clearer as the ice melts. Your tongue darts out to lick the salt on the rim as you take another sip through the tiny black straw. Your eyes flick up and out of the corner of your eye you see Jake’s hat near the front door.

What is he doing?

Who is he talking to?

Leaning over to peer out of the booth your eyes find him again, but this time you can see who he is talking to you and you feel your face heating and turning red.

Just as you are about to collect your things and storm out, your waitress arrives with your food.

“Here you are, your steak salad. Can I get you anything else? Another drink maybe?” she asks.

You contemplate just leaving all together, but you know this is an expensive lunch, and it looks so good. You decide that if you are about to sit here and suffer through this set up, you are going to need another drink.

“Sure, I will do one more Margarita, thank you.” you say politely.

Throwing back the rest of your watered down margarita, you see Sam approaching the table with Jake in tow.

Sam slides into the booth with sorrowful eyes, and you immediately look away, fully intending on ignoring him as you eat your lunch.

“So sorry to do this, but I have to run. Luckily, Sam can keep you company.” Jake says with a smirk and a pat on the shoulder, and with that he is a blurry shadow walking away.

That asshole. This was the plan the whole time.

You cut your eyes back to Sam who is still sitting there, staring at you, waiting for you to say something. Instead you pick up your fork and knife and begin to eat. The waitress drops off your drink and you tell her thank you and smile at her, and do every single thing that you can to make sure the message is very clear that you are ignoring him. After a few more minutes he finally cracks.

“Can you please just say something!” he begs.

You look up at him slowly and dramatically. “Yeah, I can. Where should I start? Should I start with you failing to mention that what happened between us was only going to be a one time thing? Or should I start with you calling and texting me incessantly over the past week to the point where I had to block your number? Or this little setup you planned? Or the fact that you're even seeing me right now is breaking your little rules?”

He throws his head back into the seat. “You didn’t give me a chance to explain. I tried to call you, I tried to text you. You blocked me, and you’re entitled to that, but you have to hear my side of things. Please. This was the only way.” he says pleading.

“The only way was to drag your poor brother into this? Did you tell him? Did you tell him what happened?” you ask.

“Yeah, he knows. It’s the only way I could get him to agree to it.” he says defeatedly.

“Oh my god, Sam… this is…beyond…” you say, shocked, shaking your head.

“Can I please explain? After I tell you everything, if you want me to leave and never speak to you again, I will do it. I’ll respect that, but you have to know my side of things.” he says.

You pick at your salad a little bit, before you look up to him. “Okay, go ahead.” you say begrudgingly.

“I am so sorry that I didn’t tell you the details of mine and Morgan’s relationship. I should have been completely up front with you about it. The rules are that one night stands are allowed, but no contact after, and it can never happen again. Right? You know that part. The part that I didn’t tell you is that about five minutes after meeting you at the bar that night, I threw all the rules out the window. I knew this would never just be one time for me. It couldn’t.” he says nervously.

“You asked me that night if I remembered that day in the car… I do remember. You know why I remember it? Because that day we all went to the lake… I realized that I liked you. Not like a friend, either. I never stopped liking you. When I asked you to Prom? I had no question in my mind that I wanted to take you. You were my first choice. But I was so scared of ruining the friendship we all had. I couldn’t stand the idea of something happening and us losing everything. So I kept it to myself and when Danny asked me about it, I lied to him. I was nervous that he could tell so I left with that random girl that night. I had no idea that you liked me back. I was shattered for weeks when I found out that you cried the entire way home. Danny gave me shit for weeks. I gave myself shit.” he says, with hurting eyes.

“We stopped talking and I realized I ruined everything. It was too late, I blew it. I would search you every now and then, see how you were doing. But I knew I lost my chance. Until I saw you on the plane that day. I knew right that second that I had to know you again. I had to know this version of you. Danny knew. Even Jake… Josh. But there was Morgan. She threw a wrench into everything.” He says with a sigh, running his hands through his hair.

“Things with her have been rocky at best, I feel like this arrangement we made was a means to an end. Then you came along. She’s been reading my texts and telling me that I need to stop talking to you, and the only thing I feel for her at this point is resentment. That’s part of the reason I had to set this up through Jake. I didn’t want her to show up here. I know that all of this doesn’t change anything that happened and I will never be able to tell you how sorry I am. You deserve better than what I gave you but you had to know. It was never one time for me. It never has been. It never will be.” He says, reaching his hand out to yours.

Your heart aches at his confession.

Has he really felt like this all this time?

You want to give in, you want to tell him you feel the same, and you always have. You want to run back into his arms. But you can’t. You can’t let him off this easily.

“So you mean to tell me, that instead of just telling me how you felt back then, you lied and kept it secret and ended up hurting me anyways? Ruining the friendship that you were trying to protect? How did that workout for us, Sam? How would it be any different now? You’re doing the exact same thing now! How am I supposed to trust you? Have you learned anything since then?!” you ask.

“I know, it's… it’s a mess and it's all my fault. I was so stupid then, I guess I’m still stupid, now. But I haven’t been able to get you out of my head. All day everyday, you’re there. Just like back then. I know this is a lot, and I know you probably don’t feel the same way anymore. But you just had to know. It’s always been you.” he finishes.

Your eyes lock with his, and you can feel how badly he wants you to understand. To forgive him. To be with him.

“Sam…I think you know how I feel about you. If you’re serious, you will go and figure things out with Morgan. Figure out what you really want.” you say pulling your phone from your purse.

You scroll to his contact and unblock his number. “There, you aren’t blocked anymore. Figure out what you want. When you’re ready, you can call me and let me know what you’ve decided. Either way. Until then…” you trail off.

Please make the right choice Sammy...

SAM POV

As she flashes you the screen of her phone, your heart leaps. You see that you are still Sammy in her phone. After all these years, you're still Sammy.

You reach your hand out for hers, and she lets you grab it.

Maybe there is hope after all…

You want this with her. You want everything with her.

You breathe a deep sigh of relief, “Thank you...I swear I’m not going to fuck this up again.”

She squeezes your hand, “I really hope so Sam.”

You nod your head in agreement. The waitress comes with the check and you quickly slide her your card.

“Sam!” she scoffs.

“It is the least I could do. I mean, I did set you up anyways.” you smirk.

“Yeah, don’t think you’re off the hook for that either.” she says with a grin.

You laugh, as she smiles at you. “I’m going to make this right. I promise.” you say in a more serious tone.

She nods and grabs her purse, “I have to get back to work. I am already late.” she says.

“Oh, go. I’m sorry I kept you.” you say.

“I’m not.” she says with a soft smile. She stands and throws her purse over her shoulder, giving you a soft kiss on the cheek and disappearing down the aisle.

Your body feels like it is on fire after her small display of affection. The waitress returns with your card and you quickly sign your name and head out to your car.

Once you’re inside you turn off do not disturb and see that you have a whole slew of messages and phone calls.

Jake: How did it go?

Morgan: Why are you on DND, call me.

Morgan: Hello?

Missed Call: Morgan

Fuck...

You text Jake back and tell him that it has gone as good as you’d hoped and thanking him for his help.

But now you have to call Morgan. You select her contact and hit the phone icon, listening to it ring.

“Hello?” she answers.

“Hey.” you say.

“What’s going on? I saw you put ‘do not disturb’ on. You never turn that on.” she asks.

“I was just having a meeting. What are you doing?” you ask.

“Nothing, I just got home. Why, what’s up?” she asks.

“Can I come over?” you say.

“Aww, yeah. You can, how long until you’ll be here?” she asks.

“Maybe 10 minutes?” you reply.

“Okay, I will see you soon.” she says.

“Sounds good.” you say hanging up, swallowing heavily.

A few minutes later as you pull into her driveway you put your car in park and get out, making your way to her door.

She opens the door just before you knock, and wraps her arms around your neck. As you wrap your arms around her you sigh, returning the hug that feels so foreign to you now.

You care for her, but now you are torn on what is right and wrong. You have feelings for both girls. You have so much history with both of them. They both know you, just in different stages of life. You want them both.

Stepping into her house you push the hair from your face and shut the door behind you.

Now, being forced to make a decision between the two, you wonder if you really have to.

Or if you will.

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lookforthelig-ht · 1 year

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The Archer (chapter 1)

pairing: joel miller x fem!afab!reader. Enemies to Lovers. Slow Burn.

summary: set in Jackson post TLOU finale. It was clear they hated each other even if they tried to say it wasn’t that.

rating: 18+ (no minors please)

word count: 2.2k

warnings etc: angst, smut (eventually in the series), age gap (joel is 56 reader is 25), NO USE OF Y/N.Anxiety. Mentions of show canon violence.

“I’ve been the archer, I’ve been the prey. All of my enemies started out friends”

inspo songs

She felt the pounding in her chest. Her heart was beating so fast, she thought it was going to jump out. She took deep breath as her hands went near her face as she held her bow. Her hair brushed against her shoulders as she stared down at the deer near the watch tower in Jackson. She was so close to let go of the arrow when the sound of the door creaking behind her made her jump and in return, made her lost sight of the possible prey.

“Sorry, kid, didn’t mean to scare ya” Joel’s voice approached her. He sat down at the sit next to window where she was standing. She rolled her eyes at the statement.

“You didn’t scare me and I’ve told you, I’m no kid” she insisted. That nickname made her boil. It was nothing personal against the man but she hated how small he made her feel. She understood he was Tommy’s brother but ever since he arrived with Ellie, the entire town seemed to bend the rules for him even if they insisted it wasn’t like that.

It started with the night watch. For safety reasons the turns have been reduced to two people per watch. One to attack possible enemies from the tower and the other one to notify the others. It sounded logical but before there were four people per watch. The whole “pair per watch” was Joel’s idea.

The pairs were assigned depending on skill and she got the golden ticket of doing night watch with the man every three days. The first started to bicker when he noticed she didn’t know how to handle a gun but seemed to be a perfect shot with a bow and arrow.

“Why do you fucking care? I’ve been using this ever since arriving here and no one fucking cared” she cried out on their first argument. He just chuckled in a mocking tone.

“C’mon kid, you’re get yourself killed before you have a chance at using that against an infected or worse” was his only argument.

She spent that entire night sitting down facing the window with her back to him. Hiding the tears rolling down her eyes. Ever since that first fight, the night he made her feel worthless and stupid, she barely speaks to the man. The problem was that he was the brother of her best friend’s husband. And it was either deal with him or change watch schedules and deal with her ex-boyfriend. It was sort of an “worst of two evils” situation and she rather deal with a Miller than with a douche who has ammunition to annoy her.

That night was uneventful as it was most of the times when the weather starts to get warmer. A light breeze entered through the window as they both stared down on the forest surrounding the commune with weapons in hand.

“Sorry…I…I know you wanted to catch that deer” Joel spoke, breaking off the awkward silence between them. It would always be like this. He would do something to annoy her, a few hours would go by and then he would apologize.

“It’s fine” she groaned. Again, she didn’t hate him, she was just annoyed. Her temper was known in the town as a difficult one. Hell. People wondered how she got by before coming into town without getting herself killed with that attitude. On the other hand, she made herself useful. Even if they had plenty of supplies, she hunted for food and would always bring it down to the dining hall. Even if her weapon of choice wasn’t practical, she made it work.

“Ya know, Ellie is dying for you to teach her how to use it, she hasn’t told you anything because of me” Joel started, was he actually trying to make a conversation?

The man’s eyes were trying to stare at hers but she just kept looking out the windows instead. She felt his stare. She has memorized every worry line on his forehead, every crinkle around his eyes, how his hair was tussled and disheveled most of the time with the hints of grey hairs coming out. The broadness of his shoulders, how he towered over even though she wouldn’t consider herself a short person, she definitely felt like one next to him.

She just silently nodded at the statement.

Determined to finish the patrol without another confrontation which would have the entire town talking. Something she was actively trying to avoid since Maria warned her that another argument would get her in trouble. She sighted at that thought. How she kept being treated as a child but remembering she was acting like one. Kicking and screaming when things didn’t went her way. Throwing a fit when being questioned about any of her, rather rash, decisions.

“I-I can. If you want, of course” she said between her teeth. She has only shared a few moments with Ellie but she was different than Joel.

She was talkative and rather expressive. She thought of herself when being with the teen. The impulsiveness, the talking back, her choice of words even. Maybe it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world to teach her. She turned her head from the window to look at Joel for the first time since the patrol started a few hours ago.

“I don’t know, kid, I think I rather her be focused on normal stuff, ya know?” she rolled her eyes again. She hated being called “kid” even if it was in an endearing nickname, she knew it wasn’t like that. It came from a place of condescendence. It was establishing a limit. He was a grown up and she was not.

“If you call me kid again, I swear to God I will shove an arrow up in your ass” she spat back before going back to her original position. Face looking outside and ignoring the presence of a man. So much for trying to be nice, she thought.

He chuckled at the statement. He wasn’t really fond of her either. He found her immature, careless and petulant. In his own words she was a

A child.

At first, he didn’t get what was her deal. Every opinion he had, she seemed to think the opposite of it. He could say the sky was blue and she would go on about how it’s actually red. It was getting to a point where he would just shut up and apologize. In his head it didn’t make sense to argue with her because in her eyes, he was always going to be wrong.

Every time they would find themselves locked up in the tower, he would notice how her eyes had a spark whenever she felt passion towards a topic in general. They had a certain shine that made it impossible for him to take his off and her lips. He could go on about her lips. How plumped they seemed and the way they curved when smiling when she’s right. How she seems to slightly open them when shooting with her bow and arrow.

That was another thing that caught his attention, how she insisted on just using that instead of a gun. He even remembers how their first argument was about that and ever since that night she always stays with her back to him to avoid conversation. And even when they do talk, is a power struggle on who’s right and wrong.

Again, they never would admit how much they actually disliked the other even if it was obvious, but they would also never admit how they have each other’s quirks memorized. She would insist on Joel to stop calling her kid, but she knew he wouldn’t. Even under a threat. Because he also knew she wouldn’t actively try to hurt him. Not because she was afraid. On the contrary he knew if one day he winded her up enough, she would honor her own words and shove the arrow up his ass, but because she was on thin ice.

Tommy slipped up a few days ago and let Joel know that if they had another discussion strong enough to stir the entire town, they would have to remove her from the watch and alter the entire rotation. The community was like a clock, when one piece doesn’t work, the entire process was affected. Maybe that’s what Joel was looking for. For her to actually stop patrolling. To put her in her damn place.

“Have you ever considered to just stay with your mouth shut? Really, ever since we met you always must have the last word” the man defended himself. He huffed at the girl, and he grew angrier with each word he spoke.

She considered to turn around and finally give her a true piece on what she actually thinks of him. How he takes advantage of being Tommy’s brother, the way he walks around as if he’s high and almighty, how he mocks anyone who might differ with him, basically everything about him, annoyed her. But instead, she took a deep breath.

He saw her chest rise with every breath. She stayed quiet and ignored him

Almost time to go home

She thought as the night had gone from a dark blue to see the sun rising in the east. The sky had turned into a mix of a light blues and oranges as they both stood up to signal that their patrol time was done. They both picked up their packs from the floor. She rushed through the door that let to the stairs to go and back into the town.

She felt the anger boiling inside of her, slowly building up to a cathedral of madness. The only thing in her mind is just getting him out of her sight so she wouldn’t explode and yet again, get herself in trouble. Every step she took she held back the tears. She turned her hands into fists so tight, her knuckles were turning white, only letting go when opening the door that welcomed her back into the town.

It was still early; most people were probably still asleep. The quietness of the town calmed her down. She just stopped and crouched in the middle of the street to feel the light breeze on her face. The tears were dried, and her hands were no longer in fists, she just brushed through her hair with them to stand up correctly again. A knot still in her throat as she started to walk down when she feels a hand grabbing her arm and twisting her around.

“Wait- What the fuck!” she said as she is being manhandled by Joel. Her eyes widened at the sight of the man who looks like he has had enough of her.

“It’s just us right now, tell me, what is your deal, kid?” she knew if looks could kill, she might as well be six feet underground. Her arm still being held by the man’s big hand. She knew eventually it would bruise considering she only had a light sweater on her.

“You want to know what my deal is, Miller? You. You are my fucking deal. You talk to me as if I’m an infant which I am not if you haven’t noticed. Ever since we met, you have to question every single choice I take, you are no one in my life. Do you hear that? Fucking no one, so please, let go of me and let me go on about my day, I don’t need you to ruin it, I am perfectly capable of doing that by myself” she yelled at him and took her arm back from him. She never broke the eye contact to let him know she wasn’t afraid of him. And he knew right there that if she had it in her, he might as well be knocked out. Her words hurt. She knew they would and that’s why she used them.

He looked at her in disbelief. Was he actually affected by the words spoken by the woman he seemed to hate?

“And another thing, you are an ass but everyone here is too afraid of you to actually say something about it. The only reason people stand you is because by some sick joke of destiny you are Tommy’s brother so you are just tolerable enough but believe me, if you weren’t, your days here would be counted.” She finished. The heat rising up to her cheeks. She was visibly upset spitting out her true feelings towards Joel. Her eyes watered once again but she refused to let him see them. As soon as she was done, she turned around and left him standing speechless in the middle of the street.

Joel couldn’t try to defend himself. How could he? It’s not like she was wrong, sure, she could’ve been nicer but it’s not like she owed him anything, he thought to himself. He just watched as she disappeared into the town and left him alone with his conflicting thoughts. He had a mixed feelings around the thoughts she verbally expressed towards him. He knew for some reason she disliked him but to actively hate him?

He fought the lump forming in his throat. The world around him going blurry as he noticed people starting to leave their respective houses to start the day when he just wanted to end his.

A/N:AHHHHHHHHHH

i'm so happy to be finally posting this, i spent all week working on it!!! pls let me know if any mistakes were made, i'm open for suggestions!

#my work #joel miller fic #joel miller x you #tlou fanfic #tlou fic #tlou imagine #pedro pascal fic #joel miller #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller imagine

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casualnepotism · 2 months

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i needed to get this stupid au out of my head so i went to write a lil drabble and it SPIRALED and i had to do something with it so now it's here ANYWAY

no one look at this especially not bekah 🔫

The first time Nilos found Sunny in his bed was confusing. He was fresh off a twelve-hour stakeout in Bluestown, returning to a dark apartment and an empty fridge; even his bourbon had disappeared. The realization that he’d have to try and sleep while sober only exacerbated the pounding headache, so he’d dry-popped some ibuprofen and headed for his room.

Where, tie loose around his neck and hands raised to buttons, he realized that his bed didn’t normally breathe. The sparse jumble of bedding and pillows was normal- he couldn’t remember the last time he’d properly made the damn thing- but the way the pile was moving.. that was odd. Cog was thirteen now, she hadn’t slept in his bed in years. A soft smile slipped onto his face at the thought that she’d actually turned to him for comfort again, then he scowled at the idea that she’d needed comforting and he hadn’t been there.

Fuckin typical.

Softly, he crossed the room to pull back the blanket, and stopped: a splash of teal curls was splayed on his pillows, underlaying a single long, bronze ear. Well that certainly wasn’t his daughter. For a long moment, Nilos was still. Reviewing the facts:

His partner (in crime solving, he reminded himself) was asleep in his bed,

His partner had never been in his bed before (right? Or had she? Did this happen often?),

His partner was very much asleep and, likely, would continue to be for the next at least few hours (because gods forbid she learn to trance like a normal Elf).

Which left him with a few options:

Go sleep on the couch (horrible for his back, confusing for Cog in the morning),

Go sleep in the guest room (not his bed, equally confusing for Cog in the morning),

Wake Sunny up and kick her to one of those places (objectively the correct thing to do and yet it felt rude. She was technically a guest, after all),

Just get in the bed and sleep with her (ABSOLUTELY not, he could already feel the blush he’d get from her teasing).

He was still standing, staring blankly out the window, hand on Sunny’s shoulder, when he felt a gentle touch on his thigh. Eyebrows furrowing, he looked down.

Sunny was looking up at him through dark lashes, eyes slowly blinking. Her finger didn’t move from where it was poked into his leg.

They stared at each other. Nilos could feel the silence of the room settling down on him as he tried to figure out what to say. And then-

She smiled. It was a soft and sleepy look, crinkling her whole face with contentment- even her hand relaxed from a poke to just gently holding the loose fabric of his slacks. “Hey, Bandit.”

He glared. He definitely hadn’t told himself to glare, hadn’t cared about the silly nickname in months, but he could still feel himself glaring. She smiled at him in response and for some reason his chest got tight. He took a deep breath. “Hey howdy. I’m back.”

Sunny’s fingers tightened momentarily on his pants. “Yeah. Have fun?”

“No.” It was a short answer to describe a bad, boring, completely normal night, but he was having a hard time concentrating. “Didn’t see anything, either.”

“Oh,” Sunny’s eyes had drifted from his, tracking downward and getting stuck somewhere around his neck. For another moment, silence reigned, long enough that Nilos had run through all the things he could’ve done in the past two minutes to upset her; any promise he'd made before he left that he’s left unfulfilled. He hadn’t even done any coke since he left, and fucking hell if he couldn’t feel it. His mouth opened to tell her just that and instead:

“You’re in my bed.”

Sunny’s head tilted gently to the side, an awkward movement that forced her to raise up onto an elbow. Obediently following the laws of physics, the blanket- Nilos’ hand a captive occupant- slipped from her shoulders to her ribs. His eyes traced the movement before snapping back to her face: her eyes had never left him, instead narrowing like they always did when she was trying to parse his jokes. “Yeah?” They stared at each other for a moment before his confusion must have become readable even to her, and she chuckled softly. “Right, sorry. Cog said it was fine.”

”Cog?” His daughter’s name was almost an exclamation, louder than he’d meant it to be, and Sunny’s hand had tightened instinctively. He raised his eyebrows in apology before continuing: “Why did Cog get a say?”

Her hand loosened its death grip, then released him entirely to give his leg an amused pat. Why he knew the pat was amused instead of annoyed was something he would have to investigate later. The hand settled again. Gentle, this time. Just resting. “Eh. Something about how the couch is gonna ruin my back.”

“We have a guest bed.” He blinked. “You sleep there. Often.”

“We both know that bed fuckin sucks. She was right that yours is way better.” Her face turned from general disdain at the thought of his guest bed (her bed, as he’d begun to think of it) to thoughtful, and her hand on his thigh turned from a gentle presence to steel as she anchored herself more solidly against him. Her other hand somewhat disdainfully ran over the other pillow on the bed. “This one’s shit for bedding, though.”

He had started, almost stumbling, at her grip, and allowed annoyance to crowd his tone. “Just because you like to sleep in a fucking nest doesn’t mean everyone does.”

“It’s not a nest, it’s just cozy.” She rolled her eyes at the familiar argument and gently squeezed his thigh. Her hand seemed to make it nearly all the way around his leg, a fact which he decidedly didn’t notice. Casually, as though it were normal, she patted the space beside her with her free hand. “You gonna sleep with, uh,” She paused, ran her eyes over him once again. “Like that?”

“What?” He blinked, lost for a moment. Of course he was going to sleep like this, he was exhausted. That’s normally how people slept. Blinked again. Oh. “No! No, uh. No, I was going to. Change.” He blinked again and willed the stupid blush he could feel to disappear.

For a long moment, neither of them moved: Nilos, half-leaning over the bed, his hand on the blanket over her ribs. Sunny, half-leaning up towards him, her hand wrapped gently around his thigh. He was pretty sure he should move: like he said, he had to change so that he could sleep. They could both ignore that “change” just meant taking off the button-down and pants before falling directly into the bed. Instead, they just stared at each other. Blinking.

“Right.” Sunny was decisive: Nilos usually liked that about her. When she released his leg, kicked off the blanket, and rolled off the bed to tower over him, he was conflicted about it. Nine inches didn’t feel like a lot on a measuring tape, but it felt like a mile to where she looked blankly down at him. She smiled, big and broad like always. “Right.”

“Right?” She nodded and he nodded back, confused.

“Right. You need to change. I,” Her hands flattened over her sports-bra covered chest. Or, he assumed they did: they normally did; he had maintained eye contact with the rapidly-disappearing imprint she’d left on his pillow. “I am going to. Go. For a run.”

“A run?”

“A run. Yep.” She made an aborted move to step back, mostly just rocking on her heels for a moment. “You need to change and go to sleep. I’m going for a run.”

“It’s five in the morning.” Oh good, his brain.

She nodded again, helpfully. “Yep. Nobody out.” Again, a backward heel-rock. The second time, it turned into a quick lean forward as she pressed a kiss into his hair. He blinked and she was at the door, already turning the handle as she grinned back at him. “Don’t worry. I’ll be back to drive Cog to school.”

And with a wink, she had gone.

Nilos stood, shirt partially unbuttoned, tie hanging loose, one hand gently rubbing the top of his head, and looked mindlessly between the door and the bed. Distantly, he heard the apartment door click open and shut. He blinked. It felt like Something had happened, but he couldn’t.. Tiredly, he dropped his tie to the ground and stumbled the few feet to face plant on his bed. It was warm. Warm, and smelled faintly of the cheap cigarettes Sunny preferred after a hard day. He groaned, burrowing into the blanket and shoving away the thoughts of Cog’s disappointed face when she found out he’d slept in his clothes again.

He’d bring milkshakes when they picked her up from school, tomorrow, and she’d forgive him. Probably. It usually worked.

His dreams, when they came, were cozy.

#sunny/nilos the nice guys (2016) au #it's LIKE. ugh #idk i haven't written a fic in approximately 5ever and i've CERTAINLY never written one about my friend's oc but like. this au calls to me #AND I'VE PLOTTED MORE. I HAVE MORE THOUGHTS ABOUT THEM #I HAVE OTHER IDEAS. STOP. HELP. THIS IS GONNA SPIRAL REAL #sunny ray #anyway no one look at this it's objectively bad especially the ending

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berenwrites · 1 year

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Whole New Us Ch15 - Stranger Things - Steddie

Whole New Us: Trauma Bonded and Beyond

Also on AO3 | Or here CH1 | CH2 | CH3 | CH4 | CH5 | CH6 | CH7 | CH8 | CH9 | CH10 | CH11 | CH12 | CH13 | CH14 | CH15 | CH16 | CH17 | CH18 | CH19 | CH20 | CH21 | CH22 | CH23 | CH24 | CH25 (Mature) | CH25 (Fade to black) COMPLETE

Summary: Steve has been ignoring his own problems, he’s been busy. They’ve all been busy, preoccupied with fixing everything that was broken. Vecna has been defeated, but the Upside Down is still there, and the gates are not completely closed even though Hawkins has almost returned to normal. It’s been a couple of months and the aftereffects of Steve’s encounter with the demobats is about to come back to bite him. However, it also brings some unexpected hope.

Pairing: steddie (Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson)

Rating: Teen (with mature content in later chapters)

Chapter 15. Superpower Unlocked

“Harrington, you better wake up soon because I am bored as hell, and you know what trouble I get into when I’m bored.”

The fact Steve climbed back to consciousness to hear the same voice he had been listening to when he left it, confused his slow thoughts for a while. At least Eddie didn’t sound desperate anymore. He hadn’t liked the broken edge in Eddie’s voice the last time he had heard it.

Then his memory caught up and he remembered he had been the cause of that desperation.

“The kids are all going to descend on this room again any minute, and I can’t fend them off by myself,” Eddie rambled on. “Robin will be back in an hour or so, but until then I’m the last line of defence and it would be much easier if you’d get off your lazy butt and open your eyes. I’m not going to stand for it much longer.”

“Sssh,” Steve managed to whisper, “some of us are trying to sleep.”

Making his eyes stay open for more than a second at a time was harder, but he was doing his best.

“Steve!”

Eddie’s blurred face appeared in his line of vision, so he blinked a few more times to see if he could get it to come into focus.

“Hi,” he said, and his throat felt like it had been sandblasted.

“Hi yourself,” Eddie replied. “How are you feeling?”

He hadn’t got that far in his mental reawakening, so Steve did a quick check, even moving slightly to find out.

“I don’t hurt,” he said, much to his own shock.

“Yeah, well, another superpower unlocked,” Eddie told him. “Apparently, if we’re really badly injured, we shut down to heal. The brains think that’s what I did after I was attacked by the bats. But just in case you get any stupid ideas in your head, we are never testing that one out again. Got it?”

“Okay,” he agreed, even though they both knew if it was ever one of them or the kids, it would definitely be them.

He lifted his hand and patted his face, checking what he already suspected.

“Why is there a tube up my nose and down my throat?” he asked.

“Feeding tube,” Eddie said. “The more fuel we have the faster we heal, apparently. They’ve been pumping you full of everything you need.”

At least that made sense.

Looking around the room, the first thing he noticed was there weren’t any windows.

“Where are we?” he asked.

“Government lab, they apparently refurbished a lot more of Hawkins Labs then they were letting on to most people,” Eddie told him in a surprisingly nonchalant tone, considering the twist it caused in Steve’s stomach. “But don’t worry, El has been saying jump and they’ve been asking how high. Love that kid the more I get to know her. Glad she’s on our side. Man is she scary when she’s annoyed.”

“Yeah,” Steve agreed, doing his very best to squash the panic rising in his chest.

The memory of metal bonds and electricity flashed into his head, the fear and the pain scorching through him as though they were real.

“Hey, hey, Steve.”

Hands gently cupped both sides of his face as Eddie stared into his eyes.

“It’s okay, you’re safe,” Eddie told him, firmly and calmly. “We let them bring you here because a normal hospital wouldn’t have known what to do, but we won’t leave you alone and we’re taking you home as soon as you’re strong enough. No one is going to be allowed to hurt you again, are we clear?”

Eddie’s eyes flashed red as he said the last part and Steve had no choice but to believe him.

“Steve, talk to me,” Eddie said, gaze searching his face. “Do you understand.”

He nodded, even as his chest still felt tight.

“Hell, sweetheart,” Eddie said, “for once we’re going to keep you safe.”

Eddie kissed him on the forehead before moving away a little. The moment Eddie wasn’t in his personal space anymore, Steve felt bereft.

“Okay,” was the best he could do, “sorry.”

“No apologising,” Eddie told him, taking his hand. “You haven’t done anything wrong.”

“Sorry,” he said automatically.

“If you don’t stop saying sorry,” Eddie said, giving him a playful smile that almost reached his eyes, “I’m gonna climb up there and hug you so hard you can’t say it, and I’ll keep doing it and embarrass the hell out of you in front of the kids.”

Steve felt tears stinging the back of his eyes as he tried very hard not to completely fall apart. He was used to being the strong one, holding it together in his role as protector, but he felt so broken. The hum of Eddie in the back of his brain wasn’t enough as he struggled.

“Sorry,” he said in a tiny little voice.

“Oh, Stevie, sweetheart,” Eddie said, already moving. “All you had to do was ask.”

Shucking off his jacket and shoes, Eddie climbed onto the bed. Steve moved to the side and let Eddie pull him close, wrapping strong arms around him. That’s when the tears came. He couldn’t stop them as everything came pouring out. The terror, the anger, the shame, they all mixed together in wracking, unstoppable sobs.

“I’ve got you, Stevie,” Eddie whispered into his hair, “I’ve got you.”

It was unpleasant crying with a tube up his nose, but it was cathartic, and Eddie held him tight. In the end he missed most of the consequences because it turned out he was still on the wrong side of exhausted and he slipped back into sleep in Eddie’s arms.

~*~

When Steve woke a second time, there were familiar voices talking in excited whispers.

“Henderson, if you wake up Steve, I will personally spank you,” Eddie said in a hushed tone.

“That’s child abuse,” Dustin replied, and Steve could hear the outrage.

He couldn’t help smiling into Eddie’s neck.

“I’d pay money to see that,” he croaked quietly.

“Hey, Stevie,” Eddie said, shifting a little, but not letting go, which Steve greatly appreciated, “welcome back. You sound like you could do with some water.”

He nodded, his throat still felt like it had been grated and he’d cried, so it was even worse. Leaving the comfort of Eddie’s arms was very low on his to-do list, but he was pretty sure drinking would not go well if he didn’t. There was the sound of plastic hitting plastic, so he carefully pushed himself away from Eddie’s side.

Blinking a couple of times as he sat up, he finally looked around the room.

“Hi,” he said, voice almost disappearing entirely as he took in Dustin, El, Mike, and Lucas squashed onto two chairs and Robin standing up pouring him some water.

“Here you go, Dingus,” Robin said, giving him a small smile that did nothing to hide her worry. “How are you feeling?”

“Thanks,” he replied as he did his best to figure out an answer to her question.

He sipped the water as he thought about it.

“Better than expected,” is what he chose to say.

That was when he noticed his pinky finger on his right hand, the one where his tormentors had extracted the claw to add to their specimen pile. It looked whole and undamaged. He flexed his fingers and forced out the claws, astonished when everything seemed perfectly normal. Shocked he ran his tongue carefully against the back of his teeth, lifting his hand to his mouth just to make sure of what he found.

“They grew back,” he said in wonder. “They grew back in three days.”

“Actually, they grew back in one,” Eddie told him.

“Yeah, the rest of the time you were fixing the three really big holes in you,” Robin said and gave him a glare, as if she was annoyed with him.

When she reached out and took his hand, he knew she didn’t mean it.

“Never do that again,” she told him firmly.

“I will do my very best,” he promised and tried to ignore the prickling behind his eyes.

He refused to cry again after only waking up less than five minutes before.

“My turn,” Robin said, giving Eddie a look.

“As my lady wishes,” Eddie replied grandly, even as he went to climb off the bed.

Steve had to bite his lip to prevent himself making an embarrassing noise at the loss of contact. He didn’t have to worry for long, however, because Robin insinuated herself into Eddie’s previous spot and pulled him close. Eddie was kind enough to take the water from him, so he didn’t spill it.

“Relax, Steve,” Robin said gently, “we’ve got you. Dustin even wanted to make a rota.”

He managed a small laugh at that, but it sounded kind of watery, even to him.

“At least I didn’t want to colour code it,” Dustin piped up. “You know if Nancy was here, she would have.”

“This isn’t the biggest bed,” he said, letting himself rest in his best friend’s embrace, “but I’m sure there’s room for more.”

Dustin didn’t need telling twice, coming round to his other side. It was a bit of a squeeze, but El and Dustin ended up sitting on his right side with Lucas and Mike taking places on the end of the bed while Eddie watched them smiling fondly. Steve felt safe for the first time since two strangers had walked into Family Video.

“Okay,” he said once everyone was comfortable, “tell me everything I missed. I want the whole story.”

It was far easier to focus on what his found-family had done to get him back than what he had been going through. Laying there and letting Robin play with his hair, he listened as everyone began to tell their tale.

As it turned out, when it was an extreme situation, Steve was capable of sending actual mental images to Eddie rather than just impressions, which probably explained the dreams he’d been having of Eddie all those months. It seemed given the right impetus it worked outside the Upside Down too.

“Did you… while I..?” Steve had to ask when he heard the details about that.

“I got echoes while they had you,” Eddie told him, “but nothing like when they first grabbed you. I got the impression you really wanted me to know that first time.”

Relieved Eddie had not had to suffer with him, he nodded, but he couldn’t find his voice to speak. He remembered all too clearly the desperation to make sure Eddie was not in danger too.

“And it turns out I do not react well to you being in danger and in pain,” was Eddie’s next comment on the matter. “Had to read in my guys because I went full vamp right in the middle of rehearsal.”

“Gareth took out one of the Russians with drumsticks,” Mike added, apparently impressed by that.

“Never knew he could be so aggressive,” Eddie agreed. “He mentioned taking some self-defence classes since spring break, but I’m not sure drumsticks were in the curriculum.”

“It’s always the quiet ones you have to watch,” Steve said while valiantly trying to keep his eyes open.

He was warm and safe, so it was hard.

“Owens was doing his best, but the government is full of bureaucrats,” Dustin was saying when he zoned back in and realised he had drifted off for a little while. “We took one of his encrypted radios and got on the move before Eddie spontaneously combusted.”

“The government can kiss my ass,” Eddie said. “There was no time for forms in triplicate.”

“We always have to do it ourselves,” Mike concluded. “How did they miss another Russian base? Did they not look? Are they mouthbreathing morons?”

The kid’s utter disgust made Steve smile.

“At least they showed up to finish everything,” Lucas said. “There were more people there than we could have dealt with.”

“They have their uses,” El said with a nod. “We are much better at this than they are though.”

And Steve couldn’t disagree. However, that sent the conversation on a tangent that he was too sleepy to follow, and he drifted off again as Dustin and Mike debated which was the biggest disaster the government had managed in Hawkins to date.

End of Chapter 15

Chapter 16

#stranger things fanfiction #steddie #steve harrington/eddie munson #steve x eddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #eddie lives #stranger things #st: whole new us #fanfic #post season 4 #vampires #kind of vampires #hurt/comfort

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looooooooomis · 3 years

Text

FINAL GIRL | FIVE

You were his final girl. And there was no chance in hell that anyone or anything was going to mess that up.

p a r t five | t h e c a b i n (part I)

masterlist here

pairing: Billy Loomis x f!reader word count: 5.6k (I’M SORRY I GOT CARRIED AWAY) warnings: s m u t (18 +!!!!!)

A/N: after 8 months of MIA, SHE’S BACK BABY!!! this is part 1 of 2 of our fav couple being at the cabin x next chapter will have soft moments I promise lmao

You should have been paying more attention.

If you’d been paying more attention, you wouldn’t have had five sets of eyes currently watching your every move, waiting for an answer you didn’t have. Why had you thought it was a good idea to stay up as late as you had packing your overnight bag for the cabin? If you had gone to bed at a reasonable hour, you wouldn’t have been as braindead as you currently were and, if you hadn’t been braindead, you wouldn’t have wound up in whatever ring of hell you were currently stuck in as your friends stared at you as though you’d grown a second head.

You pleaded with your tongue to say anything, pleaded for your brain to register a decent enough lie to make this uncomfortable silence end but nothing came out of your mouth. Only a pathetic hum and a gusto of forced laughter.

You wanted to die.

It should have been an easy enough answer to what was an even easier question. One that you’d practiced answering for the last two days and yet, as the moment for the lie came and went, you were left scrambling like a fucking moron.

You didn’t dare look at Billy as Sid curled into his side knowing if you managed to catch his coffee-coloured stare, you’d only be met with something between terror and amusement as you royally shit the bed. So, instead, you did the next best thing. You replayed the question over and over again in your head until you were driven mad.

‘Are you up for a movie this weekend?’

It was a simple enough question, one you’d managed to decline easily enough but, as Tatum frowned and asked the one question you were expecting to hear, your mind went blank.

‘Why? What are you doing?’

The answer you were supposed to say: I have to babysit my cousin in Santa Rosa all weekend. The answer they got? Silence. Pure, awkward as fuck, silence.

“Earth to Y/N,” Tatum laughed, brows furrowing. “Are you alive?”

“Sorry,” you huffed out a quiet laugh and shook your head, “I barely slept last night, I’m braindead.”

While it wasn’t a lie, you were still on edge. You’d think after months of sneaking around with the asshole sitting in front of you that you would have chilled out a little more but not today. Maybe it was the nerves of a full weekend away with Billy Loomis as his girlfriend hosted a fucking movie night sans her boyfriend and best friend – but something was making you stumble over what should have been second nature to you.

“You feeling okay?” Sid, the angel she was, asked with a small frown. Your stomach twisted in the familiar way it always did when your sweet friend showed concern. Concern which you most definitely didn’t deserve. “You seem…off.”

It would have been so easy to confess your dark little twisted affair with Billy right then and there. To just open your mouth and let the truth of everything you’d been doing behind her back play out. But you knew it would break her heart and, more than that, you were a fucking coward.

“I’m fine, Sid,” you smacked on a small smile and leaned into your locker. You had one more class until you were home free. Free of your friends’ inquiring eyes, free of Biology, free of Woodsboro. If you managed to get through this incredibly uncomfortable moment. “And I would if I could, trust me. I have to babysit my little cousin in Santa Rosa.” You feigned disappointment with a small frown. You could see Stu’s lips tug up in mild amusement out of the corner of your eye. “She’s nine, so if I don’t come back on Monday, know that she annoyed me to death.”

Randy scoffed and casually threw his arm around your neck. “Every day I’m thankful I don’t have any snot-nosed kids in my family. Losing my weekend to babysit? I’d rather rot.”

Despite your guilt, you managed a small smile as you looked across at him. “I think the kid would rather you rot, too. You’d be a terrible babysitter.”

“She’s right,” Tatum smirked, “you’d show the kid one of your weirdo movies where a girl with big tits is running helplessly away from her killer. It’d scar the kid for life.”

“Or,” Randy mused, “prepare them for the real world. Put some hair on their chest and all that shit.”

“Furthering my point, Meeks, you’d be a shit babysitter.” You laughed. “But, yeah, I’ll be suffering at the hands of a nine-year-old, so you guys have fun without me.”

“How about you, lover boy?” Tatum asked, looking across at Billy. “Will you be joining us this weekend?”

You should have averted your eyes. Should have done anything besides wait, with bated breath, to see what Billy would say. Slowly, those brown eyes tapered over towards you just briefly before looking at Tatum. With a casual shrug of his shoulders, Billy shook his head and leaned into Sid. “Can’t,” he merely said, “I’m going up north with my dad. He wants to get some of his affairs in order or something, I don’t know.” He ran a hand through his hair. “All I know is I was promised free beer if I helped him. So, I’m helping him.”

If Sid caught onto his lie, her face didn’t betray her once. And, as she looked up at her boyfriend with doting eyes, you couldn’t help but feel that pang of shame slice into your gut once again. She believed him. She always believed him. Believed you. Regardless of how good it felt to have Billy, that shame of knowing just who it was unwittingly hurting in the process never dissipated.

“You sure you guys won’t need help?” Sid asked, further digging that knife of shame into your chest. “Besides this movie, I’ve got nothing else going on this weekend.”

“Real nice,” Randy teased. “She’d rather watch Billy’s dad punch away at a fucking calculator then sit down with her nearest and dearest.”

Billy ignored Randy entirely as he glanced down at the brunette. “I’m sure,” he affirmed, giving her a quick squeeze. “Enjoy the movie night. I’ll be there for the next one.”

He lied so effortlessly, so casually, that it should have unnerved you. But it didn’t. Because for as good of a liar Billy Loomis was, you were right here with him. This dangerous little game the two of you were playing was becoming second nature to you and for as much as it pained you to see Sidney get lied to, you couldn’t help yourself.

You loved Billy. Billy loved you. Right person, wrong time. Only rather than wait like you knew you should have, Billy’s glow was much too enthralling to miss. You were both moths to each other’s’ flames and no amount of guilt or shame was strong enough to outweigh the otherworldly affliction the two of you had for one another.

The bell signifying your final class rung out, snapping you out of your brief reverie as you blinked and focused on pushing Randy off of you. “Want to drive me to the bus station?” You asked him. “I don’t want to drive all the way to Santa Rosa, so I bought a bus ticket.”

“Tonight?” Randy considered it briefly before shrugging. “Sure, I guess. I’ve got a shift tonight at seven, though. When’s your bus leave?”

“Six thirty,” you lied, mainly doing this so that should anyone drive by your house this weekend and see your car still neatly parked in your driveway, they wouldn’t bat an eye. “I owe you.”

“Yeah, you do,” Randy agreed. “And, lucky for you, I accept a lot of different payment options.” He wriggled his brows, earning a playful smack from you and an annoyed glare from Billy. Thankfully, Randy didn’t catch onto the latter. “Pick you up at six?”

You nodded. “Perfect.”

With your eyes flickering to Billy’s once more, you managed to shoot everyone a quick smile before disappearing down the hall towards Biology. Just how you’d managed to dance your way out of what could have been an incredibly awkward moment, you didn’t know. But as you felt that weighty stare of Billy’s on your back as you walked away, there was an air of excitement that swallowed you whole.

No matter how much guilt you felt, no matter how sick it made you to see Sidney get hurt, even if she didn’t quite know about just yet, there was a much larger part of you that couldn’t wait to get Billy alone.

Because for the first time in the seven months since you’d started this torrid little affair, you were finally getting Billy all to yourself. No prying eyes, no secret kisses, no having to hide every part of your relationship with the man. None of that.

This weekend, it was you and it was Billy.

And you couldn’t fucking wait.

»»-------------¤-------------««

Randy, being the superstar he was, had dropped you off at the station a little after six-fifteen and by six-thirty-two, just around the time the actual bus was leaving for Santa Rosa, you were scrambling into Billy’s car with a wild grin on your face.

Just how the pair of you had managed to pull it off, especially given your brain lapse earlier in the day, was beyond you. But, as Billy tore off down the main street leading to the freeway, you couldn’t help but feel a sense of freedom engulf you the farther and farther you got from town.

It was exhilarating.

And, as you glanced at Billy, who couldn’t have looked more like a movie star with his dark locks blowing with the wind cascading in through his open window, you couldn’t help but reach across the divide to gently squeeze his jean-clad thigh.

“Thank you,” you found yourself muttering and as those brown eyes met yours, you couldn’t help but grin. “For your stupid key proposal. In hindsight, it was very sweet.”

The dimple in Billy’s cheek deepened as his own grin grew. “Glad you let me steal you away?”

You loosened your seatbelt momentarily and leaned across to give him a kiss on the cheek. “Very glad.” You made a move to pull away but stopped when he gently grabbed your chin with the hand not holding the wheel. “What—”

The kiss, while dangerously stupid, was short and sweet but the emotion behind it, the genuine happiness that exuded out of Billy in those few seconds was palpable. “I really do fucking love you, you know that?”

“You’ve mentioned it,” you hummed and slinked back into your seat. When his large hand found your thigh, he gave it a firm squeeze that sent shockwaves throughout your whole body.

“Not going to say it back?” He teased, giving you a sidelong glance as he drew nearer to the freeway.

“I’d rather show it.” Rather than put your seatbelt back on, you shimmed in your seat and leaned into him as your fingers scraped along his thighs towards the button of his jeans. “Eyes on the road, Loomis.”

Easier said than done, Billy thought, torn between watching the road and watching you unzip his jeans. Raising his ass out of the seat just long enough to allow you to tug his pants down his thighs, the second Billy saw yours eyes light up as his now somewhat erect cock sprung free of his jeans, keeping his eyes on the road seemed impossible. But, the second he saw that pretty mouth of yours perk up in anticipation, it was game over. “Are you trying to get us killed?”

A low chuckle escaped your lips as you began to pump his length with your hand. “Focus on the road, Billy.”

“You say that like it’s easy.” Not being able to keep his hands off of you, he reached for your nipple and gave it a pinch through your shirt. “Take your shirt off, baby.”

“Shut up and drive.” You chided him, shimming in your seat so that you were on your knees leaning over the console. His cock was rock hard now and, as you ran your tongue alongside his length, from the base of it all the way up to coax your tongue along the precum that had gathered along his head, you felt him shiver beneath you.

“Fuck,” he hissed, tangling his fingers through your hair. You were too fucking good with that mouth of yours.

Still pumping the base of his cock with one hand, you swirled your tongue along the tip of his dick again before taking that perfectly girthy cock in your mouth. His grip tightened on your hair and your eyes watered as he pushed your head down to fully take the length of him inside of your mouth. He heard you gag on him but even as his grip eased up, you continued your pursuit of deepthroating him.

His breathing was shallow as he felt your hot mouth all over him. Between the sounds of your wet mouth taking him in and the occasional gag as you choked on his length, Billy was in heaven.

But having you this close as you fucked him with your mouth whilst still fully clothed was killing him. He needed to feel you. He wanted to feel your juices on his fingers and running down those perfect fucking thighs as he fingerfucked you. He wanted to hear you moan, feel you moan on his cock as he made you feel as good as you were making him feel.

He wanted all of you, needed all of you.

Trying his damnedest not to shut his eyes as your mouth brought him closer to the edge, he reached beneath you to work on your own zipper but when that proved to be impossible, a frustrated growl tore out of his lips. “Undo your pants.” He hissed through bared teeth.

You hummed against his dick which nearly sent him into the other land of traffic. “No,” you purred, “I want to make you feel good.”

With one hand on the wheel and the other now gliding up and down your back as you fucked him with your mouth, Billy couldn’t help but buck into your mouth as you began to massage his balls. He was going to bust and soon if he wasn’t careful.

You were too fucking good and he was too fucking in love with you not to get lost in the way you made him feel.

“Touch yourself, at least,” he breathed out, desperate to see that pretty cunt. “Please, baby.”

Not granting him the satisfaction, you simply dug your nails into his thighs and moaned onto his cock and the sensation of it alone was almost enough to make him come down your throat. It seemed to slither around his cock, making him twitch and buck into your mouth.

But it was the second you moaned out his name as you swirled your wet mouth along the head of his dick one final time, swallowing back his precum with a contented hum, that Billy blew his loud inside of your mouth.

For a good five seconds, he didn’t care if he crashed the goddamn car as he watched you swallow his seed. He was bucking into your mouth, his breathing was ragged, as you guzzled him back and, as you finally released his cock with a pop, Billy almost lost it.

With a devilish grin, you simply wiped a finger along the edge of your lips and leaned back into your seat with a satisfied glimmer in your eyes. You knew you’d be in for it once he got his hands on you at the cabin, but for now, as you watched him lamely try and pull his jeans up his body to cover his slowly softening cock, you couldn’t help but laugh.

“What’s the matter, Billy?” You teased, fastening your seatbelt back up. “You look a little rattled.”

“Yeah, yeah,” he simpered, not bothering with the zipper or button of his jeans. Instead, he reached across the divide and grabbed for your hand as he ghosted his lips across your knuckles. “Just wait until we get to the cabin.”

With your suspicions confirmed, you couldn’t help but beam across at him as you drove further and further away from Woodsboro. That was definitely a threat and good god were you excited for its execution.

»»-------------¤-------------««

By the time you’d pulled into the Loomis family cabin, it was pitch black outside.

The moon was too high in the sky and only a sliver of its light poked through the tall pine trees that surrounded the small house but, even with the low light surrounding you, the shadows that danced along the lake was enough to bring out a small smile as you quietly made your way out of the car. You didn’t need full sun to see the beauty surrounding you and the smell of the fresh air mixed with the spice of pine made any ounce of nerves filter out of you.

You were happy.

Unreservedly so.

Glancing across the roof towards Billy, he seemed almost distracted as he looked around at the familiar surroundings. You couldn’t quite tell if he was feeling as happy as you were in those brief moments, but you couldn’t quite blame him for that. The cabin held a lot of memories within it, many of which you knew included his mother. Where you felt freed and excited, you could tell the weight of his current whereabouts was heavy on his shoulders.

“Hey,” you muttered, slicing into the quietude around you. Walking around the front of the car, those brown eyes found yours as you circled your arms around his middle. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” he assured, but his voice was low and distant. All the same, however, his strong arms enveloped you as he kissed your hairline. “Lost in a memory, I guess.”

You nodded into the crook of his neck but said nothing. He needed time to decompress, to familiarize himself with a house he hadn’t been in since his mother left. So, you’d give him that time.

For what must have been minutes, the two of you simply stood at the helm of porch holding onto one another. It wasn’t until Billy placed another quick kiss to your forehead that you felt his arms slowly fall only to grasp your hand in his own. “Come on,” he hummed. His grip on your hand was firm as he walked up the steps leading to the wrap around porch and as he stuck the key inside of the lock and opened the front door, the smell of cedar surrounded you.

The cabin was gorgeous. Wooden slats covered every square inch of the small house and a small fireplace sat at the front of the house with a worn-in couch and chair facing it. It was obvious nobody had come to visit for quite some time judging by the dust lining most of the countertops and shelving units, but you didn’t care.

To you, it was perfect.

Your own little oasis with the boy you loved without any sort of outside interruption.

You released his hand to take a brief look around the small living space but you could feel his eyes on you with every step you took. You knew he was looking to get even with you after your little stunt in the car, but you also knew that he hadn’t quite been expecting the swell of emotions to hit him upon driving up to the cabin. So, you continued to wander around the cabin to both grant him the space he may or may not have needed and, simply, to snoop around.

There were family pictures lining the tables and one in particular made you smile as you caught sight of a young Billy swinging from a tire swing. With a quiet laugh, you picked the frame up and surveyed it with a fond smile on your lips. “Cute,” you remarked, looking across to catch his stare. “A little model, eh?”

Billy watched you carefully place the frame down on the table before continuing on with your self-guided tour. No matter how hard he tried, regardless of the bittersweet memories swirling around inside of his brain, he couldn’t take his eyes off of you. Not that he ever really could, but there was an ease rolling off of you tonight, coming off of you in waves, that drew him in.

“I’ve been thinking about this all week, you know that?” He remarked, leaning against the back of the couch as he watched you pick up another picture frame. “Just me and you. Out here alone in the woods for an entire weekend.”

“Sounds like a scary movie when you put it that way,” you goaded with a wink. “Or a really niche porno.”

“Why not a bit of both?” His molasses coloured eyes glimmered mischievously as you walked up to him and stepped between his legs. The second you were close, he pulled you flush against his chest and kissed the tip of your nose as he pushed your hair back and away from your face. “Both could be fun.”

You grinned. “I’m down for anything,” you shrugged. “So long as you promise to take me on an actual date tomorrow. We’re not just fucking like bunnies inside of the cabin all weekend.”

“Heaven forbid,” he leaned in and gave you a slow, torturous kiss.

“I’m serious, Billy,” you moaned.

Pulling away from your mouth, Billy nudged his nose against yours and nodded. “The entire population in Bumfuck, California will know you’re my girl by the end of the weekend,” he avowed, skimming his hands down to your ass to give it a firm squeeze. “I promise.”

“Oh, yeah?” You hummed, kissing him again.

His calloused hands slipped beneath your shirt and scraped up your side. “Yeah.” Digging his hips into yours, he gave you one last kiss before nodding towards the bedroom. “Take your clothes off.”

You giggled as he slapped your ass to steer you down the narrow hallway. “And if I don’t?”

“I’ll rip them off of you,” he simply said, “so either they remain in one piece or I ruin your outfit.”

You glanced down at your jeans and tank before frowning. You looked cute tonight and you’d be damned if the bastard ripped them. So, being the good girl you were, you held his stare and slowly slinked out of your clothes. His eyes seemed so much darker as he watched you strip and the small smirk he wore slowly fell into a hungry thin line as you then perched yourself on the edge of the bed, completely nude.

“You just going to stand there looking pretty or are you going to do something about this?” You slipped your fingers between your thighs and ran your fingers along your swollen clit. A low moan slipped out of your lips at the sensation. “I’m already so wet for you, Billy.”

Slowly, Billy stepped towards you and undid his belt. Leaning down, he kissed you, hard, and steered you backwards on the bed beneath you until your head reached the soft pillows. You could feel his cock straining against his jeans but rather than grant himself any sort of reprieve, you watched him gently grasp your hands and raise them above your head only to wrap his belt around your wrists.

In the blink of an eye, you were tied to the bedposts.

“Is this payback for the car blowie?” You laughed, looking up at your restrained wrists. “If it is, I can’t say I’m mad about it.”

“You wanted something between a horror movie and a niche porno, remember?” He hummed against your skin, placing sloppy kisses along the vein that ran along your neck as he pinched your nipple. “God, you’re fucking perfect. You know that?”

He bit down on your collarbone, kissing his way down your chest until his warm mouth wrapped around your nipple. You could feel his teeth slither along your breast as his tongue lapped expertly on the sensitive bud. You hissed, arching into his mouth as your wrists, on instinct, fought for freedom. “Hardly.”

His eyes met yours as he slowly released your nipple. You were in nothing, of course, but he was still fully clothed, and you hated him for it. You hungrily eyed the bulge in his jeans as he propped himself up on his arm, letting his other hand glide up your chest and neck until it cupped your cheek. His nose brushed against yours, nudging it up to allow his lips to hover just over yours. Close enough that you could almost taste them, but much too far away to satisfy the hunger you had for the man.

“I love you,” he whispered, thumb stroking the apple of your cheek as his warm, brown eyes swallowed you up. “You know that, right?”

“Yes,” you swallowed hard and tilted your head up just enough to finally catch his lips. But, just as quickly as it happened, the man pulled away and let his hand begin to roam down your body. His mouth was at your ear now, nibbling at your earlobe as his hot breath slithered against your neck. You shivered. “I love you, too.”

His voice was gruff in your ear. “I’d kill for you,” his hand continued its journey down your throat, brushing past your nipple, down the length of your stomach until reaching the small smattering of hair along your mound. He was careful to keep his hands from dipping any lower, tormenting you as best to his ability, which just about killed you, if you were being honest. “You know that?”

Bucking your hips up, you nearly growled at the lack of attention you were receiving. You were soaked and touch-starved for him. His fingers, his mouth, the erection currently poking into your thigh, anything. “I wouldn’t ask you to do that,” you managed a quiet laugh. “But I appreciate it.”

His teeth bit down on your neck again. “But, I would. I’d do anything for you, sweetheart.”

His hand slipped further down to your sopping cunt and as he slowly slipped his fingers through your wet folds, the moan he got in return nearly killed him. “Billy,” you whispered desperately. It felt as though you were going to die if you didn’t feel him inside of you. “Please.”

His lips hovered over yours and on instinct, you caught his bottom lip between your teeth and bucked your hips against his hand. He snarled as you bit down on his lip but as the metallic taste of blood met his tongue, it was as though Billy was transcending. His pace on your clit quickened but it was still too slow for you and he knew it. He was torturing you, killing you, and he was enjoying every second of it. Struggling against the belt, your struggle was all for naught as it didn’t so much as move an inch.

“You’d love me, no matter what, right?” He asked, slipping one of his fingers inside of you as he kissed his way down to your chest. Lapping at your nipple, Billy was gentle at first before biting down hard enough to draw blood. Tit for Tat.

“Yes,” you moaned. Your entire body was on fire as his fingers brought you closer to the edge. “But I’d love you even more if you fucked me. You’re killing me, Loomis.”

Licking up the small trail of blood off of your tits, Billy hummed against your nipple and added another finger inside of your pussy. He’d fuck you soon but right now, he needed to feel your entire body light up the way it always had when he drove you into that fit of madness. You were a woman unhinged in the bedroom, he knew as much, and he knew exactly how to get that animal inside of you out.

“You’re so fucking wet,” he admired, reaching his hand up to coat your tit in your own slick. When it was sufficiently wet, he licked your juices off of your breast and growled. God, you tasted so fucking good. “You’re my girl, Y/N, you’re always going to be my girl, right?”

You looked up at him as those words fell from his lips. His brown hair hung down his forehead, his neck red from the strain of having to watch you writhe beneath him without doing a damned thing about it. But what struck you was the look of vulnerability in those brown eyes. That longing, far-away look as his eyes searched yours.

He wanted nothing more than to hear you say that you wanted him. Needed him. Just as much as he needed you.

“Always,” the answer tumbled out of your lips before you so much as thought twice. “I’m your girl, Billy.”

His mouth caught yours in a bruising kiss. Finally, his pace quickened inside of you as met your throbbing core with his dept fingers. With his thumb circling your clit, he dipped two fingers inside of you and grinned against your mouth as you let out a low, desperate moan.

It happened so fast after that. One moment, you were the one tied up on the bed and the next, he’d released you, stripped himself naked, and managed to flip you over so that you were the one on top of him, straddling his waist. Pulling away from you mouth, Billy’s eyes darkened as he saw that familiar glimmer in your eyes. That animalistic side of you was out in full force now.

“Get up here.” He demanded.

You smirked and leaned across him so that your lips hovered over his. “Why would I want to do that?”

He leaned up, the veins in his neck swelled against his neck as he caught your bottom lip between his teeth. “Get. Up. Here.”

Releasing your lip, Billy watched you smirk and crawl up the remainder of his body until your pussy was less than an inch away from his mouth. Grabbing onto the metal of the headboard you’d just been tied up to, you gasped as Billy’s tongue slid into your folds. Finding your clit instantly, you moaned and allowed your eyes to fall shut as you reached down to play with your hardened nipples.

Fuck, what Billy could do with his mouth should have been illegal.

He sucked and lapped at your clit as you rocked back and forth against his mouth. His fingers dug into your hips, so much so that you knew there would be bruises in the morning but, blinded by the pleasure between your thighs, you couldn’t care less.

The moans that were coming out of you were raw and guttural and, as you played with your own tits, envisioning his hands being the ones to squeeze and nip on the swollen buds of your nipples, you saw stars.

“Fuck,” you moaned out, “Billy, baby, fuck.”

He pulled your hips further down so that you were sitting on his face. Not just hovering but sitting on that perfect mouth of his as he held you in place. You knew it must have been hard for him to breathe but he was adamant and as his tongue continued its assault on your throbbing cunt, you came devastatingly hard and incredibly loud.

Stars danced behind your eyes as you continued to ride out your orgasm. When you couldn’t take another second of Billy’s skilled tongue, you climbed off of him only to feel his large hands take hold of your hips again.

Swinging you around so that you were on your back and he was the one hovering over you, Billy wasted no time in slipping his rock-hard erection into your soaking pussy.

He was thrusting hard and the sounds of your juices squelching with every thrust of his cock would have been off-putting if it hadn’t been for the raw, primal need coursing off of the pair of you in waves. He was kissing your lips and biting them and suckling your neck as he continued to rail into you with all of passion in the world. You weren’t sure you’d ever seen him this riled up and you had to admit it was inherently sexy seeing him so affected by you.

Not surprising in the least, it didn’t take him long to come. You’d riled him up to the point of no return in the car and, as you felt him come inside of you, you all but laughed when he dramatically crashed on the bed beside you.

Sweat glistened over every inch of body and the sheen of your juices was still on his lips as he kissed you. This kiss was slow, methodical. Sweet. And you felt yourself fall even harder for the man as he broke the kiss and gently brushed your hair away from your now damp forehead.

Wrapping one arm around your chest, Billy held you against him as he propped himself against the headboard. You were both naked and sweating and while a shower was something you both definitely needed, neither of you found yourselves all too willing to move out of the other’s embrace.

“Is it hard being back here?” You asked, listening to his heart beating in his chest.

“For a second, maybe,” he admitted, soothing your hair down. “Not now.”

“What’s changed?” You asked with a small smile. “The sex was that good, huh?”

A quiet chuckle shook his chest as he kissed the top of your head. “I think horror meets niche porn is my new favourite genre.”

Kissing his naked chest, you grinned into his body. “Same.”

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specialagentlokitty · 2 years

Text

Jacob black x Autistic!reader - maths sucks

Hmmm, what about another autistic!reader x Jacob? Wanna wait until you're a little further into the show to request for Damon. I have two ideas, which either can be used or they can be combined however u want: 1st idea, a continuation of Werewolves Are Better, bc Bella is headed for the dark side and I wanna know where it goes. 2nd idea, online classes are kicking my butt, so maybe Jacob helping reader calm down when upset about how hard math is? Take ur time and do whichever calls to u! 👑 - Anon 💜

Staring at your laptop you groaned loudly.

You just wanted to slam it shut, throw it out the window and never see it again.

You didn’t understand a single with, you did everything you were supposed to do for the class, everything you put on the quiz was right and you knew it was.

Yet somehow you didn’t pass.

“What the hell…?!” You whined quietly.

Jacob looked up from his spot on your couch and rose a brow as he set his phone down.

Leaning over the back of the couch, he waved a little to gain your attention.

“You good?”

“No, my teacher sucks and I’m done with learning.”

Standing up, you made your way over and tossed yourself into the empty space next to him.

Jacob laughed softly and opened his arms, letting you crawl into his embrace as you closed your eyes. Letting out a small sigh.

“What’s going on?” He asked.

“I’ve failed my quiz and I don’t get how…”

Jacob kissed the top of your head and gave you a gentle squeeze.

“Let me have a look.”

Jacob got up, passing you your small plushie you kept on the couch, he kissed your forehead before making his way over to the laptop.

You just laid there, watching TV while he read over your work to try and figure out a way to help you.

You hated math, it was hard enough for you to figure out without your teacher failing you on the entire quiz.

“I see a few questions that are wrong, but most of them are right.”

“I did them all right! I don’t get where I went wrong!”

“Hey, it’s okay.”

Jacob walked over and knelt in front of you, placing a hand over yours as he gave you a gentle smile.

“It’s just because you didn’t show your working out is all.”

“That’s so stupid!”

You tossed your plushie across the room and Jacob quickly took your hands in his.

Pressing a kiss to your knuckles, he held your hands between his as he smiled softly at you.

“Breathe. It’s okay.”

“It’s not it’s so stupid! My whole grade depends on this quiz!”

“Listen to me okay? We’re gonna take a break, have some food and a nap. Then we’re going to retake it, you’ve got a final try and I’ll remind you to show your working, okay?”

You huffed but nodded your head, tugging him onto the couch with you.

You really hates these online classes, and math was the worst but Jacob wasn’t going to let struggle with math.

Even though he shouldn’t he was going to help you, because he knew you could do it, you just needed someone with you to remind you not to forget things

#twilight x reader #twilight imagine #twilight #jacob black x reader #jacob black imagine #jacob black

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ssplague · 3 years

Text

Alpha Bakugou & his late blooming Omega girlfriend 🌬🥀

PART TWO

Honorable mentions: @jazzylove @bakugoismisunderstood @koreylive

Okay since so many of you seemed to really enjoy this “Just thinking about”, I’m turning it into a short story. I’m thinking it will have four parts all together (including the original post). So I know I’d said that I’d give you a nice big dose of Scumbag Suki this update, buuuut that was before I knew this was going to take off like it did 🙈 The next one is entirely his POV so you’ll get your fill then!

Part 3

🌌✨🌠

“Suki, did you really have to be that harsh towards Izuku when we left the playground earlier? I know you dislike him now but….”

You trail off as you get settled on the plush, blanket lined floor of the small tent you and Bakugou had set up in your backyard. Supposedly there was going to be “A shit load of shooting stars tonight!” acording to one of your classmates. You were excited and insisted on staying up to watch, and as usual, Katsuki inserts himself into any and everything you do. Therefore; The two of you had rushed home after school, asked both your mothers and pleaded to spend the night together out in the yard. Deciding that you two were still at the age where anything other than star gazing was unlikely to happen, they allowed it.

Battery operated fairy lights were strung along the roof of the tent and a small lantern illuminated the center, giving the inside a pink and orange glow.

“Hah?! No way was I about to let stupid Deku come and ruin OUR sleep over! This is for me and you ________, no one else….just…us” a light breeze blew in through the open tent flap and treated Katsuki to be briefly overcome by your scent.

The two of you had your scent glands come in around the same time and still weren’t entirely used to it just yet. All both of you knew is that you favored each other’s scents over anyone else’s. It was kind of getting embarrassing how much you were beginning to enjoy your temperamental best friend’s spiced caramel aroma. So much so you had to make a conscious effort not to lean into him and sniff at his neck from time to time. He was subtle about it, but certainly didn’t mind bumping into or brushing up against you more often than ever to get a whiff of your intoxicating fragrance. Even getting hit with a face full just now had his brain feeling sluggish as beads of sweat began forming along his hairline.

A voice inside his head started incessantly growling “touch her, touch her TOUCH HER”. Under the guise of getting comfortable he shifted his leg to rest up against yours and his mind quieted instantly.

“I….I know that Kat…I wouldn’t have invited him anyway!” Your face began to redden as you brazenly blurted out; “I like when it’s just you and I, we always have the most fun”.

He instantly perked up at hearing that, but he couldn’t help but ask; “So you like me better than him? You think I’m BETTER than him?”. Leaning into you as he waited for you to answer his question, eyes narrowed.

“You know I do! Besides….” You couldn’t help yourself as you leaned towards him and inhaled deeply “You smell so much better than him too!”.

Oh hell now you’d done it ________, you unknowingly opened the metaphoric Pandora’s box.

He didn’t speak right away, just smirked back at you and enjoyed the devious expression on your face. After another minute spent invading one another’s personal space you were first to snap out of it quickly muttering; “M’sorry Suki I..I dunno what happened I shouldn’t have got in your face like that!”. You sat back up and moved your leg so it was no longer touching his. Unable to comprehend the sudden feeling of sadness at the loss of contact, or attribute it to the fact that you were no longer touching him. Katsuki frowned immediately and scooted back against you, “S’okay princess…s’not like it’s a big deal”. His use of the familiar nickname only succeeding to fluster you further.

The next few moments were spent in silence.

Surprisingly, It was you that eventually broke it asking; “Suki do you know…d’you know what mates are?”. You immediately began to play with the cheap desk telescope you’d brought out to avoid looking at him, your heart was beating a lot faster now. The startled look on his face would have informed you that your question caught him off gaurd; Surely you hadn’t just had the same thought he did?! Well either that or you could read minds….that wasn’t very likely, thank god.

“Ah well my mom told me it’s when two people decide that they want to always be together and get sad if they are ever apart…so they live together….and then other stuff happens that damn brats don’t need to know just yet” he finished lamely, confused as to why he felt so strange reciting his mother’s words exactly as she’d originally said them.

“I get sad when we have to go inside our houses at night and stop playing together” you said, the depressed tone of voice sounded like it was happening right then. “Me too…I wish we lived together cause then you’d always be with me” he confessed shooting you a nervous glance. Your eyes lit up and you beamed at him when the idea suddenly struck; “We have to become mates now Katsuki, we have to!”. You got up on your knees and began frantically shuffling things around the tiny tent. “If we’re mates then our parents can’t tell us we have to stop playing and separate at night! We’ll always be able to stay together!” Your sporadic movement and sudden outburst immediately infected your companion with the same frantic energy, albeit nervous, but excited all the same as he stared at you with wide eyes.

“You’re right _________! That’s a great idea”

“I know!”

“So uh..umm how uh…how do we do that?”

You stop smoothing the blankets out to stare at Katsuki, “You don’t know how?”.

“No” he admits glumly.

You can’t hold back the distressed whimper that escapes you and Katsuki is immediately at your side trying to console you “Hey princess it’s alright-“. “NO!” you exclaim “We need to do this to stay together forever!”.

Then you remembered something; “I see my mom and dad do this every morning”. You roll up the sleeve of your jacket and bring your wrist up, simulating the motion of rubbing it across the scent gland on your neck. Katsuki nods his head in understanding; “Oh yeah, mine do the same thing! Let’s do that!”. He lays back and stretches his neck out, “You do me first and then I’ll do you kay?”.

“Kay”

You nod and smile down at him, shuffling towards his head and bringing your wrist up to his neck. You hold your breath as your skin makes contact with his and start lightly rubbing over his scent gland a few times.

“S-Shit” he says softly, squirming slightly.

“What?! Did I hurt you??!” You ask.

Fear immediately replacing excitement and distracting you from reprimanding him for uttering a curse word as you usually would.

“N-No it didn’t hurt…please d-do it again”

You do, continuing thoughtlessly as you become enthralled by his peaceful expression and relaxed as he starts purring.

“Your turn”

You take his spot laying down on the fluffy blanket strewn floor, shivering with anticipation and the slight chill in the night air. His touch warms you from the inside out and you gasp at the sudden sensation. Relaxing once more, you look up at him through heavily lidded eyes and return the smile he’s giving you.

Neither one of you has any idea that this situation is going to come with serious consequences.

Eventually you remember the whole reason you two had decided to camp out in the first place; “The shooting stars!” You cry sitting up and narrowly avoiding head butting the blonde boy above you. “Hey!” He snarls. You stand and open the window flap in the tents ceiling, just as you do you see the first “star” shoot across the sky. “Woah! Quick make a wish make a wish kat!”.

He won’t admit it…but he does, and so do you.

As more stars shoot across the sky the two of you lay together; Happily curled up in the blankets, snuggling up together. Occasionally one of you brings your wrist up and begins to rub the others neck lazily, while continuing to watch the dazzling light show taking place above you. Both of you end up falling asleep long before it’s over. The sound of Katsuki’s continuous purring, lulling you into the most comfortable sleep possible.

Well that, and how his natural warmth just seemed to consume you….

Warmth…so warm at times it could get uncomfortable.

Like right now…too close…too hot

Your eyes snap open and you take in your surroundings; This is your dorm room, you’re at school right now, safe. Your clothes and sheets are soaked through with sweat. Not just sweat apparently; After waking up more you realize your lower body feels disgustingly sticky. Then a tingling sensation begins at the tip of your toes, rapidly spreading up your legs until it reaches the special place between them. Then it’s like a literal fucking furnace has exploded down there! Not to mention the heavyweight that has now come to rest in your lower stomach as it begins to cramp.

“Ow! ow! Ow!”

You try to feel around the bed for your phone, you could call one of your friends to come help you.Friends….that’s right they all left for the weekend! Wait not all of them left, Katsuki! He’s still here! That’s right, you were supposed to go over to his room, last night? Is it already morning? Fuck who knows.

You start to cry when you can’t feel your phone nearby on the bed, you don’t wanna look for it.

You don’t wanna be alone either though….Your scared. His room is just down the hall it’s not too far away, maybe if you just take it slow you’ll make it. You force yourself to get up, not even caring that all you have on is a tiny pair of sleep shorts and a sports bra.

You bend down to grab your slides out from beneath the bed and slip them on your feet before moving forward.

One foot in front of the other.

Your hunched over, one arm wrapped around your stomach and sweat freely dribbling down your face, coating your chest, sliding down the valley between your breasts.

Jesus, I must look like fucking shit right now.

As you make it into the hallway and start your journey all you can think about is how badly you want to see Katsuki. He always makes everything better somehow; That smile he wears just for you makes your heart sing normally. Right now you just let out a pained keen at the thought. Your inner omega has always been quiet enough to ignore in the past, but now she’s practically screeching like a fucking banshee inside of your head.

Just one word, over & over & over again:

Alpha

Alpha!

ALPHAAA!!!

With each screech your primal urges and instincts had began overwhelming you. Eventually reaching a point where the lines between the two began to blur. Making you feel more like a wounded beast that’s gone absolutely feral, while slowly dragging yourself down the hallway.

Once you get about halfway down you start to smell the familiar scent that you’ve become so fond of. Only it’s so much stronger and….muskier? It’s intoxicating, and so potent, you need more! Somehow your legs are moving quicker thanks to this new desperation manIfesting. Once you finally reach his door you have to stop yourself from breaking it down; Frantically pounding on it instead, and now you’ve started crying, salivating, and you’re just a goddamn walking train wreck… Somehow you don’t care, your appearance doesn’t matter, you just need HIM right now.

When the door opens you stumble inside.

The sound of his voice quieting your shrieking omega as soon as it reaches your ears;

“Finally decided to show up? Was waiting all fuckin’ night for you and…hey what’s wrong? Oh shit…fuck”.

Fuck is very right.

#katsuki bakugo #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugou x reader #alpha bakugo #alpha bakugou #Katsuki bakugou #bnha omegaverse #omega reader #shorties

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highdramas · 3 years

Text

the world’s a little blurry | b.b.

pairing: bucky barnes x reader

warnings: none

word count: 2107

summary: bucky is home, and he is yours

note: this is a one shot for now, but i definitely have more ideas for these two <3 this’ll be heavily inspired by tfatws so this is a spoiler warning for anything mentioned! also this is my first time writing bucky so pleaseeeeee give me some mercy lol

enjoy! <3

it’s nearly three in the morning, and you’re lucky if you stay up past midnight, so bucky makes a point to be quiet as he tiptoes into the apartment. after a mission gone awry in the apartment building where you had been neighbors, you’ve been staying with the superhero. something about not losing you and you’re safest here. bucky’s not stupid— caring about someone is a gamble, and it had become clear to his enemies who exactly it was that he cared about.

living with you came lots of things that bucky was not expecting. first off, you’re very cluttered. you call it controlled chaos, he calls it a mess. he’s fascinated by the state of your night stand, mostly. a dying plant and one loose airpod, two half empty water bottles, an empty starbucks cup.

second off, you have a cat. her name is katherine, but you call her kitty, occasionally kiki. and while bucky had been determined not to get attached, after awhile, it was difficult not to. she rubbed up on his legs, cuddled in his lap on the couch, slept on his chest in the middle of the night. she’s fucking adorable, and not even the winter soldier can deny that.

third off… you. you as a whole. he’s sure that it would’ve been a shock living with anyone, but the care that you give him… he’s not used to having someone making sure he’s eating. he’s not used to someone checking up on him throughout the day. he’s not used to having someone to come home to.

it’s nice.

it feels safe.

and he’ll kill anyone who tries to take this peace away from him.

bucky groans as he shucks his jacket off, feeling exactly where his muscles ache. he tries to keep his volume minimal. finally, he opens the door to the bedroom. the bedroom that you share.

this was the biggest adjustment of all.

he’d barely slept in a bed at all before you came along. too soft, too comfortable. he told you as much that first night, and what you had said shocked him.

“well, i’ll just sleep on the floor with you.”

no, oh, just get in bed. no, c’mon, it’s nice. none of those things. just understanding.

but it was more than understanding. it was meeting him exactly where he was.

that was three months ago, and you had kept your word. if you weren’t sleeping on the floor with him, you were on the couch with your hand tangling down, brushing along his hair, his shoulder. every time he felt you bucky swore that he could cry.

it was two months ago that he suggested you both sleep in the bed. and while it wasn’t every night, and some nights he padded out to the living room with a blanket and pillow… it was progress.

and he would wake up to find that you had joined him on the floor.

the nightmares weren’t gone. he’s not sure if they ever would be. but they were growing few and farer between, and the ones he did have were growing more manageable.

things were getting better.

of course, they were not perfect. and he knew that you didn’t expect them to be. he has therapy once a week, sometimes twice during the particularly hard weeks. he’s grown close with sam and his family. and… you.

his girl.

as the door creaks open, he almost chuckles at the sight of you. you’re laying horizontally across the bed, taking up both your side and bucky’s. katherine is curled in at your chest, her nose nearly touching yours. your mouth is open and he can see that there’s a bit of drool in the corner of your mouth, and that does make him laugh. it stirs you and he freezes.

bucky watches as you slowly wake, rubbing the sleep from your eyes, and then rubbing the drool from your mouth. “ew,” you mumble, still half asleep, and bucky leans in the doorway wearing a smirk.

“go back to sleep, doll.”

you hum and stretch, and so does katherine, giving a wide yawn. “you’re home.”

home.

had he ever had a home before?

he did once, as a child. a time that feels so distant, so separate from the life that he leads now. sometimes, it’s hard to even picture the faces of his family members.

he had this apartment, but it never felt like home. not until you waltzed into it with your clutter and your laughter and your vibrancy. not until you cooked dinner hip to hip, not until you listened to music that he had never heard of, not until you watched some movie that was your favorite.

you’re home.

bucky smiles and he nods, sitting on the edge of the bed, pushing your hair back. “i’m home,” he says quietly. “i’m sorry i’m so late.”

you shake your head, your hand taking his. he still wears the gloves. you raise your eyebrows at him. “can i?”

he nods. you make quick work of removing each of his gloves, tossing them across the room, which makes bucky smile. he knows he’ll be picking those up in the morning. you press a kiss to his palm, the one that is flesh and bone. and then you take the other and do the same. “missed you, buck.”

something in his heart constricts as he watches you-- washed in moonlight that comes in through the window, sleepy smile on your face, eyes fixed on him. he knows that look, and he knows what it means. he doesn’t know if he deserves it, but he tries. he’ll always try for you.

“i wasn’t even gone twenty four hours,” the smirk is evident in his tone even if you can’t see it, but you scoff and roll your eyes. “i think you’re needy.”

“needy!” you repeat and laugh, falling back onto the pillow. kitty stirs and looks up at bucky, letting out a loud meow. “she’s the needy one. look at her.”

“both of you.” he scratches kitty’s head and then kisses the top of yours before he stands again. “i’m gonna shower.”

sleep is escaping you and you push yourself up onto your palms. “can i join you?”

he chews on the inside of his cheek and shrugs his shoulders innocently. “better pick up the pace then, soldier.”

with a laugh, you kick the sheets off of you. “yes sir.”

he rolls his eyes and you both shuffle into the bathroom. now, in the light, you’re able to get a good look at him. and your jaw drops slightly at what you see. “bucky,” you say and he already knows what’s coming. you touch the side of his face where a bruise is blossoming. “how the hell does this even happen?”

“part of the gig.”

you groan and he smiles and he does so because he loves you. he loves your mess and he loves your doting, he loves your cat and he loves coming home to see that you’ve taken up the entire bed. “you’re an old man. one of these days you’re gonna have to retire.”

“got unfinished business first.”

you know of his past. of course you do. although, you’re a firm believer that it’s not his past, rather than a past that was decided for him against his will. you’ve made a point of making your stance in that clear. you have heard stories of what bucky has done, but you have tutted and shaken your head. “what hydra did.”

these are the things that bucky tells himself, but it is different to hear it from someone else. someone who is not steve, or sam, or another avenger who has also committed morally grey acts. because, yes, they are all good and trustworthy and worth listening to-- but you. you are his girl. you are his girl who laughs at his jokes and teases him and never once babies him for what happened to him, but you’re also the girl who has woken him from nightmares, who has tended to his wounds, who has been held back from a fight just to defend his honor. you have seen him in his entirety, and you have never balked.

“alright, well--” it’s not lost on you how his eyes trail down your body as you undress, turning on the water and checking the temperature. “as soon of this business of yours is finished…”

“i know.”

the two of you share a look and he gives a crooked grin. “you look nice.”

“there’s dried drool on my face.”

“yeah, i know.”

it’s been nearly a year since you met james buchanan barnes and yet he still gets you to blush. he practically lights up at the sight of the color on your cheeks. “are you--”

“shut up and get in the shower,” you retort, pulling back the curtain and stepping into the steaming water.

“yes, ma’am.” you hear the shuffling of his clothes falling to the floor and then he is behind you, hands going up and down your arms. you let out a sigh and tilt your head back, peering up at him. water trails down his nose, dripping off and onto your forehead.

you don’t tell bucky, but you do worry. you worry every second that he’s gone on a mission. you know that you don’t have to say it, that he knows. and you trust that he will come home to you. bucky turns you and he holds your face in his hands and he presses his lips to yours and you know that he feels the same way.

i’ll always come back is spelled out in the way that he kissed you, the way that he holds the back of your head. we have forever is heaved from your lungs as he sucks the air from you.

when you part, you smile at his lips-- slightly swollen, pinker than normal. you rub your thumb along the bottom one and he catches your hand. he presses it on his chest, right where his heart hides beneath skin and bone. “you don’t have to do all of this to make up for what they did to you,” you say over the sound of water. “you’re allowed to have a normal life, if you want it.”

“i know.” he pushes a piece of wet hair from your face. “i just don’t--” he shakes his head and you know this all too well-- he doesn’t quite know what to say, he starts closing up and off and away, the high walls that guard his heart and mind beginning to take shape. “i feel like if i don’t… what was it all for?”

delicate hands move across his torso. you lather up a loofah and begin washing away blood and grime. “bucky,” you say and he looks at you, steely blue eyes staring right into yours. “you make people happy. you have people who love you, who care for you. you don’t owe the world reparations.”

he winces as you go over a particular bruise and you slow your movements, make them featherlight. “all i know is,” you begin. “whatever it is you want, whatever it is that fulfills your life… make sure it’s for you.”

a smile curls on his face and he stills your hands. “thank you.” he takes the loofah from you. “let me get you.”

“but i’m not done--”

“please. let me.”

you surrender and he begins to wash you, and your forehead falls to his shoulder, calm washing over your body. you could’ve been standing there for minutes or hours, you’re unsure. he pushes your hair back and at some point you realize that he is washing your hair, and you press gently open mouthed kisses against his chest and you hear his breath catch and you fall in love with him all over again.

“let me get yours--” you mumble around a yawn and you watch as he smirks down at you. “really, let me.”

bucky shakes his head and he turns the water off. “tomorrow,” he says.

you towel off and when you clamber into bed, you feel the weight of him beside you, your cat nestled between the both of you. you feel him pull you into him, his breath against your neck and his lips against your pulse point, and your eyes flutter shut. before sleep captures you, you murmur, “i love you, james bucky barnes.”

the feeling of his smile against your skin is imprinted on your heart, and his words coax you into sleep-- “i love you too, doll.”

bucky barnes sleeps through the night and doesn’t wake once.

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky x you #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes fanfic #my writing #the world's a little blurry #eeeee i'm so excited to post thissssss

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rezzyromance · 3 years

Note

Idk if this is how you request things or if it's just asking, BUT-

How would the Lords react to an S/O that's usually the chillest person that you will ever meet (not to be confused with a pushover because they are not), they've never seen them even mildly annoyed when something bad happens. But then something happens and, turns out, the S/O is utterly TERRIFYING when they're mad.

Hope this makes sense!

Aw man I'm gonna feel awful scaring Moreau and Donna :(

Alcina

You're relaxing on a beautiful morning. The sun is shining through the window just enough to warm the room but not hurt your eyes. You hadn't even changed out of your sleep wear. "How are you feeling, my dear?", a sweet voice rang from the doorway. You were sitting in your favorite chair near the window. You turn and smile at her. She walks over and rubs your face in her large hand before leaning down and giving you a soft kiss. "I'm feeling amazing. And you?", you grab her hand before she pulls it away and you place a kiss on her knuckles. "I'm feeling alright. There's a new maid here. She's a bit slow. I'm giving her until tonight to finish dusting the entire castle or else she won't see another sunrise." It was almost comedic how dark her words were as you both stared out the window and gazed at the beautiful scenery. "Come on Alcina.", you stand up and place your hands on hers, trying to hold them despite the size difference. "Give the girl a break. It's a huge castle AND it's her first day.", you knew your words would probably change nothing. Alcina was rather cruel, but you looked past it. You tried your best to make the nervous maids comfortable whenever they arrive.

"We'll see how she does." She gives you one more kiss before leaving the room. You sit back down in your chair, enjoying the warmth of the sun for a little while longer. You lose track of time, minutes maybe even hours go by. Suddenly, there's a crash not far from the door. You jump and stand up, no longer comfortable after being startled. "What in the name of Mother Miranda?!", you leave the room and look down the hallway. The new maid stood there with a terrified look on her face. In front of her was one of the paintings Alcina had on her walls, now with a broken frame and a hole punctured. Your blood began to boil. It was a painting of you, her, and the girls all together. It was your favorite. "How in the hell did you manage to do that?!", you begin to stomp towards her. She cowers and struggles to find her words. "I-I-I was just dusting! It fell and I-I didn't mean t-", you cut her off. "How the fuck did you knock such a large painting over just by dusting?! DO YOU THINK YOU'RE ALLOWED TO MAKE SUCH STUPID MISTAKES HERE?!", you unravel. "I-I didn't mean to! I'm sorry!", she almost begins to weep. "SORRY ISN'T GONNA SAVE YOUR ASS!"

"MISS DIMITRESCU PLEASE HELP!", she cries out. You freeze, realizing that the lady herself is right behind you. You turn to face her. Her eyes are wide with shock. She has never seen you like this before and never even knew you had this type of side to you. She was impressed as much as she was terrified. "(Y/N)? Are you alright my love?" She had no idea what to do as your seething slowed down. "Why don't you go back to the room, yes? Settle down a little and deal with her later.", she places a hand on your back helps walk with you back to the room. Once you're there, she bends down to whisper in your ear. "I don't know where this side of you has been this whole time, but I am so amazed by you. And also a little frightened."

Donna

The Beneviento house was usually a calm place despite its creepy aura. You and Donna are both quiet and chill people. Never once have you fought or even raised your voices at each other. It was pleasant.

You had planned a nice dinner for the both of you. You wanted to try out a new recipe and surprise her, so you made your way to the kitchen to get started. "Okay, what first? I guess I'll need a pot.", you go rummaging through the kitchen and you find the pots stacked within each other inside one of the top cabinets. You groan and stand up on your toes, grazing the pots with your fingers. It didn't take much to cause them to tumble down, crashing on top of you with a loud sound that followed. "Aw shit.", you sighed and picked up the knocked over pots. A small but annoying pain began to throb in your head from where it made contact with a pot. What you didn't notice was you forgot to pick one of the pots up. It remained unnoticed. "It's fine.", you say to yourself as you maintain your composure. Next, a cutting board and knife. You turn around and begin to walk forward to find the cutting board, but you slam your toe into counter. You wince in pain and grab your foot. "SON OF A BITCH!", you yell.

You calm yourself, still wanting to have a pleasant meal with Donna. "Alright. Everything's fine." You step forward and kick the pot that you had forgotten to pick up. It caused your freshly kicked toe to ache even more. "OH COME ON! GOD FUCKING DAMMIT!", you scream and swear as you throw your arms up in pure rage and shock.

"...(Y/N)?", a gentle voice whispered from the doorway, causing you to whip your head in that direction. It was Donna. She looked absolutely horrified and almost looked like she could cry. "Is.. is everything... are you alright?", she worried. "Yes. I'm sorry. Just got a little pissed off.", you took a deep breath to calm yourself down, feeling bad for scaring the poor girl.

Moreau

You were sitting on the dock together, looking into the water as your feet swung back and forth above it. It was a sunny day and you two decided to spend it outside. Your hand slowly made its way over to his. His feet stopped swinging for a second as you entangled your fingers. "I don't know what I'd do without you, (Y/N)." his words were bitter sweet as a gentle smile formed from his lips. "Oh, Sal. You don't have to think like that. I'll always be here for you.", you kiss his cheek and continue to relax as you sway your legs.

"There it is! There's the beast!", a voice yelled from not so far away. You both look in the direction of the voice and see a few young village boys. Possibly between the ages of 13 and 16. Moreau had become some what of a scary story for the villagers. A tale that kids spread on school court yard and bring up during dares. But, you've never seen a kid brave enough to actually make it far enough into the reservoir to actually see Moreau. Now, there were about 3. All of them stood and pointed, shocked and terrified.

"Hey beast! Come get me!", one kid teases. You glare at the kids as a newfound rage begins to boil inside you. "Let's go back inside.", Moreau says before standing up from the doc. The sadness in his voice was heartbreaking. Suddenly, one of the children gathers the guts to pick up a rock and throw it as hard as he could. His aim was off, but not by much. It slammed into the wood near Moreau's feet, startling him. "Take that you devil!", he laughs. "THAT'S IT YOU LITTLE SHIT!", you begin sprinting in the direction of the immature brats. Two of them run from the direction they came from while the one who threw the rock was frozen in fear. You took the opportunity to grab him by the collar of his shirt. "Listen here you little waste of space. I'm gonna give you 3 seconds to turn around and run for your goddamn life. If you or any of your little snot-nosed friends come around here again, they'll be goddamn fish food. Do you understand?" The kid was too scared to speak and instead began to nod rapidly. You let him go and watched as he ran as fast as he could, screaming the whole way.

You walk back to the shack and find Moreau standing in the same place he was when you took off. His mouth was agape and he looked almost as scared as the kids. "You alright Sal? I made sure those little shits won't be coming around here anymore." "Yeah... I didn't know you could be so... scary", he says. "I'm sorry. But those kids were being cruel. I had to do something.", you say. "Well... it was awesome!", he smiled. "But also very scary!" You laugh which helps sooth him a little.

Heisenberg

"Screw driver.", is all Karl said with an outstretched palm. He was working on some type of mechanical heart for his experiments. He wanted you to lend a "helping hand" even though he could easily do it all by himself. He did this because he wanted to be around you, he was just too stubborn with too big of an ego to simply say it. So here you were, handing him every little tool he asks for.

"Do you want the big one or the little one?", you say with a hint of boredom in your tone. "Aw c'mon don't sound like that! Isn't this exciting? It's like you're working on it with me! Also, hand me the big one.", you do as he says and hand him the big screw driver. "I just don't get it. You literally have powers. You can easily do this by yourself and have been for so long. Why do you need me to help?" He pauses for a second and looks over towards you, his brow slightly furrowed. "I don't NEED you to help. I just thought it would be nice for you to help out. Plus, you're the one always bitching about me constantly working. Well, here you are! Helping me work! So, either suck it up or you can leave." His harshness had no real ill will in it. He was just confused and a bit too ignorant to consider his words. But, he was testing your patience. He continued to use the screwdriver until handing it to you without saying a word.

"Hand me a screw.", he demanded with his hand facing palm up again. "Which size?" "They're all the same sizes, dumbass." You feel your blood begin to boil. "They're different fucking sizes! This one is smaller than this one!", you hold up two screws that are obviously different sizes. This makes Karl angry. Not because you were right, but because you seemed upset over something that seemed so insignificant.

"If you came here just to yap in my ear, then I don't think I need your assistance.", he huffed. You put the selection of tools and supplies he was making you hold on the table he is working on and ball your fists. "You're the one who told me to do this in the first place!", you yell. "Yeah, because you won't stop bitching! Non-stop you're always compla-" you cut him off before he can finish. "SHUT UP!", you yell. The room goes silent. "YOU SAY I'M BITCHING? HAVE YOU HEARD YOURSELF? JESUS FUCKING CHRIST KARL YOU BITCH AND MOAN ALL THE TIME! I'M DONE TAKING SHIT FROM YOU!" He wanted to be angry, but he couldn't. He felt something much more overwhelming. Was he.. intimidated? He didn't move from his seat. All he could do was look up at you with a confused expression. What now? What is there to do? If he pushes you further, what would happen? He was actually too scared to find out.

You take a deep breath to calm down before speaking. "Now, if you want me to help with your shit, I'll stay as long as you keep your mouth shut. Can you possibly manage to do that?" He gulps nervously. "Yes ma'am."

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venomous--fics · 3 years

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@geekgirlofarchangels Requested: Hi! (I just wanted to say that I love your writing, it's amazing)😍

Can I request Eddie Brock x reader, who bake sweets for him, basically try to show her love for him in many ways in a day to day basis, and when she decides to tell him that she loves him, she sees him with Anne and misunderstand everything.

She panics, but ends fluff? Sorry for any mistakes English is not my first language

A/N: No worries!! Thank you for the request and I hope you enjoy!! Day 6! So many more to go!

"I think I need better piping tips." You said, looking over to Eddie for some reassurance.

The man had a one track mind, and right now, the only thing he could think of was the cookies you had in the oven. He's been staring at it for the last five minutes.

"A watched pot never boils." You said, finally catching his attention.

"And watched cookies never bake." he retorted turning around to look at the cake you'd be decorating, "I think it looks nice."

"Really?"

"Of course!"

"You're not just being cute and nice, right?"

"What would I gain from lying? Name one thing."

"More sweets?"

"That is true, but I don't have to lie to get those."

You rolled your eyes with a smile as you moved the cake to the other counter so that way you had room for the cookies. Before you, Eddie wasn't really the type of guy to have a sweet tooth, but oh boy you sure did change that. You worked at a bakery, and you were still practicing your skills any chance you got.

Eddie was a good and somewhat unbiased judge. He never lied to you, but he was never mean about anything either. If something needed worked on, he'd tell you nicely.

"Why are you stressing so much about your decorating skills anyways? I think you're amazing at it."

"My boss really wants me to start helping out in the decorating area..I was just worried that I was totally going to suck." You set your piping bag off to the side and wiped off your hands, "I just want to make sure I can do everything perfectly."

"You got this. It'll be a breeze for you. I mean, c'mon, look at it. It's really good."

You took a moment to really admire your cake. Yeah, it was pretty good.

Eddie really was so nice and loving to you. He was nothing like any of the other people you'd chosen to spend your time with before. Eddie actually wanted to do things with you, and he was constantly dragging you along for new adventures, and actually paid attention to your wants and needs.

You really liked him. Well, if you were being honest, you were really hopelessly in love with him. And you wanted to tell him, and you were sure he felt the same, but you really wanted to make it special.

Should you write it in icing on a cookie? Or maybe he was a bit tired of cookies. Maybe he'd expect you to do that since you're a baker and all. Maybe you should just tell him. Face to face.

You both left for work, saying your goodbyes and sharing a kiss or two. You were going to tell him after work. It'd finally be a weight off your chest to finally say just how you felt.

Despite having a seemingly normal day, you began to feel a little puzzled towards lunch. Normally, somehow, someway, Eddie always found his way to your work. It was bizarre how your lunch breaks always lined up, but you were sure he did that on purpose.

He didn't show up today, so you spent your break alone. You'd texted him to have a good rest of the day at work, but he never texted back. Maybe he just got busy, you told yourself.

You managed to clock out and make your way home, and still no response from Eddie. He wasn't even home yet. It was 6:45. Normally, he's home way before you. You shrugged it off as a late day at the office as you changed out of your work clothes.

Eddie got home at about 7:15 pm, and didn't say much as to why that was. He was his normal cheery self. He doted on you as usual, and you two ate together. Every thing was fine, but it didn't feel fine.

Things continued on like that for a few days. You had this persistent nagging feeling that Eddie was hiding something, and it was getting in the way of talking to him. It was getting far too annoying to ignore.

Today, one of your rare days off, you decided to hell with it. You were going to make Eddie a nice dinner and just tell him. Maybe then the nagging feeling would go away. Maybe you were just nervous because this was a huge thing to say, especially to Eddie.

You were making your way downtown, to the store, to pick up a few ingredients for dinner. Your list was short, so this really shouldn't take too long. You walked passed a café that you and Eddie frequented, and your body froze just a few steps passed the big front window. The hell was that?

You must've been seeing things. Surely you hadn't seen what you thought you saw, right? Not wanting to be seen, just in case your eyes weren't tricking you, you turned your body a little. You couldn't believe it. There was was. Even if all you saw was the back of his head, you knew it was him solely because of who was sitting across from him at the little table.

"Anne?" you asked yourself quietly.

She looked like she was in good spirits today. Her smile was warm and inviting as always, and it looked like she was chuckling at something Eddie had just said. You couldn't look away.

Why would he do this to you? Are you really surprised? After all, he did love her first. Maybe he never really loved you to begin with.

You made your way back to the apartment to gather your thoughts. There was to be a rational explanation for this. They weren't doing anything bad, but, you did find yourself worrying because...Well, you know, it was Anne.

For the first time in years, you felt angry. How could he do that to you? You should just leave and just call him later and tell him that you're never coming back. You froze halfway to the door once you realized what had really happened. Eddie chose her. And you knew that time after time he'd do it again.

You felt stupid. You felt a few tears slip out and you tried to fight them off, but that only seemed to make it worse. The door opened, and the sound of keys hitting the counter caught your attention.

"Oh!" Eddie said, "You're home! Good, I have- Hey, are you okay?"

You just stared at him.

He walked over, attempting to comfort you, but you took a few steps back, causing him to freeze. He looked wounded.

"Did something happen?" he asked, lowering his hands.

"I don't know," You said bitterly, "Why don't you go ask Anne?"

"Anne?" Then it registered, "Oh! Oh, no, babe, that's-"

"I don't want to hear any excuses, Eddie! How could you do that to me? How could you string me along and then just backstab me like that."

"No!" He really wanted to hold you, but he knew he had to refrain, "No, no, no! It wasn't like that. I swear!"

"I can't even look at you." You rushed into the bedroom, slamming the door. "God! I'm so, so stupid!"

Eddie listened to your slightly muffled yelling for a minute or two before moving over to the door to open it.

"I shouldn't even be here anymore!" You shouted, throwing open the door, "I have to go."

You tried to move past Eddie, but as a reflex, he grabbed your arm, "Please don't do that."

You tugged and pulled, but you couldn't wiggle free. He wasn't holding too tight, and he wasn't hurting you. You just couldn't get free, "Let go of me!"

"I swear I'd never do that to you!" He pleaded, "Will you just let me explain?"

You stopped fighting and just stared helplessly ahead, "What is there to explain, huh? You don't love me like I love you, so there's nothing left to talk about."

"You love me?"

"Of course I do! But it's obvious that you don't love me! So, just, let go!"

"I love you too!" He said loudly.

It's like the whole world stopped in that moment as your head whipped around to look at him. He looked like his whole world was about to end. This wasn't how any of this was supposed to go down.

"I love you." he repeated, "I- I'm so sorry I didn't say it sooner. I..I got nervous so I, as stupid as it sounds, I went to Anne for advice."

Your whole body relaxed as you listened to him.

"I wasn't sure how to say it- Or, I guess, say it right." Eddie sighed a little, "I asked her what I should do. She was always better at this stuff. She gave me this bright idea of a movie and dinner...But it seems like that's all out the window now."

You realized your mistake, "Eddie, I'm sorry...I didn't want it to happen like this either. I had a plan too, and I guess I ruined it."

"I should've just told you. I was just scared you wouldn't feel the same."

"Wouldn't feel the same?" You wanted to sound offended at the thought, "Eddie, why do you think I do all these nice things for you? I wanted to tell you for ages, but I just couldn't."

Eddie let go of your arm, and pulled you into a hug. He hugged you like his life depended on it. You hugged back before sighing, "This really isn't how I wanted this to go."

"I know." he said, "Doesn't make it any less true, does it?"

You shook your head.

"I mean it. I really do love you. I just wanted to make sure I did everything right this time." He sounded disappointed with himself, "I guess I'm always going to screw some things up."

"That's okay." You reassured, "I don't know if you noticed, but I ruined this whole thing. Your plan, my plan. All of it."

"I wouldn't say ruined." Eddie pulled back to look at you, "I'd just say this was a little out of the ordinary."

"Do you still want to go out for dinner? Is that still in the cards?" You asked curiously.

"Of course. Why don't we just take a breather for a little bit."

#eddie brock x reader #eddie brock imagine #marvel imagine #marvel x reader #venom imagine #venom x reader

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emf005 · 3 years

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I'm Trying

Here is my weekly post! I hope you guys enjoy, this is a personal fave of mine. Please let me know what you think of it! I love to get feedback!

Marauders Era

Sirius Black x Fem! Reader, Remus x Twin sister! Reader. Marauders x Reader

Warnings: Swearing, mini make out sesh, sort of self harm, fear

You stole a piece of chocolate from your stash. You always had a secret stash in case you brother, Remus, ever ran out before the full moon. But you also had a bit of a sweet tooth yourself. Well, you could call it more than that actually. See, while your brother was a full werewolf, you were about half, but he didn’t know that. If he knew that he would actually lose it. The only person who knew was Lily, and she had found out by accident.

So, while your brother would always turn into a werewolf on full moons, you only sometimes did. You also got mood swings to the max. But no one ever questioned it because they assumed it was just girl stuff. And the four boys you hung out with, no matter how close you were, didn’t really want to strike up a conversation about that. Ever.

You see, your turning started your second year at Hogwarts. You woke in the forbidden Forest feeling like you had been hit with a ten ton bus. You put two and two together and started to ask Lily’s friend, Severus, if he could brew you a potion in secret. So I guess you could say two people knew. But it wasn’t like Severus would tell on you. You were always nicer to him than your friends were and he seemed to appreciate that. So, he always made you a potion while slughorn made Remus his.

James often asked why you never joined them. While your brother couldn;t become an animagus, you could for some odd reason. You turned into a small black and white ferret, while your brother couldn;t change at all. You felt bad, it was your fault he was like this, and despite his countless times he had told you it wasn’t your fault you both knew it was. But everytime James would ask Remus would answer for you.

“I don;t want her out there. I’m her brother. It's my job to protect her. I wouldn;t be able to live with myself if I accidentally did something to her.” You always clenched your jaw at his response. He still saw you as a little kid, despite being his twin. You couldn’t stand it!

You never thought anyone noticed these secret feelings you held against your brother. Oh how you were wrong. Sirius Black always noticed when Remus would say something to upset you. And he was always the one there for you. See, despite his liking for it, he had caught feelings for you. He thought he could trample them by asking out every girl in the school, but that only seemed to make his want for you grow. But he never said anything. You were his best friend’s twin sister. It was just wrong, no matter how strongly he felt for you.

The full moon was coming up again soon, and you ran down the hall to see your brother and friends waiting for you. Remus looking in his bag frantically.

“Hey, guys!” You smiled with fake cheer. You felt awful today, but you couldn;t let anyone see that. They might grow suspicious of your secret. “What's wrong, Rem?”

“He didn’t restock his backpack again with chocolate.” Peter squeaked. Remus threw him a dirty glance before rooting through his bag again. You internally groaned. You always had a stash in your bag, and you really needed it today. But, you were his sister. Sacrifices must be made. You slung your bag around and grabbed your whole stash and filled his bag with it. You even let him finish the one you had been munching on, much to your disappointment.

“Thank you, Y/N/N,” he said, stuffing the chocolate bar in his mouth. You just smiled at him and put your head down and clutched your messenger bag harder. White knuckling the strap. God, you wanted to rip the chocolate out of his mouth and just eat it. But no. You were a fucking good sister. And a fucking good sister you would stay.

Classes were a pain all day, especially with the smell of chocolate enveloping you every time Remus would open a new package. You had broken four quills by lunch and they were all joking about it.

You all headed out of your final class and down to the great hall, like you normally did. BUt Remus seemed to be in an even worse mode. You were glad he had the chocolate, he might’ve actually murdered someone. You, on the other hand, were so close to murder, but you had to keep that damn smile on and your shirt pulled up high onto your shoulder tightly, despite the heat. That's where Greyback had gotten you. Just a nip on the shoulder before remus thought it was a good idea to attempt to hit him with a chair. Key word, attempt.

Remus was on the end of the line bsides you. Some slytherin accidently knocked into him and he let out a growl as he kept walking and talking to the Huffelpuff. Here we go.

“You got a problem?” He whipped around, staring at the boy clad in green robes. The boy looked at him confused. You recognize him. Your year, Jacob Jemesky. One of the cutest boys in your year. I mean, his eyes alone were perfect enough.

“I’m sorry?” He asked. You put a hand on Remus’s shoulder.

“Rem,” but he shook you off and walked up to the boy.

“I said, you got a problem, Snake?”Your eyes widened and you became red faced. You walked over to him and pulled him away from the Slytherin, shoving him to SIrius and James who held him back and tried to get hima away from the situation.

“I am so sorry about that, Jacob, right?” You nodded a smile on his lips.

“Yeah. And no worries. Your, Y/N, right?” You blushed slightly.

“Yeah. Its nice to finally meet you. We’ve shared a few classes I think.” He nodded before his eyes flashing back to your brother.

“Is he alright? I really didn’t mean to-”

“He’s fine. Trust me. He just gets moody from here and there. I think its like a twin thing between me and him, knowing when one is going to have a bad day and all.” He nodded.

“Well, I have to get going, but I’ll see you around, Y/N.” He waved and started to leave.

“See you around!” You waved back. Your smile dropped as soon as he turned the corner. You took a few deep breaths and walked over to your brother who was still trying to get out of James and Siris’ grips. “You two can let go now.” The boys did as you said but were ready to grab him at any second.

“What the hell was that for, Y/N?” He shouted at you, making your back straighten, ready to take it all. He just had to yell at someone sometimes, and the majority of the time it was you.

“He didn’t do it on purpose, Rem. You know that. You just need to calm down for a second, ok?”

“Calm down? I am calm!” James went to say something but you just shook your head at him. You weren’t going to let them take any of this heat.

“Rem, you're really not. Please just-”

“Don;t tell me what to do, Y/N! I am sick of you trying to constantly manage every little thing that I do. You can’t even begin to understand what I go through! You have no right to tell me to calm down. Or to tell me what I am and what I’m not. You know why? Because I am a fucking werewolf becuase of you,” every bit of air was sucked out of the empty corridor. Luckily empty. But he didn’t stop there. “I took that bite for you! We both know it was your fault! You were too naive to even think for a second that it wasn;t smart to go outside that early in the morning when the moon was still out! It was all yoru fucking fault! So don;t tell me what to do, or how to feel or any of that, because this is all happening because of you!”

You stood frozen as his breath calmed. You had tears slipping down your cheeks which was a strange sight for everyone in your friend group. Yo never cried. But hearing Remus admit that it was your fault, you couldn’t handle it anymore. The dam just broke. You swallowed, trying to get the lump in your throat away.

“Are you better, Remus?” He just stared at you, his eyes turning from rage to fear as he heard what he had said and how you referred to him as Remus and not Rem or bro or some stupid nickname you had given him. You smiled sadly and wiped a tear away. “I’m glad. I’m glad that finally admitting the truth makes you feel better.” You turned and started to walk down the hall only to stop and look over your shoulder. “You know. I just have to say this because I have for a while now. I have always tried my best to be there for you. Always tried to be patient. Always tried to take care of you when you wouldn’t let me do more. And also, I’m not the bloody moron who hit Fenrir Greyback with a chair and didn’t have the arm strength for it and ended up falling out a window!” You spit at him before walking down the hallway, tears streaming down your face at this point.

Remus opened his mouth to call after you, but he saw Sirius bolting after you instead. He had fucked up majorly. He knew it. James took him by the shoulder and directed him towards the Great Hall. James being the only one who knew of Sirius’ crush on you and knowing that Sirius would be able to calm you down better than any of them. And if he couldn’t, then Remus had just gotten himself into a deep deep deep hole.

You sat in the small alcove you had found your first year. It was in a secluded part of the courtyard, only your lily and Sirius knew about it. Which sucked because they knew exactly where to look for you.

Your head was in your knees and silent tears continued to pour down your face and on your knees. You didn’t know what to do. Didn’t know how to feel. You just didn’t know.

“Y/N?” You looked up to see Sirius standing by the entrance of the alcove. He had pushed aside the vines that hid you from view and was watching you, waiting to see what you would do. You sat up quickly and brushed the tears aside, smiling at him.

“Hey, Sirius,” your voice cracked and you cringed. He gave you a small pitiful smile and made you move over so he was sitting next to you. “Is he ok?”

“He will be,” you sighed and rubbed your hands over your face.

“I shouldn’t have stormed off. Or said any of that,” Sirius frowned.

“You know Moony is my best friend, but he started that argument.”

“Yeah but with the full moon coming up… he’s just on edge, and I know that. And he was right, I just didn’t expect him to say it like that. I over reacted.”

“You were just helping out a Slytherin, who you obviously like,” he hit your shoulder and you laughed, you felt your shirt fall down a bit off your shoulder but didn;t go to move it.

“I just find him attractive. That was the first time I've talked to him.” Sirius smiled through his pain and laughed with you. His eyes fell to your shoulder for a moment and he froze.

“Y/N/N, what happened?” He questioned looking at the small mark that the werewolf had left all those years ago. Your eyes widened and you quickly pulled your sleeve back up and cleared your throat standing.

“No-nothing. Um… I-I have to-to… uh.. To go. I’ll-I’ll see you, Sirius. Thank you,” you scurried out of alcove and dashed through the halls. You knew you couldn’t avoid him for long. I mean, the four of them had the marauders map, they would find you anywhere you went. You walked into the Great Hall, thankful to see Lily sitting by James. “Lily!” She looked over at you and her smile fell when she saw the state you were in. She excused herself and came running up to you, leading you out the Hall and to your room.

“Are you ok? James told me the blow out-”

“Sirius saw the scar,” you interrupted her. She froze.

“Does he know?” You shook your head.

“No. But I know he’s going to question me as soon as I’m alone. I just didn't want that to happen.”

“Not yet, you mean.”

“Ever.” She sighed, but didn’t push the subject. She was adamant that you should tell the boys about your… condition. You were adamant that you keep it to yourself, forever.. The fights between you and your twin would get worse, and you couldn’t let that happen.

Sirius walked into the Great Hall, scanning the Gryffindor table for you, he came up empty. He sat down, but kept searching the hall and glancing at the doors every now and then.

“What wrong, Mate?” James asked, taking a bite of his sandwich. Even Remus was eating, slowly, but eating.

“Nothing,” he mumbled and took a banana from the table. If you acted like that around him when he saw that scar, he could only imagine you didn’t want anyone else knowing about it. “Do you have the map?” James nodded and handed over the map from his pocket.

Quickly, Sirius unfolded it and searched for your name. You were in the girls dormitory with Lily. His leg started to bounce while he considered going after you. He could always ask Lily if he could have a second with you. He just wanted to make sure you were alright. You seemed really upset when you stormed out.

Had you always worn long sleeves of some sort?

He handed the map back to James before standing up and heading towards the Gryffindor dorms. Maybe he could lure you out with some chocolate. He knew you were addicted to the stuff, practically eating it for breakfast, lunch and dinner, but you always gave your stash to your brother. Some days he wished you wouldn’t. Just because he noticed how you would stiffen at the smell of it, or when you heard a wrapper from your stash being un-did. He knew Remus needed it, but it seemed like you sometimes needed it just as much as he did.

He bumped into LIly in the common room, he opened his mouth but she held up a hand to silence him.

“Listen, I know you want to check on her. But she isn’t in the best state right now. Especially if you are going to be questioning her about what you saw.”

“I just want to make sure she’s alright. I won’t question her about it.” Lily bit her lip and thought about it for a moment before shaking her head. You had given the last of your chocolate stash to Remus the other day and were in desperate need. But she didn’t want to leave you alone with Sirius in the dorm. He knew how to get into the girl’s dormitory, no shock there, but seldom did it. And normally only did it to bug the hell out of you.

“I’m sorry. It really isn’t the best decision. I have to run out and get her more chocolate from the kitchens, the house elves keep a stash for her down there. Please, don’t go in.”

“I can grab some from Remus’ stash,” he offered. But she shook her head.

“Where do you think the rest of her stash went?” Lily smiled and left. Sirius sat down on one of the couches, his leg bouncing aggressively again. He knew he shouldn’t go into your dorm room. He really shouldn’t. But, the thing is, that only made him want to more.

“Lily?” He heard your voice and looked up and saw you on the staircase, looking worse for wear. Your eyes met his and you froze, visibly freezing.

“Hey,” he scrambled to his feet, but didn’t move towards you.

“H-Hey,” you stuttered, your eyes still locked on him.

“I-uh,” he cleared his throat awkwardly. Why wasn;t he good at being sincere like this? “I came to check on you. See if you were alright.” You eyed him cautiously.

“Uh. Yeah. I-I’m fine.I-uh-well, I can’t exactly explain-” He shook his head.

“You don’t have to.”

“Yeah, but I should. It was rude. And I still haven’t apologized to Rem,” you sighed and sat down on the stair, putting your head in your hands again. He slowly walked over and sat next to you, not talking. He just put his arm around your shoulders. You turned your head into him and he rested his chin on your head.

“You ok?” You let out a breathy laugh. And shook your head.

“Not really.”You heard the clock chime and knew Lily had gone to class and purposefully left you with Sirius, knowing of your… fondness... of him. Damn, you really needed chocolate. “Don’t you have to get to class?” He chuckled.

“When have I ever been on time?” You laughed, knowing how true his statement was. Only when he walked with you was he ever early or on time. Unless it was for transfigurations. He would stand outside the door until class was five minutes in before walking in dramatically, interrupting the entire class, and taking a seat next to you. Mcgonagall would huff in annoyance, but you knew she didn’t hate it. You also knew she knew what he didn everyday and never made any course of action to change it.

“Good point. But we are supposed to have transfiguration now. Don't you think Mcgonagall will miss you?”

“I bet she wouldn’t know what to do without me.”

Meanwhile in transfiguration:

“Ok, Black will be walking through the doors in three, two, one,” Mcgonagall kept talking but looked at the doors and waited for them to bang open with Sirius. Nothing happened. She began to sweat. “Where is he? What is he getting himself into? Did he die? Did someone else accidentally die and he is hiding the body?”

Back to the common room:

“Besides, I think you need a friend right now.” You smiled and nodded. “And chocolate.”

“Did I just get compared to chocolate?” He joked.

“You should be honored. I think very highly of chocolate. In my opinion it's better than christmas.” He laughed.

“Really?”

“Yeah. Christmas comes once a year, chocolate is a year long thing.” he laughed again, and you smiled, proud that you could make him laugh like that. Then your smile faded as you thought if his girlfriend made him laugh like that.

It's not like you would ever date him. You might have a crush on him, but you not only had to keep your secret a secret, but he was also your twin brother’s friend. You couldn’t do that.

“We better get to class.” you lifted your self off him, both of you immediately missing the other person’s body heat. “Mcgongall probably thinks you killed someone.” he gave you a small smile as you ran up to your room to grab your bag. He grabbed his from the couch where he had set it. He slung it over his shoulder and you came running down the stairs, skipping the last four. “Ready?” You asked, your normal smile on your face. He smirked.

“Talking to me for a few minutes put that smile on your face?” He teased as you made your way out of the portal.

“No, I found a few bars of chocolate under my bed.” You said happily, pulling two bars out of your pocket. He rolled his eyes as you opened one and handed it to him. He stared at it for a moment before taking it.

“You don’t want it?”

“I might’ve found four and ate two while coming down the stairs.” He laughed and took a bite of his. You unwrapped yours and started eating away at it. You two made your way into Mcgonagall’s class, Sirius banging the door open.

“Minnie! Did you miss me?” He shouted. You shook your head and laughed as Mcgonagall just stared daggers at him. The class erupted into laughter, but stifled it at one glare from the professor.

“Mr. Black. How kind of you to join us. Same goes for you as well, Miss. Lupin,” her gaze was less harsh on you, but you still blushed and put your head down. You two slid into your seats and began to take notes. Luckily it had been a review day. And Sirius was a master at transfigurations, so he would help you after class since it, ironically, wasn’t your best subject(And by that I mean you were still a crazy master, just not your best class).

You two spent the lesson showing the other students up as you easily changed everything and answered questions correctly. Lily was even struggling a bit at the rate you and Sirius were commenting. Of course, yours were more sincere than Sirius’ sarcastic answers (that were always correct in some sense) but you two still ruled the lesson.

You all left the lesson, you headed down to the dungeons for potions with Remus and James while Peter, Sirius and Lily went to divinations. It was a tense silence, you walking ahead of the boys with your head down and your books pressed against your chest. James joined you in front which you were grateful for, but you knew he was trying to get you to talk to Remus. You just needed a little while, and you told him as much. He just nodded and continued walking with you to potions. You sat towards the back of the class and left Remus and James to sit in your usual spots. Someone sat besides you and you were about to ask them to move when you noticed it was Jacob.

“Hey!” You smiled kindly at the slytherin sitting beside you.

“Hi. I forgot we shared this class. You don’t mind if I?” You shook your head.

“No, of course not.” He smiled.

“You're normally sitting next to Lupin and Potter, right?”

“Yeah. Remus is my twin and we kind of just got the same group of friends. Surprising, right?" You chuckled and he chuckled with you. Slughorn began to teach and the two of you went to work on the assignment together. It wasn't a hard potion today. At least for you it wasn’t. Potions was your best class, although Slughorn was a terrible teacher. Well, it actually wasn't your best subject. That was defense against the dark arts. Potions was a close second.

"Alright class, for your next assignment you will be working with the person at your table for. You will be brewing and writing on a potion I will randomly select for each of you," you looked over at Jacob with a smile.

"Looks like we're partners," you beamed. He smiled back excitedly.

"Looks like it, Lupin. I'll start cleaning up, why don't you go up and get our assignment?" He suggested. You nodded and headed to the front, meeting James on the way.

"You and Jacob?"

"Yeah. He's pretty good at it, so whatever potion we get should be a piece of cake." You smiled up at him. He only offered you a small one in return, making you falter in confusion.

What was that about?

He went back to his table with your brother and you walked up to Slughorn.

"Ah, miss. Lupin! I was surprised to see you not with your brother."

"We had a bit of a disagreement earlier. I'm Jacobs' partner. What potion would you like us to complete?" He looked at you for a moment before his face lit up with an idea.

"How about amortentia? Yes, that would suit you two nicely,” he declared. You rolled your eyes. That was the cheesiest potion he could have given you.

“Sounds great, professor! I’ll tell Jacob and we’ll get to work on it right away,” you turned and sulked back to your table. He noticed the look on your face.

“What did he give us?”

“Amortentia.” Jacob rolled his eyes.

“Honestly? How many times has he given that out to students, can’t he be the least bit more creative?” You chuckled and grabbed your bag from the back of your chair and clung it over your shoulder before gathering your notebook.

“I completely agree. So, how about we meet in the library tomorrow to start on the paper and divy up the work?”

“Sounds good to me!” He smiled as you two walked out of the classroom, chatting a bit more as you left. You were so caught up in your conversation with Jacob you missed a black haired boy waiting for the three of you. He was leaning up against the wall, as he normally did, with his hands in his pockets and his bag by his one foot. The sight of you walking out with Jacob made him freeze and just stop breathing all together.

James and Remus followed the two of you out a few seconds later, not paying any attention to what was going on with you as you laughed at something he had said. You were just standing in the middle of the hallway. What was that about?

“Sirius!” He snapped out of his trance when James’ voice cut through the air.

“Mmh?” He looked at Remus and James, who both had a worried look on their faces.

“You ok? You zoned out for about four minutes straight.”

“Yeah, I’m fine. What’s your sister doing hanging out with that Slytherin you told to piss off earlier?” Remus whipped around and stared at you as you laughed again, his eyes narrowing dangerously at the Slytherin boy. He was the reason you two were fighting in the first place. That was a lie and Remus knew it, but that didn’t mean he had to admit it.

”She’s partnered with him for the project,” James clarified, causing both Sirius and Remus to look at him.

“He sat beside her,” Remus practically growled, tossing another glance as you waved goodbye to him and he did the same.

“What did you expect when she didn’t want to sit by us? He obviously took a liking to her earlier in the hall.”

“Why didn’t she sit by you?” Sirius asked. “You two didn’t make up yet?” Remus grumbled something that no one could hear, but they didn’t really care. You started walking over, ignoring your brother’s presence all together.

“Hey, Sirius. Hey James. Ready to head to dinner?” It was quiet for a few seconds, Remus just staring at you.

“Yeah,” James finally broke the silence. “Lets-uh-let's get to dinner. Quickly.” He took you by your shoulder and started to rush you to the dining hall.

Nothing improved over the week. The full moon was coming closer, making both you and Remus even more on edge. The two of you had attempted to make up, but that just resulted in another, bigger, blow out. James and Peter had to hold Remus back as Sirius and Lily had to hold you back. Both of you were about to pumble each other. You finally threw a very nasty statement at him before storming up to your common room. In your defense he deserved it.

You started to distance yourself from all the Marauders, even Lily in some ways as you focused on your studies. You met Jacob in the library every day to work on your potion’s assignment, which seemed to get Sirius and Remus both in a twist, though one was better at hiding it than the other. That was when the third blow up happened. The day of the full moon.

“I can’t believe you are hanging around that Slytherin.” Remus spit out to you as you were all sitting in the common room before lunch. It was Saturday and none of you felt much like going outside since you would be out all night.

“Excuse me?” You asked with raised eyebrows, putting the book you were studying out of down.

“You heard me.”

“I did, and since when have you cared? Not like you've been in my life much,” you spat. He clenched his jaw and stared at you, all of your friends ready to jump in case you got into another fight.

“Since it's a blasted Sytherin.”

“That's not even a fair judgment. Have you ever even talked to him?”

“Why would I? A pretty boy pure blood who comes from a rich family?” he scoffed. “Sounds like a fun time.” You bristled.

“You just described Sirius!” You yelled. You turned to Sirius. “No offense, of course,” he held up his hands.

“You called me pretty, I’m happy.” You rolled your eyes at him, not helping the butterflies in your stomach when he said that.

“Yeah, but he isn’t a Slytherin!”

“You're condemning all Slytherins to being evil now?”

“Aren’t they?” you were both on your feet now, causing everyone else to join you.

“No you ignoramus! And if you could see two inches past your fucking nose, then you would know that!”

“Name one person other than your precious boyfriend!”

“Slughorn!”

“Bet you can;t do it again.” He challenged. You sneered.

“Snape!” He laughed.

“Really? Him? You decide that he is not evil? Have you seen him?”

“Have you looked in the mirror much? You aren’t the model yourself!” He sneered.

“How about you?”

“What about me?:”

“You look as bad as I do, dare I say worse! And your chocolate consumption has become twenty times it normally is! Now you are hanging around a Slytherin and constantly fighting with me!”

“Me-” you laughed harshly and dramatically. Making it sound almost hysterical and mad. “Your the one who picks the fucking fight everytime!”

“Becuase you make stupid descions!”

“Like hitting a beast in the back with a chair from the top of a two story house?”

“Y/N,” Lily warned from beside you.

“To only save your arse from becoming what I am!”

“Yeah, well, bang up job, Remus Lupin! A for effort I suppose!”

“And what is that supposed to mean?”

“Silencio!” Lily yelled, pointing her wand at you. You yelled a string of curses at her and your brother before storming out of the common area. She shot Remus a glare, something that didn’t happen often.

“You know, she’s going to Hogsmead with him next weekend. I suggest you get your act together before then and actually support something your sister is doing before you remove her from your life completely,” she hissed and chased after you. All the boys were frozen from, not only Lily’s scolding, but the fact that you were going to Hogsmead with him. Sirius felt ill and just stood in place, frozen.

“Great,” James mumbled. “They’re both broken now. At least we are ok, Peter,” He looked over to where Peter had been standing. Now the boy was passed out on the ground. James sighed and shook his head. “Never mind.”

Lily found you in your normal spot, silently crying to yourself. She removed the spell and your sobs were so loud she almost silenced you again. She sat down besides you, but you made no move to put your head on her shoulder like you normally did.

She knew you didn’t want to talk to her right now. She knew it was Sirius that you wanted to speak to, but you had just announced that you were going to Hogsmead with Jacob. Sirius was trying to get over that fact.

“We should probably go meet Sev,” she murmured in your ear. “The potion will make you feel better.” You just shook your head and tried to catch your breath.

“I-I’m fine. I just… I just need a minute.”

“You are going to hate me for saying this, but you need to make up with your brother and tell Sirius how you feel. You made it seem like you and Jacob were going on a date when you know that's not what's happening.” She scolded. You nodded your head, not being able to catch your breath from how hot you were, especially with all the clothes you had on.

“Can-can you help me get the jacket off? Please?” She nodded and started to pull at the sleeve, revealing an arm full of scars. You pulled the other sleeve off, prevailing a second arm full of scars. Your breathing slowed and you were finally able to catch your breath.

You quickly wiped the tears from your eyes.

“I didn’t let anything slip. They-they don;t know anything, right?”

“I almost let you. But that wasn’t the right way to do it.” You nodded gratefully, tracing some of the scars on your arm. You were more on edge today, but, for once, you don;t think chocolate would help. But that was only because of Remus’ comment earlier.

“We should probably get your potion from Sev. I have a feeling tonight's going to be one of your… worse… ones.” You nodded, feeling it too. This wasn;t just going to be an irritating night, this was going to be a full on transformation.

“I’ll have to tie myself down in the Room of Requirement tonight,” you nodded, agreeing.

“I don’t see why you tie yourself down. You take the potion.”

“What if it doesn’t work one night? You are going to have a second werewolf around and on the grounds. It's better if I just tie myself up and be prepared.” She sighed, knowing you wouldn’t see reason in this.

“Will you at least let me be in there with you?”

“Merlin, Lily! No! Are you mad?”

“Remus at least has-”

“And Remus is a normal werewolf. I am not. Something could go wrong at any moment and I am not letting anyone get remotely close to me. You know that!”

“I’m just saying-”

“No!” her eyes widened as you snapped at her. “It's not happening, so stop asking,” you stood up and walked out of the alcove in a huff, leaving her slightly stunned, your jacket sitting where you had once occupied. She thought about going after you and giving it back, but maybe this was what you needed. Someone else to know your secret.

You realized too late that you had forgotten your jacket and turned around to get it when you heard Sirius.

“Y/N! Wait a minute!” You froze before bolting in the direction towards the alcove you knew your jacket would be in. “Y/N!” He called after you again, his voice getting closer. You pushed yourself to run faster, only making you trip over your feet in the process and tumble to the ground with a cry. You were so close to your jacket. But Sirius caught up and froze when he saw your arms. His mouth opened and closed quickly.

You grabbed him and shoved him into an empty classroom, locking the door behind you and turning back to him. He was still staring at your arms and you sighed in frustration, letting a long string of profanities fall from your lips and you paced the room, pulling the skin from your lips, trying to figure out what to do.

You could obliviate him. Of course, that wasn’t the best course of action. You really didn’t want to obliviate your best friend. While you were thinking he came back to his senses.

“Y/N?”

“Mh?” You hummed, still thinking about what to do. He grabbed you and turned you towards him.

“Y/N.”

“Yeah?” His eyes scanned your arms.

“What happened?” You bit your lip and continued to pull it apart with your teeth. WHat could you tell him? “Y/N?”

“You're gonna kill me,” you mumbled and closed your eyes moving away from him and running your hand over your face.

“I-I won’t. Just-”

“I can’t, Sirius. I can’t tell you.” You looked back towards him with nothing but sorrow in your eyes. “I’m sorry. I just can’t tell you.” Then the pieces fit together. Your mood swings during the full moons, you always carrying chocolate and your ears always perking when you heard the wrapper. The way you “just knew” when someone was close by or something was headed your way.

“Please don’t tell me-”

“Please don’t worry about it,” you begged.

“I am staring at your scared arms. How am I not supposed to worry about it?” He raised his voice. It wasn’t a yell, but it still made you flinch. He noticed and lowered his voice again. “Y/N, I need you to tell me the truth here,” you looked down and he walked closer to you. Careful steps. Very careful steps. “That night Remus got turned into a werewolf, did he-” you nodded. Tears welling in your eyes. “But you can transform into an animagus.” You swallowed the lump in your throat.

“I’m not a full one. I get testy around the full moon, but don’t always turn. And I carry the chocolate for Remus, mostly.” He shook his head.

“Why didn’t you ever say anything?”

“Because Remus has it ten times worse than me. Please don’t tell him,” you begged.

“Don’t tell him? How am I supposed to not tell him?”

“By keeping your mouth shut?” You attempted the joke, but he just shook his head at you. “Please. I am begging you, Sirius. I really need to meet Sev and I need my jacket an-”

“Snape?” You looked away and bit your lip. “Why do you…”

“He’s the best one at potions in our year. He was the only one who can, well, you know.”

“That's why you protected him when Remus said that stuff about Slytherins.”

“He’s helped me out since second year. And with all the turmoil happening between me and everyone, tonights going to be bad. I really need to get the potion off him. Like now. Please, I will tell you everything later, just please let me go and please don’t tell Remus.” His leg bounced as he stared at you from the table he sat down at. He shrugged off his own jacket and threw it over your shoulders.

“Get your potion. I expect everything to be explained tomorrow and I will not tell your brother, yet.” You smiled and hugged him, throwing your arms around his neck.

“Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you.” You mumbled into his neck as he hugged you back.

“Yeah yeah. Just be careful, ok?” he set you firmly on the ground again. “Promise me.” You nodded and slid your hands through the arm holes of his jacket. It was far too big for you, but you didn’t really care. First off because it was hiding your scars. Second off, you had Sirius Black’s jacket on, and that may or may not have made your heart beat out of your chest. And then if you add the way he was looking at you on top of that, you were dead.

“I promise. Thank you, Sirius. You are a life saviour.” You left the room and he stood staring at that door, cursing himself and needed to find Lily, pronto.

“Evans!” He yelled into the great hall where the red head was sitting. She looked over at him with an eye roll, but then noticed his serious expression. Which was, ironically, something he rarely had on his face. She stood up and scurried over to him and he pulled her out of the great hall. “You knew, didn;t you? About Y/N.” She shrugged, guilty.

“She made me swear to secrecy. Do you know where she went? She got mad at me and stomped off without her jacket. I’m assuming you-”

“Saw her hundreds of scars? Yes.”

“She showed you all of them” She creased her eyebrows and his eyes narrowed.

“All? Where is all?” Lily swallowed.

“Everywhere?” His eyes flickered down the hall, almost as if he were looking for you.

“Why does she have more than Remus?”

“Her body heals differently and she didn’t have the ointment he gets from the hospital wing, despite my persistent begging for her to get it.”

“Does her boyfriend know about this?”

“Her what?”

“Jacob. The Slytherin.”

“Sirius, they aren’t dating.”

“But he’s taking her to Hogsmead.”

“To help him pick out a gift for his little sister’s birthday. I said that in the heat of the moment. She was pissed at Remus. Please, don’t make her feel worse about keeping this a secret. And no, she just met him a week ago. She’s known Remus since she was born and you since everywhere in between.” Sirius looked down the hall again before back at Lily.

“Is there anything I can do?”

“Do not tell Remus until after the full moon tonight. They are both on edge and it's not going to be a pretty fight.” Sirius nodded, recalling how badly he had wanted to yell at her for not telling them about this.

“Anything else?”

“Go easy on her. It had to of taken a lot of guts not to obliviate you on the spot.” Sirius nodded, knowing she had contemplated it for a split second.

“Yeah, ok. I can do that.”

“Thank you, Sirius. You're a good friend.” He scoffed.

“Tell that to Mooney when he’s beating the daylights out of me.” Lily put a hand on his shoulder before disappearing back into the Great Hall. “He’s gonna kill me for this,” Sirius mumbled before following her into the hall.

You had just finished tying the ropes onto your arms. They were charmed so no matter what tugged at them they would hold you in place until the full moon was over. You had tied them extra tight tonight for precaution. Lily walked in with her arms full of chocolate and some other food for before and after the full moon.

“Do you have to tie them so tight?”

“Yes,” You grunted as you pulled one more time to triple check if they were tight enough.

“Sirius pulled me aside today,” she hummed slightly and took a seat in front of you on the floor. You glanced at his jacket.

“Speaking of,” you said before she could say anything. “Can you return his jacket? I don’t want it to get ruined or anything and I didn’t see him before I came here.”

“You didn;t see him because you didn’t want to. You can’t avoid him or telling our friends about this.”

“Yeah, but I can put it off for as long as possible.” She shook her head at you.

“You are unbelievable.”

“Yep. Can you pass some chocolate over please.” She started to grab it but you changed your mind. “Actually, just hand me the grapes.” She paused and looked up at you.

“Is this about what Remus said?” You looked away from her. “Y/N/N. Is this about what Remus said?”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“He didn’t mean-”

“Yeah he did. My brother may be a lot of things, but a liar isn’t one of them. Especially during a full moon.”

“Well, I’m sure he didn’t mean it the way it came out.”

“I’m pretty sure he did.” She just shook her head and handed you the chocolate which you reluctantly (not really) took and began to devour.

“You should get out of here, Lily. It’ll be starting in a little.”

“You took the potion?” You nodded and gestured to an empty vile a few feet away from you. She picked it up and gathered Sirius’s coat. “Are you sure you’ll be ok?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. Thanks again, Lily. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Alright, I’ll see you tomorrow, Y/N.” And then she left, leaving you to munch on chocolate in the deafening silence. Counting the seconds until it would begin.

Lily stepped through the doors and back into the hallway, she looked at Sirius who was leaning against the wall with his hands in his pockets.

“I’m going to murder Remus later,” she grumbled and walked down the hall. Sirius jogged after her.

“Why?”

“Here’s your jacket. You know that comment he made about her eating a lot of chocolate?” Sirius took his jacket back and nodded. “She took it to heart and doesn’t want to eat it any more. Well, as much as she normally does. And it makes her feel as close to as hundred percent as she can get around this time.” Sirius frowned. “You know, she cares so much about Remus, and I really don’t think he gets that,” Lily shook her head.

“I think you may be right,” Sirius mumbled and looked back down the hallway the two of them had just come from.

You woke on the floor in the Room. The floor was ice cold and your clothes were in shreds and were hanging onto your body loosely. You were bleeding here and there and sat back, rubbing the back of your neck you groan. You could see the sun was rising from the window the room always provided you.

You glanced at the pile of chocolate and went to get it before you untied yourself but stopped. No. You didn’t need anything right now. You’d be fine.

You undid the rope on your arms and legs. You held your wrists carefully, they were bruised and splattered with dry blood from you tugging at them and flinched every time you ran your hand over an open cut.

Shaking yourself, you stood up and grabbed a fresh set of clothes and your “Journal”. After every full moon you would write down what you remembered, just to get it out of your head. You never talked about it, like your brother did. He really didn;t have to, but you knew that he always needed to get it out to. So instead of making his friends hear it since they were already there with him, he told you.

You quickly rinsed the blood off yourself to the best of your ability until you could take a shower, and tossed on a pair of oversized sweatpants and a tank top with a jacket. The room had provided you with a couch, which you gratefully took with a book, your journal, and some of the non-chocolate food Lily had brought with her yesterday. It would be a while until you would be mentaly fine enough to leave.

Remus was in the medical wing sleeping, three of the four boys asleep in the uncomfortable chairs that surrounded his bed, as usual. Madame Pomfrey had been up and had been ready to tend to Remus’ wounds as usual and had left him and the boys to sleep. James and Peter found it easy to slip into sleep for the rest of the morning, but Sirius found it harder than normal, and he knew it was because of you.

After his ninth attempt to fall asleep he rose and left the room, a silent nod to the healer sitting at her cabinet and writing something, before he left through the doors and quickly made his way to the Room of Requirement.

No one was up yet, he didn’t even know if you were. But he knew no one should have to go through that alone, which you obviously had been doing since second year. It just didn’t sit right with him. He stopped at the wall leading to the Room of Requirement and waited for doors to form. Which they did. He opened the door quietly and stepped in to see you on the couch you looked up, expecting Lily.

“Sirius?”

“Hey.”

“How’d you know where I was?”

“Lily.”

“Right. Well, shouldn’t you be asleep in the hospital wing then?”

“Couldn’t sleep,” He shrugged and sat on the couch you were occupying. “Studying?” You shrugged and moved some of your notes, still not emotionally or mentaly stable enough to deal with people. But because it was him, and your emotions were still in a knot of confusion, you let him stay.

Did your heart always beat this fast when he was this close?

“Did you get your jacket back?” You picked up a piece of chocolate. “Chocolate?” He grabbed the bar and opened it.

“Yeah, Lily gave it back to me yesterday. I was a little disappointed not to see you before the full moon.” You shrugged and ate a strawberry, eyeing Sirius’s chocolate with want, but resisted opening your own.

“I took the potion and rushed in here to get ready,” you motioned to the ropes on the ground; you hadn’t had the energy to clean it up yet.

“Ropes?” His gaze flickered between you, the ropes and your hands, which you were playing with nervously. “You… tie yourself down?” He looked almost horrified.

“Yeah,” you looked at the wall. “Precautions. I don’t take them lightly.” He didn’t know what to say to that. He knew Remus was cautions about this but tying yourself up like that while you went through the agony of transforming?

“Let me see your hands,” he reached out to you, but the motion only made you bring them into yourself. You got shit from Lily when she saw them, you didn’t need that twice. “Y/N, please.” You swallowed and handed them to him. His leg started to bounce at the new, red marks on your wrists.

“It-it's really fine.” you tried to pull them back, but he didn’t let you. He didn’t look up at you and you waited for him to start yelling. Lily always did.

“How bad does it hurt?” You were shocked by the amount of kindness in his voice. You swallowed.

“Uh-not terribly. I mean, my wrists are kind of used to getting torn up like this, so I mean…” You bit your lip and tried to peel the layers off. “I mean, I guess it kind of stings. ANd my back kind aches, but uh… its.. Uh.. fine.”

“Why don’t you go to the hospital wing?”

“Because you guys and Remus are there. If I showed up every full moon when you were all there, it would be a bit suspicious, don’t ya think?”

“Yes, but you’re injured.” You shrugged sadly.

“I've had worse than a few rope burns. I mean, you’ve seen my arms.”

“And Lily said that's not even close to the end of your scars,” you flinched slightly. Which was he talking about? Mentaly or physically?

You knew this wasn;t the moment to be exactly thinking it, but damn when he wanted to he could literally be so gentle and it made you want to burst.

“Yeah. Before the potion and figuring out the rope charm it was pretty bumpy. I mean, it's still not exactly smooth sailing, but- I’m rambling now,” you shook your head and pulled your hands away from him, tucking your hands into your sleeves.

“Have you eaten any chocolate yet?” He asked, rising and making his way to the pile on the floor.

“I haven’t really felt like it,” you shrugged, not even attempting to make the lie seem real. He rolled his eyes and started rifling through the bars.

“Liar.” He grabbed one and tossed it to you. “Here. Eat this, you’ll feel better.”

“I’m fine, Sirius. Really.” You poked at the bar a few times, contemplating taking it. “You look exhausted though. You were out with my brother all night, you should get some sleep.”

“So should you.” You rolled your eyes and looked back down at the potions book in your hands.

“I have to study for this potions assignment with Jacob. I’ve been too distracted with this past full moon.”

“Yes I can see how turning into a werewolf would be distracting,” he scoffed and took the book from your hands.

“Sirius,” you whined.

“What potion did you even get?” His face fell a bit when he noticed the love potion on the page. The majority of the students who did this potion together ended up together.

“It's easy, but a lot of information,” you sighed and grabbed the book back. “I mean, not easy easy. But its,” you shook your head. “Never mind. Forget it,” you sighed and ran your hands over your face.

“Who do you think you're gonna smell?” He asked, leaning back casually, even though he hated himself for asking.

“Probably no none. And the person I hope I smell, well I doubt they'd even consider me,” you rolled your eyes. “I’ll probably smell chocolate and lavender. Or something like that.” But in your head you weren;t thinking about chocolate and lavender. Ok, that was a lie. You were thinking about chocolate, it was right in front of you and your sensitive sense of smell was amplifying it. But you were really expecting to smell was the boy sitting next to you. And you knew you wouldn’t mix his scent with anyone else's.

“Heh. They’d be crazy not to, love.” You blushed but buried your head into your book further. He looked over at you and bounced his leg a few more times.

“You should probably get back to Rem. I’ll probably follow you a bit later to check in on him and give him some chocolate.” He frowned.

“Shouldn;t you be eating all this?”

“I only normally eat a few pieces and give the rest to him. He has it worse than me.” You shrugged. “He deserves it more.”

“And aren’t you supposed to be mad at him?” You shrugged again.

“How my full moons go are based on my emotions. It's better to make up with him. Make everything go back to normal, like it normally does when we get into an argument.”

“Ok, but it wasn;t fair the way he treated you. I know he was on edge, but-”

“Sirius, it's fine. Really. We were both just on edge. And it was fair. I mean, not the Slytherin comments, but the rest of it was.”

“Will you at least eat something before you go? Or get some sleep?”

“I slept plenty after my transformation and I ate lots.”

“Chocolate,” He said exasperatedly. “Eat some chocolate.” You took the bar of chocolate he had given you and took a bite out of it.

“Never thought someone would have to make me eat chocolate.”

“Never thought I’d have to make you,” you frowned, thinking back to your twin's comment.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, you would just eat it without even thinking. Ever since Remus made that comment-”

“Rightfully said,” you hummed cutting him off. He sighed and took your book again, kneeling in front of you.

“Why do you care so much about what he says? Especially when he’s not himself?”

“Because I need to make him feel happier. He’s like this because of me. Because of my mistake to want to see the stars he’s in pain.”

“And so are you. Why do you keep torturing yourself?”

“I’m not. I just… I don’t know. God I’m such a mess afterwards,” you groaned, tears pricking your eyes.

“Yeah, well, that's expected,” he smirked and it made you give hima laugh-sob in reply. “Here,” he urged, handing you the half finished chocolate bar. You took a desperate few bites out of it and let the tears fall. He wiped them away quickly and let his hand fall on your knee. “Better?” you nodded and wiped your face to rid it of any chocolate.

“Yeah, sor-”

“Don’t apologize. You should sleep. You look absolutely horrid,” you laughed pitifully and nodded, finally admitting to your exhaustion.

“Yeah, ok. You might be right.”

“Might be? I’m always right.” You laughed again and went to stand up.

“Yeah yeah. Alright. You're always right. I’ll sleep after I make sure Remus is alright.” You promised.

He wanted to argue but knew he wouldn’t win.

“Alright. Come on. Then I’m taking you straight to the dorm room.”

“I have to clean up first. Go ahead, I’ll follow.” He shook his head.

“I’ll come back later and do it.”

“Sirius-”

“No arguing. Come on,” he dragged you out of the room. You visited your brother who was still asleep. James and Peter were up and waiting for Remus to wake up. Once you saw him Sirius dragged you out and to your dorm room forcing you to go to sleep or he would make you eat chocolate until you turned into it. You gladly fell into a dreamless sleep, unknowing of him wrapping your wrists since you were such a heavy sleeper.

You woke up on Monday when Lily shook you awake for class. You could tell she felt bad about it, but you assured her it was fine. You noticed your hands were wrapped and wondered who had done it. That's when you noticed your stomach growling. Quickly you got dressed and shoved chocolate into your bag for Remus and ran down to the Great Hall where everyone already was. You took your usual seat in between Remus and Sirius.

“Hey!” You said cheerfully and grabbed some food and put it on your plate. “Rem, could you pass me the chocolate chip muffins please?” He did so as if nothing was wrong and even bumped your shoulder with his. Sirius just watched, not understanding how your three huge fights could so easily turn back to this. All your classes went as usual, even lunch went well.

Then it was time for potions. You walked in with James and Remus but had to make your way to Jacob instead of sitting with them. You had decided it would be fair to split the research and then have him write the essay while you made the potion.

“Hey Jacob!” You smiled brightly at the Slytherin.

“Hello, Y/N. You have your half of the research?” You nodded and handed him your papers. Excellent. Should we get started then?”

“Sounds good to me! Who do you think you’ll smell?” He glanced over at a hufflepuff with bright red hair across the room.

“I hope I know who.” You smiled. “You?” You blushed.

“I wish. I mean, I have an idea, but they’ll never like me back, especially now.” He shook his head.

“You're super cool, Y/N/N. They’d be insane not to.”

“Thanks, Jacob. Let's get to it then?”

“Lets!” For the rest of class the two of you worked, quietly chatting occasionally as you finished the project together. You heard an explosion and glanced up and Remus and James who were just staring at their cauldron. James obviously being the one who added the wrong ingredient. You snorted and went back to your own potion mixing it together carefully, the brew being the perfect shade of pink. He sat up in his seat and looked at you wide eyed. “It's finished?”

You smiled. “You smell it already? It still has a few hours of brewing.” He nodded. He looked over to the hufflepuff boy.

“Yeah. I can smell it. You?” You swallowed and took a whiff.

Gasoline, smoke, cinnamon apples and chocolate. God that was it. That was him.

“Yeah,” you sighed. “Yeah I smell it.” Slughorn came over and looked into the cauldron.

“My my, looks like you two are finished already! Is your essay finished as well?” You looked over at Jacob who wrote a few more things down and handed it to Slughorn who skimmed it, seeming to be happy with it. “Splendid splendid. Well done you two. You can be finished for today. As a matter of fact, everyone is dismissed if you feel like you are finished. We will be continuing this tomorrow and then they will be due the next day.” The class erupted into chatter and the Hufflepuff boy came over, Jacob held his breath as he stopped in front of him smelling the air. He looked over at him, lust blown eyes.

He bit his lip and sauntered out of the room with a swing to his hips, glancing back at him before leaving the door. You chuckled as he just stared, gawking.

“Go get him, Lover boy!” He grinned at you and ran out of the room after the Hufflepuff. You cleaned up as the room emptied. You told Remus and James to go on without you to lunch. You would be there for a few minutes.

You continued to clean up the station, not bothering to stop smelling your potion, the scent put you at ease. It always did. And you really needed to be at ease right then.

You walked back over to your workbench to see Sirius entering the room.

“Hey, Sirius!” You smiled and he smiled back before stopping, smelling the air. He looked at the potion, swallowed and then back at you. You frowned and went back to cleaning up, making sure not to look at him. But you couldn’t help but wonder who he was smelling. It was clearly not you.

He began to help you clean up and the air was suddenly tense between you. And you just couldn’t take it anymore.

“So, who do you smell?” You asked, jumping onto the work table and cocking your head at him. He shrugged. “Come on, I want to know. As your best friend, I have a right to know.” He hummed in response and inclined his head.

“Just like how I had a right to know your secret?” You looked away.

“I said I was sorry. I just, I was scared if it got out that Remus would find out. I just didn’t want Remus to know that he got turned and I got turned. I would have much rather it been me and only me rather than the both of us.”

“I would've rather it be neither of you,” you smiled up at him.

“Yeah, same. So who do you smell?”

“Why don;t you tell me?” he countered and you chewed your lip. “Come on, just tell me,” he got closer to you, smiling as he glanced up at him. You have no idea where the rush of courage came from. But it came.

“You,” you shrugged, he went wide eyed and stepped back, coughing.

“M-me?” You shrugged, playing it off.

“You,” he smirked at you, composing himself again.

“And what exactly do I smell like?” He asked, placing a hand on either side of your body. You thought about it for a moment, but you knew. Even without him right in front of you and the potion right beside you, you knew.

“Gasoline and smoke from that motorcycle you always work on, Cinnamon and apples because though you’d never admit it they are your favorite, and chocolate because you're always around me or Rem.” he stared at you. You narrowed your eyes at him. “Who do you smell?” It took him a moment to find his voice, and each second he took you waited in agony. What if you just confessed to your best friend and he didn’t like you back. But he smiled after a moment.

“You,” he replied simply, making your eyes go wide. You had been hoping, but it was actually the last thing you had expected to hear.

“An-and what exactly do I smell like?”

“Lavender, from that motorizer you always wear before you go to sleep, chocolate because you practically survive on the stuff- which is adorable-, and ink because you are constantly spilling it all over the place,” as he spoke his voice had gotten lower and lower, and with his voice his gaze also dropped. It dropped all the way down to your lips which you were playing with.

“Wo-wow,” you stuttered out, not knowing how to react. WHat do you do? You were panicking. And before you could say anything or do anything, his lips were on yours and he was standing in between your legs. His mouth was warm on yours and you wrapped your arms around his neck bringing him closer as he brought his hands to your hips to bring you closer. But then a familiar thought rang through your head.

You don’t deserve this…

“Sirius, wait,” you pulled away and he leaned away from you, his hands still on your hips, he looked at you curiously.

“What's wrong?”

“I-I don’t deserve this. I-I can’t put you through this.” He scrunched his eyebrows together.

“What do you mean?” You buried your head in your hands and shook your head. Headache was approaching and you needed your chocolate. After the full moon was never as bad as before, but that didn’t mean you didn’t have your share of problems.

Sirius seemed to sense your need for chocolate because he dove into your bag and pulled out a piece, unwrapping it for you. He handed it to you and you took it gratefully.

“Can you explain what you meant?”

“You deserve better than me. I mean. You're you. And who am I? I’m a weirdo screw up who got her brother bitten by a werewolf.”

“No,” he pulled your face back up to his and looked at you. “You are perfect. I have had a crush on you since second year. And I’ll be damned if I let your insecurities get in the way of me taking care of you.”

“But-”

He shoved the chocolate back into your mouth, shaking his head.

“Do you like me?” you nodded as you chewed the chocolate. He smiled and pecked your lips, your mouth still full of chocolate. “That's all that matters to me. I think we have a few things to tell your brother now though,” you frowned and nodded sadly. You didn’t want to, you really didn’t. He kissed you again and you brought him in closer. You still felt guilty, and you knew you always would. You couldn’t change that. But you could try for him. You could be the best for him. Because the boy standing in front of you, wiping excess chocolate from his own mouth, he was everything you had ever wanted.

And you would be everything he ever wanted in return.

#sirius x reader #sirius x you #sirius black #sirius x y/n #Lupin reader #remus x you #mauraders x reader #mauraders #hq angst #hp fluff #fluff and angst

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